# Does life get better after high school?



## Laboratory Rat (Mar 1, 2014)

Hello, Laboratory Rat here. My first big post here.

I'd just like to share a bit of my life story with you here and ask for advice and support.

I'm 16 and half years old, as you can see. 2nd grade of high school, and my life is-complete HELL!

I've lost count of how many times I were nearly suicidal and completely depressed. However, don't worry for my life, I'm nowhere near suicide. I know life is too precious and worthy to even think of such a thing.
But then, I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. On the one side, you just have to live. Death is too bad. But on the other side, living is pure agony.

I don't have any serious SA symptoms, but I'm one depressive, bored to hell, grumpy f**k. That's why I joined here.

Now let's begin with the topic.
It wasn't always like this. Just a couple of years ago I was your completely normal kid. I lived in a neighborhood I loved, I knew people I appreciated and vice-versa, I had lots of fun, no worries and my life was pure enjoyment.

But it all changed when I went to high school. And to make things worse, we moved house, in the suburbs! And even though we're living in a huge, spacious house with beautiful interior, I feel completely bad about it. I got used living in a small, comfy flat, with the schools, hospitals, shops, parks and else all in my near surroundings. Now, I don't know anyone in the neighborhood, and I can't go anywhere else other than my house. There's no public surface-only private properties and yards completely closed with fence.

But moving is the smaller and less important part.
The thing is, the way of living in high school is one hell of suffering, pain and misery.

Let me describe you one of my stupid days-and every day is completely identical.
-6:20 AM, I wake up. I have breakfast, I get ready for school and about 6:50 I am at the bus stop.
-8 AM, I'm at the school. The pain starts. For the next 5 to 6 hours, I just keep sitting like a statue, completely frozen in my desk. It seems like days...
-But at around 14:40, I'm back home. I have lunch.
-It's 15 hours...I have a bit of fun on my PC, for about half an hour.
-16 in the afternoon. I start studying. Due to the fact I have about 15 different subjects, learning takes 3 to 4, and on the before-test days up to 6 hours. At around 20, I'm done with the work, and completely mentally maimed, tired and grumpy.
-Around 20, I have dinner.
-From 20:30 to 21:30 I watch TV, even though the channels suck.
-To 22 PM, I read a bit about fun scientific things, or some book.
-I wash my teeth, get ready for sleep, and I sleep...

And the next morning, I wake up and it's completely same...again and again...and it's been like this for 2 years already. And I have 2 more years to go.
Not to mention, I never get out of my house apart from going to school. A living hell.

My problems are;
-The high school kids are really a bunch of losers. That's right, losers. I'm not the 'tough guy', I'm exactly quite the opposite. They see *me* as a loser.

But could their lives be any more shallow? All they do is smoking, drinking, 'partying' (if you consider jumping to ****ty music in some hole they call 'club' partying). They are stupid as hell and nowhere near my level

-The teachers are a pain in the ***. I hate them all, except 2 or three I find interesting and who have understanding.
The interesting thing is, some teachers seem like they don't know anything about the subject they are teaching. The classes are boring like hell. What they teach, I already know. What I don't know, they don't know either...

I'm not doing bad in school-actually, I'm one of the best students in my class. But it's a pain in the *** to sit like an idiot, doing nothing for 6 hours straight.

-There's no fun in my life. I'm stuck in a vicious circle of studying, in school and at home.

-I have no freedom. I have to eat what my parents eat, live where my parents live, do what they say. It's like a prison.

I want to get out. I know I will, but it seems to long. I'm only nearly half way through, and I already got depressive.

So my question is, does life really get better after high school? Can you describe me the ups and downs? What is it look like?
I'd like to work a job I like, doing something useful, having a family, my own house, my own car, spending my time how I want, reading, working out, having fun, eating nice food, listening to nice music and living a nice, relaxed life.

Thanks for all the answers and info, 
Laboratory Rat


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## Laboratory Rat (Mar 1, 2014)

I see people are voting, yet no one is commenting.

Can anyone give me advice or information? Anyone?

My problems aren't girls, no friends or me not being the cool guy...
Anyone?


