# Is it bad if I want my psychologist to be female/young?



## ruinMYlife (Nov 23, 2008)

The reason is because I am out of the f***ing loop when it comes to the outside world and WOMEN. I need to straight up ask a young female psychologist (that is a part of modern society) what negatives/positives do you notice about me? Stuff like that.

Is that bad? Should I just not even bother? I never considered seeing a psychologist ever in my life but it's just at this moment that I'm considering it.


----------



## mike91 (Sep 23, 2012)

I really dont think they will ponit out your negatives that not there job i requested to see a mature psychologist it would feel werid talking to a young person about my anxiety and depression


----------



## Paul (Sep 26, 2005)

It's a waste of your time. Every young female has different preferences and you won't know if hers are common, and you can't date your psychologist, so what she likes/dislikes about you doesn't matter. Also it sounds like what you're looking for is more of a dating coach than a psychologist, so you should look for that, they do exist.


----------



## AllTheSame (Mar 19, 2016)

I think you need to concentrate on who you're going to be more comfortable talking to. I mean when **** gets real, when you start digging into the real issues, when your therapist goes "there". To that topic you don't want to talk about. Who are you going to be more comfortable with. 

I usually (not always) pick women because women have been my friends mostly, for most all of my life....I've had guy friends oc but I just figure my chances are probably better at getting along with a female psychiatrist, and a female therapist and right now I have both. I just open up more easily to women, Idk why. I think you just have to figure out what works for you (and why....don't pick a woman for the wrong reasons).


----------



## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

ruinMYlife said:


> The reason is because I am out of the f***ing loop when it comes to the outside world and WOMEN. I need to straight up ask a young female psychologist (that is a part of modern society) what negatives/positives do you notice about me? Stuff like that.
> 
> Is that bad? Should I just not even bother? I never considered seeing a psychologist ever in my life but it's just at this moment that I'm considering it.


What do you want to find out - if you come across as awkward or whatever?

I think if you want to start seeing a therapist then I'd concentrate on finding one you're comfortable talking to. Find one you can be completely honest with - also one that's hopefully intelligent and has a vague idea what they're doing. (that last part will probably be tricky in my experience)


----------



## a degree of freedom (Sep 28, 2011)

If that's who you're more comfortable talking to, then try that. I have a mild preference for younger psychologists because they're often a little more energetic and happy to experiment and have you try different things than just vanilla talk therapy. If I have a gender bias though it's very weak. I've known really good male and female psychologists and every one of them has a different personality and approach that may or may not be particularly therapeutic for you.

But like others are saying, no one is going to tell you what they see wrong with you, though they may help you explore your frustration or insecurity in a way that you may find them a bit of an anchor in the chaos, and you may come to some peace about the matter that "knowing" what's "wrong" with you could never accomplish. It's only something to torment yourself with, which isn't something to be eager for.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

do you want a therapist or a potential mate?


----------



## emillarson (Aug 19, 2016)

Stop being so scared its nothing bad a therapist its there to help you .And you will speak with her you will find many interest things about yourself ,its help you and its give you also confidence


----------



## Sliusarek (Aug 14, 2016)

You`re not going to a candy shop. Why do you care, how old they are?


----------



## Antonio9 (Sep 6, 2016)

Nah it would only be bad if the reason you wanted to, is because you want to have a fling with them or some****.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## zomb (May 4, 2014)

Mine Was female and young, just a couple years older than me. Very petite too. Anyways I'm getting a new one soon.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Adversid (Mar 21, 2013)

You don't need to see a psychologist to ask them what they think of you.

I don't think a psychologist is trained to make value judgments of people anyways.


----------



## Mr A (Oct 7, 2015)

No not really, I was the same for a while, I just wanted to be 'noticed' in a positive light by a female around my age who actually believed in me. Regardless I would avoid getting a psycologist for two reasons anyway:

1. Most of them are covert narcissists who don't give a ****.
2. You'll just be another patient to her.
3. Some charge extortionate prices.
4. They do little to help anyway.


----------



## SwtSurrender (Nov 24, 2014)

Wow, you're very smart! What a great idea! I should have done the same! A young man about my age, my my, but to me, I think I would have experienced alot way more anxiety with this kind of.... Well, my choice was always an older woman or an older man.

But yes, I think you should do it!


----------

