# Frustrated artists unite!



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Any other frustrated artists in here? I've been playing guitar for about 5 years and don't really have a "repertoire"... I mostly know riffs and fragments of songs. I'm also sloppy and my picking sucks. And don't ask me about how I play piano :um


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

To be fair I do know a few songs on bass, but then again that's easy to say when it's the same few notes for most of the song.


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

I've been really into drawing since I was a little kid. People thought I had talent at a young age, but at some point I hit a plateau and its been hard ever since. Really depressing to see 14 year olds who draw way better than me on deviantart. Even if I practiced 6 hours a day not sure I would ever improve enough


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## noctilune (Jun 8, 2015)

I used to draw quite often, too. Since I started my job, though, I have had a hard time getting motivated to work on my art  I really need to start making art a priority again.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)




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## killahwail (Apr 16, 2015)

slyfox said:


> I've been really into drawing since I was a little kid. People thought I had talent at a young age, but at some point I hit a plateau and its been hard ever since. Really depressing to see 14 year olds who draw way better than me on deviantart. Even if I practiced 6 hours a day not sure I would ever improve enough


I'm usually doodling in my journal when I am most sad. I never would draw otherwise. The free expression is what makes me most happy. Putting boundaries or comparing abilities and trying too hard can cripple that freefom of expression. Thats my opinion anyway. My cousin is good at art, like really good, but he's always criticizing himself even though his portraits are like photographs. Really puzzles me. I wish he could see what I see. Sometimes wanting to be 'professional' (e.g making money of it takes the fire out of the artist). I paid for commission artwork once, and the artist had so many requests, she was a bit frustrated. I felt bad that art becoming her job was not as romantic as I thought it would have been for someone who was a professional artist. I think if you feel you're an artist, you are an artist.> Bless all you artists out there, i Hope you find your happiness.


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## acidicwithpanic (May 14, 2014)

I'm currently unemployed as a professional musician so yes I'm a starving artist.


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## bad baby (Jun 10, 2013)

i can play, like, two songs on the guitar. both of them awfully. I WIN.


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## oldmancane (Jul 17, 2014)

I'm a songwriter.. I've hit a hard spot of writer's block. On the bright side, though, before this writer's block, I wrote one of the best things I've ever written .


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## TabbyTab (Oct 27, 2013)

I don't think frustrated is the word I'd use for myself... More like lazy and unmotivated


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

Yeah I suck bad. Recording is frustrating when you suck. Taking 50 takes for one solo really gets me.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

I really suck. I'll keep doing stuff anyway but yeah, it's depressing, and I don't really improve.


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## PathologicalSigher (Mar 22, 2015)

I once read a book on economics in which Marx was described as "morbidly perfectionist," which I thought described me really well also. 

I'd like to publish some of my writings before I die, but unfortunately it takes me a really, really, really long time to write anything. I've been working on the same short story for the past two years or so, and it's still not finished. I'll spell-check everything, line by line, just because I don't trust the computer's spell-check. I constantly question my word choice, sentence construction, style, content, etc. I'll write, erase, and rewrite a sentence twenty times before I'm finally (somewhat) satisfied with it. I really am insane.

It makes me wonder if I'll ever finish anything.


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## uziq (Apr 9, 2012)

I had a decent chance of going somewhere with my music back a few years back, but some copyright bs with Youtube happened and that pretty much killed my fanbase, as well as my drive to make music. Haven't really done anything significant with music since. Just been buying various pieces of equipment / instruments and recording experimental diddles that will likely never go beyond my hard drive.


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

I might have the potential to become a decent musician if I stick with bass. I'd really love to be a keyboardist, there's so many sounds available to you whether you're playing an organ or a synth, but my muscle memory is just awful.

I've been messing around for a few years, and as soon as I take my eyes away from the keyboard I have no idea where all the notes are at. oh and I'm still sloppy even when I'm just playing with my right hand.


