# What Schemas Do you have?



## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

If you want to know what your schemas are, use the questionnaire attached. Instructions in the document. For more info, go to http://www.schematherapy.com

*There are 75 questions to answer*

If you want to know how to work on these schemas, you can begin to help yourself by buying *Reiventing Your Life by Klosko and Young*. Its on Amazon. There is FAR TOO MUCH DETAIL for me to post on how to help individual people, especially as the schemas, coping responses and modes are different for EVERYONE. There is no 'general' method like in CBT - it has to fit YOU. Thats why YOU use the book, or a therapist tailors therapy to YOU.

I wont be posting any 'how to' threads for this one. This questionnaire thread is designed to let you see what schemas you may have, and to perhaps do a little bit of background research on the wesite http://www.schematherapy.com . YOU WILL NOT FIND DETAILED RECOVERY PLANS THERE - but you will find added information on how the schemas and coping styles work and may be affecting you in real life.

If you want to begin to work on them, you need the book or a therapist. Again, just like CBT - all of this will do very little unless you apply it, regularly. Lifelong ways of being, reacting and feeling still dont change overnight. Educate yourself, choose your path. Make a plan - it doesnt have to be 100%, just an outline. Then start working as described.

Im also gonna finish off my CBT series eventually, and by then I think my work will be done


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

And the scoring. 

NOTE: Fill the questionnaire before looking at this one.


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## njodis (Nov 8, 2006)

Hmmm, interesting. I'm not going to say what my results were, but it really wasn't very surprising to me.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

(sort of) whee :banana

Now you have some targets to work on. If you get the book, of course


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

Downloaded. And I will fill it out when I'm not thinking about sleep.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

I need some sleepage too

bless us


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

Mmm sleepage *face hits keyboard*

And I could have slept in a little, allowing my weird dream that involved some pretty awesome cupcakes to last longer. Yep.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

cupcakes can be passive aggressive

careful


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

:lol

These were friendly cupcakes. I'm sure of it.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Maybe you have become infected with cupcaquus friendlicus bacteria. Its a common infection that can be diagnosed with labtests under a microscope

[attachment=0:121j3qf3]mini-cupcakes.jpg[/attachment:121j3qf3]


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

I think
that might just be
the awesomest bacteria
ever.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Be aware of the less common, but easily mis-diagnosed, malignant version

[attachment=0:dr7qcw6b]evilcake.JPG[/attachment:dr7qcw6b]


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

I'm going to print it out and fill it out.. It looks a lot like the personality test at the psyche's that I took.

I have the dumbest printer that never works, so wish me luck.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Personality inventories are all kind of similar. The schema one is jigged to undercover schemas - unsurprisingly 

BTW there is no "you are a sexy space chick" schema.

Sorry


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

LOL 

dangit! I was sure that would be my top schema too. :yes


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

yeah_yeah_yeah said:


> Personality inventories are all kind of similar. The schema one is jigged to undercover schemas - unsurprisingly


smartass


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

I did it and my printer didn't **** out on me either!

wheee

My ultimate schema is Emotional Deprivation. (5) That explains so much of my behavior, espcially when I was younger. wow.

Abandomnent comes in second. (3)

Failure, Dependence, Subjugation and Entitlement all equally come in third place. (2)

Thanks, Ross. 

I am going to buy the book too. :yes

:thanks


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## Meee (Oct 24, 2005)

Emotional Deprivation (4) 

Social Isolation (5)

Defectiveness/Shame (4) 

Emotional Inhibition (5)

Unrelenting Standards (2)


That seems kinda bad...

So is that book any good?


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

When you have a few schemas, they can interact and reinforce one another. The book is very good - IF YOU APPLY WHAT IT SAYS. It will give a huge insight to you and reading about the people in the book, I find, gives those "oh my GOD - that is soo ME" type moments. It blew so many of my problems wide open.

Its not as good as schema therapy with a therapist, obviously - but give it a try. I think its awesome.

It will tell you to identify the CORE schemas. For example, Its possible that your Emotional Inhibition drives your social isolation, if you are unable to express yourself to people in any way. So you might like to work on that first.

