# What did you do recently to get out of your comfort zone?



## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

What did you do recently to get out of your comfort zone?

Decided to create this topic, because lately I've been putting off doing a lot of things which are causing me anxiety. Most are social anxiety related but a few are other kinds of anxiety.

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So far today, I called some family friends to ask if I could use them for references. The references are for a place I sometimes help my dad volunteer at. They said I could use them.

Don't want to, but guess I'm heading to the bank now


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

@slyfox, in on this thread. Might start using this instead of annoying people so much with videos 

1. Returned jeans to Sainsburys (one of them no label) asked her how busy it was
2. Coffee in John Lewis (was ****), asked the guy what the difference between a Latte and Cappicino was. Asked how busy it was (bit of a theme) and informed him it was windy outside
3. Asked a random dude in Sainsburys for the time. Surprisingly difficult to do, though low anxiety. Hate that stuff cos it feels like I am imposing (and its initiating communication with a member of the public which is harder than employees).
4. Thanked the employee by the self service tills.

Also, slyfox, yeh phone calls suck, really. Even though I have been purposefully doing them as exposure, they still always suck, and I hate them. ****ing phones . My policy on phone calls now is to do them the day I know I have to do them, and as soon as possible, because:

1. They have to be done sometime (unavoidable)
2. They get worse the more they are put off.

Given that, the only logical way to handle them is to do them asap


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

@splendidbob

Keep up the great work! Videos are good too. I should really do those myself because it is something I'm highly uncomfortable with.

Yeah very true on phone calls. Now it has gotten to the point that I have anxiety calling the web host because they'll probably realize I haven't done much and it has been about a half a year. Have been putting off adding content until I call and get the problem fixed. Just have kept making excuses until it got ridiculous. Really need to start facing these things. Usually the calls aren't as bad as I anticipate anyway.

Have stuff to do today, but I plan to get it finally over with this Friday or next week.

I really need to overcome this with exposure therapy or I'm fool to think I could ever successfully run a home business.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

@slyfox

Thanks . Struggling atm to move things on, I need to plan this stuff better now. If I finally get my **** together and plan this, I will post it up so others can see.

Re vids and exposure, the trick is to graduate it nice and slow. So yeh, video would be really good for you to do btw (and for anyone with SA) because its half of the communication thing right? But just jumping in and making a vid, and posting it would be too much at once, so you could start with something like:

1. Make audio recording of yourself reading something 
2. Make audio recording of yourself and try to "jazz up the reading"
3. Make audio recording of yourself free speaking (including awkward pauses)
4. Do 1, then post up on the site
5. Do 2, then post up on the site (and so on)
6. Rinse and repeat with video

You can also increase exposure with the posting up on the site, by posting, waiting a few minutes, then removing, and gradually increasing the duration.

Unfortunately with phone calls, and rl stuff, it's not easy to graduate it, they kinda just have to be done.

Re the web host, here's the thing man, I recognise your thinking on this one. So lets consider someone who is working at the hosting company on customer support. Customer support phone line jobs obviously suck, they get pissy customers, probably **** pay, crap hours etc. Bored and tired. Hate their jobs, etc etc (hope nobody reading this does one of these jobs lol). They don't know you, they don't care about you really, you are just one of the 50 or 60 people they speak to every day.

Now, that person literally has 0 care for you or your site progress whatsoever, you are just another problem to fix. They won't care, in the _slightest_. Even if they did care, and judge you remotely, it doesn't even matter, because its someone you won't meet.

But I totally get it, I do  It's absolutely the kind of thing I would think too.

Maybe try writing down in advance what you will say (your opening line), as well as any other possible questions / things you might need to say. Also keep in mind what a successful call is here...

