# Skeptical



## Smoke Eyes (Jun 5, 2012)

I've been seeing a shrink for about 3 years. When I made the first appointment with his office, they asked me if it was a "Medication appointment". Because I WAS seeking Klonopin for legit and crippling anxiety, I said "Yes". 

The doctor asked some basic questions, and put me on 1mg/day.

It's up to 1.5/day now, and it's been a wonder drug for me, it just about saved my life.

But I've not dealt with why and how social anxiety suddenly appeared in my life. I had always been well liked and social, often gregarious and outgoing even.

Then BOOM. A hammer dropped on my world, and I do not understand it. 

And every 3 months my doctor asks how I am, I say fine, he writes a script.

He's never even asked me if I want to talk about things. I'm not sure he's the guy I'd want to talk to, but you'd think his training would compel him to want to explore other methods in addition to drugs.

I suppose I could initiate a conversation, but I'm not sure we'd be able to make any sense of it.

I've always been a little f*cked up from a traumatic divorce when I was a kid and the subsequent upheaval, but my current condition surely can't be because of it. 

I used to use recreational narcotics...pot when I was a teenager, and Ecstacy when I was in my late 20's-early 30's. I wonder if the changes in my brain chemistry are to blame for the onset of anxiety?

Can a shrink really help me?


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## Smoke Eyes (Jun 5, 2012)

(I don't want to be handcuffed by meds the rest of my life)


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## Sierpinski (Jun 17, 2012)

Are you able to maintain the dosage without raising it? I was under the impression that one had to keep raising the dosage of benzo. Eventually, it begins to impair cognition. But it would be great if that's not true.


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## Smoke Eyes (Jun 5, 2012)

Sierpinski said:


> Are you able to maintain the dosage without raising it? I was under the impression that one had to keep raising the dosage of benzo. Eventually, it begins to impair cognition. But it would be great if that's not true.


I started out at 1mg over 3 years ago, and raised it to 1.5mg last year. Often times I don't even take the extra .5mg. So it's worked wonders for me, and I don't feel the need to increase the dosage.

But even though I'm on a low dosage, I'd be screwed without it. I'd have a total meltdown. That's what scares me, the complete reliance on it.

Sometimes I think about taking a 2 week trip to Europe, but then I think "What if I lost my meds on my first night?" I'd be totally screwed. And it's this ball and chain effect that is a drag. I'd like to envision a future without being on medication.

That's why I'm on here asking for advice about therapy, and what I might expect from it.


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## Mil (Aug 22, 2011)

You could try doing CBT on your own.


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## Paul Hughes 2 (Sep 21, 2012)

Hello

I suppose, ultimately, you won't know if you don't find out.

Call a number of therapists and check out their qualifications and approaches. Get a feel for their personalities and whether, or not, you feel as if you could work with them.

Best wishes

Paul


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## Smoke Eyes (Jun 5, 2012)

Thanks...my current doc doesn't seem to be naturally empathetic, at least not on a surface level. He's nice enough, but our sessions last 5 minutes, enough time for him to write the script...


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## jonny neurotic (Jan 20, 2011)

Mil said:


> You could try doing CBT on your own.


This...


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## Smoke Eyes (Jun 5, 2012)

jonny neurotic said:


> This...


How does one go about doing that alone?


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## Solomon's Tomb (Aug 14, 2012)

It sounds to me like you're seeing an actual doctor, not a therapist. Therapists don't have the authority to write prescriptions, nor do they engage in the pointless "psychotherapy" that so-called 'psychologists' do.


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## jonny neurotic (Jan 20, 2011)

Smoke Eyes said:


> How does one go about doing that alone?


Tell you what. I'll give you my take on it...

First you have to recognise error is in you thinking;

*Errors in Thinking
*​

*Black and White Thinking* - _all or nothing_
*Catastrophising* - _"I got nervous so now I've blown it!"_
*Predicting the Future* - _"They'll think I'm weird and wont want me to talk to them."_
*Discounting Positives *-_ "I know we seemed to be getting along well but that doesn't mean they think of me as a friend."_
*Emotive Reasoning* - _feelings or beliefs outweighing evidence_
*Labelling *
*Magnification/Minimisation* -_ allowing mistakes to take precedence over successes_
*Mind Reading* - _"She thinks I'm lying to her," or "He thinks I'm stupid."_
*Overgeneralisation *- _"Kids at school are so mean."_
*Personalisation* - _"Everyone was quiet because of me," or "Those people laughing on the street corner are laughing at me."_

Every time you feel bad you have to question it. Ask "Why am I feeling this way?" Be aware of the context, the situation you are in - be particular: even seemingly insignificant things can be of great importance, we are after talking about the subconscious mind.

I have never written anything down because I have ADHD and when I sit down to do it my mind goes blank so I just keep reading stuff and try to factor it into my thinking as much as I can. I re-read things often to see if I have remembered it and if it all seems familiar then I am sure that it has been consigned to memory but if it doesn't then I will go back to again in the future. I find it useful to think of CBT more like being given the "User Manual" for you brain rather than as a form of therapy. It is designed to give you tools to use in your every day life not just a "treatment" that you do until you are better. Being a better person is about always looking forward and always questioning yourself, your beliefs, your thoughts and your emotions.

I have been using medication too and that has been invaluable but you must find whatever combination of factors *you *need, to improve the situation you are in...


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## Smoke Eyes (Jun 5, 2012)

Thanks for that, it's a good starting point.


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