# No One Likes Me



## JupiterStarr (Nov 4, 2010)

It seems that no matter how friendly and polite I am towards others no one likes me. I'm a very forgettable person. Does anyone else have this problem?


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## JupiterStarr (Nov 4, 2010)

Sometimes I just feel like giving up.


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## gilt (Jan 7, 2010)

I've read some of your posts and you seem very nice. Sometimes people can be wrapped up in their own personal issues, and it's easy to misinterpret them. Some people respond to me, most don't - that's life!

By the way I like your avatar.


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## William H (May 4, 2010)

its seems to me that you succeed in all these interactions. you cannot control how others behave. if you behave to your standards then its not important what others do or how they respond.


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## nork123 (Oct 22, 2009)

pretty much, the only friends I really have are ones I made quite early on in school where it kinda happened naturally because we where around each other all the time, I don't really know how to make friends now though, im just quite a forgettable person aswell I guess and no one really cares if im around or not


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## Still Waters (Sep 18, 2008)

Are you referring to this site? With so many people coming and going it takes a bit of time to feel you've made an impression here. In the big wide world,yes it's difficult,people are all about self-promotion. We tend to be less comfortable selling ourselves. I find I rather prefer the "average" people,they aren't as exhausting and demanding. Oh and by the way,being nice is undervalued in today's world-but not by the people who really count! Don't give up!!


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## notMiceElf (Nov 29, 2010)

I'm the same way.. I moved to many times and I couldn't keep friends. I didn't make friends at my new schools and I eventually dropped out and now I'm back in a alternative school where I talk to people but nothing leaves the school. I feel like such a looser.


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## bijounk (Dec 8, 2010)

I feel exactly the same way.

The only "friends" I have ever made only used my over-niceness and then dumped me when they didn't need me anymore (and I'm talking about 30+ adult friends, not teenage friends). Even my husband treats me like a convenience.

I always try to be really nice and helpful and always put others ahead of myself and I always end up alone. I've even tried to act super self-confident and to put on a strong facade but I guess everyone always sees through it. I don't understand what's wrong with me. I have no idea how people make friends. Sometimes I wonder if being friends with someone just means you have a mutual agreement to use each other when ever it's convenient and somehow people like you and I just miss the social cues and don't convey a willingness to accept the terms.

I'm sorry you are in the same situation but it is nice to know that there's another me out there. Hopefully we'll figure it out some day


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## THEuTASTEsOFeINKd (Apr 10, 2010)

Chyea, got the same problem. In a group people always talk more to eachother than me. In highschool I would make friends with people quite easily for the most part but then when my friends who I introduced eachother to became friends I would always get thrown to the side. Now a days I just can't even make friends. At family events I'm the cousin who people avoid talking to... Even on Call of Duty Black Ops I try to start talking to people and after awhile they just start ignoring me. -_-


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## Rubisco (Nov 20, 2010)

Sounds just like me. I have no idea what I'm doing wrong! I'm polite, I try to keep conversations going, I smile, but everyone seems to prefer the company of other people to me. I'm sick of feeling so secondary.


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## Deathinmusic (Jun 5, 2009)

I feel the same way. I'm not sure if it's that people really don't like me or just that I don't know how to talk to others / carry a conversation / act in social situations. The end result is always the same though. Nobody talks to me or wants to hang out with me.


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## bijounk (Dec 8, 2010)

What is wrong with us? Maybe we shouldn't be so polite. Maybe we should be rude and self-centered like everyone else, then we might seem worth their time!


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## wxolue (Nov 26, 2008)

hm. Has every single person you met told you they don't like you? In fact, has anyone told you they don't like you?


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## wade (Dec 4, 2010)

I have not made a huge amount of friends other than people I have known for a long time. I would not be too hard on yourself. Everyone will go thru various things. I make friends when I can and soemtimes I do not make them but I take things best I can.


