# started attending a group therapy but....



## n1kkuh (Jul 11, 2008)

But I feel that everyone is a lot more mentally sound than I am. It is a "social confidence" group, but I don't think the people there have the same feelings of public self-consciousness that I feel. Or the intense anxiety I feel when I speak to people. It seems like people are just looking for a little more confidence, they don't suffer the debilitating anxiety that I sometimes do. How would you guys feel if you were in a group where you thought that everyone had it better off than you did, but can still somewhat relate?


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## bht96 (Dec 25, 2008)

Yeah, I've been in and out of therapy and have done a lot of research lately about what the best approach is. I found that group therapy along with individual therapy is a must. But.... you have to find a therapist that knows very well how to treat social anxiety. I've been through established, "best in the city" psychiatrists and counselors who didn't know the first thing I was talking about. They would actually give me the same advice as my close acquaintances such as "you just got to go out there and do things over and over again until they get better". Finding a group that is just for social anxiety is hard to come by but you probably will find some luck locating one that is specifically "anxiety" based. If there is one or more socially anxious people in the group that you can relate to, that should do the trick. I found a therapist in my city who specializes in anxiety and has a group once a week along the lines of what I just mentioned through a website: adaa.org. Just look at the different therapists and call or email around and see if they can provide these services. You might get lucky and actually find a therapist who does offer social anxiety group sessions. I hope this helps. Sorry for the long post.


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## bht96 (Dec 25, 2008)

Sorry, for another post. I was in group therapy a year ago for substance abuse (alcohol). But, Most of us just talked about our mood disorders (which usually leads to the substance abuse in the first place). No one had SAD and I found it very hard to relate. I talked a lot about my problems at first but it just made me feel more and more uncomfortable. I just felt like these people thought they had real reasons for their depression (broken families, unemployment, etc.) and me being scared of people I thought would just be a load of BS to them. They couldn't offer support because they just didn't know what I was feeling. Whenever I would talk about my problems they would just shake their heads like they had pity for me or just say "jeez" or something along those lines. Anyway, I quickly just gave up and became more and more quiet until I just didn't say anything.


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## bbarn (Dec 22, 2007)

n1kkuh said:


> But I feel that everyone is a lot more mentally sound than I am. It


That's exactly how i feel/felt when i joined group CBT. Some people looked more confident than i did taking turns speaking out in front of the group. I just tried to note that we were all there for the same reasons, to try to get better and get a better perspective on what caused our anxiety. At first i compared myself to them but not so much anymore. I still get a little scared talking in front of everyone but i think its easier because people let you speak with an open mind and i don't feel like i'm always judged even though at times i can't help but feel like i'm a defendant on a jury stand.


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