# Would you date someone without a driver's license?



## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Would you still date someone if he or she didn't have a driver's license? I hardly go out and have been asked out exactly 2times in my life. I basically felt too embarrassed to accept because I was afraid of what they've might think if they found out I don't drive. I'm kind of bad at giving directions and I wouldn't feel comfortable having a stranger drive me. Anyone else experience this?


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## Paul (Sep 26, 2005)

It'd all depend on how far away from me she lived. If she's within 25 miles, then sure, it's no big deal for me to do the driving. 

There are lots of reasons why people don't drive and it's nothing to be ashamed of. If it's just fear, well driving is by far the most dangerous thing most people do, so it makes sense to be scared of it and is much more respectable than the idiots who speed wildly without signaling with no fear.

As for giving directions, that's a 20th century thing, we have GPS and google maps now.


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## ShadowOne (Jun 27, 2016)

yea, i would. assuming it's not super far, like Paul said

i also wouldnt feel comfortable having someone i dont know pick me up at my house. I think the bus or family/friends would be a better option while youre getting to know someone


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## Revenwyn (Apr 11, 2011)

I have. And I even married someone without one (he had medical reasons for not driving.) I don't drive either so we walked everywhere.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

I wouldn't care....she could learn later. I have my license and still can't drive no big deal .


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## GibberingMaw (Jul 3, 2017)

Yeah I would, I see it as no big deal.


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## Mondo_Fernando (Jun 26, 2014)

@missamr

Not really a problem. It could be something you and partner do together (learn to drive) as a date. Lots of fun, laughs.


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## Rains (Jan 20, 2016)

Couldn't care less about this. I live in a city with a lot of transport so it's not much of a pragmatic issue either.


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## acidicwithpanic (May 14, 2014)

It might be an issue if I needed something urgent to be done by them that would most likely require a car. But for the most part, I admire that actually. I wish I didn't have to rely on my car so much due to long commutes to school/work, and ideally I'd walk, ride a bike, or skate to my destination. If you live in a pretty big city, public transportation would be more convenient anyway.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

No, I don't like being a chauffeur.


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

I have been wondering this myself...

I have to either walk places if they are close enough, or rely on public transit in my town to get around. Otherwise my mother drives me places if we decide to go somewhere.


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## regimes (Aug 24, 2011)

Paul said:


> As for giving directions, that's a 20th century thing, we have GPS and google maps now.


^ this lol
i can't give directions worth a ****
i'll do the "well, go down that road and go that way" and whoever is listening will just be like "huh?" and then i go get someone else to give them directions.

but yeah, it probably won't be an issue, but have you tried getting your license? even if you don't go anywhere or have a car, maybe just having your license will feel like an accomplishment enough. and that way you can be like "i CAN drive i just don't WANT to" because loads of people don't like driving.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

regimes said:


> i can't give directions worth a ****
> i'll do the "well, go down that road and go that way" and whoever is listening will just be like "huh?" and then i go get someone else to give them directions.


Same

Its so embarrassing especially when people say we're new here can you tell us how to get to......or where is the nearest...... :fall


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## Crisigv (Aug 3, 2013)

nubly said:


> No, I don't like being a chauffeur.


This


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## Sabk (Jun 15, 2017)

Yes I would. And have.
There are other modes of transportation, soo..

Sent from my SM-G900H using Tapatalk


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

Yes, but he'd have to have some other way to get to me, because I don't have a driver's license or any other mode of transportation, myself. :/ I live in a rural area outside a small city, and public transport is almost nonexistent (plus it's too terrifying for me).

I can't give directions, either, but I imagine the only way this scenario would hold water is if the guy lives in the same area I do...moot point, anyway. All the guys I went to school with got in relationships and/or moved away long ago, and because I have no transportation, I have no other way to meet guys even IF any would be attracted to me. (*harsh laughter*)


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## Sabk (Jun 15, 2017)

Lol about giving directions. Where I am, there are barely any street names (they just started naming them late last year). So if you can't direct someone to your place or can't find your way to someone else's using key markers, you're screwed. 
Just last Friday, my siblings and I went to visit an aunt and cousin we hadn't seen in years. They have a B&B in the outskirts of town. The directions we got to get there were "you see the colored rocks outside of the large house? Take the first on the right, then the road forks out, take the far left one, drive by the small lake and then the first on the right...you should see two vans outside and some security guards..that's the house."
And we were driving at night. No GPS, no maps, no street name.

Sent from my SM-G900H using Tapatalk


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

> No, I don't like being a chauffeur.


Figured people would say that.

Nice to know that blind people like myself are unwanted by everyone else simply because of such trivialities as not having a goddamn drivers license even though I can get around regardless.

People are too shallow nowadays I guess.

Sorry, I just had to vent.


