# Am I Really That Ugly?



## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

My self confidence is ruined now, I've made the slightest bit of progress just understanding that there are others like me out there and now it's all gone. I am truly believing this now that I hear it so often... Someone called me ugly today... I am actually believing I am... *Does this ever happen to anyone else?*


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

There just being plain nasty don't take any notice.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

It's extremely hard not to notice sometimes... I will try harder not to notice next time I guess...


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## Rest or Real? (Apr 1, 2011)

Nobody is really that ugly, you included. Don't believe in all you retrieve.


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## MJM58 (Jan 29, 2011)

It's happened to me many times before, but I've gotten to the point at which my apparent ugliness doesn't concern me much anymore. I have bigger things to be concerned with, like my social awkwardness. Hopefully, you'll find you've gotten to that point someday, too.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

I hate being socially awkward, I can't stand up for myself much and my only self defense is to cry... This makes me feel ugly on the inside as well...


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

Thats not good Emily sending you an E hug


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Just figured others might want to see me... Please don't be negative, it's part of my confidence booster class, I have to put myself out there, so I though y not show it to the people who care most....


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## Lisa (Jul 8, 2006)

People call others ugly to hurt them. By taking them seriously you are giving them power over you. I doubt that you are ugly. They just want to make you feel bad.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

I understand it but it feels like a ton of bricks on my heart to see that people at my school dot like me...


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## Kennnie (Oct 21, 2010)

your ****in hot 

ur like a 8.9


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

^its easy to say but not as easy to believe, or reinforce positive thoughts about it for that matter...


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## Help please (Dec 9, 2011)

It's people who say this stuff, who are really shallow, just don't listen to them or take it in. I bet you are not ugly...

I get really paranoid because I sometimes get the idea that some people are laughing at me...


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

^ I have a picture posted above.... And I feel like that a lot 2....


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

Wow...you're cute.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

😳 you're probably the first person to ever say that... I need my inhaler now....


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## Joe (May 18, 2010)

Its hard to believe it if your feeling sad, I think im ugly as well so I know what its like. But your a pretty girl and shouldn't be worrying, anyone who says otherwise is just doing it to be mean.


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

There is no way your ugly.


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## Kennnie (Oct 21, 2010)

i use to havve bdd also so i get your point lol


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

I'm very confused... Are u saying this to make me feel better? All my life I've been told I was ugly and now I'm pretty?


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## Yeezus92 (Dec 30, 2011)

who said it a guy or girl?


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## Propaganda (Oct 26, 2010)

If you want a honest opinion shoot me a PM with a few pictures and I will tell you my opinion. My background is being male and I've been interacting with the female sex for over a decade. I offer this because, IMO, everyone offering opinions on a low resolution color distorted picture is full of fluff.

Or just post a few pictures on hotornot. But, if you do, make sure your follow the basic photography rules for composition.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Everyone says it, it's just that today made my heart brake.


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## iRock365 (Nov 10, 2011)

It can be hard when it feels like all you ever hear are negative comments. I felt that way for a while. Sometimes even when you get a few nice compliments you don't pay attention to them and only focus on the negative. It seems sometimes like the bad outweighs the good. But everyone is beautiful In their own way. And there is someone, somewhere, who finds you to be attractive.


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## Kennnie (Oct 21, 2010)

your ****in hot **** sakes any man who kill to have u by his side including me

i use to think extactly the same way


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Propaganda here is another photo for you... I am in a confidence booster class and I'm not completely happy with myself and the way I look... I am sorry but color distorted pics r all ur gonna get...


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## iRock365 (Nov 10, 2011)

P.S. we tend to be really hard on ourselves a lot of the time, and usually see ourselves as much worse and less than we really truly are. Also you might be thinking that if it wasn't true, then why would people say it? Well those particular people might feel that way about you, but not EVERYONE does.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Irock365 you are very smart, you are "insightful" if that is the right word?


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## Kennnie (Oct 21, 2010)

lets date, i love insecure good looking chicks


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

... No thanks.^


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## Yeezus92 (Dec 30, 2011)

ShyGirl123 said:


> Propaganda here is another photo for you... I am in a confidence booster class and I'm not completely happy with myself and the way I look... I am sorry but color distorted pics r all ur gonna get...


nothing wrong here


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Huh? ^


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## ainsleigh (Dec 6, 2011)

I think the easiest thing is to do away with defining yourself according to the labels of others and also labeling yourself. I know its hard because it's what we're used to. This is what works for me though.

Even compliments can have a negative effect on self worth if you place too much on them. 

