# What's a Decent Age to Start Living On Your Own?



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

I'm going to turn 21 in April and I'm starting to feel that I'm a bit old to still be living at home. How old is too old when it comes to these things?


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## FadeToOne (Jan 27, 2011)

when you get a job and can support yourself.

If you're living off your parents money, it doesn't prove anything.


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## caflme (Jun 7, 2009)

In the 80s... I would have said 18 years old... but now things are so much more complicated and expensive. I don't know how anyone moves out before 20-25 nowadays, especially if they don't have friends to rent a place with. I never could stand the thought of roommates but in 1983 I was still able to get a decent 1 bedroom apartment for $175-$235/month... furnished. By decent I mean good safe neighborhood and a clean place with a good landlord.


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## Ape in space (May 31, 2010)

Doesn't really matter when. I moved away at 24 to start grad school in another city. It depends on your circumstances. I think as long as you are on some kind of track to your career, etc., living with your parents well into your 20s is no big deal. In other non-Western cultures it is normal to be living with your parents as an adult, but you would be contributing to the finances. So you shouldn't be ashamed of living with your parents.


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## ImmortalxApathy (Feb 19, 2011)

The answer is simple: You're never too old. People think that something is wrong with you if you still live at home. Who cares. I'm 27 and I still live with my Mom.


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## mismac (Oct 27, 2005)

When you're working and no longer in school.


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## hiimnotcool (Apr 28, 2009)

Yep. I think it's more irresponsible to move out and not be able to support yourself then to live at home because you're not financially set enough to do so. I think most people feel like they 'have' to move out or else they're losers but that just simple isn't the case.


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## confidencelost (Sep 3, 2010)

You are too old to be living with your parents when you feel you are too old to be doing so.

My brother is 33 and lives here and doesn't care one bit as far as I know. He has an active social life, unimpaired by the fact he lives with our parents.

Meanwhile, I'm 23 and I am desperate to move out. I just can't afford to right now. I feel like living with my parents restricts me socially even more than my social anxiety and is probably blocking my progress at this point.

A matter of perspective.


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## mismac (Oct 27, 2005)

Ashkat said:


> well when I use to tell my co workes that my mom lived with me and my sister. they would tell me that I needed to get my own place, that I made enough money. But I hate when people assume because they make an *** of themselve and they don't even know the half of it and the reason my mom stays with us..smh...people are so ****ing stupid.


People just assume you're a loser when they hear you live with your parents...never occurred to them that maybe the parents are living with their children...

My grandparents live with my uncle because they can't afford to live on their own. It's a cultural thing.


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## KennethJones (Jun 22, 2009)

A decent age to start living alone? There is no such thing. No matter how old you are, you start living alone when you make enough money to pay for an apartment/house, car, and utilities. That can be at age 16 or 30. 

Whether you can do it or not depends on your own financial status


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## JamieHasAnxiety (Feb 15, 2011)

I'm 21 in March 22, and well, I left home around 17. 

But it varys from person to person, it doesnt always have to deal with 'still being at home'.
Some people with SA prefer to be with family because it makes them feel safe. I would rather move in with family than to live alone.


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## quiet0lady (Sep 29, 2009)

I know a lot of people who still live with their parents well into their 20s. It's really not that big of a deal and a good way to save money. Personally, I moved out when I was 17, lived on my own for awhile then ended up moving back in with my parents. It wasn't until recently that I moved out again and I'm 22.


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

Dude, a lot of people who are 21 are still in college and therefore live at home. Uhm, I would say 23-25 maybe. It's difficult to put an age on that sort of thing. Anyway, there is no shame in living with your folks if you must (I have to say this...I'm moving back in with mine. :cry). Independence is wonderful though, so when you have an opportunity try it out!


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

confidencelost said:


> You are too old to be living with your parents when you feel you are too old to be doing so.


This. While I have good parents, I'm 23, and for me it's time.