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## KILOBRAVO (Sep 17, 2011)

if she didn't drive then this would not be a deal breaker. In most of the time, its not really a deal breaker. 

when i was doing lessons, my driving instructor said that i was skilled enough that i could teach another person to drive. He even said that i can do some things better than some other instructors he's seen.

if she could not drive i would teach her and it would be something we can both have fun doing and this can be more of the bonding process. So a ''problem'' could later be made into something positive.


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## The Notorious D.B.L (Aug 2, 2016)

I don't drive and couldn't give a damn if someone I wanted to date drove or not.

It's nice to be able to drive but I enjoy public transport tbh, especially train travel. I find it really relaxing.


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## The Notorious D.B.L (Aug 2, 2016)

nubly said:


> No, I don't like being a chauffeur.





Crisigv said:


> This


But what if they were ok using public transport etc and didn't want you to drive their arses around everywhere? lol


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Pete Beale said:


> But what if they were ok using public transport etc and didn't want you to drive their arses around everywhere? lol


Gorgeous women can afford to be picky. Men like me can't. Pretty simple.


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## Noraborealis (Jul 3, 2017)

There is nothing to feel bad about. Lots of people don't drive because either they don't like it or there is no need. Some people can't drive for major health issues, like seizures.

I'd have no problem dating someone that doesn't drive. I wouldn't hold that against them any more than if they didn't like pizza. My mom always says that different isn't wrong. I used to hate driving, but I've grown to love it. It could be difficult if both people didn't drive, unless they lived in a very urban area like NY.


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## The Notorious D.B.L (Aug 2, 2016)

iAmCodeMonkey said:


> Gorgeous women can afford to be picky. Men like me can't. Pretty simple.


:frown2:

Well, for me, I couldn't care less if someone drives or not and I get around on public transport and my own two feet fine, so wouldn't be pestering someone who does drive to chauffeur me around.


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Pete Beale said:


> :frown2:
> 
> Well, for me, I couldn't care less if someone drives or not and I get around on public transport and my own two feet fine, so wouldn't be pestering someone who does drive to chauffeur me around.


To me, it is beyond shallow to use that as a _requirement_ for dating someone, regardless. I would not pester them ether, but still.


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## The Notorious D.B.L (Aug 2, 2016)

iAmCodeMonkey said:


> To me, it is beyond shallow to use that as a _requirement_ for dating someone, regardless. I would not pester them ether, but still.


I can understand it if they NEED the person to drive because they can't get public transport in the area, but for me, living in England and having great transports links, it's not an issue.


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## truant (Jul 4, 2014)

iAmCodeMonkey said:


> Nice to know that blind people like myself are unwanted by everyone else simply because of such trivialities as not having a goddamn drivers license even though I can get around regardless.


I can't drive because of my vertigo, so I've never seen not being able to drive as an issue. If I really need a car for some reason, I call a cab. Cabs are expensive, but a lot cheaper than owning a car, if you only need to use one a couple times a year. I had 3 LTRs and only one of them drove/owned a car. I spent most of my life walking or busing.


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## Crisigv (Aug 3, 2013)

Pete Beale said:


> But what if they were ok using public transport etc and didn't want you to drive their arses around everywhere? lol


That's okay I guess.


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Crisigv said:


> That's okay I guess.


Good. :wink


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## The Notorious D.B.L (Aug 2, 2016)

iAmCodeMonkey said:


> Good. :wink


This lol :grin2:


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## Twilightforce (Aug 7, 2016)

Sure. Why not?


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## nonhuman (Aug 22, 2016)

missamr said:


> Would you still date someone if he or she didn't have a driver's license? I hardly go out and have been asked out exactly 2times in my life. I basically felt too embarrassed to accept because I was afraid of what they've might think if they found out I don't drive. I'm kind of bad at giving directions and I wouldn't feel comfortable having a stranger drive me. Anyone else experience this?


Yes, I would. I don't have a drivers license either and I don't need one, because I'm from a capital city and I can arrive pretty much everything with the public transportation. You don't need one either if you're not from the country. And even if you are, in terms of dating no man will expect you to have one, I can guarantee you that. Men have other interests in women (and I'm not talking about sex). So having no driver's license is really nothing you should feel inferior for. Me as a man could make myself more thoughts about it in terms of my general attractive appearance, but I don't, so f'k it!>


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## Chris S W (Mar 5, 2017)

Yeah, that wouldn't be an issue. And taking directions wouldn't be necessary if they know the Address or Postcode, as I have a Sat Nav.


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## Ai (Oct 13, 2012)

It doesn't matter to me, though it might make things difficult from a practical perspective. I am too terrified to learn to drive (sometimes even being in a car with someone is nerve-wracking) and public transit around here is barely passable. Unless we lived within walking/biking distance of one another, it could get tricky.

The fact that my partner drives is one of the only reasons we're actually able to be together, given the distance. And it does make me feel pretty guilty.



iAmCodeMonkey said:


> Nice to know that blind people like myself are unwanted by everyone else simply because of such trivialities as not having a goddamn drivers license even though I can get around regardless.
> 
> People are too shallow nowadays I guess.
> 
> Sorry, I just had to vent.


