# sex with an ex?



## Laicos (Jun 24, 2005)

i know it says no sex, but i dont know where else to post this and im curious as to what people think. is it okay to have sex with your ex? we broke up a few weeks ago and both of us have agreed that there is no way we are going to get back together.. the thing is, its not easy to go from sex every other day to nada. i talked to her today, and she told me how she really missed having sex with me and that she wanted to... just as friends. its hard to say no for me because i really want to, but i just dont want to make the whole breaking up thing any harder.

she says she can do it without rekindling any old feelings for me, but im not sure if shes just saying that cuz she wants to have sex with me.


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## mserychic (Oct 2, 2004)

Generally speaking it's a bad idea. It's hard to have sex without emotions getting involved.. especially when you guys just broke up.


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## BeNice (Jan 2, 2004)

You're 18 and have had a sex life, and now you are pondering whether to have sex with your ex. Just be glad you don't wake up every morning dry humping your bed!


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## gwen (Feb 16, 2007)

BeNice said:


> You're 18 and have had a sex life, and now you are pondering whether to have sex with your ex. Just be glad you don't wake up every morning dry humping your bed!


LOL poor you :hug

Laicos - do not have sex with your ex-especially if you just broke up.


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## Mayflower 2000 (Nov 11, 2003)

My guess would be that, if you want to and she wants to, then its not necessarily a bad idea. Most people probably wouldn't simply because they wouldn't want to have sex with their recent ex... but everyones different. In a way it almost seems like a good time, because you have experience with them, have a close understanding already, and from a health standpoint not much more of a concern.


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## GTI79 (Feb 2, 2004)

go for it.


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## GaSS PaNiCC (Mar 27, 2007)

all in


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## leppardess (Nov 8, 2003)

*Re: re: sex with an ex?*



mserychic said:


> Generally speaking it's a bad idea. It's hard to have sex without emotions getting involved.. especially when you guys just broke up.


 :agree


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

It's hard, but if you really, truly think you can handle it, go ahead.

Come to think of it, I've never done this because my exes have always lived hundreds of miles away. Emotionally trepidacious territory, this.


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## nothing_to_say (Nov 21, 2006)

Yeah do it :yes (Lucky b*****d :lol )


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## SilentProphet (Jun 1, 2007)

BeNice said:


> You're 18 and have had a sex life, and now you are pondering whether to have sex with your ex. Just be glad you don't wake up every morning dry humping your bed!


LOL!!!!!!!!!!


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## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

I dont know, I tried that and it didnt work...usually doesnt. But who knows....maybe it will work for you.


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## Eraserhead (Sep 23, 2006)

I wouldn't, but who knows... :stu


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## BettyBoop90046 (Jun 25, 2007)

I have never known anyone to have this situation end well. Someone always winds up getting hurt.


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## Your Lover Scrub Ducky (Jul 26, 2004)

I avoided talking with my ex awhile after we split cause she allways brought up similar things (though she also wanted to get back together again, not just have sex) 

Personally, I wouldn't do it. I agree with the others, it would be hard to keep feelings out. Plus for me, its more than just that. Its like, you were together, now you're not, why should you still have sex? To me, a relationship with someone isn't something that can be on and off whenever, you know? Even if its just sex. If it is on and off, its like you're playing a game rather than taking it seriously and whenever you're bored, just take a break and play something else? :no If im with a girl and we broke up, even if a mutual agreement, that's it. No getting back together, no sex, nothing.

I dunno how to explain what I mean better than that. o well. Personally, I'd just save the sex for when I'm in a steady relationship...But its up to you and what you two want to do.


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## IcedOver (Feb 26, 2007)

Just go back to the fountain of relationship knowledge, "Seinfeld" and the classic episode where Jerry and Elaine try to rationalize sleeping together and still just being "friends" to know that it probably doesn't work to sleep with an ex if you just want to stay friends or don't want emotions to get involved. But if you just want to fulfill a physical need and don't care about feelings getting involved then go for it.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

it would be a bad idea for me. it took me a long time to get over my ex. having sex with would just bring old feelings back. id leave it to just giving her a hug and hanging out with her


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## SilentProphet (Jun 1, 2007)

Having no ex or sex life i'm really not one to comment. BUT if i did and she brought this up i Definetely wouldn't have sex with her, especially if she broke up with me. I'd never want to hear from her again and would defeinetly not still be in contact with her. I'm gonna die alone tho.


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## Laicos (Jun 24, 2005)

so i went for it and yea.. sex with an ex is a bad idea. well sorta... it was nice but she was wrong when she said it wouldnt bother her. she told me her feelings for me were coming back so we agreed to end it. so it was sort of a bad idea but nothing bad really happened. and well.. we did both get laid. but yea, i think its probably better to just end it and move on once ya break up with someone..


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## Razorblade Kiss (Oct 29, 2006)

If she claims she can handle it, do it. My friend was talking about having sex with an ex and he would tell her to sign a paper saying she wouldn't get emotional or something like that. It was funny.