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

Depending on your environment, it can either get better or it can get hellishly worse. The adult world is cold and unforgiving, especially when you are thrust into it alone and without any guidance.

When you are limited by money and an insane work schedule, you can't really go out and build a social life even without SA.

Now if you have rich parents that will give you a free ride through life ( Like so many others that I know ) Then you should be fine and things will get better.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

RelinquishedHell said:


> Depending on your environment it can either get better or it can get hellishly worse.


Umm, yes - way too many factors to give a direct answer...

Once high school finishes, some problems go away, but new ones surface.

How well you do in adult life depends on a lot of things: Your mental, physical, and emotional health, your sociability, your intelligence, your ambition/motivation, your ability to adapt to different situations, your work ethic, how well you handle stress, what kind of connections you have, what kind of support you have, and the list goes on.


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## Laboratory Rat (Mar 1, 2014)

Thank you two for the comments and answer.

I guess I have to provide some information to give you an idea of my predispositions;
-I am intelligent (I do very well at school and people often get amazed by amount of my knowledge)
-I am good in socializing-I have nice tone of speech, and I am good speaker. The problem is, I am bad at socializing with my peers as I'm just not stupid enough to realize what they find interesting in getting drunk.
-I come from a medium class family. We're not rich, but not poor either. And building this house we have has finally ended all our worries about future place of living
-I am a good worker, but I need a lot of time to start. However, once I start I don't stop until I'm finished.
-I'm painfully disorganized. Although I try to be tidy, I need huge amounts of time to organize everything
-I'm adaptable to lots of situations
-I don't need mountains of gold to be happy. I'd be fine with my own house, my own car and a safe job to feed a family.

Also, could you describe the bad and good aspects of post HS/post college life?

If anyone is up for a chat, PM me.

Cheers!


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## Shadowboy (Jun 12, 2013)

I agree too that some problems end and new ones start.

For example parents may get less controlling and you have more freedom in decision but in return you get more responsibilities and may feel suffocated under them.

Work life and all the stress concerning it is usually the main concern after graduation. You may feel more stressed than you feel in high school because you have to take your first serious step in work life and may feel more anxious about how your future will be if you don't have a clear career to follow at that time.


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## monotonous (Feb 1, 2013)

depends generally speaking yes


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## Lasair (Jan 25, 2010)

I moved away from home for college and life got 80% worse for the first year and then 100% better in my second and I am now in my forth.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

That post is too long to read but yes.


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

Yes it does (in most ways that matter).


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## Ms Yesterday (Jan 28, 2013)

Better in some respects, a lot scarier in others. 
Also if you plan on making friends with your peers, stop acting like you're superior because you don't party. It doesn't make them morons. 
For me becoming independent still terrifies me, however going into my second year of uni now I can honestly say it's 100% better than highschool for me.
Still, make the most of your time while you're there.


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## loophole (Apr 15, 2012)

Yes it does but won't solve all your problems. Having 0 friends helps if u ask me. No pun intended.


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## JH1983 (Nov 14, 2013)

Yes.


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## Laboratory Rat (Mar 1, 2014)

Ms Yesterday said:


> Also if you plan on making friends with your peers, stop acting like you're superior because you don't party. It doesn't make them morons.


No...you got it a bit wrong. I'm not a pretentious little ***** with the 'holier than thou' attitude, but it's my peers who see anyone not smoking, drinking and 'partying wild' as 'loser' or 'lame'. They are the ones who need to mock others to hide their own insecurity. And I don't need friends at this moment. After high school, i would probably not see most of them ever again, just like it is with my primary school friends.

Right now, I'm focused on learning and securing foundations for a future job and career.



> For me becoming independent still terrifies me, however going into my second year of uni now I can honestly say it's 100% better than highschool for me.


That's why I'm asking. I heard people saying (at least the ones who really remember downsides of hs, not just the fact that you don't pay bills and taxes) that it actually gets better in and after college. And considering the hell high school is, I can't hope for anything except improvement.



> Still, make the most of your time while you're there.


Yes, certainly. And by making the most out of my time here, I mean keeping my grades in good shape.

Thank you too for the answer!


