# What's worse: no friends or no partner?



## Argamemnon (May 3, 2008)

What is worse according to you; having no partner or having no friends. To be precise: would you prefer having lots of friends but no partner, or having a partner but no friends?


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

Probably having no friends. Relationships can be unpredictable, while frendships tend to last longer. Firends are there for you after breakups, etc.

Not that I would really know. Just my take on it.


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## Slothrop (Aug 11, 2007)

No partner is worse, easily. I'm extremely averse to having lots of friends, actually.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

Uh, I'd rather "a partner but no friends".


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## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Not having a partner is far worse IMO...Plus I'm extremely introverted so I def don't want lots of friends...


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## X33 (Feb 13, 2005)

I would prefer having lots of friends rather than a single person because I don't want to put all my eggs in one basket. Extensive contacts/networking will make your life much easier and you will go farther ahead in your professional life and have more fun in your personal life.


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## FairleighCalm (May 20, 2007)

^I tend to agree with the abovers. A pool of friends that are just there for you, instead of there for "it" is really nice. ("it" does not mean sex, I think "it" means all those personally significant markers an exclusive relationship defines for a person socially).


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## User57854 (Dec 26, 2006)

-


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## holtby43 (Jan 1, 2008)

I'd have to say no partner.


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## venusfruit (May 9, 2008)

I would definitely prefer to have a partner, but I wish I had at least one good friend.


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## pariahgirl (Mar 26, 2008)

No friends is worse, I think partners come and go but friends, the good ones, stick with you. Plus I had boyfriends, I'm really miss female company at this point.


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## AdamCanada (Dec 6, 2003)

I would say no freinds. I am almost to the point where i don't have any freind but have a gf. Mabye if the situation were reversed my opinion would be different. I still have one good freind and several family members my age that i do stuff with though.


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## Argamemnon (May 3, 2008)

I currently have neither friends nor a partner. I have never had a partner. I myself am to blame for having no friends though, since I was the one who rejected them and eventually they stopped contacting me, which was bound to happen.


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## Raplovehate (Jan 15, 2008)

No friends man. A partner might last a year or so but a friend could last a lifetime.... Not to mention they could get you partners...


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## Neptunus (Oct 29, 2007)

AdrianG said:


> I would prefer having lots of friends rather than a single person because I don't want to put all my eggs in one basket.


 :ditto


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## palecadude (Jan 26, 2008)

I'll go with no partner... I've had friends so I sorta know what I'm missing


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

I've had friends, and haven't had friends. There are good and bad things to both situations.

I would say not having a good relationship is much worse than lack of friends. At least when all your friends are your gender and aren't friends with benefits. Being in a bad relationship where you can't get away from the other person easily would be the worst out if all the possibilities though.


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## Polar (Dec 16, 2006)

I'm gonna go with... no partner. Yeah.

One good friend is all I really need, methinks.


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## quietgal (Oct 18, 2007)

I'd rather have a partner than lots of friends...but that's just me.

Most of my friendships with other girls have been a little strained. Even with my best girlfriend there always seems to be an element of antagonism or competition.


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## mserychic (Oct 2, 2004)

Well I'm much happier now with my 2 friends and no gf than I was when I had a gf and no friends. Friends are more important in my life


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Argamemnon said:


> What is worse according to you; having no partner or having no friends. To be precise: would you prefer having lots of friends but no partner, or having a partner but no friends?


Having no friends.


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## tainted_ (Feb 20, 2008)

No partner is def worse...


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

I would rather have friends. If you have a partner, he/she is going to know you don't have any friends, so that might be a little ackward, depending on the situation, lol.


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## PGVan (May 22, 2004)

To me, your partner is the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with. If that person isn't your best friend, something is wrong.

Not having a partner is definitely the most depressing for me.


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## tainted_ (Feb 20, 2008)

PGVan said:


> To me, your partner is the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with. If that person isn't your best friend, something is wrong.
> 
> Not having a partner is definitely the most depressing for me.


 :ditto I agree. My partner is also my best friend... I have trouble relating to female friends so it is very important to me to have a partner


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## njodis (Nov 8, 2006)

I don't even want to have "a lot of friends" so I guess the other one wins by default. Although, I do sometimes hear that the whole "relationship" thing is pretty nice.


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## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

PGVan said:


> To me, your partner is the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with. If that person isn't your best friend, something is wrong.


 :ditto


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## Johnny_Genome (Nov 11, 2003)

When all your friends have partners life sucks.


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## learning07 (Jan 3, 2008)

I say no friends


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## mjatte (Feb 10, 2007)

I can't decide, you can't be happy without friends, in my opinion...I don't think I will ever find a girlfriend, unless I get friends first...


