# Sitting alone during lunch..?



## Bbpuff

Well for my situation, not so much as sitting.. But being alone during lunch..

I went to a new middle school for 8th grade this year. (I know I'm young) I was invited to sit with this one girl & her friends for the first 2 days of school (it was horrible) On the 3rd day I sat alone. On the 4th day, the person who was assigned to sit next to me in art got up from his seat. And in seconds a new guy sits down next to me & compliments me on my drawing. At lunch he came out of nowhere again and i asked him if i could sit with his friends. I clinged onto him and his group till about oct. 5th. Because I started dating a guy & i would always be around him and his friends. Now that we've broken up on the 20th, I went to go back to my previous group. Now all of a sudden there GONE. All of them went there seperate ways joining into a new group with new friends. I attempted to approach a former member and start talking to them again, they'll respond.. But then carry on talking to there other friends. I found myself talking to them for about 1 min.. Standing in there group for about 5 min. And feeling so uncomfortable I just leave out of nowhere. & walk around to try to find another friend.. Untill the lunch period is over. I hate being alone, well not so much being alone, but being alone infront of other people and having a fear of being judged for it. Today I tried killing time & go to the hallway bathroom for 7 min. Then go to the cafeteria's bathroom for 3 min. Walking around for 5 min. Then go to the (suprisingly very crowded library) And pretend to be looking for a book for 15 min. Those 30 minutes feels like an eternity. I feel like I'ma end up doing this for the rest of the school year.. What did you do at lunch? Any tips on how to kill time..? (I can't listen to music and I never eat lunch) And most people leave to go outside to talk in there groups after there done eating, so usually the lunch room is empty by the time lunch is almost over.


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## 00100101

Super Marshy said:


> I hate being alone, well not so much being alone, but being alone infront of other people and having a fear of being judged for it. Today I tried killing time & go to the hallway bathroom for 7 min. Then go to the cafeteria's bathroom for 3 min. Walking around for 5 min. Then go to the (suprisingly very crowded library) And pretend to be looking for a book for 15 min. Those 30 minutes feels like an eternity. I feel like I'ma end up doing this for the rest of the school year.. What did you do at lunch? Any tips on how to kill time..? (I can't listen to music and I never eat lunch) And most people leave to go outside to talk in there groups after there done eating, so usually the lunch room is empty by the time lunch is almost over.


Everything you said in the second half of your post, i can relate with. :/
Im in year 13 (going university next year), since i picked 4 subjects to do instead of the normal 3, my workloads alot heavier. Every breaktime & lunchtime i try to get into the computer room to do work (more or less an excuse to be alone 'on purpose' because im doing work). since the amount of work i have to do is alot more, i dont think about being alone infront of people as much as i did before because im concentrating on my work

if the computer room was full or i wasnt allowed to get in, id just got to the library & 'work' there until lunch or break time was over.


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## Takerofsouls

If i dont have any friends around i usually find a place with not many people, read a book or play my guitar. Just find somewhere kinda secluded and just listen to music or do whatever you enjoy while you wait for lunch to be over. Thats always worked for me.


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## nycdude

i was the same in High School, during my freshman year 6 years ago it was time for Lunch and i was so nervous waiting in line to get my lunch and i kept thinking, " where am i going to sit and with who" i talked to few kids and became friends with some but after all those years in high school i avoided going to lunch until i found out about my school library then i started going there. before that i always went to the bathroom and stayed there for 20 minutes and after that walked around school hallways. Going to that crowded lunch room was pretty scary, not scary but nervous being around a bunch of people i did not know.


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## Shooterrr

I can relate to you a bit in this situation, except it happened in high school. I would usually sit at an empty table or where most people wouldn't gather around and eat my lunch really quickly and take out some books to pretend like I was catching up on homework or studying. The other times when I really got tired of pretending to read, I tried to spend the longest time possible walking from my class to the bathroom, stayed there for a while, then went to the cafeteria and ate reaaally slow. About a month or so in, I finally met a couple kids who were quiet like me and developed a friendship with them. I don't really have much advice to give you, but maybe you should keep sitting with that former member and their friends and eventually they'll talk to you and be your friends too? I really don't know, I'm sorry.


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## InadvertentLoveCrisis

Like the common story of every average loner on these forums, I, too, sat alone during lunch. People would sometimes come to my table to talk to me, but most of the time I was just sitting there--eating my lunch and doing "work." At first, I just did stuff like "work" during lunch to kill time and made it seem like I wasn't bothered with being alone, although, at first, I was. However, I eventually didn't feel the need to be in a group--or actually be with anybody. Thinking it was normal to be alone, like how I was, made me feel less tense. I would naturally attract people to my loner table, probably because I didn't look like a scared puppy anymore; some were even interested in what I was doing--surprised, it was just homework.

