# Exposure Therapy



## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

My closest friend since highschool pretty much had the same issues I've had all my life, we weren't the most accepted people, and we were easily just shed off as the 'geeks'.


He took an exposure treatment weekend about 2 months ago, and It's as if I've met a new person, he has no fear, no anxiety, he's able to talk to strangers and he's even been on dates.

It took him ages to convince me to take the treatment, and I've signed up for it but I'm really nervous. I don't know if it'll work for me, I don't know if this is the actual answer, and I don't know if I'll be able to go through with it. I know its so easy to just say 'go through with it, and you'll see' but Im petrified.


I'm actually thinking of calling it off all together or just not going to the weekend therapy. I'm not sure this is the right place to post this, but I just want people's thoughts.

Am I actually crazy for thinking of calling it off? There's a money back guarantee, but at this point that's not what im worried about, I'm worried of being in situations that I don't want to be in. Even though I know this might be the cure im looking for


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## Serephina (Apr 13, 2010)

If you can see such a dramatic change in your friend then it seems worth giving it a go. Your mindset may be different from his even though you both had the same 'symptoms' so it may not work for you but you've got this far ...... go on, give it a go and report back to us!


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## akvareller (Feb 26, 2013)

I think you should go! Especially after seeing such a dramatic change in your friend. :] Good luck!


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## hybridmoments (Feb 24, 2014)

You are not crazy for wanting to call it off. It's hella scary, and petrifying, to put yourself out there. However, once you do it, it will become easier. Just thinking about it brings up these automatic negative thoughts and anxiety, which are a b****! But do it. don't go with the expectation that things will be great. Go out there, make mistakes and even look like a fool. And if you are scared, then go at it at your own pace, but don't stop!
I'm on the same boat as you. I am going out more with a group and I am feeling better. 
good luck.


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

Guys thank you for the support I just finished the 2 day treatment. I honestly have no words for what I went through, just wow. I did things I never thought were possible, I spoke to so many strangers, and I was out there for the full weekend ! I didn't back down! I even got a date for this coming weekend ! 


I really don't know where to begin, it was far from easy, even now I'm still shaking with adrenaline as to what I've accomplished. This really has been the best weekend of my life, and I owe it all to my best friend for pushing me to do the therapy, and you guys for keeping me from backing out  



I was given 'homework' after the treatment and told to keep practising every day so I don't relapse, I've made a vow to do so. 




I hope this incredible change lasts, I can't believe the things I did, what a weekend. I'm sorry if I'm too excited I just don't know where else to express this!


Hope everyone had a great weekend !


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## Wildman (Apr 9, 2011)

Interesting, I'm glad to hear it worked out for you.

I'd be curious to hear more about what this treatment was, if you don't mind. What kind of things did they have you do? Was this specifically geared towards people with SA?


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

It's specific to SA.

I had to sign a form that says I'm not allowed to give out the exercise details that we went through. It was basically different types of exercises out in public, and each one was for a different purpose, in the sense that I reached a different goal with each one. The first day was REALLY emotionally and physically draining, I went home and fell asleep by 8 PM, the next day I already felt alot better ( and slight disbelief). It was the second day that I was able to approach a girl and speak to her and then get her number and arrange for a date. I never thought I was capable of something like that.


I can safely say I've never felt this good before, I think it's going to help me interview for a job more of my potential so I can finally quick this dead end desk job ( at Geico). 



If anyone has any more questions I'd be happy to help


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## Randomguy555 (Apr 26, 2014)

That's awesome! Definitely stick with it!


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

Thanks !


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## Wildman (Apr 9, 2011)

timcostas said:


> It's specific to SA.
> 
> I had to sign a form that says I'm not allowed to give out the exercise details that we went through. It was basically different types of exercises out in public, and each one was for a different purpose, in the sense that I reached a different goal with each one. The first day was REALLY emotionally and physically draining, I went home and fell asleep by 8 PM, the next day I already felt alot better ( and slight disbelief). It was the second day that I was able to approach a girl and speak to her and then get her number and arrange for a date. I never thought I was capable of something like that.
> 
> ...


