# for females-do you consider this being selfish?



## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

I'm trying to get my girlfriend to eat healthier. I try to get her to eat salads, vegetables, and the like. She promised she would eat half a carrot last night but was only able to finish like one inch of it lol. Now, this is how it all began. I found out she didn't eat very healthy when we went out and ate at a restaurant for the first time. She ordered a steak. Salads customarily come with the steak but she switched it out for fries. She said she didn't eat salads. To be honest, I was flabbergasted. I never heard of a person never eating salads. Am I being too hard or should a partner expect the other partner to eat healthy? She is nine years older than I am and she wasn't overly attractive when we first met, although she has a nice can lol. We just had similar interests. But I can't help but wonder what she's gonna look like in 7-10 years if she doesn't eat vegetables and stuff. Plus, she said she would gag if necessary to be with me. She isn't trying to gag very hard when she can't eat more than an inch of a carrot lol. Any help would be appreciated.


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

lol...my ex ate like **** too. She wasn't fat at all..yet. But I learned my lesson there - better to meet someone who is more in tune with your lifestyle rather than trying to change them later on. It's really, really hard if you go he direct route and will probably only backfire. In fact my ex and I got into a huge fight about this one time. The fact of the matter is, it only comes off as obnoxious in a girl's eyes, even if your main concern is her health. The only way to do it is indirectly - eat right and exercise yourself and hopefully she will follow your example.


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## Ivan AG (Sep 29, 2010)

stylicho said:


> I'm trying to get my girlfriend to eat healthier. I try to get her to eat salads, vegetables, and the like. *She promised she would eat half a carrot last night but was only able to finish like one inch of it lol*. Now, this is how it all began. I found out she didn't eat very healthy when we went out and ate at a restaurant for the first time. She ordered a steak. Salads customarily come with the steak but she switched it out for fries. She said she didn't eat salads. To be honest, I was flabbergasted. I never heard of a person never eating salads. Am I being too hard or should a partner expect the other partner to eat healthy? She is nine years older than I am and she wasn't overly attractive when we first met, although she has a nice can lol. We just had similar interests. But I can't help but wonder what she's gonna look like in 7-10 years if she doesn't eat vegetables and stuff. Plus, she said she would gag if necessary to be with me. She isn't trying to gag very hard when she can't eat more than an inch of a carrot lol. Any help would be appreciated.


I'm a ******* for saying this, but GIGGITY GIGGITY.


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## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

rymo said:


> lol...my ex ate like **** too. She wasn't fat at all..yet. But I learned my lesson there - better to meet someone who is more in tune with your lifestyle rather than trying to change them later on. It's really, really hard if you go he direct route and will probably only backfire. In fact my ex and I got into a huge fight about this one time. The fact of the matter is, it only comes off as obnoxious in a girl's eyes, even if your main concern is her health. The only way to do it is indirectly - eat right and exercise yourself and hopefully she will follow your example.


My girlfriend isn't fat either. The only reason she isn't is because she doesn't eat very much in the first place. It's not because of the nutritious food she's eating.


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## lyric (Aug 21, 2011)

If she isn't overweight then let her eat what she wants. I guess you could just be looking out for her health, but most men complain AFTER she gains the weight.


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

stylicho said:


> My girlfriend isn't fat either. The only reason she isn't is because she doesn't eat very much in the first place. It's not because of the nutritious food she's eating.


Gotcha


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

lyric said:


> If she isn't overweight then let her eat what she wants. I guess you could just be looking out for her health, but most men complain AFTER she gains the weight.


See OP? Girls are stubborn about this. I feel your pain (or your pain in a few years at least).


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## lyric (Aug 21, 2011)

rymo said:


> See OP? Girls are stubborn about this. I feel your pain (or your pain in a few years at least).


Men are so worried about a girl's appearance when half the time, they're out of shape themselves.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

You can encourage healthy eating but trying to push it is annoying. Why don't you cook for her or something? Not everyone likes salads. Do you eat a lot of vegetables yourself?

I've never had a guy bother me about what I ate. Only had one ex that really hated it if I drank even though I'm a pretty happy drunk. That caused tension in the relationship. He was kind of a control freak. 

I take that back I had one ex complain about how I never cooked even though he didn't cook very much himself. His mom cooked for him most of the time. So it was like do as I say but not what I do.


