# My new female therapist is attractive



## Mr Bacon

I've seen 3 psychiatrists in the past for my anxiety/depression, all males (mainly for CBT, talking about random issues and meds prescription). Didn't work out.

I've decided to see a psychologist this time - to try alternative therapies - and she happens to be a female. Haven't met her yet, just took an appointment, but based on the pics I saw on her website, she's a good-looking woman in her 30s.

I don't know if it's going to completely block me, or if it will allow me to be more comfortable, but I guess it's worth a try. To be frank, I don't expect much from therapy as I believe my issue is mainly on a biological level, but I'm willing to try anything to get some peace of mind and feel better.

*What's your experience with an opposite gender therapist?*


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## Steinerz

My experience? Can't stop thinking about dirty scenarios.


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## Going Sane

I couldnt be honest with my female therapist which all of them have been except for 1 gay dude, i only had like 5 therapist since i was a teen but the fact that they were young woman made it difficult to open up plus they weren't too skilled. 
Good look tho mr bacon, stay SASsy :b


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## Alone75

I'd probably feel more anxious if I found the therapist attractive and I'd be too ashamed to open up more. I'm going to start again in a few weeks myself and can't say I'm looking forward to it.


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## Umpalumpa

Mind effects body and visa versa, so I don't think it's accurate to say that your problem is only biological.

I find female therapists to be better, they are giving off better vibe, I feel I can trust them better, they don't think that they are the smartest individuals in the world like men tend to do, also I find myself very hostile torwards male therapists.
Sexual tension can take you a few steps back though.


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## Mr Bacon

Umpalumpa said:


> Mind effects body and visa versa, so I don't think it's accurate to say that your problem is only biological.
> 
> I find female therapists to be better, they are giving off better vibe, I feel I can trust them better, they don't think that they are the smartest individuals in the world like men tend to do, also I find myself very hostile torwards male therapists.
> Sexual tension can take you a few steps back though.


Sure, the mind affects the body and vice-versa. My hypothesis is that since I've always had SA and low grade depression, for as long as I can remember, the cause is most likely biological. Many other members of my family are this way too: mom, grand parents, uncle, cousins...

Other than that, I can't think of a single reason why I'd be so F-ed up. I wasn't heavily bullied, my parents love me and wanna help me - plus they're financially at ease - I have a couple friends, I'm in a top university, I can't complain about my looks... where the hell would have the problem originated from? It boggles my mind.


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## Umpalumpa

Mr Bacon said:


> Sure, the mind affects the body and vice-versa. My hypothesis is that since I've always had SA and low grade depression, for as long as I can remember, the cause is most likely biological. Many other members of my family are this way too: mom, grand parents, uncle, cousins...
> 
> Other than that, I can't think of a single reason why I'd be so F-ed up. I wasn't heavily bullied, my parents love me and wanna help me - plus they're financially at ease - I have a couple friends, I'm in a top university, I can't complain about my looks... where the hell would have the problem originated from? It boggles my mind.


A good way for me to figure things out is asking myself what do I want, and after I manage to sort those things I'm asking myself - what's holding me from achieving them at this exact very moment.

For example, I want a girl friend, but after I have thought about what it really means and not just throwing those words randomly to the air -
I'm afraid from commitment right now, I'm afraid to get hurt again, change can be scary right now for me and so on, and then I see, wow, this wish for a girlfriend is not...100% wanted by me, (figuring that is a big step, suddenly you understand yourself better) and then...I'm working on my fears. I do not intend to live hand by hand with those fears, and I will not let them dictate my life.

Sorry about my English.
I got this retarded fear of showing off as a snob, so, I hope it doesn't seems snobbish.


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## sad vlad

My first therapist was a woman in her 30's. 34 I think.

I was never interested in her in any other way than the professional aspect. I went there to get help, not to play the part of Casanova. She really tried to help me, although she had a rough period. She was open about her own issues. She was also warm and a bit funny. I could ask about anything that was bothering me, even outside my therapy. 

