# Can't keep a stable job!



## vexdan (Aug 8, 2012)

i find it challenging holding down a job. the longest job i've had was 7 months and i've had 25+ jobs since i was 15. i'm legitimately not proud of it. i'm offered a job and i quit within a month, sometimes even within 3 days. on the other hand, i am disrespecting the company for leaving on such short notice, which i am shameful for. the moment i require facing customers face to face or through the phone, my anxiety overrides me. so, i quit. strangely, i don't mind interviews, because i get a chance to wear this regally confident, outspoken, outgoing character of the person i want to be... but the mask falls off when it's work time. fake it till you make it? but clearly consistency isn't my best trait lol. 

i'm posting here today because feel so frustrated, alone, and unaccomplished. overall, a failure. i'm drowning in debt, my gym membership is frozen, my cell phone is about to get cut off, all because i can't stabilize a damn job. with all due respect, i was wondering if anyone would kindly answer these questions. 

1.) what are the worst jobs you could never do? 

2.) what are certain things that trigger your anxiety at work?

like i stated above, i'm feeling alone. sometimes it's relieving to hear that others are dealing with the similar problem.

thanks in advance!


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## Wanderlust89 (Apr 4, 2014)

Damn, wish I was lucky to be offered that many jobs. After I had quit my first job, no one gave me a chance so I was unemployed for 2 years!

Anyway, I also wish I could give you positive advice but the only thing that's working for me is to go mentally numb when dealing with the same **** everyday. I'm also in a situation where quitting is not an option or else I'll be homeless, so maybe if you live on your own you'd be more disciplined to keep a job.

So to answer your questions...

1.) what are the worst jobs you could never do? 
I wouldn't want to do any job that involves high interaction with customers. 

2.) what are certain things that trigger your anxiety at work?
Working with a strict assistant manager who's a jerk because he can be. I can't stand mind games especially having to put on a nice face for them. Also, anytime I'm learning something new. I always feel the pressure to show I'm a quick learner, but when my anxiety skyrockets that backfires.


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## BlueChildEmma (Jan 13, 2016)

Yeah when I did have a job I had to quit but that was due to me not getting paid.


I had an interview recently at a gocery store those *** holes didn't even call me back


FIRST OFF!

They forgot I was even coming the guy had this attitude like I was wasting his damn time.

I was kind of like wtf, I was trying to polite and nice he lost my application he had to call the woman who i was orignally suppose to be interviewing with and she told him that I was coming in OVER THE PHONE!


I'm like well i'm glad you take such pride in hiring people..

I think he didn't hire me because of the way I look (but I would never tell anyone that.)

So she didn't tell anyone I was coming in..
She apparently left...not saying a damn word..


Then today I get an email saying "The position you want has been given to someone else." Or some **** like that.


I'm pissed off because he didn't even interview me for that position he didn't even know what I was there for!!!!!!!

He said
"So what do you want to do?"
Want to be a cashier or something?"

Swear to god that's what he said to me.

Sorry I know this is unrelated I have a lot of anger issues lately..

Um a job that I could never do (again.)

Is probably fast food...I think that was the tipping point for me, I've been even more angry after that.

I got yelled by this dude because I wasn't looking where he wanted and he snatched the cup I was giving him right out my hands cursing

So yeah..I hate people.


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## AdorableAdipose (Jan 17, 2016)

Being a nutrition assistant sucks because you have to be in people's face and follow strict guidelines. I absolutely hate telling old people that the food is too hard or too much sodium; going to each room and having to put on my happy go lucky smile and charm the **** out of these patients gives me serious anxiety. The nurses and NAs are even worst because they are always watching and talking **** with their clan. Apparently I did the job well because after putting in my notice they called me to HR to ask if I can work per diem. I will every other weekend but even that may be too much. I just don't want to see or deal with my coworkers and the patients...

If stocking groceries paid well that would be my ideal job, little to no customer service, creativity/ self-governing, and it is physical enough where i can skip the gym i hardly ever go to....anyways, I think working from home is ideal for anyone with SA.


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## vexdan (Aug 8, 2012)

Wanderlust89 said:


> Damn, wish I was lucky to be offered that many jobs. After I had quit my first job, no one gave me a chance so I was unemployed for 2 years!
> 
> Anyway, I also wish I could give you positive advice but the only thing that's working for me is to go mentally numb when dealing with the same **** everyday. I'm also in a situation where quitting is not an option or else I'll be homeless, so maybe if you live on your own you'd be more disciplined to keep a job.
> 
> ...


i couldn't agree with you more. once you are on living on your own, you can only depend on your own income. i salute you for your independence even if it means numbing your entire being. i admire that! thank you for the practical advice.

ps. i feel you on being pressured when it's show time, presenting your quick knowledge, let alone someone watching you as you work! i become irritated and antsy.


