# Mindfulness meditation completely changed my life



## freshjive

I've had some shape or form of social anxiety as long as I can remember and it was getting stronger as I got older. For the last few years I was a total shut it and only left the house when I was dragged out or I absolutely needed to do something. Needless to say on top of my social anxiety I felt really depressed too.

About 6 months ago I was feeling particularly bad and googled "How can I stop hating myself". The results brought up something called mindfulness. I didn't know what it was but I was going to give it a try. That led me to a book called "Mindfulness in plain English". Immediately after reading the first chapter I knew this book was for me. Everything that was said in the book resonated with me.

After reading that book I haven't looked back. I've been practicing mindfulness meditation for at least 20 minutes a day for the last 6 months and haven't felt better. I still get nervous/anxious sometimes but I know how to control it and it doesn't take complete control over myself.

I feel so much more relaxed and at ease with myself. I genuinely thought that depression and anxiety were going to be with me for the rest of my life. Now that I've started meditating I feel soooooo much better.

:teeth


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## Farstucker

That's interesting. I've thought about trying meditation to help with my social anxiety. I've thought about it before but I keep putting it off because it's difficult and it's easier to just drink or do drugs. I'm glad you posted this, I think I'll give it a serious shot.


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## Zeeshan

how do you meditate ive been doing it daily with a candle, staring at it, focusing on it. its shown improvements but i am still far from where i ultimately want to be


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## fredbloggs02

I have resumed mindfulness meditation of late. I had been practicing it consistently, without missing a day, for over a year, until my meditation cd broke. I think its effects are cumulative. The peace of mind and inner stillness is worth the time in itself, but the concentration I derived from it was significant. It certainly reduced anxiety I felt within myself that was unprovoked by outside experience.

Not sure it effected my anxiety in provoking situations; it may perhaps have reduced it.


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## fredbloggs02

Zeeshan said:


> how do you meditate ive been doing it daily with a candle, staring at it, focusing on it. its shown improvements but i am still far from where i ultimately want to be


I sit with my right foot over my left leg in a position called half lotus.

Attend to sounds distant and near 3 min.

Attend to in-breath (four or five), then to out-breath (four or five), then to the gaps between inhalation and exhalation (four or five). And, lastly, attend to inhalation, exhalation and the space between the breath, all joined together for 8 mins.

Attend to body for 5 mins.

Attend to thoughts for 3 mins.

Attend to breath and finish or remain for longer.

It is not attempting to control or alter the focus of meditation, but merely attending to it. The attention is not judgmental or censorious when the mind loses concentration, as it often does when one first begins. It is merely observing, being open to whatever arises, and gently guiding open attention back to the present focus of meditation. This is the regime I follow.

I light candles to observe and burn incense, if I have any.


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## Zeeshan

Okay so here what I have been doing

I light a candle twice a day for 15 min

I sit and stare at it. I try to focus on it. Usually mind drifts and I bring it back to the candle. First month or so I would get frustrated now I dont get lost in thoughts as Much

Improvement has not been as large as I thought it would be but ive noticed two significant changes

1) I have more awareness of thoughts and I have less overal mind wandering. I am focusing more on my goals. One thing I noticed is that even when drunk I was more in control

2) impact of emotions is reduced. Not sure how this works but negative emotions dont seem as powerful especially fear and shame. When I feel them they dont feel as much. 

The change is significant enough and not a placebo. People have mentioned to me I look calmer. I also am more focused


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## Mirizzle

Good to hear you have your anxiety more under control!  
Meditation seems to help with all sorts of mental ailments so keep it up!


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## Wildman

Interesting. I believe mindfulness meditation applied to treating social anxiety is in fact currently being studied (Stanford). Glad to hear it worked so well for you.


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## diamondheart89

Meditation helps me focus and feel less anxious too. The mind is a powerful thing, especially when you learn how to harness it systematically.


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## inerameia

I want to try it out but I always put it off. I'll try it tomorrow.


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## Slogger

It's a good practice to do almost anytime, while walking, standing in a line, driving. Even during social interactions. I try to stay focused on my tanden (area just below the navel) and on doing long, slow exhalations. I find that the more I can return to this instead of engaging in unnecessary, inappropriate thoughts, the better.


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## DubnRun

That's good, meditation helps me too. However I haven't done it much or for a long time now.


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## The Starry night

This is what I've been doing recently and it does help a lot but I need more practise at it and hopefully it will become a skill I can use when I get self conscious.


I Borrowed the Mindfulness by Mark Williams and Danny Penman from the library and it is good. It help you be aware and focus on your surroundings instead of focusing on you negative thoughts and being afraid.


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