# Shaking in conversation



## Odinn (Dec 15, 2012)

I have noticed -and my family has pointed out many times- that during conversations that I am particularly passionate about or am consciously involved in I start shaking.
It's not because I am cold or scared, but I shiver like it would be cold.
As I am trying to get a point across, I seem to shiver more-so.

Any idea what this could be?
Does it happen to anyone else?


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

I notice that when I have an incredibly negative interaction with someone online (which in my case can include debates, since I don't deal well with disagreement), I'll start physically shaking. I can feel the weakness and tension in my muscles; it's a literal physical fear response.

I don't get this way with other types of interactions, probably because it only happens when I'm incredibly upset or feeling defensive, though perhaps you experience the same type of reaction whether it's a negative interaction or just something you're passionate about. In my case I wonder if it's some type of fight-or-flight response; maybe it's similar with you?







I'm not sure though, since you say you don't experience fear with yours. An unconscious reaction maybe? :/


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

I don't shake when I'm talking to people. But I do shake when I'm REALLY nervous and dreading something lol.


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## enfield (Sep 4, 2010)

i get shaky sometimes. when i'm talking it's mostly my mouth (jaw?) i have trouble with. it can even happen around people i'm comfortable with (my family and closest friend). like if they accuse me of something bad, or say something untrue about me, basically if i feel threatened. then it makes it harder to talk. and my legs will shake occasionally just from being near people (like on the bus or in the library). i feel self-conscious when i have to make the motions to stop it, like by rearranging them. that always feels so forced. but i would rather try that than have it become noticed.


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## AlwaysImagining (May 25, 2012)

Me too. Even worse cause it gets hard to swallow and I turn red >_< This used to only happen in school (worst days of my life) but it started happening within family too and that's how I eventually realized I had SA. Most of it occurred when my family would mention something that brought out my insecurities regarding me being gay. I only came out to them altogether last year, so for the longest time I suffered in silence and anxiety over any little thing that might trigger a thought of them wondering about my sexuality. And even though I'm out to them now, I still get nervous to talk about it >__< So if I _must _speak up to anything they might say wrong/offensive about it, I do get very shaky and all that, and tend to sound angry cause I'd be in such a nerve-wrecked state. It sucks cause I wish I could just get my point across with nothing but confidence and an understandable tone.

Other than that subject, I also get like that anytime my oldest sister and I end up arguing. You see, we aren't speaking to each other, and sadly this has been going on for months. The only time we do "speak" to each other, it'll just be a random outburst/argument and _every time _I get anxious and shaky. I absolutely hate having to argue with *anybody*, but especially my own family. In fact, we don't even have to argue anymore, just her walking into the kitchen while I'm there is enough for me to get anxious/shaky/angry and I usually try my best to hurry up with whatever I'm doing just to go back to my room and not see her. Yeah, it's really bad how we're like enemies now. I'd tell you all the reasons why we're not speaking to each other, but that would take ages.

I just want to let you know that there are a lot of times I get shaky too, especially when discussing things I'm passionate about. Thankfully my fam does not point it out, that would just make me more self conscious (as if it didn't make me already). But yeah, when you say things you're passionate about, is it like things they wouldn't approve of?


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## Odinn (Dec 15, 2012)

tehuti88 said:


> I notice that when I have an incredibly negative interaction with someone online (which in my case can include debates, since I don't deal well with disagreement), I'll start physically shaking. I can feel the weakness and tension in my muscles; it's a literal physical fear response.
> 
> I don't get this way with other types of interactions, probably because it only happens when I'm incredibly upset or feeling defensive, though perhaps you experience the same type of reaction whether it's a negative interaction or just something you're passionate about. In my case I wonder if it's some type of fight-or-flight response; maybe it's similar with you?
> 
> ...


Maybe so, but I am aware of when it happens but I can't stop it, it's very strange, it's never with fear but it is always in a conversation I have strong opinions on like religion, criminality, drugs, or the paranormal.



AlwaysImagining said:


