# Complete lack of emotion



## thesceptic (Nov 2, 2008)

I've found recently that, although I've been stepping into new social situations and being generally socially accepted at college, I have no happiness in my life. My frustratingly slow progress and constant feeling of being in a Catch 22 has depleted my ability to appreciate the good things in life. I am neither happy nor unhappy, I just exist, trundling along on a life that I can't seem to kickstart. I see amazing things and I know they should make me feel good, but that dry feeling of complete neutrality remains in my stomach. I miss the times when I felt joy, happiness and satisfaction. It is this lack of emotion that has made me unmotivational - I'm doing less work and I can't be bothered to practice the things that I'd like to get good at. I feel lazy and unappreciative of the things that I have. I go out with friends, have a laugh, but don't feel genuine happiness. I feel like a robot that behaves just like a human, but is unable to feel emotion. I look at the people who have colourful, exciting lives who have the motivation to keep improving - I wish I had those feelings and that motivation again.

I know this feeling is associated with people who take medicine for depression. I'm not taking any medicine for anything, yet I feel like this. I feel like my life is currently unfulfilled and I don't have the motivation to do anything about it. Does SA do this to anybody else? Any ideas for kickstarts?


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## skerrigan (Feb 19, 2009)

i also have the feeling of no feeling at all, i dont know what to do...try st. johns wart?


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## Hot Chocolate (Sep 29, 2008)

I always feel like this after I graduated from HS.

With medicine, it's even worse.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

I feel so emotionally depleted, drained.


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## Jinnix (Jul 6, 2006)

I dont feel anything either, I just exist with no purpose. My life is devoid of emotion. I'm scared that I'm becoming so used to this lifestyle that I will lose the motivation to change.


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## finster (Jul 5, 2007)

I feel dead inside at the moment myself, just existing day to day with little progress towards normalcy.


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## striker (Jun 20, 2008)

I use 2 oils ( basically natural herb/oil mixtures)

One is Nasal drops : Super Nasya Oil 
Other is under the Tongue : Deep Love Herbal Extract

you can get them here: http://www.ayurveda.com/products/sidha_soma.html

My alternative doc prescribed them for me for long term use in treating SA. I have been using them for the last 4 months. (mostly)
Initially I was taking Deep Love 3 times a day and the Nasya oil 2 times. I think the dosage was too much for me. Never felt so emotional in my life.

So I cut it down a bit, now I take them once a day.

But these definitely open your heart.


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## Prodigal Son (Dec 11, 2005)

I wonder if it is a defense mechanism or you're just emotionally drained and burnt out. I think I'm usually too emotional, but there is definitely moments when I'm just numb.


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## mikailum (Dec 18, 2005)

If you're feeling numb, I would recommend doing something active that changes your state of mind ... something that pushes your anxiety thresholds. Ask someone out on a date, join a public speaking club, get a job in sales or marketing. It is only by continually challenging ourselves that we can feel really alive.


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## n1kkuh (Jul 11, 2008)

I think I've discovered that my anxiety problem is really just a surface problem. Its just one emotion that I use to convey the wide array of other emotions that I fail to express. I have so much surpressed rage, frustration, and other things and it seems to be translated into anxiety. Its like, since I fail to express my other emotions, my brain forces myself to express anxiety because that's all it feels safe expressing.


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## J_111 (Jan 23, 2009)

i feel so empty and i never have anything to look foward to but i have to remain positive and hopeful its really hard. Theres so much things i want and need to achieve but this SA is making it seem impossible.


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## lookingforpower (Feb 24, 2009)

thesceptic said:


> I've found recently that, although I've been stepping into new social situations and being generally socially accepted at college, I have no happiness in my life. My frustratingly slow progress and constant feeling of being in a Catch 22 has depleted my ability to appreciate the good things in life. I am neither happy nor unhappy, I just exist, trundling along on a life that I can't seem to kickstart. I see amazing things and I know they should make me feel good, but that dry feeling of complete neutrality remains in my stomach. I miss the times when I felt joy, happiness and satisfaction. It is this lack of emotion that has made me unmotivational - I'm doing less work and I can't be bothered to practice the things that I'd like to get good at. I feel lazy and unappreciative of the things that I have. I go out with friends, have a laugh, but don't feel genuine happiness. I feel like a robot that behaves just like a human, but is unable to feel emotion. I look at the people who have colourful, exciting lives who have the motivation to keep improving - I wish I had those feelings and that motivation again.
> 
> I know this feeling is associated with people who take medicine for depression. I'm not taking any medicine for anything, yet I feel like this. I feel like my life is currently unfulfilled and I don't have the motivation to do anything about it. Does SA do this to anybody else? Any ideas for kickstarts?