A successful call is ringing up and getting the hosting problem resolved. _Nothing more_. You don't need to come across in any particular way, you don't need to impress them, or not be anxious, your goal is simply to get the hosting problem fixed in any way possible, that's it. . In fact, I would look at it like this, you will be anxious, so your goal is to make the phone call despite the anxiety (it's like running a race with an injury), you shouldn't feel ashamed or self critical if you are anxious when making the call, you should feel proud, that's the thing, you are doing it _anyway_, with the kind of hurdle most people don't have.

Also, yeh, re worse before, try rating the anxiety before the call /10, during it and afterwards, my guess (and experience) is that before will be vastly inflated.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Little baby ones today

1. Short conversation about sausages with the lady at the deli counter in Tesco
2. Said thank you to the women at the self service checkout (kinda unusual there, they don't tend to do it).
3. Coke at the pub, asked the bartender what was going on with the scaffolding
4. 3 minor phone calls (not really much outside my comfort zone for those now)
5. Conversation with a woman down the road on the way to vote, went surprisingly well and I think I came across as _normal_ /gasp.
6. When voting I asked them how busy it had been and remarked that this election should be an interesting one


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

@splendidbob

Can't promise I'll do it soon, but good suggestions on the voice recordings.

Yeah I agree with you. The tech support person probably won't care much as long as I'm not rude. They deal with personal websites as well as business ones, so they are probably used to people not knowing what they are doing.

Good work on your challenges and getting out to vote!


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

- called a place today to confirm a referral and placement in a support group in the Fall

- gave my counselor the 'OK' to pass along my contact information to a resident psychiatrist-in-training who's going to do one-on-one with me under her supervision (I'll sooo be looking forward to the call...)


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

slyfox said:


> @splendidbob
> 
> Can't promise I'll do it soon, but good suggestions on the voice recordings.
> 
> ...


Ty 

Ooh, I have a small idea / experiment re the phone call (if you don't mind me suggesting). I am guessing you will likely experience anxiety even thinking about doing it, right? Or writing down the opening words you will say, etc. So you could do a hierarchy for this specific task.

Get a piece of paper and rate out of 10 before the activity, during, and after. Write down the score after each repetition.

Day 1: Walk into the room with the phone, stand near the phone and think about picking up the phone to make the phonecall. Just imagine picking up the phone with the intention of phoning. Score it (before you entered the room, during thinking about doing it and after). Walk out of the room, walk back in (check anxiety again) and repeat. Score it. Do this for 10-20 minutes until you get bored of it (lol seriously). Make sure you score each time.

*Edit, removed other days, if you are willing to do this, I can give you the next day after you do day 1 and report what happened re scores (this might not work btw lol, but I figure there is no harm trying day 1 to see right? ).



Just Lurking said:


> - called a place today to confirm a referral and placement in a support group in the Fall
> 
> - gave my counselor the 'OK' to pass along my contact information to a resident psychiatrist-in-training who's going to do one-on-one with me under her supervision (I'll sooo be looking forward to the call...)


Good stuff - groups are initially scary, but in my experience very effective (even though I have dodged mine a couple of times). Good work on the call too . I was glad to see recently you were back giving treatment another go (and good job posting the pics too recently btw ).


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Ooh today, yeh, was an accidentally cracking exposure (thanks super talkative woman in the coffee shop, I know where to go now for convo practice).

1. Went to my gym in normal clothes, walked through gym, entered my license plate to abuse free parking, wandered out (mildly out of comfort zone)

2. Went to Debenhams, decided to ask an employee if there was a cafe, saw an attractive woman by the make up etc, had the thought "no, I will ask someone else", so went and asked her

3. Went upstairs near to the cafe, asked an employee if he knew where the cafe was. He misunderstood and thought I was asking for where the coffee machines were. I almost thanked him and walked away, but caught myself and clarified and said "no, I mean the actual cafe where I can get a coffee", he explained it was just behind me

(catching those little ******* avoidy thoughts)

4. Ordered a coffee, told the girl taking the order I was experiencing caffeine withdrawal, she laughed politely, but was unimpressed .

