# Do you hate being called sir or ma'am



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

It doesn't happen regularly fortunately, but on a couple of occasions someone will address me as sir. Maybe, I haven't dealt well with this aging thing, but it catches me off-balance when it occurs. When did you figure out you weren't no longer considered a kid in other peoples' eyes?


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

I don't think I've ever heard of any guy complain about being called Sir. Now ma'am is a very different story. Age is a HUGE thing to a lot of ladies and the transition from miss to ma'am is not pleasing to many of them from what I've seen.

Men face no such transition. You're a sir at 20 or 90.

I personally love to be addressed by the title of Dr., using it on all credit cards that request a prefix and all correspondence with elected officials. It appears to command more respect. Chase asked me if I wanted that prefix listed on my checking account that I opened with them a couple months ago -- "Yes!" was my instant reply. I like the status.


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## Pam (Feb 14, 2009)

I hated being called "Ma'am" for about the first 5 years. Now i'm too old to care, lol! At least they are acknowledging my existence and I take it as they are trying to show some kind of respect toward me for being older. I assume that's what it is, anyway.


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## OregonMommy (Mar 3, 2010)

I usually don't like it. It makes me feel old. But, when I think about it, I wouldn't like to be called 'Miss' because it is for some one really young.
I'm starting to get used to it, and as it's more about respect than about age.


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## AK32 (Sep 2, 2010)

I don't mind being called ma'am, I just don't feel old enough to be a ma'am.


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## CeilingStarer (Dec 29, 2009)

I really feel uncomfortable when an older guy at a store calls me "sir." I never call anyone sir, usually just "mate" ... but I guess that only works in Australia & the UK.


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## lostinlife (Jun 2, 2010)

I'm neutral about being called ma'am. It amused me where I used to work though. People always think I'm older before they meet me and do the double take when they meet me in person. I think I look too young in person so ma'am usually indicates people will take me more seriously. Ma'am is much more preferable to me than "honey" or "sweetie" or any of those other endearments that people reserve for those who they think are young or naive.


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## Paul (Sep 26, 2005)

Yes, I hate being called ma'am. Being called sir just feels weirdly over-polite, I could see them saying it to a 16 year old so it's not really about age.


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## Pam (Feb 14, 2009)

CeilingStarer said:


> I really feel uncomfortable when an older guy at a store calls me "sir." I never call anyone sir, usually just "mate" ... but I guess that only works in Australia & the UK.


Oh yeah, if you were in the US and called another guy "mate" WITHOUT your Australian accent, it would be taken wrong! Lol!


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## Pam (Feb 14, 2009)

Recently I was called "hon" by a much younger and good-looking guy ringing me up at the store....I LOVE that! :teeth


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

Not many people use them here. I think something like that's only happened to me once. Most people assume I am a decade younger, which is preferable because it helps excuse much of my social naivety.


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

CeilingStarer said:


> I really feel uncomfortable when an older guy at a store calls me "sir." I never call anyone sir, usually just "mate" ... but I guess that only works in Australia & the UK.


Yeah, "mate" is one of those words simply never used in America unless referring to your spouse.

No man in America will every say "I'm going to the pub with my mates," as to us a mate is someone you mate with.:lol

Such wording easily gives away Brits & Aussies. Those from non-English speaking countries are often very hard to pick out as they all learn American English, such that they'd say "I'm going to the bar with my friends."


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

As I recall Germans have their own miss vs ma'am problem, with frau vs fraulein. At some point a German female is called a frau even if she isn't married. No doubt single German women who think they're still young get quite upset when they're first called frau, being tossed in the same category as some old haus frau with 6 kids.


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## melissa75 (Feb 16, 2010)

It's common to say ma'am and sir where I live, so it doesn't offend me. Although, I've tried to not say it as much anymore as it doesn't seem to be used as frequently as when I was a kid. We would get in trouble in school for not saying it...just like we would for not saying "please" and "thank you".

It is a little annoying, however, when a waitress uses a term of endearment when I've questioned her incorrect description of an item on the menu. Example: I ask if the empanadas come with queso. She says yes, they do. I get the empanadas without queso. So, I tell her I need the queso still. She says they don't come with queso, "sweetie". Of course, I tell her she said they came with queso but, either way, please bring out the queso. She looks at me in confusion...lol.


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## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

I sometimes get call called hon and sweetie by people. I always want to say "hey, pooh bear", "lovey dovey" or some other term of endearment, but I end up chickening out.


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## demureCat (Jun 17, 2010)

Having worked around the military, I'm confortable with sir and ma'am for everyone of higher status. For women in general I use Ms (sounds like mz) to avoid Mrs or Miss (whether I know or not if she is married).

I have to admit I'm not in many situations where I get called sir. I can't recall the last time but it must have been at a store with a young clerk.

When I was traveling in California and addressed as 'dude' by the hotel clerk, that made me double-take and smile. But the hotel _*was* _near the beach.


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## housebunny (Oct 22, 2010)

boy, do i!


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## pumpkinspice (Aug 8, 2010)

I've only gotten called Ma'am on a few occasions and it was always by someone much younger. Yeah I'm not fond of it at all. I'd actually rather be called "sweetie" or "hon".


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

If they're teens, it's okay - better than some of the names I have heard.


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## 2Talkative (Nov 1, 2007)

People started calling me sir in my early 20's. Then again I'm bigger than most people so they should call me Sir.


