# Psychologist can't help me



## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

I saw a psych today and she was useless. She just asked me a bunch of generic questions then said she couldn't help me cause she felt like she was just interrogating me and I wasn't saying much. Do you really think I'm gonna trust you enough to just empty my heart the first meeting??? :mum 

She said nobody can help me except this one guy, but I heard of the one guy before and I'm not sure about him.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Whats your diagnosis? Do you not come under her areas of speciality?


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## nothing to fear (Mar 23, 2005)

:roll did she know you have social anxiety? if she does then it should be expected that you'll be quiet at first. even normal people find it hard opening up to a complete strange right away.


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

Over the phone I said I have social anxiety so I don't know why this was surprising to her...she is supposedly good with anxiety, but obviously not.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Social Anxiety (or social phobia) is unique among the anxieties and needs a diffeernent approach. In fact she would have been professionally dis-honest if she had taken you on and doesnt have experience in it.

Whats wrong with the other guy?


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

The other guy is a social anxiety specialist, but he looks creepy to me and he has Google Ads on his website which I think is unprofessional.

I thought about it and I will try some other psychs, but I want to find a woman under 40, otherwise I don't think it's going to be successful. I felt immediately that this woman I saw today who was in her late 50s would not be able to help so I didn't open up. I actually wouldn't have a problem being very talkative in the first meeting if I were more optimistic about the doctor. I just need a psych who I feel comfortable talking about and then hopefully they can dig deeper as we progress.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

You need to work at feeling comfy dude- may take a few sessions. If you feel you want a female thats good - its good to know! Hope it goes well though, therapists rock


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

How old is your psych? Male or female?


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Its a dude - i dont get on with females! I needed a father figure you see :lol Current one is about 35 and is by his own presence healing my "dudes who are a similar age to me" prob. The first one was about 50. He rocked! Both CBT guys but with real worldy wiseness. My current one uses compassion and some other emo techniques on top of the CBT.

Ive had two female therapists who were of the psychoanalysis model. They punched my 'critical mother figure' button WAY too hard .... no sir!!


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

so what is the difference with CBT? Is it more practical and having you do homework and stuff?

I'm familiar with CBT, just wondering how it changes the psych session compared to psychodynamic


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## tomcoldaba (Jul 1, 2007)

daaaaave said:


> The other guy is a social anxiety specialist, but he looks creepy to me and he has Google Ads on his website which I think is unprofessional.
> 
> .


Is this the guy in Washington DC? Cohen or whatever? He has appeared on NPR.


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

Yes, it's Cohen


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

I'm going to another therapist Wednesday...hope this one is better.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Psychodynamic is the whysa and wherefores and getting to the emotions. CBT is what to do once you've got that info. Generally CBT can get 'deep enough' by acessing beliefs about the self - which are still very deep, but it doesnt go to the same abyssal lengths as psychodynamic.

For people with personality disorders and lifelong chronic depression, then some emotional / PD element is considered necessary to find and remove the blocks. This would be the case with very early life trauma and deep scars formed way back as a little 'un. 

Basically PD is having a chat with your mum and she says "ah you feel like this because of X". CBT is then the chat with your dad where he says "and this is now what you need to do about it". Its aint quite that simple as THOUGHTS and BELIEFS drive your emotions and so your actions. PD is good for getting the really buried stuff that you might be suppressing from yourself and a therapist. To overcome SA properly though, IMO you NEED a very healthy CBT element - it is primarily a behvioural disorder. I have huge insight now from the PD element of schema therapy, but without the practical tools of handling every day life and the associated thoughts with CBT, insight alone would be useless.

Thats why Schema combines both.

Ross


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

I have my first therapy appointment with a new psych tomorrow. I don't know what to say. My last therapist didn't want to see me cause I didn't explain my problems enough so she couldn't help. What do you say on the first appointment? I think a lot of these psychs just want to deal with temporary issues like relationships, grief, etc. and nobody knows how to get after deeper lifelong problems.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Your last psych sucked. Dont overganeralise the opinion to em all  If this one sucks too, then start looking in different places for your pyschs. I can give you a list!

Oh and I know this is a crap thing to write - but I'll put it anyway - stop being so PESSIMISTIC!! :lol hehe dont hit me ...

Ross


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

the new therapist was a bit better and i will go back next week, but i still would prefer a therapist closer to my age.


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