# What could the opposite gender do to be more attractive?



## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

And be honest and detailed (no 'be more confident' or 'be yourself'). And I realize that everyone is different, and doing one thing might not impress one group. But, what would you think could be easily done to improve?

The way I look at it is that there are some simple things girls can do to be more approachable and interesting, but how many girls do them? Do they not realize it, or do they not want to attract guys. ( Try wearing a sundress and ponytail when it is warm enough... http://thestir.cafemom.com/love_sex/104796/screw_lingerie_theres_something_men )

But, I have no clue what I could do. At least physically. Do I need a tan, abs, and whiter teeth? Better eye contact an body language? http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/08/090824115811.htm
Or is it more of an alpha male thing, where you need to be looked up to by your male friends, teammates, co-workers, or fans. That you have other girls interested in you also? Do you need to show off that you have enough money to provide a stable fun life? That you are interesting and better than her girl friend's boyfriend. What am I doing wrong?


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## vegetarian (Dec 30, 2010)

Pretending to be confident and comfortable with yourself is the most important thing to attract the opposite sex. I read in a book that people unconsiously make more than 80% of their first impressions of a person within seconds of seeing them, you don't even have to say anything. The way you stand and express yourself attracts others i guess. Maybe flashing more smiles would help when seeing someone you find attractive? 

The guys I end up dating are always the ones that come up to me first. I hate making the first move and im sure im not the only one. I tend to date guys who are scruffy and have darker hair. I definately don't like men who go to the gym all the time and care about their appearance and weight. Its good when a guy cares about his health and maybe goes for a run sometimes but I'm not interested in the bench pressers. I would never be able to date a guy who tans for sure and I definately wouldnt like a guy with a 6 pack because I would feel kind of inferior and not good enough(maybe that part is just me). I like guys who aren't afraid to get dirty, ones that will be able to fix my car if it breaks down.


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## Kennnie (Oct 21, 2010)

vegetarian said:


> Pretending to be confident and comfortable with yourself is the most important thing to attract the opposite sex. I read in a book that people unconsiously make more than 80% of their first impressions of a person within seconds of seeing them, you don't even have to say anything. The way you stand and express yourself attracts others i guess.


 this i had so many girls approach me or made the first move. pretending to be confident and comfortable with yourself can make girls more attracted to you


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## heroin (Dec 10, 2010)

I can only speak for myself, but:

Be healthy. And by healthy I don't mean in peak physical shape, but don't be obese or anorexic. And this is more important for your own health than someone else liking you anyway, which is a secondary concern.

Don't expect the guy to be a knight in shining armour, i.e. save you from your SA, and generally take all your issues away. The guy is not your shrink.

Those are perhaps the only things I really care about. I don't care about dress sense, whether you are unfunny, or unconfident or have excessively low or high self-esteem, social skills or achievements.

If you're a conventionally poorly dressed woman who cannot crack jokes to save her life, are really intimidated by even the smallest of tasks, feel like you're ugly, have no friends and are a bum living under a bridge; that is all good.

None of that is a dealbreaker.


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## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

They could dye their hair red and start listening to alternative metal.


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## lonelyjew (Jan 20, 2010)

Have an "immature" sense of humor and be playful. Don't be judgmental of others. Don't obsess over clothes and weight, a *healthy* girl that enjoys being comfortable is very sexy. Be open about concerns and what you want, the guessing game is not fun. Tease, but don't go way overboard.

Most importantly though:

*Guys are all about ego: make use feel like we're the man! *


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## heroin (Dec 10, 2010)

lonelyjew said:


> *Guys are all about ego: make use feel like we're the man! *


Let me take the opportunity to remove myself from that group. I already know I am a/the man. I don't need other people to make me feel that.

Carry on.


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## Crystalline (Dec 1, 2008)

Open-minded, friendly, approachable guys are always more attractive to me. Humility and a sense of humor are big pluses. Be clean but not obsessively so. Gelled hair is a turnoff.


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

Thinking back recently, I've noticed what's been a turnoff in all genders.

When they're trying too hard with appearance is one. But also the opposite is true when they don't wash, gratuitously pick their noses, etc., in front of you. It shows lack of respect and any odours initiate my gag reflex and I become enraged (but contain it) from the invasion. Same if they spray a load of deodorant everywhere or household cleaners. Really upsets me because it makes me ill and is inconsiderate.

