# Self Harm



## missnat84 (Dec 31, 2004)

How many of you self harm if you think you've embarassed yourself in a social situation?

Whenever i make a mistake(which is quite often)and do/say something stupid,i bite myself on the arms really hard or dig something sharp into my skin. Sometimes its the only thing that calms me down :fall


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## PGVan (May 22, 2004)

This is the one thing about depression that I truly don't understand. I accidently cut my hand with a bread knife last night, and it hurt and stung like f'ing hell. There's no way I could intentionally cut myself.


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## emptybottle (Jan 3, 2005)

I scratch myself in the arms with something sharp, but not deep enough for it to bleed or scar or anything. Sometimes I even slap myself while cursing myself out.


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## JohnnyEnnui (Jul 10, 2005)

I don't do that but can understand that physical pain can sometimes be easier to tolerate (or can be a distraction from) emotional pain - in your case, embarassment. I'm sorry you feel so bad. Do you have anyone to talk to, like a therapist, the next time you feel the need to harm yourself, to prevent yourself from doing so? Maybe, if somebody listened to how you felt, you would no longer feel the need to do this to yourself.


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## Maike (Sep 29, 2004)

I understand as well, along with biting the skin around my fingernails, sometimes until they bleed, I just keep telling myself that I'm an idiot/pathetic/whatever


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## Maike (Sep 29, 2004)

PGVan said:


> This is the one thing about depression that I truly don't understand. I accidently cut my hand with a bread knife last night, and it hurt and stung like f'ing hell. There's no way I could intentionally cut myself.


I know what you're saying, of course it hurts. I've never taken a blade or anything and cut myself cos I'm a wuss when it comes to pain, I nevert considered myself a self-harmer. But I was reading that apparently any sort of skin picking that you do to 'calm' yourself down or in response to stress/emotional turmoil, etc, is considered self-harming, also digging into your skin...sometimes I just pinch myself really hard with my nails, it's very weird, it's like it channels my anger and I can calm down


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## Guest (Sep 2, 2005)

Have done it yes. When i was deeply depressed or after social situations with extreme anxiety. Cut myself with razor blades or burn myself with a cigarette. With my psychologist i came to a conclusion that i do it because of my deep self-hate after the social situations where i try to control my anxiety (that of course only makes it worse...). 
Something like SOC. SITUATION -> ANXIETY -> ANOTHER BAD EXPERIENCE 
AFTER WHICH... -> SELF PITY -> HATE MYSELF AND WANT TO DIE.
Well good thing im over this ****. Just embarassed when i have to explain the scars to people.


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## opivy22 (Mar 1, 2005)

I read a paper a while back about SSRIs being used to stop self injury in autistic children. The point the paper made was that injuries makes the body release serotonin and medication could often be used to prevent the child from injuring themself in the first place.


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## androgyne (Aug 4, 2005)

I bite myself (often to the point of drawing blood) when I'm upset in some way. (be it depressed, embarrassed, what have you). I also sometimes take nonlethal overdoses when I'm upset.


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## missnat84 (Dec 31, 2004)

I try not to do it but if im feeling really bad and embarassed about something i did then in the end its the only thing that makes me feel better


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## JohnnyEnnui (Jul 10, 2005)

Can you write out your feelings when you feel bad, instead of harming yourself - not just your feelings of embarrassment but your rage? I mean, you must feel really angry about your SA. Maybe, write down everyone you're mad at for having it: "I hate God for giving me SA. I hate every piece of **** on this ****ing planet that doesn't understand me"...including me, for giving you this advice. Sorry, I know when my therapist tells me to write things out, I usually am too upset to do so. I just wish you didn't have to take your feeling embarrassed out on yourself. It's not your fault that you have SA. Maybe, you could write out your positive qualities to remind you that you're a good person, instead of or in addition to writing out your rage. And if you do decide to try to write, it would be good if you have someone you trust to show it to later. That way you wouldn't feel alone or that your writing is pointless. I hope you feel better.

P.S. Writing is an action, just like harming yourself is an action, so maybe you could replace the self-destructive one with a more positive one.

P.P.S. Or you could post right here every time you feel like harming yourself. Maybe, start a "triumph" thread and write: "I feel like harming myself, but I'm not going to and am posting this instead...(and whatever else you want to say).


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## missnat84 (Dec 31, 2004)

JohnnyEnnui said:


> Can you write out your feelings when you feel bad, instead of harming yourself - not just your feelings of embarrassment but your rage? I mean, you must feel really angry about your SA. Maybe, write down everyone you're mad at for having it: "I hate God for giving me SA. I hate every piece of @#%$ on this @#%$ planet that doesn't understand me"...including me, for giving you this advice. Sorry, I know when my therapist tells me to write things out, I usually am too upset to do so. I just wish you didn't have to take your feeling embarrassed out on yourself. It's not your fault that you have SA. Maybe, you could write out your positive qualities to remind you that you're a good person, instead of or in addition to writing out your rage. And if you do decide to try to write, it would be good if you have someone you trust to show it to later. That way you wouldn't feel alone or that your writing is pointless. I hope you feel better.


Thanks Johnny,i was thinking about that today actually-writing down how i feel etc. My anxiety is pretty bad and i feel as though im always making mistakes and cant do anything right. I have alot of self hatred that i cant see any good in myself and so then i punish myself for my mistakes and anxiety,i know i need to find a way of stopping myself from doing it because scars will always be reminders :afr


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## JohnnyEnnui (Jul 10, 2005)

I'm glad you're going to pursue an alternative to punishing yourself.


