# Missed opportunities in high school :/



## Just Different (Jun 2, 2011)

My junior year ends next week. I have one more year to go before I graduate. High school is nothing like I expected it to be back in elementary school. I thought I would have lots of friends, have a boyfriend and be going out all the time. Nope it's the complete opposite. I feel really pathetic and am very envious of all the other kids. It seems like everybody has a social life except me. I feel like I'm the only one stuck at home every single weekend. 

Seeing my newsfeed on facebook depresses me even more. Everybody posts pictures of the parties they go to and what they do. Everyone has plans almost every single day. Everyone has a lot of people that want to hang out with them. Meanwhile here I am sitting at home everyday all day with no invites. I have like 5 real friends but it's not like I can hang out with them ALL the time, they have other plans and their own exciting lives. 

I've never had a boyfriend, never kissed a guy, didn't have a date for junior prom, can barely talk to anyone, only went to 1 sweet 16 (everyone else went to like 10), etc. the list goes on. What really sucks is that a lot of guys have said I was cute and all, but then once they make an attempt to talk to me and clearly see that I'm socially inept, they never speak to me again  I'm jealous of everybody at school. They all make friends so easily. They make it look so easy. I sometimes can't even make eye contact with people (especially guys). I'm scared out of my mind of talking because I just can't think. My mind goes blank and I can't think of ANYTHING "good", "fun" or interesting to say. When I do speak it comes off as boring and awkward. Then people don't like me. I feel like I'm missing out on life big time.

Does anyone else feel like this a lot? I'm always dwelling on it. :blank


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## Iamme (Nov 1, 2010)

My expectations for my life at 17 never really happened either but i hope college will be much better than high school. A lot of times it is depressing to see everyone else having fun, dating, and having a lot of friends. Facebook is the worst, literally the worst invention ever because it is so depressing. Now I'm able to see what every else is doing 24/7. But I try not to go on facebook that much and i try to focus on the friends I do have and the things that SA isn't taking away from me.

I have the same problem with my mind going blank and not knowing what to say. I always have things to say to people I know but with people I want to get to know it's really hard. But I'm really trying to talk to people more now.


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## AlexSky (Jun 1, 2011)

We are in the exact same boat. 

Except nobody has complimented my appearance. It's harder when you're a guy because no one says "Nice hair" or "I like your smile" or "I like your shirt".

Just one more year left. One more year and hopefully everything will be all better.


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## CrazyChris (May 3, 2011)

Pretty much the same for me, too. I used to think i'm the weirdest loser on earth because of this. But since i know about SA it's gotten better. Because now I know, i'm not alone, and it's not my fault, that i am how i am.


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## josh23 (Nov 26, 2010)

You haven't missed any oppurtunities. You're 17. You're just living your life and journey with what you've been given. Work hard, overcome the struggles you have, and you can get the social life you want, and appreciate it much more than those who have always had it. The people who experience what you want have problems to do with the life they lead, you from the outside looking in can make sure you're smart about eveything when you get out there, and not make the mistakes that many do. Keep your head up, work hard, and everything will be fine on the other side, you'll be amazed by how far you've come, and you'll feel stupid for having had these thoughts.


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## Ricebunnyx3 (Sep 1, 2010)

I feel the same way. I'm a senior and never did anything. I have no social life whatsoever. You did more than me at least. I never went to any party. The only thing I've done was prom, which was last night. The only reason why I went was because so many adults were telling me that prom was the best night of there life, and that it was really fun. And adults that didn't go said that I'll regret it. Yeah, I went and I wasn't really missing out on anything and wouldn't have regretted anything. I went w/ my best friend and other than her, she was the only friend I had there. Then I had a very few number of acquaintances there, that I greeted and that's it. Well I danced with one, which was very awkward for me. My friend I was with kept trying to make me dance, but I can't dance, and I especially didn't want to dance in front of other people. Even though some people around me were dancing and couldn't dance either, and some were just dancing really crazy on purpose, I didn't have the confidence to let loose. And when I was dancing for a little bit, I keep stopping because it physically made me sad, and when I was dancing I was frowning. 
But out of all my four years, that's all I did. And it was so awkward and a waste of time and money.