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## Brad (Dec 27, 2011)

No offensive, it's kinda a douche move unless they're cramming 5 big macs a day down their throats. I'd hate being in a relationship with a health nut that is telling me what to eat every day.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

I really don't understand why you'd care that much about what she eats. It's not like she has diabetes or she can't walk and needs a motorized scooter. I'd get really pissed if I was dating a guy that judged my dietary habits and tried to change them. I'm sure you'd get annoyed if she tried changing your wardrobe and trying to convince you to throw clothes out.


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## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

komorikun said:


> You can encourage healthy eating but trying to push it is annoying. Why don't you cook for her or something? Not everyone likes salads. Do you eat a lot of vegetables yourself?
> 
> I've never had a guy bother me about what I ate. Only had one ex that really hated it if I drank even though I'm a pretty happy drunk. That caused tension in the relationship. He was kind of a control freak.
> 
> I take that back I had one ex complain about how I never cooked even though he didn't cook very much himself. His mom cooked for him most of the time. So it was like do as I say but not what I do.


I do eat a good amount of vegetables. I think the original catalyst for this was when we got romantic the first time and whenever she would take deep breaths it had a very bad odor. She does smoke though so I'm certain that has something to do with it. Although since I have got her to start eating some yogurt its not nearly as bad.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

stylicho said:


> I do eat a good amount of vegetables. I think the original catalyst for this was when we got romantic the first time and whenever she would take deep breaths it had a very bad odor. She does smoke though so I'm certain that has something to do with it. Although since I have got her to start eating some yogurt its not nearly as bad.


I would worry more about the smoking. That's probably the cause of the bad breath and maybe she has dental issues too. Does she floss?


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## Tangerine (Feb 16, 2010)

Nothing wrong with steak, yo.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

Barette said:


> *I really don't understand why you'd care that much about what she eats. It's not like she has diabetes or she can't walk and needs a motorized scooter. I'd get really pissed if I was dating a guy that judged my dietary habits and tried to change them. *I'm sure you'd get annoyed if she tried changing your wardrobe and trying to convince you to throw clothes out.


Agree. She's a big girl; she knows how the food she eats/doesn't eat affects her, that she doesn't care is another story. Let her be, and if it truly bothers you get a girlfriend whose eating habits are similar to yours... if that's _so_ important to you.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Barette said:


> I really don't understand why you'd care that much about what she eats. It's not like she has diabetes or she can't walk and needs a motorized scooter. I'd get really pissed if I was dating a guy that judged my dietary habits and tried to change them. I'm sure you'd get annoyed if she tried changing your wardrobe and trying to convince you to throw clothes out.


I don't see any issue with at least discussing it with them and hearing out their concerns or point of view regarding their habits. Hell I would be more than happy to have my partner suggest alternatives to a wardrobe or fashion sense in general, just like I would about my eating habits and other ways of living. Forcing someone against their will is another story, but having conversations and discussing concerns is only ever a positive thing I would have thought.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

AussiePea said:


> I don't see any issue with at least discussing it with them and hearing out their concerns or point of view regarding their habits. Hell I would be more than happy to have my partner suggest alternatives to a wardrobe or fashion sense in general, just like I would about my eating habits and other ways of living. Forcing someone against their will is another story, but having conversations and discussing concerns is only ever a positive thing I would have thought.


I don't know, I just know that if a guy were to come to me saying he's concerned about my eating habits, even if it were in a discussion, I'd be insulted. I don't think it's in his place to tell her that she's eating wrong, like AllToAll said she's a big girl. She knows that the body prefers vegetables, but she doesn't care, and that's her choice. I don't see why he wants her to conform to his eating habits.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

I see no problem letting a woman eat what she wants. I'm skinny/tiny and may not eat healthy. Just cause you don't eat healthy or you know eat other food doesn't mean you're fat. I don't really eat salads either. It actually annoys me when girls only order salads out. Like some think they have to do that without looking like a "pig" eating other food? I know I get people like salads but it just seems a lot of girls only eat that. I thought guys would like a girl eating other food like steak or pasta or something. I guess we have to watch our weight. Honestly I can eat anything and still be skinny...who knows it might change when I get older but it might not.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

It might not cause health concerns now, but it may in the future, and I think it's a dangerous assumption to make in assuming people know what is good for them, I mean you only have to go outside for 5 minutes and watch the people walking past to see that, unless of course they simply do not care about themselves.


