# Is it bad to care more about video games than real life?



## MoonlitMadness (Mar 11, 2013)

So, I love RPGs.. I just finished Final Fantasy X for the third time. And of course I had a little cry over the ending lol. I feel way more involved with video games (and certain TV series) than I do in real life. When I'm with friends or at work I just want to be back at home on my PS2. I wish real life could have the kind of love that Tidus and Yuna have! 

I think I'm losing touch with reality more and more. I should be looking for a job and making friends or looking for a gf/bf, but all I aspire to do is complete more RPGs! Last night I went out and fell out with this girl I'm seeing, and one of my friends.. I feel really alone and yet at the same time I don't know how much I care? I can't be bothered to talk to people anymore it seems.. But I don't want to be a loser who does nothing but plays video games, what would people think of me? :/ What do I do? I need more friends but I'm losing them.


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## Phalene (Feb 15, 2013)

I had a moment like this when I was younger. Since it's okay. Like you I love some video games and TV series etc but I also realized that when I get older, I will regret spending so much time caring about virtual entertainment instead of improving myself or meeting with people or volunteering or learning things.

In the end it's not what people think of you that matters, it's what you think of yourself. People come and go in your life, you won't


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

MoonlitMadness said:


> So, I love RPGs.. I just finished Final Fantasy X for the third time. And of course I had a little cry over the ending lol. I feel way more involved with video games (and certain TV series) than I do in real life. When I'm with friends or at work I just want to be back at home on my PS2. I wish real life could have the kind of love that Tidus and Yuna have!
> 
> I think I'm losing touch with reality more and more. I should be looking for a job and making friends or looking for a gf/bf, but all I aspire to do is complete more RPGs! Last night I went out and fell out with this girl I'm seeing, and one of my friends.. I feel really alone and yet at the same time I don't know how much I care? I can't be bothered to talk to people anymore it seems.. But I don't want to be a loser who does nothing but plays video games, what would people think of me? :/ What do I do? I need more friends but I'm losing them.


It's all about balance. There's nothing wrong with being into a hobby - we all need something that we enjoy, something we can unwind to. But you can't neglect your responsibilities or reality.


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## Miyu (Mar 10, 2013)

I'm the same way. video games and books are a huge huge part of my life. (just got Tales of Xillia on friday ...... such a moment of joy!!!! :clap:clap)

I've completely lost the interest to talk to people, unless we have many things in common. my parents always talk about "acquintances" (bet I misspelled that) that they occasionally see, go to drink with and then don't see for months ... and they don't have anything in common much, other than that meeting every once in a few and having small talk. I absolutely can't imagine doing that ... if I don't have things in common in "details" ... like, reading similar books or being interested in similar things ... even without SA, I wouldn't really bother past being polite to them. (it's not like they care much about talking to me either, so ...)

hope I didn't come over as rude, I AM polite to people, I listen when they talk, it's just ...

well, I certainly hope for you (and for me too) that you find friends with similar interests, cause I totally think that's just the best thing ever. having someone to obsess over video games and other geeky stuff with? heaven!!! and then you have friends and at the same time you can enjoy video games and share the joy!!! but I wouldn't know, have been searching for someone like that around here for all my life.  still do.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

Understandable, but _so_ unhealthy.

Games and fantasy won't be there for you in the end. Reality will eventually catch up with you, and when it does, it's the 'real life' relationships and connections that you'll need.

How to teach yourself to really appreciate this, I'm not sure... haven't yet figured it out, myself.

In the meantime, games and such are quite the wonderful distraction, aren't they. Oh yes, I do like escapism...


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## Richard Pawgins (Jul 11, 2013)

Video games, Films, Music, Literature, Art, Religion, Sports etc...


they're all forms of escapism and there's nothing wrong with indulging especially if you think that real life sucks or is boring.


Escapism is needed in order to live a sane and healthy life IMO


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## creasy (Oct 29, 2012)

If games are such a staple of your life, then you might as well try to do something productive with them. Pursue a career in the industry, set up a twitch channel, make youtube videos, write articles. Something like that.


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## Richard Pawgins (Jul 11, 2013)

creasy said:


> If games are such a staple of your life, then you might as well try to do something productive with them. Pursue a career in the industry, set up a twitch channel, make youtube videos, write articles. Something like that.


why though?

most people go to the movie theater a few times a month.....Do you suggest that they also join the film industry in some way shape or form?