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

I don't mind ma'am or miss at all. It's what I would expect from people I don't know, and that is what I would call them too.

Hun or Sweetie or anything like that, I do get offended at that.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

Whenever someone in a store calls me ma'am, I say sir or ma'am back.


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## LALoner (Dec 3, 2008)

I hate being called sir. It has nothing to do with feeling old, that didn't even occur to me until I read this thread. I also won't call anyone else sir.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

No, I don't mind sir at all.

I would be offended at ma'am, though. Mostly because I'm not a woman. :lol


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## Still Waters (Sep 18, 2008)

It still retains a bit of shock for me-but not as much as it once did. On a side note,I kind of like the Hun,Sweetie stuff.- I look girly and sweet so I take it as a bit of a compliment.


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## nobodyuknow (Aug 31, 2008)

I got called sir the other day in a store. I don't think it would bother me if I was a guy. Maybe I look mannish? I'm not particularly attractive, but I didn't know it was that bad. 

Ma'am kind of sucks because it makes me feel like I look old and matronly. I don't get called that often though because people usually think I am younger than I am. (I think that has more to do with looking lost and out of place though.)

I used to get called sweetheart at work all the time. ('My sweetheart is going to package my bacon for me.' Creepy!!!) I was the lone girl and I worked with mostly older guys. It became a joke with the people I worked with and they would call me 'dear' all the time after that as a joke. One guy my age would always ask me if it made me throw up in my mouth. Kind of, but it mostly served as a warning that there was a ****ty job for me to do and nobody else was enough of a pushover to get stuck with it. 

I feel weird when I get called cutesy pet names. I kind of wonder what I am being buttered up for. One guy called me muffin all the time when I talked to him online and I really didn't know what to make of that. Especially since he was a huge dickhead irl.


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## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

I'm only 26--hope you guys don't mind me posting in your thread.

Ma'am just started for me. It's kind of surprising; I don't think I look like a ma'am. It's better than hun, though. I wanted to metaphorically strangle every single 16-year-old customer who called me hun at my old job. And of course, it is better than sir, but even sir is better than, "You look like a dude," which, I'm sad to say, I have been told more than once.


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## tommyboy (Nov 21, 2010)

Being called Sir is better than "dude", "mister" or "hey you".


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## low (Sep 27, 2009)

I don't mind. I think people tend to lack respect and common courtesy these days in fact.


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## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

I feels weird and fake. I don't hate it though.


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## sansd (Mar 22, 2006)

I think a lot of people don't think of "ma'am" as being reserved for older women. People have been calling me "ma'am" since I was sixteen, and I'm usually thought to be younger than I am. I don't think I've ever heard much of "miss". It does make me uncomfortable, though.


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## chicagogirl3 (Aug 30, 2011)

Not at all. I would much rather be called "ma'am" (or even "miss") than the usual " sweetie" or "hun" I usually get due to my childish appearance. I'm 25 and look about 13-16. I'm sorry, but being called child endearments by complete strangers as an adult is creepy and annoying, even if they mean well.


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*Only once*

by schoolgirls with their mum

I was stressed in a suit on my way across town to an interview last year

They seemed to show respect by saying "Sir?"

That wasn't mockery for once. I liked it

I remember an important yacht journey with our maths teacher who organised dinghy racing at school. When we started he said don't call him "sir" any more. Call me Geoff. I liked it. He told me to make coffees onboard. I said I'd never made any coffee. He said "it's about time you do, then" I like pleasant people

My school friends called my mum 'my old dear'
to me, not to her

Years ago at my first school, when my dad met me at the minibus, they said 'that's not your dad! He's your granddad'

It's a huge damage to life when your parents are grandparent age (55 at my birth)

I saw my friends' parents as really young - sexy mum was such a bombshell to me


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

I don't mind if they call me "sir".


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## typemismatch (May 30, 2012)

I always find it really weird watching an American tv show and someone will say sir or ma'am. It's so polite. Does it actually happen in real life?


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## riderless (Jul 21, 2013)

Mr Riderless to you sir.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

I hate "Boss" the most, and I get it an awful lot when working with people of Asian descent (mostly Filipino). I am NOT their boss and I constantly remind them that they are on the same professional level as I am, I am not a superior to them in any way shape or form, however it seems almost ingrained in their culture to refer to Caucasians this way.


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## riderless (Jul 21, 2013)

AussiePea said:


> I hate "Boss" the most, and I get it an awful lot when working with people of Asian descent (mostly Filipino). I am NOT their boss and I constantly remind them that they are on the same professional level as I am, I am not a superior to them in any way shape or form, however it seems almost ingrained in their culture to refer to Caucasians this way.


 Hope they're not being sarcastic or maybe it's a good thing. I dunno.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

riderless said:


> Hope they're not being sarcastic or maybe it's a good thing. I dunno.


Nah it's cultural, I've experienced it each time I have gone back to those areas of the world.


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## cloister2 (Sep 2, 2011)

I am called sir constantly, sometimes 5 times in one minute. This only started happened to me a couple of years ago. I prefer dude, man, or @##@head. Being constantly called sir I am sure to become desensitized to it sooner or later, so I do nothing to retaliate. It really makes me wish I could get my @#[email protected] in order because I feel like a 10 year old trapped in a sir's body.


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