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

I hate those type of questions. It's like asking if a kick in the balls hurts more than a broken nose...both hurt, no?

friendless sucks and no partner sucks just as much.


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## aries (May 2, 2008)

a partner and no friends is okay
friends and no partner is tolerable


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## Drella (Dec 4, 2004)

No friends. 
I would assume that any relationship I am, hypothetically, involved in would end within a few weeks/months, because I am a total ballbuster (I assume I would be in this magical realm in which someone actually dates me, anyway). A friendship could possibly last forever (or until one of us gets cancer, and the other has to make a difficult decision involving nasal-gastric tubing.) So, yeah, I think having no friends is worse than not having a partner.


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## redstardude (Mar 10, 2008)

I would prefer to have friends


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## SadRosesAreBeautiful (May 15, 2008)

IllusionOfHappiness said:


> Probably having no friends. Relationships can be unpredictable, while frendships tend to last longer. Firends are there for you after breakups, etc.
> 
> Not that I would really know. Just my take on it.


I agree, although having a boyfriend would be nice...but I don't think having a bf is the solution to my SAD. Not that I would know either because I lack both. But I assume that friends tend to last longer. True friends, that is.


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## TorLin (Nov 14, 2006)

i don't know what to choose because they both leave you alone and lonely. (just in my experience)


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## RubyTuesday (Aug 3, 2007)

I think that it's easier to possibly have a partner when you have friends (or more than a very few number of friends -a good social life, in other words).

But when you have little to no friends and a poor social life -I bet that in most cases, this would also put pressure on your ability to have or keep a partner.

Plus, I think that it's generally a healthier sign when you have a good group of friends rather than rely solely on any one person for companionship.


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## BeNice (Jan 2, 2004)

I hardly ever hang out with anyone now, and I don't have any of my "own" friends now. They are all people I know through my sister and her boyfriend. It's really lonely. I spend a lot of time by myself and it's been really rough for me lately.


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## venusfruit (May 9, 2008)

Logan X said:


> I hate those type of questions. It's like asking if a kick in the balls hurts more than a broken nose...both hurt, no?
> 
> friendless sucks and no partner sucks just as much.


LOL  You are absolutely right!!


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## SadRosesAreBeautiful (May 15, 2008)

RubyTuesday said:


> I think that it's easier to possibly have a partner when you have friends (or more than a very few number of friends -a good social life, in other words).
> 
> But when you have little to no friends and a poor social life -I bet that in most cases, this would also put pressure on your ability to have or keep a partner.
> 
> Plus, I think that it's generally a healthier sign when you have a good group of friends rather than rely solely on any one person for companionship.


Agreed :ditto Good point.


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## ahmerw007 (Feb 11, 2008)

I would prefer to have friends if I had to choose between the two...unfortunately I have neither right now.


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## WhatsThePoint (Feb 6, 2008)

PGVan said:


> To me, your partner is the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with. If that person isn't your best friend, something is wrong.
> 
> Not having a partner is definitely the most depressing for me.


exactly my thoughts...


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## Prodigal Son (Dec 11, 2005)

No friends easily. I can function just fine with no girlfriend.


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## Untergang (May 19, 2008)

I have neither. What does that count as?


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## Argamemnon (May 3, 2008)

I think having no friends and no partner is a recipe for suicide. You really MUST have one of those...


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## estelle85 (Jan 22, 2008)

No friends but a partner....someone that can be there for me 24/7..hahaha


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

no partner is worse. your friends cant give you what a woman can


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## HumiliatedGuy (Jan 13, 2008)

This was a depressing thread. I have spent a lot of time and energy convincing myself that it's okay to not have a partner, and this has sent me back somewhat.


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

Well if you think it's ok for you, who's to say otherwise?


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## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

IllusionOfHappiness said:


> Probably having no friends. Relationships can be unpredictable, while frendships tend to last longer. Firends are there for you after breakups, etc.
> 
> Not that I would really know. Just my take on it.


I guess I agree...plus for some reason if you do lose a friend...it's usually a gradual thing & I guess not as hard as losing a partner because losing a partner is usually-- they're always there and then suddenly they're not there AT ALL anymore. So it hurts more losing a partner & most of them are not gonna last long at all...at least in my experience/for me.
Have lost plenty of friends too though. But my best friend...I doubt she'd ever completely abandon me, so that's at least good to know.


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## Snickersnack (Jun 21, 2008)

Friends. I've made it this far without a partner, what's difference will another 10-20 years make?

