# Positive things about having SA



## singingherbs (Nov 23, 2010)

I decided to do appreciation affirmations (like what do I appreciate in my life etc.)
Then I thought of doing positive SA affirmations. SA is always labeled as a bad thing right? I know it may be hard but it will give you a break to try seeing SA as positive. I know far-fetched right? But this is what I came up with. If anyone else can come up with anything, please share!

There is evidence of everlasting support from those around me
You are fortunate to have a patient and caring family 
You are finally healing and making progress everyday
You are able to demonstrate your strength everyday
I accept myself in this current situation


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## LucasM (Dec 2, 2010)

Nope. Nothing positive about SA. Only positives come from getting rid of this f*cking curse.


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## travis bickle (Dec 16, 2010)

My positives are that it has given me a sense of independence that I don't think I'd have as much otherwise and it does make me realise my strength and ability to endure


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## ozkr (Dec 2, 2005)

singingherbs said:


> There is evidence of everlasting support from those around me
> You are fortunate to have a patient and caring family
> You are finally healing and making progress everyday
> You are able to demonstrate your strength everyday
> I accept myself in this current situation


What you're seeing is not the positive things SA has given you but the things SA hasn't taken away. I have SA but I can definitely not relate to anything you've mentioned.


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## josh23 (Nov 26, 2010)

I fully believe anyone can recover from it. I also believe that once you do, you will appreciate moments and what you have so much more than the average person. It is hell to deal with. But with a huge effort to get over it, you can really, really enjoy life, more than your typical person thats for sure.


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## goldendaze (Dec 26, 2010)

i think the ability to pay attention to life's little eccentricities is a positive. because youre alone for so long and prefer to be alone, you pick up on the nuances that others pass by. it leaves a lot of time for thinking. 
i think my heightened sense of emotion (aka paranoia in its ugly form) can also be used to see beauty in things that others might not.

although i despise SA with every ounce of my being, and as silly as it may sound, some of my favorite memories involve just being with myself..


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## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

Introspection and self awareness.

This site and the people associated.


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## DarkHeartKid (Dec 29, 2010)

sa calms down greatly my otherwise pretty whacky weirdo me @[email protected] if only it itself wouldnt be so out of control -_-


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## Ambivert (Jan 16, 2010)

LucasM said:


> Nope. Nothing positive about SA. Only positives come from getting rid of this f*cking curse.


Gonna have to second this. I don't see anything positive about this disease. Extroverts can be introspective too...along with partying/socializing (best of both worlds)


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## theEscapist (Oct 13, 2010)

JimmyDeansRetartedCousin said:


> Introspection and self awareness.


...but of course, that is also the curse of social anxiety....


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## Elusive Apathy (Dec 29, 2010)

Truthfully I don't think it's a good thing to create a list of positives. It'll only help one to justify and prolong their social anxiety.

Buuut....I don't think I'd be as knowledgeable because I wouldn't have had so much spare time alone to learn and read. Even then, though, I often get distracted from my studies by depression resulting from SA. See?


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Elusive Apathy said:


> Truthfully I don't think it's a good thing to create a list of positives. It'll only help one to justify and prolong their social anxiety.
> 
> Buuut....I don't think I'd be as knowledgeable because I wouldn't have had so much spare time alone to learn and read. Even then, though, I often get distracted from my studies by depression resulting from SA. See?


SA is not a choice, it stems from negative thinking . If we can think positively about where we are in our lives, were one step closer to overcoming it.

Once I am off the road of SA, I will be better equipped than if I never had it.


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## Catch22 (Jan 1, 2011)

some positive things about SA....

Makes you stronger being alone, alot of people would never make it this long being so lonely, but we have lived and survived it, and since we're used to it, we are able to endure what alot of people wouldnt be able to, it does make us stronger

It has allowed me to think alot more deeply about things in this world, more than most people do. I can feel more sympathy for others.


