# I always get nervous when making simple phone calls!



## 1applehearts1

i get nervous when calling people. does anyone else have this? this is why id rather text. its like i dont know what to say. even good family friends and relatives. its so annoying!!! it seems silly but it really gets to me.


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## UltraShy

Welcome to the club.

It's been a while since I've seen a classic phone phobia post. This is one of those fears that regularly comes up just like fear of going to get a hair cut & fear of using public restrooms.

In years past I've issued a challenge daring any SAS member to call me. I'm sure I must have given my phone number out to well over 100 people here over the years. I think something like 15 ever dared to actually call and most of them were intoxicated to some degree, from a mild buzz to very drunk.


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## 1applehearts1

UltraShy said:


> Welcome to the club.
> 
> It's been a while since I've seen a classic phone phobia post. This is one of those fears that regularly comes up just like fear of going to get a hair cut & fear of using public restrooms.
> 
> In years past I've issued a challenge daring any SAS member to call me. I'm sure I must have given my phone number out to well over 100 people here over the years. I think something like 15 ever dared to actually call and most of them were intoxicated to some degree, from a mild buzz to very drunk.


oh wow. sorry to hear that/.:|
well im glad im not alone

im not really afraid to use public bathrooms but i dont like going if theres other people in there. weird. :roll


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## AstronautsGrapes

I get very nervous when making calls. Just picking up a phone gets my heart pounding as if i've been sprinting all out for a few minutes. :afr


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## CeilingStarer

hi im joe said:


> I get very nervous when making calls. Just picking up a phone gets my heart pounding as if i've been sprinting all out for a few minutes. :afr


Me too, it's weird. I'm fine with family... no stress at all, but if I have to call my boss, insurance company or ISP or something, I'm ****ting myself once that last number is dialled.


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## rift3r

While dialing I get the heart pounding and a sick, heavy feeling, but once I'm speaking things do get better. I always rehearse what I plan to say and write it all down on paper though, otherwise I forget things due to the mind blank effect and my speech will come out fragmented and rambling


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## theuprising

Hmm maybe this is the answer to everything, I don't get scared because I stop THINKING and just DO it. I used to think about it and things came out stuttery, but if I just let the call happen and didn't rehearse or anything, it goes smoothly. Ahh maybe Eckhart was right, emotion is caused by thoughts, stop thinking useless thoughts and the useless emotions will be gone!

I'm going to try this when talking to a stranger or something.


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## Rixy

I dont really get nervous with certain phone calls, but I have that horrible awkwardness when I call friends. I feel like I can hear nails going down a chalkboard. One time I was calling a hotel/restaurant for a job and I ended up getting really nervous though, I found it hard to finish my sentence at the end.


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## hmf22

yes, me too! omgoodness, even on facebook chat I get nervous- especially when it's my boyfriend's sister! I try to avoid it, gahhhh


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## ready

This is somewhere where I actually have some experience. The simple answer is to just do it and not overanalyze what you say. If I make a "mistake", I just ignore it and move on. With time, anxiety will decrease. I still get nervous sometimes, but I just push through. The anxiety is not nearly as bad as a few years ago. Eventually it'll be down to negligible levels.


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## Stargirl09

I don't find it too hard making or receiving calls but I'm always scared I'll embarrass myself. Receiving a call puts you on the spot and to make a call I have to be in the right frame of mind or at least a better than usual f.o.m.

I don't like hearing the phone ring either, sometimes it gets my heart racing other times it's an intrusion. I tend to sound a bit angry on the phone too, part of phone manner is smiling to make you sound positive.


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## shyvr6

Yes


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## PsyKat

Me too, even checking my voicemail! Ridiculous isn't it? :roll


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## Milco

^I have the same thing also with voice mail :roll
Just something about having to listen carefully to what other people say that gets me nervous - often so nervous I can't concentrate on what they say and have to ask for them to repeat (or replay the message a few times in this case).
Oddly enough I can follow much better what is said when it's in school.


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## monkeyisland91

someone can call me.. i'll just sit and listen to you talking and reply with short answers... automated robot answering.


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## airu

I feel rather anxious when I need to check my voicemail too (and quite often, since I rarely pick up my cell - sometimes I just stare at it while it rings).

I jot notes down before calling too, bit ridiculous but it helps.


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## 1applehearts1

a lot of times when the phone rings and its a wrong number i feel so relieved i dont have to pick it up since its a number i dont recognize lol


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## SilentLoner

I hate using the phone. Its almost worse than face-to-face!


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## Haydsmom2007

me too.... texting, even. Sometimes.