... Everyone but two members (that's 21 people, if I counted correctly) in this thread have said it wouldn't be a deal-breaker. Those two people hardly account for "everyone else."


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## nonhuman (Aug 22, 2016)

iAmCodeMonkey said:


> Figured people would say that.
> 
> Nice to know that blind people like myself are unwanted by everyone else simply because of such trivialities as not having a goddamn drivers license even though I can get around regardless.
> 
> ...


I can hardly imagine how offensive that must be for you.

But still consider that this topic is discussed by people with big self confidence issues.

Nobody will judge you for not being able to drive.:smile2:


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Ai said:


> ... Everyone but two members (that's 21 people, if I counted correctly) in this thread have said it wouldn't be a deal-breaker. Those two people hardly account for "everyone else."


I was speaking in general terms when I said that, and not referring to people here. Sorry, I have not been in the greatest mood lately.


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## TheInvisibleHand (Sep 5, 2015)

iAmCodeMonkey said:


> I was speaking in general terms when I said that, and not referring to people here. Sorry, I have not been in the greatest mood lately.


Stop apologizing to people who don't care about you.


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## JH1983 (Nov 14, 2013)

I have before and would again. I like to drive and don't trust many others to drive me anyway. Even dating women with their license I drive 90% of the time.

Biggest problem would be that they almost couldn't work without driving where I live. Rural area with no public transportation makes driving a necessity.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Ai (Oct 13, 2012)

iAmCodeMonkey said:


> I was speaking in general terms when I said that, and not referring to people here. Sorry, I have not been in the greatest mood lately.


S'all good. Just wanted to make sure your anxiety wasn't obscuring the forest, as it were. There are plenty of compassionate, open-minded, understanding people out there--even if it doesn't seem like it.


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Ai said:


> S'all good. Just wanted to make sure your anxiety wasn't obscuring the forest, as it were. There are plenty of compassionate, open-minded, understanding people out there--even if it doesn't seem like it.


Thank you. I have been very depressed lately and it is nice to see that someone cares enough to respond back to me.

:hug :squeeze


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Sure, why not.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Yeh no ****s given.


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## Laurelles (Jun 28, 2017)

I sure hope people would because I intend on not driving for as long as I can get away with it


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

If I had my license and a car I would. Wouldn't bother me really


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## ShadowOne (Jun 27, 2016)

iAmCodeMonkey said:


> Figured people would say that.
> 
> Nice to know that blind people like myself are unwanted by everyone else simply because of such trivialities as not having a goddamn drivers license even though I can get around regardless.
> 
> ...


I know you're venting, and i get the frustration (i've had it in other contexts). But 90% of the people here said they would be okay with it. unless you want to date nubly 

It's a similar problem of hearing 9 good things from people and 1 bad thing, i'll often fixate on the one bad thing

edit: woops. I missed page 2 completely


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

ShadowOne said:


> I know you're venting, and i get the frustration (i've had it in other contexts). But 90% of the people here said they would be okay with it
> 
> It's a similar problem of hearing 9 good things from people and 1 bad thing, i'll often fixate on the one bad thing
> 
> edit: woops. I missed page 2 completely


That is fine, I guess. I have been feeling very depressed lately and just needed to vent.

Thanks for replying.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

KILOBRAVO said:


> if she didn't drive then this would not be a deal breaker. In most of the time, its not really a deal breaker.
> 
> when i was doing lessons, my driving instructor said that i was skilled enough that i could teach another person to drive. He even said that i can do some things better than some other instructors he's seen.
> 
> if she could not drive i would teach her and it would be something we can both have fun doing and this can be more of the bonding process. So a ''problem'' could later be made into something positive.


Nice! Good to know there are generous people such as yourself who would offer to teach rather than judge


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Paul said:


> It'd all depend on how far away from me she lived. If she's within 25 miles, then sure, it's no big deal for me to do the driving.
> 
> There are lots of reasons why people don't drive and it's nothing to be ashamed of. If it's just fear, well driving is by far the most dangerous thing most people do, so it makes sense to be scared of it and is much more respectable than the idiots who speed wildly without signaling with no fear.
> 
> As for giving directions, that's a 20th century thing, we have GPS and google maps now.


Yeah, fear can be crippling but I know I will need to get over it and get my license! Thank you for your response!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

ShadowOne said:


> yea, i would. assuming it's not super far, like Paul said
> 
> i also wouldnt feel comfortable having someone i dont know pick me up at my house. I think the bus or family/friends would be a better option while youre getting to know someone


I agree, it would be best to get to know someone before giving them the control of driving you somewhere.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Revenwyn said:


> I have. And I even married someone without one (he had medical reasons for not driving.) I don't drive either so we walked everywhere.


That sounds like true love, thank you for your response!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Kevin001 said:


> I wouldn't care....she could learn later. I have my license and still can't drive no big deal .


