# Will I find somebody who fits this description....



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Must not of been popular at school
Must not try to change my appearance
Must not make negative comments on my appearance
Must not use porn
Must not smoke
Must not have had one night stand
Must not be careless about getting me pregnant
Must not talk about other women when I'm there
Must not have done drugs or do drugs
Must not go to strip clubs
Must not cheat
Must not lie
Must not be violent
Must give me lots of praise 
Must not talk about sex life with friends
Must not flirt with other women
Must not have photos of other women on phone (ie celebritys on background wallpaper.)
Must not flirt with other women on facebook


----------



## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

No.


----------



## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

I dont think so.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

which of them are unreasonable my ex bf was only guilty of about 4 of them


----------



## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

Individually, none of them are that unreasonable...but all of them? Even if you found a guy who qualified, who is to say he'd like you? You expect perfection...


----------



## werdiscv (Nov 1, 2011)

"Must not use porn"
LOL, good luck. You may want to rethink that one, in particular.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

that was the reason I dumped him


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I meant must not use porn when they are having a sexuakl realtionship with me


----------



## JFmtl (Dec 23, 2008)

werdiscv said:


> "Must not use porn"
> LOL, good luck. You may want to rethink that one, in particular.


 This one will discriminate likely most single guys.... also... i dont know your age, but if you date lets say a 29 years old guy, does his high school popularity matters? and many of your requirements refers to any point in the past.... if a guy lets say used soft drugs or had a one night stand 10 years ago, is it that important now? People evolve as they age. Also, the more you get old, the older people you date will be, and the more likely these people are likely to have some past and experiences behind them...


----------



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not talk about sex life with friends


LOL. Good luck with that.


----------



## Whatev (Feb 6, 2012)

Yes its possible, just going to be a challenge as you can tell by the others responses.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

JFmtl said:


> This one will discriminate likely most single guys.... also... i dont know your age, but if you date lets say a 29 years old guy, does his high school popularity matters? and many of your requirements refers to any point in the past.... if a guy lets say used soft drugs or had a one night stand 10 years ago, is it that important now? People evolve as they age. Also, the more you get old, the older people you date will be, and the more likely these people are likely to have some past and experiences behind them...


The popular at school might not matter but the one night stand would annoy me


----------



## _AJ_ (Jan 23, 2008)

hey, that describes me 
but im taken


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I knew it was possible


----------



## strugglingforhope (Jun 13, 2009)

I don't see those as unreasonable at all.

I think I see what you mean with the popularity thing, however that's not always going be black and white with what you think it says about a person.

Also, If you expect to get lots of praise, you'd better be giving the same in return.


----------



## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

Hahahahaha


----------



## Neo1234 (Mar 6, 2012)

Well,that's just me !!!


----------



## nemesis1 (Dec 21, 2009)

You've got a better chance of winning the lottery.


----------



## sorrwel (May 20, 2012)

Haha oh man. My boyfriend does more than half those things and he's great. I understand that it's good to have standards, but a lot of those things you're ruling out wouldn't change how good of a boyfriend he is to you.


----------



## The Blues man (Jan 29, 2012)

I can't see why not to be honest, I think most people who have replied so far are being a bit harsh in my opinion.

I tick all the boxes in which you listed so far anyway lol. The only one that I'd remove from the list would be the first one and like someone else mention, if you want lots of praise, you have to be able to return the favour.


----------



## eissejtsuj (Sep 5, 2011)

No you won't.


----------



## J C (Mar 22, 2011)

The Blues man said:


> I can't see why not to be honest, I think most people who have replied so far are being a bit harsh in my opinion.


 I don't see anyone being harsh.

I know people who would fail most of what's on this list of standards (myself being one of them) who still have welcoming personalities, and are generally good people. I would say keep your list, but don't judge a person too quickly if they don't meet all of these rules without getting to know them better first. Also, and maybe this goes without saying, but I wouldn't treat everything on this list with the same amount of caution. But, that's probably just me.


----------



## The Blues man (Jan 29, 2012)

J C said:


> *I don't see anyone being harsh.*
> 
> I know people who would fail most of what's on this list of standards (myself being one of them) who still have welcoming personalities, and are generally good people. I would say keep your list, but don't judge a person too quickly if they don't meet all of these rules without getting to know them better first. Also, and maybe this goes without saying, but I wouldn't treat everything on this list with the same amount of caution. But, that's probably just me.


Fair enough, but she did ask if she'd find somebody who fits this description and there are obviously people in the world who would fit that description and people have straight-out said no or along the same lines as that when clearly that's not the case.

I agree with what you said though, not trying to start anything in case you may pick it up that way.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

The praise thing i can knock off i wouldnt need it if they did the rest.


----------



## GunnyHighway (Sep 28, 2010)

Aye, that'd be me.

Although if it was a LDR, the no porn thing would be pretty hard.


----------



## J C (Mar 22, 2011)

The Blues man said:


> Fair enough, but she did ask if she'd find somebody who fits this description and there are obviously people in the world who would fit that description and people have straight-out said no or along the same lines as that when clearly that's not the case.
> 
> I agree with what you said though, not trying to start anything in case you may pick it up that way.


I agree that those sentiments are untrue, at least. And I don't perceive your reply as hostile.


----------



## identitycrisis (Sep 18, 2011)

Amazingly enough I actually qualify, so it's certainly possible.

That being said, I think your standards are a little high. Finding a guy like this who you're also attracted to and whose personality you like, well, that's going to be one in a million.


----------



## To22 (Apr 6, 2012)

A lot of these are pretty easy and I consider mandatory for a well mannered gentlemen. Others are more about fighting ones body. Porn for instance, do you mean constant porn, occasional porn, or EVER! As in, if you catch him once it's over?! Lying is another thing, EVERYONE LIES, but if you mean often, I understand. 

A better question is, can you commit to being the same way? Don't give him a higher standard than you hold yourself. If you do, your list is automatically unreasonable.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I don't want porn ever unless they are using it to remind them of me in some way.