5. Upon catching myself think about "I should ask about calorie info" and then making an excuse, I decided to ask the employee cleaning the tables, she misheard me and thought I was asking generally about calorie info (I really need to say things more clearly, its a problem). Had a convo with her about her weight loss, asked her lots of questions (mainly her talking).

After 5 minutes or so, an old guy came in and sat down, and joined in the convo, when I had finished my coffee maybe 10 mins or so, I stood up and started making signs I was going to go (not sure how to gracefully exit). She started finishing up what she was saying and asked me to make sure I come back in and let her know how its going . I said I would and said goodbye to her and the old guy.

V cool. Totally wasn't expecting to initiate a decent long convo.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

splendidbob said:


> Good stuff - groups are initially scary, but in my experience very effective (even though I have dodged mine a couple of times). Good work on the call too . I was glad to see recently you were back giving treatment another go (and good job posting the pics too recently btw ).


Thanks for this.

Keep up the good fight


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I answered phones at that job that only lasted 2 weeks. Most of the time I let my coworker answer them. She was very nice to do that. Unfortunately, she had a 30 minute lunch break and she was a smoker. Once an hour for 5-7 minutes she'd go for a smoke break outside. And she's a fidgety person, so constantly roaming around the office doing things and talking to coworkers. 

It was horrible because almost all the calls for the office went through the phones at the front. And you had to screen the calls because the boss guy and one other guy would only talk to certain people. Somehow I was supposed to know who they are willing and not willing to talk to. Plus there were all these cold calls from sales people. I didn't know businesses got bombarded with those sorts of phone calls. 

This experience has only confirmed that I hate phone calls.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

I was basically still benzod today, so none of mine really counts but:

1. Tried on a tee shirt and asked the girl if she thought the colour was ok on me
2. Talked to the guy at Harris & Hoole about his lack of beard, he had to shave it off because something got spilled on it and he couldn't get the smell out /gasp


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## Awkwardpotato (Jun 5, 2017)

1. Called my boss from my internship to ask if I could come back to work for her during the summer
2. Helped someone put a book back into the shelf
3. Said hi to my neighbours
4. Gave directions, then ran back after the people to help them when I saw them going the wrong way


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## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

1. I wore pink today lol I know it seems trivial but I haven't worn bright colors since I was a child.


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## Awkwardpotato (Jun 5, 2017)

flyingMint said:


> 1. I wore pink today lol I know it seems trivial but I haven't worn bright colors since I was a child.


Yay for you! Pink is great!


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## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

Awkwardpotato said:


> Yay for you! Pink is great!


Thanks  I've been trying to step out of my comfort zone, I usually wear stuff that helps me blend in and not stand out, felt pretty good!


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## penguinbeak (Jun 5, 2017)

I was at my brother's hens party and I went to the bar and asked for drinks 4 times on Friday. I danced in my other brother's wedding and read during church last month(not really recent). However, while reading, it felt horrible like it always does and I was shivering right afterwards. Not doing that again. Said good morning to my uncle who I barely know.


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

splendidbob said:


> Ty
> 
> Ooh, I have a small idea / experiment re the phone call (if you don't mind me suggesting). I am guessing you will likely experience anxiety even thinking about doing it, right? Or writing down the opening words you will say, etc. So you could do a hierarchy for this specific task.
> 
> ...


Thanks for the advice. I'm hoping to just call one day this week and get it over with, but can maybe give that a try later today or tomorrow.

Yeah I get a lot of anxiety thinking just thinking about it. Also get a lot of guilt/depression about things I've put off for so long. Find I have a hard time getting in the right frame of mind to make calls, but sometimes once I start I'm able to get momentum going and get multiple calls over with.


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## Awkwardpotato (Jun 5, 2017)

slyfox said:


> Thanks for the advice. I'm hoping to just call one day this week and get it over with, but can maybe give that a try later today or tomorrow.
> 
> Yeah I get a lot of anxiety thinking just thinking about it. Also get a lot of guilt/depression about things I've put off for so long. Find I have a hard time getting in the right frame of mind to make calls, but sometimes once I start I'm able to get momentum going and get multiple calls over with.


