# Am I a Loser for still being unemployed?



## Nightwing85 (Dec 6, 2013)

Its been almost 8 months since I quit my job due to my SA. I still have not found a new job and the thought of working and going about the process of applying and interviews makes me ill with anxiety. Am I justa huge and pathetic loser because I sure do feel that way.


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## MrNormal (Aug 8, 2013)

No you're not, but you must try to find another job. You can't live without money forever.. I'm guessing your parents support you. What will you do when they leave for heaven? Who'll support you then? You need to think ahead because it'll soon catch up on you and you'll wonder why you didn't do anything sooner. Trust me.


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

Nightwing85 said:


> Its been almost 8 months since I quit my job due to my SA. I still have not found a new job and the thought of working and going about the process of applying and interviews makes me ill with anxiety. Am I justa huge and pathetic loser because I sure do feel that way.


 I don't think you are pathetic or a loser! How old are you and what was your previous job? you have had a job before so you are not a loser in any sense.It's just that fear controls your mind at the moment as you have been in home for a long time without going outside.I'm sure it will fade away in between some weeks after you could join to a new job


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Nightwing85 said:


> Its been almost 8 months since I quit my job due to my SA. I still have not found a new job and the thought of working and going about the process of applying and interviews makes me ill with anxiety. Am I justa huge and pathetic loser because I sure do feel that way.


Been there.

I was unemployed for 23 months. It takes its toll on the psyche.
You are not alone in the unemployment - it's still WAY too high in the United States. That won't change for a while.


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

millenniumman75 said:


> Been there.
> 
> I was unemployed for 23 months.


I wonder if you were unemployed for that long time who does financially support you? your parents?


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## OutsideR1 (Mar 13, 2014)

ByMyself19 said:


> I wonder if you were unemployed for that long time who does financially support you? your parents?


government benefits?


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## Marko3 (Mar 18, 2014)

well i quit well paid job. just before world economic crisis started... now im like part timing for almost 5years now.. but i got so much better with SA here.. best choice in my life to quit that first job... =)


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## Marko3 (Mar 18, 2014)

OutsideR1 said:


> government benefits?


we dont get that here... well some get it.. but the sum is so low u cant do **** with it...


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

ByMyself19 said:


> I wonder if you were unemployed for that long time who does financially support you? your parents?


At that point, yes. I still had my life savings to handle things like car and credit card.


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

OutsideR1 said:


> government benefits?


Oh great!


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

Marko3 said:


> we dont get that here... well some get it.. but the sum is so low u cant do **** with it...


We don't get that here either..unless someone is physically disabled.I don't think here in my country government support for SA sufferers.


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## Nightwing85 (Dec 6, 2013)

ByMyself19 said:


> I don't think you are pathetic or a loser! How old are you and what was your previous job? you have had a job before so you are not a loser in any sense.It's just that fear controls your mind at the moment as you have been in home for a long time without going outside.I'm sure it will fade away in between some weeks after you could join to a new job


I am 28 and my previous job was as a third key shift manager at GameStop. I worked that for three years constantly being told I would be promoted and constantly being screwed over from day one. Finally I was passed over for advancement once again when I had had enough. I got a new job at a call center but quit after one day because of my anxiety and they were very unprofessional in dealing with a new employee. Actually I do get out I run errands, and have a big backyard.Also my grandmother has recently been diagnosed with lung cancer so I spend a lot of my time there helping her and my granddad.


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## Nightwing85 (Dec 6, 2013)

ByMyself19 said:


> We don't get that here either..unless someone is physically disabled.I don't think here in my country government support for SA sufferers.


What country do you live in? In the United States it is possible to get disability because of anxiety but it is tough.


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## Nightwing85 (Dec 6, 2013)

millenniumman75 said:


> Been there.
> 
> I was unemployed for 23 months. It takes its toll on the psyche.
> You are not alone in the unemployment - it's still WAY too high in the United States. That won't change for a while.


It is way too high and the government does not want to help at all. My benefits just ended but because of inactivity of congress can not get an extension.


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## Marko3 (Mar 18, 2014)

ByMyself19 said:


> We don't get that here either..unless someone is physically disabled.I don't think here in my country government support for SA sufferers.


true true...

here... doctor would laugh at u so hard, if u told him u have SA and asked him how could u get some benefits for that...

SA ppl here r totally left on their own here... just so un-kind!


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Nightwing85 said:


> It is way too high and the government does not want to help at all. My benefits just ended but because of inactivity of congress can not get an extension.


For me, it was 26 weeks extended to 39. in 2002-2004. That's all I got.


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

Nightwing85 said:


> I am 28 and my previous job was as a third key shift manager at GameStop. I worked that for three years constantly being told I would be promoted and constantly being screwed over from day one. Finally I was passed over for advancement once again when I had had enough. I got a new job at a call center but quit after one day because of my anxiety and they were very unprofessional in dealing with a new employee. Actually I do get out I run errands, and have a big backyard.Also my grandmother has recently been diagnosed with lung cancer so I spend a lot of my time there helping her and my granddad.


