# Support group for treating/overcoming SAD



## dan_ (Aug 26, 2006)

I have no desire for living a life with social anxiety disorder, thus it is my only desire in life to overcome social anxiety disorder.

I have an immoderate degree of focus, as well as complete consciousness that this focus will be gone shortly if my only desire is not achieved. If I do not conquer my deepest fear within one year, my deepest fear will become an abounding and frightening reality that I will never escape.

I have done my homework, and I believe there is nothing available for me to partake in that will suffice my time restraints, and my energy restraints. Therefore I have produced only one conclusion. I am producing my own exposure therapy group for overcoming social anxiety disorder and I will be taking it to my grave.

I am posting my conclusions on this board for a variety or reasons, the most prevalent among them being the hope that there may be someone, or possibly several people, among the 500+ that read this post, that will have enough in common with my unorthodox mind to join me, or at the very least participate, in the pursuit of what _I believe_ to be the _only realistic solution_ to overcoming the utter devastation that social anxiety produces for one in every two-hundred people on this planet.

There have been three people on this board that portrayed a serious and personal interest in the details of my plan. There have also been two who were passively curious of the details.

So, now that I have them, I will lay a majority of them out, and I will do so very thoroughly.



likewater said:


> instil said:
> 
> 
> > man,you know you arent going to idaho no matter WHAT the details are.
> ...


I have thought and thought of the ridiculous irrationality of SA for so many years, and I don't feel like wasting my energy to count those years.

My mind works, as I stated before, unorthodoxly, yet, extremely logically. I saw a one-week intensive exposure therapy class for reducing social anxiety in New York for a price of $999. I was shocked when my parents casually avoided my desire to attend. If I had adequate money left in my bank account, I would have, without hesitation, driven over 2400 miles and participated in the class for two and a half hours each day while spending the rest of it sleeping in my car. I would move to New York or to Canada with very little hesitation if I saw someone expressing his or her passion exactly as I am. I would pay $10000 of money I don't have to move to Australia for four weeks if I was aware of an effective treatment and had reliable resources to cement my belief in the program.



dan_ said:


> *EDIT: I am not backing out of this.. I have made up my mind. If you want to I encourage you, anyone, to join, this group will commence in less than two months..*
> *
> EDIT: I am going to find at least 20 people, all from Boise if there is nobody from this board who wants to join. It will be ideal for curing SAD*


I would like to retract my statements.

I am not backing out of this, and I can guarantee you that I will take it to my grave, however I cannot say with complete authority that this group will commence in less than two months or that it will be ideal for curing SAD. I cannot say that it will even commence at all. I have a vast amount of confidence that it will be extremely successful for treating social anxiety disorder, if it does eventually take place, and I have approximately 80% confidence that this group will commence at some point within the next eight months and contain at least 20 people.

These are the resolutions I have came upon assuming nobody is willing to partake in this with me. I am going to strive with every ounce of energy I can locate to make my desire a reality. I have talked about the following numerous times with very little positive response; however, if one person with the same passions and goals as myself were to move to Boise, Idaho and participate in the organization of this group I would have approximately 90% confidence that it will eventually commence, and probably do so much quicker. I have already found a location and will be signing a lease shortly. If two people were to join me I would raise that approximation to 95%. If three people were to join me I would raise it to 98.5%. If four people, all somewhat like-minded, were to join me, and for example rent a house together, I would raise that approximation to 99.5%. Again, I have a vast amount of confidence that this group, even set-up by myself, will be extremely successful for treating social anxiety disorder, if it does eventually take place.

Besides helping myself I have a longing to help other people. All rational actions may stem from self-desire; for whatever the reason may be, my desire is there, and providing any help to others will provide a degree of happiness within myself. I will stand by my commitment to help others. I am concerned that some individuals, those with anxiety worse than my own, may find it too difficult and overwhelming to partake in this hypothetical group. I am extremely committed and have a lot of confidence in my ability; it is to the point where I will take an extra three, or more hours out of every one of my days to discuss and help any individuals who may feel overwhelmed. I will be working at a call center on Saturdays from 8am-4pm and Sundays 12pm-8pm while the group will be from 6pm-10pm Monday thru Saturday, so I will have every weekday available for anybody who needs it.

The following posts will include the exact details of the first week, every single minute accounted for. I have stated in past posts that I predict a ten-week group, however I have changed my prediction. It is more precise, although not certain. I plan to have the group meet Monday thru Saturday from 6pm-10pm and be four weeks in length. I think an amazing amount can be accomplished in four weeks. If I hold this group once and have positive results, I very much anticipate holding it again. A lot of people will want medication to go through this treatment, and some may require it, because the structure of the group will be intensive exposure therapy. Like I stated earlier, I very much anticipate holding the group again if the results are positive. This will allow people to go through the group on medication the first time and progress to the point where they can go through the group off medication the second time.

