# Why do I attract ugly men?! :(



## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

Today, if I was not having a bad day already, a really stocky and short Hispanic guy in my class asked me out for a drink. This kind of lowered my self esteem and made me feel really ugly. 

Do any of you have problems attracting the unattractive folks?
The decent looking intelligent guys seem to look, but they never approach. 

BTW, does it have to do with me being Asian? Am I more likely to attract minorities like Blacks and Hispanics rather than White guys?


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Ugly people are more desperate so they have to try harder.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Aren't you the same girl who said she gets approached a lot in class? Are they all ugly to you?


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## Hadron92 (Apr 17, 2009)

are you only interested in white guys? if that is so, you should ask them out yourself. :roll

you'd be surprised how much can be accomplished when you take the initiative.


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## StrangetoBehold (Apr 26, 2012)

I'm more inclined to feel flattered when someone admits their attraction for me, so I never consider it to be a problem if I'm approached by a man who I don't happen to find attractive. This is certainly not the sort of event that would ruin my day or make it worse. They are people too. They deserve love as much as the next person. _At least_ you're being approached. I say kudos to them for having the courage to do what others do not. Maybe you should ask out these decent looking intelligent guys you speak of.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

Hadron said:


> are you only interested in white guys? if that is so, you should ask them out yourself. :roll
> 
> you'd be surprised how much can be accomplished when you take the initiative.


Why ? Are white guys more shy?
Yes, i find white men the most attractive, also i will tolerate some latino guys if they look decent... I wonder what white guys really find attractive in girls...


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

StrangetoBehold said:


> I'm more inclined to feel flattered when someone admits their attraction for me, so I never consider it to be a problem if I'm approached by a man who I don't happen to find attractive. This is certainly not the sort of event that would ruin my day or make it worse. They are people too. They deserve love as much as the next person. _At least_ you're being approached. I say kudos to them for having the courage to do what others do not. Maybe you should ask out these decent looking intelligent guys you speak of.


I rather not be approached AT ALL than be approached by a stupid and really ugly guy sorry if i sound super shallow...


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Try looking at inner beauty, instead of the outside. That is what is really ugly.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

StrangetoBehold said:


> I'm more inclined to feel flattered when someone admits their attraction for me, so I never consider it to be a problem if I'm approached by a man who I don't happen to find attractive. This is certainly not the sort of event that would ruin my day or make it worse. They are people too. They deserve love as much as the next person. _At least_ you're being approached. I say kudos to them for having the courage to do what others do not. Maybe you should ask out these decent looking intelligent guys you speak of.


Why do i have to approach decent guys??? Im scared ****lesss to approach any guy. What kind of girls do decent looking men approach ? Lol


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

WintersTale said:


> Try looking at inner beauty, instead of the outside. That is what is really ugly.


These guys probly dot have any inner beauty... They can barely speak in a coherent manner...


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## ManOfFewWords (Mar 20, 2012)

ilovemusic89 said:


> What kind of girls do decent looking men approach ? Lol


Not girls with your attitude


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## erasercrumbs (Dec 17, 2009)

+1 Cynicism

Thank you, internet.


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## StrangetoBehold (Apr 26, 2012)

ilovemusic89 said:


> I rather not be approached AT ALL than be approached by a stupid and really ugly guy sorry if i sound super shallow...


I suppose you could always tell them you have a boyfriend so that they stop asking, though there is no way to stop random guys from asking you out.


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

Aww, jeez, don't be so harsh...at least they had the courage to ask.  I think I would be flattered to be approached by most any guy, drop dead gorgeous or not.


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> Why do i have to approach decent guys??? Im scared ****lesss to approach any guy. What kind of girls do decent looking men approach ? Lol


They generally approach girls who aren't horrible human beings.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

rymo said:


> They generally approach girls who aren't horrible human beings.


WTF?


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## G i r l (Jul 30, 2012)

ManOfFewWords said:


> Not girls with your attitude


Exactly what I was going to say :um


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

ilovemusic89 said:


> WTF?


Sorry, but you do seem a little shallow and extremely judgmental based on your comments. :um Give the guy a chance...what's the worse that could happen? He buys you a drink...if it doesn't work out, then you're free to move on. It's okay to have standards, but it doesn't have to be so cut and dry.


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## John The Great (Jul 23, 2012)

We could probably answer why you get approached by guys a lot easier if you posted an image of yourself.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

earlgreytea said:


> Sorry, but you do seem a little shallow and extremely judgmental based on your comments. :um Give the guy a chance...what's the worse that could happen? He buys you a drink...if it doesn't work out, then you're free to move on.


I can understand not dating someone you aren't attracted to. That's normal. OP, if you are frustrated with the guys who approach then I second taking the stance on approaching yourself. Btw, it's scary for guys to approach too


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## awfulness (Jul 13, 2009)

so serious question: how many girls actually think like she does?

she's unbelievably judgemental of guys...


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

earlgreytea said:


> Sorry, but you do seem a little shallow and extremely judgmental based on your comments. :um Give the guy a chance...what's the worse that could happen? He buys you a drink...if it doesn't work out, then you're free to move on. It's okay to have standards, but it doesn't have to be so cut and dry.


He's shorter than me for goodnes sakes and im not too fond of short hispanic guys, neither is my mother... In fact she says she will disown me if i happen to date a black or hispanic guy...serious.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

bwidger85 said:


> I can understand not dating someone you aren't attracted to. That's normal. OP, if you are frustrated with the guys who approach then I second taking the stance on approaching yourself.


^yep.



ilovemusic89 said:


> He's shorter than me for goodnes sakes and im not too fond of short hispanic guys, neither is my mother... In fact she says she will disown me if i happen to date a black or hispanic guy...serious.


So your mother is racist.


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## awfulness (Jul 13, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> He's shorter than me for goodnes sakes and im not too fond of short hispanic guys, neither is my mother... In fact she says she will disown me if i happen to date a black or hispanic guy...serious.


do you really think what you just posted is making you look better :/. you're still being really judgemental and shallow


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

awfulness said:


> so serious question: how many girls actually think like she does?
> 
> she's unbelievably judgemental of guys...


No im not unbelievably judgemental, but based on my family's income level and the time and amt of money i spend on clothes and the time that it takes me in the morning to get ready for class, i would expect at least more "average looking and averagely intelligent" guys to show interest in me.


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

ilovemusic89 said:


> He's shorter than me for goodnes sakes and im not too fond of short hispanic guys, neither is my mother... In fact she says she will disown me if i happen to date a black or hispanic guy...serious.


Well, it's okay to turn him down if you aren't attracted to him, but you could have a better mindset about it? Rather than thinking "Wow, this guy is so ugly, he must be ugly inside and out." you could simply think something along the lines of "Wow, I'm so flattered. I bet he's a nice guy, but I'm not really attracted to him."

And if you deem all the men who approach you to be ugly stupid people, then have the balls to initiate conversation with people you _are_ attracted to.


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## Hadron92 (Apr 17, 2009)

to be honest, most girls are just like you, op. a little word of advice though - be more tactful. people don't look too nicely upon people who are too...upfront.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

awfulness said:


> do you really think what you just posted is making you look better :/. you're still being really judgemental and shallow


Well i cant help judging guys partly because of the ideas my mom instills in me plus, is it wrong to have preferences?


