# No life experiences



## lonely81 (Aug 22, 2011)

I am a 30 year old female with no life experiences. I have no friends at all, except for one who I hang out with occasionally. I live alone so I am very lonely. 
I really have no life experiences. I have never had a real boyfriend, just a couple of brief month long things. I have basically wasted the last ten years of my life. I have never travelled, never been on a plane. Don't have a driver's license. Haven't really done much in the past 8 years at all. I used to live with my parents and basically did nothing up until about 2 years ago when I finally moved into the city on my own, hoping that things would change. They haven't really. I just do nothing by myself now. I don't go out. I go to work, exercise and watch tv. It's really bad when you have nothing to look forward to. I feel so behind everyone my age. I have nothing to offer anyone and don't know how to change things. 
I can't believe how much of my life has been wasted. How can I change things? The one thing I would love to have more than anything is a loving real relationship with a man, fall in love, have someone to share my life with. But I am afraid I have nothing to offer them. I know I have to find happiness within myself first and be happy with my life and not try to find a man to fulfill all my needs, I need to have a life of my own. But how can I do it? I need friends, but it's hard to make them when you get older. I can't join any kind of groups or anything like that because I can't really afford it right now. I really don't know what to do.


















I am a 30 year old female with no life experiences. I have no friends at all, except for one who I hang out with occasionally. I live alone so I am very lonely. 
I really have no life experiences. I have never had a real boyfriend, just a couple of brief month long things. I have basically wasted the last ten years of my life. I have never travelled, never been on a plane. Don't have a driver's license. Haven't really done much in the past 8 years at all. I used to live with my parents and basically did nothing up until about 2 years ago when I finally moved into the city on my own, hoping that things would change. They haven't really. I just do nothing by myself now. I don't go out. I go to work, exercise and watch tv. It's really bad when you have nothing to look forward to. I feel so behind everyone my age. I have nothing to offer anyone and don't know how to change things. 
I can't believe how much of my life has been wasted. How can I change things? The one thing I would love to have more than anything is a loving real relationship with a man, fall in love, have someone to share my life with. But I am afraid I have nothing to offer them. I know I have to find happiness within myself first and be happy with my life and not try to find a man to fulfill all my needs, I need to have a life of my own. But how can I do it? I need friends, but it's hard to make them when you get older. I can't join any kind of groups or anything like that because I can't really afford it right now. I really don't know what to do.


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## apinkfloydfan (Jul 28, 2011)

this is my first reply to anyone's post and i'm new to this site. We have some things in common in that i have really only one (occasional) friend, i also feel like my life's being wasted and i am very lonely too. I'm glad that you exercise - i have been trying to get motivated to start. Do you go to church? i know there are frequently singles groups there and it's free and a less threatening place. try not to feel like you're far behind - you're 30 which is very young and still lot's of possibilities. like i said this is my first post - i feel shy even on-line...hope to hear from you


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## Lisa (Jul 8, 2006)

Well, make a handful of small changes.

1. Come here and socialize. It will make a difference.
2. Instead of exercising on your own (I presume that is what you do) try team sports. That'll make a big difference and it doesn't cost any extra money.
3. Try some online dating. The chances of finding the right one are probably slim but you will have lots of new experiences + it gets you out of the house.

Hope this helps 

Edit: ADD: 4. Have you thought about joining a self help group for SA? A therapist would probably also be a good idea.


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## phl0em (Oct 17, 2014)

I'm in exactly the same position. Life is an utter joke where some people get everything and we get nothing but fear and fk'd up genetics.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

why do new posters always do necrobumps?


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## bonz (Jun 6, 2007)

Exactly same position as you, although I'm looking for a place on my own for now.

One thing that comes to mind is to join a social group. Being exercise your interest, join a hiking group, bike group etc. Personally I'd do that as I'm an active person, but I've yet accomplished it. It's a goal, and hopefully something that'll interest you too.


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## ilsr (Aug 29, 2010)

same here, just different being male at 12 years older than you. sometimes I wonder if women will only date a guy they can sense who will "die" for them, or have an arm or hand cut off, or a testicle. yet, seemingly sometimes it's just someone who has socially influence that people look up to. Losers don't "win" anything. But yet, it's hopeless because there is no perspective. Most every day I wonder if I would go straight below if I go the suicide route. when I used to have a job, it was my life, and it was better than nothing, I would sleep most of the weekend recovering from the anxiety and the insults and dissing from the enemies at work never ending battles etc. Missed out on much of the days. Then after no job, the suicide thoughts come back again. Just meeting any stranger is humiliation when they see I have nothing except losing in my life. No family of my own. a failed profession. 

if there's a silver linging, you still have a job. nobody at work to be friends with?, mostly people you don't like? I get that too if that's the case.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

This thread was back before I was out of my 20's.


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## roberts (Sep 19, 2014)

I am in a very similar position. I really want a friend I really just want some to go see a movie with or to a restaurant. I can't do these thing alone I'm too scared and feel like a loser (which I guess I am).


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## BehindClosedDoors (Oct 16, 2014)

Haha "necrobumps", good one. Probably because there is no other topic in this section that the person identifies/commiserates with so they pop it back up to the top. Oh well, life goes on. People get miffy when someone posts a new topic that's already been done to death so there is no winning this one 

Roberts you aren't a loser by the way. Love yourself man, it starts with you and others will follow your lead.


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## ilsr (Aug 29, 2010)

roberts said:


> I am in a very similar position. I really want a friend I really just want some to go see a movie with or to a restaurant. I can't do these thing alone I'm too scared and feel like a loser (which I guess I am).


I know what you mean. It really sucks. Even if I'm buying food supplies at the grocery store (so I don't have to eat alone at a restaurant or yet again a drive-in fast food; need to stop doing that, very unhealthy and expensive), sometimes some random person(often in a group) gets in my way or in my face trying to diss me or something with some stupid joke probably because they "spotted" me as a loser.


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