# Depression?



## Sourgirl25 (Mar 25, 2013)

What are Sign and symptoms of depression? What personally, are your symptoms and experience with depression?


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## Soulessheart49 (Nov 28, 2012)

I've battled depression for as long as I can remember, since I was 6 years old I believe. Although, I was diagnosed with it when I was 14. My symptoms are:

1) I see no point in getting out of bed in the morning, or I physically can't get out of bed because I feel like my body is being weighed down by a trillion weights.

2) I'll sleep throughout an entire day and I'll still be able to sleep during the night.

3) I avoid people more then usual.

4) I say less

5) I fake smile A LOT more 

6) My eyes water up more often from feeling like I want to cry

7) I cry whenever I find the time and privacy to do so to release the rage

8) I don't feel hungry and I eat less or even if I feel hungry I don't have the energy to eat

9) I sometimes can go days without showering simply because I stop caring about taking care of myself

10) I deny the love from my family, close friends and boyfriend

11) I get paranoid more often then usual

12) I stop looking both ways when I cross the street because I no longer fear dying

13) Even what I have a passion for (music playing piano and singing) can't even make me happy 

14) I fake responses to avoid explanation of why I'm upset I say "Yeah I'm fine just stressed" or "Yeah I'm just tired I'll get over it"

15) I feel guilty about everything

The list goes on


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## Sourgirl25 (Mar 25, 2013)

Soulessheart49 said:


> I've battled depression for as long as I can remember, since I was 6 years old I believe. Although, I was diagnosed with it when I was 14. My symptoms are:
> 
> 1) I see no point in getting out of bed in the morning, or I physically can't get out of bed because I feel like my body is being weighed down by a trillion weights.
> 
> ...


Wow! Thank you for sharing your experience with depression. Best of luck.


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## Eazi (Mar 27, 2013)

I just think that there's no point of anything.


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## march_hare (Jan 18, 2006)

Yes to all of the above. Also,
When doing enjoyable things feeling guilty that I am not enjoying it enough or not at all, and that soon it will be over anyway.
Looking back at enjoyable times I have had in the past and feeling sad that it is past rather than being happy it happened.
Not feeling that enjoyable experiences in my life are "genuine" or anything good in my life is valuable or that I deserve it.
Not seeing the point in making an effort to do things to improve myself as it seems futile and it does not create instant relief ( which is of course a totally unrealistic expectation )


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## matthewebbert (Apr 5, 2013)

I have experience some things like Difficulty in concentrating, remembering details, making decisions and all..


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## Beetleguise (May 30, 2013)

1) Severe fatigue and lethargy. Inability to wake up
2) No enthusiasm to do ANYTHING 
3) Suicidal thoughts


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## Beetleguise (May 30, 2013)

4) Shutting people out


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## Gizamalukeix (Sep 16, 2012)

Soulessheart49 said:


> I've battled depression for as long as I can remember, since I was 6 years old I believe. Although, I was diagnosed with it when I was 14. My symptoms are:
> 
> 1) I see no point in getting out of bed in the morning, or I physically can't get out of bed because I feel like my body is being weighed down by a trillion weights.
> 
> ...


I do number 12 for the same reason 

Some of my symptoms are sleeping a lot, hopelessness, rage and loss of interest in everything.


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## Sourgirl25 (Mar 25, 2013)

Beetleguise said:


> 4) Shutting people out


Do u shut out all people or just the people You are closest too? Why?


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## nila11 (Jun 3, 2013)

Depression was mostly described as feeling sad, blue, unhappy, miserable, or down in the dumps. Most of us consider this way at one time or another for short periods. True experimental depression is an illness. It was a mood disorder in which felled of sadness, loss, anger, or frustrations interfere with daily life for weeks or longer.


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## Dat Gyul (Jul 6, 2012)

Soulessheart49 said:


> I've battled depression for as long as I can remember, since I was 6 years old I believe. Although, I was diagnosed with it when I was 14. My symptoms are:
> 
> 1) I see no point in getting out of bed in the morning, or I physically can't get out of bed because I feel like my body is being weighed down by a trillion weights.
> 
> ...


This except I don't fake smile, I see no point in smiling period, I've had depression problems since I was in my teens probably longer.


