# Talking to the hairdresser?



## aviationboy (Jan 9, 2009)

I thought i would start my own thread, however a slightly positive one i guess!

I had a haircut today, and sitting in the barbers chair got me thinking. How does everyone here deal with conversation when having a haircut? I personally find it quite difficult to strike up a conversation with the hairdresser. A few times I have managed to although it has been akward at best. I also dislike it when they ask too many questions and pry into my personal life (which i am not ashamed of although i don't exactly run around telling everyone what i do). Today was a quiet one, I hardly spoke to the guy at all! Although i was friendly on entry and exit 

So how does everyone here deal with it? Any interesting stories to tell? :teeth


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## Ohms (Sep 26, 2008)

Actually I have trouble talking to my hairdresser too, even though I have been going to her since I was born and she is also my aunt! She usually does all the talking but sometimes I just sit there and look dumb. My dad used to do his haircut the same time as me when I was young and he would talk to her the whole time and this relieved pressure off of me, but now I go by myself and ive had to adapt.


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## OrganizedChaos (Dec 18, 2008)

I, too, sometimes feel a bit awkward sitting in that chair, having nothing to say. But, I put things in perspective and realize that I'm paying this guy with my own cash, and if I wanna stay quiet, then I'll stay quiet . Besides, he's/she's your hairdresser, not your therapist.


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## Taija (Nov 3, 2008)

I never chat with the hairdresser and I always pray s/he isn't gonna start a conversation with me because I know how forced and awkward it will be.


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

I'm always very nervous going to the hairdresser, I do not enjoy the small talk at all. I usually can manage to think up enough to get through, but I always feel as if it's really tense.

I apparently have freakishly thick hair, so I'm routinely trapped in the chair while the hairdresser points me out to everyone in the salon/complains she doesn't get paid enough/shouts panickedly for extra hair clips. That part is not amusing.


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

Usually, if I don't talk much the person will get the hint.


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## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

I change were I get my haircuts a lot and I usually feel really awkward and nervous conversing with my hairdresser (especially if she's cute). I'm always worried about her messing up my hair which just adds on the anxiety.


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## Grim619 (Dec 12, 2008)

I go to A small barber shop near where I live and sometimes I get lucky and get the owner of the place who is naturally "cool" I guess. He makes small talk and I answer with small answers and he just talks about himself...
If I get this older guy we both never talk till it is over and it's usually "8 dollars please" "Keep the change"


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## caithiggs (Jan 11, 2009)

I have no problem talking to hairdressers anymore. I was one myself. lol. But I used to be so quiet, and would hate when they would be like "you don't talk much do you?" and they'd try and try and try. Frankly, that's a hairdresser with bad people skills. Technically you're supposed to read your client and find out if they do or don't like talking. I was always understanding of people who didn't like talking, and I could tell right away, and would let them be quiet. The people at the salon I worked at took this as a hint that I'm not outgoing enough for them! They all talked way too much and didn't notice the clients that needed more quiet time. It's funny how many kind of personalities there are. 

Most hairdressers hate small talk. I think some people just feel like they "have to" do it, like there is no other choice. I think they're just trying to dig for a better conversation so they don't have to keep asking superficial questions (though I admit a ton of hairdressers are still quite superficial). But I think more professionals like that should realize when a person wants to be silent.


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## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

Perfectionist said:


> I apparently have freakishly thick hair, so I'm routinely trapped in the chair while the hairdresser points me out to everyone in the salon/complains she doesn't get paid enough/shouts panickedly for extra hair clips. That part is not amusing.


They all do this to me, too, and my hair is only two inches long. I find it most embarrassing.


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## victoriangirl (Jan 2, 2009)

Finally someone else mentioning the hairdresser & small talk fear! 

I've always loved having my hair done, changing the color, the style etc. but I hated going to the hairdresser's - until - I found THE hairdresser who was not only amazingly good, but also very quiet. (!)He would just focus on his work and I could trust him with my eyes closed. (We had the same taste and he knew exactly what I meant without me uttering a word!)