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## Moody99 (Dec 20, 2008)

*This happens to me all the time I feel so invisiable to the world...I could be somewhere with one other person or maybe two and the person that's doing the greeting only greets the people that's with me, they don't even give me eye-contact...I could be smiling giving them eye-contact,and they just diss me like I'm not even there....I feel like people don't like me no matter how I am,if i'm my true self which is shy/quiet a little nervous,friendly and kind,I'm not liked....if i'm begin to talk and be a little talkative and speak whatever is on my mind or act a little goofy,i'm not liked...now if I was to act mean and have an attuide and be rude,I will be labeled as a mean bitter b!tch...with a lot of hang-ups. I can't win either way...people always see me as a person that they don't want to know or understand...and looked up as weird or crazy...people make me sick sometimes with their mixed up in the mind selfs!*


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## ont6 (Nov 1, 2010)

i used to be so nice i've pretty much stopped that and now i'm apparently a *****.

i actually *want *to be invisible


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## pacoismybear (Dec 8, 2010)

You said you were forgetable. Sometimes I feel like this. People forget my name so easily, it gets quite annoying. One time this guy I was pretty close to was calling over to me from across the courtyard at school and he yelled "Hey, Carol!" My name is Caitlyn. Jerk. Anyway, I had known this guy for over a year. And there was a time when we used to talk almost every day. I just glared at him, corrected him, then walked away. He seemed to think the whole ordeal was funny. Sometimes I just hate people.


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## ChoirBoy (Oct 2, 2009)

I wouldn't say that NO ONE likes me, but yeah, I often feel left out in a group


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## beatlesgirl (Nov 19, 2010)

yeah.. people always forget me.. no matter how hard I try to be friendly and polite and try to talk to them...
they always forget me..


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## LALoner (Dec 3, 2008)

JupiterStarr said:


> It seems that no matter how friendly and polite I am towards others no one likes me. I'm a very forgettable person. Does anyone else have this problem?


You have to find the magic button on the back of your head that lets you "love yourself first". When you find it tell me where it is.


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## sherry09 (Nov 27, 2010)

yes, def feel the same way...or people are just mean or jealous or ...flat out mean...for no reason...if youre a jerk and people dont like you....then maybe theres a reason...(maybe)...but if youre a good person or nice and people dont like you.. dont even worry about it because they are losers and maybe they have thier own pathetic reasons for not liking you which is no fault of your own. youre probably caring nice sweet and soft spoken and for the people out there these days, that is a sign they can walk all over you and not much else...bnut applaud yourself for being a great person and know u are much better than them....i know im not forgettable as people 'always' remember me...ie who i am...but they arent friendly to me and generally mean....ie they go out of their way to do something terrible to me...so its more like its always negativity if they do remember me....its either ignore or abuse...i completely do not care about people anymore....and have resorted to taking that attitude b/c its so hard to be caring in a society with such terrible people or those who are bad to you....it makes it easier...though its not by choice...it just happens once uve been through too much and finally 'devolve' into somjething like what those jerks might be like out of lack of being able to cope....its hard to be a kind caring person in a society full of angry monsters basically...


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## JupiterStarr (Nov 4, 2010)

Thank you all for the responses.



Still Waters said:


> *Are you referring to this site?* With so many people coming and going it takes a bit of time to feel you've made an impression here. In the big wide world,yes it's difficult,people are all about self-promotion. We tend to be less comfortable selling ourselves. I find I rather prefer the "average" people,they aren't as exhausting and demanding. *Oh and by the way,being nice is undervalued in today's world-but not by the people who really count! Don't give up!!*


No, I'm referring to real life. And I agree with you and others in this thread who have mentioned that being nice and quiet isn't valued in this society. I think this is my issue as to why no one seems to like me. Those of us that are quiet and nice in this society are forgettable. I guess I'll just be forgotten, because being loud and/or mean takes a lot of energy out of me.



gilt said:


> I've read some of your posts and you seem very nice. Sometimes people can be wrapped up in their own personal issues, and it's easy to misinterpret them. Some people respond to me, most don't - that's life!
> 
> *By the way I like your avatar.*


Thanks. Jupiter is one of my favorite planets.


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## Jennifer Clayton (Nov 19, 2010)

It's weird that we can be so polite, so friendly and people act like we are so forgettable. I hate being forgotten. I always constantly feel forgotten. It kills me so much in my heart.

It's like we have to be overdramatic and preppy to be cared about...


