# Do you care if your bf/gf has similar interests to you?



## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

How much does it matter in a relationship if your significant other has similar interests to you (activities, hobbies, books, movies, music) ?


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## shadowmask (Jun 22, 2009)

Not at all. In fact, I often find I'm turned off by girls who share similar interests with me. It makes them less intriguing and I don't want to be reminded of myself too much in someone else.


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## Luna Sea (Apr 4, 2012)

Yes. My last relationship failed because we didn't have enough in common, so her being around stopped me from doing the things I wanted to do, and it got boring.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Yes, I care. I want a guy who shares some of my interests. I would love to go to an anime convention with him for example. Playing video games together would also be fun. :b


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## Luna Sea (Apr 4, 2012)

mezzoforte said:


> Yes, I care. I want a guy who shares some of my interests. I would love to go to an anime convention with him for example. Playing video games together would also be fun. :b


Marry me!


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## MrGilligan (Apr 29, 2012)

I don't date, but if I did, I'd want my boyfriend/girlfriend to have similar interests. I would hate to go to the movies and have to see something he/she wants instead of what I want, or have to go to dinner someplace I don't like just because he or she likes it... And listening to music in the car... I'd want it to be what I like... This is actually one of the reasons I feel I'd never want to date / marry anyone. I just don't want to make those sacrifices. I want to do what I want...


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## NatureFellow (Jun 14, 2011)

I'll have you know that my right hand and I have a lot in common.


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## Xtraneous (Oct 18, 2011)

Gotta have a little bit in common at-least. o;


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

As long as they can show _some_ interest in motor racing, then it's all good. Music, hobbies etc. no big deal really, I've never met anyone irl who likes those kinds of activities I enjoy anyway.


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## AfarOff (Mar 29, 2012)

Interests? Not really. I'm more concerned with values and life outlook. I don't care if they don't have a hobby that I do, (Which is extremely unlikely anyway...)or like different music. Unless I have an elaborate reason as to why I don't like something that they like or do.


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## Daft (Jan 5, 2012)

I think it matters somewhat. With no common ground when it comes to interests (and this doesn't just include type of music, type of movies, etc), there's really no way to build meaningful rapport and keep it going over the years. I mean, I guess there's always sex and talking about the weather or college/the kids/the bills, but...

Not to mention, there's more likely to be conflicts over how time is spent and on what.


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## Corvus Cowl (Apr 25, 2012)

Yeah I need a women who at least has similar interests to keep me interested. I'm not asking for a female replica of myself, but someone I can shoot in Halo while laughing at one another while calling each other noobs or perhaps watch a cheesy horror film and laugh at it. I don't need a women who has my same exact agenda. It would probably get boring just playing video games all of the time.

As I said similar interests are enough for me, She could be into anime (I'm okay with anime, but not really a fan of it). I am into sci-fi and medieval-fantasy type stuff. We could get each other more interested into each of our interests a bit more, which can help forge our relationship a bit by learning more about each other and in the process perhaps find out something we like that we did not know of.


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## Double Indemnity (Aug 15, 2011)

It's important to me that we share similar interests and have the same taste in movies, music, etc. I'm willing to branch out a bit but I know what I like (and don't like) to spend time on.


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## Marakunda (Jun 7, 2011)

THE most important thing about relationships in my opinion, they just wouldn't work otherwise. You would bore each other to death...


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## sean88 (Apr 29, 2006)

It's very important that we have similar interests. If she's not into similar music as me it's almost a dealbreaker.


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## gusstaf (Jan 1, 2012)

One or two similar interests would certainly be nice, but I don't want to date a clone of myself.


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## shelbster18 (Oct 8, 2011)

It only matters a little bit to me. I wouldn't care if the guy listened to Justin Bieber. :b If he was attractive and had a nice personality, that's all that matters. He just has to have a few things in common with me and then we're good to go.


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## Disastuh (Mar 20, 2010)

It is extremely important to me.


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## Tentative (Dec 27, 2011)

Very important; it's fun to be able to enjoy things together. Wouldn't want to be forced to go do something I'm not interested in, and vice versa. I feel more of a connection if the other person has similar interests, especially interests in music.


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## Lmatic3030 (Nov 3, 2011)

My GF and I didn't have too many similar interests at first. I think really the only thing we had in common was the music we listened to. As we got to know each other better we started to take up each others interests. 

So no i guess it's not a big deal to me. But I'm always open to exploring my significant others interests so, it's nice we when they share that same open mind .


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## UgShy (Mar 6, 2012)

This matters lots. If you don't have similar interests, how are you even clicking? I think without similar interests it's doomed to fail


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## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

Honestly, it's not all that important. It's good to have a few things in common so you can occasionally see a movie together or go to a concert or something, but a good relationship != sitting around talking about which bands you like. 

