# Afraid of "relapse"



## pinkcouture (Oct 9, 2009)

Hi there, 

Over the past 2 years I've done a lot of growing and coming out of my shell, so to speak. I am now at a much better place than I was once was, able to do things I never thought I'd be able to do. 

I really just followed the advice from the book "Feel the fear and do it anyway." I just tell myself that no matter what happens, I can handle it. No matter what I will survive. I deserve better than this, than being stuck in this prison of fear... that kind of thing.

However, I have this paranoid worry that one day this could all be taken away from me. Afterall I never really had a concrete way of dealing with fear. I don't have a 1-2 step plan for dealing with social anxiety. 

So my question is, is it possible to have social anxiety return even after you've overcome it? Because I still experience fear in many situations, but not to the same intense degree and not over so many different situations. My fears are limited to a few scenarios (like speaking in front loads of people, speaking to people in authority, etc. )


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

I see social anxiety as an ongoing battle in ones life similar to that of an addict so there's always the chance of relapse but if you spend your time concerning yourself over it you'll likely induce it yourself. Celebrate your accomplishments & keep your focus there, if a relapse happens you can deal with it then as you know you have before


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

We all have phases where anxiety could be bad.
Mine happened in 2004-2005 and in October, 2009. If you notice in that last sentence that the second incident is shorter than the first (much shorter). That is one thing we discover about growing through the SA issues - we train ourselves not to react as bad as we did. We learn the skills to handle these issues. 

We also cannot live with the fear of relapse - waiting for the next disaster to strike when it may not even happen. Anxiety will always be a part of our lives as it is for other people. We just know what to do to handle it better than other people.


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## jook (Nov 25, 2009)

It's good that you're asking yourself this question so that you're conscious of the possiblity. As in any type of recovery, not factoring in possible relapse can lead to an unpleasant surprise that's worse because you're flying high and then out of nowhere, "Wham!" So it's good you're thinking about relapse BEFORE it happens. That's one thing.

The other thing is, again like any good recovery program you have to keep taking the medicine that healed you in the first place. Periodically you should return to that book, or whatever other tools you used to get to where you are, and reinforce those plugs in your brain. By taking this proactive approach you can drastically reduce your chances of having a relapse, and even if you do, it won't be as bad because your "armor" so to speak, will be readily available to your mind.

Happy for success! You're an inspiration for others with SA


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## jook (Nov 25, 2009)

Hi CB:

I listened to your demo and it was nice like the earth after a fresh rain...you're very talented and I hope you'll be able to get your music and talent out there. Just a note...one of the greatest performers ever, Marvin Gaye, had extreme overwhelming performance anxiety. I'm sure I'll go listen again. thanks


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## jook (Nov 25, 2009)

the above message was for Canadian Brother


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## Miss Meggie (Nov 19, 2009)

pinkcouture said:


> I really just followed the advice from the book "Feel the fear and do it anyway." I just tell myself that no matter what happens, I can handle it. No matter what I will survive. I deserve better than this, than being stuck in this prison of fear... that kind of thing.
> 
> However, I have this paranoid worry that one day this could all be taken away from me. Afterall I never really had a concrete way of dealing with fear. I don't have a 1-2 step plan for dealing with social anxiety.


Try not to worry about relapsing too much. Unless you have signs that you're going to relapse, I feel that thinking about it too much could be the thing that will eventually cause you to relapse. Just my thoughts...
But if you start to feel that some of your old anxieties are coming back, keep telling yourself what you said above. ^ It obviously helped you to get better in the past, so it should help if you feel you're starting to relapse.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

I had a "relapse" in October. Trust me, if you are actively working on overcoming SA, it will get better.

This "relapse" is lighter in intensity and in duration......far less time than the first time in 2004-2005.


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