Well..28 years is not such a big age so don't give up on your hopes..yes Anxiety makes us lazy and avoid us from doing the things we should do in life...But you are still so young so I'm sure you could get a new job soon :yes I suggest you to apply to a job that need less communicating skills.Cause interacting with other people is what us SA sufferers makes weak.Btw I feel sorry about your grandmother  I wish she could get well soon.


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

Nightwing85 said:


> What country do you live in? In the United States it is possible to get disability because of anxiety but it is tough.


Oh well I live in an Asian country.


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

Marko3 said:


> true true...
> 
> here... doctor would laugh at u so hard, if u told him u have SA and asked him how could u get some benefits for that...
> 
> SA ppl here r totally left on their own here... just so un-kind!


Haha that's so true  yes they actually laughed at me once when I said that I have an anxiety disorder called "Social Anxiety" I bet they doctors in my country don't even know that SA exists in this world.They simply imply it as "shyness"


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## Marko3 (Mar 18, 2014)

ByMyself19 said:


> Haha  yes they actually laughed at me once when I said that I have an anxiety disorder called "Social Anxiety" I bet they doctors in my country don't even know that SA exists in this world.


haha.. i rly dont know should i laugh or cry.. but hey, im gonna laugh


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## Sourdog (Sep 13, 2011)

Hell no!


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

Marko3 said:


> haha.. i rly dont know should i laugh or cry.. but hey, im gonna laugh


Yes just the thought of asking benefits for SA makes me laugh  I imagine How funny will be the impression on doctor's face :haha It's just so impossible here.No one understands us.What's worse than living in a country where nobody understand and doesn't offer any benefit for SA sufferers.


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## Marko3 (Mar 18, 2014)

ByMyself19 said:


> Yes just the thought of asking benefits for SA makes me laugh  I imagine How funny will be the impression on doctor's face :haha It's just so impossible here.No one understands us.What's worse than living in a country where nobody understand and doesn't offer any benefit for SA sufferers.


u got that right

but hey.. why dont we get our revenge by getting better with SA... i think i can do it and so can u...:yes


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## Golden Angel (May 30, 2014)

Been there, done that (2011-2013)


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## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

My answer is no.


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## SomaBlu (May 30, 2014)

*Oh how I relate*

Hey, I left my job in December 2013 and I'm still unemployed. People don't know it but it's partly b/c I'm ****ing terrified to jump back into the swing of things. I understand, I feel you. It is what it is, keep fighting it. Keep applying and pushing.


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## Batty (Mar 3, 2014)

Nightwing85 said:


> Its been almost 8 months since I quit my job due to my SA. I still have not found a new job and the thought of working and going about the process of applying and interviews makes me ill with anxiety. Am I justa huge and pathetic loser because I sure do feel that way.


I don't think you're a loser! I'm in the same boat you are. I feel the same way, but I lost my job in February. I haven't even really thought about looking. I mean, I think about in the sense that I'm going "I should probably be doing that," But then my anxiety starts and I freak out, and keep telling myself I can't handle it even though I probably could.

It's not easy for us. I don't know about you, but I only qualify for the crappy, temporary jobs like retail or fast food, or being a secretary, and those jobs require dealing with people and having great people skills--otherwise you get fired after 9 months of hard work. Going to school will only put me into debt for the rest of my life, and there's nothing I want to do with my life...

I know from experience that keeping yourself away from working and away from people only makes it harder to get back in and out there. You know?

Not to mention, it's really hard to keep applying to job after job without even so much as acknowledgment. A "Hey we got your application," Would make me feel better, even if they didn't hire me...but nope.

Anyway, I'm not trying to discourage you. I know it's hard, but you should try to get at least a part-time job. Try going for something that has very few hours, and work at that for a while, and then after a while you might start feeling confident. I'm going to try to do this same thing, but...not a lot of people are hiring, so I don't know how soon I can try.

Don't get discouraged, we believe in you, OP!


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## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

Not going to lie, most people would consider you a loser.


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## XenaFan87 (May 31, 2014)

Imbored21 said:


> Not going to lie, most people would consider you a loser.


I'm unemployed but I am a phone sex operator/cam girl and I hate it. I would much rather be a loser than be work at home sex slave. I'd consider it sex abuse, some people think it's good work, and its not. If you had a choice to do something you hate but choose to hate yourself, what would it be?????


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## ByMyself19 (Feb 5, 2014)

Marko3 said:


> u got that right
> 
> but hey.. why dont we get our revenge by getting better with SA... i think i can do it and so can u...:yes


Oh yes I should try to get better with SA  but you know it's pretty hard sometimes :yes I wonder what country are you from? :idea


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## MrQuiet76 (Aug 26, 2011)

i didnt get my first real job til i was 26 so i think that makes me more of a loser


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## OutsideR1 (Mar 13, 2014)

Marko3 said:


> true true...
> 
> here... doctor would laugh at u so hard, if u told him u have SA and asked him how could u get some benefits for that...
> 
> SA ppl here r totally left on their own here... just so un-kind!


