# How has social anxiety affected your career?



## ashleyskye (Jan 6, 2015)

I have tried to start my career repeatedly over the last 4 years and keep failing. Every time my boss (or someone else) says something negative about me, I start thinking I am getting fired and I end up quitting. I am currently working part time at one place (that barely pays above min wage), and casual for another place. I feel like a total failure as I hold a professional degree and can't manage to be around people long enough to even get started in my field.


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## BlueDay (May 6, 2014)

Yep, I've gotten flack at most places for being too quiet or not enthusiastic enough. Some I've quit, some I've been canned.


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## vm8 (Jan 6, 2015)

Me too. I worked at Taco Bell when I was 16 and after two weeks, I quit because I couldn't take the pressure. Well, I tried to quit...my boss didn't want to let me go even though I broke down in front of her! Eh, not the best quiting story


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## modusPonens (Apr 19, 2014)

I had to quit my last job which lasted 8 months due to social anxiety, I just couldn't handle all the acting confident and social, I just needed a break from all of it, just trying to find a job which suits me better now.


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## Hayman (Dec 27, 2014)

I've never progressed at all in my career. A 18 year old will earn barely less than me.

I was in my first job for just over nine years. I was always on minimum wage despite being loyal to the company and taking on more tasks as and when required. I was very much left out of pleasant conversations by one particular director, who would happily talk to most other people. I very much wasn't part of her 'clique' even though I'd never actually done or said anything to upset her. She eventually made me redundant which brought on my first proper bout of depression, which I still don't think I've recovered fully from. 

I'm currently in my second job, which I've been at for over four years. I work with more people who come across as caring people. However, they're very two-faced. It's a similar position on an equally grim level of pay (with more hours and travel time) with near enough no prospects of ever progressing. 

Meanwhile a lot of other people of my age who done worse than me at school and we're generally unreliable are now happily climbing the ladder, being paid almost twice as much as me, getting company cars e.t.c. All because they seem to be heavy socialisers... 

Whenever I've tried to talk I'm immediately shouted down or argued at. Other people earn themselves thousands of pounds worth of pay rises and perks.

I give up. As I’ve said before, other people can seek and get pleasure in their lives without trying all that much. I can't get anything even by running myself into the ground.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

I am unemployed now because of SA. Its so debilitating.


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## comfy (Apr 27, 2013)

almost 7 months after graduating college and still unemployed. The Feds will be after me after i use up all my graduation money to pay the first couple of school loan payments. 
...**** college


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*I wish, wish, wish & wish for feedback*

for any enemy of mine

gave me or anyone else provided a description of what they didn't like about me.

I ask everyone for that

A real and only way to progress. Knowing what's wrong.
I spent my elapsed career diagnosing and fixing all faults. If you don't observe or share results with the culprit, they will be underground from then

People keep their opinions hidden, smiling

When they fire you without a reason, and don't unveil the cause of their hate, it's the main punishment & torture of life. Same as partner.

They might go back to their group and cuss.

I have to come up with imaginary positive things about me.


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## EmotionlessThug (Oct 4, 2011)

Nope.

Dear *********

Thank you for your interest in employment opportunities with Wendy's. We have reviewed the information you provided us. Unfortunately, your application for this position will not be considered at this time.

Hello *******,
Thank you for taking the time to apply with us. We are unable to offer you a position at this time, but we do appreciate your interest in Target.


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## sm71 (Jan 9, 2015)

I just graduated with a ba in education. I was offered a long term substitute job. I have been doing okay up until this week. These past 2 days I have been having panic attacks to the point I shake. I may have to quit.

Is anyone taking medicine to help them? I am thinking I may need to try a benzodiazepine so it enters my system faster.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

It's why I got a late start finding a job. Most people get their first job when they're a teenager, even people on this site.


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## TryingMara (Mar 25, 2012)

SA has crippled me career-wise. I finally got a better position after years and years of looking, but I am doing a terrible job. Not sure whether I'll freak out and quit first or they'll fire me.


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

It stopped me from ever having one. I have worked in the past - but always at a much lower level than I was capable of doing.


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## Grog (Sep 13, 2013)

It was the major player in the decision to me letting go of my buisness .


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## AHolivier (Aug 6, 2009)

.