Other turnoffs are various traits such as being snobbish, judgemental, controlling, patronising, lacking basic reasoning skills, abusive, unreliable, inattentive, unemotional, selfish, seeing gender as binary, prejudiced, lacking humour, and apathetic. This isn't absolute, however, and they can be offset by other traits. Following the crowd/being a sheep's a turnoff. If someone knows and values themselves it can be attractive. But again, it's not absolute and depends on the person.

If you want the average human primate or just sex, then by all means get a tan, whiten teeth, and accumulate wealth etc. That should attract the relevant people.


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## Brightpaperwarewolf (Oct 16, 2008)

There's a chick I'm talking to, she keeps hooking me up with food for free. She's definitely winning my heart and stomach lol. Be unique, that's all I can say.


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## Post_Punk_Proclivity (Oct 12, 2008)

Be less temperamental. Gals sure know how to stomp their feet when they're in a bad mood.


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## rainbowOne (Sep 26, 2010)

Guys- if you want me to take you seriously, don't giggle away at your own private joke when you talk to me. I'll assume you're laughing at me and you're only talking to me for a dare.
DO - open doors for me, offer me help, stick up for me, etc - chivalry isn't dead and a guy who goes out of his way to be polite is so much more attractive than one who seems not to care.


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## Kakaka (Apr 7, 2010)

Don't act like a stereotypical "ladette". I don't mean being interested in sports or drinking pints, that's actually quite sexy. It's girls who are overly loud, obnoxious, intimidating, sarcastic, arrogant and don't have any real ambition or interests other than getting sh*t-faced on a Friday night.

And don't get stupid tattoos, you know what I mean: butterflies, paw prints... My first impression when I see these tattoos - you're a bit dim, don't have much creativity and aren't fussed about what gets etched onto your body for the rest of your life.

Interesting thread btw.


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## AlisonWonderland (Nov 4, 2010)

Personally, for me to consider a relationship with someone they'd have to pay me enough attention, but not enough for me to be considering a restraining order.
But tbh I don't think there's just one thing that an entire gender could do to be _more_ attractive. Some personality traits are ugly. Some faces are ugly. But there's always a good point, a beautiful part of someone - that's what you've got to work with. Ignore flaws, work with what you've got, stop trying to be something you aren't.

No real advice though. I like nice eyebrows on everyone


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## MagusAnima (Mar 4, 2010)

I enjoy a man who can use grammar correctly. :love2


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## Dub16 (Feb 28, 2010)

They could buy some "I love Dub16 under-wear" **




** This under-wear retails at 15.99 and is available from all good outlets globally


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## Misanthropic (Jun 25, 2010)

I know I'm repetitive but what turns me on most (personality wise) is women who are kind and compassionate, nurturing, non-judgmental, friendly towards you etc. This is extremely underrated. Everything else, confidence, a sense of humor, intelligence etc. is nice but secondary, it's far less important. I cannot stand women who are rude, mean, uncaring etc. I'm not trying to make a 'point', it's just how I feel.

As far as physical appearance, there's not much that can be done. I am attracted to women with smooth skin, pretty faces, appear healthy and athletic etc. Having big breasts and a supermodel body is unnecessary.

edit : ****tiness is also a turn on


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## Swanson (Sep 4, 2010)

Have opinions. There's nothing more unattractive than a guy who has no opinions on things that are happening in the world. No/weak opinions show me that he's not very thoughtful or intelligent.

Make decisions. At least have some idea of what you'd like to do if I ask. I hate being the one who has to make all the decisions about everything. It should be balanced. "Whatever you want to do" annoys me to no end. 

Develop good reasoning skills. If we're having a friendly argument and you reason like a moron, then I'm going to be turned off. Harsh, but true. 

Don't cheat EVER. As history of cheating automatically rules you out, no matter how charming you may be.


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## shynesshellasucks (May 10, 2008)

For me women just have to mainly worry about looking their best. If you are not in the best physical shape then workout. Buying nice clothes also help. There is only so much that could be done regarding facial beauty. But some men are different; some women that I may not be physically attracted to, other men may find attractive and vice versa. But looks should always be worked on to improve your chances in finding a partner. 

Regarding personality traits I can't offer much help because I don't interact with women enough to know what kind of personality traits I find attractive. Also, I don't like girls that smoke.


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

Look like Reso.  Hubba hubba!

But seriously, I think being easy going and down to earth is attractive. For example, I knew a guy who just plain didn't judge you for your faults and it was awesome. Also, don't judge yourself to harshly if you can help it. I guess what I'm going for here is friendly and low maintenance.


