# Does anyone else not like talking about themselves to other people?



## paintgirl (Mar 7, 2013)

I was kind of mad at my best friend because it feels like she's always talking about herself and our conversations revolve around her life. But I was thinking, and I don't really let our conversations be about me since I never talk about myself. Whenever the conversation is about me, I kind of redirect it to something else. I guess it's a fear that the other person will find me boring or that I'm unworthy or something.

Anyone else feel the same way?


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

Yeah I hate opening myself up to judgement like that. I'd rather let the other person do all the talking


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## cocooned (Jun 29, 2014)

Absolutely dread it. I try to change the subject too or avoid talking in the first place. There's too much I'd have to explain for the way I am, i avoid it at all costs.


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## Htki (Jul 10, 2014)

With the exception of one person I avoid it like the plague, last thing I want is being judged for my 'uniqueness'.


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## AndreaXo (Mar 22, 2014)

I feel the same exact way as you do. I'm trying to practice self-disclosure but I feel like they'll find me pathetic.


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## Siolenth (Jul 16, 2014)

I have one person that I'll tell most things to because I love and trust them, otherwise, even my best friends that I've known most of my life don't know a lot about me. I'm just a listener. And anyways, most of my life I feel like whenever I talk I either get interrupted or people don't really listen, so that's put a damper on me wanting to share things. I'm also really afraid of people gossiping, again because I myself am a listener, so I know how much people talk about others (in a good way or bad way)


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## Lemmy7437 (Jul 16, 2014)

I hate talking about myself. Especially when meeting someone you don't know e.g. in an interviewer the person asks "tell me about yourself".


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## W A N D E R L U S T (Oct 2, 2012)

Siolenth said:


> I have one person that I'll tell most things to because I love and trust them, otherwise, even my best friends that I've known most of my life don't know a lot about me. I'm just a listener. And anyways, most of my life I feel like whenever I talk I either get interrupted or people don't really listen, so that's put a damper on me wanting to share things. I'm also really afraid of people gossiping, again because I myself am a listener, so I know how much people talk about others (in a good way or bad way)


This explains me exactly!


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## anno529 (Jul 15, 2014)

Yuck! Hate talking about myself with a passion!!!! 

Any ideas on what we can do about it anyone?


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## NathanDrake (Jul 17, 2014)

Oh God, you hit the nail on the head. I loathe talking about myself to people because I'm not a noteworthy person at all. When talking with others, the conversation is almost always about them or some other topic. I feel like I should start talking about myself, though, because that way I can form lasting bonds with people, or at least not be so secretive because that's a trait I don't like in others, but I'm a hypocrite . I've gone as far as making up small lies about my past, embellishing my life a bit, which I'm sure others do, right?


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## Sarah86 (Jun 27, 2014)

Same here. I can talk about things or what's going on around me, but the thought of actually talking about myself makes me cringe. There are a few people that I feel okay opening up to, but I guess it depends on the person, for the most part. What's worse for me is receiving a compliment...I don't even know where to begin with that one.:um


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## mr hoang (Aug 14, 2011)

I dont like it but I dont try to avoid it. I understand its hard sometimes but its the only way people will get to know us better.


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

I don't like it because whenever I am talking about myself, especially when i meet someone new, I feel like I am bragging.


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## NathanDrake (Jul 17, 2014)

Sarah86 said:


> Same here. I can talk about things or what's going on around me, but the thought of actually talking about myself makes me cringe. There are a few people that I feel okay opening up to, but I guess it depends on the person, for the most part. What's worse for me is receiving a compliment...I don't even know where to begin with that one.:um


A compliment. Definitely! In my head I'm thinking "I didn't deserve that" and "most others could probably do better." So self defeating, but so very much my nature.


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## Sarah86 (Jun 27, 2014)

NathanDrake said:


> A compliment. Definitely! In my head I'm thinking "I didn't deserve that" and "most others could probably do better." So self defeating, but so very much my nature.


Exactly!! Not only that, it makes whatever confidence I did have go out the window, because I just know they didn't mean it or they just want something...:hide


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## HellCell (Jul 8, 2014)

Yes I'm like that too. Whenever the question "tell me about yourself?" is asked, it is followed by an awkward pause.

I find it uncomfortable telling people about myself because there are more negative traits than there is positive traits to boast about. The question I stated above implies "hey boast about yourself."


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## Htki (Jul 10, 2014)

NathanDrake said:


> A compliment. Definitely! In my head I'm thinking "I didn't deserve that" and "most others could probably do better." So self defeating, but so very much my nature.


I do that too, sometimes even say it and have people go like "just take the damn compliment weirdo".
I really can't. :sus


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## Visi0n (Jul 3, 2014)

Just balls up and start talking about yourself a bit and show interest in them during the conversation as well, that way it's not all focused on talking about you.