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## vexdan (Aug 8, 2012)

BlueChildEmma said:


> Yeah when I did have a job I had to quit but that was due to me not getting paid.
> 
> I had an interview recently at a gocery store those *** holes didn't even call me back
> 
> ...


wow. i'm appalled. unprofessional at its finest. i'm so sorry to hear this mess up! i can already level up to your anger issues just by reading this. i definitely understand you. i could imagine how awkward it was standing there being mistreated for something that is clearly not your fault. it amazes me how many people resort to a sour attitude when dealing with others. man, screw them. you're more than that grocery store, i encourage you to keep searching and sending out your resume. don't let this one stupid incident stop you, nothing was your fault. good luck!

i also could not work at a cashier job aka fast food chains. here's the thing, i can count, but handling/counting money/giving change back to people generates my anxiety.


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## vexdan (Aug 8, 2012)

AdorableAdipose said:


> Being a nutrition assistant sucks because you have to be in people's face and follow strict guidelines. I absolutely hate telling old people that the food is too hard or too much sodium; going to each room and having to put on my happy go lucky smile and charm the **** out of these patients gives me serious anxiety. The nurses and NAs are even worst because they are always watching and talking **** with their clan. Apparently I did the job well because after putting in my notice they called me to HR to ask if I can work per diem. I will every other weekend but even that may be too much. I just don't want to see or deal with my coworkers and the patients...
> 
> If stocking groceries paid well that would be my ideal job, little to no customer service, creativity/ self-governing, and it is physical enough where i can skip the gym i hardly ever go to....anyways, I think working from home is ideal for anyone with SA.


I have no objections. I'm the same way when i'm being watched working. outside i'm calm, but inside my blood in boiling to it's highest temperature. but seriously, i'm encouraged by your determination to complete your work not only thoroughly, but also successfully. you dread the job, yet you deliver good work ethics! goes to show you're capable of anything you set your mind to. also, at the end of the day, know that you made a difference in people's lives in terms of their health for it is vital. you could have went against the regulations and performed lazy/carefree, but instead you were there to improve the health of others. i sincerely respect that!


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## AdorableAdipose (Jan 17, 2016)

vexdan said:


> I have no objections. I'm the same way when i'm being watched working. outside i'm calm, but inside my blood in boiling to it's highest temperature. but seriously, i'm encouraged by your determination to complete your work not only thoroughly, but also successfully. you dread the job, yet you deliver good work ethics! goes to show you're capable of anything you set your mind to. also, at the end of the day, know that you made a difference in people's lives in terms of their health for it is vital. you could have went against the regulations and performed lazy/carefree, but instead you were there to improve the health of others. i sincerely respect that!


I appreciate the feedback, that was some of the kindest words of support and encouragement. I wish you luck in the future, and update us on your progress!


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## TruthAndOtherDisasters (Dec 17, 2013)

vexdan said:


> i find it challenging holding down a job. the longest job i've had was 7 months and i've had 25+ jobs since i was 15. i'm legitimately not proud of it. i'm offered a job and i quit within a month, sometimes even within 3 days. on the other hand, i am disrespecting the company for leaving on such short notice, which i am shameful for. the moment i require facing customers face to face or through the phone, my anxiety overrides me. so, i quit. strangely, i don't mind interviews, because i get a chance to wear this regally confident, outspoken, outgoing character of the person i want to be... but the mask falls off when it's work time. fake it till you make it? but clearly consistency isn't my best trait lol.
> 
> i'm posting here today because feel so frustrated, alone, and unaccomplished. overall, a failure. i'm drowning in debt, my gym membership is frozen, my cell phone is about to get cut off, all because i can't stabilize a damn job. with all due respect, i was wondering if anyone would kindly answer these questions.
> 
> ...


That exact struggle is why I chose to work for myself. I feel that when you have anxiety problems that are making working harder(when it's not easy to begin with), you have to make a radical choice. You can a. find a job that is less-anxiety for you(least amount of contact with people possible) or work for yourself OR b. do some sort of treatment/counselling for the anxiety to reduce it. Cause living like that is bad. So I started working for myself, which is it's own challenge- when I end up working less because of stress and then have money issues and barely make ends meet while people around me get decent salaries...but I still like working like this better.
If you are drowning in debt I would suggest really have some online work on the side to add to your income while you are figuring your work situation, as insurance in a way. It will at least take some pressure off.
Answers to your questions:

1. Jobs I could never do...
Waitress, call center...I can brace myself for dealing with people at times, but having to do so constantly with a whole stream of people, on call or in person, is too too much.

2. Things that trigger my anxiety.
- getting yelled at.
-being uncomfortable with things I don't have much control of
-feeling I'm doing a bad job, or hating the people at a job but knowing there is no future where that job will change much.
I had a time when I couldn't handle doing a call center job, even though that meant few more months of job search and barely getting by. 
I had a job that I did for 6 months where I HATED every single day. It was manual labor in something like a warehouse, it was a job I did because I needed the money fast and it was decent and dependable pay(at a time when that was a rare thing). I hated it not because it was manual labor with no prospects(and really tiring) but because of the people. There were 2 rooms where 2 sets of people worked and I had some interraction with all. A lot of them were fine with having that job and had the perception that such job is all there is to life, and wanting more is just stupid and naive, and that was really, really having a negative impact on me working towards something better. And most of them were so tired of life it was really depressing. Also some of them had no interests besides doing that job and drinking after it. There were also some people outwardly flirting in a way that was uncomfortable no matter how I tried being clear that's not what I want. Then there was some drama with a girl that didn't like that a guy she liked liked me and she tried turning people against me. Then there were the people liking to "spice up" there work day only by making dirty jokes...it was that kind of work, like, making dirty jokes was their thing, and if it's not your thing you feel awkward. I was doing that job while taking break from uni(to have ability to pay for the rest) and it really squashed my self-esteem and dreams. It was constantly making me feel stupid, naive, awkward and irrelevant. The only thing that made me get through was knowing there was an end date to that work and then I am getting back to uni.


