# How long have you felt alone for?



## kamq (Mar 19, 2012)

For me, its been seven years and counting. I had a lot of friends before that but when I moved things were never the same. Some how, I feel like if I had been alone my whole life it would be easier. Its hard to experience the joy of something and have it abruptly taken away. I'm not really sure if most people are having that much fun anyways, maybe my view of other peoples' life is skewed.


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## LucasChase (Dec 23, 2013)

kamq said:


> For me, its been seven years and counting. I had a lot of friends before that but when I moved things were never the same. Some how, I feel like if I had been alone my whole life it would be easier. Its hard to experience the joy of something and have it abruptly taken away. I'm not really sure if most people are having that much fun anyways, maybe my view of other peoples' life is skewed.


Its been about 10 years since I have had any proper friends, I guess that I have spent so much time by myself over the years that I would now find it strange to have people who wanted to hang out with me even though i consider myself to be a nice enjoyable person to be around, and I get what your saying about people having fun I always wonder if they are actually enjoying themselves or just doing it because it's what everyone is meant to do to be considered normal!


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## safetytx (Dec 23, 2013)

Forever lol


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## Logston (Nov 27, 2013)

Three years on April 1st.


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## freakamidget (Nov 25, 2013)

Kind of like my whole life I guess.


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## christacat (Aug 6, 2010)

on and off since I was 11.


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## Lacking Serotonin (Nov 18, 2012)

I specifically remember in 3rd grade.


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## Despot (Sep 12, 2013)

7 years.. after parent divorse and went to another place everything changed.. I wish i never changed places.


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## Green Eyes (Sep 6, 2009)

As long as I can remember.


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## Zashlin (Dec 15, 2013)

5 years after I moved and switched schools


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## Morumot (Sep 21, 2011)

Never had a time that I didn't feel alone. I don't think that will change.


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## Kalliber (Aug 18, 2012)

Most of my life


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## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

I honestly can't remember _not_ feeling alone. Even when I was surrounded by friends/boyfriends who genuinely cared about me. It has nothing to do with being physically alone, for me(although it can make it worse).


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## ChrisSAS (Dec 7, 2013)

It would have been about 2001/2002 when it really hit me bad. It was when my group of mates went overseas to Canada for a couple of years...it just got worse and worse from there


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## sanspants08 (Oct 21, 2008)

I felt alone from preschool onward. Not all the time, but at least once a day (as an only child). There were some years in college when I actually didn't feel alone daily. And in some relationships, things were sometimes good. I lived with a housemate on and off for eight years, even though we both could have lived separately, because life just felt better with some sort of companionship.


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## Sunhawk (Oct 3, 2013)

For about 2 years. I last saw my only friend in april 2010. Then it took me a while to feel lonely and realize that I didnt have any friends left.

I have anxiety at this very moment just thinking about my life situation as it is now. I need to do something and fast. It's not terrible, but my social life is totally dead and that's what's bothering me the most.


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## SomethingClever1 (Dec 26, 2013)

Since I was 14 so 12 years now.


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## anyoldkindofday (Dec 16, 2012)

Since I've been 17 I guess, before then hopelessly crushing on girls was enough to keep me happy, and being sick a lot I had plenty of excuses why I was alone, which made it okay for me. 

It's getting harder for me to believe it'll get better, even though I know it will, I always thought I'd have met someone by now, just afraid that by the time I find someone it'll be too late and my optimism is already gone...

Oh I'm making it sound like it's all about a relationship, but a best friend would also suffice, but so far it's never been mutual. I'd always be #20 to them when they were my #1, or they were my #20 when I was in their top 5 (if it's even possible to rank friends)


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## h00dz (Dec 25, 2012)

5-6 years of basically having no one, can really get to a person.


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## bubblyboy (Dec 26, 2013)

I've had a good circle of friends during high school but right when college hit, for me, that's when I actually started feeling detached with people who I used to know and thus feeling very lonely. I've made a few friends in college that actually stick but I've also have lost touch with the majority of my high school friends. Although that kind of a thing is normal, whenever I see them from time to time I really have nothing new to present to them except on how my studies have gone. No girlfriend, nothing big and awesome, just a boring college schlub trying to get through school to get the **** out of this ****hole town.


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## kamq (Mar 19, 2012)

bubblyboy said:


> I've had a good circle of friends during high school but right when college hit, for me, that's when I actually started feeling detached with people who I used to know and thus feeling very lonely. I've made a few friends in college that actually stick but I've also have lost touch with the majority of my high school friends. Although that kind of a thing is normal, whenever I see them from time to time I really have nothing new to present to them except on how my studies have gone. No girlfriend, nothing big and awesome, just a boring college schlub trying to get through school to get the **** out of this ****hole town.