There needs to be a challenge, to be a success. I cant wait for the day when i look back, and realize through all the pain and the lonliness, i not only survived, but i became stronger and happier and more thankful than i could ever be, and thats what makes life worth living.:yes










love this quote: "Your opinion of me, is none of my business"


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## MattFoley (Dec 5, 2009)

cassie88 said:


> some positive things about SA....
> 
> Makes you stronger being alone, alot of people would never make it this long being so lonely, but we have lived and survived it, and since we're used to it, we are able to endure what alot of people wouldnt be able to, it does make us stronger
> 
> ...


Ah I came to this thread wanting to write something exactly like this but now I don't have to  Really, the amount of hardship that we have to endure in our lifetimes makes us into extremely resilient people. Just knowing my own personal strength and will to overcome it all is amazing. And that resolve makes the future seem brighter because I know if I choose to, I can overcome anything. To me that's what makes life worth living too.


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## singingherbs (Nov 23, 2010)

Catch22 said:


> some positive things about SA....
> 
> Makes you stronger being alone, alot of people would never make it this long being so lonely, but we have lived and survived it, and since we're used to it, we are able to endure what alot of people wouldnt be able to, it does make us stronger
> 
> ...


wow, this is the most positive thing I've read about SA, i had the warmest, fuzziest feeling after reading this. Thanks


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## harlow22 (Jun 21, 2008)

I think SA gives you the time to be much more introspective about life and to express yourself in creative ways that you wouldn't be able to if you were around a lot of people.


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## SociallyBroken (Oct 3, 2010)

I don't have aids from sleeping with a bunch of guys because I am in the house 24/7 and can't even keep a date.


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## ThisGuy (Jul 13, 2010)

Catch22 said:


> some positive things about SA....
> 
> Makes you stronger being alone, alot of people would never make it this long being so lonely, but we have lived and survived it, and since we're used to it, we are able to endure what alot of people wouldnt be able to, it does make us stronger
> 
> ...


Love the quote as well as everything else you mention.  I completely agree. This forum is full of awesome people.


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## fredbloggs02 (Dec 14, 2009)

It's given me a lot of time spent alone, I've not used it frugally. Every day I've been perfecting skills I'd practised in the outside world, some related, some unreated to my social anxiety disorder. These will take me into the real world to give me a head start on other people in the same way their vacuous faecetiousness with which they once stood above me. Should every sense of what to expect from the world elude me again as it did once I'll know how to treat myself fairly, to focus my mind, to discipline my days, to stay in the moment and focus in the moment it seems to slip away, possibly to explore the truth of it better. I'll know how to heal myself, to speed up when my mind won't stood and slow down when it will. To build a bridge on the river Quai was my way for a long time but not anymore.


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## Dub16 (Feb 28, 2010)

Everythin. Its a hoot. I'd be lost withoot it like


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## Flame Sixtyone (Aug 27, 2009)

Reduced life expectancy


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## Swanson (Sep 4, 2010)

Catch22 said:


> some positive things about SA....
> 
> *Makes you stronger being alone, alot of people would never make it this long being so lonely, but we have lived and survived it, and since we're used to it, we are able to endure what alot of people wouldnt be able to, it does make us stronger
> *
> ...


I'll second the bolded. When I hear stories of people spending a small amount of time alone and getting a little crazy, all I can do is think *boo hoo, this is practically my whole life* If those people became as isolated as I have been in my life, they would probably kill themselves


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## rainbowOne (Sep 26, 2010)

Is it really good to think of POSITIVES about SA? surely that doesn't help us beat it? I like to think bad things about it cos that makes me want to kick its *behind*


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## Mae West (Sep 15, 2005)

In a weird way growing up with SA gave me more confidence than the average person. If I had grown up always caring about what others think, trying to impress people, and always doing the "right" thing socially, I would have become more of a common person. It's not that I don't get along with others or that I am trying to challenge them. It's just that I don't look to their approval about everything and I don't feel pressure to go along with the crowd as much as the average person. This of course could just be "me" and have nothing to do with SA ; )


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## udontknowme (Jan 2, 2011)

A cheaper phone bill


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## Mandyy (Jan 3, 2011)

singingherbs said:


> There is evidence of everlasting support from those around me
> You are fortunate to have a patient and caring family


HA that doesn't apply to me at all. ^
My family is so far from patient. And no matter how many times I try to explain to them my feelings, they just tell me to suck it up or something. They obviously don't understand SA.