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

You are doing it all wrong, you need to get her a bib, and while you are at the restaurant you get the peas and carrots on a wide soup spoon. Then you say, "here comes the aeroooplaaaannnne", and pop the veggies into her mouth.

Works every time.


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## CourtneyB (Jul 31, 2010)

lyric said:


> Men are so worried about a girl's appearance when half the time, they're out of shape themselves.


AND going bald with the hair that's left turning gray.

Before trying to make us into photoshopped supermodels, why not make yourself into Magic Mike first? :roll


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

Ultimately, if your lifestyle habbits differ radically from your partner you should probably split and avoid the aggro of trying to change someone. 


Interesting that a lot of female posters on here are annoyed with the OP for trying to change his partner's diet. Now, I actually agree with you to a large extent but it's interesting because this logic didn't seem to apply in an earlier thread with the genders reversed. In that one, the topic was along the lines of: 'womenz, would you date a cool guy who's overweight?'. There were several posters in there with the opinion, 'of course, I'll just make him lose the weight, problem solved '. I won't name names of course since that's just harsh, but you get the picture.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Yes he can get her to eat more veggies and fruit but can she also eat other food? Maybe I'm reading it wrong. Not everyone likes all fruit and veggies..maybe she can mix it in something else.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

CourtneyB said:


> *AND going bald with the hair that's left turning gray.
> *
> Before trying to make us into photoshopped supermodels, why not make yourself into Magic Mike first? :roll


Surely you can't equate genetics that you have no control of with weight; something you have full control of (barring a medical condition)


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## mike285 (Aug 21, 2010)

AussiePea said:


> I don't see any issue with at least discussing it with them and hearing out their concerns or point of view regarding their habits. Hell I would be more than happy to have my partner suggest alternatives to a wardrobe or fashion sense in general, just like I would about my eating habits and other ways of living. Forcing someone against their will is another story, but having conversations and discussing concerns is only ever a positive thing I would have thought.


Yea, I agree. But what's really kind of concerning is that fact that she said she would gag for him if she needed to. If someone I cared about was eating unhealthy, I'd care enough to make a suggest about a diet change, especially since I'm a Nutrition major, I realize how important it is. I wouldn't force anyone though. It's one thing if it's for health, but another if it's only about weight.


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## awkwardsilent (Jun 14, 2012)

Well I don't think you can or should control what she eats BUT I do know that even as friends we bug the vegetably challenged boys in our clique(One of my friends swears her husband has a phobia of vegetables...) . This girl is rare, I don't really know any women who don't love their veggies and healthy foods (I love my veggies I also love my carbs,and sugars... and therein lies my problem lol). I also like a Steak and I also like Fries, TBH if I am going out to a steakhouse, sometimes I want a steak with a baked potato and yes, the brocolli despite the fact they've slathered it with butter. I get that that is more calories than I should eat in an entire day let alone a meal but sometimes you just want what you want. As long as its not a frequent occurance I don't see the problem. 

I like the cooking for her suggestion, I suggest easing her into it. Example including something like spinach in a caserole dish where it isn't obvious etc. But I don't think it can be forced. 

That said honestly if I ever find a partner I will be THAT girl who cooks healthy all the time. I think if you are the one doing the cooking you can chose what to cook but you can't force her to eat healthy. You can genuinely discuss your feelings, that you care about her and you want her to be around for a long time... but yes ultimately the decision is hers. 

And if your lifestyles don't meet up... you can't really change anyone to be with you.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Paper Samurai said:


> Surely you can't equate genetics that you have no control of with weight; something you have full control of (barring a medical condition)


I don't think people really have that much control over their weight. Hunger (and desire for tasty food) is hard to overcome. If it was easy to control you wouldn't see fat women since women for the most part care deeply about their appearance.


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## awkwardsilent (Jun 14, 2012)

komorikun said:


> I don't think people really have that much control over their weight. Hunger (and desire for tasty food) is hard to overcome. If it was easy to control you wouldn't see fat women since women for the most part care deeply about their appearance.