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## xgodmetashogun (Apr 2, 2013)

I must be extremely depressed then :/ Time for elevation


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## LookingGlassAlice (Oct 17, 2013)

To me depression doesn't have to be sadness sometimes I just don't feel anything. Even if I'm not so depressed that I'm crying all the time or don't want to get out of bed I still am not happy. I don't get excited about anything, mostly I don't have positive emotions and my "normal" is still to be very low mood.
Personally I seem to have cycles where I go through periods where I feel horrible and like I'm in a black pit (I think that's the "major depression") then when I'm not having one of those periods I still feel crummy and low (basically like im extremely jaded about everything even though I don't want to be) which I think is the dysthymia. I'm not actually totally sure though since I only was diagnosed recently even though I've been going through this most of my life.


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## cyanide444 (Oct 20, 2013)

It's very subtle for me at first, it kind of goes in stages. 

First:

1) Marked decrease in my capacity to feel pleasure

2) Irritability

3) Tendency to space out a lot, as though everything seems like a dream

4) Aching joints and muscles

Then:

1) I stop caring whether I live or die

2) I'm a lot more sensitive to sound

3) Infinite spirals of self-loathing/negative thoughts

4) Rationalization of dying/suicide

5) Near complete loss of motivation

6) Irregular eating patterns (surges in hunger followed by periods of not wanting to eat at all)

7) Long periods of "numbness"

8) Extreme withdrawal (I'm already kind of isolated)

Final:

1) The "numbness" escalates to the point that I often feel dead (as though I'm a corpse)

2) Periods of negative thoughts get longer and more intense

3) Suicidal ideation, actively planning suicide, obsessing over videos of death and suicide methods -- I always tried to make my methods perfect.

4) I begin to disgust myself

5) Might begin to engage in self-destructive behaviors

6) Every time a bus passes by, or a train, or anything dangerous, I imagine throwing myself in the middle and dying; same applies for heights.

If it gets really bad:

1) I swing from periods of deep, obsessive suicidal ideation to fits of mass homicidal ideation

2) I start to plan both of these more and more obsessively

3) I have extended fantasies of either committing suicide or killing a lot of people

4) I begin to lose my grounding in reality, and I'm convinced that all of my plans are rational


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

I get sad, lonely, and see no point of life.


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## PersonPersoning (Oct 5, 2013)

everything becomes pointless
nothing brings pleasure 
people become annoying as hell
looks and hygiene dont matter
strong desire not to have to wake up in the morning
waking up, and being pissed off that youre still here
lol its not fun.


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## derpresion (May 17, 2012)

i believe i have had luck to experience everything that depresion can offer


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## Pike Queen (Oct 16, 2013)

I've struggled with depression since middle school. Sorry if these have already been stated, but here are my personal symptoms:

It generally starts off with me realizing how lonely I am. I start thinking about how everyone has friends and has been in relationships, and how no one will ever want to be with me. I also think about how everyone else is better than me; more talented, more valuable, better looking, etc. I end up feeling worthless and ultimately try to think of ways to terminate myself without suffering any physical pain. I also shut down and don't talk to anyone, and cry for hours. Luckily, it typically goes away before I ever actually do anything.


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## redblurr (Oct 26, 2013)

Emptiness. There's no point in living in this world if I can't find my purpose of living. It's really hard to get a sense of purpose if all i think is negative thoughts due to depression.


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## TunesJelly5 (Oct 28, 2013)

*Hello*

I really don't know why I signed up for this thing. I guess its because I don't really have anyone else to talk to besides my family whom Id really rather not go to for this kind of problem. Not because they wont help me, but because they cant do anything about it and they have enough to worry about themselves. Im 19 years old. Female, living in Washington. Ive moved around my WHOLE life. Why, because when my mother married my stepfather he joined the military. She decided she wanted to be wherever he switched army bases. So there we were.. There I was always the new girl in town. That includes Texas, California and a few more cities near by Seattle. Oh and the schools sucked. Always getting bullied on, oh yeah and they were always boys! The girls just said mean things lol. I went to kamiakin high school for about 2 years, that's the longest I've ever stayed at a high school. There were people that really wanted to get to know me but I had major social problems. I didn't speak. Not one word. Then I ignored those people and made friends with chics that didn't give one **** about me and thought I was really weird. I was afraid to be myself and show who I really was. I even lied about my virginity. So after finishing 9th and 10th grade there, I went to pasco high another school here in the Tri cities where I currently live. There is where I really got ****ed because I was still lying about my innocence. I thought it was "uncool" to be a virgin. So then, I finally got ****ed with a guy I gave my heart to and to this day don't really know if he had feelings for me at all. We were together for 6 months. Much longer than I actually wanted to be with the guy. He was.. a real douche. Got called a *****, ***** and all that good stuff. He wouldn't let me break up with him or else he would snitch to my family that I smoked weed and he ****ed me in their house. But then finally one day, it was just one goodbye and I've never seen him since. Moved here in Richland for the last time. Graduated at that high school, which I was only going to for less than a year. School sucked, totally prepped out and no chics talked to me. And so now here I am, working 2 part time jobs trying to save up for college. Hoping.. just hoping that I make a real girlfriend someday. Id love to chat with anyone. So reply ****ers


