# my girlfriend wants me to do kinky stuff



## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

I'm not really into this kinky stuff and I find it hard to even talk about in detail. My needs are pretty straightforward in the physical department. Basically I'm satisfied with the current arrangement. Different positions? I'm not a gymnast for god's sake!!


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## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

LOL. Just play with her. She wants to spice up the sex life with different positions. You will have fun. Just give it a try. Next time she will do something for you.


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## Charmander (Sep 5, 2012)

Maybe she's not getting much excitement out of it though? It won't hurt to try new things. (No pun intended)


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

Different positions isn't really that kinky. Bondage, golden showers and doing it in public places are pretty kinky. Any of those appeal?


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

I have heard of bondage not sure what golden showers are...I'm just talking about different positions. Please let's not go down the explicit path!


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## changeme77 (Feb 22, 2013)

I like your girlfriend's enthusiasm. Get a bit creative son!


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## Green Eyes (Sep 6, 2009)

Trying different positions isn't that kinky. And there are so many, they aren't all that hard. Maybe you could try it. You might like it.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

Green Eyes said:


> Trying different positions isn't that kinky. And there are so many, they aren't all that hard. Maybe you could try it. You might like it.


I probably should explain that I have devout Christian origins.


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

totalloner said:


> I have heard of bondage not sure what golden showers are...I'm just talking about different positions.


 Again - that's not really kinky.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

scarpia said:


> Again - that's not really kinky.


Well it is to me.


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

totalloner said:


> Well it is to me.


Then that's a problem. It's pretty important that people be sexually compatable for a relationship to work out. Is your sex drive low? Have you checked your testosterone level? If that is not the problem then I'm afraid she might not be the one for you. How old are you?


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

scarpia said:


> Then that's a problem. It's pretty important that people be sexually compatable for a relationship to work out. Is your sex drive low? Have you checked your testosterone level? If that is not the problem then I'm afraid she might not be the one for you. How old are you?


Starting to sound like an interrogation where I have to defend my view on things which is hardly fair. 
I will say this. We are compatible spiritually. That's all that matters.


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## DubnRun (Oct 29, 2011)

Sorry to intrude but please briefly explain how as a total loner you got a gf.....


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

DubnRun said:


> Sorry to intrude but please briefly explain how as a total loner you got a gf.....


No other friends.


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

totalloner said:


> Starting to sound like an interrogation where I have to defend my view on things which is hardly fair.
> I will say this. We are compatible spiritually. That's all that matters.


I'm not meaning to interrogate you. But I do need more information to advise you. I amm just saying that she may leave you if she isn't getting her needs met. There are therapists who specialize in this kind of thing. Have you considered that?


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

tell her to get a hobby like knitting clothes or something


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

scarpia said:


> I'm not meaning to interrogate you. But I do need more information to advise you. I amm just saying that she may leave you if she isn't getting her needs met. There are therapists who specialize in this kind of thing. Have you considered that?


Ok I'll assume you are trying to be helpful then.
I'm confident our relationship is on a firm foundation and does not depend on abnormal sex to flourish. I'm figuring once we marry and have a few kids, she will wake up and realise how unnecessary this all is.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

MobiusX said:


> tell her to get a hobby like knitting clothes or something


You think so?


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## Charmander (Sep 5, 2012)

I don't see how different positions is abnormal. If she wants to get more pleasure by being on top etc then what's the issue? There's nothing wrong in meeting her halfway.


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## enfield (Sep 4, 2010)

is the point that she wants to orgasm but is not orgasming? is that what the fuss is about? because if she is, and it's not that, than she should be quiet, not pressure you into uncomfortable things when she has nothing legitimate to complain about. but if she _isn't _than i can understand why she might want to try new things, since that would only seem fair.


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## Green Eyes (Sep 6, 2009)

totalloner said:


> I probably should explain that I have devout Christian origins.


