# 30, no career. Move abroad?



## 2litre (Dec 9, 2018)

In many ways my life never got started. Whilst others my age already have careers and children of their own, I have generally drifted along with no direction. I have also missed out on various opportunities such as travel and meeting new people.


I studied physics at university and got the best grades possible, but the degree has not helped me much in the jobs market. As a social anxiety sufferer, I lose out to extroverted people in the interview process. I applied for graduate schemes and got nowhere, because someone else is always more confident or experienced. I have a partially completely masters in nuclear science (nuclear engineering) but have no real passion for this area. I've been rejected for medical school two years in a row.


I hear stories of people moving abroad to gain employment and a part of me thinks it would be a chance to start my life over. I could attempt to teach English. Maybe I would meet someone along the way.


It feels like an extreme measure but my life is going nowhere at the minute.


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## SparklingWater (Jan 16, 2013)

I'm 31. Considering going to Korea next year. Just getting paperwork together and making sure everything is in order here. I'm not committed yet as I'm also considering moving to a cheaper state far from family. Getting my TEFL and going to send out apps so I have options in case I decide to. Was also looking at peace corps, but if I do move abroad it would likely be to teach English.

I think it's a nice option if you just want a change of pace, redefine yourself, save money, learn about another culture that you're interested in. Is there any place you're particularly interested in going?

Also, have you tried career counseling or a coach? Or having someone help you run mock interviews until you gain more confidence?


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## etomaria (Dec 12, 2018)

A job, or even a career, is not what will fulfill you, in 99% of the cases, and even in the 1%, not completely. You need money to pay rent, etc. but it won’t lead to happiness. It sounds like you’re putting too much pressure on yourself to receive social validation based on an “appropriate” or “respectful” career choice, yet you admit to not be passionate about those paths you’ve tried. I’ve gone through so much school, and realized after that I am much happier doing mundane, simple work (it needs to get done anyway), and to enjoy my life as much as possible otherwise. Moving away won’t solve things for you.


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## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

If you believe that moving abroad will help you or do you some good I say go for it. You never know what would be in store for you with this change.

If you do go for this I suggest you do your "homework" by researching this moving abroad. Also make sure you feel ready and eager to make this happen for yourself. The last thing you want is to up and go to another place without being prepared emotionally, mentally,spiritually {if you are spiritual} and financially. This require planning. There is also the possibility that going abroad may not help you. You have to look at both sides. But even so look at the bright side. If you stay optimistic and believe this will do you some good then like I said go for it

_ Sent by Fun Spirit formally Black As Day using Tapatalk_


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## evolutionpsychology (Dec 27, 2018)

I am 38 years old and have had many different jobs in my life. Cookery, Software, Locksmith. I'm married right now. I want to live in a village, in the countryside. It is very important to know what kind of life you want to live and who you want to live with.


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## Cool Ice Dude55 (Jan 7, 2014)

If that's what you feel is best then do it.

You will always have to come home though. Maybe.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

I had a hard time finding something after university too. Then at a institute for aplite economics, they have been like "wow you studies nuclear physics you must be a genius, here take this job". True story. I mean keep trying, there are a lot easy jobs that need some mathematics.


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## Reverie101 (Jan 5, 2018)

The Sorrow said:


> I had a hard time finding something after university too. Then at a institute for aplite economics, they have been like "wow you studies nuclear physics you must be a genius, here take this job". True story. I mean keep trying, there are a lot easy jobs that need some mathematics.


 lol

I'm glad u got the job though


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## 22litre (Jan 13, 2019)

The Sorrow said:


> I had a hard time finding something after university too. Then at a institute for aplite economics, they have been like "wow you studies nuclear physics you must be a genius, here take this job". True story. I mean keep trying, there are a lot easy jobs that need some mathematics.


