# What are some positive aspects that resulted from your SA?



## Transcend (Mar 24, 2007)

For a long time I played the victim card; feeling sorry for myself beause of all the missed opportunities and drawbacks resulting from my SA. I would perceive my condition to be a punishment - getting the short end of the stick in life, so to speak. I was mad at the world for how unfair it was for me to be going through this, while plenty of people my age are out, having fun, living a carefree life without any problems. However, eventually I decided to stop moping about all the negative aspects of my SA and think about the good things that came about, instead. After some introspection I began to realize that plenty of good things resulted from my SA. For one, knowing first hand how challenging it could be to live with this condition, I became much more empathetic, understanding and accepting of others than I have been in the past. I have become more open-minded and less judgmental of others and no longer make assumptions about people based on their exterior. 

Because my condition led me to spend a lot of time by myself, I began to read a lot; primarily self-help books in the spirituality genre. My outlook on life, myself, and the world as a whole has completely changed. I became more aware of everything, much more informed, more spiritual and I feel that I have really grown as a person during the last couple of years. I have been living with SA for about four years now, and in these four years I have learned, and progressed spiritually more than I have in all of the 19 years of my life before sa. I became more tolerant of other people's attitudes (positive or otherwise), because I've learned that the way people treat and regard others reflects the way they feel about themselves. I have learned to control my temper and choose my words wisely, even though that can be hard to do at times when the other person is being arrogant or rude. I now know that whatever negative message I direct at someone could potentially hurt them, cause their self-esteem to decrease, and sometimes cause a ripple effect which will create a lot of negativity in their life and in the lives of those they come in contact with, so I have decided to make a conscious effort to not be a catalyst for generating negativity. There is enough negativity and injustices in this world as is; I don't want to add to it. 

Although I still have SA which poses its challenges, I know that many positive things have come out of it, and that there's just no point in dwelling on only the negative aspects of it. I know that somewhere down the line in my life I will look back at this condition and in retrospect and discover the purpose of it furthermore. It's pretty ironic, but back in the day when seemingly I had everything (good health, opportunities, etc..) I felt the most hollow because I have not yet learned the value of all those things, and just felt entitlement to them instead of looking at them as a blessings and being appreciative. Also, the person I was back then I would want nothing to do with now. I was akways seeking approval in others, waiting for somebody to remind me of my worth, which led to a cycle of abusive relationships which left me even more hollow than I started out, and insecure, heartbroken, emotionally and physically drained, and depressed. Also, I was arrogant, spoiled, judgmental, finicky, immature and spiritually bankrupt. Looking back on the old me, I can honestly say that, despite of my sa, I feel more complete, more fulfilled and content than I ever have felt in my life. 

I look at this condition metaphorically - I perceive it to be like a scar ointment that hurts the skin upon application - although my SA brought me a lot of pain, at the same time it has resulted in removal of a lot of negativity within myself, and only after I've experienced the pain, did I realize that one day, once the healing process takes place and I find treatment for my condition, I will come out of this whole experience a better person. I really believe that all the trials and hardships I went through have strengthened and improved me as a person, and I don't think I would have been able to get this outcome if I hadn't experienced SA. So, that's how I feel about my SA - I look at it as a positive experience: as a learning experience which has molded and shaped me into the person I am today, a person I feel much better about than the person I was prior to SA. I would like to hear about some of your positive experiences with SA as well.


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## sslhea (Sep 30, 2005)

*re: What are some positive aspects that resulted from your S*

Transcend! That was a really insightful message you wrote. I could tell that there is deep healing within yourself. I felt your serenity! You are definitely further along in being less crippled by SA. 
You are the kind of person that I would like to attract more of in my life!
I am so happy for you!


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## sslhea (Sep 30, 2005)

*Re: What are some positive aspects that resulted from your S*



Transcend said:


> because I've learned that the way people treat and regard others reflects the way they feel about themselves. I have learned to control my temper and choose my words wisely, even though that can be hard to do at times when the other person is being arrogant or rude. I now know that whatever negative message I direct at someone could potentially hurt them, cause their self-esteem to decrease, and sometimes cause a ripple effect which will create a lot of negativity in their life and in the lives of those they come in contact with, so I have decided to make a conscious effort to not be a *catalyst for generating negativity.* There is enough negativity and injustices in this world as is; I don't want to add to it.


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## Grantonio (Jan 20, 2006)

I am definitely more sensitive (more in touch with my feelings), a better listener, less judgemental, and I grew to always work hard at things to do them right (perfectionism from SA). That and having the desire to acquire inner peace, which I have been working on as of late...since I have done a lot to manage my SA, i figure the next step is finding my "inner being" (haha, that sounds weird) and really getting in touch with the present moment. yay!


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## Nuthatch (Apr 13, 2007)

*re: What are some positive aspects that resulted from your S*

Thank you for such an uplifting post Transcend. :kiss It was beautiful.

I don't feel sad for the people with SA who recognize their difficulty and take steps toward overcoming it. Their journey may be filled with misery and pain, therapy may take years, and changing themselves will probably be one of the hardest things they will ever do, but they have such a wonderful opportunity for growth! There are no limits to how far one can go when one is self-aware. There is so much hope for these people. And I'm speaking from personal experience because I've also been down that road.

But I do feel sad for the people who remain in denial or haven't the faintest insight into why they do what they do. And I'm not just talking about people who have SA. I think this applies even to the average person. Those people who live their lives day-after-day, who have all the regular problems, sorrows, and frustrations (maybe nothing so painful as SA, but still not easy), but still without any idea why they act, feel, or think the way they do. Or why others do either, for that matter. And so they never learn how to deal with life any better or move much farther in terms of personal growth and fulfillment. With self-awareness comes the capacity for growth and change, but without it, you're in the dark and aren't likely to get what you want or need out of life.

SA drove me toward self-awareness and change. I now recognize how valuable self-awareness is and how it has enriched my life, to the point where I would never trade my life-with all the stress, pain, and difficulty involved-with a happy, breezy life where I do not know or care to know myself. How empty, how aimless life would be otherwise!


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

*re: What are some positive aspects that resulted from your S*

Great post. I'll try to incorporate this new mindset into my day-to-day thinking.


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## RWolfe506 (Apr 20, 2007)

*re: What are some positive aspects that resulted from your S*

I think not being part of the crowd has given me a unique perspective on things... people much older than me often tell me they're impressed because they think I've learned a lot of the things that take people most of their lives to figure out.


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