# My worst therapy experience ever



## Jessy (Nov 13, 2011)

So i am back in bed right now, after going to see my therapist. She tried to get me to talk about something I didn't want to and I got so embarrassed I started crying and she just kept probing me about what I was feeling and why, and it was horrible. I hate crying in front of people. The more I cry the more embarrassed I get, and then I cry even more...And then finally I couldn't stand it anymore so I got up and left. I have never walked out on anybody before, especially not an authority figure. I usually just endure uncomfortable situations, but this time it was too much. I felt kinda like I was outside of my body, and I just felt my body get up and leave. I hid in the bathroom for 20 minutes, shaking and sweating and in disbelief about what had just happened. When my face wasn't so puffy and red I walked home and got back into bed. What a successful day...Anyway, I don't think I'll ever be able to go back and see her again.

And no, I don't think it is my therapist's fault; I just don't think that she is the right kind of therapist for me because she is quite blunt and a little bit harsh, and I am extremely sensitive so I NEVER feel comfortable or safe with her.


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## Lasair (Jan 25, 2010)

Sometimes part of therapy is to get you in the place where your problem lies in a save environment so the person proving help can see the effects and how to deal with them. This may not be what she was doing as I believe she would have said so first. :squeeze just a thought. I'm sorry your session felt so bad for you.


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## HopefulSeeker (Mar 1, 2012)

I understand what you're saying Jessie. 

I sought help once, and ended up in a group session. First session I joined, everyone - well most people were sharing. There was a moderator of course, the person with the degrees in psychotherapy. 

I listened to some heart wrenching stories, people in situations that seemed so much more insane than my own inconsequential issues. Then the moderator put a fairly significant amount of pressure on to get me to speak. I did not speak, and after that first session, went home, and never went back. I wish I had been ready for it, but at the time, it highlighted the fact that I was not ready for it. 

Some times, you just don't feel safe with people, and even when you do, there is a time when you are ready to talk and that time may not be today. 

You know your own boundary lines, she did not respect them. 

All the best, 

Seeker


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## Shredder (Apr 19, 2011)

Hmmmm sounds like an awful experience. Was this a clinical psycologist? Or just a person that calls themselves a counsellor? What drives me nuts is that these people can do more harm than good. Its situations like what you've had that make it hard to open up to people. I can associate a lot with what you have written. Sounds like you are trying not to place blame but I have to say whoever your therapist is, they dont sound like they are very good at their job. I would expect that in the least they would call to follow up to see how you are going?


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

I think it's good that you walked out, to be honest. From the sounds of it, this wasn't therapy occurring, this was a trauma for you. You know, there is a such thing as therapy traumatizing someone. If a therapist goes too fast into deep stuff, this can negative effects on someone. If "you" feel that you need to go slow with stuff & open up at your own pace, then go see a different therapist that respects this & knows how to handle intense responses/emotions.


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

I just tell the therapist what's on my mind most of the time, like yesterday I told her that I was getting bored of the sessions so she said she will have planned sessions with topics next time


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## ainsleigh (Dec 6, 2011)

Aw I'm really sorry to hear this


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## Jessy (Nov 13, 2011)

Thanks for the replies everyone. My counselor never called me after and I don't think I will go see anyone else, at least not for a while. I'm broke so I was just assigned a therapist through mental health (in canada this is free). But i dunno if they would let me switch to someone else. And even if I did it would be in the same building and it would be really awkward if I ran into my old therapist there, so I'm going to put this off for now. I don't feel too badly about the incident anymore; I have done a pretty good job of blocking it out and making it seem surreal, like it didn't actually happen to me. Anyway, thanks for all your comments and support.


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## ChrissyQ (Apr 15, 2009)

I recomend ppl tell their most embarassing secrets they want help with to therapist don't mind crying it's to be expected it's totally ok if you're going to go to therapy and not open up this way why are you there then that's what you're there for!


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## Kakumbus (Mar 27, 2012)

You can lie to yourself and live in fantasy or face the facts and see the reality.

You choose.


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## blondie27 (Oct 4, 2011)

Hi there, I think it just takes time to find the right therapist for you.My last therapist was lovely but she was a newbie at her job and seemed to think that telling me to just go outdoors and everything would be fine would work, when I tried and had panic attacks She seemed to not know what to do next so I asked my doctor if I could step up a level to something more intense.Im now meeting a nice therapist once a week who, after only meeting me once and talking to me for an hour not only put me at ease but told me that id been wrongly diagnosed the first time around, he seems to understand how my mind works and hes working closely with me to get to the bottom of where it stems from and why I am the way I am.

It sounds to me like shed be perfect for someone else but just maybe not for you, could you ask the person who referred you to her (your doctor) if you could possibly see someone else?

I will agree with what someone said earlier though, its their job to ask these uncomfortable questions in order to find out what makes you tick and as uncomfortable and upsetting that may sometimes be, I think in the end it may do you the world of good to take the burden away from yourself and let someone else deal with it for a while but i understand it can be awful to have to open up to a complete stranger


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## icemocha3 (Nov 18, 2010)

ChrissyQ said:


> I recomend ppl tell their most embarassing secrets they want help with to therapist don't mind crying it's to be expected it's totally ok if you're going to go to therapy and not open up this way why are you there then that's what you're there for!


 Spell check and punctuation please. Thanks


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## theJdogg (Sep 18, 2009)

Yeah, your therapist is likely in the wrong, but I'd still recomend setting up another meeting to discus what happened. You may learn something about yourself. I know that I have a difficult time expressing my emotions to other people which is one of the issues I have in regards to my SA. I'm capable of expression but selfmoniter to the point of stifling the connection. The few times I expressed my true emotions(mostly anger and extreme sadness) where so overwhelming, I could barely handle seeing my therapist again. I still have issues with my display of "weakness," but I'm working on it. I'm not trying to pigeionhole you, but I am giving my experience. If your therapist acts like a dick, then leave and find another. My current one is the best I ever had.


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## kpx0 (Mar 12, 2012)

A good start would probably also be to stop considering your therapist an authority figure. She's someone who's getting paid to help you. You're the patient, you make the rules. She's not an authority to you. The relationship between a therapist and a patient should be mutually respectful. Not an authority-citizen relationship.


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