# DONT CARE ABOUT ANYONE



## sagotmee (Jan 25, 2007)

anyone just not care about anyone? (maybe bc nobody cares about me).
For instance, my sister is opening a cafe with her bf and I told her I'm happy for her and asked her what she's gonna name it. (I was pretending to care but honestly, I don't). It just sounds like the right thing to ask.

even on here I might read someone's story or problem I can't really give any advice bc I just don't genuinely care ya know? 

I find it extremely hard to have a conversation with someone because I just don't give a flying **** to hear about their life. It doesn't interest me, it seems like nothing interests me. Not even book characters. (I can pretend I care about the people I speak to but I'm really just worrying about how they're perceiving me, which means the conversation is just really bland).

(unrelated)
Has anyone heard of Alogia? Thought poverty? There's not much info on it online but I think I have it.


----------



## lonesomeboy (Aug 29, 2005)

yep i dont care about others, because noone cares about me.


----------



## Mazza (Oct 22, 2005)

I think a lot of people feel like this even if they don't admit it.


----------



## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

i work in an office and several people tell you their personal life. i really dont care about how crappy it is because i have to deal with my crappy life.


----------



## phob33 (Mar 31, 2007)

Maybe it's meds making you "emotionless"


----------



## sagotmee (Jan 25, 2007)

deleting all my posts. kthxbye.


----------



## kowabonga (Jun 10, 2006)

I guess i don't really care much about others either or I have trouble actually feeling any connection. Hard to tell why i'm like this but it's definately something that makes it more difficult to have a meaningful relationship and sometimes make me do or say something that hurt others.
As I see it there are two ways to relate to other people:
-On a emotionel level where you really care about someone and feel empathy with them - especially if it's someone close to you(i guess that's how a real friendship is). 
-On a intellectual level. On the intellectual level it is possible to "care" for people you don't even know. Because you know that they suffer just as you suffer and they want to be happy just as you want to be happy. You might not actually have to have any feelings for the other person.

Often we just do what we "feel like" but i think sometimes it can be healthy to try and cultivate our relationship to others. Like giving blood, or volunteering as you metion. Or maybe just in the daily activities. I think this might help so at some point actual feelings for other people arise.


----------



## PlayerOffGames (Mar 19, 2007)

*Re: re: DONT CARE ABOUT ANYONE*



sagotmee said:


> i'm a horrible person.


no...i know the feeling...but i dont think im a bad person because of it...its just the result of things we've went through...what do you mean by thought poverty?


----------



## Shauna (Jul 29, 2006)

I care about people and their feeling or whatnot...but people just don't care about me. So, that makes me kinda sad and introverted. People don't really care about losers like me. Only time they do is when they want something. I hope i don't become anti-social :sigh 

I've been invited out tonight with a friend of my from High School. Its suppose to be us and about 2 other girls. I told her i would go..so imma give it a try. I know i'm going to be the quiet outcast though.


----------



## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

I care about some people, but not most... or sometimes I care, but other times I don't.


----------



## ozkr (Dec 2, 2005)

I'm having similar problems when it comes to relating to other people or caring about them,but the thing I really hate is when I do things based on what I feel I'm expected to do in certain situations (because it would somehow make me look good) and not on what I feel about people. 
For example helping a kid who just fell down ,smiling when someone is telling you an anecdote , or paying close attention to what the a person is saying, are things that would seem appropriate but the reality I don't really care about the freaking kid being on the ground, the boring anecdote ,and expect that what the person is saying never comes up in any conversation ever again because I will not remember any of it.


----------



## SilentProphet (Jun 1, 2007)

I think SA numbed my ability to care as much as i want. It's hard to explain, but thats how i feel. Like most of you i really don't give a **** about how somebody elses day is going, like if a family member or friend calls, Or if somebody says how much they miss you, i don't feel the same way. Of course i lie through my teeth with the " oh i miss you two" But i really don't! fact is i could care less about seeing that person again. It's mean, and i feel terrible for it but it's true. I don't mean like death tho! i mean if i dont hear from somebody in a long time i wont make any attempt to contact them, and let them contact me.


----------



## Prodigal Son (Dec 11, 2005)

Are you emotionally numb? Like, can you watch a sad movie or TV show and feel nothing? Do you have pets? Could you watch one of your pets be road kill and feel nothing?


