# Girls



## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

Why don't any girls like me? What am I doing wrong? What do I need to change? What do I not know about them?

:sigh


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

Girls like chocolate.


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## shadowmask (Jun 22, 2009)

Get in shape
Gain self-confidence
Develop a good sense of humor

That's all you need. Oh, and money helps, too.


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

somethinginthewind said:


> Girls like cuddles. And being told they're beautiful. And not being left waiting.


Yes, I agree. I hate waiting for a guy.

I like when a guy smells good and is warm. :yes


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

I'm drinking hot chocolate right now. And I will cuddle anytime, but never have.

Waiting for what? For him to reply to an e-mail/phone call? Waiting for him on a date? Waiting for him to show that he likes you?


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## Game 7 (Dec 23, 2009)

If you want a girl to like you, be sweet and thoughtful...90% of the time. You can't be like that all the time or they stop appreciating it...


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

All of those. What really makes me mad is when a guy says he'll be somewhere at a certain time but isn't and doesn't bother to call to let me know. So I wait, and don't want to start doing something in case he comes by soon. It's also aggravating when a guy says where you're going/what you're doing on a date, then goes somewhere else. This guy told me we were going to Starbucks. Then in the car he asked where I'd like to go out to eat, and mentioned we would also be going to his house to watch a scary movie. So I guess the bottom line is that I'd like to be kept informed.


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## 718 (Dec 19, 2008)

It's hard to say because you haven't really told us what your personality is like.

But just taking a guess....you're probably boring/awkward/anxious/not confident....as a result of SA. Posess any of these traits and girls will immediately run in the opposite direction. So work on them...how? I don't know.


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## etka (Jul 17, 2009)

laura024 said:


> Yes, I agree. I hate waiting for a guy.
> 
> I like when a guy smells good and is warm. :yes





Sunnie said:


> Oh, yeah!


Well I'm in luck, I'm not a dead rotting corpse. :boogie

BRING ON THE LADIES!!!


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## emptybottle2 (Jan 18, 2009)

Are you approaching girls? How do you know they don't like you?


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## VIncymon (Apr 16, 2009)

718 said:


> It's hard to say because you haven't really told us what your personality is like.
> 
> But just taking a guess....you're probably boring/awkward/anxious/not confident....as a result of SA. Posess any of these traits and girls will immediately run in the opposite direction. So work on them...how? I don't know.


:mum:clap:clap:clap:clap:clap:clap

You've won the thread man. In that simple post you have summarised the basic* paradoxial problem* of the majority of S.A.er's on here.

It is a paradox, because, if you are confident, interesting, non anxious and not socially awkward ... then you would*n't* have Social Anxiety, and wouldn't have started this thread in the first place.


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## FBH (Dec 3, 2009)

VIncymon said:


> if you are confident, interesting, non anxious and not socially awkward ... then you wouldn't have Social Anxiety


I don't think this is always true, just very common. I can hold a conversation surprisingly well, and it seems like people find me interesting enough, but I'm still socially anxious. I think low self-confidence and low self-efficacy are the two traits most common in people with SA. I find that people often find themselves uninteresting, even when they aren't. It seems common that some people believe that it's their boring-ness that holds them back, when in reality, it's their lack of confidence and doubts about their potential.

I believe that breaking the paradox takes realizing that you're only stuck in it because you make yourself stuck in it. It really is all in your head. Everybody doesn't hate you. There are people out there who will find you attractive. I can guarantee you that, and I think it's just about convincing yourself to go meet them.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

emptybottle2 said:


> Are you approaching girls? How do you know they don't like you?


It isn't easy to randomly approach girls. But, it's not like there have been any girls that I've ever had to turn away.

I think I am kind of interesting. At least for a while. I'm more interesting than I have been in the past. Yet I can't live vicariously through myself yet.

Self-esteem isn't a problem currently, and self-efficacy is moderate. I don't know what I am doing, but I envision positive outcomes.


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## paradox002 (Oct 13, 2009)

Google it, ask the pros.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Well, what is it you think you may be doing wrong? What are some things you think you can be doing to improve your chances?


