# Is my height a deal-breaker for girls?



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

I know that there had been several threads on this forum about height. I have a deep anxiety about my height and ever finding a relationship. I am 5'3, which is way bellow the average. Now, I know women dont like short guys like me. I am not talking about 5'6, that would be ok, but for me, I dont think I have any chance. Now, that limits my dating pool. I don't mind going for shorter girls or girls with the same height, but even some girls who are 5'3 wouldn't date a guy like me, they want tall dudes. When it comes to female heights, I am going for 5' to 5'6. 5'7 to 5'8 is a miracle for me, only if the girl is interested, which i believe she won't be.

Sometimes it gets me so depressed that I feel like I shoudn't even been born, and my genes are polluted. I have never kissed a girl yet, or had a girlfriend. All I want in my life is to find a girl who will love, and be willing to spend her life with me. She doesnt have to be pretty. I want a woman who will be my friend, lover and my wife. So, is my height a deal-breaker for girls? Will I have to stay single and virgin for all my life? I am 21 now, and I feel things will stay the same way forever.


----------



## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

For some girls it is a deal breaker, but not all. There are plenty of types out there.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

sarafinanickelbocker said:


> For some girls it is a deal breaker, but not all. There are plenty of types out there.


I am really anxious of approaching women on the street, who I find attractive. I have expressed my feelings to girls before and they were my classmates, they all rejected me cuz they had boyfreinds.


----------



## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

I would say to keep trying until you find someone who isn't attached (whether real or made up). Uhm, social anxiety tends to rub people the wrong way too. But yeah, keep trying.

Just remember:









You think you're good enough, it helps others think you're good enough somehow.


----------



## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

No, it's not a deal-breaker.

I see plenty of guys on my campus that are short and they're with cute girls. Hell, one of my friends is 5'1 and has much better luck with women than I do, and I'm 6'3.


----------



## sorrwel (May 20, 2012)

Lol. I'm dating a guy who's like 5'4. I'm intensely attracted to a 5'2 man. I <3 short men.


----------



## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

I've actually seen some women on this site say that their max height is 5'7 They prefer the shorter stockier guys.


----------



## sorrwel (May 20, 2012)

arnie said:


> I've actually seen some women on this site say that their max height is 5'7 They prefer the shorter stockier guys.


Yep. I'm usually into the 5'2-5'7 men. Every woman has different preferences, OP. I'm sure you'll find a girl who's very attracted to you.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

arnie said:


> I've actually seen some women on this site say that their max height is 5'7 They prefer the shorter stockier guys.


But 5'7 isnt short, thats normal. I am like wayy below that.


----------



## peacelovemusic (Apr 13, 2012)

NO. I don't understand many women's obsession with height!!


----------



## mooncake (Jan 29, 2008)

For some, no doubt, although it seems shallow. Personally I couldn't give a damn about a guy's height... I'd be more concerned about whether our personalities clicked. I'm around 5'7" if that's of any relevance.


----------



## Nexus777 (Dec 1, 2012)

No, it is a general rumor that girls prefer larger guys, but I think (guess) there are more important things for them. Cause I am quite large (1,90 to be exact)


----------



## TryingMara (Mar 25, 2012)

Not a deal breaker for me, I'm 5'7". Like arnie said, I tend to be more attracted to shorter, stockier guys. I just feel I have even less of a chance being with them, since many guys feel uncomfortable dating taller girls.


----------



## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

I prefer taller men, but the height of him would never be a deal breaker or "maker."


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

TryingMara said:


> Not a deal breaker for me, I'm 5'7". Like arnie said, I tend to be more attracted to shorter, stockier guys. * I just feel I have even less of a chance being with them, since many guys feel uncomfortable dating taller girls*.


Hmm... Interesting. Its quite the opposite with me, bc I think I don't have a chance being with girls at your height, cuz I feel they would look down on me, like I am not good enough for them. But, in my case, I am not uncomfortable dating tall girls, but I am extremely anxious of approaching them in public, and feel that they might be laughing at me in their head. For some reason, I feel that she would be more appreciating, and tolerating, and accepting if some taller than her approached her during the day.


----------



## awkwardsilent (Jun 14, 2012)

Deal Breaker no? Make is easier for you? No... I'd have to really really really like a guy to make it work because I am 6 feet tall. I feel like a giant mt of the time (i'm fat too not just tall) I've liked shorter guys (I think 5'2") in the past but I guess in general most of my crushes have been average to tall (as in around my height).


----------



## TryingMara (Mar 25, 2012)

lightningstorm said:


> Hmm... Interesting. Its quite the opposite with me, bc I think I don't have a chance being with girls at your height, cuz I feel they would look down on me, like I am not good enough for them. But, in my case, I am not uncomfortable dating tall girls, but I am extremely anxious of approaching them in public, and feel that they might be laughing at me in their head. For some reason, I feel that she would be more appreciating, and tolerating, and accepting if some taller than her approached her during the day.


I've seen some girls write on here that they go for taller guys because it makes them feel feminine and protected. I can honestly say, that the only time I've ever felt that way with another human being, was with a guy who was 5'4". To me, it all depends on the person and how they treat me.

Friends of mine have had height preferences for dating partners, but I've seen them time and time again fall for guys who did not meet their "requirements", but they found them amazing in other ways.


----------



## crimsoncora (Mar 29, 2011)

I will be honest, yes height is a deal breaker for women. I personally can't date a guy shorter than me, am 5'8. But I will settle for 5'6 or 5'7. It has something to do with masculinity and fact you want to feel like your guy can protect you and leaning up to kiss him. 

But there are alot of women I know who date short men and marry them, but I am foriegn and most foriegn women I know have married to short men. So quite possibly you have to start broadening your options beyond American women. I can gaurantee you will find a girl.


----------



## Tangerine (Feb 16, 2010)

TryingMara said:


> I've seen some girls write on here that they go for taller guys because it makes them feel feminine and protected. I can honestly say, that the only time I've ever felt that way with another human being, was with a guy who was 5'4". To me, it all depends on the person and how they treat me.
> 
> Friends of mine have had height preferences for dating partners, but I've seen them time and time again fall for guys who did not meet their "requirements", but they found them amazing in other ways.


Totally agree with you. 'Masculinity' isn't height or physically based. The 5'4 man I'm dating now has definitely made me feel the most 'safe, protected and so on' than previous partners (who had more traditionally-thought masculine traits and I didn't see them that way at all). 
Also, I hope no one gets the idea that women are little sheeps and that men need to be "manly men," or something.

I kind of find the height thing ridiculous. My sister once gave a shorter man a "chance," but decided after-all that his height was a deal breaker, and broke up with him, even though he was a great guy she had fun with. Terrible. There are women like this, and it sucks, but there's also tons of women who would have no qualms about dating a shorter male, such as myself.

I think it's true that some people just can't be attracted to someone shorter than them, in the same way that some people can't be attracted to other features. At the same time, most people see attraction as far too concrete and unchanging. I would say most of the time attraction can be taught, and just takes an open mind; thought not in all cases.


