# ever feel like you are invisible?



## itsjustme24 (Jan 2, 2007)

I do a lot. For example, if someone is ever talking to me and another person, they will always give the other person way more eye contact & hardly look at me at all. I don't know why. I am giving them eye contact & trying to appear interested. And I often feel like people don't even hear what I say. I have to wait until everyone is completely quiet for them to recognize I'm even commenting (but it's not that I'm speaking too quietly, it's just no one is paying attention to me). It hurts my feelings because I am trying to be social, but for some reason, I am just invisible.


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## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

Same exact thing happens to me, in EVERY social situation. If somebody I'm with is talking to someone else, I might as well just walk away because they'd never notice anyway.


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## beatlegeuce (Jun 28, 2007)

Yep, last year i was late for my first period class because i couldnt get my locker open and the woman in the office wouldnt give me a late pass, so i was a little worried. I walked into my first period class probably 10mins late and the teacher nor anyone else said a word about it, i never felt more invisable then i did then even though i got away with it.


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## katelyn (Jul 11, 2006)

Yes, this happens to me too. I always feel hurt by it. I notice how whenever I'm with someone else and someone speaks to us, they always look most at the other person and very rarely glance at me. It doesn't work to force myself to speak, either - they still appear determined to act as if I'm not there.


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## Nutnutnut (Jun 2, 2007)

I know that very well. I've stopped being hurt by it though. I'm not flashy enough for them. In all cases, I don't need anything from them, small talk is not what I'm interested in. And until they can manage to handle mature conversations and debates, or until I find people who are alike, that I connect with, those moments are insignificant. Most people talk about stupidity all the time too, that's not the people I'm looking for, and what they think is unimportant, because themselves are unimportant until the day they decide to grow up, and become someone more than stupid fools.


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## goofball (Aug 20, 2007)

That's what I run into when I go out to lunch with the folks I work with. I also get interrupted fairly often when I try to speak...which drives me up the f'in wall. They rag on me for being anti-social and this is what I run into when I try to be social


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## Andrew White (Aug 18, 2007)

I feel it and might as well be invisible in most social situations as I have nothing to contribute to any normal discussion. I imagine it is to do with body language, people pick up our reluctance to say anything and just phase us out. It's a horrible feeling and I think it is nothing more than rudness but there you go.


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## Cyclone (Aug 19, 2005)

Ugh I just had a nice, long reply typed out, but for some reason hitting "backspace" took me the previous page, losing everything. :mum 

Quick recap: Yes, this is EXACTLY how I feel. The OP took the words right out of my mouth. Whenever Someone is talking to me and another person, I become invisible. The person will be so personable and give the other person with me full eye contact, yet I get a half-second sympathy glance every 2 minutes, which is even more hurtful, as they know I'm there.

These scenarios always make me feel ugly, awkward, and stupid, and I'm none of those qualities. I'll fight for attenion, giving the person talking my full attention, smiling, and trying my hardest to comment and react. Sadly, my comments are never registered by anyone, and I feel worthless as a person. 

I guess it has been said. People can easily detect nervousness or shyness in others, and they must immediately default to the person that has the best social skills. I'm not sure how we can get people's attention back when our confidence is continually reduced because of these scenarios...


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## Aron James (Jun 16, 2007)

You are invisible! as is everyone, never forget this!

No one EVER sees YOU, ever!!!!!

All people see is a miniscule fraction of you. What they believe to be you is a perception coming from their own side, projected within their own mind. You know yourself very differently to how others know you.

People pick up very subtly on how you are tho and so it's almost intimidating for them, although it never seems so. This has happened to me and still does. So they cannot feel comfortable looking at me because it's like i'm trying too hard to be all sociable for people to like me. What happens is that every little thing then confirms to me that they do not like me, like not looking at me, not speaking to me all because of a need INSIDE me, what's that need 'The need to loved/liked'. Because this need is within me, i do not need to seek others for this feeling to arise, i need to fully accept myself and say, it's ok if no one likes me, i can still be happy without needing to be liked by everyone i meet.....then this no one looks at me thing goes away.

Aron


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## tobeyourselfisnotacrime (Jun 10, 2007)

Sometimes I feel invisible. Sometimes I feel too visible.


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## Andrew White (Aug 18, 2007)

There is a contradiction for me, I want to be invisible and try not to stand out, but when it works and someone ignores me I feel offended. It's the dichotomy of social anxiety I suppose. I don't like social situations but I am still human and humans are social.


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## cookie (Jan 1, 2006)

This is the reason I don't speak in group settings anymore, every time I spoke I was pretty much ignored, so now I just blend into the background and just listen. :lurk


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## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

It would have been funny if no one had replied or viewed this thread.