Quoted for truth, if it was that easy I'd be healthy :-| I keep struggling but... refined carbs are WAY too easily attainable in North America. I am really cutting down on them, but they still make their way into my diet. :no


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

komorikun said:


> *I don't think people really have that much control over their weight*. Hunger (and desire for tasty food) is hard to overcome. If it was easy to control you wouldn't see fat women since women for the most part care deeply about their appearance.


This is a really contentious issue, but even those that share your line of thinking concede that there is at least some control over weight.

Thining/greying hair is basically just time passing by. No one can do anything about that.


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## polkaspot (Oct 30, 2012)

How long have you been dating? If some guy I'd been seeing for a few months started trying to force me to change my diet and eat food that made me gag I'd be insulted. If it were someone I'd been dating for a couple years and he knew my diet was impacting my health and keeping me from living life to the fullest... Well, that would be another thing entirely.

Going only by what you said in the first post, you come across as selfish. If you'd said you wanted her to eat healthier because you wanted her to be healthy and stay around for a while, that would be one thing. But you didn't say that. You said you were worried about what she'd look like 7 years from now. So yeah, that comes off as a little selfish.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

Canucklehead said:


> You are doing it all wrong, you need to get her a bib, and while you are at the restaurant you get the peas and carrots on a wide soup spoon. Then you say, "here comes the aeroooplaaaannnne", and pop the veggies into her mouth.
> 
> Works every time.


I would love to go to dinner with you.


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## Double Indemnity (Aug 15, 2011)

Mr Dude said:


> No offensive, it's kinda a douche move unless they're cramming 5 big macs a day down their throats. I'd hate being in a relationship with a health nut that is telling me what to eat every day.


This.


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## elvin jones (Dec 12, 2011)

My ex girlfriend would always order salads or light entrees but then would take huge bites out of my burger or steak and wipe out my fries. That pissed me off so much. Just be thankful your gal doesn't steal your order.


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

leonardess said:


> I would love to go to dinner with you.












I'm available, sexy lady. :teeth


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## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

Well, okay.

I think it's nice to support your partner and encourage him or her to make positive changes.

But at the same time, I don't want anyone telling me I can't eat 2 pounds of candy a week, you know? Figure I can manage myself just fine in that regard.


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## niacin (May 26, 2012)

You can't change people. If you don't like her eating habits (personally, I'd be turned off as well) then say so and break up with her if it bothers you that much. She won't change unless she wants to.

She has a right to eat how she wants and you have a right to date someone with whom you are compatible.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

stylicho said:


> I'm trying to get my girlfriend to eat healthier. I try to get her to eat salads, vegetables, and the like. She promised she would eat half a carrot last night but was only able to finish like one inch of it lol. Now, this is how it all began. I found out she didn't eat very healthy when we went out and ate at a restaurant for the first time. She ordered a steak. Salads customarily come with the steak but she switched it out for fries. She said she didn't eat salads. To be honest, I was flabbergasted. I never heard of a person never eating salads. Am I being too hard or should a partner expect the other partner to eat healthy? She is nine years older than I am and she wasn't overly attractive when we first met, although she has a nice can lol. We just had similar interests. *But I can't help but wonder what she's gonna look like in 7-10 years if she doesn't eat vegetables and stuff*. Plus, she said she would gag if necessary to be with me. She isn't trying to gag very hard when she can't eat more than an inch of a carrot lol. Any help would be appreciated.


:lol


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

It is not your concern what she eats. Leave it.


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## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

I found something interesting regarding picky eating that has made me less pushy about the subject. Apparently it might be related to obsessive compulsive disorder http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/booster_shots/2009/07/adult-picky-eaters-something-to-chew-on.html. But I told her I can't deal with the bad breath no matter what. I don't care if she cries I won't put up with tales from the crypt breath. Luckily she's working on that.


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## BKrakow (Jul 8, 2010)

run away and never look back.


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## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

BKrakow said:


> run away and never look back.


Wish I was the type of person who could do that but one little tear and a snivel and I'm heartbroken lol. I just couldn't understand picky eating because I grew up hungry so now I down anything on my plate. I never understood "texture". What does texture have to do with what goes down your throat. But obsessive compulsive makes sense out of it all.


