# Can't call my dad "Dad"



## Kinable (Apr 25, 2013)

Ever since I can remember I never called my dad "dad". Back when I was very young like 1-2 years old I would just say "hey" to get his attention and he got mad and told me to call him dad but I never could. I hit a mental barrier and I literally and physically cannot say the word "dad" around him, even to save my life. Now I just say what I have to say without addressing him. He is one of the main causes of my depression and anxiety. He is just very disappointed in me and I can tell he wants another son other than me because when we went to Mexico one time my cousin was with me and my dad when we were out and about and my dad was treating him like the son he never had but always wanted. Later in the day when we got home I overheard him tell my uncle that my cousin was like a son to him and made me feel very under appreciated. My dad is one of those kind of strict parents and when he gets mad he gets MAD. I did very poorly in school thanks to my SA, procrastination, and dyslexia. After every parent-teacher conference he would beat me yelling at me telling me how useless I am. I'd cry to the point of losing air, it felt like torture. This happened after every parent-teacher conference which was twice a year. He doesn't hit me anymore but he still makes me feel bad by saying I'm pathetic that I don't like parties, socializing, don't have a girlfriend yet, don't even try to get a licence because my SA gets the better of me while driving, and I lack physical skill. He doesn't believe in mental disorders like people who are addicted to stuff and depression. I was watching Freaky Eaters and he watched it for a short time and said that it was BS how people don't just quit their addiction and depressed people are over exaggerating. I haven't told him I have SA because he won't believe me and say it's just shyness and all in my head. I can call my mom "mom" and she is who I turn to after my dad makes me feel like ****. I actually almost ran away one time but came back because I don't want to make the rest of my family sad. It was right before a parent teacher conference and I wanted to run away to avoid it all. Literally I just can't even say the word "dad" around him it's like impossible and I doubt he will ever hear me say that.


2018 Update: I had deleted this thread but decided to bring it back up. I made it in my late teen years and although I don't hate my dad now that I'm an adult, I still stand by everything I said here.


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## girlyone1 (Jan 20, 2012)

Wow this really makes me want to cry. Sounds like he doesn't deserve to be called dad. Its really sad because he doesn't know that he is probably adding to the problems you have. What the parents that act like this don't understand is sometimes the things they say can be very hurtful and discouraging. You should talk to your mom about him and just be honest, or you should just be honest with him. No one deserves to be treated the way he is treating you, sounds like he has problems of his own he needs to sort out. I really hope everything works out for you.


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## fm5827 (Mar 7, 2011)

I'm sorry you have to go through that man, I also don't really call my dad "dad" either. Now that I think about it whenever I ask my mum or sister about him, I always refer to him as "him" or "he". I've never really had much of an emotional connection with him, even though he hasn't been a really bad father. The only thing I really connect with him on, is talking sports.


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## justlistening (Dec 4, 2006)

Very sorry to hear all that.

I never called my dad 'dad' as far as I remember, I also just said 'hey' the couple of times a year I crossed him. Same with my mom who I call by her name, but I never avoided her.

I guess mom and dad have always sounded too affectionate to me. Just can't do it.


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