# Everyone can get laid cant they??



## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

My 'normal' frineds have stated that it is impossible for anyone to not be able to get laid or start a relationship (even if they have SA) - such people cannot exist. They wont tell me their exact argument - I'm supposed to know for some reason. All they say is "You're strange that you dont want to do it" - like it is a choice. Do any of you know what they are talking about - why it is impossible for someone like me to exist?


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

iIts not impossible I am 22 and in the same boat.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Oh yes, everyone can get laid. 
















....in their dreams.

A Sarah Michelle Gellar lookalike isn't going to find me attractive enough to have sex with me. Sometimes what you find attractive, doesn't find you attractive. You just weren't born with the face and body that they want.


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## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

Guys are also expected to perform certain social roles which are harder to perform for a guy with SA.


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## Paragon (Apr 13, 2010)

:/

Was gonna write something but.. just... bleh.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Batnaham said:


> Guys are also expected to perform certain social roles which are harder to perform for a guy with SA.


Bingo.

Girls are supposed to be quiet, shy, passive...so having social anxiety isn't that bad for a girl.

Guys are supposed to be loud, outgoing, extroverted...so having social anxiety is a death sentence.


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## gomenne (Oct 3, 2009)

WintersTale said:


> Girls are supposed to be quiet, shy, passive...so having social anxiety isn't that bad for a girl.


WOW !
Really ?!
Is that all it takes to get a date ??
Why haven't I thought about it all my life ?


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

gomenne said:


> WOW !
> Really ?!
> Is that all it takes to get a date ??
> Why haven't I thought about it all my life ?


I realize that you're being sarcastic.

And it's true that it's hard for women, too. But shy guys have it so much harder than shy girls.


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## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

When I said "Guys are also expected to perform certain social roles which are harder to perform for a guy with SA." I should have made it clear that this has been my personal problem with the few women I have 'dated'. I dont mean to start a debate on guys vs. girls. 

My point is I'm astounded that the normals think everyone (guys and girls) must find it as easy as they do and why they would think this.


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## gomenne (Oct 3, 2009)

WintersTale said:


> I realize that you're being sarcastic.
> 
> And it's true that it's hard for women, too. But shy guys have it so much harder than shy girls.


I wish you could be a girl with sa for few days, ust to prove yourself wrong.
I don't blame you though, what do you know about being a female with sa and a reject.


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## Lisa (Jul 8, 2006)

This thread has the potential to turn into yet another 'let's bash the other gender' kind of thread. Although I can see that is not what the OP intended. Just saying.... watch out for the misogynist crew and the flame baiters to arrive. Can only be a matter of moments...


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## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

I should mention that these friends of mine told me they took a vote over facebook and the result was it is impossible.


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## shadowmask (Jun 22, 2009)

The possibility always exist. If one were to put enough effort into improving their appearance, practicing their social skills, and initiating conversation with the opposite sex, then it's only a matter of time before someone else becomes interested in them. Obviously it's not easy, and it may take a while, but I can't imagine a realistic scenario in which a person would never manage to elicit attraction from a single other human being that they cross paths with. You've just got to put the work into it. Or not. It could still happen.

But if all else fails, there's always prostitutes.


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## Logitech (Jul 30, 2011)

The way I see it... You can have sex very easily. You could have sex with a deer.

Sex that you actually want though... That's got to be a bit difficult, depending on what you want and where you are. I'm fifteen though, so I don't worry much about that stuff.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

shadowmask said:


> But if all else fails, there's always prostitutes.


 They have HIV. Plus the police sting and the pimp who carries a gun. That would make me really nervous..To the op: saying that anyone can get laid is like saying everyone has confidence and can be happy.


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

I'm getting laid right now.


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## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

shadowmask said:


> The possibility always exist. If one were to put enough effort into improving their appearance, practicing their social skills, and initiating conversation with the opposite sex, then it's only a matter of time before someone else becomes interested in them. Obviously it's not easy, and it may take a while, but I can't imagine a realistic scenario in which a person would never manage to elicit attraction from a single other human being that they cross paths with. You've just got to put the work into it. Or not. It could still happen.
> 
> But if all else fails, there's always prostitutes.


I think my friend's position is that it is impossible not to get laid regardless of your current status.