----------



## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

I do like guys being taller than me, I'm not gonna lie - I think it's because of the protection thing - but I would totally absolutely date a shorter guy. I'm had a crush on a guy about 5'4" before. You can't help your height, so I don't think it's fair to judge someone because of it. 

So if the guy I end up liking is taller then me, okay yeah it's a bonus, but it's not a dealbreaker by any means. I'm 5'9", by the way.


----------



## evginmubutu (Sep 12, 2011)

It's funny, because I'm 6'1 but I am never really thankful for this. Everyone has their insecurities and mine are elsewhere. It just so happens I've been blessed with a good height and I never really think about this, only the things that I'm not happy with. 

I think yeah, in general women like taller men but just as you've read in this thread there are many exceptions. I prefer short women but if a 6 foot gal came along that was smart and beautiful it kind of trumps those things which you normally find sexy.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

Perfectionist said:


> I do like guys being taller than me, I'm not gonna lie - *I think it's because of the protection thing* - but I would totally absolutely date a shorter guy. I'm had a crush on a guy about 5'4" before. You can't help your height, so I don't think it's fair to judge someone because of it.
> 
> So if the guy I end up liking is taller then me, okay yeah it's a bonus, but it's not a dealbreaker by any means. I'm 5'9", by the way.


Yah, I have heard about the protection thing before. Women naturally seek taller & bigger guys for protection, due to evolutionary purposes. But I don't see why it would matter in our modern civilized world; no one is attacking us when we are in the public.


----------



## Anonymous NYC (Apr 14, 2012)

No way man, us short guys are in high demand :lol

https://twitter.com/expsnghghtsm

No but seriously I think women are self conscious of what may people think if she were to be seen out in public with a shorter guy. What her friends and family may say. 
https://twitter.com/expsnghghtsm


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

Anonymous NYC said:


> No way man, us short guys are in high demand :lol
> 
> *https://twitter.com/expsnghghtsm
> *
> No but seriously I think women are self conscious of what may people think if she were to be seen out in public with a shorter guy. What her friends and family may say.


What the heck was that? That site is full of hateful language, and they're really enjoying themselves saying those.


----------



## vanishingpt (Mar 9, 2012)

Yeah I think it's much more common to see shorter women and taller men in relationships but that doesn't mean all girls are going to reject you and that your genes are polluted. I've seen some shorter guys with very tall women, and to be honest, if you really love being around the person and they have all the qualities you're looking for, the height won't really matter so much.

Why reject an amazing person just because they're not the right height? If you want a shorter girl, I'm sure there's some amazing ones out there  just don't be so down on yourself. Girls will pick that up and they might not want to be around you or open up.


----------



## Lelsey (Feb 7, 2011)

Move to Asia.. there are plenty of women under 5'3" here... j/k
But all in all, i'm short so i cant say much about height issue here sorry, can't help much..


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

I saw a girl wallking on the street, asssuming her height is 5'7, and she looked really cute, but I couldn't apporach her bc of my anxiety. In my head I was always having these thoughts, "What if she keeps on laughing at me?" "What if she thinks is this a joke, and not take me seriously?" "What if she treats me as her kid brother?" What should I do?


----------



## creasy (Oct 29, 2012)

I know a guy who's 5'4" and married. He's actually an inch shorter than his wife. He's pretty confident, doesn't seem to let his height bother him. 

My stepbrother is 5'8" or so and been with quite a few girls. Has he been turned down because of his height before? Yeah. Didn't let it stop him though. And believe it or not he's actually pretty shy to boot. 

Honestly a lot of girls will be turned off by your height. But not all of them and the only way you'll find those girls is to play the field. No one is doomed to remain a virgin or single the rest of their lives based on their appearance.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

creasy said:


> *Honestly a lot of girls will be turned off by your height. *But not all of them and the only way you'll find those girls is to play the field. No one is doomed to remain a virgin or single the rest of their lives based on their appearance.


See thats the thing, I keep on thinking how turned off they might be and think that I am some worthless crap, trying to see if he has a chance with her. I can't help myself stop thinking like that, and that intimidates me even to lift a finger and do anything.


----------



## creasy (Oct 29, 2012)

lightningstorm said:


> See thats the thing, I keep on thinking how turned off they might be and think that I am some worthless crap, trying to see if he has a chance with her. I can't help myself stop thinking like that, and that intimidates me even to lift a finger and do anything.


Some of them might. Some of them might think you're worthless crap because you ignore them or never make a move. Some will think you're worthless no matter what you do and some will never consider you worthless for any reason.

The only thing that matters is what you consider yourself to be. Now you can let somebody's judgement get in your head and influence you or you can accept that they see things a different way and you disagree.

Even though I don't know you I can say almost certainly that you're not worthless since you have to capacity to perform work and make people feel good and loved and be made to feel good and loved in return.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Do you have anything going for you to make up for being short? Where do you live? Are your parents short too?

You might need a good job to make up for it.

http://mjperry.blogspot.com/2010/02/height-matters-income-vs-height-trade.html



> For example, the study showed a 5-foot-9-inch man needs to make $30,000 more than a 5-foot-10-inch one to be as successful in the dating pool."


----------



## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

This may seem like it doesn't answer your question directly, but, how may girls have you approached/talked to and tried to move things forward romantically? I think this is an important thing to know.


----------



## LeftyFretz (Feb 12, 2011)

I'm 5'2 and I've never dated a girl shorter than me.


----------



## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

komorikun said:


> Do you have anything going for you to make up for being short? Where do you live? Are your parents short too?
> 
> You might need a good job to make up for it.
> 
> http://mjperry.blogspot.com/2010/02/height-matters-income-vs-height-trade.html


I can understand for marriage purposes or child bearing purposes why money would be important for women, but I don't really get how $30,000 extra is gonna make the man more "sexy". But maybe this isn't even about sexual appeal (obviously it isn't). What's some women's take on this? I don't think money makes that much a difference unless the chick wanted to live a certain lifestyle. I think money only makes a difference if the man can't support means to survive somewhat normally.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

komorikun said:


> Do you have anything going for you to make up for being short? Where do you live? Are your parents short too?
> 
> You might need a good job to make up for it.
> 
> http://mjperry.blogspot.com/2010/02/height-matters-income-vs-height-trade.html


I dont want a money grubber in my life. I would be far better off living a single guy than being with a woman who only wants to me for my money and sleep with someone else.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

bwidger85 said:


> I can understand for marriage purposes or child bearing purposes why money would be important for women, but I don't really get how $30,000 extra is gonna make the man more "sexy". But maybe this isn't even about sexual appeal (obviously it isn't). What's some women's take on this? I don't think money makes that much a difference unless the chick wanted to live a certain lifestyle. I think money only makes a difference if the man can't support means to survive somewhat normally.


I know that I can't date models or get trophy wives, and honestly I have no such desires. All I want is a decent normal wife, who doesn't care about how much money I make.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

LeftyFretz said:


> I'm 5'2 and I've never dated a girl shorter than me.


Whats your secret? How did you approach them in public? Were you ever intimidated or anxious approaching a taller girl, lets say 5'7?


