# Been an athiest for 4 years and now I can't stop thinking about death/not existing!!!



## Suds (Jan 18, 2018)

I think its because I'm at some point in my brain development (I'm 18) where for the last 5 months I can't stop being terrified and thinking about death. Its giving me very bad depression and worsening my anxiety. If someone could tell me how to get over the thought and put me at peace I'd be so grateful. Sometimes I wish I was brainwashed enough to be a christian because then I would believe in heaven. But I'm never going to be religious again for obvious reasons. Someone just give me a smart explanation or something to put me at ease with dying please!!!


----------



## Suds (Jan 18, 2018)

Ya first time on this website and idk how to edit but in the first sentence i said i was 18. idk why it put an emoji


----------



## AvoidantGuy (Oct 1, 2017)

Can you remember what is was like before you were alive? Cause neither can I. You are not going to even know anything happened when you die. Everything just will no longer be. You won't see black, you just won't see anything.

You shouldn't be afraid of death. What you should be afraid of is wasting the time you have here before you are no longer here.


----------



## ScorchedEarth (Jul 12, 2014)

You know how you can fall asleep and wake up after what feels like a moment of unconsciousness if you don't remember any dreams? Imagine that moment, but stretched to infinity. It's literally nothingness, a neutral experience by definition. Nothing terrifying about it. It's one of the very few things every living thing will experience. Not everyone is born with sight, or hearing, not everyone will live long enough to really understand or use speech... but everyone ends up in the same void eventually.


----------



## Sunb0urn (Feb 25, 2018)

Life is short, and as you get older time just seems to speed up.

Make the most of it. It's all you can do.


----------



## Kalakotkas (Feb 15, 2018)

AvoidantGuy said:


> Can you remember what is was like before you were alive? Cause neither can I. You are not going to even know anything happened when you die. Everything just will no longer be. You won't see black, you just won't see anything.
> 
> You shouldn't be afraid of death. What you should be afraid of is wasting the time you have here before you are no longer here.


I completely agree.


----------



## arenee89 (Mar 5, 2018)

I am also atheist and experience the same feeling, like mentioned above, you should try not to think about it too much and try to enjoy life in the now. Everyone will die.


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

Well at least theres not the terrifying prospect of hell right? Heaven sounds overrated anyway.


----------



## GreenTeaMenagerie (Mar 3, 2018)

I used to be terrified and but now think of my energy returning to the food chain and its quite peaceful. When I pass one day, I will be eaten by little critters, who will then be eaten by large creatures and so on. The thought of my body working its way up to be part of a forest (hopefully) is pretty neat . We are young and vibrant and at this point rightfully don't want to miss anything (even with the anxiety). I think once we get to be old and grey, at the end its less fear, but more about having had our fill of all the wonders life offers. We are then ready to go. If anything concentrate more on love and gratitude to those you love and have friendships with, you and they will not be here forever.


----------



## gumballhead (Jun 8, 2011)

no reason to be afraid of death, be happy you're alive now. it really is something to consider you even got to live at all in the first place.


----------



## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

I was born an atheist and it took me 6 years to realize it. Then it took me the rest of my life up until now to get tired of clashing with religious people trying to talk me out of it. **** them all.


----------



## Kalakotkas (Feb 15, 2018)

WillYouStopDave said:


> I was born an atheist and it took me 6 years to realize it. Then it took me the rest of my life up until now to get tired of clashing with religious people trying to talk me out of it. **** them all.


Is it hard to be an atheist in the US?


----------



## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

Kalakotkas said:


> Is it hard to be an atheist in the US?


 Not really. I was kind of exaggerating. It is, however, hard to be an atheist when your parents are religious.

Religion is a progressive mental disease. It often starts off mild and gets worse and worse. And then when people start getting old enough to start getting dementia, things really get nutty. You've got the fear of death close at hand on top of the already nutty man in the sky stuff and the normal "I'm old and crazy!" stuff.

Generally, American society is fairly secular in most places. You might hear assorted references to God or Jesus or prayer in public but it's rare that a complete stranger will accost you with their religion. It's mostly relatives who do that crap.

It would be nice if you could just ignore it but they don't want you to be able to ignore it so they push your buttons and start arguments with you on purpose and then steer it into man in the sky territory.


