# Anyone haunted by the life you could have had?



## TomRiddle (Jan 30, 2014)

Whenever I'm on campus, I see all these people laughing, hanging out with their friends, going to parties, dating, looking forward to their careers, etc and I think to myself "That should be me."

But it's not. I feel like I've lost a lot of time and a lot of relationships and opportunities and it causes me a lot of emotional distress


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## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

Nah because I understand I would have never had the chance. Those people that you see wen through s*** as well but they keep themselves up and happy or maybe they are hiding a secret we do not even know a clue about. Everyone is different.


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## Lacking Serotonin (Nov 18, 2012)

Yes. I had a chance to get on with BNSF when I was 19 and turned it down, because I wanted to be with my gf. Biggest mistake of my life. I could be making $100,000 right now, house, everything I want in life and worked hard in school for it and threw it away multiple times to be with a woman that didn't feel the same about me.


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## Higgins (Apr 19, 2012)

Sort of. I get pretty jealous when I'm sitting by myself waiting for my next class and a bunch of groups of friends pass me by, laughing it up. I'd have so much more self-confidence if I had a few friends, but I don't know how to make any. I feel grateful that I _am_ in a relationship so that's of no concern to me, but everything else is overwhelming and makes me feel like trash.


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## Frogourt (Jan 30, 2014)

this is exactly how i feel. hate it..


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## Alsark (Oct 20, 2013)

Lacking Serotonin said:


> Yes. I had a chance to get on with BNSF when I was 19 and turned it down, because I wanted to be with my gf. Biggest mistake of my life. I could be making $100,000 right now, house, everything I want in life and worked hard in school for it and threw it away multiple times to be with a woman that didn't feel the same about me.


Ouch. That really sucks, man. Sorry to hear that... even though I have no idea what BNSF is; but 100,000 is some bank.


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## Lacking Serotonin (Nov 18, 2012)

Alsark said:


> Ouch. That really sucks, man. Sorry to hear that... even though I have no idea what BNSF is; but 100,000 is some bank.


It's a major railroad. Yes sucks.


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## mike91 (Sep 23, 2012)

Lacking Serotonin said:


> Yes. I had a chance to get on with BNSF when I was 19 and turned it down, because I wanted to be with my gf. Biggest mistake of my life. I could be making $100,000 right now, house, everything I want in life and worked hard in school for it and threw it away multiple times to be with a woman that didn't feel the same about me.


yep I know how that feels I left school when I was 15 to game more and work a crappy paying job not for a girl


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## Lorenientha (Jul 22, 2013)

I feel like that all the time. I'm 17 so that might be early for me to complain but everybody else around me is having fun even when they're at the school they hate. I had the chance to be with a group of friends I actually liked but it felt so uncomfortable and awkward and I stepped back which is something to regret now.


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## krites (Nov 12, 2013)

Yep ALL the time. I feel like there's this whole other version of me that should exist but that "I" got in the way. And the feeling only gets worse with age


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## jc90 (Jun 24, 2013)

Paloma M said:


> Nah because I understand I would have never had the chance. Those people that you see wen through s*** as well but they keep themselves up and happy or maybe they are hiding a secret we do not even know a clue about. Everyone is different.


This.

Nobody is perfect. Ever heard the phrase, "Some of the most cheerful people are in fact the most depressed"? A lot of people who seem happy with those lavish lifestyles and "perfect" relationships are unhappy deep down inside. It's all a cover up.


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## Str (Jun 4, 2013)

TomRiddle said:


> Whenever I'm on campus, I see all these people laughing, hanging out with their friends, going to parties, dating, looking forward to their careers, etc and I think to myself "That should be me."
> 
> But it's not. I feel like I've lost a lot of time and a lot of relationships and opportunities and it causes me a lot of emotional distress


Me too. I think too much about what I would have been like if I never spent so much time online, or if I would have talked to other people more often.

Luckily it's not too late to still try. My biggest problem is that I usually prefer to do creative things (both on the computer and in real life) over just talking to other people I'm not so close with and who seem to be more interested in drinking and partying.


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## ZADY (Nov 11, 2013)

Yup... I wish I could enjoy high school.


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## ShadowOnTheWall (Dec 24, 2010)

I regret some foolish choices I made, and realised I'd be further ahead by now if I applied myself, but life goes on, and everyday is a chance to start building something new for ourselves.

Edit? Anyone remember that episode of Being Erika where Adam changed his passed and it was all great but he realised he couldn't live there, but was inspired by what he saw to work on his present and get out of his rut? Its a bit like that rly. Or maybe Being Erika in general.


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## HanSolo (Jul 5, 2013)

Paloma M said:


> Nah because I understand I would have never had the chance. Those people that you see wen through s*** as well but they keep themselves up and happy or maybe they are hiding a secret we do not even know a clue about. Everyone is different.


You can start today.

I only started this summer/fall...now this will be my 4th week of going to bars 3 nights, and not even drinking.

