# How many relationships have you had?



## newfoundglory

0.... 1.... 2.... 3.... more? :um


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## Icon of Sin

0. 

Relationship? What's that?


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## Carbon Breather

Zero


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## Inturmal

1.


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## BeNice

Two... almost three. Really, almost one. I can't really say. They were all girls I met on the internet and only had brief moments with. When I think relationship I think something that is lasting and you spend every night together for months in a row, not a couple of days.


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## thecurerules

0.


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## ShesKrayZ

Keep in mind that I'm 38 and at 17 my answer would have been zero and at 22 my answer would have been one. I've had two really serious long term relationships. I've had six not so serious dating type relationships. I currently am in a serious relationship that has lasted all of two weeks so far so :
2 + 6 + 1 = 9
Do I win anything?


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## anonymid

I'm sort of entering what I think is number two, but it's a complicated situation and I don't know what to call it, exactly (though it's a very good thing regardless). Can I say one-and-a-half?


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## Carbon Breather

ShesKrayZ said:


> Keep in mind that I'm 38 and at 17 my answer would have been zero and at 22 my answer would have been one. I've had two really serious long term relationships. I've had six not so serious dating type relationships. I currently am in a serious relationship that has lasted all of two weeks so far so :
> 2 + 6 + 1 = 9
> Do I win anything?


Well. Now i'm confused . I've had my chances but that was when i went to school and could meet girls. Now i go to work (95% guys) then home and sometimes to a party but almost always with people i already know.

I see it as much harder to meet someone now compared to when i was younger.


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## Drella

0.


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## James of Maine

In broadly-defined terms, three.

One non-serious dating relationship, one non-serious hookup, and one serious dating relationship that turned into marriage, which is my present situation. The first two occurred and the third began all within a 3 month period when I was 20, just turning 21. My dating life as a single was very, very short.

(edited for spelling and clarity)


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## archaic

I've casually dated a few people, but have really only been in one "relationship."


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## green and lonely

Just one.


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## ColdFury

Zero


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## Lonelyguy

I'm just a few weeks away from turning 31 and I've never been on a date or done anything intimate with a woman. I only know of a few people here who can match or top my record.


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## Amande

0.


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## Chopkinsca

Maybe half of one? I don't know, maybe I was just really confused back then. Oh well.


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## mserychic

On #2


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## MissChocolateMilkshake

I had two relationships. They were bad relationships. I have never had a guy who would treat me like a queen. Always get the jerks to come up to me.


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## whiteclouds

A big fat ZERO.


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## Buerhle

hmm, depends really, but I guess 4 :con


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## Mikey

None. Ever. Probably. Will. Never. Have. One.


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## estse

Zero!!!! :banana


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## Zephyr

Didn't we have exactly this thread just a couple of weeks ago?

Anyway, zero for me obviously. Social anxiety etc.....


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## Noca

Two


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## Argo

Zero.


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## Lyric Suite

Almost one...


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## WineKitty

Hmmm...Like ShesKrayz, I am older than lots of the posters here at SAS, so naturally my answer will be higher. As for relationships, about 10 :stu . I am not sure what the exact definition of this is, so this number is quite variable.


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## CaptainQuirk

almost one


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## ShyFX

if you count the girl who appointed me her boyfriend in grade 3, then 2.


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## umbrellagirl1980

i guess it really depends on the definition of 'relationship'. i think i've had about 3.


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## matt404

I guess I'll go ahead and join the "Zero" crowd.


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## NewWorldOrder

Just one


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## VelvetElvis

None. No surprises there.


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## shyguydan

ShyFX said:


> if you count the girl who appointed me her boyfriend in grade 3, then 2.


lol yeah I remember I had a couple of girls that appointed me their boyfriend when I was younger

but in reality, I have had 1 serious relationship, 2 semi-serious ones, and I have dated casually(but nothing came out of it because of SA)[/b]


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## shyguydan

:dd


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## Guitaraholic187

I've had two.


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## Shinji

I've been in 4 relationships, counting the one i'm in now, which i have a feeling might be my last.


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## FreeSoul

Zero...
although there was one, sort of... but I don't think of that one as a true relationship...
So yeah, zero.


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## scairy

Lonelyguy said:


> I'm just a few weeks away from turning 31 and I've never been on a date or done anything intimate with a woman. I only know of a few people here who can match or top my record.


Don't worry I'm going to shatter your record. I have 9 more years until I do so and by then you probably will have left this board. But to make things fair I need to at least start asking ladies out so I can say I was shut down 1,000 times which would be a new record on its own that will probably never be broken lol. Can't really start this asking thing yet though because a light bulb turned on and I realized I'm broke. So I'm going to post a question on this for feedback.


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## Inturmal

counting both hands, I've actually had 3. 

yes, it's a lame joke, but at least it triples my count. :b


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## ShyLight

zero :um


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## LoneStar

One. I just was recently in a long distance relationship with someone but had to break it off because of the distance. It was really sad to have to since I do care for her but life unfortunately get in the way sometimes.


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## fallenstar

hmmm ..... as far as serious relationships go ... i have had 5.


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## Dead Squirrel

Well, technically I've had one... but it feels like zero. It only lasted for 5 weeks, 4 of which she was out of the country and we had no contact. So in total we were together for about 9 days, and we only dated once. Otherwise it was mostly an online thing. =/


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## Ross

I'm 30. I've had one relationship which was online, it lasted for 2 months.