Yeah man, that's pretty much exactly how it is for me as well. I keep thinking if I move to a more lively part of the city I might not be so lonely.


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## slider (Feb 9, 2013)

I grew up on a farm not near anyone. It was just me and my family who worked leaving me alone during the days of the week and we could visit on sunday. At the age of 5-6 i ate food from the fridge / while 7-12 i learned how to cook. At school we would recieve a packet of work and we would sit at our desk for the exception of break time where we were sent outside. We would come back inside and finish the packet and walk home.

There was no outside contact at home with anyone and at school grades 1-8 were from self study packets.

I have been alone since the age of five.


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## jamesjameson (Dec 30, 2013)

a long long time dont think people who dont have this problem will ever truley know how it feels.
my only plus is that this forums exsists im not alone and there is a chance for a better life, even if its a small one.


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## lithocardium (Dec 23, 2013)

Since I was 16 I think. So, 13 years. Before that it was more on and off loneliness. Lost most of my friends from middle school and high school since I had to retake a year after failing.


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## ChuckBrown (Jul 2, 2013)

I think it was after the first girl I liked rejected me. I was 10.


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## lostinlife (Jun 2, 2010)

Since I was born. I just don't connect with people. I'm an introvert, but even introverts can get lonely.


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## chessman6500 (Sep 5, 2013)

Since I was 6 or 7. Its been over a decade.


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## FunkyFedoras (Aug 30, 2013)

4 going on 5 years.


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## GrainneR (Feb 7, 2014)

I've been sort of a loner my whole life, but it's gotten pretty bad the last couple of years. I went from a handful of friends to now having no friends. There are days when I can count the number of words I've spoken on my fingers.
It's not so bad, except when I hear people having loads of fun hanging out (I'm at university), and that's when I feel distinctly lonely.


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## Bizarre (Jan 21, 2014)

kamq said:


> For me, its been seven years and counting. I had a lot of friends before that but when I moved things were never the same. Some how, I feel like if I had been alone my whole life it would be easier. Its hard to experience the joy of something and have it abruptly taken away. I'm not really sure if most people are having that much fun anyways, maybe my view of other peoples' life is skewed.


This is for me too. About five years ago. The summer after high school. Slowly but surely...everything started changing. I had lots of real friends. Then I just spoke to them here & there, then they turned into Facebook friends...then I realized wow I have no friends. In fact when I got the strength to go live on campus I was at the end of semester going to take a final and I was digging in my pocket. When I glanced up there was my best friend since 8th grade and she was digging in her book bag. And for a moment I was happy and then I remembered we weren't friends anymore and I silently walked passed her. I hadn't even know we were going to the same school...which we'd always planned on doing. But this wasn't the school we'd planned. Creepy.

But I sure wished I hadn't known her at all because apparently what was the point of that friendship or any friendship?


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Ever since I was able to conceptualize the thought of being alone.


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## JakeBoston1000 (Apr 8, 2008)

first grade when my fat,bloated pig of a teacher abused the **** out of me.That's exactly when.Glad she's dead now ****ing wh ore.


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## scilentor (Feb 8, 2014)

For too long since being a child. Can say that I've had only 3 'good' friends during my time with SAO and ofcourse the people I know from my class whom I talk to but have nothing incommon and I regard them more as people who I know. As for my current situation, one of those friends I've known for 10+ years has moved away. The other 2 are aware of my SAO now as I've told them a couple of years ago, but I still see them only about once in a month or less.
I've enlisted myself to a couple of sites and instead of trying to even get dates at the moment I've focused on trying to make friends through them. There are surprisingly people who open up to you if you do the same and are willing to help. I'm 21, I know it's not that much, but I've been with SAO with almost (let me count.. 1999... ->... ) 15 years so making friends has never been easy for me. Romances have been out of question and the only times I've even managed to get even a pair of friends in my life has been at school where I've been 'forced' to come every day and see them. 
With a little effort and by opening to strangers (I know it's not easy, but online it's still way easier) can help you quite a bit to 1) improve yourself 2) get tips 3) possibly make new friends. I'm going down this path. Also got a time for a psychiatrist this morning which I've been postponing for almost a year. What an *** I've been...


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## BassHead (Feb 8, 2014)

5 years. All my friends had moved away and I didn't make any others until this past year (and even then they are all online friends...not quite the same). It really didn't bother me until my life started going down the drain, when depression hit and my SA became apparent. Been feeling alone ever since.


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## WhatBITW (Jan 26, 2013)

On and off my whole life. More so in the last few years though.


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## ASB20 (Jun 5, 2013)

Going on nine years now. May of '05 is when the catalyst struck, and it hasn't let up since.