Me too!


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

@slyfox, give it a go, if it works then by day 5 or so you should make the phonecall automatically without much anxiety (I don't know if it will work though, its an experiment ). Need to report back your anxiety scores tho.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Nothing much today, feeling too fatigued and low, and have run out of ideas. Returned a tee shirt, but then decided to ask whether I could exchange it for another one instead.


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

Just made a call to thank someone for letting me use them as a reference. My dad knew her and had gotten her information for me. Went pretty good. Think it's best to just do these things right away when I can.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Today I had my group, made some conversation asked some questions as best I could (wasn't really feeling it today cos my neck wasn't the best) but struggled on. The group wont be lasting for long I think though now, so will need to find a replacement for this kind of enforced interaction.

Oh, went into town again and went into a sports shop and asked where the goggles were (fairly forcefully since they were nattering and facing away. I am now strong at asking for things in shops, at the very least lol). Also asked her about one of the water bottles behind the till even though there was a queue forming behind me .

One day a week I am going to do a majorish thing from feared scenarios / places. This week it is going to be going swimming. I have some nice little shorts, some goggles and a cute little swimming hat. Obviously I will make a video in the goggles and hat once done . No idea how my neck is going to handle the swim. I might do this or haircut, umming and aahing. Swimming is a 5/10, haircut is a 7. Should do swim, but put off hair for a long time. hmm.



flyingMint said:


> 1. I wore pink today lol I know it seems trivial but I haven't worn bright colors since I was a child.


Not trivial at all, I struggle wearing bright colours too . I think I wore an identical set of the same clothes for nearly 10 years.



slyfox said:


> Just made a call to thank someone for letting me use them as a reference. My dad knew her and had gotten her information for me. Went pretty good. Think it's best to just do these things right away when I can.


Yay, good stuff . I need to manufacture up a few phone call exposures, haven't done any for a while.


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

splendidbob said:


> Yay, good stuff . I need to manufacture up a few phone call exposures, haven't done any for a while.


I'm thinking of holding off your 5 day plan since I've been getting myself to make some calls. Not sure if your plan would work as well when I'm making calls.

Made another call today. Called my medical insurance. Turned out the problem was easily resolved in less than 5 minutes. I put myself through a lot of stress putting off the call and worrying about it for nothing.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

slyfox said:


> I'm thinking of holding off your 5 day plan since I've been getting myself to make some calls. Not sure if your plan would work as well when I'm making calls.
> 
> Made another call today. Called my medical insurance. Turned out the problem was easily resolved in less than 5 minutes. I put myself through a lot of stress putting off the call and worrying about it for nothing.


Oh yeh, don't worry about it, if you can just keep making calls and then you will one day just be able to do the hosting one . I wish I could come up with enough calls to make one every day, I don't think the phone anxiety would last that long if I did.


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

splendidbob said:


> Oh yeh, don't worry about it, if you can just keep making calls and then you will one day just be able to do the hosting one . I wish I could come up with enough calls to make one every day, I don't think the phone anxiety would last that long if I did.


Good luck on going swimming btw! I've had too much anxiety to go myself. A rehabilitation doctor was pushing for me to exercise in a pool for my back, but they didn't seem to be understanding that my anxiety prevents me from doing that.

Not sure if this is a good recommendation or not, but you could call stores asking if they have a certain product. Probably best to ask about products you think they are likely to know if they have it, so they don't have to go looking for it in the store.

Know yesterday I also made a call asking about some special shampoo for my dad's dog. Something like that causes me far less anxiety than calling tech support or an insurance company though.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

@slyfox, that's a good idea  - I am ok now with the longer phone calls its just literally phoning seems to induce anxiety, so if I can phone somewhere and ask something regularly that will probably do it. Struggling a little today for tasks to do, I might phone up the hairdressers and make an appointment for next week . (weirdly anxious and low mood today though so everything is a lot more difficult for some reason).

