# Andy's goals



## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

I have 2 weeks off work for christmas. I'm already going out of my mind, need stuff to fill in the time, so here's some things I gotta do:

Get contact lenses - My glasses get in the way all the time. I'm so tired of them.
_Got 'em and wearing 'em. Done._

Get haircut. My hair is a mess.
_Done_

Get a hobby/craft.
_Took some photos yesterday. Photography is a hobby. _

Decide whether to move to g/f's city.
_Gonna wait and see what I think in a month+. Done_

Exercise more.
_Gonna go for bike rides + walks. Done_

Free myself from meds and their stupid side-effects.
_Done_

Longer term goals:

Move out of parents place
Explore career options
Probably heaps more but meh........


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## liliane21 (Dec 8, 2006)

Hey Andy! I was reading your goals and it looks like you accomplished them, and fast! Good job! How are your long-term goals going?Good luck on those. My hubby and I are trying to explore career options too but there's so many to choose from. What kinds of careers are you interested in? My goal now is to be able to have the motivation to first think of goals and accomplish them as fast as you did. Thanks for inspiring me!


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

My long term goals have gone nowhere - I looked at some ads for flats but couldn't gather the nerve to call about them. I've been thinking about studying some psych papers or something, but I'm not sure if thats something I really want to do. I got bored of photography as a hobby, so I'm looking for something else now. Plus my g/f dumped me, so my new goal is:

Find a new g/f.
_Joined 3 dating sites._


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Ok, forget finding a g/f for now. Still no progress on long-term goals. Instead I'm gonna focus on doing some new things. I'm gonna buy and learn to play a guitar and join some exercise programme or something. I think the smaller goals help to make it easier. So first I need to:

Buy Guitar - _Done_
Begin learning by myself - _Done_
Sign up for guitar class - _Done_
Go to first lesson - _Starts Monday_
Go to more lessons

Research exercise thingies that I could join - _Not gonna bother with this anymore_
Sign up for exercise group
Turn up for the first time
Keep going


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Now I have to move out of my parents place. Over the weekend I emailed about one flat. Tonight I have to call about some more flats, but I've been putting it off for days. If I don't post about my success soon, feel free to beat me.

Going to guitar practice on Monday, hope to make friends.

Should hear back from a therapist soon about an appointment for Saturday, gonna start CBT.

For now my long term goals are a bit better. I wanna start studying psychology either in the second semester of this year or starting next year. Till then I have to learn how to look after myself and live on my own, and make some more progress against SA.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Ok you don't get to beat me, I called about the flat. One was taken, and I'm going to have a look at the other one tomorrow.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Arg I'm moving out on Saturday! So nervous.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

So I've been in my flat a few days, loving it. At guitar lessons we went through introductions, and I managed to get through that ok. Had my appointment with new therapist, he was ok. Probably gonna skip this weekends appointment and visit someone from our new New Zealand support group. I got a short psychology book out of the library and been reading that.


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## SusanStorm (Oct 27, 2006)

Happy to see that things are going well for you,Andy.. :yes 

Good luck with everything..


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Hey Karin, thanks! Hope things are going well for you too.


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## oceanchief (Jan 6, 2007)

Yeah man, you did done good. Think you have a great strategy worked out. You feeling good about achieving your goals?


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Thanks chief. Sometimes it feels good, sometimes not - mostly not. Even though I'm doing these things I don't feel like I'm doing them very well. I guess I'll always be a work in progress, lots of things to work on still.


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## oceanchief (Jan 6, 2007)

That was why I actually asked. You see, when I was 17/18 I took my driving test 3 times and failed miserably each time. I gave up, and ever since it felt like this black cloud of failure followed me everywhere. So, last year I took up driving lessons, put in for my test and passed first time. I now own a car, and yet the black cloud which I attributed to not passing all those years ago still follows me around. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love the freedom my car now gives me. I guess I just felt it would be different, like i'd feel less worthless and more confident.

To conclude, I think goals give us something to focus on and attaining them may not mean all our issues are resolved, but they do help in the long term.

P.s. Your own pad = mucho freedom


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Sadly I have to find a new pad, my flatmate doesn't like my quiet ways . Have to call people about flats again, trying not to put it off, but its so hard. I hate the phone. Got 2 and a half weeks to move out. Made a list of places that I should call about but... avoidance.

