# Everyone is just "too busy"



## WhiteKitty (Jun 4, 2014)

It's the think nowadays, to be "too busy" is to say "I got a REAL LIFE, and I'm making it big in the world for myself" or basically "I'm so important that I don't need you anymore". 

Other times, it's the stress of completing a huge degree to find stable work. But.....it's just a big ego thing overall, I feel. Everyone, either secretly or not, desires at least one close connection or two, but now its so hard to find anyone who will put time aside. I will never beleive anyone who ever says "I DONT have time", because, what I see is most people get 2 days a week off work, and honestly, why would you NOT want to eat out for supper after work even with a buddy? who really, honestly just wants to sit alone at home, or go straight to their nagging spouse, gf/bf, or kids without some relief with a friend to just chill beforehand? 

I see it as, people just refues to MAKE time. We watch tv, play videogames, spend hours on forums, or whatever it is...and yes, it's good to have a quiet, social-less break. But never, no time, every week? No way. I don't buy it. Maybe if we all spent waaaaaaaaay less time on Facebook, Instgram etc (those that do it, anyway! congrats to those with more self-control, twitter is stupid anyways, absolute waste of your mental space), and realized "wait, I got REAL friends, I can see for REAL?". But, nowadays so many are so self-conceited and don't like "real", they just like "flattering". 

I'm an introvert, sure, but I have this void in my soul lately that feels so lacking----I already went through the online phases earier as a nerd, before facebook was so huge, and I barely do stuff on it---I am not desperate, I am just fully realizing I barely see people I connect with, as I remember what it felt like to spend time with my friends a few years ago, having fun and enjoying time together for it's own sake. I feel alone to day dream of things to do---I got board games with no one to play with, I got places I want to bring a buddy to, but nobody most times available. I wanted to find a Meetup, but most I seek don't exist , or they make meetups I dislike that aren't fitting for me at all. Husband stares off into his stupid cellphone all the time, zoning out and scrolling over article headlines---he does this a lot, at home, on park trails, in the car (not when driving thank God), everywhere. It makes you feel alone even if they are physically there...but you know, this person doing this around you is NOT really "There" with you---they are "somewhere else", and it feels far, far worse than just going that place of your interest alone without them---at least you can do things at your pace and not drag a screen-zombie behind you, that makes you feel like you are just forcing them to do things, so it makes the whole thing less enjoyable. 

2017 res: time to meet some people who truely want to spend time with you. Finding a meetup, a local hobby club, just anything...I think we need to keep looking because it's for our own good anyways to find a healthy support network to help us grow and feel cared about. I feel so tired of being miserable...I want to actually start to "live", for real. Not this fake "Busy" stuff to distract myself dealing with what my real needs are. If I want someone to make time, it's my half to ensure I do the same-----we shouldn't ever expect others to make time if we won't!


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## Crystal Kirscht (Jan 20, 2017)

I completely understand. When I finally do meet people who may want to get together with me, they can't make plans for months out because they are "so busy" with all their other work and social commitments. It's like why does everyone else have so much going on and I don't? I feel like such a loser


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## Flutterlee (Aug 11, 2016)

I get you totally. I feel the same. Its like I tell someone "we need to hang out haven't seen you in a while" and they're liek "yea! " but..that's it. They don't make the effort. And I am the only one making the effort. And i feel like some people really don't take the time to "make time" for their relationships. Relationships are something that need to be nurtured for them to work..from both parties. I totally get your frustration. I think we have to remember some relationships will work out and some wont. Its a hard thing to have to learn. But its a risk with any relationship. And I'm sorry about the issue with your husband. Maybe telling him how it makes you feel might help? I don't know. I just hope it gets better for you.


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