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## UltraShy

Zero


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## LoneWolf667

Zero


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## BornLoser

I dated 9 chicks but only slept with 3 of them...with 3 others I couldn't perform(worst thing that ever happened 2 me)..and with the other 3 the relation never reached a sexual level cuz none of my "relationships" lasted longer than 3 weeks to a month so I experienced all that stuff between 14 and 18 years old...i'm now 22 years old and since the age of 18 i havnt dated anyone i havnt even had the opportunity to sleep with a girl, the only thing i did in the past 4 years is make out with this girl like a month ago..I'm a total loser.


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## Carbon Breather

BornLoser said:


> .I'm a total loser.


Seriously. WTF do you mean. You've dated 9 girls and many guys here are over 30 and have dated 0. Are you trolling this forum??


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## No-Sturm-und-Drang

0 forever lol


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## Thomas Paine

newfoundglory said:


> 0.... 1.... 2.... 3.... more? :um


More, and no you should not be jealous of that. For each one you lose a little piece of your soul.


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## andy1984

3 I guess... but only one that was really real. Of the other two, one was completely online, and the other was mostly online - neither of those lasted long.


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## lastofthekews

None


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## caflme

define relationship... please. 

Meaningless sex doesn't qualify to me.

Friendships don't qualify.

If we are talking committed dating relationships with intimacy where both people have mutual feelings for each other? 3 --- my first husband and my second although with both of these we didn't really 'date' we met, spent a lot of time together and he moved in with me and we eventually got married. 

My last relationship was the first time I ever got to date, develop real feelings before being sexual (lol, who am I kidding, I never got to be sexual with him)... but it was committed and we dated (at first anyway), very little to no intimacy on his part so maybe that is a no, and mutual... maybe not... maybe it was just me. So maybe I really have to answer 2 to that question.


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## DeeperUnderstanding

Zero. And it'll probably stay that way for a while.


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## EagerMinnow84

0. Zero. Nil. None. Zip. Nada. Zilch. 

I don't even know HOW one gets into a relationship. I don't understand what attracts someone to someone else and the chances of both people being attracted to each other to then want to date each other long enough to begin a relationship with them. Well, I guess I know what attracts me to guys but I don't think anything about me is attractive and if there is, they would get bored with me so quickly. 

I guess a lot of it has to do with luck, which I have none of.


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## JFmtl

none that really counts...


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## JustWakeUp

Zero, Zip, Nada, Zilch


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## Traci

1 dating sort of thing and 1 relationship


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## nothing to fear

0.5 (?)


edit: my post count is 4114. cool!


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## XxArmyofOnexX

Zeeeeeeerrrrroooooooo


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## mind_games

Hmm lets see <starts counting on his left hand, folding fingers as he counts.. 1, 2, 3, 4 ..> Oh wait, NONE!


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## rumjungle

I've a sort of one that I dated and spoke to alot that didn't work out. A few other false starts too. Nothing serious. To put it simply...none.


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## AussiePea

I had one recently which was going strongly, but my SA killed it in its tracks as soon as it became really official. So 1.


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## strawberryjulius

Two. One was for two months and the other is almost 6 months now.


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## lastofthekews

EagerMinnow84 said:


> 0. Zero. Nil. None. Zip. Nada. Zilch.
> 
> I don't even know HOW one gets into a relationship. I don't understand what attracts someone to someone else and the chances of both people being attracted to each other to then want to date each other long enough to begin a relationship with them. Well, I guess I know what attracts me to guys but I don't think anything about me is attractive and if there is, they would get bored with me so quickly.
> 
> I guess a lot of it has to do with luck, which I have none of.


:ditto (except i'm attracted to women, not guys  )


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## Xtina_Xposed

Just 1.. I don't want anyone else after this.. Too depressing


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## ShyViolet

ZERO :cry


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## banjerbanjo

Six I guess. Three of them don't really count though. Two of the three that don't count were just junior high foolishness, and the third one that doesn't count was more of just regularly messing around with a friend.


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## Equisgurl

it depends what constitutes a relationship. I guess 2.. one was a year, another 7 months, I also dated a guy for 3 weeks.. that was short lived.. eh..


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## AliBaba

nothing to fear said:


> 0.5 (?)
> 
> edit: my post count is 4114. cool!


:lol What does this mean??! There's actually a really appropriate quote from the Pineapple Express that I was about 5 seconds away from replying with until I realized it may result in my banishment. Be expecting a PM.


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## nothing to fear

AliBaba said:


> :lol What does this mean??! There's actually a really appropriate quote from the Pineapple Express that I was about 5 seconds away from replying with until I realized it may result in my banishment. Be expecting a PM.


 i say 0.5 because i'm not sure if it qualified as a relationship


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## anomalous

nothing to fear said:


> i say 0.5 because i'm not sure if it qualified as a relationship


I have the same answer for the same reason, actually.


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## EgoZero

Zero


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## EagerMinnow84

I don't know if anyone else does this, and it is kind of embarrassing to say but sometimes, since I never had the opportunity to do this, I would change my relationship status on here (or when I had a myspace) to "in a relationship" just to see what it looks like. Ugh. 

I am a loser.


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## mooncake

Just one, which is the one I'm in now (coming up to 10 months). I count it as a stroke of luck that he came into my life and actually showed an interest in me, because if he hadn't done so I don't doubt for a second that I'd still be single and would be staying that way for a long, long time to come.


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## Saqq

Zero =/ 

I've asked 2 girls out though to complete failure at least :b


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## KumagoroBeam

Zero


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## odd_one_out

3 long-term ones and a few shorter-term ones. They did not involve being in love.


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## miminka

0. Probably 45 if you count Club Penguin relationships.... (which I do... [loser])


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## xboxfreak

None.


