# Anyone with SA actually finish school?



## farleyknight (Oct 29, 2009)

Those of you with SA: How many of you have actually gone to college and finished? How did you do it? Do you need a large support group? Can you actually go to school for something challenging and deal with failure when you don't make the cut? I'd like to get some feedback from people who have made this journey. I'm running into a lot of issues and I want to know how people have dealt with them. Thanks..


----------



## rincewind (Sep 7, 2009)

Well, I got through university without much trouble from an academic viewpoint. I never got to know anyone during my time there, and the complete lack of a social life meant I ended up focusing on my work instead. I'd just turn up to lectures and sit by myself every day. The hardest part of it for me was actually finding ways to occupy myself in the gaps between lectures.

What sort of issues are you having?


----------



## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

I didn't finish highschool. Neither did Adam Sandler. You can still be something without a "proper" education, you just need to be creative.


----------



## toffee (Oct 5, 2009)

Yeah i did.. it wasn't easy, but it was something that had to be done..
i dropped out of college last yr. i am in college now doing a new course and i think i'll stick it out..


----------



## shadowmask (Jun 22, 2009)

I'm planning on going to college pretty soon....hope I don't let my SA get the best of me. Wasting all of that time and money certainly wouldn't be conducive to my recovery, to say the least.


----------



## veryalone (Aug 26, 2009)

I'm in med school. It can be done. Education is the most important part of my life and nothing will prevent me from attaining the highest education I could possibly want for myself. I feel that if I don't do that, then I not only let myself down but I let society down as well.


----------



## glarmph (May 21, 2009)

I went to college and got an Associates Degree, but I took every single class online.


----------



## veron (Apr 29, 2009)

What issues are you worried about? Academic or social ones?


----------



## Havalina (Dec 18, 2004)

I will be graduating in April, thank god.
It has taken me 6 years to do a 4 year degree. I'm too persistant to let a few set backs get in my way.


----------



## Banzai (Jun 4, 2009)

I completed secondary school and am now at college (UK) and very much plan to attend university (hopefully the "top" ones if I can hack the interviews...)
I think my intelligence and being near top of the school was how I dealt with failure since I made sure to do well in exams. If I ever were to be one of the "dumbest" people in a class/consistently do bad in an exam, then I would pretty much just give up altogether. Doing well/being top is the only thing that motivates me to learn. 

And no, definitely had no support group from either my school or my family.


----------



## anonymid (Oct 16, 2005)

I finished college, and got a Master's degree, too. (Then I enrolled in a PhD program, but at that point I was just way in over my head, and dropped out after a couple years.)

For me, school was always the easy part. It's the "real world" outside of school that's always been terrifying. A classroom is one of the few places where I feel (more or less) comfortable.


----------



## its_a_rick (Feb 7, 2008)

I'm in my third year of college now, so far so good. The required communication classes can be a pain though. 
In all I'm not really getting the college 'experience' on a social level, just academic bit which is the bit that matters I guess.
I can relate to what rincewind said, hardest time is time/breaks between classes, can't really do much besides go sit somewhere and that can make me real self conscious.


----------



## farleyknight (Oct 29, 2009)

Banzai said:


> I completed secondary school and am now at college (UK) and very much plan to attend university (hopefully the "top" ones if I can hack the interviews...)
> I think my intelligence and being near top of the school was how I dealt with failure since I made sure to do well in exams. If I ever were to be one of the "dumbest" people in a class/consistently do bad in an exam, then I would pretty much just give up altogether. Doing well/being top is the only thing that motivates me to learn.
> 
> And no, definitely had no support group from either my school or my family.


This is almost exactly how I feel.. If I don't do well, it's almost not even worth going..

The problem I'm having is that I've run into a lot of instructors who like to set really high standards. I'm okay with that, but I'd like to at least have some idea as to how to do well in those situations, since the standards may or may not be related to what's in the text book or other classes.

So when I don't make the cut, I start wondering where I went wrong. I think where I go wrong is that I don't always care about the subject and I don't make a genuine attempt to see the broader picture. Sometimes I avoid the tricky problems because they don't seem that rewarding..

I think I'm going to take the next year off of school so I can improve my problem solving skills in those areas that I'm weak on. I see that the students who do better than me are those students who have studied the subject before or who have a lot of experience solving problems in general.

