# thinking about quitting because there're too many parties



## monotonous (Feb 1, 2013)

and my boss kept asking me to go every time (like some bosses don't give a **** but mine is like the opposite), but there's no way can go, i'm completely isolated at work, if i go i'd look like a complete loser, sit alone on the bus, sit alone at the party, like highschool all over again, well **** dat, plus i don't want to see people who are richer and happier than me, what am i gonna do come home and kill myself afterwards?


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## Sparkle0 (May 23, 2015)

Where do you work? Are the people older than you? I prob would ditch work parties as well. I've never had a normal job though lmao


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

What kind of work has parties?


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## Riri11 (Mar 24, 2013)

:hug 

Go


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## Strategist (May 20, 2008)

Maybe go and follow your boss around like you're attached at the hip. Maybe then he'll stop bothering you.


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## Reckoner7 (Jan 29, 2007)

Maybe you are isolated at work as everyone is socialising at these parties and striking up friendships. Try to go to at least one and see how it goes.


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## thinkstoomuch101 (Jun 7, 2012)

I'd check out one party. As Reckoner7 stated. If it doesn't float your boat, then don't repeat the disaster hoping it will get better. At least you would have investigated before making your decisions.

Love the title of the thread by the way.. it gave me a good chuckle:lol


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## SofaKing (May 9, 2014)

Yeah, I can't stand the forced socialization of work parties, team building events, etc. However, it's one of those things that I had to just suck up and do. Assuming you have public transportation handy or your own vehicle, you can always make an appearance so people see that you made it there, but duck out early. Most people don't pay enough attention to notice that you left. Sometimes, though, you have to wait long enough to get through some of the BS speeches, awards, etc., where visibility is the most important.


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## omniamis (Apr 17, 2015)

Oh wow, my old boss I had while working at an AMC theater was the same way. I actually got called into his office because he felt that I wasn't making an effort to "become a part of the family" -_- Mind you right after the little meeting I brought it up to the people that were on shift at the time and they all said they considered me a friendly person. The reason I never wanted to go to the parties or special employee screenings because it was a "turnt up" group of folks. Like after hours the line between employer and employee was completely erased and they'd all talk freely about getting high, hooking up and getting drunk. I actually felt that me going to one of the parties would hurt more than help my employment because I'm straight edge, no smoking, drugs or drinking, and I'd probably come off as even more of a standoffish *****


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## OutsideR1 (Mar 13, 2014)

A job I had a few years ago had a christmas work party...I quit a week before.


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## JohnCrack (Jan 11, 2014)

wow I'm jealous....a job with parties!!! well I'd go if I were you...now don't get me wrong I have more issues than you (Anxiety, Bipolar, Paranoid personality, PTSD) but a party sounds fun and a great escaper from all the stress...I'd go for the food area, the drinks, the party favors!


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## OutsideR1 (Mar 13, 2014)

JohnCrack said:


> wow I'm jealous....a job with parties!!! well I'd go if I were you...now don't get me wrong I have more issues than you (Anxiety, Bipolar, Paranoid personality, PTSD) but a party sounds fun and a great escaper from all the stress...I'd go for the food area, the drinks, the party favors!


No one with true sa would say "yay a job with parties" lol


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## librarycat (May 24, 2015)

We just have cake. All the time.


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## monotonous (Feb 1, 2013)

OutsideR1 said:


> A job I had a few years ago had a christmas work party...I quit a week before.


you are the man. i'm thinking i'm just gonna do what i want from now on, i can find another job the second day anyways


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## AHolivier (Aug 6, 2009)

.


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## monotonous (Feb 1, 2013)

Buckyx said:


> and nobody invites me to a fckin party, life is unfair


i'd be offended too if people in my department were having a party and didn't invite me, which happens al the time by the way. but for this company parties, i'd rather be forgotten


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## Hayman (Dec 27, 2014)

I work at a place where there seems to be lots of social events. I'd say there's one every couple of months. This can range from a simple visit to the local pub on a Friday afternoon to big, full blown nights out, meals e.t.c&#8230; It's just not for me. Whilst they enjoy these little get-togethers, to me it just feels like unpaid overtime. I spend all working week with them. I don't want to spend what precious little private time I have with them also&#8230;

I've been with the company for almost five years and I've lost count of the amount of parties I've been to with them, now. I have literally forced myself to attend these just to try and get on. I've listened to other people's advice of 'getting out more' and 'getting involved'. Apparently, it's the solution to all our problems. Guess what, folks? It's changed absolutely nothing. At these parties, I'm part of the group, but very much made to feel excluded from it. Each time, every time. All I have ever known at these events is that I'm either snubbed, or spoken 'down to' like a child. I'm never included as an equal person. I try to start a conversation, I'm talked over. I try to join in a conversation, I'm the 'invisible man' that no one acknowledges is actually talking. The only time people want to know me is when a joke is being made about me, or someone wants to argue about something I've said or supposedly done/not done. Other than that, I'm basically relegated to sitting in the corner with a beer for an hour or two until I'm bored enough to call for a lift and go home.