The program will be non-profit.

(Impromptu speeches will be approximately 30%-40% of the total curriculum. I have over a thousand impromptu topics recorded at this point. I also have a large amount of essays and pre-written speeches recorded. The first day of the group, if it does eventually commence, will be from 6pm-11pm, while all others will be from 6pm-10pm).

CBT and medication may be a necessary step for many people to overcome social anxiety disorder. However, it is my firm belief, and I say this with self-diagnosed authority on the matter, that social anxiety disorder cannot be overcome without exposure therapy. The exposure must be difficult for the individual, as well as provide positive reinforcement, and should continue to rise in difficulty as the person progresses; this also must be done in a relatively short amount of time.


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## dan_ (Aug 26, 2006)

There are two requirements that must be fulfilled in order to allow participation. If you don’t meet these requirements your participation is not welcome. This is not meant to discriminate, but to provide the most possible benefit to everyone within the group.
1.	You must be supportive of everyone else.
2. You must be committed to getting better and to the group, and also committed to endure the pain that will inevitably come with progress.


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## dan_ (Aug 26, 2006)

Day 1—6pm to 11pm

6pm- 
·	Everyone shows up on time
·	Empty room(s)- 20 chairs 
·	In front of whole group, I will go first, say full name and what you want to be called, then read for 30 seconds out of a book (........), and then tell why you’re here for 25 to 90 seconds. As I am going first, I will take between 3 to 5 minutes to tell why I am here and why I have created this group.

6:30pm-
·	Now everybody will get into groups of 2 (you will choose the pairings). You will be going over the Cutco manual for 45 minutes. Within the group you alternate reading two pages (act as if you are selling the product and your partner is the customer; try to include as much eye contact and enthusiasm as possible while progressing to minimizing verbatim and becoming less mundane). Every nine minutes you will switch partners and go to the next two pages in the manual (five partners total and ten total pages). 
7:15pm-
·	Now we will get into three randomly generated groups of 7, 7, and 6. Each person will go up in front of the group for 4-5 minutes while another asks pre-determined questions to them. 
·	The questions will be ones you are knowledgeable on such as “What is your full name and how did you get it?” Another example- “Where did you grow up and how did you arrive at your current residence?” Another example- “Do you have a drivers license?” If yes, then ask, “When and how did you get it and what cars have you driven throughout that time?” Another example- “If you are aware and would like to discuss, please tell us about your family tree. For example who are your parents and how old are they? Tell us of any grandparents, cousins, uncles, aunts, or other you may have.”
·	Most answers should last about 15 to 45 seconds. Ask about 8-10 questions per person.
7:45pm-
·	Now we will get into four randomly generated groups of 5. Each person will stand up in front of the 4-person audience and go over 2 pages of Cutco manual (Again acting as if you are really trying to sell your product to prospective customers).
·	We will go around the 5 people and 10 pages twice. On the second time around, the person who went first will go second, the person who went second will go third, and so forth allowing each person to read different pages each time they get in front of their audience. 
·	The pages are very structured so it should be doable for each person, and allow each person to progress with their individual level of skill, while becoming more comfortable to speak in the presence of other people.
8:15pm- 
·	Five-minute break
·	Now get into different groups of 5, again randomly generated groups.
·	All five people will go through a mock presentation of 10 pages while attempting to mime props and really sell them.
9:50pm-
·	Same groups of 5.
·	All five people will stand up in front of their four-person audience and give a two-minute impromptu speech. We will go around the group 3 times allowing each person to give 3 two-minute impromptu speeches on 3 different topics.
10:20pm-
·	Each person will give a 1 min, 30 sec impromptu speech in front of everyone.
11:00pm-
·	At the end of day one I will be giving out a sheet with impromptu speaking tips.
·	I will also be handing out a pre-written speech to everybody. I have ten total speeches. We will be dividing into two separate groups of ten and within the group each person will have a unique speech. You will be giving that speech in front of the other nine people in that group the next day. The speech will be four to six minutes, and you will only be allowed to have one sheet of paper at the time of the speech. Included with the speeches is an outline of the speech; you can use that as your one sheet of paper or make your own. You will need to familiarize yourself with the topic and key points (Try not to completely memorize the speech and at the same time minimize your focus on that piece of paper you bring with you), and you will be forced to speak extemporaneously. 
·	Leave


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## dan_ (Aug 26, 2006)

Day 2—6pm to 10pm

6pm-
·	We will be getting into two separate and randomly generated groups of ten. Each person within the group will get up in front of the audience for a 1-minute impromptu speech. We will be going around each group fives times so each person will be giving five 1-minute impromptu speeches on five different topics.