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## Ricebunnyx3 (Sep 1, 2010)

josh23 said:


> You haven't missed any oppurtunities. You're 17. You're just living your life and journey with what you've been given. Work hard, overcome the struggles you have, and you can get the social life you want, and appreciate it much more than those who have always had it. The people who experience what you want have problems to do with the life they lead, you from the outside looking in can make sure you're smart about eveything when you get out there, and not make the mistakes that many do. Keep your head up, work hard, and everything will be fine on the other side, you'll be amazed by how far you've come, and you'll feel stupid for having had these thoughts.


Having a social life is not synonymous with not being smart and making bad choices. I know lots of very smart people in my school who are social and pretty popular too. One is the valedictorian, one is the salutatorian, and one is somewhere in the top 5. They're social and have a lot of friends and a social life and still make time for studying, hw, etc. Also, everyone makes mistakes regardless of how social you are.


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## josh23 (Nov 26, 2010)

Ricebunnyx3 said:


> Having a social life is not synonymous with not being smart and making bad choices. I know lots of very smart people in my school who are social and pretty popular too. One is the valedictorian, one is the salutatorian, and one is somewhere in the top 5. They're social and have a lot of friends and a social life and still make time for studying, hw, etc. Also, everyone makes mistakes regardless of how social you are.


My bad, I didn't mean to generalise. I meant that many do, I know that many don't and good for them.

Other than that generalisation, I stand by what I said.


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## Madstuh (Feb 14, 2009)

With you there. At least you have those 5 friends though. I have no one. :roll


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## thewrestler92 (May 22, 2011)

I had the same problems when I was a junior in high school. I really didn't have actual friends until like the last few months of junior year where I had like one or two friends. You might meet some people next year. I have a few people that I really didn't start hanging out with until a few months into my senior year of high school. Just keep working on it and your goals will eventually be achieved. I recommend from personal experience to work on socializing and making friends before going to college. Talk to a social worker or psychologist at your school if you have to. I made the mistake of going to college and thinking I would be able to change everything all of a sudden. I then realized, I didn't know how to make friends because my friends in high school took initiative to make friends with me. I spent most weekends my freshman year sitting in my room by myself. I then saw a counselor at my college and managed to make one friend at the end of this year. I'm just hoping I can start over next year as a sophomore making friends.


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## guitarmatt (Aug 13, 2009)

I am also a junior feeling just like you do, except i have no friends at all, which makes me even more pathetic. I am ashamed of even being in highschool, much less
being a senior that has no connection with my class.

My junior year is ending, ive missed out on any social life ive could have had in highschool. And now i have to be a senior when i dont even feel i belong.


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## thatguy95 (Feb 22, 2011)

I just let a beautiful girl that liked me (for some reason) go because I...........there is no real reason Im just a pu**y that cant even ask a girl that likes me out.


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## bunnyb (Dec 6, 2011)

You were exactly me in highschool, im 18 a freshman in college and I still find myself alone all the time, my roommate is lucky she has a boyfriends and bestfriends and stuff and I don't. The few friends I had in highschool have all gone so im alone. Exactly what you are going through I am going through the same thing, I have never had a boyfriend, guys act strange around me :'( some of my friends i feel don't want to talk to me or associate themselves with me, so they just stop talking to me. I dnt know what is wrong with me,i am a shy person but fun, spontaneous and goofy when you get to know me, but people don't want to get to know me or don't stick around.im very sad, just try to make the best of your last year in highschool, i wish i did.


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## Joe (May 18, 2010)

Too many, and my life has been getting worse and worse every year that passes by.


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## alittlebitanxious (Apr 20, 2011)

Everything will honestly get better-I promise. I was like you in high school, quiet and felt kind of "awkward" around a lot of people, and felt like I didn't really belong. Now I'm in college, and it is wayyyy better. One piece of advice I can give you is work really hard and go to a community college near your home. You can still go to school but don't have to deal with all of the annoying dorm stuff. And if you get good grades, you're likely to get scholarships too.

