# Looking back



## Anxiety75 (Feb 10, 2004)

Looking back at the past is not all bad. Especially when you can find the progress you make over time. I have been reading these positive quotes that use alot of positive reinforcement. They bring up things like remembering who you were then and who you are now and to look at where one has improved. So I have been looking at where I was ten years ago and I realize I have indeed made SO much progress. Not only slowly coming out of alot of my SA but my secondary disorders. I was really a mess then. There was alot I didn't know how to do, and barely any coping skills. It just seems that over time a person changes, matures, and improves. Whether you think so or not, you will improve. It may not be that noticeable at first, but one day you'll look back and say, "I used to couldn't do that!" Now I can!" Or "Look at what I have learned!" Anyway, whether its five years or ten years, try to imagine where you were or what you have learned and accomplished over time. It feels really good to see it that way. No matter how hard life has been to you there are still accomplishments you have come to over time. And of course we never stop learning. I still have alot to learn and although I don't believe it yet, there may be things I can't do now that I will be doing 5-10 yrs from now. 
Another thing, don't compare your success to someone else. Don't think you have to do what "Mr Jones" can do or "Mrs Jones" can do. You have your own unique success. So be successful in your own way.  :banana


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## RHB (Dec 30, 2004)

Thanks for those words...very true and have made me think.


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## meggiehamilton (Nov 12, 2003)

:agree :thanks


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## Sweetangel (Jan 12, 2005)

Anxiety28 said:


> Looking back at the past is not all bad. Especially when you can find the progress you make over time. I have been reading these positive quotes that use alot of positive reinforcement. They bring up things like remembering who you were then and who you are now and to look at where one has improved. So I have been looking at where I was ten years ago and I realize I have indeed made SO much progress. Not only slowly coming out of alot of my SA but my secondary disorders. I was really a mess then. There was alot I didn't know how to do, and barely any coping skills. It just seems that over time a person changes, matures, and improves. Whether you think so or not, you will improve. It may not be that noticeable at first, but one day you'll look back and say, "I used to couldn't do that!" Now I can!" Or "Look at what I have learned!" Anyway, whether its five years or ten years, try to imagine where you were or what you have learned and accomplished over time. It feels really good to see it that way. No matter how hard life has been to you there are still accomplishments you have come to over time. And of course we never stop learning. I still have alot to learn and although I don't believe it yet, there may be things I can't do now that I will be doing 5-10 yrs from now.
> Another thing, don't compare your success to someone else. Don't think you have to do what "Mr Jones" can do or "Mrs Jones" can do. You have your own unique success. So be successful in your own way.  :banana


yeah i look 5 years back --> who is this naive little person? is that me than what am i now? i changed soooooooo much.
i'm in highschool now
i've done a lot of things but there's still a lot to learn 
i have values, i'm much smarter and i look back and things make sense and i feel better about myself and more in control of my life, i'm treating the sa i developed and i'm on the right track, there's a lot of things i wish i had but right now i'm just happy i have what i have.


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## loridee (Feb 1, 2005)

I do think that looking back is a good way to put things into perspective, if you balance the good with the bad. It's tough to do this for some people who tend to focus on the negatives.

Two years ago, I was an unresolved mess. I didn't have it all together. I forced friendships to happen, and I forced myself to be somebody I'm not. Two years is a long time to go through that confusion about my role and place in society. It was too much for me and I retreated back into the safety of my shell. Many people might think it's digression, but I think I needed to have time alone to find myself again. 

I am content right where I am...at the moment. Maybe my life will change in another two years, but if I am going to make an attempt at positive change, I will have a better strategy next time. Right now I am on a plateau where I need to rest and recuperate from the disappointment and disillusionment I had with some people. Maybe I need to lower my expectations about what friendship really is, and not to expect too much from superficial relationships. 

The past few months was a period I decided to be on my own, to have my own place away from nosy roommates. I am also away from a very dysfunctional family. And I'm thoroughly enjoying my little hideaway, this pleasant oasis that's far removed from the chaos of life.


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