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## DSPFrat

I've made out and messed around with a few girls, but never had a relationship.


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## Envision

BeNice said:


> Two... almost three. Really, almost one. I can't really say. They were all girls I met on the internet and only had brief moments with. When I think relationship I think something that is lasting and you spend every night together for months in a row, not a couple of days.


Maybe a month of frequent dating.


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## mardy423

1, I was misreable in it, but I wasnt lonely, i really miss her.


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## aphrodite

I am on my 6th, hopefully my last.


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## gaz

Two if my hands count.


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## Moon Fire

I'm presently in a relationship. I don't remember how many I've had. Perhaps it was more than one, I can't recall. I find my memory going cloudy about past relationships and friends, names of people, ect.


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## Efsee

gaz said:


> Two if my hands count.


:doh:lol
I had one when I was 16ish, but we were realy young and immature, I don't know if it even counts.


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## Dempsey

None. Never come close.


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## milo001

0.i'm 21 now.


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## leomouse

5 if i'm counting the relationships where the feelings were strong on both sides and it lasted for a while, plus a few casual ones that never went anywhere.


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## dawntoearth

gaz said:


> Two if my hands count.


Ambidextrous, huh.

4.


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## shadowmask

Two, but neither of them amounted to anything. I'm grateful for the experience, however.


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## gaz

dawntoearth said:


> Ambidextrous, huh.
> 
> 4.


I just enjoy threesomes!


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## Dipper

I've been in about 13-14 relationships.

j/k, zero.


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## Zephyr

Zero. Sometimes even that feels like too many.


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## markx

Two, if you count being in love aged about 8 (and then being stood up on the first and only "date") and an unlikely online friendship which gradually evolved into something much deeper, only for the relationship to be extinguished by terminal cancer before I got the chance to wrap my arms around her in the real world.


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## panda

0, never even been close


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## Inscrutable Banana

I haven't had any relationships outside of a boys idea of a one when I was 10 or so. Basically just two kids who were fond of each other and shared a peck on the cheek occasionally.

There was another instance where I had a big crush on the daughter of one of my moms friends. Didn't work up the courage to tell her I liked her until the day that I had to leave (I was staying with her family while my mother went on a trip), so I don't know if she shared my feelings. Granted, that's all boyhood crushes and not really important in the grand scheme of things. My teen and adult life has had zero meaningful interaction with the opposite sex.


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## Witan

One LDR with a girl from my high school while I was abroad.


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## KennethJones

0


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## sprout

3. My last relationship was 10 years ago (!), though. Excuse me while I go cry in the corner...


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## rcapo89

I've never been in a relationship or kissed a girl and I'm 20 years old. :sigh


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## rb1088

1 and it ended badly. I am being very catious now.


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## Toad Licker

6 or more, I had several in highschool they didn't last longer than a few months though.


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## 2Talkative

4 or so all pre-adulthood. I've had chances since and just totally blown it. I stil haven't given up that one day i'll find someone but i'm 27 now and only getting older rather quickly it seems.


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## Witan

2Talkative said:


> i'm 27 now and only getting older rather quickly it seems.


Oh jeez, I can relate. It seems like since I got to college the years have just zoomed by. I'll remember some big event that was in the news and think, "how long ago did that happen? A few months?". Then I'll look it up and see that it happened several YEARS ago!


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## N3XT2NON3

6, the first lasted a year and a half only cuz she was controlling & i just went along with it cuz i was afraid to say otherwise...


i dont know i even got 1 sometimes. i'm currently looking though..


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## VIncymon

0.5.

A one night date for the high school ball doesn't count. The girl left the state, the next day.


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## DuncanThaw

Two.

Both long-term, neither regretted: one current, hopefully to continue for a lifetime.


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## S.T.A.T.

2.

That's 2 too many. lol.


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## DuncanThaw

markx said:


> ...an unlikely online friendship which gradually evolved into something much deeper, only for the relationship to be extinguished by terminal cancer before I got the chance to wrap my arms around her in the real world.


This is so very sad, what a profoundly painful loss, markx. All my very warmest thoughts and wishes are with you. :hug

I'm not exactly sure how to say this without hurting or bumbling awfully, but I'm so very glad that you were able to connect with someone -- even though you lost her, prematurely, in this painful way. Deeply/thoughtfully-felt long-distance/online relationships are no less intense/nurturing than if the person were with you every moment of the day, and I don't believe the loss any less acute. I hope you've had the chance to say good-bye, in your own way, but still live every day with your happy memories of her.


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## rockst4r

two. First was the worst, second was the best


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## kenny87

zero


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## IcedOver

I've had zip; at 33 I've never even been on a date.


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## Tangent

0


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## markx

DuncanThaw said:


> This is so very sad, what a profoundly painful loss, markx. All my very warmest thoughts and wishes are with you. :hug
> 
> I'm not exactly sure how to say this without hurting or bumbling awfully, but I'm so very glad that you were able to connect with someone -- even though you lost her, prematurely, in this painful way. Deeply/thoughtfully-felt long-distance/online relationships are no less intense/nurturing than if the person were with you every moment of the day, and I don't believe the loss any less acute. I hope you've had the chance to say good-bye, in your own way, but still live every day with your happy memories of her.


Aww, thank you for that.  Yes, I still think about Sarah every day, I still blame myself for not being able to help her more when she needed it the most and I'm still deeply ashamed that I couldn't overcome the SA so that I could go to see her. I was gradually getting there but... too little, too late. She really understood me like no one has ever done before or since and she knew I was struggling with SA, even though I hadn't been able to put a label on it at that point. If fate hadn't intervened, I think we'd have been together now. She was an amazing person and a great friend and I wish that everyone could experience that sort of love and acceptance at least once in their lifetime. I'll never forget her and one day I *will* wrap my arms around her.

