# Are you stuck in childhood?



## nervousman

Personally, I feel like I'm stuck in high school. In high school you could hide behind your age and just act stupid. As an adult you are held responsible for your actions and must take leadership in certain situations or people look down on you. Because of my anxiety and lack of confidence I fear these things.... especially in the workplace. I feel isolated from adulthood and my peers. Anyone else feel this way?


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## sda

Yeah most definitely. Even in my 30s I feel like a child, and at times act it. 

It feel odd and weird when people refer to me as a man. Like one some little kid was blocking my way, his farther (probably my age or younger) said "please let that man pass through". The word man, that sounded so odd. 

I know what you mean about leadership, especially at work. I been doing this type of job for a better part of a decade, yet I feel like a young grad/intern. In fact it feels so odd when young grads come in a within 6months or a year they look like they command more presence and show leadership than me! Leadership scares me. 

What I am meant to be at this stage in my career (and of course life) scares me. 

I certainly can understand the isolation. People around me, are so adult. They are in relationships, getting married, living life. 
Here I am sitting here being scared of what I am and what I am meant to be in this stage of my life.


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## Ashley1990

i am almost 14 yet..my eating habbits ..even the way i sleep is the same as i used to when i was 8...


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## peanutbutter

Yeah, sometimes I feel especially odd in the workplace when younger people ask about my personal life, I feel that people expect you to have hit certain markers by a certain age, and people in general are more judgemental of those that are older than themselves.


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## littleblacckcat

Yes i still feel like i am still a teenager, and then i get moments similar to the one above and you realise that you are now a fully grown adult, and what you thought an 'adults life' would look like is nothing like the sad lonely life you have now. 

I think a lot of people feel like this, its just for me i focus so much in the fact that i havent reached the milestones i felt i should have by my age. And with every birthday it gets harder.


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## suril

I'm about to turn 29, and I find myself still thinking and acting immature like a middle schooler. I just want to "play" instead of confronting serious (yet scary) matters and being more ambitious. I've probably said this many times in the past, but I'm a late-bloomer for sure...a lazy one.

It feels so bizarre when people assume I'm married, have children, own a house, have a successful career, experienced many life adventures, etc...I think to myself, "what are you talking about?! I'm too young for that stuff!"...And then I realize, "No wait...I'm not."


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## falling down

Possibly...


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## Endorphin buzz

I feel the same . In some ways it's good to be young and have fun . In other ways it sucks and makes me feel like I'm not normal .


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## rhames

yes i fell like im stuck mentally / emotionally as a teenager... its like ive taken longer to mature.. so if i was where im at mentally now when i was in high school maybe i would have more of a normal life


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## littlemisshy

Yes, I feel like I am the same awkward teenager but stuck in the body of a 38 yr old.


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## CeilingStarer

I think that this modern day 'adulthood' is just a bunch of conditioning anyway. Having a career isn't written in the human genome once you reach some age. It's all a construct.


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## pumpkinspice

I wish I was stuck in my childhood. Those were the good ole days. When the only important life decisions to make were which Saturday morning cartoon to watch first.


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## fg35

omg sda explained exact how i feel! it totally sucks! god dammit why cant people just be nice? where is it written that becoming mature means you also treat.... i dont know. i had a bad day at werk. im 35 and people jrk me around and talk behind my back. worse i can sometimes see myself and see that yeah, im a dumbass tweaker and i would treat myself the same way. ****. why cant i have that perspective all the time so that i can learn how to behave like a civilized adult and stop doing stupid **** that makes people treat me badly? god dammit i really jave had enough and im just about done trying.


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## RawrJessiRawr

nervousman:1059852686 said:


> Personally, I feel like I'm stuck in high school. In high school you could hide behind your age and just act stupid. As an adult you are held responsible for your actions and must take leadership in certain situations or people look down on you. Because of my anxiety and lack of confidence I fear these things.... especially in the workplace. I feel isolated from adulthood and my peers. Anyone else feel this way?