Hi there,

I'm new to this forum so i'd just like to say hi.

I've experienced exactly the same things. I can't seem to feel anything anymore. I have a history of pure o OCD and anxiety issues and i feel that this anxiety has maybe caused this. I don't know if its depression, because i've been depressed before and it was different but now I feel its just an ability to feel things issue which i guess could be depression. I can't even get angry over things which used to make me angry, anger was one emotion which could make me feel things and then ultimately i could do something about whatever was making me angry.

I can't even do that now and its scary because emotions are often the kickstart we need to change ourselves but now i feel that i'm trapped in a lifeless state. I don't know what to do anymore.

Bye for now


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## HoneyyDew (Jan 15, 2009)

Prodigal Son said:


> I wonder if it is a defense mechanism or you're just emotionally drained and burnt out. I think I'm usually too emotional, but there is definitely moments when I'm just numb.


I'm usually such an emotional person, but for a while now, I'd been feeling nothingg.. It's so difficult for me to feeling any emotions and express them. I think it is a defense mechanism, so I wouldn't get hurt and stay "safe". Due to this lack of emotion, I barely even feel any SA anymore, although I know that it's there.


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## papaSmurf (Jun 16, 2008)

HoneyyDew said:


> I'm usually such an emotional person, but for a while now, I'd been feeling nothingg.. It's so difficult for me to feeling any emotions and express them. I think it is a defense mechanism, so I wouldn't get hurt and stay "safe". Due to this lack of emotion, I barely even feel any SA anymore, although I know that it's there.


Oh dear, I am in the exact same spot these days. I'm usually a very emotional and sensitive person, and I know that all of that is still lying dormant underneath this gray, flat veneer, but lately I haven't been feeling anything at all. The anxiety is definitely still there, but it's like it's been muffled by an avalanche or is being held underwater. I'm not sure that I like this blankness, though.


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## screwjack (Dec 19, 2008)

It's called depersonalization I used to get it a lot before I moved away from my parents, I would use it as a coping mechanism to escape reality and still do. It's a lot less since I started exercising and meditation regularly. 

When everything feels so bad all the time it feels better to just shut down and not feel anything.


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## Frosty14 (Jun 17, 2011)

I can relate to that to that. I haven't felt anything since 5-6 years ago. If anyone close died or something serious, I wouldn't feel anything.


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## 390 (Jul 29, 2010)

I can also relate to this. I could be skydiving or watching a beautiful sunset and still not feel a thing, except the sense of just going through the motions of life, like a puppet on a string. I don't know if this will help you or not but I found that this man's advice has been really helpful for me.


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## Anon7 (Nov 16, 2007)

thesceptic said:


> I've found recently that, although I've been stepping into new social situations and being generally socially accepted at college, I have no happiness in my life. My frustratingly slow progress and constant feeling of being in a Catch 22 has depleted my ability to appreciate the good things in life. I am neither happy nor unhappy, I just exist, trundling along on a life that I can't seem to kickstart. I see amazing things and I know they should make me feel good, but that dry feeling of complete neutrality remains in my stomach. I miss the times when I felt joy, happiness and satisfaction. It is this lack of emotion that has made me unmotivational - I'm doing less work and I can't be bothered to practice the things that I'd like to get good at. I feel lazy and unappreciative of the things that I have. I go out with friends, have a laugh, but don't feel genuine happiness. I feel like a robot that behaves just like a human, but is unable to feel emotion. I look at the people who have colourful, exciting lives who have the motivation to keep improving - I wish I had those feelings and that motivation again.
> 
> I know this feeling is associated with people who take medicine for depression. I'm not taking any medicine for anything, yet I feel like this. I feel like my life is currently unfulfilled and I don't have the motivation to do anything about it. Does SA do this to anybody else? Any ideas for kickstarts?


