# Im guessing I really must be so f'ing ugly huh?



## SoulAssasins (Nov 2, 2005)

Alright I just hate it so much....anywhere and everywhere I go what the hell are girls problems...it's like they look at me dont smile or say anything...seriously I know im f'ing horrendous so why brag it in my f'ing face....********!


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## nakedshrew (Dec 5, 2004)

Sounds like your attitude might be the problem mate, if that's what you're thinking around women then you probably don't look very friendly as your negative self-image will be evident in your body language and most girls might be afraid to say something to you if you appear to be angry about something :stu Try to smile more, see how that works.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

SoulAssasins,

Your picture proved that you are not ugly - it's all in the mind. When you display non-happy vibes, people can pick up on it. They don't know what you're thinking, they just think "he must not be having a good day". 

That, and some girls are just weird and into themselves anyway :stu.


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## Nihlanth (Sep 1, 2004)

nakedshrew said:


> Sounds like your attitude might be the problem mate, if that's what you're thinking around women then you probably don't look very friendly as your negative self-image will be evident in your body language and most girls might be afraid to say something to you if you appear to be angry about something :stu Try to smile more, see how that works.


This is correct. Ive seen people who are much older, fatter and not as good looking having absolutely great attitudes who smile and as a result, people respond to them in nice ways. No matter how attractive you are; if you seem to give the impression that you seem angry or anti-social, people will treat you in how you compose yourself. I have noticed that I do this myself quite alot.

If you smile warm heartedly and nod a little (but not in a creepy way) at a girl I can almost garuntee that she will smile back (unless she is extremely shy or has some problems with her own image) so don't be hard on yourself if she doesn't.


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## Carbon Breather (Mar 13, 2005)

You mean you smile and say something and they do nothing or neither you or them do anything and you blame them ?

I don't smile at every girl (or guy) i make eye contact with. Are you supposed to do that !?

How people greet you have 99% to do with your attitude. If a angry model would say hello to someone the response back wouldn't be positive...


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## brokenlight (Mar 10, 2004)

Is it possible that you look like you don't want to be smiled at? You may be giving off an intimidating vibe, like you would reject her smiles. I don't smile at every guy that I think is attractive. I smile at people who look like they are smiling at me, and then I figure that the appropriate thing for me to do is to smile back.


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## lonesomeboy (Aug 29, 2005)

this is one of my main problems. i just cant let myself be 'exposed' by smiling or being friendly first to someone (like a girl). if the person didn't respond or anything i would get so goddam depressed about it and all this negative thoughts would pop in my head (i.e. how ugly iam)


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## thecurerules (May 31, 2004)

millenniumman75 said:


> it's all in the mind. When you display non-happy vibes, people can pick up on it. They don't know what you're thinking, they just think "he must not be having a good day".


 :agree

It's all about the vibes you're giving off. Anxiety/negativity communicates mistrust and creepiness. These things repel people.

However, feeling calm, confident and positive are very attractive qualities and people will pick up on those kind of vibes right away.


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## anis (Jul 23, 2006)

I've read in books that you need to convey warmth and openess to people through body language for them to be receptive to you. 

Relax your body, don't cross your arms or fidget, keep your head up, not down, and always have the faintest hint of a smile on your face.


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## anis (Jul 23, 2006)

I've read in books that you need to convey warmth and openess to people through body language for them to be receptive to you. 

Relax your body, don't cross your arms or fidget, keep your head up, not down, and always have the faintest hint of a smile on your face.


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## medea (May 6, 2006)

Guys can be scary when they're in a bad mood. If you look as if you are, even if you're not it's the same difference to a stranger.


edited to say the same seem to applies to girls, i mean i get most of my dates when i'm having a good day, happy and smiling. i believe you can make yourself happy to a certain extent, you can choose to be happy.


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## ColdFury (Nov 6, 2003)

I wish I knew how to put out positive vibes, I've tried, and they just don't come. The happiness just doesn't appear, even when I try to fake it.


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## medea (May 6, 2006)

The best way I can think of to improve your self-esteem is to do things that you're proud of. I hate washing dishes, I'm always so proud of myself when I force myself to do it, I think well at least I got that done. Find something you can direct your attention on that you want to accomplish and then make yourself do it. It could be anything that is painful and boring that you have been putting off, maybe even just making yourself go grocery shopping or just anything, each person is different.

You're not going to build confidence without doing something that you can be proud of yourself for. Staying in a funk and thinking about all the things you wish you could do is not going to do anything but depress yourself, it's all about action imo.

When youaccomplish something you'll be happier and people will notice that without you even having to fake it. Of course if you're seriously clinically depressed you may need medicine so I don't want to minimize anything.


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## ColdFury (Nov 6, 2003)

> Of course if you're seriously clinically depressed you may need medicine so I don't want to minimize anything.


And even sometimes thats not enough...


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## UnseenShadow (Sep 26, 2004)

I think I have the same problem. Girls will be friendly toward me but eventually my SA ****s it all up. I think the key is to be aware of your physical and facial posture when you're around people. Like celebreties. When you're by yourself however; scowl all you want. 

Yeah, it's a shallow way to look at it (why dont we just be ourselves blah blah), but then again people are shallow and you have to play their game.


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## ShesKrayZ (May 9, 2006)

You are not ugly.

I'm 38 but if I were 18, would I talk to you? No. Why? Because you are good-looking and unless you paid attention to me, I would assume that you have a girlfriend and were not interested in me. Also because I have self-image problems too, I would be afraid that you don't want anything to do with me and that if I so much as smiled at you, you would be grossed out that the "ugly girl" had a crush on you.