----------



## sad1231234 (Jul 10, 2016)

The explanation is: let go and flow with it. Thats the way the cosmos is, it sucks but you cant change it and there is no point in feeling bad about it. Relax and enjoy life.


----------



## sad1231234 (Jul 10, 2016)

GreenTeaMenagerie said:


> I used to be terrified and but now think of my energy returning to the food chain and its quite peaceful. When I pass one day, I will be eaten by little critters, who will then be eaten by large creatures and so on. The thought of my body working its way up to be part of a forest (hopefully) is pretty neat . We are young and vibrant and at this point rightfully don't want to miss anything (even with the anxiety). I think once we get to be old and grey, at the end its less fear, but more about having had our fill of all the wonders life offers. We are then ready to go. If anything concentrate more on love and gratitude to those you love and have friendships with, you and they will not be here forever.


Whatever helps you i guess. But i find the thought of deriving peace from the fact that i'm just some kind of organic battery or something to be more morbid and depressing than the actual concept of death itself lol.


----------



## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

It's difficult to confront the idea of your own mortality. I used to be insulated from it for reasons others here have described (didn't know what it was like to not be born, it's the same, you won't feel anything, etc). But existential fear has more depth than that. I think the part that I struggled with the most was the idea of fading into nothingness without having experienced what I wanted to experience in this life first. There's also the problem of meaning, and if you're non-religious, you need to define your own meaning to some degree. Though despite being agnostic, I've found that religious texts have beautiful symbolism that is very much true, regardless of whether or not there's a God. Heaven and hell are real, personal places you can inhabit, albeit in your own psyche and only metaphorical. There's a value in pursuing one over the other.

I've realized that life in and of itself is meaningful, due to the sheer improbability that you're here, right now, with consciousness. It's a pretty cool gift the cosmos gave us, and it's worth enjoying while we can. Time spent dwelling on dark or negative thoughts is time you could be spending getting the most out of those 100 trillion synapses in your noggin'. You can't control pain and suffering, and you can't stop death. But, you can choose to see the beauty in life while you've got it. That's something.


----------



## PractitionerX (Mar 21, 2018)

Life is now, life tomorrow have no meaning if you are not alive now...and u are alive..but you never know if you will be tomorrow....so live now. Do not live tomorrow or yesterday.
Time moves "faster" the older you get because there are more and more memories. There is this felling off "time must have passed for me to have done all this things"
I see life as energy, god is the earth it self, religion is so much just about power and trying to find a deep meaning with death.
Death can come tomorrow, hope I did not sin now. But it is ok, I can just ask for forgiveness right. 

I maybe can help you with the look I have on death. I see it so clear, but it is very space to say the least, When we die our atoms kinda explodes out into the world, energy goes up in the air or in the ground. Both our energy and atoms flows maybe in to a beautiful butterfly or part of a three hanging over a waterfall, some atoms gets thrown out in space, where do they go..where do parts off you wander off...
You do not stop exist. Your energy will always forever be part of this earth. 
Therefor I see it meaningless with war, because we are part off it all , we are a family all off us if you will., we are the earth, we are everything together...

I do not mean this to be spiritual, for me this is all facts this is how it is. Atoms gets thrown from you now and then, where the hell do they go???


----------



## AllGlad (Feb 16, 2018)

I also have a fear of being in state of nothingness when we die...

I think the way one has to approach this is accept it, and enjoy life as much as you can, because really I believe this is the only life you have...

You can worry about death when your in your 70s instead


----------



## shyflgirl (Apr 24, 2018)

I think my anxiety was worse before I became an atheist because then the threat of hell that had been hanging over me disappeared.


----------



## Nekobasu (Apr 22, 2018)

If you have a good life insurance plan, and can afford around $600 annual dues, look into cryonic preservation. It may not work out, but any chance is better than none at all.

https://alcor.org/


----------



## mrpeanuthead (Apr 1, 2018)

In how you practice being a Christian is what I believe is a "good thing". I've mostly been an athiest in terms of my lifestyle my whole life, though I believe that getting together with people to share hope, love, and friendship, etc, is a great thing. It's empowering. But you don't have to go on every Sunday, youth groups can be enough. This is just for myself, not advising anyone to do anything. 

