# Who here is the black sheep or the only unsuccessful member of the family?



## Setolac (Jul 26, 2009)

Everyone in my family are outspoken extroverts who have a successful career. Both of my parents are extroverts who can basically talk to anyone. All of them has so much experience in life and they have interesting stories to talk about. They have successful careers that gain a lot of money. Everyone are normal with no mental illnesses and are married with a significant other. They are popular and have a lot of friends and acquaintances.

I'm the only introvert. What makes it worse is that I am socially awkward with a boring dull personality which is topped of by social anxiety and probably avoidant personality disorder. 



It is understandable that an introverted person who has some issues such as mental issues like social anxiety and depression would most probably inherit or acquire it from other family members such as parents but in my case I am the only one who has this.

Tell me, What do you think is the meaning of this? Why does this thing happen? Is this some sort of a sign or what? I am baffled by this phenomenon. I am nothing like my parents. It's like I am adopted but it is clear that I am not.


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## TryingMara (Mar 25, 2012)

Introverted or not, all my family members are pretty successful. I'm the only one who isn't. Where I am in life compared to them is embarrassing, and I feel that shame whenever I'm around them.


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## Hallowed Ground (Dec 1, 2013)

Same with a successful sister and many cousins and i'm currently the quiet, socially anxious, jobless uni dropout, who still doesn't have a gf.
But i couldn't care less about half my family, don't see em too much.


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## aquariusrising (May 19, 2014)

My mother is my only family member I grew up with. She didn't have a really successful life, but she worked a lot. Is a bum now like me, but she is tough minded and done so much more than me.
My stepfather has done so much too. A bum now as well like me. 
My other family members went onto university, pretty successful or had a lot of jobs. I'm completely the odd one out. Never worked at my age 

They love nagging on to me how I've "never lived life" and "don't know what life is about" as one of their many insults when I stick up for myself with the absolute **** they throw at me. They gang up together, which gives me no chance or ever winning. My step father is a little **** *******. Can't stand him. Treats me and especially my mother, like ****


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## SophieOP (May 26, 2014)

Setolac said:


> Everyone in my family are outspoken extroverts who have a successful career. Both of my parents are extroverts who can basically talk to anyone. All of them has so much experience in life and they have interesting stories to talk about. They have successful careers that gain a lot of money. Everyone are normal with no mental illnesses and are married with a significant other. They are popular and have a lot of friends and acquaintances.
> 
> I'm the only introvert. What makes it worse is that I am socially awkward with a boring dull personality which is topped of by social anxiety and probably avoidant personality disorder.
> 
> ...


I'm in the same boat as you. It's so awful being surrounded by a wildly successful family, but being completely useless. I'm confused about it too.

Both of my parents and all three of my siblings are extroverted and have lots of friends. My parents both have great careers, and my siblings are all heading towards great futures as well. I'm the only one that struggles in school, has no plans for college, and no marketable skills. I feel like such a disappointment to them.


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## T Studdly (Jul 20, 2013)

I'm the family loser pretty much.


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## OutsideR1 (Mar 13, 2014)

Thankfully my family is so ****ed up that I am not even close to the bottom lol.

I also wouldn't be the first to commit suicide if i cant take it anymore.


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## ACorvus (Dec 17, 2013)

My family all take drugs, are alcoholics, do nothing.
I am not exempt of course, I have gone through drug use when I was younger but decided to stop wasting my time with ****ed up losers and am at uni working my way out my crappy part time job. It's not easy when no one wants to see you succeed but I am not ending up like them, my brother in particular. 4 kids, taken off him due to his abusive wife and a foster mother not allowed back into the country.
Screw that.
I do not talk to them.
Just keep on going, it sucks having no help (trust me on this one) but at least one day you can say you did it all on your own.


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## LolaViola (Jun 23, 2013)

I feel like a failure in comparison to my relatives. I have a cousin who is like five years younger than me. She's in college, works, sings, write songs, plays the guitar, has subscribers on YouTube, and performs all over New York. My aunt recently told me that she even has a music video. And then there's me. Nothing special to report.


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## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Pretty much. My brothers are normal, personable, extremely likeable. But then again, I was sort of raised by a black sheep of another family, my dad.


