# Social anxiety has dissolved - what helped me



## velvet1 (Aug 11, 2010)

I haven't been here anymore because obviously my social anxiety has moved on or just dissolved. I might struggle on days were I feel depressed and having issues with life but still keep going on. Here some things that have helped tremendously that let me go of the world social anxiety.

*Spirituality*: Depending how open minded you're this has truly helped me so much in my development. Listening to my intuition, knowing that there is someone beside reassuring me that everything is going to be alright. For example, I believe in Angels&Spirit guides. So I always ask my angels for help from them. I ask&detach myself and I see the results. I don't doubt whether is it real or not, I just let it be. I always see double digit numbers, when around everyday lately as a sign that everything is going to alright. (http://spiritlibrary.com/doreen-virtue/number-sequences-from-the-angels)

_Tarot_: I learned tarot since I'm into Spirituality, so this another tool. When I need some answer&questions in my life. I ask a source like my higher self or Spirit guides about life situations and what I should do or learn from certain things in my life.

_Meditation_: Before going to sleep, I try to do relaxing meditation and detach any negative energy while infusing my body with new energy. You can find a lot of ideas online on how to different meditation.

_Crystals_: Its a new hobby of mine but I have seen some lovely affects from it. Its another lovely crutch, I have a small patch were I carry 3-4 small crystals and put them in my pocket. Sometimes a crystal pendant to go on my neck or a bracelet. They're all kinds of crystals for different types of ailments (http://www.healingcrystals.com/). Right now I'm wearing rose quartz necklace pendant for self love, releasing negative energy, unconditional love. The first time I wore my rose quartz pendant, I was releasing a lot of old energy&memories out of the blue and that meant crying to release everything. I noticed that it helps you look younger&refresh because I've noticed it makes me look refresh.

In my patch I have *moldavite* represents transformation, clearing blockages, letting go of the old that don't serve us in our lives. *Carnelian*, is a stone for grounding, courage, physical energy, concentration, acceptance, and self esteem. The last one is *Rhodochrosite*, its for helping with relationships, finding love, improving self worth, heart chakra, releasing emotional stress, calmness, and forgiveness.

Like I said the crystals are an ailment, but its not something that will solve the problems in an instant. You will see subtle changes slowly or fast depending on your life. For example, I combined this three rocks w/ my pendant. My day was very smooth day, from what I've noticed. I got hug from a co-worker and compliments. Got some free food today, pizza from both my jobs. For a Monday, that's not bad. You see little things in life and you start appreciating the little subtle changes&signs.

*Music*: Music is another way of grounding myself in this everyday life which can be stressful. I usually have my pandora with favorite stations, I put it on shuffle and of course ask in my mind for answers or what I need to know from songs. Depending how I feel I get little messages from the songs or encouragements. Try it and see how it works for you.

*Reading*: This refers back to spirituality, I started reading spiritual books like _*Destiny of Souls* by Michael Newton_ and his other books by him. _*Conversation with God (series) *by Neale Donald Walsh_, _*Your Soul's Plan: Discovering the Real Meaning of the Life you Planned Before You Were Born* by Robert Schwartz, *In The Afterlife: A Chronicle Of Our Experiences On The "Other Side" by *April Crawford, *Life Before Life: Children's Memories of Previous Lives* by Jim Tucker.

^ _If it wasn't for this books, I don't know where I would be in this life. They helped me so much when it came to me asking the more complex questions. Why are here? Why this place? Whats the point of it all? Is there more than just this, their has to be more than just the superficial?
A few books about philosophy&self help books that also helped me. _*The Art of Happiness *by Dalai Lama_, _*The Alchemist by *Paulo Coelho_, *Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength by *_Laurie Helgoe_

*Ralph Waldo Emerson* I haven't read his books yet but his quotes are resonating and helpful. My favorite quote from him. Here one of his research (http://www.rwe.org/complete-works/vii---society-and-solitude.html)

"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and to endure the betrayal of false friends. To appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know that even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded."
― _Ralph Waldo Emerson

_*Movies*: So many too name but they're just amazing when it comes to just finding answers or just going into another world.
*Into The Wild*, *The Shawshank Redemption*, *Before Sunset*, *Amelie*, *The Fountain*, *Three Colors: Red*, *Three Colors: Blue*, *I Am Legend*,* Il Mare (korean version)*, *A Single Man*, *The Pursuit of Happyness*, *Mulan*, *Wings of Desire*, *Stranger Than Fiction*, *Being Elmo*, *Midnight in Paris*, *Rise of the Planet of the Apes *_(2011)_, *A Little Romance*, *The Diving Bell and the Butterfly*, *The Air I Breathe*, *The Mist*, *Babel*, *Something New*, *The Human Experience*, *The Secret Garden*. They're so many more but movies do have some great meaning and creativity.