However, Emotional Inhibition is not in the book - this is because it is frequently a sub-schema or compensation / reaction to other schemas (quoting from the practitioners guide) The closest one would probably be defectiveness and shame, if you sense that it is shameful to express yourself. If you have an internal standard that "being quiet is how I should be" or "i shouldnt speak unless its perfect", then work on unrelenting standards. Emotional Derivation is a thorny one. It means that you feel there is no-one out there to listen to you, validate you, understand you or show you unconditonal love. That pretty core and a tough one to work on. Ive been working on that one lately and its amazing just how 'buried' it is .. like its there all the time but you cant see it.

Of course you can go in and give social isolation a crack. If you read the book, it should be clear to you what to work on first. Read it and go by gut feel as well as your scoring. See if the scores you get from the book questionnaires match what you got just now.

As a note - "Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness" by Gillian Butler covers very much the same material as the recommended process for "Social Isolation", being very heavy on CBT (as well as the additional emotional schema methods). The schema way will provide you with greater insight and emotional tools, but IMo if you were to dedciate yourself a good 6 months of wokring with both things (the SI schema work and the Butler book) this would be a very good combination for SA. The schema may help to dig out some of the thornier blocks to progress with the CBT.


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## Polar (Dec 16, 2006)

I filled out the questionnairee, but I forgot to save the damn thing, and then my computer restarted itself!! :mum :mum


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

a good ninja never blames his weapons


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## IllusionOfHappiness (Sep 6, 2007)

In no particular order, these were my highest:

-Social Isolation                                      
-Unrelenting Standards
-Mistrust/Abuse 
-Emotional Deprivation
-Abandonment


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Hugs for the abandonment crew :squeeze


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## WhatsThePoint (Feb 6, 2008)

Emotional Inhibition 
Abandonment
Emotional Deprivation
Social Isolation
Defectiveness/Shame 

I've known about my "Emotional Inhibition" for quite a while now. I think it's my biggest issue all around socially that prevents me from being able to open up to people in real life, and therefore make any meaningful relationships. I did get the Reinventing Your Life book, though I haven't started reading it yet because im in CBT therapy now, so I guess I shouldn't jump into this right away. I really feel like this particular schema is an even bigger issue than my SA though, in a way...
Should I wait until im done with therapy in about 4 months until I start going through the book, you think?


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

WhatsThePoint said:


> Should I wait until im done with therapy in about 4 months until I start going through the book, you think?


Mention it to your CBT'er and see what they say 

Emotional Inhibition and Abandonment seem to be popping up quite a lot. Hmm. Interesting


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## Bon (Dec 24, 2005)

Extremely interesting. I've typically had an understanding of my situation but seeing it in black and white, gives you an idea of how far you have come and how far one has to go.

I've often thought a therapist might consider starting therapy like this, I think it would save a lot of time. Many of us have, gasp, denial issues, avoidance...... 

I find it so interesting how many of us can have the same feelings yet react in the world differently. Abandonment, shame, is a biggy.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Yup!! Also the different coping responses even to each individual schema identified by this therapy blow my mind. The variation in the way people deal with identical emotional troubles is truly fascinating, and the uniqueness of each person never fails to amaze me. Theres so much depth to this branch of psychology. I think its really exciting. (but I am a nerd)

What schemas have you worked on, Bon?


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## Bon (Dec 24, 2005)

yeah_yeah_yeah said:


> Yup!! Also the different coping responses even to each individual schema identified by this therapy blow my mind. The variation in the way people deal with identical emotional troubles is truly fascinating, and the uniqueness of each person never fails to amaze me. Theres so much depth to this branch of psychology. I think its really exciting. (but I am a nerd)
> 
> What schemas have you worked on, Bon?


Sense of failure (notice I said sense...), rather fear of failure, abandonment, sadly most of them, as many of us do that have chronic depression and anxiety, I want to say anxiety of any type, yet I know someone will come along and say I'm over generalizing. Yet I do believe most of our negative concepts come from our core.....When you've been subjected, and it's been ingrained in you to such a degree, it really is hard to shake. However, it's NOT impossible.

There are NO quick fixes, no short cuts (damn, I tried, it's called AVOIDANCE;-D one of my favorites, and I'm doing nothing to correct this;-D), yet I will in time.

I learned in CBT.......We must be kinder to ourselves, we must, we have to treat ourselves as we would treat a friend. Most of us will have bad days, I used to get on myself for feeling blah....Now, if I want to lay in bed, I lay in bed, I don't beat myself up for it ( Self sabotage) the difference is, I wont' do it for a week, I'll give myself so long....Then, up we go.......Get off your butt and do something.....The hardest aspect is taking responsibility. What was the question, I got lost in thought;-)


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Do you have any overcompensations?


