# Imagined interactions?



## Chelse (Apr 13, 2013)

According to wikipedia, Imagined interactions are when individuals imagine themselves in anticipated or recalled interaction with others....which allows one to talk to oneself and imagine talking to others as well.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imagined_interaction

I have done this as long as I can remember. Every morning I imagine a conversation I might have during that day and I go over it again and again. Or, I will recall a conversation that went bad for me, and I will usually fix it in my head. Its been associated with SA, as a coping mechanism for not having real conversations or dealing with previous ones that went wrong.

I guess I don't see it as being a problem but is this common for others with SA?


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## lamboftartary (Jan 25, 2013)

yeah, well I've been doing it all my life..


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## jennyrsand (Mar 3, 2013)

i do that


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## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

Ever since the 7th grade which is when everything came about for me.


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## Phalene (Feb 15, 2013)

Thanks for the link, I did not even know there was a name for that.

I often replay convos I had with people, convos in which I didn't manage to be clear or assertive. Like the OP, I try to "fix" things to feel better.

I also often imagine conversations with this guy I was really in love with, amazingly cheesy stuff in which I am more confident, less ugly etc. It is a sad fantasy, really.


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## lad (Sep 26, 2011)

It's common with everyone.


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## graymatter (Mar 31, 2011)

Yeah, but I never knew there was so much information about it.

I frequently imagine future interactions, which in real life often go in a very different direction than I imagined.

I dwell on past conversations a lot too, sometimes I try to "fix" them, but I usually replay them as they were and relive the terror of my mistakes.


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## Chelse (Apr 13, 2013)

Phalene said:


> Thanks for the link, I did not even know there was a name for that.
> 
> I often replay convos I had with people, convos in which I didn't manage to be clear or assertive. Like the OP, I try to "fix" things to feel better.
> 
> I also often imagine conversations with this guy I was really in love with, amazingly cheesy stuff in which I am more confident, less ugly etc. It is a sad fantasy, really.


This is basically what I do too. I didn't know there was that much information on it either, I happened to stumble across it a few weeks ago. I couldn't believe how accurate and true it was!


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## Chelse (Apr 13, 2013)

Thanks for replying everyone! I've been curious about this for awhile, because I have done this for so long.


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## Vuldoc (Sep 8, 2011)

I do this more than I'd like to since if they actually happen in real life things never go as "smoothly" as they do in my imagined situation.


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## cephalexin (Nov 26, 2012)

I've seen people without SA say they do this. In my experience, I find it therapeutic and helps me to practice interactions with people the next time I see them. As long as this isn't a delusional act where you believe you're actually talking to that person then it seems perfectly okay to me.

Of course, there's a limit to where I find myself doing it way too much and have to temporarily stop myself.

Overall I find it a generally beneficial thing to do.


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## RoseWhiteRoseRed (Apr 14, 2013)

I do this quite often, which I hate but I caan't help it though. like I can't stop myself from doing this


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## slytherin (Dec 30, 2012)

All the time. I find if I do it too much before actually talking to someone I get extra weird though, because it's like I've made a script in my head for how the interaction should go. And when it inevitably doesn't stick to the script I get freaked out and am extra weird!


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## tbyrfan (Feb 24, 2011)

I've always done this.


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## Learn to Fly (Feb 28, 2013)

I do that too. If I notice I'm doing it I try to stop because I know the conversation won't actually happen the way I imagine.


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## CW1985 (Jan 6, 2013)

I do this all the time. I often think about the way I'm going to greet my friend the next time I see her (assuming there will be a next time, because things aren't exactly great right now).

I picture hugging her and saying out loud what I plan on saying on the day.


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## getsomeair (Feb 1, 2013)

So normal people don't have them?


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## PurrPanther (Nov 16, 2012)

I have them sometimes....mostly about people saying stuff to me...so in my mind, I imagine what the hell would I respond to them if they said that. Then bam they say that exact ****ing thing I imagined them saying....people can be quite predictable.


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## MurrayJ (Sep 5, 2012)

Same here. It's like a second life we want to live.


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## StormChaser (Apr 26, 2013)

I tend to imagine how my whole day will start before i start it.


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## Mokuren (Apr 4, 2013)

i used to do it a lot be haven't recently. might be because of a lack of socializing and 'base' conversations to spark off the imagined interactions. Still do it but not as often.


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## KumaKhameleon (Apr 18, 2013)

WOW! I really thought I was nuts, and the only one who does this. Phew, guess not. 

My planned conversations never go as well in real life though... XD


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## KumaKhameleon (Apr 18, 2013)

slytherin said:


> All the time. I find if I do it too much before actually talking to someone I get extra weird though, because it's like I've made a script in my head for how the interaction should go. And when it inevitably doesn't stick to the script I get freaked out and am extra weird!