In my last three years of high school, I found out that people make most of their friends in the classroom--generally, you can make friends anywhere. You're forced to sit with some of the same classmates for hours, so why not interact with them. Most people would be willing to engage in conversation, since they're terribly bored from sitting through lecture.

Though, my best advice, while you're making friends and such, is to be yourself. Don't feel the need to cling on to one person; it's unnecessary. Choose various people to talk to--that's where you will make most of your friends. They may or may not be the first to engage conversation with you, but you should always be willing to risk talking to them first. Here's a website to help you with that: http://www.wikihow.com/Have-a-Great-Conversation

Oh yeah. You wanted an idea of what other people did during lunch, right? I used to carry around a sketchbook, and, if I wasn't catching up on homework or anything during lunch, I would draw on it. Random people would come up to me and comment; I managed to befriend some of them, if interesting conversation developed. But overall, just act natural. Don't get too tense about "being alone." It's overrated to hang out with other people like a flock of sheep anyway! Try to be unique, but don't try too hard.


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## Daktoria

Iuno if I'd agree with kids making friends within the classroom that much. It always seemed to me that extracurriculars were the clincher. Granted that class was a chance to get acquainted, but it was the opportunities to meet up outside of where everyone had to be that made the difference. Parties, games, movies, concerts, even church and band camp, lol.


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## The Daydreamer

I as well have a big fear of being alone in a crowded room. Personally, I don't mind being alone but I get so stressed that everyone else in the room is judging me and calling me a loner. Usually I just zone out (although I recently discovered that I may be getting a depersonalization disorder) or I try to look busy. Maybe try reading a book in the library? That's what I usually do.


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## Antis

I just try to get work done during lunch in the library, so I use it to my advantage in that prespect, otherwise I wouldn't get any homework done at all and go overload come exam time. Sometimes read a book, I sometimes leave college premises to go shopping or eat in town. 
You can go on computers aswel if you have them in your library, I often go on the computers and just do whatever, time tends to pass quickly on the computer.


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## GunnyHighway

I take a walk down to a park every lunch and sit alone on a bench. 10 minutes to get there, 10 minutes back. 20 minutes in between to sit there and pretend like I'm doing something on my phone. If I didn't have music to listen to, I probably would have gone insane by now.


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## luicy

_*i try to kill time too but than i was close to fainting from hunger. i stil am trying to figure out what to do about this situation(im a freshmen in high school). i find myself thinking about what i am going to do the next school day during lunch, i try bringing my own lunch but i get lazy and do something quick that usually taste discusting.i dont know wat to do anymore. i wish i could drive and go someplace where im not being judged for siting alone. i was thinking of going to sit with another "loner" but then she sat with a friend she probably knew before. i've never felt so alone!*_


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## Juju101

i sat ate an did everything alone lol to scared to talk to anyone lol


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## Ricebunnyx3

In 9th grade I sat with a group of people at lunch. I was a bit more talkative then. But in 10th grade I got more secluded and my anxiety got worse and I lost a lot a friends but not all but I sat at lunch alone cause my friends were in separate groups and it was awkward like how you described how your friends went separate ways and I would end up talking with the group for like a min. and then just leave cause they barely noticed my presence. In 11th grade I was too afraid to even enter the cafe and dreaded looking like a loser/loner so I began to just stay in the bathroom for long periods of times, go in the library, sneak out of school, wonder the halls, or sit in the stairwells. Now I'm a senior and at the beginning of the year I became friends with this girl who I sat lunch with for about a week but then I stopped because I felt uncomfortable with her other friends and I felt like they were judging me. So now I just stop by the bathroom for like 2-8 minutes then go to the library. Which I'm still very embarrassed by. Especially when this guy sees me there alone all the time (and he's not alone he's always with friends) and I kind of have a history with him... we never dated but...yeah.


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## Popularity

You should walk up to a random group of people and say, Hey I have no friends, can I sit here?

I have been in the exact situation although I avoided it once I got a car.


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## Ricebunnyx3

Popularity said:


> You should walk up to a random group of people and say, Hey I have no friends, can I sit here?
> 
> I have been in the exact situation although I avoided it once I got a car.


or hey I'm new to this school and have no friends here

it's easier to admit that since you're new. Now if you've been going there for four years they would look at you really strange.

And you're lucky, I'm not getting my car til my birthday which is in May and I'll be 18 so I'll be able to leave whenever but it sucks because I'm already a senior and I get out of school in May so my freedom will only last for about a week.


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## