# Dominant or Submissive?



## Fat Man (Nov 28, 2013)

Dominant or Submissive, which one do you consider yourself to be?

I think I'm pretty submissive.

*Edit*: In terms of being Dominant or Submissive in general, I'm pretty submissive. However, if a serious situation arises where I have no other choice but to act dominant, then I can be dominant.

When it comes to D/s in a relationship/sexual situation, I believe I'd enjoy being submissive. Theirs just something about being told what to do by my mistress that makes me so happy ^-^
(Did I just say that... good lord ._.)


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## UndreamingAwake (Apr 11, 2011)

I figured out a few years ago I do *not* take well to people bossing me around. Which is why I also decided to not join the military after all. That said, I used to think I was pretty submissive, at least sexually/romantically. Until yesterday... 
Met this chick that liked dominating dudes, the whole soft SM thing. So we met up, she tied me up and did stuff to me, and I really didn't care for it. Rather, it was boring as hell. All I wanted while she was doing her things was to take her... 

So yeah, I can now safely say that, since I'm not very dominant towards women either, I'm neither very dominant or submissive in relationships. And to be honest with you? I feel like a much happier man now. It's like my self-esteem took a big boost from that experience. She was kind of disappointed by me feeling this way, but I feel like I really do owe her for having given me the chance to experience this, and I think it's safe to say me feeling submissive was simply a result of low self-esteem for a long time.


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## Kanova (Dec 17, 2012)

I'm probably more sub than dom. I don't really like telling people what to do. Now I don't really know what Metalunatic was talking about, it sounds like she was doing like, denial or something. But if I were to do it, it would have to end in her getting my 45 seconds of fury.


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## tngrn (Nov 4, 2013)

I'm usually submissive. Though I'd rather remain neutral than be a high-handed prick or someone's b***h.


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## Estillum (Oct 24, 2012)

Neither. I hate following orders, especially from people who I don't respect, but I just as much hate giving them. 
Be my equal or leave me alone.


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## Srylance (Apr 20, 2014)

I think the majority of people here are submissive. Myself included.


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## indiscipline (May 24, 2015)

Definitely quite dominant, depending on the definition of the word but obviously a bit sensitive about my surroundings anyway.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

I like to be in control.


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## UndreamingAwake (Apr 11, 2011)

Kanova said:


> Now I don't really know what Metalunatic was talking about, it sounds like she was doing like, denial or something. But if I were to do it, it would have to end in her getting my 45 seconds of fury.


She did a lot of things. The only thing I really did enjoy was facesitting and showers (I'm sure you know what I mean by showers, but gotta keep it a bit vague for the younger forum members), but yeah, denial, whipping, tie up my member, and a few other things she did to me, as well as some things I simply refused to do that weren't my cup of tea. Some of said "things" were actually so much of a turn off that I lost any and all desire to continue, much to her dismay lol.

No, I'd rather have some kinky teasing games, or tender love making with some roughness in between. Which is funny, considering I used to find the idea of being dominated by a lovely lady very exciting. And she was quite lovely. Very nice body and voice, which pretty much caused instant arousal, but when we progressed deeper into the SM stuff, I started losing interest. I tried it, didn't like it. To each his own. *shrug*



Estillum said:


> Neither. I hate following orders, especially from people who I don't respect, but I just as much hate giving them.
> Be my equal or leave me alone.


This pretty much describes how I feel about it now.


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## GGTFM (Oct 7, 2014)

Both in terms of sex.


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## truant (Jul 4, 2014)

Sub all the way in relationships, but I can stand up for myself outside of that context.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

Both, haha.


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## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

sub. I'm a beta. Girls want a dominant man, not a loser like me, damn.


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## 3 AM (Mar 29, 2014)

Why not both?!

[if we're talking about sexual matters, that is]


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## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

It depends on what you mean by "dominant" and "submissive".

If there is a regular option I choose that.



Metalunatic said:


> I figured out a few years ago I do *not* take well to people bossing me around. Which is why I also decided to not join the military after all. That said, I used to think I was pretty submissive, at least sexually/romantically. Until yesterday...
> Met this chick that liked dominating dudes, the whole soft SM thing. So we met up, she tied me up and did stuff to me, and I really didn't care for it. Rather, it was boring as hell. All I wanted while she was doing her things was to take her...
> 
> So yeah, I can now safely say that, since I'm not very dominant towards women either, I'm neither very dominant or submissive in relationships. And to be honest with you? I feel like a much happier man now. It's like my self-esteem took a big boost from that experience. She was kind of disappointed by me feeling this way, but I feel like I really do owe her for having given me the chance to experience this, and I think it's safe to say me feeling submissive was simply a result of low self-esteem for a long time.


Man, now I remember I never got back to you ! I am sorry !

Don't get something, she liked "dominant dudes" but she tied you up ? am I missing something ?

So are you in the Netheerlands military ? Cool.


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## Sean07 (May 9, 2014)

Dominant is most contexts, interchangeable in others.


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## MetalheadFurry (May 21, 2015)

NanoStar SOUL said:


> Dominant or Submissive, which one do you consider yourself to be?
> 
> I think I'm pretty submissive.


I am a switch actually but I prefer being dom. I personally wouldnt care less as long as I get pleased x3


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## Nonsensical (Mar 29, 2013)

I'm definitely dominant but I dislike taking on leadership roles. I prefer being a guiding hand rather than telling people what to do.