People say things sometimes as a projection of how they feel - they feel ugly or insecure, they call you ugly. Or they compare you to something else - but how do comparisons work when it comes to unique human beings. Other people's opinions and labels will always be subjective... 

I gave up caring about what people thought about me too much. Its just exhausting. It's like a roller coaster. One minute your pretty. Next your ugly. Next your boring...External validation is always destined to feelings of disappointment when you feel insecure inside.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

^ I understand that completely and agree with you...


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## Renea2011 (Nov 9, 2011)

MJM58 said:


> It's happened to me many times before, but I've gotten to the point at which my apparent ugliness doesn't concern me much anymore. I have bigger things to be concerned with, like my social awkwardness. Hopefully, you'll find you've gotten to that point someday, too.


This! ^

Should not focus too much on looks but other issues. We all going to get old and ugly someday.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

That's not what I'm getting at, and that wasn't even my original question to begin with... Read my question it's in the **'s....


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## Joe (May 18, 2010)

ShyGirl123 said:


> I'm very confused... Are u saying this to make me feel better? All my life I've been told I was ugly and now I'm pretty?


 I wouldn't of posted if i thought you were ugly


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

I can't help but think of these comments as sarcastic, I'm sorry... This is just SO out of the ordinary for me...


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

^ I am very sorry, I didn't mean to come across as ungrateful of you guys...


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## Propaganda (Oct 26, 2010)

The new picture is better than the other one in the sense that details are available. 

You would turn my head, alas, with a sigh because of the age gap.


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## Syndacus (Aug 9, 2011)

People are usually very conniving when it comes to looks. Either the person who said you were ugly is insecure or sees themselves as ugly but don't want to admit it themselves so they rail on another about it and try to bring them down so their not so lonely.

You have nice features, your face is cute, very feminine features. Everything fits on you proportionately so your face doesn't look weird or gawky at all. You know you see some people that have giant foreheads, huge noses, horse-faces, etc. If I was your age, I would ask you out, but feel shy because you're attractive. I would still ask you out, but I'll get arrested for dating jailbait...


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

^ haha wow? But then y doesn't anyone at my school like me? Is it bc of social anxiety?


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## Syndacus (Aug 9, 2011)

ShyGirl123 said:


> ^ haha wow? But then y doesn't anyone at my school like me? Is it bc of social anxiety?


Either you give off a bad attitude around people or you're really pessimistic. People like happy, funny people to hang with them. Someone who could take a joke and laugh it off without getting super-sensitive. Next time someone tells you you're ugly, just laugh it off and give a snarky reply back.


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## Onomatopoeia (May 27, 2011)

ainsleigh said:


> I think the easiest thing is to do away with defining yourself according to the labels of others and also labeling yourself. I know its hard because it's what we're used to. This is what works for me though.
> 
> Even compliments can have a negative effect on self worth if you place too much on them.
> 
> ...


Kudos on the solid advice. Very well thought out and put together! Made my day, actually. I've been obsessing over external validation for far too long...


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## Onomatopoeia (May 27, 2011)

ShyGirl123 said:


> Propaganda here is another photo for you... I am in a confidence booster class and I'm not completely happy with myself and the way I look... I am sorry but color distorted pics r all ur gonna get...


IMHO, based on the picture provided, you are a very cute girl! Try not to be so hard on yourself and keep smiling  I understand it is easier said than done. As a vehemently self-critical individual, I am never satisfied either...


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## MadRivera (Jan 12, 2012)

Honestly...
100% You look really good-I am _not_ saying that to be nice- you're not the least bit unattractive-There must be some seriously sick & twisted people at your school, because someone has really screwed with your head- Keep going to therapy.


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## Joe (May 18, 2010)

ShyGirl123 said:


> ^ haha wow? But then y doesn't anyone at my school like me? Is it bc of social anxiety?


People don't give quiet people a chance usually. Theres a few people in my year at school that I think have confidence issues, I don't actually speak to any of them but they seem very freindly and kind so maybe if theres anyone else in your school with confidence issues you could try and become freinds with them, then if you start to feel more confident because of it you will probably be able to make new friends more easily.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

There is no one at my school like me... There is only this one girl who on occasions comes in and is super sad, I'm pretty sure shes bi polar tho...


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Syndacus said:


> ShyGirl123 said:
> 
> 
> > ^ haha wow? But then y doesn't anyone at my school like me? Is it bc of social anxiety?
> ...


I tend to give off bad vibes... I am tone def, so I don't know what tone of voice I'm using (I also can't base sarcasm on voice either) so I have a very tough time...