That's what I studied; bachelors in physics then masters in nuclear physics. Someone quit my bachelors, did an apprenticeship and is now a senior software developer. Meanwhile im currently unemployed :crying:


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## cybernaut (Jul 30, 2010)

Damn. Physics was also something I've been reflecting upon as something I "should have" majored in. I was so good at it back in high school. But yes, I've also come to realization that securing a decent entry level job [immediately] after graduation is only possible if you have special social connections (eg: internships, knowing higher up people, family, etc) or have done many useful 'side projects' outside of their degree coursework. I have two degrees, one of them being tech related (Cybersecurity). Considering my field, I'm seriously considering the Air Force if no luck by this summer.


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## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

NiTech said:


> Damn. Physics was also something I've been reflecting upon as something I "should have" majored in. I was so good at it back in high school. But yes, I've also come to realization that securing a decent entry level job [immediately] after graduation is only possible if you have special social connections (eg: internships, knowing higher up people, family, etc) or have done many useful 'side projects' outside of your degree coursework. I have two degrees, one of them being tech related (Cybersecurity). Considering my field, I'm seriously considering the Air Force if no luck by this summer.


Yipe! I might be in this boat here as well. Internship is coming up, though, the school promises no surefire guarantees on obtaining internships / job security after graduation, and apparently, you have to do all of the work yourself i.e write your own resumes, and actually call the companies as opposed to the school pre-arranging something for you. I hope to be certified with the Security+ sometime later this month (I let time slip by / goofed off / procrastinated; I should've gotten it last year).

And Idk... Perhaps if you were to blend it with making an app available in the app store or contributing to github projects, it would increase your chances. Dunno of any side projects relating to Cybersecurity or where to start on that. And I guess taking the CySa+ or that CASP+ certification doesn't help much either, I'm assuming.

Hopefully you won't have to join the Air Force (I'm pretty apprehensive about that myself) or anything. I had an idea about trying the freelancing / digital-nomad approach, but, not really sure where to start (not really exceptional at coding to the point of making actual applications that work as well as the amount of self-marketing that you'd have to do). Coding bootcamps are expensive, and not really sure if I can keep up with it all. If you're ok with risk and have some amount of money saved up, perhaps one could look into daytrading / swing trading stocks (I haven't looked into the crypto in a while here, but I don't think it's doing very well). Initially, my approach was to transition to daytrading full-time, but apparently, that didn't work (bombarded with school + work); at least not yet, but one day it will. But aside from that, good luck with the job hunting.


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## cybernaut (Jul 30, 2010)

GeomTech said:


> Yipe! I might in this boat here as well. Internship is coming up, though, the school promises no surefire guarantees on obtaining internships / job security after graduation, and apparently, you have to do all of the work yourself i.e write your own resumes, and actually call the companies as opposed to the school pre-arranging something for you. I hope to be certified with the Security+ sometime later this month (I let time slip by / goofed off / procrastinated; I should've gotten it last year).
> 
> And Idk... Perhaps if you were to blend it with making an app available in the app store or contributing to github projects, it would increase your chances. Dunno of any side projects relating to Cybersecurity or where to start on that. And I guess taking the CySa+ or that CASP+ certification doesn't help much either, I'm assuming.
> 
> Hopefully you won't have to join the Air Force (I'm pretty apprehensive about that myself) or anything. I had an idea about trying the freelancing / digital-nomad approach, but, not really sure where to start (not really exceptional at coding to the point of making actual applications that work as well as the amount of self-marketing that you'd have to do). Coding bootcamps are expensive, and not really sure if I can keep up with it all. If you're ok with risk and have some amount of money saved up, perhaps one could look into daytrading / swing trading stocks (I haven't looked into the crypto in a while here, but I don't think it's doing very well). Initially, my approach was to transition to daytrading full-time, but apparently, that didn't work (bombarded with school + work); at least not yet, but one day it will. But aside from that, good luck with the job hunting.