----------



## To22 (Apr 6, 2012)

Must not of been popular at school - Why does this matter? -_- Stereotyping are we? Or insecurities


Must not try to change my appearance -fair

Must not make negative comments on my appearance - fair

Must not use porn - depends on how stern your limits are..I think finding a guy who doesn't use it at all is very rare but a guy who uses it rarely is fair

Must not smoke - fair

Must not have had one night stand - fair

Must not be careless about getting me pregnant - no comment, that doesn't matter...it's your responsibility also

Must not talk about other women when I'm there - fair

Must not have done drugs or do drugs - fair

Must not go to strip clubs - fair

Must not cheat -fair 

Must not lie - depends on your meaning...if you mean a liar that's fair

Must not be violent - uhhh depends on what you consider violent 

Must give me lots of praise- ? fair..I guess

Must not talk about sex life with friends - fair

Must not flirt with other women - depends on what consider flirting and how much flirting is too much. 

Must not have photos of other women on phone (ie celebritys on background wallpaper.) - fair

Must not flirt with other women on facebook - lol fair


----------



## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

lonelygirl1986 said:


> i don't want porn ever unless they are using it to remind them of me in some way.


ahahahahaahahahahahaha


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I've read about people doing that whilst looking at porn, it is possible. The pregnancy thing what I meant is I don't want someone who will try and convince me to let them not use anything/frivolous views.


----------



## asw12345 (Aug 8, 2012)

why does it matter it the person was popular at school?


----------



## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

I'm pretty sure Lonelygirl1986 is trolling.


----------



## Invisiblehandicap (Jul 31, 2011)

What do you mean must not lie? Everyone lies, including you and you can't deny that.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Okay must now lie unless they really have to. I don't know why but I have a fear of people who were popular at school, most people who were popular were bullies.


----------



## godhelpme2 (Apr 4, 2012)

it'll be rare to find a guy with ALL of those qualities.

but some of your requests are judging a guy by his past. So what if he had a one night stand? That doesn't _usually_ define who they are..


----------



## asw12345 (Aug 8, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Okay must now lie unless they really have to. I don't know why but I have a fear of people who were popular at school, most people who were popular were bullies.


i was pretty popular at school. mainly due to the fact i had a brother and sister in the same grade as me. we aren't all bad people.


----------



## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Okay must now lie unless they really have to. I don't know why but I have a fear of people who were popular at school, most people who were popular were bullies.


That's news to me...

By the way, how about working on your own insecurities instead of looking for a guy who fits some impossible mold?


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

rymo said:


> That's news to me...
> 
> By the way, how about working on your own insecurities instead of looking for a guy who fits some impossible mold?


That would be the rational thing to do but it wouldn't work.


----------



## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> That would be the rational thing to do but it wouldn't work.


Not with that attitude, certainly.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

My first boyfriend was a porn addict who shoved it in my face it might be something to do with that but I'm not sure. He had pictures on his phone, including one on his phone background. I saw a picture on there of a womans bum that he took in the street. He bought a clip in that he downloaded off the internet and played it on the college computers infront of me and everybody. He would go on about the good film he watched last night, talked about other women within earshot. All he said was you can look but you can't touch.


----------



## elvin jones (Dec 12, 2011)

I knew a few people that fit under that category. They were mormon though.


----------



## sorrwel (May 20, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> My first boyfriend was a porn addict who shoved it in my face it might be something to do with that but I'm not sure. He had pictures on his phone, including one on his phone background. I saw a picture on there of a womans bum that he took in the street. He bought a clip in that he downloaded off the internet and played it on the college computers infront of me and everybody. He would go on about the good film he watched last night, talked about other women within earshot. All he said was you can look but you can't touch.


Well there's a difference between porn addiction and a guy just looking at it in private a couple times a week.


----------



## Celtics777 (Aug 25, 2012)

I fit this description except for:

*Must not use porn* Almost everybody, guy and girl has used porn.

*Must not smoke* I hate cigarettes, but I have recently gotten into smoking Hookah with a friend.

*Must not talk about other women when I'm there* It depends on what you mean by "talk about," I'd want to be able to feel comfortable saying anything to the person I'm in a relationship with.

*Must give me lots of praise* This is a tad needy. I would give praise, but to much could be "creepy".

Other than the ones I listed I qualify. However, I think these are asking for a lot.


----------



## Celtics777 (Aug 25, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> My first boyfriend was a porn addict who shoved it in my face it might be something to do with that but I'm not sure. He had pictures on his phone, including one on his phone background. I saw a picture on there of a womans bum that he took in the street. He bought a clip in that he downloaded off the internet and played it on the college computers infront of me and everybody. He would go on about the good film he watched last night, talked about other women within earshot. All he said was you can look but you can't touch.


Addiction to porn is a whole different story. The way I took the OP is that you don't even want someone to occasionally look at porn. People are curious.


----------



## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> My first boyfriend was a porn addict who shoved it in my face it might be something to do with that but I'm not sure. He had pictures on his phone, including one on his phone background. I saw a picture on there of a womans bum that he took in the street. He bought a clip in that he downloaded off the internet and played it on the college computers infront of me and everybody. He would go on about the good film he watched last night, talked about other women within earshot. All he said was you can look but you can't touch.


So you're taking the actions of one guy and condemning others because of it. It's like if your last boyfriend was an alcoholic and now you will never date anyone who even drinks a sip of alcohol. The difference being, you're especially sensitive to the porn thing because of the insecurity that those women are better than you in some way. Don't let that insecurity define you like that. Overcome it, and realize that not every guy is a complete and utter porn addict.


----------



## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not of been popular at school
> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not use porn
> ...


lol, :clap


----------



## Ventura (May 5, 2009)

Uhh yeah, that reads more like a grocery list. You might have better luck if you didn't focus so much on what you DON'T want! I mean come on!

