# Existential crisis as an atheist?



## Charizard (Feb 16, 2011)

It seems like it happens to me on at least a yearly basis.

The main thing seems to be this: right now, I exist. One hundred years from now, I won't. It's not just that I'll be physically dead though. I have all these thoughts, opinions, and experiences... but once I'm gone, they're all gone with me. For example, several months ago my girlfriend's grandfather died. When they were cleaning out his house after the fact, she found a bunch of science magazines and was really surprised. How much interest did he have in this stuff? She didn't know, and she would have asked him about it if he were around for questioning. That aspect of his life is effectively lost data. 

For whatever reason, this hole in the picture upsets me. Entire episodes of my own life are similar holes waiting to happen, the very moment I'm gone. I should clarify that it's not specifically myself that I'm concerned with. I feel the same way about the fact that everyone else will be gone sooner or later as well. If I could make a career out of just interviewing people and writing down everything they tell me, I would do it in a heartbeat.

Anyway, I just dislike feeling this way. It's kind of distracting. I think that I would have an easier time with it if I believed in the abrahamic god. An everlasting soul sounds nice right about now. 

Does anyone else struggle a bit when it comes to being okay with the idea that you will cease to exist as completely as you came into existence?


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## kev (Jan 28, 2005)

Take up absurdism. You can make your own personal meaning out of life.


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## wmw87 (Apr 20, 2011)

> Anyway, I just dislike feeling this way. It's kind of distracting. I think that I would have an easier time with it if I believed in the abrahamic god. An everlasting soul sounds nice right about now.


why would you want to live forever? :blank



> Does anyone else struggle a bit when it comes to being okay with the idea that you will cease to exist as completely as you came into existence?


im fine with not existing. being alive is the tough part.



> Take up absurdism. You can make your own personal meaning out of life


absurdism does not allow for the construction of meaning. :/


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## The Silent 1 (Aug 21, 2011)

Charizard said:


> It seems like it happens to me on at least a yearly basis.
> 
> The main thing seems to be this: right now, I exist. One hundred years from now, I won't. It's not just that I'll be physically dead though. I have all these thoughts, opinions, and experiences... but once I'm gone, they're all gone with me. For example, several months ago my girlfriend's grandfather died. When they were cleaning out his house after the fact, she found a bunch of science magazines and was really surprised. How much interest did he have in this stuff? She didn't know, and she would have asked him about it if he were around for questioning. That aspect of his life is effectively lost data.
> 
> ...


Reading your post reminds me of the classic monologue from Blade Runner:

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I've watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. *All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die*. "

The part in bold really speaks to what your saying, that once you die all your experiences will be lost in the flow of time, "like tears in rain". I'm really not sure what to say, except that you parts of you live on in the ones you leave behind. Even now there are parts of you no one else knows about, no one will ever know all of you, even now.


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## somemvp (Oct 17, 2011)

We all live for the soul purpose of experience. 

Alot of my anxiety stems from thinking about the future. My own future, the future of the Earth, the future of existence ect. I think it's stupid to stress about this, but its easier said than done to control your thoughts. 

The reason people recommend living in the "now" is because these experiences are all that really matter in the long run. 

We are all apart of everything, you are the Earth, you are the big bang, you apart of consciousness. It's natural to fear death. It's instinctual, all animals put survival as their top priority. 

Death doesn't have to be a negative thing, just because we cant comprehend what it is yet. The whole entire universe all works with cycles. We are apart of the consciousness life cycle. Live, experience, die. The cycle is beautiful. 

We will understand completely one day, for now, create experience, live free.


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## anonymous soul (Sep 8, 2011)

kev said:


> Take up absurdism.


^ This.

It can be very freeing to understand that you cannot understand.


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## Jnmcda0 (Nov 28, 2003)

somemvp said:


> We all live for the soul purpose of experience.


I think you meant "sole" purpose. Freudian slip?


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## Thebazilly (Oct 17, 2011)

Just because your accomplishments and thoughts and feelings and whatnot will eventually be lost and forgotten doesn't mean they're without value. It means that you're the one who assigns value to the events in your life, and that you can do things that make you happy while you're able to.

Sure, no one may know that you collected samples of tree bark, or that your favorite month was June, or that you buried your treasure three paces to the West of that creepy statue in the middle of town, but those were things you enjoyed doing, and thus worth doing.

You set your own goals and you meet them. As long as no one gets hurt, get out there and live for living.


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## Josie (Dec 8, 2008)

It doesn't bother me quite so much on a personal level (though it does occur to me), but it does when I think about all of the stories my dad tells me about his life. I'm always encouraging him to write them down, so they can live on-- in _his_ words. I panic a little when I think about him passing one day, and those stories will be in my mind, and my mind only (brother, mom, neither of them cared to listen). No one else will hear those stories- not quite like I heard them.

Maybe no one else would care about his stories, because they don't appreciate him the way I do, because he's my father. But it seems like a shame that good stories would go to waste, lost forever.


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## Haunty (Oct 24, 2008)

Charizard said:


> The main thing seems to be this: right now, I exist. One hundred years from now, I won't. It's not just that I'll be physically dead though. I have all these thoughts, opinions, and experiences... but once I'm gone, they're all gone with me.


But you will still exist  in a different form, nothing is destroyed, including your thoughts, opinions, experiences, etc. They happen on a time line, which travels across the universe.

