# Ask this girl out in a couple of weeks.



## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

Okay my goal is to ask this girl out in a couple of weeks, (after i get to know her). We sit at the same table in a class together and she sits across from me. after the class introduced themselves we had a quiz to see who remembered who. She raised her hand when the teacher asked who i was and she remembered my name, ( no big deal). Thats not the only thing though... i started drawing/dootling on a piece of paper and then i noticed she started to draw on her paper too. maybe none of that means jack, but i am interested in her so im going to make this my goal. i was hoping i could get some support on here and i'd like to share my progress with you guys. just something else i thought was important is that she is quiet but not really shy? i can't explain it. hopefully if anyone gives me advice - its advice that works with quieter girls lol.

this class is once a week and i want to give it some time before i ask her out. my only plan is to catch up to her in the hallway after class and talk to her. we have a group project coming up eventually and i want to ask her to be in my group.

if anyone wants to advise me on things to say, conversation starters/maintainers, how i should ask her out, etc... would be appreciated and maybe other people who are reading this thread can get some good tips too.

remember ... my main goal is to ask her out. if i fail to do so i want you guys to rip on me for it.


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## Define Me (Jan 2, 2012)

Hey dude!

You're her secret admirer! 

Get to know her before you make any move. I made the mistake of skipping that part and made a fool of myself. If you get to know her, don't get in the friend zone. Be assertive and make slight jokes on her good features. Don't sugercoat it, just be natural about it, like small things. If you get to know her, just say that you like how her hair is today blabla.

Then ask her number when you feel comfortable and are fairly sure she will say yes.

AND REMEMBER!

If she says no, so what? I mean, if it's not meant to be, it's not. And if she says no, we'll be here to comfort you bro!


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

Define Me said:


> Hey dude!
> 
> You're her secret admirer!
> 
> ...


yay! one supporter! lol.

i heard from some girls that becoming their friend first was actually a good thing, (before becoming a boyfriend). i'm not disagreeing with what you said but i'm just wondering what you think about it.


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## Jamipat (Dec 2, 2011)

Seeing as you two are in the same class, you can start a conversation with her before the class starts or at the end of the class. If you have breaks in between, that would be a very good opportunity.

As for conversation starters, 

. Firstly, comment on the weather

. Then ask her what other subject she does, then tell her the subjects you do and comment on which ones you love/hate and why. Then ask her what subjects she love/hate and why.

. Ask her how her day/week was, then tell her how your day/week was. Anything interesting or the ones you're dreading, that you'll do later on the same day/next day/next week/etc... tell her. 

. Ask her where she lives, then comment on where you live and how long it takes to get to school, and what your transport is. If the journey is boring or interesting, describe it.

. Ask her what her plans/career goals after college are, then tell her yours.


In terms of maintaining conversations, giving the fact that the class is every week, always ask her how her week was, then tell her what you did in your week and any interesting/odd/funny thing that happened to you as well. 
If you get any homeworks in your class, ask her how she is getting on with them, and then tell her how you're getting on with your homework.

When you two eventually become friends, if you want to do any activity like for example go to the cinema to watch a certain film or so, casually ask her if she would like to go with you.


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

Jamipat said:


> Seeing as you two are in the same class, you can start a conversation with her before the class starts or at the end of the class. If you have breaks in between, that would be a very good opportunity.
> 
> As for conversation starters,
> 
> ...


That is some solid stuff Jamipat. I appreciate your posts you guys, and I will inform you of my progress.


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## Jamipat (Dec 2, 2011)

Banks said:


> I will inform you of my progress.


I'll be waiting .


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

alright so todays class went good. i didn't really get a chance to talk to the girl directly but i joked around about stuff with her and kinda made it a comfortable zone for us basically. she saw one of my drawings and said it was really good, and btw i was looking like a stud today. all in all it was a great day - if everything continues to go according to plan then i will be one happy man. i definitely overcame all my social anxiety today. im one step closer to asking her out - i just need more time for her to get to know me a little better and then ill pop the question!