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## Mae West (Sep 15, 2005)

rainbowOne said:


> Is it really good to think of POSITIVES about SA? surely that doesn't help us beat it? I like to think bad things about it cos that makes me want to kick its *behind*


It's more like "what have you learned from SA? or How has SA made you are stronger person?" I don't see SA as a positive thing, but there are lessons to be learned from every situation. Sometimes going through a difficult thing like SA can make you a stronger and more appreciative person.


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## MBL (Oct 5, 2010)

SA being positive? WTF 

I have to disagree.


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## Yella (Sep 27, 2010)

becks said:


> Ah I came to this thread wanting to write something exactly like this but now I don't have to  Really, the amount of hardship that we have to endure in our lifetimes makes us into extremely resilient people. Just knowing my own personal strength and will to overcome it all is amazing. And that resolve makes the future seem brighter because I know if I choose to, I can overcome anything. To me that's what makes life worth living too.


Very well said, cause I couldn't come up with one positive thing about having SA. I think you have changed my view of it now after reading your post. Thank you for that.


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## singingherbs (Nov 23, 2010)

I just thought of one.
When I was at University last year (first year) there was this one guy that would knock on my door almost daily he even made sure he said goodbye to me when I left. I always kept my distance from him (kept him in acquaintance mode) but he didn't mind, he just kept coming around, I was amazed. This showed me that some people in this world don't care that you have SA and can see you for who you really are (I think that might have been why I was scared of getting closer) 
A positive thing about having SA is you get to know the really strong willed, patient and caring people. Thank God for those people.


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## TooShyToScream (Jan 23, 2011)

For me, the positives of it are:

1. I don't get involved with any people who could hurt me or be a bad influence on me because I'm too shy to talk to them.

2. Like someone else said, introspection and self-awareness.


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## DreamyDove (Dec 8, 2009)

I has made me sweet and empathetic.... 

And it makes me refreshingly different from alot of other people who don't have the problem. Guys like it and find the shyness cute


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## poppet (Feb 7, 2008)

Singingherbs, your post just reduced me to tears. 
I just thought of all the people I have met through my life and realised just how special the ones that stuck around actually are. I never really thought about just how persistant and loyal they must have had to be to get to know me. Even despite my best efforts to avoid them or push them away. 

It just hit me like lightening bolt how lucky I am, that even after putting my friends family and husband through hell over the years while I was battling SAD, they are still here... I feel really and truely humbled and blessed now. People can be so kind without even realising how much they are actually helping, it takes your breath away!

Even the people that I thought were "victimising" me have helped me to become stronger and accept myself more because it meant I was forced to confront my self image and rebuild it in a more realistic, robust way...

Really what is there to be anxious about? I think it should be renamed SELF anxiety, because thats where the fear lies and ultimately where the power to heal comes from.


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## equiiaddict (Jun 27, 2006)

-Makes you a stronger person, having to deal with being alone more than other people, etc.
-Gives you a sense of independence...you know you don't NEED people around all the time to have a good time or whatever. (Cause we all know that one person who is incapable of doing anything without somebody else around to "entertain" them.)
-And let's face it...people with SA don't have to worry about being that obnoxious person that never shuts up! (Those people annoy me so much.)


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## kiirby (Oct 8, 2010)

It's given me the time and focus I need to start up my knitted hats for dogs business.


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## sherbert (Jun 24, 2005)

rainbowOne said:


> Is it really good to think of POSITIVES about SA? surely that doesn't help us beat it? I like to think bad things about it cos that makes me want to kick its *behind*


I don't think so. You naturally know most of the negatives. I think if you see some of your struggles as resulting in positives, then you're going to be less depressed about it. It also has the interesting result of looking at your positive traits, which is a good thing.