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## Wirt (Jan 16, 2009)

meeps said:


> So your mother is racist.


yo mama's so racist....

Huh. There arent any racism yo mama jokes.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

meeps said:


> ^yep.
> 
> So your mother is racist.


Bluntly put, yes.


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

Hadron said:


> to be honest, most girls are just like you, op. a little word of advice though - be more tactful. people don't look too nicely upon people who are too...upfront.


I disagree. But maybe that's because I don't have that mindset? Plus, I think average looking guys have more of a chance with attractive girls than average looking girls have with attractive guys.


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## Nada (Dec 19, 2004)

What happen to all those guys in your class who you said liked you or are they all short & ugly? Maybe you're the one who's ugly, on the inside.


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## awfulness (Jul 13, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> No im not unbelievably judgemental, but based on my family's income level and the time and amt of money i spend on clothes and the time that it takes me in the morning to get ready for class, i would expect at least more "average looking and averagely intelligent" guys to show interest in me.


your posts are making me feel really bad, especially after that other guy said most other girls are like you but they just don't say it as bluntly.

why is your family's income level even a factor in all this. Anyway you just sound very unempathetic and self centered, because these "ugly men" are taking a risk and putting themselves out there to talk to you, and somehow you're insulted that they would even approach you because they're so clearly beneath you. you don't care at all about them as people, you're just thinking of yourself and how much better you are than them..

man i really hope this isn't how most girls secretly think.


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## Jollygoggles (Mar 3, 2011)

Maybe you lack character and an air of kindness.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

I don't see what the problem is. A lot of girls don't like being approached by unattractive guys.


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

awfulness said:


> your posts are making me feel really bad, especially after that other guy said most other girls are like you but they just don't say it as bluntly.
> 
> why is your family's income level even a factor in all this. Anyway you just sound very unempathetic and self centered, because these "ugly men" are taking a risk and putting themselves out there to talk to you, and somehow you're insulted that they would even approach you because they're so clearly beneath you. you don't care at all about them as people, you're just thinking of yourself and how much better you are than them..
> 
> man i really hope this isn't how most girls secretly think.


Don't feel bad. I really don't think "most" girls think this way.


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## Attica! Attica! (Oct 8, 2008)

Nada said:


> What happen to all those guys in your class who you said liked you or are they all short & ugly? Maybe you're the one who's ugly, on the inside.


:agree


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

Peter Attis said:


> I don't see what the problem is. A lot of girls don't like being approached by unattractive guys.


It's her attitude about it, not her actual opinion. Obviously.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

Nada said:


> What happen to all those guys in your class who you said liked you or are they all short & ugly? Maybe you're the one who's ugly, on the inside.


There are a lack of decent looking guys in my class. But, lo and behold, the ugliest of the bunch asks me out.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

earlgreytea said:


> I disagree. But maybe that's because I don't have that mindset? Plus, I think average looking guys have more of a chance with attractive girls than average looking girls have with attractive guys.


Huh?


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

ManOfFewWords said:


> Not girls with your attitude


glad someone said it :lol.

Honestly, you should be glad you attract anyone. But to answer your question, the reason those "decent" guys don't give you attention is probably just because you're shy and introverted. If you were more outgoing, I think you'd have a better chance. People are usually attracted to others of the same social standing.


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## ohgodits2014 (Mar 18, 2011)

Dang, I wish people were as offended as this when someone was making a commentary about ugly/unattractive girls.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

rymo said:


> It's her attitude about it, not her actual opinion. Obviously.


Nah. Some of you just seem mad. If you have a problem with it, stop being so ugly.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

rednosereindeer said:


> Dang, I wish people were as offended as this when someone was making a commentary about ugly/unattractive girls.


Yeah, there is a distinction there, for sure


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## SupaDupaFly (Sep 1, 2011)

This won't end well


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## AwkBoy (Jun 7, 2012)

Wooooowwww It's rather disappointing you think black males such as I are ugly and stupid, or, should I say, ignorant. Which not all of us are. But I cannot conjure anger towards you knowing that your mother raised you that way, and preferences are preferences after all.

But to the point of this thread, if you continue to find yourself in this predicament, maybe you ignore your "anxiety" and approach these "average looking and averagely intelligent" _white_ guys instead of waiting on your pompous *** for them to come to you.

Good day.


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

Peter Attis said:


> Nah. Some of you just seem mad. If you have a problem with it, stop being so ugly.


:l


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## blc1 (Jan 8, 2009)

I suppose no one likes being approached by someone they aren't attracted to, but no one, no matter how they look, is entitled to be approached only by those who meet their standards of attractiveness. Anyone can try for anyone, and being approached is a flattering gesture no matter who it is, unless you think the flattery of "ugly" people is worthless.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

earlgreytea said:


> sorry, but you do seem a little shallow and extremely judgmental based on your comments. :um give the guy a chance...what's the worse that could happen? He buys you a drink...if it doesn't work out, then you're free to move on. It's okay to have standards, but it doesn't have to be so cut and dry.


SHE DOESN'T OWE HIM her ******!


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

rednosereindeer said:


> Dang, I wish people were as offended as this when someone was making a commentary about ugly/unattractive girls.


They usually are. Haven't you seen some of the threads on SAS? If a guy made a thread like this, he would get the same kind of reactions. Being shallow and judgmental is generally frowned upon.


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## Luka92 (Dec 13, 2011)

This whole thread...wow.


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

Peter Attis said:


> SHE DOESN'T OWE HIM her ******!


Her what, exactly?

---------------------

If only people were as attractive (or unattractive) on the outside as they are on the inside....life would be so much easier, ahahahaha.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

ilovemusic89 said:


> These guys probly dot have any inner beauty... They can barely speak in a coherent manner...


I don't know them, but they might be shy. Less attractive men usually are more shy.

Or they might have aspergers or a learning disability. If they do, I sincerely hope I don't run into a woman with your mindset, because I have ADD.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

earlgreytea said:


> Her what, exactly?


I can't say it because I said d*** once on the 18+ board and my post got edited.

But... you know.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

rednosereindeer said:


> Dang, I wish people were as offended as this when someone was making a commentary about ugly/unattractive girls.


That's what I thought, but then I remembered a few of those "should I date ugly girls to boost my self-confidence" and they did ignite aggression towards the OP (as well as the obvious few sympathizers)...


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## awfulness (Jul 13, 2009)

Peter Attis said:


> I can't say it because I said d*** once on the 18+ board and my post got edited.
> 
> But... you know.


nobody's saying she should date guys she doesn't want to talk to

but she doesn't have to be a b**** about it.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

She may come across as a ***** on here because she's venting, but we have no idea what she actually said to the guy.

Some of her posts do come off as slightly racist, though.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Most guys on here feel ugly and feel rejected by the opposite sex.

Silly girl, she should have known better than to start a thread like this. Especially after all the "male virgin" and "bad boy/nice guy" threads...


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## Droidsteel (Mar 22, 2012)

If you try taking these approches as compliments, you might find them a little more bareable.


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## ohgodits2014 (Mar 18, 2011)

AllToAll said:


> That's what I thought, but then I remembered a few of those "should I date ugly girls to boost my self-confidence" and they did ignite aggression towards the OP (as well as the obvious few sympathizers)...