----------



## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

peacelovemusic said:


> NO. I don't understand many women's obsession with height!!


Part of that preference is genetic. But I think a good chunk of it is actually sociocultural. Europe is not height-obsessed to the degree that North America is (North American CEOs are disproportionately tall whereas this isn't the case in Europe for eg). European women are more open-minded about height. And from what I hear, more open-minded in general. The preference for height in men is universal. But there is variance between cultures to the degree of preference. Humans have a reptilian hindbrain that is just pure animalistic instinct (the taller cavemen were better able to protect their women, hence the genetic preference) but we also have a little thing called a forebrain, which governs logic, reason, morality, etc. It's a cop out to say that we are merely slaves to our caveman heritage.


----------



## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

lightningstorm said:


> Whats your secret? How did you approach them in public? Were you ever intimidated or anxious approaching a taller girl, lets say 5'7?


Everyone is intimidated at some point, but even if you're 6 feet you're not going to meet someone staying at home and not socializing. Approach more and after 50 or so approaches then you have a better reason to question these things in my opinion.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

bwidger85 said:


> Everyone is intimidated at some point, but even if your 6 feet your not going to meet someone staying at home and not socializing. Approach more and after 50 or so approaches then you have a better reason to question these things in my opinion.


Ok, I will approach women who a few inches taller than me and see how it goes. But, in general I will keep a record of my approaches to all women and evaluate their perceptions.


----------



## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

lightningstorm said:


> Ok, I will approach women who a few inches taller than me and see how it goes. But, in general I will keep a record of my approaches to all women and evaluate their perceptions.


It sounds like I harp always saying "approach! approach! approach!" but even people who are deemed good looking by most significantly drop their chances by not going out and socializing. For other people it is a necessity they approach. We also need to prove to ourselves things instead of assume all the time. GL


----------



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Height queens, as they call them, are to avoid at all costs.

If being slightly taller than her isn't enough, it is a HUGE red flag. It means she is attracted to a man's social standing. It means she cares about how others view her and her SO.

Now, status queens (word I just made up) are very unstable in love. They will always look for "better", for a more socially dominant man and are likely to cheat on their BF with a guy in a band or **** like that.

DO NOT TRUST THEM.


----------



## Zeeshan (Sep 4, 2011)

lightningstorm said:


> But 5'7 isnt short, thats normal. I am like wayy below that.


that makes me feel great


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

lightningstorm said:


> I dont want a money grubber in my life. I would be far better off living a single guy than being with a woman who only wants to me for my money and sleep with someone else.


Probably 90% of women do care to some extent.


----------



## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

komorikun said:


> Probably 90% of women do care to some extent.


why?


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

TPower said:


> Height queens, as they call them, are to avoid at all costs.
> 
> If being slightly taller than her isn't enough, it is a HUGE red flag. It means she is attracted to a man's social standing. It means she cares about how others view her and her SO.


 Ok, now I know what not to go for.



TPower said:


> Now, status queens (word I just made up) are very unstable in love. They will always look for "better", for a more socially dominant man and are likely to cheat on their BF with a guy in a band or **** like that.
> DO NOT TRUST THEM.


This even made my anxeity of being with a woman go up. Are there any normal woman who doesnt have these superficial requirements? I feel we are still trapped in our backwarded way of thinking. I dont even have any high requirements for women.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

komorikun said:


> Probably 90% of women do care to some extent.


Looks like I am doomed for life. 


Zeeshan said:


> that makes me feel great


Yah you will get all the girls in your life.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

bwidger85 said:


> why?


Cause most will look at the whole package. And it makes sense. You can't live on love.

how good looking is he?
is he good in bed?
is he easy to get along with?
do we share things/beliefs in common?
is he kind?
does he make me laugh?
does he have a decent, stable job?
could we have a nice lifestyle together ($$$)?

If the guy lacks in one aspect he can make up for that in other aspects. Being short is a big negative in general cause it's not sexy for most women.


----------



## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

komorikun said:


> Cause most will look at the whole package. And it makes sense. You can't live on love.
> 
> how good looking is he?
> is he good in bed?
> ...


that makes sense. but money is one of the last things on my list because most people aren't so poor they can't support themselves or a couple. in a country that is extremely poor then I can totally understand why money would be more of an importance, but not so much in america unless they are dead-set on living a more than comfortable lifestyle. the average income in the U.S. for men like like 40K. Put two people together and that's more than enough unless they expect to be living a grand lifestyle. money matters, but i don't think it matters as much as people think in the States at least unless you are dealing with someone in the poverty level, but most aren't

so kind of what i'm getting at here is if you are considered less than attractive in the States then money probably won't do you too much a difference unless you are really well off. women in the states don't need men's money to be happy. unless someone wants to argue otherwise?


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

komorikun said:


> Cause most will look at the whole package. And it makes sense. You can't live on love.
> 
> how good looking is he?
> is he good in bed?
> ...


Damn, this list even makes everything so complicated. Do I have to all these to get a girl in my life? I have seen so many poor guys having girlfriends and ok lifestyle, sure they aren't rich but they are really happy with their life. To me this feels like I am applying for job and I meet the requirements I will get a girl , otherwise... Why did I have to be so ill-fated?


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

lightningstorm said:


> Looks like I am doomed for life.
> 
> Yah you will get all the girls in your life.


Your height will be a deal breaker for girls who make it one. But why waste your time dwelling on those that might? Everyone has preferences, even you do, I'm sure.

A person's height and weight are the most discriminated against traits. The thing is, weight can be changed for the most part, but you cant shrink or grow taller. We must accept who we are as people, and get in where we fit in. Trying to force yourself in situations where you are basically a square peg in a round hole will never work.

People love to give the great advice of, "Oh, just seek romantic partners your height!!!" The thing about being tall or short is, that even those your height and that are deemed "height compatible" with you might seek taller or shorter partners. But there are plenty of people out there that will surprise you. You just have to try your hardest to seek them out.

Find other ways to stand out from the crowd. Personality, style, goes a long way.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

rdrr said:


> Your height will be a deal breaker for girls who make it one. But why waste your time dwelling on those that might? Everyone has preferences, even you do, I'm sure.
> 
> A person's height and weight are the most discriminated against traits. The thing is, weight can be changed for the most part, but you cant shrink or grow taller. We must accept who we are as people, and get in where we fit in. Trying to force yourself in situations where you are basically a square peg in a round hole will never work.
> 
> ...


I understand what you are saying. But, I don't understand why am I so anxious to approach women on the street. If I was like 5'6 or 5'10, then I wouldn't be posting here at all. I am not scared of women or talking to them. I can talk to girls easily, or start a convo with them in my class. In fact I have seen that I do tend to get well and they talk to me too. But, thinking of approaching a woman who is a little taller than me on the street, just gives me a fever. How do I get over this? How do I break out of my shell and be more confident?


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

If you have low standards yourself then it won't be hard to find a girlfriend. Like if you are okay with women are not so good looking or a bit fat. Or has something about them that most men don't like.