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## GaryUranga (Apr 22, 2006)

man theres a WORLD of possibilities out there for you, I used to be SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO bad with girls, about 4 months ago I had a model come up to me and introduce herself, go figure. Click the link in my sig, if I can do it then you also can, its all up here in your head.


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## Buerhle (Mar 6, 2006)

GaryUranga said:


> man theres a WORLD of possibilities out there for you, I used to be SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO bad with girls, about 4 months ago I had a model come up to me and introduce herself, go figure. Click the link in my sig, if I can do it then you also can, its all up here in your head.


ya, alot of fish in the sea


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## thecurerules (May 31, 2004)

GaryUranga said:


> Click the link in my sig


I am going to watch that video everyday for the rest of my life.


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## VelvetElvis (Apr 29, 2006)

I can positively guarantee beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are better looking than I am. Take comfort in that, and try and smile and stuff, too. Unless you're going for that whole mysterious thing.


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## Carbon Breather (Mar 13, 2005)

kingJulien said:


> ya, alot of fish in the sea


Too bad i never catch one because i suck at fishing.

But i rather eat meat. :banana


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## C3P0 (Apr 10, 2006)

SoulAssasins said:


> Alright I just hate it so much....anywhere and everywhere I go what the hell are girls problems...it's like they look at me dont smile or say anything...seriously I know im f'ing horrendous so why brag it in my f'ing face....********!


Relax, I'm reading this book called The Game: Penetrating the secret society of pick-up artists, by Neil Strauss, and I've come to realise, some of the best pick-up artists (PUA's) are very ugly - one guy was described as having a hooked nose with warts all over his face, yet he still scored all the babes. I'm starting to have more faith in technology and routines - sure looks help, but they are not absolutely necessary - other than being neat and smelling properly.

Take your case for example, say you go up to someone or a cashier who doesn't smile. First of all, practise smiling yourself in a mirror, or get comfortable smiling at someone as soon as you make eye contact. This is first step.

Next step, try this routine on a cashier - tell her, if she doesn't smile, "How much would it cost to get you to smile?", and if she does smile, tell her "You look great - just like a Chipmunk" (if she's hot, if she's ugly, just compliment the smile) and that's it. Try this a few times on service ladies for kicks and let us know how it goes.

Another thing: The Alpha-Dominant male ALWAYS smiles confidently when he's entering a place, a room, or sees a chick approaching him from the other side - you LOOK HER IN THE EYES AND SMILE - YOU ARE NOT INTIMIDATED BY HER BEAUTY OR ANYTHING AND YOU DO IT -- You are the Alpha-Male, the Boss, you are in charge, and dont forget that.


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## Your Lover Scrub Ducky (Jul 26, 2004)

You're a much better looking guy than me and ive had a fair amount of girls. It's obviously due to your attitude and outlook dude. Youll have to realize that and make changes for yourself, no one can really teach you...


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## Squizzy (Dec 21, 2004)

> I'm 38 but if I were 18, would I talk to you? No. Why? Because you are good-looking and unless you paid attention to me, I would assume that you have a girlfriend and were not interested in me. Also because I have self-image problems too, I would be afraid that you don't want anything to do with me and that if I so much as smiled at you, you would be grossed out that the "ugly girl" had a crush on you.


 :agree But if you seemed nice or smiled then it would be different.


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## AdamCanada (Dec 6, 2003)

Scrub Ducky said:


> You're a much better looking guy than me and ive had a fair amount of girls. It's obviously due to your attitude and outlook dude. Youll have to realize that and make changes for yourself, no one can really teach you...


Yea, your right. I ain't trying to sound like an *** or anything but ive had quite a few females think im good looking and show interest or whatever but that means nothing if you don't have a good personality/attitude.

I think do have a good personality but i don't really show it to anyone, other then the people ive known for years.


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## SoulAssasins (Nov 2, 2005)

I guess im just really jealous that other guys are "cuter" than me and whatnot....and im sorry if I am conceited even though I don't think I am


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## lonesomeboy (Aug 29, 2005)

C3P0 said:


> Another thing: The Alpha-Dominant male ALWAYS smiles confidently when he's entering a place, a room, or sees a chick approaching him from the other side - you LOOK HER IN THE EYES AND SMILE - YOU ARE NOT INTIMIDATED BY HER BEAUTY OR ANYTHING AND YOU DO IT -- You are the Alpha-Male, the Boss, you are in charge, and dont forget that.


man I wish so much I could do this.....its just soooo hard...What if she doesn't smile back? What if she thinks Iam some weirdo perv? WHat if she gets an 'uugh' gross look on her face? What if I get ignored completetly? I just can't take the chance with all this what if's....


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## scairy (Sep 18, 2005)

> edited to say the same seem to applies to girls, i mean i get most of my dates when i'm having a good day, happy and smiling. i believe you can make yourself happy to a certain extent, you can choose to be happy.


Great post. I seriously need to repeat this to myself everday like 20X.


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## scairy (Sep 18, 2005)

nakedshrew said:


> Sounds like your attitude might be the problem mate, if that's what you're thinking around women then you probably don't look very friendly as your negative self-image will be evident in your body language and most girls might be afraid to say something to you if you appear to be angry about something :stu Try to smile more, see how that works.


I'd say this is correct if he's making decent eye contact. I smile a lot until I'm around a woman that's my age then suddenly I start to think about myself and how do I give a natural pleasant smile that isn't scary looking? If I fake one it will probably look weird. Then the whole eye contact thing.

This stuff is so amazing. The mind games are so powerful. We feel like we have no control but in fact I'm sure we do have control it's just we have ingrained this thought process so deep within us we don't believe it. I wonder if martial arts would help? To break a brick you have to be focussed both physically and mentally and believe that you can do it. Wow way off topic sorry.


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