This is exactly why I have so much anxiety


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## nervousman

During high school I basically hid behind my 3 friends and family. I was ok until I had to deal with people one on one. Now I'm 30 and that's all I do. My friends moved on and if I wanna make a living I'm forced to deal with lots of "important people". I fear this and I will never get better at it. Just the other day I had to talk to a manager about a special display I needed to put up in a store. I was so nervous I took 2 xanax pills just to get through it. Even dealing with my boss is stressful. Today he was talking to me about an issue at a store and I felt like running away.... and I've known him for 3 years. High school was far from good, but at least I got to hide behind people and wasn't expected to do much.


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## Lansdude

Yes, absolutely. I think this lies at the root of the problem. To grow into an adult you need confidence, to have confidence you need certainty. You have to get that somewhere - family, friends, school - but if you somehow don't get a hold of it you don't really make the jump and you become abnormal. Once you're abnormal your anxiety increases.

I remember even back in highschool observing people preparing their futures and not being able to relate at all to how certain they were about what they were going to do. I was unmotivated and couldn't understand how people just get involved in things and go full steam at them. Already at ages 16, 17, 18, people were taking on big responsibilities and relishing it, where all I wanted to do was daydream and play computer games.

I think there are a number of ways we can become alienated this way and I think it starts to happen at a young age.

For me, my parents were somewhat cynical and not really involved in anything outside of work. That gave me a kind of lackadaisical identity. I didn't really have a model to follow that showed me it was ok (in fact necessary) to get out in the world and take on projects and follow through with convictions and not be embarrassed by it. The last part is key because I've never been popular. When you're not popular you don't have a worldview to share with your peers either. Adding to this unpopularity and the feeling of being a child or wanting to remain a child is that I've always been small and young-looking. People didn't take me seriously, so I didn't take myself seriously. If you can't take yourself seriously you can't take any of your goals seriously.

So if you don't get a good start at it when you're younger it's hard to do it later on as everyone else has moved on and this causes you to be more depressed and more alienated. Since you don't feel a part of that world you don't see why you should struggle to join it. There doesn't seem to be a good reason for it.

Here I am working a job that is below my intelligence, and although I'm unhappy about it, while I feel like a kid, I don't want to leave this "childhood". I have more time and less responsibility this way, but I know I should have more responsibility and challenge myself. But I don't want it because I know I can't handle it and it would feel like meaningless toil. I want to be normal but am just not normal.

That's what I think is going through my head anyway. Can anyone else identify the root of this in their own lives?


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## gaz

Yes mainly because i am still pretty reliant on my parents. I have never moved out and i have no bills to pay which people say i am lucky because of but to me i feel ashamed that i am 31 and feel i should be responsible.

I see people who are ten years younger and they live ''adult'' lives, good jobs, married etc.


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## The Sleeping Dragon

It feels weird when kids call me 'mister'.  But I think this is the case for most people who are < 40. Just not used to it yet.


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## HopefulSeeker

It took me a long time to grow up. My household when younger was filled with criticism and I had very little confidence as a result. When in my thirties, things were tough. Started turning a corner around 38, felt more gown up by early forties. Gained a lot of confidence once I got a job in a supportive environment where I could grow without fear. Have made huge progress since then. 

Can still feel anxiety, particularly when there is an authority figure in a workplace who can put the fear of god in you. We all know what they are like. I grew up in my mid forties. It just took much longer. I'm in a much better place now. Much more comfortable. With the world. With myself. Not cocky, or ego driven, just comfortable. 

Seeker


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## sanspants08

At 28, I dated an 18-year-old, and relived the end of high school and young adulthood. It was scary but pretty freakin cool :yes. My girlfriend's boss thought I was 18 :lol. So not only did I seem to be stuck in the teenage years, but I actually fit in with the kids and they saw me as a peer. That girl stayed with me for three and a half years, and to this day I haven't had a better relationship. 

At 34, I feel like I finally just turned 25. I'm happy to not identify with my age bracket though; most 30-somethings I know go to bed at 9:00, can't make a move without possibly having a conference call. They tuck in their shirts, wear their pants too high, and play board games instead of just talking to one another. In short, they suck, and I'm glad I'm not like them.


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## tennislover84

I do feel stuck in childhood, because I find it very difficult to relate to most people my own age. They all have careers, cars, children, some are married and living together. I don't have any of those experiences, so I feel completely lost trying to make conversation! And I don't feel like I'm "ready" for most of those things, despite people much younger than me already being there. Anxiety has cut short a lot of the natural development of skills and experiences, that I would have acquired otherwise.

