# Is it possible to fall in love on the internet?



## girlyone1 (Jan 20, 2012)

.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Absolutely


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## andy0128 (Dec 19, 2003)

I don't think you can be in love until you've met someone in real life, as nice as it is that he gives you happiness.


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

how is the verb FALL ever related to this??
:O
or IN???

any random scattered prepositions...

2w3ert6y7u8i90-asdfrtgyhuiop[sdfghjkl;zxcvbnm,.

_this is_ human language. all above and below such phrase illegal wrapping itself in redundant wraparound: every introductory used by all! TV presenter! for the blind.

minds severely limited + truncated

THE!!! THE!!! THE!!! THE!!! THE!!! THE!!! THE!!! THE!!! THE!!! THE!!!

IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!! IT!!!


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## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

Sure it is.


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## girlyone1 (Jan 20, 2012)

twitchy666 said:


> how is the verb FALL ever related to this??
> /forum/images/SAS_2015/smilies/tango_face_surprise.png
> or IN???
> 
> ...


Ok so.....do you think its possible to fall in love with someone online or not?


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Yes.


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## ShadowOne (Jun 27, 2016)

yes and no. your feelings are real and valid, but I think there's a level of disconnect and maybe protection from just being an online relationship. Body language and being in eachother's presence just seems more tried and tested er something. Maybe I'm projecting, but if I only talked to someone online, even for months and months, i'd be nervous af meeting the first time in person. But if you've been around someone in person that long, i wouldnt have that nervousness

i dunno if that makes sense..


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## Lohikaarme (Aug 28, 2013)

Yes


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Yeh. Being in love isn't a "true or not" proposition, its feelings. You might not know that person as well as you think you do, but that applies perfectly well offline too (take my recent ex best friend who was almost living a double life for 8 years, his gf didn't know him _at all_).

It's like, say you see someone posting on here, you like their posts, you know them 10%. You see their pics, 17%, you text chat for a month, 40%, vid chat for 6 70%, live together for 5 years 85%. (randomly guessing %'s).

At any point in this can you have strong feelings for someone. The question is, are you in love with that person, or in love with the person your mind has generated? (this is unavoidable to some degree).


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## SofaKing (May 9, 2014)

You can develop a lot of feelings, yes, but nothing can substitute for in-person chemistry. 

Definitely make plans to meet to see if everything you imagine will work in full reality.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

I guess it depends on how you define love but I guess so.


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## Mondo_Fernando (Jun 26, 2014)

Maybe like his personality online, but offline some people can be different.


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## Nick Attwell (Jun 16, 2014)

Girly0ne1

'course you can fall in love online & have a relationship together (as much as you can online)

If you decide to meet each other real world, then you need to cam up so you both can see that each of you are genuine & chat on the phone

The golden number 1 rule of the internet is what's online stays online (unless you can be sure of each other)

As for meeting real world, both of you meet with a friend

You may think I'm being over cautious Girlyone1, but it's better to be safe than raped/dead

I am sure from what you say Girlyone1, he is genuine; as are you. But please play safe; take a friend & make sure he does too

But back to your question Girlyone1:

Yes; I met my partner online

I was forced into a corner with no option other than to pick her up & home with me

We have been partner's ever since

Why I picked her up & brought her home, re. my post signature


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## Quietguy86 (Aug 12, 2018)

You should always be careful though about who you're chatting to online, have you seen this guys picture? Be pro active, pay attention to inconsistencies in what someone you're chatting to online says, look for red flags, I mean its not impossible to develop feelings for someone, I know from personal experience cause I met my great love well now my ex online. 

I met her here actually, but we eventually met in real life, yeah I'm kind of an old member but lets just say its been a long time since I've been here. But falling in love, right now you only know his online personality, he may be completely different in real life. 

Some people fall in love with the idea of being in love, I'm not a psychiatrist so I won't say anything beyond this but there is a big difference between thinking you're in love and actually being in love, How long have you known this guy? 

Love is living with someone, seeing all their bad habits etc and still wanting to be with them, Love is seeing this persons flaws, you're seeing the online stuff, love makes mistakes, love is a roller coaster ride, its fast and furious, love is wanting for others what you would wish for yourself, happiness, fulfillment. 

Yes you can meet someone online and you can certainly feel a crush but Love, before you can be in love you need to meet this person and keep your options open, if you're meant to be with this guy you will. 