Are you really going to judge someone on ALL of that? I agree some of it might be valid - lets go through the list, shell we-

I'll list the "understandable/ reasonable requests" I see. Some things that might be a "for fit" or take with the 'package', and an unreasonable list. (As I see it)

-----------------------
Understandable -

* Must not try to change my appearance <----- Understandable.
* Must not make negative comments on my appearance <--- understandable, unless your wearing something 4 sizes to small, well on your boated time on the month and want to say; 'does this outfit make me look big'


*Must not cheat 
- Must not flirt with other women
- Must not flirt with other women on facebook
- Must not go to strip clubs

Must not lie
Must not be violent

^ All things very understandable, and you should not have to give in with this list (above)

------------------------------------------

"for fit" (things that you might have to give/ take)

* Must not have done drugs or do drugs <---- Don't judge on what someone has done in the past (ect, meaning if it's been over 3 yrs) 

* Must not use porn <--- understandably (depending on the age) dunno, this should just depend.

* Must not smoke <---- you can find guys who don't smoke, but turning against it, should not be a deal breaker.

* Must not have had one night stand <---- Ever? :lol that blows your chances to just about errrrr, 

* Must give me lots of praise- give and take section, do you want him to pat you on the head, too? :stu 

-----------------------------------------

Unreasonable-

* Must not talk about sex life with friends - All guys have times they have 'boy talk' like all girls have 'girl talk' about stuff. It is bound to come up. 
Unreasonable-

Must not of been popular at school <----- *Why not? *Don't want someone who did better in social status?


* Must not be careless about getting me pregnant <--- That takes TWO to be careless about something, it's not the guys fault if you get knocked up. There are things such as birth control, and other items, to use. The over all mindset of this is um-reasonable.

* Must not talk about other women when I'm there <-- Depending on what you mean by this, sounds a bit controlling imo.

*Must not have photos of other women on phone (ie celebritys on background wallpaper.) --- again a bit controlling 


...... Your going to pass up a bunch of great guys with the list your asking. I just think you should rethink your propriety.


----------



## luceo (Jan 29, 2011)

A lot of your criteria seem to be to compensate for your own insecurities (needing lots of constant praise etc). Also I'm sensing MAJOR trust issues with the whole 'no porn, no sex talk, no flirting'. Rather than looking for an impossible person, you're far better off learning to deal with those insecurities. Trust me, it will be far easier to work on yourself than to find someone who matches all of this criteria _and_ is romantically compatible with you.


----------



## Invisiblehandicap (Jul 31, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> My first boyfriend was a porn addict who shoved it in my face it might be something to do with that but I'm not sure. He had pictures on his phone, including one on his phone background. I saw a picture on there of a womans bum that he took in the street. He bought a clip in that he downloaded off the internet and played it on the college computers infront of me and everybody. He would go on about the good film he watched last night, talked about other women within earshot. All he said was you can look but you can't touch.


Just eww. I think the word tool is very appropriate here...

I can see you are saying things like "no porn" because you don't want a repeat of that...But watching porn does not turn you into that. That guy just happened to watch porn, like most guys.


----------



## gintoniclime41 (Sep 8, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not of been popular at school
> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not use porn
> ...


Wow! Just get a puppy...

Seriously, you cannot have that high of standards. Try knocking at least 5 of those requirements off your list and you may find someone who makes you happy.

Good luck in your search!


----------



## iBlaze (Nov 1, 2011)

If you can get over me smoking a fat blunt, then I'm pretty much your dude.


----------



## ManOfFewWords (Mar 20, 2012)

I am not this guy. Not even close.


----------



## lonelyjew (Jan 20, 2010)

I hope you're super hot and/or super rich, because even on the off chance you find a guy who fits these criteria, you'de better have something that attracts them enough to ignore the crazy insecure, demanding, and judgemental person you come off as. That, or I hope you learn to enjoy being lonely.


----------



## Tania I (Jul 22, 2012)

I know many people who fits those descriptions.
All of them are girls though.
There are few boys under 15, but idk if it counts.


----------



## Reclus (Jan 11, 2012)

Lord NO! Goodness gracious, even Moses only had 10 Commandments....


----------



## caveman8 (Sep 3, 2012)

Celtics777 said:


> *Must give me lots of praise* This is a tad needy .


Yeah, and it would probably turn her off him eventually, because she would start to see him as the needy one.


----------



## Solomon's Tomb (Aug 14, 2012)

Well, I was on the bandwagon until you wrote "Must not smoke." Sorry, if I have to choose love or cigarettes... I choose cigarettes. They never say 'no.' Or 'leave the toilet seat down.'


----------



## JGreenwood (Jan 28, 2011)

Can we say high maintenance?? I don't smoke....rest of these disqualifies me.


----------



## Droidsteel (Mar 22, 2012)

The porn one? Good luck.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Must not try to change my appearance
Must not make negative comments on my appearance
Must not use porn (Unless they are looking at people to remind them of me, mildly acceptable)
Must not smoke
Must not have had one night stand
Must not be careless about getting me pregnant
Must not talk about other women in a sexual manner when I'm there
Must not have done drugs or do drugs
Must not go to strip clubs
Must not lie (unless they really have to)
Must not flirt with other women (mainly where I can see ie. facebook)
Must not have photos of other women on phone (ie glamour models, celebritys)
Must not have paid for sex
I've changed the rules a bit and took some obvious ones off


----------



## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

Well that's a little better. The only one I can slightly disagree with is having a one night stand...the past is the past, it's best to leave it there.


----------



## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

That's me.


----------



## Celtics777 (Aug 25, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not use porn (Unless they are looking at people to remind them of me, mildly acceptable)
> Must not smoke
> ...


We're making progress, but only slightly.

If I was to look at porn for the purpose of reminding me of someone I was in a relationship with.. Then either our relationship has a very poor sex life, or I am just flat out creepy.. Either way.. Lol.

What about simple harmless lies? Like santa bringing gifts on christmas? You won't have a relationship with someone unless they completely screw over an innocent child by ruining christmas?!

Must not flirt with other women. (infront of me like on facebook) I don't know what to say about this one. I wouldn't like someone flirting with other guys behind my back.. However, everyone seems to have a different definition of "flirting". Guys tend to think a girl is flirting with them when in reality the girl is only being nice and/or having fun.

Must not have paid for sex. Agreed.


----------



## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not use porn


Only if he is blind. Even then guys like to listen.

You need a blind eunuch. There probably are a few out there somewhere.


