# Do you ever regret telling your therapist something?



## Ltsax (May 28, 2012)

After a lot of contemplation, I decided to tell my therapist about by self esteem issues (mostly dealing with my appearance and social awkwardness due to my speech disorder and shyness). After taking forever to actually get the words out, I couldn't make eye contact with him at all. Most of the time I make an effort to glance up every once in awhile because that is one of the things I have been trying to improve on. But this time, I just couldn't! I felt like if I looked him in the eye I would burst out into tears, which I refuse to do in front of anyone. Now I have been thinking about that session constantly and it is causing me a lot of pain/anxiety. Now I wish I had not said anything, as anyone had a similar experience?


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## Buerhle (Mar 6, 2006)

I've never been to therapy, But I have def regretted telling people stuff. Now I hardly say much.


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## Buerhle (Mar 6, 2006)

And had that same anxiety afterwards.


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## Johnsonss (Oct 8, 2012)

therapy is not just about problems!! after the first few meetings you and your therapist won't always be talking about problems...


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## Luctor (Aug 10, 2012)

Ltsax said:


> After a lot of contemplation, I decided to tell my therapist about by self esteem issues (mostly dealing with my appearance and social awkwardness due to my speech disorder and shyness). After taking forever to actually get the words out, I couldn't make eye contact with him at all. Most of the time I make an effort to glance up every once in awhile because that is one of the things I have been trying to improve on. But this time, I just couldn't! I felt like if I looked him in the eye I would burst out into tears, which I refuse to do in front of anyone. Now I have been thinking about that session constantly and it is causing me a lot of pain/anxiety. Now I wish I had not said anything, as anyone had a similar experience?


Therapy is about being as open and candid as possible. Trust me, they've heard a lot worse stuff than yours.

Everything you've posted above, share with your therapist. It's his job to put you at ease and to assure you that he isn't judging you negatively. Talking about stuff like that is exactly what therapy is about. He'll help put it into perspective for you. When you share something like that with someone, and they don't make any negative assumptions about you, it makes you feel so much better.

Therapy is a safe place where you get to share the crazy stuff that goes on in your head that you can't share with anyone else.


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## retroplex (Oct 11, 2012)

Not to be mean or rude to you, but don't you feel comfortable with your shrink? What I mean is that, this person is someone you can tell anything about you and what you feel like inside and out with out any judgement. Again, I don't want to press on any kind of foul response but I, myself, am looking into going into seeing someone about my stuff. I was told by my doctor that I should find someone that I can trust and feel comfortable with.


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## Ltsax (May 28, 2012)

retroplex said:


> Not to be mean or rude to you, but don't you feel comfortable with your shrink? What I mean is that, this person is someone you can tell anything about you and what you feel like inside and out with out any judgement. Again, I don't want to press on any kind of foul response but I, myself, am looking into going into seeing someone about my stuff. I was told by my doctor that I should find someone that I can trust and feel comfortable with.


Honestly I am fairly comfortable talking to him. The thing is, I told him things that I would never tell anyone else (not even my sister). So I felt very uneasy and vulnerable. However, as more time passed since that session, i do feel a lot better because he already knows my secrets so I have nothing else to be worried about telling him.


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## Killer2121 (Jul 12, 2012)

Hell yes! I told mine about my HOCD (homosexual OCD) way too soon. It was only 2 sessions in.


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## GammaRadiation (May 21, 2012)

Killer2121 said:


> Hell yes! I told mine about my HOCD (homosexual OCD) way too soon. It was only 2 sessions in.


Dude! Wow, if you really have that, and talked about it 2 sessions in, I could see how a therapist would totally mess up with it.

When I talked to a counselor last week, I think I told them way too much at once. It made me feel so negative, I feel like I'm making things worse.


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## ahita (Oct 14, 2012)

Yes i've felt like that. Usually i go home and stay in bed and feel terrible about myself. but it passes after a few days.. I think it helps to tell your therapist about these feelings.


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## Ltsax (May 28, 2012)

ahita said:


> Yes i've felt like that. Usually i go home and stay in bed and feel terrible about myself. but it passes after a few days.. I think it helps to tell your therapist about these feelings.


Its nice to know that I'm not alone. Even though I know its the therapist's job to listen to my problems, I do think it is possible to tell them too much at once.


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## AggieMay (Oct 10, 2012)

Ltsax said:


> Its nice to know that I'm not alone. Even though I know its the therapist's job to listen to my problems, I do think it is possible to tell them too much at once.


Yes I agree with this.
The first session I had put me off after what I said they wanted me to go to another assessment and re-start medication, neither of which I was willing to do, so I cancelled it.:um Well I think it's for the best. I think sometimes I can expect too much of these people...


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## simian4455 (May 17, 2012)

I told her I didn't have any money to pay for the session. Regrettable that I was ushered out. Should have waited for the end of the session.