Thanks for the response. Sounds like it was a pretty intense experience, I hope it will have lasting effects.

Does this program have a name, or a website that you are able to share? You've really piqued my curiosity!


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## feels (Jun 18, 2010)

^ I'm really curious about the name of this program as well. Sounds pretty incredible. I'm glad it's working out so well for you. It takes a lot of courage to do something like this. Hopefully things just continue to get better/easier from here on out.


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## digitalbath (Feb 1, 2012)

That sounds incredible! Congrats on the progress. Curious to hear more about it if you decide to continue it. (Also, yes, do you have details on it? Is it just called Exposure Therapy or what?) 

I would definitely look into something like this if there was one near me.


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## SaStar (Mar 5, 2014)

This sounds exactly like what Pickup artist bootcamp. I think it's surprisingly perfect for someone with social anxiety for 3 reasons.

1. Exposure (through behaviour)
2. Mindset (Better and non-anxiety provoking way to process cognition)
3. Social skills.

No therapy I have seen, at least in UK. Even therapists practicing CBT can give exposure or social skill. Only mindset but without other two it's rather ineffective.

I say social skill is important because when we spend most of time like at school avoiding ways to talk, new ways to interact other people are doing it and learning social skills.

For me it hasn't helped with girl and I wasn't able to get number although I guess I did get a kiss? I still have no luck with girls and partly because anxiety with only girls are probably so strong I need to find another way.

Btw when I came back to my home town and meet up with school friends they couldn't believe what I was able to do either they were all blown away.

It helped me with social anxiety massively and it's because of exposure. If you look into research rather ironic thing is to "fix/cure" any phobia including social anxiety you have to get exposed to your phobia in a right way to get your brain desensitized.


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## SaStar (Mar 5, 2014)

Damn I can't seem to edit but if you look around the forum a LOT of people have hints of way they talk about things where they are refering to pick up material. I was really surprised but if you haven't looked into that self-help you wouldn't know.


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## digitalbath (Feb 1, 2012)

Oh god, not this pick up crap again...


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

Hey guys, actually that's a good question I'm not sure if there's a website for it I'll ask and let you know the link ! 


As for the treatment, it was with a Psychiatrist (MD) here in Long Island New York (and also his intern), and the way it works is I went in for my initial evaluation. This process was short but it was just to get a feel for where I was.

Then I was taken out for a total of 12 hours (6 hours saturday 6 hours sunday) doing several exercises while measuring some of my physical responses, and answering a few questions at the beginning and end of the treatment (there was definitely a huge change in the readings, not just the physical ones, I myself felt less anxious as the treatment went on, compared to how petrified I was beforehand).

I have the contact number if anyone wants to call and find out more directly from them.


As for 'pick up', erm, I'm not really familiar with that sort of thing, I guess I can see how exposure can be similar, but then again, you could label any situation in society where you aren't afraid as a potential 'pick up' ? Again I haven't looked into it so I don't really know about that stuff.


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## shysteve32 (Dec 13, 2008)

*Hey great where can I join this bootcamp*

Hi Stephen here from Long Island I am interested in your post. I want the doctors name and number please I want to get over my social anxiety like you have with this doctor. Also how much is the cost just so I know? Please respond I really need thsi 2 day bootcamp


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## ASAR (Sep 14, 2010)

edit


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

Hey sorry I was away for the weekend.


The office number I have is 917 705 3934, you'll get to speak to someone who will explain all the steps on how it works, also there is an evaluation phase before hand just to make sure you are eligible for the treatment course.


I hope that helps !  


Also good luck ! I really hope this works for you like it did for me !


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## Moldorkong (Dec 30, 2013)

Hey everyone, I'm trying to find additional programs to help me over come my social anxiety issues. Just curious, has anyone else tried this program?


