# I want to attend a Work Christmas Party



## ladybuginthecorner (Jan 11, 2015)

There is an employee party for a restaurant I work at. I want to go but I am getting a train load of thoughts mostly on how awkward it is going to feel. I don't want to skip cause I have not been to a party that involved friends or work colleagues since high school. Please someone give advice!

P.S One of the restaruant owners is scary enough when I am working ( it feels like having a gun to my back) She is likely to be there and its going to feel even more weird like she is the likely person to judge me. ar


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## Richard1984 (May 5, 2014)

I would try and go, try not to think negatively. 

I went to a xmas meal from a voluntary job I did and wasn't looking forward to it but it wasn't that bad. I was feeling nervous at first and awkward but it gradually went away. 

I would just smile and listen to what people are saying which is hard when there's loud music playing.


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## Hayman (Dec 27, 2014)

I've been to several parties where I work in the four and a half years I've been there. I can quite honestly say that I've felt like a complete spare part at every single one of them. I'm not a socialiser and I don't particularly going out unless it's with family. I've gone to try and simply get myself out of this 'shell' but I just end up being reminded on why I try and avoid such occasions in the first place. I'm not comfortable in other people's company. I never have been.

Only the other day, the office manager said to me "_you have to put the effort in_" with regards to not wanting a 30th birthday party as I have no friends. Umm...sorry? I have put the effort in. Why does he think I've been doing when forcing myself to attend previous get-togethers? The effort is there by the bucket-load. No one is interested in me. No one knows I'm there, as people simply look 'through' me when I try and join in a conversation (as if I'm a child). It's as simple as that. I talk, I'm either ignored or talked over. If they do listen, I'm argued with. It's never a discussion on mutual terms. Never. I just can't win whatever I do.

Unless I drape myself in neon lights and set myself on fire, I don't really know what else I can do to draw people's attention. I've already long given up hope of anyone willing to talk to me on level/mutual terms without me being the butt of yet another joke or insult.

Unfortunately, I've got to the stage where I've now thrown in the towel and given up. I want nothing to do with parties outside of family any more. It started when I didn't attend our last Christmas party at work. The office staff didn't bother asking me this time around and the warehouse personnel left me alone after I declined an 'informal' invite. I was actually quite relieved. I'm really hoping it'll be the same this Christmas if I'm still working there...


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## wmu'14 (Sep 17, 2010)

OP, if you drink, try taking a shot or 2 to lighten you up and if there's drinks served at the party, don't be afraid to have some. Try sitting (not sure of the 'format' of the party) by someone you're pretty familiar with. Either way, these are never as bad as you think they're going to be.

That being said, as @Hayman said, I do end up always feeling totally worthless, a spare part, awkward, embarrassed, wondering if the others would even have a greater time without me there, and reminded why I should have just stayed home.

Tomorrow the department is going to Happy Hour. They've gone 3 times since November. I've gone all 3 of those other times. The first was absolutely horrible but the second 2 were kind of fun. I REALLY don't want to go tomorrow and am thinking of clever ways to say no. (ie, 'you can have my 5 drinks.')



Hayman said:


> The office staff didn't bother asking me this time around and the warehouse personnel left me alone after I declined an 'informal' invite. I was actually quite relieved. I'm really hoping it'll be the same this Christmas if I'm still working there...


I don't even see how you can maintain employment being, [I don't mean this negatively. I know what it's like and that you're trying REALLY hard] a Scrooge. The place I worked at this summer fired me for not being as exciting/outgoing. The current place I'm at would completely ostrichize me, more so then what they already do, if I stopped participating.

Your post reminds me so much of me though lol. What do you do at work?


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