You already a driver's license? Very cool, I have a regular id right now


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

GibberingMaw said:


> Yeah I would, I see it as no big deal.


Nice, Thanks for the reply!


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## jeanny (Apr 17, 2014)

Sure.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

ANX1 said:


> @missamr
> 
> Not really a problem. It could be something you and partner do together (learn to drive) as a date. Lots of fun, laughs.


That's a cool idea! I'm sure a date like that would really tell a lot about a couple's compatibility (or incompatibility lol)


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Rains said:


> Couldn't care less about this. I live in a city with a lot of transport so it's not much of a pragmatic issue either.


Nice, thank you for your reply!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

acidicwithpanic said:


> It might be an issue if I needed something urgent to be done by them that would most likely require a car. But for the most part, I admire that actually. I wish I didn't have to rely on my car so much due to long commutes to school/work, and ideally I'd walk, ride a bike, or skate to my destination. If you live in a pretty big city, public transportation would be more convenient anyway.


Yeah that's true, there are times where it could be a necessity such as emergencies and such. Thanks for your response!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

nubly said:


> No, I don't like being a chauffeur.


Yeah it could become an issue in certain situations, thanks for your response!


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## Overcast (May 4, 2016)

Yeah. I don't see how a driver's license is relevant when it comes to dating. I've had my license for a few years now but I hate driving with a passion, unless it's out in the countryside where there aren't many cars.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

regimes said:


> ^ this lol
> i can't give directions worth a ****
> i'll do the "well, go down that road and go that way" and whoever is listening will just be like "huh?" and then i go get someone else to give them directions.
> 
> but yeah, it probably won't be an issue, but have you tried getting your license? even if you don't go anywhere or have a car, maybe just having your license will feel like an accomplishment enough. and that way you can be like "i CAN drive i just don't WANT to" because loads of people don't like driving.


I agree, having a license would feel much better. I went for a permit a couple of years ago, got two days of lessons with an instructor and was becoming more confident driving on empty streets,but then stopped going for personal reasons. I agree, having the license would feel much better. Thanks for the response!


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## Mondo_Fernando (Jun 26, 2014)

missamr said:


> That's a cool idea! I'm sure a date like that would really tell a lot about a couple's compatibility (or incompatibility lol)


Ability to work through arguments. :yes :grin2:

This Australian woman learnt to drive with her BF (now her husband) when driving in America (opposite side of the road to Australia where she would be where he is seated) -






:lol


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

tehuti88 said:


> Yes, but he'd have to have some other way to get to me, because I don't have a driver's license or any other mode of transportation, myself. :/ I live in a rural area outside a small city, and public transport is almost nonexistent (plus it's too terrifying for me).
> 
> I can't give directions, either, but I imagine the only way this scenario would hold water is if the guy lives in the same area I do...moot point, anyway. All the guys I went to school with got in relationships and/or moved away long ago, and because I have no transportation, I have no other way to meet guys even IF any would be attracted to me. (*harsh laughter*)


That does sound hard :/ At least we know we aren't the only people on earth without a license!Thank you for your response!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Sabk said:


> Lol about giving directions. Where I am, there are barely any street names (they just started naming them late last year). So if you can't direct someone to your place or can't find your way to someone else's using key markers, you're screwed.
> Just last Friday, my siblings and I went to visit an aunt and cousin we hadn't seen in years. They have a B&B in the outskirts of town. The directions we got to get there were "you see the colored rocks outside of the large house? Take the first on the right, then the road forks out, take the far left one, drive by the small lake and then the first on the right...you should see two vans outside and some security guards..that's the house."
> And we were driving at night. No GPS, no maps, no street name.
> 
> Sent from my SM-G900H using Tapatalk


lol! That's probably the best way to remember directions. thanks for the reply!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

EdwinC0031 said:


> My concern would be long term. At some point the other needs to be able to drive for practical reasons. Or what if there's an emergency and you need to drive to safety. But it wouldn't be some deal breaker.


I agree completely, driving is a necessity in those situations. Thanks for the reply!


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## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)

my license has been suspended for some time now, barely sorting tht out. lol. 
Dont think thts a big deal, anxiety makes us paranoid about random things i think. But not wanting to be driven around by a stranger is probably a reasonable preference


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Pete Beale said:


> I don't drive and couldn't give a damn if someone I wanted to date drove or not.
> 
> It's nice to be able to drive but I enjoy public transport tbh, especially train travel. I find it really relaxing.


I've only been on a train once, but I agree, it can be pretty relaxing! Thanks for your reply!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Noraborealis said:


> There is nothing to feel bad about. Lots of people don't drive because either they don't like it or there is no need. Some people can't drive for major health issues, like seizures.
> 
> I'd have no problem dating someone that doesn't drive. I wouldn't hold that against them any more than if they didn't like pizza. My mom always says that different isn't wrong. I used to hate driving, but I've grown to love it. It could be difficult if both people didn't drive, unless they lived in a very urban area like NY.


