# I'm afraid to set goals



## comfort (May 31, 2009)

I don't want to set goals because I don't believe I can achieve them. For example, I'd love to be able to ask a girl out, but I don't think I'll be able to do it. I wish I could.


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

I'd suggest starting out with very small goals. You don't need to go straight for asking a girl out. 

Once you've achieved some small successes, and hopefully have built a bit more confidence, you could gradually work your way up to the bigger ones.

(easier said than done, I know!)


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## comfort (May 31, 2009)

Yeah I guess I just háček a


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## Watercoulour (Jul 24, 2011)

Start small.
Just say "i will talk to this girl today" etc etc and build up from there :3


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## keyla965 (Jan 13, 2011)

yea im the same way. I mean wats the point in setting a goal when you know for a fact you dont have the guts to achieve them ?? thats why i stay away from goals. Im too lazy plus im a procrastinator which are two of the most horrible quaulities to have in general


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## sherbert (Jun 24, 2005)

comfort said:


> I don't want to set goals because I don't believe I can achieve them. For example, I'd love to be able to ask a girl out, but I don't think I'll be able to do it. I wish I could.


see, I don't buy into the concept that we cant achieve goals. I think it's that we don't put forth the energy because that requires more effort and responsibility. That not saying we're lazy though. I know from personal experience when you feel emotionally frail, it's hard to truly _want _to take on more challenges. One of the main ways I avoid a new challenge is by focusing on really tough goals instead of the small attainable ones.

If you're not on board with this concept, let me elaborate more with some real-life examples. When I was considering going back to school, I kept highlighting the fact I didn't know what career path to follow. 
So instead of just focusing _on going_ and making incremental efforts, I was at an impasse. I came to the realization that there were/are many reasons why I wanted to go to school, more than just finding a career. So I took one course of interest and one that I needed credits for. Does it solve my main goal? Not really, but it's step in the right direction. Now that I know I can handle classes, I feel more confident exploring other paths. It's still uncomfortable, but it's a start.

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.


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