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## paulyD (Feb 16, 2011)

timcostas said:


> My closest friend since highschool pretty much had the same issues I've had all my life, we weren't the most accepted people, and we were easily just shed off as the 'geeks'.
> 
> He took an exposure treatment weekend about 2 months ago, and It's as if I've met a new person, he has no fear, no anxiety, he's able to talk to strangers and he's even been on dates.
> 
> ...


don't back away.

go through with it. you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. and you don't have to dive in at the deep end either.

all you have to do is take a few small steps to start off with until you get comfortable. then you can build up to harder things. focus on progress not perfection. and there is no such thing as failure only feedback

imagine standing on top of a high story building and somebody puts a plank of wood across to the next building and asks you to walk across it. naturally you would hesitate because the consequences for falling are catastrophic (i.e death). but what if somebody placed a safety net under the plank of wood ? You jump at the chance to walk across the plank of wood because it wouldn't matter if you fell. if you fell you would simply get back up and have another go

it's the same with exposure therapy. you don't have to do anything you dont want to do. and with the things that you actually do failing is not a catastrophy


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

If you read the other posts I did go through with it and it was very successful 

Also it was exposure therapy 

Thank you for your post though I appreciate it

Here's the website for them http://www.destroysocialanxiety.com if you want to check them out


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

I went ;p It was awesome, check the rest of the thread  

but thank you for your input !


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

Has anyone else tried this? I'd be curious to hear from anyone who's gone through the same experience !

Also if anyone is in New York I would be more than happy to go out with you and help you overcome your anxiety !


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## hypestyle (Nov 12, 2003)

exposure therapy? what is this...


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

It's when you are taken into public to do exercises to help you get over your fears


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## Rayzada (Jul 31, 2014)

Congratulations!!!


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## Recessive J (Feb 18, 2014)

I'd definitely like to try something like this, I'll look into it. I heard it can be pretty useful treating selective mutism as well as SA.

But congratulations


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

Recessive J said:


> I'd definitely like to try something like this, I'll look into it. I heard it can be pretty useful treating selective mutism as well as SA.
> 
> But congratulations


thank you !


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## lazl0w (Jul 27, 2014)

This sounds awesome! I'd love to try it.

Anyone know if there us anything similar in the UK?


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## Kingtk58 (Sep 15, 2014)

*Exposure therapy*



timcostas said:


> It's specific to SA.
> 
> If anyone has any more questions I'd be happy to help


Where do they offer this kind of thing?


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

Kingtk58 said:


> Where do they offer this kind of thing?


In New York City


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## ByStorm (Oct 22, 2013)

I need this here in California.


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

ByStorm said:


> I need this here in California.


When I was there a patient had flown there from San Francisco, so I'm sure it's doable !


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

Lia of Wednesday said:


> This sounds cool but really scary. I think I might call them and just ask them about the treatment. I've been looking for a regular therapist so I might go that route first before this.
> 
> Thanks for sharing this. I'm glad it helped you


I can't lie, it was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do, it was both physically and emotionally tiring and I was very confused through the process.

However, its been a few months now and I've never been happier, it has been an amazing journey with a lot more to come !


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

I'm happy to report that it's been a few months, and i feel fantastic ! 

Granted there are days when I don't feel like going out and socializing, but I've learnt to push past that and get out there ! 

It's been a tough journey, but I'm at a new point in my life right now. I got a new job that I was too scared to apply for back in the day, and even though I'm still learning the ropes, I think I can do this. The pay is better but also they actually respect me, and I feel like I'm finally equal. Like I belong somewhere, if that makes sense. Also things are going really well in my dating life. I have dated a few girls since the program and talking to girls in general isn't as scary as I made it sound in my mind 

I know some people may not really care, but I just wanted to share


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## borntodie19 (Oct 29, 2014)

timcostas said:


> I'm happy to report that it's been a few months, and i feel fantastic !
> 
> Granted there are days when I don't feel like going out and socializing, but I've learnt to push past that and get out there !
> 
> ...


that's very interesting! How long have you been going to therapy?, What often? I'm glad you get better.


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

borntodie19 said:


> that's very interesting! How long have you been going to therapy?, What often? I'm glad you get better.


