# Women putting men on pedestals



## humourless (Sep 27, 2011)

To balance the other thread.:nw:nw:nw

It looks like a lot of women don't like being put on pedestals.

How about guys? Do you like women putting you on a pedestal?

Personally...well...um...there are ...worse things that could ..um ...happen to you...

But in the long run I guess..it is hard work to hide all one's hideous flaws.


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## introverted loner (Dec 28, 2011)

Women don't like nice guys. They like "bad dudes" who make the woman chase after them.


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## Knowbody (Jul 5, 2011)

women like vampires


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## humourless (Sep 27, 2011)

introverted loner said:


> Women don't like nice guys. They like "bad dudes" who make the woman chase after them.


Yeah ..I thought that was mainly the youngish ones who put "bad dudes" on pedestals....


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## introverted loner (Dec 28, 2011)

Women consider "nice guys" boring.


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## introverted loner (Dec 28, 2011)

humourless said:


> Yeah ..I thought that was mainly the youngish ones who put "bad dudes" on pedestals....


More so than the older ones probably. Then when they want to settle down they might not mind being with a gentleman. lol


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## humourless (Sep 27, 2011)

introverted loner said:


> More so than the older ones probably. Then when they want to settle down they might not mind being with a gentleman. *lol*


Why lol?


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## introverted loner (Dec 28, 2011)

humourless said:


> Why lol?


Just funny how that works. Quiet guys get the leftovers.

But to answer your question, I don't want to be put on a pedestal as much as I want respect. To find a nice genuine girlfriend who is an all around decent person.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

"women weaken legs!!"


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## Ventura (May 5, 2009)

leonardess said:


> "women weaken legs!!"


& carries the pretty lady :mushy


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

that movie had THE best movie kiss ever, bar none - bar NONE!


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

introverted loner said:


> Quiet guys get the leftovers.


You seem like a nice guy.


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## BobtheBest (Aug 27, 2011)

introverted loner said:


> Women don't like nice guys. They like "bad dudes" who make the woman chase after them.


Hmm, how cliche...


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## jsgt (Jun 26, 2011)

It's never happened, but if it did...I'd feel very uncomfortable and would think twice about this person. I like my independance, so the clingy type would not work out for me.


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## MsDaisy (Dec 27, 2011)

The men Ive known, their pedestal is referred to a sofa. They plant themselves there with remote in hand, and expect the world to revolve around them. That doesn't go over with me. Ive got myself on my own pedestal now...and the remote is mine...he ha ha...all mine!!


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## anotherusername (Nov 5, 2011)

^ This.


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## offbyone (May 5, 2010)

BobtheSaint said:


> Hmm, how cliche...


And inaccurate too! I'm amazed on how hung up on stereotypes and poor assumptions so many people are.


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## humourless (Sep 27, 2011)

MsDaisy said:


> The men Ive known, there pedestal is referred to a sofa. They plant themselves there with remote in hand, and expect the world to revolve around them. That doesn't go over with me. Ive got myself on my own pedestal now...and the remote is mine...he ha ha...all mine!!


That reminds me. One good thing about being addicted to the Net. I don't spend as much time in front of the TV....with a can of beer and remote!!:drunk


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## humourless (Sep 27, 2011)

My brief taste of pedestalism was my last year of high school. I excelled in rugby and experienced a brief feeling of "rock stardom". I never experienced it again in my life but I can see how addictive that feeling can be and how obnoxious you can become as you start to believe the hype!:blank


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## Insane1 (Jul 25, 2011)

Women always talk about how much they want nice guys that would treat them right but they also put them in the friend zone and run after jerks who treat them like crap and dump them after they get laid. Then women start bragging about how all men are pigs and stuff like that. Nobody gives a crap about the agressive prehistorical men that were able to provide and protect. Get your mind right girls..


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)




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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

There were some girls in the past I've met online with low self-esteem who were obsessed with me. I think it's flattering when a girl says that I'm cute/attractive/whatever and flirts with me and I'm not shy to flirt with her back. But not when she starts getting all emotional with me when I have barely done anything to warrant that yet. Or getting upset when I don't answer her frequently enough on MSN/AIM.


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## au Lait (Sep 8, 2010)

lol how did this turn into a Nice Guy thread?

I swear, you could make a thread about deep sea fishing and SAS could turn it into a Nice Guys vs women-athon.


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## _AJ_ (Jan 23, 2008)

I love it when she puts me on a pedestal, and she loves it when i put her on one too


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## XxArmyofOnexX (Aug 13, 2007)

au Lait said:


> lol how did this turn into a Nice Guy thread?
> 
> I swear, you could make a thread about deep sea fishing and SAS could turn it into a Nice Guys vs women-athon.


You love these threads don't you?


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## identitycrisis (Sep 18, 2011)

thekloWN said:


>


I have no idea what this is, or what it means, but it sums up this thread pretty well.


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## Rixy (Oct 4, 2009)

A girl told me she loved me as a way of expressing her interest in me. This was just...out of nowhere. 

Thank God for the emotionless medium that is social media. It would have been much more awkward in real life.