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## Bon (Dec 24, 2005)

yeah_yeah_yeah said:


> Do you have any overcompensations?


Eating;-) I'm a smart ***;-) joking, I'll point out a flaw before someone else can.....I don't' know if it's over compensating, but I am extremely competitive when I start playing a sport, I CANT lose, I mean I WONT lose......... I think that's an issue though. It is amusing when my neighbor kids are around;-) "YOUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR OUT";-) they won't let me be a coach or catcher anymore, little bastards;-))))

I'll use humor when I'm scared, when something doesn't feel right, or when I'm unsure how something will be perceived.

Edit.......Not over compensating, but I have convinced myself that I have more confidence than I do, it works, after a while it works.....You start to believe in yourself. However, I am the first to say, if you don't deal with issues, that are causing the root you'll be on guard much of the time.


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

this is all so farkin helpful I can't wait to get the book


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Bon said:


> yeah_yeah_yeah said:
> 
> 
> > Do you have any overcompensations?
> ...


Overcompensating is basically over-reacting in the oppsoite direction of how you actually feel, but at a subconscious level. Eg acting arrogant if you felt afraid. Deliberately screwing things up because you feel you must be perfect. Deliberately rejecting other people because you fear they will leave you. Abusing others because you feel they will do it to you. Becoming obsessively organised because you feel incompetent. They are unhealthy because you still FEEL the same. You still experience the same painful feelings underneath. Your behaviours actually reinforce your schema - especially when your actions cause others to react negatively - eg abusing others invites abuse back, reinforcing your sense of mistrust and abuse. The key is to break the foundation it rests on - instead of seeking to bash through the walls all the time. So dealing with it is right. Understand the root so that you are no longer bound by either surrender, avoidance or overcompensation.

Go  HERE  for a list of coping responses

What evidence did you find against your failure schema? Did you identify its origin? Do you 'buy' it yet?

Ross


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## Bon (Dec 24, 2005)

yeah_yeah_yeah said:


> Bon said:
> 
> 
> > [quote="yeah_yeah_yeah":3ucqg3f9]Do you have any overcompensations?
> ...


Overcompensating is basically over-reacting in the oppsoite direction of how you actually feel, but at a subconscious level. Eg acting arrogant if you felt afraid. Deliberately screwing things up because you feel you must be perfect. Deliberately rejecting other people because you fear they will leave you. Abusing others because you feel they will do it to you. Becoming obsessively organised because you feel incompetent. They are unhealthy because you still FEEL the same. You still experience the same painful feelings underneath. Your behaviours actually reinforce your schema - especially when your actions cause others to react negatively - eg abusing others invites abuse back, reinforcing your sense of mistrust and abuse. The key is to break the foundation it rests on - instead of seeking to bash through the walls all the time. So dealing with it is right. Understand the root so that you are no longer bound by either surrender, avoidance or overcompensation.

Go  HERE  for a list of coping responses

What evidence did you find against your failure schema? Did you identify its origin? Do you 'buy' it yet?

Ross[/quote:3ucqg3f9]

Pretty darned accurate. Isn't it bedtime in Scotland or something;-)))))))))))))))))))))))


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## Lisa (Jul 8, 2006)

Hi Ross,

do you have something on schemas that cause us to relate to others in certain ways?

Lisa


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Hi Lisa

I would say that the WHOLE THING about schemas is the way they make us relate to people. If you wanted to find out more, I would say firstly try the questionnaire to find out what your schemas are. Descriptions of how the schemas affect your life and relationships occupy about 30 pages each in the book, so unfortunately that is the only neat and easy source I can refer you to.

An example though might be this. If a person had the Mistrust and Abuse schema, they would tend to act in ways that the schema name suggests. They would expect others to be abusive - either verbally or physically - to them. It would not be a consiocus decision - it would feel like something 'natural' or that 'has to be done' - but the individual may feel compelled to test peoples loyalty, to abuse others before they are abused, they may be hypersensitive to cues of abuse, they may presume that others are untrustworthy or that they are plotting against them.

The way this affects relationships - well, if that person tends to abuse first - then 'healthy' people will be pushed away. If there is no trust in a relationhsip, there is no relationship. If the person 'acts out' in their mistrust and attacks others, those others may well then decide that they do not like the individual and actually abuse that person - thus making the actual fear come true. Then the peson will say "see? I was right" even though it was their own actions that caused it. If a person has a history of abuse in their life, then they will feel naturally FAMILIAR with that kind of environment. Because of this familiarity, the person will feel drawn to it. Even though it may hurt them, 'heathy' relationships feel 'odd' or 'not right'.

