# coming to this site or any SA site. Does it help you or hurt you?



## bowlingpins (Oct 18, 2008)

In terms of your SA, has it improved or worsened by being online here?


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## livinginfear (Jan 31, 2009)

It helps only in the sense that I don't feel as alone in it when I see so many others dealing with the same kind of stuff. There was a time when I had no idea that what was wrong with me had a name and was something that other people had too and knew about.


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## finster (Jul 5, 2007)

This comes up alot on here.

For me, it's great to know I'm not the only one with this, and to see how others are coping.

But it can be sad and depressing to read discouraging post after discouraging post.

I voted 'helps a little'.


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## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

Helps waste time, has no effect on SA.


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

Doesn't really affect me either way.


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## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

Hurts a lot, because I like the way it sounds


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

It doesn't affect my SA at all. It does affect my depression though, I've noticed. Sometimes I'll feel better after being on here because I can relate to things people have said or because it provided a distraction from my sad life. Other times I'll feel worse because it reminds me of how alone I am.


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

I find that giving advice or offering suggestions regarding positive thinking or otherwise helps get my own thoughts in order. It makes me more reflective on ways to help myself and therefore reinforces my newer positive habits.


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## Neptunus (Oct 29, 2007)

Misery likes company. Helps a lot.


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## Freedom2010 (Jan 29, 2009)

It actually helped a little. Reading about people overcoming their SA and the way they overcome it can be pretty inspiring. It shows you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. 

This website actually gave me the idea of getting a part time job in order to overcome my shyness and meet new people. I don't know whether I would have had that idea if I hadn't been on this website. It is possible, but I love my new job and that job is changing my life


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## N3XT2NON3 (Aug 10, 2009)

Hurts a little. too few success stories. i wanna get more insight onto actually beating this.

just being honest


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## ippa (Jul 21, 2009)

i would like there be another option, "helps a little and hurts alot" or something, i stoped reading "frustration" and "coping with sa" forums after i "hooked" other person fears and they became mine and my sa got much worse, so i fear to read such posts, no offense just saying what happened to me, but triumphs and positive thinking forums are great.


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## saillias (Oct 5, 2008)

If you read the Coping With Social Anxiety and Frustration forums, it will hurt.

If you find the helpful posters and topics, and go to positive thinking, and make goals, it will help


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## Toad Licker (Nov 2, 2007)

I think when I first joined it helped some but now that the honeymoon is over...


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

Mostly neutral.. I go through bouts where it helps 'a little'..


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## ShyViolet (Nov 11, 2003)

Sometimes it helps a little, sometimes it hurts a little.


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## dreamer222 (Jan 26, 2008)

Helps a little. Sometimes I'll go on here after a rough day of school, read a few posts, and be reminded that there actually are people like myself out there. This boosts my mood a lot.


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## Witan (Jun 13, 2009)

I didn't vote, because it can do both (depending on my mood). On the one hand, hearing about people going through the same stuff I am makes me feel not so alone. On the other hand, hearing about people going through the same stuff I am makes me depressed.


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## Steve123 (Sep 13, 2009)

I don't know yet, just registered to my first one today. Though I have already found it nice to know I'm not the only one with my problem, particularly with regards to being a late bloomer.


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## _AJ_ (Jan 23, 2008)

helps meet people who i can meet in person and try and overcome sa with. also provides all the latest techniques and ideas. also provides a place to post your progress and get praise and feedback.

without a doubt: _Helps a lot_


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## Yverinrey (Jun 21, 2008)

It personally helps me feel better about having SA and knowing there are others who go through this.

Does it make me perform better in social situations? Nope. I hope to make friends on here that I can try to meet up with IRL though. I wish I knew more people I could talk to face to face that could have the patience to help me overcome this (offering to go someplace with them, invite me to their house, etc).


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## ShyFX (Mar 6, 2006)

ShyViolet said:


> Sometimes it helps a little, sometimes it hurts a little.


Same.



saillias said:


> If you read the Coping With Social Anxiety and Frustration forums, it will hurt.


Surprisingly those forums don't really bring me down. Now the relationship forum on the other hand..


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## _AJ_ (Jan 23, 2008)

check out the triumphs forum, the positive forum and the goal setting forum

those are my favorite. those are the most helpful ones


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

I'm grateful for meeting my girlfriend on this site, but other than that coming here is a waste of time(or a time waster).