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

visualkeirockstar said:


> Yeah I suck bad. Recording is frustrating when you suck. Taking 50 takes for one solo really gets me.


That's always been a problem for me too. That and playing in front of other people :afr It's like I become even more self-conscious about my playing and my sloppiness gets even worse.



Persephone The Dread said:


> I really suck. I'll keep doing stuff anyway but yeah, it's depressing, and I don't really improve.


I've tried giving up a few times, but there's always an urge to start playing again no matter how frustrated I get, so that's been my attitude for a while too. Art, not even once? :|



PathologicalSigher said:


> I'll spell-check everything, line by line, just because I don't trust the computer's spell-check. I constantly question my word choice, sentence construction, style, content, etc. I'll write, erase, and rewrite a sentence twenty times before I'm finally (somewhat) satisfied with it. I really am insane.
> 
> It makes me wonder if I'll ever finish anything.


I don't do creative writing but those are all things I do when writing papers or even just posting on here.


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## DistraughtOwl (Mar 1, 2014)

I go through moments where I feel (and even sound) like a fantastic singer. But other times I feel so awful overall and just want to give up.

I haven't given up yet... Not when I have songs to finish still at least. And as long as I continue to have people who are interested in collaborating with me then I'll continue to sing/write songs. I guess anyway.


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## FauxReaL (May 18, 2015)

Yeah. I feel it. I have been rapping for 5 years but can barely freestyle. I'm pretty dope at writing verses and my flow/style, I'm told, is unique... but I still don't think I'll ever release a full on album. I've put out mixtapes and EPs, but my interest in rapping is shifting to producing. I feel like I do this with every hobby I've had. Hit a certain ceiling of skill level, then fall back and find something else. I got into graffiti because of hip-hop, got into rapping cuz of graffiti and beats because of rapping.


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

Have been feeling like I should give up and only treat art as a hobby. There still is a small part of me that thinks there is still hope if I'm willing to practice for an insane amount of hours. I lack energy to do much though, so it is getting tempting to give up.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Can I call myself a frustrated artist if my work is worse than many people who have just started? I'm an artist in the sense that everyone is.


Why does life always suck so much? I'm going to tear my ears off and chuck them at people. Sadly I only have two, so I'll have to make these count.


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## truant (Jul 4, 2014)

I've been writing pretty much daily for about 2 1/2 years now and I'm just _starting_ to not feel so frustrated. I'm still not making any money, really, but I'm starting to feel like I'm getting the hang of the process of writing.

There's no substitute for practice. And there are lots and lots of plateaus. You just have to grind through them.


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## Quirky (Jul 27, 2014)

I've tried my fair share of art back in high school, but it always came out as mediocre at best. I just tried to rush through everything anxiously back then, so I probably lost some precious time to improve my artistic skills and now it is all terrible as a result of not slowing down. Just need to save up for a tablet to finally dive into digital art, it would serve as a good hobby.


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## S a m (Jan 5, 2015)

Barakiel said:


> I mostly know riffs and fragments of songs.


This is pretty much how I am. I only learn how to play a certain part of a song that I like, never the whole song haha. Well, there's only one song I know completely and it's really easy. I really don't bother to practice a lot on my guitar though.


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## identificationunknown (Jan 23, 2014)

I have been writing and writing for the last 5 years but it's not working actually. I m really struggling with flow.


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## Cherrycarmine (Apr 19, 2015)

I'm currently trying to learn how to draw and it's quite difficult(especially drawing people and certain animals, like cats for example). But I want to keep practicing because drawing is something I've wanted to do for a long time.