I've always felt invisible. People often act and talk as if I'm not right there in front of them. It's weird.

For instance, there's this one time I'll never forget. I was working at a summer job a few years ago and I was alone in that part of the building. A couple coworkers came in from lunch break and they were talking. I forget what the specifics were, but the conversation led one of them to say, "Well, we're alone now." I was standing RIGHT THERE. They were literally a few feet from me, in plain sight. It's ****ed up.


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## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

tobeyourselfisnotacrime said:


> Sometimes I feel invisible. Sometimes I feel too visible.


 :ditto


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## VCL XI (Jan 19, 2004)

I might be. People try to walk right through me instead of around me all the time.


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## Andrew White (Aug 18, 2007)

VCL XI said:


> I might be. People try to walk right through me instead of around me all the time.


That would be funny if you discovered you are actually invisible.


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## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

VCL XI said:


> I might be. People try to walk right through me instead of around me all the time.


That actually happens to me too. It seems to especially happen when I'm driving. Other drivers often act as if I'm not there. It's amazing how many accidents I've *almost* been in, and only avoided due to my catlike reflexes.


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## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

justlistening said:


> What you described happens all the time to me, that's why I prefer one-to-one conversations.


 :ditto


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## jem77 (Jul 14, 2007)

i think i literally am invisable! whenever i try and walk through those automatic doors in supermarkets that use sensors to open, it doesnt work and its really embarrassing


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## Moonlite7189 (Aug 26, 2007)

yup, in group conversations I'm ignored because I'm too quiet so I guess they kinda just forget that I'm there :boogie lol.


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## Andrew White (Aug 18, 2007)

jem77 said:


> i think i literally am invisable! whenever i try and walk through those automatic doors in supermarkets that use sensors to open, it doesnt work and its really embarrassing


Ha,ha! That happened to me last week, I even waved my hand around like a fool attempting to activate the censor. I decided to force my way through.


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## goofball (Aug 20, 2007)

> i think i literally am invisable! whenever i try and walk through those automatic doors in supermarkets that use sensors to open, it doesnt work and its really embarrassing


[/quote]
It also sucks when ya continue walking expecting it to open and walk right into it :afr


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## Andrew White (Aug 18, 2007)

goofball said:


> > i think i literally am invisable! whenever i try and walk through those automatic doors in supermarkets that use sensors to open, it doesnt work and its really embarrassing


It also sucks when ya continue walking expecting it to open and walk right into it :afr[/quote]

Never expect an automatic door to open! Valuable life lesson.


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## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

Zephyr said:


> VCL XI said:
> 
> 
> > I might be. People try to walk right through me instead of around me all the time.
> ...


Same for me...people come close to running right into me so many times...I have been bumped into alot, I've been stepped on alot, and some woman even banged my head with her stupid purse once when I was sitting down in a crowded area. :mum


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## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

jem77 said:


> i think i literally am invisable! whenever i try and walk through those automatic doors in supermarkets that use sensors to open, it doesnt work and its really embarrassing


What I hate is when I push a door when I'm supposed to pull, or pull when I'm supposed to push :blush


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## Andrew White (Aug 18, 2007)

Little Miss Scare-All said:


> Same for me...people come close to running right into me so many times...I have been bumped into alot, I've been stepped on alot, and some woman even banged my head with her stupid purse once when I was sitting down in a crowded area. :mum


On a side note, I once accidentally (of course) really smashed some guy in the back of the head with my rucksack while getting off the bus.  It's awful I know, but I still find it hilarious. I couldn't even bring myself to say sorry as I was in a rush and felt so embarrassed/worried for my life I fled.

It's only funny when it happens to someone else.


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## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

Andrew White said:


> On a side note, I once accidentally (of course) really smashed some guy in the back of the head with my rucksack while getting off the bus.  It's awful I know, but I still find it hilarious. I couldn't even bring myself to say sorry as I was in a rush and felt so embarrassed/worried for my life I fled.
> 
> It's only funny when it happens to someone else.


 :lol One of my exes hit some kid in the head with a bag in the mall once. He was hurrying away before the kid went crying to its mom :b


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## rkim (Feb 27, 2012)

*Everyday*

I've been invisible most of my life mainly due to shy incompetent personality.
At work I'm ignored shunned . People would come to talk to coworkers around me. They never come to me as if I don't exist. I can actually show up in the morning, say hi to few people and disappear and no one would notice.
Again when I was walking towards my car, I wished for short life. So miserable life...