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## falconpunch (Aug 2, 2011)

Is it possible without leaving the house?


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

Oh yeah... the girls are just going to fall on my groin.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Yes, anybody, I mean ANYBODY can have sex. 

But would you want to sleep with a 300 lb woman? I wouldn't. That's why I prefer not having sex.


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## shadowmask (Jun 22, 2009)

Batnaham said:


> I think my friend's position is that it is impossible not to get laid regardless of your current status.


Are you talking financial status, health status, social status? What?

I suppose if you were completely paralyzed and mute and dead poor, it'd be pretty hard to get some. But very few people are in such an unfortunate position.

Do you really believe that no women alive would have sex with you, or are you just letting SA stop you from getting what you want?



> Yes, anybody, I mean ANYBODY can have sex.
> 
> But would you want to sleep with a 300 lb woman? I wouldn't. That's why I prefer not having sex.


:ditto


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## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

shadowmask said:


> Are you talking financial status, health status, social status? What?
> 
> I suppose if you were completely paralyzed and mute and dead poor, it'd be pretty hard to get some. But very few people are in such an unfortunate position.
> 
> ...


Sorry, by status I meant SA, levelof social skills, dating/romance knowledge, other personal problems.

I was dating this women who expected me to take the male role to bed her but couldn't because of SA. People couldn't understand why I couldn't do it and called me strange for not wanting to have sex with her (I wanted to have sex with her!).

I've had sex with another women who was more easy going and didn't demand I pass a test of mettle before she would have sex with me. And I was lead gadually to the point we had sex, which the other woman would refuse to do.


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## Hot Chocolate (Sep 29, 2008)

Really? why am I not getting it?


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

LMAO @ this thread.

Are you sure your friends weren't joking? I have a seriously difficult time believing that anyone could honestly think that, and their refusal to even offer an argument certainly doesn't help any.



TPower said:


> But would you want to sleep with a 300 lb woman? I wouldn't. That's why I prefer not having sex.





shadowmask said:


> :ditto


Try _BEING_ the 300 lb. woman in this scenario. Well, not quite, but close enough. It works (or rather, _doesn't work_) both ways. :lol


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

It's called ignorance. It's easy to say everyone is a certain way when that's all they choose to see.


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## Mr Mask (Jul 11, 2011)

MavenMI6Agent009 said:


> They have HIV. Plus the police sting and the pimp who carries a gun. That would make me really nervous..To the op: saying that anyone can get laid is like saying everyone has confidence and can be happy.


There is a world of difference between street hookers and escorts from an agency. For one thing an escort has this thing called foresight. She safeguards her livelihood by ensuring her clients wear the rubber glove. I am even willing to say that escorts are safer than your average drunk barfly that takes home a different guy each night.

As for getting laid...well, its hard to wrap my head around it. I know people are doing it all the time but its something I have trouble fathoming that its real, even when I watch porn it feels like the actors are in a different universe, I have intellectual understanding of sex but its still an alien concept to me. Two years ago when this girl was rubbing my legs and flirting with me, I experienced cognitive dissonance for a few days. It really messes with my head.


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## Charizard (Feb 16, 2011)

SA isn't a good excuse, since plenty of people here have relationship experience.


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## shadowmask (Jun 22, 2009)

Batnaham said:


> My point is I'm astounded that the normals think everyone (guys and girls) must find it as easy as they do and why they would think this.


I'm sure many normals understand and have even experienced anxiety related to sexual performance, not to the degree of someone with SA, obviously. Your friends just don't sound very open-minded.



Batnaham said:


> I've had sex with another women who was more easy going and didn't demand I pass a test of mettle before she would have sex with me. And I was lead gadually to the point we had sex, which the other woman would refuse to do.


So you have been able to get laid. I guess it's not impossible in your case, then.


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## Hiccups (Jul 15, 2011)

prerequisites: 

1) functioning genitalia

2) ability to communicate with other humans

3) a shoehorn


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## shy-one (May 10, 2008)

Lisa said:


> This thread has the potential to turn into yet another 'let's bash the other gender' kind of thread. Although I can see that is not what the OP intended. Just saying.... watch out for the misogynist crew and the flame baiters to arrive. Can only be a matter of moments...


