# Post the last weird/awkward thing you said to someone because of your anxiety



## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

You may have heard of:

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/socially-awkward-penguin

"Happy Birthday!"
"You too!"

You get the idea.

I'll go first. Someone was telling me about all the healthy eating they've been doing lately due to sickness. I said something along the lines of, "Your pee should be WHITE now." At least in this case it's someone who understands my humour enough to know I'm not genuinely interested in their pee colour, but it also got me thinking about how I would have probably said that to anybody and facepalmed five seconds later.

I hope somebody posts. 
I promise I won't ask about your pee.

:hide


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## cheekypanda (Feb 27, 2011)

IllusionOfHappiness said:


> "Happy Birthday!"
> "You too!"
> 
> *
> ...


That made me giggle. :lol

I can't think of anything on the spot but I always have those moments. 
I can relate to the "happy Birthday" "You too!" thing...

What always gets me is when I am at a store and the clerk says "Come again!" when my brain on auto-pilot thinks h/she said "Have a good day" and thus I reply with "You too!"


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

cheekypanda said:


> What always gets me is when I am at a store and the clerk says "Come again!" when my brain on auto-pilot thinks h/she said "Have a good day" and thus I reply with "You too!"


Oh dear, that's always an uncomfortable moment. I wish clerks would leave it at "have a nice day" as that's something you can give a big fat "YOU TOO."

I would have to stop and think about what to say to "come again" (besides being immature and saying that's what she said).

"Will do"?

"Okay"?

"If you stop asking me that"?


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## Jennifer Clayton (Nov 19, 2010)

I can't think of the last embarassing thing, but I can think of something that happened a few days ago. I work at Chick-fil-A, I take people's money and I'm supposed to interact with them and whatnot. Okay, when someone says 'thank you', we are supposed to say 'my pleasure!' instead of 'you're welcome'. We never say 'you're welcome'. Well, I get so used to saying 'my pleasure' that some people will say 'have a good day', and I'll respond with 'my pleasure', instead of 'you too!' I always feel like a total idiot afterwards.

Also, it's hard to hear some people when they talk because they speak so softly, and sometimes I won't be sure if they said 'thank you' or not. So one time I said 'my pleasure' when they hadn't said 'thank you', and then they said thank you afterwards because of it. It's like when someone does something nice for you but you forget to say 'thank you', and so they say 'you're welcome', to remind you to say thank you.

LOL I didn't want to come off as rude or anything. I just feel like a dork now... :b


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## UnderBridge (Mar 3, 2011)

There was when a maintenance worker came into to the bakery where I was working, now I know this bakery top to bottom. So the guy asked me "do you know where I could find a sink" that sent me into a panic cause I really didn't pick up on what he was asking of me, so I replied" sorry, we don't have that here". So he walks off and I hear running water so I turned around and the guy washing his hands in the sink It was right behind me across the room the entire time. ugh, felt like a complete imbecile


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## arpeggiator (Jan 6, 2011)

Today a girl who lives near me asked me if she could go with me in my way home, but I was very busy worring about the whole situation (Should I go with her????) so I didn't hear her. I don't know how, but I managed to ask the same thing, and she said 'That's what I have just asked'.

The other day I was looking for a building, but I couldn't find it. When I got the courage to ask someone where it was, he responded 'It's that'. I was in front of the building.


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## Jennifer Clayton (Nov 19, 2010)

I think the key thing to remember in these situations is that we should not fret over them. Yes, they suck. Yes, some are horribly humiliating. But if we start to obsess over all the tiny things that we think we did wrong, we will make a mountain out of a moehill.

People without SA screw up, too. They just typically don't obsess over it like we do. I hate acting like everything is a gazillion times worse than it is.


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## Salus (Feb 27, 2011)

This happens to me all the time..

They say "Hello" and then i say "good thanks" 

Fail 


Oh and I also have a thing of saying "Thankyou" for everything... if someone borrows something from me or i do something for them...I SAY THANKYOU!!!!!!!!! WTFFFF


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## faefae44 (Feb 7, 2011)

haha I do the "you too" response as well.


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## Gorillaz (Jul 13, 2010)

-How are you?
-Not much, yourself?
damn automatic responses


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## Katiie (Apr 19, 2010)

At work I have to answer the phone and say something along the line of "Hello you've reach -----, this is Kate speaking". 
Anyway recently I had to phone up a company to ask for work experience because I'm currently at uni and we had to get a week of work experiencing that relates to my course that i'm in, so of course I'm sitting there extremely nervous looking at the phone trying to build up the courage to phone them, so when I finally did my mind went completely blank and I started saying "hello you've reach----, this is kate speaking" and then I realized and went silent for a while....extremely awkward phone call!!!!.....they never phoned me back btw lol


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## LilA67 (Jan 14, 2011)

My WORST is: "OH, yeaaah..." (to ANYthing) Dammit I feel like the Kool-Aid guy or something.

Or, I walk around my apartment and say to my hard-to-know roommates "Hey how are youuuu?" (I hope to god it's not the 10th time in one day)

I think the weirdest thing lately was me asking my teacher on the first class day "How are you???" as we had to do this photo thing for attendance. I kind of stuttered, but she answered, "My name is DIONNE, what's YOUR name???" (She thought I was special, I'm sure)


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## Katiie (Apr 19, 2010)

Has anyone accidently said "good night" in stead of "good bye" to someone when they're leaving??


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## Ava (Feb 17, 2011)

when I try to say goodbye to someone and I end up repeating everything they say.

"see you later"
"see you later"
"ok bye!"
"ok bye!"

or

me: "have a good night"
person: "you too"
me: "you too"


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## UnderBridge (Mar 3, 2011)

My Auto response to "How are you" is usually "oh, I'm fine" I have to do that line everyday when coworker greetings are commenced. I say that even when I'm having the worst day imaginable but it's saved me from slip ups for now lol


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## UnderBridge (Mar 3, 2011)

Katiie said:


> Has anyone accidently said "good night" in stead of "good bye" to someone when they're leaving??


oh, god to many time to count. My lines for greetings are decent, but goodbye's are where I slip up bad. like saying "enjoy the rest of your night" when it's 7:00am in the mourning


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## arpeggiator (Jan 6, 2011)

Katiie said:


> Has anyone accidently said "good night" in stead of "good bye" to someone when they're leaving??


No, but once I said 'good afternoon' in the morning.


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## Katiie (Apr 19, 2010)

Oh and another time, while I was working (at a clothing store) a customer came up behind me and mummbled something, so I suddenly turned around (he gave me a fright actually I didn't know he was there), I had no idea what he said but I noticed he had a shirt so I said "oh....did you want to buy that?", because i wasn't sure if he said he wanted to buy it or if he wanted to try it on or if was just asking a general question about it. So anyway the guy starts making out I was accusing of trying to steal the shirt, i'm like....WHAT! the guys standing there holding the shirt right next to me (next to the counter) how could I possible be accusing him of stealing it (I thought I was very nice to him to!)


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## Katiie (Apr 19, 2010)

UnderBridge said:


> oh, god to many time to count. My lines for greetings are decent, but goodbye's are where I slip up bad. like saying "enjoy the rest of your night" when it's 7:00am in the mourning


hahaha I do that to, like when I say "have a good weekend" and it's not even the end of the week yet lol (that turned out to be a pretty funny moment though lol)


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## shanny086 (Feb 15, 2011)

this happens to me too. the WORST is when someone is waving or smiling and you think its to you and you respond and then realize its to the person behind you. i hate that!


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## lostintransition (Mar 1, 2011)

I was with two friends. One of them popped outside for a smoke to which my friend who I was inside said. "Can you see him?" and I replied with "I can't remember". We laughed.


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## Aphexfan (Jan 12, 2011)

I can never figure how to say goodbye to people so usually theres...akwardness....then I just kind of leave...I always feel horrible afterwards


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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

Aphexfan said:


> I can never figure how to say goodbye to people so usually theres...akwardness....then I just kind of leave...I always feel horrible afterwards


:squeeze

I hate it when I say good-bye to someone, and then we start walking away in the same direction... it's SO awkward... so sometimes I wait to see which way they're going, and I'll purposely go the other direction even though I need to go where they're going, so then I make huge loop just to avoid walking away in the same direction... yes it's really awkward... :hide


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## Sollozzo (Mar 2, 2011)

Walking in the gym and the guy working at the front desk says "Have a good workout", and I say "Thanks, you too."


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## Retranslated (Mar 2, 2011)

This is actually partly to blame because of my ADHD and my inability to think before I speak.

One of my friends was adopted, and, for some reason, I caught myself telling adoption / orphan jokes at least 10 times around him and immediately smacking myself mentally for doing so.


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## lostintransition (Mar 1, 2011)

As I give blood, I have to fill in and read paperwork before hand. As the nurse stuck out his hand to take the paperwork, I matched and ended up shaking his hand in front of everyone. I was really embarassed to begin with but I said "does that happen often?" and he said "it all adds to the humour of the day". Which it does and it did.


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## Aphexfan (Jan 12, 2011)

LifeGoesOn said:


> :squeeze
> 
> I hate it when I say good-bye to someone, and then we start walking away in the same direction... it's SO awkward... so sometimes I wait to see which way they're going, and I'll purposely go the other direction even though I need to go where they're going, so then I make huge loop just to avoid walking away in the same direction... yes it's really awkward... :hide


Aww thanks! :kiss
I do the exact same thing!! If I know that im going in the same direction as someone I pursposely go the other way to avoid any "wierdness", so I keep an eye and see which they go :b


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## frillylove (Sep 11, 2010)

I think the most awkward thing to say is nothing at all.

But I'll tell a story anyways. A couple weeks ago, a classmate who sat next to me asked me how long my paper was. I don't know what I was thinking about, but I said, "About an hour." And then she repeated herself, and I went "Oooooh."


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## Katiie (Apr 19, 2010)

Sometime when people are talking to me I start daydreaming (not listening to a word they say) but I continue to say 'yep' 'oh' 'mmmm' and smile and nod like I am listening.
Anyway, when my manager was going on about something, my mind started drifting off, and then he said something and I said "Yep" and was nodding, a couple of seconds later I realized he had gone silent and was just starring at me....so I was just starring at him....so we're just standing there starring at each other, with a confused look on our faces....and then he says quietly "um....so can u pass the stapler?"


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## changeforthebetter (Feb 15, 2011)

mimcofied said:


> This happens to me all the time..
> 
> They say "Hello" and then i say "good thanks"
> 
> ...


i can relate to this, i remember seeing a family friend in town once and they asked what i was doing etc, anyway when the conversation ended they said goodbye , and i replied thanks. wtf lol thanks for what, i think it is a natural reaction that i was thanking them for taking the time to talk to me or something i duno


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## JGreenwood (Jan 28, 2011)

I always get nervous around people in my office's birthdays. They always pass around cards for people to sign and I NEVER know what to put. So I usually just write "Happy Birthday!" and move on. 

Well, the other day a card was handed to me, I opened it, signed "Happy Birthday!" and passed it on. Little did I know it was a BEREAVEMENT card because one of my coworkers Father's had just passed from cancer.


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## Paris23 (Feb 20, 2011)

One of the weirdest things happened on the 1st day of my previous job. There wasn't any chair near my desk and i was on a mission to get a new comfy chair, but the lady from HR came to take me to MD's office to have a little discussion and on the way back she asked me "Have you met our chairperson?", i quickly said, "aaw you got a chairperson? I need a chair too!" same instant i knew i was talking bu****** and my face turned red, not sure whether she heard it or not, but anyway i covered it n laughed it off by saying i REALLY need a chair there! Although i felt like crap! :-|


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## DB9 MUFC (Feb 10, 2011)

Everything I say in a conversation is awkward. I can't think of things to say, so I say something stupid, or when I do speak my words come out wrong/in the wrong order making my sentences sound stupid or confusing to the other person :|​


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## takenimpulse (Nov 14, 2010)

Man, this thread is hilarious. I hope some of you are able to laugh at these awkward moments. I guess I'll have to share one.

I was supposed to start training for a new job and I needed to go to the customer service desk and ask for the manager of my department, Sharon Snow. For some inexplicable reason I blurted out, "Hi, I'm looking for Sharon Stone", paused for a second, "I MEAN... sharon snow". The woman couldn't stop laughing and said "she wishes". I was able to laugh it off myself. Good times.


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## JayC123 (Nov 3, 2010)

I nearly wet myself at some of these, i love you guys haha


I know how you all feel, i hate it when you are walking in the street trying to be normal and a sales person jumps out of no where into your face and tries to sell you something, it usually goes like this

Salesperson:"good morning sir could I..." 

(im still walking, faster and faster extreme anxiety mode now)

me: "sorry im busy"

salesperson: "ok sir, have a nice day"

me: "ok"

lol wtf? i hate me sometimes. Thank god i dont suffer anxiety as bad as those days anymore, ive some truly retarded moments in my time lol


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## changeforthebetter (Feb 15, 2011)

i remember getting pulled over for a breath test once and i was reciting over and over in my head my name and address, because that is what they always ask, so i roll down the window and the officer says 'can you just tell me your date of birth please' it caught me by surprise i was so prepared to say my name and adress so my response sounded something like this 'ahhh..... ummmm................ twenty.........' lol way to look supicious

another one i do frequently is 'you too'..... happy birthday 'you too...ahhh i mean ...yea...thanks'


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## Popularity (Dec 13, 2010)

Jennifer Clayton said:


> I can't think of the last embarassing thing, but I can think of something that happened a few days ago. I work at Chick-fil-A, I take people's money and I'm supposed to interact with them and whatnot. Okay, when someone says 'thank you', we are supposed to say 'my pleasure!' instead of 'you're welcome'. We never say 'you're welcome'. Well, I get so used to saying 'my pleasure' that some people will say 'have a good day', and I'll respond with 'my pleasure', instead of 'you too!' I always feel like a total idiot afterwards.


ha, I know someone who works there and said the same thing!


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## Memory (Mar 4, 2011)

I was at some fitness class today and a guy said to me, "Hi Katie, I'm Bob" and I said, "Hi I'm Katie." LOL It was so embarrassing.
I feel a little better now from reading other people's posts. Mine must sound just as amusing as everyone else's. 

Oh and the "Hello" "Hi. Good thanks" moments happen to me all the time. rofl


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## plastics (Apr 11, 2010)

Memory said:


> I was at some fitness class today and a guy said to me, "Hi Katie, I'm Bob" and I said, "Hi I'm Katie." LOL It was so embarrassing.


I do that all the time.

One time when I was younger (and I'm no better now haha), a bunch of us were setting off firework things on the street. The lady in the house called the police to come, because she didn't like us doing it. The cop goes "are they illegal fireworks?" or something like that, and of course looking at me, and no one answered, so I go "Yeah.", and then the people I was with I could hear them sighing in disgust, and then I said "I mean no." hahah I mean WTF for real. haha. They were legal fireworks. I remember the cop being a jerk, and like looking at me like I was stupid.


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## Emanresu (Jun 2, 2010)

Always thank you, I'm ALWAYS thanking people even when they should be thanking me!


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Emanresu said:


> Always thank you, I'm ALWAYS thanking people even when they should be thanking me!


...or even when what they say isn't something you would repond to with a thank you. :lol


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

^You're welcome!

I guess the last weird and awkward thing I said was at my cousin's wedding. At the end of the night I congratulated someone else. I was drunk, but I'm always that awkward.


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## izuhbelluh (Feb 25, 2011)

Aw, I'm LOLing at some of these because I've been in a lot of these situations myself.

I guess I thank people a lot. Like at the movies, especally after I buy my ticket and i hand it to the door person, and they rip it then go "ok, theater 12, to the left ejoy the movie" and I usually say "thanks, you too" 

One time my friend told me she got a B on her test and I replied with "oh thanks" because I thought she had said "I think you're going to get like, a B on the test" or somethign along the lines of that.


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## Emanresu (Jun 2, 2010)

millenniumman75 said:


> ...or even when what they say isn't something you would repond to with a thank you. :lol


Hahaha totally someone will say good-bye on the phone and I'll reply "thank you"


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## Salus (Feb 27, 2011)

Emanresu said:


> Always thank you, I'm ALWAYS thanking people even when they should be thanking me!


I thank people when they should be thanking me as well...

It's horrible if they don't thank you for something they should be, but instead it's you whos thanking them lol grrr


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## Downwiththesickness (Nov 13, 2010)

Today someone at the supermarket said "hi" and i said "good thanks" that was awkward. I do so many its hard to remember them all. Last week we had a garage sale and someone asked if we had any bikes and i said "ill just go check out the back" Like i owned a shop and had a stockroom or something when i knew we had no bikes...Im full of awkward suprises


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## Andrew1980 (Feb 28, 2009)

Your umbrella is pretty.


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## Downwiththesickness (Nov 13, 2010)

Also at work today I was talking to a girl and found out she came from the same town as me and i said "whats your last name i might know you" when she was in front of me and i clearly didnt know her...Maybe I have undiagnosed brain damage


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## Cosmic (Feb 7, 2011)

The accidental "I love you" is the worst.


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## wheels00 (Feb 24, 2011)

"Thanks Mum". When she's not your mother.


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## Shonen_Yo (Sep 8, 2006)

How about when someone has a bluetooth in their ear and you think they're talking to you. ****ing most embarrassing thing ever.


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## BetaBoy90 (Jan 5, 2010)

Heh, ok almost forgot about this. Yesterday at the Tim Horton's drive thru (coffee and donut shop) I ordered two large coffees. At the drive thru window the lady working there had a strong accent, and she asked me if I wanted a dray.... I said, "a what?".... "A Dray?"...... "Sorry, what?"... "A DRAY!!! Do you need a dray???"..... Finally she pointed to the cardboard drink trays. I was pretty embarassed, I probably apologized like 100 times within a 5 second span after I understood her. Gah, I hate not understanding peoples accents, I always feel like such an a-hole.


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## Music Man (Aug 22, 2009)

Shonen_Yo said:


> How about when someone has a bluetooth in their ear and you think they're talking to you. ****ing most embarrassing thing ever.


I've done that with someone near me, looking in my direction "you alright mate?"
"I'm ok thanks" - turns around and see his bluetooth embedded in his ear.

People who use them should have a bluetooth sign on their head saying "Don't reply to me, I'm on bluetooth". Either that or "I look like I'm talking to myself, which I probably am".



Emanresu said:


> Always thank you, I'm ALWAYS thanking people even when they should be thanking me!


I thank people for no reason, I feel stupid afterwards:

"How are you" - "thanks"
"thanks for lending me that" - "thanks"
"I'll see you later" - "thanks"


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## Freiheit (Dec 8, 2008)

This girl at school was standing next to me waiting for a class and it looked like she was talking to me because she was turned in my direction so I was like, "What?" And she was like, "I'm talking to Chelsea" And I noticed there was a girl off in the distance walking towards us and that's who she was talking to...I was pissed and I felt really retarded. Normally I wouldn't have said anything but I had situations that were opposite, where someone was talking to me but I didn't notice and accidentally ignored them...which also made me look retarded. Fml.


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## BKrakow (Jul 8, 2010)

was really tired at work yesterday so my powers of communication were considerably more pathetic than usual...I was walking down the hall and one of the bosses bumped into me and said "oh I'm sorry!" I wanted to say "it's okay" but also hadn't seen her before that so I thought I should say hi or good morning to her...so my brain kind of short circuited and I ended up being like, "oh it's ok...hi...no problem" rofl.


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## supersoshychick (Jun 4, 2009)

When I was getting off the elevator at school this lady in front of me said, you can go first, so i did and I said "It's okay" when I meant to say "Thank you"

When I went into the office around 1pm, i said "Good Morning" to my boss. I knew it was afternoon, but my thoughts got all fuked up


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## supersoshychick (Jun 4, 2009)

BetaBoy90 said:


> Heh, ok almost forgot about this. Yesterday at the Tim Horton's drive thru (coffee and donut shop) I ordered two large coffees. At the drive thru window the lady working there had a strong accent, and she asked me if I wanted a dray.... I said, "a what?".... "A Dray?"...... "Sorry, what?"... "A DRAY!!! Do you need a dray???"..... Finally she pointed to the cardboard drink trays. I was pretty embarassed, I probably apologized like 100 times within a 5 second span after I understood her. Gah, I hate not understanding peoples accents, I always feel like such an a-hole.


lol


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## supersoshychick (Jun 4, 2009)

LifeGoesOn said:


> :squeeze
> 
> I hate it when I say good-bye to someone, and then we start walking away in the same direction... it's SO awkward... so sometimes I wait to see which way they're going, and I'll purposely go the other direction even though I need to go where they're going, so then I make huge loop just to avoid walking away in the same direction... yes it's really awkward... :hide


oh gawd, that happened to me the other day :|


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## Stilla (May 13, 2009)

wheels00 said:


> "Thanks Mum". When she's not your mother.


:lol I did something similar. We had this gym teacher whom were talking to me and my friends because we weren't that motivated to have p.e. and he tried to give ME some sort of motivational speak. I guess on a subconscious level he reminded me about my dad the way he nagged at me so I go "Okay dad"
His facial expression was priceless, utterly shocked. Actually felt a little bad about it... 
But my friends laughed a lot at least. :no


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## JamieHasAnxiety (Feb 15, 2011)

(Need to know about me before I begin)

[I have bad eye vision, and not only that, but I dont have glasses at the moment.]

Ok, well, me and my X were leaving the olive garden, going back to our car, it was dark out, and I seen a large group of people walking towards me. I didnt know which car was which, and I seen the closest car that looked like ours and decided to basically 'luck out' and dive into the closest car hoping it was our car i was getting into.

and well, I got into the car and quickly sat down.

it wasnt our car...

I looked out to the left driver window in this strangers car and my X was looking at me like "What the hell are you doing!?"

.________.

I dun wanna talk about the rest. x,X


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

whiterabbit said:


> My neighbour accosted me just as I was turning the key in my door. He asked how things were going, blah blah blah, small talk...then "So what are you up to now?" "Oh, I'm just gonna go home" I said, standing in my own doorway.


:lol :squeeze

The "what are you up to" and "what's on for the weekend" questions throw me off big time. I'm like, "...Uh, I'm just gonna sleep."

Or I'll say stuff like, "I might go see a movie or go out for drinks," knowing all too well zero of this will happen. "I might" and "I was thinking of" are my favourite "I'm really doing nothing at all" cover-ups.


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## jijiji (Feb 5, 2011)

my friend sitting next to me asked some question about some assignment that i didn't hear because i was busy worrying about what everyone thought of me, and i sort of turned my head to the side for a split second and nodded very awkwardly......................................... i still have no idea what she said, but i know that this move was VERY awkward ... :doh


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## senrab (Apr 23, 2006)

"You look like a deer in the headlights!"


:sus :teeth


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## SuperSky (Feb 16, 2011)

Basically just a lot of "I dunno"'s.

Like... "Why don't you go to many parties?"... "Heh, I dunno."
Cooooool.


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## Smile_Karina (Nov 15, 2008)

I recently bought an iPod and as I was leaving the cashier said "enjoy it", I said "you too."

I do this one a lot. 
Me: "Hi how are you?"
Person: "Good, how are you?"
Me: "Good, how are you?"

And another time this girl asked me "do you mind if I borrow this?", I said yes. She just left.


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## buddyfed (Mar 26, 2010)

jennifer clayton said:


> people without sa screw up, too. They just typically don't obsess over it like we do. I hate acting like everything is a gazillion times worse than it is.


exactly.


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## MaddyRose (Dec 25, 2009)

The last couple times for me have been the exact same thing. I ask someone what's new, what they did on the weekend, whatever. They tell me and then don't reciprocate at all. So then I end up awkwardly/spontaneously telling them what I did, which is usually ignored. Awkward AND rude:mum


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## dolc12 (Mar 5, 2011)

Going to pharmacy to buy chromium picolinate. Rehearsing the line in my head while coming in. "Good day, do you have chromium picolinate, I want to regulate sugar levels?". 

I'm entering the pharmacy, and the show begins. "Good day, do you have chlor, I want to regulate sugar levels?". Pharmacist has a pale look, thinking god know what, and says no, we don't give out poisons just like that.

Probably thought I'm off to regulate suger levels for good.


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## changeforthebetter (Feb 15, 2011)

in class this morning i was passing on sheets to the next person and i said do you have these yet? then they sort of paused for a moment and said uhh no, of course they didnt have them, i was still holding the whole pile in my hand


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## 24butstayingpositive (Feb 17, 2011)

I have plenty of awkward moments. I do have the autopilot problem at times and someone on my birthday did actually say "happy bday" to me then i responded fully w/ a "happy birthday to you too" haha i felt like such a wierdo! But w/ practice on your own and preparing to know what to say for simple responses, this can go away after a while.

My bigger problems seem to be when I see someone I know on the street or worse, on campus (because you always see people you know on campus) and not sure if it's normal to just say hi and walk past by them or actually stop and have a quick conversation with them. Also, I see that a lot of people greet people with hugs (normally guys to girls and vice versa but not guys to guys) and my problem is when is it right to do this. As a guy, I obviously know to do it to girls (the few girls that I know in the world) but not sure if it's appropriate or not at the time and usually don't to prevent making a fool of myself. 

On a few occasions, I saw a girl I knew on campus, greeted her w/ a hug and did some small talk but realized I just saw her yesterday so that was way awkward and I could tell by the tone of her voice that she knew I was a wierdo. So I believe that you do this mainly only after you haven't seen someone for a while but what about in other situations when you're saying goodbye after an event, etc? 

And then the problem with not being sure whether to just say a quick hi or actually do some small talk that's troubling me. I suppose it has a lot to do with how well you know a person, if they're actually a good friend or an acquaintance, how long it's been since you've seen them last, etc. but to what degree?

Any advice please???


