# Do women like men with muscle?



## thequietmanuk (Feb 20, 2011)

Curious about this. A few years back I decided that I'd lose weight and build muscle. I dropped 60lbs and lifted weights. I figured I don't have looks, don't have money and am can't hold a conversation so my body is the only thing I can change. 

But do women actually find men with muscle attractive?

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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

Most women do still. There are some younger women who are turned off by it, more than there used to be, but it's still highly sought after with most women.

Just keep in mind that its still not the only thing they are looking for in a boyfriend. They also want someone genuinely nice, etc.


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## Not crying (Jul 2, 2018)

The answer is yes and if anyone tells you otherwise, be skeptical. Women are obviously all individual people and if you ask what they're attracted to you'll get a different answer from each, so instead, listen to what men have to say. I can tell you they will be attracted to you if you build up muscles. Having muscles has even been enough to get me FWB relationship despite my anxiety and complete lack of any charisma. It's extremely useful.


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## 1solated (Jul 5, 2018)

Having muscle NEVER hurts, as well as being good looking, tall, $$$, intelligence, education, you get the idea.


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## cubsfandave (Jul 20, 2016)

No, they like nice guys who are confident. Everything else is just a waste of time


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## I can live through this (Apr 20, 2018)

Yes, it's a plus for most women, but don't go too extreme with it, body builders kinda look like monsters.


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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

cubsfandave said:


> No, they like nice guys who are confident. Everything else is just a waste of time


Is this your conclusion based on a lifetime of bodybuilding or a lifetime of drinking beer and eating at McDonald's?


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## peacelizard (Apr 17, 2014)

Sure. But much like everything, it depends on the woman and no two are the same. Some like those stereotypical GTL juice monkeys while others prefer lean and cut. Some just like their men to be strong, so you could look like a Strongman with some combo of muscle, fat and raw strength or a dad bod. Others like farmer strength, you know, guys who don't have to go to the gym because they're out lifting cows every day 'cause it's their job, their livelihood.

It all depends.

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## Umpalumpa (Jan 26, 2014)

See it as a list of things to improve if you are an athlete then youve got that area covered, attraction is simpler then what most people make it up to be but its also not as [email protected] as some people think it is


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## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)

women like a guy they're attracted to and can see a future with.


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## cubsfandave (Jul 20, 2016)

Women don't think like men. A nice guy with confidence doesn't have to be super hot or have muscles or hip to find a mate. This is the mistake guys always make.


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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

peacelizard said:


> Sure. But much like everything, it depends on the woman and no two are the same. Some like those stereotypical GTL juice monkeys while others prefer lean and cut. Some just like their men to be strong, so you could look like a Strongman with some combo of muscle, fat and raw strength or a dad bod. Others like farmer strength, you know, guys who don't have to go to the gym because they're out lifting cows every day 'cause it's their job, their livelihood.
> 
> It all depends.
> 
> Sent from my SM-N950U using Tapatalk


Haha, "GTL juice monkeys", is this something you made up when a real bodybuilder called you an ab monkey?


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## peacelizard (Apr 17, 2014)

SolutionX said:


> Haha, "GTL juice monkeys", is this something you made up when a real bodybuilder called you an ab monkey?


Nah, brohammer, it was your mother

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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

peacelizard said:


> Nah, brohammer, it was your mother
> 
> Sent from my SM-N950U using Tapatalk


Good one. Very original.


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## roxslide (Apr 12, 2011)

I think in general women will pay for attention to you if you have muscles. It will help you stand out from other guys and also I think it will increase your chances (as long as you are not scary muscular). I've heard other women comment positively on men who work out or have muscles.

I personally don't like it. It makes me think the guy is probably very self-absorbed or only working out to get chicks if he spends that much time at the gym, unless he's an actor or a personal trainer, coach, etc (it has something to do with his job or he's very involved in a hobby like sports) then it makes a bit more sense. I have to admit I'm not sure why it turns me off, it's even pretty hypocritical as I myself go to the gym. But I guess I prefer a guy who spends his spare time doing something more interesting or things I can just relate to like video games.