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

So, if I show no interest, I'm not desperate. If I show any interest, I'm desperate. I won't win either way.



bwidger85 said:


> Well, what is it you think you may be doing wrong?


Having hobbies that I do by myself, spending too much time alone and not meeting other people, and not having great conversation skills.



bwidger85 said:


> What are some things you think you can be doing to improve your chances?


That is for other people to answer. I have tried and failed.

Age 16, I got a car, Age 18, I got in shape, Age 23, I graduated college, Age 24, I got a good job, Age 27, I bought I house. Besides making a million dollars, going into pre-med, or moving someplace where there are more single girls, what else is left?


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Classified said:


> So, if I show no interest, I'm not desperate. If I show any interest, I'm desperate.


It's not that complicated. Just think about what would annoy you about someone or make you feel that someone is desperate and don't do the same to women. There is no difference between what you would find annoying and what women find annoying or desperate. Don't pay attention to people telling you not to show interest because that's BS. Just don't be excessive. Use your own judgement on that.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

I've never experienced a clingy or desperate woman. I don't think that is a bad thing if she is really into you and wants to be around you a lot. I'm having a hard time imagining how a girlfriend could be too clingy/desperate.


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## anomalous (Jun 12, 2004)

Why is confidence so damn important?

Winning answer will avoid cliches and account for the fact that, despite what most girls will say, very _over_confident guys usually have few problems attracting women while a guy who's realistic and modest about his shortcomings is practically doomed.


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

Breakfast0fChampions said:


> How about not liking you for you - liking you because you're a male and you pay attention to her? How about calling you twenty times a day? How about not allowing you a single day to yourself?
> 
> What I get from you is you're not looking to take anyone's advice, you're just looking to wallow in self-pity and be contrary. That's the vibe I've gotten from your last few responses to this thread. :|


I don't see it that way at all. Some guys just don't have the ability to attract women. I see letters to advise columns on this subject often. Guys try everything and nothing works. I knew a guy from another website who got a mail order asian bride.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

Breakfast0fChampions said:


> How about not liking you for you - liking you because you're a male and you pay attention to her? How about calling you twenty times a day? How about not allowing you a single day to yourself?
> 
> What I get from you is you're not looking to take anyone's advice, you're just looking to wallow in self-pity and be contrary. That's the vibe I've gotten from your last few responses to this thread. :|


I am trying to figure out what is wrong with my approach. I have tried some things that I thought were the problem, yet were not.

I have a hard time believing that I will go from a life where I haven't received a phone call from a girl in years to one where I have to worry about getting too many. I've lived 10,968 days by myself, I can not comprehend having this problem (maybe it would happen, but I have no experience with it, so I don't know).


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Just because women haven't up and called you doesn’t mean you can't take responsibility yourself and try yourself to make a connection. Sometimes it's not good to be passive.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

anomalous said:


> Why is confidence so damn important?
> 
> Winning answer will avoid cliches and account for the fact that, despite what most girls will say, very _over_confident guys usually have few problems attracting women while a guy who's realistic and modest about his shortcomings is practically doomed.


I think a lot of it just has to do with the fact that if your confident in yourself your going to make things happen. Confident guys usually get the girls because they are typically more active in their pursuits (getting the girl) and don't second-guess their abilities all the time. If you think your not capable of getting a girlfriend the guy who does think he is capable is more likely to approach first and more often and get the girl while you are still trying to fix yourself. Still, this is NOT to say women don't like shy men. It is simply to say that you need to believe in yourself and make things happen for yourself and it will likely come much easier that way. Both men and women like people who respect and believe in themselves, so it goes for both sexes and not just women.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

bwidger85 said:


> Just because women haven't up and called you doesn't mean you can't take responsibility yourself and try yourself to make a connection. Sometimes it's not good to be passive.


While this is probably the correct answer, it isn't the easiest thing. Not exactly because of confidence issues, but a lack of knowledge on how to approach single women as a single male without having them think you are only interested in sex. And a lack of information on if she is single, what does she like/dislike, what is her personality like... And anything I seem to come up with in my head violates the "Don't be desperate" rule.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Classified said:


> While this is probably the correct answer, it isn't the easiest thing. Not exactly because of confidence issues, but a lack of knowledge on how to approach single women as a single male without having them think you are only interested in sex. And a lack of information on if she is single, what does she like/dislike, what is her personality like... And anything I seem to come up with in my head violates the "Don't be desperate" rule.


