# Can guys tell if girl is inexperienced with kissing??



## SadRosesAreBeautiful (May 15, 2008)

So, I'll be up front. I've never been kissed. I would love to be, but one of my fears is that when I do have a chance to experience this, the guy I'm kissing will be able to tell that I am very inexperienced with it, and that would be embarrassing. Are guys able to tell that a girl has little/no experience with kissing? or not?


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

I don't think I've ever been anyone's first kiss, but I've been with girls who were relatively inexperienced and they were some of the most enjoyable kisses I've had.


----------



## TATA (Sep 18, 2008)

SadRosesAreBeautiful said:


> So, I'll be up front. I've never been kissed. I would love to be, but one of my fears is that when I do have a chance to experience this, the guy I'm kissing will be able to tell that I am very inexperienced with it, and that would be embarrassing. Are guys able to tell that a girl has little/no experience with kissing? or not?


try on your girlfriend first :cuddle 
Girls are the best kissers anyways :lol


----------



## Conquistador (Sep 28, 2006)

Yeah we may be able to tell but it won't be such a big deal. We aren't as critical of it as y'all are.


----------



## path0gen (Jun 28, 2006)

Yes, we will be able to tell. Unlike Conquistator, I am critical. But I wouldn't be a dick about it, I'd just teach you how to kiss.


----------



## Tony99 (Jul 27, 2008)

Good kissing, inexperienced kissing, the right way to kiss...

All subjective in my personal opinion of the matter.

What someone may consider good or bad kissing could be different for someone else.


----------



## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

I think you can ask the same question for guys as well. Can girls tell if guys are inexperienced?


----------



## ANCIENT (Aug 9, 2005)

SadRosesAreBeautiful said:


> So, I'll be up front. I've never been kissed. I would love to be, but one of my fears is that when I do have a chance to experience this, the guy I'm kissing will be able to tell that I am very inexperienced with it, and that would be embarrassing. Are guys able to tell that a girl has little/no experience with kissing? or not?


i once kissed a girl that i could tell she didn't have much experience kissing. but i didn't care, though. just take it slow and don't rush it.


----------



## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

It wouldn't matter.....I'm a complete novice anyway.


----------



## 99x (Oct 4, 2007)

The first time I kissed a girl I was 17 and I wasn't sure what to expect. I'm a soft kisser, in my experience it felt pretty natural even for my first time. Infact I hated the way she kissed and I know I wasn't her first. First of all she smoked so it was like kissing an ash tray, and she used her tongue way to much I felt like we were tongue wrestling. I guess it really depends on the guy, everyone likes different kisses, but I'd say just act natural and be soft about it.


----------



## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

From my experience, yes, guys can tell if you're inexperienced or not. Don't worry though, they aren't critical or mean about it. Like Conquistador said, it's not a big deal for guys.


----------



## RubyTuesday (Aug 3, 2007)

The third guy I kissed, ahem, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back in 1999 - :sigh :stu !!!-
he told me I was "the best kisser he ever had".

Funny ...if only he knew my secret. I think I joked about it but there was no way I was gonna tell him.

I'll tell you though: I pretended that he wasn't there!

...yep: that's right!

And before all the guys get really incensed, like they should. 

Basically - I didn't like the guy. I was celebrating turing 21, young and curious and wanted to experiment and also just actually give a guy at a nightclub my number. So I did this with a good looking guy who asked me for my number that night. 

My sister and my best friend at the time told me off, that I shouldn't have gone into it purely for the physical aspect and I can see their point, it was a little unscrupulous and calculated and a bit desparate -but I was young and curious and bored. I called it off before he could bug me more for more!

Essentially my point is that you don't have to have experience you just need to have desire for the person.
When you don't -you're probably going to be a bad kisser. 
Likewise, I don't think experience has that much to do with it.


----------



## liarsclub (Aug 23, 2008)

kissing gives me performance anxiety.


----------



## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

I've kissed a girl who was experienced and she was just a bad kisser. You might just be a natrual at it.I dont know of any guy who would be upset about it, would probably be glad that you need more practice. :b


----------



## IlIlIlIrlpoloIlIlIlI (Feb 5, 2012)

Take it slow don't rush it. Putting your hands on her face or hair can be sexy and makes it easier to focus and control. If its someone you know well, makeing out: talking romanticly: then making out again is a nice way to go. Unless your really young, girls tend to not like it when you ask them if they want to kiss. Tonsil hockey in a nutshell.


----------



## To22 (Apr 6, 2012)

RubyTuesday said:


> ...
> *Essentially my point is that you don't have to have experience you just need to have desire for the person.
> When you don't -you're probably going to be a bad kisser.*
> Likewise, I don't think experience has that much to do with it.


I sort of agree. Desire definitely plays a huge role in the process. I wouldn't say it makes or breaks a good kissing experience but desire will probably completely change the experience.


