# Do you have any secrets that you would never tell a partner?



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Something that they might like to know but you could never tell them. If so, do you think it is something a partner would break up with you if they ever found out?


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## MARYC (Sep 27, 2011)

My whole personality is a secret for the rest of the world (even for my sister who happens to be my best friend and the person i trust the most).

I don't feel like i have to share things that are too personal with anyone, they are mine,they belong to my mind and i can choose what to share and what not, nobody apart from me has any rights over my thought, memories and secrets.

with that being said.... i've never had a partner


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## Elad (Dec 6, 2009)

a lot. 

there are some things that really are best left in the past, nothing good can come of bringing them up. 

I feel like going into too much detail about your past indiscretions/issues is a fast way to poison a relationship. there really are some things best left untold, because once you hear it, its extremely difficult to un hear and not affect how you see the person.


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## Dat Gyul (Jul 6, 2012)

Nah, he's the only person I feel safe enough to tell everything to, sometimes it shocks me the things I say because I never intended to reveal so much about myself.


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## Bawsome (Jan 8, 2013)

yea and i fear that one day when i get into a deep enough relation ship with some one i might to have to tell her in order to be 100% with her.


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## march_hare (Jan 18, 2006)

I can't think of anything that I wouldn't share.


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## nonethemore (Oct 18, 2010)

If we were very close, I would probably eventually disclose everything. That kind of openness with someone just brings you closer if you're both understanding.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

march_hare said:


> I can't think of anything that I wouldn't share.


Me neither. I've told my current partner everything about me, including things I haven't shared with previous partners.


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## SuicideSilence (May 12, 2013)

Yes, but it wouldn't really concern the other person. There are just some things that I could never tell anyone. But who knows? Maybe if I were to get really close to the other person, I might tell him/her.


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## TheDarkGuardian (Jun 1, 2013)

Depends on how well we knew each other. If we could understand that we humans do make mistakes in our past then I'd be more willing to share secrets.


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## MoonlitMadness (Mar 11, 2013)

No, my past has been quite innocent really lol.


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## tbyrfan (Feb 24, 2011)

Mine knows everything because I talk too much.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

tbyrfan said:


> Mine knows everything because I talk too much.


Pretty much this. All of the dark secrets I have eventually get blabbed out inadvertently. :lol


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## Cam1 (Dec 4, 2011)

Yeah, I don't feel the need to tell a partner everything, some things are personal and not necessary to share.


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## march_hare (Jan 18, 2006)

Actually I have just thought of something - I might not tell them all details about all the problems I had in my previous relationship , especially abusive stuff , unless I knew him really well.


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## Life Aint No Joke (Mar 8, 2013)

Nah, there's no bull sh*t about me and I don't have any baggage. I'm an open book really.



Sphere said:


> Yes i think everyone does especially when it
> comes to past relationships, *nobody would ever admit that an ex was funnier , better in bed and stuff like that,* some things you just have to keep to yourself.


Those wouldn't even be "secrets". That's just sh*t that doesn't need to be said.


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## always starting over (Mar 15, 2013)

Yes. I wish I could forget about them. That's why I smoke weed constantly. I hope it ruins my memory.


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## typemismatch (May 30, 2012)

I like supermarket own brand Rice Crispies as much as I like Kellogs.

There, I've said it.


UUhhh. feels soooo good.


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## Dane (Jul 27, 2009)

No, I would want to share everything.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I have a few secrets that I don't think I could ever tell. Not that I feel terribly bad about it or ashamed but I know what would happen if I told a bf. He'd most likely use it against me every time we got into an argument. Maybe after 30 years of marriage I could tell them.


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## sas111 (Oct 20, 2010)

Well I'm all baggage. Sucks to be him. Pshhh


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## foe (Oct 10, 2010)

I can't think of anything I'd be extremely ashamed of.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

If I ever do get a partner, I don't think I'm going to tell them that I'm a virgin. I'm just gonna say that I don't have a lot of experience. I can't risk someone running away because I'm a virgin.


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## Owl-99 (Mar 7, 2012)

komorikun said:


> Something that they might like to know but you could never tell them. If so, do you think it is something a partner would break up with you if they ever found out?


If you need to get something off your chest you can pm if you like. :b


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

tannasg said:


> If you need to get something off your chest you can pm if you like. :b


It's okay. My sister knows all my secrets.


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

Nope, I tell all.

