# The 3 levels of Social Anxiety



## paulyD (Feb 16, 2011)

There are 3 levels of Social Anxiety :

1) Procrastination/escaping reality

2) Depression

3) Social Anxiety

Everybody who suffers from social anxiety is different. Some people will have all 3 levels of social anxiety whilst others may only suffer from social anxiety itself as opposed to level 1 & 2 also. Some people will have really extreme and generalized social anxiety whilst others will only have mild social anxiety

*Procrastination/escaping reality*

A lot of people with social anxiey also suffer really badly from procrastination/escaping reality. These people can seem to be extremely lazy.

They struggle to get out of bed in the morning, they always put things off and they can never seem to get anything done or achieve anything. They live in their own little world and they usually spend most of their life doing everything that they can to escape reality. they usually achieve this by excessive tv watching or video game playing/internet surfing or by abusing substances such as alchohol, drugs and junk food

[*B]Depression[/B*

In most cases social anxiety usually goes hand in hand with depression.

Living like a hermit/recluse, being a loner, avoiding other people, not having close friendships, not having a relationship with the opposite sex or having a sex life can make a person really depressed.

also the physical exsaution of having anxiety triggered in you all day long by social anxiety can be extremely draining physical which also effects your mood. Not to mention the feelings of shame and low self worth that also come from having social anxiety.

*Social Anxiety *

In most cases Social Anxiety itself is not the only problem.

Being afraid of other people and social situations. Avoiding things, feeling self conscious etc.... is usually not the only thing that a social anxiety sufferer has to deal with

*Overcoming Social Anxiey*

To overcome social anxiety you need to tackle each issue seperately one at a time

It is best to try to overcome your procrastination/escaping reality first.

After that tackle your depression

Once you no longer have an issue with procrastination/escaping reality or depression you will be in the best position possible to overcome your social anxiety.

But without first tackling those 2 issues you will find it almost impossible to overcome social anxiety


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## tobi08 (Dec 29, 2008)

nice to read again from you. 
how can you first cure depression when you still have social anxiety? What methods do you recommend for curing depression?

in my case i have deep depression/hopelessness and despair because i cant function in daily life and i struggle with the easiest things all because my parents where treating me like i have no right to be.
Despite that i also have a lot clumsiness and tension in my body and face which frustrates me really.
And i often talk before thinking which makes my sentences make no sense sometimes. Im not that shy, i just talk but its boring. I feel like a human failure to be honest.

what i found is in my case i have no interests because i do not feel connected or involved with my senses and my own tastes etc. and i lose interesst in things very quickly. i wonder if thats common with sa sufferers. 
i have so much tension in my body that i often have difficult to breathe. this all adds to the depression.


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## paulyD (Feb 16, 2011)

tobi08 said:


> nice to read again from you.
> how can you first cure depression when you still have social anxiety? What methods do you recommend for curing depression?
> 
> in my case i have deep depression/hopelessness and despair because i cant function in daily life and i struggle with the easiest things all because my parents where treating me like i have no right to be.
> ...


overcoming depression is something that im going to look into more deeply as I'm not an expert on it

I'm prety much an expert on overcoming procrastination and social anxiety but as for the depression it is something that i need o study more 
what i have learnt so far though is that all of the following will help to lift depression :

*follow a healthy diet
*exercise dailly 
*use st johns wort
*use batch remedies (there are a few remedies specifically for depression)
*laugh for 20 minutes everyday (e.g watch a tv comedy show)
*keep as busy and active as posible 
*spend time outdoors 
*spend time with other people as much as possible (i know this one is hard if you have social anxiety )
*do what you love and love what you do


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## Suzanneshep (Nov 3, 2014)

paulyD said:


> There are 3 levels of Social Anxiety :
> 
> 1) Procrastination/escaping reality
> 
> ...


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## Suzanneshep (Nov 3, 2014)

All three are what I'm going through right now. At least I'm not alone to know that others go through this as well. It's tough to explain to people as I why I'm starting therapy. I'm tired of the loneliness and avoiding people. Thanks for the post.