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## SilentWitness (Dec 27, 2009)

As I was leaving my house, my neighbour said 'Hi' and I said, 'Hi, how you going?',I kept on walking without even looking at them or waiting for a reply. Stupid me.


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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

24butstayingpositive said:


> I have plenty of awkward moments. I do have the autopilot problem at times and someone on my birthday did actually say "happy bday" to me then i responded fully w/ a "happy birthday to you too" haha i felt like such a wierdo! But w/ practice on your own and preparing to know what to say for simple responses, this can go away after a while.
> 
> My bigger problems seem to be when I see someone I know on the street or worse, on campus (because you always see people you know on campus) and not sure if it's normal to just say hi and walk past by them or actually stop and have a quick conversation with them. Also, I see that a lot of people greet people with hugs (normally guys to girls and vice versa but not guys to guys) and my problem is when is it right to do this. As a guy, I obviously know to do it to girls (the few girls that I know in the world) but not sure if it's appropriate or not at the time and usually don't to prevent making a fool of myself.
> 
> ...


Usually if it's just an acquaintance, I say a quick hi and keep walking, especially if I'm heading for class and don't have time to stop. I usually won't stop for a small chat unless it's a good friend that I haven't seen in a while. I never do hugs just because I'm not a "touchy-feely" person, but generally I'd say don't hug acquaintances, only good friends that you haven't seen in a while. If it's saying goodbye after an event, I'll just say something like "See ya, talk to you later" and leave, I never hug anyone unless they initiate the hug.

And I've also done the "happy birthday to you too" thing lol :lol


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## 24butstayingpositive (Feb 17, 2011)

Other problems that I'm completely clueless about and feel I've made a MAJOR fool of myself. Really embarrassing ****, especially when I initially didn't know it was embarrassing until I HEAR PEOPLE TALK BEHIND MY BACK ABOUT HOW AWKWARD I AM!!! Let me explain:

New years eve 2008-09. I'm desperate to go out for the night. I call/text some people and nobody responds back except 2 people who I wouldn't actually consider friends but just acquaintances. These were girls too, which is an extra itchy area that I have to be careful about because I'm most awkward and anxious around girls my age. I text them saying "hey what are you guys up to tonight?" They reply back "oh not much. Here's our address if you wanna come over. Let us know if you're coming". I get excited however keep in mind the last part "let us know if you're coming". I did let them know, however, they never texted back. I waited for an hr for the reply. No reply. 

It was 10:30 so it was getting late. I googled the address and I find out it was an hr's drive! I decide to risk it anyways and go. I arrive at the house. My heart is beating hard, wondering whether it's the right thing to go and knock on the door. I considered the following reasons why it's not right:

1) They don't know me very well. I'm not exactly friends with them.

2) They would think it is so weird for me to drive ONE HOUR to some people's house that I don't even know that well.

3) I replied back to the text saying I'm coming. But they never replied back. What if they didn't get the text? Probably drinking and having fun and not checking their phones. However, I'm really only partially invited to some people's house who I don't know that well and drove an hr to get to.

My one hope was that they were drunk and thus didn't care. 

I decide to risk it after sitting in my car for 20 mins. I go knock on the door. One girl answers and immediately I can tell by the tone of her voice that she thought this was a really awkward moment and said "ohhhh, heyyyyy, yeahhhh so what's up haha". Few mins later she pops the question "u never told us you were coming". I said "yes I did, check your phone". They saw it and just said "oh". So until midnight when the clock struck 2009 I did my best to hang out w/ a couple girls that I barely knew from college and I'm sure they thought it was weird for me to drive an hr to see them. One of them then asked "do you have other friends you can see tonight? Are we the only ones?" And I just make up some nonsense.

I leave, shut the door, and immediately hear both of'em talk behind my back: "WOW THAT WAS SOOO ****ING AWKWARD HOLY ****!!! THAT GUY IS WIERD! SERIOUSLY ONE TIME AT THIS PARTY HE WAS DOING BLAH BLAH BLAH AND ANOTHER TIME HE WAS LIKE BLAH BLAH BLAH....". 

A few days later, one of the girls deleted me from facebook. I never heard from both of them again.

It is amazing how the smallest things can be such a huge burden for us because we don't know the basic rules of being socially normal, etc. THIS is why I, like many of you i'm sure, dwell and dwell and overanalyze over these small things. It's **** like this that pisses me off. People always say "don't care what others think". But how can I not care what others think when I risk stuff like this happening? When I know the basic rules, THEN I will stop caring what others think but not until then.


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## ThisGuy (Jul 13, 2010)

I was walking with this girl down up to our floor, and talked to her briefly about how we never see the other people on our floor and how we all don't know each other. To keep the conversation going, I asked her before she got to her door if she "lived here full-time". Just because you never see her doesn't mean she's never here, lolz. What a stupid thing to say. :um


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## mflex09 (Mar 7, 2011)

well for me its very likely that i will either make a joke that falls flat, say something stupid or just inappropriate, or embarass myself in some other way.. lol i take it day by day.. i usually laugh it off eventually but the fact that my jokes fall flat sucks. lol


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## I Am Annie (Mar 8, 2011)

I had to get my student card the other day from uni. I hadn't been to an unfamiliar public place on my own for a few years. This is how my conversation went:
ID GUY: Would you like a smartrider or student card?
Me: ID
ID GUY: They are both forms of ID, which one would you like?
Me: Goodbye student thanks.
ID Guy:..... Okay a student card?
Me: Please yes thanks
ID Guy: Just stand here so we can take your picture
Me: Goodbye
*still has to get picture taken and fill out forms* 
I'm not even sure why I was saying bye??? 
I also stutter because I get flustered.


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## Takerofsouls (Oct 20, 2010)

Sometimes when someone says "Whats up?" I say "Whats up?" back.


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## tpsky (Mar 8, 2011)

Happy Birthday!"
"You too!"

You get the idea.

I'll go first. Someone was telling me about all the healthy eating they've been doing lately due to sickness. I said something along the lines of, "Your pee should be WHITE now." At least in this case it's someone who understands my humour enough to know I'm not genuinely interested in their pee colour, but it also got me thinking about how I would have probably said that to anybody and facepalmed five seconds later.

I hope somebody posts. 
I promise I won't ask about your pee.


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

Person: Hi, how are you?
Me: Yep.


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## Meres (Mar 8, 2011)

The manager of my apartment complex came up to check something that needed repairing. He walked in, looked around, took off his shoes before walking on the carpet and said, "Wow, you're really clean!" I replied, "Yeah, I just took a shower." Um...:roll


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## Smile_Karina (Nov 15, 2008)

I remembered another one.

There was a guy in my class who I did projects and school work with. One day we ran into each other somewhere and my sister was with me so the polite thing to do was to introduce her to him, but instead of telling the guy her name, I told him mine; "this is my sister Karina."


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## kamrynsays (Mar 4, 2011)

"I really love you baby."
"Cool."


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## ladylone (May 17, 2010)

Man these are so funny :hahaI do that whole thank you thing all the time. 

Well mine is I'll be in church or something and at the end of church we all greet each other. Well sometimes I end up greeting the same person a couple of times. I'll be like "Hey good to see you." and then five minutes later "Hi good to see you." And they look at me like I just saw you. Or when someone is trying to hug me, I just shake their hand, because I'm so used to just shaking people's hand. :hs What's worse is when you reach to shake someone's hand, and they don't see you, and then you look stupid. Or when you're trying to give someone a high five and they don't see you. So you're just hanging your hand in the air like a loser. It's like DENIED! :doh 
I've even had times when I yelled hey to someone and they didn't hear me, and it was in a public place like the mall. So everyone just stops and looks at the looser who just yelled hey out of nowhere.

Or when you I tried to enter a group conversation and no one was paying attention to my comments so I just awkwardly walk away. :lurk

Must I go on. Nah I think I'll leave it at that.


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## Smile_Karina (Nov 15, 2008)

I Am Annie said:


> I had to get my student card the other day from uni. I hadn't been to an unfamiliar public place on my own for a few years. This is how my conversation went:
> ID GUY: Would you like a smartrider or student card?
> Me: ID
> ID GUY: They are both forms of ID, which one would you like?
> ...


I must say this one is funny!!


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## crazyg (Jun 18, 2005)

I can totally relate to this. Somewhere along the line, I missed out on where these social rules were layed out...ha. Though, I've learned a few things over the years, I guess. For one thing, the whole hug/small talk thing pretty much is an individual by individual thing. So, some people will go in for the hug even after just having had one good conversation with you; while others would normally wait much longer.

I generally will only go for the hug if someone clearly initiates it. The small talk thing, I can be very awkward with. I think the biggest thing to remember really, just from observing other people, is to make a quick decision about what you'll do and do it with conviction. If you're going to do some small talk, be really upbeat about it, say a few quick things, ask a quick question or two and then say you have to get going to class, or wherever. It's the awkward pausing and the indecision that tends to make it a little awkward. If you're warm and pleasant, I think it should go over well.

I think you were right about the general rule about how often you see someone though. If it's someone you don't know that well and you just made small talk yesterday, a quick 'hi' and wave might suffice.

Also, I read your post about your New Years debacle (sorry if that was someone else) and since those people did actually invite you to their house, you shouldn't feel that bad about it. I can totally understand and I'm sure it was awkward...but if they didn't really want you to come, they shouldn't have given you their address.



24butstayingpositive said:


> I have plenty of awkward moments. I do have the autopilot problem at times and someone on my birthday did actually say "happy bday" to me then i responded fully w/ a "happy birthday to you too" haha i felt like such a wierdo! But w/ practice on your own and preparing to know what to say for simple responses, this can go away after a while.
> 
> My bigger problems seem to be when I see someone I know on the street or worse, on campus (because you always see people you know on campus) and not sure if it's normal to just say hi and walk past by them or actually stop and have a quick conversation with them. Also, I see that a lot of people greet people with hugs (normally guys to girls and vice versa but not guys to guys) and my problem is when is it right to do this. As a guy, I obviously know to do it to girls (the few girls that I know in the world) but not sure if it's appropriate or not at the time and usually don't to prevent making a fool of myself.
> 
> ...


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## BlabberGirl (Jul 18, 2010)

Lol! That is hilarious - I do stuff like that all the time. Can't think of anything specific right now...another lovely symptom. ha.


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## BlabberGirl (Jul 18, 2010)

Downwiththesickness said:


> Today someone at the supermarket said "hi" and i said "good thanks" that was awkward. I do so many its hard to remember them all. Last week we had a garage sale and someone asked if we had any bikes and i said "ill just go check out the back" Like i owned a shop and had a stockroom or something when i knew we had no bikes...Im full of awkward suprises


Meant to reply to Downwiththesickness' post. LOL...perfect example of my awkwardness!


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## Banzai (Jun 4, 2009)

A lot of the time when someone says something like "What's up", "how are you?", "you good?" as a greeting, I'll just reply "hi" (and even when I do reply properly, it'll be either a very blunt or sarcasticly-filled/pained "_good_")...not really out of SA but more of a CBA/nobody really cares thing.

Something out of SA though, one time, there were these two people who I was never going to see again (uni interview) and we were on our way out of the building and about to part ways, for whatever stupid reason, I said "see you later" at which one of them said, "sorry?" and thus was quickly corrected to "nice meeting you!".


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## THEuTASTEsOFeINKd (Apr 10, 2010)

Banzai said:


> A lot of the time when someone says something like "What's up", "how are you?", "you good?" as a greeting, I'll just reply "hi"


When I had roommates I use to do the same thing. They'd always say, "What you saying?" or "Yo, What up?" and I'd respond "Hey". :clap LMAO

I didn't put too much effort into getting to know them...


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## Shooterrr (Jul 19, 2009)

Today my professor saw me outside of class and said "Hey, how are you?" and I responded really quick with a "Hi, I'm god" :wtf I meant to say "good", but yeah... I'll just pretend he didn't hear that, lol.


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## Giraffe (Sep 7, 2010)

Cosmic said:


> The accidental "I love you" is the worst.


I live in fear of the accidental "I love you."


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## changeforthebetter (Feb 15, 2011)

Shooterrr said:


> Today my professor saw me outside of class and said "Hey, how are you?" and I responded really quick with a "Hi, I'm god" :wtf I meant to say "good", but yeah... I'll just pretend he didn't hear that, lol.


lol :rofl

Sometimes when someone says 'hi how are you?' i say 'good' and then i pause wondering what to say but i pause so long it becomes weird so then i just walk off thinking how rude it was not asking them how they were too.

at the start of the year we had to tell the class what subjects we were taking, i recited over and over in my head what i was going to say, then it came to my turn and i forgot one of them, so i told the whole class that i could not remember the other subject i was taking lol


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## salamoon (Mar 7, 2011)

Someone I know said "Roy" to someone, but I thought they said "alright?" so I responded with "yeah, thanks" then realised what they said and left.

I'm hoping they thought I was talking to someone else...


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

Me: "Hi there, how are you?"
Them: "Fine thanks, how are you?"
Me: "Good thank you, how are you?"

Somthing along the lines of:
Them: "Have a nice day and feel better."
Me: "You too."
(and I'm the one with the cold or something)

I really don't remember the last thing I said, but whateva.


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## Chivor (Mar 9, 2011)

Katiie said:


> Has anyone accidently said "good night" in stead of "good bye" to someone when they're leaving??


All the time.


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## Chivor (Mar 9, 2011)

There was a moment when I felt very brave and answered some guy in an elevator. 
I kept responding to his questions until he said "do you mind, i'm on the phone".

I got off the elevator about 3 floors early and took the stairs.


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## melissa75 (Feb 16, 2010)

I constantly say "thank you" even though they're the one needing to say thank you. For example, a co-worker calls me with a question, and I answer it. They say thank you, and I say you're welcome, thank you, okay bye! 

Last Saturday, I went to the gym and met with this trainer guy that is really cute. When the session ended, he said, "I'm looking forward to seeing you next time!" all charming and cute and stuff. I said, "Okay thanks" with my back turned to him while walking away. Gahhh, what's wrong with me?! I can't even say bye?


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## BenM55 (Jan 27, 2011)

A few recent ones:

Waitress: "Enjoy your meal."
Me: "You too."



Me: "Bye"
Woman on phone: "Good bye."
Me: "Ok, bye."


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## mattlol (Dec 25, 2010)

BenM55 said:


> A few recent ones:
> 
> Waitress: "Enjoy your meal."
> Me: "You too."
> ...


1st one was so funny


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## mflex09 (Mar 7, 2011)

LOL im laughing so hard because I can relate to every one of these posts LOL


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## Welchsboy (Dec 8, 2003)

Dude asked me whether we should go to my apartment to study or up to his apartment. Anatomy final. Well I was thinking about his apartment, it's on the top-most floor, so my reply was, "up yours". 

Might be good on socially awkward penguin...


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## puffins (Mar 9, 2011)

"thanks you! I mean thank, oops *giggle* I mean...*blankly staring* later!" yeah, i have finesse.


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## Shooterrr (Jul 19, 2009)

This thread is hilarious, lol.


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## TiredOfAnxiety (Mar 8, 2011)

Ohhh man there are so many awkward moments. I can think of a few of the biggest ones though

It was cold as crap outside and me and a few friends were going to the movies. One of my friends boyfriend drove us (a guy we had just met). I was sitting next to the door and as we got there I was in my head debating wether I should open the door now or not so I decided to just wait until my friend who was sitting onfront of me opened it. Like a minute later my friend who was next to me is like "Ummm can you open the door already?". That is probably the biggest awkward moment of them all

My first time cashing a check I went with my dad to the bank. Heres what happened:
Bank Teller: How do you want it?
Me: In cash
Bank Teller: Ermmm how exactly do you want it?
Me: All of it
Dad: (laughing) He means in what bills like 20s 100s etc
Me: Ohh in 20s

I also remember a friend introducing me to someone and the guy was like "Its nice meeting you" I responded "Alright good" instead of something like "It was nice meeting you too" lols

I feel as if I do something awkward daily


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## THEuTASTEsOFeINKd (Apr 10, 2010)

^ LOL

Today:

In liquor store, cashier wasn't at checkout so waited until she got there

Cashier: (Really excited and energetic) Oh sorry, I was just talking about the tim hortons and how blahblahblah.
Me: (WTF is she talking about...) Oh! haha. Thanks (and then I left with my booze...)

After finishing my midterm hoping I didn't see my lab partner outside but I did!

Lab partner: How'd it go?
Me: Good. How...
Lab partner: What 2 questions did you do out of the possible 4?
Me: Oh I did the muscle one and umm...
Lab partner: What was the other one.
Me: I'm trying to remember but I can't. hehe
Lab partner: blahblah
Me: ok well I'll cya later... (quickly walks away)
Lab partner: (as Im already far away) Take care! (didn't bother turning around)

I want to be my lab partner's friend but I'm too awkard X_X


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## Pangur Ban (Feb 2, 2011)

She: "How did you get that bruise?"

Me: "The ground." :doh


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## mooncake (Jan 29, 2008)

puffins said:


> "thanks you! I mean thank, oops *giggle* I mean...*blankly staring* later!" yeah, i have finesse.


I frequently say "thanks you" instead of thank you, or thanks, too. I always just hope they don't hear me properly (likely, since I tend to mumble everything anyway!). Most of the time I also jumble the words up in my sentences too, so making sense no end up whatsoever...


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## wishful thinker (Mar 13, 2011)

Downwiththesickness said:


> Today someone at the supermarket said "hi" and i said "good thanks" that was awkward. I do so many its hard to remember them all. Last week we had a garage sale and someone asked if we had any bikes and i said "ill just go check out the back" Like i owned a shop and had a stockroom or something when i knew we had no bikes...Im full of awkward suprises


Haha that line I'm full of awkward surprises made me lol. I totally know what you mean! I can be ok one minute and then say something totally random the next or just whatever is easiest to say just to get out of an uncomfortable or what I might think would be an uncomfortable conversation. Most of the time the other person won't think that much of it/read into it but we know it's weird/neurotic, I guess it's just something you have to accept eventually ;-)


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## wishful thinker (Mar 13, 2011)

Downwiththesickness said:


> Today someone at the supermarket said "hi" and i said "good thanks" that was awkward. I do so many its hard to remember them all. Last week we had a garage sale and someone asked if we had any bikes and i said "ill just go check out the back" Like i owned a shop and had a stockroom or something when i knew we had no bikes...Im full of awkward suprises





melissa75 said:


> I constantly say "thank you" even though they're the one needing to say thank you. For example, a co-worker calls me with a question, and I answer it. They say thank you, and I say you're welcome, thank you, okay bye!
> 
> Last Saturday, I went to the gym and met with this trainer guy that is really cute. When the session ended, he said, "I'm looking forward to seeing you next time!" all charming and cute and stuff. I said, "Okay thanks" with my back turned to him while walking away. Gahhh, what's wrong with me?! I can't even say bye?


Aww, I do that too. For me I just get anxious and my mind can draw a blank where I feel like I am the most unsocializled buffoon, that a monkey would have better social skills than me lol. When a guy makes me anxious cause he is cute or showing more attention then i'm used to and I like him I can sabotage it sometimes by acting weird or disinterested.


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## Mister Mxyzptlk (Feb 13, 2010)

I couldn't answer my tutor's question and i kept saying sorry instead of trying to figure out the answer. Ugh.


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## Think_For_Yourself (Dec 7, 2010)

I actually can't think of anything specific but you best believe they've happened a thousand times. A lot of my worst experiences are from work, and go something like this:

Him: So after you finish painting that cone, go and cut some steel bars for this top we're about to lay.

My mind: What did he say? Am I staring in his eyes too much? Should I have not just looked at the ground? Why is he staring at me? Should I respond right away, or should I ask him to repeat himself? If I ask him to repeat himself he'll probably get pissed. I'm just going to pretend I know what he said.

Me: Sounds great. I'll get right on it (while my voice pattern changes).



I end up forgetting my assignment completely.


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## crystaltears (Mar 10, 2011)

I dropped a piece of paper on the floor in a bus, someone picked it up for me and I said sorry instead of thank you 
=_=


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## Aphexfan (Jan 12, 2011)

Having to talk to my dad is an awkward mess


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

"Hi, how are you?"
"Fine, thanks. You?"
"Not too bad. You?"

D=


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

Welchsboy said:


> Dude asked me whether we should go to my apartment to study or up to his apartment. Anatomy final. Well I was thinking about his apartment, it's on the top-most floor, so my reply was, "up yours".
> 
> Might be good on socially awkward penguin...


|
You're a legend xD


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## jmw1112632 (Mar 8, 2011)

I love this thread! It makes me laugh because I've done pretty much all of these at one point or another. The best thing to do is if they notice, make a joke about it, or laugh/smile. It makes the situation a lot less awkward.



Emanresu said:


> Always thank you, I'm ALWAYS thanking people even when they should be thanking me!


Haha, I do this all the time. My friends were always getting after me for saying thank you so much even when it was unnecessary. haha


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## Daylight (Jun 20, 2009)

Lisa P- My dad got laid off from his job.

Me- I'm sorry to hear that. My mom has shingles.


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## LeftyFretz (Feb 12, 2011)

There's this sorta cute rocker chick who works at the liquor store who made fun of my band shirt a few weeks ago. It's like, alright I can go with this. This Friday I walk in and we both smile and whatnot. I get what I needed (err, wanted? bah) and we sorta talked a little. She bags my bottle of Jim Beam and says "Enjoy your Beam!" and of course like an idiot I say- "Oh, you too!" 


And yesterday when visiting my grandmother, when I left I wished her house keeper/ nurse lady a good night, despite it being 10AM.

I'll have to add to this as the week goes by. This is fun.


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## Squid24 (Nov 23, 2009)

changeforthebetter said:


> Sometimes when someone says 'hi how are you?' i say 'good' and then i pause wondering what to say but i pause so long it becomes weird so then i just walk off thinking how rude it was not asking them how they were too.


I do that often.

I always end phone conversations by repeating what the other person said. It works well with "bye" and the like, but sometimes I end up sounding really silly, it's stronger than me if they give the cue that the conversation is over I just repeat their last words and hang up. 
-ok I'll call him on his cell phone, bye
-ok I'l call him... bye

I also have a problem where my voice comes out as a whisper when I have to talk to strangers so I think in advance how I'm going to greet them and concentrate to speak loud enough. Last week the girl at the bookstore startled by saying "good day" and I answered with a loud, almost angry sounding "good evening". She thought I was correcting her :doh


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## Big M (Mar 13, 2011)

Some of these are too funny :lol

Although sometimes we say not so clever things because of SA we must remember that even people without SA say stupid things sometimes too. The only difference is that because we have SA we are always thinking about everything we are going to say, so than whenever it comes out wrong our 'script' (so to speak) has been changed because the person asks us what we said, or looks at us unusually. This throws us and we than kill ourselves for ages afterwards because of our 'unscripted reaction to it.

Whereas people without SA don't usually think in so much detail about the things they are going to say or the answers that they are going to give, because their reaction is natural. 

What's has helped me to overcome this is by breathing deeply on a daily basis. I know it sounds like something you would do when your about 5 but even I was surprised how well it worked. It helped me because whatever SA stress related problem came up i just sat down a took a few deep breaths until I felt calm. I found that under any problem that arose I was able to deal with it because of the calmness and patience which I had attained. Yet a few weeks ago I would be kicking myself for weeks by messing up a word in a conversation or saying goodnight instead of goodbye LOL. 

The key is to keep your cool, breathe deeply, & remember if you mess up its not the end of the world no one is perfect.


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## opethnpets (Dec 23, 2010)

I ran into an old high school friend (or more like an acquaintance) not too long ago. The conversation went like this ---

Friend: "Hey, what are you up to now?"

Me: "Uh, ummm, I don't know"

*Awkward silence*

Friend: "Well it was nice seeing you again."

Me: "You too"


I'm not really sure what to say to people I went to school with. They ask me what I'm doing, am I in college, or where I'm working now. I haven't accomplished anything since school, so I'm not really sure what to say. 





I also hate when I'm with my family, and I say something that I think is mildly amusing, they laugh, so I laugh too - but it turns out they're laughing at something someone else said/did in the room. That happens all the freaking time.


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## NikNak31 (Feb 25, 2011)

That awkward silence happens all the time for me, sometimes on dates too when I fly through the conversation topics due to nerves, trying to get a handle on my emotions while thinking silly paranoid thoughts. It's quite tough juggleing all this at once. Aftwards I'm like.... why did I say that! God I feel exhausted!!!.


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

I was at the grocery store rather early in the morning, around 4am, and one of the guys stocking shelves decided he wanted to talk to me while I was doing self-check.

Him: "how are you?"
Me: "good thanks, how are you?"
Him: "good."
I'm scanning my groceries and...
Him: "so are you waking up or going home?"
Me: "huh?"
Him: "waking up or going home?"
Me: "Oh, that's good."
Him: "no, are you just getting up or are you coming home from work."
Me: "Oh, I thought you were saying you were waking up from a fog and now you're going home." (I thought what he was saying sounded weird haha..that he was waking up and going home) "I'm just waking up."
Him: "well have a nice day at work."
Me: "thank you" (neither here nor there, but I am not currently employed) and then I stood there waiting for my receipt to print, when I hadn't even signed for my groceries "ugh" After I signed I waited painfully (I felt the need to move on quickly for some reason) for the receipt to print and then hurredly and akwardly pulled the receipt from its place. He got me all jumbled up. :S


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## daydreamer1 (Mar 16, 2011)

i have done so many of these!! i'm always saying 'sorry' even when the other person should be saying it instead.
the most embarrassing thing i've said was when my roommates' friend came to our room and asked if she wanted to go to the cinema later. she said she was busy, so he asked me instead. i was so shocked that i just said 'sorry i cant, i'm going to bed in a minute'- it was 4.30 in the afternoon. i could have died lol


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## Josie (Dec 8, 2008)

I hate when someone asks me how I am, because they're either using it as a greeting _or_ as a general question, and I have to guess which one they mean. Many times, I get it wrong. I'll start responding, "Good, how a--" only to notice that they've begun walking away to greet someone else. Or I'll just say hello, and then a few moments of silence later go, "Oh, you were actually asking... Good, you? ..."

