# Snarky Women



## kaspenpiedad (Feb 10, 2015)

So I started my first job a few weeks ago. I love my job. I don't have to talk to anyone that often; I just sit at a desk and do paperwork.

I've made some friends that sit with me at lunch and a friend that I smoke with once in a while. It's an overall enjoyable experience.

However, there is a group of women that like to insult me. There is a definite ringleader. She likes to call me ugly, make fun of my walk. Basically she likes to make fun of my appearance. I haven't done anything to her (not to my knowledge, anyway) nor talked to her. 

I've ignored her behavior so far. She hasn't threatened me in anyway, and it doesn't really bother me all that much since she's kept it up for weeks, which shows me that she has no life.

I think that if it does escalate, I'd go to human resources. For now, I'm just ignoring her.

I've also noticed that women are catty to me outside of work (as in school and shopping). Does anyone else have this problem or am I just weird?

Thanks for listening


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## Jade18 (Mar 6, 2011)

Shes just insecure thats why she puts you down to feel better..
what i find helps is to laugh at them..straight into their faces
not with them but more like in a way that u feel sorry fir her..
that she needs to put you down in order for her to feel better


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## thinkstoomuch101 (Jun 7, 2012)

No, don't "laugh" at anyone. It means that you've acknowledged her silliness - and you're joining in on the chorus.

You have two options. It takes balls for the first one, if you're up to it.

1) Approach the tormentor and ask her what's her beef with you?

2) Ignore her, and do what you've come there to do. "work". She should not be the one to come between you and your paycheck.

I work/live here in Mexico/New Mexico. Because Mexicans are the majority, i've been laughed at by them - especially in one gym i used to go to. I am not the only one that they tend to "get ornery" with, discriminate against or talk about. They do that to anyone whom they consider "foreign" or an "outsider" non-Mexican. Period.

I also learned, *just like any other culture,* they have their own insecurities. Thus, when they see others that make them feel insecure - they say or do things to make them feel better about themselves.


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## thinkstoomuch101 (Jun 7, 2012)

So, if you feel bad just going to work - and dealing with that? Just imagine what it's like to be in a different country - dealing with it - and not getting paid for it.:lol

_Toulouse Lautrec once said: " Laughter is the resort of fools."

Don't get down on her level. Especially if it's some ding-bat you don't even know.:blank

_She's just a bully.. and i'm sure you're not the first/last person she'll pick on.


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## Grog (Sep 13, 2013)

Just be happy , helpful , nice , you know all that stuff and she will eventually dig her own hole . And when it comes to her just be overly nice to her but never give her ammo or help her in any way , get your extra nice ***** on towards her .


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## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

What job is it? I need a job like that lol.


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## axisfawn (Mar 4, 2015)

ugh, I hate that kind of work environment.
I used to work in a library with an all-female, all-introvert staff. Great, I thought, until one would leave for the day (doesn't matter who) and everyone else would start in gossiping about them. As much as I wanted to love everyone, I knew they did the same every time I left first.
I do think it's a socially constructed competition/cattiness, but that doesn't make it any easier.
I never wanna work with all females again, unless it's in an exceptionally inclusive and supportive environment.


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## Hayman (Dec 27, 2014)

I've worked in an office for four and a half years which is largely full of women. It wasn't so bad for the first six months or so, but since then I've generally loathed most of them. They're also heavy on socalising. They all like hanging out with one another outside of work too. I've never understood this sort of close connection with work colleagues. You spend all day with them. Why spend all evening/weekend with them also? It's madness. :?

I won't give out of their real names but I will give the first letters:

'M' is two years younger than me. I used to think she used to secretly fancy me as she'd be generally polite and still is...when she feels like it. However most times she sees no issue with openly insulting me in a tongue-in-cheek kind of way. I brush it off in the office but she can say upsetting things which can stick in my mind for days, if not weeks at a time. She's very cute-looking though and I will admit that I have a bit of a secret crush on her despite all this. Mad, I know...

'C' is the oldest of the group and is quite easily the most pedantic person who I've ever worked with. Whatever you say or do is never right and she has to have the final word. Her favourite activity seems to be either correcting me or dissecting everything I say. My anxiety is certainly elevated in her presence as a result. She gets worse with each passing year also.

