# Coming back to you guys after beating Social Anxiety



## normalsucksbutsodoesSA (Apr 2, 2015)

Hey guys, so I just wanted to come back and visit this place. It's been months since I've posted here. Those were dark days for me and this forum helped me a lot. The people here going through the same thing I was gave me strength to defeat Social Anxiety. 

I believe I had bipolar disorder. I was always afraid. I was always out of it. I was always second guessing myself and people made my confidence shrink to an itty bitty raisin. Just thinking of going outside made my heart start to beat faster, and my palms sweaty and cold and that familiar feeling of fear which I came to dread.

They say that your habits make or break you. Well I had 5 years of hiding, not speaking and being afraid to, and being nervous around people including my friends. I know standing up to this was going to be the hardest thing I ever did.

I decide to dedicate a whole year to fighting anxiety by myself. I never saw a shrink or a doctor about it. I was always afraid of what they might give me and I probably couldn't afford it. So for that long year, I fought with everything I had to be social, talk to my roommates, and hang out with people even when the feeling of being looked down upon and being thought of as socially retarded was eating me alive. 

Well, I am now into my second year of college and totally, refreshingly 100% anxiety free. I can talk to people and be myself, although I'm still having a hard time getting over my shyness I feel like I'm on my way to developing my social skills and I feel more confident than ever. I want you guys to know that, months ago. I was there. Hopeless. Defeated. Unsure if anything would ever change. 

But if you really want your anxiety to go away and are willing to face some of your worst fears over and over, your brain is going to be right there with you. Pushing through and changing so every time you'll feel a little less afraid. That is how I did it. I will look over this for a few days if anyone has any specific questions, and then probably be gone again. I'm rooting for all you!

:grin2:


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## peace_love (Oct 24, 2008)

Thats really awesome! I love seeing posts like this. Congrats!


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## normalsucksbutsodoesSA (Apr 2, 2015)

Thanks, peace_love! You can do this.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

thanks for the inspirational posts


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Congrats, gives me hope.


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## VanDamme (Jun 8, 2004)

Congrats on making the effort and finding what you needed! 



normalsucksbutsodoesSA said:


> But if you really want your anxiety to go away and are willing to face some of your worst fears over and over, your brain is going to be right there with you. Pushing through and changing so every time you'll feel a little less afraid.


That approach works for many but it wasn't enough for me (and I know for many others). I've attended Toastmasters for 9 months regularly but my SA did not change. At that time, I was dealing with really high intensity fear/panic (i.e. other than the usual heart racing, sweating, my mind also went blank very often). But I guess I was lucky that if I really wanted to, I could push through ...

Also, participated in many social situations without much progress. It was later then I found and incorporated other techniques/approaches that finally started to change SA.

So, overall the real question is, does your approach address your issue (often the "core" aspect) that will make a difference in whether something works or not. That's why you may hear and read about people who overcame SA after a few months of practicing meditation. Some are luckier and find something quickly but others may need to push more.


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

Congrats to you. It does give me some hope.


Not everyone is as lucky though. I left this site for a while (a year, maybe less, I honestly can't remember) and thought I was doing much better. And I think I was. And then my whole world collapsed.


It's good to hear the success stories, though. They're few and far between.


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## longtimenolove (Oct 21, 2015)

I don't know you at all, but that's amazing, well done!


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## naes (Nov 1, 2013)

normalsucksbutsodoesSA said:


> Hey guys, so I just wanted to come back and visit this place. It's been months since I've posted here. Those were dark days for me and this forum helped me a lot. The people here going through the same thing I was gave me strength to defeat Social Anxiety.
> 
> I believe I had bipolar disorder. I was always afraid. I was always out of it. I was always second guessing myself and people made my confidence shrink to an itty bitty raisin. Just thinking of going outside made my heart start to beat faster, and my palms sweaty and cold and that familiar feeling of fear which I came to dread.
> 
> ...


That's good for you. You should go into more detail though on the severity of your SA, how long you had it, etc...


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## Xenia1983 (Nov 17, 2015)

That´s great! Congratulations!


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## rubyruby (Jun 17, 2009)

You are being vague. what specifically did you do that conquered this disorder.


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## Anxiolytic (Nov 20, 2014)

I really am being a pessimist on this one; but, I would like to read an eloboration on this miraculous recovery because it seems misleading. Was your SA even really that bad in the first place? You're completely 'cured' after a few months of going outside your comfort zone? I did that for 3 years and I still have severe SA. I find it hard to believe your SA can be completely absolved after a few months; you were barely on this site for much of a significant duration either. Give us sustenance in your methods of recovery; otherwise, you're simply boasting without providing anything of value.


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## aprilb77 (Jun 9, 2012)

He is saying he improved by changing his thinking and getting rid of the victim mentality " My life is hopeless. I am never going to change.
I will never have friends or relationships." It's self sabotage. Your life will change once you get rid of the distorted thinking. It's inevitable.


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

aprilb77 said:


> He is saying he improved by changing his thinking and getting rid of the victim mentality " My life is hopeless. I am never going to change.
> I will never have friends or relationships." It's self sabotage. Your life will change once you get rid of the distorted thinking. It's inevitable.


I don't think it works like that...
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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