# Over 24 and living with your parents



## latin_maverick (May 15, 2007)

I would guess this happens to many of us with SA. How many of you are over 24 years old and still living with their parents?

How do you tell it to somebody you just met? You canlt hide it forever, so you need to tell him/her at some time, right?

Some conversations I have go like this:

"Oh, so you live in ________. That must be nice!"

"Yes, I love it there."

"And you live there all by yourself?"

"umm... I live with my parents actually..."

"oh ok (weird look).... what? oh they are calling me... I gotta go...."


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

I am on my own, but I can't see not dating a girl because she lived at home. Especially without her telling me why. I'm an open-minded person. I guess a lot of women might feel otherwise, but oh well. She should get to know you and not judge right off the bat. Not all women are as you described.


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## Silverwater (Dec 2, 2007)

Many of my single girl pals in their 20s and 30s live at home. It's just easier that way and they get to save money. Maybe you can tell women that you are living with your parents right now in order to save money to buy a nice house or something.


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## LonelyEnigma (Jan 7, 2007)

I still live at home and I’m 26. I deal with it by avoiding people as much as possible. I know that no one would want to date a man my age that still lives with his parents so I don’t ever show an interest in people. My social anxiety is quite severe so I wouldn’t be able to connect with people anyways. My mother and father are the only people I know. If I didn’t live with them, I would be completely alone. I’ve live on my own before; it’s quite boring and lonely. Having no friends and no girlfriend is hard enough. I get along with my parents and pay my own way, so I don’t really see much reason to abandon the only people who’ve ever cared about me. 

I’ve been a loser for so long now that pride is not much of a concern for me. People will think I’m weird no matter where I live. People think I’m weird now because I live with my parents, but when I use to live on my own people thought I was weird because they never saw friends or girls visiting my apartment, and I always avoided invitations to go to social gatherings. Nearly everybody in my parents’ community is old, so I don’t have to worry about peers judging me or peers asking me to go places. 

If people ask me why I still live at home, I tell them it is because I’m a college student and can’t afford to pay rent on an apartment. If for some strange reason, a lovely lady I had a crush on showed a genuine interest in me, I would let her know that even though I live with my parents, I would move out for her, and I would use my own money to pay for some or all the rent.


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

Silverwater said:


> Many of my single girl pals in their 20s and 30s live at home. It's just easier that way and they get to save money. Maybe you can tell women that you are living with your parents right now in order to save money to buy a nice house or something.


Yeah for real, you can save a good chuck of change living at home.


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## FreeSoul (Jan 1, 2006)

Yeah, I still do. 
I'd like to get a place of my own, but I want to finish college first.


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## RedRascal (Dec 7, 2007)

i will be in due time


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## latin_maverick (May 15, 2007)

What if I'm living with parents not because of necessity, but because I want to. Let's say I make six figures per year and I own the place where me and my parents live.

Would that make me less of a loser?

What do the girls in the forum think?


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## markx (Dec 22, 2007)

I still live with my parents. I left school at 18 and went straight into my father's business with my two older brothers. Even now, 20-odd years later we're all getting well below the minimum wage so there's no way any of us could afford to move out.

Not having your own space is yet another barrier to having a relationship... "Hey, do you want to come back to my _car_ for a coffee..?" :um


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## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

24 years and 8 months in the same house!! WOO-HOO!!


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## mismac (Oct 27, 2005)

srschirm said:


> Yeah for real, you can save a good chuck of change living at home.


Yup. Renting is a waste of money. If you can live at home, live at home. I only moved out (at 25) because I couldn't stand my family anymore. But I've no problem moving back if I *have* to. There's no shame!


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## Polar (Dec 16, 2006)

I'm 24, and "sort of" still live with my parents. They have this house with a separate apartment connected to it, which I currently live in. It has its own entrance, and includes a hallway, living room, kitchen, bathroom and bedroom, and the apartment is certainly big enough for me. They let me rent this place for free. My parents are too nice...


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## Prism (Dec 17, 2004)

i know plenty of non-SA people who live with (a) parent/parents. So it's not just an sa thing. Like other posters said, one can save a lot of money doing it this way. My problem is that I don't get along great with my mom and she also wants to start charging me rent when I graduate from college. That might force me out of the house.