Just be vigilant and take care you don't get trapped in any spider webs


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## CNikki (Aug 9, 2013)

Make sure you know who you're really talking to before jumping into anything. People can portray themselves however they want you to perceive them as and there's more room for that anomaly online than in real life (unless you're a really smart con artist.)


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## KILOBRAVO (Sep 17, 2011)

yes. especially if there is frequent talking and skyping, sending pics, sending virtual greetings cards, etc, etc and all that. It all starts out to be very exotic and exciting. Its all you think about.

Its also VERY easy for them to turn out to be a rotten, selfish, manipulative, unfaithful, waste of time promising everything but delivering [in the end] nothing but breaking yoru heart and wasting your time. They are on the other side of a computer and phone line remember.

Can you see ALL that they are doing and ALL that they are communicating with? Do they turn out to be on about 8 different dating sites and skyping, e-mailing, and contacting and planning other things with other people while keeping all this from you but telling you that they are "waiting for you and only you"? No.

It went on for 3 years. Yes, you read that right. And i never ever thought that the negative stuff would come such was the dream it was in the beginning. I mean, i was foolish enough to believe that she was as faithful and devoted and commited as i was but that's what you beleive. I was wrong, but it took three years to finally find that out once and for all and get rid of her. I have never felt more free because it began to feel like an emotional prison; you thought you loved them, you didn't want to lose them, the distance tha twas between you somehow made the connection feel vulnerable so you tried all the harder to maintain it, but they were hurting you all same time. constant nagging doubts in the back of yoru head about what scheme they were up to this time.

just pre-warning you, @girlyone1. It could be too good to be true no matter how exciting you find this person and the excitement of connecting with someone.

But then you have to hope the person you are communicating to is honest and faithful and committed to you. They can't all be liars. let's hope he is genuine and properly properly faithful and committed and honest. you and he needs to be 150% devoted, otherwise it'll peter out.

id never be desperate enough to trust anyone over the internet again especially if its overseas. Long distance is not very good at all, even though it lasted 3 years.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

It's 1 dimensional. I've had relationships with people that were pretty different online vs off



BeardedMessiahBob said:


> Yeh. Being in love isn't a "true or not" proposition, its feelings. You might not know that person as well as you think you do, but that applies perfectly well offline too (take my recent ex best friend who was almost living a double life for 8 years, his gf didn't know him _at all_).
> 
> It's like, say you see someone posting on here, you like their posts, you know them 10%. You see their pics, 17%, you text chat for a month, 40%, vid chat for 6 70%, live together for 5 years 85%. (randomly guessing %'s).
> 
> At any point in this can you have strong feelings for someone. The question is, are you in love with that person, or in love with the person your mind has generated? (this is unavoidable to some degree).


Sometimes you can chat to someone for years online and still only know them 10% lol.


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## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

KILOBRAVO said:


> Can you see ALL that they are doing and ALL that they are communicating with? Do they turn out to be on about 8 different dating sites and skyping, e-mailing, and contacting and planning other things with other people while keeping all this from you but telling you that they are "waiting for you and only you"? No.
> 
> It went on for 3 years. Yes, you read that right. And i never ever thought that the negative stuff would come such was the dream it was in the beginning. I mean, i was foolish enough to believe that she was as faithful and devoted and commited as i was but that's what you beleive. I was wrong, but it took three years to finally find that out once and for all and get rid of her. I have never felt more free because it began to feel like an emotional prison; you thought you loved them, you didn't want to lose them, the distance tha twas between you somehow made the connection feel vulnerable so you tried all the harder to maintain it, but they were hurting you all same time. constant nagging doubts in the back of yoru head about what scheme they were up to this time.


^This.
I'm scared of that happening. How do you know what that person is really doing over there? How do you know you're the only person they are talking to and not one of many? Too many variables for me.

-

I think you can be in love with someone online, maybe. You just have to see if the conceivable positive outcomes outweigh the possible negative ones or not.


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## Nick Attwell (Jun 16, 2014)

My sentiments exactly with Quiet Guy, Cnikki, Kilobrav, Persephone & Ekardy

So Girlyone1...…

I would hate to find you no longer here, on SAS and someone saying she met this guy she met online & ended up dead

Though, of course, in reality, we would not know either way, unless someone who knows you real world (relative or friend of yours) told us

A bit of advice

I used to admin a real time chatroom

I chatted to this girl in Canada

This was long before I met my partner; it was in 2008 when I first went online & met the girl in Canada

Anyway,,,,,, she would cam up topless; so much so I kept her cam up whilst she was in my chatroom 

I often had to disable her cam (on my site; she could use it elsewhere on line)

She would pm me whining her cam doesn't work

I told her I had disabled it & she could have it back when she is not topless

So anyway...…………………

One evening we were chatting with cams up (she not being topless)

That evening she went way over the top; she apparently committed suicide on cam

The cam screen is the size of a match box. You can stretch it bigger; but doing that the pic pixelates

If I fly to Canada & she really is dead, I can't do anything, so what's the point?