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## XxArmyofOnexX (Aug 13, 2007)

Rixy said:


> A girl told me she loved me as a way of expressing her interest in me. This was just...out of nowhere.


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## jayjaythejetplane (May 13, 2011)

BobtheSaint said:


> Hmm, how cliche...


I think the "women like badboys" is very true, but only to a certain point. Showering a woman with gifts and constantly giving her compliments are the actions of a nice guy right? Women for the most part will find this tedious, creepy and boring. Why? In my opinion it's because the equilibrium of value gets distorted. The nice guy routine lowers a mans value because by giving women your undivided goodwill so to speak, not only are you raising her value up in her mind, but she also won't find you challenging. Now this doesn't mean be a complete caveman, but you need to find the right balance.


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## BobtheBest (Aug 27, 2011)

jayjaythejetplane said:


> I think the "women like badboys" is very true, but only to a certain point. Showering a woman with gifts and constantly giving her compliments are the actions of a nice guy right? Women for the most part will find this tedious, creepy and boring. Why? In my opinion it's because the equilibrium of value gets distorted. The nice guy routine lowers a mans value because by giving women your undivided goodwill so to speak, not only are you raising her value up in her mind, but she also won't find you challenging. Now this doesn't mean be a complete caveman, but you need to find the right balance.


It's ok to be nice, as long as you're not overdoing it. It's a matter of having self-respect.


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## introverted loner (Dec 28, 2011)

qweewq said:


> You seem like a nice guy.


I'm not a mean guy. I reciprocate the same respect I'm given.


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## introverted loner (Dec 28, 2011)

BobtheSaint said:


> Hmm, how cliche...


yet so true...


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## BobtheBest (Aug 27, 2011)

introverted loner said:


> yet so true...


Not really. Some like bad boys, some don't. Different people like different things, I guess.


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## introverted loner (Dec 28, 2011)

Would you agree the outgoing social guy has a better chance getting a girlfriend than the guy who sits back and observes?


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## MindOverMood (Dec 12, 2009)

identitycrisis said:


> I have no idea what this is, or what it means, but it sums up this thread pretty well.


Charles Manson.


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## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

humourless said:


> How about guys? Do you like women putting you on a pedestal?


Never had this problem. :blank


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## TheCynicalEye (Sep 7, 2011)

BobtheSaint said:


> It's ok to be nice, as long as you're not overdoing it. It's a matter of having self-respect.


Who determines that someone is "overdoing it"?

If one girl decides that I'm overdoing it, but another decides that I'm doing it just enough, do I simultaneously have self-respect and yet no self-respect?


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## TheCynicalEye (Sep 7, 2011)

joinmartin said:


> No, that'd be calibrating to the person you're with and the context of the interaction. Fairly astute social skill.


I don't know about anyone else, but I personally would rather not be a chameleon.


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## TheCynicalEye (Sep 7, 2011)

joinmartin said:


> And you would not be a chameleon if you were calibrating to who you were with.
> 
> You're not the same person with everyone in your life. None of us are. I'm not talking to my Mum how I'd talk to my friends. We all calibrate to who we are with and it's one of the foundations of communication.


I agree completely.



> If I meet someone who is deaf then I calibrate by using what sign language I know. If I meet a French person, I do my best to speak a bit of French if needs be. I stay true to my core self but my core self needs to calibrate to other people's core selves in order to communicate with them.


This is certainly true, but these are pretty superficial and minor calibrations. Using some sign language and speaking a few words of French don't require you to set your emotions or beliefs aside (as you said, staying true to your "core self" while making a few modifications). Calibrating in relationships, on the other hand, can sometimes be another matter altogether.

If I'm with a girl and she thinks I'm "overdoing it" -- even when I think I'm just being me -- then I suppose I'd have to calibrate to such an extent that the relationship would no longer be satisfying to me. Most people are willing to make minor calibrations; major calibrations, on the other hand, depending on their nature and number, tend to strain and destroy relationships.

But I'm not really sure what the "calibration" concept has to do with my original point, to be honest.


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## BobtheBest (Aug 27, 2011)

introverted loner said:


> Would you agree the outgoing social guy has a better chance getting a girlfriend than the guy who sits back and observes?


This makes a lot of sense. :yes


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## TheCynicalEye (Sep 7, 2011)

joinmartin said:


> *Calibration has everything to do with your original point because each girl is going to be different* and you need to notice how she is responding to what you're doing in order to have a good communication with her. If you're not noticing her responses to you then you might as well be talking to yourself or the wall. She will give you signs if you're overdoing it whether they be subconscious or conscious signals. It will be different dependant on the girl and the context and the situation but she will respond to whatever you're doing and you then decide what you're going to do about that.


This is all true. But you haven't mentioned the self-respect issue, which was what my original point was all about. So I'm not sure how any of this specifically relates to that.


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## TheCynicalEye (Sep 7, 2011)

joinmartin said:


> You maintain your self respect but you need to calibrate to the girl you are actually with at the time and the context you happen to be in.


Unfortunately, this doesn't address the question I'm asking here.


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## andrew1234 (Jan 12, 2012)

interesting


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## StayingMotivated (Sep 5, 2011)

I would never LOL that's funny.


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