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## Vividly (Aug 11, 2014)

Played piano since i was 3 years old, self taught. Can't seem to fully compose a song or learn a full song without stopping barely halfway through. I always feel like i'm incredibly bad and i'm always unmotivated unless i'm high on some drug. -.-;


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

does former (not professional) artist count? I used to draw, what happened was that I was in a very stressful situation and drawing was my way of relaxing, plus I had to finish the painting but never did because the idiot involved in the serious situation kept bothering me about the situation when I was painting, I could tell it was affecting the way I was painting so I put the brush down, the idiot continued talking, I got mad and just stood up and left. That was the last time I did art. That was 11 years ago. there has been a few attempts but they all turned into failed attempts, lack of skills, no motivation, no passion, no patience, I don't have it in me anymore. It's long gone. The last 2 times I did it, it only led to binge eating. Drawing now triggers binge eating, frustration of not doing it correctly or as good as I used to leads to binge eating. That's why my therapist told me to totally AVOID drawing, even if it means for the rest of my life. Here's the incomplete painting. I could only draw what I saw, not from my head.

http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f37/incomplete-painting-940465/


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

now let's all agree to never be creative again


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Barakiel said:


> now let's all agree to never be creative again


Oh my god, why didn't I post that here?


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## Martimnp (Aug 20, 2013)

Barakiel said:


> To be fair I do know a few songs on bass, but then again that's easy to say when it's the same few notes for most of the song.


Hahaha I'm a bass player and I should be offended by that, but it's cool  What songs do you know?


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Martimnp said:


> Hahaha I'm a bass player and I should be offended by that, but it's cool  What songs do you know?


Oh I didn't mean anything bad by that! Memories by Public Image Ltd. comes to mind, I think that's only four notes.


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## Martimnp (Aug 20, 2013)

Barakiel said:


> Oh I didn't mean anything bad by that! Memories by Public Image Ltd. comes to mind, I think that's only four notes.


Hahaha no problem  Yaeh, when a song is easy on bass it is really easy, but when it's hard....


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

I think I'm getting really bored just playing by myself and having no one to jam with. Also it seems like playing guitar is more of a habit sometimes than something I genuinely enjoy doing. :|


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## RaeWolf (Jul 26, 2015)

I used to draw all the time a couple years ago, but now my depression has made me very uninspired. :/ My dream used to be becoming a graphic novel or webcomic artist, but I don't know if I'll be able to do that anymore.


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## Staticnz (Mar 25, 2013)

Yeah! I've been playing guitar since 16. Been teaching bass for the past half year, but had to take a break because I got a different job.


In a band playing bass and doing vocals.

Just wish I was more productive..


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

I can learn stuff by ear pretty easily, but that almost always ruins the song for me, like I get tired of it real easily if I'm listening to it over and over again to figure out the melody and all that. :|


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

I've written/recorded 3 albums now but none really done what's required to promote them/myself due to a combination of SA/depression/poverty. I go to jams from time to time but haven't really played with a group that felt as tight & passionate as the ones I was in in high school. My old neighbour has been asking me to play lead guitar in his cover band which pays decently for a few years now but playing covers usually bores me to death as it's like those radio stations that play the same songs all day everyday. That said I may well take him up on it in the near future if I can get my gear back into a state of functionality from the state of disrepair it's all fallen into now


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

It seems like whenever I hear a cool guitar riff, I get a really bad urge to try and learn how to play it myself, and I just can't sit back and enjoy it. It's like playing guitar has in some ways ruined listening to music for me D:


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## Famous (Sep 6, 2011)

I've been in a few bands in the past, but not played regularly for a couple of years, I always think that one needs to practice 4 hours a day every day to be decent.


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## zoslow (Jun 2, 2014)

Barakiel said:


> It seems like whenever I hear a cool guitar riff, I get a really bad urge to try and learn how to play it myself, and I just can't sit back and enjoy it. It's like playing guitar has in some ways ruined listening to music for me D:


That's how I feel too many times. Fun to know I'm not the only one!

I wouldn't really say I'm frustrated. I mean I feel grateful for the things I accomplished. I'm never going to be super awesome at playing guitar but 10 years of playing it has payed off and I have a reportoire of 100's of songs I can play, I've written or started writing on around 20-30 songs or so and well yeah I think a few at least are pretty good, could even become big hits if released.