----------



## EmilyDickinson (Sep 10, 2012)

*: )*

someone said "you'd better have something that attracts them enough to ignore the crazy insecure, demanding, and judgemental person you come off as." I totally understand you. I'd just knock off the popularity in high school thing and forgive him for a one nite stand and try not to think about it. I know youre not crazy insecure demanding or judgemental. Maybe insecure but thats not a bad thing. and not the whole reasoning for your list of perfection. being crazy is okay too. I don't see what's so hard about someone abiding to your list of rules and I think you deserve them. If he smokes make him quit.


----------



## EmilyDickinson (Sep 10, 2012)

*p.s.*

having done drugs in the past isnt that big of a deal
doing them now mite be.
i like your list.


----------



## oceanlife (Aug 20, 2012)

Talk about being judgmental! That's a pretty pathetic list of reasons to avoid dating someone.


----------



## oceanlife (Aug 20, 2012)

scarpia said:


> Only if he is blind. Even then guys like to listen.
> 
> You need a blind eunuch. There probably are a few out there somewhere.


I'm sure she'll be able to find a great liar!


----------



## Dane (Jul 27, 2009)

I pretty much fit the description, but I'm older than most of you guys.


----------



## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

Not having photos of women on his phone is a strange one. 

Do guys typically have celebrity women all over their phones?


----------



## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

scarpia said:


> Only if he is blind. Even then guys like to listen.
> 
> You need a blind eunuch. There probably are a few out there somewhere.


There's tons of guys that don't watch porn. They live in the jungles with no electricity. We know any guy with internet access eventually watches porn. Whether its on the phone, school, library, wifi, ect..


----------



## Haunty (Oct 24, 2008)

I'm sure it's possible. I only fail with 2 of them


----------



## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

oceanlife said:


> Talk about being judgmental! That's a pretty pathetic list of reasons to avoid dating someone.


The below seems pretty reasonable, actually..:?



Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not talk about other women in a sexual manner when I'm there
> Must not go to strip clubs
> ...


If a guy did these things while in a relationship, he'd be a jerk.


----------



## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

You will never find another human being on the face of this earth that fully fits that description. Not even yourself.


----------



## low (Sep 27, 2009)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must give me lots of praise


Praise is subjective. If you are deserving of praise you would get it. I just find a lot of women want guys to compliment them constantly for superficial things and it seems to me to be a narcissist trait, which I don't like, personally.


----------



## GoodTurtle (Jun 24, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not of been popular at school
> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not use porn
> ...


I hope so, his name is Jesus Christ.


----------



## Raphael200 (Aug 18, 2012)

Such a guy does exist,i personally know him,but he does not likely date anyone.U have to be a christian and very friendly,that's all he requires.Want to meet him?


PS:It's not me.It's a friend.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

The no drugs, smoking and porn are the main ones for me  shame my last bf watched porn during our relationship. He seemed to think he treated me with respect but he watched porn so he didn't, i don't care what any of you say. He claimed he was thinking of me whilst he was but i doubt it.


----------



## lonelyjew (Jan 20, 2010)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> The no drugs, smoking and porn are the main ones for me  shame my last bf watched porn during our relationship. He seemed to think he treated me with respect but he watched porn so he didn't, i don't care what any of you say. He claimed he was thinking of me whilst he was but i doubt it.


I think you need to stop blaming your last boyfriend for your own problems.



Lonelygirl1986 said:


> I was so hurt when i found out my boyfriend was using it, i thought i was the only one he was looking at. *I managed to get him to delete his collection he had been collecting for 20 years, even though he stopped doing it i was still so hurt i dumped him.*





Lonelygirl1986 said:


> It is the truth, all gone 463 gb all gone. *By the way he made an effort, he bought alot, drove me places etc but when I found out he had been using porn i was livid he didn't make enough effort in my eyes.*


Honestly, I'm pretty disgusted by *your* behavior in this. This guy apparently willingly deleted all of his massive porn collection for you after he found out how much it bothered you, apparently agreed to stop looking at porn altogether, and then he went out of his way to be nice to you to show you that he cared about your feelings, and even that wasn't good enough? What the hell would have been enough of an effort? And after all that, after he demonstrated that he'd accomodate *your demands*, even at personal cost to himself, he's the disrespectful one? :no

Seriously, good luck with your future relationships, because I'm sure that even if you find your perfect mister wonderful, who's willing to put up with your unreasonable needs and expectations, you'll still probably manage to find a reason to decide that he's not good enough, and that even though he tried his best, he apparently wasn't "respectful" or good enough for you. :roll


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I know but that guys gone now I can't get him back but i still got a feeling from him that he found me ordinary and had to force himself to find me more attractive physically.


----------



## lonelyjew (Jan 20, 2010)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> I know but that guys gone now I can't get him back but i still got a feeling from him that he found me ordinary and had to force himself to find me more attractive physically.


Look, I was actually going to just delete that post now before you saw it because, even if that's what I think about this, the way I presented it was in a negative and unhelpfull manner. Oh well. Anyways, I have to head to bed, but I will say that you need to face reality and realize that there are more beautiful women out there than you and that it is completely unrealistic to expect your boyfriend to honestly believe you are the single most beautiful women in the world. It is also unhealthy and unrealistic to demand your boyfriend to actively feed and enable this denial as well, under threat of you ending the relationship.


----------



## GameGuy (Oct 5, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not of been popular at school
> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not use porn
> ...


Honestly... I meet those requirements. All but one. I have photos of women. But, once I find the right woman for me, all those photos will be thrown away. And, I do lie, but only if it's about getting a gift for a birthday or christmas. Anything else, and I'll tell the truth even if I know I'll get into trouble.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

lonelyjew said:


> Look, I was actually going to just delete that post now before you saw it because, even if that's what I think about this, the way I presented it was in a negative and unhelpfull manner. Oh well. Anyways, I have to head to bed, but I will say that you need to face reality and realize that there are more beautiful women out there than you and that it is completely unrealistic to expect your boyfriend to honestly believe you are the single most beautiful women in the world. It is also unhealthy and unrealistic to demand your boyfriend to actively feed and enable this denial as well, under threat of you ending the relationship.


Finding them attractive is fine but not jerking to their pics


----------



## leave me alone (Apr 1, 2011)

Lol, nice list. Atleast you're upfront about it.