'L' is pretty much my age (barring a few weeks) and is probably one of the dumbest people I've come across in a long time. She's the sort of person who knows all her rights but knows no self-responsibility - or how to do her work correctly. She's described me openly as being "_just a boy_" and having had "_no life experience_". She has very selective hearing and has accused me of lying after passing on a message from a phone call. She's currently on maternity leave and guess who has had to pick up her workload. Yes. Me.

'D' has just returned from her second maternity leave. I don't actually mind her that much, but then again I only see her three days a week. She's generally an okay person but can snap at random and quick to chuck unfinished work onto others when it comes to leaving on Friday (she doesn't work on Monday and Tuesday)

'S' is very authoritative and isn't one to be argued with. She's been with the company the longest. She can dish out some questionable comments and reactions but really doesn't like the favour returned. She knows how to do near enough everything on the computer system, yet doesn't like being asked for help if you get stuck somewhere. She has a child and I'm lead to believe (purely told in confidence from someone who knows her well) that a second is now on the way, yet to be announced. Can you guess where her workload will end up when she disappears yet again for a whole year's maternity leave? Right again. Probably me.

'H' is the ringleader of most of the social activities. A typical, very loud extrovert who finds near enough everything absolutely hilarious. She spends most of her day surfing between all social media websites and doesn't seem to do all that much in the way of work on some days. She's quick enough to accuse others of slacking behind their backs, though.

Someone save me from all of this... _Please_...


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## Spungo (Jul 30, 2012)

Hayman said:


> 'H' is the ringleader of most of the social activities. A typical, very loud extrovert who finds near enough everything absolutely hilarious. She spends most of her day surfing between all social media websites and doesn't seem to do all that much in the way of work on some days. She's quick enough to accuse others of slacking behind their backs, though.


It sounds like you work with a bunch of losers. I think you should work closely with your boss and try to cut others out of the loop as often as possible. When it's time for layoffs, they'll get rid of the people who contribute nothing.


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## thinkstoomuch101 (Jun 7, 2012)

damn...Hayman..:blank

too much estrogen in that office for my comfort. 

May be the force be with you dude.. because you're going to need it.


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## Spungo (Jul 30, 2012)

thinkstoomuch101 said:


> too much estrogen in that office for my comfort.


I hate saying it, but this is the reason women get paid less than men. Everyone I know has experienced this.
http://www.theatlantic.com/business...e-women-want-to-work-with-other-women/283216/

Before my mom retired, her job turned into a BS power struggle against crazy women.


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## thinkstoomuch101 (Jun 7, 2012)

Spungo said:


> I hate saying it, but this is the reason women get paid less than men. Everyone I know has experienced this.
> http://www.theatlantic.com/business...e-women-want-to-work-with-other-women/283216/
> 
> Before my mom retired, her job turned into a BS power struggle against crazy women.


Wow! that's a really good article, and some of the comments were very honest women.

(and of course, the ones that were against the author called that person a "misogynist"...) really?


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## HannahG (Aug 31, 2010)

If you have a decent Human Resources department. File a complaint now. Then if it escalates you can go back and file another one. Chances are they're doing this to someone else too.

Also, in Canada here, they did pass a Bill last year about this. It is harassment. HR has to take it seriously (my crappy job sort of does this too, if you can prove it the company ends up paying people off. I've seen it happen). 
BUT what should happen according to our laws is that in any case of harassment, the perpetrator needs to be removed from the situation and the 'victim' should never be the one punished or relocated. And depending on the situation, legal action could be taken.


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## needformeaning (Mar 9, 2015)

I'm not unpleasant or cocky, but I've felt rudeness o cattiness from women for no reason at all.
I am quite shy, and I've heard women sense others' weaknesses and take advantage of that.
Fake confidence or something.
So sorry. I don't know why some women take it as a life mission to make other women miserable. It's really sad.


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## gopherinferno (Apr 7, 2009)

Do that human resources thing, or find comfort in the fact that this woman is dead inside and hates herself more than she will ever hate anyone else. Or both.


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## Aribeth (Jan 14, 2012)

Man that sucks. I'd never work in an all-female environment. Being surrounded by women is the worst thing ever :/


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## LouiseLane (Mar 15, 2015)

Spungo said:


> I hate saying it, but this is the reason women get paid less than men.


That was an interesting article but what you say here is not correct, at all. Pay discrepancy is much more complex.


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