# Being comfortable with who you are



## jeepy97_21 (Nov 2, 2005)

I see a lot of negativity on here about social anxiety disorder in general and thought I would make a post on what I have learned over the years.

I have found to accept that shyness and being introverted is a part of who I am and that a lot of those things I can't change. Personally I like who I am and wouldn't want to change either. The only part of SA/ being introverted I don't like is the limitations it puts on my life. If those limitations didn't exist I'd be happy as can be keeping to myself most the time and being a homebody.

A lot of important people throughout history were introverts and made a huge impact on what the world is today. Introverts tend to be more intelligent as well since we focus within and think about things more, instead of spending all our time getting our energy from other people.

Another thing I have noticed is that people with SA seem to be for the most part, extremely kind hearted and caring people. I can't think of any other personality trait better then that.

Don't get me wrong, SA is frustrating. But I try to look at the good side of things and feel that if someone doesn't accept me for the way I am or thinks less of me because of that, then that is their problem not mine. 

We should always strive to improve ourselves, but my advice is not to get hung up with trying to make yourself the complete opposite of who you are. Concentrate on little steps towards improvement, Like going to a social gathering, or eating a sandwich in public, making eye contact with someone, etc. instead of trying to change your whole personality. Always try to improve as much as you can and never give up but at the same time don't get frustrated with some of the things you might not be able to change.


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## Phobos (Jun 14, 2006)

Very good thinking :clap 

I still have trouble forgiving myself for certain "unacceptable" actions I've taken in the past, but I'm getting better at accepting myself and viewing myself in a more positive light.

To begin with, I've learned that I really am a good person; lots of people out there just don't have the level of consideration towards others that I have. Of course, I often see people on these boards that come across as more considerate and helpful than myself, which I view as a positive source of inspiration.


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## nightmahr (Jan 2, 2008)

Yeah I like being extremely sensitive even if it makes me insane. I don't miss much at least.


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## GreyFox08 (Dec 22, 2007)

Really good insight(s). I definitely think way too much about wanting to be more talkative, when I know I could really just say a few things here and there when I want to, and it'd be fine. I could probably be just fine doing that, actually. And it'd be sort of closer to what I'm like at home, at least. That's one thing I'd like to improve, is speaking up when I want to say something at school (or wherever, I guess), if only just a little bit, no matter how much I think it's going to sound weird.


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## Gerard (Feb 3, 2004)

Excellent post. I agree with all the points you have made, jeepy97_21.

Thanks. 

Sincerely,
Gerard


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## ghostgurl (Sep 20, 2004)

Agreed.


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## ImAboutToEXPLODE (Nov 20, 2007)

> The only part of SA/ being introverted I don't like is the limitations it puts on my life


I agree very much.

I have no problem being somewhat introverted, even if i had no social anxiety i wouldn't be the "opposite" of the person i am today, i wouldn't babble all the time and be constantly contact seeking.


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## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

> ImAboutToEXPLODE said:
> 
> 
> > [quote:jola5le4]The only part of SA/ being introverted I don't like is the limitations it puts on my life
> ...


[/quote:jola5le4]

:ditto


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## Wingclipped (Nov 13, 2007)

x


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## jeepy97_21 (Nov 2, 2005)

wingsclipped, from what I have read, it is true that extroverts get social anxiety as well. Someone who is extroverted and has social anxiety would want to aim a little higher, since they draw their energy from other people. But this doesn't mean that the extroverts out there should get dissapointed when they don't make progress or make progess at little steps at a time. Small steps is the way to go. Some people get over social anxiety completely and become very outgoing, but I feel that these people were very extroverted to begin with. Being an introvert, I will never even really have the desire to be social ALL the time, it goes completely against my personality. I was born shy I guess you could say. It was the worrying about my natural shyness and worrying about what people think of me that caused my social anxiety. When someone like me who is introverted can accept that as who they am and appreciate it, its a very big step to recovery.


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## Wingclipped (Nov 13, 2007)

x


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## Anxiety75 (Feb 10, 2004)

Well said. I agree.


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## raymac_6262 (Dec 31, 2007)

Sorry, this might be conflicting somewhat with what you have said, but given my circumstances, I don't entirely agree with what you said as being positive.
I think because of my circumstances, and how I developed social anxiety disorder, I might have a different perspective on things. 
The thing is before I developed social anxiety, I was a calm, focused, confident, and charismatic person, and introverted at the same time. Don't get me wrong, I had my nervous moments, and was not the most popular guy in town, but I was very comfortable in my own skin, in 90% of situations. Its not something I've lived with all my life, its something that happened out of nowhere, for no real particular reason. IN this sense, I don't feel like myself anymore. I won't accept social anxiety as part of my character and I will do everything in my power to get through this period of my life. Sure I accept it at the moment, but I will never think that this is how I will always be, (knowing how I was before!). I believe that we have the power to change anything about our perception of reality.


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