My reserves were:
* does she have enough experience?
* she adopted a few New Age ideas that I wasn't much fond of. Too abstract/philosophical for my taste.


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## oneofmany

I have a psychiatrist, and a psychologist. They are both very attractive, and my age. It's complicated. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that there will never be a personal relationship, so I I'm not to anxious around them. That said, it does give me a really good feeling to get some of they're attention.
I always try to walk beside or in front of them as we walk from the waiting room her office though, because I'm afraid one of them might think I was looking at her butt if I walked behind.:afr


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## sad vlad

Mr Bacon said:


> My hypothesis is that since I've always had SA and low grade depression, for as long as I can remember, the cause is most likely biological. Many other members of my family are this way too: mom, grand parents, uncle, cousins...
> 
> Other than that, I can't think of a single reason why I'd be so F-ed up. I wasn't heavily bullied, my parents love me and wanna help me - plus they're financially at ease - I have a couple friends, I'm in a top university, I can't complain about my looks... where the hell would have the problem originated from? It boggles my mind.


Yes, you could have a considerable biological vulnerability. I have that too, according to my new therapist. He said we will work on that too. Will see.

Are you a perfectionist? Or have you always imposed yourself high standards? Being the best or one of the best in most of the things? Feeling depressed, disappointed in yourself for not achieving those self imposed goals? Maybe keep comparing yourself with others and always in your disadvantage? We tend to borrow irrational beliefs from our caregivers but we are also creating new ones on our own.

You've mentioned hypomania. Do you have bipolar or another condition? In that case, the cause of your SA is that main disorder.


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## probably offline

AceP said:


> *I'd probably feel more anxious if I found the therapist attractive and I'd be too ashamed to open up more*. I'm going to start again in a few weeks myself and can't say I'm looking forward to it.


Me too.


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## scooby

Last month when I was in hospital, an attractive psychiatrist saw me. Surprisingly even though it kept going through my mind that I found her attractive, I was able to be just as honest in answering questions and what my thoughts are just as I would with my regular psychiatrist. I hope that it wasn't just an outlier, because I'll be switching a new psychiatrist as well as starting to see a psychologist in the near future and I have no idea if they are male or female or attractive or not.


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## Mr Bacon

oneofmany said:


> I always try to walk beside or in front of them as we walk from the waiting room her office though, because I'm afraid one of them might think I was looking at her butt if I walked behind.:afr


:lol God didn't give her a great butt for you to walk in front!



sad vlad said:


> Yes, you could have a considerable biological vulnerability. I have that too, according to my new therapist. He said we will work on that too. Will see.
> 
> Are you a perfectionist? Or have you always imposed yourself high standards? Being the best or one of the best in most of the things? Feeling depressed, disappointed in yourself for not achieving those self imposed goals? Maybe keep comparing yourself with others and always in your disadvantage? We tend to borrow irrational beliefs from our caregivers but we are also creating new ones on our own.
> 
> You've mentioned hypomania. Do you have bipolar or another condition? In that case, the cause of your SA is that main disorder.


I'm most definitely a perfectionist, and I desire to be one of the best in most things I do. I usually fail because of the lack of will power and energy. I presume it's part of what you'd call a neurotic - I perfectly fit the description.

I've had very short bouts of hypomania, or at least I suppose that's what one would call "hypomania." However I haven't been diagnosed as bipolar. The episodes are way too short, and extremely rare. My shrinks have said it doesn't look like anything they've heard of.

How does your therapist expect to "work on your biological vulnerability"?


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## sad vlad

Mr Bacon said:


> My shrinks have said it doesn't look like anything they've heard of.


Strange answer. There is no such thing as never seen before. Cause that would mean it would be a whole new disorder.

My guess is they are not sure exactly where you are fitting because your symptoms are not obvious enough to pinpoint to a certain disorder, without a doubt. They are probably split between few possibilities.



Mr Bacon said:


> How does your therapist expect to "work on your biological vulnerability"?


Not sure myself. I hope we will start something on next appointment. I doubt you can actually change the biological part. So I am a bit curious what he meant. My intuition tells me it will be probably focused on unconditional self acceptance or the discussion(step by step) of my system of irrational beliefs.


