# Do you ever feel like everyone is looking at you and judging you?



## thegeekinthepink (Sep 24, 2010)

Whenever i go to the store, or even walking around in school, i always feel like everyone is looking at me. I also send to speak really quietly when i'm at a public place with someone because i don't want anyone to hear our conversation. This usually results in them saying "What?" or leaning in close with their ear toward me.

sometimes when someone passes me, i swear i can see them turn their head and look at me as they pass by. I don't know if it's just an illusion or not.


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## Aedan (Jul 21, 2011)

*ring* *ring* *ring*

Agent Mallone ? Yeah, we've got a problem here.

Subject 302535, A.K.A. "thegeekinthepink", knows that we've been following him.

I repeat, subject 302535 KNOWS that he's being followed !


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## jim276 (Jul 29, 2011)

i feel like this all the time when i'm out...probably just being paranoid but i always think people are looking at me and judging me


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## kilgoretrout (Jul 20, 2011)

Yes! I think I'm just a paranoid person in general though. In my mind, I usually tell myself in public: "No one is looking at you, get over it!" But I actually have made eye contact with people who were looking at me which makes me even more paranoid... what are they thinking?! What are they looking at?! Wish I knew.


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## Podee (Aug 4, 2011)

Yeah it's like whenever you're in public there's a spotlight on you and as irrational as it is you just can't help but feel all eyes are on you and everything's being scrutinized. You just need to try and tune it out though which gets easier with practice. Like if you're walking about in public focus on where you're going and what you're doing and pay no attention to others around you because they're not paying you any attention.

The being self-conscious about having convos in public, well don't know about that. I can't stand being on public transport and having a conversation knowing those around can listen in. I would think oh they're too wrapped up in themselves so won't be listening and judging, but then I think of all the times I overhear people's conversations and how I judge them :s Guess it doesn't matter though, who cares what strangers think? Can't be perfect in every single persons eyes.


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## BostonB (Oct 12, 2008)

The best thing any therapist ever told me is that evryone does look and judge in their head, that's just how people are. But they forget about it in 3 seconds while we obsess about it. Her point was that it's not that people are looking, because they are, we all do, It's just that we dont take it the same way other people do. Most of the judgements people make about strangers are really about themselves, not us. The world isnt going to change for us, because we're the ones with the problem.


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## rockyraccoon (Dec 13, 2010)

BostonB said:


> The best thing any therapist ever told me is that evryone does look and judge in their head, that's just how people are. But they forget about it in 3 seconds while we obsess about it. Her point was that it's not that people are looking, because they are, we all do, It's just that we dont take it the same way other people do. Most of the judgements people make about strangers are really about themselves, not us. The world isnt going to change for us, because we're the ones with the problem.


Very well said, we tend to obsess about things. I don't really feel that people are judging me in public, but I feel that people talk about me behind my back because I've never had a girlfriend.


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

some people are judging you.... strangers "people watch" all the time. if you are a human being, you are getting judged, no way around it. best to waste time worrying more about things you can control.


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## DJKav (Jun 23, 2011)

I get the feeling that people look at me all the time. The bad thing is that people may think good things about me but i take it as they thinking negatively about me. I am not some celebrity so why should the general public focus on me; however even the slightest hint of observation gets my mind going.


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## IcoRules (Apr 29, 2009)

Sounds a lot like me. I won't even buy certain things when I'm at the store because I'm afraid I'll be judged or made fun of because of them. It's especially hard when I want to go into a place I don't feel like I fit in.


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## flip (Apr 29, 2011)

Yeah I do feel like that a lot. That's why I spent money on some nice clothes. Now I can just say to myself that people are looking at me because they like what they see.


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## Breathing Sludge (Feb 21, 2011)

Every second of my life. That's why I just stare at the floor now.


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## this portrait (Jul 18, 2009)

I've certainly felt like everyone was staring at and silently judging me on many occasions. Lately, though, I don't seem to feel that way, probably because I've been lost in my own little world and have been ignoring most of my surroundings whenever I go out in public.