*edit, made it. Really nervy phone call that one. Made much worse cos I know whats coming lol. So next Wednesday I confront a very old phobia (7/10 task, maybe an 8 ).

Only objective is to get the haircut I want tho, no pressure on being chatty or any of that **** this time .


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

Mowed the lawn today. Got out of my comfort zone in multiple ways.

There were some teenagers out front, which caused me a lot of anxiety. I was tempted to quit but forced myself to do it.

I also wanted to just sleep and stay in bed all day, but forced myself to get out of bed and work on it.

My back and leg hurt quite a bit, but I forced myself to finish. Have already been to doctors a bunch for the back pain. Was tempting to just mow the front half but didn't think I'd have enough motivation to get back on it tomorrow.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Good stuff @slyfox. You have to move the goalposts on this stuff. Some days you feel like nothing is possible, other days you feel like you can do tonnes. Just going against that urge to withdraw / do nothing is enough to give yourself a little pat on the back tbh. Doing that long term is where real change happens imo.

Did some good exposures today. Randomly told a worker in Sainsburys that the yoghurts there you couldn't actually buy that size in Tesco (I had the thought to say this, then thought "that would be a stupid thing to say", so said it anyway ).

Then had really good chats with the women in the coffee shop about weight loss and such. Second time someone has said to me recently "you don't look like you used to weigh that much" as if there would be a sort of partially transparent shadow of me at my former weight shimmering around me. No idea what to do tomorrow.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

-Bought some ear infection spray, talked to the lady a bit about the spray
-Bought some prawn toast, asked about busyness etc, dropped the prawn toast a bunch of times
-Walked backwards down an aisle looking at frozen stuff
-Walked backwards to my car half of the walk with cars driving past me


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## Dall545 (Sep 9, 2015)

Posted couple times here, then returned to lurker status. Wanted to return earlier, but in my mind it just more stressfull the longer I waited. Common knowledge to me that the more you wait, the more stressfull it gets  The mind is weird.


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## Aly (Nov 30, 2010)

Well, I bought a plane ticket to fly across the country to Alaska to visit my friend lol


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Forgot about this thread  Should post my littleuns in here when they aren't big enough to make a vid about.

So both today and yesterday have been off my game a bit. Weds haircut was a big thing so been struggling to do stuff after that. I did a few things though:

1. Browsed around some shops I initially had the thought I could go in, but didn't (I don't know why I struggle with some shops, but when I get that urge to avoid its an easy task so I will take it)
2. Kinda screwed up basic till stuff (hi you alright, and have a nice day) with the same person. Just repeated "have a nice day" afterwards anyway, after the both speaking at the same time thing. Wasn't fussed by it really.
3. Bought a leather jacket for the winter, 30% off, reduced, still a bit expensive, but def my thing. Wrestling with whether to take it back, have 28 days to decide. I asked a staff member where the changing rooms were (she had evidently seen me walk up from right outside the changing rooms lol) cos she told me they were back where I had come from. Asked the till woman if I could try them on. She tried to flog me some store credit card, I agreed, then told her I had changed my mind (assertiveness yay). Might have been a bit forceful as she was frosty afterwards lol (maybe she gets a signup bonus). 
4. Rang up and said I wanted to pay for swimming membership said I wanted to ask some questions, upon hearing it was 6 months minimum I said I would maybe do it later need to check with my physio next week (assertiveness)
5. Fairly loudly and boldly "excuse me can I get through here" in Tesco (a bit over assertive, but meh, probably not **** it). Also asked staff member where cotton buds were. Annoyingly asking tasks have regained some avoidance (grr).