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## Mr Bacon

I saw my hot therapist yesterday. Turns out she's more like 28 or so. She "rejected" me as a patient :lol

She basically told me I'm better off seeing a shrink and taking meds, because a couple short term therapies aren't going to address my chronic depression. Great. On to the next step.



sad vlad said:


> Strange answer. There is no such thing as never seen before. Cause that would mean it would be a whole new disorder.
> 
> My guess is they are not sure exactly where you are fitting because your symptoms are not obvious enough to pinpoint to a certain disorder, without a doubt. They are probably split between few possibilities.


Yes, that's probably what they mean. Good luck with your own therapist. Self-acceptance sounds hard, man. I don't know if I'll ever accept the way I am.


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## gunner21

^ you didn't turn on the bacon charm? (It worked on me)


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## kjwkjw

not good. she dont know how it is to be a boy.

I cant talk about my body, virgin and my view on girls to her. she will be scared and think im insane.

she will think that im a loser.

it must be a guy-


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## DeeperUnderstanding

My current therapist is very, very attractive. I have issues with it, but at the same time, it's sort of helping me get over the fear of talking to beautiful women.


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## Mr Bacon

gunner21 said:


> ^ you didn't turn on the bacon charm? (It worked on me)


She must've been vegan, the bacon charm proved ineffective!



kjwkjw said:


> not good. she dont know how it is to be a boy.
> 
> I cant talk about my body, virgin and my view on girls to her. she will be scared and think im insane.
> 
> she will think that im a loser.
> 
> it must be a guy-


Oh don't worry, they've probably seen a load of crazy people by now!


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## Alienated

Mr Bacon said:


> She must've been vegan, the bacon charm proved ineffective!
> 
> Maybe she's Jewish... Your really screwed then !!


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## Brandon86

Leeroy Jenkins said:


> My experience? Can't stop thinking about dirty scenarios.


LOL, I have an attractive therapist and once or twice I've walked into the room wanting to say "okay, we've only got 45 minutes, let's get down to business!" As a joke of course.

My therapist is attractive although that hasn't totally gotten in the way of therapy. She's asked me before what about my ex-girlfriend I found attractive and it was hard for me to answer. It probably would've been that way with anyone, but it was more difficult with her.


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## sebastian1

:um link to therapist's website plz?


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## sad vlad

Mr Bacon said:


> I saw my hot therapist yesterday. Turns out she's more like 28 or so. She "rejected" me as a patient :lol
> 
> She basically told me I'm better off seeing a shrink and taking meds, because a couple short term therapies aren't going to address my chronic depression. Great. On to the next step.


She was quite young. Very little experience. Maybe it's for the best. You need someone that is experienced and can see things she doesn't have an eye for, sort of speak. Besides, keep starring at her ''charms'' would have just distracted your attention.

Sending you to a psychiatrist seems strange to me. Firstly, because depression is not some untreatable mental disorder. So I doubt that was the reason. Second of all, because it was in her interest to give therapy a chance. Yes, nothing is treated with just a few short term therapies. But who said it has to be short? Did you impose some limits? Maybe something that would tell her you are difficult to work with?


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## CubeGlow

failoutboy said:


> I've never had an attractive therapist. They all have been judgmental old men.


WORD lol


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## diamondheart89

Never been to therapy but I don't like having young doctors/nurses treating me, it's weird when we're close in age and they're asking me about my sexual history or poking around trying to asses me. On the flip side, I also don't like having young patients for the same reason. The whole situation is fraught with awkwardness. 

But you put on a professional face and deal with it.


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## Woodoow

I know that. Mine is 24 years old (that's her first year), she's comprehensive and cool, but sometimes it's awkward as hell.


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## Morumot

All of my therapists have been female. No problems really.


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## lockS

I've had male and female therapists. I was able to talk about everything, so no problems there.


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## DeeperUnderstanding

Mine is actually older, probably mid-40's, but she is incredibly attractive. 