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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

roxslide said:


> I think in general women will pay for attention to you if you have muscles. It will help you stand out from other guys and also I think it will increase your chances (as long as you are not scary muscular). I've heard other women comment positively on men who work out or have muscles.
> 
> I personally don't like it. It makes me think the guy is probably very self-absorbed or only working out to get chicks if he spends that much time at the gym, unless he's an actor or a personal trainer, coach, etc (it has something to do with his job or he's very involved in a hobby like sports) then it makes a bit more sense. I have to admit I'm not sure why it turns me off, it's even pretty hypocritical as I myself go to the gym. But I guess I prefer a guy who spends his spare time doing something more interesting or things I can just relate to like video games.


I believe that staying in good shape is part of every job. I have to lift weights as a computer programmer or else my body, especially my back will get so weak that its impossible to write code anymore. Anyhow, I'm not looking to appeal to every woman in the world, so it's not a big deal.


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## Kinable (Apr 25, 2013)

Generally yes but it's more of a perk rather than a necessity. If you don't have much or really any it's not too big of a deal but if you do have some muscle it's an extra thing to like about you. This is from my experience though but everyone is different.


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## andretti (Jan 2, 2016)

of course. do you notice women who have nice bodies more then women who dont.? 
women notice you more when you are muscular . I speak from experience. Ive been working out for over a decade now and im currently ripped. 
It only opens the door tho , being boring /having limited social skills/low smv and being muscular doesnt help much.


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## Shy Ostrich (Jun 24, 2017)

I'll be honest, I don't find muscular guys attractive.


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## shyraclifford (Jun 24, 2018)

very much love big muscle men


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## roxslide (Apr 12, 2011)

SolutionX said:


> I believe that staying in good shape is part of every job. I have to lift weights as a computer programmer or else my body, especially my back will get so weak that its impossible to write code anymore. Anyhow, I'm not looking to appeal to every woman in the world, so it's not a big deal.


Yeah but functional strength and the type of look that a lot of guys go for isn't really the same. Obviously I think it's good to stay in shape and I've seen pics of you in the muscle thread (I think that's the one) your body type is not what I'm really talking about. I don't mind a dude that looks or is strong. Again I also work out and hike and walk if possible so I'm not against exercise.

I'm talking about dudes that look like this:









usually these guys are young college dudes with supreme hats or shirts and some edgy barber cut. Tbh this picture isnt the best, usually the young guys I see are a bit more cut than this but whatever.









these guys are usually in tanks with a random "macho" pattern like a wolf or a tribal design lol

I work with a lot of young guys and also my cafe is next to a bunch of gyms so I see guys with these bodies a lot.


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## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

roxslide said:


> I'm talking about dudes that look like this:


 Why is he lopsided?



>


 Does he walk sideways?


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## Kinable (Apr 25, 2013)

WillYouStopDave said:


> Why is he lopsided?
> 
> Does he walk sideways?


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## llodell88 (May 15, 2011)

I think women just like healthy looking men and muscular is probably down there on the list even if they do care. i don't really know what i like, but i feel like men tend to admire muscular guys more than women generally. Pretty much all guys look muscular enough to me so I don't know why guys worry about that.


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## Rains (Jan 20, 2016)

How big? 

I like when they're muscly in a natural way. I don't like particularly low body fat, i.e. the 'ripped' look; actually I prefer it when they look just a tiny bit chubby. Also don't look like when they look huge and fake like they're on steroids.


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## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

I tend to prefer skinny guys with a bit of pudge. My ex was always embarrassed by his little belly but I thought it was super cute. I'm guilty of stereotyping anyway, when I see super buff guys I automatically assume they're incredibly full of themselves and aren't super intelligent. I know, I know, not very nice


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## rmb1990 (Jan 16, 2015)

Not particularly.


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## Not crying (Jul 2, 2018)

FallenOne said:


> That is really a subjective question, as not all women will be attracted to muscular guys, as every female has a preference.


I slightly disagree, and this is one of those weird areas where people's experiences don't seem to match up on each side of it. It's true that women are individuals with individual preferences, and every one is going to have a different opinion on muscles if you ask them. But, it's also true that men who have muscles are going to experience better treatment and have not success dating women and aren't turned down for having muscles.

So women's expressed preferences don't match up to the real experience of being a man who has muscles vs is skinny.


