# ECT Log, for anyone interested. (Electro Convulsive Therapy)



## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

Decided to do this because I really had no other options and my depression was getting pretty bad (suicidal ideation, self harm).

It's a little more evolved than what it usually depicted in film. Two scenes that come to mind are from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and Requiem for a Dream.

I've done 4 treatments so far. It's spaced out Monday Wednesday Friday.
_
Diagnosed with SAD, OCD, and now MDD._
*
Notable changes so far:*

1) Had a wet dream and woke up with a rock hard erection one day. (Hasn't happened in a long time.)
2) Started a job training, however due to this treatment I still have not heard back from the employer if they are going to continue working with me.
3) Hit the gym pretty hard twice. Haven't been in a year and near the end of that phase my workouts were pretty weak and lazy.
4) Signed up for a martial arts class nearby on MeetUp.com (we'll see if I go).
5) Been working on some of my art and trying to figure out ways to sell it.
6) Talked to an attractive woman on Skype while being completely sober.
*
Negatives Still Persisting:*

- Nicotine Dependence
- Marijuana usage (although I have an Rx in state of CA, it sometimes feels like an escape, that or I have to use it for insomnia)
- Still have SA and lack of desire to socialize most of the time (except for online chat rooms).
- Appetite seems low lately.
- Can't think of many other negatives, my anxiety has just been bothering me due to several issues going on in my life.
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Other things of note:*

I started 45 mg Nardil a few weeks prior to ECT.
Nurse said serious improvement usually occurs after the 7th treatment.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

O, cool. My doctor's have been recommending this for a while.


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## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

Have done 8 sessions over about 3 weeks. I feel the depression lifting for sure. Anxiety is still a problem however, but it's more because I'm realizing how much in disarray my life is. Definately got a long way to go for recovery.

I've cut down on smoking, returned to the gym and worked out better than I have in a while, and pursued a couple job interviews.

I just need to keep pushing and start fixing things.


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## Gojira (Jun 1, 2015)

Please update us in this thread on your progress. It sounds promising  Stimulated parts of your brain long silenced by depression.


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## dcooperlpc (Sep 21, 2015)

valyriansteel said:


> Have done 8 sessions over about 3 weeks. I feel the depression lifting for sure. Anxiety is still a problem however, but it's more because I'm realizing how much in disarray my life is. Definately got a long way to go for recovery.
> 
> I've cut down on smoking, returned to the gym and worked out better than I have in a while, and pursued a couple job interviews.
> 
> I just need to keep pushing and start fixing things.


that's interesting. ECT does have a bad reputation, but as you've said, a lot of that is based on movies and popular culture. I imagine it was much less refined back in the day, and I'm glad you've found that it's been helping. Have you noticed any issues with memory. It's kind of been the big knock against it.


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## mjkittredge (Sep 8, 2012)

notice any problems with memory loss? I've heard that can be an issue with this type of treatment


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## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

mjkittredge said:


> notice any problems with memory loss? I've heard that can be an issue with this type of treatment


It is not as dramatic as I had thought.

My short term memory is a bit fuzzy, but I was using alcohol and drugs prior to treatment, which was doing the same thing to my memory anyways.

I thought I'd lose some of my identity or something, but it really isn't like that. It's worth it if you are dealing with serious depression.

I still have anxiety though, it doesn't really do anything for that. I think UltraShy was wondering about this.

The anxiety is more pronounced though, my theory is that it is because I am sobering up and the ECT is allowing me to see how much in disarray my life is. So if anything the anxiety is causing me to get my act together.


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## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

dcooperlpc said:


> that's interesting. ECT does have a bad reputation, but as you've said, a lot of that is based on movies and popular culture. I imagine it was much less refined back in the day, and I'm glad you've found that it's been helping. Have you noticed any issues with memory. It's kind of been the big knock against it.


Yeah, but it really depends on what you are worried about. I'm sure recall for the last two years will be hazy, but I was depressed as hell and drinking and using (mild) drugs. It's really not something I'd like to remember anyways.

It really kinda "wakes you up" so to speak. I haven't felt some of these feelings and some of this clarity in years. The only downside as I mentioned is that it feels like you have to scramble to get your act together. I suddenly realized life is passing me by, which is quite anxiety provoking, but is to be expected.


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## slowlyimproving (Jan 2, 2014)

I met someone who had this procedure and he said that it does affect your memory. In his words, "you forget minor things"....But then again, if it does affect your memory, it could affect "major" things as well and you wouldn't know it.

He felt it helped him. I think it's too risky. I don't want my memory messed with.


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

Yes, I was interested in hearing about ECT. I would worry about memory problem. Intolerable memory problems are the reason Earnest Hemingway blew his brains out with a shotgun.

I think my pdoc suggested ECT much more because he had no other ideas, rather than because it's good idea. My GP, who's really into mental health, feels it's a last resort since it how it can "blow out your memory." He also points out that's it generally used for depression & bipolar depression.

I'm not all that depressed. Despite keeping two loaded pistols in the house, I feel absolutely no desire to shoot myself.

But I will be interested to read how things go for you.