So, the reason you don't want to do other positions are because of you religion? Isn't that allowed. You should explain that to her. But she might want more. I don't know what you guys do, and it's kind of private. But maybe you can find a middle?


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Just tell her you're not comfortable with trying different positions. I just hope she doesn't get bored. ><


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

If you don't feel comfortable with it, you need to talk to her.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

If you truely don't want to do it, don't do it. But you'd have to break it to her tactfully.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

Different positions isn't kinky. That's not a matter of opinions, that's just fact. If I start every morning off with a bagel then one morning have some pancakes, I'm not going off the deepend. Just changing things so they aren't boring or repetitive. I don't understand how religion doesn't permit changing positions. Do you guys just do missionary, every single time? I can understand why that would be boring for her. Why not switch it up? Jesus isn't going to send you to hell over doggy style. But if you're very, very, very conservative when it comes to sex and she is not, then that's a difference in compatibility and it's something to discuss. One of you is going to have to waver, and I'd imagine since she's the bored party, she wouldn't be happy to be the one wavering.


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## changeme77 (Feb 22, 2013)

Green Eyes said:


> maybe you can find a middle?


are you suggesting what i think you're suggesting?


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

totalloner said:


> I probably should explain that I have devout Christian origins.


Oh, so you are sexually repressed then. I feel sorry for your gf if that is the case. Doing nothing but missionary position during sex can get extremely boring and dull real quick.



millenniumman75 said:


> If you don't feel comfortable with it, you need to talk to her.


Oh, MM75, in case you are wondering, this thread is what you might call a "sexual incompatibility" between partners.


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## thephantommenace (Aug 4, 2012)

Charmander said:


> I don't see how different positions is abnormal. If she wants to get more pleasure by being on top etc then what's the issue? There's nothing wrong in meeting her halfway.


apparently you don't know who Lilith was. she was Adams first wife before Eve but she was cast to hell because she wanted to have sex on top. then in hell she f-cked the devil. true story, just look it up.


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## Charmander (Sep 5, 2012)

thephantommenace said:


> apparently you don't know who Lilith was. she was Adams first wife before Eve but she was cast to hell because she wanted to have sex on top. then in hell she f-cked the devil. true story, just look it up.


Wow, didn't even know that. 
I guess it's fair enough if this gets in the way of his religious beliefs, but I can see why she'd be bored if he's just doing missionary all the time.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

thephantommenace said:


> apparently you don't know who Lilith was. she was Adams first wife before Eve but she was cast to hell because she wanted to have sex on top. then in hell she f-cked the devil. true story, just look it up.


Why is a woman having sex on top so bad? I don't understand...


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

totalloner said:


> I probably should explain that I have devout Christian origins.


You're having sex out of marriage and you find it difficult to have sex in different positions because of your religion? "That ship has sailed".


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## Charmander (Sep 5, 2012)

nubly said:


> You're having sex out of marriage and you find it difficult to have sex in different positions because of your religion? "That ship has sailed".


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## D G (Mar 15, 2013)

Then don't, problem solved.


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

nubly said:


> You're having sex out of marriage and you find it difficult to have sex in different positions because of your religion? "That ship has sailed".


QFT. Reminds me of the term "emergency room catholic"....meaning you pray and are religious when it's convenient and deemed to be an emergency.

Yeah, that ship has sailed.....

And your g/f is going to get bored. She may or may not leave you because of this, but I'd really suggest you find some way to work this out, like quickly....


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

You shouldn't do anything you don't feel comfortable with, and there's nothing wrong with only enjoying "vanilla" sex. That being said, your GF seems bored with whatever it is you guys are doing, so if you're not willing to try new things with her the relationship might not work out...


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## kiirby (Oct 8, 2010)

_I guess you just need to stop being such a... christian missionary._

HAHAHAhahaha...ahhhhhhh...

On a serious note, though, sexual compatibility is very important in a relationship. You seem far too comfortable with the fact that you are "satisfied with the current arrangement" despite it being blindingly obvious that she isn't. It is absolutely key that you at least attempt to reach out of your comfort zone in order to satisfy her comfort zone. If you know what I mean.