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

im soon to be 22 and living at home, however i have plans to move out for my first time this summer and live with my gf in my own condo.


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## PGVan (May 22, 2004)

I'll be 24 in April, and I have no plans to move out of my dad's house. I simply cannot afford another option. I pay him probably at least a third of what I would living anywhere else. He knows I'm an adult and lets me do as I please....if I only knew how to "do as I please".


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

srschirm said:


> Silverwater said:
> 
> 
> > Many of my single girl pals in their 20s and 30s live at home. It's just easier that way and they get to save money. Maybe you can tell women that you are living with your parents right now in order to save money to buy a nice house or something.
> ...


No kidding. I've been living on my own since July 1, but I could save SOOOOOO much more money if I still lived with my parents. There were simply no jobs in my hometown though.

Technically I lived away from my parents for college as well.


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## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

I'm 27 and live with Mommy and Daddy.

I tell people I have two roommates.


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## BeNice (Jan 2, 2004)

Maybe sometimes you just have to lie, or just not care... or a combination of the two.


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## Futures (Aug 27, 2005)

I'm almost 27 and still live at home. I lived on my own during college and I enjoyed it very much, but I was getting a free ride financially from my parents at the time. If I moved out now, everything would be coming out of my wallet. 

The way I see it is should I really pay out $1,500+ a month just so I can have the luxury of telling people that I no longer live at home? It's not like I go anywhere or do anything that warrants needing my own place. Girls and dating are pretty much just a pipe dream to me. It will never happen, so I don't really need to impress them either.

I'm just getting started in my career and I'm not making that much money. I don't think eating Raman for dinner is worth it just to prove a point to people that never gave a **** about my social status in the first place.

I mean don't get me wrong. I really do want to move out. I'm just being wise about everything. By staying home for a couple years after college, I'm saving money like nobody's business! In another year, I'll have enough money saved up for a nice down payment on condo or something. At that point, I hope to move out.


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## littlesongbird (Jan 20, 2008)

*---*

---


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

littlesongbird said:


> I am 24 and live with my parents. I personally don't care. It's the least of my worries what someone thinks about that. I am more concerned what they are gonna think of me and my anxiety. It's just a different lifestyle...I just think if someone really liked you, that really wouldn't be an issue. It just kinda sucks cuz I don't have a car either. So I feel really stuck at times.


That was me for over a year after I graduated from college. I lived with my parents in our small hometown, and the only time I ever left the house was if I went out to eat with my parents or went to my sister's house to babysit my toddler nephew.

It wasn't a huge problem at first, but it really started to wear on my psyche over months, and I thought I was really about to spiral out of control when I finally got a job interview from a decent place.

I have no idea where I'd be if I didn't get my job and moved away. I might have tried to illegally obtain anti-depressant or anti-anxiety drugs due to a fear of telling my parents about my struggles or something. Ugh, I don't even want to think about it.


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## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

I'm 27 and live with Mommy and Daddy.

I tell people I have two roommates.

What a smart idea! I'm 29. I live with my mom and my sis full time. My niece half time and my dad comes home to live once a month. So I have 3-4 Roomates. 

I tell people that I live at home in order to keep my mom company since my dad works out of town.


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## ericj (Jun 20, 2007)

I did until April of last year. Though there were a few stints on my own, it was rare and fleeting.

Then, once I got out, I ended up hosting my mother, sister, and grandfather for a number of months.

Of course, I am very alone. I don't know anyone here and it's hard, but it's all I have. The cost of housing is extremely high and everything else is expensive, but I'm making it. Oddly, I don't feel very independent as I did when I first came here and lived in a hotel, then when I moved in here on my own. Maybe that feeling will come back once I move somewhere else that is small enough to avoid family ever coming to live with me again. It'll just be me and BC.


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

I wonder how many people actually care whether someone lives with their parents (thinks it's bad or unacceptable in some weird way). It doesn't seem like a big deal if someone lives with their parents to most people here, including myself.


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## Nae (Nov 10, 2003)

My brother is 33 and up until a couple months ago was living at home. The woman he had been dating didn't seem to mind and now it looks like he has moved in with her (she was apparently living alone). As for me, I am 22 an d live at home but I have bigger obstacles than that fact when it comes to dating. 