For examples, the event of my birth is about 30 light years away from Earth right now.


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## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

Charizard said:


> Does anyone else struggle a bit when it comes to being okay with the idea that you will cease to exist as completely as you came into existence?


It's very much an idea I am not okay with.

As a kid, I thought about heaven a lot because I didn't want to think of my family dying and disappearing forever. Only in very recent years have I come to terms with the fact that I don't believe in god, but I still struggle with the whole "death is the end of the road for your conscious self" deal.


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## LynnNBoys (Jul 13, 2011)

Charizard said:


> It seems like it happens to me on at least a yearly basis.
> 
> The main thing seems to be this: right now, I exist. One hundred years from now, I won't. It's not just that I'll be physically dead though. I have all these thoughts, opinions, and experiences... but once I'm gone, they're all gone with me. For example, several months ago my girlfriend's grandfather died. When they were cleaning out his house after the fact, she found a bunch of science magazines and was really surprised. How much interest did he have in this stuff? She didn't know, and she would have asked him about it if he were around for questioning. *That aspect of his life is effectively lost data.*
> 
> ...


I have a hard time with older generations, like my grandparents, dying. I feel like I should've recorded more of my grandfather's stories about WWII, about life in the '30s and '40s, about his parents and grandparents. Same with my husband's grandmother and parents. My husband has lost both his parents and all his grandparents. I have my parents and one grandmother left at least. I'm interested in genealogy and I feel like I've lost so much information with their passing.

I had such high hopes to put together a family tree for my side and husband's side of the family. I hate that the clock is ticking away.

I don't think I've faced the reality of death yet. I know it will happen but I hope that it won't happen for a long time. My grandfather was 90 when he passed away in July. My grandparents would've celebrated 70 years of marriage this coming Valentine's Day. I hope to do as well as they did.


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## Ape in space (May 31, 2010)

Everything that's happening now is part of the dance of the universe. Destruction and regeneration are part of this dance. Trying to hold on to the temporary forms of this life is futile because existence is a dance, not a means to an end. Shift the perspective away from purpose. Take joy in the rhythmic dance of the universe.


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## Propaganda (Oct 26, 2010)

Charizard said:


> Does anyone else struggle a bit when it comes to being okay with the idea that you will cease to exist as completely as you came into existence?


Yes. When my mind wonders in this direction I have to force myself to breathe as my heart plummets. The thought of death follows me as a stalking shadow never to be further than a pain of hunger or desire for sex. It's there, always mocking me, telling me I am nothing but dust, a mere nanosecond in a million year span. Nothing stops it it, love nor hate, it will consume us. Why prolong it's call? Why do anything when you know everything matters not?

.......................I am going to play with kittens, I am sad.


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## mud (Apr 12, 2009)

The body is a complex biological machine that operates through mechanics, electrics, chemistry and other sub-systems.

You car is an somewhat complex inorganic machine that operates through mechanics, electrics, chemistry and other sub-systems.

Your body requires input to operate: water, fuel, oxygen, nutrients that are used for repairs and maintenance.

Your car requires input to operate: water, fuel, oxygen, materials that are used for repairs and maintenance.

Your body has senses and a brain that can process that input, produce data and make decisions and take actions.

Your car has sensors and a processor that can process that input, produce data and make decisions and take actions (such as: deploy airbags). Granted it is a lot less advanced, but it hasn't had the benefit of billions of years of evolution yet.

When your body is "switched off" its biological material begins to decay rapidly. However swift intervention from medical professionals can "restart" your body. If it is left too long it may not be possible to restart. If a major component can longer function it can often be replaced.

When your car is switched off its inorganic material decay very slowly. Eventual intervention from anyone can restart your car. If it is left too long it may not be possible to restart. If a major component can longer function it can usually be replaced.

When your body is "switched off", it is not processing data or producing output. People struggle to understand that this "broken machine" is not producing output because it is no longer functioning and many believe that there is some invisible mystical part of the machine that carries on and processes data and produces (undetectable) output.

When your car is switched off, it is not processing data or producing output. People have no problem understanding that this inactive machine is not producing output because it is no longer functioning and nobody believes that there is some invisible mystical part of the machine that carries on and processes data and produces (undetectable) output.

The point is that nothing "carries on" because there is nothing to carry on. If input produces output, it should be easy to understand that no input produces no output, not invisible output.


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## Knowbody (Jul 5, 2011)

subs


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

It doesn't bother me because I don't exist as it is.

It's disturbing, I suppose, as stories are interesting and you lose the person that lies beyond the facade they take to pass in society - beyond religion and politics and all the other ways society tries to separate us. But you might as well make all that is lost meaningful to you. That's all that really matters.


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## ermor90 (Oct 22, 2011)

If it makes you feel better, think that you are a biological robot and you are not live, becouse nothing is ever alive. Things grow and parts get complicated stuck togheter to work, thats all there is. No magic, althrough it is pretty magical anyway. We need to stop demanding so much from all this, its very simple. I hope I dont sound like I have a dry view of the world and the life, I really dont. Once we accept that everything is simple, atleast for me, I feel very happy becuse I know it doesnt have to me anything more than what I got. I know Im not a living thing, I dont exist, Im just a machine...thats what I think. And I feel totally ok with that, I dont need anything more. Its all a miracle anyway. Hope my philosophy gives you anything.


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