But I had to move to another city and it took some time for me to find someone who was good & quiet or at least was good with being quiet. And I think I have found the one in this city as well. He is not the best, but he does not like talking which is exactly what I need! 

I also have very thin & difficult hair and all these other hairdresser's would be making comments about it. I hated that! Gosh, as if I wanted to be born with difficult hair!!! But this new guy is more professional and cuts my hair as best as he can, without mentioning how difficult, thin my hair is 

But I think it is perfectly ok to be quiet at the hairdresser's. I see other women sitting down all quiet so why not. Just make sure you stay polite, explain what you do and don't want and that's it.


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## InfiniteAnon (Dec 20, 2008)

aviationboy said:


> I thought i would start my own thread, however a slightly positive one i guess!
> 
> I had a haircut today, and sitting in the barbers chair got me thinking. How does everyone here deal with conversation when having a haircut? I personally find it quite difficult to strike up a conversation with the hairdresser. A few times I have managed to although it has been akward at best. I also dislike it when they ask too many questions and pry into my personal life (which i am not ashamed of although i don't exactly run around telling everyone what i do). Today was a quiet one, I hardly spoke to the guy at all! Although i was friendly on entry and exit
> 
> So how does everyone here deal with it? Any interesting stories to tell? :teeth


I don't like talking to the hairdresser either, because the conversation always feels forced, and fake. I would rather have the hairdresser hurry up and do my hair then to make small talk with me, the stylist next to her, and every customer that enters the salon. Sometimes I read a magazine, which lets the person know that I am not interested in socializing. Other times I give polite but short responses to her questions, letting her know that I am not interested in socializing.


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## Georgina 22 (Jan 4, 2009)

aviationboy said:


> I thought i would start my own thread, however a slightly positive one i guess!
> 
> I had a haircut today, and sitting in the barbers chair got me thinking. How does everyone here deal with conversation when having a haircut? I personally find it quite difficult to strike up a conversation with the hairdresser. A few times I have managed to although it has been akward at best. I also dislike it when they ask too many questions and pry into my personal life (which i am not ashamed of although i don't exactly run around telling everyone what i do). Today was a quiet one, I hardly spoke to the guy at all! Although i was friendly on entry and exit
> 
> So how does everyone here deal with it? Any interesting stories to tell? :teeth


Hey, i got my haircut on Friday (i made a thread on it) I don't strike up conversations with the hairdresser, i wouldn't know what to say anyway. Or nothing comes to mind. I am too busy watching what she's doing with my hair. But i am polite when i first go in or afterwards. 
The hairdressers don't usually ask questions about my personal life, only ask me about my hair. They only say "What haircut do you want?" Do you always have your side parting on this side, yeah? Do you want feathered layers? Where do you want your first layer to start? etc etc. 
I don't think i'd want the hairdresser to chatter away, i want her to just concentrate on my haircut incase she cuts it wrong.


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## KumagoroBeam (Sep 15, 2008)

i got my hair cut just last week, after not going to the hairdresser for 10+ years. so i had reaalllyyy long hair and i wanted it cut short. 
i was so relieved because the hairdresser didn't speak my language that well,, so she didn't start a conversation. i'm always friendly, but i just can't do small talk with strangers.


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## Dashman28 (Oct 8, 2008)

Sometimes the conversations I have at the hairdresser's or with a taxi driver are the only ones I'll have in days, and I usually fully enjoy it, though sometimes I feel ashamed about it. I don't feel any real anxiety because most hairdresser's I've been to are chubby chicks whose lives are nothing to shout about either, in comparison to which my life, at least the externals, is full of accomplishment and adventure. My SA is usually triggered by people who I judge to be "better" than me, which is most of the people I'm around on a daily basis, but not hairdressers. Sorry if that sounds incredibly conceited, but it's true. So yeah, sometimes I kind of enjoy talking about my life at with the hairdresser or taxi driver, even though I play it real cool like it's no big deal. Often times I can see how cool they think my job is, travels are, etc., and I guess that feels good and helps me see myself in a more positive light, since usually I just lacerate myself mentally. Again, though, I often feel shame about getting strokes from the hairdresser.


