# feeling like you don't belong...anywhere



## forbidden (Oct 25, 2011)

I know it could be all in the way i think about it ,but it seems everywhere i go, a forum, a chat room, gatherings IRL, family gatherings...i just dont seem to belong there...like im drifting through...and even though my presence can sometimes be acknowledged, most of the time its like i dont exist ,simply because im too afraid to express myself since people are so massively critical these days and i dont want to deal with the conflict of that kind of interaction...i feel so alone and unwanted...misunderstood and uninteresting...sorry just venting...does anyone else get like this?


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## Setolac (Jul 26, 2009)

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## I wish i was normal (May 28, 2012)

Yes, this describes how i feel pretty much the whole time. I feel completely disconnected from the world, like i don't belong anywhere, like i'm not good enough for anyone. I never have anything interesting to say and just generally don't fit in anywhere. Because of SA, i've missed out on so much that i've done nothing interesting with my life. Everyone has so many fantastic, funny, interesting stories to tell, but i feel as though i have nothing.


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## pitbull2591 (May 25, 2012)

I feel the SAME way.. I feel left out of everything and like there's something wrong with me. Like one time I went to an ICP show in woecester and I thought if I painted my face and everything I could be accepted for once, but even then people wouldn't talk to me even when I tried to talk to them and people where extremely rude and even started to get violent with me. This happens to me everywhere like even at my job that I've been at for over a year people still don't talk to me.. its hard to be yourself these days because of the highly critical society we live in but lately its been even worse. Most my family doesn't even call or see how I am, and you would think since I'm one of the youngest they would call or something. It just seems people easily blame me for **** because I feel some way responsible for some reason. I am alone and don't have many friends, and my old friends completely ditches me for a year then I got back with them but felt out of place so I left them. Your not the only person feeling alone and I hope you meet someone with similar interest and is understanding in your near future  god bless


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## SweetNSour82 (Dec 19, 2011)

Yes I feel the same. I know I should probably add to this, but.. meh.. what everyone else said!


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## Squirrelevant (Jul 27, 2008)

I feel like this each day. I often get intense episodes of feeling completely worthless and unwanted when I probably shouldn't but, at the same time, I think there is considerable truth to me just not being a great person to be around. I think it's partly a lack of social skills, partly severe depression and just that I've lived a rather joyless life in general. I rarely experience carefree moments or have much happiness to draw from and share with others, as much as I'd like that to be the case. The fact that I don't relate to others well is also the major cause of my depression, so it becomes a cycle. I think there are people out there that appreciate me for who I am currently, although I'd like to be appreciated more for being a positive force in others' lives. I'd also like to be able to show more appreciation for the people I enjoy being around myself. I want to be someone that people look forward to seeing, but I don't think I am, and it's my fault. It's a disheartening fact to deal with, but it's something I can work on to some extent.


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## forbidden (Oct 25, 2011)

I wish i was normal said:


> Yes, this describes how i feel pretty much the whole time. I feel completely disconnected from the world, like i don't belong anywhere, like i'm not good enough for anyone. I never have anything interesting to say and just generally don't fit in anywhere. Because of SA, i've missed out on so much that i've done nothing interesting with my life. Everyone has so many fantastic, funny, interesting stories to tell, but i feel as though i have nothing.


I know how you feel...i feel as if the things i find interesting, no one else really does, so they just disregard everything i say just cause they arent interested. I dont understand people. I put myself out there and act interested in everything others have to say and yet never get the same acknowledgement in return. Frustrating...lol...we do miss out on a lot with this disorder and thats probably one of the worst parts about it.


