# eye contact



## lovedbyChrist (Dec 6, 2011)

My goal is making eye contact everywhere. I started about a month ago and I'm shocked and bewildered at the ease of it. Hopefully I can encourage someone out there. 

I have never done this before with any intensity, till now at age 36.

One night in bed I tried to calm my whole body down, telling each body part to relax, foot to legs, to abdomen to neck to head. Then I day-dreamed about making eye contact with everyone at work for about an hour, at the same time kept telling my self "Eye Contact Good". I noticed a subtle problem saying "Make eye contact" was bothersome but just saying "eye contact good" made it seem possible.

I have successfully made prolong eye contact with my lead at work, shorter eye contact with others and even a few good seconds with a girl I like. I have also done this with total strangers and purposely remind my self to do it every time I enter a store and see the cashier. I have a note in my truck that says eye contact to remind myself.

One time though I made eye contact with a stranger in the store and I was surprised that she said hello. I was stunned and didn't say anything and felt quite nervous all of a sudden, but as I walked passed I made eye contact with another stranger. hopefully I can make eye contact then have at least a small smile rather than ignore the person who says hello.


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## Lemonmonger (Mar 12, 2013)

That's awesome! Eye contact with superiors is always unnerving. I've never really had a problem with eye contact, just conversations. Did you at least smile at the lady?


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## lovedbyChrist (Dec 6, 2011)

No, I didn't. I'm sure I had my regular face of looking bored.


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## Quail (Jun 8, 2013)

It is a corking goal! 
Actually start it, I begin to feel like a goodwill ambassador of a small country of the name of me. it makes change with approaching persons.


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## Bawsome (Jan 8, 2013)

Its a good thing to practice, my conversations with people are much better cos im not looking away and i can pay more attention to there body language. its great some of the reactions you get when staring at strangers or when dealing with people, being able to look at some one and smile at them is also one of the greatest things about this.


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## Quail (Jun 8, 2013)

Bawsome said:


> its great some of the reactions you get when staring at strangers or when dealing with people, being able to look at some one and smile at them is also one of the greatest things about this.


 I agree it. I went to beach in the morning, I made eye contact with older person, she gave me a greeting with a big smile. I have felt refreshed.


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## Aether17 (Jun 24, 2013)

I struggle with this every day, every where. I'm going to try this "eye contact good" and see if it helps. Thanks for sharing!


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## Bawsome (Jan 8, 2013)

Quail said:


> I agree it. I went to beach in the morning, I made eye contact with older person, she gave me a greeting with a big smile. I have felt refreshed.


Been doing some learning on stuff, and learned this interesting fact about eye contact and why its important, it releases Vasopressin and Oxytocin which is related to having relationships with people, so having a lack of eye contact might result in a person having a harder or maybe take a longer time building a strong relationship with another person, the video is here,


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## D0M1N1K (Jun 6, 2013)

For some people, I can make good eye contact with them, but with others, it's difficult and I don't know why


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## ghostface (May 31, 2012)

I can't take people seriously enough to maintain eye contact. On the rare occasion that I do, I begin to giggle hysterically like a schoolgirl.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

Great thread, I'm doing something similar myself.


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## Mandei (Jun 10, 2013)

Its easy with adults, but with people in my age its difficult.


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## Haven49 (Jun 16, 2013)

Well done on meeting your goal so far!!  
I'm going to try your tip of "eye contact good", it sounds rather helpful and a more positive spin off of the other command.
I'm working on eye contact as well...baby steps right??


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## Kohleye (Jun 20, 2013)

Awesome!! "Eye contact good", hehe! Here where I live people get pissed off if you look at them though, so wouldn't work here.. At least with younger ppl.

I've practised eye contact when talking one on one, but still my mind goes blank if I look at their eyes for too long.


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## Quail (Jun 8, 2013)

Bawsome said:


> Been doing some learning on stuff, and learned this interesting fact about eye contact and why its important, it releases Vasopressin and Oxytocin which is related to having relationships with people, so having a lack of eye contact might result in a person having a harder or maybe take a longer time building a strong relationship with another person, the video is here,


Thank you informative post! I got why then I feel happy.


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## HanSolo (Jul 5, 2013)

Eye contact and adding a smile when talking to any girls I would like to meet again

Today I forgot to smile at her. Yesterday I lost confidence the 2nd time seeing another girl at the checkout, more down to people being there.

Some girls can put a big smile on my face right away, or with the smallest amount of encouragement

Others girls even if they are cute I would have to force 1 which I'm really really bad at and it would look fake so I'm not going to do that.


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