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## TunesJelly5 (Oct 28, 2013)

*Hi again*

I love silversun pickups, stone temple pilots, band of skulls, talking heads etc hahahah


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## inerameia (Jan 26, 2012)

I've generally experienced low mood with anxiety and irritability. When it's really bad I have anhedonia, feel empty, emotionless, zombie-like and reality seems like a hazy dream. It can be pretty intense and I feel like I'm losing it, going insane. I think of how I would die also because my life seems so meaningless and hopeless.


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## Zack (Apr 20, 2013)

onewaytoparadise said:


> "Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest" (Qur'an: 13:28)
> 
> Take a look in the creator's last testament to mankind where I'm sure you'll find the answers to your questions.
> A book without changes for over 1400 years.
> Hope you find this useful. May God Almighty guide you.


I think you want the spirituality forum.


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## LauraInTheSky (Aug 17, 2013)

A deep, lingering agonizing emotional pain that reaches the physical as well.

My depression and mood issues actually trouble me more than sa or anxiety in general. But I find this website helpful for both.


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## Perfection Wont Do (Mar 23, 2013)

cyanide444 said:


> It's very subtle for me at first, it kind of goes in stages.
> 
> First:
> 
> ...


That's dark man. I hope you're doing okay now.


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## EccentricCat (Dec 8, 2013)

Sourgirl25 said:


> What are Sign and symptoms of depression? What personally, are your symptoms and experience with depression?


Loss of appetite.

I don't want to do anything but sleep all day, and then I can't sleep at night so I either stay up or take a sleeping pill.

I feel numb, empty, and detached.

I also feel very suicidal, so much to the point that even those who matter to me wouldn't be able to convince me to stay my hand.


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## SunshineSam218 (Dec 6, 2013)

~Isolation
~I barely eat
~Self worthless
~Always tired
~Anxious
~Fear
~Self Pitying
~Crying spells
~Suicidal thoughts: This happens when I'm at my lowest.
~Nightmares/Trouble Sleeping
~Racing Thoughts
~Paranoid
~Feeling dead inside
~Worthlessness
~Very Lazy, to the point where I won't get out of bed.

I'm sure there's a lot more but these are the ones that are Top for me. And I suffer with Bi Polar disorder.


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## monotonous (Feb 1, 2013)

yeah im very depressed


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

Not sleeping
Worse anxiety
Feeling of deep, dark hopelessness, and despair.
Ignoring people
Zero motivation to do anything. It's actually painful to do the simplest tasks.
Can't focus on anything.
Don't eat much
Derealization
Suicidal thoughts


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

Bored, sad, no motivations, wanting to die, feels life suck, worthless, ashamed.


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## Melissa42 (Dec 19, 2013)

BlueWeepingRose said:


> ~Isolation
> ~I barely eat
> ~Self worthless
> ~Always tired
> ...


I don't suffer from bi-polar but rose couldn't have said it any better for my symptoms of depression. I also think that the meds that I was put on since my diagnosis have led me to be more socially anxious and want to be more isolated. I think it's making me worse?! Is this even possible?


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## Amandus (Nov 23, 2013)

I had moderate depression for a couple of years until it ended in early 2013. I felt a strange emptiness and uselessness about myself, and thought that nobody cared about me, my SA ruined my life, etc.


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## Lish3rs (May 5, 2013)

Along with all of those you might have confusion with the racing thoughts.

Usually, if I'm feeling miserable I might not be able to concentrate or be productive.


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## Awkto Awktavious (May 11, 2011)

Daydreamer_Sam said:


> ~Isolation
> ~I barely eat
> ~Self worthless
> ~Always tired
> ...


