# It's hard to start over for a weirdo



## Doraemun (Sep 9, 2016)

I'm a loser of this life. 27 years old but still like a teenager without any experiences. I went to university and then after 3 years I dropped out. 2 years laters I went back to finish because my family complain too much why I'm still not graduated. Finally after 7 years I can graduated to get that insane degree. You know, while I was going to school, I'm really shy, scared of crowd, scared of giving a lecture or standing in front of many people. And I can't make friend with anyone. I feel isolated and so lonely. I decided to get out of school and hide away from poeple, use my parents' money for living, to survive for days... (I live far away from them, in a big city). I got some manual jobs but still can't afford every bills. And no experiences can get from it. Every jobs I only work for a month and then I quit, I don't know how to work with people and not to make it weirdly. I started freaking out of this life, thinking how can I get a job to survive, to exist for the rest of my life. And by a chance, a really new kind of job comes to the town I'm living, a driver using application on the phone instead of traditional way. It's like Uber. You know. And then I became a driver/deliverer with the work time I choose by myself. I didn't know that I can become like this, but now, it's been 2 years I'm still doing this job and now I'm only thinking of it that I can do. I don't have to socialize much, I have income to pay bills, buy my own thing. But my family and the others don't think it is a steady job, a job for a person that got a degree, took 7 years to graduated and wasted a lot of money for it. I know I should be a officer or some kind of job that it is professional, have opportunity advancement, high salary, brainstorming.... But nobody knows what was wrong with me, what I've been through, what I'm dealing with. I lost inside, I hurt myself many times and thinking not to live anymore. I can't find a way for myself to live again like a normal person, have friends and social life, working professionally at a office... I don't know what to do and now I'm 27, I'm getting old and have no experiences until now. Every time, people talks about my job, I feel so depressed again and freak out. I tried search jobs on google but all are just fears. Of course, I want to be a grown-up man, have a steady job but I think it 's too late for me. I so tired and I just want to disappear. Living in this life is just all the sadness, even I have a lot of money...


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## HellCell (Jul 8, 2014)

Those experiences are similar to mine. I've habitually been unable to hold a job, I've always ran into a deal breaker in all the jobs I've ever had.
I've thought about the Uber driver gig, but there are things about it that worries me.

Do you worry about not socializing and getting a bad review because of it?
I don't have driving experience except for commutes to work and grocery stores. I'm worried I'll be navigating badly on unknown roads.
I heard stories of having to drive drunk people around and them puking in your car. I wouldn't know how to handle that.
I don't have a perfect driving record, it's been more than 5 years, but I've been in car accidents due to my own fault.

Can you tell me if Uber is as bad as I'm making it out to be?


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## versikk (Nov 25, 2013)

So like... Regarding the job itself, all jobs need to be done by someone, so I wouldn't look down on myself for having a job. That said, I defi can understand your feelings, since you basically aren't living the life you imagined you'd have....which is true for most people, weirdos and normies alike.

I also dropped out of uni but never finished; working a job I enjoy somewhat but didn't exactly "choose" since I also had "higher" hopes about my future, blah.

But life is what it is and I wonder - do you feel fundamentally unhappy with your career? Or just feel like you "could and should do better"?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Doraemun (Sep 9, 2016)

HellCell said:


> Those experiences are similar to mine. I've habitually been unable to hold a job, I've always ran into a deal breaker in all the jobs I've ever had.
> I've thought about the Uber driver gig, but there are things about it that worries me.
> 
> Do you worry about not socializing and getting a bad review because of it?
> ...


How many jobs have you tried? It's so sad for me that I know nothing but only driving. I live in South Asia, the country still has a lot of motorbikes and I still don't have a chance to drive a car. But I can say, I did drive a drunk guy, some different kind of people, sometimes it's a bit dangerous but I can avoid it, choose rides just around the center, near crowded areas, and not driving at midnight... With some drunk or bad people, there once I dropped him in the middle of the way because of his bad behavior. I refused to drive him and drive away. 
When I apply to Uber, they just require a police record, some kind of that, not a driving record, it's easy. And when I drive people, I don't speak much, all the way driving I just pretend them like some kind of goods. And I really worry about not socializing. I'm scared of what my neighbors and relatives gonna talk about me, criticize me that I'm a loser... And sometimes I also lost my language ability, I forget a lot of words to say and can't speak fluently, that can lead to Alzheimer's disease.
To be a driver, you will see a lot of different kind of people and you can have a chance to know something new, but that your choice to be friendly or not. There some bad guys but there are always good and normal people.And it's not that really makes you worry about.
Have you ever think this taxi driver job is a bad job just for idle, uneducated guys?