It is expensive to live in my state so it is no surprise many people still live with their parents.


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## luciano (Jun 3, 2004)

I don't think its a big deal. I just started seeing a girl and she told me she lives with her parents on the first date. I never gave it a second thought. If the person is truly interested in you as a person, where you live, what you drive, etc. shouldn't matter. Good Luck


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## Whimsy (Mar 16, 2006)

I still live at home and I'm almost 22. In this city the rent is impossible. Next fall I'll begin graduate school the my stipend is not enough to cover rent and living expenses. I'd rather save my money! That school is draconian enough with their tuition and fees I'm not giving them their fellowship money back! 

My parents don't mind and they prefer that I stay at home. Its not a big deal. I don't mind if Im seeing a guy who lives at home. Its so normal here that I never give it a second thought.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

ardrum said:


> I wonder how many people actually care whether someone lives with their parents (thinks it's bad or unacceptable in some weird way). It doesn't seem like a big deal if someone lives with their parents to most people here, including myself.


really? its bad here and in cali. i dont know why. i have a cousin who is married and are having financial problems. my disabled uncle is paying thier $1200 mortage because they cant afford it. i mean whats the point?


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## edw13185 (Jan 23, 2008)

I have my own apartment at the moment, but I'm going to move back home with my parents when my lease is up. I plan on going to medical school, so I'd rather live with them while I finish up my undergraduate degree and go into med school with no debt. 

It doesn't matter to me what other people think, but I can't say that I've ever thought less of anyone who lived with his/her parents. It's none of my business who a person lives with, and I think it's great if people have a good enough relationship with their parents to continue living with them.


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

I'm 22 and living with my parents. I still have at least three years of college, so its likely that I will be over 24 when and if I leave. I only really want to leave if I can get a house.


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

edw13185 said:


> I have my own apartment at the moment, but I'm going to move back home with my parents when my lease is up. I plan on going to medical school, so I'd rather live with them while I finish up my undergraduate degree and go into med school with no debt.
> 
> It doesn't matter to me what other people think, but I can't say that I've ever thought less of anyone who lived with his/her parents. It's none of my business who a person lives with, and I think it's great if people have a good enough relationship with their parents to continue living with them.


Well put.


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## AdamCanada (Dec 6, 2003)

i was on my own for 2 years(im 23 years old), had to move back home after two roomates bailed on me. Both had a good reason but i can't pay rent on my own. Im still in college.

I hate it at home. first chance i get im outta here. the grass was definatly greener, i knew when i had my own place and i really know now.


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## opinion_m (Feb 15, 2008)

I still do (27). But its bc I worked alot over the yrs to pay for college & a new car. Then I couldn't decide on a major. Now I've decided & have been saving money for a house too.
I was doing well w my anxiety but had a relapse bc of a bad relationship I got into. So... I ended up quitting my job but still going to college.
I know its horrible how judgemental ppl can be when it comes to this subject. But at least I can say "I'm debt free" and soon enough I will have my own place, plus a career. So it will pay off.


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## Dudleyville (Mar 25, 2007)

Living with my parents has been very financially good to me.


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

I'd be rich if I lived with my parents. I just didn't psychologically hold up too well though in that situation (lived with them for a year after graduating from college).


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

ardrum said:


> I'd be rich if I lived with my parents. I just didn't psychologically hold up too well though in that situation (lived with them for a year after graduating from college).


Wow, this sounds a lot like me.


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

srschirm said:


> ardrum said:
> 
> 
> > I'd be rich if I lived with my parents. I just didn't psychologically hold up too well though in that situation (lived with them for a year after graduating from college).
> ...


It sounds like a lot of other people I knew who recently graduated. It's pretty common these days to live with your parents for at least a short while after college.


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## watashi (Feb 6, 2008)

I still live with my parents, don't have a good job to support myself yet. I guess, it is kind of weird, not a terrible thing though. Certainly wouldn't judge a person based on that fact.


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## gothsweetchikie (Mar 22, 2007)

This April I'll be 24 and still living with parents. I don't think it sounds all that bad since I know ppl in their 30s who still live with their parents and they don't even have SA.


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