----------



## SilentProphet (Jun 1, 2007)

Who me? or the topic creator?


----------



## SilentProphet (Jun 1, 2007)

I'll answer anyway even if it wasn't meant for me, cause sometimes it takes a while to get any replies on this site, and i'm bored as hell.Plus you brought up some good questions. 

So if me, well i have a dog. I had two but the other one i had died. Had to put it asleep, i cried for a day or two cause i was used to having that dog around for years, but after that i was fine. Pets are different tho, Pets don't call me on the phone to annoy me :lol I don't cry when watching movies cause always know in the back of mind they are fake, and it's stupid to get emotionally involved in something like that. I still love movies tho! don't get me wrong. I had a frog in my throat after seeing breveheart for the first time. But yea, i feel like i'm "numb" to some extent.


----------



## march_hare (Jan 18, 2006)

That alogia thing is interesting... From the wikipedia description I definitely have this "poverty of speech".


----------



## Prodigal Son (Dec 11, 2005)

I don't even think I was asking anybody in particular.  I was asking out of curiosity. Different varieties of sensitivity/empathy and I don't believe anybody is completely numb.


----------



## scairy (Sep 18, 2005)

sagotmee said:


> anyone just not care about anyone? (maybe bc nobody cares about me).
> For instance, my sister is opening a cafe with her bf and I told her I'm happy for her and asked her what she's gonna name it. (I was pretending to care but honestly, I don't). It just sounds like the right thing to ask.
> 
> even on here I might read someone's story or problem I can't really give any advice bc I just don't genuinely give a [email protected]#$ ya know?
> ...


Well thanks for sharing. I seem to only care about a few people. I actually can think of family members that if they were gone tomorrow it wouldn't phase me. I think for me it's the lack of a social environment where you have a group of people that care about each other. Outside of my parents no one really cares about me. Almost feels like I'm losing the human element of emotion with time. Once that's gone I'd classify myself as a walking zombie.


----------



## scairy (Sep 18, 2005)

Prodigal Son said:


> I don't even think I was asking anybody in particular.  I was asking out of curiosity. Different varieties of sensitivity/empathy and I don't believe anybody is completely numb.


Oh I've become more numb as the years wear on. It actually scares me.


----------



## Nutnutnut (Jun 2, 2007)

Depression?
One of the consequences of depression is to have no more interest in anything at all.


----------



## leppardess (Nov 8, 2003)

Nutnutnut said:


> Depression?
> One of the consequences of depression is to have no more interest in anything at all.


For the most part, that's true. In my case, depression causes lack of interest in activities and more stressful socialization but I don't stop caring about the people that are close to me. If anything, those people keep me as sane as is humanly possible.

In general, I used to care about people in general (yes, in spite of being an anxious wreck most of the time, I do love people in general...), in the last 10 years or so, I only care about the people that are immediately in my life. I attribute that to emotional exhaustion. It just takes too much energy to be involved in more than a few people's lives at a time for me.


----------



## Perfectly~Flawed (Jun 13, 2005)

I used to be this way, not caring about anyone. 
I've changed over time and now I feel that I care too much.


----------



## sean88 (Apr 29, 2006)

I used to think that I didn't care about people, 'cause when people told me stuff like "Oh, my pet died," I could give a shyte, but if I made that same person feel bad by mistake, I would feel totally bad because I hurt them. So I think there's different levels of caring, and I think as a general consensus most people don't care about other's trivial issues, because we all have our own stuff on our minds to worry about.


----------



## down123 (Jun 22, 2005)

I UNDERSTAND.....years ago i had no interest in anyone or anything unless it revolved around dealing with my inner issues. even if someone wanted to talk to me about what was going on with me, i didnt know how to communicate properly and was too embarassed to discuss my issues as well. i would also become irritable and not say my total feelings or thoughts.

i think the reason why we dont care about anyone or anything is because we are so preoccupied with whats going on within us, in our minds. we have things we need to resolve or come to terms with before we can focus on other things or ppl. were just too distracted and irritated by our feelings.

our thoughts are what is distracting us from communicating properly. 

right now i try real real hard to push my thoughts aside and to focus on the other person. i think its for the best. im learning from them and am feeling more confident with myself. its hard though. 

it will take time to get to this point though but it is possible. it takes commitment and perserverance and a positive attitude, but trust me it will pay off in the end. 

i think you have to feel comfortable with yourself and your life before you can start to feel comfortable around others.