It's more important to really click with someone, though I'm not sure I can explain how that works.


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## TryingMara (Mar 25, 2012)

It matters to some extent. I want us to have something in common. I would think that having everything in common as well as having nothing in common would be pretty boring. I would want us to share a few things, that way it would probably be easy for us to get to know each other too..more to talk about and do together.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

As long we have something in common but not everything in common.


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## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

diamondheart89 said:


> As long we have something in common but not everything in common.


Ok, who are you comitting adultery with?


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## Ape in space (May 31, 2010)

I don't care so much about the specific interests. What's more important is that our general outlooks and inclinations match. For example, I want someone who likes talking about deep stuff, and who isn't too serious or rigid.

If she likes painting caves while I don't, that doesn't matter at all. But if she likes hunting, that's going to be a big problem, because that goes against my whole world view.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Resonance said:


> Ok, who are you comitting adultery with?


Oh sorry, as long as we have everything in common but something not in common.


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## Midnight Laces (May 5, 2012)

_I'm a girl and this only matters somewhat._

Well, I don't want someone to be exactly like me. If I want that, there's always masturbation.

Ahem, in other news, I like someone to be kind of into what I'm into but also likes other things that I never would have liked.

I hope that makes sense?


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## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

diamondheart89 said:


> Oh sorry, as long as we have everything in common but something not in common.


Damn straight


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

So now the question is: Why do girls seem to care about this more than guys do?


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## regimes (Aug 24, 2011)

well yes, otherwise i have no idea what i'd talk to them about.


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## anonymid (Oct 16, 2005)

It's pretty important to me. There has to be more than just common interests, of course, and it's not like we'd have to have _everything_ in common. But it's just a lot more fun when there's a base of shared hobbies, tastes, etc. It's just much easier to bond with the other person that way.


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## Jinxx (May 10, 2011)

It only somewhat matters to me. I enjoy someone I'm dating having the same interests as me but its also pretty fun to get introduced to new interests.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

yeah need some things in common. love that my gf has similar taste in movies to me. completely different taste in music though.


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## Who (Jul 29, 2010)

Best would be some similar interests and some different interests. If we're completely similar that would be kind of boring. As long as our interests are not conflicting. Like I'm not interested in cars and I don't expect my guy to be interested in shopping but we still have some things that both of us like.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

Isn't personality compatibility much more important?


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## SoWrongItsRight (May 9, 2012)

Lmatic3030 said:


> My GF and I didn't have too many similar interests at first. I think really the only thing we had in common was the music we listened to. As we got to know each other better we started to take up each others interests.
> 
> So no i guess it's not a big deal to me. But I'm always open to exploring my significant others interests so, it's nice we when they share that same open mind .


Agreed


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## MoniqueS (Feb 21, 2011)

It is important to the extent I would want a future boyfriend to have interest in traveling with me and not wanting to have children at any point. The rest I think we could work out.


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

The ideal would be to date a man who has interests I have never pursued but am open to try. Being introduced to something new and fun by a guy I'm interested in sounds like a wonderful experience. 

I'd still date somebody who engaged in the same hobbies as I do. And I'd still date someone who's interests bore me. It'd just be harder a lot to find something exciting to do together.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

What about a guy who's only interested in geeky stuff like science and technology and politics and a girl who's really artistic. Could that ever work out? What would they talk about? :um


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## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

arnie said:


> What would they talk about? :um


Well, if they're both intelligent, he could tell her about particle physics, new technology, and she can teach him a little about Renoir. or other.. stuff. So they make learning fun.


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## gusstaf (Jan 1, 2012)

arnie said:


> What about a guy who's only interested in geeky stuff like science and technology and politics and a girl who's really artistic. Could that ever work out? What would they talk about? :um


Artistic girls can still be geeky. You'd be surprised.


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## meepie (Jun 20, 2010)

I like someone with a somewhat of different interests because I like to learn about new things. The only thing I would like is their interests to be in is something that isn't too extreme. I am sort of a nerdy person myself so to find another nerd with their interests in another field would be nice.


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## Witan (Jun 13, 2009)

I chose don't care/only matters somewhat.

I want us to have something in common, but we don't have to be carbon copies of one another.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

arnie said:


> What about a guy who's only interested in geeky stuff like science and technology and politics and a girl who's really artistic. Could that ever work out? What would they talk about? :um


Well people don't really don't fall into two categories perfectly and can't mingle in other categories, like once science person can still get along with an artsy person, as long as they're interested in learning about what the other person's interested in. And there's plenty of things in between science and art to talk about and do.