Attending a university program that pre-arrange internships definitely seems to be good way to increase ones chances for job security after graduation- especially for highly introverted people. I slightly envy such schools because my program pretty much left us in the cold with regards to getting internships. I applied to dozens of internships, had a few interviews, but never heard back. I'm also rather clueless about finding cyber related projects on Github. But, I am currently researching ways to make a virtual home lab just to experiment with security tools, Linux, Active Directory, etc

I've also been chatting with many IT security/cybersecurity/InfoSec employees via Reddit who mentioned that people with computer network skills/knowledge [eg: Network administrators]also have an easier time transitioning into security jobs as well. A good coding background seems to be a good skill for those who want cyber jobs like Penetration Testing and Ethical Hacking. Yet, there are also many job positions that don't completely care for coding such as Risk Management; InfoSec/Cybersecurity Analysts; Security Engineer; Information Assurance; etc. I'm not much of a heavy programmer myself either.

I'm also taking the the Security+ certification this month and have been studying for quite some time. I was supposed to take it this Thursday but rescheduled for the 28th. If you need any input on sources, feel free to ask. I also plan to pick up several networking certifications along the way as well [CCNA, Network+, etc]. And thanks for the luck. I definitely hope to exhaust all options before the Air Force stuff as well.


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## Tomorrowisalongtime (Jan 15, 2019)

I'm in such a bad situation that I have only 3 possible solutions.

1) after my parents die, live with my sister (great woman but this wouldn't help me)
2) become homeless (hard with a medical condition that requires check ups)
3) commit suicide

Out of those 3 possibilities, only the last 2 are real options in my mind.


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## jtd1974 (Jan 13, 2015)

I don't know, this "move abroad and make a new start" thing seems unrealistic to me.

Wherever you go, you will take your problems with you.

I'm from London. I ended up moving here to Australia. I had this idea that everything would be great and I'd leave my struggles with SA behind. 

The reality was that my problems were still there, and now I also had to contend with being in a new country, among people with a different culture and with whom I felt I had nothing in common.

It's taken years for me to begin to feel more at home here. But I still feel like an outsider at times.

Sorry if all this comes across as overly pessimistic. Perhaps you don't have these unrealistic expectations like I did. But I'd advise careful thought anyway.


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## Cool Ice Dude55 (Jan 7, 2014)

jtd1974 said:


> I don't know, this "move abroad and make a new start" thing seems unrealistic to me.
> 
> Wherever you go, you will take your problems with you.
> 
> ...


thats interesting that you say that to me. I was about to move to OZ but i knew my social anxiety would get in the way. The idea of being mentally unwell on the other side of the world just freaks me out. There's no such thing as running away from your problems...infact "running away" makes it worse.Glad that you overcome it and are still living it up in Oz <3


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## jtd1974 (Jan 13, 2015)

Cool Ice Dude55 said:


> thats interesting that you say that to me. I was about to move to OZ but i knew my social anxiety would get in the way. The idea of being mentally unwell on the other side of the world just freaks me out. There's no such thing as running away from your problems...infact "running away" makes it worse.Glad that you overcome it and are still living it up in Oz <3


Thanks mate, I appreciate that. Not sure about the "living it up" bit though, or even for that matter the "overcoming it" lol.

I dunno, I guess I'm doing alright. I not long ago lost my job, but am about to start a new one. The place feels more like home now.

I think part of where I went wrong was in thinking "they speak the same language, it'll be easy, I'll just slot in". The cultural difference is huge. At first I didn't know how to take people here, and obviously having SA didn't help.

The social cues are different here; people are friendly on the surface but I found it to be insincere much of the time, and I struggled to break through that and make real connections.

As for overcoming it, well it's taken lots of therapy (ongoing) and lots of medication (also ongoing lol). I guess I've had to go through the same stuff here as I would've if I'd stayed in the UK.

But I'm wary of coming across as overly pessimistic here; it is a trait of mine. I wouldn't want to think I'd put you off giving it a go. You just have to be sure of why you're going, and realistic in your expectations. That's where I went wrong.


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## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

A rolling Stone gathers no moss.


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