# I don't want a therapist, I want someone to talk to



## dunky (Jul 10, 2009)

That line might not make too much sense, but I don't want someone who just sits there and listens to what I say then writes something down. I don't want someone who makes it their priority when meeting to try to get me motivated to find a job. I don't want someone who's going to tell me to go back to school. I just need someone that I can talk to, express my feelings and get some feedback on them, give me some sort of exercises I can do (if any, I don't even know) and hopefully slowly break out back into every day life. Then the job and school can follow.


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## deeds14 (Jul 9, 2009)

Either you've never been to therapy before or you've never had a good therapist! I've had a few good ones and a few bad ones. The good ones do NOT just sit there and take notes. The good ones are totally there for you and give you feedback and are interactive.


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## Pam (Feb 14, 2009)

I guess I haven't had a good therapist either...

I want the same thing as you dunky. I need someone to help motivate me to get going with my life!!!


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## homer (Nov 23, 2008)

Therapy sessions for me were intense and uncomfortable and not very productive. The sessions themselves became a source of anxiety. Someone I could just talk to would be nice.

Do all therapists do that intense listening thing? That freaks me out.


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## shychick2 (Oct 20, 2008)

Really they can't make you motivated to get a job-you have a lot of control. If you want listening then counselling may be good. Listening and providing insights is psychotherapy (well roughly). CBT is more doing exercises and tasks. I understand that CBT is the most effective in SA and ruminating on anxiety rather than tackling it can make it worse.Therapists may use a combination of approaches and the relationship can be the most important thing sometimes.


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## danstelter (Jan 16, 2009)

Well, the truth is only you can motivate you. Therapists just try to help you to realize that, and yes it seems as though the therapists you have had have not been the greatest. The other thing to remember is that therapists are not there to tell you what you want to hear; sometimes, therapists tell you what you need to hear, and you might not like what they have to say. I can't say what happened in your case, but be sure to keep an open mind and make sure that you are simply not just reacting to something that you did not like to hear.


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## lastofthekews (May 11, 2009)

I agree with you dunky, I also just want someone to talk to. I've always thought talking to a therapist isn't enough, I want to be able to talk to people who I believe really care about me. The only problem is that when I try to talk to people I trust about my feelings, I feel that i'm irritating them, and then feel bad again.

It would be nice to have a friend who truly understands my feelings, and doesn't mind listening to me, and in turn trust me enough to share their feelings with me. That's what's so great about being on these forums. Although I don't know anyone here properly, I feel that the people I talk to here understand me properly, and care enough to offer me advice and support, and who also value my opinions or suggestions to them. I would love to know people in my real life like the members of this site


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