# Free Association?



## laxgirl008 (Apr 18, 2006)

Been in therapy for a while now. Still having trouble talking when I am there. My therapist asked me to do some free association last time I was in an appointment but I couldn't seem to make it happen. In an effort to make it happen somehow she asked me to go home and write free association style on some topics we had been discussing. Now I'm trying to figure out what the hell to do.

Any pointers on how to go about this? I realize asking for directions is kind of missing the point of free association but I am feeding my perfectionist habit a bit. Should I be trying to focus on these topics and see what comes up (like one of those word webs) or just start with the topic and go wherever it goes?

My stupid brain knows the drill I think so it wants to jump to the most bizarre, embarrassing thoughts I can think of (like when you tell someone not to think of a polar bear - my immediate reaction to this exercise is to not think of crazy things so it pushes me right towards it instead). I guess if I am being honest with myself I am just a bit terrified at being open, honest, and putting all my thoughts out there.

Gahh maybe this is another post that deserves to be in "Frustration" instead of here.


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## MrWibblyWobbly (Mar 2, 2012)

If it helps any, journaling has been one of the few things that have helped me immensely in my path out of anxiety and depression. However, I *hate* free-association. I find it basically like opening Pandora's box, without any way to get the demons back under control. I tend to avoid it because it just perpetuates anxiety, and it doesn't give me enough of a way to regulate and control my emotions.

You might want to try something a bit more structured. This is what has worked the best for me:

1.) I sit down and pay attention to my body and notice any particular feelings that come up. It can be anything: a feeling of happiness or contentment, fear or guilt, sadness or longing. Just scan your body, and notice what you're feeling.

2.) Then just name (write down) the feeling. "Shame" or "anger" or "fear."

3.) Then ask yourself: "What is the cause of this emotion?" And then write down whatever you find comes up. If it's a positive emotion, it can help you write about the positive experience that caused it. This is really rewarding and can help enhance happiness, contentment, and gratitude with your life. If it's a negative emotion, you may want to go deeper and ask yourself these follow-up questions:

- "Is this an old feeling? Is this a ghost from the past that my mind is just churning up again, even though the situation has passed?"
- "Is the cause of this emotion a real threat? Is it about something completely out of my control? To what extent do I just need to let go?"
- "Is this emotion helping me? Or is choosing to focus on it just making me feel worse, and keeping me from doing constructive things?" If not, let it go.

I've found this much more useful than free-association without any structure, personally. Sometimes free-association can be helpful to get past your "inner critic" that keeps part of you unconscious, but I find consciously asking yourself "What's really going on here?" is much more useful.


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## laxgirl008 (Apr 18, 2006)

Over the past few years I, too, have found journaling to be very rewarding. Usually I write down whatever is going on, what's on my mind, etc, in a more structured manner. I've never quite done it like you describe though, I like the approach and I think I will give it a try.

I would rather not get into the free association but it is meant to be a new exercise for me, I think as a means of removing that inner critic you mentioned. Plus, my therapist is based out of the psychodynamic approach - free association is their bread and butter and I think she is dying for me to get on board. I agreed to give it a try, just trying to figure out how to go about it.


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## Daktoria (Sep 21, 2010)

You can always google the idea for inspiration, and take it from there.


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