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## Fawna Phantomhive (Jul 14, 2014)

I usually feel that way at school. I'm the smallest of my "friends" so I get pushed around a lot and ignored like I don't even exist. I've always spoke loud (my entire life actually) but one day they just stopped listening and acknowledging my existence. I'd get knocked over and hurt by random people walking in my direction almost every time like they didn't see me right in front of their face. What also sucks is when you want to speak but nobody is listening. That can get annoying. Especially when you reeeaaaally want to say something.


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## fattychan (Apr 16, 2013)

yeah, for like the first 20 years of my life. it wasn't until recently that i became noticeable. though, becoming more noticeable has led to some unfortunate events that made me wish i had stayed invisible. i think what's important is finding a balance between the two or being able to switch it on and off--like, knowing how to get around without being noticed and knowing how to attract desirable attention when the time is right.


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## Fireproof (Jul 13, 2014)

I do, as other people have said I think it comes with being a quiet, socially anxious person. It's such a typical teenage angst sort of song but 'Invisible' by Skylar Grey is a song I really identify with.

Lol, the other week I left the house for the first time in a month after struggling to do so due to anxiety. I was on the train and the ticket inspector came around the carriage and checked everybody else's ticket but just strolled past me without even noticing me. I actually questioned for a moment whether I had become invisible during my absence from the outside world.


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## Steven1105uk (Jul 13, 2014)

I get this a lot too. Ive met people three and four times and never forget there name or face but yet they introduce themselves to me and then i don't know whether to say excuse me but we have met a few times before and make the situation worse. Does make you feel like crap and theres no point in you existing


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## senthamizh (Jul 13, 2014)

me too when I speak to them they just ignore me and they'll like 'I didn't hear you'. I feel like im invisible all the time. I don't know what to do


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## keira90 (Jul 31, 2014)

*Invisible*

I've had alot of incidents where I was the one who wasn't being looked at.
Prior to graduating high school, I've always slid by.
Old relatives would forget my name.
Coworkers would speak as if i wasn't there, it's really irritating.
Once i DO get noticed it's for a negative reason.
Per say, in class if I had a stupid question, all the (negative) attention would be on me.

Since I am in college now, it's surprising to me that my desire of a college major matters. I've always had this mindset to conform to everyone else around me. Like I was born to ****ing serve? I don't know, this is how I was raised and brought up. I have no control over it. Basically, life what life was for eighteen years was that If I didn't conform properly, I would be looked at negatively.
*Since I was invisible to other people, I became invisible to myself*.
I developed an eating disorder called BED and basically it's eating large amounts of food in a short amount of time. I wouldn't get into detail on that topic but yeah.

I'm not saying in conforming as in social norms. Conforming as in not voicing my own opinions. Not being an individual.
*I don't know, all I know is that I've been living for eighteen years the wrong way.*


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## lockS (Sep 15, 2011)

This happens to me all the time. Someone is having a convo with me and this other person, and I totally don't get any eye contact AT ALL. Like, hello, I'm here too! And than if they ask me something and I didn't pay attention, I get comments like: You don't listen. Well duh, you were totally ignoring me...


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## Harmeulius (Jun 24, 2013)

Yes I do, I get ignored in group conversations. When I'm talking and someone else stars talking (before I'm talked out) my conversation partner will skip to the other person.

But the thing that bothers me the most is when I go to a bar with friends. A friend of mine is considered very attractive and I really feel like the invisible out there. Whenever he enters a lot of girls notice him. (including the ones I find attractive). It feels like I can enter the same room 27 times and perform the macarena whille standing on my head and still they won't notice me.


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## laysiaj (Jun 28, 2014)

Outside of my professional life, all the time. Although sometimes I wonder if that has more to do with my own mind wandering than the actuality of being ignored. I walk around like I'm in a dream state sometimes.


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## Andras96 (Mar 28, 2014)

I am. Except for when someone wants to treat me like s***.


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## mike285 (Aug 21, 2010)

Sometimes it's nothing personal. Some people just end up giving someone else more eye contact than you. But it could also be because maybe you're less responsive? I know that if I'm talking to two people, I'll likely focus more on the one who is more responsive/engaged or that I'm more interested in.


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## NicholasLG (Jul 26, 2014)

Yes, it's a little frustrating, especially when you're trying to say something.


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## Just Here (Jul 16, 2013)

I guess I'm a little different I don't want anyone to notice me in the first place. I just don't like to draw attention to myself. This includes cars and clothes, won't buy anything that makes people look.


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## Akuba (Oct 17, 2014)

Yes! Many times. No matter how hard I try to be social, it seems many people don't want to associate with me in any way. It's disheartening. Out of all people, WHY ME?!? What have I ever done!? I know life isn't supposed to be fair, but for me it's extremely unfair.

