# University???



## catsandmoonpies (Apr 26, 2018)

I just got my high school diploma less than a week ago and previously, I was completely against ever going to college. I’ve always been so anxious at school and never felt like I fit in. But when I was at graduation, everyone around me kept bugging me about what I was gonna do next and I flat out told them I don’t have a single idea. At that point, I hadn’t applied to any schools so I was sitting there feeling so aimless. 

Anyways, fast forward a few days and I mailed in a fafsa and today, I applied to a close by university that I had previously done concurrent enrollment with. I did both of those things on a whim and I didn’t think much about what I was even doing. Ahhh!! I just don’t know what I want!

The idea of college makes me feel so incredibly anxious. What if I can never find my classes? What if I don’t make any friends? What if we have to do partnership work and nobody teams up with me so I sit there like a loser? Or what if we’ve gotta do oral reports and presentations a ton?? All those things are what constantly keep playing in my head. I also have to worry about how I’m gonna pay for it. Chances are I’ll get some scholarships and hopefully a grant so that’ll cover a lot, but still, what if I don’t?

I should’ve done all this while I was still in high school, I’m really late to the game. 
I should mention that I’m thinking of getting my bachelors in botany and I’m really scared to do that. I took biology my freshman year of hs and I did alright at it. Chemistry and algebra is where I suck tho... and I’ve never taken physics before so I’m really worried. 

The whole idea of university terrifies me so much. I just don’t know what else to do with my life.


----------



## Asu (May 16, 2018)

Hey, it's good that you found the motivation to do something! Because even if you didn't go to college, you'd still have to do something, bee it a gap year, apprenticeship or whatever. And no matter what you choose, there will probably be situations that you might dislike, so moving forward is the best you can do. Did your parents never bug you about all these things, I'd have expected that they'd try to steer you in one direction or another.


Is it correct, when I assume that you're American? Because at least where I come from (Germany), not going to university is completely normal and many people go into training or apprenticeship in a company or such instead. To me that seems totally fine but I know that everyone is more or less expected to go to college in the US. 



If you don't mind, I'll also talk a little about your study choice. I did a bachelor in biology and am currently doing my master's in plant biology/biotechnology, so I suppose, my field is at least related. 



So first of all, what kind of botany will it be? It's a bit sad but classic biology (taxonomy and such) fell a lot in popularity. So when you say botany, it probably includes more than just systematics and goes into all the molecular and genetic topics as well. Depending on your specialization, surviving without physics should work quite well except for some basic courses. But you cannot get rid of all other sciences. Chemistry will be an important foundation for many topics and knowing a little maths is always good. Statistics and informatics/programming could be other things that you will most likely encounter.

Are you really set on studying plants? Otherwise, it might be easier to begin with a broader bachelor (e.g. biology or life sciences) and then narrow it down later on. This keeps more possibilities open in the long run in case you discover that plants are not really your thing. I, for example, started my biology studies with the mindset, that I'd like to work in the field of ecology and mainly with small animals like insects. Now I'm studying neither animals nor ecology so that might illustrate how much interests can shift over time. 



But I suppose it also all depends on what you want to do later on. A research career or working for environmental authorities will probably require college. If you just like flowers and are a creative person, becoming a florist or the like could also be an interesting possibility. But I guess, you don't really know yet.


----------



## smoothlinghs (Jun 2, 2018)

Only think the job you want to do and study that where ever it is.


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

_What if I can never find my classes? 
_I'm sure there will be a way to find your classes, maybe the first day will be difficult and you'll be lost but eventually, you'll understand how things work.

_What if I don't make any friends? 
_That's not the most important , in university, you can make some friends, but most people only make some acquaintance there. Of curse, try to make friends, they may help you when you need it the most, but again, as I said, your main goal is to learn and graduate.

_What if we have to do partnership work and nobody teams up with me so I sit there like a loser? 
_Believe me, you won't be the only one who suffers that. I know this I'm telling won't help you, but you must be prepared and aware that such things happen. In those cases, you'll work with someone that's in your same condition but if no one else is, you can ask the professor to work alone due to the situation, they'll agree normally.

_Or what if we've gotta do oral reports and presentations a ton??
_1. Study.
2. Learn tricks to work the scenic fear and to improve speeches. 
3. Try to pick between your options a degree in which oral speeches aren't the core of the studies, as it would be in the case of law, education, political sciences and few the like, maybe math or electronics requires less this kind of activities, but maybe the one you like (botanic) too.

