# Extreme Loneliness



## vela (Apr 19, 2012)

Okay, I think I seriously suck at this people thing. Just this year I've had three people in my life just up and disappear! Well two like completely disappeared without a word and another let me know she was leaving. Okay then... 

Then my "best friend" like has barely spoken to me for the past few months. She says she's been too busy. But we're still best friends and she loves talking to me. 

In the meantime she has time to meet this girl on a dating app and says they "text all the time". Nice... 

it also doesn't help that I have a huge crush on her. So that crushed me like twice as much. ugh... 

I am sooooooooo lonely!! Do you ever get so lonely that you feel like you're going to die just from loneliness? 

What I need are more friends but I have no idea how to make them. It's not like I ever leave the house, I don't. Well except for therapy. I'm also too terrified to really be social much online. I think I'm posting here because I have nowhere else to go. 

Maybe I'm also hoping people will feel sorry for me and want to be my friend? lol I don't know anymore. I don't understand anything anymore. 

All I know is that I'm tired of being so isolated from everything and everyone. I'm tired of being lonely. Soul crushing loneliness is so not fun. 

The thing I worry about though is do I even know how to relate to people anymore? Have I been isolated for so long that I'm just a total mess when it comes to being social? I have no idea.


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## Juan Jose (Dec 14, 2015)

I'm in the same situation and me is told that it's completely normal and that it the real life.


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## Anon227 (Sep 24, 2015)

Juan Jose said:


> I'm in the same situation and me is told that it's completely normal and that it the real life.


agreed, and this statement also implies that real life sucks, which is true for the vast majority unfortunately.


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## AquarianHorse (Nov 30, 2015)

I feel the same way. Ever feel like you wish you can just go to bed and not wake up? It sucks when you do wake up because it's like why did you even have to? 

I feel like nothing good I do gets noticed, I am a good person, I am human but nope, I am not allowed to make mistakes but hey if other people do it's perfectly fine but nope, not me. 

I feel cursed and like I am only alive for others to hurt others. Ever feel like that too? 

I want to be all of your friends


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## Shawn81 (Jul 9, 2014)

vela said:


> Okay, I think I seriously suck at this people thing. Just this year I've had three people in my life just up and disappear! Well two like completely disappeared without a word and another let me know she was leaving. Okay then...
> 
> Then my "best friend" like has barely spoken to me for the past few months. She says she's been too busy. But we're still best friends and she loves talking to me.
> 
> ...


Yes.

And I can relate to basically everything below that.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

We're all lonely.


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## sosassy (Oct 29, 2014)

I'm lonely too and it's very embarrassing to admit it


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## Dark Jewel (Jul 18, 2014)

vela said:


> I am sooooooooo lonely!! Do you ever get so lonely that you feel like you're going to die just from loneliness?
> .


I feel like that all of the time.


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## XxCrystalXx (Jun 24, 2015)

Yes. I find it difficult to befriend people. I over-think and make things complicated because I am afraid of being criticized by others.


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## gumballhead (Jun 8, 2011)

I don't know. maybe it's because I grew up with only my Mom around for so many years, but I don't constantly need to be around people. I've never been used to having all that many people around anyway. I do get "that" kind of lonely semi frequently. Just a girl to cuddle up with would be nice. Sometimes I'd like a few friends around to shoot the **** with too, but I've never really had an extreme need for them. I'm looking on the bright side. I have a feeling my life is going to change in one way or another soon. I always say that at the end of the year, but I think this time it could be, with my newfound positive attitude.


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## Apoc (Nov 12, 2010)

I'll be your friend if you like.


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## Swagonite (Jun 24, 2014)

vela said:


> Okay, I think I seriously suck at this people thing. Just this year I've had three people in my life just up and disappear! Well two like completely disappeared without a word and another let me know she was leaving. Okay then...
> 
> Then my "best friend" like has barely spoken to me for the past few months. She says she's been too busy. But we're still best friends and she loves talking to me.
> 
> ...


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## vinegar (Jun 22, 2013)

i feel that, about not relating to anyone. it sucks because i talk to one or two people every day so i feel ungrateful but i crave some kind of unfulfillable closeness with another person. nothing romantic necessarily, i just feel so stunted loving everything and everyone so much with no way to express it. i always cringe when i find myself being mushy with someone i know so i resort to spilling my lame loser heart on the internet to strangers, lol. i wish i wasn't so dependant. 
i feel like i'm on another level, but in a bad way. at 4 in the morning this is my last place for human contact


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## hulkamaniak (Mar 21, 2008)

I am in the same situation, my best friend is barely talking to me. I am bi and have a bit of a crush on him, does your friend know you have a crush on her? I guess with females it isn't as freaky? My friend is straight so I obviously have never said a thing about it.


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## AlyssiaStras (Feb 5, 2012)

*I know exactly how you feel*

I know what you mean about being lonely. I wish I could make friends and I do try but I think why would I be someones friend if they already have friends.

The thing is I go out all the time with school, the gym, yoga but people still ignore me and I try to be friendly but it takes so much effort and its so draining to have to make sure I am saying the right thing and not being overly friendly, I just the what the point of even trying anymore if nobody seems to even want to get to know me.

I just hate not having anyone I can talk to or call a friend, I feel so alone. If I was to vanish no one would even notice.


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## AlyssiaStras (Feb 5, 2012)

XxCrystalXx said:


> Yes. I find it difficult to befriend people. I over-think and make things complicated because I am afraid of being criticized by others.


That's exactly how I feel too :crying:


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## panda7 (Aug 5, 2015)

I feel the same way too. If I could just have one friend I could talk to, who I could hangout with almost everyday, my life would be fulfilled. Until then, I have to combat this empty/lonely feeling I experience on a daily basis, no matter what I do, even the things I love doing.