When I lived with my parents, meeting my mom's friends was always awkward. She's deaf, and even though I could sign pretty well (on a conversational basis), she always loved bragging about how "awful" her life was and thus told all of her friends I didn't know sign language at all. So they would use their voice with me, and it would be really embarrassing because I always misunderstood them. My most frequent mistake was thinking they were asking for my age.
Her friend: How are you? (I heard "How old are you?")
Me (fumbling to remember the sign because I'm super nervous): 16 ... oh, 17.
He gives a questioning look to my mom and I.
Mom: What do you mean? He's asking how are you, not how old are you!!
Me: Oohh!! Haa... Sorry! ... Haahaa, I'm good, how are you... ?

I remember when my boyfriend and I went camping last year, we were at the campfire with his aunt's new boyfriend. He's into video games and he knew we were too.
Him: So what kind of games do you like?
Me: Uhh... Um. What do you mean?
Him: Uhh... Any kind of games?
I felt like such a moron. I just thought of all the different types of games, like board games, console games, PC games, and stuff that I couldn't tell if he was asking about the type of games I liked or specific game titles I liked. I just said the game title I liked most after that.


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## uhhhbrandon (Dec 21, 2010)

Chivor said:


> There was a moment when I felt very brave and answered some guy in an elevator.
> I kept responding to his questions until he said "do you mind, i'm on the phone".
> 
> I got off the elevator about 3 floors early and took the stairs.


LMAO! I've done this before, but then quickly realized they were using those headsets.


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## spacebound_rocketship (Nov 21, 2009)

Moms friend in the house: Hi *my name*, How are you? 
Me: :afr ops Goood *carries on walking to my room*


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

Driving Instructor - "I used to be in computer programming"

Me - "so what did you do before this?"

Driving Instructor - "I was in computer programming"


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## Aphexfan (Jan 12, 2011)

Had group work in my english class...me the entire time: Yes...uh huh...alright :afr


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

Standing in the bakery section of the grocery store earlier, a random bulky black dude says from behind me, "You don't need no sugar girl. You sweet enough already!"

Awkwardness ensues.

I know you girls all feel me here in not knowing what to reply with at all. I just kinda said, "Look at me," kicking out my leg lol, as if to say I'm too skinny I need meat on my bones. Wth. I have no idea.


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## Selwyn (Mar 16, 2011)

This:
http://www.slate.com/id/2287215/


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## ErichFranz (May 2, 2010)

I can't think of anything at the moment, but let's just say I identify with pretty much every socially awkward penguin.


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## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

IllusionOfHappiness said:


> Standing in the bakery section of the grocery store earlier, a random bulky black dude says from behind me, "You don't need no sugar girl. You sweet enough already!"
> 
> Awkwardness ensues.
> 
> I know you girls all feel me here in not knowing what to reply with at all. I just kinda said, "Look at me," kicking out my leg lol, as if to say I'm too skinny I need meat on my bones. Wth. I have no idea.


...:rofl:haha

...I'm sorry, I'm NOT laughing at you...really...I'm laughing at him.


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## Mae West (Sep 15, 2005)

I can't remember. I think I accused a guy I like of talking to another girl too much. Oh well won't do that again. I try to not dwell on past social failures and try to laugh them off! I learn from my "mistake" but I don't give myself too much grief for it. This helps to make me feel better about myself and move forward.


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## shymtealhead (Feb 16, 2010)

I work 3rd shift at a wal-mart so some cashiers and door greeters recognize my face often so if I buy something in the morning they will say something along the lines of "have a good night (cuz obviously I will sleep most of the day)" and of course without thinking I say "you too" back and right after a do I have a DURRR moment in my head....doesn't phase me but still gives me a pretty good chortle


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## Chris16 (Nov 1, 2010)

Someone else: "Hey Chris."

Me: "Hello."

*silence.*

That's the only awkward moment I ever have because my conversations never progress from that point. :b


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## minkoff (Mar 17, 2011)

This is so embarrassing...
One time in my Anatomy and Physiology class sombody stole a cell phone. So we all had to dump out our bags and get patted down. I accidently left something in my purse and when the policeman asked me why, I said I'm sorry mam. He was a guy.


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## izuhbelluh (Feb 25, 2011)

I babysat 2 of my neighbors kids today, and they were both sick. One, had a fever and their mom got home and the first part of the convo went like this:

their mom: hi, how are they feeling?
me:they're sick.
her:....

and then a bit later 

her: (as she hands me money) so thanks for babysitting on such short notice! how has your week been?
me: thank you so much!


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## minkoff (Mar 17, 2011)

Bestbuy: How may I help you?
Me: My computer charger is broken can you order a new one?
A few munites later as he enters info into the computer.......
Me again: Can you put a rush on it.
Bestbuy: Yes mam, I'm trying to hurry.

I was so embarassed I meant rush delivery.


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## roya (Nov 12, 2005)

im always acting politely to whom i was screwed up by.​


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## uhhhbrandon (Dec 21, 2010)

minkoff said:


> Bestbuy: How may I help you?
> Me: My computer charger is broken can you order a new one?
> A few munites later as he enters info into the computer.......
> Me again: Can you put a rush on it.
> ...


Lol, well at least you got your order done faster.


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## melissa75 (Feb 16, 2010)

I feel terrible right now about this:

I just went to the vet to pick up my dog, and this really short guy was standing there at the counter. My dog barked at him, and he was like, "whoa whoa WHOAAA, he's an aggressive little fella". I said, "yeah, he has short guy syndrome". :doh God, why did I have to say that? I meant "small dog mentality/syndrome or something" or maybe I could just keep my mouth shut. I literally ran out of there, and now I can't stop berating myself for it.


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## roya (Nov 12, 2005)

melissa75 said:


> I feel terrible right now about this:
> 
> I just went to the vet to pick up my dog, and this really short guy was standing there at the counter. My dog barked at him, and he was like, "whoa whoa WHOAAA, he's an aggressive little fella". I said, "yeah, he has short guy syndrome". :doh God, why did I have to say that? I meant "small dog mentality/syndrome or something" or maybe I could just keep my mouth shut. I literally ran out of there, and now I can't stop berating myself for it.


hahaha youre good!


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## trendyfool (Apr 11, 2010)

walking in the hall at school today, someone asks me if they can interview me.
me, coldly: "I don't really have any time for that."
person: looks offended.
as I walk away, I laugh.

I'M SO WEIRD MY GOD


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

At work a coworker says "Joe (boss) seems to like Marley."

I automatically presume Marley is referring to Bob Marley, where on earth I get that from I have no clue. I decide that was random and I won't reply, but after five seconds I feel like I should, so I say "Oh, he likes his music a lot or something?"

Coworker says "No... Marley is a customer."

Bleh felt so awkward. I always think people are talking about one thing when they are talking about something entirely different.


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

melissa75 said:


> I feel terrible right now about this:
> 
> I just went to the vet to pick up my dog, and this really short guy was standing there at the counter. My dog barked at him, and he was like, "whoa whoa WHOAAA, he's an aggressive little fella". I said, "yeah, he has short guy syndrome". :doh God, why did I have to say that? I meant "small dog mentality/syndrome or something" or maybe I could just keep my mouth shut. I literally ran out of there, and now I can't stop berating myself for it.


Oh my :lol


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## frillylove (Sep 11, 2010)

Josie said:


> I hate when someone asks me how I am, because they're either using it as a greeting _or_ as a general question, and I have to guess which one they mean. Many times, I get it wrong. I'll start responding, "Good, how a--" only to notice that they've begun walking away to greet someone else. Or I'll just say hello, and then a few moments of silence later go, "Oh, you were actually asking... Good, you?"


This is so relevant to my life.


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## Selwyn (Mar 16, 2011)

ladylone said:


> Man these are so funny :hahaI do that whole thank you thing all the time.
> 
> Or when you I tried to enter a group conversation and no one was paying attention to my comments so I just awkwardly walk away. :lurk
> 
> Must I go on. Nah I think I'll leave it at that.


I LOVE that animation with the smiley awkwardly walking away. It's perfect! It totally captures the feeling. Which happens to me all the time.


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## BetaBoy90 (Jan 5, 2010)

It wasn't due to anxiety, but it made me anxious and feeling embarassed afterwards. Both my grandmothers have the same first name, Patricia, and today it was one of their birthdays. I called the one who's birthday it was and decided when either my grandma or grandpa answered I'd ask in a weird accent if I could speak to Patricia, just for a laugh. So anyways, my Grandpa picked up the phone, decided to stick to the plan and in a weird voice said "Is Patricia ______ there?" He said no, so I said it again for some dumb reason because I wasn't thinking clearly "Is Patricia ______ there?" "Nope, I'm afraid you have the wrong number". So I just decided to come clean and tell my Grandpa it was me (I figured he thought I was a telemarketer or something). Turns out I was asking him to speak to my other Grandmother rather than his wife the whole time...... I felt like such a fool.


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## whataaaaaa (Nov 6, 2009)

It was the first week of college and i was walking down the hallway to the elevator. There was a guy and a girl standing at the end of the hall and they just stopped talking and looked at me as i approached. The guy held up his hand to give me a high five as i approached, i thought he was going to introduce himself by saying his name but instead he just said "Hey" and i replied, "Jason" (my name) as i slapped his hand. As i walked away i could hear the girl laughing extremely loud.


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## barry2010 (Jun 16, 2010)

stroke me satan i meant to say hi


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

Background: My driving instructor is Irish so naturally we discussed St. Patricks Day during the lesson...fastforward to a while after it was mentioned

Driving Instructor: Look at that guy, his hair is coloured green, I'd do that but I don't have my hair anymore

Me: Why? Did you used to be a rocker or something?

Driving Instructor(looks at me funny): It's St. Patricks Day

Me: Oh yeah


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## izuhbelluh (Feb 25, 2011)

At the temp angency today I was so frickin nervous and when walking up to the receptionist lady after she said hi i said...

me: hello... I'm looking for a job.
her: okay, what kind of a job?
me: a job... 
her: do you have any work experience?
me: i have a resume
her: oh
so I hand her the resume, and she looks it over and sees my name at the top, and she goes
her: okay, Isabella, so you do have work experience
me: thank you 

I was so embarassed after I said thank you. I'm glad it wasn't a real interview or anything!


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## Samibeee (Mar 18, 2011)

I actually did something really awkward today.. no surprise haha
My part time work involves phoning overdue patients at a dental practice and booking them in for checkups and today i'd phoned someone and i'd said 'Is this mr wilson speaking?' to which the person replied yeah to and something like 10 mins later (after i'd updated details etc) i said 'so shall i book yourself and mrs vallance in?'. i then experienced a really awkward silence and the supposed 'mr wilson' replied by saying 'uhhh... this is mrs.vallance' hahahah! :b


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## Wolfen (Apr 26, 2004)

Saying to a woman : "You don't mind that I'm not talking to you, do you?" :um


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## f ii o r e ll a (Jan 20, 2011)

These are quite funny hee hee.

I know I say a lot of awkward things, most which I can't remember or I try to push out of my mind. I know one time I said something to someone which probably made them think I wasn't straight (which I am). It sounded a little perverted too, I didn't mean to. Though I can't remember exactly what I said -_-;; . 
Actually, I remember there was a time I accidentally called my teacher 'mum'.

Usually, because I'm terrible at coming up with responses, I just laugh. One time I accidentally laughed at what someone said to me, later I realised they were actually asking me a question and was expecting a reply. They weren't telling me a joke. 
*embarrassed*


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## Banzai (Jun 4, 2009)

I dont know if it's to do with SA but I always seem to mishear things. I think maybe it's because I can't/dont lip read and/or I tend to absent mindedly listen into conversations. Or something like that.

Friend: I don't like i-[something]
Me: What?! Did you just say you don't like "Indians"? 
Friend: No...I said "idiots".


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## DistinctlyAmbiguous (Aug 23, 2009)

A bank teller asked me what I had planned for the rest of the day. I said "hopefully a nice nap." When the transaction was over, she said "enjoy your nap," and regretfully I said, "You too."


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## DistinctlyAmbiguous (Aug 23, 2009)

Banzai said:


> I dont know if it's to do with SA but I always seem to mishear things. I think maybe it's because I can't/dont lip read and/or I tend to absent mindedly listen into conversations. Or something like that.
> 
> Friend: I don't like i-[something]
> Me: What?! Did you just say you don't like "Indians"?
> Friend: No...I said "idiots".


I've always wondered this, but I know I've always been a little nervous in these verbal situations. I think it might be a good idea to get hearing checked especially if you listen to or play loud music just to rule that out.


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## Fury 0f Osiris (Jan 5, 2011)

Older co-worker asking me about my fraternal twin brother. Im 6'4" and the co-worker is pretty short.

Him: "So is your twin just as tall as you?"
Me: "No, not really. Actually he is really short"
Me: . . . .
Me: (without thinking at all)"Ya, he is about the same height as you"


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## 390 (Jul 29, 2010)

At a game of poker (with complete strangers):

Me: *Wins with a straight - a flush and full house were possible*
Opponent: *Reveals 3 of a kind*
Me: I was only blushing. *starts blushing because I had meant to say bluffing*


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## Wolfen (Apr 26, 2004)

DistinctlyAmbiguous said:


> A bank teller asked me what I had planned for the rest of the day. I said "hopefully a nice nap." When the transaction was over, she said "enjoy your nap," and regretfully I said, "You too."


Quality. :lol


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## Wirt (Jan 16, 2009)

There was a birthday gathering at work that I pretended to not know what was going on. And I was glad i skipped it when hearing a bunch of people in a small room singing happy birthday. 

To avoid any awkwardness I was going to slip out on a 10 minute break till people went back to their desks.

As i walked out, the person that organized the party caught me and was like "you dont want any cake?" in a 'my feelings are hurt' tone..so i meekly and stumblingly said 'oh..i... wasnt sure where the party was' even though it was obvious everyone was right around the corner from me

that was nice...


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

trendyfool said:


> walking in the hall at school today, someone asks me if they can interview me.
> me, coldly: "I don't really have any time for that."
> person: looks offended.
> as I walk away, I laugh.
> ...


Hahaha nice, man, nice.

Conversing: a skill many of us have not yet mastered. You'll get there.

Asking to interview you, though? That's not just like asking you what time of day it is. I'm sure the person got boatloads of answers they weren't pleased with.


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## sobeit (Mar 18, 2011)

Said **** you to someone, yea bad choice.


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## Selwyn (Mar 16, 2011)

Has anyone ever not quite made up their mind ahead of time and said, 

"Thanks you"?

I've done that a few times.:roll


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## MrSoloDolo123 (Aug 2, 2010)

other person: "hey"
me: "good"

-.-


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## DankBliss (Mar 20, 2011)

I will say "Thats cool" too much when trying to talk and have a conversation.

A new neighbor of mine was telling me how his friend had died of an OD at 16years old and I told him "Thats cool"..........


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

DankBliss said:


> I will say "Thats cool" too much when trying to talk and have a conversation.
> 
> A new neighbor of mine was telling me how his friend had died of an OD at 16years old and I told him "Thats cool"..........


Ouch.

I do that with the word "yeah". The person I'm talking to will be saying a bunch of things that "yeah" applies to, then say something like, "you know that movie X?"
"yeah - I mean..no, no I don't."

I once pretended I knew what movie my friend was talking about and it was rather obvious I was making it up.

"Remember the part when blah blah blah?"
"Yeah, sure."
"What was your favourite part?"
"Uhmmm I dunno it's hard to choose..."

ops


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## miminka (May 10, 2009)

I was at my mother's workplace a few weeks ago and I walked into the kitchen. Sitting at the table were a couple of girls from my school. I was standing between two refrigerators and I stood there frozen in shock at the sight of them. I opened the one fridge, peered into it, closed the door and all the while they're still staring at me. I said awkwardly, "Um do you know if there's water in the other fridge?" Meanwhile I could have just opened it and checked, I was less then a foot away from it. They slowly resumed their conversation, I settled for tap water, gulped down my cough syrup as fast as possible and dashed out of there.


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## hello trixie (Mar 15, 2011)

Jennifer Clayton said:


> I hate acting like everything is a gazillion times worse than it is.


Me too. I know I'm doing it also, which makes it even harder to cope with because I frustrated I can make it stop.

Today, I held the door for a lady running for the elevator and she said "Thank you." I managed to get it right and say "You're welcome." However, I hate elevators and I hate being closed in a small space with a stranger even more, even if she did seem nice. So, I proceeded to tell her that "It has been a long time since I've been in an elevator like this." Nice.

What I was trying to say was that it had been a long time since I was in a building so tall you had to get into an elevator based on which floor you want - they don't all go to every floor. But, since I am a quivering, nervous pile of a girl I acted like a freak. I was upset about it all morning. Like she cares, and even if she did, I'm never going to see that person again. At least I can laugh at myself a little.


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## Adam H (Mar 21, 2011)

Professor - So when do you work most?
Me - The weekends
Professor - Can you be more specific?
Me - Saturday and Sunday.


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

Adam H said:


> Professor - So when do you work most?
> Me - The weekends
> Professor - Can you be more specific?
> Me - Saturday and Sunday.


Haha. I won't lie I would have said the exact same thing here.

I guess he meant aside from the weekends and what hours and stuff...but still. I don't always think before I talk.


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## hitthelights (Feb 21, 2011)

:sigh"Do i smell bad?" I thought everyone was backing away from me...


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## polardude18 (Oct 13, 2009)

The other day I was at a convention with my sister and someone from our group of people was sitting on a bench and said 'why don't you both come sit with me I don't bite' and I sat down and said 'Oh I do' and I now wonder why in the world I said that, it was a really dumb thing to say, thank you anxiety.


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## noyadefleur (Oct 26, 2010)

This wasn't actually me, but it qualifies and I found it really funny. This happened today in class;

Friend: What are you listening to?
Me: Oh, Neon Trees.
Friend: Awesome! I love Neon Trees, they're like, my band.
Me: Oh cool, what's your favorite song?
Friend: ... I don't know, really.
Me: *laughing* I thought you said they were "your band"?
Friend: Well they're not really _my _band.

xD That made my morning.


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## mus (Feb 28, 2011)

I was talking to a friend about how, at my old job as a dog groomer, I saw this one particular dog whose feet were stained yellow with urine, and you just knew that he was kept in a crate all day (sad). Except I said that he was kept in a crepe all day. haha.


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## voospenvi2734 (Dec 2, 2010)

One time I was getting a ride home with 2 of my friends. I was in the backseat, and they were in front. They had the music on really loud, so they kind of had to yell to talk to each other. They were talking the whole car ride. We had been driving for like 20 minutes, and I still hadn't said anything. Desperate to participate in the conversation, I listened to what they were saying for a second. I heard something about waking up late on weekends, so immediately, I interupt them both in the middle of their conversation to yell (above the music), "Yeah, I usually don't bathe on the weekends!" Just as I was finishing this, the song ended, and a veeeeery long awkward silence filled the car during the silence between the songs. Luckily, they just ignored me and went back to their conversation, but I didnt try joining in again.


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## vash (Aug 16, 2010)

I had many, but the one i currently remember is when I was done getting my hair cut, the lady said, "have a good ride home" and I replied, "you too". Then she said, "I'm not going anywhere". =/


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## vicki (Mar 21, 2011)

i always end up repeating what the other person just said because i am too busy panicking to actually hear what they are saying. i am always saying "no problem" to everything. how are you? no problem! would you like a coffee?? no problem!! drives me bonkers!!


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## bobalo (Mar 19, 2011)

The waitress said soup or salad? I say ok. [supper salad]I dont know.


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## THEuTASTEsOFeINKd (Apr 10, 2010)

I talked to my lab partner before our lab exam. After the lab exam he was walking 20 feet in front me in the hall. He went to pick something up so I knew I had to walk by him. *First*, I walked into a room that I thought was a stairwell to try and avoid him. *Secondly*, he ended up running into a friend and they started talking so I finally caught up to them and stopped for a second to wait till there was a pause so I could ask him how the exam went. The chance didn't arise and he never even acknowledged that I'd walked up to him. So I just started walking away not having said a word. *Thirdly*, I heard him say "hey, how'd it go?" so I stopped and turned around to look back at him and start walking towards him but he was talking to his friend so I quickly turned back around and walked away embarassed and ashamed. He didn't even look at me once the whole time!!!

It wasn't that I said anything awkward but more that I didn't say anything at all.:mum


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## Donnie in the Dark (Mar 15, 2011)

IllusionOfHappiness said:


> Ouch.
> 
> I once pretended I knew what movie my friend was talking about and it was rather obvious I was making it up.
> 
> ...


 Aaarrgghhh, I am always doing that. WHy? Why do I do it? What would be the big problem with me just saying "Haven't seen it" ? :roll:no


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## uhhhbrandon (Dec 21, 2010)

whataaaaaa said:


> It was the first week of college and i was walking down the hallway to the elevator. There was a guy and a girl standing at the end of the hall and they just stopped talking and looked at me as i approached. The guy held up his hand to give me a high five as i approached, i thought he was going to introduce himself by saying his name but instead he just said "Hey" and i replied, "Jason" (my name) as i slapped his hand. As i walked away i could hear the girl laughing extremely loud.


I don't why, but I can picture something like this happening in TV show or something. lol


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## Aly (Nov 30, 2010)

i always laugh at something that isn't even funny.. 
for example, yesterday in gym someone elbowed me and asked if i was okay(that was like the 3rd time they did that) and i just laughed ._. 
i felt like an idiot after that.


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## LisaLisa (Mar 21, 2011)

LOL Oh man I've done all of the above. I get so tongue tied, and sometimes it probably comes across as if I'm a total idiot. 

This happened today at work. "What time is it?" my reply "Good thanks." LOL wow I felt like an a**.


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

minkoff said:


> This is so embarrassing...
> One time in my Anatomy and Physiology class sombody stole a cell phone. So we all had to dump out our bags and get patted down. I accidently left something in my purse and when the policeman asked me why, I said I'm sorry mam. He was a guy.


The evil part of me laughs. heh heh heh heh (and not at you)


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## sugarcane (Feb 20, 2011)

shanny086 said:


> this happens to me too. the WORST is when someone is waving or smiling and you think its to you and you respond and then realize its to the person behind you. i hate that!


This happenend to at least 4/5 times with the same person! :um

Someone misheard my name wrong in college once and thought I said my name was Avril and I just went along with it lol.


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## sherbert (Jun 24, 2005)

In my career counseling class, we were practicing interviews in groups of four. When it came to my turn, I revealed that "I didn't think I was a leader, but was more autocratic" and that "I have a hard time selling myself". The guy asking the question said, "OKKK" in a puzzled manner. In retrospect, I guess it isn't that damning, but I cannot imagine saying those things in an actual interview.


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

daydreamer1 said:


> i have done so many of these!! i'm always saying 'sorry' even when the other person should be saying it instead.
> the most embarrassing thing i've said was when my roommates' friend came to our room and asked if she wanted to go to the cinema later. she said she was busy, so he asked me instead. i was so shocked that i just said 'sorry i cant, i'm going to bed in a minute'- it was 4.30 in the afternoon. i could have died lol


DENIED! Ouch lol.


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## EndlessHope (Mar 2, 2011)

today in a course im in, we had to use name tags. I ripped off the sticky name tag without putting my name on it, and then i tried to save face by attempting to write my name on it while it was already on my chest, and i started writing it backward so i stopped and made a new one. 

Everyone saw and laughed.

Yup, Im actually very intelligent, my social timidity lowers my iq by like 50 points.


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## trendyfool (Apr 11, 2010)

Okay, sometimes I tell stories that I think are funny but possibly are just weird? For example:

in school today people were talking about dreams. I then excitedly related a dream I had last night, in which I got an F, a B and an A in three different classes...but it was all good, because in the dream, the letters spelled out "FAB", so everything was just fabulous! But after I told the story someone gave me a weird look...haha. I thought it was funny


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## trendyfool (Apr 11, 2010)

polardude18 said:


> The other day I was at a convention with my sister and someone from our group of people was sitting on a bench and said 'why don't you both come sit with me I don't bite' and I sat down and said 'Oh I do' and I now wonder why in the world I said that, it was a really dumb thing to say, thank you anxiety.


HAHAHAHAH. that's awesome.


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## voospenvi2734 (Dec 2, 2010)

bobalo said:


> The waitress said soup or salad? I say ok. [supper salad]I dont know.


Bwahahhahaha *super salad* ahahahahahahahahah! 

No offense


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## Bathory (Dec 26, 2010)

I'm only on the second page, but I've already laughed so hard I've had tears in my eyes. I think it's safe to say I love this thread. Ok, back to reading!


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## Bathory (Dec 26, 2010)

takenimpulse said:


> Man, this thread is hilarious. I hope some of you are able to laugh at these awkward moments. I guess I'll have to share one.
> 
> I was supposed to start training for a new job and I needed to go to the customer service desk and ask for the manager of my department, Sharon Snow. For some inexplicable reason I blurted out, "Hi, I'm looking for Sharon Stone", paused for a second, "I MEAN... sharon snow". The woman couldn't stop laughing and said "she wishes". I was able to laugh it off myself. Good times.


Oooh, this one reminded me of back when I was in college, standing in front of class discussing a poem by Robert Frost. I was nervous and couldn't even really tell what I was saying, and I kept calling him Jack Frost. Eventually, the professor corrected me and I was mortified, but I was just sorta like "oh".....then I finished my poem and sat down. That was over 15 years ago and I still wish I could forget it!