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## orchidsandviolins (Jul 8, 2011)

Yes. Walking around my college campus was really hard for me. Going to class, I always felt people were judging me and looking at me. Also, if people happened to be staring, I imagined there was something wrong with me, and would quickly fix my blouse, or run my fingers through my hair. 
Even at the store with my sister, I tell her I feel this way. Her reaction, "Oh, stop it. No one's judging you. I hate it when you say that."
Ah well.


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## masterofsadness56 (Jun 3, 2011)

piscesvixen said:


> Um yeah, people look at me and talk about me among group of friends/family all the time :sus. At the mall, subway, on the street, in their cars. I've learned to shrug it off and ignore them. It's always other women who do this too :blank.


 That's because you look like a model lol


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Yes! Everytime I go out I think people are talking about me. When someone looks at me I think they are judging me negatively. If someone laughs and talking quietly I think they are talking about me. Even when I'm in my room and I hear my family talking in the living room and then their voice goes low I think Oh! They are talking about me. I don't look at people in the eye when I'm out only if I have too. Everytime a guy looks at me especially a cute guy I think every time they look at me they think I'm cute orr hoping they think that.


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## aw1993 (Aug 8, 2011)

its weird I don't always feel like they're judging me but I'm an attractive girl(does not help my SA) so guys check me out often and it makes me really self conscious/uncomfortable. also its really weird but I feel like cashiers judge me by what I'm purchasing especially if its food maybe linked to my previous eating disorder


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## Maslow (Dec 24, 2003)

*Why Are People Are Staring At Me?*

Here's an article I wrote about people staring at me:

http://socialanxietygroup.wordpress.com/2011/07/30/why-are-people-are-staring-at-me/


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## stupiditytries (Jan 10, 2011)

My way of coping is to just focus externally and ignore people basically/avoid eye contact. But it's about a focus for me. I have a poor concentration and thus is sometimes difficult for me not to notice imagined/real people's reactions to me.


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## PinkRoxy (Aug 5, 2011)

I feel like people are judging me all the time.
Ive gotten to a stage that I dont even feel comfortable talking about myself to others because I am so unhappy with the lack of achievements I have done. 
But I do believe that high school is the worst as people are so judgemental and if you were different in anyway you would be held to that.


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## stupiditytries (Jan 10, 2011)

cont. I found exercise helps a TREMENDOUS deal in that regard. It calms me and makes me much more focused. But that's an obvious fact.


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## Noll (Mar 29, 2011)

Yeah, it's called social anxiety.


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## Angelbroken (Jun 30, 2011)

Sometimes - I think mainly becuase of the way I look at what style I wear.

Personally I enjoy it. I like the attention =P


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## TheLostCube (Jun 29, 2011)

I have no idea why, but when I get anxiety in public (almost always) I feel my jaw clench up along with the rest of my face. It's like my brain forgot how to control my face muscles or something. I then look for a way to see if my face is as messed up as it feels. I look normal every time, but it makes me act so weird in front of people. I have no idea how to fix or control it.


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## NeonSloaney (Jun 1, 2011)

Hey Obama, nice profile picture  In regards to being judged, I happen to think it's always neutral about me. I'm at the stage where I almost get into a panic attack when I try to conciously break my avoidant personality habits. This includes when I'm being my hypersensitive self. One thing I have learned is to learn a faked realistic smile. Mirroring usually occurs, and then you have to assume you have given other people happy thoughts, their smiling aren't they?


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## xxLambyxx (Aug 2, 2011)

I feel like that even when its just me and my chinchillas in my bedroom... Sometimes i get ultra paranoid and think that theres a camera in my room...


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## StarlightSonic (Jul 12, 2011)

Yes, all the time. Story of my life.


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## shygurl25 (Aug 7, 2011)

yup thats why I tend to only go out around 12 midnight


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## Cole87 (Aug 15, 2011)

Yea and also making a foul out of myself and looking stupid, even those people around me could care less and don't even look. The feeling they might is still there.