I guess what I really meant was: I wish the same people who are SO offended right not weren't the same people who would thoughtlessly use hurtful words like the ones in OP and then resort to something about freedom of speech when told not to be an ***.


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## ty44 (Jul 29, 2012)

Christ this thread made me cringe.


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## lizzy19 (Jun 16, 2012)

lol Omg! that happens to me too  it always the ones I'm not attracted to who approach me.


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

Poster said:


> Christ this thread made me cringe.


Me too. :|

I don't get it her anger really. When someone is attracted to you - it's flattering. It doesn't matter if you are attracted to them, it doesn't matter what they look like. A fellow human being finds you attractive - that should be a good thing. She's acting like they are slugs crawling up her arm or something. This thread is extremely judgmental and shallow.

OP - How would you feel if you went up to a guy that you are actually attracted to, and he turned you down and had your attitude? "Ew, why's this girl asking me out, she's ugly and Asian". Yes, I threw in Asian, because you are acting that way towards Blacks and Hispanics. It's extremely cruel and shallow. Maybe if you switch the situation around and look at it that way - can you perhaps see why we all think your response is bad?


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## merryk (Dec 25, 2008)

I see this type of thread really does a lot to boost the self-esteem of guys here trying to work up courage to talk to women :roll (pardon the sarcasm)
We all have different attitudes and opinions, so keep trying...keep trying...


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## ty44 (Jul 29, 2012)

I couldn't be bothered to read the entire thread, is the original poster still posting?


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

This thread should just be locked. It's not going to go anywhere. As merryk said, this is just discouraging for any guys on here with low self-esteem. It's also pretty racist :no


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## fetisha (Jan 13, 2012)

Peter Attis said:


> Nah. Some of you just seem mad. If you have a problem with it, stop being so ugly.


lol ouch


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

ilovemusic89 said:


> Today, if I was not having a bad day already, a really stocky and short Hispanic guy in my class asked me out for a drink. This kind of lowered my self esteem and made me feel really ugly.
> 
> Do any of you have problems attracting the unattractive folks?
> The decent looking intelligent guys seem to look, but they never approach.
> ...


Lol!!!:clap


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

Peter Attis said:


> Nah. Some of you just seem mad. If you have a problem with it, stop being so ugly.


 :troll

Nah, it's pretty obvious the OP is being pretty dickish about it. Like monrooe said, she's talking about them as if they were slugs or something.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

Maybe they approach you because they are not as intimidated by you as they are other girls, are clueless as to what league they are in and just approach anyone, or don't care much about rejection.


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## catcharay (Sep 15, 2011)

'Ugly men' have feelings too. It's a bit harsh. Do you know his personality?


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

Yea it is pretty harsh... You may see some as ugly, but even someone "hotter" than yourself may see them as far from it.

I would however say, certain people attract certain types....

Of course its not solidly the case and doesnt happen 100% of the time but iv noticed theres some things like asian men like "big women".

Perhaps "ugly" people (well the people that see themselves as ugly) have low self esteem and really want to be given a chance in a relationship, so dont have a type or a limit they think they can get (To people with that self esteem they dont think they can get anyone) and so would try with anyone to get in a relationship and be given a chance.

Personally....


I dont know why but some big women see me as their type (its always happened, pubs, clubs, online). Whilst I dont mind bigger women, some are just not to my taste. Perhaps its because im slim they like me, I dont know.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

Twelve Keyz said:


> This thread should just be locked. It's not going to go anywhere. As merryk said, this is just discouraging for any guys on here with low self-esteem. It's also pretty racist :no


It shouldn't be locked. People should have the right to have preferences and vent their frustrations. She never said anyone on here was ugly, those that are offended are offended because THEY, themselves, think they are ugly, not her. It's not her problem to fix their self-esteem.

Part of having good self-esteem is realizing everyone has different preferences and not taking it personally.


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

tea111red said:


> It shouldn't be locked. People should have the right to have preferences and vent their frustrations. She never said anyone on here was ugly, those that are offended are offended because THEY, themselves, think they are ugly, not her. It's not her problem to fix their self-esteem.


well I disagree. First, I don't think you'd say the same thing if this thread was about ugly girls. Second, the racism is totally unnecessary. She didn't even need to mention the guy's race. That's obviously going to offend people.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

tea111red said:


> It shouldn't be locked. People should have the right to have preferences and vent their frustrations. She never said anyone on here was ugly, those that are offended are offended because THEY, themselves, think they are ugly, not her. It's not her problem to fix their self-esteem.
> 
> Part of having good self-esteem is realizing everyone has different preferences and not taking it personally.


Pretty much this, though as I said before, some of her comments do border on racist.


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## youngloc (Dec 23, 2009)

maybe because the half decent men saw you for what you really are? while the less attractive ones tried to give you the benefit of the doubt


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

tea111red said:


> It shouldn't be locked. People should have the right to have preferences and vent their frustrations. She never said anyone on here was ugly, those that are offended are offended because THEY, themselves, think they are ugly, not her. It's not her problem to fix their self-esteem.
> 
> Part of having good self-esteem is realizing everyone has different preferences and not taking it personally.


I think the OP's attitude is what most here have a problem with, it's not like we're all taking it personally. I think monroee's post explains it well. It's not like people are saying she can't have preferences.



Monroee said:


> OP - How would you feel if you went up to a guy that you are actually attracted to, and he turned you down and had your attitude? "Ew, why's this girl asking me out, she's ugly and Asian". Yes, I threw in Asian, because you are acting that way towards Blacks and Hispanics. It's extremely cruel and shallow. Maybe if you switch the situation around and look at it that way - can you perhaps see why we all think your response is bad?


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

Poster said:


> I couldn't be bothered to read the entire thread, is the original poster still posting?


Yah...will respond to you all by tonight...


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## T-Bone (Oct 1, 2010)

Don't worry, this ugly guy won't be approaching you any time soon.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

tea111red said:


> Maybe they approach you because they are not as intimidated by you as they are other girls, are clueless as to what league they are in and just approach anyone, or don't care much about rejection.


FML.
I guess Asian girls in general aren't as intimidating compared to loud and opinionated white girls


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

catcharay said:


> 'Ugly men' have feelings too. It's a bit harsh. Do you know his personality?


Yes. he talks to me a lot in class...doesn't seem to have anything going for him. He always repeats what he says. so freaking annoying.
I hate guys who say the same things over and over again


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> FML.
> I guess Asian girls in general aren't as intimidating compared to loud and opinionated white girls


You seem quite opinionated, don't worry about that one.


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> Yes. he talks to me a lot in class...doesn't seem to have anything going for him. He always repeats what he says. so freaking annoying.
> I hate guys who say the same things over and over again


You...hate...them? You HATE them? You know what...I'm not even gonna bother.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

tea111red said:


> It shouldn't be locked. People should have the right to have preferences and vent their frustrations. She never said anyone on here was ugly, those that are offended are offended because THEY, themselves, think they are ugly, not her. It's not her problem to fix their self-esteem.
> 
> Part of having good self-esteem is realizing everyone has different preferences and not taking it personally.


Agreed. ^^^^


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

youngloc said:


> maybe because the half decent men saw you for what you really are? while the less attractive ones tried to give you the benefit of the doubt


I don't exactly understand what you're trying to say....