Anyways, I don't know anything about you so this is kind of boring. Need to know age, ethnicity, location, job, education level, etc.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

komorikun said:


> If you have low standards yourself then it won't be hard to find a girlfriend. Like if you are okay with women are not so good looking or a bit fat. Or has something about them that most men don't like.


Oh ok, so just ignore all the good looking girls, and try the unattractive and curvy ones. Thats not a bad idea given my situation that I am not really good enough for any woman, so whoever pities on me, I would just live with that. But, I have met some of those who you speak of, and found out that even they have boyfriends.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Oh. You're the one that doesn't like drugs and alcohol and asked if I lived in the ghetto in that other thread. Why did you change your username?


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

lightningstorm said:


> I understand what you are saying. But, I don't understand why am I so anxious to approach women on the street. If I was like 5'6 or 5'10, then I wouldn't be posting here at all. I am not scared of women or talking to them. I can talk to girls easily, or start a convo with them in my class. In fact I have seen that I do tend to get well and they talk to me too. But, thinking of approaching a woman who is a little taller than me on the street, just gives me a fever. How do I get over this? How do I break out of my shell and be more confident?


You are anxious because you are rejecting yourself before you even approach, because you assume people will act in a certain way because of your height. Fortune-telling is a popular symptom of distorted thinking.

You are approaching a person, with emotions and a personality of their own, not a height. If you are able to converse with someone well, that's all that matters. Sure, they may see your height at first and not be super enthusiastic, but your personality and charm will shine through and make them forget.

Either you can limit yourself by going for those who may be shorter than you, or you can focus on the person themselves you are approaching, and not their height.


----------



## Zeeshan (Sep 4, 2011)

bwidger85 said:


> that makes sense. but money is one of the last things on my list because most people aren't so poor they can't support themselves or a couple. in a country that is extremely poor then I can totally understand why money would be more of an importance, but not so much in america unless they are dead-set on living a more than comfortable lifestyle. the average income in the U.S. for men like like 40K. Put two people together and that's more than enough unless they expect to be living a grand lifestyle. money matters, but i don't think it matters as much as people think in the States at least unless you are dealing with someone in the poverty level, but most aren't
> 
> so kind of what i'm getting at here is if you are considered less than attractive in the States then money probably won't do you too much a difference unless you are really well off. women in the states don't need men's money to be happy. unless someone wants to argue otherwise?


Lol money is not last its prob one of the top ones. Women are unconsciously attracted to wealth


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

rdrr said:


> You are anxious because you are rejecting yourself before you even approach, because you assume people will act in a certain way because of your height. Fortune-telling is a popular symptom of distorted thinking.
> 
> You are approaching *a person, with emotions and a personality* of their own, *not a height. *If you are able to converse with someone well, that's all that matters. Sure, they may see your height at first and not be super enthusiastic, but your personality and charm will shine through and make them forget.
> 
> Either you can limit yourself by going for those who may be shorter than you, or you can focus on the person themselves you are approaching, and not their height.


Hmm... I never thought about it like that. Not to offend anyone, I always assumed that taller girls will be cold, although many tall females gave me some positive advice on this thread. I don't why I have this impression of them. I know that they have emotions too just like smaller ones, but everytime I see a tall girl and she has makeup on, and looks exotic, my mind automatically disqualifies me, and goes "oops, you are out of her league, just walk away." I dont put women on pedestal, but everytime I see a tall beautiful girl, my mind makes several rationalizations like how better looking she is than me, and how a better person she must be compared to me. Why is it so hard for me to believe that tall girls are also humans too and have same feelings like the small ones?


----------



## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Zeeshan said:


> Lol money is not last its prob one of the top ones. Women are unconsciously attracted to wealth


didn't we already have this discussion? for the sake of argument, just discuss this with women in detail and I think it'll save me time. there may be a _higher_ reason that is evolutionarily beneficial for women to want a man with more resources but that also plays contradictory to what many women have already in the states, not including the leagues of other men who can easily support them without being even close to rich by any means. i can smell a debate coming on so maybe i should just stop now though...


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

lightningstorm said:


> Hmm... I never thought about it like that. Not to offend anyone, I always assumed that taller girls will be cold, although many tall females gave me some positive advice on this thread. I don't why I have this impression of them. I know that they have emotions too just like smaller ones, but everytime I see a tall girl and she has makeup on, and looks exotic, my mind automatically disqualifies me, and goes *"oops, you are out of her league, just walk away."* I dont put women on pedestal, but everytime I see a tall beautiful girl, my mind makes several rationalizations like how better looking she is than me, and how a better person she must be compared to me. Why is it so hard for me to believe that tall girls are also humans too and have same feelings like the small ones?


That is putting women on a pedestal, and you on a lower one. Who are these girls anyway, they just might be taller. Find out for yourself if they are in "your league" or better than you. Their responses will give you the answers you are looking for, and at least then, you will know, either they dig you or don't, for any reason.


----------



## Mongoose (Oct 26, 2012)

lightningstorm said:


> Sometimes it gets me so depressed that I feel like I shoudn't even been born, and my genes are polluted. I have never kissed a girl yet, or had a girlfriend. All I want in my life is to find a girl who will love, and be willing to spend her life with me. She doesnt have to be pretty. I want a woman who will be my friend, lover and my wife. So, is my height a deal-breaker for girls? Will I have to stay single and virgin for all my life? I am 21 now, and I feel things will stay the same way forever.


You sound like a really good guy, and I'm not just saying that. Your genes are not "polluted." I became really upset when I read that. You're not going to be single the rest of your life.


----------



## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

rdrr said:


> That is putting women on a pedestal, and you on a lower one. Who are these girls anyway, they just might be taller. Find out for yourself if they are in "your league" or better than you. Their responses will give you the answers you are looking for, and at least then, you will know, either they dig you or don't, for any reason.


These girls are just normal girls I see on the street/campus. Once I accidentally met a really tall girl 6' and we talked while having lunch, and later found out she is in my class. She was older than me, really nice and sweet and we talked for a long time and got along (frienldy) very easily. I never got scared or intimated or anxious talking to her. I talked to her like a normal person. Its actually when I accidentally meet a tall girl its not a big issue, i.e. in class cuz I am not thinking of dating her, just talking to her as classmates, but, once I go on the street and think about approaching women (for romantic interest), then I get so anxious. 


Mongoose said:


> You sound like a really good guy, and I'm not just saying that. Your genes are not "polluted." I became really upset when I read that. You're not going to be single the rest of your life.


Thanks, Sometimes these negative thoughts really bring me down.


----------



## SVIIC (Apr 15, 2005)

Rainbat said:


> No, it's not a deal-breaker.
> 
> I see plenty of guys on my campus that are short and they're with cute girls. Hell, one of my friends is 5'1 and has much better luck with women than I do, and I'm 6'3.


Yeah but like... he probably has... "dat swag" .

It's hard for people who don't have confidence and don't have shallow things like height to make them feel artificially better.

I'm 5' 8" myself. Really wanted to be taller... I guess if you're a bit of a perfectionist (and maybe a lot of us here are), it's hard to be completely happy about something like height.



sorrwel said:


> Yep. I'm usually into the 5'2-5'7 men. Every woman has different preferences, OP. I'm sure you'll find a girl who's very attracted to you.