Also I think if I could at least have a friendly relationship with my instructors then I could ask them trivial questions and they won't be entirely annoyed.


----------



## rincewind (Sep 7, 2009)

farleyknight said:


> Also I think if I could at least have a friendly relationship with my instructors then I could ask them trivial questions and they won't be entirely annoyed.


Your instructors should be more than willing to answer questions, even trivial ones - that's what they are paid to do! If you're uncomfortable asking them in person, just email them instead. If anything they'll probably appreciate that you're making an effort to learn as compared to someone who doesn't ask questions and ends up failing


----------



## farleyknight (Oct 29, 2009)

rincewind said:


> Your instructors should be more than willing to answer questions, even trivial ones - that's what they are paid to do! If you're uncomfortable asking them in person, just email them instead. If anything they'll probably appreciate that you're making an effort to learn as compared to someone who doesn't ask questions and ends up failing


Perhaps if my instructors liked teaching this would be true.. Some of the ones I have met, and am implicitly refering to, don't like most students because most students don't have an appreciation for the subject being taught. During a lecture, a less intelligent classmate of mine asked something that was relatively trivial but still not quite clear. The teacher began to answer but seemed very annoyed by his question and basically ended by saying "See me after class". So while asking shows some initiative, in some cases it appears the student is not putting forward the effort to understand the material.


----------



## DitzyDreamer (Jun 10, 2008)

Well, the only thing I've "finished" is high school and that was a lot of work on its own. I'm now a first-year in college, and socially speaking, the anxiety has been raised up a knotch. I wish my parents had let me taken a year or two off to really think about something like college, but I was kind of force into it.


----------



## anonymous2 (Oct 31, 2009)

im in grade 12. and honestly my social anxiety is the worst. my parents aren't understanding so it's not like i can just quit high school. but i just live by the moment. i've been through some pretty bad experiences nobody should ever have to go through. for instance, a few days back i had a panic attack in front of my whole class while giving an oral presentation. and i don't ever do my oral presentations and take the zero for the test grade. i walk the hallways so paronoid, thinkinge EVERYONE is starring and talking about me. i just can't wait for the day i am high school FREE  you're not alone in your SA. and thank god for this site for support!


----------



## JFmtl (Dec 23, 2008)

I'm not really finished yet with school, but I still manage to get my Bachelor degree (in accounting) I'm doing my MBA, not sure I'll get it done though, my motivation is very low. There was a lot of oral presentations to do lately, but I managed to survive, and apparently, I got better at those.


----------



## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

I have my B.A, I didn't find it that hard at all other than the oral presentations. the only thing that was really difficult was the constant due dates hanging over my head, four years later I still have nightmares about essays I forgot to hand it. overall I did pretty ok academically and socially but I didn't make any lasting friendships.


----------



## EagerMinnow84 (Sep 1, 2007)

I got a B.A. a couple of years ago. I was terribly anxious around people the entire time. I talked to some people but I always felt inferior.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

got a b.s. and an associate's. school was a good experience for me.


----------



## TATA (Sep 18, 2008)

Finished associates, working on my bachelors (a bit more than half way done), going for masters (every week presentations gotta do there). Freaks me out, but I'm getting used to it. Almost in each class I have to do a presentation once per semester. The more I accomplish, the stronger I feel... so will see how masters will work out...


----------



## Kelly065 (Aug 25, 2009)

Finshed highschool and finished a year in college (all i needed was a year to get my esthetician license)


----------



## jinxu (Jul 2, 2009)

I graduated from college this year. I had dropped out for two years due to my SA. It can be done. What I recommend is to get treatment as soon as you can because it'll make school much more bearable if yo do.


----------



## Lovesick Loner (Oct 19, 2009)

farleyknight said:


> Those of you with SA: How many of you have actually gone to college and finished? How did you do it? Do you need a large support group? Can you actually go to school for something challenging and deal with failure when you don't make the cut? I'd like to get some feedback from people who have made this journey. I'm running into a lot of issues and I want to know how people have dealt with them. Thanks..


I got my B.A. even though college life was complete torture with my SA. The social challenges turned out to be much harder than the academics. The academics were the easy part. I just forced my way through it because I knew I had to finish what I started. I never found a silver bullet for managing the stress.