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## acidicwithpanic (May 14, 2014)

Depends on who I'm with. Given my cultural background (I have traditional, immigrant parents), I'm more likely to act submissive towards them as a sign of loyalty and respect. Most other people, especially close friends, have told me that I seem intimidating and in control of myself.


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## that quiet foreigner (May 4, 2013)

Depends on my surroundings and the situation. With more submissive people I get more dominant, with situations I don't really care about leading I am submissive. If I didn't have any degree of SA I would be pretty dominant overall.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Whynotboth.Jpeg


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## ScorchedEarth (Jul 12, 2014)

I'm no leader at all but I'm also extremely headstrong against unjust authority. Truth be told, I'm less competent and self-sufficient than most. I'm in no way ready to live independently of family, let alone boss anyone around, and often need instructions for things that seem self-explanatory to most. In what little work experience I have, I've seen that I'm dependent on precise instructions until I know the routine - no initiative whatsoever. And God help you if the routine changes. Headless chickens come to mind.


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## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)

definitely submissive.


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## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

SilentLyric said:


> definitely submissive.


Last time you slapped me :crying:


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

Neither really.


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## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

I am submissive, but like to be dominant. That is why I always like to work alone.


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## UndreamingAwake (Apr 11, 2011)

sajs said:


> It depends on what you mean by "dominant" and "submissive".
> 
> If there is a regular option I choose that.
> 
> ...


It's cool, don't worry about it. I was too busy moving for the past month anyway. About the dominating thing; I swear I wrote she liked *dominating* dudes, as in, she's the one doing the dominating. I understand how you might have gotten confused there though lol. Also, no, I was seriously considering joining up for the Army for a while, but like I said, I really am just not very good at taking orders, plus hayfever without medication was too bad anyway.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Both.


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## SD92 (Nov 9, 2013)

Submissive, I'm not a leader at all. Always hated it when the teacher in school tried to make me lead. It would have been like Snails leading Elephants.


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## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

Submissive until the point when circumstances dictate I can't be anymore


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## Ntln (Apr 27, 2012)

I know this is the boring generic answer, but something in between or both depending on the situation. Both roles can give me anxiety, the pressure of being "dominant" and the lack of control from being "submissive" which is I guess why I'm drawn to people as similar/equal to me as possible


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## Surly Wurly (May 9, 2015)

I have been known to show myself who's boss


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## TCNY (Dec 3, 2014)

i am your slave master


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## i just want luv (Feb 13, 2011)

Double' Dominant Domination, yeh


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## Fat Man (Nov 28, 2013)

TCNY said:


> i am your slave master


^This!


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

During sex? I enjoy both roles.


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## CWe (Mar 7, 2010)

Both? Depends on the situation


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## zonebox (Oct 22, 2012)

I'm domissive.


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

Dominant female.

I like real submissive men who are a little wet behind the ears, could stand to use female authority in their lives, soft-spoken, gentle, nice to look at.

I HATE DOMINANT MEN, specially those minorities who grew up in chauvinist cultures, they can kiss my a** the moment a man "pretends" to know more than me or feigns some superiority on me, the moment I say nice knowing you, good luck to the wimp who gets you. It doesn't help that you're f----ing 5'9 cause you're Mexican or Arab and think you're all that, try again sweetheart

Omg, I love sub men though. So hot. A lot of the sub men are white guys though in my experience. Their mommas taught them to be really submissive and catering to women.

My crush right now is soooo non-imposing, is so quiet-mannered, so passive, that's how I like them. I like to be able to boss them around, really warms my heart. He won't say hi to me unless I say hi to him first and he'll wait for my direction, I eat it right up :lol


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## burgerchuckie (May 31, 2012)

I don't like being told what to do and I don't easily trust people so I rarely get submissive.


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## SummerRae (Nov 21, 2013)

Sub. Tell me what to do daddy [ @TangoTiger ]


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## BeingofFlesh (May 14, 2015)

I prefer picking her up, throwing her on the bed and proceed to make love to her in a tender and rough way. I've tried to play the submissive role a bit, and it can be nice to see her passion and lust unfold, but it does'nt do anything much for me sexually, although it's the greatest feeling of being wanted bad. So ya, 2cents.


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## bloodymary (Apr 26, 2009)

I don´t think I am either of them. Both extremes are insane.


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## Silere (Oct 19, 2014)

Neither, I do as I'm told when given instruction from a superior when it's reasonable if it's not then I won't, simple as that. I don't like being dominant and at the same time I don't like being submissive, so I keep a balance and do what I thinks right.


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## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

I'm more dominant than submissive.


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## Demure (Jul 14, 2014)

I'm submissive because I don't want to be a bother.


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## wrongnumber (May 24, 2009)

that quiet foreigner said:


> Depends on my surroundings and the situation. With more submissive people I get more dominant, with situations I don't really care about leading I am submissive. If I didn't have any degree of SA I would be pretty dominant overall.


Same.


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## sad vlad (Nov 9, 2013)

Not sure. I have my moments. Depends on the situation and the people involved.


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## HIGHfrombeingSHY (Mar 9, 2015)

You can't be dominant and have social anxiety. That's a contradiction. Although, you don't have to be automatically submissive when you have social anxiety.

Now sex is another issue. I love to be dominant in bed. There's nothing more erotic than having full control over your prey... uh, I mean girlfriend.


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