So the schema serves to make that person pick abusive friends. The woman who had an abusive parent is more likely to pick an abusive partner. Sexual chemistry for abusive men will be very high. Sexual chemistry for those that do not fit the schema will be low. They may ask "why does this always happen to me?". The schema is out if sight and in control until it is unearthed and changed.

Thats one schema, and one coping avenue, but hopefully you can see the potential that they have to direct your life.


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## ~AJ~ (Jan 23, 2008)

It seems i just suffer from ED

hehehe..ED



so what am i supposed to do about that?? stick a gun to peoples head and say "show me some love!"


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

LOL

Just to make clear ... schemas arent something that can be regarded as an illness in their own right. You can have a schema and experience no symtpoms, depending on how you handle it, your environment and a myriad of other issues.

However, schemas can be the basis for suffering from certain disorders. In schema you may find that if you sit in the pure SA region, you may have one or two clear schemas. Then you get up to the likes of BPD folks ho have nearly all the schemas - but MOST IMPORTANTLY - their coping styles are HUGELY PAINFUL and dysfunctional.

So the schema itself does not indicate what you duffer from - it is the emotional root of any emotional symptoms you may have.



> so what am i supposed to do about that?? stick a gun to peoples head and say "show me some love!"


I would love to sit and type out the entire 45 page section on it for you .. but - actually, no - I WOULDNT like to type it out.

Buy the effing book if you want to know! Do some research! What ya want me to do? Wipe your damn *** for you as well?? :lol J/K ....


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## Polar (Dec 16, 2006)

From what I remember, before the computer decided to take a nap on me (I didn't save my answers, but I checked the scoring after filling out the questionairre), these were the ones I got.

Emotional Deprivation
Emotional Inhibition
Social Isolation
Vulnerability to Harm & Illness

Yeah, the EI is a problem for me. I have a hard time talking about myself to other people, and expressing my true feelings/emotions. It just feels so embarrassing and shameful. I'm having a diffcult time talking about myself even with my therapist.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

is that part of the scandinavian reserve? I know the norwegians I worked with were naturally very soft spoken. And they HATED swearing. They just wouldnt do it (in norwegian).


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## FairleighCalm (May 20, 2007)

I've got'em all. Abandonment, Mistrust and abuse, Vulnerablity, Emo Deprivation, etc.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

all of em have two or more more 5's and 6's?


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

I was just at the book store and could not find the book. :stu 

 Poopy poop poop poop.

guess I'll have to order it from amazon or something.


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## FairleighCalm (May 20, 2007)

I've had the book for a long time. B'cool if we could do a book club here online?


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

oooooh yeah 
a book club
cooool.


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## redstardude (Mar 10, 2008)

I've noticed that no one has mentioned the Failure schema. 
Failure ranks ahead of Social Isolation for me. 

Part of the theory of schemas is that they are supposed to normalise chacterological (personality) disorders. 

Everyone has schemas, although only in some people do they establish and/or maintain dysfunctional cognitive and behaviour patterns.


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## Phla12 (Mar 25, 2008)

Ross, this looks really helpful, and will give me something to do on this Saturday night. Thanks again for sharing your knowledge.


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## Lisa (Jul 8, 2006)

Thanks Ross


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## yellowpaper (Nov 13, 2007)

emotional deprivation (4)
abandonment (5)
mistrust/abuse (5)
social isolation (5)
defectiveness/shame (3)
emotional inhibition (3)
unrelenting standards (3)
entitlement (2)
insufficient self control/discipline (4)

=/

That seems pretty bad...
and all of it describes me so well. It's like me, in a few words.


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

Aha, Ross, this has the other schemas not in Reinventing Your Life (RYL). I only took the initial quiz from the RYL book once, so I took it again here.