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## Born to be alone (Jun 23, 2013)

Same thing goes to me, i got no friends too. i have tried millions of time be social with everyone i mate but it still doesn't work. But i have discovered something.... there are majority of people born to be loved and liked but there are minority of people born to be alone, rejected and hated. I'm among those in that minority group of people. but i will keep going with this life, no matter people reject me or hate me. Remember one thing, lion always walk alone n pig alway move in group. We are lions, don't afraid to pigs.


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## Born to be alone (Jun 23, 2013)

Same thing goes to me, i got no friends too. i have tried millions of time be social with everyone i met but it still doesn't work. But i have discovered something.... there are majority of people born to be loved and liked but there are minority of people born to be alone, rejected and hated. I'm among those in that minority group of people. but i will keep going with this life, no matter people reject me or hate me. Remember one thing, lion always walk alone n pig alway move in group. We are lions, don't afraid to pigs.


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## CW1985 (Jan 6, 2013)

Yep I get that feeling.

I try to be nice to people, but it never seems to get me anywhere. Any nice feelings I have towards them never get reciprocated, so I just wonder if there's something wrong with me.

Hell, I thought I had a real friend recently, and I always felt she cared for me. But it seems I was just an inconvenience to her and I was the only one that really wanted the friendship to work.


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## ReverseMirror (May 27, 2013)

JupiterStarr said:


> It seems that no matter how friendly and polite I am towards others no one likes me. I'm a very forgettable person. Does anyone else have this problem?


I have the exact same problem it's like no matter how friendly, funny or hard I try to get close to people, they just forget about me and distance themselves from me. I had to go through this mostly all throughout high school.


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## cybernaut (Jul 30, 2010)

Yes. And not to brag, but I even think that I'm "too nice of person" + really chill.With all the cruelness in this society today, you would think that those would be favorable characteristics. Unfortunately, niceness isn't enough to obtain one's friendship these days.


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## sj86 (Jun 7, 2013)

I feel the same way as others on this post. But I'm also forgettable if not put to the side. Maybe we have to practice or part take in some activity or something, I don't know.


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## JSchultz (Aug 30, 2013)

I feel the same as well. As much as I agree that people who are rude seem to catch all the breaks while kind, polite people are taken advantage of, my perspective leans more towards that people are just plain fake. This has happened multiple times with different friends of mine in the past - I have a really great time with them, great conversations and memorable jokes....sometimes they will tell me I'm their best friend, will genuinely miss me and all that, then make no effort to talk to me after, or even ignore my texts. How do people say meaningful things like that and then act as if it never happened and forget I exist? I don't understand


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## DavidSwan23 (Aug 21, 2013)

don't let people get to you. don't assume people automatically dislike you on sight. when you get the chance, let them know the real you no matter how embarrassing it is. they came into the world the same way you did. generally speaking, it's better to face people in person. you can leave a better impression and... well, they are less likely to ignore you on the spot. people like answering to others.


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## Kibo tai Zetsubo (Aug 27, 2013)

I feel exactly the same way. I've spent most of my life going out of my way to be nice to and do things for people to try and "buy" their affection, and as I look around at my life right now I see nothing to show for it. when I need people the most they aren't there. sometimes the urge to give up and end it is pretty strong.


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## Dubbi (Aug 26, 2013)

I try to be friendly and supportive, and I feel people tend to like me, but only to a superficial degree; no one ever asks me to hang out with them or join their friend group. Sometimes, I want to act like a complete jerk, as being nice to people gets me nowhere - granted, I'd still be alone, but I wouldn't feel used and mistreated; in such a case, I at least would deserve my isolation.


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## 117308 (Oct 19, 2013)

I definitely feel that way, all the time. I have no one to turn to, I don't personally think I have social anxiety because I will go up and talk to people and try to make friends, and with the so called "friends" I do have, I'm the only one that makes effort to talk to them, they could care less it seems. Trust me, you are FAR from alone. I am very much an introvert and I do like staying in by myself a lot, I love my alone time, but it would be so nice to actually have some real friends.. how I have not found any yet is what blows my mind but no one seems to even bother with me. It's whatever and honestly it really isn't your problem if they don't like you, it's their own problem I am sure you're a cool person just people are a**holes.. keep your head up, you're not alone!


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

I definitely feel this way sometimes. I feel like people hate me, or think I'm weird or strange.