Lots of little ones today, nothing significant and nothing very challenging so I shouldn't really be posting them. Need to up my game a bit but am struggling to find the bravery to do any convo stuff atm for some reason.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Todays:

1. Asked a young fella for the time. The young lady he was with seemed amused, for some reason, was odd but decided best not to give it any post event rumination. Anxiety for this task is probably only about a 3 or 4 out of 10. Really hard to rate this one, I avoid it more than the anxiety justifies.
2. Chatted quite a bit with the lady at the till. About the weather, obviously lol, but turns out her son was born on the same year as me (she reminded me a bit of my mum heh). She seemed a bit brightened up by the little convo, so it was a nice one.
3. I managed to just about half smile at a young lady in the gym (in time), she definitely smiled at me and I usually would look away or something but a half smile just about in time. Smiling at random women is one of my tasks lol.

That was all. Am focusing more on my jewellery atm but need to keep the exposures ticking over as I haven't really been doing too much on them.


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

Went to a concert yesterday with my wife. Quite good fun actually even if it was Bach and not really my cup of tea. It made her happy and the theatre was beautiful.

Today I'm going to a focus group for an agency that asked for my help - they have been good to me in the past so want to return the favour, but those things make me pretty nervous.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

don said:


> Today I'm going to a focus group for an agency that asked for my help - they have been good to me in the past so want to return the favour, but those things make me pretty nervous.


Sounds like a great thing to do Don . Hope it all goes smoothly.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Talk on the phone.


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

splendidbob said:


> Sounds like a great thing to do Don . Hope it all goes smoothly.


Thanks Bob - I get nervous in those situations for some reason but I'll probably be okay when I get there. I'm about to leave now - will push myself.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

don said:


> Thanks Bob - I get nervous in those situations for some reason but I'll probably be okay when I get there. I'm about to leave now - will push myself.


Yup, you got it np Don . You definitely will be ok in there, anticipation is always the worst.


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## Raz SAD (Jun 13, 2017)

@splendidbob You are doing great job on your exposure. Very inspiring.

Can you share your approach to exposure therapy? Are you specifically going out of your way to do excercises or you interwine them with day-to-day tasks? Are you doing excercises every day? After work on during the day? Do you have an hierarchy or just doing something on every opportunity?

I started exposure therapy couple of months ago and it's going somewhat slow. Lurking the forum for some insights


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## Raz SAD (Jun 13, 2017)

@splendidbob Nevermind. I've read your exposure threads. Very helpful information.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Today I spoke to a young lady on the till at Tesco about her driving test (or her passing her theory test ) - was quite pleased she decided to tell me as I guess I must have come across as friendly and pleasant.

@Raz SAD thanks. I wrote that a while back, I am actually trying to incorporate it more into the stuff I do for fun, but as that is mainly just going to the gym and swimming atm, sometimes those opportunities wont come up. I did speak to some people today at the gym and did some creepy half smiles at women though :lol. (they love the creepy half smiles).


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

splendidbob said:


> Today I spoke to a young lady on the till at Tesco about her driving test (or her passing her theory test ) - was quite pleased she decided to tell me as I guess I must have come across as friendly and pleasant.
> 
> @Raz SAD thanks. I wrote that a while back, I am actually trying to incorporate it more into the stuff I do for fun, but as that is mainly just going to the gym and swimming atm, sometimes those opportunities wont come up. I did speak to some people today at the gym and did some creepy half smiles at women though :lol. (*they love the creepy half smiles).*


They do mate - they're only human. And that gif is one of my favourites - there's another one somewhere of a middle-aged (asian?) guy that's even better. I can't help but laugh every time I see those.

As for me I just helped an old lady get on the tram. I didn't actually have much choice as she was one of these very vocal ladies that just start yelling out for someone to help with their walker. Then I had to get up and give her my seat - but not before I held onto her so she wouldn't fall over.

Surprisingly I don't really find these things embarassing anymore - when you look around everyone is busy looking somewhere else hoping they don't have to do anything themselves. Plus I've had quite a few "crazies" (as in - outwardly more evident mental health issues than I have) people on the trams lately so I'm getting very used to tram travel in inner Melbourne.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Forgot to note yesterdays.

