# I feel Insane a lot of the time



## Snowblind89 (Jul 27, 2010)

Does anyone else feel completely insane? I think I am a hypochondriac when it comes to mental illness. I definitely have social anxiety but I sometimes feel like it is caused by something far more serious. Social anxiety often accompanies other disorders like borderline personality disorder, or bi-polar disorder and how can I be certain that I don't have them as well?

I am very worried that I may become schizophrenic in the future or develop more serious mental disorders. I notice that people who have mental problems are constantly avoided but never told directly why it is that people avoid them. People seem to shun me and not want to talk to me after a short while, even though they initially are friendly. This makes me feel like they notice that I am mentally ill and then don't talk to me anymore. I have no friends, and people who are in my class seem to instantly recognize that something is wrong with me. No one has ever told me why they avoid me. 

Lately I have been worrying that I am talking outloud to myself in public without realizing it, or talking outloud in my sleep, and also that I am making weird facial expressions in public without knowing that I am doing it. I usually pass these thoughts off as delusions, especially when I am at home and feel safe, but when in public they spring up again, especially if I hear people laughing. When people laugh I instantly assume that they laugh at me and even think that I may have **** on my pants and don't realize it because I can't smell it myself. Is this even a part of social anxiety?


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## Still Waters (Sep 18, 2008)

It's easy to feel paranoid and have irrational thoughts when you're not a "part of the whole" There's a tendency to constantly dissect and over analyze everything in order to discover what's amiss. I've had some pretty weird thoughts-even knowing at the time they weren't rational-did little to eradicate them. People pick up on our feelings in a given situation even when we don't realize it-Could this be what's happening with you?


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## kid a (Aug 26, 2010)

i worry about the same thing. atleast once a day i question myself? 
im always thinking im having auditory hallucinations an yesterday i thought i had a visual one, but its a catch 22 scenario for me because the more i think about it the more my brain will play tricks on me an make me actually have those things,it shouldnt happen at all but for me it does, the paranoia , over analyzation, all of that its stressful


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## Snowblind89 (Jul 27, 2010)

Thanks for your post, it is probably people picking up on my feelings. I was just worried that it wasn't social anxiety anymore but some other problem.


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## Snowblind89 (Jul 27, 2010)

I think I over analyze things as well. I think that is why I am freaking out about having other problems.


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## Metus (Dec 6, 2010)

Snowblind89 said:


> I think I over analyze things as well. I think that is why I am freaking out about having other problems.


I _know_ that I over-analyze things. It's an asset with some things but many times it's a liability.

Have you ever wished that you could shut down your thoughts? I guess that's why drinking appeals to me. It's like a vacation for my brain.


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## Snowblind89 (Jul 27, 2010)

Metus said:


> Have you ever wished that you could shut down your thoughts? I guess that's why drinking appeals to me. It's like a vacation for my brain.


Alcohol is commonly known to appeal to people with SA. After I drink enough it makes my anxiety disappear. But I hate the stupid situation I end up in when I drink.


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## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

I doubt that you're insane, you sound like you might have a little bit of hypochondriasis. And this in conjunction with the negative perceptions might be making you a little sketched.

Try to be objective about it, try keeping a thought diary but watch for patterns and analyse as a whole instead of on single thoughts.

This might take a few weeks to build up something tangible and useful, but overall it might give you a better picture.

_And if you're really worried talk to your doctor._

That stuff about you talking to people and then them losing interest sounds like textbook social anxiety.

Don't worry man, just try and stay above it.


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## astockm (Dec 6, 2010)

SNOWBLIND I completely understand. I ended up dropping out of college because of my delusional thoughts and paranoidfeelings of people judging me. I still have them, but I would recommend you talk to your Dr. I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and social anxiety. I can relate to you in alot of ways. Just wanted to tell you it IS completely normal for you to feel the way you are..Once you think one way, your thoughts get more intense and it just spirals down from there. Am i right? Thats how it is for me.. its a vicious cycle and the anxiety gets worse the more I think. SO you arent alone


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## ALopes (Nov 30, 2010)

Snowblind89 said:


> Does anyone else feel completely insane? I think I am a hypochondriac when it comes to mental illness. I definitely have social anxiety but I sometimes feel like it is caused by something far more serious. Social anxiety often accompanies other disorders like borderline personality disorder, or bi-polar disorder and how can I be certain that I don't have them as well?
> 
> I am very worried that I may become schizophrenic in the future or develop more serious mental disorders. I notice that people who have mental problems are constantly avoided but never told directly why it is that people avoid them. People seem to shun me and not want to talk to me after a short while, even though they initially are friendly. This makes me feel like they notice that I am mentally ill and then don't talk to me anymore. I have no friends, and people who are in my class seem to instantly recognize that something is wrong with me. No one has ever told me why they avoid me.
> 
> *Lately I have been worrying that I am talking outloud to myself in public without realizing it,* or talking outloud in my sleep, a*nd also that I am making weird facial expressions in public without knowing that I am doing it. I usually pass these thoughts off as delusions, especially when I am at home and feel safe, but when in public they spring up again, especially if I hear people laughing. When people laugh I instantly assume that they laugh at me and even think that I may have **** on my pants and don't realize it because I can't smell it myself. Is this even a part of social anxiety?*


Wow That Honestly Sums Up How I've Been Feelin' Lately. I'd Sit In Class & Wonder A Couple Mins Back To Think If iWas Talkin Outloud To Myself Without Noticing It. I'm Guessin' This Is A Mixture Of Paranoia & Somewhat Of Delusional Thinking. One Question, Have Yu Smoked Marijuana In The Past? Lik Is Marijuana What Caused All Of This For Yu ?


