# Always asked, "Are you always so quiet? "



## Nanami (Aug 1, 2013)

Even when I try my hardest to socialize at work I always get shot down by a comment about me being so quiet. Why are you so quiet? You're so shy! She never talks half the time I don't even notice she's here. :lol You're so quiet. You're so quiet. You're so quiet! Just leave me alone. :|

I can't help it. I wish I were comfortable with who I was but when everyone seems to expect everyone to be outgoing and extroverted I can't help but feel uneasy. Most of the time I just don't feel like talking. I honestly just don't want to be around people most of the time. I'm fine making small talk when I chose too and feel up to it, but when I feel like I'm expected to I get anxious. I'm depressed. Who wants to talk to anyone when they feel like sh**? 

Why don't people understand that when you tell a quiet or shy person that they're shy or quiet that that isn't helpful at all? Why in school do they vote for Quietest Male and Female? How is that an award?? How is that nothing but embarrassing?! W/e, it's annoying.


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## BKLD (Aug 8, 2013)

God, I know! Throughout my schooling, I always heard from teachers and other students, why are you so quiet? It could get very obnoxious, and I'm not easily annoyed.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

To most people, quiet people are a curiosity. They don't mean any harm by asking you why your so quiet, but they also don't understand how uncomfortable that question makes you. Most likely they are just trying to feel you out and get to know you. Would you rather just be ignored altogether? I know I wouldn't.

I work with 2 other people that are actually more quiet than me and I find myself wanting to get to know them more because of it.


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## Nanami (Aug 1, 2013)

BKLD said:


> God, I know! Throughout my schooling, I always heard from teachers and other students, why are you so quiet? It could get very obnoxious, and I'm not easily annoyed.


It's one of my pet peeves. I don't even know how one could answer "Why are you so quiet?" Umm, I just am? Or do they want us to confide in them our problems? Should we say, "I'm frightened of speaking in front of people." or "I get anxious around people." or "I'm depressed, so leave me the * alone!" haha. They'd just end up saying something useless like, talk more or be more confident!

I know people mean well or maybe they're just curious or don't understand why someone isn't talkative but it still bothers me.


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## Nanami (Aug 1, 2013)

RelinquishedHell said:


> To most people, quiet people are a curiosity. They don't mean any harm by asking you why your so quiet, but they also don't understand how uncomfortable that question makes you. Most likely they are just trying to feel you out and get to know you. Would you rather just be ignored altogether? I know I wouldn't.
> 
> I work with 2 other people that are actually more quiet than me and I find myself wanting to get to know them more because of it.


 Yeah I agree they mean no harm. It still gets to me sometimes though, at least when I constantly get asked or overhear someone say it to/about me. I also understand that I probably make some people feel uncomfortable because I either don't seem approachable or I give off vibes that make people feel awkward uneasy. When it comes down to it I'm more annoyed with myself that I can't be so carefree with talking to others and being reminded of that fact makes me angry.

Thanks for the reply! :]


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## MissyH (Jul 31, 2013)

Nanami said:


> It's one of my pet peeves. I don't even know how one could answer "Why are you so quiet?" *Umm, I just am?*


That's always my answer to that annoying question.


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## tony420 (Jul 27, 2013)

i just say no one has anything interesting to say lol


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## Lonely Tiger (Aug 8, 2013)

yeah it can feel bad sometimes, but at the same time if i find my curiosity go up around quiet people. They're a completely mystery, sometimes the quiet person can turn out to be a really cool person, you know what they say "don't judge a book by its cover".


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## Greenleaf62 (Aug 1, 2013)

Nanami said:


> Even when I try my hardest to socialize at work I always get shot down by a comment about me being so quiet. Why are you so quiet? You're so shy! She never talks half the time I don't even notice she's here. :lol You're so quiet. You're so quiet. You're so quiet! Just leave me alone. :|


Wow, this is literally my life. It's really annoying too, especially that comment about being so quiet that it's like I'm not even there. I mean, do you expect me to hold a conversation with you the entire time I'm there? Like ugh, I just hate when people are consistently pointing out how quiet I am.


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## AxeDroid (Jan 11, 2013)

I've been asked that question before and I tell them yeah. They never bother me again, must be the way I look at them when I say it.


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