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## jd323 (Dec 18, 2011)

You look perfectly normal to me


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## crookedsmile (Dec 29, 2011)

ShyGirl123 said:


> My self confidence is ruined now, I've made the slightest bit of progress just understanding that there are others like me out there and now it's all gone. I am truly believing this now that I hear it so often... Someone called me ugly today... I am actually believing I am... *Does this ever happen to anyone else?*


Yes. I was made fun of a lot when I was younger. It didn't bother until these two jerks came up to me and this other girl (that gets picked on as well) and asked, "Why are you two soooo ugly?!" But that was in grade school..kids can be obnoxious.

But you know what? No one is ugly. There is no right definition for beauty because it lies in the eyes of the beholder.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

No, you're not ugly.

Sometimes, people say things like that to make themselves feel better/feel more superior. It's crap. Don't listen to it.


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## artynerd (Sep 3, 2011)

I dont think u are ugly and it shouldnt matter what other people think of u. 
cos its just going to make u unhappy. plus ur not ugly, just because 1 person doesnt think u r, doesnt mean that the truth.

Anyways, i think confidence is really beautiful.

I was feeling like u before, but not that much now.

this website cheers me up: http://uglypeopleproblems.tumblr.com/

^ it doesnt mean ur ugly, some people think they are, but they not. It cheers me up 
Anyways u will feel alot better if you smile about it, cos ur just hurtin ur own feelings if u continue this way.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

^ I agree in a way...


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## Doctorius (Sep 12, 2011)

Very cute girl. Just build some confidence! Most people and mostly high school kids are hateful and jealous beings so dont pay much attention to statements like "Oh you're ugly!" and "Oh you're too fat to get a boyfriend"


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Surprisingly I haven't gotten the fat bit yet, but I has gotten the anorexic bit, I'd post a pic but with the hole "just getting used to the fact that I'm me bit" So I'm just going to c if anyone cares and asks for it (probably not)....


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## Jcoj613 (May 1, 2011)

I was called ugly once in highschool by some bully. They probably did not mean it.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Hehe sometimes it scary how much I'm right....


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## Olesya (May 8, 2011)

you are actually very cute, and please just try to remember that other people's opinions of you don't really matter. you are the most important person in your life, and you need to feel good about yourself.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Olesya said:


> you are actually very cute, and please just try to remember that other people's opinions of you don't really matter. you are the most important person in your life, and you need to feel good about yourself.


Thanks, you are good at giving advice...


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## wesdtrack (Jan 17, 2012)

*clicks ur picture* 
 you are really freaking cute !


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

😳^ thanks....


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## river1 (Jan 12, 2012)

No you aren't.. best believe it.


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## Retronia (Dec 18, 2011)

When I was going form my college dorm to the city, some boys stopped in they car and called me ugly.
So they just stopped to call me incredible ugly, so yeah you are not alone!
And btw. dont mind those idiots!!!!!
You are way more smarter to believe something some dummy said!


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Retronia said:


> When I was going form my college dorm to the city, some boys stopped in they car and called me ugly.
> So they just stopped to call me incredible ugly, so yeah you are not alone!
> And btw. dont mind those idiots!!!!!
> You are way more smarter to believe something some dummy said!


Well I hope those meanies get in a car accident  I hope my meanies do 2 (lol then there wouldn't be anyone at y school, YAY!)


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

ShyGirl123 said:


> Propaganda here is another photo for you... I am in a confidence booster class and I'm not completely happy with myself and the way I look... I am sorry but color distorted pics r all ur gonna get...


No you're not ugly


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## enfield (Sep 4, 2010)

The reason you don't have friends is very likely because of SA. There is no way in the world it is because of how you look.


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## BehindTheseHazelEyes (Oct 27, 2009)

Retronia said:


> When I was going form my college dorm to the city, some boys stopped in they car and called me ugly.
> So they just stopped to call me incredible ugly, so yeah you are not alone!
> And btw. dont mind those idiots!!!!!
> You are way more smarter to believe something some dummy said!


 Oh my gosh! That's horrible! This is one of those incidents where I would pay to be in the same place as those guys when someone comes along and bruises their egos. It's also unfortunate how people abuse the right to freedom of speech, isn't it?


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

BehindTheseHazelEyes said:


> Retronia said:
> 
> 
> > When I was going form my college dorm to the city, some boys stopped in they car and called me ugly.
> ...


Yah... It tends to happen quite a bit more frequently then everyone seems to think it does..


