# Handwriting obsession



## Lumiere (Jun 13, 2009)

Does anyone else here obsess over their handwriting?

If I write a letter or a birthday/Christmas card to someone or a postcard, I have to write everything (including the name/address on the envelope) out in pencil first, to make sure I don't mess it up and the writing doesn't look like it was written by a serial killer. I have to use a ruler on envelopes, too; so that it's not uneven and messy.
Then, I go over it in pen, and once the ink has dried I erase the pencil lines; just in case they see the pencil and think I'm a simpleton (which I clearly am).
It's so time-consuming, but I just don't trust myself to write it well-enough without these "safety measures".

I wonder if this is an extension of SA.


----------



## TorLin (Nov 14, 2006)

not really

i hate my handwriting, its always mixed with print and cursive nowadays.


----------



## Jayseph (Dec 21, 2008)

I don't take those measures to perfect it but I do worry about it. I used to get embarrassed even writing in class where people could see my pad.


----------



## Lumiere (Jun 13, 2009)

^ It can be so draining, can't it? Yet another cause for anxiety.

The reason I thought it may be an extension of SA is because it bares all the hallmarks of my more recognisable symptoms.
It's an irrational fear that, if I misspell or write sloppily, I'll be judged negatively. A lack of confidence in myself to be able to do what others (without SA) do without thinking twice. Perfectionism, etc.

And, after all, isn't writing to someone just another form of social activity?

The other thing which troubles me (as in everyday conversation) is that I'll say/write the "wrong" thing and come across as an idiot; so in that respect aswell, writing it out in pencil first is safer.

I don't know if it's connected (probably), but I used to be very careful and quite proud of my handwriting when I was a kid/teenager; but then, for reasons I'm not entirely sure of, my handwriting dramatically declined around the age of 13/14. So much so that my teachers began commenting on it -- my French teacher even broke away from a group of well-wishers on her leaving day and came over to tell me to improve my handwriting and I would do well in the exam (I didn't in the end, I got a D).
My handwriting eventually got better -- it was barely legible at one point -- but ever since that time I've had this irrationally self-conscious attitude to whatever I write.

It's not a problem, as I don't write much anyway, I just wondered if anyone else had the same.


----------



## Silence (Jul 4, 2009)

Yes I always worry about what my handwriting looks like on a card. What I do is write in pencil first, make sure everything is to my liking, and then go over it with a pen. But I haven't done that in a while, since most of the things I write now are sent via e-mail. Sometimes even when I do signatures at a store for verification, I go slow to make sure it looks neat. lol.


----------



## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

I used to be way more obsessive about my writing, even rewriting notes I took in class because they were messy. I don't really care anymore.


----------



## guitargirl (Aug 31, 2009)

for schoolwork, I constantly erase letters even if they're legible. I think irrationally "oh no, that e just went below the line!!!" It's petty, but I just can't help myself.


----------



## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Yes, I do - it has to be neat.
There have been times where my handwriting has been mistaken for a female's!


----------



## Aurora (Feb 27, 2009)

I think I have the ugliest handwriting on the planet. People have even commented on how bad it is.
Those people who read into people handwriting would get the shock of a lifetime reading mine.:um


----------



## deeds14 (Jul 9, 2009)

Sounds more like a symptom of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder than SA...


----------



## Cataclysm Ballet (Jul 11, 2009)

I've been told my handwriting looks like a computer did it (a bit of an exaggeration) but I try to make all of my letters the same height and try to give them a uniform look.

It never ceases to amaze me how many little things like this we all seem to have in common.


----------



## scooby (Jun 24, 2009)

I don't really obsess over normal handwriting, its doing my signature that I worry about.


----------



## DuncanThaw (Jun 19, 2009)

In my younger years, I went through great pains to develop an elegant handwriting of my own -- relatively small lettering (bigger lettering makes me nervous, as does wide-ruled paper) with somewhat swooping (but still rather subdued) flourishes. Having handwriting that looks both neat and distinctive is important to me, and I often will rewrite even the most insignificant notes (even ones just for myself) if they seem untidy.

It really bothers me when I have to sign for a package, or for debit card verification at a store: I can't seem to angle my hand correctly when it feels like someone is watching and waiting. It looks awful, and I can't fix it.

I am also left-handed, so I'm sometimes a bit self-conscious about that when writing (or eating, or doing anything with my hands) in public or in front of others generally -- it really doesn't happen too often and it doesn't bother me really, but sometimes someone will exclaim, "Hey, you're left-handed!", and I'm not sure if this is good or bad, or just seems somewhat odd to them.



Cataclysm Ballet said:


> It never ceases to amaze me how many little things like this we all seem to have in common.


Indeed! :yes I find this comforting, and a wee bit eerie.


----------



## Toad Licker (Nov 2, 2007)

Nope, everyone knows I have bad handwriting so I never worry about it lol.


----------



## Catching Fire (Apr 23, 2009)

I've always had aweful handwriting and its never bothered me lol.


