# Living with roommates at university



## .95596 (Aug 24, 2012)

This is my fourth year in the dorms living with roommates. First year was great and all because my dorm-mates and I had a lot of common interests, except they did hardcore drugs. Then during my second year my SA became exponentially worse after a close family member was diagnosed with cancer and I shut everyone out and just stayed in my room or in the library to study. I was angry all the time and didn't want to talk to anyone because they didn't understand. 
I have improved a bit, but I avoid interactions with my present roommates because it is just very awkward since we each have our own rooms and I hardly see them since I get up really early to go to work and I have night classes/labs. So basically I just go to my room to write papers, print stuff out, and sleep and I do the bulk of my studying in the library or study lounge. Anytime I see them I just say "Hi" or "How are you?" but it is very awkward and feels forced on my part. Anytime I am in the room I shut my door and do schoolwork and only leave my room to use the facilities. Anytime they bring friends over I never leave my room until they all leave. I can't wait for next year in grad school when I will have a studio single!!! Does anyone else experience anything similar or have any advice? I can't really get to know my roommates since I work and have school and I barely have any free time outside schoolwork and volunteering.


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## Cam1 (Dec 4, 2011)

Same when I lived on campus. Hated my roommate so I avoided my room all the time, it sucked.


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## .95596 (Aug 24, 2012)

Cam1 said:


> Same when I lived on campus. Hated my roommate so I avoided my room all the time, it sucked.


 What was the worst part for you? Was there any resolution of any conflict/disputes? For me there is no commonality between me and my roomates, but at least they appreciate my wanting to be alone and they are not complete slobs.


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## Cam1 (Dec 4, 2011)

He was a drug addict, snored, stayed up til 2-3 am during the week when I had 8 AM's every day, he was self centered, had this one annoying friend who had the maturity level of a 13 year old, I could go on and on and on.... lol.

I moved back home this year but it's a long commute, looking for apartments next year.


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## .95596 (Aug 24, 2012)

Cam1 said:


> He was a drug addict, snored, stayed up til 2-3 am during the week when I had 8 AM's every day, he was self centered, had this one annoying friend who had the maturity level of a 13 year old, I could go on and on and on.... lol.
> 
> I moved back home this year but it's a long commute, looking for apartments next year.


 Sounds eerily similar to my situation at present; however, my roommate is in his 30s. But he also snores, smokes pot, and comes into the common area of our apartment-style dorm very early in the mornings when I am attempting to sleep since I have class and work at 7 and 8 am. He isn't unpleasant, it is just that he cooks in our kitchen nude early in the mornings and ever since I walked in on him on cooking naked, while on my way to the bathroom, there has been an extreme level of awkwardness. At least you get to be surrounded by the comforts of home...my house is 4 hours north of my University so commuting to campus is out of the question.


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## cadoon13 (Oct 27, 2012)

Honestly, after a year living at the dorms I realized I couldn't do it anymore. My parents house was an hour away so I ended up going back there all the time anyway. I spent very little time with my roommate and there was some social tension between us. The room assignments were random and I ended up with a sorority girl. We had nothing in common and it was awful. We tolerated each other and thats about it. 

I found that things were much better (and cheaper) when I moved in with a friend the next year. We had things in common and liked to hang out. It gave me that social connection with someone while still being able to go to my room and be alone if i needed to. I'd recommend that. 

I live alone now and it kinda sucks. I cant bring myself to go out very often so it gets lonely at my house. You never realize how nice it is to just have some basic daily social contact until its gone.


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## .95596 (Aug 24, 2012)

cadoon13 said:


> Honestly, after a year living at the dorms I realized I couldn't do it anymore. My parents house was an hour away so I ended up going back there all the time anyway. I spent very little time with my roommate and there was some social tension between us. The room assignments were random and I ended up with a sorority girl. We had nothing in common and it was awful. We tolerated each other and thats about it.
> 
> I found that things were much better (and cheaper) when I moved in with a friend the next year. We had things in common and liked to hang out. It gave me that social connection with someone while still being able to go to my room and be alone if i needed to. I'd recommend that.
> 
> I live alone now and it kinda sucks. I cant bring myself to go out very often so it gets lonely at my house. You never realize how nice it is to just have some basic daily social contact until its gone.


I wish I could live at my parent's place, but it is too far. At least you got a friend to room with. I really don't have any friends to room with. Next year I hope I won't have roommates since I will be in Grad school...only time will tell.


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