I'd love to meet people who are understanding of my social anxiety and Asperger's. These are no jokes. Suicides and school shootings were often done by sufferers of the aforementioned.


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## Blue Sponge (Sep 22, 2014)

I used to think that way. I used to have certain days where I feel like I was being ignored by everyone around me. Whenever I talked people would act like they didn't hear me or dismiss me. I haven't felt that way for a while (maybe for a year-ish). I somehow stopped paying attention to whether other people were paying attention to me or not. If people ignore me I just take it as an innocent mistake. So I've noticed less that people are ignoring me... either because people are really ignoring me less or because I'm not looking for it. I like to think that me feeling less uncomfortable translates to better body language so that people feel more comfortable around me. Anyway, whether it's true or not, it's a positive thought.


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## LolaViola (Jun 23, 2013)

Yeah, but I don't really like getting attention so usually I don't mind.


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## Meha (Feb 19, 2016)

The same thing happens to me- even if I do something nice for someone that no one else is willing to do, they take it for granted and don't seem to appreciate it and seem to always want something better...someone better. I honestly don't understand this and i never seem to know what to do


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## theman1234 (Jun 22, 2016)

what is the solution?


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## bluehog9 (Nov 25, 2015)

Yes, quite often. Additionally, my words are often apparently inaudible as well! For instance, in conversation people (even those who say they love me, appreciate me, I'm important, deserve respect, etc.) will cut me right off while I'm talking. Is this not pure rudeness? Beyond this, others in the conversation won't bother to even correct those who do it (e.g. "He was talking first, you know."). Why?


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## theman1234 (Jun 22, 2016)

*solution*

can anyone tell solution to this problom?


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## Leonardo Mattei (Feb 12, 2017)

I'm feeling it from two days ago. It's terrible, it's like i don't exist for anyone except my parents. It's the first time that i feel it so intensily, it's just the worst.


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## theman1234 (Jun 22, 2016)

this happens to me also from more than a year:nerd:.......somebody help !


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## theman1234 (Jun 22, 2016)

do any of you feel you are less attractive to opposite gender because of this?


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## Peaceislove (Nov 3, 2015)

itsjustme24 said:


> I do a lot. For example, if someone is ever talking to me and another person, they will always give the other person way more eye contact & hardly look at me at all. I don't know why. I am giving them eye contact & trying to appear interested. And I often feel like people don't even hear what I say. I have to wait until everyone is completely quiet for them to recognize I'm even commenting (but it's not that I'm speaking too quietly, it's just no one is paying attention to me). It hurts my feelings because I am trying to be social, but for some reason, I am just invisible.


yes.


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## Virgo (Jun 27, 2016)

Wow I was in either 6th or 7th grade when this thread was created. Okay, yes, I do experience that sometimes. Not nearly as much as I used to. It was ridiculous. I mean what used to bother me the most... when I would be speaking to someone, and then someone else completely interrupts and talks to that person with something unrelated, and the person I was talking to completely ditches me and talks to them. That was infuriating. That happened very often. To the person interrupting, do you have NO consciousness of your social setting whatsoever? Do you not realize two people are talking? And to the person who ditches the conversation, I have no words lol.

I have no idea whatsoever what changed, it could be I am projecting more confidence now than I used to? But it still happens to me on occasion. The reason I even NOTICE is because it is so unusual for me anymore. Just the other day I was talking to two people. There was also a video playing on a projector. I was IN this conversation. The two other people were talking and looking at each other the whole way through. When I started to speak, neither of them listened, and watched the video instead??? Like I was talking to myself. Despite looking at them both, they wouldn't look at me, which was really weird of them. Maybe both of them assumed at least one of them was looking at me so they thought they could watch the video. I thought that was very unusual.

The fact is, when people do stuff like that, you have to realize it IS 100% complete social retardation on their part. Really -- it's not you, it's them, who are socializing improperly, it is objectively a social flaw to do that. Somebody who has mastered socializing would not do these things. But see unfortunately nobody else recognizes it, or cares, unless it's the person that it's happening to. So yeah. A common social failure of others that doesn't get detected.


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## littleghost (Oct 29, 2016)

I usually try my best to go unnoticed. That's why my user name is ghost.


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## dreamer97 (Jan 10, 2017)

Yeah I feel like that all the time on a daily basis. When I'm not speaking no one notices me. When I do decide to try and engage in the conversation it's as if I'm only talking to myself and everyone continues as if I said nothing...


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

I've had people look right through me as though I'm not even there physically. It happened a few months ago, standing right in front of her. Eventually she acknowledged me, looking completly unphased.


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