There's nothing you can do about it, though. People will think what they think. The best thing to do is to just live with who you are, and just try not to worry about the haters.


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## GMR21 (Sep 14, 2013)

Yeah about the forgettable part I feel this way sometimes. Like I have the most boring personality and no one even notices if I am here or not. I like to think that there is always someone that cares about you though, even if it seems like no one cares.


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## Mrs Foggyhead (Sep 29, 2013)

I get so sad when I'm speaking to someone and another person comes up and starts talking to the one whom I was speaking to and both turn away from me while I'm in mid-sentence. Makes me feel like what I was saying was not all that important. For that matter, I guess I'm not really that important. Just discouraging.


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## Christof (Apr 24, 2013)

Yes nobody even moves to me when I am in a room I mean with my family, they prefer rushing to my sister who obviously has more funny things to say ... Well apart of that, I feel also like despised everywhere I go ... Curiously, people tend to stare at me when I go out on the streets , strange feeling


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## Trevor Reznik (Oct 19, 2013)

me neither and my whole life i've always felt like a total outsider no matter where i go or what i do


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## Christof (Apr 24, 2013)

Yeah buddy the same too


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## starguitar (Oct 20, 2013)

A strategy I have used several times in my life: 

Become friends with an extroverted, life of the party person that you really like. Social butterflies are easy to make friends with as they want to have as many friends as possible. They will introduce to a ton of people who can also become your friends. Your social circle will expand exponentially. As you meet more friends, these friends will introduce you to even more people. 

What will make this work though is that you will need to get out of your comfort zone very frequently. You will be invited out a lot. Like a whole lot. You will have tons of social interaction. I never used this strategy on purpose. I am just naturally drawn to extroverted types. As a matter of fact, many people make friends in this very manner. But I am so introverted, that I can't handle being asked to go out all the time - I need my space and my alone time. If you are not introverted like me, this may be your best solution.


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## mike3121 (Nov 11, 2012)

I too am disliked by about everyone I meet. I'm a combat wounded veteran and just plain don't get along with other men. I try to be nice and have a conversation but it always ends badly. I have no friends, never have. I was once in a PTSD veterans support group but had to leave it; everyone was glad to see me go. Except for my wife it's a very lonely existence. I guess we never can see ourselves. Oh sure we see flaws in others but not our own. I'm afraid for the future. My wife has stage 4 breast cancer. I'm terrified of being alone without her to talk to.


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## nothing else (Oct 27, 2013)

Doesn't work, it's not that easy. 

Most of my acquaintances are extreme extroverts. They do introduce you to a lot of people and you get invited out a lot. However, once they see with time (which trust me takes no more than two social events) that your'e shy, they end up leaving you anyway. They end up gravitating towards more talkative people and you end up either standing and sitting in a corner on your own or forever become known as the 'quiet' guy that people just don't bother with.


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## Shirotora (Aug 19, 2013)

Yeah me too, seems like being nice does the opposite effect of making friends. :/ Well that's how I'm thinking these days, I wish I could stop caring on what people think of me so I won't be as stressed out.


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## Kalliber (Aug 18, 2012)

I feel like I'm the one who doesn't like people..just most I consider really annoying.


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## katienc28 (Jul 3, 2010)

*yes*

i feel all the time people don't like me. for no reason really. i'm not rude or annoying in my opinion. i do get the "why are you so quiet", or "why do you always look mad" all the time but i am not mean to people. my boyfriend is the exact opposite of me. he is a people person. he has many friends and plays pool at least 5 days a week. i have been with him for a little over 3 years and he told me a long time ago that everyone thinks i'm crazy. we were fighting at the time so i think he was just trying to hurt my feelings but i wonder if it was the truth... if everyone he hangs around thinks i'm crazy or something. then there is where i used to work. i worked my butt off all the time. i did my job. i always felt like there were people making fun of me for whatever reason. i didn't do anything. i kept to myself and did my job. yet i still felt people were being mean to me just because i kept to myself. i have been unemployed since july now and dread getting another job, even though i really need one, for fear of being singled out and treated like trash i guess again.


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## saffant (May 26, 2010)

Where the f*** are you people? I'll be your friend; need some myself; don't care how weird you are... to an extent.