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## MoonlitMadness (Mar 11, 2013)

Richard Pawgins said:


> why though?
> 
> most people go to the movie theater a few times a month.....Do you suggest that they also join the film industry in some way shape or form?


I think it's a good idea actually, and I don't play video games a few times a month lol, I play them pretty much every day if I can  And I DO want to find a place for myself in the video game industry.. I just don't know what sort of role would suit someone with a degree in English Literature!!


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## MoonlitMadness (Mar 11, 2013)

Miyu said:


> I'm the same way. video games and books are a huge huge part of my life. (just got Tales of Xillia on friday ...... such a moment of joy!!!! :clap:clap)
> 
> I've completely lost the interest to talk to people, unless we have many things in common. my parents always talk about "acquintances" (bet I misspelled that) that they occasionally see, go to drink with and then don't see for months ... and they don't have anything in common much, other than that meeting every once in a few and having small talk. I absolutely can't imagine doing that ... if I don't have things in common in "details" ... like, reading similar books or being interested in similar things ... even without SA, I wouldn't really bother past being polite to them. (it's not like they care much about talking to me either, so ...)
> 
> ...


Yeah that's a big part of it, maybe if I had friends who I had more in common with.. I do have one or two online friends who like games like I do, but I would love to have someone like that in "real life". None of those friends like the things I do, even our personalities don't connect that well. Maybe if I had the sort of friends you describe I wouldn't spend so much time playing video games. Well actually I would lol, there's just something about them that quenches something inside of me that nothing in reality does. I mean I'm quite detached in real life but games make me tear up.. lol. I hope you can find a video game loving friend lol


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## Corvus Cowl (Apr 25, 2012)

MoonlitMadness said:


> I think it's a good idea actually, and I don't play video games a few times a month lol, I play them pretty much every day if I can  And I DO want to find a place for myself in the video game industry.. I just don't know what sort of role would suit someone with a degree in English Literature!!


If you're good at writing stories, why not become a writer for games? Or even make novels out of game's lore (similar to how there are novels of the Halo universe that are not even games). You could start with practicing writing fanfics of your favorite game lore and posting it on the internet, and then put together a portfolio of your work.

As for the main topic at hand, I too prefer the fantasy of games over the reality of life, and to be honest, who doesn't? In gaming, it is so much easier to obtain what we are looking for to make us happy (rewards, recognition, wealth, power, love, destruction, revenge, peace), but in reality it is so much harder to obtain such goals, and just as easy to lose them. In gaming, we can choose our paths we want to walk on, and we can do so in reality, but reality is a path with a lot of hills and mountains to traverse with those obstacles being much more steep for some compared to others.

But just like a video game, if you work on getting better at reality, those rewards and paths become just a bit easier to obtain and complete. After all, you can't get better at a game if you just leave the controller there alone with the game on; you have to play it to not only experience it but to actually practice and hopefully get good at it. Reality is a game that can be played differently for everyone, so through trial and error one can find their own play-style to get through it


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## MoonlitMadness (Mar 11, 2013)

creasy said:


> If games are such a staple of your life, then you might as well try to do something productive with them. Pursue a career in the industry, set up a twitch channel, make youtube videos, write articles. Something like that.


I've had zero motivation to do anything for a while now, but today it's coming back a little  I used to love writing. Does anyone know what a good blog site to start writing my own blog?? I want to make a video game blog and get loads of views, yayyyy DDDDDD


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## creasy (Oct 29, 2012)

Richard Pawgins said:


> why though?


...Because it will allow her to do something productive related to and fueled by her passion, benefiting himself and the community.



Richard Pawgins said:


> most people go to the movie theater a few times a month.....Do you suggest that they also join the film industry in some way shape or form?


I can't even tell if you're being serious. Going to the theater a few times a month is not on the same level of ignoring relationships and personal responsibilities so you can play video games every day.

Now if someone had to go watch every new release in the theater and was always thinking about movies, then yes I'd suggest that they use that passion to better their lives and the lives of others instead of just watching movies and doing nothing else with it.


