# Which parent would u rather die 1st ?



## HanSolo (Jul 5, 2013)

I speak very little to my parents and find it very very depressing being around them, even tho they helped me in lots of ways and were always good providers. But I hate them in ways, especially my mom. I don't deserve the good they did for me, but I can't forget the negatives that came from them 'raising' me into such a useless man.

But I would rather my step-dad die 1st. I have even less connection to him, and imagining going to visit him when he's old, and my mom is dead, just seems even weirder and faker.


Also I hope they die quick, I don't want to be going to the hospital to sit at their bedside and not want to be there.

And yes at this rate I will die alone, friendless, loveless...............so I hope I die suddenly too


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## Teflondon (Dec 5, 2014)

I don't particularly get on with my parents but I respect them well enough for trying to raise me as best they could. I certainly don't wish death upon either of them any time soon, but then again I haven't lived at home since I was 18 so they don't bug me as much as they might otherwise do. Plus their deaths would be pointless since I'm not getting an inheritance - in fact I'm pretty sure I'll be paying for their caskets so I'm in no hurry for them to kick the bucket. :lol


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*Mum & Brother died*

Brother was my favourite person in the family. We had common interests. My brothers were 30 years older

Dad's good to me but is a bit sad alone.

All spouses and nieces of both brothers all hate me. They send birthday and Xmas cards. I wish they didn't. Remaining brother is alone from two divorces and one unmarried spouse split. Brother keeps me away from his family. Facebook link lost. I was fascinated by their progress.


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## HanSolo (Jul 5, 2013)

Honestly I wish I was living far far away from them, if either of them ends up in hospital. Thats 1 cold thing to say, and I regret not being friends with my deceased grandparents despite all they did for me too.

My parents will have enough friends and other family to ease their passing without me being around.


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## Dre12 (Jul 25, 2014)

karenw said:


> Admiring this thread title....


Classic Solo TBF.


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## HanSolo (Jul 5, 2013)

thanks


U know, my parents are the only people that care about me tho. But that just adds to my depression, since no girls care about me, and my parents share a lot of blame for that.

I blame myself a ton too and hate myself too.....but


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## tonyhd71 (Jul 27, 2014)

My dad. I don't have a father-son connection with him at all. I have no happy memories with him beyond age 3-4. 

I recognize that everything he did was with his best intentions, but he's a terrible father because he's bad at being one. He doesn't know how to raise kids. Me being on this website is proof of that. His actions were for the best intentions but he failed at being a parent. It might not have been his intentions, but he ruined me. He destroyed whatever potential I ever had. I will never live the life that I want now because of how I was raised and how it shaped me into becoming the anxious useless person that I am. 

Moving out of the house will accomplish nothing, the damage has already been done. My dad had good intentions, but his actions were bad and he ruined my life. I will never forgive him for that. 

If my mom were to die first, I would probably permanently cut contact with my dad now that he wouldn't be living with my mom. There would be no reason for me to ever visit him. 

Its sad that it had to turn out this way. He should've never had kids, he doesn't know how to be a proper father. Because of his bad parenting habits now I have to live with the consequences for the rest of my life.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

Sad as hell but "mum".

Dad went years back before I was born.

My mum is literally dying but she is a total *****. You know how families stick up for their own descendants? 

Well nope, not with her. She accuses me of everything. Tells people i'm lazy (even though I have told her i'm going through depression/SA), even told me I look like a drug addict.

When I try and explain to her the facts she tells me "I dont know" and "I don't care". However, has and still does tell me to my face when I ask why she is saying all that about me, replies with "Because you are my son and you deserve it".

My girlfriend wont even step foot inside my house because of this and what she has witnessed.


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## Batcat (Nov 19, 2014)

I hope I die before they do. Like in an car accident or something then I wouldn't be such a burden.


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## kageri (Oct 2, 2014)

Odds are I will never see my father again. He has extreme social anxiety and depression. I hear he's taken a big turn for the worst to the point my stepmom can hardly stand living with him. He doesn't make any effort to contact us and he's 3 states away. Unless there is one of the rare family gatherings on that side I probably won't see him until his funeral and likely won't even talk to him. I've mostly broken off from my mom's family because she has always been a source of stress. Really it doesn't matter too much. My mom's death would effect my life more but everything is in my mom's name, separate of the marriage, and left to my sister and me. I would not be expected to ever see my stepfather.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

This thread is disgusting.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

ur mom


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## scooby (Jun 24, 2009)

Top notch thread idea here...

As for the poll, I don't need to choose.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Bringing the best out of sas members. Feel the love.


