# How to flirt? Advice from guys?



## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

If a girl came up to me and gave me her number, I would be incredibly flattered.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

Well thats good.... do you think youd text the person?


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

If the guy finds the girl attractive than I am sure he would. I wouldn't be so forward though, start off with just looking at him a lot and smiling when he catches you looking (then look away), it makes it obvious you are flirting and at least lets him decide if he will be available for you to approach or not (if not he might walk away or something like that), it just helps reduce any awkwardness associated with cold approaching as it gives him a chance to prepare or reject what might happen next (he might be in a relationship already for example). But that's just my opinion!


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

I don't even know.


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Well thats good.... do you think youd text the person?


I would probably say, "hey wait", as she was walking away and try to start a conversation.

But if that didn't happen I would for sure text her, yeah.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

.


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## Josefz27 (Oct 26, 2012)

I say just say some friendly-sounding comment to a guy. If he thinks your attractive, he would probably make a move talking to you now knowing you're not annoyed by him. That's probably just the way I think but it works on me.


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## edhoo (Feb 15, 2011)

If you like him, smile at him, if he does the same back just go up to him. Compliment him on something, make some small talk, and if he is responsive just give him your number. I know I'd appreciate that.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Yeah.. of course smiling is a good way to do it.. but I kinda want to be more aggressive... but not too aggressive. I mean maybe I could say something like "Youre really cute" and laugh or something when I walk away? Im not sure. Im so bad at this. Lol.


Smile, look up at him and bite your lower lip. Then just say "Hey there" or something like that.
It also helps to do it when your dressed up in your kitty costume :b


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

edhoo said:


> If you like him, smile at him, if he does the same back just go up to him. Compliment him on something, make some small talk, and if he is responsive just give him your number. I know I'd appreciate that.


Yeah... simple enough. Im just not the best with small talk lol


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

ThatOneQuietGuy said:


> Smile, look up at him and bite your lower lip. Then just say "Hey there" or something like that.
> It also helps to do it when your dressed up in your kitty costume :b


Good idea... that way I can be a little more shy too. Lol if only every day were Halloween.

Whyd you change your picture?


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

Yea I agree with Aussie, Looking and smiling is definitely 1 of the best signs to give.

Had a few women looking and smiling at me in the past few weeks in bars, and although I did move to tables closer to them, I couldnt bring myself to go over and chat.

I would like a girl to be looking and smiling at me, then if/when I go to the bar to buy another drink, would be great if she came up to the bar and stood next to me whilst she orders another drink too. Then I would make a comment like saying about how long its taking to be served, or I dunno something else


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

pete24 said:


> Yea I agree with Aussie, Looking and smiling is definitely 1 of the best signs to give.
> 
> Had a few women looking and smiling at me in the past few weeks in bars, and although I did move to tables closer to them, I couldnt bring myself to going over and chatting.
> 
> I would like a girl to be looking and smiling at me, then if/when I go to the bar to buy another drink, would be great if she came up to the bar and stood next to me whilst she orders another drink. Then I would make a comment like saying about how long its taking to be served, or I dunno something else


I wish I was old enough to go to bars lol. That makes sense though. Do you think its a good idea to think of the conversation before you talk to someone?


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Good idea... that way I can be a little more shy too. Lol if only every day were Halloween.
> 
> Whyd you change your picture?


Yeah, but then you would end up having to say more after that, or else things will start to get awkward really fast. It's best to seal the deal as quickly as you can before your nervousness takes a hold.

I changed it because people make the assumption that I am some douche that is lying about having SA. Plus I like wolves and snow.


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## LeftyFretz (Feb 12, 2011)

Honestly if a random girl walks up to me and just outright asks for my number, I'd be like piss off. A nice "hey there" and some chit chat would do the trick. Let him do the rest.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

Smiles don't work. At least for me. Ill just think oh she just being friendly.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> I wish I was old enough to go to bars lol. That makes sense though.* Do you think its a good idea to think of the conversation before you talk to someone?*


I've tried that time and time again, but conversations never go according to plan.

If your around him a lot, then you should build up a flirty report with him for a little while and see how he responds to it, then just walk up and give him your number one day.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

:b


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Thats why I just wanted to write my number and hand it to him...... then run. :b


It'll work. At least it would for me.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Yeah.. agh. The more I think about the scarier it is. I hate small talk! Lol. Thats why I just wanted to write my number and hand it to him...... then run. :b


Idk about that lol.
I had a girl come up behind me and pull me back by my shirt collar then hand me her number. I never contacted her lol.
Also she doesn't realize that she almost got her self punched :lol

It would be best for you to flirt first and then see if he seems interested. Then you can hand him your number and run


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

I kinda feel like driving there and seeing if hes working.. he was really chatty when I met him and kinda bragging lol. Man Im becoming a creeper stalker. Agh. 

