# What do you say after "How are you doing?"



## VivaEmptinessRoses (Mar 31, 2010)

In most conversations, people usually say "Hi, how are you doing?" and I reply "good." 

What gets me is that I am not sure what is supposed to be said after this. The person usually looks at me to respond, but I dont know what to say back.

I just dont get why they ask me how I am doing, but dont lead the conversation. This makes me nervous because I dont understand what they want me to say or do.


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## Ventura (May 5, 2009)

Me too..... 

Ummm "what have you been up to lately" idk :l Then bring up something they past told you.... I'm awful with convo's


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## Moment of Clarity (Nov 3, 2011)

VivaEmptinessRoses said:


> What gets me is that I am not sure what is supposed to be said after this. The person usually looks at me to respond, but I dont know what to say back.


Why not ask them how they're doing?


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## GaaraAgain (Oct 10, 2011)

VivaEmptinessRoses said:


> In most conversations, people usually say "Hi, how are you doing?" and I reply "good."
> 
> What gets me is that I am not sure what is supposed to be said after this. The person usually looks at me to respond, but I dont know what to say back.
> 
> I just dont get why they ask me how I am doing, but dont lead the conversation. This makes me nervous because I dont understand what they want me to say or do.


Conversation's a two way street, so I usually bounce the same question back, so it looks like:

Them: Hey, how are you?
Me: Not too bad, can't complain, really. _How about you?_
Them: Yeah, the same pretty much.
Me: Okay, that's cool. *(insert another question here if you want to continue talking)* If not, say something like, "Glad to hear it. I'm going to head (home, to class, wherever) so you stay well. Nice seeing you."

^Not word for word, obviously, but something like that. Doesn't work for every situation, either.


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## Salus (Feb 27, 2011)

im good thanks..you


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## Meta14 (Jan 22, 2012)

"What class do you have right now?" I have an easy time making a convo out of that. 

"Oh, is it fun/interesting?"
"I remember taking that."

Though it only works at school.


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## Badmonkey (Dec 11, 2010)

VivaEmptinessRoses said:


> In most conversations, people usually say "Hi, how are you doing?" and I reply "good."
> 
> What gets me is that I am not sure what is supposed to be said after this. The person usually looks at me to respond, but I dont know what to say back.
> 
> I just dont get why they ask me how I am doing, but dont lead the conversation. This makes me nervous because I dont understand what they want me to say or do.


The reason lies within your reply, saying "good" is just not enough.

If (that's a big if) you're looking to have a small talk with that person then the formula should something like this:

"Hi, how are you doing?"
- "I'm good, how are you?"

This way you're giving them a chance to answer and continue the conversation.


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## Phelps89 (Feb 29, 2012)

I normally respond "good, how are you?" They say "good, thanks." And than the conversation is usually over.


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## BarryLyndon (Jun 29, 2010)

Ahh yes the intricacies of conversation. My only suggestions are talk about the weather, current events, and maybe sports. Avoid politics and religion, which is perhaps a given. Umm anything else just play it by ear.


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## copper (Nov 10, 2003)

I hate when the Nurse at the doctors office ask me this. What do you think? I am at the doctors office. It isn't my top choice to spend my time.


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## CoastalSprite (Sep 8, 2011)

"Fine, thanks for asking. So what can I get you?"

I work in a coffee shop and my customers usually ask me this. It's sweet of them but kind of pointless; what am I supposed to say, I'm tired and wishing I were instead sitting at the lounge across the street?


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## Jennifer Clayton (Nov 19, 2010)

UGH. I hate this question. I get it soooo much at work from co-workers and customers. Like all I can think of is 'good' 'pretty good' or 'great', and then I ask them how they are doing, and they say the same thing. It's sooo boring. I wish I or someone could think of something a little more interesting than good, because for 1, I know it's not always true, and 2, because everyone says it, it sounds so fake and meaningless, like why do we even say it.

I get a bit frustrated every time I hear it. Oh, but every once in awhile, someone will reply with 'tired'.


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## Faith7 (Jun 27, 2011)

The weather is always a good one, works for me like a dream


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## alien88 (Nov 1, 2011)

don't respond with just "good" you have to go on and try to actually talk about what's going on........like ur busy with school, exams...whatever your doing.


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

copper:1059752476 said:


> I hate when the Nurse at the doctors office ask me this. What do you think? I am at the doctors office. It isn't my top choice to spend my time.


So instead of hating that situation, you could be funny and say just what you're thinking in a joking way: "Well...I'm here so..bla bla bla." The only reason you don't like that kind of situation is because you're not taking the easy opportunity to be charming.


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## Squirrelevant (Jul 27, 2008)

I think the two responses below are the only ones I've given to this question (in real life).

I'm alright thanks. How are you?
Tired, been busy with X. How are you?


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## Deathsmelody (Mar 16, 2012)

I just say "fine, you?"


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## wootmehver (Oct 18, 2007)

I usually reply to them that I am not doing very well at all since I am a hopeless social retard with a bleak future and if they don't have a magic cure for SA I don't want to talk to them further.


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## VivaEmptinessRoses (Mar 31, 2010)

Badmonkey:1059752366 said:


> VivaEmptinessRoses said:
> 
> 
> > In most conversations, people usually say "Hi, how are you doing?" and I reply "good."
> ...


but when i say "Im good, how r u?" the person doesn't answer back. does that mean the conversation is over?


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

I normally just reply with ;fine' or 'alright' and then bounce the question back at them. I'm terrible with continuing convos though so most of the time it ends a little while later after that xD


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## VivaEmptinessRoses (Mar 31, 2010)

Phelps89:1059752439 said:


> I normally respond "good, how are you?" They say "good, thanks." And than the conversation is usually over.


yeah, this is what happens to me all the time. i can't break the i ice.


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## radiancia (Apr 6, 2011)

I know what you mean...I always hate this question and always sound awkward answering it. I can never answer it with enthusiasm, in fact I think I usually sound sarcastic because I know its just pointless. Usually I say 'umm yeah okay' and quickly think of something more fun to ask them about. Its so stupid when you get stuck in 'how are you' 'good how are you' 'yeah not too bad' 'oh thats good' 'so what have you been up to' 'not much you?' 'yeah pretty boring' 'ummmm cool'. People suck at conversation if I dont take the initiative and ask them specific things about their job or something.


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## Squirrelevant (Jul 27, 2008)

VivaEmptinessRoses said:


> but when i say "Im good, how r u?" the person doesn't answer back. does that mean the conversation is over?


Perhaps you didn't say it clearly enough? That happens to me sometimes. I can't think of any other reason that someone wouldn't answer.


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## Husker9019 (Aug 14, 2011)

I'd rather make statements than ask questions. It doesn't come off like you're grilling them and it's easier for them to respond in kind.


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