Yeah, I'm going through all these right now. Its been going on and off again for over a year. 
I'm sure everyone thinks "that's just how he is".


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## Justmeandmyguitar (Nov 24, 2013)

Push People away, pessimistic, eat more than usual (junk), don't care about anything, reckless behaviour, hate myself due to what SA has taken from me, can't sleep despite feeling exhausted all day, dwell on negative experiences that are in the past, suicidal thoughts, give up on all my hobbies, impulsiveness, feel kind of emotionless. I'm going through it now, and it ____ing sucks!

The weirdest part is my SA isn't half as bad when I'm depressed because I just don't care about anything or worry about people judging me.


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## licorice (Oct 5, 2013)

My biggest issue was motivation to do any of the things that would make me feel better, including getting out of bed or completing work. I think Hyperbole and a Half put it best...



> But trying to use willpower to overcome the apathetic sort of sadness that accompanies depression is like a person with no arms trying to punch themselves until their hands grow back.


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## jhwelch (Jan 14, 2014)

cyanide444 said:


> It's very subtle for me at first, it kind of goes in stages.
> 
> First:
> 
> ...


Exactly how it is for me, especially 7.


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## explorink (Jan 18, 2014)

I have depression and I'd say it's linked directly to my social anxiety. When I'm feeling less anxious, I feel very happy and not depressed at all. Doorways open for me, only to be shut in my face when the anxiety comes again. Here are some of my symptoms:

- Very irritable. I'm so so so irritable. Cannot even explain how much. I get annoyed at every single thing, verging on misophonia.
- Sarcastic. Can't reply seriously, don't know if people are serious or not so I reply in sarcasm. 
- Fatigue. I'm completely exhausted -- mentally and physically drained. 
- Insomnia. 
- Loss of will to live. Don't care if I live or die. When I'm walking alone down the street and I think someone's after me, I honestly don't care. When I'm crossing the street and a car comes I don't look. When I think someone's going to harm me I know I'd just stand there. I don't care whether someone kills me, as long as the finish the job.
- Anger. I'm beyond livid with the ***** that triggered this problem. Every day I swear to myself I will hunt her down for ruining a small child's life, leaving it with the mental scar that will last forever.
- Good things seem like they won't last or aren't there.
- No hope for the future.

Honestly the only reason I'm still here is because of my one hobby that I love and that tiny hope I have that I will get out of here and fulfill my dream. As soon as those two things are gone, I will not live.


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## paradoxicalpandora (Aug 20, 2013)

-Feeling useless/worthless/hopeless/unwanted
-Paranoia
-Psychotic episodes
-Sleep for days/can't sleep for days
-Self destructive behavior
-Aches and pains
-Suicidal thoughts, plans and ideas
-Shorter tempered
-Can't get out of bed
-Lethargic
-Uncontrollable thoughts
-Unmotivated
-Increased anxiety
-Uncontrollable crying
-If not crying, blank, "gone" emotions
-Obsessive thoughts increase


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## thrilla in manila (Jan 31, 2014)

A constant pall over my life, whether experiences are good or bad. A constant telling of myself that whatever fleeting moments of happiness I get in my life are just that...fleeting, and not the answer to my issues.


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## Belle85 (Feb 8, 2014)

I don't think I have clinical depression, I may be wrong but my mum has clinical depression and has to go on prozac whereas I do not need to take anything, well not yet anyways.
My anxiety and fear of failure makes me depressed.

I feel tired all the time, I avoid doing things (coursework and other important things), my room has been messy for years, I become more lazy, I go more into myself and feel paranoid. My chest is sore, I comfort eat, I cannot be bothered to go to bed because I do not want to face the next day, or I sleep early because what is the point in staying awake. I sleep more because what is the point in getting up early and dreaming is more interesting than my life. I blank things out, I feel suffocated, I want to quit things, I feel like just laying on the floor and not getting up. I avoid going to work and freak out about having to deal with customers at work. I avoid social situations because people will ask me ' how are you', 'what are you up to now' and I just want to be left alone.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

Joint pain, back pain, chronic fatigue, no energy, low energy, mania, appetite changes, sleep disturbances, insomnia, anxiety, breathing disorder, emotionally depleted, spiritually defeated, spiritually liberated, feelings of excessive guilt, worthlessness, helplessness, black and white thinking, personalizing, ocd, persistent sadness..


