# Eye contact: improved?



## Cub (Jul 9, 2011)

So when I met my boyfriend, as with any other human being, I could literally not hold direct eye contact with him beyond two seconds. Seriously. It was terribly annoying and I told him it would probably take a long while before I would get over it.

Anyway, so we did a little... experiment. He closed his eyes and just let me look at his face and eyes, for about 5-10 minutes. Then at one point he opened his eyes and did everything but make direct eye contact with me; he just looked at me, my bod, my face, anything away from the eyes. 

Finally we eventually just held eye contact. And the wonderful thing... it was so easy, It was as if twenty minutes ago had never happened: ever after I can maintain direct eye contact with him and it's no problem at all.

In fact, I am finding it now even simpler and easier to maintain eye contact with other people, strangers and friends inclusive. It's so awesome and invigoratingly helpful! [=


Anyone else had similar experiences with improving direct eye contact?


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## kkanne20 (Feb 17, 2012)

that sounds like an awesome trick! I'm going to try it...


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## Cub (Jul 9, 2011)

^ Hope it helps! <3


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## Idris (Oct 17, 2009)

I think I'm improving but very slowly. It's still a concious effort for me to make eye contact when interacting with people. At the moment I think I find it harder to make eye contact when speaking (it's easier if I'm listening to the person).

With time I am finding I'm becomming a bit more aware that I'm supposed to use my eyes when trying to interact with people.

It would be really nice if this was just habitual and automatic for me (it does feel like good eye contact, and body language, would assist with my social issues in a big way).


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## CheesePlease (Feb 12, 2012)

I think it's sweet he helped you get better with it! 

I've been trying to have better eye contact myself. Like Idris, I can hold eye contact while listening but while talking is a little harder. Sometimes I just do it and realize that the other person may be just as uncomfortable as I was! That's when I realized eye contact really isn't so bad.


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## Cub (Jul 9, 2011)

Haha, I have that same problem. Listening is when eye contact is easiest. Speaking whilst making it is quite difficult, as it becomes difficult to concentrate for me. 

Practice practice I s'pose!


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## Toppington (Oct 26, 2011)

I'll have to try this if I ever meet someone patient enough to try it. Congrats, TC! :clap


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## Kingofallmedia (Feb 16, 2012)

If eye contact is what you want, then congrats. I'd personally rather not to look at other human being. There's something about most folks I find irrittating. Their mere presence in a room is enough to put me in a bad mood, and if someone starts eyeballing me...it'll be either fight or flight.


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

I have improved my eye contact that much its 2nd nature.


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

I haven't done any real therapy with it, but ever since I've been eating better and working out my whole mental state has changed, along with it some improvements in eye contact. I'm not perfect by any means but am slowly improving.


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