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## TheVoid (Nov 2, 2008)

I hate talking while getting a haircut. I am like "just shut up and do your thing so I can go home" 

I also dislike it when they come and ask me if I need something to drink. I know they are doing it for customer care but it's a real pain in the ***. I get tempted to tell him/her to bring me a "tea with two and a half spoons of sugar, extra bit of lemmon added with a milk coating but not too hot" to see how they react 

I need to pass my time quietly and peacefully. Having a person behind me constantly watching my face and hair through a mirror is enough stress already


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## MeganC (Nov 23, 2008)

I haven't had my hair cut in awhile, but I never feel terribly uncomfortable talking to hairdressers (or cab drivers for that matter). The way I see it, you may only see this person once in your life and whatever you say to them will, at the least, go through one ear and out the other, or at the most, inject some levity into a pretty mundane activity. Sometimes, if the conversation is really good, you get cut a break when it comes time to pay up for services rendered. Always a bonus.


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## Still Waters (Sep 18, 2008)

This was once a big problem for me!! I'd come up with every excuse possible to put off getting a haircut. I would go to different hair salons - Fantastic Sams,The Cut Zone-different places and it was always nerve wracking. Now I've found a little shop that's privately owned and I see the same woman everytime,it makes a huge difference in my comfort level.


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## nemasket (Mar 23, 2007)

I always hope I'll get a chatty hairdresser, so I can just ask questions and let them go off on a tangent. I agree that it's hard when they ask a lot of personal questions (Do you have a boyfriend? What do you do for fun?), although the older I get, the less I get asked things like that


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

pita said:


> They all do this to me, too, and my hair is only two inches long. I find it most embarrassing.


Yeah, mine is about halfway down my back. I went and got it styled for my high school grad some years back and was told it is so thick and long I need to actually mention it when I call to make an appointment so they know to allot me additional time.

Most embarassing is right.


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## citizen_erased (Dec 18, 2007)

I love having my hair done and getting it coloured and cut, but i hate sitting in that chair. I hate how i feel like i'm supposed to be all chatty and engage in tedious small talk with the hairdresser, when all i do is sit there looking and feeling awkward. Not that any of the hairdressers at my local salon (i've been going to the same one for years and don't realily mind which hairdresser does my hair) ever give me those sort of, "You're so quiet aren't you?" type comments, but still i just can't help but feel like there's a sort of unsaid expectation to be somewhat sociable in this sort of setting, an unwritten rule that's impossible for me to live up to.

Now i've put this into words and read it through i realise that it sounds pretty silly, but i still can't help how i feel in that situation.


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## General Specific (Mar 4, 2008)

I don't get nervous going to the hairdressers but I still find it incredibly awkward because I can't think of much to say and feel as though I'm too quiet.


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## snowfly (Dec 14, 2008)

I got mine last week, after 5 minutes of awkward silence she randomly asked what my middle name was.


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## TheStrange (Dec 1, 2008)

nemasket said:


> I always hope I'll get a chatty hairdresser, so I can just ask questions and let them go off on a tangent. I agree that it's hard when they ask a lot of personal questions (Do you have a boyfriend? What do you do for fun?), although the older I get, the less I get asked things like that


I hate having my hair cut. I mean REALLY hate it.:afr My biggest fear is the mirror! Not only do I hate having to look at myself, but it always feels like the person waiting is looking at me through the mirror and judging me.::afr


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## thesceptic (Nov 2, 2008)

My most embarrassing moment in the barber's chair was when they asked me what films I had seen recently after I had just told them I had been to the cinema a few times that month. My mind went blank and my answer was a rather vague 'just the latest stuff'. Epic embarrassment.

I'm quite comfortable with chatting to the hairdressers now, though I still dislike the small talk. I'd hate to be a hairdresser, asking the same dross of every person who comes in.