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## RUFB2327 (Sep 28, 2008)

I still live at home, but I dont really feel pressure to move out since I'm still in school. The only times I feel like I need to get out is when my step-dad is getting on my nerves or up my a**. I'm not his biggest fan and sometimes he can be a complete a**hole. Because of his old-school mentality sometimes I think I have to move out the day I finally finish college.


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## Emanresu (Jun 2, 2010)

56


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## daniel1989 (Feb 14, 2011)

It's not an age it's when you can afford it, I'm not moving out until after i graduate and have a full time job with enough savings to buy a place.


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## copper (Nov 10, 2003)

I lived at home when I was going to college and a year after. I was working direct care jobs in group homes after college so I didn't make enough money to move out on my own esp if I moved to Des Moines where I work. The cost of living there is pretty high compared to where my parents lived, but you had to commute 40 miles one way so transportation ate away your budget. I ended up landing a decent job in another state when I was 25.


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## CeilingStarer (Dec 29, 2009)

I was 25. Like others have said, it's down to finances... and for us SA-types, this can be one of the hardest things to get in order.


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## Implicate (Feb 1, 2011)

If you hate your parents, the day you turn 18 is when you move out if you weren't smart enough to get out before then 

Just don't go out and like...buy a house at 20 and be stuck with it forever and want to burn it down every day. BAD PLAN!


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

18. Learn real life by living it.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Birth - get out while you can.


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## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

I'd say 45, give or take a year.


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## purplefruit (Jan 11, 2011)

I don't think there's a specific age. As soon as you are ready to leave, it's time. I've been feeling that way for a few years but haven't had the money to get out. I'm almost there.

I'd say DO NOT rush to leave if you're not 100% financially ready...I have a cousin who moved in with her boyfriend, racked up a ton of debt, then they moved into an expensive apartment, then moved into an even more expensive place for no reason, I guess because she had a full time job she was feeling good, but he was a student the whole time and they were both paying off tuition loans :roll They couldn't afford the place, so they moved back in with her poor (literally) mother a while after :roll Dumb.

So first of all be mentally ready, then get your finances in order, then get the heck outta there. You might be 18 or 30 when it happens, who knows.


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## Comfortably Miserable (Oct 24, 2010)

Im still living at home and Ill be 24 in april. I wont to move out so bad but everything around here is so expensive! I WILL move out this year thought, It has to happen.


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## iuseings (Nov 11, 2009)

Well there isn't a rule book, but with normal social development and accordance to societal expectations, it is usually considered some time in your 20's. It does depend on your parents attitude though and stuff like cultural input, like if you came from a jewish or Italian background.
Like others have said, you should move out when you feel like you should be. I moved out when I was 20/21 cause I went to live with my boyfriend. That is also another thing to consider... Most people once they reach 18 move out with friends or a partner (probably better to do with friends) or move away for college. 
It's healthy to be on your own, I think, and even if you do end up moving back with your parents.. You'll learn more about yourself and probably enjoy the independence.


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## Jessie203 (Feb 20, 2008)

I'm 21 and want out too. Was going to leave beginning of the year, went apartment hunting, but I'm delaying it now for another 6 months minimum.


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## Bobred (Feb 26, 2011)

As other posters have pointed out finances are the most important thing to think about. I was 19 when I moved out but financially I wasn't really ready for it and I got into a bit of a debt that took me a few years to sort out.


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## eejm (Jan 22, 2010)

Everyone's circumstances vary due to finances, level of independence, schooling, health, etc. Some never do it. But I agree with the idea of being ready to leave when you feel like you are ready to leave.

Me? I was ready at, oh, 12. I think I'd have been able to take care of myself just fine if money hadn't been an issue. As it happened, I did at 18 and I was more than ready.


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## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

I have the financial capability to move out, but I don't know if I have the emotionally capability. Last time I lived alone I OD'd on pain meds and spent a week in the hospital. Am I stronger now? Plus my only friend in the area is engaged and living with his finance. And strangers are a no chance situation. **** it, I'm moving out. this spring.