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## forbidden (Oct 25, 2011)

pitbull2591 said:


> I feel the SAME way.. I feel left out of everything and like there's something wrong with me. Like one time I went to an ICP show in woecester and I thought if I painted my face and everything I could be accepted for once, but even then people wouldn't talk to me even when I tried to talk to them and people where extremely rude and even started to get violent with me. This happens to me everywhere like even at my job that I've been at for over a year people still don't talk to me.. its hard to be yourself these days because of the highly critical society we live in but lately its been even worse. Most my family doesn't even call or see how I am, and you would think since I'm one of the youngest they would call or something. It just seems people easily blame me for **** because I feel some way responsible for some reason. I am alone and don't have many friends, and my old friends completely ditches me for a year then I got back with them but felt out of place so I left them. Your not the only person feeling alone and I hope you meet someone with similar interest and is understanding in your near future  god bless


Often things that happen with people make me believe even more that most ppl are s*** and really dont care about anyone else but themselves. We live in such a selfish world and its so sad that we have to suffer for it. All of the friends i once had are now gone now and i dont think id fit in anymore now anyway even if they did care...sad times! Lol...*hug* thanks for the encouragement and i hope the same for you!


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## forbidden (Oct 25, 2011)

pointy said:


> I feel like this each day. I often get intense episodes of feeling completely worthless and unwanted when I probably shouldn't but, at the same time, I think there is some truth to me just not being a great person to be around. I think it's partly a lack of social skills and partly severe depression and a rather joyless life in general. I rarely experience carefree moments or have much happiness to draw from and share with others, as much as I'd like that to be the case. The fact that I don't relate to others well is also the major cause of my depression, so it becomes a cycle. I think there are people out there that appreciate me for what I am, although I'd like to be appreciated for being a positive force in people's lives, someone that people look forward to seeing. I don't think I am, and it my responsibility. It's a disheartening fact to deal with, but it's something I can and should work on to some extent.


*hug* i hope you find your way...and i dont think you're not a great person to be around...i get along with a whole range of people and even though it can be difficult to get through to people with depression and anxiety, which i have myself so i understand, people are still worth knowing. I enjoy being in the company of like-minded people and i can empathize with your pain. A lot of people cant empathize and that sets us apart from them. Im sure you have many interesting thoughts that anyone would be lucky to hear. Please take care!


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## delvikingz59 (May 28, 2012)

It seems like the only place for me is a place were no one is.............


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## radiancia (Apr 6, 2011)

Absolutely. I was just thinking this yesterday. Everytime I go into any situation, I immediately gravitate towards making myself invisible, preferring to be a spectator rather than a participant. I look for reasons why I dont fit in with this particular group or place and that justifies me just hanging back and not getting involved. I always think these people are too different from me, theres too many people who already know each other- why bother?, they're all interested in ____ and Im not. etc etc. Problem is...there never comes a time when I DO feel like 'I want to be part of this'...never.


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

I can't even remember how many websites and Web communities I've abandoned because I just couldn't fit in...I can't get too comfortable here lest this become the next in the long long list. :roll So yes, I know that feeling. Even among groups of people interested in the same things I am, I don't belong, and that hurts even more than not belonging to the general public.


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## pitbull2591 (May 25, 2012)

There's a place for everyone.. I wish I could meet more people who understand people like us. I always put people ahead of me and even loose on purpose to make people happy like they won, but it gets to a point where they start walking over you. Don't let anyone change who you are, only let them help you grow because no one is perfect but it should a destination that people should strive for to there best abilities.


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## forbidden (Oct 25, 2011)

radiancia said:


> Absolutely. I was just thinking this yesterday. Everytime I go into any situation, I immediately gravitate towards making myself invisible, preferring to be a spectator rather than a participant. I look for reasons why I dont fit in with this particular group or place and that justifies me just hanging back and not getting involved. I always think these people are too different from me, theres too many people who already know each other- why bother?, they're all interested in ____ and Im not. etc etc. Problem is...there never comes a time when I DO feel like 'I want to be part of this'...never.


Being invisible has its advantages


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## forbidden (Oct 25, 2011)

tehuti88 said:


> I can't even remember how many websites and Web communities I've abandoned because I just couldn't fit in...I can't get too comfortable here lest this become the next in the long long list. :roll So yes, I know that feeling. Even among groups of people interested in the same things I am, I don't belong, and that hurts even more than not belonging to the general public.