I meet most of the requirements, but I still wouldn't qualify. I've done soft drugs in the past and I watch porn (don't think I'd have a need for this if I was in relationship though). Anyway, I don't think I could be with someone who's so uptight about those things.


----------



## Amorphousanomaly (Jun 20, 2012)

You might be leaving out some worthwhile individuals by narrowing your dating pool so much.


----------



## Celtics777 (Aug 25, 2012)

VickieKitties said:


> You might be leaving out some worthwhile individuals by narrowing your dating pool so much.


My thoughts exactly.


----------



## Raphael200 (Aug 18, 2012)

Some of these stuff cannot be avoided by guys,it should not bother u either,learn to forgive what happened in the past and accept that all men are sinners.

PS:I'm a sinner myself sometimes.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I can't feel special knowing he used porn.


----------



## Durzo (Jun 4, 2011)

Reclus said:


> Lord NO! Goodness gracious, even Moses only had 10 Commandments....


haha


----------



## caveman8 (Sep 3, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Finding them attractive is fine but not jerking to their pics


The reality is most guys will jerk thinking of other women sometimes, not necessarily to a pic but while thinking of them, whether in a relationship or not. Finding one who doesn't would be pretty rare.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

caveman8 said:


> The reality is most guys will jerk thinking of other women sometimes, not necessarily to a pic but while thinking of them, whether in a relationship or not. Finding one who doesn't would be pretty rare.


Thinking in their mind isn't too bad. It's more mild than looking at porn.


----------



## caveman8 (Sep 3, 2012)

Gotcha.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Rola said:


> Yes they exist.
> 
> When someone loves you they'd pretty much do anything for you as long as it doesn't affect them negatively.
> 
> I don't see what's wrong with watching porn though, or the popularity part.


Because they are getting off on someone else


----------



## mattigummi (Aug 26, 2012)

Lol that pretty much describes me except for the porn, but I think I could stop if I'd get a girlfriend.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Yes i meant when they are dating me.


----------



## sociallyawkward85 (Aug 7, 2011)

must not lie, everyone lies every now and then


----------



## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

Drugs are nice. **** are okay. Porn is depressing, though. Exact for that one clip I saw today. If only my girl knew what I was getting into. It is illegal in 47 states.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Nice checklist. Are you 100% without faults or vices?


----------



## youngloc (Dec 23, 2009)

as unrealistic your list is, mine is worse


----------



## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

My list (which I post every chance I get, trying to attract a mate):

-bowling shoes
-big hair
-missing lower left molar
-saran wrap, just because
-soft hands (okay if extra finger, but not minus one)
-pale blue eyes, which are actually brown
-retro mod wrapped in a flapper
-fluffer, occupation


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Mercurochrome said:


> My list (which I post every chance I get, trying to attract a mate):
> 
> -bowling shoes
> -big hair
> ...


LOL, got another one for my list "must not have cheated in a previous relationship"


----------



## Schizoidas (May 11, 2012)

rdrr said:


> Nice checklist. Are you 100% without faults or vices?


Yeh, you're going to have to answer this first, lonelygirl1986. What exactly do you bring to a relationship? or do you just take and take and take and take and take and take and never give??


----------



## caveman8 (Sep 3, 2012)

Schizoidas said:


> Yeh, you're going to have to answer this first, lonelygirl1986. What exactly do you bring to a relationship? or do you just take and take and take and take and take and take and never give??


Not pointing to anyone in particular, but this is a good point. You always hear about "what she wants" when it comes to relationships but not the other way around, and a lot of women out there have expectations that they would be hard pressed to meet themselves.


----------



## LoneLioness (Nov 16, 2003)

I had an even longer requirement list and I'm with my soulmate (moving in together in a couple weeks). So yes, yes you will and don't lower your standards ever. The key to a successful relationship is having both similar histories and common interests, don't let anyone tell you any different.


----------



## LoneLioness (Nov 16, 2003)

Wow some of these replies are downright rude. It may be hard for her to find all of what she wants but that doesn't mean she can't. I don't know how old she is but it took me till I was 27 to meet someone and as I said in my previous post I had an even longer requirement list. As far as asking her if she's without faults or vices as long as they aren't the things she's wanting a mate to not have I don't see the problem. Eveyone does have faults or vices, but not everyone has the same ones, she is well within her rights to not want a guy who views porn if she herself doesn't view it. Now she may very well be ruling out many good guys for a relationship but you can be the greatest person in the world and still incompatible with someone. Only she can decide whats compatible with her and going to make her happy, no one else.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

My ex was almost perfect, he was using porn at the beginning (a shock actually) but he did give it up. He won't have me back from what I gather.


----------



## Neo1234 (Mar 6, 2012)

LoneLioness said:


> Wow some of these replies are downright rude. It may be hard for her to find all of what she wants but that doesn't mean she can't. I don't know how old she is but it took me till I was 27 to meet someone and as I said in my previous post I had an even longer requirement list. As far as asking her if she's without faults or vices as long as they aren't the things she's wanting a mate to not have I don't see the problem. Eveyone does have faults or vices, but not everyone has the same ones, she is well within her rights to not want a guy who views porn if she herself doesn't view it. Now she may very well be ruling out many good guys for a relationship but you can be the greatest person in the world and still incompatible with someone. Only she can decide whats compatible with her and going to make her happy, no one else.


+1


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

I think your list is way too long and nit-picky. If they're must-haves anyway.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I will never understand why my ex didn't think he was doing anything wrong when he was using porn, I thought it would of been obvious, he was one of the most decent blokes ever it still confuses me.


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

Did you have a healthy sex life?


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

.


----------



## Durzo (Jun 4, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> No lol he had ed and delayed ejaculation from masturbating so much.


Just wondering, but how did you two approach helping this ED/DE? Because these issues do not just resolve themselves usually. I am assuming that he had no problem ejaculating via porn?

I highly doubt asking him to stop watching porn completely is the best approach to solving it.... and its more than likely watching porn together and then slowly doing things to fade it out would have been the best solution, there would have been many ways to do this. But of course your hate for porn and his need for it probably made you incompatible to begin with, even when he compromised you still broke up.