But making stupid phone calls... I was talking to my friend while I was at her house one day about getting a toy easel for my son for Christmas and she was like "if you want to go get it, Hayden can stay here with me. But heres my phone, call hobby lobby to make sure they have what you're looking for before you drive out there..." ugh. I had to do it. It's little things like that that most people dont' even think about. 

I"d rather just talk face to face than talk on the phone.


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## heyJude

I have always gotten really nervous when I had to speak on the phone. Dialing someone's number out of the blue and having to speak to them is frightening. But, I've tried to overcome this fear by doing it more often, and I think I've gotten better at it...just this past Wednesday, I called a new friend of mine and chatted for about 10 minutes. I was nervous at first, but decided to just go for it, and you know what, it really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.


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## IWrite

I have the same problem. I used to have a job that required me to be on the phone most of the time. I was pretty good at it for awhile, but after having several verbally abusive callers, along with other factors in my life that were contributing to my SA, I was barely able to do my job by the time the company was shut down. These days, I still have to take a few deep breaths before I call to order chinese food.


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## No-Sturm-und-Drang

I used to think only people with sa have that problem but my roommate who is super social goes out every night not shy at all has problems calling too.


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## sublimit

Yup, this has always been an issue for me. No amount of experience making calls seems to make it any easier, and most of the advice I've received about overcoming phone call phobia hasn't worked either.


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## AussiePea

BIG issue for me, probably the worst issue I have atm actually. I lied about calling my Boss about work because I simply can not force myself to do it, for some reason it scares the utter crap out of me. So I usually email all the time (which I have no issue with) but it's not ideal.

I procrastinate so much about phone calls, not healthy. Funny how I am infinitely more comfortable about talking to them in real life than over the phone, and that goes for anyone.


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## Amethystwings

*A little delayed*

I may be a couple of years late but I'll post a reply anyway!
I feel exactly the same way. When I say 'exactly' I mean 'exactly'.
I dislike the fact that it's become a struggle. It is much easier if I had a drop or two (being tipsy) to gain my confidence over the phone. It's ridiculous and I'm not a big fan of drinking. Mind you I do not do this all the time. Sometimes I just pucker up and make that call just to get it over and done with. I don't answer my calls either.


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## visualkeirockstar

Yep. I do most of the time. I also don't like people to hear me talk on the phone.


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## Kalliber

I do too but it's slowly getting better


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## matahari

sorry but just wondering if all have the phobia answering calls, then why need to have one in the first place ? erm.


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## Emma91

Oh yeah, I have had this problem as long as I can remember even with my own family sometimes... But it's probably worse when it's someone I barely or dont even know. :hide


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## pup55

same here..but i am 100x better at it now. I take a lot of phone calls at work so i am use to it. Just takes repetition


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## LoungeFly

CeilingStarer said:


> Me too, it's weird. I'm fine with family... no stress at all, but if I have to call my boss, insurance company or ISP or something, I'm ****ting myself once that last number is dialled.


I"m ok with most of my family too, but yes, doctors, insurance companies, banks, people with work related things to discuss, or the worst, potential interest persons ( either they are interested in me, or me them ) Those are probably the worst because of my fear of dating and being physical.


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## forex

Anonymous calls i dont answer them .


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## Jadden Ramsey

A lot of people say the go blank that's not the problem for me I over think and it happens with every little thing I don't know about most SA's but I do this with everything. :no


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## The Islander

Yes, and the overanalyzing makes it so much worse. I had to call a dentist about a month ago and was pacing around with the phone on my hand for almost an hour and then ended up not calling at all. I always think I'll "do it tomorrow" and then have to stress about it again and again. Doesn't sound very rational but it's sadly becoming a habit of mine.


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## uziq

Me too. That's why I ALWAYS try and see if I can use a web form on the internet or email or something to work around this.



IWrite said:


> I have the same problem. I used to have a job that required me to be on the phone most of the time. I was pretty good at it for awhile, but after having several verbally abusive callers, along with other factors in my life that were contributing to my SA, I was barely able to do my job by the time the company was shut down. These days, I still have to take a few deep breaths before I call to order chinese food.


I used to work in a position like this, too. I had anxiety symptoms every day. Like 75% of days, I'd have diarrhea from the nervousness from looming projects, conference calls etc. I eventually got better with it, and I even got one of the highest marks on my team, but I avoided calls as much as possible. That means, when dealing with clients or customers I'd urge them to email me if they had a problem.. but then of course, there were always some that were like "Hi, can you call me so we can talk about X?"


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## SeraphSoul

I don't feel comfortable with calling or texting people i don't well.... ;m;


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## pocketbird

I am not either. I hate phone calls with a passion, I avoid phones like a plague. If I have to make one, I will write what I need to beforehand because if I don't, I will stutter and go blank. I always smile in response to everything, so saying YES over a smile/nod is a little different for me.


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