# Family of Hate



## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

I'm not exactly sure what to do. Reaching out to anybody that can help me.

My family has done alot of harm to me. Mainly because I'm pretty advanced. I have the ability to do alot of good for this world. To make alot of money for myself. And even help alot of poor people.

My family has put me through so much abuse. Calling me names. Putting me down. The list goes on and on. All because of what? Being different. Being what they feel they can't be? I don't understand it. So many parents would appreciate having a child that wants to do great things for themselves and the planet.

I know for a fact that I could be doing so much more. Living such a great life. But I end up living on the streets. All because of all the negativity/abuse I've experienced from my family. Mainly because I don't know how to just live. Alone in this world. With my family being my biggest enemy. It makes things so much harder. And I have no idea why.


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## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

It's hard to function generally. And it has especially affected my ability to function socially. It's one thing for society in general to put down and abuse people who are advanced. But for family to be the main ones doing it is even worse. They are the ones that are supposed to be protecting their kids from it, and yet they're the ones who are the most abusive.


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## alkeith (Aug 14, 2013)

I'm really sorry it must have been really terrible to have family like that. As for me, my family wasn't filled with hatred or anything they just wasn't there for me when I need support or anything. My mother is pretty much emotionally draining and just keep want to argue with everyone and keep pissing me off and I have no idea how i stand all that for 5 years. And my dad wasn't really around as my parent is divorced and now he's remarried. He does give me money but what's point of having money when you don't really enjoy life


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## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

Thank you. Right it's not about money. I just don't know what to do about this whole situation that my family put me in. I ended up living on the streets because of them. They're making tons of money. And I am homeless because of everything you put me through.


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## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

I'm not sure how to not let it affect me so much. I just want justice. All the crap they put me through. All everything. I just want to be able to live.


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## Just Here (Jul 16, 2013)

Let it go. Move forward without them there will be no satisfaction in getting even it will just make them feel better about hurting you. They probably live to make your life worth ****. Go forward for yourself you deserve it. Close the door a little tighter and stop worry what they think. Show them your above them by being the most you can be.


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## Osiris3212 (Jun 18, 2013)

*Hi*

Yeah, I know... I am struggling with this. My parents made me homeless for over 4 years. I had to goto college to be able to afford rent, but I'm not a good student, so I can't goto college anymore, now my dad lets me live in the attic on his house that's being foreclosed. They act like they are doing me a favor. They aren't losing money, they just decided to let me live. They invest their money into scams, they invest in anything except me. 
I know what I want to do the rest of my life, and they go spend their money on a scam. It's their money, but I have a plan and I'm not a con artist. It comes down to the fact that my parents can't parent. Instead of trying, they get mad at me for being alive. 
I spend what life I have left trying to think about how I will survive in this world. I can't hire a family, and I couldn't afford it. I don't have any friends. Our whole world is designed to be anti social. We don't get together and solve problems. We sit around, get fat, and blame others. 
I want to be different then them, so do you, I imagine. That's why we have these ideas that can change the world, and that's why they have to negate us. We prove them wrong, because we write and think things out. 
Since I don't have money, it comes down to one thing. Words. If you have the words typed out to accomplish what you envision, you have the blue print. I can't believe that money is an issue, because everyone tells me I am too poor, but I can't stop trying. If I die, I want to die next to my old friends and family, the people who denied me because I was poor. I want them to see my body, when they continue to over eat, living in fear because they are so out of touch. They are the ones who are failing. Success is not a dead end job, a dead end job is prison. They have to reject you, because the life they lead is fake, and you don't want to live like that. I like to read Seth Godin books, he talks about this kinda stuff. "Linchpin" is a good one, and "Poke the Box". If you don't like reading, I suggest audiobooks.
Maybe you, like me, have these ideas that can help people and make the world a better and safer place. That's why we are held back, because it goes against their fake life. We must succeed, we must get these ideas on paper. I'm not sure how to sell it yet though. We must do it for other people like us. To prevent it from happening again.
I have not failed because I never got to try. I stay up late every night, trying to try. It's amazing, if you work just a little bit towards your goal, you will notice that no one is working at all. 
Most people want to pay the bills and watch TV, well I hate TV. 
They stuff themselves full of food, watch TV, and pass out. It's not hard to be better then them, but I want to take it a step further, I want to be everything they are not. I want to be a good person, learn everyday, and love people. I don't know what love is, but I'm going to try, and that's more then my parents have ever done for me.
I also have to be nice to them, just because they are horrible people doesn't mean I have to be. It's really hard work, I wish I had more answers.
Remember to enjoy your struggle, some people don't have a struggle. They get handed everything we work hard to accomplish, and they usually lose it because they didn't appreciate it. I don't want to see the rich get rich, I want to hire people like us, because we show up and work hard. We have passion.