As for your list, I think most of them are reasonable, besides a few. You may find someone that fits the list perfectly, but then again you probably will not. In a few years time I would like to see your list again and see if it is the same. The porn one is the main offender here as being unreasonable. Unless you are willing to have sex every time he wants, he has a right to satisfy his needs visually, just like you are. Why make something so harmless forbidden? As many have said here porn is just a catalyst and it is mostly the acts that people find a turn on.


----------



## T-Bone (Oct 1, 2010)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> which of them are unreasonable my ex bf was only guilty of about 4 of them


The unreasonable ones deal with people's pasts. Using drugs for exmaple. If they're not using now, why the hell would you care? I am not a worse person because i used heroin for years an then quit, i am a better/stronger person thank ya very much!


----------



## Freiheit (Dec 8, 2008)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not of been popular at school
> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not use porn
> ...


Sounds like my dream person. They don't exist.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

It's pointless talking about him now his feelings for me have gone. It's been 5 weeks since he loved me i think, i don't know. If he thought i knew he was using porn he didn't do anything wrong. There was one time when he said for the times when you arent here at the start, i ignored it, dont know why he said it i come to realise he was talking about porn later.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Durzo said:


> Just wondering, but how did you two approach helping this ED/DE? Because these issues do not just resolve themselves usually. I am assuming that he had no problem ejaculating via porn?
> 
> I highly doubt asking him to stop watching porn completely is the best approach to solving it.... and its more than likely watching porn together and then slowly doing things to fade it out would have been the best solution, there would have been many ways to do this. But of course your hate for porn and his need for it probably made you incompatible to begin with, even when he compromised you still broke up.
> 
> As for your list, I think most of them are reasonable, besides a few. You may find someone that fits the list perfectly, but then again you probably will not. In a few years time I would like to see your list again and see if it is the same. The porn one is the main offender here as being unreasonable. Unless you are willing to have sex every time he wants, he has a right to satisfy his needs visually, just like you are. Why make something so harmless forbidden? As many have said here porn is just a catalyst and it is mostly the acts that people find a turn on.


He was masturbating over their body parts not just the act thats what i hate.


----------



## Leumak (Sep 13, 2012)

better love story than twilight, no, just kidding, is not better.. But nice list.


----------



## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Wow, people have actual lists. :um


----------



## pinkempyreal (Aug 9, 2012)

You can't throw people into categories and then line them up with a list of expectations. Keep on this track and you will never ever find someone whom you are happy with.


----------



## Ohhai (Oct 15, 2010)

What a wonderful idea to make a list;


Must have a hole
Must be interesting in some way
Will I ever find someone?


----------



## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Ohhai said:


> What a wonderful idea to make a list;
> 
> 
> Must have a hole
> ...


No. Your requirements are too rigid.


----------



## LoneLioness (Nov 16, 2003)

Mimic said:


> You were extremely lucky. Sure, she may win the lottery and find her dream man like you have apparently done, but if she doesn't lower her standards a bit then she will most likely die alone.
> 
> Plus, I'll bet you anything that your "soulmate" doesn't fit every requirement on your list. I'm sure he has to lie about a few of them.


I was lucky in a way because I was only looking for friends when I met him. However I'm pretty picky with my friends too. I had made an effort to find friends with a post on here when he contacted me, so it wasn't just by chance that we met.

If she is willing to put the effort into seeking this person out, she certainly has a chance at meeting them. Other then the no porn rule that list is very reasonable. It may take her years to find it (only because decent men are few and hard to find) , but its worth the wait. If I had listened to everyone here's advise I'd possibly have met someone before my boyfriend and be in an unhappy relationship with someone who either didn't understand me or have things in common with me.

I find it funny how people can't accept that someone could have a lot of requirements and still find someone who fits it, and automatically assume their S/O must be lying, it's pretty lame, honestly. But anyway, no my boyfriend doesn't lie he's the most honest person I know. He's definatly not lying about the required things I wanted in a mate...he's a member on this forum (doesn't come here much anymore) so I know this from past posts of his as well as knowing his character very well from the 3 years we've been together.


----------



## Ohhai (Oct 15, 2010)

diamondheart89 said:


> No. Your requirements are too rigid.



Must have a hole
Must be living (optional)

Better?


----------



## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Ohhai said:


> Must have a hole
> Must be living (optional)
> 
> Better?


Nope. Way outta your league.


----------



## Ohhai (Oct 15, 2010)

diamondheart89 said:


> Nope. Way outta your league.


No Diamond, I will not lower my standards to your level, geez some people.


----------



## Invisiblehandicap (Jul 31, 2011)

Ohhai said:


> Must have a hole
> Must be living (optional)
> 
> Better?


 :roll That fits literally 0.005% of women. Try lowering it a bit.


----------



## VC132 (Sep 1, 2010)

i used to not care, but i've learned that it's okay prefer women with certain qualities.


----------



## MaxPower (May 1, 2012)

Ohhai said:


> Must have a hole
> Must be living (optional)
> 
> Better?


very picky.:no



godhelpme2 said:


> it'll be rare to find a guy with ALL of those qualities.


ooo, I'm a rare find, ego boost in 3... 2... 1...


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Why is the no porn so inreasonable? If the sex life is healthy and regular, then what is the need?


----------



## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Ohhai said:


> No Diamond, I will not lower my standards to your level, geez some people.


I think by "lower" you mean elevate beyond reason. Jeez, some nurds.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

My ex was nearly perfect, he was so nice to me then i found out he was masturbating to pictures of other people, i just want to know why he didnt feel bad or feel like he was doing something wrong towards me.


----------



## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> My ex was nearly perfect, he was so nice to me then i found out he was masturbating to pictures of other people, i just want to know why he didnt feel bad or feel like he was doing something wrong towards me.


Okay come off of it.

This absolutely *has* to be a troll.

I'm going to read this whole thread on somethingawful in a couple days aren't I?


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Why do you think im trolling if you knew the guy youd be surprised aswell.


----------



## jsgt (Jun 26, 2011)

Canucklehead said:


> Okay come off of it.
> 
> This absolutely *has* to be a troll.
> 
> I'm going to read this whole thread on somethingawful in a couple days aren't I?