_All those things are what constantly keep playing in my head.
_Go there and figure it out, you can also talk to someone in the university that will explain you better what it's the profile of the graduate, meaning what's expected in each degree a student does.

_ I also have to worry about how I'm gonna pay for it. Chances are I'll get some scholarships and hopefully a grant so that'll cover a lot, but still, what if I don't?
_Good luck with that. 

_I should've done all this while I was still in high school, I'm really late to the game. 
_If you really want it, try, if it's impossible then you can quit, I guess. When I was younger I was studying to become a fashion designer and had to quit, it was just too much for me, it was awful, way too expensive considering the materials I was required, payments, transportation... I also entry to study Administration but I didn't like it, back those days I was even afraid to go to the library and ask for a book, however my family kept pushing me, so I worked my options for something else in a more friendly university, I'm still studying and I'm happier now, funny fact: I now work in a university lol, one of the places I suffered the most in haha. 

_The whole idea of university terrifies me so much. I just don't know what else to do with my life.
_:hug You can work too, study out of university etc.


----------



## Tuan Jie (Apr 6, 2017)

@catsandmoonpies
Cangratulations with your diploma and your consequent bold moves towards uni. And welcome here!

Since you seem to be so uncertain about what you want and you're so young, why not take your time and work for a bit while making up your mind? That's what I did. It would help to get through rough patches at uni if you are committed to your study. Don't forget about all the potential fun stuff! I won't say I had the time of my life, but it wasn't all doom and gloom either. Good luck!

Edit: One more thing. When you do decide to go to university it can greatly lower your stess level if you talk to someone at uni about it. I had somewhat regular conversations with what I think translates to the _dean_ there. There may be a straigtforward uni psychologist for this sort of thing by now. Who knows, I'm old


----------



## Tuan Jie (Apr 6, 2017)

Sus y said:


> _...funny fact: I now work in a university lol, one of the places I suffered the most in haha. ..._


_ Love it! Good for you!_


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Tuan Jie said:


> @catsandmoonpies
> Cangratulations with your diploma and your consequent bold moves towards uni. And welcome here!
> 
> Since you seem to be so uncertain about what you want and you're so young, why not take your time and work for a bit while making up your mind? That's what I did. It would help to get through rough patches at uni if you are committed to your study. Don't forget about all the potential fun stuff! I won't say I had the time of my life, but it wasn't all doom and gloom either. Good luck!


I agree with this. I suffered a lot but yet, I had my fun too, it may seem contradictory but it's not. Some situations and occasions were really terrible, I was not able to be alone basically or anxiety (general anxiety) would eat my soul, but once I had friends around, I had such an awesome time, I kind of regret I drank too much back those days, but young people... are going to do young things.



Tuan Jie said:


> Love it! Good for you!


----------



## CastawayGaming (Feb 1, 2015)

I have just completed university, and had the same worrying thoughts as you, but at the end, if you went out and got a job there would be similar fears. It seems that everyone at uni is very friendly as you are all in it together, and everyone supports each other.


----------



## BarbieTingz (May 27, 2018)

I have social anxiety/panic attacks and I’m in college. The aspects of college aren’t like high school. Group work at my college doesn’t really exist unless you’re a bio major like myself(we have to work in lab groups a lot) and your group is basically who you sit by. As for presentations, you’re just gonna have to do them. I’ve had an anxiety attack during every single one and still managed to get an A. In college you just have to fend for yourself which I struggled with but honestly everyone figures it out pretty much. When you’re presenting honestly nobody is really paying attention so if you stumble nobody will make fun of you. As a freshman making friends is super easy unless you barricade yourself in your dorm all day and talk to nobody. You can meet people the most in your dorm hall, at lunch, or in clubs. Literally just say anything to someone and ask to keep in touch and you’ll find a friend. 

As a person with anxiety I had a really hard time adjusting to having a roommate (i had to be moved twice) and ended up with a single room. I’d advise you get a single room in college because your roommate will most likely be more outgoing and have guests frequently which is really uncomfortable if you’re introverted. 

I don’t know what you wanna do for a career choice, but if it doesn’t require a four year bachelors degree I’d advise you look for alternative methods. Or possibly try taking your courses online at home if you find the idea of college too overwhelming. I personally just have to force myself to be there because I want to be a doctor. 

Good luck.


----------



## El Psy Kongrooo (Dec 26, 2017)

Try to revise during summer to ease worries about you coping, just an hour a day is fine. That's what I done and I'm now starting a biology degree at an 'AAA' University (UK) 4 years after failing it in high school.


----------