But at the same time, I often feel more mature in other ways. I don't feel I can relate to many people much younger than me either. Argh! Is there anybody I can relate to?

I do tend to wear young looking clothes though. It worries me sometimes, in that I wonder whether other people think I'm dressing too young for my age. I like to wear colourful t-shirts and tracksuit bottoms or baggy trousers all the time. They're just very comfortable. Catching a glimpse of my reflection and what I'm wearing sometimes makes me think I look like an older person dressing like a teenager. But you know, I'm not going to change what I feel comfortable in if it's not hurting anybody. And so far, these negative thoughts are only coming from me anyway...


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## Rodin

36 going on 10 here.


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## 50piecesteve

yeah real talk right here, 27 just turning 18 here


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## chantellabella

Definitely feel stuck. About at age 14.


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## shymomoffour

Sometimes Im surprised that I have four kids when I act like a kid myself. I listen to their music...laugh when their friends say jokes we old folks (33) shouldnt understand. I get hurt when my kids say stop acting like that act like a mom. Im like ???????? How do you do that... I like what I like... there shouldnt be an age limit to stop acting fun.


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## jimkon1479

I'd say I'm stuck in childhood. I missed most of my teenage rituals like first kiss, first drive (due to epilepsy) and I've either used my learning disability or deafness as an excuse. I always feel time pushing me forward and social anxiety pushing me back having me float in place, stuck in the same age. 
I have a hard time relating to adults and children. They drive and I can't plus I live at home with a part time job. Getting along with adults has been easier since I took said job and I am able to bounce off any jokes they make but have a hard time with deeper discussions. The fact that they are on their cell phones doesn't help either. Interactions with strangers has been easier, even though I work at a store, explain the product, and that's it. I remember when I brought up stocks to guys 10 years older than me (around 40 years old), they became engaged while I lost interest quickly, thinking "How old did I get? I'm talking about stocks."
As for getting along with children, ever since I became a scoutmaster in the troop, any attempt to bond with younger people just become awkward. They stare at me and say "Huh?" when I make a joke or show interest in their conversation. At a Cub Scout camp, I got yelled at twice for being "friendly" towards junior female staff, which means I couldn't rub shoulders as a joke or ask for a picture of them because I was an adult staff guy, and got yelled at for both. I was told stuff like "You're not a kid anymore, you can't do this stuff."
When I became Ecology Director for at my Boy Scout camp, I was told that my subordinates, under 18 were going to cause me trouble. I wanted to impress my boss, and because of my anxiety, I knew I couldn't be strong enough to exert my authority, so I overcompensated by being a micromanaging harda** and it was very draining on me with all the paperwork, classes and holing myself up in my office. I figured I might as well since I can't get along with kids anyway.


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## Maninthebox84

Sometimes I think I am still in high school. Back then I was a nerd and hated it. The few friends I had were boring like me, and I never had fun with other people.

Now I am even lonelier. I listen to loud music like teenagers do, wear band T-shirts and tight jeans to work and stopped tying my hair. Yet I feel too old and embarrassed to approach the younger people there, especially girls. Occasionally I will make small talk with older people or those my age but I don't have much to say. I sit on the ground of the office entrance lobby and listen to music like some loner in high school. It doesn't help that I am 5'6 and 100 pounds. My vocabulary is somewhat limited and I can't express myself very well due to my SA. I have a degree in computer science but I have a job that does not even require a high school diploma. I don't care about making more money because I don't like children and do not want to start a family later. I would be happy living in an apartment for the rest of my life.

I don't think I will grow up until I get a girlfriend and move out of my parent's home. I am living 1 decade in the past. Time froze for me, but not for everyone else around me.


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## eyedlemon

nervousman said:


> During high school I basically hid behind my 3 friends and family. I was ok until I had to deal with people one on one. Now I'm 30 and that's all I do. My friends moved on and if I wanna make a living I'm forced to deal with lots of "important people". I fear this and I will never get better at it. Just the other day I had to talk to a manager about a special display I needed to put up in a store. I was so nervous I took 2 xanax pills just to get through it. Even dealing with my boss is stressful. Today he was talking to me about an issue at a store and I felt like running away.... and I've known him for 3 years. High school was far from good, but at least I got to hide behind people and wasn't expected to do much.


