# Losing Hope On life..



## LifeIsTiresome (Dec 12, 2015)

Well I guess I'll write to you guys my story. I use to be that one kid who was always optimistic and happy. Well at least that's what everyone else saw. It all started my freshman year of high school when I use to believe that I actually have friends to support me in the future. Well.. I guessed wrong 2 years later at the end of my sophmore year my ex broke up with me and cheated on me without a legit reason to. As I was coping with my sadness, I did try to get help from friends but when I think about it I regret even trying. Just knowing that my so called friends where there for me. A couple months later in my junior year, or at least this year as I am a junior. I began to realize so much of my life was wasted on being abused, lied to, etc.. I'm questioning my existence as in school people believe that I'm annoying for some reason but I can actually see why.. No matter how much I try to get help from others I get rejected.. A girl I told I liked also brought my hopes for life even down. She told me she's willing to give me a chance but did a 180 and was just kidding by using her parents as an excuse... I always feel lonely at school, home, and everywhere I go because I'm always by myself 90% of the time. Everyone around me treats me like an outsider and I just feel awkwars.. I don't know what to do anymore as I feel like I can't take my loneliness anymore and just feel like dying... But even when I think that if I died or gone somewhere missing I just feel as if no one actually really cares except my family. But I know that eventually I'll be forgotten about by everyone.. well I know it doesn't sound dramatic but it just kills me feeling like an outsider to people. People I use to talk to just talk behind my back and people I use to hang out with walk past me. I don't know what to do anymore....
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## silentsymbols (Nov 23, 2015)

I've just seen this while going through the therapy threads. I just wanted you to know that you're not alone. I feel this way too. I'm not sure it gets better, but I hope it does for both of us and for anyone who feels this way.


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## ScottK94 (Oct 22, 2015)

I felt this way in school too and now looking back later I can see a few things that happened to me then. I was pretty happy and had friends up until my early teens or so and then things began to change for me that I see now happened because of the disease of social anxiety. I began to become withdrawn, was more nervous around former friends and probably appeared more aloof. People pick up on these things when socializing with people like us and may become uncomfortable themselves. That may be what is happening with you at school, as well.


I can't pretend to fully understand the depth of the difficulties you are having and to suggest a solution in a post, but there is help out there in the form of medications and therapy, support groups, and the like.


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## ND 123 (Jan 10, 2016)

i have similar experiences w abuse etc. I hope you know you aren't alone.


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