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## Bathory (Dec 26, 2010)

changeforthebetter said:


> lol :rofl
> 
> Sometimes when someone says 'hi how are you?' i say 'good' and then i pause wondering what to say but i pause so long it becomes weird so then i just walk off thinking how rude it was not asking them how they were too.


I do something like this, and I sometimes wonder if I'm coming off rude. I don't mean to! Someone will say "Hey, how are you?", and I say "Just fine", with a smile on my face. But that's it--I don't ask them how they are. Like I said, I'm definitely not trying to be rude, but saying "fine" and then asking them the same thing just seems so fake and awkward to me. I don't do small talk well at all. And I've gotten so used to saying it that now it just pops out automatically, even though I do want to try to make the effort to ask them how they are in return.


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## Love Minus Zero (Mar 23, 2011)

I read the entire thread, it's hilarious.

When I was at a job interview the manager (who also does EMT work. I guess? I never really asked about it). Anyways, he saw where I lived and said:

Him: Oh, I do a lot of EMS runs down that road.
Me: Oh.
Him: What?
Me: Umm...that's good.
Him: ...oookay. (and then stops talking to me)

And then I have this problem where I'll get super nervous and start replacing words with other ones. Like, I'll mean to say: "I'm taking a break" but instead it'll come out: "I'm taking a bath." haha.


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

Love Minus Zero said:


> I read the entire thread, it's hilarious.
> 
> When I was at a job interview the manager (who also does EMT work. I guess? I never really asked about it). Anyways, he saw where I lived and said:
> 
> ...


:lol

&glad you are enjoying the thread.
As am I!


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

This guy I liked told me he missed me and my mouth went "Yeah, whatever"
 @#%%^#@@ !!! Stupid panic-tongue! :mum


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## hitthelights (Feb 21, 2011)

I told my music teacher I didn't like to be around people.


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## voospenvi2734 (Dec 2, 2010)

Any time the teacher calls me out in the middle of class for not doing the problem, or playing on my iPod. I hate that


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## MrSoloDolo123 (Aug 2, 2010)

i embrace the awkward moments, i just laugh em off and pretend i said it on purpose as a stupid attempt at being funny.


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## Fantas Eyes (Mar 23, 2011)

I never say anything stupid; I just get awkward pauses. I feel like a jerk for not asking the other person anything.


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## CrazyCatLady (Feb 8, 2011)

I do say "thank you" even when I shouldn't. I do find that saying "good morning" in the evening or "Hi", "Fine Thanks" are actually fairly common among everyone, not just the socially awkward. It tends to get more common later in the week as people are tired.

I ALWAYS answer "how are you?" with "I'm good, how're you?" this can lead to some awkward situations like when I initiated it with "How are you?" "Good, yourself?" "I'm good, how're you? Err..nevermind..."

I also have a tendency to say "cool" which is not good when someone tells you something bad that has happened. 

There is a really good one somewhere in the back of my mind that I just can't seem to remember right now. I'll post it if it comes to me.


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

CrazyCatLady said:


> I do say "thank you" even when I shouldn't. I do find that saying "good morning" in the evening or "Hi", "Fine Thanks" are actually fairly common among everyone, not just the socially awkward. It tends to get more common later in the week as people are tired.


I find this, too. People without SA lose their sense of time as well, and mix up such routine small talk questions like, "how are you?"


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## Cynae (Mar 24, 2011)

Usually my problem with people I don't know much about is this.

*Them:* Hi!
*Me:* ....Hi...
*Them:* How are you?
*Me:* Okay, and you?
*Them:* Fine.
*-Silence* during which I'm trying to think of something to say and not come off like an idiot *ensues-*
And then the moment I'm about open my mouth they walk away.

Or when people greet me with "*'Sup?*" and I don't know if I'm supposed to answer with "*Hi*" or "*Fine, you?*"


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## CrazyCatLady (Feb 8, 2011)

Cynae said:


> Usually my problem with people I don't know much about is this.
> 
> *Them:* Hi!
> *Me:* ....Hi...
> ...


Try "Nothing much, you?" also "hey" would be acceptable.


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## alte (Sep 4, 2010)

Me: Hi Dr. C, can you fill out this evaluation for me?
Dr. C: Yeah, I was looking for it. *extends hand presumably to take evaluation form*
Me: *shakes extended hand, then realizes mistake, awkwardly withdraws and hands paper*


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## usernamegoeshere (Mar 27, 2011)

This thread makes me happy.

Aside from identifying with a lot of what's been said, one of my favourite cockups (not a verbal one but somewhat related) is when shaking someone's hand, slipping up and just settling for some random part, like just grabbing their thumb. Sometimes they're not actually even trying to shake my hand.

Accidentally using words that sound or look the same but mean something entirely different is always fun. Or not quite catching what someone says and just giving a non-committal smile, grimace, nod or agreement like "mmm".

Good times.


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## Love Minus Zero (Mar 23, 2011)

Last night I just realized that I respond to things with a laugh and a "yeah" - even if it's not appropriate.

Like last night my coworker said:
"Have a good Sunday off."
and I went "Hahaha...yeah."

Which just makes me look like I'm about to do something suspicious. 
Nervous laugh, I think?


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## supersoshychick (Jun 4, 2009)

Smarties said:


> Sometimes when someone says "Whats up?" I say "Whats up?" back.


That's why I don't say that grrrrrr. idk what it means........


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## caflme (Jun 7, 2009)

When taken out to dinner: I can't eat here... there's too much noise and too many people.


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## Slogger (Dec 14, 2010)

Shortly after I was hired, a coworker returned from a Hawaiian vacation with a box of chocolate covered macadamia nuts. A few of us, were enjoying them, when my boss walked by. BTW, he was a rather rigid, formal guy who kept his distance from his employees. Anyway, he said he liked macadamia nuts but didn't like chocolate. I blurted out, "Well, I'd be happy to suck the chocolate off your...", and I stopped at that point, mortified. I tried to laugh it off as everyone stood around looking extremely uncomfortable.


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## Slogger (Dec 14, 2010)

Big M said:


> What's has helped me to overcome this is by breathing deeply on a daily basis. I know it sounds like something you would do when your about 5 but even I was surprised how well it worked.


This helps me, too. It helps me keep my mouth shut when I'm tempted to say something that's only vaguely related to the conversation, and it opens my mind to more appropriate things to say.


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## bobalo (Mar 19, 2011)

Dustii7 said:


> Bwahahhahaha *super salad* ahahahahahahahahah!
> 
> No offense


 you should know by now people with SAD are easily offended.:no


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## introvert33 (Jun 23, 2010)

The other day it was not "thank you," or "thanks," but "thanks you"

I agree this thread is awesome, it keeps me laughing, and I have definitely made many similar mistakes.


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## atticusfinch (Dec 18, 2010)

introvert33 said:


> The other day it was not "thank you," or "thanks," but "thanks you"


awwe


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## SilentWitness (Dec 27, 2009)

At checkout at dollar type store-

Guy- *mumbles*
Me- "I'm good, thanks"
Guy- (shows me bag) Uhhh...
Me- "oh, sorry, I thought you were asking how I am?"
Guy-(smiling) nah, just if you want a bag.
Me-Yes... thanks.

( I think it was awkward for the both of us.) :lol


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## mebackwardz (Mar 29, 2011)

These responses are all so funny!

I work at a store where customer service is #1 priority, so I spend all day making conversations with total strangers. Isn't that just perfect :roll

Anyways, sometimes customers will say something witty and look at me expecting some kind of response. A lot of times I don't quite catch what they say, so I will have no clue what to say in return... AWKWARD.

When people ask me questions I get really caught of guard and I will be thinking of two different ways to answer them. Instead, what comes out is a really awkward combination of the two things I was trying to say :sus


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## alte (Sep 4, 2010)

Bank employee: Welcome to US bank
Me: Excuse me
Bank employee: Welcome to US bank
Me: Sorry, I do not understand *goes up closer*
Bank employee: Welcome to US bank
Me: Oh

o_o


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

"Congratulations on the wedding"


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## sugarcane (Feb 20, 2011)

Sister: Good Morning 
Me:Thanks
:teeth


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## puffins (Mar 9, 2011)

hahahahaha slogger...reminds me of work a couple years ago (me, debt collector, talking to customer) 'okay, i understand, ill see what i can do on you, i mean do to you, i mean do for you'. My boss and coworkers laughed for weeks.


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## CleverKrolik (Mar 25, 2011)

Went to a new doctor for a second opinion. Woman's doctor mind you. He did the exam and then stood there talking to me when he was done talking he held out his hand. 
I said. "You want me to give you a high five after all that?"
Doctor said, "Um, no. I was going to help you down from the table."


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## voospenvi2734 (Dec 2, 2010)

bobalo said:


> you should know by now people with SAD are easily offended.:no


Seriously don't be offended, I only find it funny because I could easily see myself doing the same thing. I'm not bahahahahahahahing at you, I'm bahahahahahahing with you.


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## aimi12 (Aug 8, 2010)

whenever someone is talking to me, i'm always muttering things like "yeah", "ok", or "um" and other things like that because i never know what else to say.

yeah, its pathetic.


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## ValiantThor (Dec 6, 2010)

Not sure if this fits the thread, ( my name is adam) and during math class i would zone out 100% of the time, and sometimes my teacher would say something like blah blah blah and then add em up to get the blah blah blah........and all i heard was adam up, liuke she was telling me to get up and i would just get up outta my chair during class and i would just be like lol wut? and everyone just thought i was a dumb ***


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## ValiantThor (Dec 6, 2010)

This is the only thread were I have read each post this is funny


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

I remember in my sophmore year as an undergrad, a girl that lived across from me in the dorms was in the bathroom doing a bunch of dishes.

And I said, "for a small person, you sure have a lot of dishes." Which made no sense at all and that got me a couple of awkward glances from bystanders.


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## puffins (Mar 9, 2011)

oh yeah another work related flub...(again me debt collecter, speaking with client) man: well i dont have any money because of medical bills me: well im very sorry to hear that but you still need to take care of your balance man: you dont understand, ive had both of my legs amputated and have no insurance me: oh my god, well at least youre okay now...(hm) man: IM NOT OKAY I DONT HAVE ANY ***** LEGS! me:..........so about your account balance man: *click*


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

Introduced myself to someone earlier today. It was the delivery. My name's a bit on the awkward side, doesn't make for the best first impression. That I'm self-conscious about it just makes it worse.


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## crimsoncora (Mar 29, 2011)

I love ur name ian^^^^


Lol we had guests come to my house and she said " hey how r u" where my dumbass replied with a burrrrpppp in her face

Lol it just escaped, we stared at each other a bit i awkwardly hugged her and walked away.




Omfg am dying at the posts of other users. Love it


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

crimsoncora said:


> I love ur name ian^^^^


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## mellamobrittney (Apr 5, 2011)

*I'm cracking up reading these.*

All of these are so funny, because I've been through every single one! haha. For instance, I was walking out of the grocery store one day as this girl that I used to work with a while back was walking in. We said our "Hellos" and had a quit chat of how much we hated that job back in the day. So as I'm getting ready to walk away she says "See ya" and I say "Thank you!". Wow...

Another example: I do runway modeling occasionally and on my very first "go-see"--It's kind of like an interview. You meet with the designer, he/she has you try on clothing, you do a quick walk, he/she decides if they want to use you in their show or not.--I walk into the boutique and the designer who I thought was female turned out to be a very attractive male (which sometimes I get flustered around cute guys and combined with the nervousness of this being my first go see...yeah it kind of through me for a loop). Anyways, he shook my hand and I said:

Me: "I'm Brittney, nice to meet you."
Cute designer dude: "I'm Blah Blah, it's nice to meet you too."
Me: "Nice to meet you too."
Cute designer dude: "..................."

Hahaha I could tell a thousand more of these, but the post is for the most "recent" ones, so I'll leave it at that. I'm so glad that I can laugh this stuff off now. It shows that I'm making progress.


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## mellamobrittney (Apr 5, 2011)

*I just thought of another one!*

I don't know if this was mentioned yet, but does anybody combine words together? Like say, you're thinking two things in your head at the same time but your mouth can't figure out which one it wants to say? LOL. I do this all the time. Example:

Person: "Hello"
Me and My SA + thinking of whether I should
say "Hello" like them or simply "Hi"= "Hi-Lo"
Person: "......."


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## mellie (Feb 3, 2008)

I had this professor point me out and say "you haven't spoken yet, we have to get you to say something," and I just mumbled something like "it's ok," and looked away hoping he would move on.. that made no sense.


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## Bathory (Dec 26, 2010)

mellamobrittney said:


> Hahaha I could tell a thousand more of these, but the post is for the most "recent" ones, so I'll leave it at that.


Oh psshhh, pretend you didn't see that part. Tell us your stories! :b

*I love this thread!*


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## Aly (Nov 30, 2010)

Someone accidently ran into me today and they said "sorry" so i said "sorry" back. 
I don't know if this was the normal thing to do or it was just my anxiety.. o-o


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## nonso (Jul 30, 2010)

In response to my professor asking me if I could do an assignment for him "Ok, yeah, sure, I think that would be...plausible." Wtf?


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## trendyfool (Apr 11, 2010)

MojoCrunch said:


> I remember in my sophmore year as an undergrad, a girl that lived across from me in the dorms was in the bathroom doing a bunch of dishes.
> 
> And I said, "for a small person, you sure have a lot of dishes." Which made no sense at all and that got me a couple of awkward glances from bystanders.


hahahahahhaahhahahahahahhahahahaha. oh man.


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## Anonn (May 5, 2006)

i am actually so socially awkward that in order to negate my awkwardness, i will purposely say outrageous/weird things to people. it's basically a social anxiety so powerful that it shuts off my inhibitions and makes me say funny things. 

just an example would be if i were in a grocery store late at night and a girl is obviously just wasting time before leaving work lining up cans of soup in an aisle, i will tell her that one of the cans isn't lined up properly and to please fix it. it usually gives them something to laugh at during their mundane side job.

this is actually one of the few positives of my social anxiety.


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## Mr Blues (Apr 1, 2011)

'Why are you sitting all by yourself?'

FFS I hate that one.

EDIT: Misread the title, as asking what others say to you. Nevermind..


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## lehcar18 (Feb 17, 2010)

Always having to deal with awkward posed when talking to people on the phone.


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## mellamobrittney (Apr 5, 2011)

nonso said:


> In response to my professor asking me if I could do an assignment for him "Ok, yeah, sure, I think that would be...plausible." Wtf?


Hahahaha that is hilarious!


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## nonso (Jul 30, 2010)

Yeah yeah, laugh it up :blank


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## SuperSky (Feb 16, 2011)

Turns out regular people say dumb stuff like this too. I overheard a convo this morning where two people were discussing this sort of thing. At the main cinema chain here, the people selling/checking the tickets have to say "Enjoy your movie." BOTH of the people in the conversation admitted that they've said "You too" back.

I think the only awkward thing I've said recently was:
"Your [solution] is wrong... It should've done this..."
"Ok cool."


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

Floor Guy: So, what kind of door are you looking to get?
Me: A wooden one.
Floor Guy: ಠ_ಠ

I didn't mean to sound like that, it was just the first thing I could think of to say. :um


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

I remember once I was at a bar/industrial club and I had one friend there. Even when I went to places like that I was still very awkward and wanted to run away. My one friend there was trying to introduce me to his roommates. I awkwardly shook his hand (people do NOT shake hands at places like that) and said hi...... and then walked away.

Does anyone here shake hands with people they meet that are their age. And it's totally....inappropriate?


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## puffins (Mar 9, 2011)

i always shake peoples hands, unless were at a club...so yeah....


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## Anonn (May 5, 2006)

MojoCrunch said:


> I remember once I was at a bar/industrial club and I had one friend there. Even when I went to places like that I was still very awkward and wanted to run away. My one friend there was trying to introduce me to his roommates. I awkwardly shook his hand (people do NOT shake hands at places like that) and said hi...... and then walked away.
> 
> Does anyone here shake hands with people they meet that are their age. And it's totally....inappropriate?


i shook my friend's mom's hand at a completely inappropriate time and she seemed surprised/confused. you're not alone!


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## fallingdownonmyface (Dec 3, 2006)

"you look very lethargic right now"


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## Gorillaz (Jul 13, 2010)

- where do you want to order the pizza from?
- uhh I have a phone in my basement, so we can order from here.
- I meant went which store...like pizza hut or dominoes or what...
- ...right. *facepalm*


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## ValiantThor (Dec 6, 2010)

This was horrible. So in january my dad sent me to town to get pizza we had ordered, and I forgot what place he had told me because theres so many of them so i picked the place i thought i remembered him saying. So i walk and and say i had an order for dale, but they said there wasnt one. The clerk suggested another store my dad may have called and he said do you know where that is? I for some reason said no even though i knew where it was, i said i wasnt from this area. I look over to the table to see people i know from school just looking at me like im retarded. It was horrible so i just left the store and yea....


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## Anonn (May 5, 2006)

ValiantThor said:


> This was horrible. So in january my dad sent me to town to get pizza we had ordered, and I forgot what place he had told me because theres so many of them so i picked the place i thought i remembered him saying. So i walk and and say i had an order for dale, but they said there wasnt one. The clerk suggested another store my dad may have called and he said do you know where that is? I for some reason said no even though i knew where it was, i said i wasnt from this area. I look over to the table to see people i know from school just looking at me like im retarded. It was horrible so i just left the store and yea....


haha, overthinking at its finest.


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## Iced (Feb 7, 2011)

Casher from work at work: Have good day off
Me: You too.


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

Oh God. I remember once in my Microbiology II class on our first lab. I had just met my new lab partner. We were doing a plating technique invented by some guy named Kirby Bauer (hence, the Kirby Bauer test).

Just as we started the lab. I asked her, "You're name is Kirby Bauer, right?" :doh


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

I was doing a mic test today to help the sound techies adjust the levels and such:

What I Meant to Say: Is this thing too quiet or loud?
What I Said: Is this thing too liet or quoud?

:bash


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## frillylove (Sep 11, 2010)

Today, while working on a science assignment, some guy asked me, "Hey, when you did this experiment, did you get this result?"

I hadn't finished the experiment yet, and I said "I don't know, I haven't... Yeah, sure," so he would leave as soon as possible. Awkward as ****. He chuckled before he walked away.


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## liilliiliilllil (Nov 3, 2009)

Mlkqernbahfgurotha.

I honestly mumble words plenty of times just so I'd say something and the other person wouldn't think I'm deaf. Now that other person thinks I'm dumb and incomprehensible.


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## TigerB (Apr 7, 2011)

When I greet someone and we both ask "how are you?" at the same time. Sometimes I wonder if I should wait for him/her to ask this or I should go first? ha.


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## puffins (Mar 9, 2011)

lol sprindrift....i love spoonerisms...i do it all the time.


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## katt993 (Apr 7, 2011)

some days at the cash register i get so tired i start repeating phrases to customers in a very insincere way n they get offended...hey once u start asking your 100th person how their day is going....its pretty hard


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## changeforthebetter (Feb 15, 2011)

so its school holidays, which means it is time for people to wish me a good holiday, which also means it is time for me to say 'you to' to anyone who does

Friend of my grandmas who is like 50 something, have a good break 
me, yea you too.. um

Friend of my mums on the phone at the end of the convo, have a good holiday
Me: yea you... (realised what i was saying).. cya.............'yea you cya' ??? agh


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

Should I keep my head still or move it?


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## imaginary (Apr 15, 2011)

Once in high school I was on a field trip and we stopped at Mcdonald's and while I was eating and in my own little world, one of the "cool" kids came up and asked me what I got, to which I replied chicken fajita and got red faced as he stared blankly at me, then a kid nudged me and informed me that he had meant my monopoly game pieces, then I was like "ohhhh, here you can have them" and gave them away even though I wanted them. Lame.


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## Belle Star (Jan 9, 2009)

I was nervous around my new neighbors and said, "I haven't come out yet" 

I meant I was being a hermit and hadn't come out of my new apartment. The girl I said it to just kind of snorted at me and laughed and said, Oh, oKay. I felt stupid and later found out it was National Coming Out Week for gay people. Now I think there is a faction of my neighbors who think I am gay and haven't come out yet. Hilarious. not.


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## JamieHasAnxiety (Feb 15, 2011)

Belle Star said:


> I was nervous around my new neighbors and said, "I haven't come out yet"
> 
> I meant I was being a hermit and hadn't come out of my new apartment. The girl I said it to just kind of snorted at me and laughed and said, Oh, oKay. I felt stupid and later found out it was National Coming Out Week for gay people. Now I think there is a faction of my neighbors who think I am gay and haven't come out yet. Hilarious. not.


LOOOOOL
Most epic thing I have ever read.. xP


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## IsThereAComputerOption (Apr 15, 2011)

A guy asked me where a building was that was 5 doors down from my house, I choked and told him to catch a bus into town. >.>


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## EKC1224 (Apr 11, 2011)

:rofl These posts are funny. I am sure it wasn't at the moment.. but it has turned into a lighter side now. I had many of those moments where I froze up and had to spit out any words for the sake of not being rude.


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## Carhair (Apr 15, 2011)

"Her: Your handwriting is like a doctor.
Me: Yea, i was going to be a doctor, but I... wasn't one."

I'm still not sure where I was going with that one. Awkward silence follows.


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## usernamegoeshere (Mar 27, 2011)

It's funny that we find all these funny but when we do it we obsess over it and regret it forever and ever.


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## EKC1224 (Apr 11, 2011)

usernamegoeshere said:


> It's funny that we find all these funny but when we do it we obsess over it and regret it forever and ever.


so very true - at least for me.


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## alte (Sep 4, 2010)

me: ...
her: ...
(awkward silence)


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## incali (Feb 5, 2010)

Mine involves being waaaayyy too open about my anxieties/insecurities with a good friend when we were both wasted. I regret it and I don't at the same time. I was honest but certain things made the situation awkward so now I have not heard from that (possibly former) good friend in a month....bummer....I need to stop drinking liquor...always gets me in trouble....

Have I learned my lesson this time? I hope so.


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## Anemone (Apr 12, 2011)

Ava said:


> when I try to say goodbye to someone and I end up repeating everything they say.
> 
> "see you later"
> "see you later"
> ...


 I do that too! Aaaah especially on the phone I hate it so much


----------



## puffins (Mar 9, 2011)

'your little girl looks nothing like her father, are you sure........um, omg im sorry' oh...my...god!


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## n00blar (Apr 15, 2011)

wow, i am laughing so hard reading all of these because i have done just about every single one myself.  So i have to share one so you guys can get a kick out of mine.

My name is Sawyer and i work at a gas station that makes us wear name tags. And something that happens just about every other day it seems is somebody will come in and say "Hey Sawyer, that's a cool name" or " I like your name". And even though it comes up so often i still have yet to find a response to it that works and doesn't seem awkward. Usually I'll just go with a long pause while trying to think of something and go"...um, Thanks..." 
I've also tried "Yea i like it too", "Yea it is pretty cool", or "Yea its not very common" and none of them ever seem to come off right and awkward silence ensues.


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## n00blar (Apr 15, 2011)

Cynae said:


> Or when people greet me with "*'Sup?*" and I don't know if I'm supposed to answer with "*Hi*" or "*Fine, you?*"


I used to have this problem too until i figured out that the best response is either "Yo" or repeating "Sup?" back to them. Repeating sup can backfire and be even more awkward so I stick with Yo and its worked out well for me thus far.


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## MrSoloDolo123 (Aug 2, 2010)

girl: "i like ur jacket "
me: "i like..... my jacket too..."


she was like uhh... then started talking to someone else


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## Oroboros (Apr 16, 2011)

First time meeting my girlfriend's mom (she was in the hospital on her bed)

Hey how ya doing Amy, I'm David.
Good Thanks.
.....
So how ya feeling Amy?
Good Thanks.
.....
So how you doing? I mean, better?
Yeah...
...................


then a few days later i asked my girlfriend what her mom thought of me and she mimicked in a funny way; "All he said was hi, hi, hi."


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## sparky10 (Dec 30, 2008)

n00blar said:


> wow, i am laughing so hard reading all of these because i have done just about every single one myself. So i have to share one so you guys can get a kick out of mine.
> 
> My name is Sawyer and i work at a gas station that makes us wear name tags. And something that happens just about every other day it seems is somebody will come in and say "Hey Sawyer, that's a cool name" or " I like your name". And even though it comes up so often i still have yet to find a response to it that works and doesn't seem awkward. Usually I'll just go with a long pause while trying to think of something and go"...um, Thanks..."
> I've also tried "Yea i like it too", "Yea it is pretty cool", or "Yea its not very common" and none of them ever seem to come off right and awkward silence ensues.


you could say yeah thanks ive had it all my life


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## usernamegoeshere (Mar 27, 2011)

I once asked my grandfather (who was in hospital with stomach cancer) how the food was..


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## EKC1224 (Apr 11, 2011)

usernamegoeshere said:


> I once asked my grandfather (who was in hospital with stomach cancer) how the food was..


:rofl :rofl


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## IsThereAComputerOption (Apr 15, 2011)

MrSoloDolo123 said:


> girl: "i like ur jacket "
> me: "i like..... my jacket too..."


That would make me want to talk to you more, because that's hilarious.


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## itsallanact (Dec 30, 2010)

I do these kind of things all of the time and I feel like such an idiot. I always feel like an Idiot. I think I will start responding "whatever" to anything and everything. At least I would be consistent and would get the same results.

"Good Morning" "whatever"


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

> I don't understand what's so great about blu-ray.


Now, given I was being truthful, it was being honest. But still it was awkward.


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## pickyone (Apr 5, 2011)

mimcofied said:


> This happens to me all the time..
> 
> They say "Hello" and then i say "good thanks"
> 
> ...