When higher-ups talk to me about work issues my usual reaction is not giving sh** about it, although I always pretend to care. Generally, the only difference between them and me is that they have a much higher tolerance for dealing with BS and I do. In my field, there is generally a standing offer for management positions, but it's not worth it.

Although I'm technically not a manager, I am technically a supervisor, but I hate the title. I want everybody to be good at his/her job and work at least as hard as I do, but that doesn't always happen. I am nearly incapable of disciplining anyone, and I don't always know how to delegate. Mostly I just get annoyed at the world, and someone (a manager, probably), gets to clean up any mess.

My weakness is that I want everybody to like me, and I feel bad if I think I'm pushing people to work harder.


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## BoBooBoo

I didn't really get to act like a teenager when I was that age, so now I'm making up for it. I'll act like an adult when I have to, but most of the time I'm a 39 year old woman with the mentality of a teenage boy (think Beavis & Butt-head). I still even own crayons and coloring books and use them.


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## Crystalline

I feel more like 22 than 32, though at 19 I felt like 30. Rather strange really, though at times I get injuries or body pains and get reminded of my real age.


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## jimkon1479

I know I listed a lot in my last post. I just have a lot to say. It does feel a bit strange when parents tell their kids "Let the man through." or when the doctor calls and says my wife was on earlier when it was really my mother. Did I mention I still live at my parent's house? While I was commuting to college in my early twenties, I did go to the same music school that teenagers did (playing drums)and even though we played music as a group, except for one kid, I related to the teachers better than the kids. I just take guitar lessons there now which some adults do by the way and stopped going to the teenage music program.
At least I don't watch wrestling like I used to. I used to really get into it when I was a teenager, but now it seems so cartoonish.


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## Mysteriousvirgo

suril said:


> It feels so bizarre when people assume I'm married, have children, own a house, have a successful career, experienced many life adventures, etc...I think to myself, "what are you talking about?! I'm too young for that stuff!"...And then I realize, "No wait...I'm not."


Wow...it's like I wrote those words myself.


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## patheticiq

nervousman said:


> As an adult you are held responsible for your actions and must take leadership in certain situations or people look down on you. Because of my anxiety and lack of confidence


I am very much .......At my childhood years , I have a "special tactic" for getting things but this became my nightmare as an adult....That was ; Never take leadership or responsibility, don't ignore or argue and be always nice ....Lack of confidence helped me very much to do this...And guess what ; at these childhood years ,without doing any action I got what I wanted by this method.....If there is a fight , my friends will fight for me ....There is a tackle , my parents will solve it ....There is a problem , my people around will fix it for me ..And listen to this ; There has to be taken a passing grade from a lesson , No Problem ! ,my teacher will give the passing grade for me even I am giving an empty paper , passing the class for an empty test paper ! One of my teacher's said that you are my favourate student ...You never bother the class and me any time , thank you .....

I got everything I wanted in my childhood with doing nothing and now I want to be like that again....But there was a protecting armour for my lack of confidence at childhood and high school years but now this armour has gone and I am alone with myself...If I can go back to these years I never use this armour for my lack of confidence and I fix my own thing by myself so I would not be in the situation where I am now ......


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## aloneanddizzy

suril said:


> It feels so bizarre when people assume I'm married, have children, own a house, have a successful career, experienced many life adventures, etc...I think to myself, "what are you talking about?! I'm too young for that stuff!"...And then I realize, "No wait...I'm not."


I have the very same feeling at times even now, but about different things. I have had an interesting career with some high points, but the problem is I'm not at the "correct" stage of my career for this point in my life. Apparently the expectation is that I would have moved into management before now, but I am not good enough with people to make that a reasonable role for me, and it is becoming a real problem. And don't get me started on how aggravating it is that people assume the only acceptable career development schedule is the one most everyone else chooses to follow. But anyway, every time I am looked at like I should be conducting myself as a management-level of person, I think "but wait, I'm just a kid!" And then I remember that I am not &#8230; but the age still feels like a mask that just barely covers up that same kid that I always have been. (Except when I am ill, which is the one time I really feel my age.)