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## mooncake (Jan 29, 2008)

polkaspot said:


> How long have you been dating? If some guy I'd been seeing for a few months started trying to force me to change my diet and eat food that made me gag I'd be insulted. If it were someone I'd been dating for a couple years and he knew my diet was impacting my health and keeping me from living life to the fullest... Well, that would be another thing entirely.
> 
> Going only by what you said in the first post, you come across as selfish. If you'd said you wanted her to eat healthier because you wanted her to be healthy and stay around for a while, that would be one thing. But you didn't say that. You said you were worried about what she'd look like 7 years from now. So yeah, that comes off as a little selfish.


I agree with this. If someone's diet seems to be really terrible, to the point where you're very concerned about their health, and you've been together a while, then I'd say by all means (politely!) bring up your concerns. But I don't really think anyone should push their partner to change their diet if they don't want to. It's not your business.

The way you talk about your girlfriend comes across as a bit weird to me, though. I mean, if my boyfriend was writing stuff like this about me... "she wasn't overly attractive, but she has a nice can" I'd probably feel quite hurt and insulted. If appearance and dietary habits are that important to you, you're probably better off finding someone else more compatible.


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## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

mooncake said:


> I agree with this. If someone's diet seems to be really terrible, to the point where you're very concerned about their health, and you've been together a while, then I'd say by all means (politely!) bring up your concerns. But I don't really think anyone should push their partner to change their diet if they don't want to. It's not your business.
> 
> The way you talk about your girlfriend comes across as a bit weird to me, though. I mean, if my boyfriend was writing stuff like this about me... "she wasn't overly attractive, but she has a nice can" I'd probably feel quite hurt and insulted. If appearance and dietary habits are that important to you, you're probably better off finding someone else more compatible.


Yeah maybe that does sound a little bit shallow. Sometimes I try to make light of things which I probably shouldn't.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

Canucklehead said:


> I'm available, sexy lady. :teeth


I will bring the bib, you bring the sippy cup.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

Eating salads aren't healthy if you eat them with dressing. Also, if you're eating crap food most of the time, eating veggies doesn't mean you're eating healthy.

Like it was suggested earlier, offer to cook for her. She'll love it (if you're a good cook) and it'll get her to eat healthy.


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## Guldove (Oct 17, 2012)

Eating healthy isn't just eating vegetables. There's a reason vegetarian diets need supplements, and that's because the human body needs a lot more than foods like fruits and vegetables, and while my knowledge is a little outdated there's a lot of talk about the levels of natural sugar in fruit. We need a much wider range of food (carrots don't have, say, protein), and things like portion size and other lifestyle habits affect our bodies and appetites, too. 

Steak isn't particularly unhealthy and fries are fine on occasion; that sounds like a load of hogwash about how women are supposed to be dainty little lettuce-nibblers.

I don't think you know very much about nutrition if you think salads and carrots is the health ideal, though steak and fries every other day is admittedly terrible for you. Iceberg lettuce, very common in salads, has crap for nutritional value.

If you want your partner to prioritize aging well, it's only considerate that you make a mutual diet plan since it's an ongoing effort and having someone else eating junk in the house in front of them can be an unfair temptation. Research from a respected source or consult a professional, and consider learning to cook genuinely nutritious meals at home.


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## John316C (May 1, 2011)

unless shes eating McDonalds or lots of processed foods. i see the mcdonalds meat.. i once worked there and despite uts healthy advertising it aint healthy. there are addatives or some kind of bull**** they use to maintain freshness and crap and let me tell you it is unhealthy...

if shes eating anything else it wont matter really.

unless shes eating lots of processed foods it TRIVIAL compared to what she can grow into by EXERCISING.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

When possible, I always choose fries or some other carb-based side over salad. I hate salad. My cholesterol and glucose levels are normal and I'm not overweight. I don't see why I should force myself to eat salad. I would like to have ripped abs. But I would be miserable if my dinner was always meat plus salad or vegetables. Not sure if not being able to enjoy food is worth the sacrifice for ripped abs.



komorikun said:


> You can encourage healthy eating but trying to push it is annoying. Why don't you cook for her or something? Not everyone likes salads. Do you eat a lot of vegetables yourself?
> 
> I've never had a guy bother me about what I ate. Only had one ex that really hated it if I drank even though I'm a pretty happy drunk. That caused tension in the relationship. He was kind of a control freak.
> 
> I take that back I had one ex complain about how I never cooked even though he didn't cook very much himself. His mom cooked for him most of the time. So it was like do as I say but not what I do.