By partner you mean relationship material right?


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## To22 (Apr 6, 2012)

Oh god lol, but yeah I'd open up entirely eventually.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Canucklehead said:


> Nope, I tell all.
> 
> By partner you mean relationship material right?


boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife


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## PickleNose (Jul 11, 2009)

I'm secretive by nature. Always have been. When I was a kid, I built rooms within rooms to hide in for the simple reason that I didn't like the feeling of being exposed. 

The types of things that are secrets in my mind are kind of random and don't always make sense. There are plenty of things I'd never tell anyone I actually know because I'd feel really weird with them knowing it.

Example. I'm a pants type of person. I have never been one to wear shorts. I feel weird. I think it might be because I have a leg "fetish" so when my legs are exposed, I have this perception that they are being stared at.

I would never actually tell anyone I know why I don't wear shorts. They would (of course) eventually notice if they knew me for long enough that I always wear pants. But even explaining the reasoning behind it is too weird.


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

No. I tell everything to him.


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## Glass Child (Feb 28, 2013)

I will tell him what he wants to learn~ Or whatever comes up.


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## Chapstick (Jun 24, 2013)

All of my biggest secrets are going to be found out anyway, if I get that close to someone.


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## CrimsonTrigger (Jun 28, 2011)

Maybe a couple. I'm not sure really. I'm too honest for my own good sometimes, but like someone above said, some things really are just best left in the past. Dwelling on stuff isn't healthy and telling people about it all the time isn't helpful either. 

There's probably things my partner wouldn't tell me either, so it balances out I guess. Just because we're together in love doesn't mean we need to know every single little thing about each other.


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## NoHeart (May 5, 2012)

Yes, or anyone else for that matter.


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## lava (Jun 13, 2013)

EternallyRestless said:


> If I ever do get a partner, I don't think I'm going to tell them that I'm a virgin. I'm just gonna say that I don't have a lot of experience. I can't risk someone running away because I'm a virgin.


You're gonna be sorry for not telling him when he penetrates you thinking you aren't a virgin... Also, he will easily find out if you bleed after your hymen goes pop (sorry to be so graphic). I guarantee you no dude who you would want to have a lasting relationship with you will care if you're a virgin or not, in fact most would actually prefer it.

I've got nothing to hide, but I think some embarrassing thing or two would take me a few years to tell, so I voted maybe.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

lava said:


> You're gonna be sorry for not telling him when he penetrates you thinking you aren't a virgin... Also, he will easily find out if you bleed after your hymen goes pop (sorry to be so graphic). I guarantee you no dude who you would want to have a lasting relationship with you will care if you're a virgin or not, in fact most would actually prefer it.


Not all girls bleed and the hymen doesn't actually "pop," that's a myth look it up.


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## lava (Jun 13, 2013)

EternallyRestless said:


> Not all girls bleed and the hymen doesn't actually "pop," that's a myth look it up.


Hence why I said IF you bleed. I know it doesn't pop, it tears, but I've never done some intra-vaginal exploration myself so I don't know myself.


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## solasum (Nov 17, 2008)

He thinks I'm secretive, but I don't really keep secrets. I suppose this website counts as one, though I'm more and more likely to divulge this as time passes. I suppose I don't flaunt the fact that I read Cosmo. Also, I wouldn't want him to look through my phone, but I don't know that that makes me secretive.


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

I have a secret I will never tell anyone. But it happened in childhood and is not important any more. Still its much too much to tell anyone. Ever.

As for other things.. I mean theres a few things I do keep from my boyfriend but not much. Some things would hurt him and don't matter anymore, so I just keep them to myself. I usually feel guilty if I don't spill my guts though, so he knows more than most people would probably tell him.


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## Astrofreak6 (Mar 30, 2013)

Yes but maybe with time if I got confortable enough w/ the person I would eventually tell them..


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## Big Game Theory (Jun 16, 2013)

Being on the other end, I would hope that my significant other would feel comfortable to tell me anything. I want to have the deepest connection with her.

I would be okay with her not telling me everything, though. That would be her decision ultimately.

As far as myself, I don't have any secrets that I wouldn't tell a sig other.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

I've never actually done anything I'm extremely ashamed of, but I've definitely had thoughts of things that are better left unsaid (or maybe it's just remains of my OCD), which is equally shameful in my opinion. 