Omgsh yes! Or "I'm sorry" The other day I was asked to do overtime for my employer and it's totally optional. Well I have plans that day so I start with "I'm sorry but I can't blah blah blah " and then I continue through the conversation with the "I'm sorrys" Sorry for what? Sorry for having a life scheduled outside of work? Sorry for being an inconvenience to him? Sorry for myself cause that will be less money on MY paycheck? I def overdo sorry.


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## pickyone (Apr 5, 2011)

itsallanact said:


> I do these kind of things all of the time and I feel like such an idiot. I always feel like an Idiot. I think I will start responding "whatever" to anything and everything. At least I would be consistent and would get the same results.
> 
> "Good Morning" "whatever"


Can I use that?


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## Frenger868 (Apr 11, 2011)

This hasn't happened too much, but a few times, instead of saying good bye, I say, "Love you!" 
Its pretty damn embarrassing


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## Blacktea (Apr 13, 2011)

I wasn't anxious, but this is still a funny awkward moment. A couple of years ago, my mom and I were at my grandparents' apartment for Mother's Day. As we were leaving, one of us held the door for a guy who was coming in, and he goes, "Thank you, happy Mother's Day to you." And of course I automatically blurt, "You too" and realize two seconds later what I said. :teeth My mom was like, "Are you nuts?"

Also, one time I was talking to a classmate in college, with whom I was friendly, but we weren't friends exactly. She was about to leave and leaned in to kiss me, but it was so unexpected, I just stood there, frozen to the spot.:um Yikes, that was awful.

Yesterday I ran into a friend on campus and it looked like he was going to hug me, but I wasn't sure. So we ended up doing an awkward one-armed type of hug. lol

One time I was really anxious and I accidentally blurted out something personal about my friend's boyfriend in front of someone who didn't know him too well. He wasn't there, but my friend was, so I apologized to her later.

I was once on the bus and offered a woman my seat. She declined, and I asked, "Are you sure?" and she said, "Yes, I'm not old enough to sit down." I was mortified.:afrFrom then on, I always made sure the person _was _old enough before offering.:b

And this one I was really embarrassed about: I was sitting on the bus between an old man and an old woman, who were both Russian-speaking, like me. A pregnant woman got on and the old man gave her his seat. I should have gotten up and given him my seat, but I remained sitting. And then him and the old woman were talking in Russian about how I'm so stupid and have such bad manners.:um :um A little while later, an American old man with a cane got on, and the Russian woman gave him her seat. And he was like, "Thank you, you didn't have to do that. There are young people here, who should respect their elders..." I couldn't take it anymore, so I just got up and sprinted to the back of the bus. Simply awful.:afr :afr :afr


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

itsallanact said:


> I do these kind of things all of the time and I feel like such an idiot. I always feel like an Idiot. I think I will start responding "whatever" to anything and everything. At least I would be consistent and would get the same results.
> 
> "Good Morning" "whatever"


:lol

awesome


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## Aly (Nov 30, 2010)

ValiantThor said:


> Not sure if this fits the thread, ( my name is adam) and during math class i would zone out 100% of the time, and sometimes my teacher would say something like blah blah blah and then add em up to get the blah blah blah........and all i heard was adam up, liuke she was telling me to get up and i would just get up outta my chair during class and i would just be like lol wut? and everyone just thought i was a dumb ***


Hahaha xD 
that's hilarious.


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## saara (Jun 7, 2010)

I love this thread. I will definitely post here more often.:b

Hmmm...Yesterday a guy in a computer store was giving me advice on stuff, I was totally fine, then when I was leaving I got nervous.

He said: "Well, it was nice meeting you! Have a good evening."
Me: "Ohhh...Yeah...me to..lempppotoshi."

^I seriously mumble words that aren't in the English language.

(I don't want to go back in that store.)


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## tranquildream (Nov 17, 2010)

Yeah, I don't know why I collect sheep things, maybe because... they look like... clouds? /facepalm wtf


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## MrSoloDolo123 (Aug 2, 2010)

tranquildream said:


> Yeah, I don't know why I collect sheep things, maybe because... they look like... clouds? /facepalm wtf


lol sounds like something id say... like when you start a sentence having absolutely no idea where your going with it and just talking yourself into a dead end.


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## jiggy79 (May 12, 2007)

Man this thread cracks me up lol but I definitely feel everyone's pain as I've been there before. I have trouble at times over the phone when the conversation comes to an end and its time to say goodbye..I would say goodbye when my rhythm is off, I hope you guys can understand that, it's not a good feeling


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## Wacky Wednesdays (Apr 10, 2011)

Skylight said:


> ok, i will try to keep this nice & short..
> 
> *clerk*: "Hi, how can i help you?"
> *me*: "One lotto 649 ticket-- (cuts off)"
> ...


:teeth


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## serolf (Jan 10, 2008)

Girl: You're cute.
Me: Uh ok...
Girl: ...

*facepalm*


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## Omgblood (Jun 30, 2010)

ran into a classmate at the gym

she goes 'Dont I have class with you?'
I did like a stupid little wave and walked right by... 

I was in autopilot mode.. I didn't even really mean to wave.. Why the hell would I wave at someone that is talking to me... i feel like total dumbass

cant stop thinking about it, don't wanna go to class anymore.. dont ever want to go back to that gym again


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## Diacetylmorphine (Mar 9, 2011)

this happened about 4 years ago, but anyway lol.

Girl: You know you have pretty eyes
Me: *flabbergasted* *thinking wtf, lol*
_After what feels like an eternity._
Me: ......................... oh um, ok errrr... yeah thanks.

I was kinda lost for word's, didn't really know how to respond to that. :blank


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## msbxa (Mar 24, 2011)

_"__Hello"_


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## angray (Apr 18, 2011)

A classmate said "It's been snowing so I was sick so I couldn't come."

And I was "I know!"

He was like... huh?

I quickly say "...Yea people tend to get sick when it's really cold."

Him: ...aaah. Yea.


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## msbxa (Mar 24, 2011)

Ok from browsing through these a bit I remember one more specific. 

When I was in high school I was like 2nd or 3rd year and this new girl stopped me in the hall and introduced herself to me, she said I knew her brother and she told me her name and such. 
All I did was say "OK" and pointed at her, then I walked off. 
I never spoke to her again.


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## trendyfool (Apr 11, 2010)

Today. One hour ago. A random guy walks up to me and waves, and he's like, "Hi!" And I'm like, "um, hi..." and he goes "I was wondering if you might possibly be gay?" And I'm like, "yeah, I am..." and he's like, "you're really cute, can I have your number? I need a man." And I was just so surprised that I gave my number to him. facepalm. he wasn't cute at all...sigh. I'm definitely not texting him back.


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## Ironpain (Aug 8, 2010)

I can't think of any specific examples right now but I nearly teared up reading this it's amazing to know I am not alone in these kinds of moments. I know all too well the embarrassment and nervousness I feel when I go out, I have a problem with my tooth which makes me really scared to speak up so I speak with my mouth half closed and then somebody at the store always says What did you say can you say that again I can't hear you what? 

and I get so nervous that I yell out what I want cause I'm so embarrassed. It's also cause of my accent too I'm born here but I have a South African Accent and sometimes I say certain words and people here don't understand even though it's English my accent makes the words sound different. I always feel like there must be something wrong with me and keep running it through my head saying that it never happens to anyone else.

How come I'm the only person people have a hard time hear, I speak loud enough for me to hear and I do my best to project my voice but people always say what did you say I can't hear you once in a while I'm lucky and people hear me well enough but I feel embarrassed when I come across people at the store who give me that what are you saying look


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## Ironpain (Aug 8, 2010)

trendyfool said:


> Today. One hour ago. A random guy walks up to me and waves, and he's like, "Hi!" And I'm like, "um, hi..." and he goes "I was wondering if you might possibly be gay?" And I'm like, "yeah, I am..." and he's like, "you're really cute, can I have your number? I need a man." And I was just so surprised that I gave my number to him. facepalm. he wasn't cute at all...sigh. I'm definitely not texting him back.


Umm How old was this guy? sorry to ask and wow he actually asked if your gay, I'm not gay myself so I wouldn't know for sure but I'm sure I've never heard of a one person asking another gay person hey are you possibly gay I thought you just sensed that said person is gay and just like a straight person knows another straight person in a club or bar. He needs a man he makes it sound like he wants to buy you from the store I really need a man, $299 on a man $299 on a man get em while he's hot. No but seriously though yeah if your getting the creepy vibe from him then hey feel free to be careful.


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## Noll (Mar 29, 2011)

I accidentally called my math teacher (who is male) "mom".


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## Imp (Mar 26, 2011)

ObamaGoesPostal said:


> I accidentally called my math teacher (who is male) "mom".


Ouuch.. :S

Here's mine.

Girl ; [Insert real name here], do you have an eraser.
Me ; *looks at her for a while.* 'Ohsh-...yeah...'

Most awkward ten seconds of the day. Gah.


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## Tsunawada (Nov 12, 2010)

I was holding the door open for my classmates right before 5th Period and this person from my old drama program (long story) comes up. Trying to be nice, I managed to stutter "Good evening."

It was 11:50 in the morning.

I felt like a complete idiot. As if they need another reason to think I'm a moron....Man my SA has been getting worse lately.


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## saara (Jun 7, 2010)

I cut people off a lot. I have no idea how to interact social right now...Dunno why. It's getting worse.

In a yoga store:

Me: Hi!

Clerk: Hi, how are you?

Me: Do you have yoga lessons here?

Clerk:Yes-

Me: I'm fine. Thanks. Sorry. How are you?

Clerk: *laughs* Good. We have yoga on Sundays.

Me: How much are the classes?

Clerk: They're free.

Me: Oh cool. Ok I'm in a rush, gotta run.

Clerk: Alright, nice to meet-

_*I was halfway out the door*_

*facepalm/ again and again and again*


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## m3ow (Mar 9, 2011)

ObamaGoesPostal said:


> I accidentally called my math teacher (who is male) "mom".


That's hilarious! xD. Is he feminine? I can't think of the last weird/awkward thing I said, which is a good thing cause that means I'm not over-thinking things!


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## chefawkes (Apr 18, 2011)

i can't remember. i've already repressed it


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## Rudiger (Nov 27, 2010)

This thread is hilarious! I've read the whole thing, and I don't know if I've ever laughed so much in one sitting before


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## MrSoloDolo123 (Aug 2, 2010)

this one time at college i was getting my ID card from the admin office and when i got called up i completely forgot what to say.
the lady was like "how can i help u?"
me: "umm, how r u?"
lady: "im good thanks, how r u?"
me: "can i get my umm.... oh my ID card"
lady: "sorry? can u speak up?"
....

she probably thought i was on drugs.


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## Hot Chocolate (Sep 29, 2008)

stuttering...mispronunciation...stuttering and more mispronunciation..


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## shadow cougar (Apr 18, 2011)

I try to avoid thinking about such memories, especially when I mainly end up staying silent. What better way is there to avoid making a fool of yourself by simply saying nothing.......


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## Ununderstood (Jun 8, 2005)

Today I told an acquaintance in college PE class if she was gonna go in for spinning class for the last hour. Physical education class is 2 hours by the way. She was with her friend and she told me how I'd gotten a 92 on my Zoology exam and I was surprised. Then she asked me if I had talked to the professor to see what I needed to pass and I said (after an awkward 5 second delay, and facial expressions cause I didnt know what to say) "like twenty more of those". The interchange ended there and they left...? Must of been the way I said it...or what I said..? I felt awkward saying it...even more after I smiled and looked at the other girl and there was nothing but a weird look on her face.


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## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

I was walking up to the entrance of a building today and there was a guy coming out infront of me pushing a pram. I moved out of the way to let him past, but he mustn't have seen me because he did a quick turn back into the door and as he did, I sort of put my hand out to you know guide him away from backing into me completely.

Anyway my hand kind of accidentaly patted his *** and as soon as he looked around I went "helloo"

I didn't bother saying anything else, the damage had already been done..

:teeth


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## dullgirl82 (Apr 19, 2011)

I am horrible with words. And I do a lot of customer service at work so I humiliate myself quite a bit. My face turns bright red and I feel like an idiot after I respond with the wrong words. I do it with my family even when I'm not feeling any anxiety. They get a kick out of it...but its not embarrassing with them so I can laugh at myself.


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## Hello22 (Feb 10, 2010)

JimmyDeansRetartedCousin said:


> I was walking up to the entrance of a building today and there was a guy coming out infront of me pushing a pram. I moved out of the way to let him past, but he mustn't have seen me because he did a quick turn back into the door and as he did, I sort of put my hand out to you know guide him away from backing into me completely.
> 
> Anyway my hand kind of accidentaly patted his *** and as soon as he looked around I went "helloo"
> 
> ...


Haha that was quality!

I have often f**ked up in interviews whereby i say the wrong word and come out of it as red as a tomato. Can't think of anything right away though....


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## purplerainx3 (Apr 28, 2010)

Today at the mall-

Friend's older brother: "Do you want a salted pretzel too?"
Me: "Umm no, I just like, I'll actually pass it... *random muttering*"
Him: "..Uh.."
Me: *awkwardly walks around him to stand next to my friend*

I can't speak properly.

Then the pretzel guy who thought I was next in line: "Can I help you?"
Me: "Ha, uh no.. they're... *failed attempt at gesturing toward friend and her brother* *slowly walk away*"

It was just an awkward day overall.


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## InMyDreams55 (Apr 1, 2011)

*cute hostess see's my washington nationals hat*

Hostess: National's fan?

Me: Yea....i am.

Hostess: How are they doing this year?

Me: *pause* I don't know....i don't keep up with them.

:blank:|:roll:no


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## Molly1 (Apr 17, 2011)

I was at a restaurant and the waitress came up to give me and my family our food and she said, "You all enjoy your meal." And I said, "Thanks, you too." And then my family looked at me awkwardly.









Another time I was at school walking in the hallway and one of my friends passed me and asked, "Do you know where room 735 is?" And I wasn't paying attention and I thought it was a teacher so I said, "Oh yes ma'am." And then I turned around and found out it was my friend that asked and I said, "Oops I thought you were a teacher for a second." And then we just laughed it off.


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## Ununderstood (Jun 8, 2005)

This happened a while ago but w/e.

I used to go to a local drive-thru burger joint when I clocked out for lunch time. I used to always order the standard burger with no mayonnaise. One time however the lady didn't hear my order so I had to repeat myself so I said in a loud and clear voice so she could hear me, "CAN I HAVE TWO MAYOS WITH NO BURGERS". Guess I got a lil nervous .


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## Simon 870 (Apr 22, 2011)

I know I'm really nervous in front of someone because I say "How's it doing?", which is a combination of "How's it going?" and "How are you doing?".


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## Valace (Mar 27, 2011)

Not too recently, BUT IT'S PEE RELATED!

I was really sick at one point and had to bottle up some urine for a test...

After I filled it up and such, I came out and the nurse was a fair distance away and just looked at me like she was waiting for me to say something.

I had a small moment of "AHH WHAT DO I SAY?" and then simply nodded, played it cool, and said, "I made it nice and warm for ya."

Thinking on my feet about reporting pee temperature is my superpower.


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## Ununderstood (Jun 8, 2005)

Oh man, now that I remember. I was on crutches bout 6 weeks ago and I had to go to the post office to send an item I had sold on ebay. I had to take a bright blue tote bag hanging from my shoulder with the item inside of it since nobody was willing to help me.

As I was leaving, or swinging my way out of the post office, this nice older man on the line asked what had happened to me and I said I had an operation. He began to tell me how he had a similar thing happen to him but I got instantly nervous because everyone was listening to us that I just said "yeah.....hm........thank you" with a nervous smile. If I didn't have crutches I probably would of ran out of there.


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

To a young girl folding clothes: Excuse me could you grab me a changing room please?
Her: I don't even work here...

To a woman asking for my ID in the liquor store: Here it is
Woman: That's your health card

AHHHHHHHH D=


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

Valace said:


> Not too recently, BUT IT'S PEE RELATED!
> 
> I was really sick at one point and had to bottle up some urine for a test...
> 
> ...


OH my...:lol

That is funny though, I hope the nurse found it amusing.


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## Aly (Nov 30, 2010)

JimmyDeansRetartedCousin said:


> I was walking up to the entrance of a building today and there was a guy coming out infront of me pushing a pram. I moved out of the way to let him past, but he mustn't have seen me because he did a quick turn back into the door and as he did, I sort of put my hand out to you know guide him away from backing into me completely.
> 
> Anyway my hand kind of accidentaly patted his *** and as soon as he looked around I went "helloo"
> 
> ...


hahahaha xD that made my day.


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## NumeroUno (Oct 23, 2009)

Just today, was kinda awkward but I came into work and spoke to this lady for a few minutes, then about half a hour later I saw her and said ''good morning'' like wtf? I found it awkward anyway.


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## butimbroken (Apr 18, 2011)

When someone isn't talking to you but you think they are.

I always thank people, it runs out. Sorry and apologies do as well. And the "you too" comments.

I used to work for a call center, which used a generalized name on many jobs (was in market research) so when I would sometimes call someone I would revert into my work person, use the name and go into the questionare or something on autopilot. Gah!

An insane amount of old work ones could be used. On both sides. Like when you we would call someone, ask for such and such, they'd say they aren't here right now and ask for a message or whatever, then you tell them why you're calling.... and oh, they died. What the hell?

I say "it's okay" a lot and no one every knows what I mean. Sometimes I don't either haha.

Getting off the phone/goodbyes are awkward. I either say something nutso or start repeating everything they say then everything goes silent and odd until they hang up/leave.

Calling someone "sir" or "ma'am" when they are clearly the opposite.

Implied sexual things that I don't get at the time so think mean something else and then later get it and go "Ohhh..."


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## shankly (Feb 2, 2011)

At my job, I never know what to say whenever customers ask "How are you?" We've never met so why do you care? Or is it a rhetorical question- kind of how "what's up" can also mean "hi." It happens all the time, and I feel fake because 9 times out of 10 I reply with the same polite smile/"finethanksyou?". 

/Larry David moment


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## ValiantThor (Dec 6, 2010)

shadow cougar said:


> I try to avoid thinking about such memories, especially when I mainly end up staying silent. What better way is there to avoid making a fool of yourself by simply saying nothing.......


you will feel better if you just laugh about it


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## zombiedaisy (Apr 22, 2011)

shankly said:


> At my job, I never know what to say whenever customers ask "How are you?" We've never met so why do you care? Or is it a rhetorical question- kind of how "what's up" can also mean "hi." It happens all the time, and I feel fake because 9 times out of 10 I reply with the same polite smile/"finethanksyou?".
> 
> /Larry David moment


When I walk into a store and a sales person says "hi, how are you" ive trained myself to quickly say "fine, and how r u today". Not always, but 8 out of 10 times i will. However, the conversation stops there for me. lol


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## tiffany88 (Mar 21, 2011)

"Goes to show you, people with brain damage are the real heroes at the end of the day."


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## shankly (Feb 2, 2011)

zombiedaisy said:


> When I walk into a store and a sales person says "hi, how are you" ive trained myself to quickly say "fine, and how r u today". Not always, but 8 out of 10 times i will. However, the conversation stops there for me. lol


Good to know that customers can feel just as confused. I get that it's all in the name of friendliness, but it's so...forced.


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## Jimminy_Billy_Bob (Nov 26, 2008)

not really the same thing but dont u hate it when someone waves in your direction and you wave back only to realise it was to someone behind you? embarrassment ensues..


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## forevercandyapples (Apr 25, 2011)

I can relate to all of you.. I really can. There are places and people who my SA seems most powerful at/with. I'm sure people know about my anxieties even though I've never spoken to them about it!

My brother's partner had a baby before Christmas and so did I. When it's just me and his partner in the room, I always get awkward and starting "umming". But this time, I was holding their baby and I said "wow, he's got darker skin than I thought." ?? wtf. His parents are both white? And my brother's partner went "What do you mean". I don't know what I was trying to get at. But I had a baby also before christmas and my baby is multicultural but looks very caucasian. I think I was comparing my baby to theirs. Oh god.. this makes no sense. 

Other times, I always seem to say sentences with "and stuff" at the end of it. Like, I'll say "You know what I mean and stuff", "I'd like to go to the coffee shop and have a drink there and stuff", "Shall we meet outside the library and stuff?". 

There's soo many times where I mess up!!


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## SuperSky (Feb 16, 2011)

forevercandyapples said:


> Other times, I always seem to say sentences with "and stuff" at the end of it. Like, I'll say "You know what I mean and stuff", "I'd like to go to the coffee shop and have a drink there and stuff", "Shall we meet outside the library and stuff?".


 Lol, I end a lot of sentences with "or something," although it usually makes a bit of sense to the sentence. But I sort of slur it to be "or summin'"... "Yeah, the answer I got was like point four or summin...", "I think he went to get lunch or summin." Guess it covers all the bases, lol.


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## RFD1337 (Apr 23, 2011)

I saw a cute girl mowing the lawn yesterday.She said "Good Morning",and I said "Thank You".........


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## domi8888 (Mar 23, 2011)

To a girl: "You look like my classmate!" (And all my classmates are boys) T.T


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## zombiedaisy (Apr 22, 2011)

Oh geez. I have a bad habit of saying "you know" at the end of a sentence when im really nervous... Or "um" and "like" A LOT!!! 

If Im really nervous and im stuck in a situation where I have to talk to someone, I wont talk unless they talk to me, and then when they do ask something, I answer as quickly as possible and leave it at that. Today I got my hair colored at the salon. It took two hours, so i had to spend two hours with my hair stylist. OMG, it was awkward. Not only for me, but she could sense my anxiety so it was awkward for her too. LOL


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## forevercandyapples (Apr 25, 2011)

P.s- Does anybody else over-compliement people to try and make conversation!? I find myself complimenting everybody even if I don't mean it. And I won't just stick with ONE compliment, I'll usually compliment their outfit, then 5 minutes later their hairstyle, then how kind they are lol.. I think some people just think I'm being fake and laughing behind their backs


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## Aly (Nov 30, 2010)

well, here's what happened on easter right when i was leaving my grandma's house..
My grandma: "Have a good end of the year at school"
Me: "You too"
:doh


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## Bbenson (Jan 29, 2011)

I went on a date a week ago. First time in a WHILE and I think everything I said seemed awkward. It was rough haha but.. at least I gave it a shot


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## Aphexfan (Jan 12, 2011)

When I was buying lunch at the school cafe, the person who rang me up said hello to me...I just stood there and nodded, paid for my lunch without saying anything to her....I really hate being so awkward around people


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## gr15 (Apr 29, 2011)

I'm attracted to this dude and I get so nervous around him that words out of my mouth have no meaning whatsoever to the (lack of) conversation and just gets extremely awkward. Having a panic attack while in this situation really doesn't make it any better either. :sus


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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

Aphexfan said:


> When I was buying lunch at the school cafe, the person who rang me up said hello to me...I just stood there and nodded, paid for my lunch without saying anything to her....I really hate being so awkward around people


Aww sweetie!  It's okay! :squeeze :kiss I do that sometimes too... I can be really awkward when I'm paying for stuff, like at the grocery store or at Target or something... I just never know what to do while I wait for them to ring me up... so I just stand there awkwardly not knowing what to say... :hide


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## saara (Jun 7, 2010)

Went to a fancy art show. (Fancy places and people make me even more nervous.)

The guy who took my ticket greeted me with 'Good Evening!'

I replied- 'Yeah.'

:no

But I don't blame myself entirely on this one. I have never had anyone say good evening to me in my life...:um


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## Trek (Apr 12, 2010)

'I can take some price... off of the... price...' I was selling a bike to someone and I couldn't get my words out right. She was pretty cute too.  To bad I sounded like a complete moron.


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## modus (Apr 27, 2011)

During campus guard duty rounds in the dorm halls:

Me: "Man, there's so many foreign students here! Look at some of these names. Like this guy... Ra."

Her: "That's the RA... RA Dan."

We busted a gut laughing actually. Sometimes SA can create funny moments


----------



## ValiantThor (Dec 6, 2010)

just now at my family store a lady said wow your taller then your mom ha.....how tall are you? I thought she said how old am i.....I said im twenty. She looked at me and just repeated twenty?...and then the store went silent and i made fast exit out the room.


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## Lasair (Jan 25, 2010)

Guy : Would you like to go to oxygen ( concert ) with me
me: I'll have to ask my mam :doh


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

This thread always makes my day :lol


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## Condottieri (May 7, 2011)

Riding on my bike and tried to wave at someone but kind of sort of lost control so I did like a half wave. I think she pretended not to see me.


----------



## PeakOfTheMountain (Oct 3, 2010)

guy-"how was your day so far?"
me-"nothing"


----------



## sanspants08 (Oct 21, 2008)

Girl: "How are you today?"
Me: "Like a 6-piece McNugget please."


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

The dude: "What are you trying to find?"
Me: "agoijrfwah" and points to the traffic jam in front of me

I wasn't trying to find anything, just waiting for people to move. This guy pops out at me all the time though and I usually respond much like this. "sigh"


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## boosh (Sep 4, 2009)

phone rang at home and it was my brother's girlfriend, can't remember much of the conversation but she said at one point, "I guess i'll see you soon then" and I replied "yeah alright" and then she jokingly mocked the way i said it without any enthusiasm, couldn't think of what to say and there was a 4 second awkward silence. was paranoid for ages i sounded rude and that she'll think i don't like her :no


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## Sara930 (May 26, 2011)

I work at a restaurant so I have to pretend to be happy and friendly all the time. When people ask me how I am I always something like "I'm great. How are you? ( usually without breaking my gait because I am pretending to be busy so that I don't have to engage in an actual conversation). Anyhow, when my grandmother died a few years a ago this woman I worked with showed up at the funeral. As I was smoking and sobbing outside by myself she came up and hugged me and asked how I was doing so, of course, I said "I'm great, how are you?" I was so scared that she thought I was am idiot, or worse, that I was being sarcastic when she was just trying to be nice. Ugh.