You have to take that chance. You need to rely on the fact that once you two get to know each other better she won't see that your after sex. If your referring to not knowing a girl and conveying that, one suggestion would be to just get to know her, ask her questions and not delve into topics of sexual nature unless you feel she knows that is not your intent. It truly is as simple as that. Just talk to her like you would anyone else and you won't come off as a guy looking for sex.

You need to get it out of your head that by asking questions you seem desperate. It is simple a conversation. Just because you talk to a women does not mean your even interested in anything romantic at all. What is it you want to genuinely know about her? Ask her questions you honestly want to know. If you want to know if she is single then ask her. I don't understand why you think that is desperate? You have every right to get to know the women around you.

One thing I would like to point out is that your confusion is normal because you don't have enough experience right now. I was and still am confused about certain things but I've come to understand other things through experience. It is good you ask questions and are willing to learn.


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## anomalous (Jun 12, 2004)

bwidger85 said:


> I think a lot of it just has to do with the fact that if your confident in yourself your going to make things happen. Confident guys usually get the girls because they are typically more active in their pursuits (getting the girl) and don't second-guess their abilities all the time. If you think your not capable of getting a girlfriend the guy who does think he is capable is more likely to approach first and more often and get the girl while you are still trying to fix yourself. Still, this is NOT to say women don't like shy men. It is simply to say that you need to believe in yourself and make things happen for yourself and it will likely come much easier that way. Both men and women like people who respect and believe in themselves, so it goes for both sexes and not just women.


I'm trying to isolate my question to a very particular issue, but I didn't articulate it very well. A lot of what you said is true, but it's also kind of cliche and obvious.

Let me try again: I understand that a guy with traits inherently desirable or beneficial to a woman (e.g., tall, outgoing, etc.) is more likely to be confident based on life experience and positive reinforcement. Also, he's more likely to pursue girls aggressively, as you mentioned. Thus, I'd expect a correlation between confidence and ability to get girls. What I don't get is the apparent casual relationship between confidence and attractiveness. Why is confidence _in and of itself_ so great? Why is it that two guys whose appearance, intelligence, background, and even wit are very similar can be viewed as so different by (many) women simply because one is significantly more confident than the other?

I ask because confidence is not very important to me in a girl, so I'm attempting to understand the mindset that leads to valuing it so much. Confidence has always struck me, personally, as such a trivial idea when considering everything that a person is.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Classified said:


> So, if I show no interest, I'm not desperate. If I show any interest, I'm desperate. I won't win either way.
> 
> Having hobbies that I do by myself, spending too much time alone and not meeting other people, and not having great conversation skills.
> 
> ...


Accept that anywhere is a good place to meet people. It may be harder in some places over others but it isn't out of the realm of possibly. Some people prefer to approach at popular meeting places like bars or dating sites but it can happen anywhere if you say screw what people think for just one second and do it anyways. However, you also have to consider that women will be more open in certain places over others, so take that into consideration as well. Make a list?

As far as your hobbies, alone time and lack of confidence in conversation skills, these things can be overcome in short periods. You already know what you shouldn't be doing so permit yourself to meet people and go out. As far as building up confidence in conversation, you already know the basics... all you have to do is be friendly.

If you'd like to get a hold of me and talk about this more in detail feel free to send me a PM sometime


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

anomalous said:


> I'm trying to isolate my question to a very particular issue, but I didn't articulate it very well. A lot of what you said is true, but it's also kind of cliche and obvious.
> 
> Let me try again: I understand that a guy with traits inherently desirable or beneficial to a woman (e.g., tall, outgoing, etc.) is more likely to be confident based on life experience and positive reinforcement. Also, he's more likely to pursue girls aggressively, as you mentioned. Thus, I'd expect a correlation between confidence and ability to get girls. What I don't get is the apparent casual relationship between confidence and attractiveness. Why is confidence _in and of itself_ so great? Why is it that two guys whose appearance, intelligence, background, and even wit are very similar can be viewed as so different by (many) women simply because one is significantly more confident than the other?
> 
> I ask because confidence is not very important to me in a girl, so I'm attempting to understand the mindset that leads to valuing it so much. Confidence has always struck me, personally, as such a trivial idea when considering everything that a person is.