I hope the goal of most people on here is to rid themselves of their intense anxiety and fear.

I think having SA has resulted in a decent vocabulary. I often think deeply about issues too.


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## sberkley (Jan 28, 2010)

Having SA isnt always a negative , depends on what you want in your life .
I have a job that doesnt require me to be social and that is perfect for me . I dont really miss a social life since it really isnt important to me . 
I am luck in that I rarely need to face my SA because I have created a life of just family and very few friends and my art .. I am happy with what I have in my life ..


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## RichardWood (Jan 26, 2011)

more time,more peace,more freedom


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## robtyl (Sep 2, 2010)

*There's nothing positive about SA - SA is a DISORDER.*

Would you ask a blind person what it is about their disability that is so positive? And even if they could fathom some contrived positive - would it _matter_?

_Who cares if being blind gives you super-sensitive hearing? You're BLIND. There is so much in life that you unfortunately miss out on. If there was a cure for blindness, would you then refuse it, because of all the 'positives' you enjoy?_

Ask any 'normal' person: "How would you like to live with a disorder?"

What would their response be? "Disorder? Hmm... Well OK - as long as it's the fun kind!"

Give me a break. If SA has anything positive about it, there wouldn't be people on this forum trying to get rid of it. But therein lies the rub. Perhaps there are people on here who don't want to/can't be bothered getting rid of it - in which case, living a life alone/lonely/scared/restrained/isolated/anxiety-ridden/unfulfilled/outcast, etc. must be great; or perhaps they're just telling themselves that.

The fortunate difference for those with disorders compared to those with disabilities, is that disorders can be _overcome_. I sympathise for those truly unable to improve their condition. I have no sympathy for those on here with nothing better to do than gloat about their misery - as if others are envious of them (which, surprisingly, I am realising is in fact entirely possible).

Why even bother posting a thread like this? Either revel in your condition and post in the Frustration subforum (the place for glorifying life in a sh!tty situation that _(almost)_ no one else would want to be in) - or post in the Positive Thinking subforum, where brave souls realise that without effort, things will forever be the same, and that even tentative and inconclusive steps are better than none at all.

And no; this thread has nothing to do with thinking positively. By analogy, a member of a forum for people suffering from bulimia would hardly be likely to post a thread asking for people to opine about the positive outcomes of _suffering_ (let's not forget people are not _blessed_ with disorders (as in the case of good looks), but, rather, _suffer_ from them) from bulimia. Can you imagine such a thing? _"What's so positive about bulimia? Well, I guess forcing myself to vomit all the time means I don't have to sh!t as much!"_

This thread is just as ridiculous.

Make a choice.

x


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## sociallyretarded (Aug 3, 2010)

I agree with everything robtyl just wrote.


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## Haydsmom2007 (Oct 16, 2009)

I wish I wasn't so anxious and nervous all the time, but I do like the fact that I'm introverted and reserved and a homebody which I think stems from having social anxiety. I think a major positive of that is that I'm not a party-girl and I don't like having people around me all the time. I like spending quality time with someone. I personally just like the fact that I'm quiet and don't blab all the time.


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## Haydsmom2007 (Oct 16, 2009)

robtyl said:


> *There's nothing positive about SA - SA is a DISORDER.*
> 
> Would you ask a blind person what it is about their disability that is so positive? And even if they could fathom some contrived positive - would it _matter_?
> 
> ...


Accepting myself for being the way I am and realizing I am not alone and there are lots of people out there like me has helped tremendously. It's helped me realize what there is to overcome and what there is about me that's just the way I am and will always be. It's helped me to love myself and my personality despite my _disorder_. And I have gotten much much better since I joined this site and started focusing on the positives. Rather than the "oh my life sucks. I am such a freak. No one likes me. I will always be this way. Waaaah"


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## InfiniteBlaze (Jan 27, 2011)

Stops me from showing my true colors, which got me hated for most of my elementary school years.


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## greamelexon (Jan 31, 2011)

I firmly believe anyone can recover. I also think that when you do, you will enjoy the moments, and what you have so much more than average. It's hell to be treated. But with a huge effort to get out, you really, really enjoy life more than your typical person thats for you.