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## SadRosesAreBeautiful (May 15, 2008)

aviationboy said:


> I thought i would start my own thread, however a slightly positive one i guess!
> 
> I had a haircut today, and sitting in the barbers chair got me thinking. How does everyone here deal with conversation when having a haircut? I personally find it quite difficult to strike up a conversation with the hairdresser. A few times I have managed to although it has been akward at best. I also dislike it when they ask too many questions and pry into my personal life (which i am not ashamed of although i don't exactly run around telling everyone what i do). Today was a quiet one, I hardly spoke to the guy at all! Although i was friendly on entry and exit
> 
> So how does everyone here deal with it? Any interesting stories to tell? :teeth


It's awkward for me. I never know what to say. I did go to a male hairdresser when I was younger and he kept trying to hook me up with his son. I had never met his son, but apparently he was born in the same hospital three days before I was and while my mom was in the wheelchair (and I in her stomach) 'cause she had gone into labor, the hairdresser, his wife and newborn son were passing by (my dad and the hairdresser knew each other in HS or something). (Whoa  that was a long sentence)

So, anyway, every time he would cut my hair, it never failed, he would talk about that moment in the hospital and that it was fate that we should hook up. Lol, gotta love fate.

Now I have a female hairdresser and she's always asking me personal questions. I always give her short and vague answers. It gets on my nerves but I guess she's gotta fill the silence somehow.


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## Want2Bconfident (Sep 14, 2008)

It depends how chatty and nice the hairdresser is. I like to chat to the hairdresser, but its difficult if he/she doesn't talk much. I find it awkward and uncomfortable if for 20 minutes we don't speak at all. Just talk about anything, it doesn't really matter.


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## mypasswordneverworks (Dec 12, 2008)

I HATE hairdressers! They always want to talk about your business. I just want them to do my hair and shut up. no chit chat! and you don't need to know my business!


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## solasum (Nov 17, 2008)

I hate the small talk. Is it really necessary? Even my brother detests the small talk, and he doesn't have SA. I try to go to a different place each time. 100th post!


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## mistermet (Jan 26, 2008)

this is definitely a topic i've thought about many a time. i've been going to the same hairdresser for a good 3 or so years now, and i barely talk to him on my own. it's a shame too, because he's a really nice guy and he talks to me a bit when i'm in the chair (i don't mind that, it just scares me to start on a topic with him). every time i go, i try to think to myself that "this will be the time i talk with him" but every time, i just sit there and let him start the conversation. i guess i feel like i don't want to distract him while he's working on me or something.


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## Lirael (Jan 6, 2009)

The last hairdresser I had didn't try to make much small talk with me but he still made me feel very uncomfortable. He would constantly rest his crotch on me, which might have been necessary to cut a certain angle though he could have said excuse me or something! One time I was wearing jeans that sort of pulled back when I sat down and he would keep looking down and going "Woohoo!". He seemed to be shamelessly checking me out a lot of the time. The second and last time he cut my hair, we went to a small sectioned off area where they did the shampooing and he talked to another hairdresser in graphic detail about his latest cannodling...with men... By the way I was only 13 so this was all the more anxiety inducing for me not to mention just plain old traumatizing.


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## ShortestRaymond (Dec 4, 2008)

I wouldn't mind hairdresser small talk if it was actually small talk - like the weather, or if they talked about themselves, but a lot of them immediately ask you what you do, if you're single, where you're from, basically expecting you to tell them your life story.

Now I ALWAYS take a book with me and politely apologise at the start saying I can't handle staring in the mirror at myself for that long. Then I ignore them till the haircut is finished. I'm not sure if that's rude, but otherwise I'd probably never go to a hairdressers.


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## jollybeans (Dec 8, 2008)

ahhhh i hate nosey hairdressers! i like when they judt do your hair and shut up:no . its okay when they talk about themselves or the weather but dont get in my business, its not your bizz what school im going to or what my pay is at work! lol. i just try to close my eyes or put on my ipod so i dont look interested


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## sanspants08 (Oct 21, 2008)

The lady who cuts my hair is nice to talk to, until she gets too anxious and cuts off too much of my hair as a result. She causes her own problems by talking about her sons, who stress her out.