That guy probably wanted you to replace his mom as far as domestic duties go. lol.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

The way you talk about her is concerning. Doesn't seem like you respect her. Probably headed for dysfunction.


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## Unkn0wn Pleasures (Nov 24, 2011)

stylicho said:


> I'm trying to get my girlfriend to eat healthier. I try to get her to eat salads, vegetables, and the like. She promised she would eat half a carrot last night but was only able to finish like one inch of it lol. Now, this is how it all began. I found out she didn't eat very healthy when we went out and ate at a restaurant for the first time. She ordered a steak. Salads customarily come with the steak but she switched it out for fries. She said she didn't eat salads. To be honest, I was flabbergasted. I never heard of a person never eating salads. Am I being too hard or should a partner expect the other partner to eat healthy? She is nine years older than I am and she wasn't overly attractive when we first met, although she has a nice can lol. We just had similar interests. But I can't help but wonder what she's gonna look like in 7-10 years if she doesn't eat vegetables and stuff. *Plus, she said she would gag if necessary to be with me.* *She isn't trying to gag very hard when she can't eat more than an inch of a carrot* lol. Any help would be appreciated.


:con Gag?


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## louiselouisa (Jul 12, 2012)

Switch your girl with you and salad with something you don't like, is it selfish to you?


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

Unkn0wn Pleasures said:


> :con Gag?


If it's the type of gag that I'm thinking about, why the hell are you so concerned about her eating habits? I'd rather have a girlfriend who gags like a good girl and eats steak and french fries. Than a vanilla girlfriend who eats salad and veggies. lol.


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## Droidsteel (Mar 22, 2012)

stylicho said:


> To be honest, I was flabbergasted. I never heard of a person never eating salads.


When some people go to a resturant, they want to eat.. Not graze.


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## lilyamongthorns (Aug 13, 2012)

Maybe I'm just being too picky, I don't know, but I am pretty health conscious and I don't think I would be able to date someone who was not interested in changing their poor diet.

Also, take for example, a person is battling with health issues that can be treated with proper diet, but they refuse to make the change. I've seen it cause a lot of burdens for family members. So something to consider.

-Lily


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## HanginInThere (Nov 5, 2012)

My husband never liked veges much coz he grew up on steamed veges, mashed potato and meat, but over the years I have experimented with different recipes and figured out that veges taste so much better in Asian dishes- stir fries, noodle salads, etc because of the sauces they use. When we lived in Asia hubby couldn't get enough of the veges. Then we came home and went to his parents house for a traditional roast, with steamed veges and gravy....it just wasn't the same..love the roast meat but steamed veges..come on! Especially when they are from a frozen pack and then heated...gross.

I love cooking Korean, Vietnamese and Thai food at the moment. There is a Korean dish called bibimbup which is delicious!

Also, I try to make fresh fruit smoothies with berries, etc..he loves it now...but it took several years or persistence and not forcing him.


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

This makes me wonder about the lady in Michael Bloomberg's life. "Honey, I think your beverage is too large."


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## Unkn0wn Pleasures (Nov 24, 2011)

phoenixwright said:


> If it's the type of gag that I'm thinking about, why the hell are you so concerned about her eating habits? I'd rather have a girlfriend who *gags like a good girl* and eats steak and french fries. Than a vanilla girlfriend who eats salad and veggies. lol.


...Even more confused now. :sus I hope by gag you don't mean throw up.


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## Amorphousanomaly (Jun 20, 2012)

There's a difference between enjoying quality food and being a pig. Once I saw my sister's girlfriend eat cold gravy with a spoon. Fat or skinny, that's a huge turn off. A partner with a healthy diet and attitude toward exercise is much more appealing.


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## introvert33 (Jun 23, 2010)

I kind of sympathize with the OP, but what I read was that he was concerned about her health and having a variety of food, not that he only wanted her to eat salads for the sake of what she will look like in 10 years. I my be reading my own view into his post though. 

I have a boyfriend that doesn't eat as healthy as I would like either. He on the other hand, would like to make some changes, but just hasn't and so doesn't have the taste for it. For people that say to leave it alone, I would remind them that if you are serious with someone you end up eating together all the time. You're sharing food, and a concern for future health is reasonable. Plus, I'm not a health nut, so I conform to the trend that couples are more likely to indulge because you have an tempter and accomplice (I want to look out for myself too).