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## GloomyTracy (Jan 17, 2015)

SA has meant I can't have a career, just a job I have been going to for the past 7 years where the pay is somewhat low, however, I save about 80% or more of every paycheck because I am so fearful that if I ever lost this job, I might not be able to find another job. My parents mention my lack of a profession/career every now and then and mention how they bumped into someone in town and how that person's son/daughter is doing this or that career-wise in life, always a reminder how SA controls my life. It is easy to save money, because SA won't allow me to take vacations or eat out at restaurants or shop at the mall, and with gas prices so low now, I can often get by on only spending $25 a week for general expenses. With my personal-space issues, I can probably never have a husband and be married, so I have learned how to make $30k a year be stretched so two-thirds of that can go into a retirement account and I live without loans or credit cards.

The hardest part about the job has been seeing new employees over the years make more progress in "knowing the ropes" of the business and socializing in their first week, than I have made in 7 years.


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## Kind Of (Jun 11, 2014)

I've never met a woman in IT who wasn't bad at it (three bad instructors in a row, woo!), so I'm terrified of under-performing and getting lumped in with them. Because I'm intimidated by the men around me who have more experience and have no one to relate to, I sometimes think of backpedaling as hard as I can and trying to do something else before it's too late.


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

lol what career.


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## AllieCat (Jan 21, 2015)

My job requires me to occasionally deal with very unhappy people - sometimes they're polite, and sometimes they're very mean and nasty. I absolutely cannot handle it. Many days I have gone home and cried, and spent other days walking around with a constant knot of tension in my chest from anticipating the next angry person. I can't even answer my work phone anymore...I let it go to voicemail and spend the next 2 hours working up the courage to call the person back. Sometimes I have to fill in for the secretary, and answering the phone is absolutely terrifying.


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## peacelizard (Apr 17, 2014)

It's holding me back from taking the classes I need to move on to med school and then hopefully psych/im


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## MikeXero (Jan 18, 2015)

My first long term job was in Tesco Extra and It was interesting how I was put in charge of the dairy department there - it did freak my out on a daily basis though, having to talk to complete strangers and if you've ever worked in retail or shop, you'll know what kinds of customers you can get; laid back, nasty people, a-holes and my personal favorite "people who are hell bent in proving they are right." 

When you have SA and you work in such an unpredictable environment, the effects are very strong. I don't regret it though, I find throwing yourself into the deep end with no way out is usually the best way to learn, but that is really just me. 

Anyway, to answer your question. SA has effect my finding work, larger during interviews. Who would have thought an employer wouldn't want to hire someone who is a quivering wreck? XD


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## zonebox (Oct 22, 2012)

I don't have a career, I have jobs.

There are more factors at play, outside of social anxiety for the reason I don't have a career. Social anxiety plays a part, I'm sure.. but ultimately, I don't want to be tied down to people I don't like, doing something I would not like, for the rest of my life.

The things I do like doing, other people can do far better than I. So, a career is not really in the cards for me, and that is okay. I don't need to get paid for doing the things I enjoy, to gain relevance to my life.

And to be honest, I don't think I would even enjoy staying focused on just one thing I enjoy doing. There is not one thing I am solely focused on in this world, that gives me pleasure. There are many things, and trying to create a career out of a bunch of disconnected hobbies would be a hard thing to do.


I'm not going to blame social anxiety for me not being a billionaire, millionaire, or even lower middle class. I'm fine with my place on this planet, it is pretty awesome where I am at right now regardless. I live a life, people in the past could only dream about.


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## LolaViola (Jun 23, 2013)

I don't even have a career.


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

I'm mid internship, and unless I can get some serious ativan tomorrow I am not sure I'll be able to rise to the occasion, especially with school on top of me. Even with benzos it's going to be rough. This gig requires me to make contacts, network, organize social events like public workshops for the community, or to help people file government paperwork...ugh, it's awful. 

I'm so nervous, and my supervisor isn't giving me a lot of boundaries, or information to work with, even when I ask. It was her idea to set up this workshop related to a recent executive order by Obama that defers deportation for working immigrant families and their children. I've never done anything like that before, and I'm emailing this person I don't know to host a workshop about a subject I know nothing about...what are my parameters? Do I promote this thing? Can I delegate to people? I'm not even officially hired, nobody respects me. They won't listen if I delegate my tasks to make this happen.

