# Getting back to work after an awful experience



## Delila (Dec 29, 2012)

This may be long, and I apologize for that. But I'm at a point that I have no idea what to do and I don't really know how to explain things without detail.

I lost my job in February. I had initially gotten the job through a place that helps people with disabilities get work due to social anxiety and some other issues. After the initial program ended, I was hired immediately. My boss was amazing and understood my issues and never pushed me. I loved what I did; even though it was very people oriented, and people could get aggressive, I knew I was safe. If I did something wrong I wouldn't be yelled at. It was good. I worked as a secretary with a lot of side jobs in graphic design and things.

Things started going wrong in June or July. The executive director/boss was accused of stealing large amounts of money. I was one of the people that first discovered the money was missing. He got fired and a new executive director was brought in temporarily.

This is where things got really fishy. There was no investigation into the missing money (over 50k). The temporary executive director was brought in permanently in an illegal fashion (not following what was outlined in the nonprofit guidelines). A supervisor position was created in the office and given to someone who had been there less than six months, making her rank above me.

The last few months, money was still going missing. I was told not to ask about it; it would show up. I had the accountant tell me 'don't worry, it'll show up'.

I was the only person in the office that would speak up to the new boss. I would tell her if something was done wrong or unfair. I made an effort to protect the yard staff who were being mistreated at that point. They tried firing one staff member for something said outside of work on a personal cell phone. At that point I told the boss if she fired him, I would quit. She didn't fire him and asked me to stay.

Things started going bad in December. My supervisor took two vacations within the same month. She just changed the sign in system before leaving for the second vacation, leaving me no information about what she changed. I had a lot of people asking questions and basically had to guess how to do it. There were a lot of safety problems with this new system and I sent her an email asking what to do about them.

She didn't reply. I forwarded the email to the boss, who told me she agreed with me, go back to the old system for now.

The supervisor came back from her vacation and wouldn't say a word to me. The sign in system was switched back to the new one with no changes, even though the safety officer on site agreed with all my concerns, and continued to bring them up until the day I left. I spent the next two months tryign to work with a woman who refused to agknowledge my presence.

This is when my ability to do my job was taken into question. The supervisor was taking credit for work I did. I had a coworker witness this himself, and though he corrected her, I doubt anyone believed him. She basically made it out like I was doing nothing, when I was doing my fair share. She was also constantly bringing her daughter in to work and giving her work that I should be doing, making it look like I was doing nothing.

I knew what she was doing; she was setting her daughter up to take over my job and setting me up to get fired. I informed my boss of my concerns and she said she would have a talk with her, things would change.

I was getting singled out by everyone in that office. I missed one day due to issues with my medication (I didn't realize that's what it was at the time. Basically, the pharmacy gave me a different brand without informing me and I had a small breakdown. I didn't go home for several days and called in to work one day, though it was a few hours late. I didn't realize until I broke down to my mother in tears just how bad I was) and was berrated for it. I was cornered in a locker room by a male supervisor and was forced to tell him about my mental health. He responded with a degrading comment, comparing me to another coworker with mental health issues.

If I was five minutes late, I'd get a call. They called my mother on more than once occasion to find out where I was, or to get me to come in to work (I'm 23yrs old, but they all know my mother from when I first started working there and was very dependent her). If someone was going out for lunch or coffee, they brought something back for everyone in the office except me. It was obvious and stupid, but hurtful.

I sent my boss a detailed email with all of the bullying and childish behaviors that were going on, begging her to do something about it, or I would be forced to go over her head to worksafe. I had coworkers telling me to just go over her head - she isn't going to do anything. I had one coworker spending more time in the office than he should and getting into trouble for it because he didn't agree with the way I was being treated and wanted to be there to defend me. He quit after I was laid off, which happened the day after I sent this email.

The job was seriously effecting my mental health, but I loved my job. I loved what I did, even if no one believed I was doing it. Then in February, I was laid off. By 'laid off' I mean I was told not to come back for my three weeks, given two weeks pay compensation, and replaced the next day by my supervisors daughter.

I was hurt. I had worked there for three years. I put everything I had into that job and it was all taken away. I gave them services for free that would have cost hundreds if not thousands of dollars.

I wanted to go after them legally for the money they owe me - including a week of pay and stat pay I never received. But after getting laid off I've barely left my bedroom. It doesn't help that I was basically abandoned by people I thought were friends. I was just a coworker.

All of this along with an incident that happened when I first started working there (a coworker - the same man that cornered me in the locker room - felt me up when I was sitting at my desk. I didn't talk about it or bring it up until all of this happened. I wanted to believe he was a good person) has destroyed all progress I had made. I was answering phones, dealing with irate customers, leaving the house on my own regularly, busing places and being independant. I was thinking about moving out. Now I'm laying in bed at 2am writing this post. I've hardly left the house, I don't bother with showering or makeup or cleaning my room.

I had started feeling better and started looking for a job but every time I try to even make my resume I panic. I'm terrified that this is going to happen again. I'm terrified of having my mental illness outed in a work environment again. I'm very careful about how I tell, especially after the locker room incident. I also saw the way supervisors treated other mentally ill coworkers - asking them if they had taken their meds if they were having an off day and encouraging others to do the same, making fun of them. I know I became one of the people they make fun of the moment that supervisor found out about my meds.

My EI is running out. I need a job. My mother can't support me and I don't want to go on welfare again. I just have no idea how to approach this. I've thought about therapy, but it's never really worked in the past. I've kept my doctor up to date on what was happening at work, but I haven't really been truthful about my mental state. I just don't like people worrying about me and I'm just really ashamed that I've let myself get this bad again. I was doing so good and I failed at everything.

I just want to be able to get a job. I want to be able to leave my house again.


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## TheSeeker (Jun 12, 2013)

Im sorry that you had to go through so much bs. My first thought is how corrupt the place was to begin with. All of the bullying that took place should be reported to the EOEC. This type of thing will keep going on if someone doesn't stop it. Though I don't know if you would have wanted to go through the trouble, you could have filed a sexual harassment lawsuit against the guy who felt you up, if you thought it was severe enough.

Instead of thinking about everything that went wrong, try to focus on everything positive. Like you said, though the job turned out to be s**t in the end, you were gaining independence, getting out of the house everyday, meeting people ect. Also your mood has inproved since you're starting to look for a new job. You can't let what happened scare you into thinking it will happen again. Most places aren't as corrupt/screwy as where you were, so think about where you could be working instead of where you did work.


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## keithp (Mar 13, 2007)

What about the program that trained you, can't you go back to them? Couldn't what happened at work be discrimination to a disabled person isn't a lawsuit against the company possible it's messed up what they did!


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