# Do you have a girlfriend?



## SADFighter (May 4, 2007)

"So how's school?"

"Good."

"Have a girlfriend--"

(cutting him off) "I started a nice internship."

"Nice."

(coming back later on)

"So you have a girlfriend?"

"Nope."

"Really, come on man!"

"What can I say?"

(Someone else called out and said I was a player) :lol 

"Do you at least have friends?"

"Yep."

End of conversation. The "triumph" here, though is that I wasn't bothered at all. A little anxious during the conversation but I wasn't ashamed of anything. This year I finally did have a girlfriend but it ended in the spring well before I went home. For a while when people asked, I would just say I used to but it's been too long for that now. I decided I would just be honest. I think it's just a thing friends and family ask to break the ice and get a snapshot of how you're doing. In the past I felt shame for several reasons: 1. I had never had a relationship and never thought I would (on some level). 2. I felt like I was being judged for never being with someone. 3. My lack of romance was indicative of other problems in my life. But now that I've had a relationship and corrected a lot of other things in my life--all of which this guy had no clue about--I felt free from his judgment. If he thinks I'm a loser...who cares? I just transcended the whole thing, which was nice.


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## Lisa (Jul 8, 2006)

:clap 

funny thing is that once you don't care if people think you are a loser they don't seem to think that you are anymore.


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## daaaaave (Jan 1, 2007)

who the heck asks "do you at least have friends?"


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## TheStig (Nov 24, 2007)

The same guy who, after asking you where you are living next year at university, asks "with friends, right?"


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## SADFighter (May 4, 2007)

daaaaave said:


> who the heck asks "do you at least have friends?"


Yeah, I know right?! Oh well. Like I said though, I don't really care. I do in fact have friends and I will have another girlfriend. :yes


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

Nobody ever asks me if I have/had a girlfriend for some bizarre reason. I think I'd just tell them that I don't and that I'm not looking either. This would be honest as well, and I'd have no problem saying that.

People need to learn that some people don't WANT to be in a romantic relationship.


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

daaaaave said:


> who the heck asks "do you at least have friends?"


Yeah, I thought the same thing.

If this guy was rude, I'd love to ask him what is so great about a girlfriend. I love trying to get people to rationally defend the taken-for-granted assumption that all people must be in relationships to function or be happy. I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life, and (GASP!) I've never had a girlfriend. :lol

The line of questioning would probably start out with...

1. Do you think ALL people require a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy with their lives?

2. If so, how do you account for people who say otherwise? Do you have any evidence that ALL these people are liars?

3. If not, then what is your problem with my answer?


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

"do you have a girlfriend?"

"nope but i do have a boyfriend "

*silence*


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