*buries head in pillows*


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

ThatOneQuietGuy said:


> Idk about that lol.
> I had a girl come up behind me and pull me back by my shirt collar then hand me her number. I never contacted her lol.
> Also she doesn't realize that she almost got her self punched :lol
> 
> It would be best for you to flirt first and then see if he seems interested. Then you can hand him your number and run


Yeah... makes sense. If girls are too forward I think they look like a ****. Lol


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> I kinda feel like driving there and seeing if hes working.. he was really chatty when I met him and kinda bragging lol. Man Im becoming a creeper stalker. Agh.
> 
> *buries head in pillows*


Haha yeah, don't do that.
It sounds like you have a serious crush on this dude?


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Yeah... makes sense. If girls are too forward I think they look like a ****. Lol


Not always, I just think you'll have a better chance if you give him hints and then see if he gives them back. If he is really chatty and confident he will make his interest in you obvious.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

ThatOneQuietGuy said:


> Haha yeah, don't do that.
> It sounds like you have a serious crush on this dude?


Lol... maybe. Ive seen him a couple times, and I did talk to him once but I didnt say much. He did a lot of talking. Man I feel like a creepy loser.


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## edhoo (Feb 15, 2011)

KelsKels said:


> I wish I was old enough to go to bars lol. That makes sense though. Do you think its a good idea to think of the conversation before you talk to someone?


Thats never worked for me, it always sounds too scripted and unnatural.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Lol... maybe. Ive seen him a couple times, and I did talk to him once but I didnt say much. He did a lot of talking. *Man I feel like a creepy loser. *


Don't let those thoughts creep in, there not true.

I doubt you would have any problem attracting him, don't over complicate it in your mind. It's actually all very simple if you really think about it.


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## Thix (Jul 14, 2012)

How did you end up in a conversation with him the first time? Maybe we can go from there.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

Thix said:


> How did you end up in a conversation with him the first time? Maybe we can go from there.


Buying a game.. he was kinda bragging that he already played the series and got all the achievements. He was real chatty! I guess I could bring it up again if I ever see him.


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## elvin jones (Dec 12, 2011)

ThatOneQuietGuy said:


> It's actually all very simple if you really think about it.


The hardest things in life are simple on paper.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

elvin jones said:


> The hardest things in life are simple on paper.


The complications come later on :/


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## elvin jones (Dec 12, 2011)

ThatOneQuietGuy said:


> The complications come later on :/


Life is one huge complication.



KelsKels said:


> I like guys who arent intimidating!


What would be considered as intimidating?


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## evginmubutu (Sep 12, 2011)

i considered posting a thread like this - 'how do i flirt'? then the realization came to me that the very fact i am asking probably means i am just afraid of rejection. if *you* feel it, do it, nobody is gonna be feeling this for you!


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## NeveS (Sep 3, 2011)

KelsKels said:


> Yeah.. agh. The more I think about the scarier it is. I hate small talk! Lol. Thats why I just wanted to write my number and hand it to him...... then run. :b


'Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy...'


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

NeveS said:


> 'Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy...'


:clap bahaha


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

KelsKels said:


> Im really not good at it. At all. Im so awkward! Im trying to break out of my shell though and just not care what people think, and be kinda crazy. But I dont know how to flirt with a guy. I kinda want to just give them my number or something and see what happens. But I feel like thats soooo forward and maybe kinda creepy. And what if theyre like EW dont talk to me? Lol. I just want to know maybe what you guys think would be good and bad.
> 
> I like guys who arent intimidating, maybe on the nerdy side lol. I mean my ex is a DM. I kinda like this guy who works in the game section at Walmart... but I havent seen him recently. Plus Im not a huge gamer... so idk!


It's not that hard... really... just do what this girl does at 1:22

too bad youtube does not have the complete scene


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## awkwardsilent (Jun 14, 2012)

Hey no I really don't know how to flirt either it just doesn't come naturally. I think because I've always known that guys wouldn't be flattered by attention from a girl like me I never tried? I notice my prettier friends flirt really well not just because they are pretty but they developed the skills for it. I don't even know if its concious their body language and even their tone of voice change around men. I notice these things, esp when its on the phone the change from normal voice (how they talk to one of us gals, vs a boyfriend or vs even a guy they swear they don't like but are friends with... lol).


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## Kwtrader (Oct 10, 2007)

KelsKels said:


> Buying a game.. he was kinda bragging that he already played the series and got all the achievements. He was real chatty! I guess I could bring it up again if I ever see him.


you could be like could u give me your e-mail address(or number) so if i need help in parts of the game i can ask you? or something like that.


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## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

Finally some girl who wants to take action and not just sit there, do nothing, and expect from the guys to guess all that she is thinking.