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## lonelyjew (Jan 20, 2010)

Thought of one most girls seem to like in guys: when a girl tells you about a problem, or a crappy situation, etc. usually she is only looking to vent, and for you to empathize with her. She is not looking for a solution, and coldly giving her one won't win you any favors. Be sympathetic, listen, and give her a hug, and you're golden .


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## jonny neurotic (Jan 20, 2011)

MagusAnima said:


> I enjoy a man who can use grammar correctly. :love2


A woman after my own heart.  lol


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## jonny neurotic (Jan 20, 2011)

I'd have to say knowing who you are and what you like and not taking any crap from anyone, especially not me. Also glitter and sparkly things are good. And being content enough not to say anything if there is a lull in the conversation. And smiling.


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## PandaPop (May 21, 2010)

I like someone whos really open minded, theres nothing more annoying that narrow minded judgmental people, even if its like a tiny little thing like a foreign film and they say 'well i don't watch a movie to read' that will highly annoy me LOL

and saying that a guy whos really into films blows my mind tbf. 

I also like someone who doesn't take himself too seriously, can be as immature as myself but of course theres a time to be serious sometimes but for the most part just be sarcastic and tease each other playfully. 

I also agree with having your own opinion too, its really annoying when someone just agrees with you with everything for the sake of being in your good books. Even when its like about a book or a film.


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## Paragon (Apr 13, 2010)

PandaPop said:


> and saying that a guy whos really into films blows my mind tbf.


Really? I'm really into films..... 
Hey... how *you* doin'?

 lol

The only girl i've met who likes films as much as me is related to me ffs lol. ehh going off-topic.



lonelyjew said:


> Thought of one most girls seem to like in guys: when a girl tells you about a problem, or a crappy situation, etc. usually she is only looking to vent, and for you to empathize with her. She is not looking for a solution, and coldly giving her one won't win you any favors. Be sympathetic, listen, and give her a hug, and you're golden .


Think that applies to people in general, maybe slightly more for girls though.. but yeah, usually they just want sympathy and comfort not advice


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## PandaPop (May 21, 2010)

Paragon said:


> Really? I'm really into films.....
> Hey... how *you* doin'?
> 
> lol
> ...


For sure, i have such a big dvd collection and i just love reading/talking/watching films. I love to build my knowledge on films every day hehe


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## fingertips (Jan 11, 2009)

i like a lady who can fly a hot air balloon.


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## ryobi (Jan 13, 2009)

defintely flying a hot air balloon
for sure


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## ValiantThor (Dec 6, 2010)

have awesome ninja skills


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## WTFnooooo (Mar 27, 2010)

vegetarian said:


> ...I definitely wouldn't like a guy with a 6 pack because I would feel kind of inferior and not good enough(maybe that part is just me)...


You are lying to yourself. You value having a six pack if not when it comes to having a bf with a six pack you wouldn't feel inferior in the first place. Solution = Get a six pack yourself(at least get fit) or reconsider you view about six packs.


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## cafune (Jan 11, 2011)

Swanson said:


> Have opinions. There's nothing more unattractive than a guy who has no opinions on things that are happening in the world. No/weak opinions show me that he's not very thoughtful or intelligent.
> 
> Make decisions. At least have some idea of what you'd like to do if I ask. I hate being the one who has to make all the decisions about everything. It should be balanced. "Whatever you want to do" annoys me to no end.
> 
> ...


:ditto

I agree completely!


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## Ape in space (May 31, 2010)

The list will be different for each guy, but here are a couple of major ones for me that I like to see in girls.

*Superficial stuff*: Keep your hair nice. By 'nice', I mean smooth/shiny and relatively well behaved. Hair is probably the first thing I notice on a girl, and even if I can't see her face, I will be turned on by the sight of nice hair alone.

*Non-superficial stuff*: In terms of personality, etc., the most attractive thing in a girl is for her to be affectionate. Being 'touchy' and 'huggy' is a definite turn-on; I fondly remember all 3 times in my life that a girl has hugged me. But being affectionate isn't only physical - you can be affectionate by being nice, caring and attentive.

These are the two biggest sources of attraction for me, and I think many guys would agree.


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## lonelygirl88 (Dec 25, 2009)

If you didn't have so many people in your gender that lived under the "hump 'em and/or dump 'em" philosophy...

Being more compassionate, sensitive, and understanding...