Here we go again. On these forums it seems that whenever men voice their concerns about gender inequality they are called "misogynists". There are many women on here who do the same thing, yet no-one calls them misandrists? Why is that? Oh that's right, because women are allowed to talk about gender inequality.

If you're a man talking about gender inequality then you're a "misogynist" a "woman hater" or a "whinger", but if you're a woman talking about gender inequality you're a "feminist".

Go figure.


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

their minds are weak and they can't explain what they simply know nothing about. they just see themselves and say the world is everything it seems to them on the surface. they are simply too simple minded to properly empathize and understand that people vary greatly, and everyone's experience is unique in this world.


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## S.T.A.T. (Jan 17, 2009)

MavenMI6Agent009 said:


> They have HIV. Plus the police sting and the pimp who carries a gun. That would make me really nervous..To the op: saying that anyone can get laid is like saying everyone has confidence and can be happy.


Nevada brothels are completely legal. Try there.


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## Mr Mask (Jul 11, 2011)

S.T.A.T. said:


> Nevada brothels are completely legal. Try there.


Nevada brothels are ridiculously expensive and they can afford to be, they have a monopoly. You can find a local escort for like 300 dollars tops.If anybody is serious about seeing an escort google Erotic Review. From what I've read there are some hoops you've got to jump through and gotta learn some of the proper etiquee but once you're in, you're golden.


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## heroin (Dec 10, 2010)

Once prostitution is legalized, yes. And it should be. Would bring prices down and encourage more freelancing and entrepreneurship.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

Mr Mask said:


> There is a world of difference between street hookers and escorts from an agency. For one thing an escort has this thing called foresight. She safeguards her livelihood by ensuring her clients wear the rubber glove. I am even willing to say that escorts are safer than your average drunk barfly that takes home a different guy each night.


 hmm. In my past experience with high end escorts or escorts in general not street walkers is that most of them were loosey goosey. I didnt mind because it was still sex but I still felt paranoid i was going to catch a std. I still think its risky behaviour after being the one next in line. The average escort escort has about 900 clients each year and compared to a normal steady chick maybe its 2 a year at most.


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## Witan (Jun 13, 2009)

WintersTale said:


> But shy guys have it so much harder than shy girls.


opcorn


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## binny (Aug 5, 2011)

LOwer your standards, and you'll get laid everyday. How low you go is totally up to you.


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## Lonelyguy (Nov 8, 2003)

Mr Mask said:


> As for getting laid...well, its hard to wrap my head around it. I know people are doing it all the time but its something I have trouble fathoming that its real, even when I watch porn it feels like the actors are in a different universe, I have intellectual understanding of sex but its still an alien concept to me.


Yeah, same here. I've never even touched a woman so the thought of actually having sex is completely foreign to me. I still have desires of course...but living this long without any kind of physical intimacy makes the concept of sex seem like a fantasy to me, sort of like walking on the moon. I know people all around me are doing it, but imagining myself doing it and having someone actually _wanting_ to do it with me...its almost impossible for my mind to grasp. FML


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## Witan (Jun 13, 2009)

Mr Mask said:


> As for getting laid...well, its hard to wrap my head around it. I know people are doing it all the time but its something I have trouble fathoming that its real, even when I watch porn it feels like the actors are in a different universe, I have intellectual understanding of sex but its still an alien concept to me.


Same here.


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## shadowmask (Jun 22, 2009)

Mr Mask said:


> As for getting laid...well, its hard to wrap my head around it. I know people are doing it all the time but its something I have trouble fathoming that its real, even when I watch porn it feels like the actors are in a different universe, I have intellectual understanding of sex but its still an alien concept to me.


:ditto x3


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## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

phoelomek said:


> LMAO @ this thread.
> 
> Are you sure your friends weren't joking? I have a seriously difficult time believing that anyone could honestly think that, and their refusal to even offer an argument certainly doesn't help any.


I've read that normals find it difficult to fatham people who dont get any, and it's not idea that is taken seriously. My friends are definitely like this.

They seem to think consensus amongst a group is equivalent to rational argument - so they dont feel the need to explain themselves.


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## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

Charizard said:


> SA isn't a good excuse, since plenty of people here have relationship experience.