Ive done the same with many forums as well...its pretty discouraging...


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## AnxietyGirlx (Feb 26, 2011)

Me too.


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## Maninthebox84 (May 3, 2012)

I feel this way at work.


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## Freiheit (Dec 8, 2008)

I feel this way all the time now. Most people hate me because of SA and it feels very uncomfortable to be in social situations.


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## IllmaticJJ (Dec 29, 2013)

I feel like this often


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## Pierre1 (Apr 25, 2013)

Sometimes I feel like that but mainly in situations or places that are new to me.


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## handsup (Jun 22, 2013)

I belong to the hell, brother!


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

I've never belonged anywhere my entire life.


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## corbeaublanc (Jan 29, 2013)

handsup said:


> I belong to the hell, brother!


^


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## Lorn (Apr 7, 2014)

Try: No one else shares my beliefs, my spirituality, or my ambitions. No matter how many years, conversations, or topics I go through searching.


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## Lonelyguy111 (Oct 14, 2013)

Felt that way all my life and especially tonight.

I go to this coffeehouse with free music on Saturday nights and I usually feel pretty good while I am there, but tonight I was my usual outcast self, hovering in the corner not saying much to anyone just watching people have a good time. I felt totally out of place. I felt like an alien among normal people.

I have been like that since I was a little kid.
Terrible and terrifying feeling.


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## Lonelyguy111 (Oct 14, 2013)

Freiheit said:


> I feel this way all the time now. Most people hate me because of SA and it feels very uncomfortable to be in social situations.


Yes they do. Almost hate us.

People think our quietness and lack of laughter and happiness is due to our disliking them or that we disapprove of them somehow so they become offended by us. They do not realize that when someone comes up to us and wants to talk and chat it scares us to death and we freeze up and so forth and don't know what to say so they think we are being snobby and stuck up.

What a curse.


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## mattmc (Jun 27, 2013)

Lorn said:


> Try: No one else shares my beliefs, my spirituality, or my ambitions. No matter how many years, conversations, or topics I go through searching.


Well said. That's exactly how I feel.


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## Justlittleme (Oct 21, 2013)

well being one of the most different sure i get that. i more than get that.


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## Marko3 (Mar 18, 2014)

Lonelyguy111 said:


> Yes they do. Almost hate us.
> 
> People think our quietness and lack of laughter and happiness is due to our disliking them or that we disapprove of them somehow so they become offended by us. They do not realize that when someone comes up to us and wants to talk and chat it scares us to death and we freeze up and so forth and don't know what to say so they think we are being snobby and stuck up.
> 
> What a curse.


hmmm.. yes....

but once u get to know each other, then ppl can see how good person u r...
it's just that like 30% of ppl make a image of u before u even start to talk... u just need to begin with ppl that r kind and cool and don't judge u by your looks... true its hard to find such group of ppl... but once u do.. take in all the kindness, open up to them and u ll start to believe ppl r originally good.. slowly ull get better...:yes


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## jazzman (Sep 23, 2011)

same here, very difficult to get out of hermit trap, TV surfing, waiting for someone to call or if you call, someone willing to talk to you longer than 30 sec...


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## ShatteredGlass (Oct 12, 2012)

I constantly feel like this. The only time I don't is at home, to be honest.


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## Lonelyguy111 (Oct 14, 2013)

radiancia said:


> Absolutely. I was just thinking this yesterday. Everytime I go into any situation, I immediately gravitate towards making myself invisible, preferring to be a spectator rather than a participant. I look for reasons why I dont fit in with this particular group or place and that justifies me just hanging back and not getting involved. I always think these people are too different from me, theres too many people who already know each other- why bother?, they're all interested in ____ and Im not. etc etc. Problem is...there never comes a time when I DO feel like 'I want to be part of this'...never.


You summed it up very well.
Thanks for posting this.