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## Doraemun (Sep 9, 2016)

versikk said:


> So like... Regarding the job itself, all jobs need to be done by someone, so I wouldn't look down on myself for having a job. That said, I defi can understand your feelings, since you basically aren't living the life you imagined you'd have....which is true for most people, weirdos and normies alike.
> 
> I also dropped out of uni but never finished; working a job I enjoy somewhat but didn't exactly "choose" since I also had "higher" hopes about my future, blah.
> 
> ...


I can say "future" or "career" is not the word for me. This job has none of that. But it helps me for living. I don't like it but I'll be ok if people around me don't judge me because of that job. That makes me unhappy. I'm scared of people and I hate the fact that I am hunan being. I should be a cat and I'm still learning English to communicate with human around the world...


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## versikk (Nov 25, 2013)

Doraemun said:


> I can say "future" or "career" is not the word for me. This job has none of that. But it helps me for living. I don't like it but I'll be ok if people around me don't judge me because of that job. That makes me unhappy. I'm scared of people and I hate the fact that I am hunan being. I should be a cat and I'm still learning English to communicate with human around the world...


are you otherkin?


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## HellCell (Jul 8, 2014)

Doraemun said:


> How many jobs have you tried? It's so sad for me that I know nothing but only driving. I live in South Asia, the country still has a lot of motorbikes and I still don't have a chance to drive a car. But I can say, I did drive a drunk guy, some different kind of people, sometimes it's a bit dangerous but I can avoid it, choose rides just around the center, near crowded areas, and not driving at midnight... With some drunk or bad people, there once I dropped him in the middle of the way because of his bad behavior. I refused to drive him and drive away.
> When I apply to Uber, they just require a police record, some kind of that, not a driving record, it's easy. And when I drive people, I don't speak much, all the way driving I just pretend them like some kind of goods. And I really worry about not socializing. I'm scared of what my neighbors and relatives gonna talk about me, criticize me that I'm a loser... And sometimes I also lost my language ability, I forget a lot of words to say and can't speak fluently, that can lead to Alzheimer's disease.
> To be a driver, you will see a lot of different kind of people and you can have a chance to know something new, but that your choice to be friendly or not. There some bad guys but there are always good and normal people.And it's not that really makes you worry about.
> Have you ever think this taxi driver job is a bad job just for idle, uneducated guys?


I tried and left 5 jobs and like 3 jobs that I didn't even stay for 2 weeks. Some of those jobs I can't even bother putting on my resume because I left so quick. It would be look 10x better if I had 1 or 2 jobs on my resume that I stayed at for years, including uber.
Maybe it's different in south Asia, but where I'm from people are *******s when it comes to customer service. They feel like their time is too precious to waste and hate delays even for a second. It's nice to know that the requirements for uber is quite lax. I'll highly put it into consideration. Worst that can happen is if people think I'm a slow, incompetent driver and I get fired right?


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## VirtousD (Apr 2, 2017)

I'm a similar age about to be 26 in days; as for a social life i honestly feel there's a point of no return (usually after your done with education) at this point all my peers will have a well established social circle with people they've known for years and have little intention to add anyone new to it unless there some serious gain. 

Making friends when you currently have next to none as an adult is a kin to trying to enter the job market with no experience; need experience to get a job but need a job to get experience. In other words unless a miracle happens it's gonna be very hard to make friends without having any purely because there's a severe limit to places/events you can attend on your own without looking like a creep so your kind of forced to stay home unless you have to i.e for work. 
Then there's the risk if you do meet people them realising you have very little going on in your life and getting bored of hanging out.


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## versikk (Nov 25, 2013)

VirtousD said:


> there's a severe limit to places/events you can attend on your own without looking like a creep so your kind of forced to stay home unless you have to i.e for work.





> Then there's the risk if you do meet people them realising you have very little going on in your life and getting bored of hanging out..


These 2 phrases are quite poignant... especially the part about "looking like a creep". i guess friendlessness gives off certain vibes or something?