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## Kavo (Aug 16, 2013)

I'm in a similar boat, being kicked out at 18 after being deemed useless. I've spent a year now just simmering over all the things that've happened but I'm just now finding the worth in making my own life work is much more important than blaming them or even myself 'till the bitter end. You said "I just want to live" part of that is giving up the specialness or entitlement which is a reaction or reflex to the degrading which you experienced. It's okay just to be human, and have that feeling of wanting to live freely be enough entitlement that you ever need. ^^


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## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

I need things to stay the way they are with my family. I don't want to succeed because my family finally got their act together. I want to succeed in spite of their hate and ignorance.


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## Just Here (Jul 16, 2013)

skillet said:


> I need things to stay the way they are with my family. I don't want to succeed because my family finally got their act together. I want to succeed in spite of their hate and ignorance.


Good for you. I hope you get it done!!


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## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

I need some help with feeling better. I just wish I had a better family that would help me with my life so that I could be successful. It's really hard for me to be alone. I have no financial help. I have no other form of support. And I need to figure out how be happy and functional publicly. The abuse I went through has made that extra difficult.


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## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Just Here said:


> Let it go. Move forward without them there will be no satisfaction in getting even it will just make them feel better about hurting you. They probably live to make your life worth ****. Go forward for yourself you deserve it. Close the door a little tighter and stop worry what they think. Show them your above them by being the most you can be.


I agree. I know it's harder then to just say "I'll just let this go", but I think it's important to try your best to change your focus. I know they've done you wrong, and it isn't okay. It's true they've contributed to your downfall, hurt, and hopelessness...but don't let them be the one thing that stands in your way. Don't give them that power over you, leaving you destitute and hurting, while they're off in their own world.

Also, try to overcome the thoughts of anger and vengeance, or that they're happy and successful so long as you're broke and unhappy. Try to set them apart from you, who you are and who you STILL can be. Try to focus on making yourself strong again, and to become independent. Try to set up goals to emancipate yourself from them. They've become something like a parasite to you, they continue to feed and hurt you despite being apart from them.

The best thing you can do right now, is work on getting them off your mind and trying to find something for you. Realizing that you still have the power in you to overcome and do what YOU wanted, and that they have no control over you, can help you overcome many things.

Also, have you tried any support groups in the area? Maybe stepping into something where you can associate with others in person, find some inspiration and work on your socializing? Even finding work, it may be a lower job position then you'd like, but we all start small and it's important to have some sort of financial backing AND social foundation. It can be very hard and annoying, but it's worth the character training and social practice, and of course any money is better then none. I know finding work right now is very difficult, but it's worth pursuing too, if you haven't already.

I think you made a wonderful step coming here. It may not seem much, being the internet, but it really is a step in realizing a problem and seeking guidance and understanding


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

I hate my family. They have done so much damage to me. 

At the same time, I'm trying to forget that I even have a family. They are people that I try to distance myself from.


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## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

Thanks for the advice. Yes it's bad to be around people who are dangerous and abusive which is what my family is about. I appreciate all the encouragement, and hope I can figure out how to get myself together.


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## scum (Jun 30, 2011)

I'm glad you realize that it's futile to waste any amount of energy on them. I know it's tricky since the trauma they've caused has put you at a disadvantage and in a seemingly helpless situation. Simply acknowledging their bigotry and abuse for what it is reveals that you embody a sensitivity that they lack. I hope you can find positive ways to harness your abilities even while having to overcome the obstacle of their aggravated mistreatment. You will have to source resolve in spite of them.


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## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

Thanks! I just want to close the door on them, and move forward freely. It's only something within me that keeps bringing them up that's causing my social anxiety and other hindrances.