----------



## JMX (Feb 26, 2008)

6 months from graduating college ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


----------



## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

Almost! I'll be done in May, and in June I'll get to graduate in the building where they shot the math olympics in _Mean Girls_. I suppose that makes it all worthwhile.


----------



## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

I'm behind a year, but I am still perservering. Academics is the hard part for me and the social withdrawal is difficult as well. I envy those who found the academics easy. 

Two more years til I finish my Bachelor's degree if I can get accepted into the professional years of my course.


----------



## bunnie (Oct 15, 2007)

I did. It was very difficult and it took longer than normal, but its over. It definitely helps to have a support group/be surrounded by nice people because it makes it easier to attend classes. 

The isolation became so unbearable that I began skipping class frequently. I think that's why it took me so long to graduate. Besides changing my major a gazillion times, I also dropped classes that required presentations, heavy class participation, etc. Damn, I hated school.

The only reason why I stuck it out was to not piss of my mom and to have job security, BUT it's been 2yrs since I finished and still no career.....so maybe I should have quit. LOL


----------



## Miss Meggie (Nov 19, 2009)

I've got 6 months left until I graduate. For about a month after my boyfriend and best friend graduated and left me alone, I said every day that I was going to pack up my stuff, call my father, and have him come pick me up. I was miserable, alone, nervous, and just felt like giving up.
After going to a counsellor here on campus I realised that I want to graduate, I want to finish college. (This is my fourth college...) And I especially want to finish here because this is what I *really* want to do. It's my passion, and without a degree, although I could make it (I'm a culinary student) without a degree, my future employers would look at my resume and see that I didn't finish my last 6 months. They don't really care if you *almost* graduate.
So I'm sticking it out. I'm even considering joining some clubs; I want to work in culinary publication after I graduate, so I'm planning on joining the school newspaper. There are a few clubs that I think I'll at least go to a meeting or two to see how I like it...


----------



## HTF (Nov 15, 2009)

Just started looking into starting some time of schooling.


----------



## contranigma (Jun 24, 2009)

I should graduate college in may. Grades aren't too much of an issue to me. I'm doing a general science degree. I think it would be a lot harder for me to do something like medicine or engineering, but that is less because of SA and more because I wouldn't have the motivation or desire to do those things.


----------



## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

I graduated almost 11 years ago with a B.S. in Computer Science. It can be done.
I did pick a field with a lot of shy people, though. :stu


----------



## travisjsmith (Nov 23, 2009)

I finished high school but I'm still struggling with what course I want to complete because I've deferred twice now from the same course. I'm not sure if I want to go back to University or go work full time.


----------



## supersoshychick (Jun 4, 2009)

I'm in my first year technically. It's pretty hard, some times i just wanna drop out of college, i can't even concentrate on my work sometimes, i just sit there worrying about other things in my life, or what other people are thinking of me,so when the class is over, i remember hardly anything the teacher said. My anxiety is getting worse, even though i have surrounded myself around tons of people this year, it's not helping  

When someone is talking to me, and i have to look them straight in the eye too....omg i just want to shrink to the floor when that happens. I HATE THIS!


----------



## bbarn (Dec 22, 2007)

i graduated last year june in biology at university but since the economy was tough atm, getting a little better now, i will be going back to school to specialize working in the bio lab


----------



## rasberrykiwi (Mar 21, 2009)

I graduated cegep two years ago, thanks to a lot of help and encouragement from my school counsellor, my teachers, and a special needs program there. I'm really so grateful to all of them. Otherwise, I never would have made it, I had such bad anxiety I had trouble going to class and doing my work. I really hope to attend university one day. But so far..i'm holding myself back. I'm scared of being disappointed I guess, and realizing that with my anxious character, I'm not capable of pursuing the careers i'm interested in.


----------



## Eraserhead (Sep 23, 2006)

The only thing standing between me and graduation is one exam, which I'm taking in two weeks. I think my official graduation will be in February.


----------



## JFmtl (Dec 23, 2008)

Eraserhead said:


> The only thing standing between me and graduation is one exam, which I'm taking in two weeks. I think my official graduation will be in February.


Good luck on that exam, get an 100%!!!!


----------