^GET OUT OF MY HEADDD. :shock

Seriously though, this is what I do every day of my life. And people rarely stick to my script either, if that makes you feel any better. :teeth


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## KnivesOut (Apr 26, 2013)

Yea all the time, and these damn "conversations" keep me from going to sleep. LoL


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## vulgarrobot (Jul 23, 2012)

KnivesOut said:


> Yea all the time, and these damn "conversations" keep me from going to sleep. LoL


same


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## zomgz (Aug 17, 2009)

Wow there's a name for this? I always thought my fantasy world just somehow merged with the real world. I honestly can't tell the difference anymore.


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## SpyNumber403 (Apr 21, 2013)

Yes, doing it afterwards is nice and heartwarming because you always get to win. Doing it before is something I've always done as well.

Let me tell you from experience of doing this a ton and then stopping it because i figured it was destructive and making me more mental: It actually greatly helps my social interactions. It takes away a lot of the fear of the unknown. 

I think this is a completely healthy behavior. I bet it even helps people learn certain social cues and things.


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## Perkins (Dec 14, 2010)

I do this all the time. No, seriously.


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## NoHeart (May 5, 2012)

This is what has kept me ( relatively ) sane for the past 5 years or so.


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## Haruhi (Jul 8, 2011)

all the time lately, i feel as if i'm going crazy >.<


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## chameleon persona (Mar 20, 2013)

i do this too, although i sometimes forget that im talking to myself lol


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## TrueColor (Apr 21, 2013)

I do this too... 

I also pre-prepare a list of topics for 'casual' conversation.. e.g. if am gonna meet a friend in a public place & know I'll be so anxious my mind will go blank... at least I'll have a mental list to fall back on.


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## melodielemon (Apr 30, 2013)

Chelse said:


> According to wikipedia, Imagined interactions are when individuals imagine themselves in anticipated or recalled interaction with others....which allows one to talk to oneself and imagine talking to others as well.
> 
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imagined_interaction
> 
> ...


This sounds EXACTLY like me


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## I wish i was normal (May 28, 2012)

I'm so amazingly confident in my imagined interactions. Then when i leave this dream scenario and return to reality, i feel extremely depressed. So i'd rather i didn't have them, but i can't stop it!


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## shorty28562 (Jul 7, 2008)

slytherin said:


> All the time. I find if I do it too much before actually talking to someone I get extra weird though, because it's like I've made a script in my head for how the interaction should go. And when it inevitably doesn't stick to the script I get freaked out and am extra weird!


That's exactly what happens to me...it sucks


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## cozynights (Mar 19, 2013)

Everyone does that. And this sounds freaky I have actually seen my made-up conversations become real a few times, almost the exact same way I imagined them to be.


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## SaikoSakura382 (Nov 8, 2011)

Not only do I feel better knowing there's a name for this, but also knowing I'm not the only one. I do this all the time, and it's really starting to mess with me. I'll imagine a conversation with someone, then a few days latter I can't remember if it really happened or if I imagined it. Frustrates me to no end.


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## SantiagoM (May 2, 2013)

I do it all the time.

I imagine myself being with people I want to be with and talking to them ... it's like living another life


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## Socialanxiety11 (Oct 3, 2011)

So THAT'S what it's called! I do that everyday. However, mine get really bad.


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## thebadshepard (Oct 13, 2012)

all day errry day!


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## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

SantiagoM said:


> I do it all the time.
> 
> I imagine myself being with people I want to be with and talking to them ... it's like living another life


I am like this as well.


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## Steve123 (Sep 13, 2009)

Oh gosh, I do that too. I have had more imaginary arguments with people than real ones! I'll often end up making myself angry with someone just because of some imagined event in my head. Probably not healthy but it's one of my quirks.


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## Twinkiesex (Apr 12, 2013)

I've done this too, I had no idea that it was a thing though...I thought I was just weird.

I normally do it because my conversations with people tend to be very vapid. Work, weather, politics...It's all the same thing every day. So sometimes I like to imagine deeper, more personal conversations with people. Like, what would happen of I told someone how I was really feeling, as opposed to how I'm "supposed" to feel about something because I don't want to make them uncomfortable or offend them.


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## Consider (May 1, 2013)

I'd be willing to bet a dollar that every person on this planet actuates these practices to some degree.


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

I used to do it a lot more, but my imagination has run more or less dry. It's kind of depressing. I would use my imagination to sort of escape. In my daydreams I could live a life beyond this one. 

I remember in junior high and sometimes even high school just receding into my mind during class, imagining going on adventures or finding romance, and just totally dreaming away the entire day. 

Definitely one of my favorite coping mechanisms. Really, it doesn't cause much harm at all outside wasting a bit of time. All in all, I kind of look fondly on the days when I had a stronger drive to live in fantasy. I guess all the fantasies began to get redundant and I noticed recurring themes and patterns and I eventually got sick of it. I wish I could go back to when it all felt new, and I could enjoy the boundless recesses of my mind.


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## mike91 (Sep 23, 2012)

i do this all the time i never knew if i am working alone i do this but i just think it never say it out loud


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## maninabox (Aug 23, 2012)

Hmm I do this, but I always related it to my OCD.