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## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

I'm not buying unless he has a butt like this


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## Querh (Apr 20, 2017)

All women love big muscles, especially one down there.


Sorry, had to do it


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## Not crying (Jul 2, 2018)

FallenOne said:


> I have been to nightclubs where I have first hand seen over muscular bodybuilder type guys in skin tight shirts thinking just because they look huge and stand out like a tank, they will draw girls like moths to a flame.
> 
> In fact, quite the opposite effect actually. I remember this one guy that was wearing a skin tight shirt and had a back as wide as a tank, and women were looking at him with this insecure frightened look on their faces, moving around him in circles trying to avoid him as if this guy had leprocy or something.


All that's viewing it as an outside observer, and my point is that there is a mismatch of the experiences. Many women will _ express _ disgust or disinterest for guys with large muscles, and I'm not going to call them liars, but it's also the case that the guy with large muscles is certainly easily having sex with women he's finding attractive and is not experiencing any lack of interest due to those muscles. His lived experience is not matching up with the expressed preferences of women.


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## Querh (Apr 20, 2017)

fallenone said:


> idk what kinda muscle you mean... But that's an organ.


its humor, squidward


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## girlyone1 (Jan 20, 2012)

Muscles look nice but it doesn't really matter. I've known some girls to be into skinny men.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

Yes. Those that say no are kidding themselves.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

roxslide said:


> Yeah but functional strength and the type of look that a lot of guys go for isn't really the same. Obviously I think it's good to stay in shape and I've seen pics of you in the muscle thread (I think that's the one) your body type is not what I'm really talking about. I don't mind a dude that looks or is strong. Again I also work out and hike and walk if possible so I'm not against exercise.
> 
> I'm talking about dudes that look like this:
> 
> ...


Ah yes, the ab monkey. If you go to the gym you can see them in their natural habitat hitting on women and doing sit-ups. They never seem to migrate over to the heavy weights though.


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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

probably offline said:


> I'm not buying unless he has a butt like this


OMG, why did they shave his ***? Poor animal.


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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

Querh said:


> All women love big muscles, especially one down there.
> 
> Sorry, had to do it


Their foot muscles? ;P


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## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

There's only one muscle women care about.


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## Ai (Oct 13, 2012)

llodell88 said:


> i feel like men tend to admire muscular guys more than women generally.


This.


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## pixietrancelove (Jul 1, 2018)

I prefer men that are cuddly lol 

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## momentsunset (Nov 10, 2009)

Don't get me wrong, I like muscles and all, but I kind of prefer men that don't look like they exercise 24/7. A few extra lbs are okay to me.



thequietmanuk said:


> I figured I don't have looks, don't have money and am can't hold a conversation *so my body is the only thing I can change. *


???
You can change so much more if you're not lazy. You can definitely learn how to better hold a conversation and it will probably get you a lot further with women, and even if it doesn't, it will at least help you be better around people in general.


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## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

The young ones do. Older ones are more interested in things like personality, honesty, integrity, etc.


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## Qolselanu (Feb 15, 2006)

Fit is better than not fit. Exercise is particularly helpful for guys who are in a huge rut. The progression of running harder/longer and lifting heavier over time gives feelings of accomplishment, energy, and confidence. This is attractive. Plus exercise is relatively cheap to get into - anyone can start with running and body weight exercises.


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## EggsBenedict (Dec 28, 2017)

I don't know if women necessarily just go for all of the big muscle guys, but I can tell you that if you are scrawny, you will have a tough time. Most women will tell you a bunch of BS otherwise, since they don't have any clue what really makes them tick sexually, but scrawniness never works.

I was scrawny in my adolescence. I was scrawny in my teens. And I've been scrawny all my adult life. I havn't been able to overcome the appetite and consistency challenges of eating and working out to achieve any measure of improvement in this area. So I guess I've given up due to lack of incentive. 

I remain a virgin, despite having a good job, being a nice guy, and all that bla bla nonsense women say when you ask them what they want. If I had the wit, charm, curiosity, and intelligence to overcome my physical limiations, it might not be such a big deal. But I don't have enough other things to overcome the scrawniness factor.

Now, don't get me wrong; they do in fact want those things in a guy too, but it's not what makes them want to sleep with you. That I can tell you.