----------



## Christina123 (May 26, 2011)

Told I guy I liked he looks good with the beard he's grown. He didn't even say a word. So awkward.


----------



## 11223 (May 27, 2011)

I returned a rental car and the guy asked how it was to drive, and I said, "It was fine, very fine, very very very very fine," like I couldn't stop saying "very."


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## alte (Sep 4, 2010)

I go to turn in a form at the apt office (I just moved in about a week ago). There is a crowd of people in the office.

Me: Hi, I have this form ....
Them: Oh thank you. We lived in this apt. a while back.
Me: Did you really? It is a nice apt. I like it.
Them: You better keep it in good shape or else we'll cry (said jokingly)
Me: Yeah, I will (an amazingly dull response). 
...
Me: ok thank you.


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## notna (Aug 24, 2010)

Brilliant thread xD


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## BatmanDK (Jan 7, 2009)

I panicked whilst chatting to a girl in a club and unprovoked, told her 
"You don't look a day over 45!"

She got a little upset as she was only 36.....
I'll get my coat!


----------



## imogen (Jun 7, 2011)

the gas man came in to read the gas meter, i said it was under the stairs, then i said "i cant get out." i meant i couldnt get down the stairs because of the dog gate, but he looked at me weird to i ran away.


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## sdmk (Aug 7, 2009)

PeakOfTheMountain said:


> guy-"how was your day so far?"
> me-"nothing"


I laughed.


----------



## artandis (Jun 5, 2011)

I walked into a blind guy full on and said "whoops I didn't see you there, I'm totally blind today"

Then I realized what I said and basically ran away. Everyone who heard just stared at me but I think he found it hilarious. :um


----------



## Lionking92 (Apr 6, 2011)

at my graduation last year i saw my ex's mom and she's like: congratulations on your graduation, you look beautiful !
my response: oh thank you and congrats too !

she looked at me with the weirdest look :s


----------



## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

Walking with a friend down the street and a lady looks at my beige jeans, then says something as she walks by. All I knew was that she said something about my jeans, so I said thanks just to be polite. Then my friend tells me she said "Looks like somebody forgot to use a napkin" because I had a splotch on one leg. Thanks, b*tch!


----------



## kippan (Jun 4, 2011)

At the library at my uni you need to ask the librarian to release the documents you need to print from her computer and tell her which number computer you're on:
"Hello."
"Hi, how can I help you?"
"Well...um...I'm here to release my com-computer...my twenty...my museum twenty...my document from twenty?"
"Oh you mean writing assignment number two?"
"Yeah...Ok bye."


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

*Girl sneezes*
Me: Thank you



(I'm a cashier and usually tell the customers their change as I hand it back.)
I hand back someone's receipt only, because she gave exact change. I say "$6.45. Have a nice day." That amount was her TOTAL. 



The professor passes out paper for an in-class essay. I'm the first in the row. I hand all the paper to the person behind me.
Student behind me (apprehensively): Don't you want any paper for yourself?
Me: Um yeah....sorry. *Takes a couple sheets*


The scene: At Panera Bread on a date. The clerk says my name, and I go up to get my food. There are two plates: one with chips only, and one with a sandwich and chips. I can't figure out which is mine, so I stand there awkwardly. I look back at my date, who simply stares back. Finally I realize the plate that's FULL is mine, and take it.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

I got a green tea from starbucks... I say to the girl "Thanks you".... then I look down and walk out, feeling like an idiot.


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## littlepickles (Apr 29, 2011)

Lol I can't recall any of these types of moments but I hate when you run out of something to say, like:

Me: Hello
Them: Hi how are you??
Me: I'm gooood, how are you?
Them: Pretty good myself.

I never know how to respond to that :-/. I usually say something like "That's awesome." and then they think I'm being rude or something ahaha.


----------



## citizen_erased (Dec 18, 2007)

This thread is great lol!

At work, when i see one of my colleagues for the first time that day i always try and say "Good morning" to them just to be polite, but sometimes when i see them i'll forget that i already said "Good morning" to them earlier and say it to them again - cue awkward/confused/weird look from the other person. :blank:um:doh


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## cloud dancing (Jun 17, 2011)

Wow...and I thought I was the only one!

My most common one is:
Me: Hi how are you?
Them: Fine, and you?
Me: Great, how are you?


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## SHYGIRLUV (Jun 17, 2011)

I was on the bus and a guy was trying to talk to me. He told me i was very good looking and what was my name and i got so emberressed and paniced i said "thnks" he looked at me and waited for a reply to the name part i just noded my head n turned to look out the window


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## Perkins (Dec 14, 2010)

The other day:

Movie usher: Enjoy the movie.

Me: You, too!

Major fail.


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## cloud dancing (Jun 17, 2011)

I once asked a girl I hadnt seen since high school when her baby was due. I was mortified when she told me she was not pregnant. I felt terrible. I quickly recovered and said, "oh but I heard you were!"

THAT is a double major Fail! Because not only did I put my foot in my mouth, but then I lied too. 
I never ever ask when a baby is due now to this day...If someone is going to put their foot in their mouth, it will be me....


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## EmptyRoom (Jul 28, 2010)

A few days ago I went to take a placement test at a community college and afterwards checked to see if I was approved for financial aid. Since the sound of my voice is the volume of a mouse I had to repeat my name several times and my sentences carried off into unfinished mumbles.


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## dontworrybehappy (Dec 4, 2010)

This thread made my night. 
I can't think of anything specific right now, but I've done the "you too" thing many times.


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## Rodeo3point2 (Jun 18, 2011)

This is a great thread, to think I was the only one who consistenly says "How are you doing?" to people who ask me the same question first.

Does anyone else ever slur their words so badly that they talk in a different accent? I'm from South Carolina but people seem to have a habit of asking me if I'm from Germany.


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## merrick (Jun 12, 2011)

cloud dancing said:


> Wow...and I thought I was the only one!
> 
> My most common one is:
> Me: Hi how are you?
> ...


hahah yep


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## papaSmurf (Jun 16, 2008)

Perkins said:


> Movie usher: Enjoy the movie.
> 
> Me: You, too!


^Yep, I do this all the time!


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## Taz (Jun 18, 2011)

haha i'm familiar with the "you too" saying also.

My favorite response it also "Okay"

It's funny how you try not to say something retarded but you do anyway.


----------



## Taz (Jun 18, 2011)

papaSmurf said:


> ^Yep, I do this all the time!


I hate that too, lol. At first the response feels normal to me but then I facepalm a few seconds later.


----------



## MPS (Oct 27, 2005)

Date: Yesterday
Location: Work

Colleague: 'See you next week!'

MPS: 'Yeah, see you next week*end*!'

Colleague:'........'


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## tutliputli (Feb 22, 2009)

Cash machine dispenses money

Me: thanks very much!


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## Jemma (Jun 10, 2011)

a couple of hours ago&#8230;

Acquaintance - Would you like a drink?
Me (thirsty) - Yes please, that would be great
Acquaintance - Would you like a glass of wine?
Me - Oh, no thank you
Acquaintance - Water or juice then&#8230; or what would you like?
Me - Oh, no thank you, I'm fine.
Acquaintance - ... ok ...
Arghh&#8230;


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## UniversalPolymath (Jun 3, 2011)

Woman (interviewing me for a job at Blockbuster): So why do you want to work here?

Me: Well ...uh, to be honest, I don't _really _want to work here ...

*woman looks at me with bewilderment; awkward silence ensues*

The worst part being, of course, that I really, really _did_ want to work there. To this day, I don't know where the hell that one came from.


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## Shooterrr (Jul 19, 2009)

There's this guy in one of my summer classes. We spoke briefly one time before like 2 weeks ago. So today when I saw him in the hall before class I said "hi" and he kinda just looked at me like he'd never seen me before. LOL whatever.


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## kilgoretrout (Jul 20, 2011)

cloud dancing said:


> My most common one is:
> Me: Hi how are you?
> Them: Fine, and you?
> Me: Great, how are you?


lol. Done this before...


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## Owl Eyes (May 23, 2011)

This was really embarrassing... at least it was with my good friend. Anyways, I was really out of it and we were dropping my friend off home, she said "bye [my name]" and I replied back "bye [my name]" lol it was so awkward.


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## heyJude (Aug 1, 2009)

I work at a grocery store and one day I was putting up carts and this man tells me, "I'll take that cart"...and I say ..."Thanks." 

whywhywhy...did I thank him??! He didn't do anything...:um

My first day on the job, supervisor-head-of-the-store-person asks me "So, how do you like your job?" Me: "It's...interesting."

whywhywhy did I say that to her?! *facepalm*


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## Tu Cielo (Jun 5, 2011)

I usually say dumb things like "Thank you" when I should say "You're welcome" and vice-versa. Or when someone says "What's up?" I'll say "Good" haha. I'm always saying awkward things. I remember I went to this bonfire and everyone there played this little get-to-know-you game where everyone had to go around the circle introducing themselves and saying one thing they liked that began with the first letter in their name. When it was my turn, I of course had no idea what to say and was just like "I don't know what I like" and my boyfriend was like "you like ***" (my name begins with A) jokingly and I blurted out really loudly "I know what I don't like, I don't like ***!" and everyone was kinda silent for a couple seconds and then just resumed the game. I was so embarrassed that I said something so stupid, it just ruined the rest of my night =[ I kept thinking of all the things I COULD have said, but didn't.


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## wheelbarrow (Jul 18, 2011)

Went out and ordered some take out today. Told the white girl, "BYE" and "YOU HAVE A NICE DAY NOW" in a recklessly loud and aggressive manner. She felt intimidated and I felt sad. Next time I'll have to use my fruity gay guy voice so there is no hint of intimidating masculinity there.


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## wheelbarrow (Jul 18, 2011)

Shooterrr said:


> There's this guy in one of my summer classes. We spoke briefly one time before like 2 weeks ago. So today when I saw him in the hall before class I said "hi" and he kinda just looked at me like he'd never seen me before. LOL whatever.


If you're decently attractive, he was probably freaked out and froze. Guys your age usually receive dysfunctional messaging about how to run a relationship and feel intimated by skinny girls, even quiet/shy ones. Lots of guys who are the alpha of their wolf pack, have no idea how to be the alpha of their relationships.


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## jimity (Jan 12, 2011)

I paid for an item and said "thanks" but decided I sounded nervous so I added a "you" after it to try to cover it up so I ended up saying "thanks you".


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## MrZi (Mar 31, 2011)

haha! some of these really made me laugh - and i'm only on the 2nd page!


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## softshock11 (Jan 9, 2011)

is that food i smell?

*about my sisters feet*


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## AgBjBeAF (Jul 8, 2011)

OK, these are hilarious, so I'll share one as well.

Me: Happy Birthday!
Them: Thank you so much!
Me: You're welcome.

...so embarrassing.


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## productofthestate (Jul 27, 2011)

*Thanks for your story*

"I decide to risk it after sitting in my car for 20 mins. I go knock on the door. One girl answers and immediately I can tell by the tone of her voice that she thought this was a really awkward moment and said "ohhhh, heyyyyy, yeahhhh so what's up haha". Few mins later she pops the question "u never told us you were coming". I said "yes I did, check your phone". They saw it and just said "oh". So until midnight when the clock struck 2009 I did my best to hang out w/ a couple girls that I barely knew from college and I'm sure they thought it was weird for me to drive an hr to see them. One of them then asked "do you have other friends you can see tonight? Are we the only ones?" And I just make up some nonsense."

Thank you so much for that story. It made me so angry to see how they treated you. That girl asking, "do you have other friends you can see tonight? Are we the only ones?" that kind of person should be absolutely ashamed of herself. I have an idea that maybe people with SA are just more polite and considerate of other people. My dad was in the military so I moved a lot when I was a kid. Being the new kid made it hard to make friends. When I was 12, it was my first year living in a new place. I had one friend, my best friend. When my brother (he was in his 20s) came to visit he said "You don't have any friends, do you?" I was so devastated when he said that. Now that I look back on it, things are much worse for me now. Now, I really don't have any friends. I only hang out with my cousin and boyfriend. And I'm not a kid anymore so there's no excuse. My cousin said to me before "Well it makes sense you don't have a cell phone, you don't have any friends...no offense." For people to say things like that even when your situation isn't so bleak, like when I was 12, really make things so much worse. It becomes so embarassing not to have friends.

I can also see what you're saying about how we're risking people finding out about us having no friends when we interact with new people. My other cousin is like me, he has no friends. I see how every one talks about him, that he's a loner, etc. I can't stand the idea that they're probably talking about me the same way.


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## lil lynn (Sep 4, 2009)

A lot of times I just can't settle on what I want to say and so I just blurt out a jumble of words so there's not just awkward silence. I pretty much just throw together a few beginnings of sentences and pretend it's a phrase or something. Today someone told me they were going to get some food and I literally said "ohhowhathat'suh". The one thing that saves me is that I mumble a lot so people usually think that I said a real sentence and they just couldn't understand it. So they'll ask me to repeat what I said which gives me some extra time to form a comprehensible sentence. It's pretty awkward though and afterwards I'm always like "what the hell just came out of my mouth?"


----------



## A Little More Stupid (Jul 14, 2011)

I was at a party a few days ago, and I was attempting to make conversation with a random person. I asked "Do you go to (local high school name)?" He goes "No, I go to (local university name)." I was confused because I didn't realize he was in college and I thought he was saying the name of his high school, so I said "Oh I've never heard of that school." He just looked at me like I'm crazy because it's a really big university, but then about 2 minutes later I realized my mistake, and I yelled "OHHHH YOU'RE IN COLLEGE!" really loudly. Ugh.


----------



## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

"Yes I'd like me receipt." Had many awkward moments where instead of "my" I'd say "me" and sound Scottish or something.


----------



## marinas658 (Jul 27, 2011)

Sometimes someone cracks a joke, or starts horsing around and I don't exactly know how to respond. I freeze up and don't say anything and than it gets kinda awkward :\


----------



## sanspants08 (Oct 21, 2008)

MojoCrunch said:


> "Yes I'd like me receipt." Had many awkward moments where instead of "my" I'd say "me" and sound Scottish or something.


If this happens again, you could always say, "YARR!" afterward, and pretend you're a pirate :yes.

I say awkward things all day long...A client just asked, "Do you speak Spanish?" and I said, "No thank you." :roll Then, "But thanks." :um


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## Pr0n (May 20, 2010)

I was at the wedding a few weeks ago. Needless to say, a dreaded day for someone with SA.

After the ceremony in church everyone was congratulating to newlyweds, and at the exit to their parents. I shook the hands with groom's dad and he said "thank you". I nodded and my stupid auto pilot brain repeated his "thank you".


----------



## Fluffy (Apr 9, 2011)

Owl Eyes said:


> This was really embarrassing... at least it was with my good friend. Anyways, I was really out of it and we were dropping my friend off home, she said "bye [my name]" and I replied back "bye [my name]" lol it was so awkward.


Lol :lol that happened to me before..
There was also this awkward conversation at school. Some people and I were sitting outside for lunch and it was winter: 
Girl: "Man, it's cold!" 
Me: "Where?"


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## Pr0n (May 20, 2010)

Oh and when someone starts waving and talking to a person behind you, and you respond to him. Damn i hate this. Awkward as hell. And sometimes i even know he/she isn't talking to me, i just immediately react because i'm always tense, lol.

And i'm just reading this thread and laughing. It's funny how many posters here had "thank you" phases XD. I can totally relate to a lot of posts.


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## thisgirl (Nov 12, 2010)

My first day at college, I was required to go to some kind of orientation for freshmen. So I'm standing there surrounded by people and we were in line waiting for something, I forgot what it was. Anyways, a girl walks up to me and introduces herself. I think she did it because I was a serious tomboy at the time, and she clearly was too. I think that was her way of making a new friend who had something in common. So she shakes my hand and says, "Hi, my name is [insert her name, I forgot it]." And she was obviously waiting for me to tell her my name. But instead I just nodded, and repeated her name as a question, and didn't say anything else. She just kinda looked at me awkwardly and just turned back around. I felt bad because I think it seemed like I didn't want to talk to her. But I really did, I just didn't know the "rules" of conversation. That bothered me for a long time.

Years ago, at work I had a huge crush on one of my co-workers. So one day my mom came to my job to buy something, and for some reason I introduced her to the guy I liked. A few days later, his mom comes in to buy something and he introduced me to her. It went something like:

Him [to me]: "This is my mom."
His mom: "Hi!"
Me: "Hi, nice to meet you."
His mom: "Nice to meet you too."
Me: ...
*absolute awkwardness*
Me: "Hiiiii" *slowly walks away*

WTFF?? Why did I say hi again???? This bothered me for a LONG time. This all happened right in front of the boy I liked, and I was sure he thought I was a complete weirdo now. On top of that, I could tell his mom was wondering why he was introducing us in the first place. The fact that he didn't tell her who I was, and then went dead silent, didn't help things either.

But I've since learned the "rules" of conversation. And have trained myself to have a response to random situations like this. I am no longer this awkward when meeting people, because I just use the typical small talk questions and they usually work.


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## TigerB (Apr 7, 2011)

thisgirl said:


> My first day at college, I was required to go to some kind of orientation for freshmen. So I'm standing there surrounded by people and we were in line waiting for something, I forgot what it was. Anyways, a girl walks up to me and introduces herself. I think she did it because I was a serious tomboy at the time, and she clearly was too. I think that was her way of making a new friend who had something in common. So she shakes my hand and says, "Hi, my name is [insert her name, I forgot it]." And she was obviously waiting for me to tell her my name. But instead I just nodded, and repeated her name as a question, and didn't say anything else. She just kinda looked at me awkwardly and just turned back around. I felt bad because I think it seemed like I didn't want to talk to her. But I really did, I just didn't know the "rules" of conversation. That bothered me for a long time.
> 
> Years ago, at work I had a huge crush on one of my co-workers. So one day my mom came to my job to buy something, and for some reason I introduced her to the guy I liked. A few days later, his mom comes in to buy something and he introduced me to her. It went something like:
> 
> ...


you mind sharing those small talk tips?


----------



## HackBauer (Aug 15, 2011)

I told someone i'd "Throw up an application" when they offered me a job. Totally spazzed out! lol


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

HackBauer said:


> I told someone i'd "Throw up an application" when they offered me a job. Totally spazzed out! lol


:b

And what a turn of events THAT would've been.


----------



## jenema (Aug 8, 2011)

I was at a horse show and there was this guy there that i have a crush on. After winning one of my classes he comes up to me and says "you know, blue is my favorite color" without thinking, i said "well, its mine now too." I meant it as a blue = 1st place thing but it came out as just an embarassing creepy stalker thing.


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

thisgirl said:


> Him [to me]: "This is my mom."
> His mom: "Hi!"
> Me: "Hi, nice to meet you."
> His mom: "Nice to meet you too."
> ...


Seriously sounds like something I would say. After the initial exchanges are made, it's all, "so...?"


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

I was picking up takeout for dinner. The girl behind the counter was so pretty, and it was already ridiculously loud in there... I was so anxious and nervous and couldn't hear her very well on top of it. 

I think she said, "Okay, it's $9.50" 
I have no idea what I was thinking, but I guess I "heard" her say "I've got $9.50." 

So, what was my genius response?

"Oh, no, it's okay. I'm paying." 

WTF. v_v


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## thisgirl (Nov 12, 2010)

tigerblood said:


> you mind sharing those small talk tips?


Sure. Well, one thing you have to try to do is, really listen to what the person is saying and think about what they expect in return. For example, when the girl introduced herself to me, at the time I didn't know that in return I had to tell her my name and say nice to meet you. That was something that took me a while to realize. And in the second story, after I said "Nice to meet you" to my co-worker's mom, there was no need to stand there any further. I should've very politely said "I gotta get back to work, but enjoy the rest of your day," and walked away. She most likely would've just said, "Same to you."

If a cashier greets you, "Hi, how are you?" they expect you to say, "I'm fine, thanks," or "I'm fine, and yourself?" Try to remember these automatic responses. Just smile and say them politely so you won't seem like you're not in the mood to talk (unless you're really not). Also keep in mind that sometimes people don't expect you to have a whole conversation, they just expect empty small talk, like the examples above. In both of my embarrassing situations, no one was expecting full conversations from me. I made it awkward by _thinking_ they were, and being nervous because I didn't have anything to say. Sometimes small talk leads to other longer conversations, but 90% of the time people expect these simple responses from you and nothing more.


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## changeforthebetter (Feb 15, 2011)

phoelomek said:


> I was picking up takeout for dinner. The girl behind the counter was so pretty, and it was already ridiculously loud in there... I was so anxious and nervous and couldn't hear her very well on top of it.
> 
> I think she said, "Okay, it's $9.50"
> I have no idea what I was thinking, but I guess I "heard" her say "I've got $9.50."
> ...


lol, that is really funny


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

^ 
Sure, it is now, but I felt like crawling into a hole at the time. :b


----------



## Syndacus (Aug 9, 2011)

Was a Whataburger..and got my food and stuff, and lady asked me, "You want some condiments?" And I busted out laughing thinking she said, "Condom Mints"...and I was like WTF...


----------



## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Back like a week ago I was playing with my cousins 3 year old son and this one lady said ohh he really likes you and I said yes he does. Ugh! I sounded like pedophile. The way I said it it did.


----------



## CoreyX (May 19, 2011)

In a store like a year ago
Cashier "Do you want a bag for th..."
Me "-interrupts- I wanna buy these"
Cashier ".......Do you wanna bag for these?"
Me "Uhhhh no"


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## TimeToBegin (Jul 7, 2011)

I cringe just thinking about this.

Last semester in Psychology class, it was a big class with 60 students, the professor made us introduce ourselves one by one on the first day. We were supposed to say our name and what we were majoring in. When it was my turn, I was so nervous that I mumbled the stupidest thing, I said "*insert my name here* is undecided".
I spoke in freakin third person. I hope no one remembers that.


----------



## barczyl (May 10, 2011)

I just called to make an eye appointment. I said "I'm calling to make an appointment for barczyl". She then asked to talk to him (being myself) and I said "Uh...you're talking to me." 

Oh, the third-person accident...happens so much.


----------



## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

^ I had to laugh at those two 

Don't worry, in a class of 60 people nobody would think twice about what you said.


----------



## Opiman (Aug 8, 2011)

Well.. I get my hair cut by this guy, same guy every month. He tries to act friendly and have a legitimate conversation with me (he's good friends with a friend of mine who actually referred me) and of course I'm always completely awkward and respond to questions with 5 word responses, etc. Needless to say he remembers who I am and I'm not just "another customer" like I would be at most places. So anyway, on my way out after paying:

Him: So that'll be 20 this time
Me: Great, thanks
Him: Have a great day!
Me: Yeah thanks. *walking out the door, realizing how dry this sounded* See ya... Soon... Ish... I hope..

WTF As if 

1) I wouldn't see him again because He's gonna die or something??
2) I'm not coming back because I hate my haircut
3) I hope to see him elsewhere because I'm some sort of weirdo??


----------



## TrickyTrick (Aug 14, 2011)

TimeToBegin said:


> I cringe just thinking about this.
> 
> Last semester in Psychology class, it was a big class with 60 students, the professor made us introduce ourselves one by one on the first day. We were supposed to say our name and what we were majoring in. When it was my turn, I was so nervous that I mumbled the stupidest thing, I said "*insert my name here* is undecided".
> I spoke in freakin third person. I hope no one remembers that.


AHAH LMFAO !!!! Loool
I'm feeling you, i know exactly which stupid feeling you had, but trust me, it wasn't a big deal probably and every one forgot about it.

This remember me of this video: 



(The part where he says David's not here!)


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## crispycritter (Aug 2, 2011)

haha.

i don't have a recent story to tell - it seems like i'm socially awkward 24/7 so it's hard to keep track.

but, recently i was vice president of my class. so i took a lot of pictures of everybody for the end of the year slide show. i was supposed to give them to my teacher who frequently jokes around and has an accent i can't understand all the time. there were a bunch of people in his office when i handed him the pictures and he said "there aren't any naked pictures on here, are there?"

i stared at him for 5 seconds to try to figure out what he said and i still didn't get it. then i said "...I don't think so." 

it was awkward.


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## gabriellenstuff (Aug 18, 2011)

Just a hour ago I was sitting in awkward silence with someone and felt something needed to be said so I blurted out "When I need to pee I shiver." I suck lol


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## kitkatstar1 (Jan 9, 2010)

Hmm.. I can't remember saying anything weird, I just tend to do a lot of weird things but I remember being in a supermarket once and the person on the till asked me if I wanted a bag for my shopping and I paniced and said no without realising what she'd said and, too embarrased to say that I wanted a bag, had to walk out balancing 3 days worth of shopping in my arms


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## Kusjmamire (Aug 20, 2011)

LOL today i had a little conversation with this guy, then i decided to leave so i said i'm out bye and gave the guy a handshake. Then for no reason it got awkward and i said 'So we seeing eachother another time maybe..' while i put my hand stiffly in the air again for a second handshake (WTF??) .
The guy looked at my hand like 'Why the hell is he sticking his hand out to me' and then gave me the 'wtf look' then after 3 seconds of still not getting his hand i panicked, was almost gonna shout 'Shake my hand!!' but just said a psychopath 'Bye.' and left quickly and stiff.