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## paulyD (Feb 16, 2011)

Suzanneshep said:


> All three are what I'm going through right now. At least I'm not alone to know that others go through this as well. It's tough to explain to people as I why I'm starting therapy. I'm tired of the loneliness and avoiding people. Thanks for the post.


you are most definately not alone. There are so many people out there who are suffering from social anxiety and most of them have all of the above 3 problems.

overcoming these problems is pretty simple if you know how to do it. through trial and error and years of experience I have learnt exactly how to do it. it's all about first breaking it down into chuncks and then steps, and taking it one step at a time

any advice you need on how to overcome the above 3 problems just ask. i am more than willing to help


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## xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (Nov 10, 2014)

Wow, I never thought of procrastination as being related to social anxiety, but it really does make sense..I'm a senior in college and I find myself putting everything off until the last minute and then I get way overwhelmed with schoolwork. I feel like I just wanna sleep all the time. I'm seriously a horrible student and sometimes I feel like theres no way I'll ever get to where I wanna be, which just makes me feel like a failure..and thats pretty depressing and makes anxiety way worse...


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## sprawl (Apr 20, 2014)

This is pretty spot on. I've realized that I tend to "escape" a lot through daydreaming/internet surfing, music, etc. It used to be stuff like video games and shows, but now it seems I can't even get myself to do those things. I'm trying to accept my reality because that's the only way I'll ever change.


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## ilsr (Aug 29, 2010)

OP, did you come up with those three levels by yourself, or are they from other sources? 
I'm pretty much stuck with all three. There was a time where I had much less depression, but I still didn't have the energy after work hours to work on what I wanted to accomplish. In fact, I don't feel I've every accomplished what I dreamed about doing since I was a teen, instead very little such that I have suicidal thoughts often these days at least once a week. Not thinking about how to do it specifically...yet. But tired of all aspects of life since it's too late and I'm and old failure.


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## paulyD (Feb 16, 2011)

ap12 said:


> Wow, I never thought of procrastination as being related to social anxiety, but it really does make sense..I'm a senior in college and I find myself putting everything off until the last minute and then I get way overwhelmed with schoolwork. I feel like I just wanna sleep all the time. I'm seriously a horrible student and sometimes I feel like theres no way I'll ever get to where I wanna be, which just makes me feel like a failure..and thats pretty depressing and makes anxiety way worse...


the root of procrastination is - fear of judgement and criticism

at the root of social phobia is - fear of judgement and criticism

Therefore it makes perfect sense why a social phobic would also suffer from procrastination


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## paulyD (Feb 16, 2011)

ils25r said:


> OP, did you come up with those three levels by yourself, or are they from other sources?
> I'm pretty much stuck with all three. There was a time where I had much less depression, but I still didn't have the energy after work hours to work on what I wanted to accomplish. In fact, I don't feel I've every accomplished what I dreamed about doing since I was a teen, instead very little such that I have suicidal thoughts often these days at least once a week. Not thinking about how to do it specifically...yet. But tired of all aspects of life since it's too late and I'm and old failure.


yes I came up with them myself. It is what I've learnt over the years from experience and my own issues with social phobia

can I ask how old you are ?

I had a lot of dreams when i was younger, dreams that I beleived were a forgone conclusion to come true. unfortunately though due to social phobia/procrastination those dreams never materilised.

I eventually reached an age were i beleived it was too late and that i was old. this made me go from feeling depressed to actually feeling suicidal. I was in a very dark place for a very long time

I have managed to gradually pull myself out of that dark place though so maybe i could help you ?


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## ilsr (Aug 29, 2010)

paulyD said:


> yes I came up with them myself. It is what I've learnt over the years from experience and my own issues with social phobia
> 
> can I ask how old you are ?
> 
> ...


I'm 42. I've had a failed ultimately dead-end career. I appreciate the offer, but I prefer to work on it myself for now. Your list of ideas on depression looks helpful thanks. I realize now I need to keep busy working on my goals. Yes, I agree it's all about fighting on despite judgement and criticism practically every day. And also people close who are not supportive about any progress at all, but still working on it despite those who just want to tear you down anyways.


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## tobi08 (Dec 29, 2008)

on the perspective of the soul age doesnt matter. 
There is no beginning and no end. You have plenty of time to resolve your issues. You have been reborn multiple times and carried the issues from previous lifes into this one because your soul hasnt released it yet. If you are not freeing yourself in this life than in the next life.
From a human perspective this makes no sense, because we want to be free now right? 
Ive got this idea not from a book, but from a guy who recovered from severe depression and social anxiety. So i trust him 100 %

i was feeling down a lot in the last year feeling like im wasting my life and getting older. I feel quite old i get 26 on sunday. I felt i dont have much time left and i act unappropiatly for my age. But now i have shifted my perspective to the soul and im also reading a book about it called "your souls gift" by robert schwartz its very good. Our soul gives us challenges in the human life so we can evolve as a soul. Your biggest faults and weaknesses are in fact the catalysts for becoming the opposite.
In the book i suggested is also a chapter about suicide but im not that far in it yet.


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