I think I'd prefer a girlfriend who was like... 5' 7" or 5' 6" or even 5' 8" TBQH all things being equal. I dunno, I never saw the point in a man being far taller than his girlfriend. Not that it's a bad thing or anything, but surely it'd just be easier and whatnot if you were close-ish?
Also implies longer legs :um.

As for heels: pfft. That's cheating anyway. Besides, I think it's sexier when a woman is a reasonable height without any help. Not to mention that she's not completely shallow and impressionable that she thinks she absolutely has to wear heels to look good. Not that there's anything wrong with them either...

Thing is though, a man might dismiss a woman around his height because he might think she wouldn't be interested in a man his size even if he was very attracted to her. So I guess as a result... women might get the idea men don't like women close to their height (which I'm sure some/many don't of course), and cause a vicious cycle.



TryingMara said:


> I just feel I have even less of a chance being with them, since many guys feel uncomfortable dating taller girls.


That's the thing though: Men definitely genuinely assume women want taller men and feel they're out of their league if they seem too short. I'm sure many probably are uncomfortable, but I bet just as many aren't.
But things being the way they are, men aren't likely to feel comfortable approaching a woman the same height they are, and unless she gives him a sign... how is he going to know? It's going to be hard enough without feeling you probably don't have a chance in the first place.

I mean, might be a bit weird if she was 2-3" taller out of heels... but you could get used to that too I suppose :um.



lightningstorm said:


> I think I don't have a chance being with girls at your height, cuz I feel they would look down on me, like I am not good enough for them.


Exactly. Men don't bother with such women because they assume they won't want them (media/society whatever I guess). As such, women see men not going for relatively tall women and assume they're not interested in such women.
It may be entirely on the contrary... I mean I really like the look of a lot of women around my height but as hard as I can imagine it would be to convince a shorter woman to be with me, I'd feel completely inadequate and like I had no chance from the start approaching a woman like that.



evginmubutu said:


> It's funny, because I'm 6'1 but I am never really thankful for this. Everyone has their insecurities and mine are elsewhere. It just so happens I've been blessed with a good height and I never really think about this, only the things that I'm not happy with.


Heh, too true. I've often thought how I'd jump at the chance to be 5' 10"... but then wonder if I'd be just as unhappy and ungrateful if I'd always been 5' 10" and still wanted more... hmmm. Or I'd be 6' 3" and decide that was too tall for me after all :roll.



lightningstorm said:


> Yah, I have heard about the protection thing before. Women naturally seek taller & bigger guys for protection, due to evolutionary purposes. But I don't see why it would matter in our modern civilized world; no one is attacking us when we are in the public.


Also, it's not like height = strength or fighting ability. I guess that comes from the "bigger muscles = stronger muscles" school.



lightningstorm said:


> What the heck was that? That site is full of hateful language, and they're really enjoying themselves saying those.


If it was exposing hate toward small-breasted women or some such, there would be uproar and calls of misogyny and objectification etc. :roll

TBH, I have to say... it may sound strange coming from a man but this is just me and my own preferences and I guess there are of course exceptions and it wouldn't have to be a dealbreaker BUT while we're on the subject...
I personally don't find short women attractive.
Now, I don't actually mean I don't find women attractive if they are short, but I just don't find shortness an appealing quality in women. I'd seriously draw the line at about 5' 4", in that I'd probably find a height around there and below to be... significantly less appealing than 5' 6" or something.

I dunno, it just seems logical to me: if you want a girlfriend... why not have a LONGER girlfriend? (to a point of course)  At some point and I know I'm one to talk... but if I'm honest it DOES put me off. I don't buy the whole wanting to tower over a woman thing. It does nothing for me.

Again, not being shallow, just speaking about ideals here.

EDIT: Oooh, also ever notice that many women who demand a man to be tall are actually rather small themselves? WTF?!


----------



## SVIIC (Apr 15, 2005)

komorikun said:


> You might need a good job to make up for it.
> 
> http://mjperry.blogspot.com/2010/02/height-matters-income-vs-height-trade.html


In fairness though... why bother?

You're not going to get anything out of a woman like that, I suspect.

Not that there's anything wrong with wanting someone to be successful and all that jazz... but attracting women with money is just asking for trouble.

And I know this... because I am clearly a dating expert.



lightningstorm said:


> I dont want a money grubber in my life. I would be far better off living a single guy than being with a woman who only wants to me for my money and sleep with someone else.


Exactly. WTF is in it for a man to be with such a woman?

Even if we try to boil it down to the most cynical factors: What... 15 years max of sex with a presumably beautiful woman? Bleh, it's hardly worth marriage.



LeftyFretz said:


> I'm 5'2 and I've never dated a girl shorter than me.


TBQH, you're probably just a bawss.

Kinda like how Al Pacino is short, but he still exudes that certain air that means you wouldn't mess with him.



lightningstorm said:


> This even made my anxeity of being with a woman go up. Are there any normal woman who doesnt have these superficial requirements? I feel we are still trapped in our backwarded way of thinking. I dont even have any high requirements for women.


Suppose I have to be honest, in the interest of fairness while wishing taller women would be interested in men my height...

If a woman was say... 5' 2"... I think she'd have to be REALLY REALLY great in other aspects for me to have any real interest. Physically speaking of course.

And at 5' 8", maybe that's shallow/whatever, but I still think if I was 6' 0", I'd be looking more at 5' 9", 5' 10", ya know? That's just the way I feel. Ideally speaking.



lightningstorm said:


> If I was like 5'6 or 5'10, then I wouldn't be posting here at all. I am not scared of women or talking to them.


It's all relative though, man. I've given myself hell over the years for my height... it all depends on what ends up happening in our screwed up over-pressured brains. I just had expectations, I guess. My brother being 6' 0".

Though you're not scared of women so you're about a million miles ahead of me as it is and you're probably right then if you had a bit more of an "advantage". I dunno.


----------



## sorrwel (May 20, 2012)

SVIIC said:


> I think I'd prefer a girlfriend who was like... 5' 7" or 5' 6" or even 5' 8" TBQH all things being equal. I dunno, I never saw the point in a man being far taller than his girlfriend. Not that it's a bad thing or anything, but surely it'd just be easier and whatnot if you were close-ish?
> Also implies longer legs :um.


Yeah. I know a short guy who had a fwb relationship with a 6 foot tall Italian babe. He loved her legs. It's definitely possible. But then again, he has an insane amount of 'swag'.


----------



## SVIIC (Apr 15, 2005)

sorrwel said:


> Yeah. I know a short guy who had a fwb relationship with a 6 foot tall Italian babe. He loved her legs. It's definitely possible. But then again, he has an insane amount of 'swag'.


Ah yes... the fabled "swag" that is so elusive.

Though there's a balance to be had too... a taller woman will have longer legs, but will also probably be skinnier and may have much straighter hips like those anorexic models. Oh noes :afr.