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## Jamipat (Dec 2, 2011)

Banks said:


> alright so todays class went good. i didn't really get a chance to talk to the girl directly but i joked around about stuff with her and kinda made it a comfortable zone for us basically. she saw one of my drawings and said it was really good, and btw i was looking like a stud today. all in all it was a great day - if everything continues to go according to plan then i will be one happy man. i definitely overcame all my social anxiety today. im one step closer to asking her out - i just need more time for her to get to know me a little better and then ill pop the question!


That's great to hear.


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## Silent Image (Dec 22, 2010)

I think she likes you, but is waiting for you to make the move


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

Silent Image said:


> I think she likes you, but is waiting for you to make the move


yeah i feel like she likes me too. i think i'll give it one more week to build up more of a comfort zone then the next week after ill ask her out. any objections on that? i also wonder if i should start flirting soon lol... like next class?


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## user12345 (Jan 10, 2012)

Banks said:


> yeah i feel like she likes me too. i think i'll give it one more week to build up more of a comfort zone then the next week after ill ask her out. any objections on that? i also wonder if i should start flirting soon lol... like next class?


Start flirting, otherwise she will just think you want to be her friend and then that makes things harder!


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

R91 said:


> Start flirting, otherwise she will just think you want to be her friend and then that makes things harder!


i believe you. time to take it to the next level!


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## TheoBobTing (Jul 8, 2010)

Banks said:


> i started drawing/dootling on a piece of paper and then i noticed she started to draw on her paper too.


That's known as mirroring, and is usually a positive sign. Often people mirror other people without even realising they are doing it. It could mean she fancies you. You should keep an eye on her body language and look for other signs of attraction.


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## Subwolf (Feb 1, 2012)

> if anyone wants to advise me on things to say, conversation starters/maintainers, how i should ask her out, etc... would be appreciated and maybe other people who are reading this thread can get some good tips too.


Like this:


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

okay so there is a term for mirroring - that's good to know actually haha wasnt sure. maybe she is into me, it's so hard to tell in my opinion. she did comment on how good my drawing was. she also holds eye contact with me whenever i talk, but most people usually do. she laughs at almost everything i say, but i smile a lot too and it might be contagious. i think next class i will actually ask her if she wants to go get coffee. i figure catching up to her in the hallway after class? would be the best time? i've been thinking about it lately and i don't want to wait too long because i might lose an opportunity here, you know? thanks for your input R91, TheoBobTing, and Subwolf, (that video cracked me up).


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## KaliumRookie (Jan 31, 2012)

.


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

SHaFeDuDe said:


> This is probably useless since you have gotten as far as you are but:
> 
> Always be relaxed and if you ever catch you heart racing in front of her slow your breathing down to normal to relax. This will definitely help with your SA.
> Also be confident but not to much you don't want to do something that you can't do.
> ...


just putting your 2 cents in is appreciated. i will try to maintain my confidence and keep relaxed. i've been looking for guides on flirting and they all say things along the lines of, "just start conversation with her". i thought flirting was like...*hitting* on someone. i've definitely been talking to her just not *hitting* on her. i'll surprise her next class when i ask her out for coffee. i just don't want time to go by and let her SLIP OUT OF MY GRASP! but thanks for your input shafedude


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## Zstanmore (Feb 3, 2012)

Banks said:


> i'll surprise her next class when i ask her out for coffee. i just don't want time to go by and let her SLIP OUT OF MY GRASP! but thanks for your input shafedude


youre right, dont let her SLIP OF YOUR GRASP!

This reminds me myself in your age /now Im 29.
Whatever you come up with just do it before is too late. I have missed some opportunities with terific girl which I knew she liked me and waited for my move. I still keep bashing myself for it! I wish I found courage that time.

Luckily, I found myself in possition similar to yours later. I was not able to this girl directly, but what I did was, I put a notice into her jacket pocket in cloakroom, saying LOOK, YOU SEEM TO WATCH ME OVER, HERE IS MY NO, IF YOU WANT GIVE IN TOUCH.

