# Does anyone else have this problem while in therapy?



## kismetie (May 20, 2012)

So basically I get too scared to say what's really on my mind when I go see my counselor. Like I can't help but think everything I am feeling and thinking is very petty and silly. My counselor can tell I'm holding back but I still can't bring myself to say more than half of the stuff I want to say at all. I've tried reading off a paper but I can't do that either and if I write it for her to read I can't even work up the nerve to tell her I've brought it in. I feel like my problems and issues aren't important enough and a waste of time and always leave the appointments only half satisfied because I don't get all I want to say out, because i can only work out a bit and explain it clearly without my doubts and fears of ridicule clouding my judgment. And crazy enough, even though I don't tell her everything I still (or rather use to now that it is summer) get really anxious when I miss a session.


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## Michael127 (Dec 10, 2011)

That is kind of the way relationships work though. You tell them a little at a time. You don't tell them everything right away. Just take small steps and don't beat yourself up if you don't mention everything.

For me, I tend to get anxious leading up to a counselling appointment. I have one this Thurs. I get more anxious when it gets close because I have to do what I fear the most, open up and trust. It is not easy for some of us.


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## SweetNSour82 (Dec 19, 2011)

Yes I have the same problem.


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## Dying note (Mar 17, 2009)

Yes, I had the same issue and even decided to stop going to therapy when I'd had about six months worth of sessions and wasn't seeing an improvement in my ability to open up about certain problems. I needed more time to get to that point were I could actually share and not feel so terrified of their reaction or of the consequences. I just wasn't as ready as I thought and felt I'd wasted enough time already.
But when I did start therapy again, with a new doctor and different circumstances, I was better prepared to speak my mind and open up with the truth. I still need notes on occasion so that I don't neglect important things that slip my mind under pressure, but it's easier to get the words out than it's ever been.


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## blue the puppy (Jul 23, 2011)

i absolutely have that problem -- i think the therapist plays a role here too, your comfort level and the way the therapist talks will effect how much you tell them.

ive been seeing a therapist for a year now and still am having a lot of trouble opening up. i'm going to stop seeing him at the end of this month, partly because of that.


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## Revan (Jun 28, 2009)

Yeah, I have that problem too but you need to be open and honest with your therapist if you're going to get anything out of this. First of all, anything you discuss with your therapist is confidential unless she feels you're a danger to yourself or others. And whatever it is you're embarrassed to share...remember - this woman is a trained professional. She's probably dealt with plenty of cases so I'm sure there is nothing you could tell her that she would find too shocking. She gets paid to do a job and that's to help you get better so make her earn every damn penny.


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## NegativeCreep (Dec 2, 2011)

I thought I was the only one. I barely say a word even though I have a lot on my mind. I start to worry that I'm wasting my therapist's time.


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## lisbeth (May 18, 2012)

kismetie said:


> So basically I get too scared to say what's really on my mind when I go see my counselor. Like I can't help but think everything I am feeling and thinking is very petty and silly. My counselor can tell I'm holding back but I still can't bring myself to say more than half of the stuff I want to say at all. I've tried reading off a paper but I can't do that either and if I write it for her to read I can't even work up the nerve to tell her I've brought it in. I feel like my problems and issues aren't important enough and a waste of time and always leave the appointments only half satisfied because I don't get all I want to say out, because i can only work out a bit and explain it clearly without my doubts and fears of ridicule clouding my judgment. And crazy enough, even though I don't tell her everything I still (or rather use to now that it is summer) get really anxious when I miss a session.


You just described me, too... in the six months I've been seeing my therapist there's not been any change in my SA or other problems, but I don't know whether it's my fault for the reasons you said, or whether it's that she isn't doing a good job. Lately I find myself too anxious even to make another appointment, so I haven't seen her in weeks.


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## sickofshyness (Oct 18, 2011)

yes, yes, and yes


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