Wow, is somethingawful still around? I hadn't been there in ages!

Yeah OP, this is getting a bit ridiculous. Several people have already explained why men masturbate to porn(while in a relationship), but you still don't understand. I won't even bother echoing what's been said...other than to say that you're falling victim to your own insecurities. Yep, that's right. *YOU* have the problem, not him...so stop pointing the finger. Work on your self esteem and confidence...and you might find that you won't feel inclined to dump a perfectly good man(according to you) over something as trivial as jacking off to porn. :no


----------



## Invisiblehandicap (Jul 31, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> My ex was nearly perfect, he was so nice to me then i found out he was masturbating to pictures of other people, i just want to know why he didnt feel bad or feel like he was doing something wrong towards me.


Maybe you should try watching and enjoying porn yourself, so that you can get rid of the no porn thing.


----------



## MaxPower (May 1, 2012)

jsgt said:


> Several people have already explained why *[some]* men masturbate to porn(while in a relationship)...


I fixed that for you, I'm not defending the OP but I don't see the point of using porn in a relationship,:stu don't people have sex in relationships nowadays?


----------



## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not use porn
> Must not have had one night stand
> Must not talk about other women when I'm there
> Must not have done drugs or do drugs
> ...


HAHA seriously? Go date a monk, priest, or a robot :roll


----------



## jsgt (Jun 26, 2011)

MaxPower said:


> I fixed that for you, I'm not defending the OP but I don't see the point of using porn in a relationship,:stu don't people have sex in relationships nowadays?


Too bad you banned yourself because you might fit her criteria of the perfect man.  Of course people have sex(I know you were being sarcastic, but to make a point), but there are different levels of satisfaction for _some_ of us, and we need a different activity to full fill each of those. It might be the actual act, it might be watching, it might be fantasizing, ect..


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Well i still believe it meant i wasn't good enougj.


----------



## i just want luv (Feb 13, 2011)

its possible more unlikely. 
take a few off and it opens more


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I can't they are all important requirements.


----------



## Gryffindor85 (Nov 7, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not use porn
> Must not have had one night stand
> Must not talk about other women when I'm there
> Must not have photos of other women on phone (ie celebritys on background wallpaper.)





One thing I think is bad is that you are judging people on past experiences. I would fit your description if it wasn't for the four things your quoting.

I'm sorry, but dating a girl who is going to likely dump me is not going to make me give up my celebrity crush and porn. I can't help being attracted to other women, all that matters as far as that is concerned is that I don't cheat with anyone.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Most of them i meant whilst they have entered the relationship


----------



## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

*Must not of been popular at school*
I don't see why this would be on your list, but certainly you could find tons of guys who weren't popular in HS.

*Must not try to change my appearance
Must not make negative comments on my appearance*
Definitely could, and should. A guy who does either of these is not worth your time.

*Must not use porn*
Good luck with this one. I doubt it.

*Must not smoke
Must not have had one night stand*
These two are possible. I don't see how they're telling of a person, though.

*Must not be careless about getting me pregnant*
Jesus Christ, who have you been dating? If a guy was ever careless like this he must've been pure ****.

*Must not talk about other women when I'm there*
If it bothers you and you let him know, I don't see how he wouldn't be able to not do so.

*Must not have done drugs or do drugs*
If he experimented once, what's the big deal? The past is the past.

*Must not go to strip clubs
Must not cheat
Must not lie
Must not be violent
Must give me lots of praise*
All possible.

*Must not talk about sex life with friends*
Why not? You probably will, too. Sometimes people need advice. It all depends on what he talks about, though...

*Must not flirt with other women
Must not have photos of other women on phone (ie celebritys on background wallpaper.)
Must not flirt with other women on facebook*
Possible, but as long as he doesn't do anything and is still devoted to you I don't know how pictures and superficial flirting is so problematic.

You're not going to find a perfect man because there is no such thing. You're also not perfect, so you should shorten your list unless you're okay with spending your life single.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Must not try to change my appearance
Must not make negative comments on my appearance
Must not use porn (whilst in a sexual relationship with me, exceptions - if they haven't seen me in a while)
Must not smoke
Must not have had casual sex flings
Must not have frivolous views on birth control
Must not talk about other women in a sexual manner when I'm there
Must not have done drugs or do drugs
Must not go to strip clubs (whilst in the relationship with me)
Must not lie (unless they really have to)
Must not flirt with other women (mainly where I can see ie. facebook)
Must not have photos of other women on phone (ie glamour models, celebritys) (whilst in a relationship with me)
Must not have paid for sex
Must not have had underage sex
Must not have cheated in a previous relationship
There must be someone in the world who fits this list, my ex was close but does not want me anymore I'm lead to believe.


----------



## youngloc (Dec 23, 2009)

you gonna keep the name lonely girl for a long time I can assure you that.


----------



## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

AllToAll said:


> You're not going to find a perfect man because there is no such thing. You're also not perfect, so you should shorten your list unless you're okay with spending your life single.


This.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Can somebody explain to me fully why the no porn rule is so unreasonable and not likely to happen?


----------



## Gryffindor85 (Nov 7, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Can somebody explain to me fully why the no porn rule is so unreasonable and not likely to happen?


Because a real sex life is not a replacement for porn.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Gryffindor85 said:


> Because a real sex life is not a replacement for porn.


Elaborate, I have heard of people losing interest in porn once they've become more emotionally involved.


----------



## Gryffindor85 (Nov 7, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Elaborate, I have heard of people losing interest in porn once they've become more emotionally involved.


Porn s a way for people to relieve their sexual desires without cheating on someone else. What would you rather have: a guy who cheats but doesn't look at porn, or a guy who maintains his sanity and faithfulness by looking at porn.

Plus, in porn, you can watch things that would be very hard to do in real life safely. Maybe you want to watch a 5 man cream pie gangbang, can be fun in porn, not so much in real life.