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

I fyou feel like you are going crazy, you probably aren't. It is a common fear with anxiety. All the analysis is making you think you are going crazy. Been there. You are fine.


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## bmwfan07 (Jun 3, 2007)

You don't have delusions or psychosis (disclaimer: according to the way you convey yourself in your posts; obviously, none of us can be entirely sure of that, but take this as me covering my *** not as further concern for worrying). You have OCD. There is enormous overlap between OCD and health anxiety, or hypochondriasis. In fact, the two are pretty analogous, except that the latter generally involves preoccupations with physical ailments, versus mental ailments in the former. On an OCD forum I frequent, there is actually a name folks over there have invented for OCD obsessions with schizophrenia--s-ocd. How clever.  Here's a Google search on that site that you can read till you're blue in the face that should inform you that there are literally thousands of people out there with the same exact concerns that you have. And statistically, almost none of them will actually go on to develop a psychotic disorder. http://www.google.com/#hl=en&safe=o...QeJqc3lBA&ved=0CCoQrQIwAQ&fp=4488cb887e893d25

The thing with OCD is that you can't be *sure* that any of your obsessions aren't true. You just have to accept that your obsessions are caused by a mental disorder (OCD) and are not your true feelings, concerns, or preoccupations. If you had borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder, you would manifest symptoms of those that others would notice, comment on, and suggest you seek help for. If they didn't, obviously your symptoms aren't prevalent enough to be impairing, and thus you wouldn't be diagnosed with the problem in the first place. 

Now, the bitter irony here (although somewhat irrelevant, I feel the need to state my "truth" here) is that social phobia and OCD *are* often comorbid with, or part of, bipolar spectrum disorders (often manifesting at first in anergic/atypical depression). It isn't necessarily a severe form of bipolar, and you may not have it at all, but just know that it isn't uncommon, and a lot of people go undiagnosed with it their whole lives and do just fine (relatively speaking... I think social phobia itself is life-impairing). It's just a label. I, for instance, had never been depressed until just a couple of months ago after some stressful life events that probably altered my neurochemistry enough to actually manifest an existing predisposition. I have atypical depressive symptoms (oversleeping, somewhat increased appetite and carb preference, worsening at night, mood reactivity to external events, etc.). So it's somewhat inevitable that I probably have some form, whether mild or otherwise, of bipolar spectrum disorder, but I've done so much reading in the past few weeks that I know this *can* be conquered and it *isn't* life-ending. And you should know that, too. No matter what diagnosis you get, even severe paranoid schizophrenia (again, chances of that are infinitesimally small, ironically especially if you're so obsessed with it), statistics overwhelmingly dictate that you'll respond well to treatment and be able to live a pretty normal life.

If you want to desensitize yourself to these conditions about which you're so worried, Google for forums that cater to people with those disorders. Read about their daily lives, their struggles, their treatment, their medications, and realize that life isn't as daunting or as intimidating as you currently think it is. I think all of us with OCD are inherently pathological doubters and pessimists, but it's a function of our condition, not us. Just know, whenever you get one of those thoughts--"am I bipolar?" or, as in my case, "is this hypomanic behavior?" in response to *anything* I'd do--just laugh and realize your OCD is trying to back you into a corner and make you panic. Don't let it.

If you'd like to read a book that will inevitably help you overcome most of your OCD if you apply its principles, take a look: http://www.amazon.com/Brain-Lock-Yourself-Obsessive-Compulsive-Behavior/dp/0060987111


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## Justaproblemm (Jul 10, 2015)

Snowblind i totally agree i may be 13 but im having major issues with myself. For instant keep thinking im nothing or having insanity seeing things loss of conscious and many more can anybody help?


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## lonerroom (May 16, 2015)

Snowblind89 said:


> Does anyone else feel completely insane? I think I am a hypochondriac when it comes to mental illness. I definitely have social anxiety but I sometimes feel like it is caused by something far more serious. Social anxiety often accompanies other disorders like borderline personality disorder, or bi-polar disorder and how can I be certain that I don't have them as well?
> 
> I am very worried that I may become schizophrenic in the future or develop more serious mental disorders. I notice that people who have mental problems are constantly avoided but never told directly why it is that people avoid them. People seem to shun me and not want to talk to me after a short while, even though they initially are friendly. This makes me feel like they notice that I am mentally ill and then don't talk to me anymore. I have no friends, and people who are in my class seem to instantly recognize that something is wrong with me. No one has ever told me why they avoid me.
> 
> Lately I have been worrying that I am talking outloud to myself in public without realizing it, or talking outloud in my sleep, and also that I am making weird facial expressions in public without knowing that I am doing it. I usually pass these thoughts off as delusions, especially when I am at home and feel safe, but when in public they spring up again, especially if I hear people laughing. When people laugh I instantly assume that they laugh at me and even think that I may have **** on my pants and don't realize it because I can't smell it myself. Is this even a part of social anxiety?


I often wonder the same thing to myself because people avoid me too, people make act nice and friendly to me but after a couple hang outs they completely avoid and ignore me and treat me like I don't exist. One friend once told me they couldn't hang out with me on Thanks Giving because it was for "family and close friends only".


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