Later on started comunication, we went to a nice outdoor trip. The outcome was she was not that much keen of me I expected and no romance came to life.

I could be dissapointed and let down massively, but I was not very much over all. I did my best I could not do more. And climb her arse was not the way for me.

So , Bank the clocks ticking...


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

Zstanmore said:


> youre right, dont let her SLIP OF YOUR GRASP!
> 
> This reminds me myself in your age /now Im 29.
> Whatever you come up with just do it before is too late. I have missed some opportunities with terific girl which I knew she liked me and waited for my move. I still keep bashing myself for it! I wish I found courage that time.
> ...


you're absolutely right Zstanmore. 3 more days and we'll see what she says. i'm determined to ask her - my s/a wont stop me - i'm not afraid if people laugh at me for failing, but i am afraid of the fact that she could turn me down because it will be disappointing if she does.


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## Jef (Jan 8, 2012)

Zstanmore, I like your story  I got annoyed about myself too not asking and talking to girls that were showing some sympathy (pretty ones too, that's irritating). So I'll be learning from Banks's lesson too


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## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

Sounds good man, I'm in a similar position myself at the moment. You should totally go talk to her after class, get body contact going, just a playful nudge or brushing against her when you're walking and say something funny. Let the chemistry do the work!

Don't overthink/plan it. If she already likes you which it sounds like she does, then it doesn't really matter what you say as long as the vibe is good.

Good luck!


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

JimmyDeansRetartedCousin said:


> Sounds good man, I'm in a similar position myself at the moment. You should totally go talk to her after class, get body contact going, just a playful nudge or brushing against her when you're walking and say something funny. Let the chemistry do the work!
> 
> Don't overthink/plan it. If she already likes you which it sounds like she does, then it doesn't really matter what you say as long as the vibe is good.
> 
> Good luck!


yeah! i was thinking of nudging her on the shoulder after saying an inside joke that only she would understand. i'm definitely going to talk to her after class - the suspense is killing me, i can't wait. ahhh two more days. thanks for wishing me luck and giving me some advice JimmyDeansretardedcousin (i like your name). and Jef thanks for your input. I'll be keeping everyone up to date on what happens. Hopefully my story continues past the first stage (asking her out) and i can share what its like to be in a relationship with s/a haha.


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

today is the day my friends - wish me luck!!! i'll let you know what happened later.


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## Subwolf (Feb 1, 2012)

Best of luck to you.:banana


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## falco (Jun 1, 2011)

Good luck! Congrats of having courage to do this :clap


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## Whatev (Feb 6, 2012)

Good luck!


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## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

Good luck man


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

she has a boyfriend... and he has the same name as me. AHHHHHH THE PAIN. theres got to be a way around this... any thoughts guys?


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## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

Banks said:


> she has a boyfriend... and he has the same name as me. AHHHHHH THE PAIN. theres got to be a way around this... any thoughts guys?


No harm in befriending her anyway, a lot of relationships don't last forever. Just keep the tone the same, and remember it's okay to flirt! it's what people do. Just don't ask her out, or hit on her over zealously in public/or private depending on how you feel about that.

Life is just pain interspersed with long periods of boredom and the occasional orgasm, and then you die. So you might as well have fun

Same name, haha that's happened to me once too, until I went to far with the casual incest jokes and she stopped talking to me.

Fail.


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## Subwolf (Feb 1, 2012)

Banks said:


> she has a boyfriend... and he has the same name as me. AHHHHHH THE PAIN. theres got to be a way around this... any thoughts guys?


I'm sorry to hear that but you're still a winner for having the courage to ask her out.


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## Banks (Jan 12, 2012)

I know she's into me and now that this boyfriend is in the picture I haven't won yet. There has to be something I can do to shift the tides in my favor... I also feel like I can't get enough contact with her in class once a week. I need to be able to see her outside of class to improve our connection. If I could just bring her into my world I could totally win her over. I want to text her and see if she still wants to get coffee but as friends or something. i just need a chance where i have all her attention on me.


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