Sheesh, my screen has gone all blurry again...


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## dax

Like 4 or 5. Some didn't last so long.


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## KennethJones

IcedOver said:


> I've had zip; at 33 I've never even been on a date.


`Damn, that is sad. Sorry about that buddy


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## DuncanThaw

markx said:


> Aww, thank you for that.  Yes, I still think about Sarah every day, I still blame myself for not being able to help her more when she needed it the most and I'm still deeply ashamed that I couldn't overcome the SA so that I could go to see her. I was gradually getting there but... too little, too late. She really understood me like no one has ever done before or since and she knew I was struggling with SA, even though I hadn't been able to put a label on it at that point. If fate hadn't intervened, I think we'd have been together now. She was an amazing person and a great friend and I wish that everyone could experience that sort of love and acceptance at least once in their lifetime. I'll never forget her and one day I *will* wrap my arms around her.
> 
> Sheesh, my screen has gone all blurry again...


It really is something so wonderful to share that spiritual closeness with someone, and I'm sure that you will be able to wrap your arms around her. That's such a lovely way of putting it.  That sort of love, understanding and acceptance, indeed, so beautiful...I'm so happy for you to have experienced it!

Meh, that blasted screen!


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## gaz

I'm going to buy a doll, like this guy.


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## KyleThomas

markx said:


> Aww, thank you for that.  Yes, I still think about Sarah every day, I still blame myself for not being able to help her more when she needed it the most and I'm still deeply ashamed that I couldn't overcome the SA so that I could go to see her. I was gradually getting there but... too little, too late. She really understood me like no one has ever done before or since and she knew I was struggling with SA, even though I hadn't been able to put a label on it at that point. If fate hadn't intervened, I think we'd have been together now. She was an amazing person and a great friend and I wish that everyone could experience that sort of love and acceptance at least once in their lifetime. I'll never forget her and one day I *will* wrap my arms around her.
> 
> Sheesh, my screen has gone all blurry again...


That's a very moving story, Mark. How cruel that yours and Sarah's happiness should be snatched away like that. You really shouldn't blame yourself, or feel ashamed. SA is a hard thing to overcome. If it wasn't, then this forum wouldn't exist in the first place. It's good that your experience doesn't seem to have made you angry or bitter. In your situation, I don't know that I wouldn't end up feeling that way.


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## slyfox

I'm 23 and my answer is zero


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## dreamer222

:cry

I think that should answer the question nicely, lol.


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## markx

DuncanThaw said:


> It really is something so wonderful to share that spiritual closeness with someone, and I'm sure that you will be able to wrap your arms around her. That's such a lovely way of putting it.  That sort of love, understanding and acceptance, indeed, so beautiful...I'm so happy for you to have experienced it!


Yes, it was amazing and something I never thought I'd experience. 



KyleThomas said:


> That's a very moving story, Mark. How cruel that yours and Sarah's happiness should be snatched away like that. You really shouldn't blame yourself, or feel ashamed. SA is a hard thing to overcome. If it wasn't, then this forum wouldn't exist in the first place. It's good that your experience doesn't seem to have made you angry or bitter. In your situation, I don't know that I wouldn't end up feeling that way.


I know that I shouldn't really blame myself and in truth it wasn't _all_ my fault (being a little stubborn was one of the things that we had in common) but if we hadn't been separated by 4000 miles and my SA, _maybe_ I could have saved her. That's a hard thing to come to terms with. Feeling bitter wouldn't be a good way to remember her though. I feel thankful that our paths crossed and that we got the chance to spend many happy times "together".

That relationship proved to me that although it might seem like love has passed you by completely, it can appear in the most unlikely places. *I* might never get another chance, but there's always reason to hope.


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## huh

gaz said:


> I'm going to buy a doll, like this guy.


Awww...poor guy :lol


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## kenny87

> I'm going to buy a doll, like this guy.


haha, I thought about doing the same thing, I don't think I could be obsessed with it though like that guy, I am not that crazy.....yet.


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## Aurora

Depends on what you call a relationship? But I would say only 2 serious relationships. 1st lasted 2.5 years, not a nice relationship, drugs and psychosis played a part in the ending of that one. Now this time Ive been with my man for 5.


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## steelmyhead

gaz said:


> I'm going to buy a doll, like this guy.


I couldn't watch it with sound, and I skipped around a lot, but at the end when he kisses it and the eyes were all zombie... that was really heartbreaking. No matter how bad it gets for me, I hope I never go that route.


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## anonymid

Wow, this is an old thread. My original answer from three years ago is on the first page.

Anyway, I've been in two or three relationships, depending on whether you count on online/phone one from last year that ended before we ever met in person.


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## heyJude

1. 

That was an online thing though. I'm not so sure I would call it a "relationship". He was a loser.


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## EagerMinnow84

IcedOver said:


> I've had zip; at 33 I've never even been on a date.


If it wasn't for the internet I would have never been on a date.


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## dirty rich

zero

i am decent looking but too socially inept to get into a relationship


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## MidnightBlu

4. 4th one is my current lovely boyfriend that I am still with and am deeply in love with.


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## nightrain

I've had one I guess. She really hurt me :rain


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## nothing to fear

i guess 1, sort of. it was lame. my fault obviously.


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## millenniumman75

If I answered before...I am STILL waiting.


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## mserychic

2, but one was long distance. so yea.


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## IDK

1 about 5 years ago now...