Almost no one I meet assumes I am married, have children, or even have a partner, though. I guess when they've seen my face, they automatically know none of that was in the cards for me.


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## MobiusX

I don't like how these adults keep calling me Sir. It makes me feel old. I'm going to be 28 soon and I don't like it. I would rather be 14, but no older than 17. Life after high school is when it began to get worse. I like the movie Big that came out in 1988 with Tom Hanks, a favorite movie of mine since childhood.


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## upndownboi

very much so unfortunately


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## Amorphousanomaly

Definitely! I would much rather play with my stuffed animals and watch anime than anything else. I hate doing grown up things.


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## cloister2

Yes i think so. I think I find 'toys' to keep me preoccupied.


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## Xenos

Yeah, this is pretty much how I feel all the time. Years 8-13 were when I discovered that I was one of those people that everyone else just hates on and makes fun of. This scarred me bad enough that at around 14 - when I started high school - I just withdrew, and avoided contact and interaction as much as I could. So I basically stopped growing as a person, and twenty years later I'm still that defensive, scared, hurt little kid. I never figured out what I wanted to do with my life, never had the experiences that might inform a decision like that. I'm 36 and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.


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## parag0n

Yes I definitely can relate to this, I just turned 29 and still live with my parents. And everyone always assumes that I'm a virgin even though I'm not. Very frustrating.


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## M0rbid

I'm going to turn 28 very soon and I still feel like a child. Sometimes I forget that I'm an adult LOL.


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## coeur_brise

26 and still pretty much stuck in that 14 yr old mindset, except with a bit more baggage. It sucks that I haven't aged a bit physically or even emotionally.


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## steve74

I'm so glad I saw this thread.. I'm 38 and always feel that my brain got stuck emotionally , sometime in my teens.. 

This always makes me feel really anxious and panicky that I've missed the boat and am running out of time to have all the things that men my age have been enjoying for years..intimate relationships, friends,family,social life, own homes, money, career etc,etc ..

It makes matters worse that I ended up back at my parents house a few years ago and have since ended up unable to work or be around people because I feel so out of place and ashamed of myself..

I feel incapable of standing up for myself both pysically and emotionally and feel under threat all the time from peoples judgements and ridicule.. 

Sorry this isn't a positive contribution to the thread..!!!


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## Cynara

In some ways, I felt younger than others my age for a long time. I still look a lot younger than people my age, and because I didn't take the conventional life paths (i.e.: marriage and kids) I often expect to be judged (and often am) as odd. Interestingly, my lack of marriage or kids had less to do with my SA than it did my basic unconventionality. These were never big goals of mine to begin with.

But I can really relate to feeling as if you're not measuring up at work somehow, because you don't want to take on more "leadership". I hate that idea that one has to constantly take on yet more work. Dear god, why? I don't have the confidence yet to be a leader, and moreover, I wouldn't want to go to the effort of leading the people I work with.


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## straightarrows

mmmmm,, more like a high school teenager sometimes!!


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## ToucanSam

I think that arrested adolescence is a key part of SA.

Our preoccupation with others' opinions of us, fear of social situations, hesitancy to initiate friendships, etc. are - to some extent - the result of incomplete maturity.

When we set aside all of the SA psycho-babble, what remains is a set of age-inappropriate behavior. For example, it might be age-appropriate for a 2nd-grader to feel so nervous about using a public restroom that they simply cannot go; but, is that an age-appropriate response for an adult?? Methinks no.


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## cloister2

Yeah reminds me of when I was a kid and could not get a ketchup packet from the McDonalds cashier. At the time my Dad snapped at me "you're so bashful!" Gee that was helpful. I don't know why but that behavior made sense at that age.


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## donttalkmuch

sda said:


> Yeah most definitely. Even in my 30s I feel like a child, and at times act it.
> 
> It feel odd and weird when people refer to me as a man. Like one some little kid was blocking my way, his farther (probably my age or younger) said "please let that man pass through". The word man, that sounded so odd.
> 
> I know what you mean about leadership, especially at work. I been doing this type of job for a better part of a decade, yet I feel like a young grad/intern. In fact it feels so odd when young grads come in a within 6months or a year they look like they command more presence and show leadership than me! Leadership scares me.
> 
> What I am meant to be at this stage in my career (and of course life) scares me.
> 
> I certainly can understand the isolation. People around me, are so adult. They are in relationships, getting married, living life.
> Here I am sitting here being scared of what I am and what I am meant to be in this stage of my life.


