# How my life changed in the last year



## Dalmat (May 5, 2013)

It's been a while since I visited this forum last time. I just want to share with you some positive things that happened in my life since then.

Two and a half years ago I started recovering program "Overcoming social anxiety step by step". My social life was completely dead back then. I had only one friend, and I didn't see him more than once a month. Also, it has been a long 7 years since I touched a woman last time. All I had was my job.

One year ago I started going out often as my exposure recovery. I realised girls are crazy about me. I never knew that before because my SA inhibited me all my life. I had two gfs since then but I couldn't keep them for very long because I never learned some basic relationship skills. The first one left her long term boyfriend because of me and the second one was a real super woman, way out of everyone's league, the whole town was jelaous. I loved them both and I suffered, but I learned a lot and I'm chasing the third one already 

Now I have five close friends. That kind of friends who call you just to ask how are you. Still not enough to fullify my social needs, but much better than one year ago.

I even entered some illegal bussiness, just to see what I'm capable for  I bought an awesome car and moved away from it.

My SA still kicks in from time to time, but it's nothing like before. My confidence is strong. I still have to widen my social cyrcle and find some new activities to fill my time.

Just wanted to share my story of change. Wish you all the best my friends


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Congrats bro. One hell of a year. Talk about facing fears. I'm jealous.


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## sad1231234 (Jul 10, 2016)

Thats great!


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## Flutterlee (Aug 11, 2016)

Dude. Amazing. Most ppl who don't have SA cant say they have 5 close friends. You're such an encouragement. Im trying to gradually expose myself as well i think its essential for me to network in order to advance in my career . and with SA its hard to network and make connections with people. Eventually i wanna get to a place where it's not so terrifying. Keep going dude be the best you.


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## Dalmat (May 5, 2013)

Flutterlee[/QUOTE said:


> Well, my friends are mostly married and have their own lives, so I still spend much time alone. But it makes a huge difference when you have someone to go out. Or when they call to ask how are you during your hard times. I just need a new girlfriend now, and I'm working on it
> 
> Exposure can make wonders, but it's very important to start from the small things. And when you start feeling ok, you could still feel horrible the next day. In that moment, it is important to realise it's just the way it works, progress is never linear, it's always ups and downs.


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## Paul (Sep 26, 2005)

Congrats on getting rich from your criminal enterprise and successfully stealing somebody else's girlfriend. You're an inspirational role model.


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## Findedeux (Mar 16, 2012)

It's nice to hear about people's positive experiences.

Was the program the primary tool that helped you change?


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## slowlyimproving (Jan 2, 2014)

Congrats on everything minus the illegal stuff.


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## Dalmat (May 5, 2013)

Paul said:


> Congrats on getting rich from your criminal enterprise and successfully stealing somebody else's girlfriend. You're an inspirational role model.


I never told I'm a good person. I'm just glad I finally started to live a life. Still far from my full potential, but everything is better than sitting home alone all day like I used to do.


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## Dalmat (May 5, 2013)

Findedeux said:


> It's nice to hear about people's positive experiences.
> 
> Was the program the primary tool that helped you change?


Yes, it has all the tools you need. People just have to realise there is a lot of work. At least two or three years to start changing your anxious way of thinking and safe behavior.

Later I found two books which I also found helpful: Charisma myth and No more mr nice guy.


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