Ugh...I don't know about this last semester of college...I just hope it ends with lots of drugs, because this is f---ing brutal.


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## GroupTherapy (Feb 24, 2014)

My job requires me to be in a small room with people for the whole day. I feel that my presence causes people to feel uncomfortable/ make the whole room awkward. I'm almost sure I do, it's just that no ones says it to my face. When I walk by, people stop talking, stuff like that. I feel like I'm gonna get fired soon cause of it. And I dread every morning cause of it. Work is a anxiety filled hell for me. It sucks


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## GraciaSeinoPie (Sep 12, 2014)

I'll be graduating university come next May, and I haven't once tried to get a job. Almost everyone in my class, or almost anyone at my age really, has gotten a job or two. I don't even know how I'll be able to handle interview. I really doubt I'll pass any interview at all, really.

If I were to be alone, I think I might actually prefer lying there starving than getting a job. I know it's mostly just my mind imagining the worst stuff, but it seems harder and harder to work up the courage to face it. I keep telling myself that, instead of sitting here worrying and making up all kind of terrible scenarios, I should just plunge blindly into any job ad I can find and try to get one. Then I'll be able to erase these negative thoughts, and have more confidence, and start working like a good citizen.

Yeah, I keep telling myself. The problem is the actual doing part. I know I'll have to face it. But I keep running. Such cowardice..


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## GroupTherapy (Feb 24, 2014)

GraciaSeinoPie said:


> I'll be graduating university come next May, and I haven't once tried to get a job. Almost everyone in my class, or almost anyone at my age really, has gotten a job or two. I don't even know how I'll be able to handle interview. I really doubt I'll pass any interview at all, really.
> 
> If I were to be alone, I think I might actually prefer lying there starving than getting a job. I know it's mostly just my mind imagining the worst stuff, but it seems harder and harder to work up the courage to face it. I keep telling myself that, instead of sitting here worrying and making up all kind of terrible scenarios, I should just plunge blindly into any job ad I can find and try to get one. Then I'll be able to erase these negative thoughts, and have more confidence, and start working like a good citizen.
> 
> Yeah, I keep telling myself. The problem is the actual doing part. I know I'll have to face it. But I keep running. Such cowardice..


What's your major? I'm asking because you should try to think of a job related to your major that would cause the least amount of stress for you. For example I'm an auditor (accountant). My job requires me to be in a small room on one desk with 2 to 3 of my coworkers. I hate it!!! The room is always dead silent, which then causes me to have panic attacks. That situation is a living hell. When I'm in my own cube, I'm ok for the most part. I've been recently thinking about switching to tax, because I've read that they just prepare tax returns at their desk all day. No one bothers you except for the occasional question. I can talk to co-workers in short bursts like asking a question. But over-extended periods of time is stressful and unpleasant. To me that sounds like heaven. While preparing returns is boring, working at my desk all day sounds like a vacation. Quitting my current job sounds scary, but I think I might be happier in the long-run. Sorry for going into my own situation, but start thinking about your options. As far as the interview goes, imagine once you get past that and find a job that suits you, it'll be more or less smooth sailing. Now I'm using the image of my future job at my desk all day as hope. A light at the end of the tunnel. Good luck!


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## ctbooty (Feb 1, 2015)

I'm considering stepping down from a promotion because of my S.A.


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## fonz (Oct 15, 2008)

What career? I've been doing a dead end job for years,but I can't make myself care too much...


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## ChangelingGirl (Nov 15, 2012)

I can't work at all but I doub tit's due to social anxiety. It's more that my sensory issues and bad organiational skills are preventing me from performing on any sort of level required for work or schooling. Then again in high school I had terrible anxiety about being aroudn people and it was making my school life miserable but not affectign my grades.


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## marsupilami29 (May 28, 2014)

Can't even start a career. Just apllying for a job scares the hell out of me, interview is terrifying (blew up my last one big time), and picturing myself working with a bunch of strangers is nerve-racking. I am always afraid of what they will think of me and how I will not be good enough for the job...


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

I had to quit my last 2 jobs because of it. Hard seeing what to do next.


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