Emotional Deprivation (3) --- the other two scores were 4's
Abandonment (0)
Mistrust/Abuse (1)
Social Isolation (5)
Defectiveness/Shame (4)
Failure (0)
Dependence/Incompetence (0)
Vulnerability to Harm & Illness (0)
Enmeshment (0)
Subjugation (3)
Self Sacrifice (0)
Emotional Inhibition (5)
Unrelenting Standards (0)
Entitlement (0)
Insufficient Self-Control/Self-Discipline (0)

So by this standard, my main schemas are:

- Emotional Deprivation
- Social Isolation
- Defectiveness/Shame
- Subjugation
- Emotional Inhibition

Hah, I just realized that this confirms with what I wrote out about a couple weeks ago about the so-called "Big 5" for me. It feels good to have these suspicions confirmed with this test as well. It helps to know I'm aiming in the right direction. :yes

Unfortunately my reading time will be occupied with the book my therapist wants me to read, but then I'll get back to the real meat (RYL). :lol

This book continues to help direct me to understand my situation better and better... I want to start doing the "letter exercise" soon with each member of my family (3 siblings, and each parent).


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## Atticus (Nov 10, 2003)

My schema are:

Social Inh. 5
Ins Self Control 5
Emotional Inh 3
Entitlement 2
Depend/Incomp 1

I don't score high on the defectiveness/shame questions because I don't consciously think of myself in those terms, but I believe I have some sort of "original sin" working in me that actually led to and explains my social isolation. Its a bit of a chicken and egg thing.

I think my tempermant, even had I been raised in an ideal situation, predisposes me to some anxiety. I learned to quit situations that were anxiety provoking or difficult in some other way, and I think I overcompensate by believing that I'm above all these petty concerns, anyway. 

Avoiding difficult tasks and having poor self discipline inevitably leads to some failure and a feeling of incompetence (some perceived, Ihave some 4s in unrelent stand)

My parents unwitting contribution was to make me a battle ground for their competing parenting styles/life views. Mom was soft, allowing and even encouraging me to be dependent. Dad was a hard ***, perhaps in response to my mom, or her in response to him? 

I've read the book, and I think it provided me with a language to discuss these issues and a way to think about them that is helpful. I'm stuck, though, on the "working through" part. I've always been good at identifying the problem, not so much on solving it.


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

I've been taking on multiple schemas at once, but it's tough to do that and I might need to back down a bit or I could burn out fast.

The most tangible thing I've been attacking is Social Isolation. Defectiveness has been beating me around with a baseball bat at times though (strongly correlated with moments in which Emotional Deprivation/Inhibition are knocked down), which is getting downright ****ing annoying though! I am going to be meeting several new people though (in person), starting in this month. I think my doing this has been the catalyst to Emo Dep/Inhib letting loose Defectiveness on me (usually invisible when Emo Dep/Inhib are in firm command).

I don't care if I have to to meet them AND their friends at the same time too (if that's how they want to do it). That will obviously be more difficult, but I've just about had it with Social Exclusion. I have to actually BEHAVE differently...that's something that you just have to do yourself, despite getting the **** knocked out of you by your schemas.

The book is just the stepping stone for you to actually DO things differently after recognizing your patterns as deeply as possible. It won't take that step for you. No book is likely to help people dramatically by reading alone. That fact seems to trouble a lot of people on SAS, who seem to demand that they should somehow magically change despite not changing one thing they're doing. :lol

I'm prepared to see just how deep this rabbit hole goes.... It's stunningly terrifying (words can't describe how richly pitch dark defectiveness can make me feel), but it's precisely what holds me in place when it comes to my toughest challenges (intimacy).


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## Atticus (Nov 10, 2003)

One thing the book has added to my understanding of myself is that I have a sense of entitlement. I have seen myself as arrogant regarding some rules, and I've even belittled people who take comfort in following rules (mostly happy folks :con ) as lemmings. And I know I have rigid ideas about how the world should be, but I never landed on the right space to see that these could be symptoms of a demandingness (word?).

I think entitlement is what allows me to skip the hard part, because I souldn't have to. I cringe when I read that, but anyway. Thats where I'm stuck, and so its where I need to focus. I just can't get past an intellectual understanding of the problem, and down to an emotional grasp of it. Look at my list; I don't do emotions so well.


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

YES EXACTLY!!

ENTITLEMENT (well AND plain laziness of course :b )makes it hard to make the moves necessary to take the steps for recovery. 

We want the easiest fastest fix, which isn't the everlasting one. 




Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee!


No Schema people around here but I am starting CBT and am FORCING myself to comply with all activities and such to help with my issues. 

NO MORE BULL****!

YEAH BABY!


HOORAY FOR GETTING THE NECESSARY HELP TO BETTER OURSELVES!