But I thought I'd better go

I contacted her ISP & asked for a street fix on her ip address (ip address is only the server)

They said they can only release that information on a court order

Vanderhoof police were as helpful; like the isp, saying the isp will only release that information on a court order

One option left

I contacted my mate Slavey in Seattle. He has a computer company & what he doesn't know about computers is not worth knowing

He gave me a link to a programme that street fixes ip address

So I flew over & knocked on her door

She answered

I fk'd her off


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## girlyone1 (Jan 20, 2012)

Twocky61 said:


> My sentiments exactly with Quiet Guy, Cnikki, Kilobravo & Persephone
> 
> So Girlyone1...&#8230;
> 
> ...


Omg this is such a crazy story. You really cant trust who ppl are online.


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## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

Everybody is (more or less) the same person online. There are relatively few distinct personality types online. That's one thing that is very odd about the internet. It's such a direct form of communication with relatively little BS. Then if you meet the same person IRL, they feel compelled to "dress up" and perform and often you hardly recognize them.

Like I've met people I just sold something to on Craigslist and they seem totally fine until you meet them and then they act weird.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Love is just a hormonal thing, right? So I suppose so. But you don't really know the person till you meet them in person.


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## Nick Attwell (Jun 16, 2014)

girlyone1 said:


> Omg this is such a crazy story. You really cant trust who ppl are online.


Exactly Girlyone1

You need to get to really know him by camming & phoning each other

If you want my advice Girlyone1; just keep it online; do NOT meet real world

He could be a really nice genuine guy, but you don't know that.

Likewise he could be a rapist murderer; again you don't know that

For me there have been quite a few times the other party suggests we meet real world.

I kept to the golden internet rule, until I was forced into a corner by my now partner

If it wasn't for her, we never would have met real world & I wouldn't have put her ex in hospital

One particular woman in 2012 decided she was going to tour the UK & meet up with all her friends online; well, six of them, anyway

I was first on her list

She had told me she is coming to the UK & I would be first

"Yeah right" I thought "As if"

She phoned me when she landed at Heathrow and on the train from Waterloo

I waited at Christchurch railway station. The train stopped, but no sign of this daft bint

She phoned me she was unable to alight the train as the doors did not open. What really happened was she was in the rear five carriages. The platform is only five carriages long

I phoned her & told her at Bournemouth cross to the opposite platform. She actually took a taxi from Bournemouth station to Christchurch station


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## llodell88 (May 15, 2011)

komorikun said:


> Love is just a hormonal thing, right? So I suppose so. But you don't really know the person till you meet them in person.


i feel like all those hormones are whacked out in me for the past 5 year. get overly affectionate towards people, not as bad as it was, actually feel fairly normal now, can communicate with people better, better at putting myself in peoples shoes. im pretty grateful for that, should help a lot with future relationships. its really weird, feel one way, then whooosh, feels like my brain is releasing way too much of something. never read anything about vasopressin, oxytocin imbalances, but it really feels like i had something like that bad. not feeling as autistic as before if that's what it was lol, sure i still have some of that though. its weird to think someone could get all that from just chatting with someone online but it's not really my thing. a lot of people good at making you feel that stuff could just be good at manipulating feelings too. might have lots of other online girlfriends/boyfriends too  you never know.


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## smoothlinghs (Jun 2, 2018)

It is possible to be in love online but just as some other people are saying it is different than in real life. Some people open up easier in online and if they are honest you are able to get a deeper mental connection sooner. Then possibility is also it all basics on lies from your side, from his side or from your both's sides. Apparently meeting is necessary at one point and that shows if your connection is true or not or are you able to answer it even it would be true. I have been "in love" in online but I never wanted to meet. I just don't like the physical aspect. I don't like only online either so I guess there is no fitting shape to be in a relationship for me.