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## ecstasy (Jan 4, 2009)

It makes me feel bad that I don't talk much to him, yet the whole salon is loud with chatter from other hairdressers and their clients...I'm like how..how do they just go on and on about nothing..some hairdressers are better and ask questions like they're just an old friend.


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## HoneyyDew (Jan 15, 2009)

thats ones of the reasons i hate going to get a haircut the most--talking to the hairdresser. it's awkward when i don't say anything and it's awkward when i doo. and i don't know what to say at the end when im not satisfied with my haircut at all, i don't want to offend themm.. there was a hairdresser that i liked, and actually enjoyed talking to but she left and i dunno what happened to her =s


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

When I was younger the hairdresser/barber would always ask why I was so quiet. I just cut my own hair now. It's easy and I don't have to deal with more awkward social interaction. At least it's easy for me because my head is basically shaved.


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## ci444ci (Sep 23, 2012)

I've experienced many different hairdressers.I remember one kept asking me if I was ok because I wasn't talking much. Another hairdresser that I've recently been to doesn't talk much and she's very friendly.


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## Rachama2 (Jan 16, 2013)

I have to go to the hair salon tuesday! Not really looking forward to talking to her,, allthough I''m reaaaally looking forward to my new hair style.. hehe but I have to sit there for approximately 2 and a half/3 hours... OMG and she laughs really weird sometimes and not say anything back, and then I just think that what I said was you know.. really funny. But I didnt mean it funny... Maybe she''s just insecure as well..


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## blue the puppy (Jul 23, 2011)

i dont talk unless they are particularly chatty. i had one hairdresser who asked a lot of questions and we actually got a conversation going. i'm getting a haircut today so we'll see what happens this time.


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## lifestandsstillhere (Jul 17, 2013)

Oh my gosh, I also hate going to the salon. I shaved my head a while back, and now I keep just reshaving it because it's a lot easier than dealing with that small talk. I'm graduating from college soon though, so I need to actually let it grow to a reasonable style for the business world. I think a lady with a shaved head would certainly make for an interesting first impression at a job interview... 

But one time the girl who was cutting my hair actually asked me if I could drive. I'm not sure why she asked me this, because I was in my early twenties at the time, so she certainly knew that I was old enough to. Hm.


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## inthewater (Mar 1, 2014)

Yeah, this is one of the reasons I neglect my hair. I hate going any place where I'm expected to engage in small talk. I know that hairdressers, etc., think you want to chat about your life, but I don't. I had to get my blood drawn last month, and they were having a hard time hitting my vein. So they brought in a nurse to talk to me to keep my mind off the poking. That made me even more uncomfortable. It was five minutes of rapid-fire personal questions. "Where are you from? Why did you move here? How long have you been here? What do you do? Do you like that? Why?" I wanted to jab the needle in my face.


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## Hallowed Ground (Dec 1, 2013)

Last time i went i could not have asked for more from the hairdresser.

She did exactly what i asked, and didn't keep asking me "are you sure you want it shorter?" and she didn't make small talk. 
She was really chatty with the people before me, so maybe she just sensed something about me, but she didn't make a deal about it so...GREAT =)


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## Justlittleme (Oct 21, 2013)

I just want to stare at myself getting the haircut lol... I could care less about the barber, even if they are nice. Who cares? They don't, so why should we.


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## jesse93 (Jun 10, 2012)

I just recently had my hair cut, and to my surprise, the lady doing my hair for once in my life didn't try to pry into my personal life, she let me sit there quietly, and it actually didn't feel awkward either. It was pretty nice for once, I'm so use to the hair dresser asking all these personal questions.


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## guitarmatt (Aug 13, 2009)

i hate getting my hair cut as well. I've always just gone the silent route and assumed it was okay to sit there and not say much. But now I'm an "adult" I feel like they expect me to carry a conversation, something i can't really do. So I feel like I'm just going to make it awkward every time I go in, and thats usually how i feel afterwards.