You seem unhappy.

It sounds like you've learned to adapt instead of growing as a person. Maybe you just need to explore more and find out what you really like in life and what you really think.


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## cybernaut (Jul 30, 2010)

thesceptic said:


> I've found recently that, although I've been stepping into new social situations and being generally socially accepted at college, I have no happiness in my life. My frustratingly slow progress and constant feeling of being in a Catch 22 has depleted my ability to appreciate the good things in life. *I am neither happy nor unhappy, I just exist, trundling along on a life that I can't seem to kickstart.* I see amazing things and I know they should make me feel good, but that dry feeling of complete neutrality remains in my stomach. I miss the times when I felt joy, happiness and satisfaction. *It is this lack of emotion that has made me unmotivational - I'm doing less work and I can't be bothered to practice the things that I'd like to get good at. I feel lazy and unappreciative of the things that I have.* I go out with friends, have a laugh, but don't feel genuine happiness. *I feel like a robot that behaves just like a human, but is unable to feel emotion*. I look at the people who have colourful, exciting lives who have the motivation to keep improving - I wish I had those feelings and that motivation again.
> 
> I know this feeling is associated with people who take medicine for depression. I'm not taking any medicine for anything, yet I feel like this. I feel like my life is currently unfulfilled and I don't have the motivation to do anything about it. Does SA do this to anybody else? Any ideas for kickstarts?


The bold describes me. I'm in the same boat as you. It is hard for me to express emotion about smallest things. Sometimes, I feel so empty or just feel indifferent about everything. It's even hard for me to express excitement for myself and for other people. Loneliness and depression are the main two emotions that have been in my life lately..I'm not on meds. either,btw. Hopefully, there's light at the end of the tunnel for everyone who feels like this.


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## lvn4wrd (Nov 19, 2011)

*LACKING emotion???*

alexithymia perhaps?


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## Aciddia (Apr 30, 2012)

*Same here.*

I have felt no emotion since I was 6 years old. I have gone through alot through out my life and I figure that it was my way of dealing with things and it just "stuck". This has really become a problem in my life recently. I go through all the motions of life that are necessary. I have children and treat them the way they should be treated. But inside I feel nothing. My external self is just mocking what I know to be appropriate. My husband used my lack of emotion as an excuse for his abuse. My boyfriend now gets frustrated with me. I tell him I love him but don't feel it. I laugh at jokes but don't find things funny. I'm just "here". From the age 3-13 I was sold by my grandfather as a child prostitute. Also "given" to my uncles to be used at pleased. I was beaten unmercifully and at times forced to fight my 3 sisters until one was left standing, and if the "job" wasn't done right my 5 uncles would beat us until we were knocked out. At the age of 6 I was poisened by my babysitter. at the age of 10 my step-father tried to drown me to keep me from telling my mother about the abuse. (She met him through my grandfather. He was a "customer"). Then spent 8 1/2 years bounced from home to home in the foster care system. I went through a string of abuses boyfriend until my husband. He had seperate lives. He was married to me but maintained relationships with 5 other woman, not at the same time. Until to get out of our marriage he set me up to get drunk and have another guy have sex with me. He took pictures of this and tried to convince me I cheated on him. I am not whinning, just curious as to how to overcome all this and get myself to a normal level. I really want to feel happiness. I want to be more than just "here".


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## BlazingLazer (Jul 16, 2011)

It could be lack of anything that stimulates pleasure, it seems. Anhedonia. I go through periods of it sometimes and I seem to be going through a phase of it right now. I also keep thinking that I could've enjoyed instances a lot more than I did, it's really distressing.

I think all this is just tied into depression. Yes, even lack of emotion. It's strange how depression can just deplete every part of your brain that functions on really 'living'.


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## Xtraneous (Oct 18, 2011)

Wow, this was the post I saw on Google that first brought me to this site. I'm back to feeling like this, unfortunately, oh well.


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## Jennifer Clayton (Nov 19, 2010)

Loneliness and depression is mainly what I feel, and from time to time, a jolt of energy and pure joy. But then it leaves all too quickly, and I'm drowning in depression and emptiness again. That seems so bipolar. I don't know what's wrong with me.

I guess it's not really lack of emotion, more of a lack of varying emotions. I feel emotion, it's just that the emotion I feel pretty much sucks.