7pm-
·	We will get back into the ten person groups we devised yesterday and each person will give their speech to the 9-person audience. 
·	Each person will be up there making an attempt at his or her speech for four to six minutes. 
·	Through pain and positive reinforcement comes progress. If you are scared of this just remember to familiarize yourself with your topic as much as possible. Also, everybody there has social anxiety disorder to one degree or another; your audience will be understanding, encouraging, and most of all extremely supportive- positive reinforcement will be one of the key concepts to allow each individual to become less and less anxious as time progresses.

10-minute break until approximately 8:15pm

8:15pm-
·	We will be getting into groups of two
·	Alternating, each person will be giving 3 two-minute impromptu speeches to the other.

8:30pm-
·	You will be switching to another partner.
·	Alternating, each person will be giving 3 two-minute impromptu speeches to the other.

8:45pm-
·	Etc.

9:00pm-
·	Etc.

9:15pm-
·	Etc.

9:30pm-
·	We will be getting into five randomly generated groups of four.
·	Each person will be given an impromptu topic and three minutes to prepare an outline (all group members will be given their topic at the same time and all preparation will be done before any of the speakers begin their speech) for a three-minute speech. 

9:45pm-
·	We will be getting into different groups of four, again randomly generated.
·	Etc.

10:00pm-
·	At the end of day two I will be giving out a sheet with tips on preparing speeches.
·	I will also be giving out a speech assignment for day three. The speech will be on ‘your most missed memory/favorite thing from now or the past.’ You can also choose your own topic if you wish. The speech will be 7-9 minutes. I encourage you to write no more than a brainstorm/cluster about this topic.
E.g.- topic center
A.	Who 
I.	Was anyone else involved? ..or by yourself

B.	When
I.	Age, what was your life like?
II.	How you got involved

C.	What
I.	What happened?
II.	How did it feel and why?
III.	Why was it so influential/important/…?

D.	Etc.

E. Etc.

Bring no more than one page with you… brief outline- opening, 2-4 main points, conclusion, etc. Try to convey what you really felt and again encourage yourself to not have all the words down and memorized, encourage yourself to make an attempt at speaking extemporaneously- everybody does have social anxiety disorder, yet- it’s your topic- you know about it- inform others.
·	Leave


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## dan_ (Aug 26, 2006)

Day 3—6pm to 10pm

6pm-
·	We will be getting into three randomly generated groups of 7, 7, and 6.
·	Each person will be in front of the audience making an attempt at his or her speech assignment for seven to nine minutes. 

7pm-
·	We will be getting into three different randomly generated groups of 7, 7, and 6.
·	Each person will be giving a five-minute impromptu speech with five minutes to prepare beforehand>>again>>brief outline- opening attention getter, 2-4 main points, and a conclusion linked to the opening>>try to convey what you feel. Each impromptu topic will be well thought out with plenty of room for discussion.

10-minute break until approximately 8:00pm

8pm-
·	We will be getting into five randomly generated groups of 4.
·	Each person will be given a pre-written essay and will have ten minutes to read/skim it and turn it into a 4-6 minute speech.

8:30pm-
·	Same five groups of 4.
·	Etc.- new essays.

9:00pm-
·	In front of all 19 others everyone will give a two-minute impromptu. I will aim for interesting topics, such as 
‘Sell a bottle of whiteout to the group.’ 
‘You are an ant. Convince an anteater to not eat you.’
‘Convince us that homework is harmful to your health.’
Etc.
Etc.

10:00pm-
·	I will be giving out a speech assignment for day four.
·	It will be a motivational (attempt) or persuasive (attempt) speech. It will be 9-12 minutes in length on a topic of your choice. You will have a maximum of one page to refer to when speaking. It should be in your best interest to memorize main points, have a very clear thesis, and speak extemporaneously. When day four comes we will have four randomly generated groups of five so you will be giving your speech in front of a four-person audience.
·	It can be…
·	Something you care about
·	Something you don’t care about
·	Something important
·	Something miniscule
·	A made up story; example- new scientific information you have discovered and what it all means to us (try to convince your audience that it means something and they have got to do something in this ‘new world we’re living in’) example- why exactly you are killing yourself if you don’t wear socks while you sleep
·	‘Really’ selling a seemingly unimportant product/ selling a fake/newly discovered product
·	An entrepreneur trying to justify/sell his new business proposal
·	A motivational speech topic on the internet
·	Anything else
·	Remember, when making a point or selling/persuading the audience, always anticipate the opposing side's argument and refute it.
·	Leave


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## dan_ (Aug 26, 2006)

Day 4—6pm to 10pm

6pm-
·	We will be getting into four randomly generated groups of 5.
·	Each person gives a two-minute impromptu speech with one minute to prepare beforehand. Each group will go around five times, thus five two-minute impromptu speeches, each with one minute to prepare, for each person.

