# No group for uni group work assignment



## Nina24 (Aug 7, 2016)

Ok so i'm having a full panic attack and I have no idea what to do except to spill it all out here in hopes of calming myself down.

So i'm currently in my second semester of uni and for one of my subjects in the first week we were told we would need to organize ourselfs into groups in order to do a group assignment. Since i don't really fit into any of the cliques in my class I decided to sit next to this girl and guy in the second week of class because they aren't really in any groups, they usually just hang out together so I thought I could just join them. And in that class we did decide to jsut work together. Anyways I left straight after the class but I just found out that they stayed after the class and joined other groups because we need to be in groups of 5 and there was only 3 of us. The girl only emailed me today and told me all of this. She said that she was going to ask this other girl if she could join her group. 

So I msg a couple of people in my class and all of their groups are full. I told the girl idk what to do and she told me to ask one of the guys in our class if i can join his group because apparently the guy that me and her were supposed to be in a group with joined his group. So i msg that guy and he said "we will talk about this on Tuesday to find a solution for you" and he said that that girl and guy that i was supposed to be working with are already in their group so there is currently 4 of them in the group but he sounded like he didnt want me in their group. And it's just weird because the girl told me she was going to join this other group of all girls and then he says that she''s in his group like wth? I found it weird when she said that she was going to join that girl group because her and this guy are literally always together and have so far done every group assignment together. Anyways the guy that's in the group that the guy and girl i was originally working with just replied to my msg and said that he will call me tomorrow and let me know if i can join their group, like wth. I don't understand why he needs so much time to decide if i can join.

I just don't know what to think, now i'm worried because I don't have a group and our teacher likes to embarass us infront of the class because he thinks it will help us grow, I know that in the next class he will be like to me "why don't you have a group, you need to learn how to communicate with others and find yourself a group" in front of everyone. But the thing is i've actually tried communicating with others and asking them to join there groups but it seems that they're all full or they don't want me for some reason. 

I'm panicking so much right now and just feel completely worthless


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## Nina24 (Aug 7, 2016)

Also one of the girls that i asked if i could join their group said that they're full but that we can ask the proff if we can have a group of six however I know that they don't really want me and I would feel so uncomfortable in their group because they're all really confident and outspoken and I'm not due to my anxiety i'm usually really quite in class and I know that they're thinking "oh no we don't want to be stuck with the useless quiet girl" So i just feel like **** atm because even though she offered to ask if I could join their group, I know what they're thinking. I just don't understand why the 2 people I was supposed to be working with didn't want to work with me that much I mean surely i'm not that bad that they can't even stand doing one assingment with me.


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## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

Hey there, try not to stress out!! It'll get itself sorted out. Even if you don't end up joining that guy's group, the professor will have to find someone for you -- maybe you could email him before your next class to let him know that you are having trouble (and note that you have called and texted classmates to no avail).

And if you end up with the group of outspoken girls, maybe you could offer support in other ways if you feel you can't contribute much in the way of offering ideas/being outspoken. Like editing the bits together or something? Honestly though, there's nothing wrong with being quiet in a group, so long as you get your part done.

Good luck with everything, I know how much uni group work sucks! *It will be fine*, just try to relax because it won't do you any good to be stressed before you even start the actual assignment. :squeeze


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## Nina24 (Aug 7, 2016)

Thanks for your reply. It just worries me what the proff will think and how he will react at the fact that i'm the only one without a group, he will probs think it's my fault and that I didn't communicate well with others in order to get into a group or something but the thing is that I actually did make an effort to communicate with classmates and get myself into a group. It also sucks knowing that people in your class don't want to work with you.


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## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

Nina24 said:


> It also sucks knowing that people in your class don't want to work with you.


It sounds like these people are just better friends with each other (which you already knew, as you said you weren't part of any cliques), not necessarily that they don't want to work with you. But yeah, it does suck feeling that way, I know.

And don't worry too much about what the professor thinks - just point out that you _did_ try if he says anything. I doubt he will think it's your fault! (And even if he does, screw him!)


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## Nina24 (Aug 7, 2016)

Yeah I guess I could look at it from that perspective. But the thing is that, that one group that I asked if I could work with them only has 4 members as far as I know and we need 5 members per group & they didn't say I could join their group when I asked, they just said they would let me know so idk what's the go there. Hopefully this all gets sorted out, I had a massive panic attack over this today & was considering just dropping out of uni. It sucks because i'm stuck with the same people in this one class for the next 2 and a half years & like i said they're all in cliques or have at least one friend that they're always with, i'm the only one that doesn't fit anywhere & that has no-one


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## Topia (Apr 7, 2016)

Yeah, I wouldn't stress too much over it either. If nothing works out, the professor will get you into a group and if you think about it, all you need to do is power through these next two and a half years and you'll have it all over and done with. Then you can just forget about it all and keep on going with your life.

I don't know how small your uni is either but there's usually other classes doing the same course and there are usually people in those classes without a group too so you're probably not alone on this.


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## Nina24 (Aug 7, 2016)

Yeah like you said i've just got to power through the next two years & just learn to deal with these types of situations I guess. I just hate this panicked feeling that i currently have & i'm dreading going to class again I also feel akward because now I think that the girl i was originally supposed to work with really dislikes me & I usually sit next to her in class so it will be akward sitting next to her now but it will also be akward moving to another seat because everyone kind of sits in the same seats for every class , but this too shall pass I guess, gotta get through these feelings. 

I'm not on the main campus, i'm at the city campus which is literally in a office building and my uni rents out 3 floors of that building & there's literally only one class in my course. I regret not applying to go to a larger campus tbh but i didn't know before I applied for this course that there would only be 1 class I though there would at least be 3 so i'm pretty much stuck with the same 20 people for the next 2 and a half years & I can get through it somehow even tho I don't have a clique, it just sucks when it comes to group work because it's hard for me to find a group but that's just something i'm going to have to learn to deal with I guess.


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## yellowpages (May 16, 2012)

I started uni 1 year ago, and I've had to deal with this exact same problem again and again (see my thread about it -http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f18/group-assignments-at-uni-1800809/).

No one really wants to work with me at uni, so I've been forced to just approach the professor and ask them to put me in a group. It's a pretty embarrassing situation, but honestly, I don't even care anymore and neither should you. We're here for our education. None of this **** will matter once uni is over. Just do what you've gotta do & ask the professors/lecturers/whatever to allocate you a group.


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