# I've finally learned how to live



## VioletHour (Aug 26, 2013)

I've been on this site since August, and I've gotten a lot of helpful suggestions and support from people. I wanted to thank anyone who's given me support over the past couple of months. After 12 weeks of intense therapy, some real self-reflection, and a lot of self-discipline, I am no longer considered to have debilitating anxiety (general and social). I've met a guy and gone on a couple dates. I've given presentation in my classes. I've pledged a professional fraternity and started training for a 5k. 

I want to say something though. A year ago, I wasn't sure I could ever learn how to be happy because my anxiety was eating me alive. Everywhere I went, I was convinced people were judging me and I was miserable. Please, any one else who feels that way, know there is hope. I know every single one of us is different but I want you to know I found the change I never thought was possible. Here's what I learned over three months of work:
1. The majority of the people in the world are nice. I'm an introvert and I was scared of people, but most people, given a chance, are kind
2. Find something you really care about and keep caring about it. I love to write poetry and focusing on that takes my mind off my anxiety
3. There is always hope and there is a chance, you just have to have the right combination of variables for a change to occur. For me, that combination was therapy, exercise, nutrition counseling for an eating disorder, structured social interaction at professional events, and lots of downtime with my family who don't judge me for being weird. 

So thanks everyone. I am happy for the first time in four years and this site started my road to seeking help. I sincerely hope everyone will find the change that they need to be happy. But, hey, when it all comes down to it, we're all pretty awesome the way we are :yes


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## ToughUnderdog (Jul 7, 2013)

Good for you. The problem is that the general anxiety just doesn't always go away. I'd like to believe achieving goals and some degree of happiness will alleviate some of my depression and anxiety, but I can't expect quick fixes and constant happiness. Like you said, there are certain variables that are needed to move the pendulum into a positive state of mind. 

Stay at it as much as you can. Don't get discouraged when things go wrong. Once thing I practice doing, is to stay strong and calm. That's all I can do sometimes when the worst comes.


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## xgodmetashogun (Apr 2, 2013)

great job, you got yourself together so quickly. ive been here since April and Ive been getting better then getting much worse.Now i think im getting a little better,gonna sleep more and eat a little better and get more sunlight and see if that helps.


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## redbrand12 (Nov 23, 2013)

You story has inspired me! I will work hard on overcoming my social anxiety.


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## Irvy (Nov 27, 2013)

Very inspiring indeed


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## AndrewFord (Dec 2, 2013)

This is so inspiring. My anxiety is at very early stages and I'm finding it difficult to comprehend how long I may feel like this but you have now shown me there is a light at the end of the tunnel growing ever stronger day by day. Thank you for this post, must of been fate me reading this


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## Rocklover639 (Jan 3, 2011)

The smell of success, something this place needs more of. Congrats I'm not too far behind you from curing my SAD. We will now be able to contribute to this planet because people are missing out on what we have too offer! Congrats!


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## Benjeee (Nov 4, 2013)

Wow thats great!
What kinda 12 week therapy helped you?


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## Lyle T (Nov 23, 2013)

great work!


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## VioletHour (Aug 26, 2013)

Benjeee said:


> Wow thats great!
> What kinda 12 week therapy helped you?


Hi Benjeee, I did weekly therapy sessions with some cognitive behavioral therapy as well. I started cognitive behavioral therapy last year and gave up after 4 sessions, but I was inspired by people on this site to try again in September. I had weekly sessions with a therapist to talk about why I was so anxious. She really helped me focus on what was causing day to day anxiety so I could rationalize with myself and calm myself down. We also worked on techniques to calm myself down in public so I wouldn't stutter or panic. Since my social anxiety is tied to OCD related traits (body image problems and racing thoughts) most of my therapy was how to talk myself down before my thoughts get too out of control.

That said, if you are thinking of trying therapy, don't be afraid to get a consultation with several different therapists until you find one you click with. The one I worked with is my third therapist because I didn't work well with the other two. One tried to diagnose me with Asperger's (after 10 minutes of our first session) and the other encouraged me to be more religious (good advice for some but it didn't help me).

Therapy was my lifesaver for me because I needed someone to point me in the right direction and help me get my life together. If you ever try it, make sure you find one who is willing to accept you however you come and will push you to truly change your life.

Best of luck and good wishes to you!


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## VioletHour (Aug 26, 2013)

redbrand12 said:


> You story has inspired me! I will work hard on overcoming my social anxiety.


You can do it! Best of luck to you!


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## A Void Ant (Mar 10, 2012)

Very inspiring.


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## suej (Oct 20, 2013)

definitely resonated with me when you mentioned you used to feel like people were always judging you and that it made you miserable. i feel like that all the time and it's terrible. i always think that people don't like me. i'm in therapy right now doing CBT and hope to have great results like you. thanks for sharing your story!


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## Perception (Nov 25, 2013)

Thanks for sharing


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## guitarmatt (Aug 13, 2009)

I'm so glad you were able to turn things around. like someone else said, this site needs more inspirational posts like this


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## worriedsick11 (Dec 21, 2013)

It sounds like things are going great for you! Keep it up and all the best!
So nice to have a positive post like this.


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