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## Nekobasu (Apr 22, 2018)

I met my first wife on the internet and even tho we got divorced years later, it was a wonderful fun marriage,


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## TheFighterStillRemains (Oct 3, 2010)

Yup. I knew I loved my bf before I met him. We talked (text, voice call and cam on skype) everyday throughout the day and when we finally met in person it felt so right. We've discussed spending the rest of our lives together, closing the distance, etc. and even though we're really being tested rn because of our circumstances I know this is real. This isn't the case for all situations, but it is possible.


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## Zatch (Apr 28, 2013)

Yep. I think it only happened to me because of how out of touch I was with people IRL in my youth. I spent so much time online it was almost like things were swapped. I found it easier to connect with people emotionally online and cherished it.

I think it's been straightened out over the years though. I've been less tuned into the web and more focused on things going on in person. Haven't regret it so far.


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## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Yes, happens quite often. But compare to meeting someone in person and having that blossom into a successful and long term relationship, the chance are much higher than meeting someone online and interacting with online mostly. Why I personally never see someone who has an online relationship really as an actual relationship until they start seeing each other in person consistently, or even living together.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

I think it's easy for your imagination to unrealistically fill in the gaps depending on what medium you're using to interact with the person. I.e., it's easy to fall in love with your idealized version of the person, and ignoring the semantics side of the argument, isn't really love at all.

The only analogy I can think of to explain what I'm trying to say is a pixellated picture. Text chat would be the most pixellated with a high chance of disillusionment when you met, video chat would be the least pixellated, etc. 

I still think in-the-flesh is the best way, but it's certainly POSSIBLE to fall in love with someone online, sure. You're just running the risk of having your fantasy confronted if you ever decide to meet up with the person.


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## Nekobasu (Apr 22, 2018)

Karsten said:


> I think it's easy for your imagination to unrealistically fill in the gaps depending on what medium you're using to interact with the person. I.e., it's easy to fall in love with your idealized version of the person, and ignoring the semantics side of the argument, isn't really love at all.
> 
> The only analogy I can think of to explain what I'm trying to say is a pixellated picture. Text chat would be the most pixellated with a high chance of disillusionment when you met, video chat would be the least pixellated, etc.
> 
> I still think in-the-flesh is the best way, but it's certainly POSSIBLE to fall in love with someone online, sure. You're just running the risk of having your fantasy confronted if you ever decide to meet up with the person.


This is actually some words of wisdom. Thumbs up m8 for this post


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

I don’t believe you can fall in love online but I do believe you can form very very strong bonds. To me love is born of in person interaction not just the ability to communicate persistently and build the initial bonds. And I don’t just mean sex if that what some are thinking


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## huzah (Sep 11, 2010)

You definitely can. Happened to me. It was slow though, not like IRL where I can become instantly infatuated with someone. Knew her for years, was 'just' a good friend. Then came the 'lets meet up sometime' - then the pictures - then the serious texting. Next thing ya know she's the last thing I think about when I go to bed & the first when I wake up.

It can happen man, I just think it takes a lot more time and a lot more talking than IRL. Your mileage may vary.


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## rmb1990 (Jan 16, 2015)

I think you could feel the emotions but it's impossible to truly love someone without meeting them. It's possible to feel the emotions without it being true also, it could be through lack of connection with people in your life. It's kinda hard to explain, but you aren't your thoughts or emotions anyway, so try not to let them rule your life.


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## smoothlinghs (Jun 2, 2018)

rmb1990 said:


> I think you could feel the emotions but it's impossible to truly love someone without meeting them. It's possible to feel the emotions without it being true also, it could be through lack of connection with people in your life. It's kinda hard to explain, but you aren't your thoughts or emotions anyway, so try not to let them rule your life.


Yeah, it is fun to see afterwards all those emotions were for nothing :wink2:.


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## Great Expectations (Jan 25, 2018)

Uncertainty and tension are two big factors in that "falling" feeling songs are written about and
the internet is well suited to provide it.


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## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

Of course it's possible. But it's doubtful that the people would actually get to know one another very well before they actually met and lived together. It is always best to try and live with someone before you make any other major decisions about a relationship with them.

If you can't live with one another, you won't know it until you've tried it (obviously). You will probably never fully see all their flaws and warts and wrinkles and odd quirks until you actually live with them.

Best would be like a single room apartment or something so neither of you can do anything the other one can't observe. If the two of you could cohabit in that situation for (say) a year and never get into a bad argument or anything, then you could actually say you're in love.

I think when most people "fall in love" with someone, what they actually fall in love with is their perception of that person's best possible facade. People fall in love with what other people want them to see and never see all the things they don't want them to see until much later.