I would love to go with a wing-girl.....come with me tonight


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## ineverwipe (Jun 16, 2013)

Yea I've missed out on so much. It doesn't bother me much anymore but it's still at the back of my mind. I could have been happier but oh well im used to the life I have now and wouldn't change it for anyone


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## Meehan (Jan 2, 2014)

you can change! in highschool i was bullied to the point where when i transfered i was no one, i didnt want to be a part of these things, looking back now i missed out on prom, and football games and other social things i regret now. Im in college now and am way more social trying to put my self out there. dont make the same mistakes as me get involvled dont stand on the side lines. Also i run a support group for people with sad which i think you can benefit greatly from heres my pg if you want to link up. https://www.facebook.com/patrick.meehan.7505


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## Bebelove (Jan 26, 2014)

I feel that way at times too. I go back and forth with it though because i think im doing myself by not even trying to make friends since the total desire isnt there completely. I always winder what if, but then i snap out of it. Some people are lucky enough to have a few good friends. Someone like myself, - well, i have none and i guess ive grown to be fine with it and i also push people away. I have a brick wall up and ive grown accustomed to these ways. I do think if i perhaps had genuine friends, i might open up more, but im terrified too because of my past. I now suffer from extremely bad SA but i understand, im not cut out for friends, socializing. Ill even become drained with too much people interaction. But i mean, it would be great to have at least someone to confide in. I guess it might not be meant for me.


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## Bebelove (Jan 26, 2014)

I feel that way at times too. I go back and forth with it though because i think im doing myself a favor by not even trying to make friends since the total desire isnt there completely. I always winder what if, but then i snap out of it. Some people are lucky enough to have a few good friends. Someone like myself, - well, i have none and i guess ive grown to be fine with it and i also push people away. I have a brick wall up and ive grown accustomed to these ways. I do think if i perhaps had genuine friends, i might open up more, but im terrified too because of my past. I now suffer from extremely bad SA but i understand, im not cut out for friends, socializing. Ill even become drained with too much people interaction. But i mean, it would be great to have at least someone to confide in. I guess it might not be meant for me.


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## Meehan (Jan 2, 2014)

Bebelove said:


> I feel that way at times too. I go back and forth with it though because i think im doing myself a favor by not even trying to make friends since the total desire isnt there completely. I always winder what if, but then i snap out of it. Some people are lucky enough to have a few good friends. Someone like myself, - well, i have none and i guess ive grown to be fine with it and i also push people away. I have a brick wall up and ive grown accustomed to these ways. I do think if i perhaps had genuine friends, i might open up more, but im terrified too because of my past. I now suffer from extremely bad SA but i understand, im not cut out for friends, socializing. Ill even become drained with too much people interaction. But i mean, it would be great to have at least someone to confide in. I guess it might not be meant for me.


hey i know its tough but you can overcomr your sa, you can hae friends im sure your a very likeable person. I use to have a wall also but i learned to trust people agian and so can you. Are you happy being alone? im guessing no, you want to have friends so you need to make changes, I know its hard i still find it tough bu you can do it!


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## FunkyFedoras (Aug 30, 2013)

I've never thought of my life as having had the possibly sometime in another lifetime where it could be a different one so no, I am not haunted by the life I could have had. However, there's always decisions I've made that I'm haunted by.


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## jvanb00c (Apr 13, 2012)

Yeah I "what if" myself all the time about my school life. So many things I would go back and do differently knowing all I know now. Pretty depressing knowing who I am now and what I could have been had I just pushed myself not to be a coward.


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## Asdf*456 (Feb 1, 2014)

Yes. Every single day of my life.
I haven't gone to University yet, but I am this fall, and I'm terrified!
Terrified of it being a repeat of high school.


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

Yeah, when I think of my first year of university I feel really nostalgic, as I might have been able to make friends. At the time I felt like there was so much opportunity, but now there is nothing.


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

hrk said:


> Yes. Every single day of my life.
> I haven't gone to University yet, but I am this fall, and I'm terrified!
> Terrified of it being a repeat of high school.


You should be excited too, you have wonderful opportunities ahead of you.


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

hrk said:


> Yes. Every single day of my life.
> I haven't gone to University yet, but I am this fall, and I'm terrified!
> Terrified of it being a repeat of high school.


In my experience it's way, way different from hs. Completely. I was terrified, too before I went (I almost didn't go at all). It took me a semester or so to find friends and start hanging out but living in a dorm helped me get out there and meet people. You'll do fine.


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## AlchemyFire (Mar 4, 2013)

It's never too late to start.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

AlchemyFire said:


> It's never too late to start.


Exactly. Why feel miserable over lost experiences? That wastes time and just impedes you from going out there and creating them.


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## Anonymous45 (Feb 3, 2014)

I had so many opportunities to make friends with people in my grade, but SA got in the way and I missed all of them. I kept on losing friends because of SA and now my friend is a senior and I'm a junior which means she'll be leaving next year and ill be alone and dwelling on what could have been :/


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