Total retardedness... Why did i have to offer a second handshake ???:roll:stu

The guy probably thought i was trying to do some exorcist/satanist ritual on him.:twisted


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## Addler (Apr 28, 2011)

woman: have a good day
me: you, too
woman: goodbye
me: you, too :no


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## nkprasad12 (Aug 27, 2011)

"Blah blah blah or something blah something?"
"Yes. :sus"


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

gabriellenstuff said:


> Just a hour ago I was sitting in awkward silence with someone and felt something needed to be said so I blurted out "When I need to pee I shiver." I suck lol


:lol


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## Vital (Apr 9, 2011)

I was in my arts class. I didn't know what to do in an exercise so I started thinking about asking the teacher for help. He was far from me. The words simply couldn't get out of my mouth so I could call him. Thought about calling his name for minutes (His name is Anderson). Suddenly I hear myself scream incredibly loud "Han!!" (supposed to be hey Anderson I guess...)


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## missalyssa (Jun 18, 2011)

I ask questions a lot just so I'm not being quiet so a friend ordered a shot and I said "what's in it?" And idk if I wasn't heard or if they heard just ignored me (which I think is usually the case). So I repeated and still nobody answered... Then a few minutes later after we got another round of the shots I asked how it was made and someone said "you ask that a lot"...


----------



## ChiefHuggingBear (Sep 10, 2011)

Her: I'm Maggie

Me: I'm Bryan, It's pleasure meeting you

Her: Nice meeting you also

Me: I'm Bryan BTW, nice meeting you also

(Awkward silence)

=)


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## Silverella (Sep 17, 2011)

:lol These are actually making me LOL -

I'm sure i've said worse, but one that's at the top of my mind:

Waitress: 'so how old are you?'
Me: 'Good'
:no

I think we all need to calm down and listen a bit more :lol


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## Silverella (Sep 17, 2011)

OMG I remembered another recent bad one - I worked in a place where I had to ask a coworker if he wanted a map. I COULD NOT say this guy's name (hardly anyone could but he really tried to teach me) or more like I could't summon up the guts to try...he was really cute too, just to make it a million times worse...anyway, I had to attract his attention and he was a little way away. Obv I couldn't call his name. So I just looked over and shouted, 'MAP!' Omfg hkfndbfg i'm going red just thinking about it :cry


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## Silverella (Sep 17, 2011)

laura024 said:


> The scene: At Panera Bread on a date.


 Ahhh Panera Bread. I always freeze in there cos it's just too...damn...complicated...always end up ordering just the same soup and that's bad enough. Sorry, I'll stop posting now


----------



## Haruhi (Jul 8, 2011)

-i like you
-me 2 but you.
was alot of stuttering involved also =(.


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## lonelywoman (Sep 11, 2011)

The most stupid line Ive ever said!
My niece of pretty much the same age as I, which I hadnt seen in years came over for a visit, a few years ago. The first thing she said was ' You look older.

Then she invited me the next day to go to her sister which I also hadnt seen in years, a woman in her thirties. I was so nervous for that visit, that when I saw her I didnt know what to say and automatically repeated the same line my niece said to me without thinking what I was saying!! I said something like, O Hi, (kissing) U look older.

I didnt even know what I had said exactly and how offensive it was, untill whe were inside in the livingroom and she said to me. What did U mean when u said I look older?? I cant remember what Ive answered, but she was ofended clearly, although she didnt wanted to show it too much cause I was her guest. Im sure she stll remembers it and she and her sister dislike me.


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## voitzify (Aug 16, 2011)

Can't really think of anything specific, but it tend to happen for me. I've become better at correcting myself though.


----------



## spacebound_rocketship (Nov 21, 2009)

-Silence-

Boarders gf: Wow that sun is nice today.
Me: ...yepp

....lol


----------



## me shy gurl (Sep 25, 2011)

I can't remember anything I have said lately but awhile back when I was working I had a CPR training to go to. After it was over, I was waiting for my ride who was late so the instructor decided to stay with me till my ride showed up since it was dark. He asked me how long I have lived in CA which I answered all my life. He then began to talk about his skiing vacation at Lake Tahoe. I was so nervous and uncomfortable I said "Oh it snows there?" He looked at me like I was kidding. I should of played it off as I was just joking around but didnt- turned red, I just know it....so embarassing!

The other day I had an ultrasound for my ovary cyst. The receptionist gave me directions to get in my gown and where to go and wait. I was so nervous I wasn't really listning to him so after I got in my hospital gown I got lost in the back of the hospital and coundn't find my way back- almost ended up outside. 

Although it's been hard on all of you, reading all of your responses, I feel a little better I 'm not alone.


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## Liana27 (Sep 16, 2011)

Not long ago, I asked a man for directions to the leisure centre as I'm quite new to the town I now live in. But instead of asking 'do you know where the leisure centre is'?, I said 'do you know where the leather centre is?' loll, I went really red, he started laughing, I did too. Was still embarrassing though! Lol.


----------



## electronic cigarettes (Sep 25, 2011)

Earlier today my mom called me and she was making me extremely nervous over trivial crap as usual, so to piss her off I just started imitating her repeating my first name over and over again until she hung up.


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## The Professor (Jul 31, 2011)

lonelywoman said:


> The most stupid line Ive ever said!
> My niece of pretty much the same age as I, which I hadnt seen in years came over for a visit, a few years ago. The first thing she said was ' You look older.
> 
> Then she invited me the next day to go to her sister which I also hadnt seen in years, a woman in her thirties. I was so nervous for that visit, that when I saw her I didnt know what to say and automatically repeated the same line my niece said to me without thinking what I was saying!! I said something like, O Hi, (kissing) U look older.
> ...


lmao that's so funny. I've done that too and I hate it: repeating what someone else said to someone else just because your memory is the only functioning part of your brain at that moment.


----------



## TallGuy (May 31, 2011)

Not one all that recent to report, but a girl I know has started hanging around with me in school a little, and I just know it's coming. THAT moment


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## Kathykook (Aug 16, 2011)

Kinda sad that I can't remember


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## JustKittenRightMeow (Jul 25, 2011)

Well I'm a bit out of it today. Earlier when I was at the grocery store, I was waiting in line to check out and a lady said excuse me because she needed to get something from a small candy rack next to me and I suddenly blurted out "I really have to take a crap right now.." and people stared at me like O_O.

I honestly don't know how I managed to say that, but I was thinking about how I really had to go and wanted to get home and this lady so close to me made me nervous and I also hate paying for my own things, so that made it worse.


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## mondayeyes (Sep 26, 2011)

I walked up to a coworker to begin a conversation with her along the lines of "oh, you're looking cheerful today... any reason why" and instead blurted, "you're looking really ugly today". I didn't even think that before I said it so I have no idea what happened between my brain and mouth!


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## workintowardsanew (Sep 10, 2011)

today i was buying a snack and some chick was ringing up my stuff and this black guy says "would you like a bag?"
I said, "what?" because i didnt hear him.
He repeated the same thing, to which I replied
"Did I lock my bag?"
finally figured it out and said "oh, no". and left.


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## forex (Dec 29, 2010)

was walking with a friend also jobless so we were chatting and he said we need to find easy jobs without alot of requirements and he said you could do service calls , i was like nooo i cant do that , he said it is easy for a month or so and i told him it suits you better that job you'r more complete ....
and he said like wtf more complete that sounds stupid ....
and i tried to explain in words what i meant with complete .....


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## mondayeyes (Sep 26, 2011)

When someone says thank you I tend to mush you're welcome and no problem together and respond "You're Problem" or "No Welcome".


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## James_Russell (Aug 26, 2011)

A few hours ago.

"yeah" *voice cracks horribly*

Didn't say another word.


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## Diacetylmorphine (Mar 9, 2011)

Today:

KFC Girl: Eat here or Take away?
Me: Umm, eat here please.
KFC: There you go enjoy your meal.
Me: Thanks, you too .................. :|


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## rvandall (Oct 9, 2011)

Tonight my brother and his girlfriend are flying to England and when everyone was saying bye at the airport.
His girlfriend hugged me and she's like "I'm going to miss you so much" and I was like "yeah, same"
I felt so dumb that.


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## SupaDupaFly (Sep 1, 2011)

This one time i was on a date with this girl and we decided to stop in a comic book store. Little did i know and came so unexpected.We bumped into one of her friend's who were on a date too. She presented me to them "hey this is ray" *me smiling* they waving I extend my hand so weirdly like im in a job interview meeting and give them a handshake then walk to the nearest comic book and start to read it. I wanted to run out that store so quick. :sus


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## Lyrical Lonely (Oct 5, 2011)

I went to the office at my college to ask for help with something, and this guy that worked in the office introduced himself. I tried to say "Nice to meet you," but it came out as "Nice." IT SOUNDED SO RUDE.

:cry

So I tried to pass it off as a really bad stutter.


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## dandynamo (Oct 14, 2011)

I was getting off the bus of a double decker upstairs and when i got up to leave i hit my head. A girl next to me asked if i was ok which i replied with a nervous laugh "yeah, sorry" instead of "yeah i'm ok, thanks"..


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## incito (Oct 12, 2011)

Today I wasn't paying attention to where I was going and ran into this guy. He grabbed my waist to keep me from falling over I guess and it made me extremely nervous, so when he said he was sorry and asked if I was okay I said "oh, I mean yeah." And then I ran away because I was tearing up D:


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## dlennr (Jul 6, 2007)

I had one chance to talk to this speaker/scientist who had a profound impact on me at a special event at a planetarium. But instead of telling him about the amazing sense of awe I had that night, about how I almost cried, about how it was the highlight of my trip, I just said "I really enjoyed it." So lame.


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## The Lost Boy (Nov 23, 2011)

:lolBumped cause this is funny thread


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## theresabell (Nov 25, 2011)

Or not said? Not very funny, but happens to me a lot and is always awkward, today at the library very polite librarian, as usual, says hello to me and I try saying hello back but no sound really comes out. :blank Its frustrating, the words just wont come out.


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## whataaaaaa (Nov 6, 2009)

A week or so ago I was at work cleaning the floors with a mop. My boss told me to do them extra good because his boss was coming in the next morning. As I'm nearly finished he walks over and looks around at the floor:

Him: "The floors look really good bud."

Me: "Ok."

Silence...

He walks away and goes into the freezer.


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

theresabell said:


> Or not said? Not very funny, but happens to me a lot and is always awkward, today at the library very polite librarian, as usual, says hello to me and I try saying hello back but no sound really comes out. :blank Its frustrating, the words just wont come out.


I passed by someone on campus I met last semester. He said "Hey what's up" to me and I walked by without saying anything. :|


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## crazyg (Jun 18, 2005)

A former co-worker was showing me how to do some stuff on the company website. I was really nervous and he was directing me as to what to type and where to go on the computer. Because he was staring at me, it was making it that much more difficult to get it done, so I thought it might just be easier if he showed me and I could take notes. So, I awkwardly said: "Could you just do it, please?" 

Then, he said: "No, this is the whole reason you were hired. It's part of your job." He thought I was asking him to actually just do the work, rather than just show me how to do it. I was flustered and didn't immediately understand what he meant so I just said "Ok" rather than actually explaining to him what I wanted him to do. He must think I'm a terrible worker...bah.


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## northstar1991 (Oct 4, 2011)

What a funny thread I can relate!  One time at college I was talking to a guy and he asked if I played sports. I said that I played softball. He then talked about how softballs really aren't soft. I replied with something along the lines of "They're more like hard balls." Then I realized how inapproprite that sounds. He didn't see to mind. He replied with "Then people would get the wrong idea." I got embarassed and said I didn't mean it that way. He laughed.


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## Syndacus (Aug 9, 2011)

Can i have a to go goto gota box?


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## kos (May 19, 2009)

An immigrant covenience store worker was talking to me and I had no idea what the **** she was saying so I nodded and laughed nervously then got the **** outta there.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

Well mine is kinda bad.. I was walking around the block by myself one night and a cop car pulled up beside me. I wasnt doing anything wrong, but I get nervous around any kind of authority. He asked me what my age is and I was like "Im uh... Im.. 18." And he looked at me really weird and suspicious. He told me to get back inside because the cerfew was 10. For some reason I have a problem telling people my age lol. When I was 16 (and had a life) I was at a friends house who had a crush on me. We were sitting with a bunch of other guys and one of his friends asked me how old I was. For some reason I just spit out "14" and then turned bright red because everyone looked at me in shock. I was soooo embarrassed but I didnt take it back because it wouldve sounded stupid. I never talked to them again after that lol.


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## northstar1991 (Oct 4, 2011)

I have another one to tell but it's not about me. Once at a restaurant my socially awkward cousin ordered a burger. when the waitress asked him how he would like it, he said with ketchup instead of medium well.


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## The Lost Boy (Nov 23, 2011)

:lol^^


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## loquaciousintrovert (May 23, 2011)

G-good, h-how are y-you?


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## Lonely girly (Nov 17, 2011)

Friend: Do you have some water?

Me: Yeah...
Friend waiting for me to give her the water while I'm playing with my phone, trying to look busy and waiting for her to go away.

Other friend: Well give it to her...

Me: Oh I'm sorry, do you want some?

Both of them talking to each other: Wow she's really wierd.


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## icemocha3 (Nov 18, 2010)

this thread is the best. it's so funny. sorry i'm so entertained by other people's embarrassment. Thank you so much for cheering me up


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## manjam2 (Nov 27, 2011)

When I was a kid, I went Trick Or Treating with my Family. For some reason My mind was wandering and I was thinking of the word "Excuse me" And I walked up to the house and instead of "Trick or Treat" I yelled "Excuse me" At the poor woman handing out candy.


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

Uuumm.....do u reallly think that's OK??? To my ex, getting undressed in front of me, while we were in a hotel room, not long ago.


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## icemocha3 (Nov 18, 2010)

> And this one I was really embarrassed about: I was sitting on the bus between an old man and an old woman, who were both Russian-speaking, like me. A pregnant woman got on and the old man gave her his seat. I should have gotten up and given him my seat, but I remained sitting. And then him and the old woman were talking in Russian about how I'm so stupid and have such bad manners.:um :um A little while later, an American old man with a cane got on, and the Russian woman gave him her seat. And he was like, "Thank you, you didn't have to do that. There are young people here, who should respect their elders..." I couldn't take it anymore, so I just got up and sprinted to the back of the bus. Simply awful.:afr :afr :afr


you shouldn't have to give up your seat for pregnant people.. last i heard pregnancy is not a disability. that is so stupid. those people were a**holes


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## mapthesoul (Nov 2, 2010)

Today I was shopping for clothing, and was waiting in line for the fitting room. I wasn't wearing my contacts at the time so everything further than about two feet away from me was blurry. A guy who worked at the store was on the hall across from all the changing rooms. I was really nervous as well so I just mumbled if I could have a changing room please. I wasn't sure if he had heard me too well so I stared at him trying to see if his eyes were looking at mine. This was fairly easy to do because his eyes were so blurry to me that it didn't make me anxious. 

Eventually I look away and then stared at the wall in front of me.. and then back at the guy. He waved his hand at me. I guess he did see me after all. :? He unlocked a dressing room and I, again, mumbled thanks. After trying on my clothes, I became too afraid to walk out of the room. I didn't want the guy to see me. I did end up walking out though, and as soon as I did, he asked me "How did it fit for you?" I was shaking and said "Yes... Er, good!" He looked at me strangely. The things I say when I get nervous.. :no


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## mrswolstenholme (Nov 26, 2011)

One time at school I walked out of the building to another one, with the teacher I just had a lesson with. Suddenly he asked me "everything alright, N.?" and I didn't expect that question at all, because he usually says that as a greeting. But since I had talked to him before, I was really confused and I thought "is this supposed to be small talk or does he REALLY want to know how I am? Maybe he has noticed that I'm NOT okay and wants to help me" So I completely drifted off in my mind, without realising that he was still waiting for my answer. But I just didn't say anything, until he said "God, N., you really need to learn small talk!!" I felt so stupid...


----------



## The Lost Boy (Nov 23, 2011)

My uncle was dropping off his dogs at our house last week because he was going on vaction for a few weeks. So I go downstairs to greet him and i asked him where he was flying to, and he tells me china and thailand...And I said ohh cool chiland ..nice... I meant to say china and thailand. He was just like yea....then I walked outta the house.


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## Dioque (Dec 3, 2011)

I said "Good night" to someone when it was 2 in the afternoon. 

"Are you talking to somebody?" 

"No," I replied when I just talked to somebody I just met.

"Would you like to pay by cash or credit card?"

"Trash....Oh.. he...ummm...cash".


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## Huk phin (Oct 30, 2011)

Wow, it looks like you lost A LOT of weight.


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## Slogger (Dec 14, 2010)

Huk phin said:


> Wow, it looks like you lost A LOT of weight.


Ha, ha. There was a coworker I hadn't seen in a long time, and he used to be obese. When I saw him again, he'd lost a bunch of weight. I asked him, "Have you been sick?"


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## devin880 (Apr 30, 2011)

I used to work at a dollarstore. I remember one time after I had been working all day and telling people, "Hi, How are you doing?" "Have a nice day" these people came in line and I was like "Thankyou, Have a nice day". They were like, "What?". That was really embarrassing.


----------



## kitkatstar1 (Jan 9, 2010)

My psychology teacher handed me my exam paper back and said 'You got an A! Well done!' and I replied with 'Oh, sorry'. :um


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## schnitzelmann (Nov 26, 2011)

When I went to work in the morning and went down the stairs, I bumped into a neighbor of mine. She's over 80 years old.

She: "Have a nice work day! "
Me: "Thanks. You too!"


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## KevinD (Dec 17, 2009)

Don't feel bad, schnitzelmann, I told my hairdresser to enjoy the rest of her weekend right after she cut my hair on a Saturday.


----------



## Glacial (Jun 16, 2010)

crazyg said:


> A former co-worker was showing me how to do some stuff on the company website. I was really nervous and he was directing me as to what to type and where to go on the computer. Because he was staring at me, it was making it that much more difficult to get it done, so I thought it might just be easier if he showed me and I could take notes. So, I awkwardly said: "Could you just do it, please?"
> 
> Then, he said: "No, this is the whole reason you were hired. It's part of your job." He thought I was asking him to actually just do the work, rather than just show me how to do it. I was flustered and didn't immediately understand what he meant so I just said "Ok" rather than actually explaining to him what I wanted him to do. He must think I'm a terrible worker...bah.


This sounds like something that would happen to me. I absolutely dread learning new jobs because you know there are high expectations and people watch your every move when they are training you. I always feel like such an idiot, even though I am really not.


----------



## LainToWired (Nov 10, 2011)

I randomly bumped into this acquaintance: 

Them:"How are you finding university?"

Me: "Yes."

Them: "Yes?" -amused look-


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## Yogurt (Nov 1, 2010)

At work the guy I'm crushing on was walking out of the breakroom with a girl and they stopped to talk to me because I made a joke about how serious they looked because they were both walking with straight faces. So we're talking and he jokes with me about how I supposedly "promised to buy him an Ipad" and I couldn't think of anything clever to say back so I kinda gave this awkward "Oooh yeah okay haha" and the girl looked at me funny and I felt stupid. Lol. She's the type who always seems to have something interesting and funny to say back when someone is joking with her. Not me. Lol.


----------



## Raisins (Aug 4, 2011)

My aunt and uncle just came over.

"How's school?"
"Yes"

"Well you've said your 3 words for today"
"Yes"

"What's going on"
"Yes"


----------



## booored (Jun 19, 2011)

i have a tendency to say sorry to people. so one time i was waiting in the car while my mom was at the store. the door was unlocked. all of a sudden an old lady opens the door to the passenger seat by mistake and im all like "IM SOORY". funny thing is i didnt see her face at first so i didnt know it was an old lady, i thought it was someone trying to hijack the car, yet i tell them im sorry? i felt so stupid after that.


----------



## heyJude (Aug 1, 2009)

I was cleaning the break room at work the other night when my boss walked in. I couldn't think of anything to say to him. I spotted a box of opened crackers sitting on the table and asked him if he knew whose it was. Why must I ask stupid questions like that?! LOL Story of my life...


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## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

heyJude said:


> I was cleaning the break room at work the other night when my boss walked in. I couldn't think of anything to say to him. I spotted a box of opened crackers sitting on the table and asked him if he knew whose it was. Why must I ask stupid questions like that?! LOL Story of my life...


:teeth

sorry, but that's pretty funny,

I said "thanks man" to a young female cashier today, smooth.. :/


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## heyJude (Aug 1, 2009)

JimmyDeansRetartedCousin said:


> :teeth
> 
> sorry, but that's pretty funny,
> 
> I said "thanks man" to a young female cashier today, smooth.. :/


lol it is...but sooo painfully awkward at the time!

I once said "Have a great day, ma'am." to an elderly man after I bagged his groceries. It wasn't even daytime, it was nightime, too.

Oh we are real smooth, yo. :b


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## idiotboy (Sep 30, 2011)

i was at a store earlier and a clerk asked if i needed any help.

"no, i'm just...fartin' around."


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## sansd (Mar 22, 2006)

"Sorry" when the person I was talking to dropped his bag of carrots. I guess I was feeling like it was my fault he dropped it because I distracted him by speaking (what a jerk I am :b).

I probably said other weird/awkward things during the same conversation, but that's what stands out most. I wondered if I should say something about it after it came out, but he just ignored it and started talking.


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## Banzai (Jun 4, 2009)

I say "I see...." a lot. 

A:"so right, I was hanging out with a friend and we were doing a, b, c and then SUDDENLY, x, y and z happened and it was SO COOL"
Me: I see......


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## Kon (Oct 21, 2010)

I told my boss to "*fk off*" at a Christmas party last night. I meant it as a joke but my wife and the people around the table were shocked. He's a relative and I didn't mean anything by it but my wife told me that you don't say stuff like that especially when his wife and son were listening. I'm supposed to e-mail an apology but I'm not sure. That's why I hate social settings. I always say something stupid when I open my mouth. And I wouldn't even know it was a dumb thing to say until it was pointed out to me. And he actually gave me a bonus and has helped out immensely. I'm such a social retard.


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## Mocha Freak (Dec 3, 2011)

The other day I was in a public restroom, and a girl pointed at my shoes and said, "Oh! I have those sames shoes in black!" And I couldn't think of anything to say, so I just kind of looked at her for a second... and then said "... cool!"

But really, what are you supposed to say to that?


----------



## tyleote (Dec 4, 2011)

I was getting helped out by a clerk tonight at a local dispensary. I noticed she started sending me signals and asked my name - I was able to answer that ok but it started a panic. She asked what I was doing this weekend and I couldn't say anything so I just turned away and pretended to be looking at something until the transaction was over. Felt like a total ***!


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## IfUSeekAmy (Oct 5, 2011)

mimcofied said:


> Oh and I also have a thing of saying "Thankyou" for everything... if someone borrows something from me or i do something for them...I SAY THANKYOU!!!!!!!!! WTFFFF


I DO THIS ALL THE TIME!!!  I thought I was the only one.


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## Ortelius (Aug 22, 2011)

When I arrived to school 8.00 AM a few days ago...

Another student: "Good morning, 'my name'."
Me: "Good day..."

Me quickly walks away.


I tend to thank for everything as well. It's really awkward.


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## Witchcraft (Jan 19, 2010)

Last night at my bf's co-workers Christmas party.
We ordered beer and when the waitress brought it to us, one of my bf's colleagues asked what it was (meaning what kind of beer it was) and I replied "Something"


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## randomprecision (Aug 19, 2011)

I can make small talk now. Sometimes more than i should. Sometimes i manage to produce a sentence like "rain might on Tuesday" or "your dropped baby his pacifier". Mabye i should go back to silence.


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## idiotboy (Sep 30, 2011)

i was watching an episode of the cartoon 'home movies' the other day where the main kid's mom is at a parent-teacher conference. she apparently has SA, because she starts telling them how uncomfortable she is at the conferences. "yeah, i start saying all these inappropriate things. it's just '**** this' and '**** that' and y'know '****in' phonics.' /takes off shirt/ i am really hot in here; can i just remove this?" funny, but rang a little true.


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## Kathykook (Aug 16, 2011)

At Best Buy, I asked this dude if they had the 1996 version of Hamlet. He looked at me and said, "no, we don't have those right now."
Me: "oh, we don't?" Then he gave me the "wtf" stare. In a moment of panic, I blurted out, "ok, bye," and ran off.


( btw, I love reading these XD)


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

At work once, I had to make a phone call to a vendor, to collect money they owed us. I nearly died before I even picked up the phone. I started stuttering, which happens very rarely but when it does, it's bad. I got v/mail, & halfway thru my message I said "so if you you y yooouuuu can g g givvvuhme a call back at your er er erliest conven con c conveeeeeeeeenience". I just died after I hung up. She called back & started laughing at me hysterically. My boss never asked me to do that again.


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## Love Minus Zero (Mar 23, 2011)

Oh god I forgot about this thread.

This happened around Halloween, when a coworker wanted me to work his shift. At the time my boyfriend was going to dress up in drag for a costume.

Coworker: Can you work tomorrow?
Me: Umm...no, see I have to help my boyfriend crossdress because he's a crossdresser and he dresses like a woman.
Coworker: *wtf glare* Yea...no problem. 

I just felt so nervous, and like I needed a good excuse, and that was all I had. lol.

Another time I combined "night" and "day" and told a lady to have a "Good Dight"


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## kaykay609 (May 30, 2011)

I espescially do the say thank you to everything-thing. A few days ago I told a cashier "thank you" as I was giving her the cash. She looked at me weird with a look on her face as if she thought: for what, looking after the money you just gave me? That's something new, people who thank you for taking their money.


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## bcr (Aug 17, 2011)

I was in a meeting with interviewers and other applicants to ask questions and get to know the interviewers. There was food there and one of the interviewers asked me "Are you hungry?" I said "No." She said "Are you nervous?" and I said "Both."