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

fingertips said:


> i like a lady who can fly a hot air balloon.


Me too, that's soo hot :whip


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## cafune (Jan 11, 2011)

Kakaka said:


> Don't act like a stereotypical "ladette". I don't mean being interested in sports or drinking pints, that's actually quite sexy. It's girls who are overly loud, obnoxious, intimidating, sarcastic, arrogant and don't have any real ambition or interests other than getting sh*t-faced on a Friday night.
> 
> And don't get stupid tattoos, you know what I mean: butterflies, paw prints... My first impression when I see these tattoos - you're a bit dim, don't have much creativity and aren't fussed about what gets etched onto your body for the rest of your life.
> 
> Interesting thread btw.


Honestly, I think the female should be able to act however she wants, if who she is, is a "ladette," then why shouldn't she be one? I don't think you should use one word to summarize what you think girls should not be... although, I can understand the characteristics that you don't appreciate in females. However, the idea of a female being intimidating, I think, is somewhat subjective. A person that some will find intimidating, will not be so intimidating to others. And about the female being sarcastic, why is that so wrong? It depends on how the sarcasm is used, is it somewhat teasing, or just biting? Sarcasm does not always have to be cold.

And about the "stupid tattoos," well, I think that some of those tattoos may be significant to their owners. A butterfly can connote a great deal of things. And how would you know how much thought they put into getting their tattoos?


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

Don't be glued to your phone - I like to think that you are a lone wolf like myself. Don't say you like bars - Automatic turnoff. Make decisions - I like a decisive guy. Don't wear fashionable clothes - Cheap jeans and hoodies are sexy. Refrain from looking at any other female in the vicinity while talking to me - You are definitely being tested on this and will earn points if you make me feel like I'm the only girl in the room. Be compassionate and kind - The whole jerk/careless act is very unattractive.


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## mrbojangles (Oct 8, 2009)

layitontheline said:


> Refrain from looking at any other female in the vicinity while talking to me - You are definitely being tested on this and will earn points if you make me feel like I'm the only girl in the room.


You can't fight nature :b


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## Kakaka (Apr 7, 2010)

Live Laugh Love said:


> Honestly, I think the female should be able to act however she wants, if who she is, is a "ladette," then why shouldn't she be one? I don't think you should use one word to summarize what you think girls should not be... although, I can understand the characteristics that you don't appreciate in females. However, the idea of a female being intimidating, I think, is somewhat subjective. A person that some will find intimidating, will not be so intimidating to others. And about the female being sarcastic, why is that so wrong? It depends on how the sarcasm is used, is it somewhat teasing, or just biting? Sarcasm does not always have to be cold.


Yeah, of course she can act like that if she wants and many do, but it's not attractive. Just as I can act like a total slob if I want but it's not attractive. Being overly loud, obnoxious, crass and arrogant are pretty much universally unattractive traits and that's also what I consider to be intimidating. Plus, when people ask where your girlfriend is you don't want to have to tell them she's throwing up in the car park, same as last week.

And yeah, I did mean cold sarcasm, rest of it's fine.



> And about the "stupid tattoos," well, I think that some of those tattoos may be significant to their owners. A butterfly can connote a great deal of things. And how would you know how much thought they put into getting their tattoos?


Because it's cliche. It's the female equivalent of the nautical star. So many people have them nowadays it's no longer an expression of individuality, which is what a tattoo should be.

Everyone I know with these tattoos did it because either her friend got one or "it's kinda cute" Both are pretty poor excuses for getting a tattoo. Your right though, I can't know for sure but I can take a pretty damn good guess. :yes


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## ryobi (Jan 13, 2009)

ValiantThor said:


> have awesome ninja skills


also a plus


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## Kennnie (Oct 21, 2010)

have abs like mike the "situation"


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## Starch (Dec 15, 2010)

I wet my panties for intelligent men. 

I'm not fussy with appearance, but no metrosexuals with gelled hair and sparkly tops plz.

Oh and GOOD MANNERS. Theyre so important.


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## Milco (Dec 12, 2009)

Starch said:


> I wet my panties for intelligent men.


Let me go get something to drink so I can do a spit-take :roll

I love girls that show curiosity about the world; thirst for knowledge and open-mindedness and not just conform.


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## ready (Sep 2, 2009)

Really, first thing is to take care of yourself. Bathe, wear decent clothes, keep your environment clean, stay in decent shape, etc. Tells a lot about who you are. I think it shows you have some pride in yourself and your appearance.

