# I want love, not friends (not what you think).



## Lyric Suite (Mar 16, 2006)

Simply put, is anybody tired of friendship?

I know, it sounds crazy, but even though i'm a recluse and i have virtually no friends to begin with, i'm completely not interested in making any, male friends that is. At this point, i just want a girl, and that's that. You know, _for a change_.

Heck, i used to be on good terms with my room-mate and i sort of cherished the company, but lately i begun to ignore him more and more and it's like we don't even live in the same house. I tell myself i'm going to regret that i'm rejecting his company, but i just couldn't care less.

There's nothing we haven't talked about that hasn't been discussed countless times before. There's nothing we can do togheter that i haven't done with him or other friends in the past a trillion times.

I think i'm getting desperate. I had only one girlfriend experience in my life, and even though it only lasted two weeks (and that was 4 years ago), it just made my craving for female companionship even bigger, and it's getting HUGE as time goes by.

I just can't think of anything else, every single day. It's driving me absolutly crazy, to the point where 'going out' for me only matters if there's females at the end of the line...


----------



## Drella (Dec 4, 2004)

I can't remember what it's like to actually have friends, so I'd take either/or.


----------



## Lyric Suite (Mar 16, 2006)

Drella's_Rock_Follies said:


> I can't remember what it's like to actually have friends, so I'd take either/or.


You only care about things when you don't have them, that's a given.

That said, i'm still sick of friends. I can tell myself all sorts of things, but my brain won't have it...


----------



## weatherman (Apr 19, 2006)

I have no interest in making friends anymore. I want a girlfriend. I have had friends in the past and they have all turned out to be a-holes. I'm sick of it.


----------



## ShesKrayZ (May 9, 2006)

*The SAS guys*

:hug 
I know, guys. Sometimes I just want to be somebody's girlfriend.
SA sucks. Love you guys.

:group


----------



## VelvetElvis (Apr 29, 2006)

Lyric Suite said:


> At this point, i just want a girl, and that's that. You know, _for a change_.


Yeah-it would be an interesting experience, as I've always been the one who never goes out with anyone.


----------



## Catarina (May 3, 2006)

*Re: The SAS guys*



ShesKrayZ said:


> :hug
> Sometimes I just want to be somebody's girlfriend


aw now that's a lovely quote.

and i know what you mean.


----------



## ColdFury (Nov 6, 2003)

I understand. Love is something better than friendship. Many people have friends, but its special when a person feels love for you.


----------



## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

I would just like friends. That'd be fine.


----------



## Melatonin (Feb 8, 2005)

I've had the same mentality for years but after finally getting a girlfriend, I discovered that a girl will not magically solve your problems. I became attached to this girl from the get-go (like lichen on rock) because I had nobody else. When she was with me, I was ecstatic; but when alone, I was still utterly miserable. I wanted to spend every waking hour with her. I placed her on a pedestal and worshipped her. After several months, she got fed up and left me because I was smothering her. I was devastated. And because I had no friends around for support, I fell into a deep depression which took years to recover. The important lesson I learned was you need a good balance between friendship and romance. Don't put all your eggs in one basket because if that basket gets taken away, it will wreck you. Diversify your relationship portfolio.


----------



## cakesniffer (Nov 11, 2003)

I can't even make friends, so I don't have hope for things higher than that. It'd just be nice to have somebody, anybody, to spend time with.


----------



## Carbon Breather (Mar 13, 2005)

I understand. I have friends and all of them have or had girlfriends and they talk about it pretty often. It makes me wanna have one too but i have never met someone that i really liked and i don't meet many new people so i don't see how it would change.



If i didn't see articles about relationships in papers and people wouldn't talk so much about it i wouldn't care but i'm reminded every day and i wonder what i've missed and are missing.


----------



## VelvetElvis (Apr 29, 2006)

Carbon Breather said:


> If i didn't see articles about relationships in papers and people wouldn't talk so much about it i wouldn't care but i'm reminded every day and i wonder what i've missed and are missing.


Definately. People reeeally love to rub it in.


----------



## anonymousnewbie (Nov 21, 2005)

Carbon Breather said:


> I understand. I have friends and all of them have or had girlfriends and they talk about it pretty often. It makes me wanna have one too but i have never met someone that i really liked and i don't meet many new people so i don't see how it would change.
> 
> If i didn't see articles about relationships in papers and people wouldn't talk so much about it i wouldn't care but i'm reminded every day and i wonder what i've missed and are missing.


Totally feel ya.