It is good if you can find someone who will accept you for who you are - some of us meet idiots.

Also I have read on here sad stories of people who have settled for.


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## xxLambyxx (Aug 2, 2011)

Doubt i could get laid.... Havent actually left the house in nearly 2 weeks 


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## AK32 (Sep 2, 2010)

Yes, if you are in no way choosy of who the person is, anyone can get laid.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

^ Yes, as a woman that is true.

As a man, that is not true.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

It CAN be true for a man; it just depends on where his standards are and whether he puts himself out there.


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

Batnaham said:


> I've read that normals find it difficult to fatham people who dont get any, and it's not idea that is taken seriously. My friends are definitely like this.


This whole "normals" vs. "us" thing is absolutely bizarre. Where did you read this?



> They seem to think consensus amongst a group is equivalent to rational argument - so they dont feel the need to explain themselves.


Well, you obviously recognize that it's ridiculous. If these people can not, or will not even present an argument, then there is no reason to treat the claim as anything but hot air (which it is).



WintersTale said:


> ^ Yes, as a woman that is true.
> 
> As a man, that is not true.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Peter Attis said:


> It CAN be true for a man; it just depends on where his standards are and whether he puts himself out there.


A man with poor social skills around women and severe social anxiety CANNOT score. It just won't happen.

No matter what he looks like.


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## ravagingthemassacred (Aug 2, 2011)

here's my take: society's norms don't have to govern the way you think about things.....do your own thing. don't feel forced into acting against your personality or anything. if a person like YOU exists, there are other people like you that exist. No one is truly unique. it's just a matter of finding them (and THESE are the people that most likely you will have the best relationships with...). And I realize it's usually extremely difficult to find these people (especially when you have horrible SA). I mean, if you are a less common type it's going to be tougher to find other people like yourself. that's why if/when you find them/him/her the relationship will be that much more special and meaningful. the thing is- DON'T feel like you have to SETTLE in the meantime. you don't.


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## Batnaham (Jul 1, 2011)

phoelomek said:


> This whole "normals" vs. "us" thing is absolutely bizarre. Where did you read this?


People have given a name to not getting any: involuntary ceibacy (incel). There is this incelsite:

http://www.involuntarycelibacy.com/about.html

where they say: "The most obvious reasons for some incels would be social phobia or a significant degree of social incompetence."

and

"It [incel] does not appear to be a concept taken seriously by those who do not experience it"

I've also talked to incels on an incel internet forum. One guy for example went on a relationships radio show and he said the presenter, none of the other guests, or any of the listeners could get their head around the idea that there are people who cant get laid.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

Some people are just really messed up even if I had a stash of twenty thousand dollars in a escort room I still couldn't get laid


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## Hiccups (Jul 15, 2011)

This woe me I'm male so therefore I can't get layed is such BS. Put yourself *out there* and be *realistic*. The only reason you can't is because you don't *try*, and when I say try I mean *try*.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Hiccups said:


> This woe me I'm male so therefore I can't get layed is such BS. Put yourself *out there* and be *realistic*. The only reason you can't is because you don't *try*, and when I say try I mean *try*.


But do women even have to try?

Hell, they always talk about some creepy guys want to sleep with them. They do nothing and get sex proposals.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

TPower said:


> But do women even have to try?
> 
> Hell, they always talk about some creepy guys want to sleep with them. They do nothing and get sex proposals.


Good point.


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## Witan (Jun 13, 2009)

Hiccups said:


> This woe me I'm male so therefore I can't get layed is such BS. Put yourself *out there* and be *realistic*. The only reason you can't is because you don't *try*, and when I say try I mean *try*.


I'm not sure why you would say this on a forum for people with social anxiety :con


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## Chris16 (Nov 1, 2010)

Witan said:


> I'm not sure why you would say this on a forum for people with social anxiety :con


Her tone was a little forward, but I think it's true. Even divorced from the getting laid thing, the most "trying" that most people (not just men) do on this forum to overcome SA is posting on SAS and brooding. It's an easy trap to fall into because it's safe and there are no immediate negative consequences, but it's a poor choice none the less.


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

I was hoping that posting in this thread about getting laid would get me laid.

What am I doing wrong?


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Even while trying hard, getting sex with a remotely attractive woman is extremely difficult.