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## reaal (Jul 15, 2011)

this is kinda the definition of social anxiety, so yes, this happens to me ALOT. basically all the time lol.


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## mr hoang (Aug 14, 2011)

I think it's just a self conscious thing. In the end it really doesn't matter what they think of you. I try to tell myself that all the time. I can relate though. I have had a post traumatic experience and going out in public makes the anxiety worse. 
Anyways Maybe some of them are just checking you out? Haha.


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## icemocha3 (Nov 18, 2010)

has anyone ever caught someone actually staring at them? I have. I feel like some people can sense my awkwardness/nervousness. I HATE when people look you up and down. LOL No I'm not paranoid that has actually happened to me. But I think when people stare at me it's because they can tell i'm uncomfortable or something, even when I try to act normal, I have caught someone looking. it's really rude. people can be so judgemental.


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## mr hoang (Aug 14, 2011)

I agree. Maybe try telling them off? ""Like what the hell are u staring at?" 
that could take some courage to say but I think it will give you the confidence for next time.


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## Veritastar (Aug 16, 2011)

I'm usually okay most of the time, but sometimes, when I am in a more (sensitive) mood I can get this way.


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## determination (Jul 22, 2011)

I highly recomend Dr Thomas Richard's Overcoming Social Anxiety audio series. Honestly if you have social anxiety and you're not regularly seeing a therapist or using a selfhelp book/audio series and spending time everyday working on your social anxiety (that's the most important thing) you are not seriously addressing this issue. I used to always feel like people were looking at me but after starting the audio series I feel much less like this. I can drive and not feel like people are looking at me at all. Even on public transport I'm pretty much okay, a little anxiety but not much. I even felt like I had the confidence to approach and start a conversation with this attractive girl on the bus. I didn't though because she catches my bus everyday and if I screwed up it would suck having to catch the bus. I'll just wait till I have an opportunity where it doesn't matter if I **** up or not.


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## spacebound_rocketship (Nov 21, 2009)

Yes, but I'm starting to not care


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## beshino (Feb 19, 2011)

Anticipating interaction with other people is really nerve-racking in any situation for me. It's mostly about my personal judgement about myself that kills me. Clothes, haircut, shoes, etc. I obsess about my looks a lot. Plus I think about the people, how they'll judge me, what I'm missing, stuff like that. And... talking. I suck at talking to people. My mind's always blank. Most of the time I think of the most personal things and judgements. My head's crazy. >.<


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## sanspants08 (Oct 21, 2008)

I've just accepted that people are going to be looking at me, at least in my hometown, because I don't visually fit in...and that's alright with me. I'd have to change my style and mannerisms, and I just don't feel like it. It's not an issue that can be changed with therapy, since it's not a perceptual one on my own part.


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## Catherine Cavatica (Feb 2, 2011)

meganmila said:


> Yes! Everytime I go out I think people are talking about me. When someone looks at me I think they are judging me negatively. If someone laughs and talking quietly I think they are talking about me. Even when I'm in my room and I hear my family talking in the living room and then their voice goes low I think Oh! They are talking about me. I don't look at people in the eye when I'm out only if I have too. Everytime a guy looks at me especially a cute guy I think every time they look at me they think I'm cute orr hoping they think that.


^^^^^^^^^^

I'm almost exactly the same


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## OldSchoolSkater (Jun 3, 2011)

icemocha3 said:


> has anyone ever caught someone actually staring at them? I have. I feel like some people can sense my awkwardness/nervousness. I HATE when people look you up and down. LOL No I'm not paranoid that has actually happened to me. But I think when people stare at me it's because they can tell i'm uncomfortable or something, even when I try to act normal, I have caught someone looking. it's really rude. people can be so judgemental.