Its a weekend therapy, with a follow up,it's not an ongoing procedure. I went to it a roughly 5 months ago and I've been feeling amazing since !


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## The Impulsive Fantasy (Nov 16, 2013)

timcostas said:


> Its a weekend therapy, with a follow up,it's not an ongoing procedure. I went to it a roughly 5 months ago and I've been feeling amazing since !


Hey man, i just finished reading your awesome posts and it sounds incredible. I'm from long island as well, are they still doing it? and is the program affordable?


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

The Impulsive Fantasy said:


> Hey man, i just finished reading your awesome posts and it sounds incredible. I'm from long island as well, are they still doing it? and is the program affordable?


I mean it depends what you consider as affordable, the price of the treatment was $3497. The initial $400 dollars is covered by insurance, the rest you have to pay. Like I said I was skeptical at first, but It has probably been the best investment I have ever made in my life. I had wasted a lot more money previously on other forms of treatment, with little result.

You can call them if you want to find out more

Also where abouts in LI ? We might be neighbors


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

timcostas said:


> It's specific to SA.
> 
> I had to sign a form that says I'm not allowed to give out the exercise details that we went through. ...


Why not? I see it is only about money. Typical today, no one shares information, everyone just wants to suck as much money out as possible. I am in Germany, so I cannot use this service anyway, but if it was shared with the world than the scientific society can make progress. But of curse today money is way more important than actually helping people.:|


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## The Impulsive Fantasy (Nov 16, 2013)

The Sorrow said:


> Why not? I see it is only about money. Typical today, no one shares information, everyone just wants to suck as much money out as possible. I am in Germany, so I cannot use this service anyway, but if it was shared with the world than the scientific society can make progress. But of curse today money is way more important than actually helping people.:|


yeah, i hate to say it but it kinda of sounds like that. It's a lot of money i couldn't afford it.


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## The Impulsive Fantasy (Nov 16, 2013)

timcostas said:


> I mean it depends what you consider as affordable, the price of the treatment was $3497. The initial $400 dollars is covered by insurance, the rest you have to pay. Like I said I was skeptical at first, but It has probably been the best investment I have ever made in my life. I had wasted a lot more money previously on other forms of treatment, with little result.
> 
> You can call them if you want to find out more
> 
> Also where abouts in LI ? We might be neighbors


What's their number?

I live in nassau close to ocean side and what about you?


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## forex (Dec 29, 2010)

timcostas said:


> It's when you are taken into public to do exercises to help you get over your fears


i had that once , the guy wanted me to walk in a store singing :|

i told him to shove that exercise up his a.. .
not going to make myself a clown infront of others.


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

The Impulsive Fantasy said:


> What's their number?
> 
> I live in nassau close to ocean side and what about you?


516 252 1111

www.destroysocialanxiety.com i just left my number there and they called me back

as for those saying its just about money, well yea, no one treats cancer for free, its a paid service but you get results.


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## The Impulsive Fantasy (Nov 16, 2013)

timcostas said:


> 516 252 1111
> 
> www.destroysocialanxiety.com i just left my number there and they called me back
> 
> as for those saying its just about money, well yea, no one treats cancer for free, its a paid service but you get results.


no one answered but i did go to the website and left my number, hope they call back. Do they evaluate you over the phone or something?


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

The Impulsive Fantasy said:


> no one answered but i did go to the website and left my number, hope they call back. Do they evaluate you over the phone or something?


It's like an introductory call to see how severe your case is and what is going on with your situation. I know that if someone has addiction problems they suggest other therapists to help overcome that before coming to the treatment. But I'm not exactly sure what the requirements are


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## The Impulsive Fantasy (Nov 16, 2013)

so I like to make an update 
I did leave my number on the website they call me back and they recommended that I should wait for a month to see if I'm better even though I told them that I was in need of help 

Anyways one of the things that got my attention was when I asked about the coverage in the insurance and they told me that the reason why they don't let the insurance cover for the program, (even though they once did) is because they say that people or patience give up too easily on it because it didnt cost them. which I founded very weird and cliche. I was in no economical position to afford the program and ask if they can make an exception but they couldn't, which is fine I suppose. ( I don't think is fair to those who can't afford and are really committed) The program is 3 days, around 2500 and after help. I ask what were the activities they were very secretive about it and didn't want to tell, which is understandable I suppose, it is a business. 