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## BlazingLazer (Jul 16, 2011)

Jennifer Clayton said:


> Loneliness and depression is mainly what I feel, and from time to time, a jolt of energy and pure joy. *But then it leaves all too quickly*, and I'm drowning in depression and emptiness again. That seems so bipolar. I don't know what's wrong with me.
> 
> *I guess it's not really lack of emotion, more of a lack of varying emotions. I feel emotion, it's just that the emotion I feel pretty much sucks.*


Yes, this is exactly it. Bolded certain points for emphasis as well.


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## andy7 (Apr 13, 2012)

I feel very similar to you, op. Actually today during the day I was thinking what can be wrong with me, and I think one of the things is that I simply dont care about stuff. For example, I may have to study for a test, but then i procrastinate and then at the last day before the test instead of studying I just say to myself: "Who cares?, its not like its the end of the world. Just relax and forget about studying, its the same if you study or not." Its like I just survive instead of living.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

I'm like this too. There's only a few times I really feel alive. Like a few weeks ago I was driving to my doctor's appointment first thing in the morning and speed the whole way there and blew through 2 red lights without stopping. I felt my heart pounding and I was scared ****less. It's the only time I had felt awake in months.


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## ashdevil (Feb 13, 2013)

..hai!!??? everyone... i thought im the one who feels emptiness,, yet there are many people like me... ,, even though i try to manage it,, and i try to lack my emotion's,, dat's why i dont feel anything


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## ashdevil (Feb 13, 2013)

..dont hate me if i say that i really really hate human!!!! they are annoying.especially those BOYS!!! i hate them.,, they always treat me like a robot.. im tired of pretending that im not hurt,,,, they always mock me,, i dont trust anyone.. i dont have friends.,,and my family doesnt like me.. dats why i killed any emotions that i have..


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## ashdevil (Feb 13, 2013)

..im alive but i feel dead inside.. i exist with no purpose,, why do i exist in this world??


.. no one cares me.. and they hate me.. thats the biggest question in my life... y do people hate me??


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## ashdevil (Feb 13, 2013)

Aciddia said:


> I have felt no emotion since I was 6 years old. I have gone through alot through out my life and I figure that it was my way of dealing with things and it just "stuck". This has really become a problem in my life recently. I go through all the motions of life that are necessary. I have children and treat them the way they should be treated. But inside I feel nothing. My external self is just mocking what I know to be appropriate. My husband used my lack of emotion as an excuse for his abuse. My boyfriend now gets frustrated with me. I tell him I love him but don't feel it. I laugh at jokes but don't find things funny. I'm just "here". From the age 3-13 I was sold by my grandfather as a child prostitute. Also "given" to my uncles to be used at pleased. I was beaten unmercifully and at times forced to fight my 3 sisters until one was left standing, and if the "job" wasn't done right my 5 uncles would beat us until we were knocked out. At the age of 6 I was poisened by my babysitter. at the age of 10 my step-father tried to drown me to keep me from telling my mother about the abuse. (She met him through my grandfather. He was a "customer"). Then spent 8 1/2 years bounced from home to home in the foster care system. I went through a string of abuses boyfriend until my husband. He had seperate lives. He was married to me but maintained relationships with 5 other woman, not at the same time. Until to get out of our marriage he set me up to get drunk and have another guy have sex with me. He took pictures of this and tried to convince me I cheated on him. I am not whinning, just curious as to how to overcome all this and get myself to a normal level. I really want to feel happiness. I want to be more than just "here".


..we feel the same.. and it hurts..
:'(


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## Adam61 (Feb 23, 2013)

I don't feel any emotions or attachments to anything. It doesn't make me feel bad or empty, because I can no longer imagine feeling anything. I have never felt "love" nor do I care to. When my grandparents died I felt nothing. No matter how much contact I have with someone, I just don't care about them. A lot of people on the Internet say everyone has emotions, but I am as sure as possible that I don't. I can't remember having a trauma in my life, and the people around me show emotion, I just don't. Maybe it has something to do with my high IQ, I don't know. I don't really care enough about it to fix it because I find I think more logically without feelings getting in the way, but I wanted to know if there is a name for what is going on, or if it is just me.


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