# If a guy asks a girl "Let's grab coffee/lunch sometime", does it sound like a date?



## peachteax3 (May 6, 2011)

*If a guy asks a girl "Let's grab coffee/lunch sometime", does it sound like a date?*

"Let's grab lunch sometime"
Let's grab coffee sometime"

Do both of those questions imply that it is a date? Does it depend on the context?

If the girl answers "yes" and the guy never contacts her (it was during finals), has he lost interest?


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

No, it sounds like let's grab coffee/lunch sometime.


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## centrino (Sep 27, 2010)

sure, why not?


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

Sounds like a date to me. He's not doing it for his health.


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## Hopeful25 (Aug 8, 2011)

So if I want to become better friends with a girl, I shouldn't suggest this because then it comes across like I'm hitting on her? 

And if I do want to hit on her this is a viable option? 


If I were to ask a girl on a date I'd make sure she knew I was asking her on a date, not try to make it seem friendly just so I can get it (that's a typical friendzone mistake).


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## missalyssa (Jun 18, 2011)

Yes 100%. 

If I got asked that by a guy, even if he has no intention of trying to date me I would respond "sure, but I have a boyfriend, so this is just as friends". And see if he still wants to go.

Or if I was single but not interested I'd say "sure, but its not a DATe, right?". I wouldn't let him buy for me or do anything cutesy.


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## ohgodits2014 (Mar 18, 2011)

When is "sometime"?

Those questions indicate an interest, but unless a specific time has been set no one has actually asked anyone out on a date.

Edit: Also, sometimes it does depend on the context.


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## StayingMotivated (Sep 5, 2011)

it could be a date but I wouldn't make to much of it  

mmmm coffeeeeeee


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## Stilla (May 13, 2009)

Depends on the context.


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## andy0128 (Dec 19, 2003)

Usually it's intended as a date yes. Since I have been with my partner there have been various guys sniffing around trying this approach. Exceptions are possible but the bulk of the time the guys looking for more than just friendship.


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## Emerald3 (Sep 17, 2009)

What if a GIRL says it to a GUY? 

Would you still class it as a date or a meeting between friends?


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## gentleman caller (Feb 22, 2012)

I think it's more of a pre-date if you will, to find out if he wants to take you out on a real date. Plus coffee or lunch is just easier and more casual. I guess if things go well you could progress from there. But I wouldn't automatically think it's a date.


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## blue the puppy (Jul 23, 2011)

sounds like a date to me, i dunno


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## Sadr00008 (Mar 9, 2012)

it all depends. if a guy tell it with a girl , its sounds like a date to me. And if he doesn't call he forgot about it cause he's not as interested as you think he is to you.!


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

its a date, lunch is an EASY way to date while avoiding having to ask for dinner lol.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Sounds like a date to me.

If the guy doesn't text you later for the date then give him one more chance to try and ask again. If he does it twice then move on. If he sets up the date and flakes once then move on.


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## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

I'm so dumb.

I'd automatically assume it _wasn't_ a date.


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## IcedOver (Feb 26, 2007)

As with most things in the dating realm, "Seinfeld" explored this idea, and brilliantly.


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## Banzai (Jun 4, 2009)

missalyssa said:


> Yes 100%.
> 
> If I got asked that by a guy, even if he has no intention of trying to date me I would respond "sure, but I have a boyfriend, so this is just as friends". And see if he still wants to go.
> 
> .


?

Maybe this is some kind of American phenomenon but I think it largely depends on context.


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## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

It doesn't mean its a date unless they ask you if you have a bf/gf then it probably is a date in their eyes.


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## RiversEdge (Aug 21, 2011)

He meant if he sees you around -- then to casually have lunch together or whatever, not a date at all.
Just be cool about it, don't think so much about it. If you run into each other you do, if not, it's whatever --- real casual...


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Honestly, does it even matter if it's a "date" or not?

Notice how the word alone makes peoples' reactions change.

Whether it's a "date" or not, it's going to go down the same way: you meet; you talk... it doesn't matter


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## Onigiri (Aug 3, 2010)

It sounds like hanging out to me b/c "sometime" = casual. It also depends on context but most likely, I would assume that it's just hanging out and not a "date".


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

It depends. If he was acting like a friend who wanted to hang out when he said it, then not a date. But if he was flirting and stuff... yeaahhh. Well I have a boyfriend and a few guys asked me to have lunch with them and get a coffee and stuff... so... not always in a date sense I guess...


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## Don Gio (Dec 14, 2011)

I always take a girl to lunch as a first date.


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## FTFADIA (Jul 26, 2011)

Emerald3 said:


> What if a GIRL says it to a GUY?
> 
> Would you still class it as a date or a meeting between friends?


Would like to hear some opinions on this as well. I was asked out to a movie once by a girl and thought nothing of it at first then started over analyzing like I always do and then became unsure if it was a date or not. Turned out as just friends, which I was happy with.

I guess I'm also in the dumb/ignorant camp that would say no, not a date.


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## bezoomny (Feb 10, 2007)

I disagree with the concept of dating. I don't find it relevant to my life. I'd consider it a friendly meeting. Relationships begin when they begin, until that time you're just friends, or screwing around, or whatever. Designating 'dates' seems very bizarre to me. My bf and I couldn't afford to eat out for about two months when we were both unemployed. So did we not date for two months simply because nothing was physically bought? I don't understand how this dating thing is going to create a healthy relationship, I've always gone with being friends first and then deciding to start a relationship.


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## sansd (Mar 22, 2006)

bezoomny said:


> I disagree with the concept of dating. I don't find it relevant to my life. I'd consider it a friendly meeting. Relationships begin when they begin, until that time you're just friends, or screwing around, or whatever. Designating 'dates' seems very bizarre to me.


I feel similarly.


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