If you have a hard time having confidence in yourself it can be apparent through many different ways (i.e., body language, voice tone, etc). I don't know how else to say it without sound harsh but, if you don't respect or think highly of yourself do you think it makes it any easier for others to? People don't want to continuously care for another indivisual emotionally as it seems like too much to handle. People want others to be confident in themselves so that they can also enjoy themselves without feeling pressured to be overly sensitive or emotionally receptive.

Ugh, confidence is like such a vague thing to try to explain.......... many different personalities are confident and not just one "alpha" quality as some would describe.


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## ryobi (Jan 13, 2009)

One word.

Ferrari.

Just kidding...


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

Breakfast0fChampions said:


> 1) I don't think I ever mentioned having to contend with too many women at once...
> 
> 2) Why do you think your life will either be being completely alone and having no attention from women *or* having too many women interested in you at one time? That's black-and-white, SA-type thinking, and not helping you at all.


I was talking about phonecalls. You said that she would call 20 times a day, and I can't understand why she would do that, or what it would be like.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

20 times a day? Yeah, that may be in the clingy category...:yes


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

joinmartin said:


> I mean, this whole "my approach is wrong" thing is in danger of becoming a negative fundamental belief which drowns out in your thinking the many things you may be doing right in trying to meet and talk to girls. So, how about starting from the premise that you're doing a lot right but you want to improve things and take things forward? Much better starting block.


I think that is a good idea and great advise


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## etka (Jul 17, 2009)

bwidger85 said:


> 20 times a day? Yeah, that may be in the clingy category...:yes


 Or as I like to say bat guano insane.


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## emptybottle2 (Jan 18, 2009)

Have you considered joining a hobby club or taking a class? Taking a cooking class or joining a running/hiking/cycling club or book club or whatever seems like a much less intimidating way to meet women than the bar scene. You don't have to show romantic interest right away, and even if no dates come of it, it can at least help you practice talking to women and maybe make some female friends who share your interests.


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## BreakingtheGirl (Nov 14, 2009)

Classified said:


> Why don't any girls like me? What am I doing wrong? What do I need to change? What do I not know about them?
> 
> :sigh


Girls are a complex and emotional sort.


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## izzy (Dec 18, 2009)

irishK said:


> Girls are a complex and emotional sort.


So are guys.


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## Lincolnradiocat (Dec 10, 2005)

FBH said:


> I believe that breaking the paradox takes realizing that you're only stuck in it because you make yourself stuck in it. It really is all in your head. Everybody doesn't hate you. There are people out there who will find you attractive. I can guarantee you that, and I think it's just about convincing yourself to go meet them.


You are just too frekin smart for your age. I wish I believed that at 19.


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## InThe519 (Sep 21, 2009)

Here's how it rolls:

- Confidence

Women love confidence because it shows you are in control of yourself and control means security and safety with you.

- Hygiene

The fact you take personal care of yourself shows women you can take personal care of them.

- Sense of Humor

Make a woman laugh and laugh a lot, you are in. Women love to have someone that can just take all their stresses away and or are creative enough to be skillfully funny.

- Job/School

Be doing something. Even if you are in a transitory phase, most women will forgive a BRIEF transition phase. Just don't be a leech or a bum long term or you are going back to Palmala. 

- Hobbies/Sexy Skills

Know how to cook? Play guitar? those are big time winners. Food and music are two of womens favorite things and both can trigger VERY intense reactions. 

- Personal Attributes

Listen don't fix. Be punctual. Don't swear a lot. Never answer trap questions ("Does this make me look fat") - Yet flip it to a compliment rather than answer the "You are ****ed either way" questions. 

It's 6am, I hope some of that made sense


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Just make someone feel good and they should love you. I don't think you need all the above things to have a successful relationship with a woman you like, and for ladies, the same thing goes with men.