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## Sarah86 (Jun 27, 2014)

NathanDrake said:


> I've gone as far as making up small lies about my past, embellishing my life a bit, which I'm sure others do, right?


I hate to admit it, but I have done the same thing. It's the search for approval and validation which sends me over the edge sometimes. The only problem is it's just a temporary fix that was based on a lie; which makes me feel inadequate...thus the cycle continues...{{sigh}}


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## GrainneR (Feb 7, 2014)

Mostly, I just don't know what to say. My life is pretty boring, and anything else is kind of a downer. So, I avoid talking about myself.


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*I keep talking about myself. I love detail*

on this forum too.

In my nature. I'm sure I project a scum status - prone to judgement.
Disappointed and depressed

I do all the talking. I'm the preacher. Plenty to say

However people take over and shout at me if they don't like or absorb what I say. They are not 'reading between the lines' people and have a life of yes / no.

They think of only a rocker switch for lights. They might not realise there are more switches in their house.

I can't get anyone to talk about their job when they're comfortable with it. I talk about all of mine and how much I've loved them all and hated the people who stopped me doing them.

I read some psychologist article: everyone loves to talk about themselves'. That applies to me

People don't like listening and switch off quickly, but some do listen. 
I preach because I think my life is more interesting than theirs. Executives

The successful married with kids, holidays, big cars and homes do just get bored of me instantly. But some of this type don't open up to my inquisition.

I wonder what happens when we get old.

I have a theory brewing. Normal people are so thin-minded and get obsessed about their children, their jobs and nothing else. I'm getting a bit lost here. They love to invite their friends around for dinner.

People with kids hate getting old. 
Maybe they cherish their belongings and might live longer? Choose to retire early? All my family have.

I'm determined.

I've been alone a long time and a good survivor - mentally, healthwise, social and I still feel a 19-year-old rogue rebel. I've been in hospital a lot and jail.

Strangely I have enough to eat, which fluctuates a bit, roof over my head. No wife: no divorce. Couples argue on a cosmic level where I live, and includes my family

Dividing line of Society

Homelessness was a state I had planned when I was 25.


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## allthatsparkles (Mar 1, 2013)

I used to.

Back in high school, I didn't have any real hobbies or interests, so I dreaded talking about myself. Questions as simple as "Oh, so what do you like to do for fun?" or "What kind of music do you like?" would send me into a panic, because I generally didn't feel like I had any interests worth sharing.

But as I've grown as a person {developed real hobbies + had more life experience} I don't mind speaking about myself as much. Sometimes I can't even help myself if a topic that I'm really interested comes up -- I'm such a nerd about politics and travel, so I can't stop myself from talking if those topics are brought up.


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## Jammer25 (Feb 22, 2014)

If I'm in a professional situation (work, networking, conferences, etc.) I tend to keep it more mainstream and vanilla unless someone else brings up a niche topic I like. In most other social situations, I almost never talk about myself past the stage of water-cooler-style talk "oh, work/life/family is fine, I spent the holiday doing this" that sort of thing.

Nonetheless, it's usually a case-by-case basis to figure out what level of detail I am comfortable talking about.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

Same here.


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## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

Yes. It is my biggest problem/fear.


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## TheLoser (Jul 16, 2014)

Yes, I feel threatened and try to defend myself by turning the discussion into something general and unpersonal.


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## deadsilence (Jul 22, 2014)

*yep*

Yep I feel like this almost every time I converse. I don't feel like I have any thing to really tell people. People are always telling me something they think is important and I listen so well. But as soon as I talk I feel like it's either unimportant or people aren't giving me the same respect I give them. No one really pays any attention unless I say something super dramatic. But it's such an effort to be that dramatic. And it doesn't feel like my true personality. Then I feel so fake.


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## BlackHearts (Jul 21, 2014)

I am the same way! I used to never think about it (back when I was younger) but once I noticed how a lot of people would cut me off in the middle of me speaking I would feel daunted. Now I'm so used to not speaking about myself (with the exception of maybe just one or two people) that I get uncomfortable when people ask.


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## persona non grata (Jul 13, 2011)

It depends on my mood, but when I'm not feeling good about my life I'm embarrassed to explain the details. But that's really just me projecting, I'm very self critical but objectively other people aren't judging me the same way that I'm judging me.


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## Just Here (Jul 16, 2013)

I never like to draw attention to myself. My goal in life is to never to be seen by others if you meet me an notice me I'm not doing my job.

What I really hate are "ME" people. They drive me nuts going on an on about what they do where there going like who really cares. I avoid them like the plague.


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