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

Twelve Keyz said:


> well I disagree. First, I don't think you'd say the same thing if this thread was about ugly girls. Second, the racism is totally unnecessary. She didn't even need to mention the guy's race. That's obviously going to offend people.


I couldn't care less about the guys on here who post about "ugly" girls. I have been on these boards for years and have seen those types of posts countless times, so I am immune to them and don't take them personally. The people who post those threads don't know what I look like either, so why would I take it personally? I realize people have their preferences, as well.

Regarding the "racism," I don't know for sure if it was her intent to come across that way. Maybe part of it was her trying to be descriptive to give readers a visual, but some of her true thoughts came out in the process, due to built up frustration (which tends to happen to everyone - true thoughts come out in times out frustration/anger). That is really for her to say, though.

I think her making this thread was not necessarily a bad thing because maybe it gave her some insight and opened her eyes a little bit. Perhaps, it will help her tone down her "attitude" or change her beliefs. Without the discussion that has gone on here, this may never have been a possibility. Maybe there will be even more insight for her to gain from future posts that can help her, too. Closing the thread would prevent this, though, and that is why I disagree w/ it needing to be closed.

Also, other people reading this thread can probably gain some insight about themselves and others from seeing her as an example.


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

This thread intrigues me.


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## applesauce5482 (Apr 26, 2012)

ManOfFewWords said:


> Not girls with your attitude


exactly what i was thinking haha


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## thing (May 17, 2012)

Maybe these ugly guys approach you because they think you're within their 'league', so they think they have a better chance with you, than with a girl that's more attractive? Any way I think about it, I can't see why you'd be more offended than flattered, unless you think of an 'ugly' person as less of a person.


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

tea111red said:


> Regarding the "racism," I don't know for sure if it was her intent to come across that way. Maybe part of it was her trying to be descriptive to give readers a visual, but some of her true thoughts came out in the process, due to built up frustration (which tends to happen to everyone - true thoughts come out in times out frustration/anger). That is really for her to say, though.
> 
> I think her making this thread was not necessarily a bad thing because maybe it gave her some insight and opened her eyes a little bit. Perhaps, it will help her tone down her "attitude" or change her beliefs. Without the discussion that has gone on here, this may never have been a possibility. Maybe there will be even more insight for her to gain from future posts that can help her, too. Closing the thread would prevent this, though, and that is why I disagree w/ it needing to be closed.
> 
> Also, other people reading this thread can probably gain some insight about themselves and others from seeing her as an example.


you have a good point about how this thread might provide insight, but I think I'm going to just dismiss her as a racist. It's very evident in the way she talks about people.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

Twelve Keyz said:


> you have a good point about how this thread might provide insight, but after reading this post:
> 
> I think I'm going to just dismiss her as a racist. It's very evident in the way she talks about people.


Hmm, well, maybe it all comes down to the wording of her sentences and her trying to give the reader a visual? Like others have said, it's probably just a lack of tact, but I guess everyone has their moments of that. I don't think she's racist against white people since she seems to want to attract white guys. She even implied some hispanics are attractive, too.


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## Primordial Loop (Apr 5, 2011)

Twelve Keyz said:


> I think I'm going to just dismiss her as a racist. It's very evident in the way she talks about people.


I wouldn't go that far. More than likely she's just a bad a troll. I mean c'mon... It's pretty obvious that she's trying to provoke responses now.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

Hmm I attract creepy guys (off personalities, perverts, etc.) more than just an ugly guy that has a regular personality. Personally I rather have the latter. It IS nice to be approached by regular guys regardless of their personalities. It's happened a few times and I'm flattered even if I'm not interested in them.

I'm Asian and attract mostly Hispanic guys and sometimes white guys (only the ones that aren't my type). I don't think I've attracted a guy of any other race before. I am Asian like you so I don't know. It just depends where you are at what place and time that a random guy somehow likes you.


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## sweetluvgurl (Jul 9, 2012)

I don't think you should be judging someone by their looks so much. You may really be missing out. You don't wanna be judged on your SA and other things, I'm sure. Maybe you should take the same consideration for those "ugly guys."


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## lonelyjew (Jan 20, 2010)

ilovemusic89 said:


> I don't exactly understand what you're trying to say....


Well, if you're even a real person and not a troll, he means that if the self entitled, spoiled, and superficial attitude you're displaying in this thread is visible to guys around you, the attractive ones might not want to approach you. I disagree with this. You're in high school right? Generally speaking, most of them will be thinking in a similarly shallow manner, and if you're cute things like your attitude won't phase them. Thing is though, in high school, the vast majority of guys are still really nervous about approaching women in general. Give it time, and you might find a person who's as beautiful and shallow as you, and you can spend your time marveling at each others beauty and looking down your noses at everyone else when you're not having stupid high school relationship fights.

BTW, even though I'm calling you shallow, I do want to say that it's ok to be shallow in high school; I just hope that as you continue to grow, you'll begin to see that there is a lot more to people than simply their looks. Also, it's perfectly ok to not be physically attracted to certain people, whether they be fat, or hispanic, or whatever. I personally generally don't find black girls attractive physically; I can find their personalities attractive and I don't think negatively of them as people, I just tend not to be attracted to them. We don't have the luxury of choosing what we're attracted to, so there is no sense in being ashamed of what you have no control over.

Seriously, I hope you're not a troll.......


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

lonelyjew said:


> Well, if you're even a real person and not a troll, he means that if the self entitled, spoiled, and superficial attitude you're displaying in this thread is visible to guys around you, the attractive ones might not want to approach you. I disagree with this. You're in high school right? Generally speaking, most of them will be thinking in a similarly shallow manner, and if you're cute things like your attitude won't phase them. Thing is though, in high school, the vast majority of guys are still really nervous about approaching women in general. Give it time, and you might find a person who's as beautiful and shallow as you, and you can spend your time marveling at each others beauty and looking down your noses at everyone else when you're not having stupid high school relationship fights.
> 
> BTW, even though I'm calling you shallow, I do want to say that it's ok to be shallow in high school; I just hope that as you continue to grow, you'll begin to see that there is a lot more to people than simply their looks. Also, it's perfectly ok to not be physically attracted to certain people, whether they be fat, or hispanic, or whatever. I personally generally don't find black girls attractive physically; I can find their personalities attractive and I don't think negatively of them as people, I just tend not to be attracted to them. We don't have the luxury of choosing what we're attracted to, so there is no sense in being ashamed of what you have no control over.
> 
> Seriously, I hope you're not a troll.......


Um, I'm really not trolling. 
And I'm in college, not High School, if you look at my age...(23)


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## VIncymon (Apr 16, 2009)

Only the white man is handsome ?
wow. just wow.

and they said white-supremacy-type-racism was dead.


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

ilovemusic89 said:


> Do any of you have problems attracting the unattractive folks?