Second, personality-wise, be a nice and caring person. I feel like this is the most important thing. Don't be a complete pushover though. Having your own opinions, but being open to others is attractive.


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## Arisa1536 (Dec 8, 2009)

Well from my experience and this is not a generalization Men tend to like women who are Confident in their sexuality and i dunno enjoy sex and are easy going laid back type of girls. 

One girl i know has a massive sexual appetite and her boyfriend is very quiet and so is she, they basically do not speak they just spend every weekend in their room, or a batch, or the back of the car lol i dunno but it works for them and he thinks she is the best thing since sliced bread because she is not telling the world about her sexual exploits, she is well dressed and well mannered and happens to enjoy intimacy with her boyfriend ALOT and that is probably the best example i can give while trying to get my point across

Woops i misread the title, i thought i was a question as to what girls could do to be more attractive and vice versa, not what "turns you on?" so to speak

For me a shy guy who is very reserved and a little awkward and aloof really excites me because i feel totally un threatened and like i can be with him without him groping me and being all over eager before i am ready, that is a strong quality for me and very very very attractive :heart


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## spaceygirl (Dec 4, 2009)

Doing everything that you are NOT "supposed" to do. Be different, creative, unique. Don't give a sh** what people think of your hair. Be You. Don't listen to lists about things you are supposed to do to be more attractive. That will make you more attractive to someone. And to another person it will make you significantly less attractive.

This thread make baby jesus cry.


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

^ How about smearing excrement in one's hair? Come on, you know you have some standards and criteria of your own. Or am I failing to read between the lines?


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## tutliputli (Feb 22, 2009)

^ What kind of excrement?


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

Wabbit.


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## spaceygirl (Dec 4, 2009)

considering scat websites, I am guessing there are quite a few people who would enjoy that :um (er, not that I've been going to those sites to know..)


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## goldylox (Feb 1, 2011)

I know a guy who is pretty attractive looking and has a cool laid back style ,however he waxes his eyebrows and gets manicures!blah,that is a huge turnoff for me. He is a big guy always in the gym training,so I thought it was odd he did that. I also cannot stand a guy to have fingernails that are not nice and short,if they are even a little long it is totally grotesque.


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## Cyber Lume (Sep 19, 2010)

Mind your health and hygiene, please. It works wonders.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

Arisa1536 said:


> One girl i know has a massive sexual appetite and her boyfriend is very quiet and so is she, they basically do not speak they just spend every weekend in their room, or a batch, or the back of the car lol i dunno but it works for them and he thinks she is the best thing since sliced bread because she is not telling the world about her sexual exploits, she is well dressed and well mannered and happens to enjoy intimacy with her boyfriend ALOT and that is probably the best example i can give while trying to get my point across


 That's the dream isn't it?


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## Its Not Me Its You (Dec 30, 2010)

Don't be a sook. Nothing turns me off more than a sooky la la man. I dont want to be your mother. Also be a decision maker, if you have an opinion, give it. Nothing bugs me more than the monotonous "what ever you like" or "I'm happy with whatever you decide" :roll


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## pariahgirl (Mar 26, 2008)

Read more and don't have kanji tatoos if you cannot speak japanese. I know you think it makes you look cool and exotic but please resist.


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## EJ24R (Jan 31, 2011)

Brightpaperwarewolf said:


> There's a chick I'm talking to, she keeps hooking me up with food for free. She's definitely winning my heart and stomach lol. Be unique, that's all I can say.


^this


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## David777 (Feb 6, 2011)

Just, please, no tattoos!

For me when I see a woman with a tattoo it is a major turn off!!!


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## Jessie203 (Feb 20, 2008)

Have a lot of money and a really big ........ heart lol 

Honestly, I think attractiveness is very specific and differs from one person to another. It's all preference. Be who you want to be and be happy. If you're doing good for yourself, are not self-destructive or mean to others, and are genuinely happy in life somebody is going to want to jump on it. That's my opinion haha.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

kathy903 said:


> Honestly, I think attractiveness is very specific and differs from one person to another. It's all preference.


So what is your preference?  Do you find that there are any traits or appearance characteristics that would make you be happy to talk to them instead of thinking that they are creepy?

I'm sure there will always be someone else out there that will like the combination of things you do or how you appear, but I am looking for simple patterns in what individuals like.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

goldylox said:


> I also cannot stand a guy to have fingernails that are not nice and short,if they are even a little long it is totally grotesque.