*Job*: Getting a job, it could be hard for people here but its a great step. It might take trials but you gotta keep trying. Ask around for example from friends&family to see if they can give you at least a reference because they might network around to find out who is hiring. Also, if bosses at least know kind of your problem that kind of eases the situation. They might give you more of a chance but also put you at ease. Once you get a job, see how others work around. See what type cues they do, learn from it and mold it to your own. Learn from your errors&trials, instead of stressing about it remember that its all about learning everyday. The more you repeat the process&practicing the better you get social and work ethnics.

*Mind&Positivity*: Its all about the mind and how well you cope with the situations. Are you being negative and bringing yourself down all the time? Well the more you keep putting yourself down the more you're gonna be depressed. It lowers your energy but also others can sense it as well. That type of energy attracts negativity so catch your thoughts. Instead, try to imagine your positivity is at a certain level. For example it might be down, well imagine its going up until it reaches the smiley face level. If something goes wrong also try to find humor in it to make things at ease will help. Note if you need to cry in private release it, or perhaps write your emotions down on paper and than burn it&tear it up.

*Exercise&Balance diet&Sleeping*: Keeping your body moving releases stressing hormones from your body but also bring more energy into your body so that's important. Also the foods that you eat are also a big thing, are you eating junk food or are you eating nutrients that you need like veggies, fruits, and protein.

*Social Situations*: Depending were you're than you work with what you have. Everyone is at a different level when it comes to how they're socially so don't compare yourself to others. If you forget your wordings or stutter, because of nervousness try to relax and slow down your wording. When you hurry your words with anxiety its bound to get twisted. Also, a good way is to not thing so much what you're gonna say. Its hard, its about letting things enter in your mind slowly :idea. For example when I'm talking to a person I don't know that I'm not so comfortable for whatever reason, I try to zone out for a moment to explain myself. I might use the wording 'well....' or 'I believe' and sometimes this expressions :sus. If you forget to say something let it go don't dwell, if you have the opportunity just say you just remember.

Even if you still feel that anxiety feeling, let it be but follow your plan. Its like an intimating boss standing beside your shoulder. Keep doing what you have to do as if it was never their.

*Strengths*: Know your strengths, what are you good at or what qualities that sets you apart from others. Try to figure this out because this will help you out to put those things in the open to expand yourself but to also acquire new strengths. My strength is optimism, even when things go wrong I know something will come for the better. I'm able to see the tree from a long horizon that seems so far away. So in away its very important knowing this because it is sort of like a crutch.

Well, hoping this helps or gives some ideas to those who are still struggling with this. If you have any questions, I'll be happy to answer them. Much love <3.


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## panzimar (Oct 4, 2011)

That's excellent! Congrats!
This is a great list. I'm working through all of these things myself. Everything but the job one, I'm still working up the nerve for that one! I really think it would immerse me in social situations, and I need that constant interaction, because right now I'm doing it of my own volition which means a lot of dead ends.

 Thank you for sharing, I hope you're living a much more fullfilled life now


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## InMyDreams55 (Apr 1, 2011)

Thanks for sharing!


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## velvet1 (Aug 11, 2010)

panzimar said:


> That's excellent! Congrats!
> This is a great list. I'm working through all of these things myself. Everything but the job one, I'm still working up the nerve for that one! I really think it would immerse me in social situations, and I need that constant interaction, because right now I'm doing it of my own volition which means a lot of dead ends.
> 
> Thank you for sharing, I hope you're living a much more fullfilled life now


The job one is a tough one I must say, but if you keep going I'm sure you'll find one eventually. I know because I still have trouble with interviews sometimes, it all depends. Sometimes I'm able to connect with the interviewer and other times it falls flat. Its true a job just put you out in the open, so it gets you out of your comfort zone. The more you repeat it, the more it becomes like second nature.

No problem, it is in a way just making me open up more and become more independent little by little. When I look back and seen where I'm now I can finally say I'm more confident in heading forward with my life.

Don't give up, keep going even if it seems like there might be a dead end they're always solutions.


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## JamesC (Feb 28, 2012)

Nice one well done!!


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