Beginning to hate SA more than ever.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Also now my job is finished (last day tomorrow)... there's not enough work for them to keep me on, all the other temps but one have gone too.

Feeling better about things though. Feel a little freer. Realizing what I am capable of, and what is important. Getting a new job will be easy, temp agency might have something for me already. Finding a new flat shouldn't be as hard as I make it out to be. Want to get a place by myself, home should be a place that you can feel comfortable and safe in. I'm not up to living with flatmates yet I think.

Studying psychology seems so far beyond what I'm capable of right now, sometimes I'm not sure if I'll ever get there. Looking forward to the future though.

Made another appointment to see therapist on Saturday. All my hope now lies with CBT.


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## Gerard (Feb 3, 2004)

Good luck with CBT!


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Last night I was thinking about the things I do that perpetuate my anxiety and lonelyness. I don't do things where there are other people around. Firstly if I wanna meet new people I have to be around people. And secondly if I wanna make friends I have to have things to do with them. My inexperience in doing these kinds of things is all that really stops me from trying 'em out by myself. Once I've learned the ins and outs of these things and get more comfortable with 'em I'd be way more comfortable inviting someone to come along. So I'm making it my goal to go out and get a meal and do something at least once a week.

Last night I got takeaways and watched a movie by myself.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Temporarily taking a break from goals... feeling too depressed and lonely lately.


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## oceanchief (Jan 6, 2007)

Hey man, hang in there. I have alot of respect from reading your updates, as i'm sure many others do. You are a beacon of hope for the rest of us. You ever need to chat pm me. Take care man!


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## Gerard (Feb 3, 2004)

yeah, hang in there.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Ok, so new goals.

1. Make progress against SA. Probably the hardest and most important goal. Gotta start getting into this mindfullness thing and doing meditations, keep filling in my forms, do some exposure, and lots more.

2. Get a full or part-time job in admin.

3. Do some exercise/sport - my therapist thinks it would build confidence, he suggested running or swimming. So maybe run for 30 mins a day?

4. Find a new flat - this isn't so important, I think I need a job first. Living with my parents gives me more time to focus on other things anyway. Although independance is important to me.


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## Gerard (Feb 3, 2004)

Starting fresh. Cool and good luck!


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## Softy785 (Apr 16, 2006)

Great goals, keep up with the good work and do not give up or lose hope. Keep moving forward, step by step, and eventually you will get to the place you want to be in life. Good luck!


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Thanks for the support.

I should add that I also want to make a friend, but I'm not really sure how to go about that.


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## billy (Feb 15, 2006)

Keep updating Andy. It's a great read. You're definently trying. Alot of us can learn from you.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

So.... I got a job, now I just have to keep at it.

I'm going to university in July, and I've still gotta find a flat over there.

I don't have time for exercise, but work is probably enough.

Still haven't made any more friends. I _have_ to talk to people at work.


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## treksalot (Mar 9, 2007)

yea maybe you'll find something in common with your co-workers. Where I work people are nice and friendly. Saying hi I find helps and talking to them first (as in saying hi), especially if they don't know you. I know you didn't ask for any advice, I'm just saying what my experiences are this way...Being around people while at works helps me feel more comfortable with people and this took me awhile. It's funny I used to be scared of saying "hi" to others in fear that they might want to chat, when actually that's usually not the case at all. And knowing and saying who I am helps me out, when I need help/have a question, etc. and plus the workplace seems more friendly. And don't think I'm not afraid of introducing myself. I am and still am. I did it recently and it went well. i say keep it up and keep us posted.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Yeah I agree. My last job was really good because I worked _with_ people, doing the same thing and it was easier to talk. But what I'm doing now, no-one else does. So for me to talk to people I pretty much have to go out at breaks and introduce myself, which I don't think I can do. I tried today, there was a break-down and some people were sitting around and I walked up to someone but didn't really know what to say. Anyway at least I tried I guess.

 So glad I posted more goals. I'm back into it!


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## princessorwhat (Mar 30, 2007)

Hi Andy, just wanted to say that I find this thread really inspiring and it's amazing how many goals you have already reached.