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## MetalPearls (Jan 26, 2014)

My symptoms are.. me. Diagnosed with severe depression since I was 17. I am 25 now.. name it been through it or am in it. LIFE RULESSSS  (super sarcasm, shotgun sitting in my lap) lol


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## Gwendolyn75 (Mar 18, 2014)

I have a question about the symptoms and signs of anxiety. I have a feeling that I may have some sort of anxiety that is effecting my work. But I look at the symptoms and they don't really match...
I don't get the racing heart, tightening of chest, hot/cold flushes etc. Unless I have to stand up in front of people and do a presentation, or introduce myself. Which I know many people experience!
However, I don't feel this way generally, although there are a lot of other things that I worry about doing (especially at work) such as taking phone calls if I'm not 100% sure of the information I am imparting or speaking to customers in front of my colleagues.
I seem to have a blank mind when it comes to trying to communicate. I can't recall things and even if I can, I struggle with my wording. Then I feel useless, embarrassed and ridiculous. I spent a whole 2 days at a training course contributing nothing to discussion, other than a few suggestions here and there in our group activities. But there was no way I could confidently present our findings. I haven't always been this way, but it's seemed to have gotten steadily worse for me in adulthood and now I'm in a job where it's imperative to have great communication skills and contribute. And I'd like to.
In team meetings I barely say anything. If we have a group discussion about something and I do speak up, I feel that I'm being cut off. It's bizarre actually because I could always chime in after getting disrupted but I lose the confidence. I'm pretty sure that my mind is exaggerating these feelings.
I get along really well with my work mates, I'm pretty easy-going at work and am always finding something to laugh about. Work is actually a very nice environment, but that sinking feeling is always close by.
I avoid doing certain tasks at work because I'm worried that I'll stuff it up. I put it off until I'm alone or I absolutely cannot procrastinate any longer. I'm surprised no one has picked up on this or at least no one has mentioned anything.
I want to be good at my job and it really frustrates me that I do this. Unfortunately, I've been doing it for as long as I started at this job - about a year and I haven't really seen much improvement in myself. Apparently I'm really good at avoidance. 
I do have snowballing worries - I am always over thinking. I'm starting to also over think in social situations.
I do have moments of restlessness - I pace sometimes when I'm alone with these thoughts. I'm becoming irritable with things that wouldn't normally irritate me.
It's come close to the point where I could call in sick and I feel like doing so, but I just force myself to go in. Usually it's ok. Nothing bad happens. No one outs me as a fraud. But I'm waiting for it. Even these feelings seem ridiculous because I have this great opportunity to really do something I love doing. I'm so, so lucky to have this job. I'm worried that one day I'll give it away for no good reason except for this confidence issue.
I've stuck my head in the sand for so long and now it seems to have all come to a head. Now I'm angry at myself for letting it get this far.
I'm not sure if this is even anxiety or just a general self-esteem issue that needs ironing out? Would very much appreciate any input or suggestions. Thank you.


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## MPichardo (Jul 19, 2014)

I get very quiet, isolated and get easily irritated.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

Ah depression. Well i get sad, lonely, unmotivated and think negatively.


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## The Radiant Hero (Jul 20, 2014)

Crying on my bed, getting irritated at things easily, go into mood swings, feel like nobody cares about you...stuff like that


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## Thedood (Nov 27, 2013)

Isolate myself
Stay in bed all day
Have no motivation to do anything
Negative thoughts
Headache
Foggyness
Not find joy in anything
Binge on "comfort foods"


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## cryptoboy (Jul 30, 2014)

I have experienced severe beating after that I fell into depression. Symptoms were stopping feeding, closed in himself, crying, poor hygiene, fear.

I have undergone therapy and got better, but the fight was large and long. Today I work as a psychologist and write articles on the topic. You can see more of negative stress and depression in my website *here*.


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## The Exodus (Jul 31, 2014)

I don't think I have as strict emotions as most people do, though I think that I may suffer from bipolar, because of my mood swings. However, this may just be a phase, since I'm not quite out of my teenage years just yet. 

I mostly suffer from feeling tired, sleep deprivation, oversleeping, being incredibly sensitive to overwhelming sadness (thoughts of death or dying within my family, hopelessness, loneliness, will provoke crying), apathy / indifference (although I feel this may not be a term of depression), extreme empathy (a little contradictory, I know, but I'm a weird guy), and general lack of self worth. I also suspect I may have skewed perceptions on my own visual appearance, and I'm generally concerned with my weight quite a lot, even though people usually tell me I look fine (although I'm positive I'm at least a little overweight, so...). 

