# Self-group- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is Simple



## AlekParker (Oct 31, 2006)

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is quite simple. The part that's harder to overcome is being dedicated to it and making it a habit in your life that is difficult. Even when you feel like it's not working, even when you feel bad, even when you feel anxious you still do it, and you counter your negative thoughts.

You have to be persistent and keep learning from CBT and eventually APPLY IT TO REAL LIFE SITUATIONS.

I've done CBT in real life a few times. The below information is what the cognitive aspect is all about. The thing is you have to repeat this over and over until you condition yourself to think differently. Less negatively and more rationally. That's as simple as it is. Then the behavioral part involves applying these thoughts and taking action gradually.

Anyways heres the more important part of the cognitive therapy I wanted to share. This is actually the main cognitive restructuring that we did in my one-on-one CBT therapy and it is very helpful if you apply it to many situations and repeat it over and over.

This is simple but very important for recognizing Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs) that you have personally. We have to recognize our own PERSONAL ANT's thoughts, so that we can use cognitive restructuring to counter them.

The main concept of cognitive therapy is that we have negative thoughts that are irrational--meaning they are not realistic nor do they help us in life. These thoughts need to be countered with more neutral realistic, rational thoughts:

**Social anxiety is associated with Irrational anxious thoughts or automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) which come in 2 main forms:

1. Over-estimating the chance that negative things will happen in social situations: You think that bad things are more likely to happen then in reality. (ie: "I'll make a mistake/ act awkward / come off in a bad light/ or have a panic attack... if I talk to people")

2. Over-estimate the cost of negative events in social situations: You put too much importance on the cost or outcome of the bad thing happening in the social situation. (ie If I make a mistake/ act awkward / come off in a bad light/ or have a panic attack... theneveryone will think I'm useless / uncool / unworthy / or not want to be my friend)

These seem simple, and a lot of you understand that we have these ANTs thoughts. The next time you go out or are about to do something social, think about the odds and probabilities that you are over-estimating in the situation. 

You can write down your ANT's thought, then write down a more realistic 1. ESTIMATION OF A NEGATIVE THING HAPPENING and 2. ESTIMATION OF THE NEGATIVE THING HAPPENING AND IT'S COST/ EFFECT ON YOU

EXAMPLE of Negative Thought: "When I stand in line at the grocery store people behind me are staring at me, (judging or looking down on me)."

COUNTERING the Negative Thought-

Realistic odds of negative occurance: 
Really people are most likely to be in their own heads thinking about anything from what they're buying to their own insecurities. It's not very likely that they're staring at me when there are 20 other people around. It's more likely that they're just staring straight ahead at the cash register minding their own business.

Odds of the COST of something negative actually occurring:
So let's say someone is staring at you. So what? Does it really matter? There's a chance they are admiring you. There's also a small chance they are judging you, but still unlikely. BUT in that case does that really matter? If they think of you negatively then that's their own problem. They must have nothing else better do to then judge others. Will this really affect who I am as a person in the long run or even short run? "

So really you have to use your own common sense to think about and question these negative anxiety thoughts more rationally. The odds of negative things occuring and the odds of those negative things actually causing some harm or cost to you.

After doing this a few times it can become automatic. Soon you'll be countering thoughts all the time, and eventually you will learn to automatically counter them, or internalize the rational thoughts.

If you want to learn more about cognitive and behavioral therapy CBT then click the second link below and you can learn to be your own therapist, or use it with professional therapy.

We meet 3 times a week, work on cognitive behavioral therapy and will do exposures over time over video- and text-chat rooms.


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