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## ryobi (Jan 13, 2009)

^lol


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## Secretaz (Sep 10, 2011)

I think I should have never told my therapist about the issues I have with my appearance. I told her I think I look disgusting and some details, now she gives me compliments of my looks all the time. I'm so sick of her doing that...


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## Joe (May 18, 2010)

I haven't but I regret telling stuff to my school because they are incredibly careless about things "Hey Joe hows your speech therapy going" "Joe, depressions not an excuse".

...Obviously I use depression as an excuse when not handing in homework and am really grateful for them asking/shouting this in the corridor. Lucky if anyone did overhear they either didn't know me or had the respect to keep it quiet.


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## Ltsax (May 28, 2012)

Secretaz said:


> I think I should have never told my therapist about the issues I have with my appearance. I told her I think I look disgusting and some details, now she gives me compliments of my looks all the time. I'm so sick of her doing that...


The same thing happened to me lol. I don't know if the compliments he gives me are real or not.


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## RogerPezman (Sep 15, 2012)

I'm not sure if this would fit in this topic, but I do have a counselor whom I talk about what's going on in my life; and he would give me the best honest advice he can give -- he's very smart, has a lot of experience, and he wrote a lot of books; so I have no reason to doubt him :lol. He never did anything to make me feel bad for what I do. I did tell him what I felt were some of the biggest factors that have affected me socially -- i.e. what interests me, what attracts me, and what my goals REALLY are. But no, he never made me feel bad although when I told him I have a fetish, he replied with "now, fetish is a harsh term to give,"; but of course, I replied with as much confidence as I can "It is what it is. It's what has attracted me, since I was a child," -- It's part of his job to listen, so maybe he is not very updated on the whole 'fetish' thing yet; but he's open for discussion . 
I like to think of myself as a hero for sharing because I feel it gives society justice. Ever noticed that more people are becoming more accepting of what was considered abnormal and unhealthy -- i.e. homosexuality, autism, etc.?


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## Myluckystar (Sep 29, 2012)

Omg I have! I shouldn't have told her something, but I was realllyyy paranoid about it and I was like I HAVE to tell someone.  But when she kept asking me questions about it later I thought to myself that I shouldn't have.


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## lavandula (Oct 3, 2012)

this is just my opinion but I don't think it was a bad thing telling your therapist about your self esteem issues. after all that person is your therapist. you can try talking to him about how you felt about telling him too. maybe it also depends on who it is.. I've only had one therapist and I guess I got pretty lucky with her. you probably just have to find someone who's right for you. I told my therapist a lot of things that I wanted to work on and things that bothered me and she's helped so much. I hope it goes the same for you. good luck.


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## karunaji (Oct 17, 2012)

simian4455 said:


> I told her I didn't have any money to pay for the session. Regrettable that I was ushered out. Should have waited for the end of the session.


LOL. With such attitude she wouldn't have helped you anyway so no need to regret it.

I definitely don't think that therapists should work for free. However, in the given circumstances it was rather cruel thing to do. How can one be a therapist if she doesn't have some empathy? She could talk with you at least some more time and/or suggest other ways of getting help like support groups or something.


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## tbyrfan (Feb 24, 2011)

Secretaz said:


> I think I should have never told my therapist about the issues I have with my appearance. I told her I think I look disgusting and some details, now she gives me compliments of my looks all the time. I'm so sick of her doing that...


Same exact thing happened to me when I was going through therapy. It's been almost 3 years since i've been to a therapist, and I don't go for that reason. Compliments on my looks (especially from a female) aren't going to magically change the way I feel about myself. I need coping skills, not compliments.


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## itsjustin (Oct 21, 2011)

When I had hookups month after month because I "needed proof I wasn't ugly." I forget the psycho's response, but I guess I was looking for sympathy. What he said made sense, I just wasn't ready to accept that truth. In the end, he was right, but I still hated myself for saying it. At least I got it off my chest after keeping it bottled up for so long.


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## Greenwick (Oct 12, 2012)

I regret saying I had issues with finances (namely being poor.). What I wanted was help dealing with the anxiety that crops up around it, which isn't always rooted in reality. For that part she was going to help me learn about financial help in the area - which is great for someone who doesn't know about helpful programs, but I am already adept at finding them. The financial anxiety has always been bad, not just when my income really went down.

 Of course it wouldn't have been a problem if I had the communication skills to explain what I actually needed. But if I had those, I would likely have fixed my problems by now.


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## alien88 (Nov 1, 2011)

absolutely not, and I have told my therapistS a LOT of things ...even some of my sexual fantasies!! after all I think that's what therapy is all about, venting. I've seen many therapists, wasted a lot of money just to realized I'm the only person who can cure me, a therapist is someone u pay ALOT just to listen to you, so make sure to let it all out!


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