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## jhinds (May 30, 2011)

This thread prompted me to ask a female friend of mine (who's a solid 10/10 on the looks scale) for her thoughts on how much of a difference muscles make. She didn't answer directly, only saying that height plays a much larger factor. If you're tall, then muscles are less important than if you're short. She says she sees lots of buff short guys struggle with attracting women.

As a 6'2" guy, that's heartening to hear. But at only 175 lbs I'm sure I could greatly improve my odds if I added 10 lbs of muscle mass. Like others, though, I struggle with the discipline required to make that happen.


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## Mlt18 (Jun 29, 2016)

,


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

EggsBenedict said:


> *I don't know if women necessarily just go for all of the big muscle guys, but I can tell you that if you are scrawny, you will have a tough time. Most women will tell you a bunch of BS otherwise, since they don't have any clue what really makes them tick sexually, but scrawniness never works.*
> 
> I was scrawny in my adolescence. I was scrawny in my teens. And I've been scrawny all my adult life. I havn't been able to overcome the appetite and consistency challenges of eating and working out to achieve any measure of improvement in this area. So I guess I've given up due to lack of incentive.
> 
> ...


Just because female sexuality is too complicated for you and most people to understand, doesn't mean you have a greater knowledge of it than women do on their own individual sexuality.

Tbh I like going down this route though because it ends in a scientific discussion on how 'a woman would actually prefer a woman sexually to you by a little bit'  Now that's not the particular peg you need to be knocked down from since you're obviously already insecure about your attractiveness, but I guess it's _a peg_.

Luckily for you (or not,) women make decisions based on a really wide range of information and traits not just physical appearance either, and not just ****ability (eg: are you good relationship material?)


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## bayberry (Oct 13, 2017)

Muscular men are a turn off for me.


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## EggsBenedict (Dec 28, 2017)

Persephone The Dread said:


> Just because female sexuality is too complicated for you and most people to understand, doesn't mean you have a greater knowledge of it than women do on their own individual sexuality.
> 
> Tbh I like going down this route though because it ends in a scientific discussion on how 'a woman would actually prefer a woman sexually to you by a little bit'  Now that's not the particular peg you need to be knocked down from since you're obviously already insecure about your attractiveness, but I guess it's _a peg_.
> 
> Luckily for you (or not,) women make decisions based on a really wide range of information and traits not just physical appearance either, and not just ****ability (eg: are you good relationship material?)


I don't see what "peg" I need to be knocked down from. Guess someone's a little salty.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

EggsBenedict said:


> I don't see what "peg" I need to be knocked down from. Guess someone's a little salty.


Thinking that people are lying or mistaken about what they're looking for and thinking your opinion is superior. It's not.


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## EggsBenedict (Dec 28, 2017)

Persephone The Dread said:


> Thinking that people are lying or mistaken about what they're looking for and thinking your opinion is superior. It's not.


I have no idea what you are talking about or why you are attacking me.

My point stands that many women, when asked about what qualities they find attractive in a man, often cite qualities that make a man a good person, not what makes them sexually appealing. I didn't say they were lying necessarily. The two are not mutually exclusive.

This is why jerks tend to get girls, when nice guys don't. Girls want to like the nice guys, because they are good people, but they aren't attractive.

This really is not a controversial opinion.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

EggsBenedict said:


> I have no idea what you are talking about or why you are attacking me.
> 
> My point stands that many women, when asked about what qualities they find attractive in a man, often cite qualities that make a man a good person, not what makes them sexually appealing. I didn't say they were lying necessarily. The two are not mutually exclusive.
> 
> ...


This is what you said:



> since they don't have any clue what really makes them tick sexually


Basically you think you know more about what any one woman wants, than she does.

I don't think it's that controversial because your attitude is widespread.


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## EggsBenedict (Dec 28, 2017)

Persephone The Dread said:


> This is what you said:
> 
> Basically you think you know more about what any one woman wants, than she does.
> 
> I don't think it's that controversial because your attitude is widespread.


I think we're on the verge of starting a "gender war" here, as the moderators put it. This comment thread will probably be locked if we continue with this little spat.

However, I didn't say that I personally know anything about how to attract a woman. But attitude or not, I think it's been pretty confirmed for me that being things like responsible, courteous, and respectful doesn't really get a girl's motor going for me. I'll just leave it at that.