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## anxious87 (Oct 6, 2013)

A conversation typically doesn't occur. I feel pretty uncomfortable there, so I try to get it cut enough so I only have to go a few times a year.


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## BarryLyndon (Jun 29, 2010)

Lol...I just put my head down and close my eyes. Some have small talk but I just cant conversate with a barber for some reason.


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## Starryy (Apr 9, 2014)

I just cut my hair myself to avoid the hairdressers


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## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

Noone can have a worse hairdresser than me. He talks non-stop(incoherently), about himself, in English with an Italian accent. He's a pro at his trade, though, so I endure it. It's been heavy exposure, to say the least. It's probably good for me.


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## SarahJoy (Apr 10, 2014)

I've gone to my hair dresser for years. But, even after all these years I still hate the chit chat you are pressured to do when getting your hair done. I am not a small talk girl. Most of the time we're just silent except for an occasional question. She's used to me being this way now, so it's not really awkward anymore. Although, I still feel bad sometimes especially when I see her talking to the other customers. It makes me feel like a bore. lol


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## TheLastDreamer (Mar 27, 2014)

The last time I had a haircut, the hairdresser took a picture of my hair in his cellphone. I froze and stood like a statue. I was too afraid to ask the reason why he wanted to take a picture :<


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## Caramelito (Apr 6, 2014)

The thing I hate the most is the fact that I'm paying someone to do such an easy job. So, I bought a few years ago my own scissors and started cutting off my own hair every first quarter of the moon... Youtube was also very helpfull so I taught myself... I can't complain lol.


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## Socialanxiety11 (Oct 3, 2011)

i LOVE talking to my stylist. I enjoy going to the salon, she helps me a lot.


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## LaChocolatine (Apr 23, 2012)

I find it quite awkward at the hairdressers as well!
I feel really uncomfortable making eye contact with myself in the mirror for that length of time, so I usually end up just watching whatever the hairdresser is doing in the mirror.
But then I worry that that might be off-putting for them...

Definitely over-thinking this! :b

I'm quite lucky though, whenever I go, the hairdresser tends to make a bit of small-talk at the beginning but then usually has the radio on and leaves a few magazines around (Although it's a little hard to read and keep my head straight at the same time) so I'm not really under that much pressure to keep up a conversation the whole time. 
Though I feel a bit uncomfortable when there's someone next to me getting their hair done as well and they're chatting away to their hairdresser like they've known each other for years and I'm just sitting there in silence.


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## DasBoot89 (Mar 20, 2012)

As a kid I remember not talking. I wondered, why do I have to talk to them? I'm paying them to cut my hair.

Which is partially the reason why I have not gone in 6 years. I cut my own hair. Luckily, I'm a guy and this is quite easy.

It's also convenient to be able to do it whenever I want to, without having to wait or go anywhere.

I did not find it relaxing to have someone cut my hair. I usually like to be dependent and only rely on myself for stuff that directly benefits me.

It always astonishes me how some folks will gain such rapport with people like bartenders, restaurant servers, barbers, etc......they know each other on a first name basis, etc.

I never put much thought into it. I'm not there to talk or be superficial "friends." I'm there to buy a drink, or eat food, or whatever......you know? It's like I fully understand why they WANT to talk to me.....because they figure they will get a bigger tip. So I can't fully appreciate their friendliness as being totally legitimate, because they have an ulterior motive. But I totally understand why, it doesn't make me angry. But I'd rather not talk to them. I'll be nice and civil to them if they provide me with what I requested and didn't make any horrible errors. Beyond that, please leave me alone!

Besides, I will never go to a restaurant alone. Only with family or whatever. Even then I'd rather order out. I just find it more comfortable to be in my own environment. I can also honestly tell you that I would rather serve myself rather than have someone else do it. It just seems kind of weird to have someone doing something for me that I am perfectly capable of doing myself. I'm like that with a lot of things.