If it is absolutely not possible for you, then yes, the discussion needs to be had. As far as it goes, religious sexual repression can be very serious and damaging, but be aware that it might appear to her that you are just being inconsiderate.

Regardless, best of luck.



MobiusX said:


> tell her to get a hobby like knitting clothes or something


You are my favourite person.


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## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Lucky you...


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

AllToAll said:


> You shouldn't do anything you don't feel comfortable with, and there's nothing wrong with only enjoying "vanilla" sex. That being said, your GF seems bored with whatever it is you guys are doing, *so if you're not willing to try new things with her the relationship might not work out.*..


I have to be true to myself so will risk losing her. There is a price one must pay for Christian scruples. 
Thank you all for your kind advice. You must think I'm kinda weird but it's like I have to obey the voice inside. I've never had a strong libido anyway if the truth be known.


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## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)




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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

nubly said:


> You're having sex out of marriage and you find it difficult to have sex in different positions because of your religion? "That ship has sailed".


I didn't even think of that! LOL! I'm sorry to be mean about the OP but that's a hilariously glaring hypocrisy haha


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## edhoo (Feb 15, 2011)

totalloner said:


> I have to be true to myself so will risk losing her. There is a price one must pay for Christian scruples.
> Thank you all for your kind advice. You must think I'm kinda weird but it's like I have to obey the voice inside. I've never had a strong libido anyway if the truth be known.


Well your religion already says you are going to hell for having sex so you may as well go out in style


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

God forbid she asks you to get the cuffs out.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

God forgive them. They know not what they say.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Or anal


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

totalloner said:


> God forgive them. They know not what they say.


Maybe you should read the Bible and see what it has to say about pre-marital sex. Then you can ask your own God for forgiveness instead of hypocritically transferring the responsibility and problem to someone else to satisfy your own hypocrisy and self-centrism.


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## F1X3R (Jul 20, 2009)

totalloner said:


> I have to be true to myself so will risk losing her. There is a price one must pay for Christian scruples.
> Thank you all for your kind advice. You must think I'm kinda weird but it's like I have to obey the voice inside. I've never had a strong libido anyway if the truth be known.


You don't have a strong libido and yet you couldn't wait for marriage? Those are some Christian scruples.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

Noca said:


> Maybe you should read the Bible and see what it has to say about pre-marital sex. Then you can ask your own God for forgiveness instead of hypocritically transferring the responsibility and problem to someone else to satisfy your own hypocrisy and self-centrism.


I forgive you.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

F1X3R said:


> You don't have a strong libido and yet you couldn't wait for marriage? Those are some Christian scruples.


I want to settle down, have children, live a good moral family man's life.


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## F1X3R (Jul 20, 2009)

totalloner said:


> I want to settle down, have children, live a good moral family man's life.


LOL, you trollin.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

F1X3R said:


> LOL, you trollin.


I knew I should've posted in the spiritual section having to deal with disrespect like this.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

totalloner said:


> I knew I should've posted in the spiritual section having to deal with disrespect like this.


They are being disrespectful but it would help if you would let us know why you think it is fine to have sex before marriage but it's not ok to have sex in the reverse cowgirl position.

Sex is an important part of a relationship and if you keep on doing the samething over and over, it'll grow stale. Does the bible really say that the missionary position is the only position allowed?


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

Why is Jesus so involved in sex lives anyway? It's like cause he promised his dad he'd never get any, he wants to make sure other people have as little as possible.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Barette said:


> Why is Jesus so involved in sex lives anyway? It's like cause he promised his dad he'd never get any, he wants to make sure other people have as little as possible.


And yet he watches people have it...oh he watches.


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## googleamiable (Jun 5, 2009)

well u can interpret religion how you see fit IE im sure OP doesnt believe people should be stoned to death. so if you choose to believe in a way that dictates you sex life, adhere to it, if not, do what you want and thats fine too. always remember religion =/= god


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

AussiePea said:


> And yet he watches people have it...oh he watches.


