# Dr.Richards "ants"



## svartsaft (Feb 21, 2014)

If u know the title. u know what im talking about. or i make new tread till i get the awnser im looking for.
But asuming im not alone lissening to hes sessions. He talks about "ants" automaticly negative thougts.
He say they are bullies, the wanna push you down etc. But the problem im having with this "ants" theory is. They are ALWAYS LIARS.
common! REALY? how the **** am i suppost to belive that.

Like if i see a girl. ants go "you blew it" "she wont be intrested in you" 
How the **** dont i know thats not the truth. I realy realy can start assuming every negative thought is a lie. Becouse. Hey. Thats ****ing unlikely.

Or am i missing something about the "ants" theory?

Like now. My "ants" tell me nooone will give a **** about this post or even respond. You wont get the support i realy realy need to move on. How the **** do i know thats not true.

Should i just walk around in life assuming everything will go perfect or what. What is he trying to say? plz


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

People with SA have more negative thinking than most people - they make us second guess ourselves. That is the point he is trying to make. We have to see them for what they are.


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## jdrubnitz (Jan 26, 2013)

svartsaft,

forget about what's a lie or truth when it comes to these. Figure out what helps you. First figure out what you want, and then you'll know what thoughts help you. Yo'ull be motivated to throw thoughts out when you know what you want (if you want anything)

For example. If you want to talk to a girl, obviously thoughts like "she will never talk to you" or "you will mess up" or "that was horrible" won't help you for the time you talk to that girl, or for the next time you do. 

I encountered the same issue with the ANT's idea. It isn't exactly foolproof for people who don't have a dualistic way of looking at thoughts.


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## bottleofblues (Aug 6, 2008)

I hear ya, i found his CBT to be overly simplistic. You're right sometimes negative thoughts are correct, like if you treated someone badly, maybe you need to acknowledge it: 'i was a jerk,etc'. And learn from that.
Important thing is to not let your thoughts get so distorted they exclusively focus on the negative, for me my thoughts can tend to do a bit of a runaway train type thing, if that makes sense.


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## Graveltone (Feb 12, 2014)

idk maybe it's because it doesn't really matter if "you blew it" or "she wont be interested in you" it may be true it may not be true. It don't matter. that's the thing.


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## kurtjb (Aug 27, 2010)

Dr. Richards uses the acronym "ANTs", but really, when Richards uses the term "Automatic Negative Thoughts", he is always referring to "Automatic Negative *Irrational* Thoughts". 

Certainly negative thoughts can be rational. For example, saying "Not all women will be interested in dating me" is both negative and rational. 

But people with SA tend to be *biased* towards negative thoughts when it comes to judgments from other people. There is a whole lot of empirical evidence for this. This bias is not conscious, but it results in "knee-jerk" negative thoughts that are overly pessimistic or paranoid. For example, in the case of Dr. Richards, he worried that people in neighboring cars were staring at him judgmentally as he drove. This bias towards overly negative thoughts and speculations is what the series tries to reduce.

With a woman you want to date, it's the ANTs that say, "She won't be interested in you." Rationality would say that dating is very similar to applying for jobs in many ways: 

- while rejection is pretty common, almost everyone ends up succeeding if they are persistent
- presenting yourself well (dressing attractively, nice haircut, good posture, good eye contact) improves your chances.
- the anxiety of the interviews (ie dates) goes down as you do more of them.
- You succeed faster if you prepare ahead of time and try to learn from each experience.

...And so on. If people would take some of the attitudes they have about getting a job and apply them to dating, they'd succeed more quickly.

Anyway, you wrote: "My 'ants' tell me nooone will give a **** about this post or even respond." Your ANTs appear to have been lying to you. Several people have cared and responded. 

The ANTs suggested you dwell on the worst possible interpretation of things -- which only dragged you down, making you feel bad, and for no good reason. They were wrong -- but believe me, that won't stop them next time. They'll try the same trick again, and again. They'll say, "Hey, how about you dwell on the worst possible outcome imaginable, and get yourself all depressed and negative?" It sure would be nice to turn to the ANTs and say, "Hey, how about I *NOT* dwell on the worst possible outcome imaginable? How about if I stop listening to your constant attempts to drag me down and make me anxious?"

The ANTs are like a really annoying, negative roommate. Whatever you do, the roommate always thinks up the worst possible outcome and expects you to dwell on it. Ask a girl out? He says, "Forget it, she'll just say no." Write a post? "Don't bother -- no one will answer." Try some new therapy? "Forget it -- it won't work." Have a picnic? "Don't bother -- it'll just rain."

In real life, if we had a roommate like that, we'd kick him out in about five minutes. Such a roommate makes "Debbie Downer" seem like an optimist.

The series is intended to help you identify your negatively-biased ANT thoughts, and to stop listening to them, or at the very least becoming very skeptical of them. As you listen to them less often, and are more skeptical, the "negative roommate" tends to become less and less noisy, and you tend to see life not so much "positively" or "negatively", but rationally. And for me, at least, that has led to greater happiness, less depression, and less SA.


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## jdrubnitz (Jan 26, 2013)

Basically, to be practical about it:

1. Decide what you desire
2. You will know what thoughts are worth throwing out or keeping.
a. if a thought does not help you work towards what you desire, it's obviously unhelpful


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## svartsaft (Feb 21, 2014)

jdrubnitz said:


> svartsaft,
> 
> forget about what's a lie or truth when it comes to these. Figure out what helps you. First figure out what you want, and then you'll know what thoughts help you. Yo'ull be motivated to throw thoughts out when you know what you want (if you want anything)
> 
> ...


thanks! that was very enlightning!


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## svartsaft (Feb 21, 2014)

jdrubnitz said:


> Basically, to be practical about it:
> 
> 1. Decide what you desire
> 2. You will know what thoughts are worth throwing out or keeping.
> a. if a thought does not help you work towards what you desire, it's obviously unhelpful


simply true! thanks!


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