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

I have heard of college grads completely forgeting what they learned because of ECT. I think the risks are vastly understated with ECT itself as well as the risks associated with general anesthesia used for the proceedure. I guess one would have to feel pretty hopeless to try ECT as a last resort where you just don't have anything left to lose I guess.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MyBipolarLife (Sep 27, 2015)

ECT has been proven to be a safe and effective treatment by numerous academic studies. It has possible side effects as does any medical procedure but for many it's a viable treatment. The memory lose is usually short term and temporary. The greatest risk is from the anesthesia although this is overstated. Anesthesia utilized in ECT is very short term, lasting only about 5 minutes. They also administer a muscle relaxant so that the actual seizure produced from the electrical shock is almost imperceptible. ECT is far safer than many medications. It is utilized in pregnant people and other high risk populations. Usually reserved as a treatment of last resort after everything else has failed. It is faster than many psychotropic medications and is therefore utilized on highly suicidal and depressed patients. Like many subjects having to do with mental illness, the myths and stigma surrounding this treatment option are based on urban legend, outdated knowledge and anecdotal evidence. I myself have had ECT four times and have worked in psychiatric hospitals where I have seen hundreds of people treated with this proven technique. Far from a miracle cure but also not the barbaric procedure typically thought of by the public.


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## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

MyBipolarLife said:


> ECT has been proven to be a safe and effective treatment by numerous academic studies. It has possible side effects as does any medical procedure but for many it's a viable treatment. The memory lose is usually short term and temporary. The greatest risk is from the anesthesia although this is overstated. Anesthesia utilized in ECT is very short term, lasting only about 5 minutes. They also administer a muscle relaxant so that the actual seizure produced from the electrical shock is almost imperceptible. ECT is far safer than many medications. It is utilized in pregnant people and other high risk populations. Usually reserved as a treatment of last resort after everything else has failed. It is faster than many psychotropic medications and is therefore utilized on highly suicidal and depressed patients. Like many subjects having to do with mental illness, the myths and stigma surrounding this treatment option are based on urban legend, outdated knowledge and anecdotal evidence. I myself have had ECT four times and have worked in psychiatric hospitals where I have seen hundreds of people treated with this proven technique. Far from a miracle cure but also not the barbaric procedure typically thought of by the public.


Yes, I think it's supposed to be a lot safer than the days of yore. It's in no way as it is depicted in Cuckoo's Nest. The memory loss is only temporary from what I hear.

As I said, my memory is a bit fuzzy but it's nothing too dramatic. If you're well being and life is at stake, it should be used.

It has definately helped lift depression. As for anxiety, it hasn't done anything, but I am using Klonopin to get through anxiety provoking situations.

I'm more motivated to find a job, I'm going out more, I hate being indoors all day, I could go on. Again, I'm using Nardil so it could also be some of that.

I completed 11 sessions and may be going back for more. I might give it a couple weeks rest.


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## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

Noca said:


> I have heard of college grads completely forgeting what they learned because of ECT. I think the risks are vastly understated with ECT itself as well as the risks associated with general anesthesia used for the proceedure. I guess one would have to feel pretty hopeless to try ECT as a last resort where you just don't have anything left to lose I guess.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I don't know about this. Seems like exageration. Or perhaps stories of people doing it in the last century.

I still have all my job skills and college education intact. I was even learning Spanish prior, and none of that is gone. I can still recall a lot of knowledge and information. Petty stuff like stupid inside jokes with friends doesn't come to mind as easily. My theory on this though, is that I just came to realize what's important and WORTH remembering.

Also, I think my anxiety has been high lately due to the ECT making me realize just how much in disarray my life is. I have a lot of personal work to do.


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

valyriansteel said:


> I don't know about this. Seems like exageration. Or perhaps stories of people doing it in the last century.
> 
> I still have all my job skills and college education intact. I was even learning Spanish prior, and none of that is gone. I can still recall a lot of knowledge and information. Petty stuff like stupid inside jokes with friends doesn't come to mind as easily. My theory on this though, is that I just came to realize what's important and WORTH remembering.
> 
> Also, I think my anxiety has been high lately due to the ECT making me realize just how much in disarray my life is. I have a lot of personal work to do.


Risks are not about what is guaranteed to happen they are about what MAY happen. Failing to inform a patient of the risks is unethical IMO. The patient always needs to be informed so that they can make an informed decision and choose to accept the risks, not have someone else choose for them.

Just because the vast majority of patients taking Zyprexa won't develop diabetes, there is certainly an increased risk of it happening and a certain percentage(don't know off the top of my head) will. Just throwing Zyprexa at someone and basically having the physician make the choice for you regarding the risks is unethical and immoral. Same goes for any other medical treatment, properly inform the patient and let them decide which risks they want to accept and which they do not. Since it is the patient who will face the consequences(good or bad) and NEVER(short of causing death) the doctor or person administering the treatment, it should be the patient who decides.


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## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

Noca said:


> Risks are not about what is guaranteed to happen they are about what MAY happen. Failing to inform a patient of the risks is unethical IMO. The patient always needs to be informed so that they can make an informed decision and choose to accept the risks, not have someone else choose for them.
> 
> Just because the vast majority of patients taking Zyprexa won't develop diabetes, there is certainly an increased risk of it happening and a certain percentage(don't know off the top of my head) will. Just throwing Zyprexa at someone and basically having the physician make the choice for you regarding the risks is unethical and immoral. Same goes for any other medical treatment, properly inform the patient and let them decide which risks they want to accept and which they do not. Since it is the patient who will face the consequences(good or bad) and NEVER(short of causing death) the doctor or person administering the treatment, it should be the patient who decides.


They do inform you and make you sign releases.


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## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

I'll add an update to this, I believe it's been about 2-3 months since the procedure.


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## WanderingSoul (Apr 22, 2012)

Oh, my update is that I'm back in the pits again. Trying to decide whether to do another round of ECT or not. I was starting Nardil at the same time, so not sure what really helped. 

But I was quite motivated and actually pursued work, went to several interviews, got rejected by every single one, except for one thing that hardly provides any income monthly and is somewhat unreliable.


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