He definitely watches people. I bet Jesus is the biggest kinker out there. It's always the ones that put on the purest act, you know? Like the Christian girls that do anal in order to remain virgins. You know Jesus is into freaky ****.


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## changeme77 (Feb 22, 2013)

I am trying to understand what the point of making this thread was exactly.


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## kast (Nov 22, 2012)

Ok, I was expecting pegging and sadomasochism. Trying different positions is still firmly within the realm of conventional/vanilla sex, so don't feel like you'd be doing anything odd. 

Which positions has she suggested? From the level of your aversion to this idea, anyone would think that she wants you to have sex doing a handstand or lock your ankles behind your head. If you're comfortable having sex with her in missionary style, it's not a huge leap to do the exact same sex act simply with your bodies positioned a bit differently. What about it exactly would make you uncomfortable? Is it something like.. you're afraid of seeing her anus? Someone's gotta ask.

If a sex act genuinely makes you very uncomfortable and it's against some sort of personal values, then you shouldn't do it. But because you're with a partner who you're not sexually compatible with, you also shouldn't feel bitter toward her when she realises that the relationship is not going to work. You just need a partner who wants the same things that you want.

*tl;dr:* She's clearly not satisfied, the sex life is dull, and she probably thinks you're a poor lover because you lack openness and you're stubborn. Some compromise is normal for a relationship. Talk to her about all of this; communication is important.


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## kast (Nov 22, 2012)

enfield said:


> is the point that she wants to orgasm but is not orgasming? is that what the fuss is about? because if she is, and it's not that, than she should be quiet, not pressure you into uncomfortable things when she has nothing legitimate to complain about. but if she _isn't _than i can understand why she might want to try new things, since that would only seem fair.












Not sure if king of sarcasm, or Christian...


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## enfield (Sep 4, 2010)

kast said:


> Not sure if king of sarcasm, or Christian...


I am spiritually christian, mhm.


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## kast (Nov 22, 2012)

Barette said:


> He definitely watches people. I bet Jesus is the biggest kinker out there. It's always the ones that put on the purest act, you know? Like the Christian girls that do anal in order to remain virgins. You know Jesus is into freaky ****.


Rumour has it that Jesus got a chub on the cross. I bet he has a penchant for bondage too.


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## F1X3R (Jul 20, 2009)

totalloner said:


> I knew I should've posted in the spiritual section having to deal with disrespect like this.


No I was accusing you of trolling people with this faux Christian shaming you baited people into.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

> Rumour has it that Jesus got a chub on the cross. I bet he has a penchant for bondage too.


Here they come . These kind of shock jock statements. So predictable.
Just childish pointscoring agasinst people who have the courage to believe in something greater than themselves. I'm not ashamed to be called Christian. People like you sterotype people like us. That's fine but it shows how ignorant, narrow-minded and immature you really are.


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

F1X3R said:


> No I was accusing you of trolling people with this faux Christian shaming you baited people into.


Oh Ok then.


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## LorenLuke (Jan 3, 2011)

Noca said:


> Maybe you should read the Bible and see what it has to say about pre-marital sex. Then you can ask your own God for forgiveness instead of hypocritically transferring the responsibility and problem to someone else to satisfy your own hypocrisy and self-centrism.


Irony being it saying nothing about it, only about extra-marital affairs.


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## Rixy (Oct 4, 2009)

Just try it once, man. No one's going to judge you.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

totalloner said:


> I want to settle down, have children, live a good moral family man's life.


That's a healthy desire. Does your girlfriend want the same thing? Does the relationship look like it's headed towards marriage?

Pre-marital sex is against Christian doctrine but kinky sex is not against Christian doctrine. There is nothing in the Bible that says you can use whip cream or role-playing with your wife.


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## tieffers (Jan 26, 2013)

Rixy said:


> Just try it once, man. No one's going to judge you.