Maybe they were just checking you out? Looking you up and down is usually a "DAAAAMN she's fine" kind of thing. :yes


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## kiki33133 (Jul 24, 2012)

i feel the same way i have summer school and when i walk in the cafeteria door in the morning i fell like everyone in the cafeteria is staring at me and judging me i dont know if there thinking negative or positive i always think is negative


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## SoWrongItsRight (May 9, 2012)

Everyday


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## TJenkins602 (Jul 18, 2012)

All the time. They probably are judging me. I say F*** them. They can judge me all they want. They don't know me. Especially that hot chick that yelled out SEXY!!! to me? 

You think I'm SEXY you Beyonce lookin chick? Well F*** you!!! Let's go to the back seat!!!


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## TheInsecureSoul (Mar 3, 2017)

okay so i am new here..
every single day i feel like i am being judged..even when i walk through the corridors at college i see groups of girls staring at me continuously from my head to my toe ( i dnt understand why ), i feel like they're looking at my clothes or my hair ( my dressing sense is not very great), they keep staring at me n the minute i walk past them i hear them laughing which makes me feel like they're laughn at me!
its really difficult for me to walk in public when i see people staring at me all d time!


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## jengem (Feb 6, 2017)

I'm always extremely self conscious in public and feel extremely judge. That's why I can never really enjoy myself when out since I'm always wondering and worrying what people are thinking. I'm trying to practice being more in the now but it hasn't been easy.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ppl gotta mind their own beeswax


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## SophiaL (Sep 20, 2014)

All the time.


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## AgapeLove1 (Sep 7, 2013)

Finally! Others who are experiencing the same thing as I am! It totally sucks and I know how you feel. For many years, I thought I was paranoid, or I was giving off some vibe. It's getting ridiculous. Sometimes I really don't feel safe. Sometimes, from the corner of my eye, I'll catch someone giving me the "evil eye" and I know I'm not doing anything! I often get stared down by other guys, even if they're employees at a store! 

If you come up with a solution that REALLY works, then please share it! I've been trying to do the whole "kill 'em with kindness" thing, but it gets really hard to do that when these guys don't let up.


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Yup, I feel like this a lot, whether it's me being outside, inside anywhere busy, etc

Sent from my RCT6213W87DK using Tapatalk


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## cybernaut (Jul 30, 2010)

I really don't give a damn. I look right back at them if they stare too.


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## LonelyLurker (Sep 24, 2016)

I never feel like _everyone_ is looking at me (most people are pretty much invisible to most other people at any given time), but sure people will look at you and judge you, that's just how people are. The key is to realise that there isn't anything inherently negative about judgement, just because someone is giving you their attention it doesn't mean that they disapprove of you (unless they're being very obvious that belief is probably projection).

What helped me get over that feeling was years of going to the gym, I would always hear female voices saying "look at that boy" although I was a fully grown man (unless I was being stalked by a female ninja, the voice was almost certainly in my head). Sometimes people _were_ looking at me but it was hardly ever negative, sometimes they were just looking at what I was doing (I would see them trying to copy it later), sometimes they thought I couldn't handle the weight (I would see the change in their expressions once that had been disproved) and sometimes they were just checking me out (unless there was something fascinating about the plain walls that were behind me).

I look at people sometimes, sometimes they look at me, you form opinions (make judgements) whether they be positive, negative or indifferent and keep it moving. If anything, I'm less likely to look at you if I think negatively of you as I wouldn't want to make you feel uncomfortable (though I don't know if this approach is representative of most people or not).

So as long as people aren't actually trying to hurt you (whether physically or mentally) I wouldn't get too concerned about it (I know, easier said than done).


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## JohnDoe26 (Jun 6, 2012)

BostonB said:


> The best thing any therapist ever told me is that evryone does look and judge in their head, that's just how people are. But they forget about it in 3 seconds while we obsess about it. Her point was that it's not that people are looking, because they are, we all do, It's just that we dont take it the same way other people do. Most of the judgements people make about strangers are really about themselves, not us. The world isnt going to change for us, because we're the ones with the problem.


That's a really great insight by your therapist. Way better than the ones I get, which is absolute denial of my experience.


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## Uniqueme (Mar 22, 2017)

I thought that people were always talking about me. I got SA psychosis .


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