There are probably others, as well, but these are the symptoms I mostly suffer from. Bearing in mind they are not constant.


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## Whacky James (Jun 19, 2014)

Soulessheart49 said:


> I've battled depression for as long as I can remember, since I was 6 years old I believe. Although, I was diagnosed with it when I was 14. My symptoms are:
> 
> 1) I see no point in getting out of bed in the morning, or I physically can't get out of bed because I feel like my body is being weighed down by a trillion weights.
> 
> ...


WoW!!! u have said everything all suffers. YOu have descibed the things so briefly that now i don't have to say anything.


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## stuartkneen (Jul 9, 2014)

My sister went through depression, which was the most horrifying phase of her life. She dint sleep for hours at night, dint talk to anyone in the family.She had stopped mingling with friends.She dint go out for days together.Also she was least intrested to get involve in any activities.She just sat simply doing nothing at home.


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## hoodedstranger (Sep 26, 2014)

hope gone 
joy gone
everything seems like a hassle battle or your lugging around a heavy rock
lost emotion
worthlessness
loss of enthusiam which ppl mistake as laziness
grim outlook - everything is temporary happiness is truly fleeting
appetite changes
loneliness even amongst company
lots of zoning out
can sleep for hours
doubt
u hate even ur family n friends, dont wanna talk
whats the point attitude
contemplating sucide too much and in too much detail
emptiness
feeling your dreams are dead or you will never achieve them and your best years have past. 
no matter on a good day or so so day theres always an undercurrent of sadness tiredness and blankness


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## Kpanther (Oct 7, 2014)

I'm very sorry to say this but it doesn't get better. I've be depressed for as long as I can remember. I was medically diagnosed when I was 18 and back than depression was a very taboo subject. I'm 40 now and still waiting for it to get better. Everyday is a struggle and my fear is that one day I won't have the strength to continue. I know everyone on here feels that because from reading the posts you have all nailed it on the head on how it feels to be depressed. I never realized that there were so many out there that can understand how it feels. so I should take that back what I said about it never getting better because I just realized that me stumbling upon this web site just maybe the thing that helps me. I've always just told the doctors what they wanted to hear so I didn't have to deal with the way that you think they are judging you. Its been frowned upon for so long about talking openly about depression that I've never spoken about it. I'm new to this site and it was very difficult for me to make that first post the other day. But I can't seem to stop this is the 3rd one I've done and its liberating (only way to describe it). I have a tiny bit of hope now. Something I haven't had in a long time. I was going to delete that first line of my post but I thought nope I'm gonna just be as honest as I can on here and maybe that's exactly what I need. or its just gonna make me feel foolish and I never comeback to this site again. because even in cyber space I feel like I've made a fool out of my self. We'll see how I feel tomorrow. thanks to everyone who took the time to read my ramblings.


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## Frostbite (May 14, 2013)

Kpanther said:


> I'm very sorry to say this but it doesn't get better. I've be depressed for as long as I can remember. I was medically diagnosed when I was 18 and back than depression was a very taboo subject. I'm 40 now and still waiting for it to get better. Everyday is a struggle and my fear is that one day I won't have the strength to continue. I know everyone on here feels that because from reading the posts you have all nailed it on the head on how it feels to be depressed. I never realized that there were so many out there that can understand how it feels. so I should take that back what I said about it never getting better because I just realized that me stumbling upon this web site just maybe the thing that helps me. I've always just told the doctors what they wanted to hear so I didn't have to deal with the way that you think they are judging you. Its been frowned upon for so long about talking openly about depression that I've never spoken about it. I'm new to this site and it was very difficult for me to make that first post the other day. But I can't seem to stop this is the 3rd one I've done and its liberating (only way to describe it). I have a tiny bit of hope now. Something I haven't had in a long time. I was going to delete that first line of my post but I thought nope I'm gonna just be as honest as I can on here and maybe that's exactly what I need. or its just gonna make me feel foolish and I never comeback to this site again. because even in cyber space I feel like I've made a fool out of my self. We'll see how I feel tomorrow. thanks to everyone who took the time to read my ramblings.