Went swimming and joined up for 3 months membership. Was a fair bit of interaction there, had to ask the guy at the desk, and he gave me a free swim because of the limited time, then had to sign up and pay upstairs. Did some chat up there but was tough. I noticed a definite freezing thing in conversation, I kinda freeze and all conversation possibilities dry up.

@don yeh, love that gif heh. He is an adorable creep / pervert though. Gj on the tram. Yeh, I have noticed that kind of thing before. Many years back I noticed a blind fella struggling because there were some roadworks and a fence up and he wasn't able to navigate it and nobody was helping him so I did.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Minor stuffs today, sorta. Asked in two chemists about salt tablets and support stockings for raising blood pressure. Asked a rather burly chap for the time in Tesco. Smiled and said hello to a woman in the gym. The last one I actually had no intention of doing at that moment but did without thinking .


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## Jolese (Jan 4, 2005)

This is a great thread. I haven't been on the site for quite some time, but what a great way to stay positive and focus on progress!! 

For myself I attended a kid's b-day party where it was all related family and I only knew two people as distant acquaintances. I initially wasn't going to go, because of the stress I imagined I would feel, but then did go when the child's Mom expressed disappointment over the fact of not going.

In the end, it was a very positive experience overall, glad I attended.


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## Jolese (Jan 4, 2005)

Just read the couple parts about helping the elderly/disabled. Kudos to you. That's really cool, and just also in general all the work being done to move forward. Great job!


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## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

I tried to keep the conversation going with the toll drivers. They were actually entertaining so I'm glad I did.


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## cinto (Jun 19, 2017)

Kept eye contact for the majority of the conversation with the school administrator whilst having a conversation. I usually look at people in their eyes when we are conversing but not long before I start to stare away.

Its kinda sad that I still do this and Im in my late 20's. It's part because of my vision. I also told her I have anxiety and she looked surprised. Another thing I don't normally do. 

Everyday I am suppressing my fears, I tuck them in so deep, it's depressing.


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## worthlessness1979 (Apr 18, 2017)

I signed up for school.


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## Raymond444 (Jul 28, 2017)

I have had anxiety for the last three years and since the first day I had a panic attack June 2014 I can't seem to make eye contact without my body flushing with adrenaline!i have had CBT helped a lot but not enough no matter what I do or shift my focus it does not help I have always been confident but lack of eye contact makes me come across as the opposite ! When I'm on the train or bus or in restraunt or standing in a group I don't know we're to gaze it's turning me insane


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

Aside from going outside to mow the lawn, not much


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

Raymond444 said:


> I have had anxiety for the last three years and since the first day I had a panic attack June 2014 I can't seem to make eye contact without my body flushing with adrenaline!i have had CBT helped a lot but not enough no matter what I do or shift my focus it does not help I have always been confident but lack of eye contact makes me come across as the opposite ! When I'm on the train or bus or in restraunt or standing in a group I don't know we're to gaze it's turning me insane


I have a lot of trouble with eye contact as well. Not sure it has caused me blushing though. Have had blushing when attention is focused on me. I'm also not sure what to do with my body when around people. Feel very awkward when in waiting rooms.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Agreed to go to church with this older lady that likes me on Sunday. Plus she is driving us there. Hmm should be interesting but worth it.


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## slyfox (Nov 18, 2007)

Forced myself to get a haircut


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Went on two dates with a beautiful woman who I am able to be myself around, and hopefully many more to come.


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## rabidfoxes (Apr 17, 2016)

I got organising a housewarming party. Now that I'm halfway through I both regret having started this and keen to have it happen. Entertaining is not something I'm great at or keen to do, plus you throw in a bunch of people with their own issues and anxieties in the mix, and how it's gonna go is anyone's guess...

Today I intend to call my optometrist. I don't like speaking on the phone to strangers and have been putting this off for a week now.


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