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## dashneo (Feb 2, 2011)

one good thing for me is that I don't get distracted by friends in class....I get all my homework done in school!


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## Dying note (Mar 17, 2009)

JimmyDeansRetartedCousin said:


> Introspection and self awareness.


^^This all the way.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

It has certainly made me more compassionate and understanding a person I think, and it has helped me to understand people who are really down and out a lot more than if I did not have issues of my own which made me feel the same way.

The negative still far outweight though :b


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## singingherbs (Nov 23, 2010)

robtyl said:


> *There's nothing positive about SA - SA is a DISORDER.*
> 
> Would you ask a blind person what it is about their disability that is so positive? And even if they could fathom some contrived positive - would it _matter_?
> 
> ...


hey robtyl, the point of posting positive things about SA is that it's a tool for accepting the disorder which is the first step in ultimately overcoming it. I've personally felt that positive thinking trumps negative every single time. It just takes practice to choose negative over positive but once you do, you will feel how much more momentum and power positivity holds. That's not to say that negativity won't creep in every once in a while. But positivity is a valuable tool in combating or more like working with this disorder. 
If you say it's hell, ya it's going to be hell.

I used to be in a constant cycle of negativity, putting myself down for having this disorder, just the fact that it's called a disorder is adding to the way we view ourselves. Imagine if it was called social anxiety Advantage. Do you see how powerful words are? Obviously social anxiety is not advantageous in this present society where mental illness and dysfunction is the norm. 
You do realize that we are a result of society, we are not this disorder, it's a proven fact that mental illness is caused by society with some genetic factors added in.

Don't let society get you down, we are the psychological warriors of life!


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## kcart88 (Feb 6, 2011)

need2bnormal said:


> I don't have aids from sleeping with a bunch of guys because I am in the house 24/7 and can't even keep a date.


This made me smile. So true, guaranteed no STIs, that's one positive. I agree it is really hard to find anything positive about SA but here's what I've come up with:
- SA makes you much more understanding and less judgemental of others because you have had a lot to deal with yourself and you understand people who are awkward, shy, quiet, etc.
- makes you a kinder person. After going through a lot of hurt I would never want to hurt others


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## kcart88 (Feb 6, 2011)

just to clarify I meant it made me smile because I also couldn't contract an STI due to SA. Wasn't making fun.


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## WTFnooooo (Mar 27, 2010)

Time to know oneself. Introspection and self-awareness, like someone else said.
Thinking carefully before acting, to not be embarrassed in public, although the opposite can happen by going into a panic attack...


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## neilblue17 (Feb 6, 2011)

It puts me in the league of Abraham Lincoln , Sir Issac Newton and makes me feel that I am different, I am special. It reminds me every time that my weakness can be my strength!! It makes me feel proud that I lived a life full of daunting challenges and I tried my best to overcome every one of those challenges rather than giving up on myself!


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## softshock11 (Jan 9, 2011)

nothing positive

forced to only stick to myself, getting sick of your own subconscious, not trusting anyone, feeling left out of things you know you deserve to be a part of

its a sinking feeling


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## shynesshellasucks (May 10, 2008)

I don't see any positives in SA. Looking for positives in SA would be like a guy in a wheelchair saying "hey at least I won't trip and fall".


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## omium (Aug 6, 2009)

Safeguarded me from negative influences. Introspection led me to know myself better, and am now on the path to freedom.


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## ryobi (Jan 13, 2009)

empathy for others...

Independant thinking...


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## trendyfool (Apr 11, 2010)

OKAY. well my suffering gives me lots and lots of material to work with for my poetry, I wouldn't be able to write the cool poems I write if I didn't go through a lot of struggles. My SA helps me reach other people who are suffering and try to help them get to a healthy place. I'm more understanding and open as a result of been in some very low places; I don't really judge, and that's something I'm so proud of. My SA has shown me how strong I am and how strong every person in the world has the capacity to be. Going to the hospital showed me so much beauty and how amazing every single person is. I'm now thankful for what I have, which many people SA or not, are not. And I know I'm not my SA and not doomed to always "have it" but I like seeing the positives in my life experience, and I'm not afraid to say that having SA has helped me grow as a person.