----------



## MaxPower (May 1, 2012)

I kissed two people, and I can't tell if they were good or bad kissers. As long as you don't use teeth or too much tongue, I don't think the person would care.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

After kissing for a while you should put your hand on his crotch to feel for an erection. That would be an advanced move.


----------



## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

komorikun said:


> After kissing for a while you should put your hand on his crotch to feel for an erection. That would be an advanced move.


Are you serious?


----------



## hypestyle (Nov 12, 2003)

I wish I had any experience at all.. _sigh_..


----------



## JdActuary (Oct 1, 2012)

I would think it was cute if I was a girl's first kiss. Guys like the idea of being a girl's "first" whether it's kissing or sex or whatever. Kinda creepy to say it like that, but it's true.


----------



## LeeMann (Nov 29, 2012)

RubyTuesday said:


> Essentially my point is that you don't have to have experience you just need to have desire for the person.
> When you don't -you're probably going to be a bad kisser.


One hell of an answer. Seriously this made my day!


----------



## Cnidaria (Dec 13, 2012)

komorikun said:


> After kissing for a while you should put your hand on his crotch to feel for an erection. That would be an advanced move.


Haha, that is a good shout but maybe not for a very first kiss.

If they can they probably don't care, I once had a gap of nearly two years between one kiss and the next and I was nervous it was going to obvious that I hadn't kissed anyone in a long time, and I hadn't done much kissing in the first place, but I had no complaints.


----------



## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

RubyTuesday said:


> Essentially my point is that you don't have to have experience you just need to have desire for the person.
> When you don't -you're probably going to be a bad kisser.
> Likewise, I don't think experience has that much to do with it.


Meh, I dunno if that always holds true, when I did it it was with someone I liked and I still had no idea what to do.


----------



## Bawsome (Jan 8, 2013)

Totes, but its okay  
it sucks when a girl pretends to be an experienced kisser and tries to eat your face.


----------



## Randomdood13 (Dec 10, 2012)

Can girls tell the other way round?

I don't understand physically literally what to do how you move your mouth and tongue and things. Do you just put your tongue in and swirl it around clockwise and occasionally change directions? People do say "oh it'll come naturally for you" but I guarantee it won't and I'd be more relaxed about going for it if I knew what to do.


----------



## Green Eyes (Sep 6, 2009)

JdActuary said:


> I would think it was cute if I was a girl's first kiss. Guys like the idea of being a girl's "first" whether it's kissing or sex or whatever. Kinda creepy to say it like that, but it's true.


Even when the girl is 23 or older? Because there are many people who think it's weird if you have never kissed at that age.

I'm also afraid what a guy would think if he founds out I have never kissed.


----------



## Green Eyes (Sep 6, 2009)

Sophistrysolipsist said:


> Can girls tell the other way round?
> 
> I don't understand physically literally what to do how you move your mouth and tongue and things. Do you just put your tongue in and swirl it around clockwise and occasionally change directions? People do say "oh it'll come naturally for you" but I guarantee it won't and I'd be more relaxed about going for it if I knew what to do.


I have no experience, but I have read about it in girls magazines. There are also instruction vids on you tube. You should take a look at those. Maybe practise on your hand (sounds weird). But you never know how it really is until you tried it. Take it slow, don't stick your tong right in her mouth. 
But I don't think you can really tell if it's someones first kiss. The person can be nervous and take it slow or it can be a bad kisser.


----------



## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

Sophistrysolipsist said:


> Can girls tell the other way round?
> 
> I don't understand physically literally what to do how you move your mouth and tongue and things. Do you just put your tongue in and swirl it around clockwise and occasionally change directions? People do say "oh it'll come naturally for you" but I guarantee it won't and I'd be more relaxed about going for it if I knew what to do.


Yeah this is exactly how I feel, it definitely isn't natural for me.


----------



## GoingBaldSucks (Mar 16, 2013)

I always hated this concept of "someone doesn't know how to kiss".

A kiss is a kiss. It's not some technical math thing.

Just kiss for **** sake.


----------



## TheManInTheRedSuit (Mar 30, 2013)

Well, I've got some good news and some bad news for you. The bad news is, everyone kisses differently. The good news is, most people will kiss you the way they want to be kissed and take the lead. Most of the girls that I've kissed have been much more passionate about it than me, and they showed me how they wanted to be kissed and then I put my personal spin on it  . Some girls like your whole tongue in their mouth, some don't and like you to lick their lips, and some girls don't like tongue at all  And I don't think they can 'tell' that your inexperienced as opposed to anyone else as part of kissing is just accepting what the other person is doing to your mouth haha. The funny thing is, the only way that someone would probably be able to tell is if they are also inexperienced, but at least then you can learn together. You can try different things, and if they do it back they like it, then do it some more, this is where this "it will come naturally" as it's a physical communication between 2 people. If they kisses with their lips tightly together they probably don't want much tongue, but if they open their mouth wider then you can try this swirling etc. Does that help?