Gitty-gitty goo!


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

emptybottle2 said:


> Have you considered joining a hobby club or taking a class? Taking a cooking class or joining a running/hiking/cycling club or book club or whatever seems like a much less intimidating way to meet women than the bar scene. You don't have to show romantic interest right away, and even if no dates come of it, it can at least help you practice talking to women and maybe make some female friends who share your interests.


A cooking, college, or photography class would be a good idea. But, it takes a lot of time and schedule structure that I don't really have. I also need to be in town week after week. Time availability is something I do need to work on.


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## mrbojangles (Oct 8, 2009)

girls dont know what the hell they like.


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## JFmtl (Dec 23, 2008)

mrbojangles said:


> girls dont know what the hell they like.


It's not that hard, they want very confidant man that are not arrogant ever.
They want strong, "I get what I want" type of person that don't take **** from anyone, but you better obey when they tell you to something.
They want serious guys, with a big sense of humour. 
They want "bad boyish" guys that are very respectful, that can behave and act nice, that wont cheat or look a other women, that have a successful career and that wont bring any trouble 
Also, open communication is very important; you better never be honest when they ask you if they are fat, what does that other pretty girl looks like, and you better be able to "read" those barely noticeable subtitle non-language stuff.

:duck:duck:duck:duck:duck:duck:duck:duck

Ok I better stop now


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

mmmmmm generalizations.


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## rickthegreat (Dec 22, 2008)

mrbojangles said:


> girls dont know what the hell they like.


rofl.


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## Oneiros (Oct 18, 2009)

girls are awesome.


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## sda0 (Oct 16, 2009)

InThe519 said:


> Here's how it rolls:
> 
> - Confidence
> 
> ...


I would like to subscribe to your newsletter, sir. :clap


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## mrbojangles (Oct 8, 2009)

rickthegreat said:


> rofl.


thanks, im here all week


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

Sunnie said:


> But wouldn't you feel awkward and uncomfortable knowing you can't cook/ take pictures, etc, well? this always holds me back.


The trick is to know just enough of the basics to know what is going on, yet still be able to be taught the more advanced things by others.


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## jane (Jan 30, 2006)

Classified said:


> Why don't any girls like me? What am I doing wrong? What do I need to change? What do I not know about them?
> 
> :sigh


I think a lot of us feel this way: What am I doing wrong, what's wrong with me? 
But I think the biggest thing that is wrong is social anxiety. Normal people have a lot of friends and acquaintances, are always meeting new people, going to parties, are always out and about, talking to strangers, and taking risks. Normal people probably know and encounter 10 times the number of people we do, so they have a greater chance of meeting someone.


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

I consider myself normal.


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## njodis (Nov 8, 2006)

I hear they just wanna have fu-un.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

:lol When the workin' day is done, oh gir-r-r-r-ls. :lol

How we carry ourselves is a huge deal maker. If we give off the inferior vibes, guys, that's not so attractive.


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## JFmtl (Dec 23, 2008)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> mmmmmm generalizations.


From now on, I shall be known as El excelente Général Generalizations!


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## Oneiros (Oct 18, 2009)

girls are crazy :bash


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Oneiros said:


> girls are awesome.





Oneiros said:


> girls are crazy :bash


:sus


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## izzy (Dec 18, 2009)

mrbojangles said:


> girls dont know what the hell they like.


I don't? Dur hurr hurrrrrrr.


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## TRENNER (Sep 21, 2009)

Classified said:


> Why don't any girls like me? What am I doing wrong? What do I need to change?....
> 
> :sigh


These are hard questions to answer without seeing you in action. A friend or a therapist would be best to help you here. I'd also buy the old classic _How to Win Friends and Influence People_ by Dale Carnegie. His advice works for both genders. A major suggestion from there--ask questions and get people to talk about _their_ interests.

I'd additionally like to mention that women typically like men who radiate positive energy---something difficult for us SA guys.


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## TheJoker (Dec 24, 2009)

We're screwed (in the bad way...)