I also know that part of it is I like a wider variety of food and simply want to share that with him, not that its necessarily all about health, so I try not to make him miserable eating food he doesn't like. I push healthier choices sometimes, and let it go much more of the time. I think it would be nice if we're both on the same page about encouraging each other to eat healthier, I definitely have a sweet tooth myself.


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## Screenaddict (Feb 4, 2012)

I have to say this is one of the most pathetic whiney threads I have ever read. I must also point out that you couldn't give a flying **** about your girlfriends health only what her appearence is like and how many layers of flab she has now or will have in the future. This definatley isn't love or you wouldn't be bringing up such a minor problem, if it can be called a problem at all. Loads of people eat high in fat foods but if you care about that person then none of this would matter. You dont even sound like you have any respect for her. 

If you wana be decent in any way (which I doubt) you would break it off with her now because it would be worse for her in the future. The more you lead her on the more she will get hurt. If people do want to change thier habits they cant be forced into it, also they have to do it for themselves not anybody else and in thier own time. This kind of thing wouldn't help anybody it would only cause her to feel more pressured therefore more unhappy with herself and within the relationship, she would feel asthough she is a failure if she didnt suceed (which isnt easy to do) because she feels like she has to do this to impress you and gain your love which is unhealthy in other ways whichever way you slice it. This is wrong on so many levels........just stop it o.k!!:no


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Would it be gross to eat a pat of butter by itself at a restaurant?


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## ManOfFewWords (Mar 20, 2012)

komorikun said:


> Would it be gross to eat a pat of butter by itself at a restaurant?


It would be gross _not _to.


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## HanginInThere (Nov 5, 2012)

I saw a sign for deep-fried mars bars the other day. Sound like a heart attack in waiting!


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## slushie87 (Jul 28, 2011)

mooncake said:


> I agree with this. If someone's diet seems to be really terrible, to the point where you're very concerned about their health, and you've been together a while, then I'd say by all means (politely!) bring up your concerns. But I don't really think anyone should push their partner to change their diet if they don't want to. It's not your business.
> 
> The way you talk about your girlfriend comes across as a bit weird to me, though. I mean, if my boyfriend was writing stuff like this about me... "she wasn't overly attractive, but she has a nice can" I'd probably feel quite hurt and insulted. If appearance and dietary habits are that important to you, you're probably better off finding someone else more compatible.


I agree. If eating healthy is that much of a big deal to you, why choose to start a relationship with someone that could care less about it in the first place?
She has to want it for herself.


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

My boyfriend's overweight and I've commented on it, but I don't go forcing salad and veggies down his throat when he's sleeping or demand that he do so when awake <_<;

Generally though, it's up to each individual what they choose to eat. If you can't accept her for who she is, then don't date her. Don't force her to eat something she doesn't want to eat :3 I'm sure there's plenty of health nuts out there you can take on a date to a cabbage patch or something.


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## Donnie in the Dark (Mar 15, 2011)

You can encourage someone to eat healthily..... but you can't make them, and if you persist when they are resisting it will end badly.


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## Donnie in the Dark (Mar 15, 2011)

komorikun said:


> Would it be gross to eat a pat of butter by itself at a restaurant?


 I love peanut butter by itself...... I am pretty damn healthy, but have to be careful buying peanut butter, because I do NOT enjoy it responsibly .


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## godhelpme2 (Apr 4, 2012)

wanting her to diet so she can be healthy is one thing, but it sounds like you just want her to eat healthy for the sake of her appearance. :/


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Donnie in the Dark said:


> I love peanut butter by itself...... I am pretty damn healthy, but have to be careful buying peanut butter, because I do NOT enjoy it responsibly .


I eat peanut butter too but I was talking about actual butter.


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## Donnie in the Dark (Mar 15, 2011)

komorikun said:


> I eat peanut butter too but I was talking about actual butter.


I misread. Not that I can disapprove of you eating actual butter by itself.... it is nearly the same thing. Seems strange to me, but probably because I always buy margarine- no one would want to eat that on its own.


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## purplerainx3 (Apr 28, 2010)

Eating salads doesn't make you healthy....


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