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## Chairman Dan (Jul 20, 2010)

Person: "Happy birthday"
Me: "You too"


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## shelbster18 (Oct 8, 2011)

I remember when I went to order some food from a restaurant to go. The guy gave me my food and he asked me something. I said "Yes m'am." :rain And one of the girls there was just looking at me weird. I was really embarassed.


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## sansd (Mar 22, 2006)

TenYears said:


> At work once, I had to make a phone call to a vendor, to collect money they owed us. I nearly died before I even picked up the phone. I started stuttering, which happens very rarely but when it does, it's bad. I got v/mail, & halfway thru my message I said "so if you you y yooouuuu can g g givvvuhme a call back at your er er erliest conven con c conveeeeeeeeenience". I just died after I hung up. She called back & started laughing at me hysterically. My boss never asked me to do that again.


This reminds me of when I gave someone his own number as my number when leaving a message.


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## tohellandback (Aug 28, 2011)

I don't remember certain cases per say, but the point is that I can make people feel VERY uncomfortable at any given point.


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## bottleofblues (Aug 6, 2008)

Jennifer Clayton said:


> I think the key thing to remember in these situations is that we should not fret over them. Yes, they suck. Yes, some are horribly humiliating. But if we start to obsess over all the tiny things that we think we did wrong, we will make a mountain out of a moehill.
> 
> People without SA screw up, too. They just typically don't obsess over it like we do. I hate acting like everything is a gazillion times worse than it is.


I nominate this as the sas quote of the day, some great words of wisdom, i'm gonna copy this down and keep it.


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## littlemisshy (Aug 10, 2010)

randomprecision said:


> I can make small talk now. Sometimes more than i should. Sometimes i manage to produce a sentence like "rain might on Tuesday" or "your dropped baby his pacifier". Mabye i should go back to silence.


Goodness! I do the same thing!! Jumble up all my words:yes Then I wish I the floor would just swallow me up right then and there......


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## littlemisshy (Aug 10, 2010)

There I go again!^^ 'I' the floor!:roll


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## littlemisshy (Aug 10, 2010)

Oh, thought of one. 
While ordering a latte: "Could I please have a latte...with milk please":teeth


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## ThrashtilDeath (Mar 21, 2009)

Ordering at a restaurant: 

Me: Ummmm I'll have the uhhhh cheese...STEAK

Waiter: With fries?

Me: Uhhhh YEP *nodding like a child*

Waiter: Gravy on the side?

Me: Sure! (didn't even think about)

Waiter: Oookay...


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## northstar1991 (Oct 4, 2011)

I think it's about time to revive this thread!  Recently someone asked me a question and I shook my head yes and said no. I've done that quite a few times.


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## sansd (Mar 22, 2006)

northstar1991 said:


> I think it's about time to revive this thread!  Recently someone asked me a question and I shook my head yes and said no. I've done that quite a few times.


I can't think of anything amusing to post here, but this reminds me of how I've been having a lot of things not come out at all like what I meant to say and feeling dishonest and guilty as a result. :|


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## GroupHug (Jan 27, 2012)

I was talking this girl on the phone and she was telling me about how she drinks green tea. She drew a blank trying to remember the term of one specific health benefit it had and asked me if I had any idea. What immediately came out of my mouth was: "Aphrodisiac???".... :bash

I meant to say antioxidants.


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## Onomatopoeia (May 27, 2011)

Me: Hey there! How are you?
Cute girl: I'm good, thanks. How are you?
Me: I'm fine thank you, how are y-- ...oops!

:blush................................:hide


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## heyJude (Aug 1, 2009)

^I can't even begin to tell you how many times that has happened to me. lol!

An older man was making conversation with me while I was working the other night. He was like, "Oh I bet you can't wait to get home and call your boyfriend!" Me: "Oh, I don't have a boyfriend. I'm totally single." Older man: "So can I get your number??" Me: (thinking to myself) Fuuuuuuuuuu. Why oh why, did I tell him I was single! He probably thought I was flirting with him...:/


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## MissGemmaRogers (Nov 17, 2011)

I started my new job and this guy said Hey Gemma im ..... and I replied with Hi! Im Gemma. >.<


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## ufotofu (Dec 9, 2011)

I remember once, I was at a new church, and I was really nervous giving introductions and making small talk. It was raining outside and this girl said
"The weather is so weird, huh?" 
To which I replied, "Yeah, it's so erotic, isn't it?"
When I actually meant erratic because it had been sunny and then raining and being really unpredictable!
She looked a bit uncomfortable, and looked at me strangely.
I didn't notice it then, because I thought I did say erratic, but when I went home I finally realised. Lol I must have looked like a real weirdo to her, especially when we were at a church! :doh


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## Rastaziggy (Feb 21, 2012)

These were really embarrassing:
I asked for a 12 foot subway sandwich instead of 12".
One time someone asked me "How are you?" I mixed up "Not bad" and "I'm good" so my response came out as "Not good"... Facepalm


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## ThrashtilDeath (Mar 21, 2009)

ufotofu said:


> I remember once, I was at a new church, and I was really nervous giving introductions and making small talk. It was raining outside and this girl said
> "The weather is so weird, huh?"
> To which I replied, "Yeah, it's so erotic, isn't it?"
> When I actually meant erratic because it had been sunny and then raining and being really unpredictable!
> ...


HAHAHA. Rain IS erotic. Why else would so many people make out in it?


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## Jpapi (Mar 11, 2012)

Shared a table with a girl all semester and we talked a little after class sometimes and durring group work. I liked her a little, but thought she was out of my league. Looking back, I see that she was flirting with me most of the time. SA kept me from realizing it. 

The worst was on the last day of classes. She finished her final 1st and I finished 10 minutes later. When I left the room she was waiting for me and we talked all the way down the hallway and down the stairs. At the bottom of the stairs, she goes right and I go left to leave. As we are leaving she says something "happy holidays....something...something....something" (forgot exactly what it was). My response was "see you around". I know I shoud've asked for her number or at least email. 

I've had similar situations my whole life. Luckily I have been able to catch a few, but more often than not, I miss the signals.


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## lmw (Feb 17, 2012)

Mine are all semi-embarrassing. I work as a front desk clerk at a hotel, and this guys were making jokes about what they were going to do tonight (they weren't serious) but I was so nervous that I responded in a totally serious way, like wow, you're doing that? I am also always inadvertently rude and fake laugh as a response to everything. (which gets weird after the 3rd time)


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## A Void Ant (Mar 10, 2012)

.


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## VintageClothes (Mar 12, 2012)

I went into a clothing store/boutique and whenever the worker there said "hello" I always replied (in my anxiety I figured she must no have seen me and worried that I'd seem rude otherwise).
It ended with me having said "hello" about ten times by the time I was done shopping.


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## VintageClothes (Mar 12, 2012)

oh, and also this one time, when I was at art class, one of my classmates tried to engage me in conversation and was deep into a story about how she saw a bear when she was camping once and when she was finished she looked at me expectantly (as par normal conversation, people usually take turns talking. I however was in a SA panic and was unaware of such) and in my panic I just said the first thing that came to mind that was even remotely about bears, so to her "and there was this bear just _sitting there, _isn't that crazy?" I said "ummm, my grandma lives in the mountains, which has bears. I think...but she has dogs too, so if there was, like, a bear in her house she'd know, unless the bear attacked the dogs or something...."
God, that was awkward.


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## Taylorshane (Mar 9, 2012)

at school once the substitute called my name and it took me like 30 seconds to respond , but by then my classmates already said i was here :|


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## heyJude (Aug 1, 2009)

I had to ask my manager for the keys to the trash compactor so I could throw out the collected trash and kept fretting over the fact that he was not so pleased with me earlier for "standing around and talking" with one of my coworkers (which rarely ever happens, but when it does I always seem to get caught). When I finally asked for the keys, it came out like this- "Can I have the trash to the keys?"

oh dear god, why!


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## cool786 (Oct 4, 2011)

good lord some of these are so funny, im reading and crying with laughter...

my stories are much worse, and i dont feel like sharing


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## harrypotter (Sep 13, 2011)

I work at a fast food place. Once I went into mcdonalds and had this strange moment where I thought I was the server and i said "HI THERE!" in the same voice I use to greet customers at work. It was a weird and awkward moment but she seemed too tired to give a ****.


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## kanra (Nov 27, 2011)

I thought I recognized my friend facing the other direction and I decided to wave, and then he turned around and he was a complete stranger. It was pretty awkward. 

And then when someone says "I love you" I end up saying "thanks" or "okay."

When someone says something or asks something I didn't hear, I nod or say "yeah" to avoid asking them. XD heh, it backfires a lot.


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## mapthesoul (Nov 2, 2010)

I didn't exactly say anything. More like strange, inaudible noises. I was sitting in class and one guy turned to me and told me a joke. I've forgotten what it was now, but I didn't find it funny so, trying to act like I found it funny out of politeness, I just made some odd cough-like sound while raising my eyebrows and trying to smile. Quickly realizing how stupid I must have looked, I turned back to my paper and began writing. Why did I even try to laugh? Faking a laugh plus being really nervous is not a good combination.


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## biffyclyroluver (Mar 4, 2012)

Haha these are all so funny! I say stuff like this all the time because I forget or rush what I say. 
At the ice rink I went to the cafe and went to ask for an orange king tango...but I rushed and ended up saying 'ummm...could I have a ch...an orange ching tango...errr...an orange err...tango please?'...then I paniced and walked off without waiting for them to give it to me...opps!
I also do it when I text. One of the people from the rink was texting me, and it went something like this:

Him: Hey, hows you?
Me: I'm ok thanks, you?
Him: I'm good, I'm at the rink
Me: Cool, I will go there next week, its been ages since I've skated!
Him: Ok
Me: Haha thats good! 

What is wrong with me?!


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## PulchritudinousDemise (Dec 7, 2011)

I tend to combine words like in Mean Girls when lindsay Lohan says "grool"..that's me everyday...


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## becky07 (Feb 15, 2012)

At an interview a couple weeks ago i said i never miss work unless "im deathly ill". Face palm. The dude looked at me like wrf and said i dint have to be dying to miss work but to not do it often lol

A professor was being *****y to me and i
Told her i didnt realize that i was suppose to interact with her, that im there to learn from her. She didnt like that too good lol


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## kanra (Nov 27, 2011)

Yesterday in class we were having our stupid required class discussion and my grade was dropping because I never said anything. So, desperate as I was, this happened (the kid was really talkative and talked a lot in the discussion and there was never really an opening for me to talk):

Kid: I think --

Me: UMM..

Kid::shock
(the whole class was staring at me and started laughing)

Me: Err.. Benvolio is like the opposite of Montague..

Teacher: ... Yeah, he's Benvolio's foil.









I could shoot myself. I swear, that was one of the most awkward moments in my entire life.


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## Alvy86 (Apr 21, 2011)

At the end of class we're supposed to leave our assignments on the prof's desk before leaving. In my usual haste to escape, I make a beeline up the aisle toward the front of the class but some girls were still in their seats talking and right as I passed by this girl was gesturing and she stuck her arm out and hit me right in the crotch. She quickly apologized and I said, "Excuse me" and gave a nervous laugh. Then there was this awkward pause and I guess in an attempt to break the awkwardness the girl says, "Got ya" and winks. I was kind of taken aback so I couldn't think of anything witty to say so I just said something like, "Yep. You sure did." My delivery was so deadpan that I think she thought I was really pissed off. As I walked away the girl and her friends were giggling. I didn't look back as I pretty much sprinted out of there.


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## A W Shucks (Apr 9, 2012)

I was standing on the platform and waiting for my train, really self-conscious and numbed out as usual, and this girl runs to me suddenly calling me Sasha and nearly hugs me.

Her: Hey Sasha how are you! Long time no see blah blah blah...
Me: ......(staring blankly)
Her: You're Sasha right? My ex-classmate? Blah blah blah...
Me: ......(staring blankly)
Her: ......
Me: (in deadpan voice) Sorry, you've got the wrong number.
Her: ???
Me: (in my weakest voice) I mean I'm not Sasha, excuse me.

She turns and walks away. The moment she turns away, the coolest, funniest, wittiest response ever pops into my head, but it's too late of course. Still waiting for another chick to mistake me for someone else.


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## Hadron92 (Apr 17, 2009)

i was on my way back from this trip in the army a few days ago and this soldier chick who i talked to for over an hour told me that she had to get off the bus. i was like, 'okay'. 

she looked kind of confused and then she said, 'stay in contact, will you?' and then it hit me and i said, 'oh...right. give me your number and I'll call you'. :roll.


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## Bryan108 (Mar 1, 2012)

I hate ot when im at the library and i want to get a book but theres some fat smelly dude hoggin the area where my book is and im too self conscious to go ovrr and say excuse me and get a book. Argh it pisses me off!!!!


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## cuppy (Oct 15, 2011)

A W Shucks said:


> I was standing on the platform and waiting for my train, really self-conscious and numbed out as usual, and this girl runs to me suddenly calling me Sasha and nearly hugs me.
> 
> Her: Hey Sasha how are you! Long time no see blah blah blah...
> Me: ......(staring blankly)
> ...


ahh what was the witty response? ^_^

For me it was today. Walking home from getting groceries, I noticed a person sitting on a bench. It was pretty dark, so I didn't notice them right away..
"Oh no a human" >____< i really hope they didn't hear. lol


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## misspeachy (Aug 11, 2011)

I was left to hold a baby I was looking after at this outside pre-school event... 

After a while, this lady came up to me and started cooing over the baby etc, she asked me in Italian what the baby's name was and because I was too focused on trying to understand the language I couldn't bring the baby's name to mind to answer her (it's really long and hard to pronounce which only made it harder at the time)

So, I just said "I can't remember" and laughed... I'm soo silly. I felt so foolish afterwards.


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## OtherBrain (Jul 4, 2013)

'Are you sure your OK?'


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## nrelax11 (Jun 9, 2013)

Just have to own up to those awkward moment and laugh at it. The last thing I can remember was a person asking me how my day was and I just said yea, smiled and walked away. One of those auto responses.


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## tearingmicrobe (Jun 13, 2013)

One time I called my teacher mom. Luckily, she didn't seem to hear me.
Also, when I was opening my bank account the woman helping me asked for my phone number and I don't actually know my home phone number :/ I felt like a complete idiot when I told her I had to go ask my mom for it. And then later when I was putting the money in the accounts she asked how much I wanted to put in each account. She suggested $50 in one and $30 in the other. I asked her if I could put $40 in each but I couldn't because I only had a fifty and a twenty and a ten. Again, I felt like an idiot. :bah


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## trs18 (Jun 24, 2013)

shanny086 said:


> this happens to me too. the WORST is when someone is waving or smiling and you think its to you and you respond and then realize its to the person behind you. i hate that!


I have did this a lot of times, and I get soooo
embarassed.


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## Beingofglass (May 5, 2013)

Herp Derp


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## PurrPanther (Nov 16, 2012)

I was downtown coming back from work and this guy who worked in the same dept was talking to me but I really wasn't paying attention because of so many people and everything (hadn't taken bus in a while). I heard : ''I got hired...'' so I said '''Oh COOL , nice that is just great!!!'' (trying to fake listening to him) then I walked to my bus stop and said bye.

then the next day I found out from someone he had actually gotten FIRED


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## xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxMrFunnyPants (Apr 1, 2013)

A friend introduced me to a girl once and I said hello 7 different ways without ever making a noise. Ended with my hands on hips with thumbs facing forward.


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## Sweetme (Jul 8, 2013)

just going to walmart *scares* me!!


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

Whoa I actually can't think of any recent ones. That's a good sign.


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## CWe (Mar 7, 2010)

There is alot of joy in a big butt boy, oops


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## iah (Oct 3, 2012)

these are expired matt why aren't you guys checking the dates?
(product isn't even ours)
get really nervous start to stutter a bit throw another product in the grocery basket almost hitting the person asking me. 
(feel even more awkward now)
(walk all jerky and weird)
Instead of realizing this was a joke and the guy was giving me a hard time like bros do I was like WAIT WHAT IS IT WHERE DOES IT GO YOUR TRIPPING ME OUT MAN came off whack felt like maybe i need to get my butt kicked now for being such a loser feel like if this wasn't at work i would have probably gotten more flake and possibly a butt kicking for just acting weird no wonder society spits on me man up puss bag
five minutes later think about what I should have said can't stop thinking about how I should have just been like WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT TYLER GET OUT OF HERE WITH THAT CRAP WE JUST ROTATED HALF TO STORE FFS
why could i just not have said that WHHHYYYYYYYYY


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## Onimaru (Jun 2, 2013)

The other day someone was talking to me(i was all quiet/awkward because i'm not used to people coming out of nowhere, chatting) and then he asked me which area i live in...and for some reason I stuttered and blurted out the area code instead...XD it's funny but i felt like a complete moron at the time.

He gave me this look like "ummmmmmmmm okaaaay"


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## Glass Child (Feb 28, 2013)

eVERYTHING


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## starsfreak (Aug 20, 2013)

It was back in the 6th or 7th grade. I was sitting next to a girl that really disliked me (for a reason I never understood, I always tried to be nice to everyone). She looked at me and she was about to mock me but then I said "Look somewhere else!" twice in a very awkward way. She couldn't stop laughing...


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## Ricebunnyx3 (Sep 1, 2010)

I cant think of anything specific but lately I've been substituting words w/ completely wrong words. I catch myself and correct myself but I still feel like an idiot and I can tell they think I'm an idiot for it.


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## Cam1 (Dec 4, 2011)

"Enjoy your food"

.... "you too"


I walked out of the store awkwardly then started laughing at myself.


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## AdamUK (May 1, 2004)

Cam1 said:


> "Enjoy your food"
> 
> .... "you too"
> 
> I walked out of the store awkwardly then started laughing at myself.


haha thats funny 

Okay it happened today, I went to get my hair cut and requested the beautiful hairdresser that she give me a number 3 on the top and 4 on the sides. We laughed.


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## Aquisse (May 31, 2013)

my sister made a very long sentence about something quite serious and my I didn't realize that i wasn't listening to a lot of it so I said.. "yeah, so i like peaches" which was a conversation about an hour ago we had about my cereal bar... I didn't think it would sound weird if I changed the subject but it did sound strange.


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

I saw awkward **** almost everyday, I just don't remember the details or any specifics to write them down here.


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## corbeaublanc (Jan 29, 2013)

"Have a good day"
"Have a good day" (I'm a parrot)

"Good night"
"love you too" :/ should have said it with a creepy smile.


countless others I can't remember at the moment


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## BlazingLazer (Jul 16, 2011)

Cam1 said:


> "Enjoy your food"
> 
> .... "you too"
> 
> I walked out of the store awkwardly then started laughing at myself.


You see, the "you too" I think is so common for us SAers (and even non-SAers do it enough!), that it's somehow stopped bothering me anymore.

Now, whenever I say it to someone, I just laugh about it and if the person is still within talking range after I realize my goof, I joke with the person that I did that and it usually goes over well, and that they understand.

No harm done, haha.


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## jme (Dec 31, 2008)

My most recent embarrassing SA moment (since I react awkwardly to compliments from people) was with a guy working at the coffee shop I go to once a week. For reference I'm in my mid 20s.

Guy: You're not wearing your hair in braids today. I liked them last week.
Me: Oh I don't wear my hair like that often, it makes me look like I'm 15.
Guy: That's not why I liked them...


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## Marlboro Red (Sep 8, 2013)

I always over-emphasise my '*THANK *you' in case the waiter/cashier/receptionist mishears it as the F word :teeth


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## Samtrix (Aug 22, 2011)

I walked up to the counter to take my driving test. The guy asks "written test or practical test?" I respond with "yes."

I was walking through campus and ran into two friends. One of them says "hey, what are you doing?"
"That way," while pointing in the direction I'm walking. I still claim to have misheard her.


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## hopethishelps (May 20, 2010)

Scene: Leaving for the day while other coworkers are still working. What I meant to say:

"You guys *should* go enjoy the sun!"

What I said:

"You guys *could* go enjoy the sun!"

I always splurt out the wrong words.


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## HollyB (Sep 12, 2013)

n00blar said:


> My name is Sawyer and i work at a gas station that makes us wear name tags. And something that happens just about every other day it seems is somebody will come in and say "Hey Sawyer, that's a cool name" or " I like your name". And even though it comes up so often i still have yet to find a response to it that works and doesn't seem awkward. Usually I'll just go with a long pause while trying to think of something and go"...um, Thanks..."
> I've also tried "Yea i like it too", "Yea it is pretty cool", or "Yea its not very common" and none of them ever seem to come off right and awkward silence ensues.


A lot of people will ask me if I was born around Christmas or make other christmas-related jokes, and it always goes sort of like
"Holly, that's a cute name. Do you have a Christmas birthday?"
"No."
Awkward silence awkward silence.
Or my personal favorite, when someone sings part of Holly Jolly Christmas and then there is just this moment of staring at each other before I do a nervous chuckle thing in an attempt to acknowledge their effort.


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## HollyB (Sep 12, 2013)

I was in macroeconomics class and the professor randomly called on me when I was daydreaming. No idea what he said, but I just heard my name and looked up and he and everyone in the class were just staring at me. It threw me off so my brain was like MEREREKFJIJFJ and I just go "...Macroeconomics" in this really matter-of-fact tone. The prof just kinda stared at me like wtf and moved on to someone else.


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## Wurli (Sep 15, 2012)

I was having a nerve-wracking conversation with a financial advisor at my bank and I was talking about where I lived. I accidentally said "We have no stoplights" , which would be stupid. I meant to say streetlights...


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## Anxiety Is In the Past (Aug 15, 2017)

When I'm told take care.I say me too instead of you too.


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## EarthDominator (Sep 10, 2017)

I don't know dude, I'm bored.


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## Muliosys (Aug 28, 2017)

Not too bad, the most recent one I can remember is I went into the shop by my house to buy something late in the evening, and I said "Good morning" instead of "Good evening". I actually think in that case because my sleep pattern has been off lately, so it was technically "morning" for me in the sense that I'd just gotten up. It wasn't particularly awkward though, as she knows I wasn't speaking in my first language.


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## Hussle (Mar 5, 2014)

Wurli said:


> I was having a nerve-wracking conversation with a financial advisor at my bank and I was talking about where I lived. I accidentally said "We have no stoplights" , which would be stupid. I meant to say streetlights...


I say stoplights. Don't see anything wrong with that.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk


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## Anjanonymous (Oct 14, 2017)

I called my friend who is a guy “mom” on accident. Twice.


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## pillarsofcreation (Sep 14, 2017)

Once I said 'Hello' instead of 'Thank you' when I got my order in a take-away. lol

Also, because I work in customer service, sometimes I say 'Thank you, enjoy' in weird situations. Like when I had a post man giving me some mail, he said thank you and then I said 'Thank you, enjoy!'.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

it's more like the last thing i didn't say that made things weird/awkward.

oh......i thought of something:

me being friendly to old man i'd seen before: hi, how are you?
him: nice to see you.
me: good.

i was expecting him to say "good....you" (or something like that) and had my standard answer ready.


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## roxslide (Apr 12, 2011)

Omg the other day my coworker turned around and was trying to show me something on her back and said something I didn't hear very well like, "See? Look at my... (unintelligible)."

And I stared at her backside for a while trying to see what she was showing me and after a few seconds I went, "...Okay? Tell me why I'm staring at your butt?"

Apparently she wanted me to read the back of her t-shirt lol and for some reason I went straight to her butt haha. I was super embarrassed.

--

But generally I always miss jokes or references and have to make people explain what they meant more than once until the joke is very much dead and now it's just awkward and I have to go "Oh! Ha. Ha...." after they explain it to me the second time.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Girl gave me a bead at work. She asked where I'm going to put it and I said my bed post. She goes why.....I quickly said to keep me safe lol. She said what??? Lol


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## Shy extrovert (Dec 6, 2017)

For mine it is always comparing two unrelated things and thinking people will see the correlation but they never do. Somebody mentioned feeding their cat too much can be just as bad as too little and i said oh its like the horseshoe theory (2 extremes are more alike than the mid ground)! They didnt understand and it made me feel awkward :/ 
And does not saying anything at all also count? Haha, sometimes not responding can be just as awkward. Whenever someone tells me im quiet i never respond. The one time i did i was teary eyed cause i thought i was doing so well at being more open! Its stupid but that comment still bothers me


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Yesterday I waited at the front desk at a clinic trying to pay a bill. No one was there but I could here voices in the back. I just kept waiting for someone to show instead of saying something. Eventually I spoke up twice and no one heard me.....so I kept waiting until no one showed after like 20mins.


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## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

I was fishing alone on the pier. I got acquainted with another black dude fishing alone on the pier. It was windy. We were conversing about how windy it was. I meant to say the wind keeps blowing my line back. Due to my speech impediment in socially anxious situations, I said the wind keeps blowing my line black. He gave me a weird look. Before he realized what I meant to say. He probably knew I was socially anxious. He did not mind. He went on with the conversation. I scowled on the inside after I said that. Happy my speech impediment has improved a lot over the years. It mostly went away when a lot of my social anxiety went away. My speech impediment comes back sometimes when I am around certain people that triggers my SA back. Old high school classmates or former friends that knew how I was when I was in school.


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## meep101 (Feb 11, 2018)

Someone said they were enjoying a conversation they were having with me. I said, “I agree. Ditto. I mean, what you said. I mean what you said but applied to you. Uh, if that wasn’t already obvious...” *facepalm*.

I then put my foot in it a couple of times & I think I might have inadvertently insulted them. I don’t think they were enjoying the conversation quite so much after that. It didn’t end well


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## melancholyscorpio (Aug 14, 2015)

Not really due to SA but due to me getting the day mixed up.

I brought in muffins to work and a coworker said ooh Valentine's day muffins and I'm like no Valentine's Day is over cause I thought it was the previous day.


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