# College Roommate



## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

So I'm going to be a sophomore in college this year, and I'll have a roommate for the first time. (Last year I was lucky enough to have a room to myself) I'm really nervous lol. Especially since my roommate is very extroverted and has a lot of friends. I messaged her on Facebook today to say hi and she seemed friendly. Do you guys think I should tell her that I'm pretty shy and introverted? Because I feel like she'll think I hate her because I'm so quiet. I also fear being judged since I have no friends to hang out with, yet she'll probably be going out and having friends over all the time. I don't mind being a loner - it's actually a refreshing feeling for me. But I don't want people to pity me because I'm alone all the time or think I'm a weirdo...

If any of you guys have had a roommate in college/university, how did it go?


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## Daveyboy (Jan 13, 2013)

I wouldn't tell her upfront..
Maybe you two will "click", I mean sometimes you meet people in life and it just goes smoothly..
Why put that out there now and then know in your mind that this is what she expects..

I would play it by ear, then when you talk to her face to face after a few times and you still feel that way just explain that you like quiet and you are really into schooling..
Good luck...


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## Daveyboy (Jan 13, 2013)

Lol.. I feel like a thread killa...Come on people


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## FunkyFedoras (Aug 30, 2013)

Well my roommate my freshman year didn't like me. So we never talked to each other. We just coexisted in our room in silence, well, unless the radio was on. But this is actually a really common story. A lot of people don't click with their roommates so they never talk to them. This year, I know my roommate because she was already my friend and my suite mates are great! They are all very friendly. My roommate from freshman year probably thought all kinds of things about me but whatever, wasn't fond of her either. It's a lot better this year since I know my roommate.  
Even if you don't click with your roommate, don't think too much into it. You're not the only one it will be happening to at your school!


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Thanks guys. I actually did end up talking to my roommate a bit and told her I was shy, but she still ended up asking if I wanted to hang out and get to know eachother on Monday. :eek I'm pretty nervous and worried she'll think I'm boring or weird...But yeah, I guess like FunkyFedoras said, there are probably a lot of roommates in college who don't necessarily get along.


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## tbyrfan (Feb 24, 2011)

mezzoforte said:


> Thanks guys. I actually did end up talking to my roommate a bit and told her I was shy, but she still ended up asking if I wanted to hang out and get to know eachother on Monday. :eek I'm pretty nervous and worried she'll think I'm boring or weird...But yeah, I guess like FunkyFedoras said, there are probably a lot of roommates in college who don't necessarily get along.


That's really nice of her to offer that. I hope things go well. And FunkyFedoras is right, a lot of roommates don't get along. Most people I know didn't end up being friends with their roommate.

I have great and terrible roommate stories. My freshman year sucked, but my sophomore year was great. During my freshman year, I actually had to switch roommates after 3 weeks because my roommate was a huge partier/drinker and would make fun of me for staying in (she moved to another room in our suite and continued to do it). I ended up having 2 friends in the suite, got along well with 2 but didn't talk to them that much, and didn't like the 2 others (my ex-roommate and her friend). By the end of the year, I was no longer friends with the 2 people in my suite because one ditched me out of nowhere and started bullying me for being skinny and studying a lot, and the other became extremely religious, racist, and homophobic.

For sophomore year, I applied for the wellness dorms because I knew that the people there had similar interests to me. My roommate and I got along great and ended up being friends, and I made friends with a bunch of people on my floor. All of the 7 other people in my suite were super friendly, and we all got along great and hung out in our dorm a lot. I decided to commute junior year and this year, but I still talk to the people I lived with sophomore year whenever I see them around campus.


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## Cam1 (Dec 4, 2011)

It was so awkward. We exchanged hellos on the first day which was awkward. He walked in and I was just sitting there I said hey, he said hey, then he left the room. I attempted to start a conversation with him but it didn't go well. After the first week we literally NEVER spoke to each other. Not even a hello, both of us were extremely uncomfortable. He also was really stinky and a loud snorer. He liked to stay up really late playing his play station and would come in stoned every other night and start eating cheeseballs from the worlds largest cheeseball bin that he kept. I used to avoid the room all the time because it was so awkward, we eventually figured each others schedules out and went out of our way to avoid each other. It was an awful experience, hopefully you get a better roommate than I had lol.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

tbyrfan said:


> I have great and terrible roommate stories. My freshman year sucked, but my sophomore year was great. During my freshman year, I actually had to switch roommates after 3 weeks because my roommate was a huge partier/drinker and would make fun of me for staying in (she moved to another room in our suite and continued to do it). I ended up having 2 friends in the suite, got along well with 2 but didn't talk to them that much, and didn't like the 2 others (my ex-roommate and her friend). By the end of the year, I was no longer friends with the 2 people in my suite because one ditched me out of nowhere and started bullying me for being skinny and studying a lot, and the other became extremely religious, racist, and homophobic.





Cam1 said:


> It was so awkward. We exchanged hellos on the first day which was awkward. He walked in and I was just sitting there I said hey, he said hey, then he left the room. I attempted to start a conversation with him but it didn't go well. After the first week we literally NEVER spoke to each other. Not even a hello, both of us were extremely uncomfortable. He also was really stinky and a loud snorer. He liked to stay up really late playing his play station and would come in stoned every other night and start eating cheeseballs from the worlds largest cheeseball bin that he kept. I used to avoid the room all the time because it was so awkward, we eventually figured each others schedules out and went out of our way to avoid each other. It was an awful experience, hopefully you get a better roommate than I had lol.


