# Too afraid to apply for a job?



## LewisS

Hello!

I recently finished college and I really want to start working. The problem is that I can't bring myself to even begin an application for a job because the thought of getting a response scares me to death...:afr

It's just I know that I would embarrass myself by shaking and not knowing what to say in an interview. It really annoys me because I want to work and if I could go into a job without the applicant stages I'd probably be fine.

I understand that exposure to such situations would help, but if I made a fool of myself, I'd probably have even more anxiety if I had to do it again. I worry myself because a part of me sometimes considers having a few drinks before an interview (which I have done in other similar situations) and the last thing I want is to resort to alcoholism just to get through my SA...

Any tips/advice would be much appreciated!

Thanks


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## Steinerz

Whats the worst they could say? 


No.


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## LewisS

That's true, but having social anxiety (which I assume you do too) it's not as easy as just convincing myself it's that simple. If it was, my anxiety wouldn't be a problem and I wouldn't have joined this forum.

Somebody without SA could easily just think 'What's the worst that could happen?' but for me the worst is guaranteed in my mind. The worst being I'll break down in the interview, make a fool of myself and never want to apply for a job again.

I came here for support, but in the two or three threads I've made up to now, I've just received pretty blunt answers from people that don't seem to understand - like my friends without SA would respond. I hoped to find like-minded people that had the same issues as myself.

So nobody knows of any coping mechanisms or tips for keeping calm in such situations?


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## coldsorehighlighter

Is there anyone you can practice interviews with? You could even videotape them and watch yourself after to see how you actually look. You can practice breathing, remaining calm, and taking time to answer the questions. You're probably so worried about appearing anxious that your brain isn't allowed to focus on the questions you're going to be asked.

Practice, practice, practice...


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## LewisS

Thanks for the reply 

I definitely need to practice being under those conditions. I think it's the unpredictability that worries me the most. The fact that they could ask anything and I may not know how to answer it.

What if they asked me to tell them about myself? Because of my SA I avoid a lot of social activities (unless it involves alcohol which is liquid confidence for me, not the best thing to tell and interviewer about). I guess I could tell them that I have been at college for the past 4 years studying IT, I like travelling and socialising with friends. That's all I have...

Maybe I just need exposure to one interview and I'd have an idea of how to prepare myself. I find it difficult to even click the apply button on job search sites, it's that bad.


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## firestar

When it comes to things like this, I usually try to remind myself I always have an out. So, for example, when it comes to filling out applications online, you might say, "I can always shut down the browser window if it gets too much" or "I'm just going to fill it out but I won't actually submit it." The point isn't to take the out, but it helps reduce the anxiety to know that it's there. 

As for the interview section, the only thing that works for me with presentations is a lot of rehearsal, so that I can recite the answers under pressure. Although I understand that doesn't really help when you don't know the exact questions they're going to ask.


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## Perkins

For interviews, my advice is to practice and rehearse your answers for as many questions as you can because you have no idea what style of interview it will be or how long it will be. You'll have no idea what will be asked, so I find the best way to help ease my anxiety is to practice for as many interview questions as possible. Once I know I prepared the best I could, I can rest a little bit easier and at least some of the anxiety melts away. Also, I would very much recommend practicing in front of a mirror so you can monitor your facial expressions as you recite your answers. It's very important to project a friendly, amiable manner to the interviewer no matter how crappy you may be feeling inside. Act, act, act.

As for the application thing, I myself can relate. When I was younger the thought of walking into a store and asking for an application terrified me. The thought alone of _turning in_ one in person and having the person look at it in front of me was more than enough to keep me isolated. But now I'm getting used to it. That doesn't mean I like it, though. I hate it. But I know I _have _to put myself out there. I _have _to put myself out there and get out of my comfort zone or else I'll still be unemployed, and I can't be. I have to do something. As much as I dislike doing this, I know it's something that must be done or else the likelihood of my getting work remains unlikely.


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