Good luck and keep up the good work.

I might post a goals list on here soon too, I'm sure that's a great motivator!


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Found a flat. Quit my job. Moving next week hopefully. Going to university . Just 2 days left at work and I have to train someone to take my place. That'll be fun.

Gonna get into heaps of stuff. Meditation, exercise, eat properly, read more.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

TODAYS GOALS

1. Call about getting furniture taken to flat. *Done*
2. Buy running shoes *edit* and some new clothes *got some clothes leave shoes for tomorrow*.
3. Exercise for an hour. *Went for a long walk on the beach*
4. Meditate for 45 mins. *Done*

TOMORROWS GOALS

1. But the running shoes I was gonna buy yesterday. *Done*
2. Go see a movie. _Wasn't anything good on _
3. Exercise for an hour.*Walked and biked*
4. Meditate for 45 mins.*Done.*


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

_Newsflash........ Update.......... _
ba da da daaaa ba dah dah daaaaaaah (news music, lol)

I just got back on the net - had to get some network-o wirey thing to connect to flatty's server. Almost 2 days without the net and I was getting annoyed already... I must be addicted.

Anyway I've moved, been doing stuff. Flattys are ok, but not putting pressure on myself to be friendly or anything. Been out exploring the town, got grocery shopping done, etc. Things are going good - I'm surprised that I managed to do the things I've done so far. Now I just have to set up a routine so that I don't get too bored. Things to do, work out how often is appropriate to do stuff with my only friend so that she doesn't get pissed off with me. Looking for a job today.

Got this feeling like its all up to me - and I guess it is - to find friends and fill in all my time with things. Its kind of good and bad. What if I can't do it? Well that can't be worse then what I had before. About 5 weeks till university starts. Did I make the right decision to move early? Did I choose the right flat?


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Things for the next few days/week:

Join Gym, do some exercise - *Done, but I didn't ask anyone how to use stuff, just did 30 mins on the rowing machine since its the only exercise machine my tiny brain can comprehend*
Find counselor - *Gonna see someone on Thursday, 10:00am, in the registry building (just in case your stalking me, I see no reason to make your job any harder)*
Go see '28 Weeks Later' - * I went alone. Didn't really enjoy it, but it was an exercise in being nervous but doing it anyway I guess*
Go to Theosophical Society meeting/meditation/yoga thingys _emailed asking about em - their email back wasn't so helpful... Gonna go to a different meditation thingy tomorrow_
Buy some more clothes + gym/exercising clothes - *Got some, not sure if its enough*
Find other time-filling thingys to fill the void I find within myself
Get a part time job - *interview/start on friday, 1:00pm*


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## Gerard (Feb 3, 2004)

Yes! You are the goal man, Andrew! Good luck with your new set of goals! 

gerard

ps. I love this part of the forum! This forum rocks!


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Hehe thanks. The whole gym thing scares me though. Just all the exercise stuff that I don't know how to use, and lots of people around to see me do it all wrong. Never been to a gym before. *sigh* Guess I have to do it now...


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## SilentProphet (Jun 1, 2007)

Nice man, Carpe diem Andy!

Todays Goal -Quit smoking- FAILED 


Tommorows Goal- Quit smoking- Ah what the hell! i can't see into the future but- FAILED!


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Andy

28 weeks later - I thought it sucked too! Pirates of the Craibbean 3 was pretty good and I felt sorry for Davy Jones (that is his name right? Teantacle beard dude) when he died ... all tearful so I was.

Anyway just thought I'd post that in case you felt bad about not feeling good after 28 weeks later. It was naffer than a christmas cracker (a UK way of saying it was bad).

Ross


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Yeah Ross, it really did suck.