I am a bit irritated though that I cannot get in a band cause it's hard to find people to play with and I guess my SA is holding me back as well. Also I can't find people to collaborate with, not even online. No idea why that's so difficult.


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## nonethemore (Oct 18, 2010)

.


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## Paperback Writer (Feb 7, 2015)

I've been writing for over two years now. I've managed to get a rough first draft done for a few novels, but I struggle to make them into anything coherent beyond that. I've recently managed to get myself into the habit of forcing myself to write 2500 words a day, so that's something. I loved writing when I was a kid and wish it came as naturally to me now as it did back then.

I've also been playing guitar for a similar amount of time. I'm not particularly good at it, but I've written about 40 songs, and I like to think that a few of them are pretty decent. By law of averages at least some of them have to be.


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## WeDisintegrate (Aug 29, 2015)

Been writing Black Metal songs for the past few years in a band (two man). Recently quit, though agreed to help them finish writing an album that we were part the way through sorting.

Been playing guitar for 12 years and, all though I love the music that we were playing, recently I have had no inspiration and cannot encourage myself to pick up the guitar to write something.
Everything feels like it's going no where since we're still playing in a garage after 5 years of writing. I've been made to feel guilty about leaving but it feels like the right decision to me.

I still love the idea of writing and recording my own stuff but I suppose I have to wait for the inspiration to hit me which may not be at the most opportune time (like at work).


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## Watching (Aug 7, 2015)

I draw. Rudimentary stuff. black and white only, mostly a leftover skill from technical drawing. Lots of sharp perspective and the like. Pretty good at natural backgrounds for some reason I can't fathom.
Writing. 
Writing is the hell that takes most of my life energy and converts it into a syntax of flavored perfectly distilled self doubt and loathing and lets me amplify anxiety to a point that I regret it instantly. Then I keep going.

I've 12 separate projects that since 2013 I've slowly built into around 4 completed novels, with the remaining 8 being around 340, 450, 210, 160, 212, 90, 390 and 201 pages long. My novels average around 50k words to 90k total so they can vary a bit.

I can church work out pretty fast, and correct it fairly fast as well. All the staples apple, 12 point font, 250 words per page double spacing etc. All pages paragraphed justified spellchecked and numbered. 
I work at it. Haven't ever approached a publisher or sent a manuscript, but for the last few years whenever I get to a low point, which is basically constant I write.
The result is around 4000 pages of manuscript scattered across 12 books, of varying genres and page counts, built from a furnace of depression, rage and apathy leaving the writing. For the most part writing is just the sheer byproduct of the only coping mechanism I've ever have for 14 years of near suicide and almost shooting sprees.

I write to cope and often I can't cope with writing between 30 hours per two day span, often in a row to stave off the worst feelings in the world, that sadly make up the sheer majority of my time on this one. I've starved for it. Missed appointments for it, stood up friends for it. Ignored bills and rent for it. I've collapsed from it.
It can be really difficult to explain how to someone who doesn't do it the way I do it, how utterly destructive something that keeps all of the other worst things away can be when it acts as a lightning rod for all the worst things a person can deal with.
I get the feeling when they find my body it will be in the dark corner of a room somewhere on an old Dvorak keyed Olympus typeset with ink ribbon stains and what was once everything I ever was as a human being rotting on the floor, forgotten for all but the last lame attempt at making something out of my soon to be extinct existence while knowing that as the last person in my family I'd be solely responsible got the genocide of my entire family name.

All for the sake of needing to put the pages OUT of my damn head.