I don't think he's afraid of judgment. He's just uncomfortable doing...whatever it is his girlfriend wants him to do; I'm not sure, but you guys and his girlfriend especially shouldn't be pressuring him to do anything he's not comfortable with sexually. This is just a no-brainer. I don't even get it. Having simple tastes isn't a bad thing. It's just...preferences, and they should be respected, because compromising yourself sexually - and possibly even worse, letting your partner compromise you sexually - is bound to be toxic for both your emotional well-being and your relationship.

I don't actually have any advice on how totalloner is going to be able to work around this and keep his girlfriend happy, because I wouldn't know...but I thought I'd say something because the insensitivity surrounding this subject is kind of appalling.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

totalloner said:


> I'm not really into this kinky stuff and I find it hard to even talk about in detail. My needs are pretty straightforward in the physical department. Basically I'm satisfied with the current arrangement. Different positions? I'm not a gymnast for god's sake!!


please dont feel pressured into doing something your not comfortable with, imho talk to your gf and do what feels comfortable for both of you= at the end of the day its your body and your decision


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

I hate to be that person but, I wonder if there would be as many "shut up, don't be a prude and just try it to make them happy" responses if it was a girl saying her boyfriend wanted her to do positions that made her uncomfortable. If that was the case, I feel there would be more sympathetic responses saying "don't let him pressure you into anything just to to satisfy his sexual urges, leave him, etc". 

So my response.. don't feel that you have to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. I'd suggest talking to her openly about it. If this is something that you guys can't find a middle ground on, then you might not be "meant to be". Sexual compatibility is a big part of a relationship, so it's best to address this as soon as possible I think...


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## F1X3R (Jul 20, 2009)

totalloner said:


> I forgive you.





totalloner said:


> God forgive them. They know not what they say.





TenYears said:


> QFT. Reminds me of the term "emergency room catholic"....meaning you pray and are religious when it's convenient and deemed to be an emergency.


I remember him posting that he is semi-religious, sometimes buddist, which is why it's funny to see him wielding Christian shame at people here and at his gf. It sounds like it's just about his needs being met, with kinky meaning anything unnecessary to him getting off.


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## TheManInTheRedSuit (Mar 30, 2013)

He is using his religion as a shield for being a complete douchebag. He wants an excuse that can't be argued, like it's part of my religion. However, it's not. Show me in the Bible where it says "Thou shalt only preform missionary position". I'll be waiting right here hypocrite.


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## D G (Mar 15, 2013)

I don't understand why people are giving him advice or debating with him, he didn't ask a question he just stated that he isn't in to something (for whatever dumb religious reason he himself made up apparantly) and that's it. LEAVE TOTALLONER ALONE!
(he's probably just trolling everybody though)


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## totalloner (Jan 29, 2013)

TheManInTheRedSuit said:


> He is using his religion as a shield for being a complete douchebag. He wants an excuse that can't be argued, like it's part of my religion. However, it's not. Show me in the Bible where it says "Thou shalt only preform missionary position". I'll be waiting right here hypocrite.


I forgive myself for not forgiving you.


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## changeme77 (Feb 22, 2013)

totalloner said:


> I forgive myself for not forgiving you.


I am pretty sure this is bending the rules of Christianity.


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## Sacrieur (Jan 14, 2013)

Your poor, poor girlfriend D:

You're nothing but a selfish ingrate. Oh so your sexual needs are met so hers are? What do you think she is, some kind of tool to be used by you? All you're doing is thinking about yourself and what you want out of it, I'm sure her own needs and wants don't even enter your mind if they're not on a rigid course with your dogma... Unless it's _your_ needs and wants, then the dogma goes out the window.

Get out.


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## panopticon (Nov 14, 2010)

Sacrieur said:


> Your poor, poor girlfriend D:
> 
> You're nothing but a selfish ingrate. Oh so your sexual needs are met so hers are? What do you think she is, some kind of tool to be used by you? All you're doing is thinking about yourself and what you want out of it, I'm sure her own needs and wants don't even enter your mind if they're not on a rigid course with your dogma... Unless it's _your_ needs and wants, then the dogma goes out the window.
> 
> Get out.