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## mserychic (Oct 2, 2004)

I have a arm full of scars to show just how much I hate me. My therapist chic gave me some alternatives for me to try when I'm feeling super down like that. Holding ice or taking a freezing cold shower since it's still a shock to yr system. Beating the hell out of a punching bag or just exercising. Think there were more but I don't remember.. but those seem to help a lil


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## Black (Sep 3, 2005)

i have other qustion
any body here try to use the pain to law the pressure?
i mean in the time that you with pepole to put somthing hurt wich anyone els cant see it?
and if you do i realy want to know if its help to law down the pressure


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## missnat84 (Dec 31, 2004)

Black said:


> i have other qustion
> any body here try to use the pain to law the pressure?
> i mean in the time that you with pepole to put somthing hurt wich anyone els cant see it?
> and if you do i realy want to know if its help to law down the pressure


When im in a social situation and i feel as though i said something stupid/embarassing myself, then i usually bite the inside of my mouth or dig into my arms with my nails. The more i embarass myself -the higher the anxiety but hurting myself helps me focus on that more, instead of what i just said/did.


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## Black (Sep 3, 2005)

missnat84 said:


> Black said:
> 
> 
> > i have other qustion
> ...


))):
no no i know that feeling but this is not what i ment! i ment did you try to hurt yourself while you with pepole???? i meant i agianst hurtting myself at any way bu i mean if the pain will be big pepole see that you pain and suffer alitlle mybe but they will not think ans sence it because of them, i think mybe(just mybe)the pain can make us forget about the pressure and i mean while we with pepole in the same time ,for example(just example that you know what i mean)to put nail in your shoes while youi with pepole i realy reealy wan tto know if sombody here ever try it


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## DemonicSass (Mar 7, 2016)

I myself am utterly terrified of blood... But I will still catch myself doing things that are physically harmful as a very unhealthy anxiety tic. Like I never ever cut or burn myself, but I will pick nervously at my skin until I bleed and scar, or I dig my nails into my skin to keep my hands from shaking.


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## SaladDays (Nov 26, 2013)

mother of necros this is a relic from an older time...

I hope OP is doing better now, kind of sad to see a thread like this and that OP hasn't logged in sas since 2007 =/


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

Yeah, another thread brought back from the dead. Why do people do this? I will never understand....lmao


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## TheSilentGamer (Nov 15, 2014)

TenYears said:


> Yeah, another thread brought back from the dead. Why do people do this? I will never understand....lmao


Haha, people hurting themselves is not funny.

And trust me, we don't really know either. It just feels... right? I guess? Your brain just tells you to do it.


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## Kovu (Jun 18, 2013)

Yeah I've had really bad days that when I get home I cut my left arm.


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## Russalka (Feb 13, 2016)

I went through a really rough time when I was younger and used to purposely cut arms with my razor. The first time I did it without really thinking, it just sort of happened. It was my only way to deal with what I was feeling at the time. Luckily the scars have faded away already


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## Constellations (Sep 23, 2013)

It happens less since I have no school/job, I get to stay at home and away from others. I don't feel the urge to do so nowadays.


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

TheSilentGamer said:


> Haha, people hurting themselves is not funny.
> 
> And trust me, we don't really know either. It just feels... right? I guess? Your brain just tells you to do it.


Uhm.....yeah.....self-harm is def not funny. I was suggesting that it's funny that people revive these old threads...from years ago. I think I made that pretty clear


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## Crisigv (Aug 3, 2013)

I have thought about trying it, if it can be some kind of release. It seems to work for others. But I think maybe it's not worth it, I'd rather be depressed than injured.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

No.


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

I used to do it quite a bit, for years actually. I haven't in a while, though. I have a whole lot of scars from burning and cutting...its not worth it. It's a release, it seems to help for a while but it really doesn't do anything to alleviate the real pain and suffering.

This is actually a good link. I use some of these sometimes....

http://www.socialanxietysupport.com...ger-warning-183993/index5.html#post1059980581


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Not sure if this type of thread is allowed or not but.....

I'm 10wks clean, the longest I've been in a year. Most of my scars will remain for life. Sucks when people see them and you have to explain yourself when you have already put it behind you. Seeing new doctors is the worse. So awkward. Looking back I'm like what was I thinking. Severe depression sucks.


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## TheSilentGamer (Nov 15, 2014)

TenYears said:


> Uhm.....yeah.....self-harm is def not funny. I was suggesting that it's funny that people revive these old threads...from years ago. I think I made that pretty clear


Whoops, I guess I misunderstood you. Sorry 'bout that. :serious:


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

TheSilentGamer said:


> Whoops, I guess I misunderstood you. Sorry 'bout that. :serious:


No problem  I just hope the OP is alright. I actually responded to this thread yesterday, then deleted it because I realized the original post was from almost 11 years ago lol. I do hope they're OK though.


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## LydeaCharlotteGirl (Aug 27, 2013)

This thread may be really old, but self-harm discussion is not allowed.

Suicide and Self-Mutilation
If you are currently thinking about harming or killing yourself _please seek help immediately_. On the forums, suicide threats and the discussion of suicide is not permitted. Discussion of self-mutilation (cutting and burning) is not permitted except in the context of coping mechanisms in the following thread: _Self harm coping mechanisms (Trigger Warning)_. On your personal blog, sharing your feelings is fine, but please do not share means or plans of suicide or self-mutilation.


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