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## MrWorry

Had one long term 3yrs. Included a little girl that kept seeing after we broke up for another 3yrs. I've thought about her pretty much everyday for the last 10 yrs. Can't believe she is probably graduating high school now. Makes me sad everytime i think about her. She was such a big part of my life even though she was not biologically mine.

She use to call me her daddy and i'd call her my daughter:|


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## sharks88

I've been out on 1 date, and then had the girl not show up at the next date. She swore she would make it up, and go out with me again. Stupid me knew she was playing me, and yet I kept chasing. Also walked around the mall with a girl. Haven't asked a girl out since. That was back in Spring of 2007. So 0


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## marenubium87

Two, and a really random night of alcohol and somewhat impulsive decision-making. I'm still trying to get over the second one though.


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## EagerMinnow84

Still zero. Still not counting my 2 long distance ones since they never considered me their girlfriend. So, yeah... zero. And it is going to be zero for a very very _very_ long time to come. I don't think I am capable of being in a relationship let alone attracting someone. I have been in a couple of dating sites for the majority of 2 years and I have been on 3 dates, one being last year. How anyone gets into a relationship is utterly foreign to me. I don't know why anyone would even want me as their girlfriend.

(sorry, I have had a really bad day today.)


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## Squirrelevant

0


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## Emptyheart

whiteclouds said:


> A big fat ZERO.


Well just got outta one :/
I've been in 2


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## Emerald3

None because I'm too scared! And no-one has ever liked me, it's usually my friend who gets all the guys...


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## DeeperUnderstanding

I think I would be shocked if any girl actually showed interest in me.


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## MidnightBlu

Emerald3 said:


> None because I'm too scared! And no-one has ever liked me, it's usually my friend who gets all the guys...


Aw.  Ask your friend to hook you up with someone.


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## EagerMinnow84

Emerald3 said:


> None because I'm too scared! And no-one has ever liked me, it's usually my friend who gets all the guys...


That really hurts. I know this all to well. Ugh.


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## outcast69

EagerMinnow84 said:


> Still zero. Still not counting my 2 long distance ones since they never considered me their girlfriend. So, yeah... zero. And it is going to be zero for a very very _very_ long time to come. I don't think I am capable of being in a relationship let alone attracting someone. I have been in a couple of dating sites for the majority of 2 years and I have been on 3 dates, one being last year. How anyone gets into a relationship is utterly foreign to me. I don't know why anyone would even want me as their girlfriend.
> 
> (sorry, I have had a really bad day today.)


Sorry,to hear how your feeling.I know from talking to you,that you have alot to offer some very lucky guy out there.Please,don't give up on love.That's something I am trying to teach myself right now.:rub


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## locsaf

,


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## asdf

0


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## zomgz

two.

the first one I thought was perfect... but she died =( =( i was very very torn up inside for a long time..

and now i'm in love again and hope it lasts forever =D


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## Zirnitra

I...I don't understand the question.


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## addictedtochaos

0


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## EagerMinnow84

zomgz said:


> the first one I thought was perfect... but she died =( =( i was very very torn up inside for a long time..


How sad.


----------



## InThe519

4 long term relationships

One that lasted 3 years, 2 years, and two 1 year relationships

Been single now for 2 years


----------



## Crunchie

1. and it's so hard for me to get into... just can't


----------



## leonardess

far too many.


----------



## Jurexic5

one, and things just fell apart for me after we broke up. it's weird because i don't miss her much, but i know i lost someone sort of special.


----------



## epril

I'd say 5. One for 20 years now.


----------



## Havalina

Hmm my definition of a relationship would be at least a year in length and exlusive....so I'm on my sixth. I'm 23.


----------



## scintilla

Every time I see this thread I start to feel really depressed lol


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## Witan

whatsername75 said:


> Every time I see this thread I start to feel really depressed lol




Well, for what it's worth, if it weren't for SA (and the fact that you live far away in a different country, haha) I would definitely ask you on a date and see how things go. You seem really cool, and I honestly don't understand why you're unwillingly single :con


----------



## sanspants08

Witan said:


> Well, for what it's worth, if it weren't for SA (and the fact that you live far away in a different country, haha) I would definitely ask you on a date and see how things go. You seem really cool, and I honestly don't understand why you're unwillingly single :con


Don't let a border crossing stand in your way man. I'm not going to 

Relationships...are hard to define, but as far as stuff that lasted more than a few weeks...12. I'm also 31, so it's not like I'm just starting out...


----------



## estse

epril said:


> I'd say 5. One for 20 years now.


Shucks.


----------



## Witan

whatsername75 said:


> Awe, thanks :blush. I guess it`s a shame we live so far away from each other then...as I would gladly go on a date with a guy as nice as you


Yeah, that's the dilemma of the internet. It makes it easier to meet and get to know other people who are like you..........and who you'll probably never see in real life :b C'est la vie.


----------



## Fenren

Erm I've had one technically like someone else said in this thread also, but only for 10 days:|so I don't really count that. Didn't do much except talk and kiss. Haven't had even a peck on the cheek for 7 years or so and I've give up really now. 
Who would have me anyway when there are much better prospects to be with instead.


----------



## millenniumman75

I came close to being in a relationship probably twice.
The second was when I was in college. This girl and I got along really well and people thought we would make a good couple, but she went off, at 19 (I was 21), and dated a 23-year-old divorced guy with three kids (ages 5,3,and 1 at the time!). I was going to ask her out on Valentine's Day 1997, after she broke up with him, but she went back to him after he gave her a bracelet. I was crushed. We saw each other right before I graduated in 1999. It was one of those "what would have happened" deals.