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## Maryanne1986 (Feb 28, 2014)

Just Lurking said:


> Umm, yes - way too many factors to give a direct answer...
> 
> Once high school finishes, some problems go away, but new ones surface.
> 
> How well you do in adult life depends on a lot of things: Your mental, physical, and emotional health, your sociability, your intelligence, your ambition/motivation, your ability to adapt to different situations, your work ethic, how well you handle stress, what kind of connections you have, what kind of support you have, and the list goes on.


Spot on .. you leave behind the bullies of your childhood and enter a more free - do it your own way world. Then relationships start and bills come haha but in my opinion - after being bulled from 3 to 16 when i left school leaving school was amazing and id rather have the bills and bad relationships to go back to having constant agro every day :boogie


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## MaxAnxiety (Feb 1, 2014)

college is 100% better there's no comparison in my eyes. After college is still better but having to work and pay bills kinda sucks


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## Pearson99 (Feb 23, 2014)

Although I HATED high school, college wasn't much of an upgrade in my experience. For one, my extreme shyness that I acquired from high school still hung over throughout my freshman year of college. Now as a sophomore, I've only felt more deterred to hang out with anyone as I can't ever hold a decent conversation with the fifty-year-old lunch lady who prepares my sandwich.


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## InfiniteBlaze (Jan 27, 2011)

College is definitely better than high school. There's almost no bullying in college and you have more freedom.


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## EmotionlessThug (Oct 4, 2011)

No.


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## VinBZ (Nov 2, 2013)

Yes, people will become more mature after high school and be easier to get along with. And so will you.


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## MetroCard (Nov 24, 2013)

I hope so. I hate being in high school.


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## ihatelife (Sep 11, 2011)

Life does not get better. The term "Life Gets Better" is the most oversaid phrase that is told primarily to suicidal teens. I'm 18 and started my first year of college. Through out my entire high school life I was suicidal and depressed. They kept telling me "it gets better". I tried very hard to change myself and work hard. When I left high school I had three goals for when I left high school. 1. Get a mustang, 2. get a girlfriend and 3. stop being a depressed loser. I turn 18 on Dec, 29.2013 and I only achieved one of my goals. So im still suicidal, alone and depressed. I talk to different counselors and therapists every day. I tell them I wouldn't kill myself if they give me a reason and I tell them they cant say or quote "life gets better". None of them have anything to say after


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

It doesn't get better,nor does it get worse you know why?It is because it all depends,it depends what you do,if you continue to follow your schedule everyday,of course its going to seem boring.Of course leave time to do your homework,but try doing something different such as walking around the neighborhood,or join a club at school etcetera


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## Grog (Sep 13, 2013)

School becomes insignificant as you get older don't worry about any of it 

Just get top grades get good job live happy life 
Get poor grades ends up with poor hard job and has not so happy life 

Simple as that you say you don't need a lot of money but the reality is money does provide comfort, security, happiness and life is less stressful if your not needing . 
Life is very different when you get to late 20s and again 30s and that's when it really begins so the better set up you are the better that will be . Do the hard word early rather than later when it's even harder to catch up .


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## M0rbid (Jan 11, 2011)

No....It.....Does.....Not....


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## quiet as kept (Mar 3, 2014)

for me it did, I hated high school so when i was all done with it, it was a releif, I slept in everyday, did what i want when i wanted and didnt have to worry about dealing with idiots all day coming up to me and saying "do you talk?" "der jus cuz sumbudy iz queit n duznt talk 2 me den dey muss nevr talk or sumthn derrr" haha people are stupid


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## Sacrieur (Jan 14, 2013)

Ha no.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Only if your high school experience was really, really, really bad (like mine.) So everything seems better by comparison. Or if you're really proactive at making your life better.


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## invisibleisadora (Mar 3, 2014)

I can't believe there is another one in this world living just like as I live. My life is basically: 
* Studying all day;
* Having no fun and no friends;
* Never having freedom ;
* Living stuck in this ****ing town .
I also would like to know if life gets better after high school... It's nice to know that generally it does.