*Today*

I gotta head over to the gym again, this time to ask about getting a personal trainer to show me how to use the equipment - I'm supposed to get one free session with 'em. - * booked in for next Tuesday, 3:00*

Also going to this meditation group thing, which I'm nervous about 'cause I don't know what they do, and I might not be able to keep still if I'm trying to meditate around other people... and I haven't contacted them, just plan on turning up. - _I kinda failed... I was on campus, and decided I wouldn't go in. On my way back I changed my mind, and I went into the building that it was supposed to be at. I didn't know what room it was in and there was no-one around so I used that as an excuse to leave . As I was leaving a few people walked past me in the direction of the place I came from, maybe they were going to it. I must go next week. _

Another thing that I should add as a goal is I wanna do something with my friend today. I guess I'll just txt her and see if shes up to anything. - * Txted her, gonna have dinner with her tonight. *

*Tomorrow*

Going to see a counselor at 10:00am. Kinda worried about that 'cause I'll have to explain why I want to see them, and I don't really know myself. Kinda just cause I feel like I need someone to know about my situation so if anything does go wrong I'll have someone that I can go talk to. And talking scares me, with my psychs I didn't have to talk a lot, but with a counselor I'll have to explain everything. - *I'm so happy I did that. I must be making progress. I felt ok talking to a complete stranger about SA, and all of my problems. Didn't get all fidgety or anything.  woot.*


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Felt like sh*t last evening, even after doing some good things. I think I probably should have gone for a walk or something as soon as I felt like that. Still feel quite lonely.

Going to my new part-time job today. Gotta be there at 1:00pm. I guess it'd probably too much to hope to talk to my new co-workers and try to have a conversation. So I'll just hope to get through the day with my sanity intact. Thats pretty much my only goal for today.

_Blah I don't even start till next weekend now. Went to the interview, it went fine._


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Today I'm gonna get lunch at the park and go see a personal trainer at the gym to show me how to do stuff.


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## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

You should be so proud of all you have accomplished. Wow! :boogie


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Thanks SAgirl . So much more to do though.

In progress:
Weekend job.
Gym.

Things for next week:
Make appointment with counselor again.
Add more goals, lol.


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## billy (Feb 15, 2006)

Andy's back!


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Phew, I made the appointment with my counselor. I thought I was gonna go the whole week putting that off. Reminds me how useful this thread is to me.


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## gracie07 (Jun 21, 2007)

Hi Andy,

Thanks for posting your goals. You've accomplished and have done a lot in the past 6 months since first starting this thread.

Congrats and keep on posting! 

- Gracie


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Thanks Gracie. Yeah its been a long time - I've had 3 jobs, 2 flats, a psychologist and a counselor in that time. And now I've been going to the gym, and classes will start soon. I never would have believed I could make it so far at the beginning of this thread... I've got so many opportunities coming up... hopefully good times!


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

I have to do all these things I'm putting off doing:

1. Go to the town library and become a full member, check out what DVDs I can get there. - *Done. Got Shogun*
2. Go to the university library and have a look. - *Done*
3. Go to the bank and finish setting up my accounts properly. *Done, even got a credit card*
4. Get a haircut - hmmmmm maybe anyway.
5. Go see a doctor about hives that I seem to get from working hard - ex keeps insisting its acne, but its so not.
6. Buy text books for uni. - *Done*
7. Talk to girl at work that keeps looking at me - hardest goal ever!

_I think I'll have to spend all week psyching myself up for number 7 and then I'm not so sure if I'll go through with it._

Also, its not really a goal anymore - just something that I'm doing, its not hard - I'm seeing a counselor tomorrow.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Gotta finish off some of those ^^^^

Also gotta go to this place to sort out some stuff.

Plus since university is starting soon, some things I could do to move towards making friends:

Experiment with sitting at different places, with different people and with the same people.
Say hi.
Introduce myself.
Talk about the course.
Ask questions - I never ask questions...
In conversation too, I need to ask things, why are people doing this paper, what did they do before, etc.

OMG I'm nervous/excited/terrified.

I don't believe in you, but God, don't **** me over this time.

*DAYS TO GO TILL UNI STARTS: 1*


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## smiles (Nov 13, 2006)

good stuff man! you should talk to that girl...


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Yeah I'm just about to leave for work... not sure if I'll be able to do it :hide.


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## gracie07 (Jun 21, 2007)

andy1984 said:


> *DAYS TO GO TILL UNI STARTS: 1*


How was the first day at the university?!?!?

Did you talk to that girl?

Go Andy! Go Andy! :boogie


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

Still one day to go till university starts. And no . I had a bad day at work. Still got tomorrow to try if I have the opportunity.

I really need a haircut.


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