# I hate starting over, I really do!



## Midnight Laces (May 5, 2012)

Okay, well, my therapist of two years is leaving for some other job. And I will meet my new therapist tomorrow morning.

I am a bit sad and nervous again.

I hate re-telling my problems and then revisiting there again. 

Any tips on how to calm down and give this another go?


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## Voyager (Jan 15, 2012)

I honestly have no idea how therapists do things over in the US, but shouldn't your previous therapist have kept some sort of journal or medical record about you and your sessions together, that you could request? I mean if you could get a hold of that or most of her notes, and give it to your next therapist you wouldn't have to go through all of the re-telling. I hope it goes well for you.


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## Midnight Laces (May 5, 2012)

Well, I met with my new therapist today and she has read all the notes, but she would still like to hear it from my own mouth.


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## Voyager (Jan 15, 2012)

Midnight Laces said:


> Well, I met with my new therapist today and she has read all the notes, but she would still like to hear it from my own mouth.


You don't have to retell it all to her if you're feeling really uncomfortable about it. Therapy is all about open communication and it's her job to take your wishes into consideration. If she has read all the notes you supplied as she said she did, then she already knows what you're struggling with and should be able to plan the course of treatment.

I understand why she wants you to describe your issues yourself, that way she makes sure what exactly you want to work on. This way lesser misunderstandings occur. But if you're feeling really torn up about it, don't retell the same old story again, she will be able to get the big picture from the notes.

Take care.


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## phreader (Mar 28, 2012)

I was thinking of starting a thread just like this one this morning. I was working with a social worker grad student this spring, but she graduated in may. I really don't want to have to explain myself another time to another counselor. I know that I felt so so much better after these sessions, but now I'm annoyed I have to start with a new person. I'm scared to start over and ask for a new counselor. I will be going through this struggle with you. You're not alone!

Maybe you could write some of your thoughts down yourself to help qualm nerves. I find out more about myself writing, than speaking...and feel a tad releived after. go figure


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## Midnight Laces (May 5, 2012)

Well, I posted something on my blog about how our session went. It didn't go so well. 

Posted a thread here. 

Anyway, she told me that if I didn't cry when I was re-telling my story, that means I'm strong. 

The only good that she has said so far.


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## Pam (Feb 14, 2009)

Midnight Laces said:


> ... Anyway, she told me that if I didn't cry when I was re-telling my story, that means I'm strong.
> 
> The only good that she has said so far.


You think that's good? I mean you can prefer not to cry, but it is not necessarily "strong" to not cry. Not crying could also mean you're dissociated or in denial or something else bad. I don't see why she said that at all. It reminds me of parents who won't let their kid cry and they have to be fake and stuff their feelings and grow up messed up. That lady is totally wrong, imo.

I was going to say tho, that when you start over with a new therapist, you may be in a more improved position when you begin the second time, so you won't necessarily have to rehash everything. You may not even need to talk about certain things at all if you've already processed them in the past therapy.


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## Midnight Laces (May 5, 2012)

^ Well, she's as great as I thought she was.

I have a Grad on Friday and I'm trying to get a ride and my case worker called me today and told me that she couldn't make it. And then she called the new therapist, Anna. 

And my case worker told me that she was being difficult, saying things like "well, can't she take a taxi?" and then it wasn't until my mom called her and Anna said that she was going to have to talk to her supervisor, so they could pay for the ride.


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## Grimnir (Jun 10, 2012)

Starting over with a new therapists can go really well or really poorly. I'm sorry your recent experience has been the latter. In my case, whenever I had to start over I was always able to predict what they were going to say. That was usually my problem when I was in therapy, so I wouldn't listen or would leave stuff out for fear of getting in trouble (them telling my parents certain things, etc.)

I hope this new therapist improves, or that you can find one that works better with you.


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