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

TPower said:


> But do women even have to try?
> 
> Hell, they always talk about some creepy guys want to sleep with them. They do nothing and get sex proposals.





WintersTale said:


> Good point.


Okay, this is beginning to get a little frustrating. :|

*YES.* There is a WHOLE "demographic" (if you will), of us who either can't, or have an extremely difficult time getting laid (even without considering SA).

Why? Because often, our mere _EXISTENCE_ is treated as a universal joke. It is not uncommon for men to talk about fat women as if we are not even human beings. The idea that we'd even have the AUDACITY to want to have sex with someone provokes either embarrassment or hysterics.

By your own admission (see below), you would rather continue to go sexless than to have sex with someone who looks likes me, all while going on about how much harder it is for men to get laid! Just where do you think that puts all the 300 lb women? Or don't fat women count as women?



TPower said:


> But would you want to sleep with a 300 lb woman? I wouldn't. That's why I prefer not having sex.


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## pollster (Oct 4, 2009)

Took the words right out of my mouth, phoelomek.

Apparently fat women do have to try. A lot.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

To be fair, and a bit mean to men in general, some of them would just **** anything that walks. Hell, there are sometimes on the news, cases of men caught, and facing jail for having sex with sheeps or goats. 

That's completely f***** up.


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## pollster (Oct 4, 2009)

Wow. How did this go from 300lb women to men tapping sheep and goats?


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

No. The idea was just that yes, 300 lb women have options, sex-wise. Obviously not as much as 120 lb women, but that's natural selection.


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

pollster said:


> Wow. How did this go from 300lb women to men tapping sheep and goats?


If you have to ask that, then you'll just never understand men.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

zookeeper said:


> If you have to ask that, then you'll just never understand men.


:rofl

You, sir, just made my day!


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## pollster (Oct 4, 2009)

Zookeeper, why do you string them along like that? :b


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

pollster said:


> Zookeeper, why do you string them along like that? :b


The goats?

They get away otherwise.


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## pollster (Oct 4, 2009)

I thought you weren't allowed near goats anymore.


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## heroin (Dec 10, 2010)

A girl with a waist 4 times the size of my own seemed to show interest once. It never went anywhere because she stuck to the "hint but never outright ask" script. And I don't even have any standards. For the record, I would have (and will) sleep with a 300lb woman if I am single (am not presently). My standards are non-existent, but I had never been involved with a girl until I turned 29. And I am relatively normal, in shape, employed and not anxious in social situations (my problem is avoidance).

So no, it is not possible, as a man, to just get laid whenever you want if you have no standards. The only way I could have would have been patronizing a prostitute's services.


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

TPower said:


> Hell, there are sometimes on the news, cases of men caught, and facing jail for having sex with sheeps or goats.
> 
> That's completely f***** up.


This is supposed to be a jab at men?

Oh! Wait, I get it. At least there are still some men deranged enough to have sex with the disgusting fatties, right? That's why women still have an easier time getting laid?

Ok.


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## keyla965 (Jan 13, 2011)

i sure as hell cant lol. idk why. I dont think im THAT ugly.


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## keyla965 (Jan 13, 2011)

i thought that somthing was wrong with me. I dont really have any standards either. I'm glad to know that I'm not alone.


heroin said:


> A girl with a waist 4 times the size of my own seemed to show interest once. It never went anywhere because she stuck to the "hint but never outright ask" script. And I don't even have any standards. For the record, I would have (and will) sleep with a 300lb woman if I am single (am not presently). My standards are non-existent, but I had never been involved with a girl until I turned 29. And I am relatively normal, in shape, employed and not anxious in social situations (my problem is avoidance).
> 
> So no, it is not possible, as a man, to just get laid whenever you want if you have no standards. The only way I could have would have been patronizing a prostitute's services.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

phoelomek said:


> This is supposed to be a jab at men?
> 
> Oh! Wait, I get it. At least there are still some men deranged enough to have sex with the disgusting fatties, right? That's why women still have an easier time getting laid?
> 
> Ok.


Men need women more than women need men.

And that's a fact.


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

pollster said:


> I thought you weren't allowed near goats anymore.


_Near_. That's such a vague word.

That's why the judge specified 100 meters.


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