# I'm so awkward it's embarrassing



## sundays (Jan 11, 2011)

Whenever someone talks to me, I freeze up and I have no idea what to say and I will most likely end up humiliating myself. It's gotten so bad, that I'm even awkward around my sister. For example, when someone tells me a joke, I either end up just nodding awkwardly or laughing but not saying anything at all. Either way it ends up in a long awkward silence. I think I ruin people's moods  People think I'm really annoying :'(
Does anyone else have severe awkwardness? I don't think I've ever met anyone as awkward as me before.


----------



## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

Me too. It's gotten so bad that during awkward convo's, I find myself nearly turning my back to the person I'm talking to....even family. I think I'm meant to be a hermit.


----------



## Retranslated (Mar 2, 2011)

Do people *tell* you you're annoying? If not, you're probably just beating yourself up like the rest of us. That said, I don't think there's a person here who doesn't feel at least a little bit awkward in social situations. Take comfort in knowing you are your own worst critic, and there are many people out there like you.


----------



## Propaganda (Oct 26, 2010)

Retranslated has a point that should be taken to heart. So take the time to reread his post. It's cool, I will wait.

The thing is even if you make a complete fool of yourself, hard to do BTW, these things role right off the majority populous. So, unless you trying to impress complete idiots, those type do hold stereotypical first impressions for life, don't worry about it at all, it will be forgotten.

There was a famous study that proved 1 = 2. Meaning that for every silly thing you did all it took was two things to recoup the cools points so your asshattery was erased. Ok, you're right, I made it up but still.......


----------



## lostintransition (Mar 1, 2011)

Exposure is to me the best way to deal with family. Ever heard the saying, "You can choose your friends and not your family"? Yes it has a few flaws but they will understand if you have problems. They will help you. For example, every day I tell a joke(s) and some of them are corkers but some go down like a lead balloon. I smile and laugh regardless, not just beacuase I see the funny side to nearly everything, because I want to beat my demons and give my family joy at the same time.


----------



## Tess4u (Feb 6, 2011)

I think your thinking too much into it Hun, it happens to the best of us:/ please don't beat yourself down about it, relax, and don't sweat it, what happened happened, just try to relax and regroup your thoughts better next time. I seem to have moments where I'm awkward too and me thinking of myself as awkward causes me to be more, it's not until I rethink the situation at another time I realize it was just in my head and that my thoughts were not real, I just seemed to manifest them.


----------



## izuhbelluh (Feb 25, 2011)

You are NOT alone. I'm so beyond awkward it's insane.
Like the other day, I babysat for these people for the first time, and as the lady introduced me to her kids, the first thing I said was, "you have a nice tv"...
and then I just said hi to the two kids, and asked how they were, and after that it was dead quiet for like, a good 30 seconds before their mom said something, and instructed me on when they go to bed. 
So, trust me, I know exactly how you feel.


----------



## AshCash (Oct 31, 2009)

Awkward is the perfect way to describe my personality,but I don't think that's a BAD thing,because there are quite a few people just like us,we should make a HAIR BAND!


----------



## dreamingfear (May 23, 2010)

I'm very awkward too. Since I hardly talk to people I sometimes forget how to form speech when I do talk to people and my speech can come out slow or just awkward. Or something people can just tell I'm shy and awkward because I don't talk "cool."


----------



## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

dreamingfear said:


> Since I hardly talk to people I sometimes forget how to form speech when I do talk to people and my speech can come out slow or just awkward.


Yeah, this has been getting to me a lot lately. For some reason, I have to buy my music in a store rather than online, and it seems like a clerk tries to approach me *every* couple of minutes to see how I'm doing.

_"Smile and say yes. Just smile and say yes. Maybe he'll leave you alone."_


----------



## lostintransition (Mar 1, 2011)

Everybody is awkard. Some people have good days and some have bad days. We all have, as humans, our own uniqueness but we also all have the same emotions. Try not to dwell on it.


----------



## Bigmac14 (Oct 18, 2012)

If ur not in college yet then make sure you go through rush. I use to be really awkward around people, but rushing is a fantastic way to boost your social skills


----------



## tsuga (Jul 12, 2012)

Holy post bump, Batman. But it's interesting; glad I read it.


----------



## Clarry (Oct 22, 2012)

story of my life... i feel exactly the same as you do. i even find being around my family awkward now. its gotten so bad. now i feel like i have no friends and nobody likes me because im so awkward. i always find myself making up excuses for not interacting with people, and since im always too scared to say anything, everytime i talk, i find myself getting really tongue tied and stuttery and i just sound really awkward. i wish it would just go away


----------



## OreoSundae (Oct 15, 2012)

sundays said:


> Whenever someone talks to me, I freeze up and I have no idea what to say and I will most likely end up humiliating myself. It's gotten so bad, that I'm even awkward around my sister. *For example, when someone tells me a joke, I either end up just nodding awkwardly or laughing but not saying anything at all. Either way it ends up in a long awkward silence. I think I ruin people's moods  People think I'm really annoying :'(*
> Does anyone else have severe awkwardness? I don't think I've ever met anyone as awkward as me before.