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## AHolivier (Aug 6, 2009)

I do this every day!


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## ToucanSam (Mar 22, 2012)

maninabox said:


> Hmm I do this, but I always related it to my OCD.


I'm a little bit OCD, and have always suspected the same thing, because I will often repeat my self-conversations over and over, like an actor practicing his lines.

Although for me, it's not imagined - I often speak the conversation out loud. And, I'm terrified that someone will see me do it.


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## Chelse (Apr 13, 2013)

I wish i was normal said:


> I'm so amazingly confident in my imagined interactions. Then when i leave this dream scenario and return to reality, i feel extremely depressed. So i'd rather i didn't have them, but i can't stop it!


Same! I wish I could stop but I don't even know I'm doing it sometimes


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## Chelse (Apr 13, 2013)

thebadshepard said:


> all day errry day!


Ha, same here!!


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## Sirenz (Dec 9, 2011)

Every day, I am extremely confident during these imaginary conversations like a really outgoing person would be :b Some of them are possible situations or things I might want to say in a conversation with someone and some of them have nothing to do with possible upcoming conversations though they just are the same thing over and over. They used to be out loud but I get worried about someone hearing me. I just kind of pace around saying them in my head. I wish I could feel comfortable talking with people rather than hoping they don't say anything to me, they go nothing like these imagined ones if they even ever happen.


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## londonguy202 (Jan 10, 2014)

Chelse said:


> According to wikipedia, Imagined interactions are when individuals imagine themselves in anticipated or recalled interaction with others....which allows one to talk to oneself and imagine talking to others as well.
> 
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imagined_interaction
> 
> ...


I do that too, love when that happens


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## fineline (Oct 21, 2011)

Chelse said:


> According to wikipedia, Imagined interactions are when individuals imagine themselves in anticipated or recalled interaction with others....which allows one to talk to oneself and imagine talking to others as well.
> 
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imagined_interaction
> 
> ...


i do this nearly every day. for the past 3-4 years.


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## anxious87 (Oct 6, 2013)

I do this quite often, but didn't realize it had been studied extensively. They can be fun sometimes, but they make it difficult to focus on other things. Makes me feel less crazy though knowing others do it too.


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## Gelisa (Jun 13, 2011)

I do this all the time, for as long as I can remember.


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## GrainneR (Feb 7, 2014)

Oh yeah, definitely do this. Although these imagined interactions can often be the only time I speak in a day, I kind of wish I could stop. In these fantasies, I sometimes imagine that someone cares about me, finds me interesting, or wants to hang out or be friends with me. It feels nice during the fantasy. The problem is when I come crashing back to reality, and I have no friends and only a few acquaintances to talk to every once on a while. It's like a rude awakening; like how I imagine it would feel like if a loved one died, and you dreamt about them, only to wake up and realize that they're gone.


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## Blueshad (Mar 25, 2014)

I think it can actually help. You can imagine having a good conversation to prepare yourself for talking to people. I works for me!


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## lisbeth (May 18, 2012)

I do this constantly. Mostly it's imagined confrontations. Figuring out what I'd say and how I'd manage to hold my ground if people verbally attacked me. Pretty often it's people I haven't seen in months or years and probably won't see again, much less be confronted by, but my brain doesn't seem to realise that and still carries this sense of threat around. I get myself really worked up about it to the point where I actually start having that kind of racing heart fight-or-flight reaction, and I'm sitting in an empty room on my own without having opened my mouth. The mental conversations I have are always threatening and negative. I always seem to convince myself people are carrying a grudge against me and only biding their time before they let it out. I start getting into this spiral of trying to figure out what they're thinking about me, which is always horribly critical, and this imagined blow gets more and more exaggerated and complicated until I get more and more stressed out because there's no way for me to counter it and this imaginary person is really laying into me. So I feel like I have to keep constantly preparing for this outcome that'll probably never arise, over and over again until I can get it right.

It's a very bad habit and probably says a lot about me as a person.


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## oood (Nov 1, 2012)

I enact interactions mostly through my dreams and I usually end up having the best time, sad as it is. Recently they've become so vivid I get the same satisfaction as from real life socializing


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## lonelyalways (Jun 19, 2012)

I do this all the time. The worst part is the good interactions I have in my head never come true. In reality, nobody is interested in anything i have to say. I get one word answers then they walk away from me. However, If I think something negative, it always comes true. That interaction plays out exactly like the one in my head.


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## tronjheim (Oct 21, 2012)

Been doing this since late grade school. It's only in recent years that I do this as a means of self-comfort or escape.


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## blacknight112 (Dec 11, 2013)

Had it since the 5th grade and it's practically everyday now and want it to stop and start having real interactions.


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## kuze (Mar 25, 2014)

This happens to me every night before going to sleep In my head I talk to so many people lol


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## Noll (Mar 29, 2011)

All the time, everyday.


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## SapphireMeadow (Feb 8, 2011)

I do this all the time, especially for the ones that went wrong :yes


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