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## Iwannabemyself (Mar 24, 2004)

I find I rather prefer the "average" people,they aren't as exhausting and demanding. Oh and by the way,being nice is undervalued in today's world-but not by the people who really count! Don't give up!![/QUOTE]

I like what Still waters said. Being nice is so undervalued in this day and age. I feel the same that people don't like me for some reason. I feel odd and people don't talk to me (unless they feel sorry for me) - which is one way I try to get people to hang out with me. It's sad I know.

But I realized that the sad truth is people are only focusing on themselves. Not me. And the reason why they don't want to talk to me is because I tend to be a bit aloof. (some people like that) But a lot of the time, people just want someone to take interest in them, to love them, blah blah. I think the problem with me is that I am uninterested, withdrawn and appear uncaring. Even though I want to show care to the other person, and want to take interest in them. (I am still struggling with trying to be interested and showing concern to others) But first I have to stop obsessing about myself and how I come across!


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## SoItEnds (May 20, 2014)

*Hey Guys*

I just want to say that i feel like you.
I had 3 "main-friends" in kindergarden and later on i was allways with "my" three friends. I felt good in my 4-people-group, i never needed any other people around me. Ecspecially one of them was like all i needed. She was my friend since we were children an lived near me. But after we moved away we lost contact, they became a trio and when i came back half a year later (my mom found a job near our old home) they didn´t need me anymore. I was so sad and maby at least angry, i felt like everybody is against me. My best friend told me that she doesnt want me to be near her anymore because the girl who replaced me was jealous and afraid that i could replace her. It just broke something inside of me...
Only one of my three old friend stayed. But because everybody bullied me she did too just to make new friends herself. She is somebody who tries to look intelligent and different (like sheldon cooper... she just behaves like him) and i am just trying to be polite but the people bully me and like her.
Everytime i am about to make friends they just like forget me. I´m not important to anybody. Sometimes i start talking and just become more and more quiet becouse nobody listens. 
There are people who are always in the middle of everything. And i could be dancing naked in this middle and everybody would still forget me.


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## macapuno (May 20, 2014)

Yeah, I feel this way, too. I think what you're doing now is totally fine -- getting people to like you takes time and repeated interaction, and social anxiety keeps you from that sometimes, which is understandable. One ideal that I try to hold onto is that I should focus more on finding things to like about others and saying so, rather than being liked, and the rest will follow. (Sorry if this sounds basic lol).


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## costa97977 (Jun 18, 2014)

beatlesgirl said:


> yeah.. people always forget me.. no matter how hard I try to be friendly and polite and try to talk to them...
> they always forget me..


That's how I feel. I thought I had made a good friend but I haven't heard from them in forever now. I don't know why I bothered.


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## Buddy900 (Apr 9, 2012)

In some places I've been to or worked at, there have been quite a few occasions where I try to say something constructive, but the people listening seem to be extremely uninterested.


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## Socialanxiety11 (Oct 3, 2011)

Everybody i know hates me, it sucks so bad.


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## zoslow (Jun 2, 2014)

Socialanxiety11 said:


> Everybody i know hates me, it sucks so bad.


Why would they hate you?


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## Orchestrated (Apr 27, 2012)

Funnily enough, some people are citing how polite and nice and friendly they are to people and all of that can actually be interpreted as "people pleasing" behavior. Which can in turn be interpreted as insecurity, deceitfulness, and/or lack of a personality. Or so my perusing the internet has taught me, don't quote me.

Idgaf though. I'm almost painfully polite until you give me a reason not to be and that's because I generally don't seek anything more than surface interactions. 

So yea, I'm pretty unlikable.


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## harletta (Nov 4, 2012)

I don't even know if I'm disliked since whenever I say anything to anyone (which is rare) I get completely ignored.


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## IllmaticJJ (Dec 29, 2013)

JupiterStarr said:


> It seems that no matter how friendly and polite I am towards others no one likes me. I'm a very forgettable person. Does anyone else have this problem?


I think most of us struggle with this alot. The problem is that being friendly and/or polite in and of itself isn't enough. You have to offer much more than that. Lots of people have busy social lives and arent going to be friends with you just because you're nice or friendly. 
Basically no social skills=no social life even if you're nice, have money, have a nice car, etc.


