# alone at lunch



## lovevly (Sep 7, 2014)

so i started highschool almost a month ago, i knew before coming in i would have no friends, but i didnt know it would be this bad. I think the thing that makes it worse is that i do have acquaintances, and they question why im alone. I get so embarrassed because they tell me to go make friends, and pitty me. Its been almost a month and im starting to lose hope that i will soon make friends. I feel so alone, that even at home im sad and feel like im alone. Its so hard to make friends because people come in with their group of friends from middle school and keep it like that, almost as if they dont want anyone new in their group. To make it worse theres a guy that i like, and even though i think he likes me as well,i know he thinks im a total loser he asked why i sit alone and i told him the truth ( i always answer with something like " i dont really know anyone here " ) and he told me i should make friends, but he told me in a way as if it was so easy and if i couldnt do it, theres something wrong with me. I felt so sick, i wanted to leave school. I was finally starting to be ok with being alone until he made me feel pathetic, he probably didnt mean to but he did. 
I honestly feel sick when i think about going back there and having go sit there at break and lunch. There are no clubs i fit in, and there isnt any sports i can join yet. I feel like my whole high school life is going to be like this. I have never been so unhappy, i would never expect having no one to hang out with would make me hate myself so much. Im unable to just put myself out there, im too shy to just introduce myself to people, but i always try to contunue conversations. I guess i just want to know if anyone has gone through the same thing for a while.


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## 525826 (Aug 29, 2014)

Have you tried asking someone you know in class to sit with them during lunch?
I did that when I had no one to sit with and after, I ended up sitting with them for the next two years.

I mean you are just starting high school @[email protected]
There are plenty of people who are feeling the same way.
Maybe they don't 'appear' that way and just listen to music and make themselves busy.
I did that a lot. Sometimes I wanted to be alone, but I felt pretty good when someone
took the effort to come try to talk with me.

Try asking someone who is alone or in a small group. 
Even if they look like they are busy doing whatever or talking to the person next to them, 
they might like and welcome meeting someone new!


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## sophiam (Mar 9, 2014)

just go to the library during lunch that's what i always did


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## HopelessFriend (Aug 7, 2013)

I hated going to lunch too, in middle school and high school I sat alone. Going to the library made things a lot better, since it's an environment where you're not expected to socialize.

As for the part where the guy says making friends is so easy and that something is wrong with you if you can't, that's probably one of the most narrow-minded things I've ever heard. Everyone is different and he has no right to judge like that.


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## IronFae (Sep 8, 2014)

I know how you feel. A few days ago I started my junior year of high school and have no one to sit with at lunch. I tried to sit with these girls at lunch but for the most part they ignored me. One said," I'm sorry, I know we've had classes together but what's your name?" That made me feel great...


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## SapphicDysphoria (Aug 24, 2014)

Can't really give you advice, but I know how you feel. If you aren't able to make friends, try doing homework while you eat lunch and then at least people won't assume you that you don't have friends; it'll look like you're just too busy to socialize. For me, the problem was never having to sit alone, but rather the way people would view me if I ate lunch by myself.


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## Candycove (Sep 8, 2014)

My freshman year of High School, I was lucky because I had the same lunch period as my best friend. Sophomore year, however, I had no one to eat lunch with, and if it wasn't bad enough eating alone and being in constant fear of someone randomly looking at me, judging the way I eat, ect. I also loathed the noise of the hundreds of kids in the cafeteria. After 3 days of eating alone, I was done. I would do whatever it took to avoid going to the cafeteria. I would waste time in the nurses office, beg a teacher into letting me stay in the classroom after class, ect. I soon realized that it was easiest to just hang out at the Library during the lunch period, and sneak small snacks into class throughout the day so that I wouldn't get too hungry. 

I justified this by thinking, "I'm in High School now. The last stepping stone before becoming an adult. I think I deserve the freedom of not being trapped like a rat in the miserable cafeteria if I damn well don't want to".

It's MUCH MUCH easier to make a friend during class than it is to make a friend wile in the cafeteria. In the caf, kids tend to be far too clique-y and wont pay you any attention. In class, they're more singled out and will be far more likely to want to chat with you. Just because you eat alone in the cafeteria doesn't mean you don't have friends or can't socialize. 

The next time one of your "acquaintances" asks why you're eating alone, tell them to go suck a d*ck  haha.


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