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## jimity (Jan 12, 2011)

Classified said:


> Why don't any girls like me? What am I doing wrong? What do I need to change? What do I not know about them?
> 
> :sigh


Since I know very little about you I might assume...

you might give off bad body odor or have bad breath, you might not have physical looks that gets their attention when they see you or they simply might find you replusive looking. You might have a dopey appearance and character or in some way come across mentally and neurologically impaired or deficient or have a short term memory deficit or you behave like you are lost . You might dress like a bum or be unkempt. You might have behaviours that make you come off weird or sad to them. You might be too nice for your own good perhaps trying to please them (not sexually wise) too much or putting up with crap from other guys. You might bore them to death or have interests which don't interest them or have poor conversational skills or lack the social finesse or the nerve to move things up to the next level which might be a turn off. You might be one of those guys who believes their opinions are right and feel they need to argue them across and never likes to consider others which makes you an annoying *******. There are so many things about you that could be so very wrong or you may be giving off a highly negative message about yourself. This might be the result of negative thoughts like "I'm a pathetic loser with little life and experience, and therefore I don't like myself all that much which means you probably won't like me either". These thoughts can have very powerful influences on your behaviour and give off negative vibes and can make women be repulsed by the negative attitude.

So going off these assumptions that I've filled in the void created from the questions, here's some ideas. Change into fashionable clothes since many women judge clothes, change the loser attitude if you have one by hiding it when you are around them and don't beat yourself down, project confidence. People tend to judge others at face value, so what they see is what they tend to believe. If you talk to them first this will show confidence. If you can't you will need to, in three words, grow a pair. Make a good first impression because they tend to last and you'll be tagged as a potentially shagable guy. People don't easily change their opinion about people they know, so if you give a bad first impression it can easily ruin your chances and then you'll have to work even harder to change their mind about you. Just think how people always know you as a guy who does this or that. People might know you as someone who works out everyday. So even if you quit working out and start sitting on your *** eating hamburgurs and smoking dope and drinking beer, people will still think you work out... until the belly starts growing and even then they'll still probably assume you still work out... see what I'm getting at. Excessive nervousness should be controlled otherwise this can make many women insecure and if you are relatively calm this can show to them you are confident and relaxed with who you are even if your not. A little shyness is good as it shows you are genuine in your approach. Just be yourself, and judging from your opening thread, when I say just be yourself I mean you should be someone entirely different. When you've bagged her and she's your's, you can begin revealing your old regular self.... whatever that may be. People want what they can't get so you might need to tease them a bit. Throw in a few compliments about the way she looks (her clothes, hair or jewelery NOT her body) Don't reveal too much about yourself. Only the attention starved will reveal all about themselves on a first date. Leave a sense of mystery about yourself. Don't be a clown who tries to be funny all the time. Being a clown is not a good sense of humor but a sense of humor is a very good trait, a person who picks his spots carefully and doesn't milk them till they run empty. You are doing great if you can keep a woman laughing. Go in with a goal in your mind, ie, you are after a date or to get laid. This helps with relating to women better as a man than just an awkward klutz who doesn't really know what he is actually doing when he goes over. Don't let your blue balls make you act desperate, just be cool and a bit aloof because people tend to want what they think they can't have. Showing you are doing alright for yourself financial wise tends to help a little. Being able to cook and are willing to help around with chores instead of being a lazy *** who sits on the couch watching tv shows like 101 ways to leave a game show will also help. Be kind and curteous is always good. Listen to them when they talk and be empathetic (even if you are a narcissist or sociopath underneath). Don't force your opinions but give little bits of advice if they start yapping on about something going on in their life that they're unsure about what to do.

If no girls like you then you need to put yourself out there more, and if still no girl likes you, you might need to consider being a toy boy and move on to an older age group or other nationalities. There are women out there who will want you to win their hearts but won't give it up so easily. You need to sell yourself to them. The best way is by making them see just exactly how their lives will be better with you involved in it. Yes, girls want love, they want sex, they want someone by their side. If you are willing to play rather than sit on the sidelines like so very many guys, then your chances have just increased. And just know that there are so many men who have opted to sit on the sidelines which means more women for you. Don't forget that you have the right to reject a woman even if you approach and decide you don't like her.


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