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## londonguy202 (Jan 10, 2014)

Socialanxiety11 said:


> Everybody i know hates me, it sucks so bad.


Why do people hate you, I am sure that you are such a good, nice and amazing person. Wish all the luck in life and college


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## Agwananadindwa (Dec 18, 2014)

*this is Samsara*

In some places, our suffering may be seen as a current manifestation of past actions and thoughts. What we have thought and done has led us to become who we are. So my first response is to take responsibility for yourself, and be the change that you want to see in the world. Other people will only ever tell you how to be more the way they think people should be, and if they don't, it is because they don't know what they think.

Secondly, you are alive. Life is a mysterious thing, but right now, on this planet, our species' population has exploded. There isn't enough room for the majority of us anymore. Remember, that this is an incredibly unique period in the history of the world, and you are here to witness it. Life is a mysterious thing, in the end it is what you make of it.

Through my ages, which are few, I have learned that gaining appreciation for this Great Mystery, this unexplainable thing we call 'phenomena' brings me closer to the truth. I have learned to listen to the Earth, and I am free.


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## SarahRea (Dec 3, 2014)

I think the answer, the one that has worked for me, is to not take it personally. People have lives and can get wrapped up in them. Talk to people when you feel like talking, and if someone ignores you, move on to the next person. Someone will eventually keep responding and then you know who really cares.


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## Taliban2015 (Jan 14, 2015)

Even tho I got family I always felt alone. I always feel like I am in the way or the odd one the alien out of this world lol. No matter how nice I am to people they don't notice it but if I snap I will have the whole police van coming to get me because I am so aggressive lol. People just push your limits and when you have a family who never support you or stick up for you even tho I don't need it but still. I feel depressed and like I want to vanish. I am a mummy my self and I can see it's effecting my child too. I feel so sad that this poor angel has to put up with an ugly person like me. I hate myself! :-(


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

I feel that way too. But I realize that it's often because I'm trying to make friends with incompatible people. 

If you're a bookworm type trying to make friends with a bunch of jocks then they probably won't like you no matter how nice or friendly you are. It doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you. You just have to find people you click with. And when you find people you click with, you'll find that there is no hard work involved in getting them to like you.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

I know what you mean, but try to stay positive for your kid. Don't hate yourself I'm pretty sure you're a wonderful person. Its not your fault, most people don't understand SA.


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## Taliban2015 (Jan 14, 2015)

Thanks for you messages and support I really appreciate it. 
Is there any good medicine out there but I don't want to be relaying on it. I don't need something that would make me like zombie and if I don't take it I will become worse. I have seen people and know 
people that take this medicine antidepressents that controls them and made them put on weight. If there is any good medicine then please let me know and how it effected you, thank you.


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## pmsmom (Nov 3, 2015)

*feel the same way*

I feel like no one likes me either. I always have to reach out to others. If I don't, no one would reach out to me. I am the one who has to text others first, or initiate lunch, etc. I feel lonely. I have a husband and two children, but I need friends too.


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## JohnDoe26 (Jun 6, 2012)

I can relate. I honestly think that no one genuinely likes me, even my family (although they do love me).

I'm in the mental process of not caring and genuinely trying to be self-less and loving towards everyone, regardless.


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## B22flyer (May 8, 2017)

Same ? I'm super awkward all the time and I have freinds but no one likes me, all my freinds are getting girl freinds and I just can't get any confidence to walk up to girls or anything, I don't think that I'm attractive and I think that girls just don't like me, all my freinds say just to wait a little and I'll get a girl but I have lost hope, no one likes me. I have depression almost everyday because I feel that no one likes me and no one cares about me, I seriously think that if I left and never came back no one would question where I was, they wouldn't notice that im gone. I have social anxiety because I just can't deal with social situations, I do sometimes have small bursts of confidence but it's slowly fades away after I look in the mirror and I get thoughts that no one wants me. Everyone of my freinds is always confident and they always think that girls like them. I don't know what to do. I'm out of high school already, I have an amazing job that pays really well, I drive a nice car but girls just don't like me. I don't know what to do, I've lost all hope that I'll find someone that likes me and that is attracted to me. Hopefully I'm not alone in this


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