I've never had a therapist who was close to my age. The youngest they've ever been is 40's. Most have been men, though; this is the first time I have a female therapist. I'm not sure if she's as good as the guy who I had before her, but he had to drop me because he had too many patients, and referred me to her.


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## DeniseAfterAll

This is Everywhere . There is No escape . No escape .. but raw exposure .. :no


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## Persephone The Dread

I think mine is like in her early 30's or something like that, but I'm not attracted to her, as I'm not attracted to 99.9% of women.

Oh wait, and I have no experience with an opposite gender therapist.


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## CEB32

Mr Bacon said:


> Sure, the mind affects the body and vice-versa. My hypothesis is that since I've always had SA and low grade depression, for as long as I can remember, the cause is most likely biological. Many other members of my family are this way too: mom, grand parents, uncle, cousins...
> 
> Other than that, I can't think of a single reason why I'd be so F-ed up. I wasn't heavily bullied, my parents love me and wanna help me - plus they're financially at ease - I have a couple friends, I'm in a top university, I can't complain about my looks... where the hell would have the problem originated from? It boggles my mind.


Far more likely to be a mixture of diet,location and non understanding of the actual true issues in what you face. I have heard/seen people with what i would consider to be a perfect life only they are depressed and/or have anxiety and social issues.

One of them ate huge amounts of chocolate sweets and i guess what you guys would call candy, stopping all of that cured all her symptons. The sad thing is that alot of so called professionals are working on old school beliefs and education, they are not forced or required in many cases to learn about the new things being discovered and as a result fail to see simple remedies and instead focus on medication.

Not saying this is the case for you, but if it is effecting your entire family it could be something simple which gets overlooked. I havent heard of genetic anxiety, but there is a case for this with depression and its usually related to calcium


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## Mr Bacon

CEB32 said:


> Far more likely to be a mixture of diet,location and non understanding of the actual true issues in what you face. I have heard/seen people with what i would consider to be a perfect life only they are depressed and/or have anxiety and social issues.
> 
> One of them ate huge amounts of chocolate sweets and i guess what you guys would call candy, stopping all of that cured all her symptons. The sad thing is that alot of so called professionals are working on old school beliefs and education, they are not forced or required in many cases to learn about the new things being discovered and as a result fail to see simple remedies and instead focus on medication.
> 
> Not saying this is the case for you, but if it is effecting your entire family it could be something simple which gets overlooked. I havent heard of genetic anxiety, but there is a case for this with depression and its usually related to calcium


*Diet:* I have tried a ketogenic diet, a 0 carb diet, a gluten & dairy-free diet, a vegetarian diet, and I am presently on the paleo diet. None of these changes in nutrition have impacted my depression/SA.

*Location:* care to explain further?

*Other possible unknown cause:* my testosterone levels are in the normal range and my thyroid is getting tested. Once that's done, what more is left to try?


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## saganist

I had / still have a huge crush on my female therapist, who is less than 10 years older than me. I met her twice in a week. I could talk to her about pretty much anything. It was the first time I had real therapy. When I had to quit seeing her months ago, I was completely devastated. I have not had a crush like that towards anyone else. Our emotional connection was something special. I only visited her for like 3 months but it seemed like a year to me.


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## CEB32

Mr Bacon said:


> *Diet:* I have tried a ketogenic diet, a 0 carb diet, a gluten & dairy-free diet, a vegetarian diet, and I am presently on the paleo diet. None of these changes in nutrition have impacted my depression/SA.
> 
> *Location:* care to explain further?
> 
> *Other possible unknown cause:* my testosterone levels are in the normal range and my thyroid is getting tested. Once that's done, what more is left to try?


On the location side of things - pylons,substations,heavy farming. many things can effect certain peoples in different ways. Some of my symptoms get worse in certain areas. The nearer i get to the local mobile network mast is one such area. and the smell of processed wheat makes me depressed lol. Whiskey distilling, shortbread baking things like that, all have an effect on my symptoms

Something to think about if you have tried just about everything,which paleolithic diet do you refer to?


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