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

My entire life. It became apparent I was 'different' by the time I entered preschool. While I did have my family who loved and babied me as a child at home, I didn't have any friends at school. A few classmates who might talk to me sometimes. I stayed alone most of the time. Recess especially confused me. I didn't like directing my own physical activity so I usually just walked around and collected rocks, or sat on the swings. Middle school is when the bullying/teasing/ostracism became prominent. High school, I became invisible, occasionally noticed (in a negative light, usually). College I became the depressive hermit. 1st semester was especially hard after my roommate dropped out and I stayed alone in a room most of the day except to attend one or two classes per day. I don't even want to think of all those lonely nights, extreme insomnia, lack of motivation to get up and do anything, skipping classes, skipping meals, staying inside all day, those terrible thoughts, what I tried to do to myself in the early morning hours just to get myself through the night alone. They seem like a different person, but at the same time not. I could easily slip back that far again if I'm not careful.


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## Steinerz (Jul 15, 2013)

Since forever


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## Mr snooze (Feb 11, 2014)

Can count my friends with 1 hand , and they are too faraway and busy for me to reach


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## flykiwi (Jul 18, 2011)

i guess my issue stems from shame because when i was 8 i remember
thinking i hate how im such a loner and a loser even though i had a friend or two.. but i always hated myself since i was 8.. ive only had 4 friends my whole life and now theyre gone
on different ways.. my dad was abusive though so i think this had a lot to do with the shame.
i dont remember much of it and im good with that.


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## FrittataOblongata (Feb 20, 2014)

Since I was 5 or 6 when my dad taught me embarrassment and no one helped me to deal with it. It's not as bad after I got married and have some friends at work, but life is mostly _not_ intimate moments.


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## eternalmind (Feb 24, 2014)

I've always been the quiet one, I don't understand how people are constantly in touch with other people, going to parties/lunch/hanging out. I like (or am more comfortable) in my own company.


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## hermito (Jan 29, 2014)

Approximately 6 years. The older I get the loner I become.


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## XxVampireLov3rXx (Sep 8, 2013)

yes! I have always felt lonely, especially during high school and up until now, used to have *best friends* but they went their seperate ways, also got rejected as well, feel so alone, invisible, like I don't belong in this world! and no one understands me.


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## 6 million ways to live (Feb 25, 2014)

For about two years.. but hey, at lest you had friends. You could be surrounded by people and still feel lonely, alone, isolated.


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## perennial wallflower (Feb 17, 2014)

I've always had few friends. Popularity isn't something I've ever experienced.



Mr snooze said:


> Can count my friends with 1 hand , and they are too faraway and busy for me to reach


Often the issue with me, too.


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## Ineko (Jan 5, 2014)

since moving to texas, going on 4yrs


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## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

going on 16 years, honestly i've got used to it, i don't know if i could handle it any other way now, cause i push away people that try to get close


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## Grog (Sep 13, 2013)

Years and years ago I used to feel alone ( and was ) but now I don't feel alone at all used to it ( still am alone ) I feel worse when people are around and even in sight I crave total isolation and find it comforting there are still some places that are totally unpopulated .


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## Tickerberger (Feb 12, 2014)

Like a lot of other people here: pretty much my entire life. I never had any real friends growing up. Just what I would call "forced acquaintances", people you see often and are somewhat forced to see often (family members, schoolmates, workmates etc.) but don't have any real emotional connection to.

I'll tell you though, I didn't feel completely alone until my dog died when I was 12. Never been the same since. I've never been very close with anyone.


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## CNikki (Aug 9, 2013)

I wouldn't say it's fun being 'alone' all your life. I can't say I have but deep down I felt there was something that I felt so alone with and nobody was able to fully grasp this and make me feel not as alone, if that makes sense. It sucks. I cannot stand interacting but at the same time it kills me when I lack it, and to think there was a period of time where I felt it was best for me to be alone. It lead me nowhere and still is leading me nowhere.


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## camilo borja (Feb 26, 2014)

ever since high school.8 years


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## camilo borja (Feb 26, 2014)

CNikki said:


> I wouldn't say it's fun being 'alone' all your life. I can't say I have but deep down I felt there was something that I felt so alone with and nobody was able to fully grasp this and make me feel not as alone, if that makes sense. It sucks. I cannot stand interacting but at the same time it kills me when I lack it, and to think there was a period of time where I felt it was best for me to be alone. It lead me nowhere and still is leading me nowhere.


i can relate to this. i want to be alone and at the same time i don't want to be alone. why does life have to be complicated all the time?


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## seadevil (Mar 3, 2014)

For whole my life. At first I was quite OK with my imaginary world, but you can't sustain it when you are not a child anymore.


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