> Me too. Even worse cause it gets hard to swallow and I turn red >_< This used to only happen in school (worst days of my life) but it started happening within family too and that's how I eventually realized I had SA. Most of it occurred when my family would mention something that brought out my insecurities regarding me being gay. I only came out to them altogether last year, so for the longest time I suffered in silence and anxiety over any little thing that might trigger a thought of them wondering about my sexuality. And even though I'm out to them now, I still get nervous to talk about it >__< So if I _must _speak up to anything they might say wrong/offensive about it, I do get very shaky and all that, and tend to sound angry cause I'd be in such a nerve-wrecked state. It sucks cause I wish I could just get my point across with nothing but confidence and an understandable tone.
> 
> Other than that subject, I also get like that anytime my oldest sister and I end up arguing. You see, we aren't speaking to each other, and sadly this has been going on for months. The only time we do "speak" to each other, it'll just be a random outburst/argument and _every time _I get anxious and shaky. I absolutely hate having to argue with *anybody*, but especially my own family. In fact, we don't even have to argue anymore, just her walking into the kitchen while I'm there is enough for me to get anxious/shaky/angry and I usually try my best to hurry up with whatever I'm doing just to go back to my room and not see her. Yeah, it's really bad how we're like enemies now. I'd tell you all the reasons why we're not speaking to each other, but that would take ages.
> 
> I just want to let you know that there are a lot of times I get shaky too, especially when discussing things I'm passionate about. Thankfully my fam does not point it out, that would just make me more self conscious (as if it didn't make me already). But yeah, when you say things you're passionate about, is it like things they wouldn't approve of?


I'm sorry to hear you and your sister aren't on good terms.
What I mean by passionate is things I believe strongly or have formed opinions of that are important to me, like games, paranormal, (any of the characters or stories I hae made) or my opinions on morality and the like.



mezzoforte said:


> I don't shake when I'm talking to people. But I do shake when I'm REALLY nervous and dreading something lol.


Me too, I shake in situations like that, which is why I refer to this particular problem as a shiver, 'cause it is more like a shiver from cold than a shake from fear, you know?



enfield said:


> i get shaky sometimes. when i'm talking it's mostly my mouth (jaw?) i have trouble with. it can even happen around people i'm comfortable with (my family and closest friend). like if they accuse me of something bad, or say something untrue about me, basically if i feel threatened. then it makes it harder to talk. and my legs will shake occasionally just from being near people (like on the bus or in the library). i feel self-conscious when i have to make the motions to stop it, like by rearranging them. that always feels so forced. but i would rather try that than have it become noticed.


Yes, my jaw clammers sometimes but I feel my shakes mostly in my shoulders and body.

Thank you everyone for responding!


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## TrulyBlessed (Apr 6, 2013)

Hello Odinn,

Yes! This often happens to me. It has improved some but at times it is crippling. I feel like everyone notices it as well but apparently not so much. This is one of the issues I want to understand better (as to what causes it) and work on. I wish you the best.

- Liz


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## ANXPhoenix (Mar 17, 2013)

Yeah I tend to get very involved and animated when I comes to certain things. Whether it's having to call someone, dealing with an emergency at work, hopeful jubilance over a successful interaction with others,or a the chance to share or discuss a passion.

Its probably a mix of fear, desperation, and.... rarity? It's so rare that someone with social anxiety really feels comfortable putting themselves, or having a chance to prove themselves, or share interests so it's like invigorating, refreshing, and new in a sense to finally have a chance to do it.


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## Odinn (Dec 15, 2012)

TrulyBlessed said:


> Hello Odinn,
> 
> Yes! This often happens to me. It has improved some but at times it is crippling. I feel like everyone notices it as well but apparently not so much. This is one of the issues I want to understand better (as to what causes it) and work on. I wish you the best.
> 
> - Liz


Thank you, I have noticed this happens more with family and friends, when I am socialising with a stranger (which is rare) it never happens.
Maybe one day I will figure it out, or maybe it will just go away, who knows?
But thank you kindly for your support!



ANXPhoenix said:


> Yeah I tend to get very involved and animated when I comes to certain things. Whether it's having to call someone, dealing with an emergency at work, hopeful jubilance over a successful interaction with others,or a the chance to share or discuss a passion.
> 
> Its probably a mix of fear, desperation, and.... rarity? It's so rare that someone with social anxiety really feels comfortable putting themselves, or having a chance to prove themselves, or share interests so it's like invigorating, refreshing, and new in a sense to finally have a chance to do it.


Yes, the shaking I experience during intriguing conversation and the shaking in situations my anxiety act up are two entirely different feelings though.
And it only happens when with family or friends since I don't have long, opinionated conversations with strangers, haha.


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## maddiemouse1234 (14 d ago)

I have the exact same problem!! When i get super excited and passionate about a conversation, especially a past experience or trauma, I start to shiver really bad. I think it might just be adrenaline because my mind goes a mile a minute thinking about all the things I can say about the topic yk? Like everything starts pouring out of my mouth fast asf and I just start shaking like a chihuahua. Sometimes I just gotta chill for a sec and take deep breaths but in like 10 mins im back to shaking. It really only happens when I’m DEEP in conversation and with either family or friends too! I’m kinda glad someone else does this and not just me lol.


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## Starcut83 (Feb 13, 2021)

It's adrenaline.


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