That's really cool that you enjoy driving now! I'm sure it feels better with experience. Thanks for the reply.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

nonhuman said:


> Yes, I would. I don't have a drivers license either and I don't need one, because I'm from a capital city and I can arrive pretty much everything with the public transportation. You don't need one either if you're not from the country. And even if you are, in terms of dating no man will expect you to have one, I can guarantee you that. Men have other interests in women (and I'm not talking about sex). So having no driver's license is really nothing you should feel inferior for. Me as a man could make myself more thoughts about it in terms of my general attractive appearance, but I don't, so f'k it!>


you get to where you need to go, that's the important part, thanks for the reply!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Chris S W said:


> Yeah, that wouldn't be an issue. And taking directions wouldn't be necessary if they know the Address or Postcode, as I have a Sat Nav.


thank you for your reply!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

JH1983 said:


> I have before and would again. I like to drive and don't trust many others to drive me anyway. Even dating women with their license I drive 90% of the time.
> 
> Biggest problem would be that they almost couldn't work without driving where I live. Rural area with no public transportation makes driving a necessity.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Good to know, very cute kitten in your avatar by the way!!thanks for the reply


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

truant said:


> I can't drive because of my vertigo, so I've never seen not being able to drive as an issue. If I really need a car for some reason, I call a cab. Cabs are expensive, but a lot cheaper than owning a car, if you only need to use one a couple times a year. I had 3 LTRs and only one of them drove/owned a car. I spent most of my life walking or busing.


Thanks for the reply, cabs do seem convenient, especially if you only need them a couple of times an year. I've heard of vertigo before but don't know much about it! That's great that you don't let it stop you from going where you need to go!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

ANX1 said:


> Ability to work through arguments. :yes :grin2:
> 
> This Australian woman learnt to drive with her BF (now her husband) when driving in America (opposite side of the road to Australia where she would be where he is seated) -
> 
> ...


lol wow! that looks nerve-wracking lol


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

I wouldn't care whether they drove or not. I'll buy us a two seat bicycle.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Overcast said:


> Yeah. I don't see how a driver's license is relevant when it comes to dating. I've had my license for a few years now but I hate driving with a passion, unless it's out in the countryside where there aren't many cars.


yeah or in the old days where there were less cars I'm sure driving was more pleasurable!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Going crazy said:


> my license has been suspended for some time now, barely sorting tht out. lol.
> Dont think thts a big deal, anxiety makes us paranoid about random things i think. But not wanting to be driven around by a stranger is probably a reasonable preference


It can definitely make one overthink things. Thanks for the reply!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Karsten said:


> I wouldn't care whether they drove or not. I'll buy us a two seat bicycle.


Nice! Do you live in New York? I'm sure a lot of people don't have licenses there with all the public transportation.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

missamr said:


> Nice! Do you live in New York? I'm sure a lot of people don't have licenses there with all the public transportation.


Sometimes I wish I lived in the city so I could have an excuse, lmao.


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## causalset (Sep 11, 2016)

missamr said:


> Would you still date someone if he or she didn't have a driver's license? I hardly go out and have been asked out exactly 2times in my life. I basically felt too embarrassed to accept because I was afraid of what they've might think if they found out I don't drive. I'm kind of bad at giving directions and I wouldn't feel comfortable having a stranger drive me. Anyone else experience this?


I don't drive either, and I am open about it. _For all I know_ it wasn't an issue, and they were only bringing it up as a bad thing when they disliked me for other things. As long as they liked me in other departments (which happens very rarely due to my Asperger) they were more than willing to be accommodating when it comes to driving. Perhaps the only thing that might be "honest" reason that is related to driving is when I was rejected due to distance, and thats where it could have helped if I drove. But still it could or it could not: if we are talking about other states, I doubt I would have time to drive that far on a regular basis even if I could drive. Or if we are talking about the same state just a different town, the distance thing could also have been a way of letting me down easy.

In any case, to answer your question: yes I would date someone who doesn't drive. It would be hypocritical of me to impose on others the standarts that I myself don't meet.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

missamr said:


> You already a driver's license? Very cool, I have a regular id right now


Yup......barely passed the test the 2nd time but its been 5yrs .


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## Mondo_Fernando (Jun 26, 2014)

missamr said:


> lol wow! that looks nerve-wracking lol


But a lot of fun as they joke around a lot. :grin2:


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## GibberingMaw (Jul 3, 2017)

missamr said:


> Nice, Thanks for the reply!


You're welcome.


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

TheInvisibleHand said:


> Stop apologizing to people who don't care about you.


Okay then. :roll

/sarcasm


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Well, they would have take the bus I guess to go to whatever place we'd hang out at. If he lived somewhere where there was little to no public transportation then it would not work out. Definitely wouldn't date someone that needed a ride for every date. Just a fact of life that you have to be mobile. Taxis are expensive if you take them frequently and bumming off rides from people gets old fast.