My dad never went to church at all, and was always against believe in a god in the first place. I just don't want to think this way, I believe in what the religion brings to us. If you disagree that's fine, I just wanted to share my aspect.


----------



## zonebox (Oct 22, 2012)

I try to look at the good things of any one situation, while death is scary, and a cessation of existence thus the capacity to experience anything at all.. ya got to look at the good in it as well. I hesitate to mention it on this forum, but in this context I might as well.

With death, if there is nothing after.. you will no longer experience pain in any form at all. No more body aches, no more depression, no more anxiety, you won't have to wake up and do a job you hate, you'll no longer see others in pain. The bad goes along with the good, it all vanishes in such an event that we no longer exist in any form at all. That is what I concentrate on when I think of the possibility of a permanent death. No more pain, and it drastically eases the concept of it all.

Not to say I look forward to dying. I don't, but if it is going to happen and I have no control over the outcome, then I may as well find the good in it. 

With all of that said, no one really knows if death is permanent. For all we know, we could experience this life multiple times over again, perhaps our intrinsic awareness is a property of existence and in such a way we continue on, the possibilities are endless in an endless universe.


----------



## duckie (Apr 30, 2012)

Suds said:


> I think its because I'm at some point in my brain development (I'm 1 where for the last 5 months I can't stop being terrified and thinking about death. Its giving me very bad depression and worsening my anxiety. If someone could tell me how to get over the thought and put me at peace I'd be so grateful. Sometimes I wish I was brainwashed enough to be a christian because then I would believe in heaven. But I'm never going to be religious again for obvious reasons. Someone just give me a smart explanation or something to put me at ease with dying please!!!


it's a great thing that you mention "brainwashed". the fact that you realize people are brainwashed makes it much easier to realize you are also brainwashed... our minds are clean slates from the beginning. we are constantly programmed throughout our life. much of it may be truth but regardless of truth or lies all brainwashing is the source of our current problems...
the point is if any belief is causing you mental pain then it can be easily over come simply by releasing the false belief...

i identified as atheist for over a decade before i discovered the word agnostic. this word was much closer to the truth for me. not percisely but closer than atheist... our perception is a direct correlation to our environment. we believe what we see and we mimic what we perceive...

god is a man-made concept but that doesn't mean it's total fabrication. one thing is certain... we were created... it's just a matter if it was by accident or by choice.


----------



## Polaris1 (Aug 25, 2018)

I sometimes feel the same way. What I worry about is that I am not going to do all the things I want to do, and then when I'm 75 I'll look back and realize I've wasted my life and won't have anymore opportunities. If you want to live your life well, it is important to acknowledge the truth. Believing that there is an afterlife where you will be rewarded can perverse effects. I was raised in a Christian community, and I remember hearing this verse often: 
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal."
I know Christians who think hard work is really important and virtuous and are constantly working. I think hard work can be important, but if you believe there is an afterlife it can be easy to waste your life doing stuff you don't enjoy.


----------



## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)




----------



## smoothlinghs (Jun 2, 2018)

You live, you die, there is nothing. Problem solved. I think dying painfully is the most worse part and being dead is the easy part.


----------



## waxwing_slain (Sep 12, 2018)

I struggle with my fear of death and without the comfort of religion, I'm forced to face it head on. One thing I try to tell myself is that the intense, existential fear is ultimately a biological process. All (most?) living creatures will fight tooth and nail to stay alive despite not even having a solid conception of what not staying alive would mean. I suppose because our brains are so much more developed, we experience that fear even when not in immediate danger. So ultimately, I see the fear of death is normal as feeling hunger, tired, aroused, ect. 

Another thing that helps me is understanding death as a neutral rather than a bad thing. Yes, when I die I'll never laugh, smile, eat my favorite foods, play my favorite video games, watch my favorite shows, hang out with my friends and loved ones. BUT, I'll also never cry, feel terror, anxiety, boredom, depression, pain, ect. In a sense I think it all evens out to death being a very neutral thing.

It's gonna happen one way or another. It's hard, but you really are better off just enjoying what life you do have and not wasting it fearing the inevitable!


----------