I feel the exactly the same way when I think of myself being a woman or lady, or someone refers to me that way. SA has me so stunted that I feel like a child in an adult body. I totally feel like a girl, not a grown up. I've never felt like one, and I'm 32.


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## BeeBug

This thread makes me feel loads better. I thought I was the only one.


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## BeeBug

tennislover84 said:


> I do feel stuck in childhood, because I find it very difficult to relate to most people my own age. They all have careers, cars, children, some are married and living together. I don't have any of those experiences, so I feel completely lost trying to make conversation! And I don't feel like I'm "ready" for most of those things, despite people much younger than me already being there. Anxiety has cut short a lot of the natural development of skills and experiences, that I would have acquired otherwise.
> 
> But at the same time, I often feel more mature in other ways. I don't feel I can relate to many people much younger than me either. Argh...


Precisely! :yes


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## Andre

Alright, well I feel compelled to reply to this thread because I am somewhat childlike and pretty much all the stuff you're all saying rings true for me, but at the same time I don't really give a **** anymore. I mean, I want to be thought of as an adult, so when someone calls me sir I think, let them call me sir, even if it sounds archaic. I've missed out on a lot, but I certainly am and feel enough like an adult at age 27.

Idk, I've always been more mature is some ways and less in others. I see modern Western society as childlike as a whole. This uncertainty about taking a stand on adult matters. It really is an adolescent, naive culture. Being an adult is just about maintaining confidence, or faking it when you are not. It's really not that hard to fake (and make).

People are all basically children constantly one upping and belittling one another, while being polite. It's just a game.


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## Witan

As far as how I feel about myself, I stopped aging during senior year of high school. I don't feel any older than I did then.


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## dust3000

When I was in highschool, I felt as though I was an old lady. I was never interested in things other teens were such as socialising, but I liked reading.

Now, I feel like maybe an inexperienced 21 year old.
I still have not developed a career, never dated, never moved out of home.
I'd say those three things would help me feel more adult.

I think I am still stuck in childhood, because there are still some things from there that I haven't gotten over. Just today, I was thinking of a memory from 15 years ago of something someone said that I was bothered by... 15 years ago!

And I think of things that happened when I was working four years ago. I think I need a way to process those things and move on or think of the present or future like other people do.


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## ravens

I'm 41 and I live with my parents. I've never had a girfriend, and never have had sex. I don't feel like I'm in my 40's. I feel the same way I did when I graduated high school.


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## On5thThought

I can definitely relate to this topic: When I do have the nerve to conversation with others my age, I have to remind myself that my age is the same as theirs; if not older!


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## ShyFish

I'm still stuck at about 14-years-old in many ways. Way too concerned about people's opinions of me, no confidence, no direction in life, no real identity, no passions, no responsibilities, no courage, no social skills, no life experience, weighted down with crippling depression and anxieties, no sexual experience or even a set sexual identity, prone to daydreaming and living in a fantasy world, rebellious but with no way to use that improve myself. I still see myself as my parent's child wrought with the insecurities of early adolescent. Problem is I'm 36-years-old now. What a horrid fake person I am. This is worse than an horror movie. What a wasteful life I've had and will continue to have unless something ignites inside of me. You can't "will" yourself out of a mess like this.


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## howard26

Parts of me are very young; like the shy part, and spending lots of time on hobbies rather than responsible things. I also don't dress up alot. On the flip side, i do old man things like feeding birds, sitting on the patio in my underwear, waking up very early, avoiding parties, and getting mad at the guy riding his motorcycle in the neighborhood, or boom boom cars.