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## dullard (Aug 4, 2008)

I have found that it has helped me but maybe not in the way intended. I haven't really taken advantage of the support aspect but reading through and talking to people has provided a fair amount of motivation for me. I found myself sitting in all the time and doing nothing, always avoiding. Seeing others in the same situation for years on end pushed me to get out and live a little.


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## Still Waters (Sep 18, 2008)

Not sure how to answer that. At first I felt overwhelming relief and gratitude for finding this site. - I still do,unfortunately I've found that even here,SA utopia,it's really hard to make connections. Just knowing that others feel this constant ache is a bit soothing,I just constantly wish I could meet some of my "people" in real life. This always feels a little like second best or better than nothing. I think it's all about keeping it in perspective which is rather difficult to do when you have so little else in your life.


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## steelmyhead (May 31, 2009)

Probably worsened slightly. There are other things that have helped much more. The thing I really need is "life experience", and this site can't really offer that.


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## veron (Apr 29, 2009)

Neither helps nor hurts


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## Sunrisesunset (Jun 12, 2009)

Neutral.

Helps-I see others understand what I'm going through, so I don't feel so alone.

Hurts-I see others understand what I'm going through, so I'm reminded of what's 'wrong' with my life.


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## DuncanThaw (Jun 19, 2009)

I voted "helps a little" because I think it is more helpful than hurtful, though it is certainly a bit of both.

It helps to be able to read of others' experiences, though I'm not yet at a point where I really feel able to contribute meaningfully. I appreciate being able to read of new perspectives, so that I'm not stuck in the same circular ruts that I get myself into on my own in attempting to deal with SA and other issues. Unrelated to SA, this site is also my primary source at the moment for unofficial film/book/TV recommendations.  My interactions in "real" life are limited to my boyfriend (who is also my dearest friend), a close friend and then people who aren't so close (co-workers, family, etc.), so it is nice to feel less isolated. It seems to make my brain work a little better, or feel more flexible, to interact even minimally with people here.

On the negative side, it reinforces the idea that I'm not very likeable even in a welcoming environment; it forces me to see that I'm very deficient in personality and intellectual development compared to my peers. In a way that is good, though, because it can help motivate me to improve. I also spend too much time editing or deleting posts, which is a tremendous waste of time.


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## anomalous (Jun 12, 2004)

Voted neutral. But if anything, it may hurt a little. In real life, I see myself as by far the most socially inept of anyone I know, and I think that's a fairly accurate perception. The despair that accompanies that realization can occasionally serve as motivation to change and better myself (though not often). Then I come on here and see that so many others are dealing with the same issues, and it makes me feel halfway normal, as if maybe I'm not so freakishly bad the way I am. Hell, maybe that's a good thing though. After years of inner turmoil, I've still yet to decide whether pushing hard to change or accepting how I am now is in my better long-term interest.


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## Anna (Sep 24, 2009)

hey i found a thread to answer my question. hurts a little.



saillias said:


> If you read the Coping With Social Anxiety and Frustration forums, it will hurt.
> 
> If you find the helpful posters and topics, and go to positive thinking, and make goals, it will help


this is good advice for me to take.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Yeah I try to stick to the positive threads but at the same time I like helping people so I will go into frustration every so often. Overall this place has been good to me though, I have met some seriously awesome people who I hope to meet in person one day.


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## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

Once upon a time I thought it helped.


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## nightrain (Nov 17, 2008)

Coming to this site helps me a lot! I've made a lot of friends on here, including my best friend


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## ecotec83 (Sep 7, 2009)

Voted helps a bit. Seeing that others are going through similar has helped me feel less alone and has helped me better understand my own feelings and experiences with SA. The positive advice and success stories that some members have posted make me realize that it can be beaten.


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## DSPFrat (Aug 2, 2009)

I put neither, seeing all the depressing "my life sucks" posts doesn't make me feel any better, other then the fact that I see people who seem worse off than me.


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## Emerald3 (Sep 17, 2009)

It helps me, by talking about it and knowing I'm not alone. But hinders because it's not pushing me to sort/get rid of SA. 


So both really.


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## mind_games (Nov 30, 2008)

Overall SAS right now 'helps a little'.


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## quietgal (Oct 18, 2007)

As others have said it helped me more in the beginning when I was just learning about SA and hearing what other people had to say about it, but a lot of the issues I have just can't be resolved by talking to people on a forum. There have been some interesting discussions though, and people on this forum are generally friendly - that's always nice to see...


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