I'm glad you're able to express yourself. Everyone here has a lot of issues, you should feel comfortable.


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## Who Loves You (Oct 7, 2014)

I think there is a way to feel better; but I just can't seem to lift the fog.


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## SGI (Nov 22, 2012)

Kpanther said:


> I'm very sorry to say this but it doesn't get better. I've be depressed for as long as I can remember. I was medically diagnosed when I was 18 and back than depression was a very taboo subject. I'm 40 now and still waiting for it to get better. Everyday is a struggle and my fear is that one day I won't have the strength to continue. I know everyone on here feels that because from reading the posts you have all nailed it on the head on how it feels to be depressed. I never realized that there were so many out there that can understand how it feels. so I should take that back what I said about it never getting better because I just realized that me stumbling upon this web site just maybe the thing that helps me. I've always just told the doctors what they wanted to hear so I didn't have to deal with the way that you think they are judging you. Its been frowned upon for so long about talking openly about depression that I've never spoken about it. I'm new to this site and it was very difficult for me to make that first post the other day. But I can't seem to stop this is the 3rd one I've done and its liberating (only way to describe it). I have a tiny bit of hope now. Something I haven't had in a long time. I was going to delete that first line of my post but I thought nope I'm gonna just be as honest as I can on here and maybe that's exactly what I need. or its just gonna make me feel foolish and I never comeback to this site again. because even in cyber space I feel like I've made a fool out of my self. We'll see how I feel tomorrow. thanks to everyone who took the time to read my ramblings.


 Hi! I'm glad you found this place  have you ever been to counselling? I would recommend it to everyone, they can get to the bottom of many troubles you have and set about conquering them.

Don't give up. There are many more people than you think in your situation and it can get better. Just give yourself the best chance in doing so and consult people about it.


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## nataliej (Sep 23, 2013)

My symptoms are negative thoughts/ thoughts of suicide, isolating myself, avoiding light places, self harm/cutting, lethargy, irritability/emotionally sensitive, always feeling tired, avoiding people, a feeling of detachment from everything, bad headaches, and a few others that people have already mentioned. More than anything though, it's just this deep desire to be alone and die.


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## Marilynn (Nov 6, 2013)

*Anticipatory anxiety*



Gwendolyn75 said:


> I have a question about the symptoms and signs of anxiety. I have a feeling that I may have some sort of anxiety that is effecting my work. But I look at the symptoms and they don't really match...
> I don't get the racing heart, tightening of chest, hot/cold flushes etc. Unless I have to stand up in front of people and do a presentation, or introduce myself. Which I know many people experience!
> However, I don't feel this way generally, although there are a lot of other things that I worry about doing (especially at work) such as taking phone calls if I'm not 100% sure of the information I am imparting or speaking to customers in front of my colleagues.
> I seem to have a blank mind when it comes to trying to communicate. I can't recall things and even if I can, I struggle with my wording. Then I feel useless, embarrassed and ridiculous. I spent a whole 2 days at a training course contributing nothing to discussion, other than a few suggestions here and there in our group activities. But there was no way I could confidently present our findings. I haven't always been this way, but it's seemed to have gotten steadily worse for me in adulthood and now I'm in a job where it's imperative to have great communication skills and contribute. And I'd like to.
> ...


It sounds like anticipatory anxiety. It's absolutely debilitating!! That's one of my issues.


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## Akuba (Oct 17, 2014)

I have moderate depression. Tried counseling, no use. All she told me was to see a family doctor. Awful advice!

Anyways, here are my signs:

-Withdrawal from social situations
-Weight gain
-Constipation
-Loss of hope
-Itching attacks
-Loss of interest in stuff I previously enjoyed (Syphon Filter games for instance)
-Insomnia


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## borntodie19 (Oct 29, 2014)

my symptoms are eating more than usual, get more sleep than normal, sensitivity to rejection, avoid social situations and lack of motivation, I think I have atypical depression


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## Missing Link (Jan 20, 2014)

When it was really bad, it used to be:
1. Lethargy and lack of motivation
2. No clear goals
3. Overeating / weight gain
4. Scattered thoughts
5. Social avoidance/anxiety
6. Suicidal thoughts

Now 
1. Scattered thoughts and lethargy
2. Anxiety; fear that a "tunnel" is collapsing and I might not make it out in time
3. Some social anxiety


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## ChubbyWeirdo (Aug 4, 2014)

Pretty much everything that has already been mentioned. Finding it almost impossible to roll out of bed in the morning, a constant nihilistic state of mind, not valuing life, chronic fatigue and laziness, procrastination, loneliness, etc.


