# Commuting is NOT synonymous with being an outsider



## sunshineclippy (Jul 19, 2005)

As I read posts about making friends in college, I can't help but notice comments like "I commute and have no friends" or "Commuters aren't really involved on campus".

Here is my experience. I attend a college where most of the students live on campus. I commute 3 times a week and it takes me roughly 45 minutes to get to school. As a freshman, I did feel alienated and a little left out. The other kids were having new experiences from which I was excluded (dorms, roommates, meal plans, etc ...) Honestly, it was a crappy first semester.

I debated between: 
1. Transferring 
2. Moving on Campus (and wasting thousands of dollars)
3. Sticking it out.

With support from my parents, I stuck it out. Gradually I realized that I had noone to blame myself for being out of the loop. I soon made a firm decision to be a commuting student who was really apart of campus rather than a mindless drone who only showed up for class.

If you are a commuter, don't just show up for class. Attend campus events, eat lunch in the cafeteria, and join a club or two. Commuting does not have to be synonymous with loneliness.


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## rb27 (Jul 17, 2005)

sunshineclippy said:


> If you are a commuter, don't just show up for class. Attend campus events, eat lunch in the cafeteria, and join a club or two.


I've thought of doing all those things, but when my classes are over I just want to go home. But you are right.


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## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

Yeah for me it's pretty much been just like high school. Go to university, sit in class, go home.


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## cakesniffer (Nov 11, 2003)

My college is a "commuter college" and therefore everyone commutes. It's really what you make of it.


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## depressedavoidant (Dec 31, 2004)

Likewise, you can live on campus and still feel like an outsider.


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## WhyMe888 (Aug 22, 2005)

Sheri said:


> My college is a "commuter college" and therefore everyone commutes. It's really what you make of it.


that's like my college. half the campus commutes and alot of the residents live 5-10 minutes away from school. there's no one here on the weekends. if you come to my school on the weekends, there's a 90% chance you'll be the only one walking around on campus


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## Ames105 (Nov 6, 2005)

> Likewise, you can live on campus and still feel like an outsider.


Exactly. I've lived on/near campus for nearly 3 years now. And I feel like an outsider every now and then. My social life isn't that great.



> It's really what you make of it.


Yep yep, I agree.


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## Meee (Oct 24, 2005)

> Likewise, you can live on campus and still feel like an outsider.


Yeah.. but i think it'd be a little easier to at least try to be more social if i lived there though. Living about half an hour away means it's a pain in the *** to keep coming and going all day.. so when i go home, i generally want to stay at home.. and i don't want to spend my entire day at the university. I know i'd hate it living on campus too though so oh well.


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## ElizaH (Sep 1, 2005)

That's a great attitude. I admire it.  I love just _deciding_ a different situation through sheer power of interpretation.


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## FreeSoul (Jan 1, 2006)

I'm thinking about looking into campus events and clubs at my college...
Still undecided right now.


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## AdamCanada (Dec 6, 2003)

*commute*

its hard when you have to commute and all of your classes have different people in them. Most of the people who go to my school have lived in the same city and are going to college with there high school freinds, which means there not really interested in meeting to many new people.

this semester i have moved within walking distance from school and im in a specific group with all the same people in every class. It seems to be goin alright. I had about an hour drive before i moved, now its about 5 minutes except when its snowing like f'n crazy(like this morning)

its funny becuase scince moving out of home i have cut my drinking by around 75%, i figured it would have went up 200%. im making up for that in other ways tho :cig :um

I used to enjoy my commute to school, just relax and drink my coffee's


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## sunshineclippy (Jul 19, 2005)

AdamCanada,

I could really relate when you said that you went to a university where many of the students knew eachother from high school.

One good thing about this type of scenario is that high school friendships crumble in university. People mature, find interest in different things, and usually don't want to be associated with who their high school identity. 

It was really weird for me because when I hit college my best friend and I had a bad falling out. But a girl I knew from elementary school and I totally reconnected and we hang out now. 

You'll find a niche, don't worry. :group


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## AdamCanada (Dec 6, 2003)

yea, im sure i will somtime, i know people from where i live still though to.

There alot of people who in my school who think they are pretty cool to, its alot like high school, i hear other people say that same thing to.


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## sunshineclippy (Jul 19, 2005)

*Zeppelin*

AdamCanada,

I like your icon, Zeppelin rocks. "Dancing Days" is my favorite song. Do you have "Encomium"? 
:boogie


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## infinite_time (Jul 18, 2005)

*Re: Zeppelin*

This post makes some good points. I'm a commuter too, and most of the people at my college commute. For me it's 50 minute commute (then add in parking time and time to walk to class).



sunshineclippy said:


> AdamCanada,
> 
> I like your icon, Zeppelin rocks. "Dancing Days" is my favorite song. Do you have "Encomium"?
> :boogie


Led Zeppelin is my favorite band  I'm fanatical. hehe :boogie Dancing Days is a great one.


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