He's not obligated to do anything he's uncomfortable with. It doesn't make him an ingrate and it doesn't make him selfish. I agree with Monroee that there is sexism at play here: if he were female he wouldn't be receiving this kind of response. There will be consequences to his relationship if he refuses, but it's still his decision to make.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

panopticon said:


> He's not obligated to do anything he's uncomfortable with. It doesn't make him an ingrate and it doesn't make him selfish. I agree with Monroee that there is sexism at play here: if he were female he wouldn't be receiving this kind of response. There will be consequences to his relationship if he refuses, but it's still his decision to make.


I seriously doubt the replies would be different if the gender were reversed. It's not like she wants him to start using sharp objects during sex. She's just asking to do different positions because doing the samething over and over gets boring.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

totalloner said:


> I forgive myself for not forgiving you.


Yo dawg...


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## panopticon (Nov 14, 2010)

nubly said:


> I seriously doubt the replies would be different if the gender were reversed. It's not like she wants him to start using sharp objects during sex. She's just asking to do different positions because doing the samething over and over gets boring.


I have a hard time imagining people pressuring a woman into performing a sexual act that she's not okay with and then calling her selfish for being reluctant, but regardless of their sex it's appalling. What his girlfriend would like him to do is irrelevant, he has boundaries and the decent thing is to respect them.


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## F1X3R (Jul 20, 2009)

panopticon said:


> I have a hard time imagining people pressuring a woman into performing a sexual act that she's not okay with and then calling her selfish for being reluctant, but regardless of their sex it's appalling. What his girlfriend would like him to do is irrelevant, he has boundaries and the decent thing is to respect them.


The history of male/female sexuality and gender roles within certain religions is a factor in how some people are responding.


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## Alas Babylon (Aug 28, 2012)

I find it hard to make a judgement, without having some idea of what she is actually pressuring him in to. I don't want the intricate details, but is it something that is more 'common' (like oral sex) or 'rare' (an unusual fetish for instance)? 
I don't think you should be forced to do something that is unusual, and not arousing to you. On the flip side, I think if you're withholding something that is commonly done, by virtually all demographics, which most people would expect to recieve when they decide to have sex with you, then you may have to accept that people will react in a negative manner, and that you may have to do certain things if you want to actually satisfy them.


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## Sacrieur (Jan 14, 2013)

Statistically girls have a harder time having an orgasm than men. They also like to have longer sessions of sex and tend to enjoy variety more. The clitoris is actually an organ completely devoted to pleasure with no other function.

It would be odd for a guy to not have enough pleasure during sex. For men it's more of a release. Which isn't to say it's not possible to have the roles reversed.

My response is perfectly reasonable. He's Christian, but oh wait he wants to have premarital sex so let's forget about that. Oh but the girlfriend wants to have more fun during sex. NOPE! He's Christian and they don't do that kind of thing.

It screams double standard.


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## General Specific (Mar 4, 2008)

I would hardly consider changing positions kinky. You should try new things with your girlfriend though. You may even like them..


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## panopticon (Nov 14, 2010)

Sacrieur said:


> Statistically girls have a harder time having an orgasm than men. They also like to have longer sessions of sex and tend to enjoy variety more. The clitoris is actually an organ completely devoted to pleasure with no other function.
> 
> It would be odd for a guy to not have enough pleasure during sex. For men it's more of a release. Which isn't to say it's not possible to have the roles reversed.
> 
> ...


There is no indication that the OP's girlfriend has had any difficulty achieving orgasm, nor that the OP has ever been opposed to pre-marital sex.


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## Sacrieur (Jan 14, 2013)

panopticon said:


> There is no indication that the OP's girlfriend has had any difficulty achieving orgasm, nor that the OP has ever been opposed to pre-marital sex.