That is really terrible. Even though they are cracking down on benefits here in england, at least you would be taken seriously if you applied for welfare because of sa.


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## OutsideR1 (Mar 13, 2014)

Imbored21 said:


> Not going to lie, most people would consider you a loser.


Then those people are very close minded because the economy is ****ed, and it is normal for people to be unemployed for only 8 months. Also, who cares what others think?


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## anomnomnom (May 28, 2013)

No

the job situation seems to suck everywhere.

It took me...way too long to find a job (which I dont even like) I wouldn't look down on anyone not working unless they were leeching benefits and were happy about it, which I realise is only a very small % of people unemployed, I know I bloody hated it..but like you the whole process scared the **** out of me


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*I see all the history is embedded*

There's no way to reverse it. Reputation

I hate causing a bad status by doing it myself.

Any time not working means life gets worse.

Either someone chooses to get rid of you or you walk away
It's a horrible ratchet
No way back into fame. Unfair

I can only be negative about myself. Under the thumb of judges. My reversing effort doesn't pay

I recently generated a new thought for people on the phone: is your client willing to take on anyone who isn't employed today? Do they want someone who's been in the same position for years and want to pry them away from their current by offering an appealing change?


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

SomaBlu said:


> Hey, I left my job in December 2013 and I'm still unemployed. People don't know it but it's partly b/c I'm ****ing terrified to jump back into the swing of things. I understand, I feel you. It is what it is, keep fighting it. Keep applying and pushing.


just once ever I decided to hand in notice and go, feeling on top of things - king of the hill in the knowledge of the company. I wanted to take my expertise to other trades. I got kicked out many times before. I thought it was time to turn the career around. It didn't happen.
Any new chance never lasts. Being technical is no good. Must be socialite.


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## terran236 (Feb 4, 2014)

Dude i can relate, The only reason i have the job i have now is because of my dad. It's through his ballsiness that i have this job. I applied at a new casino they were building.

I was just gonna apply and wait for them to call me because i hate talking to people.
Unexpectedly he goes "ok lets go to the job fair" 

So because of my dads assertiveness i landed an ok job as a peasant. 

Were it not for him i would have been unemployed for who knows how long. Doesn't help that I made him pay for college degree i never used. I feel so bad for that. 

Now days i just pretty much gave up and just wait for deaths sweet embrace. Because frankly... i dont see my self going anywhere from here. 

I wish i could say something more positive like the nice peeps here but all i can say is...

you are not alone, i can relate 100%.


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## myersljennifer (Sep 6, 2013)

Nightwing85 said:


> Its been almost 8 months since I quit my job due to my SA. I still have not found a new job and the thought of working and going about the process of applying and interviews makes me ill with anxiety. Am I justa huge and pathetic loser because I sure do feel that way.


You are not a loser for being unemployed. You have a mental disability which greatly impacts you and your ability to function in society, let alone work. Personally, I wish I didn't have my job. It's ruining my life and I'd rather be on the streets. If you can, try to work on your SA for the time being before finding another job.


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## nicescowl39 (Jun 12, 2014)

Nope, you're not a loser.

I've been unable to hold down a job for over six YEARS now.


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## Hallowed Ground (Dec 1, 2013)

No way are you a loser, i've been unemployed about 5 months now and its hard, I apply to loads of jobs but get very few responses.

Most people will unemployed at some point in their lives, so try not to let it get you down.


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## thinkstoomuch101 (Jun 7, 2012)

no, you're not a loser.

my high-end executive boyfriend, ran out of unemployment benefits last year.

The Silicon-Valley white collar workers had it very, very nice. Many of them were "let go" with great serverance packages. Plus, THEIR unemployment bennies are unbelievable.

Being what is considered *"Pink Collar"*..i didn't get ANY bennies.

When i had to quit to due to permanent relocation, i was told one min., i had bennies for up to 2 years - then a letter stating basically: *"Ummm.. no, you don't, get back out there and get a job!"..*

When my *White Collar* SO was "let go?" they gave him over 4 years of unemployment - plus the severance package which gave him a large amount of stock in the company. And the unemployment office was EXTREMELY polite to him.. The unemployment office has a different sector/branch for those who were making over 1/2 a million a year.:um

Since we're pretty much living in a near 3rd world state, there's absolutely no employment here for "high tech".. so he's dipping in his bank account, while i take care of everything else.

the economy is bad. Top executive jobs are low.

Two of the Silicon Valley types that my SO knew? One lost everything, so she basically paid rent walking/caretaking a person's dog for a year.. then it died. She's living with her mom.

the other top "Whiz kid" from Silicon Valley.. Living off his parents.

many of them were at the top of the heap, Ferrari's, trophy wives, big houses etc., Now, several of them had to go back to India or elsewhere, go back home, live with their parents, or are homeless.

Only a handful made it to Microsoft, Yahoo or Google.:blank


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## marne141 (Mar 26, 2012)

Your not at all a loser. Ive been unemployed now for about 7 months had an interview yesterday and had a panic attack while waiting and left the building. How do u think im feeling now? now i scared ****less of jus going on an intervew let alone working fml lol


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