So I won't be going, i will looking for other similar programs hopefully that take insurance or that are affordable.


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## JameMarlowe (Dec 17, 2014)

timcostas said:


> I'm happy to report that it's been a few months, and i feel fantastic !
> 
> Granted there are days when I don't feel like going out and socializing, but I've learnt to push past that and get out there !
> 
> ...





timcostas said:


> It's like an introductory call to see how severe your case is and what is going on with your situation. I know that if someone has addiction problems they suggest other therapists to help overcome that before coming to the treatment. But I'm not exactly sure what the requirements are


 Hey Timcostas, thanks for sharing this experience you had. This is really amazing that there are people doing this and I've been thinking for years that this would be really beneficial.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Yeh, so is nobody else suspicious of this? - Tim makes his first post in a SA forum in a thread where it turns out he had an amazingly good experience with an expensive treatment for SA that is magically better than any other treatment in the entire world? - and ofc, no details of the treatment can be provided.

Not saying the treatment is fake, just that the timing of the posts and the miraculous response is a little fishy no?

This is, bear in mind $3500 for 2 days treatment. I find it very hard to believe that any exposure based treatment can cure SA in such a short period.

From their website:



> The treatment itself is known as Transformational Exposure Therapy, which consists of elements of exposure therapy (in vivo) and pharmacotherapy.
> Exposure therapy is when we take the patient out in public and introduce them into everyday situations and ask them to perform a series of exercises to help them battle their anxiety. Be it speaking to members of the public, talking on the phone, or even public speaking, the treatment is aimed to tackle any social barrier that you may be facing.
> *It is specifically designed to target the main biological reason of social anxiety - dysregulation between the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex*. It typically takes place over two consecutive days and it ends with agreed upon objective outcomes. For example if your social anxiety is linked with approaching people in public or public speaking, at the end of the course you should be able to conquer your particular fear.


Bolded part is quite a claim.

Perhaps I am wrong, just all feels a little engineered to me.

(Btw, exposure therapy is ofc legit, I am not doubting that, but I am doubting this 2 days super cure).


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## timcostas (Apr 23, 2014)

splendidbob said:


> Yeh, so is nobody else suspicious of this? - Tim makes his first post in a SA forum in a thread where it turns out he had an amazingly good experience with an expensive treatment for SA that is magically better than any other treatment in the entire world? - and ofc, no details of the treatment can be provided.
> 
> Not saying the treatment is fake, just that the timing of the posts and the miraculous response is a little fishy no?
> 
> ...


I had been part of another forum but it was inactive, my queries fell on deaf ears so I decided to come here, I'm sorry for sharing my story if it bothers you so much.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

timcostas said:


> I had been part of another forum but it was inactive, my queries fell on deaf ears so I decided to come here, I'm sorry for sharing my story if it bothers you so much.


If I am wrong, and you did post this stuff out of genuine compassion, then I apologise, you should take no offense or ill will from my post (as it doesn't apply to you). You should just consider this to be my own personal error and not be concerned by it.

If I am right though, and this was a cynical and calculated attempt to extort money from vulnerable people, then the exact opposite applies.

Sharing your story isn't what bothers me at all.


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## mardymoo (Jan 8, 2013)

Just sounds like another case of greedy doctors preying on the vulnerable. Over $3000 for 2 days of treatment? Sod that.


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## Genie (May 22, 2013)

Do you know if it's 80% of people have success rate like yours or if it's 20% of people? People with SA tend not to have not much money and investment sounds quite steep. If they do proper CBT for SA which it sounds like it does, I'd say go for it though.


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## Iconclast (Mar 30, 2016)

Do you guys still me in New York?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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