I never made such a claim.

He's religious only when he feels like it. That's what I pointed out, he changes his morality based on what he wants it to be, not on what he actually bases it in.


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## panopticon (Nov 14, 2010)

Sacrieur said:


> I never made such a claim.
> 
> He's religious only when he feels like it. That's what I pointed out, he changes his morality based on what he wants it to be, not on what he actually bases it in.


How has he changed his morality?


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

imho it his body and he can choose what he want he feels hes comfortable with and no one should be pressured to do something they dont want to


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

I can help your girlfriend out. lol.


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## F1X3R (Jul 20, 2009)

panopticon said:


> How has he changed his morality?





life01 said:


> imho it his body and he can choose what he want he feels hes comfortable with and no one should be pressured to do something they dont want to


 He may not be the one being pressured in the relationship. Look at the way he's used religion against people in this thread. Shaming people, "forgiving" them.

But yet:



totalloner said:


> I probably should explain that I have devout Christian origins.





> I'm semi religious but nowhere near hardcore.
> I was brought up with the idea that sex was a kind of necessary evil in order to have children in marriage. Living with a partner before marriage was thought to be scandolous.
> But even now, after getting into Buddhism, I admire monks who can abstain from sex in order to focus on more important things. Celibacy is a kind of ideal which only some people can live up to. Not me unfortunately but still admire those who can.


Here's the truth:



totalloner said:


> I'm not really into this kinky stuff and I find it hard to even talk about in detail. *My needs are pretty straightforward* in the physical department. *Basically I'm satisfied *with the current arrangement. Different positions? I'm not a gymnast for god's sake!!


Maybe your GF can't live up to your ideals either, like the man always being on top?


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

life01 said:


> imho it his body and he can choose what he want he feels hes comfortable with and no one should be pressured to do something they dont want to


That's true. However, he shouldn't be surprised if she chooses to leave him.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

nubly said:


> That's true. However, he shouldn't be surprised if she chooses to leave him.


 agreed imho isnt that another form of pressure?


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## sadgirl95 (Apr 9, 2013)

You should keep an open mind but dont do anything your not comfortable with


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## Reinah (Apr 10, 2013)

totalloner said:


> I'm not really into this kinky stuff and I find it hard to even talk about in detail. My needs are pretty straightforward in the physical department. *Basically I'm satisfied with the current arrangement.* Different positions? I'm not a gymnast for god's sake!!


seems a bit selfish.


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## Reinah (Apr 10, 2013)

life01 said:


> agreed imho isnt that another form of pressure?


umm..no?

She has every right to leave him if they're not sexually compatible, and if she chooses to do this it's not her "pressuring" him. Her sexual needs are just as valid as his.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

Reinah said:


> umm..no?
> 
> She has every right to leave him if they're not sexually compatible, and if she chooses to do this it's not her "pressuring" him. Her sexual needs are just as valid as his.


 she should leave him, not use the threat of a breakup to increase the pressure to get what she wants


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## Reinah (Apr 10, 2013)

life01 said:


> she should leave him, not use the threat of a breakup to increase the pressure to get what she wants


No one said she should.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Yeah, pressuring for sexual favors doesn't work so well. That will only result in some really horrible sex.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

Reinah said:


> No one said she should.


 sorry i misunderstood (sad face)


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

AussiePea said:


> Or anal


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## tbyrfan (Feb 24, 2011)

^ omg EVERY TIME. EVERY TIME THAT DOG SCARES THE CRAP OUT OF ME


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## Icebat (Oct 16, 2011)

totalloner said:


> I'm not really into this kinky stuff and I find it hard to even talk about in detail. My needs are pretty straightforward in the physical department. Basically I'm satisfied with the current arrangement. Different positions? I'm not a gymnast for god's sake!!


You don't need to be a gymnast to try different positions without it causing pain. I'm not supple at all, yet I tried several positions with my ex and I enjoyed it every time.


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