----------



## Andre (Feb 27, 2004)

Melatonin said:


> I've had the same mentality for years but after finally getting a girlfriend, I discovered that a girl will not magically solve your problems. I became attached to this girl from the get-go (like lichen on rock) because I had nobody else. When she was with me, I was ecstatic; but when alone, I was still utterly miserable. I wanted to spend every waking hour with her. I placed her on a pedestal and worshipped her. After several months, she got fed up and left me because I was smothering her. I was devastated. And because I had no friends around for support, I fell into a deep depression which took years to recover. The important lesson I learned was you need a good balance between friendship and romance. Don't put all your eggs in one basket because if that basket gets taken away, it will wreck you. Diversify your relationship portfolio.


I had the same exact thing happen to me. Luckily, the girl I'm with now doesn't mind spending (almost) all of her time with me.

It's easier for me to find a girlfriend than a friend. I think it's because I'm at a point in my life where most people around me already have a solid group of friends to rely on, but there are always people looking for romance. That's my guess, anyway.


----------



## Melusine (Jun 19, 2004)

I want a boyfriend who can be my friend and do things together and have similiar things we like to do. Though i wouldn't mind having a girl-friend to do stuff with either, it's just that most girls i don't usually 'click' with and i'd rather be alone, it's hard to feel comfortable around other girl's.


----------



## MidNight (May 2, 2004)

At this point in my life, I kinda want a girlfriend, but at the same time I really don't. I've been involved with a couple of girls in the last 6 months, but it always ends on a bad note. I always tell them that I've got a major social disorder, and they dont take it to heart until later, right about the time I start getting attached, then I find myself lonely again. I have yet to find a woman who is fully willing to accept this crazy silence...

As for friends, well, I'm getting somewhat better at that. I can name more people I actually talk to now than I've known in years. But, at the same time I've come to realize somehting: I guess I'm not really the type of person that people can handle hanging out with on a daily basis...


----------



## scairy (Sep 18, 2005)

Melusine said:


> I want a boyfriend who can be my friend and do things together and have similiar things we like to do. Though i wouldn't mind having a girl-friend to do stuff with either, it's just that most girls i don't usually 'click' with and i'd rather be alone, it's hard to feel comfortable around other girl's.


In my opinion if you're looking for a long term relationship then you're on the right track. You can't just be intimate you have to be very close friends. Strange because don't women tend to find friends as not the right type for an intimate relationship? I think like you do in this regard though.


----------



## long_way_home (May 10, 2006)

I'd like some friends (although I do have one good friend) but I really prefer to have a boyfriend. I've never really had a boyfriend before and it's about time that I got one. I would rather spend more time on looking for a boyfriend than for someone who can just be my friend.


----------



## Equisgurl (Nov 22, 2004)

I think I'd be a lot happier with few friends, but I find myself longing for closeness of a relationship especially when I see couples together, I get really envious.


----------



## heckyll (Mar 27, 2006)

I am not really interested in friendships, as I am usually very underwhelmed by them - they seem so trivial when I have had them.


----------



## silentbutdeadly (May 28, 2005)

i only have 2 friends at the moment but it doesnt really bother me at all. i really want a girlfreind though. the thing is i probably need to get a circle of freinds to hang out with before i can get a girlfreind.


----------



## GaryUranga (Apr 22, 2006)

you need to learn to get girl to be atarcted to you so you don fall into friend category, friends are underrated, you have no idea how much friends help


----------



## Chopkinsca (Jun 16, 2006)

Having someone to hold would be nice. I don't know if I can stand friends anymore, too many complications over the years. Then again, I'm currently not exactly strong enough to be in a relationship with a girl either.

Well, I guess I have myself. The best part about being friends with yourself is that you are never alone. :hide


----------



## BeNice (Jan 2, 2004)

I would still hang out with my friends if I had a girlfriend, but it gets really old hanging out with two, three different friends that have their g/f by their side. I try to brighten myself up, stay positive, but I come home from that I fall asleep wishing I wasn't so lonely. I believe it's nature. We are supposed to receive hugs and affection on a somewhat regular basis. Some people have more of a need for it and some maybe not at all. I just need the affection and closeness, I believe.

ilikemyself wrote:



> It's easier for me to find a girlfriend than a friend. I think it's because I'm at a point in my life where most people around me already have a solid group of friends to rely on, but there are always people looking for romance. That's my guess, anyway.