----------



## Randomdood13 (Dec 10, 2012)

Green Eyes said:


> I have no experience, but I have read about it in girls magazines. There are also instruction vids on you tube. You should take a look at those. Maybe practise on your hand (sounds weird). But you never know how it really is until you tried it. Take it slow, don't stick your tong right in her mouth.
> But I don't think you can really tell if it's someones first kiss. The person can be nervous and take it slow or it can be a bad kisser.


What do the girls magazines say? Had a look on youtube and theres not that much in detail just things about be yourself and be relaxed. Can't help but feel being myself hasn't worked thus far...

So many questions and not enough answers. Just wish I had a mutual friend who would show me like a FWB but just for kissing.


EternallyRestless said:


> Yeah this is exactly how I feel, it definitely isn't natural for me.


Nothing infuriates me more when people say things like oh just relax be yourself, it'll come naturally. The point is of having SA or things like that in which it makes it difficult is that it doesn't. For us it feels like everyone else has been given a manual on life and we haven't.


----------



## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

I don't think I could tell if a girl is inexperienced with kissing since I've never kissed before.


----------



## Haunty (Oct 24, 2008)

Experience doesn't matter and is easily fixed, if you like someone you like someone *drops mic*


----------



## mahnamahna (Apr 10, 2013)

Honestly.. I've never kissed a girl so I wouldn't mind if she's never kissed before. That's just a foolish thing to upset about IMO lol


----------



## Freiheit (Dec 8, 2008)

The first guy I fooled around with thought I came off as experienced and already did that type of thing before.


----------



## 1908 (Nov 9, 2012)

komorikun said:


> After kissing for a while you should put your hand on his crotch to feel for an erection. That would be an advanced move.


:lol That's a good move. A personal favorite of mine. Works good vice versa as well.

Anyways guys generally won't care much about your kissing skills, or lack thereof, if they're really into you. Like most things in life, you get better with experience.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

1908 said:


> :lol That's a good move. A personal favorite of mine. Works good vice versa as well.
> 
> Anyways guys generally won't care much about your kissing skills, or lack thereof, if they're really into you. Like most things in life, you get better with experience.


I don't know if it works vice versa. I don't like guys touching me in public.


----------



## 1908 (Nov 9, 2012)

komorikun said:


> I don't know if it works vice versa. I don't like guys touching me in public.


Me either.


----------



## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

Sophistrysolipsist said:


> For us it feels like everyone else has been given a manual on life and we haven't.


Wow, I've never thought of it that way but that's so true.


----------



## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

I wouldn't.


----------



## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

Something I don't get is when people say "don't pucker your lips." what do you do with them then?


----------



## Dear turtle (Sep 7, 2011)

Freiheit said:


> The first guy I fooled around with thought I came off as experienced and already did that type of thing before.


Same, though to be fair alcohol was involved.


----------



## ThatGuy11200 (Sep 3, 2012)

Before my first kiss I'd checked on the internet to see how it should be done. There are some handy how-to sites around.



EternallyRestless said:


> Something I don't get is when people say "don't pucker your lips." what do you do with them then?


Pucker slightly but you generally don't want your lips to be too firm, unless it's just a peck.


----------



## Freiheit (Dec 8, 2008)

Capcom said:


> Same, though to be fair alcohol was involved.


Yeah, I was sober. I don't think I would trust myself to do anything like that drunk because it would go too far and I might end up doing something irresponsible.


----------



## Randomdood13 (Dec 10, 2012)

ThatGuy11200 said:


> Before my first kiss I'd checked on the internet to see how it should be done. There are some handy how-to sites around.


Link any?


----------



## JohnnyR (Apr 25, 2013)

yes you can tell sometimes! But it isn't really a big issue! its not like we turned around and think god she can't kiss! Thats it game over!  if someone is decent enough that **** don't mean nothing


----------



## Nono441 (May 14, 2012)

I think it's not a problem, most relationships do not start with both parties being inexperienced. Plus everyone starts somewhere, right?

PS: I have never kissed anyone so I don't know how to kiss either. But I'd be happy for whoever I end up with to teach me (though it would be kind of cool if we were both inexperienced just for the educational moment but it's not that big a deal really)


----------



## DaydreamBeliever10 (Feb 12, 2012)

Sophistrysolipsist said:


> For us it feels like everyone else has been given a manual on life and we haven't.


I love this, it does feel like we've missed out on something and as a consequence have to struggle with even the simplest things all our lives I hate it
! I have been kissed, my first kiss was with a woman we were both drunk but it was wonderful. I think it helped that I was in love with her. My first kiss with a man was not pleasant, I didn't have any feelings for him, he only wanted sex and didn't listen to me when I said I didn't and he used too much tongue for my liking. The next time a different man tried to kiss me it just reminded me of that first unpleasant kiss/situation, I panicked and pushed him away. I have very little experience with kissing and I will worry about it if I ever get to kiss another person. I just assume they can tell but there's nothing I can do about it, I'm a very late bloomer when it comes to anything intimate but that's due to my SA so I deal with it like I do everything and try to move on.

Not much help I know, I try not to care that they can tell but it never works.


----------