Try not to take this the wrong way, but I remember there was a study done that showed people of similar attraction levels were more likely to approach one another. I have a similar problem with attracting people that I'm not attracted to so I'm not trying to be mean. What it says to me is that I probably have to work on other things besides my body in order to attract someone that I'm actually attracted to. Some examples would be clothes, body language, and personality which is the main one since SA hinders it severely.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

shyvr6 said:


> Try not to take this the wrong way, but I remember there was a study done that showed people of similar attraction levels were more likely to approach one another. I have a similar problem with attracting people that I'm not attracted to so I'm not trying to be mean. What it says to me is that I probably have to work on other things besides my body in order to attract someone that I'm actually attracted to. Some examples would be clothes, body language, and personality which is the main one since SA hinders it severely.


trust me, I do everything that i can control to my utmost capacity-as in wearing flattering feminine clothes, putting on makeup, doing my hair, controlling my weight, and everything else possible.
i still get approached by mainly hispanic and black men in class or in public.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

ilovemusic89 said:


> trust me, I do everything that i can control to my utmost capacity-as in wearing flattering feminine clothes, putting on makeup, doing my hair, controlling my weight, and everything else possible.
> i still get approached by mainly hispanic and black men in class or in public.


What's wrong with being approached by those guys? As long as they're not perverts or treating you bad.


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## Black And Mild (Apr 11, 2011)

A simple solution would be for you to start approaching yourself.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

Black And Mild said:


> A simple solution would be for you to start approaching yourself.


That's what I did and that's when it started to go somewhere. Sometimes you just have no choice, but to do the approaching if you're not getting the guys you want from them approaching you.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> trust me, I do everything that i can control to my utmost capacity-as in wearing flattering feminine clothes, putting on makeup, doing my hair, controlling my weight, and everything else possible.
> i still get approached by mainly hispanic and black men in class or in public.


Now, THIS is something worth jumping on her for because this is racist as ****.


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

I have a few answers

1) The percentage of ugly people is way higher than beautiful people

2) Attractive men have high standards and rarely need to approach strangers, besides approaching strangers is far more risky than waiting for the goods to come to them. Faces possible rejection, blow to self esteem etc. Weigh the pros and cons.

3) Depending on the race/nationality some have higher libido/sex drive than others, which causes them to approach more often


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## Black And Mild (Apr 11, 2011)

Peter Attis said:


> Now, THIS is something worth jumping on her for because this is racist as ****.


Uhh, _all_ of her posts were racist as **** lol


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## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

Perhaps you attract people you're most like?


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## shelbster18 (Oct 8, 2011)

I'd be flattered to get a compliment from any guy in real life.


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## shelbster18 (Oct 8, 2011)

StrangetoBehold said:


> I'm more inclined to feel flattered when someone admits their attraction for me, so I never consider it to be a problem if I'm approached by a man who I don't happen to find attractive. This is certainly not the sort of event that would ruin my day or make it worse. They are people too. They deserve love as much as the next person. _At least_ you're being approached. I say kudos to them for having the courage to do what others do not. Maybe you should ask out these decent looking intelligent guys you speak of.


I completely agree with this. Not that I've ever been approached by a guy but it would make me feel good no matter who it was.


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## Earl of Lemongrab (May 15, 2012)

ilovemusic89 said:


> trust me, I do everything that i can control to my utmost capacity-as in wearing flattering feminine clothes, putting on makeup, doing my hair, controlling my weight, and everything else possible.
> i still get approached by mainly hispanic and black men in class or in public.


You're still not getting it, are you?
It's your personality that turns off those so-called 'hot' white guys that you're after. Not your looks.
Also, why do you have to keep mentioning black and hispanic guys as if they're somehow lesser humans. Race is something that nobody has control over, it's completely stupid to degrade other people for things that are beyond their control. As long as you keep up this extremely immature and racist attitude, you'll _never _attract anyone who's considered to be intelligent and attractive in your view.


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

This thread and OP. :bash


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## ShadyGFX (Jul 18, 2012)

I don't mean to judge but that's kind of mean. Really you should take it as a compliment.


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## Brandeezy (Dec 23, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> trust me, I do everything that i can control to my utmost capacity-as in wearing flattering feminine clothes, putting on makeup, doing my hair, controlling my weight, and everything else possible.
> i still get approached by mainly hispanic and black men in class or in public.


So you're basically saying that Hispanic and Black men only date women who don't wear feminine clothes or make-up, don't do their hair, and are overweight right?


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

Brandeezy said:


> So you're basically saying that Hispanic and Black men only date women who don't wear feminine clothes or make-up, don't do their hair, and are overweight right?


Lol she's saying that even when she looks feminine the Hispanic and black guys still hit on her.


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## lonelyjew (Jan 20, 2010)

ilovemusic89 said:


> Um, I'm really not trolling.
> And I'm in college, not High School, if you look at my age...(23)


LOL, my bad, your age doesn't appear under your name to me. Sorry if you're offended, but honestly, the way you think is pretty immature and something I'd have expected out of a high schooler. That isn't to say it's abnormal, some people remain immature and shallow their entire lives, but I think that isn't a good thing and it might be good for you to make a concerted effort to change your basic outlook on this (and probably other) thing(s). If you look good, you shouldn't have too many problems getting men to notice you, but any decent/mature guy would find your attitude unattractive.



ilovemusic89 said:


> trust me, I do everything that i can control to my utmost capacity-as in wearing flattering feminine clothes, putting on makeup, doing my hair, controlling my weight, and everything else possible.
> i still get approached by mainly hispanic and black men in class or in public.


First, lets start with a good possibility: You'd be surprised how many cute guys are shy, in spite of their looks. If you are really good looking, then this adds to the problem, because good looking girls can be very intimidating to approach. In my experience, at least in regards to dealing with women, black and hispanic people tend to be a lot less shy and a lot less afraid of being shot down. I think some people already suggested it, but maybe you should be proactive and approach the guys you're attracted to. You don't have to ask them out or anything, but just make conversation.

The second possibility isn't quite so good: Maybe this speaks volumes over how you make yourself appear. Obviously I can't say a thing because I've never seen you, but speaking as a white guy (though whether I'm cute enough to warrant you caring my opinion is questionable), I personally don't find girls who are overly made up, or dress too provocatively, attractive. Well, I find them attractive physically, but appearance often speaks quite a bit about a person, and if you're overdoing it, generally it says that you're the sort of person I probably would prefer to only look at rather than talk to. Call me judgmental, but I when I see a girl who's overdoing it, the first place my mind goes to is _5lut_ and that is not something you want people labeling you as. Anyways, maybe you could try lightening up on the makeup and wear clothes that are cute, but not overly showy.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

lonelyjew said:


> LOL, my bad, your age doesn't appear under your name to me. Sorry if you're offended, but honestly, the way you think is pretty immature and something I'd have expected out of a high schooler. That isn't to say it's abnormal, some people remain immature and shallow their entire lives, but I think that isn't a good thing and it might be good for you to make a concerted effort to change your basic outlook on this (and probably other) thing(s). If you look good, you shouldn't have too many problems getting men to notice you, but any decent/mature guy would find your attitude unattractive.
> 
> First, lets start with a good possibility: You'd be surprised how many cute guys are shy, in spite of their looks. If you are really good looking, then this adds to the problem, because good looking girls can be very intimidating to approach. In my experience, at least in regards to dealing with women, black and hispanic people tend to be a lot less shy and a lot less afraid of being shot down. I think some people already suggested it, but maybe you should be proactive and approach the guys you're attracted to. You don't have to ask them out or anything, but just make conversation.
> 
> The second possibility isn't quite so good: Maybe this speaks volumes over how you make yourself appear. Obviously I can't say a thing because I've never seen you, but speaking as a white guy (though whether I'm cute enough to warrant you caring my opinion is questionable), I personally don't find girls who are overly made up, or dress too provocatively, attractive. Well, I find them attractive physically, but appearance often speaks quite a bit about a person, and if you're overdoing it, generally it says that you're the sort of person I probably would prefer to only look at rather than talk to. Call me judgmental, but I when I see a girl who's overdoing it, the first place my mind goes to is _5lut_ and that is not something you want people labeling you as. Anyways, maybe you could try lightening up on the makeup and wear clothes that are cute, but not overly showy.