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## squall78 (Feb 17, 2012)

Start a normal conversation, and then work in some comments about already being together. It seems to drive guys/girls crazy when somebody we are talking to is pretending to be in a relationship.

For women it's a bit different in terms of how to go about it, but usually breaking the ice with a statement or a question is enough for the guy to get the hint and get started on his interest in you. We all fear the initial fear of getting to know someone, so if you make it easy on the other person, then they will definitely open to you.


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## Thix (Jul 14, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Buying a game.. he was kinda bragging that he already played the series and got all the achievements. He was real chatty! I guess I could bring it up again if I ever see him.


Perfect! Just start talking to him about the game. If he was super talkative he really liked the game or you or both. "Hey, you sold me (whatever). I liked (this). I didn't like (that). What did you think about (that one part where the thing happened)?" After a while tell him you need to go, but he seems pretty cool, so would he maybe want to go (insert some activity here).

Just out of curiosity, what game didja buy?


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## nautilus (Aug 21, 2012)

Safeway said:


> you could be like could u give me your e-mail address(or number) so if i need help in parts of the game i can ask you? or something like that.


Yes. Or even better, invite him to play one of the games with you. If he seems interested, exchange contact info. Having an excuse to continue to interact can make things seem more natural. Probably would be more effective if you've built up some rapport first, as others have said. But don't worry if you don't know how to build up the perfect amount of rapport; just work with your current capabilities, use what you _do_ know, and if it's still awkward, so what. Every time you push yourself outside your comfort zone, you add to the list of things you know you can do (regardless of the results).



KelsKels said:


> I wish I was old enough to go to bars lol. That makes sense though. Do you think its a good idea to think of the conversation before you talk to someone?


Thinking up conversation starters can be helpful. But it's usually best to improvise from there (scary, I know). Sometimes I think up things I can ask or mention if they come up, but it only works occasionally; I have to be willing to let them go if it doesn't flow with the conversation. The only other thing you might be able to plan is an exit line, which can be helpful if you want to end the conversation while it's still going well.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

Yeah I'm not even gonna lie.. all this has really freaked me out. I don't know if I want to do it any more.


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Yeah I'm not even gonna lie.. all this has really freaked me out. I don't know if I want to do it any more.


Yeah, I wouldn't bother if I were you.

I still think the handing over of a phone number is your best bet.


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## Thix (Jul 14, 2012)

KelsKels said:


> Yeah I'm not even gonna lie.. all this has really freaked me out. I don't know if I want to do it any more.


Most of my crushes end up burning out in a similar manner. I wear myself out worrying about too much stuff and just lose steam.

I think talking about the game gives you a pretty good excuse to start a conversation, so I hope you end up changing your mind. Either way, good luck. :hug


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

Thix said:


> Most of my crushes end up burning out in a similar manner. I wear myself out worrying about too much stuff and just lose steam.


Aw yeah thats how I feel.. I just cant stop worrying now! I was more confident before.. now I just feel like chickening out.


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## falling down (Oct 17, 2011)




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## squall78 (Feb 17, 2012)

So did you do it? Give us the details!


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## shammie (Oct 31, 2012)

When you see him again, start talking about the game you bought. "Hey, how did you get past the 'blah'" or "What'd you think of level 'blah'"

If he remembers you straight from the off, it's a good sign.


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## John316C (May 1, 2011)

sdfsdf


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## MNM (Oct 3, 2012)

I gave a guy my number once... just as a kind gesture.... and he was quite pissed about it... so just depends on the person. I'll never do it again though


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## cloister2 (Sep 2, 2011)

I may not be much help because nothing has ever worked on me. I don't like it when girls are too forward but then I never make the first move either. I 2nd the make eye contact/smile thing. Do it more than once. It's a sure sign you like him. Then leave it up to him and he'll make a move... maybe. This may be one of those downside of being female.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

squall78 said:


> So did you do it? Give us the details!


No I haven't even tried. I have no reason to go to the area he works, and it'd be weird to just show up.. Meh. I've lost my confidence. I don't think I'm going to do it any more.


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## nautilus (Aug 21, 2012)

cloister2 said:


> Then leave it up to him and he'll make a move... maybe. This may be one of those downside of being female.


Pfft. This is exactly why I decided to start taking my life into my own hands instead of waiting around helplessly. Society may have it's standards, that doesn't mean I have to follow them. I figure if a guy doesn't like women who can show a bit of initiative, he's not someone I'd want to date anyway. Of course, if he turns me down because he's simply not interested in _me_, I can respect that 

Edit: @KelsKels Making your intentions clear to someone is certainly not an easy task, especially when done directly. I think I only began to find the courage to do so when I started caring more about having faith in my own abilities than I did about the actual outcome of the situation. I still have a loooong way to go before I can successfully flirt with someone and start a relationship, but I will say that I've become happier and more confident since the first time I put myself out there and asked someone out. And yes, I was terrified and extremely awkward, and it hurt to get rejected. But I consider it one of the best decisions I've ever made.