:afr


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## AhDo (Aug 6, 2013)

my first roommate was pretty chill. Not a really social guy but he was nice. We would grab dinner together and play basketball sometimes. We weren't really the best of buddies though

My second roommate also wasn't very social. I hate eating alone and asked him to eat with me a couple times but he would just go to the dining hall alone without me. He didn't give me much problems though

I'm in a single this year finally, although I have suitemates. I don't think I'll run into problems with them because guys don't usually talk chit or fight with each other unless they never have their own personal space

I think I lucked out the first two years getting people who weren't complete *******s


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

And here come the physical symptoms of anxiety...ugh.  I hope I can calm down by tomorrow.


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## nullptr (Sep 21, 2012)

mezzoforte said:


> Thanks guys. I actually did end up talking to my roommate a bit and told her I was shy, but she still ended up asking if I wanted to hang out and get to know eachother on Monday. :eek I'm pretty nervous and worried she'll think I'm boring or weird...But yeah, I guess like FunkyFedoras said, there are probably a lot of roommates in college who don't necessarily get along.


I think I would be more nervous they would find me boring.


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

What are these dorm rooms typically like in the US? Do you share a single room or do you have separate bedrooms like in an apartment?

People tend not to live on campus here so I'm curious...


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## FunkyFedoras (Aug 30, 2013)

TicklemeRingo said:


> What are these dorm rooms typically like in the US? Do you share a single room or do you have separate bedrooms like in an apartment?
> 
> People tend not to live on campus here so I'm curious...


It depends where you go to school. Here, we have both communal housing and suite style. The communal is where your room is quite small, enough for 2 twin beds and 2 desks that they give you. And there's about 2-3 feet between your beds I wanna say. You share a bathroom with everyone on the floor. In the suite style, mine is actually quite large compared to some college dorms I have visited because we have room for the 2 beds, 2 desks, 2 giant wardrobes and a ton of extra space to walk. With suites here though, it's 2 people per room and you share a bathroom that connects your room (no common area with chairs or anything). Just room, door to bathroom, door to other room. And the bathroom area is quite large considering it is for 4 people. There's also singles in suite style, where it's only 1 per room with a shared bathroom area. I did see this YouTube video of a kid going to school in England and his bed was literally .5 m from the stuff aganist his wall and it was extremely narrow in that room and everything was right next to each other and very compact.

@OP, YAY YOU'RE HANGING OUT! Hope it goes well, she sounds nice (;


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## tbyrfan (Feb 24, 2011)

TicklemeRingo said:


> What are these dorm rooms typically like in the US? Do you share a single room or do you have separate bedrooms like in an apartment?
> 
> People tend not to live on campus here so I'm curious...


Here are all the dorm types i've heard of:

singles: 1 bed
doubles: 2 beds
split double: 2 beds with a wall down the middle, so essentially 2 singles
triples: 3 beds 
quads: 4 beds 
suites: at my school, 4 doubles sharing a common room and bathroom, so 8 people in total

I lived in suites for 2 years. I've heard that quads are the worst - you never get any privacy or peace and quiet because there are 4 people in the same room. Suites are a horrible choice for freshmen, because people tend to keep their doors closed and don't socialize with people from other suites, so it's way harder to make friends. People at my school who had doubles freshman year tended to be happiest.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

TicklemeRingo said:


> What are these dorm rooms typically like in the US? Do you share a single room or do you have separate bedrooms like in an apartment?
> 
> People tend not to live on campus here so I'm curious...


A single room  The room is in a suite with 3 other girls and each room is connected to the common/living room area with a kitchen and bathroom.



FunkyFedoras said:


> @OP, YAY YOU'RE HANGING OUT! Hope it goes well, she sounds nice (;


Thanks. So nervous though


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## Xsy (Dec 7, 2009)

Just a general advice for living long term with a roommate or roommates, always be yourself. For example if the roommate is extroverted and will try to push you to do certain things you wont always want to do, its ok to refuse. The thing about living with a certain person, in one room for a few years is that you get to know each other beyond the petty:" Oh I invited her to come to a party with me and she refused, what a *****". She will eventually understand the way your mind works and will adjust accordingly. These things take time of course, so just make sure you act nicely and explain your choices and feelings.


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

Thanks for those answers to my question 

That sounds pretty scary, to be honest. It's basically like being asked to go camping with a complete stranger for months :afr


Good luck Mezzo! 

You never know, it could turn out unexpectedly well for you.


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## WhatBITW (Jan 26, 2013)

I'd tell you to be thankful that you're getting the experience of having a roommate, and being in college but whatevs.


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## Soundboy (Feb 16, 2013)

Big bang theory comes to mind


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Xsy said:


> Just a general advice for living long term with a roommate or roommates, always be yourself. For example if the roommate is extroverted and will try to push you to do certain things you wont always want to do, its ok to refuse. The thing about living with a certain person, in one room for a few years is that you get to know each other beyond the petty:" Oh I invited her to come to a party with me and she refused, what a *****". She will eventually understand the way your mind works and will adjust accordingly. These things take time of course, so just make sure you act nicely and explain your choices and feelings.


Thank you. Things are going pretty well I guess. I still think I'd rather commute next year though. :b


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