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## invisibleisadora (Mar 3, 2014)

I can't believe there is another one in this world living just like I live. My life is basically: 
* Studying all day;
* Having no fun and no friends;
* Never having freedom ;
* Living stuck in this ****ing town .
I also would like to know if life gets better after high school... It's nice to know that generally it does.


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## Laboratory Rat (Mar 1, 2014)

invisibleisadora said:


> I can't believe there is another one in this world living just like as I live. My life is basically:
> * Studying all day;
> * Having no fun and no friends;
> * Never having freedom ;
> ...


Which sums up high school pretty much...

I'm a responsible person, even though I can't take a lot of stress. But I'd be able to deal with anything if I see it makes some sense. For example, my father always got mad when he had to take me to kindergarten. But hey, what's the fuss about? You just have to walk and you're doing something useful.

However, I see no logic in studying mountains of subject material I don't like just to get into a good university.

But most of the guys here say it improves...it gives me a small piece of hope.


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## SA go0n (Mar 5, 2014)

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. I'm not saying everything is going to be a bed of roses, but for someone with SA high school can be hell.


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## JohnWalnut (May 2, 2012)

College is about partying and drugs and whatnot even more so than high school. Also, the workload is higher. The only improvement that I can see for you is that you will be more independent.


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## Socialanxiety11 (Oct 3, 2011)

No, well at least for me it didn't.


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## SuperSaiyanGod (Jan 21, 2014)

My life hasn't seen much improvement since high school.


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## ShadowOnTheWall (Dec 24, 2010)

It gets better, but you have to make more effort to direct yourself and you're life. I'd say the tradeoffs are more than worth it though


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## sanspants08 (Oct 21, 2008)

azstl25 said:


> Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. I'm not saying everything is going to be a bed of roses, but for someone with SA high school can be hell.


This. I could tell you the reasons why it gets better all day, without doing justice to how much better you'll feel once you're away from all of those immature idiots :roll.


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## MyChi (Jun 30, 2013)

For me, life after high school just meant more time being with 30+ people. Which to me is a very bad thing because I never met any in my own age for 2 straight years. I was totally isolated and ignorant. I didn't even realize that I was actually very lonely until I quit my work in an office. Why the hell would you start work in an office when you have no friends? That's like moving to Antarctica thinking you'd have a chance meeting some nice people only to realize there are only polar bears and penguins.

I recently started studying again, but problem now is that the class I'm in does not have many in my own age which in return means it's hard to keep contact. Hopefully I'll switch to a college/university this summer and I'll be back on track again.

I really miss the opportunity I had in high school. I just blew it because I didn't realize who I was and what I was becoming.


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## DomeAloud (Mar 8, 2014)

As for me, life got a bit better. I make money, I have my own apartment and more free time. However, I hate my job and I wish I could do something else. Overall: Work > School.


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## oood (Nov 1, 2012)

I had a pretty miserable time in HS and always dreamed about the great 'after'. Only to find out I'm too lazy, apathetic and avoidant to accomplish things out of my own volition. So I guess it depends on how developed your sense of initiative and responsibility is. I think I need to mature mentally by at least 5 years.


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## alex9498 (Aug 15, 2011)

Life is way better after high school!!!


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## pens001 (Mar 19, 2014)

Not really. I've been depressed since the end of middle school (I'm 20 now), and I used to count down the years till I finally graduated. Well now that I'm graduated, BAM I wish I so hard that I could go back to being a high schooler. High school sucked for me as well.. In fact I was SO suicidal for a year, and I skipped so much school the school authorities wanted to send to one of those schools for *****ed up kids. My parents were overbearing and strict at the time, and they always yelled at me about how I'm a failure and I don't belong in the family and such. 

I barely made it into college, but I did. I always thought college would be amazing, the best years of my life, and that it would be different from high school. But I don't like it.. Alot of the kids at my school are so driven, and look down on me for not being ambitious. I really don't know what I want though, and I thought college was the time where you're able to experiment and find out what you like, but that is not how it is like at my school - Perhaps, the school I'm at just isn't for me? But anyway, all I ever hear people talk about is their plans for med school, dental school, etc. Everyone is building their futures, and there's me, lost and apathetic. I hate it and I wish I could go back to high school where I didn't have to worry as much about my future... but maybe that's just me.