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## creasy (Oct 29, 2012)

MoonlitMadness said:


> I've had zero motivation to do anything for a while now, but today it's coming back a little  I used to love writing. Does anyone know what a good blog site to start writing my own blog?? I want to make a video game blog and get loads of views, yayyyy DDDDDD


I don't know anything about setting up a blog, but if you just wanna do some game related writing, try writing reviews for your favorites games, or if you're knowledgeable enough, walkthroughs and submit them to GameFAQS.

Or fanfiction if you want.


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## Richard Pawgins (Jul 11, 2013)

creasy said:


> ...Because it will allow her to do something productive related to and fueled by her passion, benefiting himself and the community.
> 
> I can't even tell if you're being serious. Going to the theater a few times a month is not on the same level of ignoring relationships and personal responsibilities so you can play video games every day.
> 
> Now if someone had to go watch every new release in the theater and was always thinking about movies, then yes I'd suggest that they use that passion to better their lives and the lives of others instead of just watching movies and doing nothing else with it.


she has S.A so her reasons for ignoring relationships and socializing doesn't have anything to do with playing video games so you're not making any sense.


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## thevandal (Aug 12, 2013)

MoonlitMadness said:


> So, I love RPGs.. I just finished Final Fantasy X for the third time. And of course I had a little cry over the ending lol. I feel way more involved with video games (and certain TV series) than I do in real life. When I'm with friends or at work I just want to be back at home on my PS2. I wish real life could have the kind of love that Tidus and Yuna have!
> 
> I think I'm losing touch with reality more and more. I should be looking for a job and making friends or looking for a gf/bf, but all I aspire to do is complete more RPGs! Last night I went out and fell out with this girl I'm seeing, and one of my friends.. I feel really alone and yet at the same time I don't know how much I care? I can't be bothered to talk to people anymore it seems.. But I don't want to be a loser who does nothing but plays video games, what would people think of me? :/ What do I do? I need more friends but I'm losing them.


Video games are a great escape but real life is more important. I have been playing video games since I was 8 years old. I am now 33. lol I still play em but real life is definitely more important. It's good to get outside.


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## Vaust (Feb 12, 2012)

Play a MMO. That way you can play video games AND have friends!


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## NerfherderSheWrote (Jul 30, 2013)

It's best to take anything escapist in moderation, otherwise real-world problems don't get solved.

BUT, I will make something of a case for video games. A video game is an experience, moreso than a book or a movie. It's better to spend $60 for a new experience than $60 for a new _thing_ you just _own_, like a model of the Starship Enterprise or something.


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## Lain (Oct 5, 2011)

no, real life is boring anyway


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## Tabris (Jul 14, 2013)

Lain said:


> no, real life is boring anyway


Heh, agreed.

Also, FFX is excellent :clap
One of my favourites.


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

Not really, I used to be like this.
...then I got back into anime and man, I hate real life even more now x__x


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## Str (Jun 4, 2013)

I don't know if it's a good idea to change your favorite hobby into a job. It means your goal is suddenly to make enough money to live, which can go at the expense of the authenticity of your work. But most of all, it can turn into something you _have _to do instead of something you _want _to do, because you can't just stop whenever you feel like it.


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## ineverwipe (Jun 16, 2013)

Nah real life is garbage


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## Devon91 (Jul 21, 2013)

Nope, as I always say "I am a gamer, not because I have no life, but because I have many"....Perhaps try to make like minded friends and that way you can find a bf and be "social"


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

RPGs are overall just an escape for me. Playing them is cathartic for my anxious/depressive emotions, inspiring for the creative part of me aspiring to be a writer/musician/artist, and entertaining for the part of me that is constantly bored by the logic and groundedness of real life. 

In moderation, videogames are fantastic. I won't lie, sometimes they become such a huge part of my priorities that my thoughts are filled with playthroughs of my favorite cutscenes, indulgent headcanons, ideas for new environments in the last game I was playing. I've even had quite a few dreams consisting of playing through a game. 

But there comes a point where we must distinguish reality and fantasy. We recognize that continuing to live in the fantasy world of videogames has no real effect on reality (unless you're a videogame tester for a living) except passing time and influencing your mood minimally. Unless your goal is to sit around and play videogames for the rest of your life, you need to prioritize goals set in reality. Of course, there are ways to ease into these real life goals, and you can integrate your love for RPGs with reality (i.e. make friends with others who play videogames).

Side note: FFX is amazing.


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