# "Society's Pressures Suck!"



## Feline (Aug 13, 2006)

One thing I disagree with is the idea that society's pressures suck. 

"Why am I expected to have to act or look a certain way around people? Why can't I just be myself? Why can't people just accept me for how I am?"

Society's pressures are here to stay, and they should be something that is accepted, because they are a deep part of human nature and they aren't always a bad thing. 

If something is important to you or unchangeable and it doesn't fit the norm, then yes keep it that way, go against the grain, but don't blame others for their initial puzzlement about that thing. It's natural to be unnerved about something that seems different or strange. You are the same way, believe it or not. You just have to suck it up, get it in your head that you are this way, and be prepared to be open about your difference in just being the way you are. There are plenty of people out there who have differences and even though are treated strangely at first, they end up being admired people in society and people accept them in the end. There are jerks out there but you just take them in stride and realize that there's always going to be rude people out there, but they aren't the ones worth worrying about.

In my opinion however, there is nothing wrong with making an effort to fit in or be how people want you to, unless it's something that you feel wrong about or goes against the grain of who you are. In the end, if people look more positively on you, they are going to treat you more positively, and you are going to feel better. It's that simple, and there's nothing wrong with it. 

"When in Rome, act as Romans do."

In my opinion, the biggest thing I think would be beneficial for certain SA folks to try to do more, is to make an effort to be courteous and friendly to others. Smile, ask how others are doing, basically show that you care.


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## IndigoGirl (Aug 13, 2006)

You're right about that.


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## Tungsten (Dec 11, 2005)

Feline said:


> In my opinion, the biggest thing I think would be beneficial for certain SA folks to try to do more, is to make an effort to be courteous and friendly to others. Smile, ask how others are doing, basically show that you care.


Good post. I agree with this. Simple things like smiling and being friendly to people just don't come naturally to a lot of us so we really have to make a conscious effort to do these things until they become natural.


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## JonDalone (Aug 14, 2006)

For me it's always about putting things into perspective. 

Always judge things on a case-to-case basis as there is no "one-size-fits-all" rule that you can use for all of life. But there are patterns you can figure out to help you out in social situations of similar contexts.

Eventually if you spend 90% of your time observing and 10% acting you will find when you do act, you act with more confidence because you have seen the same scenario a thousand times and know how to act when the situation comes up.

I guess it's a process of knowing your strengths and weaknesses, in some situations I feel more comfortable watching, others I feel comfortable enough to speak my mind. I hate to say that life is a strategic game but it is. 

A funny thing my professor went over one day was that it's either you "Get it" or you don't. Certain species of animal do the mating dance when mating, if the dance is done wrong, you are rejected and the session is over. (AKA you don't get laid)

A simple way for humans to surmount this error is to continually consciously observe others and just mimic them, eventually you'll see the flaws and make your own improvements upon it. After that it won't just be mimicry, it will be your own version. 

Don't ask me why or how but before coming to college I used to be a free spirit and not much of a critical thinker, but lately I have been more comfortable operating with my Left Brain than Right, and oddly enough my teachers are saying I'm being too analytical and not expressive enough, but in High School it was the complete opposite! They told me I needed to stop daydreaming. 

Go figure. 

Sad to say but it's come down to this. Life is a Beeyotch, either you Adapt or lose the game. College taught me that sometimes you just need to shut up and observe what's going on, catch the rhythmn, then beat the enemy into a pulp. 

Just make sure you translate whatever challeneges you need to surmount into a language you can understand. For me I'm obsessed with Fighting games so everytime I'm learning something new I try to compare it to an aspect of martial arts to keep my attention. 

As stupid as it is it actually works. In the end I don't feel like I've become a slave to the system or a servant for "the man" like I originally felt, but someone who is using their potential to it's fullest. 

If anything I wrote seems to not make sense or be completely irrelevant to this posting I'm sorry, this is what happens when you take too much valerian.


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## challenged101 (Aug 15, 2006)

tht was a good post feline!

I will try that today.


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## LionsDen (Aug 17, 2006)

*smiling*

i find it hard to smile with sa. :cig

thank god for smilicons

karma is what i believe in

someonetreats you bad, it'll come around, trust me, and hopefully it falls back on them 10 FOLD!

:mum


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## Sunny Day (Aug 1, 2006)

I am usually very friendly to most people I see on a daily basis. If I go to a market, I will say "hello" to the checker and "thank you" as I leave. When they say, "have a good day", I respond with, "You too!" It usually makes them happy to have someone respond in a positive way.


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