I am a guitarist, therefore I don't trim the fingernails on my playing hand. Would that be a turnoff?


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## Jessie203 (Feb 20, 2008)

Classified said:


> So what is your preference?  Do you find that there are any traits or appearance characteristics that would make you be happy to talk to them instead of thinking that they are creepy?
> 
> I'm sure there will always be someone else out there that will like the combination of things you do or how you appear, but I am looking for simple patterns in what individuals like.


 Since youre asking.. I LIKE
Friendliness
Good sense of humour
Sarcasm
Intelligence
Ambition
Stability
Maybe a bit nerdiness lol
Doesn't interrupt you in the middle of a sentence
Eye contact (but not too much, then its scary haha)

cant think of any more personality traits... onto the superficial crap..this is just stuff that gets me if ive never said a word to them in my life and i see them and go woooow lol..once you get to know someone obviously these things are debatable --except the teeth and smelling good!!!!!! Not debatable hahaa
Clean teeth,, super clean.. its my obsession lol
Smells good..b.o aint right naaaa mean haha
Height (i like them tall, not that matters too much though..ive dated shorter guys too)
pretty eyes and lips... that sounds messed tlaking about guys but nice lips are awesome!! chapped lips are nasty not worth kissing... its like making out with sandpaper

Thats all i got for now.. i dont think about these things too much lol and now my brain is rattled haha!!!


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## kentcharm (Feb 2, 2011)

Everyone's different, buddy. You only need to find ONE girl in this entire world for yourself. Contrary to popular belief, it's not that hard. Just be open to new things, be accepting of others, and love yourself.

Personally, I love all men. They are adorable, even with all of their faults.  If you are nice to me and act like a gentleman from time to time, I will love you. I'm pretty sure a lot of girls can say the same. Instead of stressing on finding a girlfriend, work on making yourself happier and healthier. When you love yourself, everything in life just fits into place. 

Sorry if this sounds like the generic bull**** you hear everywhere, but its true.


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## silvercobra101 (Mar 25, 2010)

I like girls who are unique in some way. Girls who are happy as girls and don't try to be guys are the best. Masculinity is a definite turn-off. 

I am more attracted to girls who wear skirts or dresses than those who don't. Short hair can be attractive if done properly, but often it is not. If the right effect can be achieved, girls with short hair are absolutely stunning. If the effect misses by just a little, they look like Janet Reno.

Smoking, swearing, too much makeup and bad manners and excessive tattoos are turn-offs. Smiling and laughing are turn-ons.


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## stranger25 (Apr 29, 2010)

kathy903 said:


> Have a lot of money


http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/1821921-post85.html


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## juicyjuice11 (Feb 28, 2011)

I think that all men are different in their own right, but most men are oblivious as to what goes on in a woman's mind. In my opinion in order for men to be more attractive they really need to make a real effort to understand a woman's mind, body and soul. Learn our emotions and the hidden meanings behinds the things that we say, this would help a lot of relationships to I bet.


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

> Its good when a guy cares about his health and maybe goes for a run sometimes but I'm not interested in the bench pressers. I would never be able to date a guy who tans for sure and I definitely wouldn't like a guy with a 6 pack because I would feel kind of inferior and not good enough(maybe that part is just me).


I'm a girl and 100% agree with this. I know there are some guys that feel insecure about being "skinny", and I'd just like to say that the only girls that like guys with super buff bodies are the girls that are extremely shallow themselves, and probably kill themselves or bankrupt their finances to look perfect...or both.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

juicyjuice11 said:


> I think that all men are different in their own right, but most men are oblivious as to what goes on in a woman's mind. In my opinion in order for men to be more attractive they really need to make a real effort to understand a woman's mind, body and soul. Learn our emotions and the hidden meanings behinds the things that we say, this would help a lot of relationships to I bet.


Hidden meanings, lol, that is ridiculous. Anyone deliberately cryptic doesn't deserve to be figured out, IMO.


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

> According to a survey _by Cotton Incorporated_, men would prefer a sundress to almost any other summer attire.


I think Cotton Inc. likely wanted to put out a story like this to encourage girls to buy sundresses which are made of, of course- cotton.

I don't know if I trust this study.



> In my opinion in order for men to be more attractive they really need to make a real effort to understand a woman's mind, body and soul.


