# Is this a bad psychologist?



## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

I've had a couple sessions with this psychologist and after a couple of months of being lazy I decided to go back recently. Here I shall list what happened during my session:

-She told me this story of a caterpillar that created a cocoon to turn into a butterfly. When the time came, it started struggling to get out of its cocoon. A man walking by saw and felt bad for its struggle so he cut the cocoon open. Because it came out prematurely, the butterfly became very fat with small wings. If it only did struggle, it would've had big wings and a small body like a beautiful butterfly. I guess the point of her story was to try not to rush getting over my SA or I'd look foolish.
-She said I could be the "quiet emo type" when in major social situations and more outgoing in the others that I'm more comfortable in.
-She told me that I didn't need to be the "life of the party" like Justin Timberlake, who is way out there.
- When I asked her to diagnose me with mental illness such as SA, asperger, OCD, etc.(she later corrected the word "illness" because of asperger), she said "well that's what I do!"
-She told me to trust the psychiatrist with what he gives me even though she admitted to knowing almost nothing about medications.

On more postive notes, she:
-Said I was "cool" (probably because of my good looks and because I've really given in lately to the whole "pick-up artist" sort of thing).
-Told me I have "the tools" for overcoming SA.
-Admitted to being sort of a prick because of the questions I brought on a piece of paper.
-Told me that working out and exercising would be good for my SA with no side effects.


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## pjm1978 (Sep 28, 2009)

Yeah that psychologist sucks just like one i went to see. The clown that i saw thought he could fix my anxiety with relaxing music that sounded like elevator music.


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## Lisa (Jul 8, 2006)

rawrboy64 said:


> -She told me this story of a caterpillar that created a cocoon to turn into a butterfly. When the time came, it started struggling to get out of its cocoon. A man walking by saw and felt bad for its struggle so he cut the cocoon open. Because it came out prematurely, the butterfly became very fat with small wings. If it only did struggle, it would've had big wings and a small body like a beautiful butterfly. I guess the point of her story was to try not to rush getting over my SA or I'd look foolish.


I dont think she meant that you would look foolish. I think she meant that you wouldn't be quite 'finished' = your development not quite completed. A fat butterfly would be less successful at life than one that had taken its time to grow strong.



rawrboy64 said:


> -She said I could be the "quiet emo type" when in major social situations and more outgoing in the others that I'm more comfortable in.


That's ok too, I think. Most people are like that anyway - more outgoing and confident in familiar situations and quieter and more reserved in unfamiliar company.



rawrboy64 said:


> -She told me that I didn't need to be the "life of the party" like Justin Timberlake, who is way out there.


Like her comment above this sounds like she was trying to suggest ways in which you could be more comfortable with who you are.



rawrboy64 said:


> - When I asked her to diagnose me with mental illness such as SA, asperger, OCD, etc.(she later corrected the word "illness" because of asperger), she said "well that's what I do!"


That was the third time you saw her? She probably doesnt know you well enough to diagnose you yet. I think that's a good thing! I have read posts by people who have had chats with psychologists for 50min and were then diagnosed with personality disorders (!!) For a reliable disgnosis they need to know you better.



rawrboy64 said:


> -She told me to trust the psychiatrist with what he gives me even though she admitted to knowing almost nothing about medications.


Most psychologists know very little about medication. It would be counterproductive of her to instill any anxiety/ distrust towards your psychiatrist. Unless you have a reason to mistrust him/ her I wouldnt get sucked into worrying.

I havent written such a detailed post in ages. Hope this helps.

What do others think?


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## deeds14 (Jul 9, 2009)

I would have to agree with Lisa.. I didn't see any problems with anything she said.


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## decodude (Feb 28, 2004)

*My 2 cents*

First off, she sounds like a young psych grad student. She clearly needs more experience. A real psych would never even use lame *** metaphors of the butterflies or even mention the name Justin Timberlake to prove a point. The phrase "quiet emo type" just further proves my point about her youth and inexperience. I highly doubt from what you wrote that she is an experienced enough person to even understand SA. Please correct me if I'm wrong. I think I may be 90% correct here.


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

Using a metaphor, or trendy terms, by themselves doesn't indicate whether she's any good or not. The most effective therapist I saw happened to say similar things. However, she was also very skilled at delivering CBT.

The only real problem I can see is that she recommended trusting the psychiatrist with your medication. Trusting a doctor blindly is clearly not conducive to informed consent. Patients should ensure the doctor provides them with all available treatment options and clearly explains the benefits and drawbacks of each in turn.


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## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

Lisa said:


> That was the third time you saw her? She probably doesnt know you well enough to diagnose you yet. I think that's a good thing! I have read posts by people who have had chats with psychologists for 50min and were then diagnosed with personality disorders (!!) For a reliable disgnosis they need to know you better.


She told me I couldn't have asperger's because I was seeking social interaction and help for my SA whereas people with AS wouldn't. Is this true?


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

^ Thoroughly untrue. I have AS and experience intense social anxiety, for which I sought help. Many with AS seek social interaction. She's ruling out a diagnosis she is unqualified to make; no AS specialist, for example, would make such a comment.


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## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

rocknroll714 said:


> Why'd you post this thread, I'm curious? You've barely even given her a chance.


I was insecure about her mainly because of the "emo" thing and partly because of aspergers. I sorta tried the emo thing in high school and it seemed to backfire though looking back I can kinda see what she meant.


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## Lisa (Jul 8, 2006)

So have you had another session? How is it going?​


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## Madison_Rose (Feb 27, 2009)

I dunno, I don't think she nescessarily sounds bad. On the other hand, I don't know much about it, or about her. If you just really dislike her, then maybe you shouldn't be seeing her whether she's good or bad, because you need someone you feel confident in, someone you can respect and trust.


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## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

odd_one_out said:


> ^ Thoroughly untrue. I have AS and experience intense social anxiety, for which I sought help. Many with AS seek social interaction. She's ruling out a diagnosis she is unqualified to make; no AS specialist, for example, would make such a comment.


How'd you get diagnosed? I'm pretty sure now that I don't have it as rocknroll714 pointed out.



rocknroll714 said:


> You were emo?? Lolz. Remember when I dressed up as an emo kid and tried to pass myself off as scene? Funny **** hahaha.


yup haha good times.



Lisa said:


> So have you had another session? How is it going?


I'm having one on the 29th of this month. Hopefully it'll go well.



Madison_Rose said:


> I dunno, I don't think she nescessarily sounds bad. On the other hand, I don't know much about it, or about her. If you just really dislike her, then maybe you shouldn't be seeing her whether she's good or bad, because you need someone you feel confident in, someone you can respect and trust.


I agree. I'm going to keep seeing her to see if i could be more comfortable.


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## odd_one_out (Aug 22, 2006)

I saw a clinical psychologist who had experience in autism.


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## Blueyedpoppet (Feb 5, 2009)

On a side note, it's been proven that exercise improves mood (so if you are experiencing depression, this probably would be a good out let).

If you don't feel like you're connecting with your therapist, then you don't have to continue therapy with her. I know it's kinda hard switching therapists, but it's about you working through social anxiety. She may be a great therapist, but she might not be the right therapist for you.


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