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## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

EggsBenedict said:


> I think we're on the verge of starting a "gender war" here, as the moderators put it. This comment thread will probably be locked if we continue with this little spat.
> 
> However, I didn't say that I personally know anything about how to attract a woman. But attitude or not, I think it's been pretty confirmed for me that being things like responsible, courteous, and respectful doesn't really get a girl's motor going for me. I'll just leave it at that.


In other words, "let me get the last word in but don't respond or the thread will get locked."


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## Not crying (Jul 2, 2018)

EggsBenedict said:


> Most women will tell you a bunch of BS otherwise, since they don't have any clue what really makes them tick sexually
> 
> Now, don't get me wrong; they do in fact want those things in a guy too, but it's not what makes them want to sleep with you. That I can tell you.


Spot on. It's better to be the guy they can't explain why they want to **** then be the guy they can't explain why they want nothing to do with him.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## gunner21 (Aug 4, 2012)

roxslide said:


> I think in general women will pay for attention to you if you have muscles. It will help you stand out from other guys and also I think it will increase your chances (as long as you are not scary muscular). I've heard other women comment positively on men who work out or have muscles.
> 
> I personally don't like it. It makes me think the guy is probably very self-absorbed or only working out to get chicks if he spends that much time at the gym, unless he's an actor or a personal trainer, coach, etc (it has something to do with his job or he's very involved in a hobby like sports) then it makes a bit more sense. I have to admit I'm not sure why it turns me off, it's even pretty hypocritical as I myself go to the gym. But I guess I prefer a guy who spends his spare time doing something more interesting or things I can just relate to like video games.


Gonna have to correct you there. I go to the gym in my spare time a lot and I don't think I'm more self-absorbed than an average person. I don't think most avid gym goers are more self-absorbed than average as well.

For me at least, the gym gives me a place where I have some control and where you know input=output. When the rest of your life is falling apart, it can be a refuge as it gives you a routine and some control. It also gives you something to do. If I didn't go there, I know I'd wallow in self-pity and misery inside my room all day.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

I've heard mixed opinions about muscles. I'm sure being generally fit won't hurt at all, but if you look like a WWE wrestler you might get wildly varied feedback.


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## roxslide (Apr 12, 2011)

gunner21 said:


> Gonna have to correct you there. I go to the gym in my spare time a lot and I don't think I'm more self-absorbed than an average person. I don't think most avid gym goers are more self-absorbed than average as well.
> 
> For me at least, the gym gives me a place where I have some control and where you know input=output. When the rest of your life is falling apart, it can be a refuge as it gives you a routine and some control. It also gives you something to do. If I didn't go there, I know I'd wallow in self-pity and misery inside my room all day.


Yeah I know. Again I'm not really sure why I don't like it and it's hypocritical of me because I actually go to the gym myself for 1-2 hrs 3-4 times a week. These are just my unconscious bias thoughts or something. I guess I was thinking a little harder on it after I posted that and it's not really muscles but the whole package that matters. I'm just used to seeing muscles on douches so I think I've just started to immediately think muscles == douche. Guys that have been nice to me or have a lot in common with me are generally lanky or not very fit at all so I think I made the mistake thinking it was causation over correlation.

I am pretty self-absorbed though and I go to the gym. But yeah there are totally lots of reasons to go to the gym, it's been helping my anxiety which is why I decided to start going. It's just threads like these and dudes I meet that cause me to stereotype I guess.


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## truant (Jul 4, 2014)

I'd comment but I'd just get into another argument the outcome of which nobody cares about.


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## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

I like skinny guys that are about 5'6" to 5'8". My first boyfriend was all about being in shape but he was incredibly narcisstic. 😈


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

truant said:


> I'd comment but I'd just get into another argument the outcome of which nobody cares about.


Know the feeling. I don't bother saying what I like in guys anymore. :/ Unless it's a fictional character who can't try to convince me that I'm wrong and stupid.


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## gunner21 (Aug 4, 2012)

OP, if you're lifting to get girls, you're doing it wrong. Girls really don't give that much of a ****.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

Moreso after having encounters w/ firefighters and having them get on my radar more. :um :hide


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