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## Kyrsta (Jan 23, 2012)

This issue, for me, was what made the doctor tell me to go to therapy. I don't dress like the pretty girls, they have better teeth, they have shiny hair, they have smaller cheeks, they are everything I am not. And if they are considered the pretty girls, what does that make me?

I understand you completely and when I go to the therapist on the 6th I will relay what they have said to me.

Who says what pretty is anyway? My fiance' loves me despite my imprefections (and I have A LOT) so maybe the opinions of those you don't love will be out weighed by those you do.


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## DAM71392 (Jan 28, 2012)

awww its ok ill be there for you  ill be ur Friend


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## Grapefruits (Oct 26, 2010)

How do they say this stuff? Do they just say to you as you walk by "you're ugly"?


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## Sourdog (Sep 13, 2011)

C'mon you must of provoked them somehow, who the hell walks up to a person and calls them ugly for no reason??? You look fine to me, are these people just random people who come up to you or are they people you know?


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## rapidfox1 (Sep 13, 2010)

Remember that beauty is in the eye of beholder. Also, you're not ugly.


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## slightlyawkward (Feb 16, 2011)

I would love to look like you.


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## NatureFellow (Jun 14, 2011)

slightlyawkward said:


> I would love to look like you.


I suddenly have the urge to visit hogwarts....

ahem!

On topic...candy mountain....unicorns!...no you're not ugly!

....who stole my kidney?


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Grapefruits said:


> How do they say this stuff? Do they just say to you as you walk by "you're ugly"?


No they are a bit more discreet and do things like write it on your locker in sharpie or lip stick, otherwise then I'd have names...


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## weil (Jun 8, 2011)

Post a proper picture from a normal angle so we can see whether you're ugly or not. I will give you my honest opinion.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

This thread is worthless without pics.


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## kanra (Nov 27, 2011)

I've heard girls in my high school try and point out the flaws in my appearance, like "Her eyebrows are too dark" and BS like that. But 4 guys liked me (sorry, I hope that didn't come off as bragging, just making a point)so I can't have been ugly. (I don't really like my face though anyway) But like others said, there isn't a concrete definition of "ugly."

Teenagers do crap like that.
In my school they thought I was weird because I didn't talk and rumors spread that I was "creepy," and they just needed to find an excuse to put me down instead of "she stares a lot." Or "she's creepy." Lack of originality, I guess?

You aren't ugly at all. Those were just as*holes at your school being as*holes, lol. Try not to take it personally, they just need to put people down to make themselves feel good. Did guys say you were ugly? Guys have made fun of my appearance talking to each other but were almost always polite when talking to me and liked making me laugh. It was wierd. (Sorry about bringing the topic back to me constantly, I just can't find many other ways to talk about this kind of thing) if it was girls talking about you they could have been jealous of you or something or just wanted to make themselves feel better. You're pretty cute, so they all probably want to raise their own self-esteem or something. Try not to worry about it


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## LWR (Feb 27, 2012)

lol, from the look of your avatar, you surely dont look as ugly as i am ;P i even posted my picture in "post a picture of yourself right now" and didn't even get a single reply  

you're not ugly  , i dont think i am ugly, even though i feel like it, but thats how i was born


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## fallen18 (Aug 25, 2011)

Your not ugly at all your beautiful and don't let anyone make you second guess it. :squeeze


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## Princess143 (Jan 30, 2012)

Oh gosh honey, highschool was so hard for me, I so understand what you are going through, people try to make you feel bad because they feel bad about themselves. You just be the best you that you can be and love yourself, you have something to offer the world, everyone has a gift. You yourself are a gift, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and to me you are truly beautiful.


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## Random Dude (Feb 27, 2012)

Hi. Just thought I'd put my 2 cents in. I completely agree with what all the other people are saying. Based on the pictures you provided- you look beautiful. There is no reason we would lie to you as well, we are probably never going to meet you in person so we can say whatever we want . However, like some people mentioned, if you want a honest AND an *accurate* answer, you should put up a better quality photo of yourself. The truth can be a scary thing right? Of course you don't have to if you don't want to, I fully understand you and I would probably not be able to do it myself .


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## dreamers disease 97 (Feb 9, 2012)

Honey I think you're beautiful  I'd like to see a picture of you smiling because it looks like it would light up the world


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

LOL, thanks guys <3 and I'll post a picture of myself smiling, even if I have to force myself LOL

5 Minutes Later: yah, I'm forcing myself....


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## Toppington (Oct 26, 2011)

kanra said:


> "Her eyebrows are too dark"


Lolwut. I don't even... How stupid is the average teen these days? How can your eyebrows be too dark? Maybe too thick, but wow. I'm ashamed to be part of this generation sometimes.