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

Hah, yeah Atticus, I know what you mean about the emotion-related schemas. I max out on emotional inhibition, and I'm not far behind maxing out in emotional deprivation. I find it _extraordinarily_ difficult to get close to people and express emotions to people. I often see acts of human affection as disturbing or gross, and I am extremely averse to sexual acts and intimacy on the surface. When I have managed to have a crush, it is usually with females who I know are not interested me in that way (or who are not very loyal and will hop from guy to guy to guy in regards to her preferred people).

Oddly, the emo stuff is all perpetuated very strongly by my Social Isolation (which I didn't see until I recently started being very aggressive in trying to meet people). Underneath that is the Defectiveness, which might be my ugliest one at the core.

It's hard to take it all on at once, so for now I'm just going to work on Social Isolation for awhile and see what happens as other crap stirs.



CoconutHolder said:


> YES EXACTLY!!
> 
> ENTITLEMENT (well AND plain laziness of course :b )makes it hard to make the moves necessary to take the steps for recovery.
> 
> ...


Kick some ***!!! You've got this!! GO GO GO!!! :lol


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## david90 (Mar 21, 2004)

Here is my stats

social isolation 2
emotion inhibition 5

COuld somebody tell me more about emotion inhibition? I'm gonna get the book but for now..


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## CoconutHolder (Oct 13, 2007)

check the schema website, there is a little of info there on the schemas. Its the site that the quiz was on or whatever.


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## david90 (Mar 21, 2004)

yeah_yeah_yeah said:


> When you have a few schemas, they can interact and reinforce one another. The book is very good - IF YOU APPLY WHAT IT SAYS. It will give a huge insight to you and reading about the people in the book, I find, gives those "oh my GOD - that is soo ME" type moments. It blew so many of my problems wide open.
> 
> Its not as good as schema therapy with a therapist, obviously - but give it a try. I think its awesome.
> 
> ...


your description of Emotional Inhibition is dead on to what I have been suspecting about myself. It took a while but I discovered that I see defective/weird thus I keep quite. Yes I do act uptight in public.


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## Meee (Oct 24, 2005)

So is Ross gone for good? His last posts didn't look too good... :|


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Hello

No I'll post every now and again to help people who have questions on CBT or Schema. I wont be writing much other than that however and will be sticking to the therapy board.


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## gozinsky (Mar 11, 2008)

ed. 3
ab. 5
ma.2
si. 5
ds. 5
ei. 5
us. 5
vh. 4
em. 3
sb. 5

Lotta schemas.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Fo shizzle

Those have gotta be causing some hurt ...


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## gozinsky (Mar 11, 2008)

yeah and I can't even drink anymore. Sucks.


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## katelyn (Jul 11, 2006)

This thread is very interesting, I didn't see it before. I actually bought the set of questionnaires and other materials from the schema therapy website a few weeks ago (because I wanted the new versions of everything). Anyway, the results didn't look good:

social isolation - very very high
unrelenting standards - very very high
approval-seeking - very very high

defectiveness - very high
dependence - very high
emotional inhibition - very high
entitlement - very high
negativity/pessimism - very high
punitiveness - very high
mistrust/abuse - very high

The others were all Medium, apart from Enmeshment which was low. I have no idea how I'd go about identifying my core schemas from those. I really tried hard to answer the questions honestly, but now I'm wondering why I have so many schemas. I'm trying to work on them using the book and the therapist's materials, but it's hard knowing where to start.


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## gozinsky (Mar 11, 2008)

Started reading the book. Working on subjugation schema. This one's pretty big for me. Putting other people's needs first and denying myself, anger, submission, needing approval, guilt, not assertive, etc.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Hi Katelyn

With that many schemas, that high, its wiser to seek out a therapist. Working from the book is going to become unwieldy. If those schemas are activated A LOT for you and most of the time, it becomes easier to work with MODES as opposed to schemas. Check out on the website for the modes.

The questionnires are only a tool to inform the direction of therapy. Your core schemas are sinply your highest ones. I would suggest that Social Isolation and Approval Seeking are the two most influential in your life - however in Reinventing Your Life, Approval Addiction is not covered. SI is. However with Punitiveness and defectiveness in the mix, life is going to become much more difficult. Using RYL is recommended only when you have a couple of schemas to work on, or when its clear to you that the other schemas do not dominate your life. If you are at all prone to self harm then especially seek out a therapist (a strong punitiveness schema can lead to this)

The content on SI is almost identical to the Gillian Butler book however and so if you have worked diligently and completely through that and not found help (and your SI rating is still this high) then for sure schema therapy face to face would be a logical next step. In fact if you have had formal CBT face to face for any significant length of time, and still suffer depression / anxiety, then a switch to schema is a good idea.