Hehe all the Hispanic guys I knew were shy and/or not loud/outgoing. The white guys I knew were somewhat more outgoing and loud. Except for the white guys I dated they were more laid back and quiet, but that's another story.


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

trisquel said:


> OP makes a strong advocate for eugenics.
> Sweetie, let's hope you never procreate and pass your ridiculous racist beliefs on to your children too.


this is mean... but I agree :lol

Does that make me a bad person?


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## blc1 (Jan 8, 2009)

hehe. I'm hispanic and shy. I generally find many of us suffer from inferiority complexes, the colonial inferiority complex maybe?


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## Earl of Lemongrab (May 15, 2012)

Twelve Keyz said:


> this is mean... but I agree :lol


Good thing she doesn't live anywhere in the GTA, right? :lol


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

**** THREAD ADVISORY ****

*Keep the hostility in check, please. There are also some rather concerning comments surrounding race in here. Refer to the forum guidelines and control it, **or this thread will be shut down**:*



> *Personal attacks on any member of this community will not be tolerated. Any post, which is judged by the moderators to be defamatory, degrading, threatening, humiliating, insulting or hurtful in any way to another member of the community, will be edited or deleted at the moderators' discretion. Antagonizing or demeaning language that isn't necessarily directed at any individual may also be considered unacceptable.*


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

trisquel said:


> Good thing she doesn't live anywhere in the GTA, right? :lol


LOL yup :lol


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## BrianMook (Dec 14, 2009)

How dare these short ugly minorities, ask out such a kind and beautiful person like the OP

HOW DARE THEY!!!!


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## Earl of Lemongrab (May 15, 2012)

BrianMook said:


> How dare these short ugly minorities, ask out such a kind and beautiful person like the OP
> 
> HOW DARE THEY!!!!


^best reply so far


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

The OP is a minority too if you want to get technical.


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

BrianMook said:


> How dare these short ugly minorities, ask out such a kind and beautiful person like the OP
> 
> HOW DARE THEY!!!!


:lol


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Is your community college in the ghetto? Guys in the ghetto are generally more aggressive (especially in the NYC area from what I hear).


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## ManOfFewWords (Mar 20, 2012)

BrianMook said:


> How dare these short ugly minorities, ask out such a kind and beautiful person like the OP
> 
> HOW DARE THEY!!!!


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

Oh God, just let the damn thread die already. We're just giving OP the attention she wants.


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## saltyleaf (Dec 30, 2011)

ManOfFewWords said:


> Not girls with your attitude


what he said.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

Twelve Keyz said:


> Oh God, just let the damn thread die already. OP is just getting the attention she wants.


:tiptoe away...


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## saltyleaf (Dec 30, 2011)

BrianMook said:


> How dare these short ugly minorities, ask out such a kind and beautiful person like the OP
> 
> HOW DARE THEY!!!!


:rofl


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## Thinkerbell (Jul 8, 2012)

rednosereindeer said:


> Dang, I wish people were as offended as this when someone was making a commentary about ugly/unattractive girls.


:clap


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

So what race would the OP prefer?


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## ImWeird (Apr 26, 2010)

Hey! Don't hate on my ugly guy brethren.


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## orbero (Jul 20, 2012)

“I have an important message to deliver to all the cute people all over the world. If you're out there and you're cute, maybe you're beautiful. I just want to tell you somethin' — there's more of us UGLY MOTHER****ERS than you are, hey-y, so watch out.”


― Frank Zappa


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## enzo (May 30, 2011)

Lol.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

The people that are making a big spectacle over the OP's comments and taking them personally, instead of offering her constructive criticism (assuming she is not a troll) to help her figure out her problem is what has caused a lot of this thread to go haywire. The OP has been personally attacked over and over by several members in this thread already, and I don't see how that is any better than the comments she's made regarding the type of people she attracts.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

tea111red said:


> The people that are making a big spectacle over the OP's comments and taking them personally, instead of offering her constructive criticism (assuming she is not a troll) to help her figure out her problem is what has caused a lot of this thread to go haywire. The OP has been personally attacked over and over by several members in this thread already, and I don't see how that is any better than the comments she's made regarding the type of people she attracts.


Great point.


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## Milco (Dec 12, 2009)

ImWeird said:


> Hey! Don't hate on my ugly guy brethren.


You're gorgeous, babe! Trés magnifique. ;D
We both know I'm the ugly one.. and quite possibly the creepy one as well :um :b


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## ShadyGFX (Jul 18, 2012)

3...2...1....Que the mods lol


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## DesperateOne (Feb 6, 2012)

That's why I never approach girls...


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

Milco said:


> You're gorgeous, babe! Trés magnifique. ;D
> We both know I'm the ugly one.. and quite possibly the creepy one as well :um :b


Lol I make fun of my fiancé for looking creepy, but really I do find him sexy and hot. So maybe a girl will find your creepiness sexy too. :lol


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

ilovemusic89 said:


> He's shorter than me for goodnes sakes and im not too fond of short hispanic guys, neither is my mother... In fact she says she will disown me if i happen to date a black or hispanic guy...serious.


So much wrong with this post. :no


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

ilovemusic89 said:


> No im not unbelievably judgemental, but based on my family's income level and the time and amt of money i spend on clothes and the time that it takes me in the morning to get ready for class, i would expect at least more "average looking and averagely intelligent" guys to show interest in me.


guys don't care about any of that.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

shelbster18 said:


> I'd be flattered to get a compliment from any guy in real life.


I'm always worried that complimenting attractive girls will make me look shallow and they will be annoyed by the unwanted attention.


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## nemesis1 (Dec 21, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> Today, if I was not having a bad day already, a really stocky and short Hispanic guy in my class asked me out for a drink. This kind of lowered my self esteem and made me feel really ugly.
> 
> Do any of you have problems attracting the unattractive folks?
> The decent looking intelligent guys seem to look, but they never approach.
> ...


Maybe they think you are also unattractive so would be easy to get a date with?


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

arnie said:


> I'm always worried that complimenting attractive girls will make me look shallow and they will be annoyed by the unwanted attention.


Really ?


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

nemesis1 said:


> maybe they think you are also unattractive so would be easy to get a date with?


maybe.


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## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

ilovemusic89 said:


> These guys probly dot have any inner beauty... They can barely speak in a coherent manner...


Ugh. :sigh


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## BrookeHannigan (Mar 29, 2012)

earlgreytea said:


> I disagree. But maybe that's because I don't have that mindset? Plus, *I think average looking guys have more of a chance with attractive girls than average looking girls have with attractive guys.*


 :haha :haha :haha

and this comes from a ugly person that even could date attractive guys when she was absolutely fat


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## OldSchoolSkater (Jun 3, 2011)

Crazy. There is another thread on here talking about women who get frustrated when a guy they aren't attracted to asks them out or approaches them. I've seen it happen several times, they get all defensive and act like "What the hell was he thinking trying to talk to me?" It's a huge turn off ladies - your looks can be a 10 but if I see you act like this I really have no respect for you. 