I hope you give yourself another chance, even if it's a smaller, less intimidating goal to start out with. Just look at how many of us believe you can do it!


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## larmo8 (Sep 19, 2012)

Smile, make eye contact, laugh at his jokes (even if they aren't funny), tease him, ask him questions, and ASK IF HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND. Asking him that does two things -- it reveals to you if he is single, and you reveal yourself to him that you are very likely interested. If he finds you attractive, then you're golden.


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## Elad (Dec 6, 2009)

Talk, seem interested in what they say, eye contact, compliments, smiling.

^ just do the basics, don't make things more complex than they have to be. 

and you don't need to act like half the posts in this thread, unless you're in a competition for Flavor Flav or Bret Michaels.


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## Rixy (Oct 4, 2009)

First off, this thread has forced Carly Rae Jepsen into my head for like...5 minutes.



MNM said:


> I gave a guy my number once... just as a kind gesture.... and he was quite pissed about it... so just depends on the person. I'll never do it again though


Don't be too upset, that guy sounds like a jerk. Also, I'm not sure "handing out numbers" happens much over here in Engurland. At least I've never seen it happen. From what I've seen it's usually contact through Facebook first and then numbers when stuff gets personal. Then again I am romantically and sexually inept :um

If we're still giving advice here, I'd recommend light physical contact. Especially after a joke or something. A light touch on the arm or shoulder after going _"Teeheehee". _(Yes, that is my best girl impression. Leave me alone.)


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## litchee (May 8, 2007)

larmo8 said:


> Smile, make eye contact, *laugh at his jokes (even if they aren't funny)*, tease him, ask him questions, and ASK IF HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND. Asking him that does two things -- it reveals to you if he is single, and you reveal yourself to him that you are very likely interested. If he finds you attractive, then you're golden.





nster said:


> sure smiling is good, but HUGE eye contact and touch! Also a few hints help
> 
> him: why did the chicken cross the road?
> you: idk
> ...


Really? Do you guys really like it if a girl laughs at something that isn't funny? :// Doesn't it make the girl seem kind of like an airhead that is just trying to please the men?


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## larmo8 (Sep 19, 2012)

litchee said:


> Really? Do you guys really like it if a girl laughs at something that isn't funny? :// Doesn't it make the girl seem kind of like an airhead that is just trying to please the men?


Obviously, there can be more subtlety involved that she will have to learn, just like a guy needs to learn how to flirt -- but yes, if a girl did those things to me, and I was attracted to her, then it would increase the attraction ten-fold (at least for me).

Also, if the guy is shy then subtlety isn't even necessary or recommend. Be blunt. And, again, asking if he has a girlfriend is a great signal that will seal the deal, given that you have been previously flirting with him.


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## cousin corona (Jun 13, 2011)

flash him


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## Thix (Jul 14, 2012)

litchee said:


> Really? Do you guys really like it if a girl laughs at something that isn't funny? :// Doesn't it make the girl seem kind of like an airhead that is just trying to please the men?


Yea, to me that'd just make you seem a bit pathetic if you laughed overly enthusiastically at something that was obviously not funny.


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## Rixy (Oct 4, 2009)

Well it depends on the degree of laughter I guess. If you're wailing high pitched Mickey Mouse style howling then yeah that is overkill. A white lie chuckle isn't so bad though.


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## larmo8 (Sep 19, 2012)

Rixy said:


> Well it depends on the degree of laughter I guess. If you're wailing high pitched Mickey Mouse style howling then yeah that is overkill. A white lie chuckle isn't so bad though.


Again, subtlety. Like everything else, it's not what but how.


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## mario8 (Oct 7, 2012)

Well this tricks usually works: wear something nice to work (if he`s not blind, that`s something he will notice, or at least think about), start up a conversation (maybe find out what he likes to do, what are his plans for the week end, etc), try to revolve the conversation so that you will also share a little about yourself (let him see that your interested in him getting to know you), keep things casual and funny enough, and than wait for it. If he doesn't ask you out himself, than ask him out yourself. It doesn't have to be a "date", date. You can also just grab a coffee together, and work your way up from there. There`s no shame in that. And in case your wondering, no, fakes laughs and friendly smiles won`t cut it. Keep it nice, casual, polite, simple, honest and inviting. Also. Another important tip - touching him casually or playing around with him physically when he says a joke, may do wonders for the soul 

Simply put: be yourself. Your a girl and ill bet that you don`t look bad - You breathing oxygen does half the work XD - this should be a no brainer even if you lack in confidence. Guys are more than happy when women also make a move.


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