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## Vilanelle (Jul 22, 2013)

dad but i would NEVER want that.


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## Whatev (Feb 6, 2012)

Cold.


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## 0blank0 (Sep 22, 2014)

Omg i wonder how many these parents would feel reading this D:


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

felicshagrace said:


> Omg i wonder how many these parents would feel reading this D:


Well if their kids don't have nice things to say about them, then the parents probably brought it upon themselves.


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## 0blank0 (Sep 22, 2014)

apx24 said:


> Well if their kids don't have nice things to say about them, then the parents probably brought it upon themselves.


Not necessarily..i mean yea some but most kids as they get into the teenage years will get annoyed by their parents, which is natural.

My mother has loved me unconditionally/forgiven me through some of the insane stupid **** I've done...so, why can't i do the same.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

To be fair, regarding the "disgusted" people... it all depends what the scenario is.

Nobody should wish death on anyone however some parents can be terrible role models, nasty and unfit to be a parent.

Sadly that reflects on their children and many can grow up with depression, even develop social anxiety because of the way they have been treated.

For many this question is no different to asking "which bully would you rather die first?" and how many people here have said they wish all bullies would just die/have the same suffering they put people through?


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## AmandaMarie87 (Apr 24, 2013)

Under normal circumstances, I'd say it wouldn't make a difference but, say in a survival scenario, I'd rather save my dad because he's in better health than my mom and would be more likely to get us out alive.


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## meandernorth (Nov 12, 2014)

Ouch. This would be a harsh thread but ESPECIALLY around the holidays. Wow.


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

Why can't people stomach the fact that some people hate their parents? Why are we obliged to love them?

I personally don't hate mine, but can understand why others do.


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## ilsr (Aug 29, 2010)

Why think about it so young? Most people in this thread are younger than 35. When you get that age or older you worry for them and realize life is so short and quickly defines a failure life or not.


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## 7th.Streeter (May 11, 2011)

apx24 said:


> Why can't people stomach the fact that some people hate their parents? Why are we obliged to love them?
> 
> *I personally don't hate mine, but can understand why others do.*


Right! if my parents physically/sexually abused me..or allowed it to happen...

then Im obviously not gonna like them...

However thats not the case w/ me ...

but like you if someone hates their parents for that reason I understand
why.


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## 7th.Streeter (May 11, 2011)

tonyhd71 said:


> *My dad. I don't have a father-son connection with him at all. I have no happy memories with him beyond age 3-4. *
> 
> *I recognize that everything he did was with his best intentions, but he's a terrible father because he's bad at being one*.* He doesn't know how to raise kids.*
> 
> *He should've never had kids, he doesn't know how to be a proper father. Because of his bad parenting habits now I have to live with the consequences for the rest of m*y life.


Although I've forgiven my dad for the way he treated me in the past; calling me stupid, making fun of me ect...

Like Tony said.. my dad was never really a dad through out my childhood

he never got me or any of my brothers a christmas gift..or a birthday gift... I could understand missing a year or two..

but this was throughout my..well our childhood. (he had so much time to do stuff with us..to do things with us...but he just didn't)

My mom was always the bread winner.... she always went out for us..with gifts and whatnot...she was the only one who really cared..

the only thing he did was just aggravate everyone by picking on them and pointing out their flaws(my mom,me,my brothers) b/c he was miserable and unaccomplished...

Even now ,2014, he has no job,... he only talks about a pipe dream...Im like if you gonna do something .freakin' do it... all he does is talk and thinks jobs like security(which he has exp in) are beneath him...

and when me and my mom go to work and see him just laying there... it angers me.. well us.. b/c its like the family he created is taking care of itself >.>

and its not like he does stuff at home.. if its a mess before me and my mom leave ..best believe, it will still be a mess when we get back -_____- 
asking him to do simple things like; go to store.. he moans and complains abt.... when he usually brings me along to go inside while he sits in the car..

My dad was just not responsible at all .....

he is just one of those people who shouldn't have had kids...

All the weight just fell on my mom.. and its not fair at all

Out of all his brothers , not only is he the oldest.... but unsuccessful...
my uncle works for the CDC... the other is a teacher at a university..

>.____>

BUT with all that said...... even though my dad is irresponsible... it could have been worse... I thank God I wasn't abused physically or sexually or anyother way ....

so its not all bad..

just annoying...

but I still love my dad...

and I don't care, how bad it is.... when I hated my dad..

if something bad happened to him..

my heart would race.. ..


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

Daddy goes first. Merry christmas.



diamondheart89 said:


> ur mom


I chuckled a bit.


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