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## patheticiq

howard26 said:


> and spending lots of time on hobbies rather than responsible things


I spend a lot of time to decide which dvd,blueray films I should buy to watch or from where to eat today , follow which transfers will make my favourate team this season , if I have to buy season ticket this season or not , where to go with my car for riding , should I buy a game console to spend time or not vs ..... like I am 16-17 years old ....Doing responsible things ? No


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## laine73

*I can relate..*

I am 38, 39 in May and at times I feel old when I am sick or exhausted and out of shape or 18-20 when I feel great about myself. I did marry at a young age, 21, had my daughter the year after. I feel I did not experience young life so at times I long for a carefree life. There are times where people say I look young and act young for my age. I love dancing, modern music, corny or girly movies. My husband is 40 and loves Anime cartoons. So I feel as a couple we don't relate to many our age.

However, although our kids see this side of us, we also enforce rules and things that contradict what we have done in life. We did not complete college, we are not homeowners, I do not have my license. We strive to install in our children to do better than us. They see our struggles *although we do our best and they do not do without the basic necessities*


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## PickleNose

All my life I've felt like I was perpetually 17 or so. It's been even worse the last few years since I can't drive anymore. Now I feel like I'm 14.


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## Mlochail

Twenty-oner invading here!

It's a relief to read this thread, becaues I can relate, a lot! I feel and act 14-16, heck sometimes even 12. Although this makes me realize I must act now... I must hook on the chains of life before it has passed me, and the pace isn't slowing down either...

Hmmm. 

*hopes for a miracle* = doomed -.- I shall go now.


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## cloister2

I don't know why I have a hard time working, applying myself, and having friendships. Unless it's because of some personality flaw it could just be that I never really grew up.


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## MobiusX

i want to go back, please, I WANT TO GO BACK


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## dust3000

I wish I could take the knowledge I have now and shoot it into the brain of my younger self.


That socially/careerwise/lifewise I am at the same stage as someone six years younger than me is a source of insecurity for me.


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## Talgonite

dust3000 said:


> I wish I could take the knowledge I have now and shoot it into the brain of my younger self.
> 
> That socially/careerwise/lifewise I am at the same stage as someone six years younger than me is an source of insecurity for me.


Same here. It's weird cuz when I was 21 I felt more mature than I do now. I didn't drink or party or any of that stuff. Around 22-23 I started partying and doing all kinds of crazy stuff, I feel like I regressed. 

I'm getting my act together though. Joined the military and am gonna be learning some real world skillz.  Ultimate goal is to become a physical therapist, just gotta take one step at a time.


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## cloister2

I think the fact I life with my parents shows there is something wrong there... socially underdeveloped and career-wise nothing. Sadly this is the state everyone else seems to be in too.


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## BusWithSquareWheels

gone


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## BusWithSquareWheels

gone


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## jimkon1479

howard26 said:


> Parts of me are very young; like the shy part, and spending lots of time on hobbies rather than responsible things. I also don't dress up alot. On the flip side, i do old man things like feeding birds, sitting on the patio in my underwear, waking up very early, avoiding parties, and getting mad at the guy riding his motorcycle in the neighborhood, or boom boom cars.


I like this guy


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## Biggles

Funny, I have always looked much younger than I am (still do). I was always behind everyone else it seemed in experience. Voice didn't break till I was 17, didn't have to shave hardly until late 20's. I was VERY self conscious about it all. I'm sure it was a big factor in my development of SA. Once when I was 26 I was asked for my ID in a bar where the drinking age was 19+. I hated it all. Girls my age didn't seem to want to know me because they thought i was too young, immature. It's more fun now. I'm 55 and people think I'm in my late 30's, early 40's. I rarely correct them :boogie. I get interest from late 20's early 30's women which is great, but still, it scares the hell out of me. Not sure I could keep up energy wise or have enough in common. And I fear when they or their parents find out my true age they will want to kill me (I may be older than their parents). No to mention the overall anxiety from SA when I even think about dating again.

But I think it is OK to look, dress act younger than you are. So long as you don't do too many wreckless immature things. Inside in many ways i don't feel any older than 25. But I'm a lot wiser than I was at that age.


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## burrito

it really is great to see Im not the only one who is worried about this. At times i feel like Im not where I should be, compared to my friends at least. But then the more I think about it Im kindof glad Im not like them. Sometimes its hard but you need to worry less about what everyone else is doing to be able to focus on what you need to do. there is no one right way to live life. Just my take on it.


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## Howlett

My manager said I'm still 12. He said he was kidding but I know he wasn't.