----------



## ecotec83

Dated 3 people for a couple of weeks when i was 18-19. Was in a serious relationship for about 5 years. Finally just starting to get over the break-up after over a year. I no longer want him back but i do miss having someone special to share life with.


----------



## eekmd

I've had 7 that could be considered "relationships" (Though how serious those relationships were varies greatly), If you'd count the number of people I've been on dates with, that number would probably be around 11.


----------



## Perfectionist

One whole entire sortof one.


----------



## Spettro

0000000

don't think i've ever even had a proper conversation with a girl hehe


----------



## alm583

2


----------



## tlgibson97

I have been in 1. Met my current wife when I was 15 and have been with her ever since. She was the first girl to show interest in me in 15 years so I figured at that rate I had better marry her. I didn't want to meet my second when I was 30.


----------



## David1976

I guess I would have to say 3... but it has been 8 years since my last one..


----------



## Witan

tlgibson97 said:


> I have been in 1. Met my current wife when I was 15 and have been with her ever since. She was the first girl to show interest in me in 15 years so I figured at that rate I had better marry her. I didn't want to meet my second when I was 30.


In one sense I think you're really lucky, but in another I think you're not. My one LDR ended really badly, but it did make me realize the truth to the saying "don't marry the first person you date". The thought of being married to my ex makes my skin crawl, but I would have done it because I didn't know a relationship could be any other way. But if you're happy, then that's good and I'm happy for you. I think lots of people can only dream of finding their "one and only" on the first try, at such a young age.


----------



## tlgibson97

Witan, I'm sure that you would agree that every situation is different. LDR's are very difficult to live through and it takes a special, trusting, relationship to make it work. The year after I met my wife, she moved away to college. Fortunately, it was only a couple hundred miles away so every other weekend or so I would make the drive and go visit or bring her back home. I can't predict how it would have turned out if I couldnt visit all year. This was back in '95-'96 when we were just getting familiar with email. I remember back then I couldnt tell an email address from a URL.

We got married a month after I graduated high school then moved away together so I could go to college. We had a baby. I worked full time while going to class in the evening for 2 years. When I graduated that school, we moved again so I could go to a 4-year college. I took the first year off of work to focus on school. We had a second baby in 2000 and I had to go back to work again while going to college full time. We did what we had to to make ends meet but we made it through. 

Those were very difficult years. We had plenty of fights, mainly over money, or lack of it. We even went bankrupt 6mos after I graduated college. Her work slowed and I couldnt find work so the ends just didnt meet any more.

I am guilty off looking back and wondering what could have been. No matter what outcome or changes I think of isn't worth giving up what I have now. I guess I regret not having the experiences of having more relationships. I have never loved and lost. I loved and kept.

I have a loving wife, 2 loving children (who will both be in college before I turn 40), and as a family we have already been through the most difficult part of life together and we made it. Life is easy now. We both have good jobs. The bills are paid every month and we dont have to worry about where we will get the money to pay those bills. That relieves a lot of stress from a relationship. 

I do think I was very lucky to find her. It is a bit of a shame I had to find her the first time out but it just turned out that way. I was also lucky that she was able to follow me around while I accomplished my dreams. She wanted a family more than anything and I just wanted to be successful enough to provide for my family. We both go what we wanted and now we can just sit back and enjoy it. 

I would feel sorry for someone if they broke up with what could be the love of their life just because they want to try new things. The thing is you make choices and you live with them. If I would have never dated her, I could have met a girl that made my life 1000 times better or I could have met a girl that totally destroyed my life, or I could still be alone. I will never know and all the rewards in the world wouldnt make me give up what I have now. What I have is great.

My life is by no means perfect and it isnt without problems ( I am here, right). I am lucky to have found a woman who will put up with me. I am sure she feels lucky to have found someone who will put up with her  I know what I have is rare nowadays and with more luck we can continue to make it last.


----------



## superhappyfunchica

I've had... 5 relationships. The longest lasting 2 1/2 years, the current one at 6 months, and the weirdest one being someone I was in love with but never met lol.


----------



## MidnightBlu

tlgibson97 said:


> I have been in 1. Met my current wife when I was 15 and have been with her ever since. She was the first girl to show interest in me in 15 years so I figured at that rate I had better marry her. I didn't want to meet my second when I was 30.


Lucky. I kinda wish I had a long term relationship like that. How did you maintain the long term relationship? I don't know how. All my past ones lasted for less than a month (except one of my past ones and my current one). I hope me and my boyfriend last to marriage.


----------



## tlgibson97

thegoodtimes said:


> How did you maintain the long term relationship?


Hehe, what seems like a simple question....

I have evaluated my relationship a lot and I think I have pinpointed a few things that have made it lasting that I will share. Since it seems harder and harder for people to stay together now. You already know how difficult it is. One thing you can do is evaluate your prior relationships and honestly determine the factors that caused it to fail.

One thing that helped me is that I started out the relationship treating it like a marriage. That strong of a commitment freaks most people out but thats the commitmment you have to have from the beginning. You can't go into it looking for something better to come along.

Realize that nobody is perfect. Everyone has their flaws and things about them you won't like so well. You have to determine what flaws you can deal with and those you can't. I definitely have my flaws, my wife has hers. But, the things I like about her far outweigh what I dislike.

Don't go into the relationship expecting to change how someone is. Over time you can get someone to change how they are to an extent and over time some people change on their own. Sometimes they change the wrong way and pick up behaviors you can't live with. I'm sure you know where that leads.

