# Made two new female friends today!



## inVis420 (Jul 15, 2009)

Man what a great feeling . I've had 2 female friends my whole life and out of nowhere today I just made friends with these two cute girls from work. I hate that these random bursts of confidence happen so rarely and randomly. Why can't I be this social more often?


----------



## hushhush (Oct 21, 2009)

inVis420 said:


> Man what a great feeling . I've had 2 female friends my whole life and out of nowhere today I just made friends with these two cute girls from work. I hate that these random bursts of confidence happen so rarely and randomly. Why can't I be this social more often?


congrats!! tell me how to make friends that fast, because i don't know how.


----------



## mind_games (Nov 30, 2008)

Woot! :high5


----------



## its_a_rick (Feb 7, 2008)

Congratz! :clap


----------



## theuprising (Oct 2, 2009)

inVis420 said:


> Man what a great feeling . I've had 2 female friends my whole life and out of nowhere today I just made friends with these two cute girls from work. I hate that these random bursts of confidence happen so rarely and randomly. Why can't I be this social more often?


 psychoanalyze what happened in that situation of confidence. Know now that you have the abilities to be social in any situations, its just that you're stopping youself. In otherwords, you have no social skills you need to learn to become social, you know them already


----------



## forever_dreamer (Jul 8, 2008)

Congrats! I wish I could make one or two male friends. It's nice when you have confidence bursts! I agree with theuprising though.


----------



## inVis420 (Jul 15, 2009)

hushhush said:


> congrats!! tell me how to make friends that fast, because i don't know how.


Well i've worked with them for a while so we've talked here and there so it wasn't that fast really. I just started talking to them and they were smiling the whole time which helped my confidence. Later on in the same night I tried talking to them again and to my surprise we continued to hit it off well. There was lots of joking around which helped me relax and ask them stuff that I normally wouldn't ask. My advice would be to just keep trying to converse with people.....you may fail 4 times (like I have in the past) but that 5th time things may finally work out and you'll have some new friends :yes

Thanks everybody! Feels good to finally have some social success....no depression on a Monday for once!


----------



## Rixy (Oct 4, 2009)

That's great to hear. Hopefully you can make some more friends in the future.


----------



## goodthing (Feb 16, 2009)

That's so great! :clap I know how you feel, with the random bursts of confidence, same thing happens to me. So at least we know we can do it!:yay 
Very happy for you!


----------



## VIncymon (Apr 16, 2009)

Congratulations ...Random bursts of confidence indeed.

Today I managed to come off as a jerk. To one girl I say "no, that girl over there is not my girlfriend." and then I spend the rest of the day dancing with "that girl over there."

In my defense, i certainly wasn't lying. I have never had a girlfriend, and have non presently. Its just that today I somehow found the confidence to grab a girl and dance with her.

Its like this, i go to a party, find Sally, and stay by her the whole time, hitting off and trying not to be clingy. I go off to get a drink and meet Mary, who assumes Sally is my girlfriend. I tell Mary that she is not, but then I go and dance with Sally until the end of the party.

Man i wish I knew how to maintain that state of mind..


----------



## inVis420 (Jul 15, 2009)

Update: Well to my surprise i'm still friends with these girls and i've added one more female friend this weekend . I think my problem before was just that I didn't have enough self-esteem to continue to be comfortable around people. Lately i've been working hard on improving my self-esteem and in turn i've had less negative thoughts. Negative thoughts = bad SA every single time so i've made it a habit to ignore these thoughts. For the first time in a while i'm actually optimistic about getting better and it's mainly thanks to all the things that i've learned on this board.


----------



## sandwich master (Sep 8, 2009)

Believe!


----------



## Emptyheart (Sep 15, 2009)

great job..can u teach me..you sound like a pro hee hee! XD


----------



## inVis420 (Jul 15, 2009)

Emptyheart said:


> great job..can u teach me..you sound like a pro hee hee! XD


haha I wish . I'm basically just putting into action techniques that I learned about online. Obviously, everyone deals with their SA differently but for me I just have to be take more chances and the rest tends to work itself out because people seem to like me.


----------