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## Jessie203 (Feb 20, 2008)

Made me a better student.


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## That guy over there (Jan 18, 2011)

I suppose its made me more kind


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

I believe that SA has made me a much more compassionate person. More specifically, more compassionate towards people with mental health issues. As a result of my sufferings, I'm determined to become a therapist to help others with similar issues, no matter how small. Because I understand the level of torture something so seemingly insignificant can cause. Never underestimate the power of anxiety disorders.


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## Blujay13 (Nov 24, 2010)

One thing positive is that since it's hard for me to make eye contact or if I'm just nervous about something I notice little things where ever I am. Like if I'm in a room I'll notice something little like a scratch on the wall. Analyze things perfectly to get my mind off anxiety. I think thats a positive thing because I'm noticing the little seemingly meaningless things in life I guess.


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## flawed (Feb 15, 2011)

need2bnormal said:


> I don't have aids from sleeping with a bunch of guys because I am in the house 24/7 and can't even keep a date.


:haha Ditto


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

I'm too scared to dance in front of anyone, so I'll never trip while doing a fancy twirl and crack my head open. That's tempting now though.


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## robtyl (Sep 2, 2010)

layitontheline said:


> I'm too scared to dance in front of anyone, so I'll never trip while doing a fancy twirl and crack my head open. That's tempting now though.


What a fantastic outlook on life. I suppose, going by your logic, it would be better to be a paraplegic than able-bodied, since in that case you would also never have the chance to trip and crack your head open? Or better yet - better dead than alive, since that would prevent you from suffering pain, or heartbreak?

Don't make excuses.

x


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

You're not familiar with sarcasm, are you.

And don't patronize me with that excuses line. If I wanted to delude myself into thinking SA was positive because it prevented me from dancing, thus preventing me from the unlikely possibility that I'd break my neck, I don't need some random stranger raining on my parade with a copy of my dad's lecture.


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## ozkr (Dec 2, 2005)

layitontheline said:


> You're not familiar with sarcasm, are you.
> 
> And don't patronize me with that excuses line. If I wanted to delude myself into thinking SA was positive because it prevented me from dancing, thus preventing me from the unlikely possibility that I'd break my neck, I don't need some random stranger raining on my parade with a copy of my dad's lecture.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poe's_law
IT'S THE LAW!
But seriously, there's so much rationalization going on in this thread that it becomes hard to discern between honesty and sarcasm.


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## JamieHasAnxiety (Feb 15, 2011)

I can see the world in a different way, I see how everything is a delicate balance, and those who live normally don't see the world for what it really is.


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## Shooterrr (Jul 19, 2009)

Still thinking about it...


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## chwol (Feb 19, 2011)

singingherbs said:


> I decided to do appreciation affirmations (like what do I appreciate in my life etc.)
> Then I thought of doing positive SA affirmations. SA is always labeled as a bad thing right? I know it may be hard but it will give you a break to try seeing SA as positive. I know far-fetched right? But this is what I came up with. If anyone else can come up with anything, please share!
> 
> There is evidence of everlasting support from those around me
> ...


I really think that it comes from within you - it is definately a human condition - it can be a sign of what is out there and what it means to you.

But really - the very first thing is - belief in yourself; it really comes from that. If you can do something that you believe in - anything, this will give you the base to develop yourself from. so if you can lay bricks - this is really strong. it is doing something that has results - i.e. put one on another - It Will Produce Something - out of the ground - built - By You. This will give you faith in yourself - that you Can Do Something. i.e. You Matter. It's really important.. If you feel you can control your environment - you will be much more relaxed.. Risk getting it wrong - or it taking a bit longer, we are all human, you Will get there.


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## NoodleLover (Feb 19, 2011)

Moving on with life while having SA gives me the feeling that those people who do are super strong inside.


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