I also feel like it's difficult to make friends nowadays, and when I do make friends, it always remains on a superficial level. I'm the type of person who says, "Hey, we should hangout sometime!" to people I meet, but all I receive are empty promises..


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## Batcat (Nov 19, 2014)

I feel the same. I've been having some extreme bouts of loneliness recently. The new year is just a reminder of what lies ahead of me. I haven't made a single new friend in 9 years and I feel the friendships I had once were useless because I felt no emotional connection.

I think this is why I'm slowly accepting I'll never be capable of forming a close relationship with anyone. I'm just naturally closed off because I fear opening up due to fear of being hurt.


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## kiwikiwi (Jul 27, 2009)

What are you going to do about it? No one wants to meet new people and don't want to come out of their shells. **** them all, talk to the walls they listen better I swear!


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## losthismarbles (Jul 5, 2014)

Yeah I hate it. I try to keep myself distracted but if I don't I start feeling really lonely. I can get pretty painful.


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## lonerroom (May 16, 2015)

I am lonely too, I am trying my hardest to stop caring because no one stays my friend for long, everyone abandons me sooner or later, no one I ever met is capable of being loyal for long. A dog is the only hope to get away from lonliness, no human will stay loyal for long.


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## vela (Apr 19, 2012)

Thanks for all the lovely replies everyone! It means so much to me that I'm not completely alone! 

I apologize for not responding sooner. I've been falling apart and finding it impossible to interact with people on most days. So that's where I've been. Things have been getting very dark for me. 

I guess I'm just not as interesting to my best friend anymore now that she's met this girl. She's really into her. So I guess I'm just a lower priority now? Which really hurts. I would never do that to anyone.  So I guess I have my answer now. btw.. I told her how I felt about her, she just ignored it. So there's my other answer. 

No one will ever love me. Ever.. I'm convinced of this now. Why would they? I'm nothing and I can't even take care of myself and function in the world. I have nothing to offer anyone. I'm just garbage. 

I just want to feel loved and like someone really cares about me. :'(


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## chessman6500 (Sep 5, 2013)

I know everybody has thrown their 2p in already but I have an experience to share.

I currently have one IRL friend and an online friend I talk to regularly. I have no other "friends" per se. I do have people I know but they are more like fake friends not real friends. I am gonna be moving soon, I haven't given myself enough time yet to talk to most of the new people living there, however I have seen one person already who lives there. He was nice about it, we went to see a movie in the theaters and his mom gave me his number but when I started texting him, I got no answer. How is this possible? When I fully move in this week I will need to start talking to him more to hopefully develop a better relationship with him. the other tenants aren't talkative but I'm sure with some effort, I'll be able to make friends with them. If not that's their loss. 


I have gone through this rut for years, and still to this day, I cannot figure out a way to solve it.


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## yurt (Mar 23, 2015)

aw we're all so alike at least we have each other to talk to. Imagine there was no internet and this website. How much more lonely we would feel.. Not having the comfort of knowing that at least we're not the only ones and not completely alone.


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## Pierre1 (Apr 25, 2013)

I was feeling pretty lonely the other day it was like chronic loneliness I felt so isolated. Personally I just want to meet people and have fun its 2016 now and I want to have fun...


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## pointless (Jan 11, 2016)

vela said:


> Okay, I think I seriously suck at this people thing. Just this year I've had three people in my life just up and disappear! Well two like completely disappeared without a word and another let me know she was leaving. Okay then...
> 
> Then my "best friend" like has barely spoken to me for the past few months. She says she's been too busy. But we're still best friends and she loves talking to me.
> 
> ...


i was having very good friends 3 years ago.. but now i am ****ing lonely. I MEAN NO FRIENDS I SWEAR.. it sucks but i got used to this situation.. they all dissapeared from my life.. all..


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## Bigmo (May 28, 2013)

I know how you feel, I tried everything including meetups, trying to talk to people at work, I just can't make friends. Now I have accepted that I am a loner.


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## rookiexox (Jan 11, 2016)

Yes, but everyone on this forum like you so now you have new acquaintances. Find something positive that you can focus on like school or sports.


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## Tiffiduliu (Jul 7, 2014)

Everyone, even the coolest kids, experience loneliness at some part of their lives.


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## weeKenDsx (Jan 6, 2016)

My best friends who are just like me try to improve their lives and tell me I'm just to negative and it seems that this tight bond that exists between us is about to be torn apart ... I think this will either force me into getting to know more ppl or lead me into complete nihilism .


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## 7th.Streeter (May 11, 2011)

AquarianHorse said:


> I feel the same way. Ever feel like you wish you can just go to bed and not wake up? It sucks when you do wake up because it's like why did you even have to?
> 
> I feel like nothing good I do gets noticed, I am a good person, I am human but nope, I am not allowed to make mistakes but hey if other people do it's perfectly fine but nope, not me.
> 
> ...


Wow we can be friends..especially with that first statement...i truly hate waking up sometimes I really do wonder why...why do I keep waking w ? Just to get served more loneliness and isolation..thanks gawd.


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## booored (Jun 19, 2011)

same. i just got back from my first day in college after 5 years of avoiding it because anxiety. during those five years i thought that when i go to college i will magically be less anxious and have the life i want. i was kind of excited about it too. but today i realized im as bad as i always was. everyone was talking and making friends while i was sitting alone doing homework. it made me realize how lonely i am and incapable of having friends and im scared i will be like this for the rest of my life. but, this thread kind of made me feel better so thanks for that


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