Ohhhhhhh man. I know exactly how you feel. I am so awkward 8| I tense up and nod like crazy, and I smile whenever they smile xD

There are also some situations where they use a word or term and I have absolutely no idea what it means. But instead of asking "I'm sorry, what is ____?" like a normal person, I just continue smiling and nodding like I get what they're saying. Sometimes they then ask "do you know what I'm talking about, by the way?" And then I'm embarrassed because I have absolutely no idea and feel that they think I'm a terrible listener and am stupid.

Yeah. So very awkward..

I really hope to improve this, to stop and ask for clarification if something is not clear to me. But back to your case, OP, I think we really do think too much on these things. In particular, I want to pay attention to the part of your post that I put in bold. OP, everyone has their awkward moments in conversations. But to go as far as thinking you've ruined someone's mood, and that you're really annoying... that is almost always not the case. Many a time I have thought the same thing - but I later would find out that they didn't even remember the awkward moment, or they didn't put a second thought into it.

And even if it did bother them enough, you shouldn't care about it, y'know? People who matter don't mind, and people who mind don't matter. I'm sure your sister knows your troubles and is pretty understanding about it.

Keep working on your conversation skills, and when things are going...not as planned, tell yourself it's okay. Then brush it off! Walk it off! Brush it, brush it, brushhh it off! Don't hold onto bad experiences >_< I too need to work on this.

Good luck OP~! <3


----------



## xxbluejay21 (Apr 12, 2012)

I fcking hate being awkward. I'm trying so hard to change these days but with the anxiety attacking me every time I make a move and awkwardness driving people away from me it's so fkin hard to be outgoing. Damn it I hate life.


----------



## TediousMind (Apr 4, 2012)

Geez, I thought I was the only one that did that. :um

Yeah, I get strangers socializing with me all the time on my college campus. From afar, I know I probably look very friendly and inviting. Though the moment they approach me and I start interacting with them, I feel as though they could be thinking, "oh god... why did I even bother?"

Often, I usually have nothing to contribute as far as conversation goes and I think it's because I'm not very good at thinking on-the-fly in such a way. A few days are better than others though, but only a sad few.

Oh, how I wish we could show our true colors to people, and not let our anxieties get the better of us...


----------



## mattmc (Jun 27, 2013)

I'm awkward around everyone. This is why unlike other people I don't prize "real life" interaction. Sure, hugs are nice, but aside from that there is no benefit to me. Unless being unable to express yourself and feeling inadequate is secretly a good thing.


----------



## keerthi100 (Apr 28, 2017)

I know its a late response but wanted to add something
Have you ever thought about whether it had something to do with your childhood experiences? 
Was there anyone constantly belittling you as a child, like a family member or teacher. That was at least the case with me, my dad was really critical of me and i'm just scared to talk to people now. I figured its low self-esteem because of which people's opinions matter way too much to me. It's only recently that I've learnt all of this from my therapist. Just make sure you're not missing out on something important. :smile2:


----------



## keerthi100 (Apr 28, 2017)

Have you ever thought about whether it had something to do with your childhood experiences? 
Was there anyone constantly belittling you as a child, like a family member or teacher. That was at least the case with me, my dad was really critical of me and i'm just scared to talk to people now. I figured its low self-esteem because of which people's opinions matter way too much to me. It's only recently that I've learnt all of this from my therapist. Just make sure you're not missing out on something important.


----------



## danstelter1983 (Feb 7, 2017)

*Used to be awkward and "freeze"*

I commend you on talking about it. Opening up is the first step to healing. And when your social anxiety's so high, that's hard to do.

I used to feel awkward and freeze in social situations all the time (as a teen). Especially around people I didn't know well.

In hindsight, my self-esteem was through the floor. I mean, it couldn't get any worse. I didn't like me. Anyone else. Or anything in the world.

You can try going on medication. But that likely won't help a ton. It may make your anxiety go down enough where you feel freer to make some conversation and grow a little.

For me, I had to do A LOT of work on myself. Someone else here said to expose yourself to the situation...and that was certainly part of the solution too.

Experience and action win the day.

I took a personal inventory of all the good and bad things about me. I chose to allow life to happen on its own terms instead of making myself responsible for everything.

It took hundreds of conversations with other healthy people to make progress on these issues.

Serving others helped a ton too. It's my goal to serve others as much as possible...at work, home, out in public, everywhere. It gets me out of social anxiety, which wants to suck me inward at all costs.

Intense exercise helps. I don't do this as much as I used to. But, I go for a 3-mile run, or lift heavy weights. The intensity of the exercise clears that anxiety out.

With more severe social anxiety, you may choose to exercise more intensely and more frequently. Or not. It's up to you.

Simple social skills, like asking open-ended (not yes/no) questions, and taking a genuine interest in the other person go far too.

You can do it. Surround yourself with people who genuinely care about you and want you to do well.

Share your innermost fears, thoughts, and feelings with others in person. But only with people you trust completely. That might mean making a friend here on the forum and taking the relationship offline.

Anyway, it takes time. But it's well worth the effort. Reach out when you struggle and you'll find the strength to continue.


----------