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## Enyalius (Jul 10, 2013)

1) I don't think there are any jobs I wouldn't do.

2) Having responsibility for others work.

My advice would be to get a job that doesn't involve much interaction with others. Perhaps a factory job on a production line.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## vexdan (Aug 8, 2012)

TruthAndOtherDisasters said:


> That exact struggle is why I chose to work for myself. I feel that when you have anxiety problems that are making working harder(when it's not easy to begin with), you have to make a radical choice. You can a. find a job that is less-anxiety for you(least amount of contact with people possible) or work for yourself OR b. do some sort of treatment/counselling for the anxiety to reduce it. Cause living like that is bad. So I started working for myself, which is it's own challenge- when I end up working less because of stress and then have money issues and barely make ends meet while people around me get decent salaries...but I still like working like this better.
> If you are drowning in debt I would suggest really have some online work on the side to add to your income while you are figuring your work situation, as insurance in a way. It will at least take some pressure off.
> Answers to your questions:
> 
> ...


Thanks for your informative reply (i apologize for the delayed response). Agreed. I would love to work a job where it requires an own business type, but what i lack is being business minded. i don't mind working with someone, but i don't want to work FOR someone, know what i'm saying? also, that's really awesome you ventured out to self-employment and made happen. i could imagine how less stressful it is in comparison to waking up every morning, feeling dreadful heading to a job you dread (me monday-fri lol).

Lastly, I can relate to you on so many levels working with complicated personalities and drama at a working place. Feeling inadequate, out of place, awkward and being socially inpet. You're not alone. Just now that you've passed those difficulties and are worth a ton more than those hell jobs and people. That's some consistency you have, given your situation battling anxiety. I hope you're doing better these days. Never let a difficult painful experience hinder you from going further.

Take care


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## BlueDay (May 6, 2014)

I'm in a similar situation. 15 jobs and multiple firings. The last job I lost was devastating to me b/c the management was SO laid back. They gave me many chances I did not deserve, which enabled me to stay employed a record 4 years! But now I am severely depressed knowing I will not find such a company again.


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## vexdan (Aug 8, 2012)

BlueDay said:


> I'm in a similar situation. 15 jobs and multiple firings. The last job I lost was devastating to me b/c the management was SO laid back. They gave me many chances I did not deserve, which enabled me to stay employed a record 4 years! But now I am severely depressed knowing I will not find such a company again.


You were very lucky to have worked under such an understanding company. That would be awesome if every company was like that, but its not the case unfortunately. 4 years is a loooong time man hahaha my longest was 10 months. Haven't beat the record...

You will find employment again! The thing is, you'll just need to keep your options open. I'm stupidly picky with my jobs. I get your struggle. But an open mind is key.


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## TruthAndOtherDisasters (Dec 17, 2013)

vexdan said:


> Thanks for your informative reply (i apologize for the delayed response). Agreed. I would love to work a job where it requires an own business type, but what i lack is being business minded. i don't mind working with someone, but i don't want to work FOR someone, know what i'm saying? also, that's really awesome you ventured out to self-employment and made happen. i could imagine how less stressful it is in comparison to waking up every morning, feeling dreadful heading to a job you dread (me monday-fri lol).
> 
> Lastly, I can relate to you on so many levels working with complicated personalities and drama at a working place. Feeling inadequate, out of place, awkward and being socially inpet. You're not alone. Just now that you've passed those difficulties and are worth a ton more than those hell jobs and people. That's some consistency you have, given your situation battling anxiety. I hope you're doing better these days. Never let a difficult painful experience hinder you from going further.
> 
> Take care


Thanks for saying all that. I still have a lot of anxiety and I am learning to manage it daily. Just recently I hit a wall at what I think I can do by my own efforts and I think I may try to find suitable(and somehow affordable) therapy. My job is surely less stressful than going to a job you hate daily though.

I have issues- lots- like the fact that I make a lot more money when I work in a co working space(or any space out of my apartment so I don't procrastinate) BUT severely freak out on buses if they are overcrowded...Which renders me unable to work for a full day sometimes. But the great news is, even so, I make enough to get by, which is still a gift. Being able to afford that. I feel horrible when I have to do that- but I'm glad I've earned the option. Freelancing is really great. It doesn't have to be only working with people as a business though. You can have an online product you sell, and get to have the smallest interaction possible. There's a lot you can do. I do really like how many options the internet has once you are patient enough to dig deeper.


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