----------



## Aurora (Feb 27, 2009)

Mine is real bad, but my dad has an obsession with his. I remember he would even write my assignments in primary school? I think my dad has ocd, he goes a bit over the top with his perfectionism. His handwriting is one of the many perfect things he does. I even remember he would write the lil notes on 'santas presents', you could always tell dad was santa by his handwriting! lol.


----------



## ShyViolet (Nov 11, 2003)

I wasted a lot of paper in my school days because I would rip it up if one letter looked a little off.


----------



## nothing to fear (Mar 23, 2005)

millenniumman75 said:


> Yes, I do - it has to be neat.
> There have been times where my handwriting has been mistaken for a female's!


:lol my friend actually told me i have boy handwriting.
chicken scratch, basically.


----------



## AndyLT (Oct 8, 2007)

Sounds like a case of perfectionism.  If you want, as an exercise you could try writing a messy letter on purpose.

In my mind, handwriting is supposed to be a little messy. That way it reveals personality.


----------



## Lumiere (Jun 13, 2009)

AndyLT said:


> Sounds like a case of perfectionism.  If you want, as an exercise you could try writing a messy letter on purpose.
> 
> In my mind, handwriting is supposed to be a little messy. That way it reveals personality.


Yes, I agree. It's only if my writing is going to be read by others that I become so anxious, though. I write a journal and that's always just written straight out in ink. Because no one will ever read it, I'm not so anxious over it. It's often quite messy, which I dislike a little, but it doesn't bother me at all and, as you say, it has more personality and character to it.

I have to write a birthday card to someone this morning. I'll write it messily and without using a pencil and see what happens.
Thanks.


----------



## britisharrow (Jun 18, 2009)

Yes I understand this.


----------



## fade2black (Sep 7, 2009)

I don't go to those extreme measures, but I hate my handwriting. It looks like chicken scratch and it's not very girly at all. When I have to write a letter or even sign my name I get so frustrated because of the way it looks. If it's a letter I'm writing I usually re-write it a gazillion times until I like it or until I get fed up and type it out on the computer. And yes, I am a perfectionist but it's not why I get annoyed. I really do hate my handwriting and no matter how many times I practice it never gets any better.


----------



## kos (May 19, 2009)

ya that really sounds like ocd to me man.


----------



## Georgina 22 (Jan 4, 2009)

I can write things straight out using a pen, but I worry and try to make my handwriting nice and neat, and so that it looks like its been written by an adult and not a little kid. I am more anxious to get my handwriting neat if I have recieved a card/letter etc from someone with really stylish or neat handwriting then I'll try to make more effort to make mine neat too. And I also like to give that impression of 'Oh shes got nice handwriting'


----------



## Lumiere (Jun 13, 2009)

I was beginning to think this was OCD, but after reading about AvPD last night and this morning, I think it's more a symptom of that.
My brother has OCD, so I've witnessed that first-hand.
Also, as I said, I can write reams of drivel in my journal without these safety measures and that's completely messy, but it doesn't bother me in the slightest. It's only if my writing is going to be read by others that I do everything I said in my first post; which makes me think it's linked to AvPD, because it's mainly fear of negative evaluation that drives it.

Anyway, I wrote a card out the other day like a normal person :roll and sent it. It was never a major problem as it didn't affect my life in a negative way, but I guess any dent in the symptoms is working towards some kind of recovery.


----------



## Smitten (Oct 30, 2006)

I have bad hand writing, and have obsessed over it in the past, but i don't care so much anymore. There are people i know whom i admire/respect and they happen to have poor handwriting, while some of the most uncreative, boring, and dumb people i know have impeccable writing. Therefore, I don't see writing skills holding much weight as reflection of who a person is.


----------



## Winx (Jul 15, 2021)

Lumiere said:


> Does anyone else here obsess over their handwriting?
> 
> If I write a letter or a birthday/Christmas card to someone or a postcard, I have to write everything (including the name/address on the envelope) out in pencil first, to make sure I don't mess it up and the writing doesn't look like it was written by a serial killer. I have to use a ruler on envelopes, too; so that it's not uneven and messy.
> Then, I go over it in pen, and once the ink has dried I erase the pencil lines; just in case they see the pencil and think I'm a simpleton (which I clearly am).
> ...


I used to write and rewrite the things I wrote just to make every single letter perfectly just because something in my mind told me I have to write it perfectly else I will feel a great suffocation and irritation just because that damn letter is quite tilted than the others. But this happens only sometimes most of the times I write and rewrite only if it's goo dirty .sometimes it can be quite unreasonable though.


----------



## CarpeLibrum (Jun 2, 2015)

I do practice my penmanship before writing cards and I use a ruler to make sure things are aligned. I don't think it's a part of my SA. I just think I take enough pride in my work to try and do a decent job at writing these things. Plus, I care enough about the other person to make sure the card looks nice. Like I put in the effort for them.


----------



## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

I have a few different handwriting styles I like to use, and it can be annoying to make a mistake, but I won’t care about it much. My writing is not usually in a straight line, so I should try to get better at that.


----------



## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

It almost feels weird to write by hand these days, as I rarely do it anymore.


----------