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## W A N D E R L U S T (Oct 2, 2012)

ME! Haha 

Both my sisters have jobs, one with a successful hotel company, the other at a new frozen yoghurt place near the beach. One's scoring really high marks in uni and the other is getting straight A's in grade 9. And they're both so much prettier than me! Mum and dad have both lived such extraordinary lives too and are so cute with each other! My whole family are extroverts except for me and can make a new friend with anyone within 2 minutes. But it doesn't phase me all that much any more and I honestly don't know why? Maybe I'm just happy for them? Maybe it's because I have different dreams to them? Maybe it's because my versions of happiness and success are different to theirs? Haha, but I'm happy with how I am even if they don't approve some of the time


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## knight1985 (May 28, 2013)

I am. Big time.


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## Steinerz (Jul 15, 2013)

Me. No one acknowledges me. If I say something it is overlooked. When someone else says something it gets praised. I am also one of the only people in my family with black hair. Besides my mother. So I tend to literally feel like the black sheep.


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## Lacking Serotonin (Nov 18, 2012)

Me me me.


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## 3 AM (Mar 29, 2014)

Meeee!!!! At least my sibling works at a grocery store, I have nothing. w00t!


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

Yes I am. But...not only am I a black sheep in my family, but my extended family, my family's friends, my entire ethnicity even. My ethnicity places an enormous emphasis on academic and career success. We're all expected to pretty much become doctors or we are branded failures. Guess which one I am? 

Then apart from that, they also place a huge emphasis on getting married (especially to someone from your same ethnicity) and having children who will then repeat the process of becoming doctors and marrying in their race, etc.

I am not only a failure in my education and earning potential, but a failure in getting a girl. I am an absolute failure at women, and I am not even remotely interested in women from my ethnicity (mostly because of my aloofness from my ethnicity). If I ever did get a girl, I'd want to date/marry outside my race and if I had children, raise them as far away from my ethnicity as possible. 

It is one reason why I feel very distant and sometimes hatred for my ethnicity, thus giving me identity issues and furthering my anxiety and depression.


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## lynnette546 (Jun 4, 2014)

All of my siblings are successful, well rounded, and overall amazing people! And then there's me.... 

I am the youngest of my siblings however, so I think this is a fairly common feeling to have. My siblings are much older than I am, and have had more time to settle into their careers. I am constantly feeling pressured to finish school faster, to find a good career, and to be successful. It becomes tiring after a while....

:sus


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## tooljunkie (May 31, 2014)

Mental illness can skip generations. Maybe your grand or great grandparents had some form of mental illness. I didn't find out until I was an adult and heard through casual conversation with my grandmother that my grandmother on my fathers side may have had some sort of mental illness. I didn't pay too much attention back then so I'm not sure what she had. 
I consider myself the black sheep, not because I'm unsuccessful or anything. I'm probably one of the most successful financial wise in my family history, which is also one of the reasons I'm the black sheep but more so that I'm too mysterious, quiet, emotionally guarded or as I know it, socially awkward. Even though I have social anxiety I don't let people walk over me either. So it shocks a few of my family members when I stand up for myself.


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## chessman6500 (Sep 5, 2013)

Me. Everybody else in my family has things I don't, even my cousins who are 5 years younger than me.


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## SuperSaiyanGod (Jan 21, 2014)

That's not something I have to worry about. I come from a family of mediocrity. Although, when it comes to women, I'm almost positive I'm the only male in my family who's an almost 30 year old 'never dated/never had sex' virgin. Also, when it comes to my family, there would be quite a few candidates for the black sheep role before my name would ever be brought up.


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## Catty (Jan 4, 2010)

I'm the black sheep of the family. It's a relief knowing that people on here share the same feelings as I do.


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## 15 feet (Jun 8, 2014)

People and society have their way of defining success.

Most people would agree that getting a degree in a lucrative respective field, getting a high paying job, married with kids, a big house, a luxurious car are proofs of success.

By that standard, I am a failure. I have a younger brother who accomplished all of the above minus the college degree in respective field (he's a car mechanic). Normally I wouldn't care and all but family members always gotta rub it on me that I should be ashamed that my younger sibling has already accomplished more than I did.

I did a get a college degree but couldn't find a stable career from it (psychology is hardly lucrative or respectable)...

Eventually I wanted to transcend the idea of desiring success and I did. I became more focused on appreciating what I already have. It's a nice principle to live by because I could have joined the dark side and try to be preoccupied with the main steam idea of success.

Futility is caring too much to live to abstract ideals.


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