I agree that to be attractive a guy should try to understand my mind, but I don't know about body and soul...and come to think of it- I don't think ANY guy minds learning to understand our bodies, lol 

I don't agree with some of the other things you said- I don't think guys should be expected to decode hidden meanings. We both should try to communicate as clearly as possible. That's what makes a good relationship IMO.



> Anyone deliberately cryptic doesn't deserve to be figured out, IMO.


I agree with your this.


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## RUFB2327 (Sep 28, 2008)

thekloWN said:


> Hidden meanings, lol, that is ridiculous. Anyone deliberately cryptic doesn't deserve to be figured out, IMO.


I completely agree. That makes no sense at all. Don't say something and expect a guy to figure out some secret code. If you want a guy to know something, just tell him what you are thinking. Simple things like that shouldnt be made into a guessing game


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

mcmuffinme said:


> I think Cotton Inc. likely wanted to put out a story like this to encourage girls to buy sundresses which are made of, of course- cotton.
> 
> I don't know if I trust this study.


I think the guys here will agree with the study though. That is the main reason I started this thread. As a woman you might not realize what men find attractive, and as a man, I don't know what women are looking for. Why do they scream at Justin Bieber concerts and have no problem dating ugly guys with lots of money?

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ezK2JyyvuhI/SrJItK68-fI/AAAAAAAAAOA/ivo1bADu2TA/s1600-h/Women_Dresses.jpg

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ezK2JyyvuhI/SrJIS0jjZnI/AAAAAAAAANw/yvg2Bjh2nT0/s1600-h/Women_Dresses.jpg

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ezK2JyyvuhI/SrJIGlhc0sI/AAAAAAAAANo/72wnc9UK1LI/s1600-h/Women_Dresses.jpg

Is there any straight guy here that doesn't find these women to be attractive? I think it also says a lot about the personality of a girl if she feels good wearing them as well.

(* For the people who are living in the snow covered tundra regions I'm sorry for posting these pictures. There are only a few more weeks until spring)


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

wrap themselves in a banner that says "I know how to change the empty toilet roll spindle"


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

Classified said:


> I think it also says a lot about the personality of a girl if she feels good wearing them as well.


I would have hoped all it says is the weather's very hot or it's comfortable. If she's wearing it for another reason it's a turnoff. I find trying to look sexy to be a turnoff. But then I don't count, so don't worry.


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## silvercobra101 (Mar 25, 2010)

Classified said:


> Is there any straight guy here that doesn't find these women to be attractive? I think it also says a lot about the personality of a girl if she feels good wearing them as well.
> 
> (* For the people who are living in the snow covered tundra regions I'm sorry for posting these pictures. There are only a few more weeks until spring)


A few more weeks until spring. Ha! That's what you say. We'll have snow until May.

I completely agree with the summer dress thing. I kind of mentioned it in my post, but I find any girl wearing a dress to be more attractive than a girl not wearing a dress. Dresses are becoming to a woman. Not to say that a woman can't be attractive in pants, but they will always be less so in my opinion. I'd rather see a woman in a long dress than in short shorts.

And I think the summer dress does say a lot about the personality. I do agree that it isn't so attractive if she is trying to look sexy, but it says to me that a woman wearing a summer dress (1) is comfortable with her gender, (2) is a cheerful person and (3) cares about her appearance but isn't really trying to look provocative.

But obviously you can't judge someone's personality 100% by what they are wearing.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

odd_one_out said:


> I would have hoped all it says is the weather's very hot or it's comfortable. If she's wearing it for another reason it's a turnoff. I find trying to look sexy to be a turnoff. But then I don't count, so don't worry.


Comfortable, simple, laid back, good self body image, and cute.


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## Crystalline (Dec 1, 2008)

silvercobra101 said:


> but it says to me that a woman wearing a summer dress (1) is comfortable with her gender


Because dresses define a gender amirite :roll

FYI I wear slip dresses more on average than many regular women here in the Philippines do and I'm not very feminine in personality (heck a lot less than the average Filipina), but I have that luxury because I don't tramp around a lot on the streets and get them dirty. If I had to walk in a city as dirty as this one a lot I'd obviously wear slacks and khakis more and a pair of slacks is my default choice if I'm going somewhere that needs it. A simple dress is more physically comfortable in warm weather (and convenient) to wear than jeans and a top, contrary to what people think. All you do is pull it over your head and going to the bathroom doesn't require as much er, effort. Matching and accessorizing is also easier. But women don't just stand around looking pretty. We have to work and go places (surprise surprise). Utility plays a huge part in clothing choices too of course.