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## Meli24R (Dec 9, 2008)

I think it's fine and even good to have some different interests, but I'd want to have some things in common. I enjoy traveling for example and it's important that I find someone who would enjoy doing this with me. The relationship would get super boring very quickly if we didn't share _any_ interests.


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## PickleNose (Jul 11, 2009)

I'm not looking so this is all hypothetical.

I guess I'd have to say I kind of like contrary women. I think it's sexy. It pisses me off when men disagree with me but it's somehow different with women. But I might get tired of arguing after 20 years or so.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

PickleNose said:


> I'm not looking so this is all hypothetical.
> 
> I guess I'd have to say I kind of like contrary women. I think it's sexy. It pisses me off when men disagree with me but it's somehow different with women. But I might get tired of arguing after 20 years or so.


After 20 years all you do is read your books at the restuarant and only talk to ask about the check. Case study: My parents.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

Barette said:


> Well people don't really don't fall into two categories perfectly and can't mingle in other categories, like once science person can still get along with an artsy person, as long as they're interested in learning about what the other person's interested in.


I guess the main thing is that she isn't super shallow and follows celebrity gossip everyday.



Barette said:


> And there's plenty of things in between science and art to talk about and do.


Oh really?


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## Marlon (Jun 27, 2011)

I want a girl that I have a lot in common with, especially with goals in life. I'm not a big talker, so doing things together that we both enjoy would compensate a little bit.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

arnie said:


> I guess the main thing is that she isn't super shallow and follows celebrity gossip everyday
> 
> Oh really?


Well I'm pretty guilty of following celebrity gossip, and so is my mom, but we still talk to each other about politics and such. I don't think my love of gossip makes me shallow, just a person that really enjoys judging people I don't know. But I can see your point, a fair amount of people would rather talk about the KStew breakup than the upcoming election.

But yeah, you can have different interests with someone and still get along really well.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

Barette said:


> Well I'm pretty guilty of following celebrity gossip, and so is my mom, but we still talk to each other about politics and such. I don't think my love of gossip makes me shallow, just a person that really enjoys judging people I don't know. But I can see your point, a fair amount of people would rather talk about the KStew breakup than the upcoming election.
> 
> But yeah, you can have different interests with someone and still get along really well.


It's good that you follow politics. Most people don't have a clue what's going on the world. Like how the majority of Americans are opposed to Obamacare because they think it's socialism, but when you don't call it that and ask about it's individual parts, then everyone thinks it's a great idea.

http://maddowblog.msnbc.com/_news/2...larity-of-obamacare-at-least-whats-in-it?lite


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

arnie said:


> It's good that you follow politics. Most people don't have a clue what's going on the world. Like how the majority of Americans are opposed to Obamacare because they think it's socialism, but when you don't call it that and ask about it's individual parts, then everyone thinks it's a great idea.
> 
> http://maddowblog.msnbc.com/_news/2...larity-of-obamacare-at-least-whats-in-it?lite


Haha I know, my grandma still believes Obamacare means putting old people to sleep.


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## 50piecesteve (Feb 28, 2012)

I have to have fun with her if its gonna last, so yeah


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

A lot. I would never date anyone I didn't have a lot in common with, and to be honest the only people who do actually speak to me do have things in common xD. But yeah... pretty much need to be geekish, I guess.


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## avoidobot3000 (Aug 22, 2010)

I think it's good to have a few things in common, but it matters more what their personality is like and whether you feel comfortable around them. I think it would be boring to be with someone who had all the same interests.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

yes I do care some what


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## Kingpin (Nov 8, 2011)

Yeah, I do care somewhat. I don't want to end up talking exclusively about work like my parents did.


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## march_hare (Jan 18, 2006)

I marked that it was important to me... but thinking about it further - it could work perfectly fine if the personality and/or general life outlook matched - but the interests could be different.
Also it depends on the nature of the interests.


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## Soilwork (May 14, 2012)

Well I suppose it would be easier if we had at least some similar interests. However, unlike some people on here, I'm not going to rule someone out just because they don't like the same genre of music as I do etc.


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## mysterioussoul (Jul 17, 2010)

Yes, we have to have something in common. People tend to be attracted to others who are similar to them.


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## Charcoal (Apr 15, 2012)

Some things in common would be nice. I'm not one to stay inside for long without going stir crazy, and don't mind most outdoor events. But he doesn't have to be interested in biology and animals the way I am.


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## Christian S (Aug 2, 2012)

We should share a few interests, but I'm the type that likes to learn about people and hear/learn about what they love. So it's only somewhat important.


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## louiselouisa (Jul 12, 2012)

if we have something in common, no matter how little it is, it will be ideal.

but to think about it, the only guy I felt comfortable to be around didn't really have something in common with me. I kinda liked him, but too bad he was gay.


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## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

It'd matter a lot to me!


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