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## Everlily (Sep 14, 2018)

It's definitely possible. Been there done that... At first we were just friends, then good friends, then even closer friends and bam! We got a crush for each other. Obviously it's different online than offline. I highly recommend to meet IRL as fast it as possible to meet, depending on the distance, time and money. Also speaking with voice chat or video chat helps as well. It's true that you might build these fairytale castles in your mind about the person, see everything through rose tinted glasses which is why it's even more important to meet face to face.


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## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

I'd imagine its possible, but an online persona is only one part of a person, a very lonely person could get swept up very easily and end up getting very hurt, it happens....common sense & caution :wink2:


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## Welliwonder (Feb 26, 2017)

Maybe with the idea of the person but not with the person themselves.


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## LivingEverAfter (Sep 16, 2018)

I don't think so. I think it's too easy for people to hide really big parts of themselves when you only know them online. I think you can get crushes and develop feelings, but I don't think you can genuinely fall in love the way you would in person.


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## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

I think a crush can develop especially if your getting attention you would otherwise not be, messages get misinterpreted for interest. It gets tricky because people can hide who they are online and create a complete persona. Really though I don't think you can really truly fall in love with someone unless you meet them. You need to be around them to get the vibes, understand there quirks, body language.. online is different from the real thing.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

yeah love is all in your head anyway. if it's just online it's pretty untested and it might not last through meeting etc. but if that's how you feel and the level of commitment you have then sure.


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## Kiwifruit (Dec 5, 2012)

I think you can have real feelings but tje information is limited. It's hard to really be part of someone's life without the in-person stuff.


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## Eleonora91 (Aug 3, 2018)

Unfortunately yes. I'm living proof of it. I always stated that you don't just fall in love with someone's body but also with their essence, their personality, their character, and their mind, and those things don't just disappear once they're on the web. However, it is harder to get to know someone online than it is in real life, because there are so many people that take advantage of that and present themselves as somebody else. So I would say that you can develop feelings for and even fall in love with someone online, but that doesn't necessarily mean it's true love. I would say dedication and sacrifice in trying to meet each other can prove it's real love in an online relationship.


edit: I should probably add that falling in love with someone online doesn't mean that you're gullible or out of touch with reality. I met my current boyfriend on a language website, so I think it already makes a difference that it wasn't a dating site. There are lots of creeps on those sites unfortunately and even on language boards, other social media etc... so as far as meeting unreliable people goes, that could happen anywhere. It also depends on how much time you both invest in each other. Some people are only in for a flirty chat while others are just the type of people that you'd meet in your everyday life that you end up meeting online instead. They could be people that find it hard to communicate in real life, because they're too shy, but have a lot to say and share once they're in a more comfortable environment.


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## Reverie101 (Jan 5, 2018)

Eleonora91 said:


> Unfortunately yes. I'm living proof of it. I always stated that you don't just fall in love with someone's body but also with their essence, their personality, their character, and their mind, and those things don't just disappear once they're on the web. However, it is harder to get to know someone online than it is in real life, because there are so many people that take advantage of that and present themselves as somebody else. So I would say that you can develop feelings for and even fall in love with someone online, but that doesn't necessarily mean it's true love. I would say dedication and sacrifice in trying to meet each other can prove it's real love in an online relationship.
> 
> edit: I should probably add that falling in love with someone online doesn't mean that you're gullible or out of touch with reality. I met my current boyfriend on a language website, so I think it already makes a difference that it wasn't a dating site. There are lots of creeps on those sites unfortunately and even on language boards, other social media etc... so as far as meeting unreliable people goes, that could happen anywhere. It also depends on how much time you both invest in each other. Some people are only in for a flirty chat while others are just the type of people that you'd meet in your everyday life that you end up meeting online instead. They could be people that find it hard to communicate in real life, because they're too shy, but have a lot to say and share once they're in a more comfortable environment.


I agree. And to everyone else... When it comes to online dating you just have to be smart about it...also I definitely wouldn't recommend it because the distance can be extremely taxing and as others have stated they can be doing only God knows what. Which is why I say idk online dating would be a last resort...because I feel real life organic relationships would be more beneficial.

However, many seem to think just because youre in someone's face that'll stop you from being played or stop them from cheating or that you know the real them. No. Alot of people marry spouses who turn out to be murderers or Pedophiles so I feel sometimes you really can't know everyone.

Yes you'll get red flags but sometimes some will surprise you and you just don't know ( whether in real life or online)

Just have to becareful.


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