# Is your therapist meant to make you feel special



## Eski (Aug 6, 2011)

I understand that some are meant to give good positive feedback and make you feel good and all that but are they meant to make you feel like your their special one?. 

Also whats it mean if a girl lowers her head looking at the floor while blushing and smiling?. Internet tells me it means shame :blank


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## Killer2121 (Jul 12, 2012)

I think a therapist should be as objective and critical as possible. You see, when you make someone feel special or just simply boost their confidence you aren't really solving the problem. It's kinda like taping up your broken muffler to your car. It's fixed tempoarily, but eventually it will break again. Same goes with you're issues when the specialness and confidence boost goes down.


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## chantellabella (May 5, 2012)

R91 said:


> ^ pretty much!
> 
> Eski, your therapist is there to guide you, and ideally, it should be an objective but caring relationship. If she is making you feel special though, then that's okay for now. Hopefully it's not intentional but instead she is making you realise that you _are_ special and worthy of goodness and kindness and patience.
> 
> ...


I agree my friend.

I've had some good and bad experiences with therapists. I had two who made me feel so special that I ended up reporting them for sexual abuse and fostering dependence. They set me back in recovery decades.

I've also had two really good ones who made me hate therapy. The first I saw for ten years and the only thing we worked on was trust after I got hurt by the other therapist. For ten years he sat on one end of the room and I sat on the other. He never touched me and I can honestly say he was the first person on the planet I trusted. I ended up moving away from the city and when I was leaving for the last time, he asked me if I wanted to shake his hand. I did. I'm saddened that he died about 2 years ago.

My present therapist makes me hate therapy. She's a trauma specialist who was taught by the Colin Ross Institute. The reason I say I hate therapy is because she doesn't let me get away with distraction. She has never touched me. She fosters independence rather than dependence and will let me fall flat on my face, knowing I have the strength to pick my self up. My weekly therapy sessions are probably the worst part of my week.

But after 7 years with this lady, I am finally getting better. She has stamina. I'm also a Licensed Professional Counselor (like her) and know that side of the room. (I'm no longer practicing, but still have my license current). She has a life, her own problems and when she leaves her office that day, I might be on her mind a bit, but I'm not the center of her world.

It's the fact that she doesn't need me that makes me feel safe.

Sorry for being long winded. Therapists are touchy subjects for me because of my bad experiences with them.


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## thundercats (Mar 12, 2012)

chantellabella said:


> My weekly therapy sessions are probably the worst part of my week.


Sounds good.


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