# How do we build a social circle of friends?



## CompanionLess (Jan 1, 2011)

Anyone has any thoughts, websites, books to share on:
How to have more friends? 

Anyone that got over this situation will be great to share experience


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## sherbert (Jun 24, 2005)

I have a small social circle of friends.

It required me to get reacquainted with an old friend and to 'step up' the relationships with the others. One thing that I do is make a conscious effort to go to invited events (no excuses). I have initiated quite a few hang-out sessions as well. Although I still feel 'out of the loop' with these people, it is certainly better than being alone all of the time. 

If you expect other people to initiate a friendship; you'll be left waiting. Like they say, "be the change that you want to see.."


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## Paragon (Apr 13, 2010)

Not sure yet, but i'm trying. If i manage it i'll post how i did it somewhere on here for sure


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## mixtape (Dec 18, 2010)

Never had a circle of friends. I might have had an arc, at one time. Now I dont have enough to make a line.


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## sherbert (Jun 24, 2005)

mixtape said:


> Never had a circle of friends. I might have had an arc, at one time. Now I dont have enough to make a line.


LOL, cute. 
Maybe you could broaden your definition of what a friend is. I know that in years past, I held the word 'friend' in such high regard that it limited my options. I have friends at work, only one of which I have pursued further. It's about finding a toe-hold, common ground that you are able to build upon. Often people will give you subtle cues that they're interested in spending time with you. For instance: they talk about a movie that they would really like to see. The obvious solution to this would be to offer to see the movie with them.


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## CompanionLess (Jan 1, 2011)

hey sherbert those are some good tips thanks...


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## shynesshellasucks (May 10, 2008)

I like this site: http://succeedsocially.com/index.html.


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## mixtape (Dec 18, 2010)

shynesshellasucks said:


> I like this site: http://succeedsocially.com/index.html.


Good site. I've tried much of this at various times in the past. Wish I could report succes but then I wouldn't be here....my natural tendencies are very strong and in complete and total opposite of being social. But I encourage others to make the effort.


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## CompanionLess (Jan 1, 2011)

shynesshellasucks said:


> I like this site: http://succeedsocially.com/index.html.


Thanks man, this seems like a great site, I'll be sure to checking it out more fully


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## greamelexon (Jan 31, 2011)

If you have 4 people in a group, one person talks and three listen to the listener to have the power to kill a conversation. Assume that people are super interested in you, even if you do not seem to be interested. If you really assume that people are interested in you, your body language starts subcommunicate some tips to help people pay attention to you.


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## fictionz (Nov 18, 2006)

Working on this. But they say you also have to show interest in the other person you're talking to: be a listener. I guess the interest should be mutual between the 2 sides. Take interest in what the other person is saying, and also show that you too are interested in keeping the communication going, so that from this you can keep the conversation going and eventually, make a friend.

Eh, hope that doesn't sound too much like a communication skill tip. Or maybe it does. Just saying what's on my mind. Hope to read more of what's been suggested by others.


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## sherbert (Jun 24, 2005)

These are really great tips. It looks like I'm already incorporating quite a few of them too!


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## Livvle (Nov 10, 2010)

mixtape said:


> Never had a circle of friends. I might have had an arc, at one time. Now I dont have enough to make a line.


I like that =] hehe

I struggle so I'm open to tips. I think my problem is not having the patience to get through all the small talk before you actually find a common ground with someone. Plus I'm really sensitive so I get upset easily which puts people off ;


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## softshock11 (Jan 9, 2011)

online social networks only make me feel more lonely.
but you can find people who have the same interests as you in blogs.. i like using www.tumblr.com i find people who like the same things i do all the time - but its hard because they're not always local


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## Camelleone (Feb 3, 2011)

I don't really have a circle of friends too, but I really want have one.
now I just have 1 or 2 friends from former university who's still contacting me.
when I get really bored at weekend because had no plan, I text my friend ask what she's doing and can I joined? sometimes she respond.. but I just once hang out with my friend's friend, and still have'nt got any invitation yet. 
while at my workplace I just can't have friends, most of them are very sociable, or have married.

Do you guys all want to have a circle of friends or is it okay just have 1 close friend?


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