# Panic Attack before oral exam



## vienna812 (Feb 28, 2013)

I'm really disappointed in myself. After the panic attack the first half of the exam went OK, the second half was AWFUL. 

I arrived about 25 minutes early, because that was the amount of time I need to rehearse 3 times in my head, so I wouldn’t feel rushed, but wouldn’t be ‘stewing’ - for me ‘stewing’ makes things worse. Anyway, I had to ‘stew’ because the exams were running behind. I was supposed to be 14:15, but I was more like 14:25. I was fairly calm until just before 2pm, when another girl from my class came and sat in the corridor with me. I then kind of spent until 14:25 building up to the panic attack. I rarely go ‘all the way’ to uncontrollable breathing and shaking. Usually it’s just tight chest, some heavy breathing and shaking in my hands and legs and that was going on, and I actually thought to myself that ‘it can’t get any worse, you CAN get through it in this state.’ 

So finally it’s my turn to go in. I’m almost at the door and my teacher (who is also the examiner, and is so so lovely) told me not to look so worried. Then I sat down and snapped. I couldn’t breath or get words to come out of my mouth. I tried to ask to go to the bathroom, but could barely manage it. She just nodded and I ran. PAST EVERYONE WAITING TO GO INTO FOR THEIR EXAM. Luckily the girl from my class that was waiting is actually really kind. Lots of people don’t like her because she is so childish, but she is very kind and won’t tell everyone, like some other people might. There were some other students from the year below and other departments, one of them tried to follow me to the bathroom, but my teacher stopped her. I calmed myself down and went back. 

The presentation went well. I don’t know if this is a thing, but I genuinely think I was over prepared. Like I should have been at 10am this morning. I’m fairly sure that it was full of grammatical errors, and I know the free conversation was. My teacher was really kind at the end and told me about how she had panicked sitting her driving test a few years ago, which was actually some comfort as I am terrified of ever sitting my driving test. I am terrified of one-on-one anything, but I am also terrified of driving. 

Anyway, I just wanted to vent. The only girl from my class was so sweet and probably won't say anything. I just wanted to tell people because I sure as hell can't tell my parents or any of my friends. I just feel so rotten because everyone else is talking about how well their's went.


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## Brasilia (Aug 23, 2012)

Awww, I think you handled yourself as best as you could.


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## tynachosyum (Apr 22, 2013)

it must have taken a lot of courage to walk back in that class room, you did good !


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