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## Razorblade Kiss (Oct 29, 2006)

Laicos said:


> so i went for it and yea.. sex with an ex is a bad idea. well sorta... it was nice but she was wrong when she said it wouldnt bother her. she told me her feelings for me were coming back so we agreed to end it. so it was sort of a bad idea but nothing bad really happened. and well.. we did both get laid. but yea, i think its probably better to just end it and move on once ya break up with someone..


Oh. :lol I made my last comment before I noticed there was a second page to this thread.

Not surprised she was catching feelings for you again...


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## SusanStorm (Oct 27, 2006)

I would say no because an ex is an ex and things could get complicated..
But it does work for some people..I would never do it...


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## roswell (Feb 4, 2006)

I can't say with certainty that this will not work out well, because there's always a chance it could.

What I can say with certainty is that it will not work out the way you THINK it will work out.

That part's a given.


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## roswell (Feb 4, 2006)

Strange Religion said:


> Laicos said:
> 
> 
> > so i went for it and yea.. sex with an ex is a bad idea. well sorta... it was nice but she was wrong when she said it wouldnt bother her. she told me her feelings for me were coming back so we agreed to end it. so it was sort of a bad idea but nothing bad really happened. and well.. we did both get laid. but yea, i think its probably better to just end it and move on once ya break up with someone..
> ...


 :ditto

I'm not surprised though. After all, Seinfeld hasn't lied to me yet!


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## archaic (Jan 16, 2006)

Nevermind.


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

go for it!


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

:lol - He already did, and it was not a good idea!

Sex was made to be more than a physical act. There are emotions and a bond that cannot be made any other way.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

:lol - He already did, and it was not a good idea!

Sex was made to be more than a physical act. There are emotions and a bond that cannot be made any other way.


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## Laicos (Jun 24, 2005)

haha, its funny how many people read the first post and then reply... ha, i do it too but its funny to see those replies..

but sex is definitly more than just a physical act. i dont think it is impossible to have friends with benefits tho.. i think in this situation it was just that our feelings werent on the same level so someone was bound to get hurt.


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## odun (Nov 9, 2003)

bad idea.

maybe im an old fashioned prude. but ex means ex.


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## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

I wouldn't do it if you still really cared about her. Trust me, been there done that. It messed me up a little bit, because he didn't have the same feelings invested and he was dating someone new the week after. I would say no, we shouldn't and stop seeing each other altogether.


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## Razorblade Kiss (Oct 29, 2006)

Laicos said:


> haha, its funny how many people read the first post and then reply... ha, i do it too but its funny to see those replies..
> 
> but sex is definitly more than just a physical act. i dont think it is impossible to have friends with benefits tho.. i think in this situation it was just that our feelings werent on the same level so someone was bound to get hurt.


Right. It's certainly not impossible to have friends with benefits, it just has to be with someone you don't care about emotionally.
I've been there, but I want something more than that these days.


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## Mayflower 2000 (Nov 11, 2003)

millenniumman75 said:


> Sex was made to be more than a physical act. There are emotions and a bond that cannot be made any other way.


That explains one night stands.


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## tobeyourselfisnotacrime (Jun 10, 2007)

*Re:*



BeNice said:


> You're 18 and have had a sex life, and now you are pondering whether to have sex with your ex. Just be glad you don't wake up every morning dry humping your bed!


 :ditto


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## Nutnutnut (Jun 2, 2007)

Analyse the reasons that make you feel like having sex with him again. Do some introspection and find the core reason for this.


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## Laicos (Jun 24, 2005)

*Re: Re:*



BeNice said:


> You're 18 and have had a sex life, and now you are pondering whether to have sex with your ex. Just be glad you don't wake up every morning dry humping your bed!


oh, you have no idea my friend. my poor pillow, ha. believe me, your sexual desires do not decrease once you have sex. if anything they increase.



Nutnutnut said:


> Analyse the reasons that make you feel like having sex with him again. Do some introspection and find the core reason for this.


what? the core reason was because i was horny. i dont know what there is to analyze. i was just fulfilling a basic human urge we all have.


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

Sex: once you have it, you can't stop.


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## Strength (Aug 12, 2006)

I would find that hard. Especially if you used to be very emotionally close to that person...I don't know, I guess I just like to move forward. I'm not saying it would be impossible, just not necessarily that good for you especially if you're feeling lonely.


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## scairy (Sep 18, 2005)

I truly love you youngsters.


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## scairy (Sep 18, 2005)

srschirm said:


> Sex: once you have it, you can't stop.


Glad I haven't had it :rofl


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## FairleighCalm (May 20, 2007)

I agree with Betty. This is emotionally treacherous territory. Sex, fun. Realizing you're using someone you used to actually care about..........a bumpy head-***. You'll start to wonder all kind of crazy stuff. But i've done it so who am i to talk.


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