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## nothing to fear (Mar 23, 2005)

thekloWN said:


> Hidden meanings, lol, that is ridiculous. Anyone deliberately cryptic doesn't deserve to be figured out, IMO.


Agreed. The "deliberately" part is important too since I'm sure most people are cryptic at some times but that is different. It would be extremely confusing and difficult to always have to decipher the hidden meanings of a person's words and actions and I would hate if someone did that to me (think that everything I say has a hidden meaning). Anyway it's not like woman are a single, different species that has to be "figured out".
(By the way, not trying to put words in the mouth of the member of that original post, that's just how I interpret it when people say that sort of thing.)

I actually think it's important for a guy to understand or attempt to understand a woman's body, how it works (etc). Since there are differences that they really might not know anything about. 
I bet there are even some guys out there who refuse to believe or acknowledge that women go poo and fart. =P


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## purplestuff33 (Mar 1, 2011)

I think all guys are different,but I really like guys who are chivalrous. It also helps if they're cute and smart.


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## RyanAdams (Aug 15, 2008)

I am truly doomed:lol


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

Classified said:


> Comfortable, simple, laid back, good self body image, and cute.


Yes. But since other clothing can do the same I'm wondering what it is that makes such dresses particularly appealing. Is it the way they seem to provide more access to the body and less of a visual barrier (since it shows their body shape, yet is more tasteful since it isn't blatantly displaying flesh like tight mini skirts etc.), and is therefore sexual in essence (but catering to a certain taste)?



Crystalline said:


> FYI I wear slip dresses more on average than many regular women here in the Philippines do and I'm not very feminine in personality (heck a lot less than the average Filipina), but I have that luxury because I don't tramp around a lot on the streets and get them dirty.


That's interesting. I hope you don't mind this question: Are you able to wear them without experiencing dysphoria? I've known of a couple of women able to do this even when they don't feel feminine or even identify as female. Do you think it gets you perceived less accurately?



Crystalline said:


> Because dresses define a gender amirite


I'm afraid in some cultures they are virtually considered that way - look at how they use symbols of stick figures in dresses and trousers to indicate male and female toilets etc.

In some places, however, men wear things like muumuus without risking attack. My old neighbour, a doctor, would walk around London in one. Maybe his weight made it too comfortable an option in such heat:


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## BetaBoy90 (Jan 5, 2010)

Randomly flash me if you see me in the street, anyone is welcome, even children....


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## Crystalline (Dec 1, 2008)

odd_one_out said:


> That's interesting. I hope you don't mind this question: Are you able to wear them without experiencing dysphoria? I've known of a couple of women able to do this even when they don't feel feminine or even identify as female. Do you think it gets you perceived less accurately?


As someone who actively dislikes the sex they were born with but feels that I can do little to change my circumstances I already feel this way regardless of what I wear in public. How I present myself now doesn't really have much of an impact on how I feel, possibly because I don't intend for strangers to perceive me as other than feminine or female. In this conservative Catholic country it's a personal issue I don't want others sticking their noses into. I've already been chided to act more female by a friend, and though that was years ago, it just serves as a reminder that people here are not very accepting of anything outside their perceived norms. I also feel a considerable disconnect between my physical appearance and my self, which I perceive is more androgynous.

(Edit: I already went through a more androgynous phase of dressing years ago, but that also coincided with my eating disorder.)


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## silvercobra101 (Mar 25, 2010)

Well, I suppose the relation of the type of clothing you wear to the gender that you identify with is dependent on culture. I should clarify that in most western cultures, a woman wearing a dress appears to be more comfortable with her gender than one who does not. Meanwhile, if a guy wears a dress, he is almost certainly not comfortable with his gender. In other parts of the world that doesn't work the same way, though.


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## Toad Licker (Nov 2, 2007)

Show us your big beautiful smile!


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

Wear a t shirt that says "They Call Me Dr. Love". 

or, wear a banner that says "will wash many things for love". or words to that effect.


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## BetaBoy90 (Jan 5, 2010)

Females could try imitating Rosie O'Donnell. that's a surefire way of getting any heterosexual guys nether regions to perk up.


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## Atticus (Nov 10, 2003)

Don't make an *effort* to be like men. Be who you are, and if your interests or style are similar to men's then by all means be that to the best of your ability. But when women *try* to be like men, they often imitate the worst caricatures of men and it's just awkward.

So I guess to thine own self and all that.


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