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## quietly

sda said:


> It feel odd and weird when people refer to me as a man. Like one some little kid was blocking my way, his farther (probably my age or younger) said "please let that man pass through". The word man, that sounded so odd.


haha, that feel. the first time this happened to me I got really bummed out. 
"Man"? Feels like my life is over when people call me that.
Finally I understand the age-complexes of my parents. Wish I could take back all the times I called them "old".

It's funny how we often don't appreciate something until it's gone. I would commit gruesome murders just to relive my childhood, if even for one day...


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## Kinos Journey

I actually hated turning 30. Before, everyone would say 'at least you're in your twenties' but now, when I still get that, it's sort of '.... ah ha ha ha i'm thirty'.

I don't think 30 is old. It's just that I keep feeling that I'm supposed to be having two kids, a husband, a house, and that I know Everything. ..... The thing is, I don't want kids, I've got major trust issues when it comes to relationships, and I'm nowhere close to knowing Everything.


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## Hamster12

I can really relate to this. I feel like I'm finally going through adolescence now and I'm 46. I'm finally understanding what it's all about. I know it's all about power now. I never knew that before. I also know people wear masks of civility - big smile, light voice, banal banter about the weather etc. - to avoid exposing themselves in case they appear different from the group or in case they unwittingly cause offence, or to avoid getting emotionally involved. 

I never really looked to role models. But in the last few years I have begun to. Through observing various personalities - their voices, their appearance, their mannerisms, I think I finally know who I am now. Mainly through rejecting lots of possible identities that I wouldn't find acceptable for me. I think that's what other people do in adolescence. 

And I'm not who I thought I was at all. I've realised that I don't have to be the me I have been since however long ago. Who says that was the real me? I think I just never found my voice. That could happen for lots of reasons such as critical parents or no one listening. It's not really faking it though, it's expressing yourself without exposing yourself.


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## Awkto Awktavious

Yeah, on the inside I'm a wide eyed, naive, gullible kid who looks up to everybody and can't make big decisions, or think for myself. 

But I'm slowly growing out of it.


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## wnt2chng

Awkto, I'm the same as you and I'm age 48. Very depressing.


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## sayit

Stuck in childhood. In my head I am still 13 year old. In my body I am 44 year old.
At 13 I joined religious freaks and got into saved bandwagon.
Its taken decades reconstructing my mind.
I am not yet healed. I have no life. No career. No family. No sex life. My porn searches still read teen riding a big d#$k. 
How worse can a life be?


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## railcar82594

Wow, bumping up a five year old thread. 
That said I guess I wouldn't mind relieving life from 5 years old with all my memory and current awareness intact, though I'd feel horrible knowing what was coming to the world and not knowing what to do about it.


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## HopeForHeart

At 42 I still feel like a teenager in so many ways. The best years of my life was from 15 to 19, I wish could go back to that time. It almost seems once you become an adult you don't matter anymore especially if you don't become successful, get married, and have children.


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## probably offline

I think that I still carry fear from childhood, but I wouldn't say that I'm stuck _in_ it. I'm not naive like a child even though I might act a bit "younger" than my age, sometimes.


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## flesh

cloister2 said:


> I don't know why I have a hard time working, applying myself, and having friendships. Unless it's because of some personality flaw it could just be that I never really grew up.


I have the same problem and I'm convinced it's ADD (attention deficit disorder) and APD (avoidant personality disorder). Anxiety is just a mere consequence of isolation.


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## what2do

Same here.
All my friends have moved onto jobs, marriages and having kids. I am pretty much the same as I was in my teens or early 20's. Sometimes I feel like I am holding onto my childhood. 

My mom passed away when I was 18, and my dad has been always distant, so I think I didn't know how to be a grown up and navigate in the adulthood without ANY guidance. 

I wish I could be more responsible and disciplined but that's long gone. 
I like this 'youthful' part of me, feeling more playful and I don't have desire to have a family, but I hate that I can't progress well in career- always intimidated and nervous, never very clear and independent.
I do want to change, but don't know how to.


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## truant

No, but when this thread started a few of the users here were still children.

I think I mentally age about half the rate I physically age, because I feel like I'm about 22.


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