I plan on learning how to drive and getting my license in the next few months. Probably won't buy a car for a while though. Maybe in a year or so.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

komorikun said:


> Well, they would have take the bus I guess to go to whatever place we'd hang out at. If he lived somewhere where there was little to no public transportation then it would not work out. Definitely wouldn't date someone that needed a ride for every date. Just a fact of life that you have to be mobile. Taxis are expensive if you take them frequently and bumming off rides from people gets old fast.
> 
> I plan on learning how to drive and getting my license in the next few months. Probably won't buy a car for a while though. Maybe in a year or so.


Good luck! Thanks for the reply.


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## Steve French (Sep 17, 2012)

I was having a conversation on this with an old friend of mine the other day. Well, he was ragging on his ex-wife and I was listening and this was one of the topics that came up. He seemed really irritated by the fact that he had to chauffeur her everywhere, all the time, due to what I inferred as mental health issues. I guess they also had two kids so it was not one person but three all the time. I didn't get why they didn't just use the public transit, which was ubiquitous in their city, but I digress.

Being able to drive here is almost a necessity, as there is **** all public transit and it is often quite terrible weather and the city is quite spread out. And I find I like to drive, have that control over whether I get into a fiery car crash or not. But I have never had to be in the situation where I had to be someone's personal taxi. It might prevent me from getting ****tered every time I left my home. That would be nice. Maybe even encourage me to walk or bike around. Sure, I'd give it a try. It's not like it is a 100% unfixable thing.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Steve French said:


> I was having a conversation on this with an old friend of mine the other day. Well, he was ragging on his ex-wife and I was listening and this was one of the topics that came up. He seemed really irritated by the fact that he had to chauffeur her everywhere, all the time, due to what I inferred as mental health issues. I guess they also had two kids so it was not one person but three all the time. I didn't get why they didn't just use the public transit, which was ubiquitous in their city, but I digress.
> 
> Being able to drive here is almost a necessity, as there is **** all public transit and it is often quite terrible weather and the city is quite spread out. And I find I like to drive, have that control over whether I get into a fiery car crash or not. But I have never had to be in the situation where I had to be someone's personal taxi. It might prevent me from getting ****tered every time I left my home. That would be nice. Maybe even encourage me to walk or bike around. Sure, I'd give it a try. It's not like it is a 100% unfixable thing.


Interesting. I dont plan on staying this way forever, especially not if I plan on having a family in the future. Right now I have people to help me with that but I know that will not be the case forever. Thank you for your kind message! You sound really mature for 25 btw.


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## Miguel33 (Jun 14, 2017)

Yes, I would, i have a driver's license but i don't drive too often.


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

It's the last thing on my mind. I mean I live in a big city loaded with public transport and I ride a bicycle everywhere. I would hope to find someone who is like me actually.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Miguel33 said:


> Yes, I would, i have a driver's license but i don't drive too often.


Cool! thanks for the reply


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Scrub-Zero said:


> It's the last thing on my mind. I mean I live in a big city loaded with public transport and I ride a bicycle everywhere. I would hope to find someone who is like me actually.


Those are very good reasons for you not to drive. Thanks for the reply!


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## LilMeRich (Jun 2, 2017)

Yes I would. It means they would have to ride pillion on my motorcycle holding on to me


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## sad1231234 (Jul 10, 2016)

Dont worry about it. 1, drivers license is not a deciding factor in a relationship unless the person wants you for any reason other than personality. 2, most guys take girls out on dates rather than vice versa so dont worry about it.


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

sad1231234 said:


> Dont worry about it. 1, drivers license is not a deciding factor in a relationship unless the person wants you for any reason other than personality. 2, most guys take girls out on dates rather than vice versa so dont worry about it.


My brain always finds a way to worry about such trivialities. Always.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

LilMeRich said:


> Yes I would. It means they would have to ride pillion on my motorcycle holding on to me


You ride motorcycles? Sounds pretty exciting,hope you're not against wearing helmets :-0


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## Maverick34 (Feb 18, 2013)

Yes. Would you? :smile2:


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

sad1231234 said:


> Dont worry about it. 1, drivers license is not a deciding factor in a relationship unless the person wants you for any reason other than personality. 2, most guys take girls out on dates rather than vice versa so dont worry about it.


Thanks for the reply. That's true, it can be a good filter for those who don't really care about someone.


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## Deaf Mute (Jun 12, 2017)

I only have my learner's and that was just to get more identification, lmao... I just walk or take the train/bus everywhere.


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## blissfullyblue (Jul 15, 2017)

i am absolutely terrified of driving. i lived in a relatively big city with great transportation, and thats how i got around + walking, which was great because i NEVER needed to drive. i hate driving so much, but i feel like such a burden being dependent on people i never ask them to take me anywhere. I've been driving for 2 years now, just with my permit, had to get it renewed /: and no matter what I'm an anxious mess each time, literally will have a panic attack while driving which sucks, esp when the person driving w me is being an *******. 

i suck at taking my own advice, but not having your license is NOT a deal breaker. in fact, if someone won't go out with you because of that then they probably didn't get the chance to know you at all. maybe one day we'll both be driving.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Maverick34 said:


> Yes. Would you? :smile2:


If I drove I suppose so lol


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## Eternal Solitude (Jun 11, 2017)

One of the first things I did after graduating college was to get a driver's license. 