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## groor (Sep 24, 2015)

:smile2:


MobiusX said:


> does former (not professional) artist count? I used to draw, what happened was that I was in a very stressful situation and drawing was my way of relaxing, plus I had to finish the painting but never did because the idiot involved in the serious situation kept bothering me about the situation when I was painting, I could tell it was affecting the way I was painting so I put the brush down, the idiot continued talking, I got mad and just stood up and left. That was the last time I did art. That was 11 years ago. there has been a few attempts but they all turned into failed attempts, lack of skills, no motivation, no passion, no patience, I don't have it in me anymore. It's long gone. The last 2 times I did it, it only led to binge eating. Drawing now triggers binge eating, frustration of not doing it correctly or as good as I used to leads to binge eating. That's why my therapist told me to totally AVOID drawing, even if it means for the rest of my life. Here's the incomplete painting. I could only draw what I saw, not from my head.
> 
> http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f37/incomplete-painting-940465/


Thank you for sharing your story. I go through similar pain. I, too, am someone who feels frustrated before the canvas.

I did like your last painting, Mobius. _I_ saw the vague impression of a temple, naturally carved into the side of a mountain, with such gentle hues and scenery. It was very much like a place I would like to sit and be at peace with. Painless for my eyes, and traumatic to you, I understand.

I also binge eat, or reach for an anti-anxiety pill when my life frustrates me so hard that my temperature is rising and my breathing is shallow and I cannot handle being left alone with my thoughts. Comfort, I reach for any sort of comfort. I agonize over a piece of paper that someone would mistake for a kindergartner's scribbling.

Inside of me there is something trapped. Inside of you there is something trapped. It's still inside, it is not evaporated, only hibernating. And sometimes throbbing to be let out.

I was discharged from a hospital on September 1st, and one of my therapy goals was to complete a painting of myself in an ideal life. And so I began to draw the sea, and then I was lost again. Frustrated, angry, demotivated. Ashamed that my work resembles nothing real.

So I decided to paint through it. I decided that I would paint and **** up the canvas and let go of idealism and paint what was really going on. A nasty blight in my world, on my canvas, reaching out to corrupt the sea and the tree and the cloud of dreams I tried to draw to represent something beautiful about myself that I don't even believe is real. 25 days, still lost, and still coloring.

I believe in we frustrated artists, in our expression, in whatever instrument each of us chooses to unleash our creativity with. Clay, paint, piano, dance, construction, singing, on and on. I believe that if we keep on, we will discover, improve and refine. And it will be _ours_. We frustrated artists are struggling against our idiosyncrasies that lay buried deep inside of us, clashing with the world we've been taught is reality. What is real? What is "good enough"?

We have to create.


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## GreyWorld (Oct 8, 2015)

I've been doing art since I was a child. I'm good at a few things, but I really wish I was better at drawing. I can't do portraits at all. Drawing the human figure is a real struggle for me, and it never looks right. And lately I can barely draw anything at all. I really want to, but I'm not the least bit inspired to come up with any cool ideas. Occasionally, I picture something in my head, and it looks awesome, but then when I try to draw it, suddenly there is nothing there, no mental image, nothing. It's very depressing for me. I have been able to do other types of art, such as sculpting, but only very little. It's not enjoyable for me anymore. Nothing is, really. I just do stuff to fill up the time and not because I actually enjoy it.


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

I am a writer but nobody's interested in my work, so what's the point. :sigh

They say you should write for yourself first, but there is just no fulfillment or fun in writing a bunch of crap nobody's ever going to read. (And I have written a LOT of crap that nobody's ever going to read. Not for any lack of my trying to get them to read it, though.) I can far more easily just keep it all in my head.

I am no good at any other types of art. And I guess, based on the utter lack of readership, I can't be that good at writing, either. :/


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

tehuti88 said:


> I am a writer but nobody's interested in my work, so what's the point. :sigh


I actually stumbled across some of your stuff back when I was just a lurker here. That was around the same time I had a mythology class back in high school though, and there's a lot of bad memories from that class (I still remember some painfully embarrassing presentations I had to give :afr) so yeah, for a time anything dealing with Egyptian mythology or Jungian archetypes and stuff reminded me of that. So as dumb as this may sound, that was really the only thing that put me off of your stories.

I'm still not a very good reader now (I blame my ADD for that) but I think I'll check out some of your work sometime tonight. Welcome back btw


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