And as far of the boyfriend thing, don't rush it. It really doesn't matter. As a matter of fact, I didn't have my first BF until I was almost 17. It was around that same time that a lot of guys really started to like me. How did that happen? I took an entire summer to work out, buy really cute back to school clothes, and I really worked on my self confidence. The second you feel like you don't need a boyfriend, will be the time that it happens. And I honestly felt like I didn't need one at that point, and that is when I met the guy who I thought was so great, but ended up completely erasing any self confidence I had built up about myself that summer. (Long story short, he was verbally abusive) I know that isn't "getting better", but it taught me a lot, and I'm using it to show you that you don't need a guy to feel complete.

I know how hard life can be sometimes, sometimes it really, really sucks, but there are highs and there are lows. Work hard now to make your life better in the future. 

Hope I helped 

P.S.-about Facebook-delete it. I deleted mine. Facebook is just a tool used to make others feel bad about themselves.


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## Joe H (Jul 30, 2011)

I feel the same. When i think of something to say it is boring. I also feel that i have missed many oppitunities. I think when i get a job i will beable to make a new, and hopefully good first impression. Surely when we get a job we have something obvious in common with the people around you.


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## 2loveRye (Feb 26, 2012)

I feel the SAME way. Right now, my junior year of high school is halfway over and when I look back at the last 2 and a half years I just feel sad. I moved the summer before my Freshman year, and never really made any new friends because I was too scared/shy to talk to people. I did do Track and Band, but it's only now, after all this time, that I really have a group of "friends" to talk to in school. I still don't ever do things on the weekends. I spend more or less every weekend with my family. 

Before I graduate, I plan on trying my best to overcome some of my S.A. fears. I can't stand to be like this anymore.


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## Kanova (Dec 17, 2012)

I just want you guys to know, after High School, it DOES NOT get better. It can only get worse unless you change. College or Uni are the exact same. You have to change it yourself. I was the same, basically a lifeless husk. Maybe it would get better in college, I hear that is where all the good stuff happens! Maybe I will finally have my first relationship or something! Nope, nope, nope. Same ****. Not different at all, because I didn't act different. You have to change it yourself.

Basically, life doesn't suddenly get better once you are done school >.>


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## DysfunctionalDoll (Dec 14, 2012)

My high school experience sucked. I hated getting up in the morning knowing that I had to go through 7 hours of hell. I honestly, to this day, do not know what actually made me go through with it all. I was never bullied or picked on but it was just really hard being in a place full of social butterflies. I missed out on 5 homecomings, 3 prom invites, a few parties and so on. Looking back on it all of the "friends" I made weren't friends at all. I didn't meet time worthy people until my Senior year. So just keep in mind that it's never too late to make friends, and that opportunities aren't limited just in a place of education. 
Try to go out and do things you enjoy. There will be people there who share your interest(s) and it will make it easy to spark a conversation/friendship. 
People often say it gets better after High school. That all depends on you.


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

I'm a senior and High School has been nothing but a disappointment. It has been neither the worst of cliche-throwing-in-the-trash-can nor jocks-being-respected-and-getting-all-the-girls. 

It's just been me, floating around, bored by the teachers, friendless, uninspired. I've never had a bf/gf, had my first kiss, or even held hands with someone. Nothing. Nada. No high school romance for this girl.

I've never been involved in any of my school's clubs. Nor have I gone to a football game, dance, and now I'm even contemplating whether or not to bother going to prom. I mean, what's the point? I don't have anyone who would ask me out. Or any friends to go with. So why would I go to a cramped gym packed with people I loathe who I don't care if I'll ever see again while I go take trips between standing against the wall and drinking from the punchbowl.

I hope college is more exciting, and less suffocating and lonely.


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## W A N D E R L U S T (Oct 2, 2012)

I almost became popular in the first year of highschool, I had a popular guy crushing on me, all these popular girls were talking to me but the only problem was...I was so shy. Now I Wonder what my life would've been like if I didn't back away from the 'cool people'. but then again I do think my life is pretty good right now and the 'nerds' are so much funnier!


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