----------



## nothing_to_say (Nov 21, 2006)

I only care about a few members of my family, and even then I only see two of them reguarly. Other people I just don't care about. 

Probably the main reason I can't do penpal stuff, or emails


----------



## quat (Sep 27, 2006)

sagotmee said:


> anyone just not care about anyone? (maybe bc nobody cares about me).
> For instance, my sister is opening a cafe with her bf and I told her I'm happy for her and asked her what she's gonna name it. (I was pretending to care but honestly, I don't). It just sounds like the right thing to ask.
> 
> even on here I might read someone's story or problem I can't really give any advice bc I just don't genuinely care ya know?
> ...


I get like that a lot, my sister told me she was pregnant, I know I should have been happy, I know I should say something good. So I give the expected reaction and say the expected thing when I'm not thinking or feeling either. My mate calls me on the phone, starts crying, that's how bad things were getting, I didn't feel anything, gave the expected reaction.


----------



## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

Me either. I just can't pretend to care while I don't. I really only care about myself. If that makes me selfish then so be it.


----------



## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

I have a hard time caring about anyone else.


----------



## SpesVitae (Oct 20, 2005)

*Re: re: DONT CARE ABOUT ANYONE*



down123 said:


> I UNDERSTAND.....years ago i had no interest in anyone or anything unless it revolved around dealing with my inner issues. even if someone wanted to talk to me about what was going on with me, i didnt know how to communicate properly and was too embarassed to discuss my issues as well. i would also become irritable and not say my total feelings or thoughts.
> 
> i think the reason why we dont care about anyone or anything is because we are so preoccupied with whats going on within us, in our minds. we have things we need to resolve or come to terms with before we can focus on other things or ppl. were just too distracted and irritated by our feelings.
> 
> ...


 :agree Nice response. I also think that though it may be difficult to offer compassion to another especially when you have your own problems, it is not only still very possible to do so, but also a wonderful way to catalyze your own healing because of it.

Often I find myself being too caring, perhaps to the point of being annoyingly smothering. At that point, my inclination is to withdraw significantly, but I try hard to remain a potential outlet for when someone may wish to reach out again. Other times I've just become so burned out that I prefer to be completely reactive and receptive to others' outcry rather than proactive. In the back of my mind I also yearn for someone to do the same for me as well.


----------



## VCL XI (Jan 19, 2004)

I realized I was completely cold to everyone this week when my brother woke me up with his arm in a sling and told that he and his friend got in a serious car accident as a result of a drunk driver. He could have easily been killed and yet while he told me the details of his head crashing through the window, and so on, I was more focused on checking my email for the day. I couldn't care less about anything as long as I'm not affected. Even when I hurt people accidentally and apologize for it, I'm never actually sorry and I even feel a little pleasure from it. I'm pretty much everything I hate about other people.


----------



## kriminator (Jul 6, 2007)

sagotmee said:


> anyone just not care about anyone? (maybe bc nobody cares about me).
> For instance, my sister is opening a cafe with her bf and I told her I'm happy for her and asked her what she's gonna name it. (I was pretending to care but honestly, I don't). It just sounds like the right thing to ask.
> 
> even on here I might read someone's story or problem I can't really give any advice bc I just don't genuinely care ya know?
> ...


It is a way of coping with anxiety/depression, it happens to a lot of people
Apathy about people and personal issues (money/property/health)

And people only care only about themselves and their close families/friends on an evolutionary basis. If you cared for everyone indiscriminately you couldn't function.
Don't think you are cold or a heartless *******, you probably just don't pretend to care like most people


----------



## Greentops (Jan 18, 2013)

I can identify with this. Although I'm much more alone due to my non-caring attitude, not having to hear other people ***** and moan about nothing is well worth it.


----------



## macrotus (Aug 31, 2014)

Probably depression.


----------



## KrystinaDanielle (Feb 18, 2015)

I don't care about the majority of people. Even if I try to care... however there are a few that get through the barrier and those I care about IMMENSELY! 

... I also care about animals and my students way to much...but coworkers, family members, ect... I can't even make myself pretend to care. I'm just cold. 

I wouldn't say it is because they don't care about me... a lot of them seem to care... I just don't feel an interest in their lives. I don't wish harm on them... I'm just indifferent to seeing/knowing about their world.


----------