As the 'real' me has started to emerge from my 'false' and 'more positive' face I put on (giving me a headache trying to pretend to be sociable), I've noticed the amount of invites to these things have dropped off quite significantly. Whilst it's upsetting to be clearly snubbed when it comes to invites now, it's also a relief at the same time. I know it would be a waste of time attending anyway. At least at home I can do things that I want to, rather than sit there bored almost to tears.

I've been a little bit more open about myself in recent months to them and typically, there's absolutely no sympathy whatsoever. All I'm told is to put in "_more effort_" :um. Umm...what do they think I've been doing, exactly?  I try, I'm snubbed. I don't try, they want to insult me. I simply can't win.

I have considered resigning a few times because of all these parties. Every time one is announced or I'm on the way to one, my stress and anxiety dial goes about as far into the red as it can go. This surely can't be healthy for you - despite what medical professionals keep banging on about. However, this would mean I'd have to look for another job and meet more new people. No thanks. Been there, tried that&#8230;


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## Willtochange99 (Nov 24, 2014)

I would suggest either just going to the party and being ok with whatever happens or not going and being ok with that too. For example if you want to be a loner, thats fine, just eat and hang out a bit and then leave. If you decide not to go, make up another excuse and continue with life however it makes you satisfied. If you like the actual work of your job and your SA isn't bad day to day then just ignore the party part. WhO CarEs if you don't go to the parties and don't want to be friends with your coworkers. If they think its weird, F them.


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## Willtochange99 (Nov 24, 2014)

Also, funny title. I LOL'ed


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## OutsideR1 (Mar 13, 2014)

monotonous said:


> you are the man. i'm thinking i'm just gonna do what i want from now on, i can find another job the second day anyways


I'm not saying im overly proud of that heh, but yeah do your own thing man. The company I work for now is bigger so if I dont go, it won't be as big of a deal as a lot of people probablly won't go.


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## Darkness Evanescent (Jul 30, 2014)

My first day on the job there was a sing-along (don't ask) and the residents were all singing, and I look and all the servers are singing too! As a server (that's one of my duties, anyway) my first thought was, "I didn't sign up for this!" I didn't sing that day, but a few days later we had to sing "Happy Birthday" to someone having a birthday and I just went along with it. I'm lucky that it got easier. Maybe going to parties here and there (and making excuses when you really, really don't want to) will help you get used to it so that it will at least become tolerable. Those kind of social obligations (at work or at school) suck but they're necessary.



Great. said:


> Maybe go and follow your boss around like you're attached at the hip. Maybe then he'll stop bothering you.


lol I love this idea haha.


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## SofaKing (May 9, 2014)

Darkness Evanescent said:


> My first day on the job there was a sing-along (don't ask) and the residents were all singing, and I look and all the servers are singing too! As a server (that's one of my duties, anyway) my first thought was, "I didn't sign up for this!" I didn't sing that day, but a few days later we had to sing "Happy Birthday" to someone having a birthday and I just went along with it. I'm lucky that it got easier. Maybe going to parties here and there (and making excuses when you really, really don't want to) will help you get used to it so that it will at least become tolerable. Those kind of social obligations (at work or at school) suck but they're necessary.
> 
> lol I love this idea haha.


Did you have at least 14 pieces of flare?


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## LaSmalllFry (May 1, 2015)

I worked at a summer camp when I was younger and a lot of the older workers would always go out and party and they'd invite me even though I knew my parents wouldn't let me go anywhere. I always declined because of that but the invite always made me feel better. In the end, I didn't miss anything. A lot of times at parties, people are all so cliqued up that not everyone is on the same page the next day anyways. I say go and see how one is. If you're nervous about going alone, drag a family member along. You can always leave if you're not really feeling it. That way, you can know it their parties are a hit or miss.


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