They have been completely out of my life for a few years now. So the only thing that is affecting me is inside me. Like if I'm driving and hit a pot hole. I won't think anything of it, and keep driving. That's what my family is. Nothing, but a pot hole.

So I have to figure out how to just live and function regardless of their hate and abuse.


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## Kirit3 (Jul 30, 2013)

It's really hard to break out of the belief that our parents and family want the best for us when there really is no guarantee they would do so. Parents are not perfect, in fact some of them are completely crummy.

For me it helps to accept that they are crummy non-perfect people instead of wishing every night they would wake up tomorrow and magically decide to be nice. "Life is not a wish granting factory". 

I'm still terrified to go outside sometimes but that's my fault and my responsibility now, not theirs. I don't need them to help me and I don't need them to support me because they can't, we tried and it didn't work out. So I'll find people who will love and support me somewhere else. I'm still living with them and they're not supportive and it hurt. But I have to keep reminding myself that their opinion is not that important.


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## uselessgoodfornothing (Sep 10, 2013)

alkeith said:


> what's point of having money when you don't really enjoy life


thats it man. seriously. i get 290$ a week from the government. all i have to do is call up 6 places and ask for work and 1 day volenteer work a week. so ive got money, ive got free time, and i really dont care. i dont. what am i suposed to do? when you actually enjoy nothing. not one thing.

i always dreamed of buying whatever junk food i wanted when i was a kid, now i do, hoping this time, THIS TIME! ill enjoy the food. but nope.

i can buy any video games i want, but i dont even care

**** MAN, THIS ***** DRIVING ME CRAZY. NOTHING. NO PEACE, EVER. CONSTANT WORRYING. SEEN A PSYCOLOGIST FOR A YEAR, BEEN ON 8 DIFFERENT MEDS [mirtazepine, stelezine, paroxetine, fluoxetine - off the top of my head] NO CHANGE  NOTHING MAKES IT BETTER. NO ONE TO HELP. NO ONE CARES TRUELY ALONE AND NO POINT IN LIVING :'(


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## uselessgoodfornothing (Sep 10, 2013)

Kirit3 said:


> It's really hard to break out of the belief that our parents and family want the best for us when there really is no guarantee they would do so. Parents are not perfect, in fact some of them are completely crummy.
> 
> For me it helps to accept that they are crummy non-perfect people instead of wishing every night they would wake up tomorrow and magically decide to be nice. "Life is not a wish granting factory".
> 
> I'm still terrified to go outside sometimes but that's my fault and my responsibility now, not theirs. I don't need them to help me and I don't need them to support me because they can't, we tried and it didn't work out. So I'll find people who will love and support me somewhere else. I'm still living with them and they're not supportive and it hurt. But I have to keep reminding myself that their opinion is not that important.


**** that sucks dude  its even harder when they're constantly telling you how much they care and how much they LOVE YOU. non stop. its like brainwashing. so whenever i try to talk to them about how i really feel all they say is "we love you" 
"we love you" 
"we love you" 
"we love you"

over and over FUUUU 

but you know they dont, or they would have helped you when you were 16 and couldnt leave the house, but they didnt. its so hard when you face pure evil and it pretends to be good


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## uselessgoodfornothing (Sep 10, 2013)

DeeperUnderstanding said:


> I hate my family. They have done so much damage to me.
> 
> At the same time, I'm trying to forget that I even have a family. They are people that I try to distance myself from.


i am struggling with this, honestly. all my siblings and my parents are best buddys, but when it comes to me, i know they are bad people, but saying that doesnt stop them, they still lie to me and tell me they love me and that its my fault if i hate them, or its my fault im like this, and that i should be sorry for putting them through this, that i should be sorry for even asking for help! its hard when they're all successful and you have failed and they just laugh at you and dont care. i dont know what to do, how to fully separate myself from them. people always say "they're family, you HAVE to work things out" but why? i never liked my family, if i want to never see them again, isnt that okay?


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## skillet (Jul 8, 2013)

I don't want to see my family again. They will do anything short of tear off my limbs and head to prevent me from succeeding. And they have been more than enough of a bad influence on me.

It's been so hard to just focus on succeeding, but that's what I'm trying to figure out how to do. Just keep focusing on succeeding, and living the life I could have been living if not for them.


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