If you live near a college campus or in a big city not having a license is not a big deal as there are alternative ways to get around. Now, if you live in a suburban wasteland (like the one I live in now :laugh: ) having a license becomes a necessity for basic survival ( shopping for food, driving to work, etc...)

I remember being terrified of driving for a very long time. My mind would conjure up worst case scenarios like : me running over a baby on a stroller, me backing up and hitting a little girl leaving her paraplegic, me making a wrong turn and ending up in an interstate highway going 80mph and in that moment of confusion I would panic and switch lanes causing a major wreck that in turn would cause a huge explosion and that in turn would wipe out a family of 4 ,etc...

Needless to say, I put off getting a license for the longest time and once I got one I drove like an old lady for the longest time. :laugh: 

But here is the thing: driving very much like math, physical exercise or playing an instrument depends a lot on experience. The more you do it and the more you practice the easier it gets. Once you get a hold of it , it becomes as natural as moving your own legs to move around. In a sense , your car become another limb of your body that you control at will. 

The hard part is getting through those first baby steps .


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

blissfullyblue said:


> i am absolutely terrified of driving. i lived in a relatively big city with great transportation, and thats how i got around + walking, which was great because i NEVER needed to drive. i hate driving so much, but i feel like such a burden being dependent on people i never ask them to take me anywhere. I've been driving for 2 years now, just with my permit, had to get it renewed /: and no matter what I'm an anxious mess each time, literally will have a panic attack while driving which sucks, esp when the person driving w me is being an *******.
> 
> i suck at taking my own advice, but not having your license is NOT a deal breaker. in fact, if someone won't go out with you because of that then they probably didn't get the chance to know you at all. maybe one day we'll both be driving.


I'm sorry about your panic attacks during driving It's the unpredictable aspect of it that drives our fear I think, which sucks:/ Let's have hope we will get over this fear! I too hate to ask people to drive me which is why I haven't had many experiences throughout my 20s. I wish you the best!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Deaf Mute said:


> I only have my learner's and that was just to get more identification, lmao... I just walk or take the train/bus everywhere.


Nice, doesn't sound like a problem at all for you, that's good that you take public transport, saves money and the hassle of having a car!


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## Deaf Mute (Jun 12, 2017)

missamr said:


> Nice, doesn't sound like a problem at all for you, that's good that you take public transport, saves money and the *hassle of having a car!*


Yeah this makes me anxious, actually owning a car and having to pay registration every year... plus if you get in an accident or damage your car, ugh, effort..


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

blissfullyblue said:


> in fact, if someone won't go out with you because of that then they probably didn't get the chance to know you at all.


Thanks. At least someone here understands me.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Yeah I would. I've been studying to get my driver's license so soon I'll have to get it.


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

sad1231234 said:


> Dont worry about it. 1, drivers license is not a deciding factor in a relationship unless the person wants you for any reason other than personality. 2, *most guys take girls out on dates rather than vice versa so dont worry about it*.


That's what I was thinking. It would never occur to me that this would be something you should worry about.

My son still doesn't have his licence - I think he just gets taxis or uber or something. His gf might drive but I can't remember. It's not something you should worry about.


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## cmed (Oct 17, 2009)

It doesn't matter. These little dating prerequisites people have usually fly right out the window the second they meet someone they really like.


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## sad1231234 (Jul 10, 2016)

harrison said:


> That's what I was thinking. It would never occur to me that this would be something you should worry about.
> 
> My son still doesn't have his licence - I think he just gets taxis or uber or something. His gf might drive but I can't remember. It's not something you should worry about.


Yeah exactly, i think any reason other than personality would be a deal breaker for me. I mean i get that people are only human and want someone who is attractive to some extent, but to not date someone just because they dont have a drivers license, pffft. It would be an immediate indication that they are looking for something cheap/quick/short term.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

ravens said:


> Yeah I would. I've been studying to get my driver's license so soon I'll have to get it.


Oh congrats bro, shows its never too late .


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Kevin001 said:


> Oh congrats bro, shows its never too late .


Thanks. I had my learner's permit when I was 17 and never tried to get my license.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

ravens said:


> Thanks. I had my learner's permit when I was 17 and never tried to get my license.


Congratulations, this is very encouraging  Best of luck on getting that license!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

harrison said:


> That's what I was thinking. It would never occur to me that this would be something you should worry about.
> 
> My son still doesn't have his licence - I think he just gets taxis or uber or something. His gf might drive but I can't remember. It's not something you should worry about.


Thanks for your reply,Harrison. I've heard that many young people in big cities like NYC use Uber.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

cmed said:


> It doesn't matter. These little dating prerequisites people have usually fly right out the window the second they meet someone they really like.