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## jjj21 (Feb 24, 2012)

Pros:
-more freedom.
-if you move away for college, you get to live independently.
-people are less superficial.
-lots of opportunities to make friends in college.
-for people that like to drink or party, there’s plenty of opportunities to do so.
-lots of opportunities to hook up or get into a relationship.
-depending on your degree, GPA and how much internship experience you had, you could make a decent amount of money when you graduate.
-a lot of people change for the better in college.

Cons:
-what you do in college can potentially determine your future in terms of your career.
-if you do badly in college, it could ruin your future, like making it very hard to find a job or get into grad school (because of things like low GPA, not getting an internship).
-studying can be extremely stressful.
-people with very bad social anxiety will have trouble with classes that require group work.
-depending on your major, classes can be very difficult.
-you can have a lot of debt when you graduate.
-some people graduate with a degree that isn’t very employable.
-some people who were awkward in high school might still be awkward in college and have trouble fitting in.

Overall, I’d say college has more advantages than disadvantages. For me, college helped me develop my social skills. I was extremely socially awkward in high school, but over time, I became more normal social-wise and I was able to get along with people better.

However, I think that once you get out of college, life becomes much worse and much more stressful. You’re out in the real world and you have to support yourself. Once you get a job, you’ll have very little free time. Another problem is that it’s extremely hard to meet people if you’re not in school. If you’re in college (or high school), even if you aren’t having lots of fun, you should enjoy the lack of responsibility before you get out into the real world.


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## Thanatar18 (Apr 27, 2014)

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-life-actually-does-get-better/
...all I needed to know 
That being said, I can't really claim much knowledge yet in the sense that I've been a recluse/am still a recluse to an extent, and currently my old classmates are graduating g12 right around this time of year...
But the article did make me feel a bit more optimistic about what happens next.


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## Peme (Jul 17, 2013)

No. Depending on what you do, you can immediately get swamped with mass amounts of work, responsibility, expenses, pressure, stress, and depression, but that can happen at any age.

Personally, my HS days were easy and carefree.


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## Aviatrix (Apr 28, 2014)

Everyone's experience will differ.

Most areas of my life got better after high school. I enjoyed living alone for a few years, I enjoyed going to college and studying my lifelong passion, I enjoyed the independence and autonomy and having more control over my life, and I met my now-husband during those post-high school years.

But I'm sure everyone will agree that growing up isn't all puppies and rainbows. Supporting yourself and learning to manage your own finances can be stressful until you really get the hang of it... and even sometimes after you get the hang of it. And college is a ton of work and very stress-inducing, and (in my experience, at least) professors/faculty don't always treat students like true adults, even if you have your own household, are financially independent, gainfully employed, etc. The workload during my last two years of college as almost more than I could handle while juggling adult responsibilities, and I had bouts of anxiety and depression because of it. High school < life after high school < life after college. For me, at least.


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

High school is the epitome of hell


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*It starts getting better*

but when your employer puts you out the door, you're retired.

Nobody else is gonna take you on


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## HanSolo (Jul 5, 2013)

Well more than anything I missed seeing the girls everyday and the 1s I crushed on. But my head was some broken after those years, I carried all that stuff right into university, got even fatter living away from home, and spoke to way less people and girls. And skipped class all the time to avoid the the social maze, and to get high.

So actually it got worse for me, but what stayed the same or probably got worse was just going into new situations as my old "loser" self.

I'm still doing that after just finally starting going to bars. If I felt cooler, I would be cooler. Thats the whole introvert/extrovert thing, many of my fun and attractive qualities are suppressed due to my problems.


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## slowlyimproving (Jan 2, 2014)

VinBZ said:


> Yes, people will become more mature after high school and be easier to get along with. And so will you.


^ Very true. If you want life to get better, you have to work on your issues. The sooner you start, the better. You don't want to end up as someone who just complains and hates all people.

That being said, life is tough and sometimes very unfair. But, most people are good. We all have our burdens, struggles and issues.


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## garrysingh817 (Mar 27, 2014)

Depending on your environment,


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