You probably have the kind of group of friends where you have more potential for meeting girls. My friends.. the kind of girls that come around don't want much to do with me, even if they may be looking for romance. I really am a loser and I'm not doing anything with my life. I assume you have more going for you, even if you are shy. I'd think Megan would agree with that too.. I stayed with her for two weeks. She has seen why I don't have a girlfriend.


----------



## instil (Aug 19, 2005)

BeNice said:


> You probably have the kind of group of friends where you have more potential for meeting girls. My friends.. the kind of girls that come around don't want much to do with me, even if they may be looking for romance. I really am a loser and I'm not doing anything with my life. I assume you have more going for you, even if you are shy. I'd think Megan would agree with that too.. I stayed with her for two weeks. She has seen why I don't have a girlfriend.


man, lighten up on yourself,first of all. i feel how you feel about friends g/f's being around...it makes you want that too, the more you see it. (the relationship,companionship,etc)

When you say, 'the kind of girls that come around'...what do you mean?


----------



## BeNice (Jan 2, 2004)

They are age 16-19, more outgoing, have different taste in things than I do, live a different lifestyle in general, already know plenty of guys in their circle of friends, which is not uncommon for them to talk about, that they have to choose from. 

I know I can sound really negative on this board, and I'll admit I can be. I consider myself more of a realist, though. I'm in touch with what's around me. I've mentioned on this board the two girls that walk by my house together and the one that looked back. Well, I haven't seen them in about a week, but I'm still trying. So, I'm not completely pessimistic. I think I just know myself well enough to understand why I'm 23 and still the same. Loser is a stupid term, but it still is the way people can view one another. When you're 23, live at home, barely work like me, socially awkward, I wouldn't say you're a loser, but it makes it harder to come across as a potential partner to the opposite sex. For instance, there is this one girl I am not crazy over but I think she's cute. Too young for me, anyway, but my friend Rachelle mentioned to me that this girl said "he's really quiet, has really nice eyes, and you can tell a lot about him by his facial expressions", or something along those lines. I know for fact she isn't into me, but it just lets me know how I am seen by others, as in I'm expected to have to present myself more than I do. That is the hardest part for me... just knowing that I don't have the things a lot of girls want. The other part that sucks is I go to hang out with people but get bored of it so fast, and often depressed. I'd rather be home listening to old music and tending to my plants, and after a while of being home I want to be with others. I get bored and desire the company of others, and I also go to hang out for the possibility that I might meet someone, but I get lonely around them after a couple of hours. I start to think about what I'm talking about in this post... what's wrong with me, why I'm still alone, what it's going to be like in 5 years. Sometimes I want a mason jar full of painkillers, or maybe I should get on medications.


----------



## jerseylemon (May 24, 2006)

It's hard for me to date. I'm so afraid of what the guy will think when he realizes I never hang out with anyone. Just yesterday I went on a date and the guy was joking around asking me if I had any single friends for a guy he knows. I just thought to myself "I don't really have ANY friends, let alone single ones." Then I spent the next hour thinking, "I need to stop seeing this guy before he realizes I have no friends and I get that dreaded look that says "what's wrong with you?""

It's a viscous cycle....I want to date but would rather have some friends that are girls first. I miss having someone to gossip to about the date. Unfortunately, my friend making skills suck. I just don't seem to get along well with women.


----------



## BeNice (Jan 2, 2004)

I don't know if I'd want any girl I date to meet my friends. Let's see... any ladies here, what do you think? Walk into my friend's place, there is a hookah going, at least one person smoking a cigarette, at least 3 other people hanging out altogether, beer, a bowl being passed around at some point, someone ordering Domino's possibly, two people playing guitars but not together and often music playing at the same time, and the guitars are not in sync with the music being played. What do you think about that?


----------



## instil (Aug 19, 2005)

BeNice said:


> I don't know if I'd want any girl I date to meet my friends. Let's see... any ladies here, what do you think? Walk into my friend's place, there is a hookah going, at least one person smoking a cigarette, at least 3 other people hanging out altogether, beer, a bowl being passed around at some point, someone ordering Domino's possibly, two people playing guitars but not together and often music playing at the same time, and the guitars are not in sync with the music being played. What do you think about that?


sounds like a bunch of guys in their early twenties. i admit, i wouldnt want to bring a g/f around to witness that display either, but i think a lot of us guys have friends like that.

also, i do the same thing with not wanting the new gf to find out too much about me, like the fact i really never go out, and have 2 friends.


----------



## Madmonkeypoo (May 3, 2004)

*Re: The SAS guys*



ShesKrayZ said:


> :hug
> I know, guys. Sometimes I just want to be somebody's girlfriend.


 :ditto


----------