All depends on a case-by-case basis though really... I mean I probably prefer blue eyes if we get into the details, but sometimes you see women with really brown eyes and brown hair (and it MUST be brown hair :yes) that go together so well that it just looks amazing. Om nom nom. Granted, the hair may be dyed in most of these cases... not sure... but it still does something for me.


----------



## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

Not necessarily a deal-breaker, but it does put you at a disadvantage compared to other guys. Women are just more likely to be attracted to taller guys, not much we can do about it.


----------



## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

Well, I prefer taller men (and that's not being shallow) because it's more of a protection thing for me. I saw another post that someone said the same thing. However, I have dated someone who was only a little taller than me and I'm 5'2 . It was fine especially because I cared about him a lot. I didn't really even notice the height factor when I was with him. Even though some girls prefer taller men, it's about the personality as well. Michael J. Fox and Seth Green are only 5'4 and they are adorable!

I have two stories for you about two friend's of mine. The first friend of mine was about my height or maybe even shorter. That didn't keep him from putting himself out there. He went on dating sites and eventually met a woman who really liked him. I'm sure he was always self conscious about his height, but she that didn't matter to her. They are now married and living together. This happened all within the last few years, too. And my other friend, she had met a man (this happened around the age you were) online, and he came out here to see her. He was her height and she's the same height as me. They fell instantly in love and have been married for almost 7 years already. Height doesn't matter for everyone, it's about what you've got inside, and what you are going to offer a woman. 
So please don't get yourself thinking negatively about who you are. Because there is *NOTHING *wrong with who you are. There will be a girl out there who likes you.


----------



## SVIIC (Apr 15, 2005)

callalilly26 said:


> Well, I prefer taller men (and that's not being shallow) because it's more of a protection thing for me.
> ...
> I'm 5'2


I saw a lot of people mentioning that when I googled about it before: I wonder is it more of a short woman thing? In that a lot of the time it seemed the really short women, say 5' 2", were looking for a really tall man like... ****ing 6' 3" or something. Or of course, 6'... "AT LEAST" :um.

The mind genuinely boggles at the mere mechanical practicality of that...

Or, it's just that the short women wanting the tall men stood out because it seemed most dramatic and perhaps almost... hypocritical. And unwarranted high standards. Which may explain why they had to be on dating sites in the first place .

What do you mean exactly though? Taller, as in... taller than average, or just significantly taller than you?

I wonder if a lot of men are into short women? I know some obviously are, but I really don't see the specific appeal for a 6' 2" man to be with a much much shorter woman. Surely it would be physically awkward if nothing else? I dunno.

Definitely think just slightly shorter than me would be my ideal preference, in terms of both attraction and practicality :b.


----------



## Corvus Cowl (Apr 25, 2012)

Height and "package" size for men = Chest and rear size for women.

Everyone has their preferences, and this is just one of many.


----------



## SVIIC (Apr 15, 2005)

Tanya1 said:


> I've dated a guy that was six foot and it was
> honestly awkward, I'd prefer them being a bit more in my height range than that usually.


Yeah, I would've thought so.

Seems like those women who want like... a man an entire foot taller than them (and seem to accept little else) must pretty much have some kind of deep emotional issues going on or something. I mean, when you're ignoring obvious issues of practicality in the name of some sort of fantastic ideal.



Tanya1 said:


> Oh, having read your other posts, you come across to me as someone who actually might have a problem with smaller women? Perhaps because you've come across a lot of shorter women who just happen to like really tall men and you don't consider yourself tall (but at 5 foot 8 I'd say you're fine there...)


Nah, TBH, I haven't come across any women of any kind.

I'm not experienced enough to have any bad experiences with women because I currently have no experiences whatsoever.



Tanya1 said:


> I hope there are men out there lol that like shorter women, since you seem to be questioning why anyone would./


Well it was moreso I don't understand why such short women were going for men so absurdly taller than they were. Then wondering about it from the other direction and thinking that surely a woman 8 or 10 inches shorter than you would cause major inconveniences? And that such a height difference would at least be undesirable and place these women in a difficult situation where it might be more realistic to go for man who was tall IN COMPARISON to them, rather than very tall for a man when they're actually rather short for women.

But also, I do just prefer the reasonably taller sort of women as a personal preference, and while I definitely think I would ideally prefer my ideal sort of woman to be... an inch or so shorter than me if we're talking absolute ideal (well, it would be harder to embrace a woman taller than you I suppose? there are practical considerations dealing with convention at least), I still can't understand the specific appeal for a man to just _tower_ over a woman, as in why that would be specifically brilliant when you're about twice the size she is.

I mean, there are plenty of reasonably short women I find attractive... I just think there's something rather appealing about taller women .


----------



## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

Mainly I love guys who are 5'11-6'3.

It's not really physically awkward, trust me. Haha I could probably start a brand new thread on why it's simply amazing for other reasons.

This has nothing to do with height, but I saw you're from Ireland. 
Your accents are so incredibly hot :/ Okay, I'm going to shut up now.



SVIIC said:


> What do you mean exactly though? Taller, as in... taller than average, or just significantly taller than you?
> 
> I wonder if a lot of men are into short women? I know some obviously are, but I really don't see the specific appeal for a 6' 2" man to be with a much much shorter woman. Surely it would be physically awkward if nothing else? I dunno.
> 
> Definitely think just slightly shorter than me would be my ideal preference, in terms of both attraction and practicality :b.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I don't think it's just about the guy's height in comparison to yourself. I think people also want what is considered average/within the norm. So if I was 5'8, I'd probably we willing to date a guy that was the same height as me. Since I'm 5'3 there is no way I'd date someone that is the same as me.


----------



## anomalous (Jun 12, 2004)

komorikun said:


> I don't think it's just about the guy's height in comparison to yourself. I think *people also want what is considered average/within the norm*. So if I was 5'8, I'd probably we willing to date a guy that was the same height as me. Since I'm 5'3 there is no way I'd date someone that is the same as me.


Well, I think that's kind of the point and why so many guys complain about it. It'd be one thing if a girl doesn't want to feel big in comparison to her partner. But there seem to be tons and tons of shorter girls who still strongly prefer 6'+.

Also, if girls' preferences were centered on the average (5'10"), it wouldn't be a big issue for most guys. Instead, their preferences skew strongly toward the above-average side, such that even 5'10" guys have to worry (and 5'8" is at a large disadvantage, despite being only 2" from the mean). If I could pick a height to be most attractive to women it'd probably be 6'2", which is around the 80th percentile.