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## nycdude (Mar 20, 2010)

FadeToOne said:


> *when you get a job and can support yourself.*
> 
> If you're living off your parents money, it doesn't prove anything.


Agree, i currently live with my parents. we get along together.


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## viv (Feb 8, 2009)

Eliza said:


> I don't think there's a specific age. As soon as you are ready to leave, it's time.
> 
> I'd say DO NOT rush to leave if you're not 100% financially ready.
> 
> So first of all be mentally ready, then get your finances in order, then get the heck outta there. You might be 18 or 30 when it happens, who knows.


I agree with Eliza.


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

I turn 38 in April and have never lived on my own ever.

Don't have any specific plans to move out. Most likely I'll be removed by death, but that could be anywhere between today and 50 years from now.


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## rctriplefresh5 (Aug 24, 2009)

Ashkat said:


> well when I use to tell my co workes that my mom lived with me and my sister. they would tell me that I needed to get my own place, that I made enough money. But I hate when people assume because they make an *** of themselve and they don't even know the half of it and the reason my mom stays with us..smh...people are so ****ing stupid.


the way you say this sounds like it;s your sister's and your house. it is your mom's house. you and your sister are living with your mom, not your mom is living with you and your sis


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

millenniumman75 said:


> Birth - get out while you can.


 That's sad.


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## tweedyrat (Jan 8, 2011)

confidencelost said:


> You are too old to be living with your parents when you feel you are too old to be doing so.
> 
> My brother is 33 and lives here and doesn't care one bit as far as I know. He has an active social life, unimpaired by the fact he lives with our parents.
> 
> ...


My older sister moved back in _with her boyfriend_ and they don't seem to be bothered. I, on the other hand, am feeling very restricted by living at home. If I was to date someone I would have to put up with teasing, my mom always wants to know where I am etc. I don't go out much, of course, but I feel it would actually be easier if I didn't have to worry about these things on top of SA.


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## tlgibson97 (Sep 24, 2009)

I moved out 2 mo's after my 18th B-day. Was married, 1 child. I could have stayed home and milked my mother but I wanted to get out and be an adult and be self sufficient. It was extremely difficult, especially working full time and going to school full time but I did what I had to do. This was between 97-03 so it wasn't too terribly long ago. 

I think a big issue today is parents aren't willing to push their little birdys out of the nest. It's an awakening the start from the bottom and work your way up. Every challenge and struggle you go through makes you stronger and more able to handle challenges in the future. I made plenty of mistakes and had a lat of learning experiences that make me more wise today.

So I say everyone should strive to leave home at 18. I know everyones circumstances are different but make a plan to leave as soon as possible. Parents will let you stay there forever so you have to motivate yourself to leave. I think many just don't want to give up the good thing they have because they don't want to start at the bottom.


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## Bbpuff (Sep 1, 2010)

I would say 23 - 25 would be a decent age to move out. Just once you start hitting late 20s - early 30s, it gets to be a little weird..


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## BetaBoy90 (Jan 5, 2010)

Make a realistic goal for yourself when you can move out comfortably on your own and work towards that goal. Whenever you stall towards that goal, as it's probably going to happen, accept the fact that you delayed at that moment and still push yourself to leave at around the same time as before, but to a less comfortable living arrangement. Over time assuming you stick to such a plan you'll hold yourself responsible for when fall backwards, and take it as a learning experience. 

I don't think there is a right age to move out btw. Every person is different, as long as you are pushing yourself in life and not just accepting defeat. Even if it means overcoming SA before you attempt to work on the financials of moving out, it's better than giving up.


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## angus (Dec 18, 2010)

I was 27 when I got my own pad.


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## Tawnee (Sep 2, 2010)

I don't think there is any right age. You move out when you are financially able to move out. I am 21, and I'm only just now looking to lease my first apartment. And still for the first year I will not be able to pay for it. My family and my student loans will be (because I have one more year of school left). After that, hopefully I'll have a job and be able to pay for my apartment on my own. Hopefully. :|


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## Mae West (Sep 15, 2005)

When you have the money.


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