# Phone sessions with my therapist rock



## losinit (Oct 14, 2008)

because i can type out how stupid he is and not wait until I get home.


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## losinit (Oct 14, 2008)

I still have no idea how to manage or reduce my anxiety. my last worthless therapist told me to engage it and ride it out. he says completely ignore it. they're both stump dumb too, so i don't really know which opinion is coming from the more competent one.

my favorite is that he can't understand any scenario that i describe until i've described it at least ten times. and he forgets everything after ten minutes, and then will ask me to confirm misinformation about what i just told him as though he's never heard it before, and i end up explaining it _again_


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## losinit (Oct 14, 2008)

I really think i'm going to have to stop cognitive therapy. they say notice the sensations and recognize that they're just thoughts/schemas/symptoms, etc. that drives me crazy. they say "don't engage in anxiety, you'll just be more anxious. focus on something else". i focus on making friends "don't focus on making friends, you'll seem unnatural". 

meanwhile, i feel schizophrenic constantly correcting my cognitions with these little mantras, that end up just making everything worse.


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## ImAboutToEXPLODE (Nov 20, 2007)

> my last worthless therapist told me to engage it and ride it out. he says completely ignore it.


Do they give out therapist licenses in breafast cereal boxes?

Some people might be able to "ignore it and ride it out", but for other people that is simply not an option.

I think that an important aspect of dealing with irrational thoughts and beliefs (and psychology in general) is that it has to be a very personal experience, not just that a therapist tells you what thoughts and beliefs are wrong, and then you try and simply "ignore" those things.

You have to identify for yourself the irrational beliefs, you have to have moments of realizations where YOU actually understand that some of the thoughts and beliefs you have don't actually conform with reality.

You also have to pinpoint exactly what things are most important, and think about what thoughts and actions you are going to use to counter the irrational thoughts and beliefs.



> i focus on making friends "don't focus on making friends, you'll seem unnatural".


That seems like a somewhat bad advice.Of course you don't wanna come across as unnatural, but focusing on making friends doesn't have to make you seem unnatural.



> meanwhile, i feel schizophrenic constantly correcting my cognitions with these little mantras, that end up just making everything worse.


It's just logical that you would feel a little schizophrenic going against what ingrown beliefs and irrational thoughts tell you.

I thing it's the wrong approach to just say "ignore it" and go about your business (if that's what you're doing).You have to be vigilant, closely monitor your own thoughts and beliefs and emotions.

Another thing i think is vital is to try and have a specific goal in every situation, to have a purpose, to try and see how what you are doing right now is connected to a concrete goal in the future (like really enjoyin a social situation, or even beating social anxiety completely).

It seems that many people here ask themselves "What am i *supposed* to do? What steps do i have to take to get rid of this?", and neglect to ask themselves "What to I want? What do I desire? What is the goal i have in specific situations which i would enjoy achieving?"

Because if you don't answer these questions then you will often find yourself in situations and thinking "i have no purpose here, i have no goal", and then it's easy for negativity to take over, and it's also easy to make the desicion to just get out of the situation.


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## losinit (Oct 14, 2008)

wow, i think that's what two different incompetent therapists have been _trying_ to communicate to me since 2005, and i've never understood what the **** they were talking about. thank you for wording it in a concise way.


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