Besides, ideally, we can commiserate about not having girlfriends.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

Im better off alone and going to the gym or taking walks with my dog. for any little problem I might have its gym gym gym.


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## arkityp (Jun 14, 2008)

i don't know, i don't have either. just someone who understood me and loved me unconditionally would more than suffice.


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

Do you feel any better, Jordan?


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## arkityp (Jun 14, 2008)

srschirm said:


> Do you feel any better, Jordan?


i wish i could say i did. it's been a rough month... but thanks for asking!


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## Lonely Heart (May 26, 2008)

I'd rather have a partner but no friends.

Friend = emotional companionship :hug 

Boyfriend = emotional companionship + sex :cuddle


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## cydonia337 (Nov 11, 2003)

it's so weird because i was just thinking about this the other day. i would much rather have friends.... i couldn't imagine having anything better than a whole group of people who'll be there for you and support you and enjoy every part of life with you. with a group of friends you get so many different perspectives on life and so many different ways to learn from them and to just have fun. i've been in a really long relationship with a guy and it gets to be really one-sided and i'm done with that now. Being in love is amazing, but i don't think anything could replace true friendship.


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## foodie (Apr 27, 2010)

.


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## holyshilidin (Nov 5, 2010)

I am living proof of this. Had a partner she was my all. Had very little to no friends but that ok she said cause we were eachothers best friends she said. She also said I dont have to worry I'll always have her. Wrong. ONe day she leaves me now i have nothing choose friends


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## gopherinferno (Apr 7, 2009)

Having close friends is better. Couples can break up, but friends can be for life.


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## Mr. Frostie (Nov 2, 2008)

No friends is worse.


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## shynesshellasucks (May 10, 2008)

I guess it would be having no partner. I think the only reason I'm even looking for friends right now is for the fact that it might help me land a partner lol.


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## SilentOutcast (Oct 26, 2010)

I had some friends but they wanted to spend their time with their partners and families, leaving me with no friends no partner. At least when you are in a relationship at least then your are invited to hang out with other couples, otherwise it seems you get nothing.


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## facade (Oct 1, 2009)

No friends


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## christina85 (Nov 27, 2010)

*Re:*

I thought that partner because partner fulfill your requirement. If your partner not fulfill your wish then you leave him/her but with friends this is not possible. :clap


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## lanzman (Jun 14, 2004)

No partner is worse. If I had a partner she could be my friend, too.


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## FakeFur (Nov 4, 2009)

No friends


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## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

No friends.


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## anomalous (Jun 12, 2004)

Thought it would be interesting to tally the responses so far for everyone who lists their gender and gave a clear-cut answer to the question.

FEMALE: 2/15 (14%) value a partner more
MALE: 9/18 (50%) value a partner more

Just food for thought, possibly pertinent to the "who's more desperate?" thread.


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## low (Sep 27, 2009)

No partner I think, definately, yes. As you get older you drift away from friends anyway, it's how it is. They get their own partners, work (both you and them), you may get your own partner, you both mature and may form different attitudes/world views. Partners ideally become your best friend anyway.


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## sean88 (Apr 29, 2006)

Both suck, and maybe it's just the loneliness talking, but I'd say no partner.


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## SOME (Jul 13, 2009)

feels the same either way to me.


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## foe (Oct 10, 2010)

I'll say no partner is worse.

I've had friends....didn't really relate to any of them with exception to one.


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## bent (Aug 4, 2005)

Definitely having no partner is way thefk worse. You can have lots of friends but that essential need of intimacy is never fulfilled. Whereas with a partner you already have one friend who also fulfills other needs. And not having friends isn't nearly as dreary and painful as not having a partner. Of course, I assume partner means a relationship and not just mechanical sex.


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## freakitty (Dec 17, 2010)

No partner


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

SilentOutcast said:


> I had some friends but they wanted to spend their time with their partners and families, leaving me with no friends no partner. At least when you are in a relationship at least then your are invited to hang out with other couples, otherwise it seems you get nothing.


This ^

Although I found out that I have a lot to learn to get to a point where I could have a functioning relationship.


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## jennlynne5 (Aug 6, 2010)

My partner is my best friend so I don't care as much that I don't have any other friends. Before I met my husband I was just lonely & depressed all the time. So yeah, no partner would be much worse.


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## nemesis1 (Dec 21, 2009)

No partner for me.

All the friends ive ever had always seem to end up screwing me over so im not really bothered about finding any new ones anymore. But ive never had a serious relationship before and i certainly want that experience.


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## Onigiri (Aug 3, 2010)

No partner.

My partner is my best friend.


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