7pm-
·	We will be getting into four different randomly generated groups of 5.
·	Etc.

5-10 minute break until approximately 8:00pm

8pm-
·	We will be getting into four different randomly generated groups of 5.
·	Etc.

9pm-
·	We will be getting into four different randomly generated groups of 5.
·	Each person within the group will be making an attempt at his or her speech assignment for 9-12 minutes in front of their four-person audience.

10pm-
·	I will be giving out three different speech assignments for day five.
·	Speech one will be a ‘how to’/demonstration on a topic of your choice. The speech will be in front of all 19 other people in the group and be approximately five minutes in length. 
·	Speech two will be an informative on a topic of your choice. It will be given in a ten-person group and be approximately five minutes in length. 
·	Speech three will be a (ridiculously) far-fetched persuasion on a topic of your choice. It will be given in a ten-person group and be approximately five minutes in length. 
·	By this point you have gained a lot of experience in outlining speeches and speaking extemporaneously. I advise you to not spend much time on preparing your speeches (e.g., ten to fifteen minutes per speech- selecting a topic and preparing an outline). 
·	Leave


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## dan_ (Aug 26, 2006)

Day 5-6pm to 10pm

6pm-
·	Each person will be making an attempt at his or her 'how to'/demonstration speech assignment for approximately five minutes in front of the entire group.
·	People will be chosen randomly until all 20-group members have made their speech.

5-10 minute break until approximately 8:00pm

8pm-
·	We will be getting into randomly generated groups of 10.
·	Each person will be making an attempt at his or her informative speech assignment for approximately five minutes in front of his or her nine-person audience.

9pm-
·	We will be getting into different randomly generated groups of 10.
·	Each person will be making an attempt at his or her far-fetched persuasion speech assignment for approximately five minutes in front of his or her nine-person audience.

10pm-
·	I will be giving out a speech assignment for day six.
·	Leave

_
I have the details of day six arranged, however, I won't go into those details with anybody but myself. I will go into them myself out of necessity. I won't go into them with anybody else, until the end of day five, because I believe it to be in your best interest._


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## dan_ (Aug 26, 2006)

I have listed the first week of the group, however it is only hypothetical.

Like I have said twice before I will be taking this to my grave. With nobody on this board to partake in the participation or organization of the group I have approximately 80% confidence in its eventual commencement, and if this commencement occurs it will almost certainly be within the next eight months.

I have 100% confidence in my ability to run/lead this group according to schedule; I am currently in the process of creating that schedule for weeks 2-4.

If anybody has any thoughts on the matter, I would be very appreciative of your willingness to share them. 

--Dan


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## soundsgood (Nov 7, 2005)

much respect for the obvious amount of time and thought you have put into your program. it's good to see your so ready to make the effort to try and help yourself and others. i was involved in a hospital-run socail anxiety therapy group a few years ago, if you wanna know any of the in's and outs id be happy to try and help. hope it works out successfully for ya & good luck.


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## AlekParker (Oct 31, 2006)

Wow it seems like you're pretty darn determined. If only you were in Southern california i would definitely attend your group meetings. Good organization and it looks like something that would definitely help a lot.


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## scitz (Apr 10, 2006)

*CBT group*



dan_ said:


> I have listed the first week of the group, however it is only hypothetical.
> 
> Like I have said twice before I will be taking this to my grave. With nobody on this board to partake in the participation or organization of the group I have approximately 80% confidence in its eventual commencement, and if this commencement occurs it will almost certainly be within the next eight months.
> 
> ...


Dan. I really admire your determination and persistence in getting a group together. I have tried to form a support group once in LA but it was too hard to work the timing out. It will be hard to find 20 people to gather up. I think 6 or 8 is a good # and will be sufficient in behaviorial therapy. Im currently taking a group therapy course for SAD that consist of 6 people. And it has helped me some. I still suffer from SAD but its getting better slowly. Its really exhausting to live with SAD. If only you were in LA. I'd join your group. I can even bring some materials from my group to share. Try Dr. Richards CBT tapes. They are the best material i've found for SAD hands down. Best of luck w/ the group.


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## ebolarama (Nov 13, 2006)

-


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## Softy785 (Apr 16, 2006)

> Wow it seems like you're pretty darn determined. If only you were in Southern california i would definitely attend your group meetings. Good organization and it looks like something that would definitely help a lot.


 :agree 
You gotta move to southern cali! I would definitely be interested in attending your group, but would maybe like a little more emphasis on the cognitive portion of things, and maybe some behavioral exercises other than only speeches.


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