You have to admit, this is one area in the realm of physical appearance where it's worse to be a man. Women are judged harshly by their weight for sure, but guys' preferences probably center near the average weight for any given height (granted, 35th percentile is probably more popular than 65th, but it's close). With men, both height and tool size are simply a "bigger is better" affair for the most part (with exceptions for extreme outliers -- I understand 6'11" is not ideal). When you don't measure up in one or both areas, it's basically impossible to escape the fact that you're less appealing.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

anomalous said:


> Well, I think that's kind of the point and why so many guys complain about it. It'd be one thing if a girl doesn't want to feel big in comparison to her partner. But there seem to be tons and tons of shorter girls who still strongly prefer 6'+.
> 
> Also, if girls' preferences were centered on the average (5'10"), it wouldn't be a big issue for most guys. Instead, their preferences skew strongly toward the above-average side, such that even 5'10" guys have to worry (and 5'8" is at a large disadvantage, despite being only 2" from the mean). If I could pick a height to be most attractive to women it'd probably be 6'2", which is around the 80th percentile.
> 
> You have to admit, this is one area in the realm of physical appearance where it's worse to be a man. Women are judged harshly by their weight for sure, but guys' preferences probably center near the average weight for any given height (granted, 35th percentile is probably more popular than 65th, but it's close). With men, both height and tool size are simply a "bigger is better" affair for the most part (with exceptions for extreme outliers -- I understand 6'11" is not ideal). When you don't measure up in one or both areas, it's basically impossible to escape the fact that you're less appealing.


It's the same sort of. Men prefer women who are thinner than average (what is average now anyways which is slightly overweight) and women prefer men a bit taller than average.


----------



## lilyamongthorns (Aug 13, 2012)

It's not a deal breaker for me. I'm 5'2"-5'3"-ish, and I'd date a guy my height.


----------



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Only 4% of men in the US are 6'2" or taller. So it's a 96th percentile.

14.5% are 6'0" or taller.


----------



## SVIIC (Apr 15, 2005)

callalilly26 said:


> Haha I could probably start a brand new thread on why it's simply amazing for other reasons.


:um

IF... you know what I mean.



callalilly26 said:


> This has nothing to do with height, but I saw you're from Ireland.
> Your accents are so incredibly hot :/


Why thank you.



anomalous said:


> Also, if girls' preferences were centered on the average (5'10"), it wouldn't be a big issue for most guys. Instead, their preferences skew strongly toward the above-average side, such that even 5'10" guys have to worry (and 5'8" is at a large disadvantage, despite being only 2" from the mean). If I could pick a height to be most attractive to women it'd probably be 6'2", which is around the 80th percentile.


Yeah, I think there seems to be some kind of strange thing in society where 6' is seen as in some way "average" for a man.
Now, unless you're living in a place such as "the Dutchlands", that's pretty much far from the case.

Of course, another possibility... and I think probably an important one we may overlook, is that some or a lot of people may be just really really bad at judging height.

When they say 6', their idea of 6' might be more like 5' 10" sometimes. I dunno. A lot of people inflate their height too, so for example, Mark Wahlberg is 5' 10". That makes me at least 5' 10" :yes.



anomalous said:


> You have to admit, this is one area in the realm of physical appearance where it's worse to be a man.


The most annoying thing being you can't change your height. Unlike as hard as it might be for someone to lose weight or w/e.



Tanya1 said:


> Height I can see, but I think the rumour of women and shall we say, other areas, is bigger than the truth itself. I've never met a woman who cares how big a guy's 'tool' is. Just as long as they know what they're doing, seem to be most women's reaction. For me, it's so far from being important at all it's like barely a consideration.


Probably like how the importance of breast size is, I think, probably inflated to seem much more important to most men than I suspect it actually is.


----------



## Nexus777 (Dec 1, 2012)

SVIIC said:


> Probably like how the importance of breast size is, I think, probably inflated to seem much more important to most men than I suspect it actually is.


You suspect correct. For me its not important, but I would not go after VERY huge boobs. Just not into it, then rather tiny ones


----------



## Koolio (Feb 25, 2012)

Why do you keep talking about wanting to approach taller women? Why don't you approach women shorter than you? Because you have STANDARDS. Many guys want girls shorter than them, just like how girls want taller men, because like I said, everyone had standards, whether they like to admit or not.They're plenty of women that would be fine with your height (as you can see from the other females who replied), and many that wouldn't.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Tanya1 said:


> Height I can see, but I think the rumour of women and shall we say, other areas, is bigger than the truth itself. I've never met a woman who cares how big a guy's 'tool' is. Just as long as they know what they're doing, seem to be most women's reaction. For me, it's so far from being important at all it's like barely a consideration.


I know several people who don't like small ones. But the bigger the better is a lie. Personally, I don't like skinny ones.


----------



## Zeeshan (Sep 4, 2011)

bwidger85 said:


> didn't we already have this discussion? for the sake of argument, just discuss this with women in detail and I think it'll save me time. there may be a _higher_ reason that is evolutionarily beneficial for women to want a man with more resources but that also plays contradictory to what many women have already in the states, not including the leagues of other men who can easily support them without being even close to rich by any means. i can smell a debate coming on so maybe i should just stop now though...


Women have been primed through evolution to be attracted to man with large amount of resources. Consciously they will deny such biases but unconsciously irrelevant to how much they have they want the guy who has more $$$


----------



## SVIIC (Apr 15, 2005)

On this subject, I was walking through a shop a few hours ago and as I was leaving I saw this girl... presumably 20-25 but it's hard to tell of course. She caught my eye because I thought she looked quite nice (though I didn't see her too well or anything) and she was wearing this horizontal stripey shirt that seemed to make her look rather nice, ya know? She had glasses too in that cute sort of way, though I guess they were sorta hipsterey, but that doesn't mean she was a hipster anyway so bleh.

Anyway my point being, while I only got a brief glance at her, she did very much seem to... ring my bell as it were :roll and not only that I got the impression she might have even been somewhat interesting in that way you form prejudices in your mind about people based on whatever things you must have noticed subconsciously...

And she must have been about 5' 3' or less by my estimation. Can't say for sure but she certainly seemed rather small to me. Yet she still managed to get my attention enough that I remembered her and here I am posting to make a point .
The point being that it's hard to make rigid rules for these things and while you might see some patterns, in general they're best taken on a case-by-case basis.

Of course, we've gotten away from the original subject of the topic... but then we probably covered most of that a long time ago.

What do you think? Positive story? Positive message?
I should just stop fantasizing about getting to know random women??? (Not that one... Plz!)


----------



## tranquildream (Nov 17, 2010)

No, just gotta find a short girl. I'm 5 ft and I prefer shorter guys because of that...


----------



## Durzo (Jun 4, 2011)

Someone I know is smaller than you, maybe hes 5 foot... and he just got another girlfriend. Do not despair just because of height sir ^_^


----------



## whatyoumustthink (Apr 25, 2012)

lightningstorm said:


> I am not talking about 5'6, that would be ok


If it's any consolation dude, I'm 5"6, and have pretty much been rejected or mocked on the basis of that by the opposite sex my whole teenage-adult life.


----------



## Brandeezy (Dec 23, 2009)

whatyoumustthink said:


> If it's any consolation dude, I'm 5"6, and have pretty much been rejected or mocked on the basis of that by the opposite sex my whole teenage-adult life.


Me too. Who would want to date an short unattractive black guy?


----------



## Ricebunnyx3 (Sep 1, 2010)

For some girls, yes. There are very short girls out there though. Personally, I don't care. I'm 5'8 and I have found guys who are really short attractive.