That's true, I suppose in the beginning they wouldn't care


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## londongirl (Jul 11, 2017)

Yeah it's fine, but they better pay for gas. Not just half the gas or most of the gas, ALL of it. Their credit/debit cards need to be out and ready each time we stop at a gas station. They also must buy me nice gifts and call me beautiful. I'm not going to driving around some dude for nothing.


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## a degree of freedom (Sep 28, 2011)

cmed said:


> It doesn't matter. These little dating prerequisites people have usually fly right out the window the second they meet someone they really like.


That's what I think too.


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

opcorn


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Eternal Solitude said:


> One of the first things I did after graduating college was to get a driver's license.
> 
> If you live near a college campus or in a big city not having a license is not a big deal as there are alternative ways to get around. Now, if you live in a suburban wasteland (like the one I live in now :laugh: ) having a license becomes a necessity for basic survival ( shopping for food, driving to work, etc...)
> 
> ...


All those scenarios you mentioned are the kind of things I would think about too! Good to know that with experience driving can become as natural as walking..Thank you for your reply!  I hope to get mine when I graduate too!


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## cubsfandave (Jul 20, 2016)

I would date a person without a driver's license if they had lots and lots of money to buy me stuff!


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## LilMeRich (Jun 2, 2017)

missamr said:


> You ride motorcycles? Sounds pretty exciting,hope you're not against wearing helmets :-0


I do. Helmets are the law in the UK so helmets all around here! :smile2:


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

LilMeRich said:


> I do. Helmets are the law in the UK so helmets all around here! :smile2:


Cool&#128077;&#127995;&#128513; I'm from the states and not all people, but some people don't use helmets at all..:-0


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## blissfullyblue (Jul 15, 2017)

if you ever want to talk, I'm here


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## blissfullyblue (Jul 15, 2017)

thanks! i hope it passes eventually... everyone says as you keep driving you'll get over it, but i've been driving for over 2 years now and still nothing. the surmounting anxiety i get just from driving, and then add people in the car? total disaster.


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Yeah, no problem! At least you are able to drive despite the anxiety, that's respectable.


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## KILOBRAVO (Sep 17, 2011)

ravens said:


> Thanks. I had my learner's permit when I was 17 and never tried to get my license.


Go Ravens! I'm sure you'll do great.



missamr said:


> Yeah, no problem! At least you are able to drive despite the anxiety, that's respectable.


When you are driving around, there is so much to see and react to, there's not any time to be anxious.  I have read a while ago that some people only tend to drive in local areas for as long as 2 years after passing their test.

By the way, in my country, technically you're supposed to show the probationer plate for up to 2 years after passing. You are not really considered an 'experianced driving person' until after 2 years when you are in the probationer phase.

By the way, i suppose in your country, most of the cars are automatic?


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## DistraughtOwl (Mar 1, 2014)

It depends if you're male or female.


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## thetown (Aug 16, 2014)

Nah, they can just call an Uber.


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*Yep*

cos I'll drive her around0

adding a reason to put my car to use


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

KILOBRAVO said:


> Go Ravens! I'm sure you'll do great.
> 
> When you are driving around, there is so much to see and react to, there's not any time to be anxious.  I have read a while ago that some people only tend to drive in local areas for as long as 2 years after passing their test.
> 
> ...


yeah, Most cars here are automatic


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

Lovecrushed said:


> Nah, they can just call an Uber.


Yeah, for some people uber can be really convenient..


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

twitchy666 said:


> cos I'll drive her around0
> 
> adding a reason to put my car to use


Lol ,good to know not everyone is judgmental about that!


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## missamr (Apr 14, 2017)

DistraughtOwl said:


> It depends if you're male or female.


Thank you for your reply,


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## May19 (Apr 25, 2012)

I dated a guy who's older than me and didn't have a license. It wasn't that bad, but it was a bit inconvenient because we lived about 2 hrs away counting traffic, so I always drove up. Had to pay toll and gas money which was a bit meh. 

After my experience, I will say that it is somewhat a deal breaker for me, not because they don't drive, but because they can't legally. And what I mean by that is I have an eye condition that wears out my eyesight after prolong driving. So usually when it hits the 2 hr mark of nonstop driving, I need to switch with people. Of course, it wouldn't matter all that much unless we're taking road trips, but when it comes to that, what can we do? Plus, my eye sight is really bad at night, and I get really bad anxiety driving at nighttime. I think it would stress me out a lot if I constantly had to drive the person even when I'm not feeling well.


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## Bbpuff (Sep 1, 2010)

I currently am dating someone who doesn't have a license. My ex also didn't have his license, but I helped him get his. I believe the older you get, the more unappealing it tends to be. Right now as he is only 19, I don't see it as that big of a deal. But I would like him to get one in the near future.

If someone simply flat out refused on ever getting their license, that would probably be a deal breaker for me.


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