Hi Gozinsky - working on sunjugation is a good idea! If you do start to feel lost and pulled in too many directions though, do not be hard on yourself. With 10 competing schemas it is to be expected. Same advice goes for you - finding a therapist would be the best approach.

You can obtain a list of local therapists by emailing the schema folk. Address at http://www.schematherapy.com


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

Those are a gauge of avoidance and overcompensation. In some folks, particularly those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, compensations for schemas are so strong that the person is unaware of their schemas and they work entirely subconsciously. If someone scored very low on many of the schemas in the questionnaire, but very high on the second lot, then its likely that they fall into the compesnation bracket and may have deeper issues than the therapist using the questionnaire will at first glance be aware of.

A different treatment path would then be used.

The questionnaires are all intended purely to inform the therapist of which direction to take in treatment, or as a next step in assessment. They are only a guide and each person is an individual.

Schema also uses 'modes' in treatment as well. More info on http://www.schematherapy.com .


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## Eilicea (Jun 15, 2008)

Social Isolation -- 4
Dependence/Incompetence -- 3
Subjugation -- 2
Unrelenting Standards -- 2

So I'm not as messed up as I thought...although I did have a lot of 3's and 4's on a lot of the other sections. Also I got a LOT of 5's and 6's on the "avoidance" section (which I filled out just for fun xD)

btw I don't think this test is entirely accurate, because the current environment I'm in influences this stuff immensely. As in, my life-situation is not under my control, and once I get into a different life-situation this will change. For example, the dependence/incompetence thing comes about because every day I have my mom TELLING me that I have no common sense and that I don't know what I'm talking about and can't do anything correctly, &c....but once I get out of that situation by leaving and going off on my own or whatever that'll change, won't it? And the "unrelenting standards" thing comes about because basically from the age of 4 onwards I've been prodded to work hard and value learning and all that Puritan ****e...but I don't actually care about stuff really, I just do the work because it's there and I've got nothing better to do, and it's easier to do it than to face the consequences of not doing it.

Man do I sound emo. xD But does that make any sense?


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## danielk (Jun 4, 2008)

In order from the scoring form:

*2* _Social isolation_
*4* _Social undesirability_
*5* _Failure_
*5* _Unrelenting standards_
*5* _Insufficient self-control/standards_

I don't know what to make of it, though, nor how much stock to even give it.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

They are just a tool to give you a direction for recovery when using schema therapy. If you were to read the chapters in the book on the schemas you would more than likely find yourself identifying very strongly with the schema decriptions. The questionnaire itself is only a starting point - at least, that was the reason I posted it - in the hope that people would use it as a starting point. Whether that has happened I cant be sure.


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## danielk (Jun 4, 2008)

yeah_yeah_yeah said:


> The questionnaire itself is only a starting point - at least, that was the reason I posted it - in the hope that people would use it as a starting point. Whether that has happened I cant be sure.


I had never heard of this inventory or _schema therapy_ before. I knew of _schemas_, of course. It's quite clever, however, and I sincerely hope that it helps those who partake of it!


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## katelyn (Jul 11, 2006)

Well, I have contacted the schema website to ask for a list of therapists around here. They didn't reply yet. Although there's no way I can afford it now, maybe next year when I'm working I will be able to. It's something I think would be really helpful for me.

For now, I'm still working with the Gillian Butler book and it's definitely helping me. I think schema would be something to do after reducing my SA.


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## shy_chick (Sep 27, 2006)

I've started schema therapy as it sounded like it would help. It's in the initial stages and I'm feeling quite good that it's tackling the problem whereas in previous therapy it didn't seem to be. I had to do a questionnaire about my parents and what my childhood was like which was linked to the schemas. 

My major schemas are unrelenting standards and emotional deprivation, and moderate schemas in emotional inhibition, dependence/incompetence and social isolation.


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## ardrum (May 13, 2007)

Wow, you UKers seem to have such open access to schema! The closest one to me is too far away.


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## StimulateYourBrain (Nov 20, 2011)

so how do you stop Overcompensating without i have to read a hole book?


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