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## 84929 (May 10, 2012)

Anxiety and depression kind of go hand in hand, I would think.

I have both. Depression cause I have anxiety. I would like to be normal. Where I can just get up and go. But that's not always the case.

I can have good days were I'm ok. Not one single panic attack. And then randomly have one. And it sucks cause it feels your at the top of the mountain and then fall back down again. You have to work yourself back up again. Its a real pain in the ***.

Sometimes I find myself depressed cause I worry about things. Some are really unrealistic. Even though I tell myself this. It doesn't make the repetitive thoughts go away. And it makes me depressed. I feel so lonely. Even though I have a boyfriend. But its hard cause he doesn't understand what its like. He gets annoyed cause he doesn't know how to help and maybe also the fact that he still believes that mental illness can be like switched off. In fact he even said when he was annoyed he said he was annoyed with me cause I don't do anything to make myself not sad. But that's actually the way of thinking for most people. They figure its mental illness. Therefore its all in your head and you are in control of it so just stop doing that to yourself and you'll be okay. 

I remember seeing this awesome comic and it depicted how mental illness is handle. The cartoon had people with physical illness with responses that are usually given to people who are suffering from mental illness. Like example a guy has his hand cut off and the other guy says "maybe if you don't think about it. It won't bother you." Really that's how people with depression are treated.


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## senzejlol (Dec 8, 2014)

My depression has been combined with past experiences, insomnia, stress and lack of drive. These being major factors, i guess the general teenage depression has had an affect. Im a very emotional person, but i keep everything inside and burst out on a random moment. Usually outed with anger


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## Zyriel (May 20, 2011)

I think people may suffer from different symptoms depending on the cause of the depression. For some it's chemical imbalance which can be sorta "fixed" through medication. For others, it's an overall sadness about events, experiences, past or current circumstances in their life. Which is a lot harder to "diminish" as it becomes part of the psyche and overall outlook on life.

For me, it's mainly anhedonia, and somewhat self-loathing. A mixture of shame, guilt, disdain for the world itself and my part in it. Where my values clash with societal ones, the overall outcome of a mental "vision". Shame of personal desires, not so much for personal integrity, but the possible effects of such on others. And overall guilt for not being able to aspire towards what others perceived me as, not living up to expectations. Yet despising selfish or greedy individuals, at the same time admiring their ambition and drive, which I share. So overall existential depression, with a nihilistic outlook on life, but within the confines of a somewhat, moralistic "meaning", given to a certain level of personal integrity. Which, I greatly respect due to the self-control, self-discipline, and skill involved. However, at the end it leads to an inability to reconcile the ego with desires, seeing desires as fleeting material wants, but within the moral confines of all that one respects. So to either lose self-respect, and in a sense "honor" by subjection to said desires, or to hold dignity within absence? The truth would lay in happiness, however, such is a state of mind. One cannot be "happy", if one becomes all they hold in contempt, can they? ! A puzzling ordeal!


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## Jhaimcee (May 6, 2014)

I don't have extremely bad depression, but i suppose that it is hard not to get depressed when you don't see many people and don't get out very much, like me. 
I see the world through, what i would call, a sort of 'grey filter' and i really wish that i could change my perspective on everything, to be more positive. I look at the future as being scary, but mainly ****. I just can't shake the feeling that the future is ****. 
Does any one have any tips for days or moments when you are feeling like this? Not necessarily extremely serious, like suicidal or anything. Just when you feel very down and negative for no reason at all? Just curious, because they can sometimes be really horrible.


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## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Sourgirl25 said:


> What are Sign and symptoms of depression? What personally, are your symptoms and experience with depression?


*Good post. People need to be educated more about Depression.*

Most common symptoms:

Loss of interest in things that used to interest you
Isolation
Severe fatigue
Insomnia ... or sleeping too much
Loss of appetite ... or eating too much
Sense of Sadness for no reason
Crying for no reason
Inability to concentrate
Slow reflexes
Irritability
Mood Swings


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## AshleyRising (Jan 12, 2015)

Cletis said:


> *Good post. People need to be educated more about Depression.*
> 
> Most common symptoms:
> 
> ...


:| Sounds a lot like me.


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