So, OP, want to elaborate on why this bothers you so much? Shouldn't you just say you are flattered but you aren't interested and move on? Aren't you flattered that guys approach you? I know there are several women on these forums that would appreciate the effort of any guy who approached them. I know I would appreciate the effort of any woman who approached me, regardless if I found them attractive or not. 

Also, keep in mind that it's scary for most people to approach someone they are actually interested in. It's the guys out there that hit on every single girl that doesn't seem to be nervous because they do it several times a day and have been shot down nearly as much.


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## OldSchoolSkater (Jun 3, 2011)

ilovemusic89 said:


> No im not unbelievably judgemental, but based on my family's income level and the time and amt of money i spend on clothes and the time that it takes me in the morning to get ready for class, i would expect at least more "average looking and averagely intelligent" guys to show interest in me.


So let me see if I follow your thought process here:

1. You have a large family income
2. You spend a lot of that money on clothes and make up.
3. You spend a large amount of time getting ready for class, while others are wearing sweatpants and hoodies.
4. You go from saying that you weren't attracted to these guys that asked you out to saying that you had expected to attract "averagely intelligent guys," what this says to me is that you assume a guy who you aren't attracted to isn't intelligent.

So with all of these things you would assume you could attract good looking smart men? Hmm. Have you tried not putting off a stuck up vibe?

My opinion: Change your attitude.


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## Durzo (Jun 4, 2011)

christ.....:sus

So you are upset that "ugly" guys give you attention and not the guys you want to? Brilliant.
As for the solution either you can approach the guys you are attracted to and grow some balls, or you should stop whining about it.

Maybe the guys who you consider attractive consider you ugly too so they do not approach.


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## fetisha (Jan 13, 2012)

I'm not defending her but guys don't like when ugly fat girls approach them either. Most of them still prefer skinny women or fat women. they don't care how nice the ugly/fat chicks are to them. It seems like guys always want to bash women and get offended for being shallow but thy are just as shallow as women.


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## nycdude (Mar 20, 2010)

Maybe he just wants to be friends, nothing else. Can u be at least friends?


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## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

EVery single girl attracts ugly men. I also attract ugly men and it really doesn't do anything for my self esteem. Everywhere I go I receive unwanted attention from them and mostly they act like pigs around me. It's the ones who act all gross which I don't like but as long as they are respectful and behave like gentlemen ( not being so obvious that they are looking at me as a sex object) then I will respect them back, but if they don't, then that's when I either give them a mean look or ignore them.


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## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

fetisha said:


> I'm not defending her but guys don't like when ugly fat girls approach them either. Most of them still prefer skinny women or fat women. they don't care how nice the ugly/fat chicks are to them. It seems like guys always want to bash women and get offended for being shallow but thy are just as shallow as women.


Agreed.


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## Durzo (Jun 4, 2011)

fetisha said:


> I'm not defending her but guys don't like when ugly fat girls approach them either. Most of them still prefer skinny women or fat women. they don't care how nice the ugly/fat chicks are to them. It seems like guys always want to bash women and get offended for being shallow but thy are just as shallow as women.


It isn't about gender....

It is about this person taking her frustration for not being approached by people she deems attractive out on herself and "ugly" men who come on to her. Nobody should complain about somebody hitting on them because of superficial reasons, but rather the way the guys/girls go about it.

I would equally bash any male who complained about "fat" girls hitting on him and not the hot girls he is into.

Someone being "ugly" to you is not grounds to complain that they should not waste your time by trying to ask you out or get with you. It may not boost your confidence or self esteem, but that is no reason to complain about it just because YOU do not get anything out of it. It may surprise you but others have their own desires to fulfil too, and by approaching you they are trying to fulfil their own not yours. If you do the approaching and get turned down, then you can complain but even so it isn't a reason to generalise in the future or stereotype because of how people look.

The OP of this thread clearly does not deserve the attention of any male or female until she changes her attitude and learns that other people have lives and egos separate to her own.

Like I said, she should approach the guys she likes and grow some balls, or at the very least learn some manners and respect.


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## BrookeHannigan (Mar 29, 2012)

fetisha said:


> I'm not defending her .but* guys don't like when* ugly* fat girls approach them either*,* Most of them still prefer* skinny women _*or fat women*._ they don't care how nice the ugly/fat chicks are to them. It seems like guys always want to bash women and get offended for being shallow but thy are just as shallow as women.


huh? :sus I dont get it.
and besides ugly and fat is all subjective,
I have heard people call Mika Nakashima fat....and she weighs like 38 kg.


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## MrQuiet76 (Aug 26, 2011)

so it's that embarrassing to be asked out by an unattractive guy that it ruins your day??... no wonder i don't ask any ****in women out anymore


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## XxArmyofOnexX (Aug 13, 2007)

erasercrumbs said:


> +1 Cynicism
> 
> Thank you, internet.


Your cynicism has increased to level: Dr. House


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

I don't get why the OP dosn't like short guys. A guy can't do anything about his height. It's not some character defect. Lots of women don't like short guys. It doesn't make sense to me.


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## Strwbrry (Jun 28, 2012)

Really?

I would be flattered if someone asked me.. If some men act like jerks around "ugly" women, we don't have to do the same thing to "ugly men". 
True clichés:
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Everyone deserves a shot at love.

Faith in humanity is destroyed. Again.


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## fetisha (Jan 13, 2012)

BrookeHannigan said:


> huh? :sus I dont get it.
> and besides ugly and fat is all subjective,
> I have heard people call Mika Nakashima fat....and she weighs like 38 kg.


Just saying some guys still are picky about a woman's appearance thinking they have look perfect just like some girls are


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

scarpia said:


> I don't get why the OP dosn't like short guys. A guy can't do anything about his height. It's not some character defect. Lots of women don't like short guys. It doesn't make sense to me.


As a good looking (from what women have said) short guy, I find that my social anxiety and social awkwardness are a much big barrier than my height. So as long as you are taller than the girl, it doesn't seem to be a detriment. Though every once in awhile you see a 5 foot pixie girl who only dates guys 5'10"+ or even 6'+ and that irritates me.


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## ilovemusic89 (Apr 30, 2012)

nycdude said:


> Maybe he just wants to be friends, nothing else. Can u be at least friends?


No he specifically asked me out for a drink. And its obvious he's attracted.. He compliments me and is flirty ... I wish he'd just leave me alone... SO ANNOYING


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## awfulness (Jul 13, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> No he specifically asked me out for a drink. And its obvious he's attracted.. He compliments me and is flirty ... I wish he'd just leave me alone... SO ANNOYING


did you let him know you're not attracted to him so he can stop wasting his time and effort on you and move on to a girl who's actually attracted to him?

or do you secretly enjoy the attention more than you're letting on?


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

ilovemusic89 said:


> No he specifically asked me out for a drink. And its obvious he's attracted.. He compliments me and is flirty ... I wish he'd just leave me alone... SO ANNOYING


Usually women just say they have a bf and that ends it. It's pretty simple.