----------



## Maxine79 (Mar 9, 2013)

It wouldn't be a deal breaker here.....it'd be easier for me to kiss them especially if they were 5'4 like me lol

I'm currently dating a 6 foot 8 guy and really height shouldn't be an issue in any relationship and anyone who considers it to be an issue is really shallow and not worth your time..

Sel x


----------



## H8PPLNDGS (Mar 15, 2013)

I knew of several men on the short side. One is about 4'9" it did not stop him from trying, another about 5'2 or 5'3 who ended up marrying a lovely lady and had his first son; another is married to one of my friends who normally prefers taller men and have a son as well. Oh there is another guy who seems to be shorter than I and around the gym he is considered one of the "it" guys for both men and women from what I hear. 
I really think (more like know) small breasted, pear shaped women who are not considered pretty in the face have a much tougher time getting dates/capturing interest than the considerably short man. Though I can understand lowering your standards and increasing your options can be very difficult at first for some people because as society we are conditioned to get the best there is for ego's sake.


----------



## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

I would guess it's a deal breaker for a lot of women even if they wont admit it.


----------



## AlchemyFire (Mar 4, 2013)

Everybody is so obsessed with height, but I personally like short guys, and I'm sure other girls do as well. Plus, there's lots of short girls out there. If a women is genuine and cares about _you_ as a person, she is not going to weed you out based on height. A superficial girl might do that, but seriously, you don't want to be with someone whose main focus is purely on physical traits. Sure, they're important to an extent, but some people take it to the extreme and it's quite ridiculous.

But I do understand where you're coming from. I'm 5'7" (female) and I wish I was shorter. I want to be like those cute, tiny girls, but instead I feel so bulky. My cousins are those types of girls, small, skinny, pretty. I'm taller than anyone on my mothers side of the family, most likely because I got my father's genes. Everyone on his side is really tall. I have a cousin that is around 6'10" I think, he hugged me once when I met him and I felt like I was being swallowed by something.

Anyway, the only problem I would have with a shorter guy would be the paranoia in my mind that he doesn't like the fact I'm taller than him. Personally, height doesn't make a difference to me.
But we're all paranoid of something around here, aren't we :lol


----------



## whatyoumustthink (Apr 25, 2012)

All my life, I've been rejected and mocked by women over this, even when they clearly liked my personality. I'd be lying if I said I don't think that accounts for something...

EDIT: Oh, I already posted in this, ha.


----------



## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

tranquildream said:


> No, just gotta find a short girl. I'm 5 ft and I prefer shorter guys because of that...


There's a lot more short guys than there are short girls. (males are much more variable than females in many different traits)










http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...re-still-be-sex-difference-even-when-there-is

An interesting theory I've heard is referring to males as "nature's gamblers". Since it only takes a limited number of males to impregnate all of the available females, evolution can afford to take more chances with male DNA and only the fittest males will be able to reproduce. So long as all of the females are reproducing, then the species will still be successful and evolution will be able to use the male variability to find more useful adaptions. This is also why people in general have an instinctual drive to be more supportive of Women than Men: 




The controversy starts when you realize this applies to other traits:

Like IQ


----------



## Josefz27 (Oct 26, 2012)

apparently for these women, lol. https://twitter.com/expsnghghtsm


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Yeah, but in the past children were much less likely of surviving to adulthood without a father. Why do you think women compete so fiercely for men and some form of marriage is found in all cultures? And this whole "survival of the species" stuff is a fallacy. Evolution is about certain genes being more favorable in a certain environment.


----------



## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

Josefz27 said:


> apparently for these women, lol. https://twitter.com/expsnghghtsm


It's a shame that no one cares when women are sexist. Just imagine the outrage if everyone one of those tweets replaced "short guys" with "fat girls".

So much butthurt, lol. :no


----------



## O Range (Feb 11, 2013)

Josefz27 said:


> apparently for these women, lol. https://twitter.com/expsnghghtsm


Oh god that twitter. I have seen that WAY too many times and it is just as frustrating. Who just keeps that saved up and linked when needed? It's maddening!


----------



## afff (Dec 27, 2012)

at 5'3 90% maybe more women will reject you. Girls who on here say they wouldn't care aren't thinking straight. And I don't mean it in a rude way. on the computer, 5'3 is just a number and most people don't visualize how it actually looks in real life. IF they saw you IRL they would realize how unattractive being that short actually is.


----------



## pkore1015 (Mar 22, 2013)

I'm about 5'4" and I used to work with a guy that was either my height or maybe an inch shorter, and he was dang sexy. xD


----------



## Gojira (Jun 1, 2015)

This is one of those things that just comes down to preference, but I do think it is one of the more superficial reasons to reject someone.

It's like rejecting an A cup for a C cup. That would be a completely superficial reason to reject someone.


----------



## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

The main things women look for in a relationship is height and white. Most will not admit it though. It's just how their biology is wired. Can't be mad at them for it. But yes, you are screwed when it comes to dating 90% of women. There is still hope though. Some women are midgets too.


----------



## absreim (Jun 19, 2012)

lightningstorm said:


> I am really anxious of approaching women on the street, who I find attractive.


That is quite rare even for people without SA, unless it is for something like asking for directions or just casual small talk.

People on this forum have really high standards for themselves with regard to what they can do.


----------



## Surly Wurly (May 9, 2015)

im gonna break down the statistics one time


THE MOST IMPORTANT FACTOR IN THIS is whether you actually TRY or not. so if you convince yourself its a dealbreaker, and dont try, then thats it, game over. 


everyone has features about them that might turn someone off, if you were george clooney i'm sure you'd get women that say "oh i like my men a bit rough and rugged" and you'd be friendzoned before you could flash your dental work.


----------



## Bbpuff (Sep 1, 2010)

It's a deal breaker for some girls mainly really tall ones it would probably be a dealbreaker for me as well if I was like 5'10 not going to lie. But there's plenty of shorties out there. I'm 5'3 myself and I used to date a guy who was either 5'3 or 5'4. He never really let his height bother him. And he's dated quite a few girls who were taller than him in the past. I don't think he's ever had a problem getting a girl and he isn't exceptionally attractive or anything. If you have a nice personality and really connect with her she shouldnt care about your height. And if she does she wasn't worth your time in the first place.


----------



## xxDark Horse (May 13, 2015)

I'm 5 ft 3 too.

And yes I suck with women. 

But it's not because i'm 5 ft 3...

Okay maybe a part of it is...

You see it's actually a combination of things that make you undatable. For instance, in addition to being 5 ft 3 i'm also shy, socially awkward, not very attractive and have absolutely **** social skills and I never put myself out there to meet girls. I'm undateable not because of my height, but because of the handicaps I have social wise that comes easy to most people. 

Yes you can get a girlfriend despite being 5 ft 3...

There are far worse things that limit your dating potential than being 5 ft 3. To name a few being noticeably disabled, being autistic, being homeless, late 20s and still live with your parents, etc...


Yes my height is probably a deal breaker to many women but i'm smart enough to know that it's not a deal breaker to all women. If I were 6 ft tall, yes it would probably widen my dating pool. But honestly, I don't let height bother me too much dating wise. This is how you should be OP. Realize your height will be deal breaker to some women but not all women.


----------