Plus, people like me refuse to get emotionally involved anymore with people from real life, not worth the pain.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Gryffindor85 said:


> Porn s a way for people to relieve their sexual desires without cheating on someone else. What would you rather have: a guy who cheats but doesn't look at porn, or a guy who maintains his sanity and faithfulness by looking at porn.
> 
> Plus, in porn, you can watch things that would be very hard to do in real life safely. Maybe you want to watch a 5 man cream pie gangbang, can be fun in porn, not so much in real life.
> 
> Plus, people like me refuse to get emotionally involved anymore with people from real life, not worth the pain.


I must be confused, I thought it was because they wanted a quick orgasm for when the girlfriend isn't there.


----------



## Invisiblehandicap (Jul 31, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Elaborate, I have heard of people losing interest in porn once they've become more emotionally involved.


Do women stop reading romance novels once they are in a relationship? I don't see how porn is worse than this.


----------



## Gryffindor85 (Nov 7, 2011)

Invisiblehandicap said:


> Do women stop reading romance novels once they are in a relationship? I don't see how porn is worse than this.


Romance novels are porn for women.


----------



## youngloc (Dec 23, 2009)

hate or love porn, it's still just a form of entertainment. It's no different than watching a movie or a tv show and I think that's what you and others doesn't seem to get. You over blow it's importance to a relationship because the people are naked and having intercourse. Somehow you think it's related to you. It's no different than liking video games, technology. It's simply something that people enjoy. 

There is a huge different between a porn addict and someone who enjoy porn


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

He wasn't just watching though.....  if he was happy with me why would he still be interested?


----------



## youngloc (Dec 23, 2009)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> He wasn't just watching though.....  if he was happy with me why would he still be interested?


Porn isn't just for seeing naked girls it's also a way to relax or have a good time or to pass time. Like I said it's an activity, but you see it as a personal attack against you. I'm sorry you feel that way, but it's really just that. If porn becomes more important than the relationship than this is a problem


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

But it is an attack though


----------



## ManOfFewWords (Mar 20, 2012)

No way. This thread is still active?


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

And it wasn't just videos it was pictures of women on their own so i can't just blame it on the actions.


----------



## General Specific (Mar 4, 2008)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> He wasn't just watching though.....  if he was happy with me why would he still be interested?


I'm sure your boyfriend is perfectly happy with you, however you can't always be there to 'please' him when he has his urges.


----------



## youngloc (Dec 23, 2009)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> But it is an attack though


as is it an attack?


----------



## pancakepowder (Jul 9, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not of been popular at school
> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not use porn
> ...


my boyfriend basically fits in these rules. I honestly don't think he interacts with many other women besides me and his mom so there really isn't anyone else for him to talk about or flirt with. I'm sure he watched porn before we started dating but he told me once he doesn't need to watch porn anymore now that hes got me, but I wouldn't care if he did... I know I still do it all the time if we're not together haha ;P and he always reminds me to take my birth control pills because I'm the one usually forgetting, so I guess he's not careless about that XD


----------



## xxguitarplayinxx (May 21, 2010)

I fit the description, but I have a list:

• must not be controlling
• must not use vibrator
• must take birth control
• must have sex regularly
• must not talk about me to your mother
• must not emotionally cheat
• must not get drunk alone with other guy(s)
• must not poop


----------



## Howlett (Aug 29, 2012)

Lonelygirl's standards are too high.


----------



## youngloc (Dec 23, 2009)

xxguitarplayinxx said:


> I fit the description, but I have a list:
> 
> • must not be controlling
> • must not use vibrator
> ...


this. I would never date a girl that does that, especially in the toilet


----------



## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

the cheat said:


> Individually, none of them are that unreasonable...but all of them? Even if you found a guy who qualified, who is to say he'd like you? You expect perfection...


Must not "of" been popular in high school isn't unreasonable?


----------



## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

Peter Attis said:


> Must not "of" been popular in high school isn't unreasonable?


It's a little unreasonable lol, but not that much. I'm guessing the OP had bad experiences with the popular people in high school and doesn't want to date someone who might remind her of that...again, just a guess.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

With the last guy the porn may have been a problem because im convinced he didnt find me that physically attractive.


----------



## lilyamongthorns (Aug 13, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Must not of been popular at school
> Must not try to change my appearance
> Must not make negative comments on my appearance
> Must not use porn
> ...


Yes. I know a few guys at my church who fit this description perfectly.


----------



## googleamiable (Jun 5, 2009)

what happened to the human species


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

My updated rules are on page 8


----------



## MaxPower (May 1, 2012)

jsgt said:


> ...you banned yourself...


You wish:kma



jsgt said:


> ...but there are different levels of satisfaction for _some_ of us, and we need a different activity to full fill each of those. It might be the actual act, it might be watching...


Sounds a lot like an addiction to me.:tiptoe I don't see an issue with using porn in a relationship (only that I wouldn't), however, when it starts to interfere with life, such as a relationship like in the OP's experience, it's an addiction.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I am more bothered about my last bf doing it without knowing if id he okay with it. He was addicted but managed to get it down to twice a week.


----------



## xxguitarplayinxx (May 21, 2010)

No man or woman needs porn. If you choose to watch it, that's your own thing. Me, personally, I don't care for it. I'd take the real thing over it, any day. If I needed something sooner, I'd use my imagination. Check out reddit.com/r/nofap and you'll see why.


----------



## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

I'm just going to leave this here OP...


----------



## Zeeshan (Sep 4, 2011)

xxguitarplayinxx said:


> No man or woman needs porn. If you choose to watch it, that's your own thing. Me, personally, I don't care for it. I'd take the real thing over it, any day. If I needed something sooner, I'd use my imagination. Check out reddit.com/r/nofap and you'll see why.


Forget it bro, you are preaching to the addicts

They just wont believe it.


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I'm sure i'll find someone who makes me feel beautiful inside and out someday, it's a shame my ex boyfriend didn't do that. I'm guessing it didn't take long for him to start using porn again. The funny thing is he tries to convince me he was using porn to remind him of me, it's nearly been a year and he's been lying for that long. I think he is telling me what I wanted to hear, I did keep saying why didn't you look at girls that look like me, why don't you pretend it's me and you etc. He told me he found it awkward, he now expects me to believe he searched for brunettes in his collection then squinted and pretended they were me.


----------