Then again, I don't think anyone should ever know everything about the person they're with (or anyone, for that matter). It'd be like being able to listen to the grass grow; it sounds nice and relaxing in theory, but in reality the sound would be unbearable and impossible to ignore. I know that there are certain things that as much as I'd like I wouldn't be able to forgive in another person. Secrets are good in moderation.


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## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

I was debating with myself, whether to tell her I never had a girlfriend. I dont know what she will think of me. She might think of me as a loser who never had a girlfriend.


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## TheDarkGuardian (Jun 1, 2013)

Only secret I would tell a significant one is that I spend my spare time and money dressing up as a humanoid bat-like entity running around and physically assaulting criminals.


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

No. As far as secrets go we're usually quite honest about them with one another. Dunno if that would be the case if I met anyone else.


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

I'm a miserable little pile of secrets, but i shared most of them with my girlfriend. Some secrets shouldn't be shared with anyone though.


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## John316C (May 1, 2011)

Yes, I wouldn't tell my partner unless it was a concern for them. We are _separate_ beings.


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## WBK2013 (Apr 15, 2013)

I would want to share everything but it would take a lot of trust and a long time. It may not ever be long enough, so I voted yes.


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

Just saw this thread. Interesting topic. What to share and what not to. The hookers? The psych hospital? Looks like most people keep secrets.


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## OtherBrain (Jul 4, 2013)

Business is business


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

Yes.


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## Lazercarp1 (Jul 2, 2013)

yes lots my past has skeletons of pretty much every kind in it


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## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

Nothing that immediately comes to mind, but I'm sure there are things I'd rather keep to myself.


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## tieffers (Jan 26, 2013)

There are _a lot_ of things I'm really ashamed of. But I'm a compulsive truth-teller, especially to people I love, and I sometimes feel guilty not confessing things. I worry omission is the same as a lie. I usually don't talk about much unless I'm asked, but no, there's not a thing I would keep secret from my partner.


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## VIncymon (Apr 16, 2009)

Well, it's no secret but my last break up ended in a a very embarrassing way. Let's just say my previous girlfriend cheated on me in such a shameless way, that I felt like jumping of a building.

However ... once I was able to tell my new girlfriend what happened...I finally let go of the intense anger.


Less secrets less stress


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## lzzy (Nov 28, 2012)

Nope, don't think I do!
It feels good to be able to talk about certain things with your partner! 

Honesty is important


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Some things are judged harshly and can never be spoken of.


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## AmandaMarie87 (Apr 24, 2013)

I don't have any big secrets (except for my lack of experience) but I do have some idiosyncrasies that although aren't harmful he might perceive as being odd. I also sometimes have intrusive thoughts that I'd rather keep to myself.


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## OutOfControlPanel (Jul 14, 2012)

N/A


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## cafune (Jan 11, 2011)

I used to think that transparency was important and a reasonable expectation/standard in relationships, but over the past year, I've come to realize that some people have a lot more to hide/bury than others.

There are a few things that I'd be _extremely_ hesitant to disclose because of a dreadful mixture of shame, avoidance and trust/vulnerability issues on my part, but it's likely that I'd open up eventually.. especially because I'd really love for someone to _know_ and accept me, and if I keep my secrets, they'll never know why I tick the way I do, rendering that level of understanding impossible.

"So many people are shut up tight inside themselves like boxes, yet they would open up, unfolding quite wonderfully, if only you were * interested in them." (Sylvia Plath)
&#8230; Add "empathetic, kind and" to *, and it basically covers my feelings on this.


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## Unkn0wn Pleasures (Nov 24, 2011)

I've shared some things that I planned to keep to myself. But there are a couple of secrets that I will NEVER share. Would he break up with me if I did? Probably not. I don't know.


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## SuperSky (Feb 16, 2011)

I can't think of anything right now, but I'm not sure if anything would come up in the future. I'm really not exciting enough to have major secrets.


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## my3rdmolars (Nov 23, 2012)

failures in some areas of my life, some friendzone stories, and past relationships that reveal how beta male i was. of course, i would like to make an alpha male impression


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

I guess it would be best to leave out the part where I slept with a married man before, just going on a hunch. Or that I lost my virginity to a guy I met online because I have such anxiety around the concept of men & sex.

ffff those things are going with me to the deathbed. I have no problem withholding. BS "honesty is the best policy".


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## x Faceless x (Mar 13, 2011)

Not really. I'm pretty open about everything with him.


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