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## SociopathicApe (May 17, 2017)

I'm pretty much in the same place in my life. I tried going to a community college for a few years, but I became too depressed to do any of the work, so I started failing more and more classes until I finally dropped out. Now, I'm working a part time job at a PetSmart that'll go nowhere for me because you need to be active and outgoing to rise in the career world (I obviously have neither traits). I'm turning 27 this year, and I'm still depending on my parents, don't have a driver's license, no social life, no partner, and no longer know what career I qualify for. We really do emotionally stunt ourselves at the worst times!


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## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

Yup,I've worked in the delivery business in various capacities both full & part time gigs for 15 years, but if I had a sparkly expensive education I'd like to think I'd be something better :lol


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## TheForestWasDark (May 23, 2015)

i know, im hoping to be a hospital tech who cleans off all the blood and guts off medical instruments soon. Maybe this will help portray me as more of a weirdo to the general populace but at least i will be making bank and working alone a lot of the time. The course is hands on to so no fancy ape bs is required.


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## versikk (Nov 25, 2013)

bricky1 said:


> i know, im hoping to be a hospital tech who cleans off all the blood and guts off medical instruments soon. Maybe this will help portray me as more of a weirdo to the general populace but at least i will be making bank and working alone a lot of the time. The course is hands on to so no fancy ape bs is required.


ooh i like that


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## TheForestWasDark (May 23, 2015)

versikk said:


> ooh i like that


it looks rad honestly. My mom was like "ooh so you wanna be a janitor eh" and my aunt be like "you don't have to do that forever ya know.. " i be like "its a dreamjob"


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## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

It's even harder to start over if you never started in the first place.


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## Hopeful12 (Apr 11, 2019)

WillYouStopDave said:


> It's even harder to start over if you never started in the first place.


What do you mean?


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## versikk (Nov 25, 2013)

bricky1 said:


> versikk said:
> 
> 
> > ooh i like that
> ...


I wanted to be a coroner when I was a younger or doing autopsies. This job you're mentioning sounds like a decent alternative to that, possible more comfortable, especially if it nets disposable income. &#128515;


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## Doraemun (Sep 9, 2016)

So I want to know, at your place, being a taxi, truck/driver or deliverer is a real job, what do people around you think about it? Do they respect this job? My family don't accept it but I only know this job that I can live comfortably.


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## jtd1974 (Jan 13, 2015)

I applied for a job as a mortuary attendant a while back lol. 

Lack of experience in a medical/hospital environment meant I didn't get to the interview stage.

There is a course you can do here, mortuary science I think it's called.

I know it sounds grim, but something about it interests me. I'm sure you'd get used to it all after a while, like any job.


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## railcar82594 (Mar 1, 2016)

It may be in south asia, that being uber driver does well enough to make a living. You are probably better off than in the U.S. where it's tough to make it independently single even with an uber job especially in high-cost of living cities and states, and many with college degrees are forced to be underemployed. So while your parents may have high expectations they probably don't realize you are doing relatively well compared to many places in the world and I don't think SAD affliction should not be blamed for probably negatively affecting career progress. 27 is still fairly young, as you don't really start creaking until past mid-thirties imo. As for driver jobs, truck driving is fairly common in the U.S., not a white collar job, but still counted as a "real" job.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

HellCell said:


> Those experiences are similar to mine. I've habitually been unable to hold a job, I've always ran into a deal breaker in all the jobs I've ever had.
> I've thought about the Uber driver gig, but there are things about it that worries me.
> 
> Do you worry about not socializing and getting a bad review because of it?
> ...


I'm sure every place you work in is different. I don't carry passengers, I just do deliveries. It can pay well if you know how to strategize.

The customers and restaurant staff never try to talk to me. People usually just want their stuff and for you to get off their property asap.

The constant driving can be exhausting though, and your car will need an oil change and new brakes often.


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## JEG88 (May 14, 2019)

All of my jobs have been in an office environment. It's been a struggle even to today to socialize and feel like I can see myself in a job long term.


I haven't been at any job longer than 2 years, and I think the major reason is I feel like I let my SA and lack of self-confidence limit me. Limit me from progressing and networking with colleagues, build relationships to learn new skills and functions or just to get into someone's good graces for development opportunities or a promotion.


I feel like I let my SA drive me to be the quiet guy who doesn't talk or socialize at the office, which is death in terms of long-term development or career paths. But I also try to tell myself that it's never to late to be more social, or to at least keep trying.


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## DukeDuck (Jul 27, 2016)

What was your area of study? There are lots of jobs out there that don't involve socializing. But its important that you're good at it. Start by asking yourself what your interests are, and then proceed from there.


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