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

scarpia said:


> I don't get why the OP dosn't like short guys. A guy can't do anything about his height. It's not some character defect. Lots of women don't like short guys. It doesn't make sense to me.


My one "boyfriend" I had in the past was about the same height as me. I am 5'3, he might have been 5'4. Him being short wasn't a big deal to me. His other qualities, both physical and personality, completely took the stage more. So yeah, I agree with you, I don't think it makes sense for a woman to focus too much on a guy's height. There is so much more to a person than their height.


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## au Lait (Sep 8, 2010)

Ignoring the fact that this is an obvious troll thread... we have a crap ton of threads on here filled with male posters judging and rating women based on looks. Threads where guys mention using women who they rate as "3" on the looks scale for sex. Threads where guys discuss how ugly women don't intimidate them. No one bats an eye.

And then a girl dares to mention that a guy she finds ugly tried talking to her, and suddenly it's a huge scandal filled with male posters telling her what a terrible person she is, criticizing her for not liking short men, etc.


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

au Lait said:


> No one bats an eye.


Maybe you've seen more threads where this happens, but all the ones that I've seen usually turn into gender fights and most end up getting locked, so I don't see the irony.


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## fetisha (Jan 13, 2012)

scarpia said:


> Usually women just say they have a bf and that ends it. It's pretty simple.


not always cause sometimes the guy will continues to pester her and think he will be better for her :roll


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## fetisha (Jan 13, 2012)

au Lait said:


> Ignoring the fact that this is an obvious troll thread... we have a crap ton of threads on here filled with male posters judging and rating women based on looks. Threads where guys mention using women who they rate as "3" on the looks scale for sex. Threads where guys discuss how ugly women don't intimidate them. No one bats an eye.
> 
> And then a girl dares to mention that a guy she finds ugly tried talking to her, and suddenly it's a huge scandal filled with male posters telling her what a terrible person she is, criticizing her for not liking short men, etc.


So glad you said this, thank you!


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

au Lait said:


> Ignoring the fact that this is an obvious troll thread... we have a crap ton of threads on here filled with male posters judging and rating women based on looks. Threads where guys mention using women who they rate as "3" on the looks scale for sex. Threads where guys discuss how ugly women don't intimidate them. No one bats an eye.
> 
> And then a girl dares to mention that a guy she finds ugly tried talking to her, and suddenly it's a huge scandal filled with male posters telling her what a terrible person she is, criticizing her for not liking short men, etc.


I know a person that does that hah. Rating women on looks. I'm not gonna name any names though.


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## gaz (Jun 27, 2008)

Oh dear!:no I only hope that all women do not have the same mindset as the op. Most guys on this site obviously have problems approaching women and the op's thread is only feeding insecurities which we already have.


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## 87Daniel (Jun 9, 2012)

I hate this digital age ... I tried wiping my *** with this thread, now I have to clean the screen.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

scarpia said:


> I don't get why the OP dosn't like short guys. A guy can't do anything about his height. It's not some character defect. Lots of women don't like short guys. It doesn't make sense to me.


It doesn't matter if you can change it or not. You can't change your face either but people care about the face a lot. (Makeup can only do so much.)

I keep seeing on this forum guys saying it's okay to not like fat women (supposedly because you can lose weight) but it's not okay to not like short men. I think it's total bull.


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## Quinn the Eskimo (Jan 22, 2012)

don't worry, we all attract ugly men at some point in our lives, even me


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## BKrakow (Jul 8, 2010)

au Lait said:


> Ignoring the fact that this is an obvious troll thread... we have a crap ton of threads on here filled with male posters judging and rating women based on looks. Threads where guys mention using women who they rate as "3" on the looks scale for sex. Threads where guys discuss how ugly women don't intimidate them. No one bats an eye.
> 
> And then a girl dares to mention that a guy she finds ugly tried talking to her, and suddenly it's a huge scandal filled with male posters telling her what a terrible person she is, criticizing her for not liking short men, etc.


ah! now we see the violence inherent in the system.


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## Andre (Feb 27, 2004)

It would be good if everyone took a step back, stopped posting all at once, and thought about what is actually going on here.


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## pbandjam (Sep 24, 2011)

I think it has to do with karma. You did terrible things in your previous lives so now they've come back to haunt you. Ugly people did bad things as well so now they've become unattractive in this life. Its just the circle of life really. So try to be good human being in this life so you can get models in your next one.

/sarcasm lmfao sorry i have no idea why.

Either way the more you feel like you want men who are attractive the more anxious you're going to feel, and the more worried you'll be about chances with your potential mates. Ease up bud. Act natural and what's meant to happen will happen.


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## shelbster18 (Oct 8, 2011)

scarpia said:


> I don't get why the OP dosn't like short guys. A guy can't do anything about his height. It's not some character defect. Lots of women don't like short guys. It doesn't make sense to me.


I used to have a crush in 7th grade on this short guy. He got into trouble a lot and he got on most people's nerves.  I thought he was so cute.


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## XxArmyofOnexX (Aug 13, 2007)

au Lait said:


> Ignoring the fact that this is an obvious troll thread... we have a crap ton of threads on here filled with male posters judging and rating women based on looks. Threads where guys mention using women who they rate as "3" on the looks scale for sex. Threads where guys discuss how ugly women don't intimidate them. *No one bats an eye.*
> 
> And then a girl dares to mention that a guy she finds ugly tried talking to her, and suddenly it's a huge scandal filled with male posters telling her what a terrible person she is, criticizing her for not liking short men, etc.


I'd have to disagree with the bolded part. I've seen many threads were said posters were told they were making generalizations / inappropriate judgements. Male posters get called out. Female posters get called out, everyone gets called out, then mods swoop in like an orchestrated SWAT team and lock everything down. I do agree about the ratio being out of whack though. The other thing I've noticed, certain posters of this forum seem to ignore their thread being locked (as if its a minor thing) and just recreate the thread but in a different wording or a few days later. Doesn't SAS have some sort of warning system in place? Perhaps the punishment should be more severe...

With that being said:

Come on guys, don't turn this place into PoF, can't we all just get along?


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## akeanureevess (Apr 15, 2011)

ilovemusic89 said:


> Today, if I was not having a bad day already, a really stocky and short Hispanic guy in my class asked me out for a drink. This kind of lowered my self esteem and made me feel really ugly.
> 
> Do any of you have problems attracting the unattractive folks?
> The decent looking intelligent guys seem to look, but they never approach.
> ...


you wouldnt have to worry about me hitting on you because shallow girls=turned off. im a guy and im not even shallow enough to be like i only like blondes with huge tits and a nice ***. anything less and i might tolerate if if they are ok looking


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

In what way is he annoying you? If you're not interested, just say so. Don't lead him on... Really if you don't like the attention you would've done something by now.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

**** Thread Lock ****

This blew up again.



Just Lurking said:


> *Keep the hostility in check, please. There are also some rather concerning comments surrounding race in here. Refer to the forum guidelines and control it, **or this thread will be shut down**:*
> 
> 
> > *Personal attacks on any member of this community will not be tolerated. Any post, which is judged by the moderators to be defamatory, degrading, threatening, humiliating, insulting or hurtful in any way to another member of the community, will be edited or deleted at the moderators' discretion. Antagonizing or demeaning language that isn't necessarily directed at any individual may also be considered unacceptable.*


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