I would have to say communication is the #1 thing the relationship needs. I can't emphasize that enough. You absolutely have to be honest and be able to express how you feel without being judgemental to the other person. Secrets are bad unless it is for a surprise party  Arguments, disagreements, and screaming fights will happen. You each must be respectful of each other during these arguments. If you start calling names you have already lost the argument. Name calling comes when you have nothing better to say and you know you are losing. Usually when it comes to screaming the argument is lost too. Even though sometimes it doesnt seem like the other person is hearing you unless you are screaming. It is perfectly fine to disagree about something. It is ok no never agree on it ever. Keep the argument on the issue and don't make personal attacks.

Know that a bunch of little things can add up to be big things. Pick the fights you know you can win. Don't argue for the sake of arguing. That gets old quick and really wears on a person.

If you are wrong, admit it. Theres nothing wrong with being wrong. You could be misinformed or misunderstand something. I'm wrong on occasion. I admit when I am and I give her credit for being right. Sometimes she has an idea that seems outright stupid to me, but ends up being the only solution. It boggles me how in my infinite wisdom I couldn't figure it out and she did

Forgive, forgive, forgive. Holding a grudge will get you nowhere. Iv'e tried to hold a grudge before and I just can't do it, against her anyways.

Be respectful of each others feelings an thoughts.

Unfortunatley, trust has to be earned. Even though I inherantly trust everyone until they give me a reason not to it is hard to 100% trust someone. Even after 15 years I dint think I can 100% trust my wife. I can't 100% trust myself. The difference between right and wrong can sometimes get fuzzy. Thats why forgive, forgive, forgive is so important. There have been times I have done something wrong without even knowing it. Sometimes you can't tell what will hurt the others feelings.

Don't be selfish, be selfless. But still be your own person. This is a balance between what you dedicate to your partner and what you dedicate to yourself. Everything can't always be about you and it can't always be about them. I have trouble being my own person but luckily she puts up with it. She knows how I am.

You will fight over money. Whether you have none or you have a lot there will be arguments over it. One of you is a saver, the other a spender - One will argue that you arent meeting your savings goals and the other is angry that they cant go shopping. If both are spenders you will probably be broke all the timeand you will argue that you have no money to pay the bills. If you are both savers I don't know what you might fight over but I'm sure you would find something. When we first started out we were broke and couldnt buy anything. Then we were broke but used credit. Then we went bankrupt. Now we have a little extra money and it is better. Less arguments but the most common is one of us bought something and now we dont have the money for the other to buy something. She tends to nickel and dime the money away on a bunch of little things (going out to eat) where I am frugal most the time but then splurges on big items like boats, motorcycles, electronics, etc. Either way we end up in the same place.

You have probably noticed the pattern of arguments by now. There's no way around them, they happen, live with them, get over them, let them go, move on to the next thing. Don't dwell on it. Sometimes I push her buttons just because I know it will get her fired up  Just don't push my buttons.... I can dish it out but I can't take it

When life gives you a challenge, work together to figure it out. It won't work if you are always right and he is always wrong.

And now the key to the whole long term relationship....
You have to find someone who is willing to do everything I just listed along side you. I got lucky and I think it takes a bit of luck. Everyone is different, they were raised different under different circumstances. Thats why you have to evaluate your prior relationships to determine what were the main causes of the failure and see what you can change about yourself and what were things that you had no control over.

P.S. Its up to you to determine the importance of sex in the relationship. The desires will change over time but I'm fairly certain that if one of you arent willing to be monogomous the relationship probably wont last.

P.S.S. All this is just my opinion based on my experiences and my observation of failed relationships. Since I am still married to my first girlfriend it is impossible for me to know much more than that.


----------



## tlgibson97

Sorry guys, I didn't mean for it to be that long.


----------



## Post_Punk_Proclivity

I've been in 2 but have dated a bit more.


----------



## Post_Punk_Proclivity

tlgibson97 said:


> Hehe, what seems like a simple question....
> 
> I have evaluated my relationship a lot and I think I have pinpointed a few things that have made it lasting that I will share. Since it seems harder and harder for people to stay together now. You already know how difficult it is. One thing you can do is evaluate your prior relationships and honestly determine the factors that caused it to fail.
> 
> One thing that helped me is that I started out the relationship treating it like a marriage. That strong of a commitment freaks most people out but thats the commitmment you have to have from the beginning. You can't go into it looking for something better to come along.
> 
> Realize that nobody is perfect. Everyone has their flaws and things about them you won't like so well. You have to determine what flaws you can deal with and those you can't. I definitely have my flaws, my wife has hers. But, the things I like about her far outweigh what I dislike.
> 
> Don't go into the relationship expecting to change how someone is. Over time you can get someone to change how they are to an extent and over time some people change on their own. Sometimes they change the wrong way and pick up behaviors you can't live with. I'm sure you know where that leads.
> 
> I would have to say communication is the #1 thing the relationship needs. I can't emphasize that enough. You absolutely have to be honest and be able to express how you feel without being judgemental to the other person. Secrets are bad unless it is for a surprise party  Arguments, disagreements, and screaming fights will happen. You each must be respectful of each other during these arguments. If you start calling names you have already lost the argument. Name calling comes when you have nothing better to say and you know you are losing. Usually when it comes to screaming the argument is lost too. Even though sometimes it doesnt seem like the other person is hearing you unless you are screaming. It is perfectly fine to disagree about something. It is ok no never agree on it ever. Keep the argument on the issue and don't make personal attacks.
> 
> Know that a bunch of little things can add up to be big things. Pick the fights you know you can win. Don't argue for the sake of arguing. That gets old quick and really wears on a person.
> 
> If you are wrong, admit it. Theres nothing wrong with being wrong. You could be misinformed or misunderstand something. I'm wrong on occasion. I admit when I am and I give her credit for being right. Sometimes she has an idea that seems outright stupid to me, but ends up being the only solution. It boggles me how in my infinite wisdom I couldn't figure it out and she did
> 
> Forgive, forgive, forgive. Holding a grudge will get you nowhere. Iv'e tried to hold a grudge before and I just can't do it, against her anyways.
> 
> Be respectful of each others feelings an thoughts.
> 
> Unfortunatley, trust has to be earned. Even though I inherantly trust everyone until they give me a reason not to it is hard to 100% trust someone. Even after 15 years I dint think I can 100% trust my wife. I can't 100% trust myself. The difference between right and wrong can sometimes get fuzzy. Thats why forgive, forgive, forgive is so important. There have been times I have done something wrong without even knowing it. Sometimes you can't tell what will hurt the others feelings.
> 
> Don't be selfish, be selfless. But still be your own person. This is a balance between what you dedicate to your partner and what you dedicate to yourself. Everything can't always be about you and it can't always be about them. I have trouble being my own person but luckily she puts up with it. She knows how I am.
> 
> You will fight over money. Whether you have none or you have a lot there will be arguments over it. One of you is a saver, the other a spender - One will argue that you arent meeting your savings goals and the other is angry that they cant go shopping. If both are spenders you will probably be broke all the timeand you will argue that you have no money to pay the bills. If you are both savers I don't know what you might fight over but I'm sure you would find something. When we first started out we were broke and couldnt buy anything. Then we were broke but used credit. Then we went bankrupt. Now we have a little extra money and it is better. Less arguments but the most common is one of us bought something and now we dont have the money for the other to buy something. She tends to nickel and dime the money away on a bunch of little things (going out to eat) where I am frugal most the time but then splurges on big items like boats, motorcycles, electronics, etc. Either way we end up in the same place.
> 
> You have probably noticed the pattern of arguments by now. There's no way around them, they happen, live with them, get over them, let them go, move on to the next thing. Don't dwell on it. Sometimes I push her buttons just because I know it will get her fired up  Just don't push my buttons.... I can dish it out but I can't take it
> 
> When life gives you a challenge, work together to figure it out. It won't work if you are always right and he is always wrong.
> 
> And now the key to the whole long term relationship....
> You have to find someone who is willing to do everything I just listed along side you. I got lucky and I think it takes a bit of luck. Everyone is different, they were raised different under different circumstances. Thats why you have to evaluate your prior relationships to determine what were the main causes of the failure and see what you can change about yourself and what were things that you had no control over.
> 
> P.S. Its up to you to determine the importance of sex in the relationship. The desires will change over time but I'm fairly certain that if one of you arent willing to be monogomous the relationship probably wont last.
> 
> P.S.S. All this is just my opinion based on my experiences and my observation of failed relationships. Since I am still married to my first girlfriend it is impossible for me to know much more than that.


They sure do seem like a heck of a lot of effort, but you speak the truth.


----------



## tlgibson97

Jaiyyson said:


> They sure do seem like a heck of a lot of effort, but you speak the truth.


It seems like a lot but I never really think about what all has to be done, it sort of comes naturally I guess like maybe I was just born to be in a LTR. Its funny though since my parents divorced when I was 2 and my mom is on her 5th marriage.

Ultimately, the whole relationship durability comes down to one thing.

Respect

When you respect the other person in every way and they respect you. You have to put yourself in their shoes and see things from their point of view and be willing to bend on things.

If I could, I would have my wife stay home all the time and be a hobbit with me. But I want her to be happy and I know that going out and doing things with her friends or having them over is what she enjoys. Even though it causes me anxiety, it is worth haivng some discomfort so she can be happy. There's no reason why my discomfort should cause her discomfort. Sometimes I don't go with her to her friends because I'm just not feeling it that day. I feel bad then because I am alone but I can usually find something to keep myself busy and its a lot more comfortable than entertaining her friends.


----------



## Saqq

0 - although maybe in 2010, based on how 2009 is going (did complete 180 in my life) -- any volunteers ladies?


----------



## gaz

whatsername75 said:


> Every time I see this thread I start to feel really depressed lol


:ditto


----------



## duskyy

One.


----------



## etka

deuce


----------



## 00Athena00

I have had 2. One guy was controlling and emotionally abusive, the other treated me more like a surrogate mother than a girlfriend. 

So all of you who have never been in a relationship, don't feel too bad. It's better to wait for the right person than to settle for the wrong one.


----------



## Peter Attis

6.022 x 10^-23


----------



## Futures

0.

Never even come close.


----------



## cmed

2


----------



## Lovesick Loner

1 serious relationship

2 semi-intimate flings

4 awkward friend's-zone disasters


----------



## matty

During high school I had 2 serious, post high school again 2 serious. 

During high school I lost count of girlfriends, just one or two week stuff. 

Post high school just the 2 serious. No flings, no hook ups, not even a kiss out side of my 2 mentioned. 
I am now happily single. Not interested in flings, one night stands or hook ups. Happiest I have been in years.


----------



## FakeFur

0


----------



## delirium

3.141592653589

If you get that joke, you're probably as lonely as me  (Joke inspired by Peter Attis's Avogadro's constant; thanks Peter!)

But seriously... I've had one beautiful disaster of a relationship, and two brief relationships with girls who made me never want to date girls again. But, nature as it is...


----------



## ssmcivicsi

6-8 months: 2
3-6 months: 2
<=1 month: 3
Single dates: 6


----------