It is easier to do something myself than asking someone else to do it. That's just an extra step where you introduce more BS and talking and nonsense and unnecessary drama. All of that can be avoided by accomplishing the task by myself.


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## lifestandsstillhere (Jul 17, 2013)

I just realized that hair stylists/barbers are basically the ultimate people to practice socializing with. If you think about it, it's a one-time thing. If it's too awkward, I can just go somewhere else or get a different stylist next time. It's definitely not as high-stakes as work interaction...


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

This thread is ancient.. but Ill reply anyways since I am a hairdresser. I cut a lot of peoples hair, and some want to talk while others dont. I can always tell when people are itching to converse with me because they wont shut up about random topics, so I ask them whatever questions come to mind and just agree with whatever they say. If people dont want to talk, thats fine too. Ill just ask them questions strictly about their haircut. Most hairdressers probably wont give a **** what you do/say theyre just trying to get a tip and will go off of whatever you want to do.


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## kat37 (May 22, 2013)

I perform for my hair dresser (known her since I was 16). I come in and switch from topic to topic. I get jealous if she seems to be having a better conversation when she moves to a different client if my hair is processing.


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## mama kelsey (Apr 22, 2014)

If the hairdresser asks me questions or brings something up I have no problem responding on the topic. That part isn't awkward. And the flow of conversation is normal and comfortable.

But I feel extremely uncomfortable asking them questions or bringing something up on my own. What if they don't want to answer my question? What if I seem like I'm prying? What if I sound stupid? This is the part of conversation that has always been hard for me. Being the one to start it!


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## Slytherclaw (Jul 16, 2011)

Oh god, I always feel so uncomfortable with hairdressers. I can never win. If I don't talk it's awkward, and if I do talk it's 2x as awkward because I feel like I'm talking too much. I feel more on the safe side if I give one-word answers to absolutely everything and occasionally give her details about my haircut that I really don't want f-ed up.


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## Candicane (Mar 29, 2016)

*Two days..*

(It's 23:50 on the Tuesday as I'm writing this)
On Thursday I have to go to my first hairdressers appointment alone. I have asked my friend to come with me, and she agreed, but I have little to no faith of her actually showing up on time. In the past my parents have taken me, thus helping me avoid small talk with the hairdresser, but this time they are both busy when my appointment is and can't take me. I have chosen a reference picture, I've looked up the typical small talk online, I've done everything I can to make sure I don't end up being that one person who's just awkwardly sat in the chair not talking. Usually when I am forced to make small talk with strangers it's not that bad whilst it's happening, so I think my SA trigger is the thought of failing at talking to someone I don't know. It probably doesn't help that I'm going to be sat in the chair for a while since I'm going from waist length hair to a jaw-length bob in one session. I'm starting to think I probably should have asked a more reliable friend to come with me.

(That friend doesn't understand my fear and keeps saying "can't we just meet up afterwards" to which I always reply with "but I'm scared to talk to the hairdresser):frown2:


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## Candicane (Mar 29, 2016)

mama kelsey said:


> If the hairdresser asks me questions or brings something up I have no problem responding on the topic. That part isn't awkward. And the flow of conversation is normal and comfortable.
> 
> But I feel extremely uncomfortable asking them questions or bringing something up on my own. What if they don't want to answer my question? What if I seem like I'm prying? What if I sound stupid? This is the part of conversation that has always been hard for me. Being the one to start it!


Yess you have the same problem as me! I get nervous even thinking about trying to make small talk, let alone actually making it. Most of the time if there's a silence then my mouth will literally freeze shut until the other person says something .


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## Charleyy (Oct 8, 2012)

I haven't been to the hairdressers in years. I just hack my hair off whenever it gets too long. I'd prefer having terrible hair than enduring the small talk or silence while being stuck in one place. Plus they have to get all up in your face  Awkward.


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## peytonfarquar (Feb 8, 2011)

Klonopin is how I deal with it. Or several drinks beforehand.

Before that, I would just let my hair grow out. Social anxiety was part of the very reason I used to have long hair!


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