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## kanra (Nov 27, 2011)

Toppington said:


> Lolwut. I don't even... How stupid is the average teen these days? How can your eyebrows be too dark? Maybe too thick, but wow. I'm ashamed to be part of this generation sometimes.


Exactly...
And my eyebrows are a little darker than my hair, which is kind of a lightish dirty blonde. And they aren't thick at all. They probably don't even pass as brown. That said, compared to my hair, my eyebrows are dark, but otherwise...

(Lol, sorry for spamming the thread with a description of my eyebrows)


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

kanra said:


> Toppington said:
> 
> 
> > Lolwut. I don't even... How stupid is the average teen these days? How can your eyebrows be too dark? Maybe too thick, but wow. I'm ashamed to be part of this generation sometimes.
> ...


It's ok, the main part if this was "has this ever happened to anyone else"


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## Jessie203 (Feb 20, 2008)

I'm sorry that happened to you.

That has happened to me a million times. I'm too fat, too ugly, whatever... after I turned 19 I heard a lot less of it. High school is THE WORST for that stuff. Everybody is insecure and trying to one up someone in anyway they can. And people who tease the nerdy type, well they are all usually retarded jocks who are in fact envious of the smart people. It makes sense since we will progress in life and they will be pumping our gas. Karma takes it's course, always.


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## mirrussia (Feb 17, 2012)

Hi ShyGirl123! You can send me your picture  And will send you my feedback 
Sometime it's quite important to just get a compliment yourself, why not?

And by the way, shame of people who say to someone ugly. Brrr. It's so rude.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Pretty sure my pictures all ready on here, isn't it? Check the previous comments by me


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## mirrussia (Feb 17, 2012)

ShyGirl123 said:


> Pretty sure my pictures all ready on here, isn't it? Check the previous comments by me


Sort of... but, I can't see pure photo... can't your face well 
All my like I've been thinking I'am an ugly person. Why did I do that? I'am serious. That was the way I have felt.


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

mirrussia said:


> ShyGirl123 said:
> 
> 
> > Pretty sure my pictures all ready on here, isn't it? Check the previous comments by me
> ...


Ik feeling ugly sucks


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## Later (May 5, 2011)

I'm sorry but compliments aren't going to help this girl's low self esteem
Yes for 5 minutes, then she's going to come back for more, you guys are just feeding into her assurance-dependent low confidence

If you ask online like yahoo or hot-or-not, I'm sure people are going to say ugly, very rarely someone comes up to you and says "You're ugly!" unless you have somehow offended them or asked for attention

Everyone has felt this way at one point of their lives, I myself have felt this way in middle school predominantly, relying on other people's comments will make it worse, you grow out of it, you should learn to live with what you have. People have different dislikes and likes, not one person likes exactly what the other likes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder


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## UgShy (Mar 6, 2012)

look fine, don't worry about it. people are just being jerks


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## TryingToBeAccepted (Mar 6, 2012)

*Come on....*

You've got to be kidding me. I think you are gorgeous, and believe me, I know what it feels like to feel ugly. I know people tell me I'm pretty just to make me feel better, but honestly, you ARE pretty. And plus, you can't expect people to think you're pretty if you can't believe it yourself. 
XOXO


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## mirrussia (Feb 17, 2012)

UgShy said:


> look fine, don't worry about it. people are just being jerks


Agree! That was my point! :yes


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

TryingToBeAccepted said:


> I know people tell me I'm pretty just to make me feel better,
> XOXO


I'm wondering if that's not the case for me :/


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## ShyGirl123 (Jan 10, 2012)

Later said:


> I'm sorry but compliments aren't going to help this girl's low self esteem
> Yes for 5 minutes, then she's going to come back for more, you guys are just feeding into her assurance-dependent low confidence
> 
> If you ask online like yahoo or hot-or-not, I'm sure people are going to say ugly, very rarely someone comes up to you and says "You're ugly!" unless you have somehow offended them or asked for attention
> ...


Maybe you don't understand something, I have to go to school daily, get called rude names and get bullied because I'm me! You're saying I get bullied because I say "Look at me!"?! Listen up pal, if you were me you'd understand, I don't walk around and tick people off and call attention to myself! I do the exact opposite! I'm sick of getting advice that people give that they've never even used, and I'm sick of my locker being stuffed with hate mail! So just stop bc I'm not in the mood for any of this crap!


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