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## MindWarrior (May 4, 2014)

I'm new, and this is only my second post, but I most definitely relate to what you've said. I have never, ever felt as if I belonged. Anywhere. And since I remember having felt this way ever since my earliest childhood memories, I am assuming I will more than likely go to my grave feeling as though I never belonged.


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## ForeverInBloom (Oct 4, 2010)

This hits home. I'm sorry you feel this way OP, it sucks...

I always feel left out, mainly because I am not much of a talker. In university, I was at times asked to hang out with a group of high school classmates that happened to go to the university and it felt as if they asked me just out of pity. I didn't really talk to these people that much, only like 2 out of 6 and I'd always be quiet and stuff. Even now at a job I have, I don't talk to them much but like one since he's nice. I feel terrible.


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## Socialanxiety11 (Oct 3, 2011)

I never belong anywhere, i'm like an alien.


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## Dura ace (May 5, 2014)

This is me.Then I go and make things ten times worse cause Ill be in a good mood and say stupid things,not deliberatly just trying to have a laugh but obviously u come across as a weirdo if u never speak then suddenly start talking ****.And thats just on forums!In real life I get all panicky and start sweating and cant look people in the eye,I know myself what a weirdo I must come across and know I do from peoples reactions.Im waiting to hear about getting cbt which I hope will help


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## ZADY (Nov 11, 2013)

Yeahhhh. But I like to think that I am different and go my own way instead of being a follower. Be a leader?


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## fury5 (Nov 11, 2013)

My anxiety has been getting worse lately. And whenever that happens, I start to fear being around people. Things like going to walmart sound like a joke to me. I don't even want to go to gamestop (I'm a serious gamer). I manage to go to work just fine since I feel I belong, but lately even that has been changing.

Maybe it's all in my head, but that's kind of what anxiety is, isn't it? I haven't been on here in a while, but I kinda felt like venting on here today.


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## Dontknowanymore (Jun 15, 2014)

I have felt the same most of my life I don't know if it's me or it's the life I had as a child but I just wish that I could change everything about me. I don't belong anywhere and I don't know why I'm here I think of suicide constantly but don't have the guts or courage to do it and I would never tell anyone how I feel but who knows I believe one day I will get the courage up but till that day I just have to live feeling this way


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## A Void Ant (Mar 10, 2012)

Yeah, I know exactly how you feel. I never fit in. I have no "style" so I don't fit in to any "groups" and I can't relate to anyone. This is true on the internet as well. I used to play games a lot, but I stopped when I realized I couldn't make friends online. I feel like there's some aspect of life I was never taught, like there's some secret code everyone else knows that I don't, that they can sense I lack and resent me for it. Sometimes I wonder if I'm on the low end of the Autism spectrum or something. I know it's not true, that I am mostly paranoid, but that's just how it is I guess. Just another symptom of being conscious in a society that looks down upon higher consciousness. I just have to keep reminding myself that I don't have to be doing what everyone one else is doing. That usually keeps me going.


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## deliciousbassfingers (Jun 3, 2014)

The only place you could ever hope to be is in this present moment, in your body and mind, there is nowhere else to be.


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## musicman1965 (Aug 29, 2013)

I've found myself acting and talking the way others do, just to try to fit in. This method never worked and only served to make me feel foolish for trying to be someone other than myself.


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## pearlgrey (Jul 31, 2016)

Yes, I don't feel I belong anywhere. Not in real life and not even online. There's an online forum I've been part of for 7 and a half years and I still don't feel accepted even there. I know the logical thing to do would be to make an effort, but I feel like there's no point because I'm not worth it anyway.


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## andy0128 (Dec 19, 2003)

I'm not completely alone. Scattered throughout my life I've anaged to have a few friendships. On the internet i have found myself able to be more extrovert but i still haven't felt particularly liked. In the early days I'd be more controversial whole posting online but whereas some people can do that and still be liked i seemed to generate resentment. Even online though i struggled with smalltalk. I noticed that members who were good at getting laughs or engaging in trivial conversations tended to be the mist popular ones. I would get replies to my posts quite a lot which is something but i didnt feel these people were friends particularly.


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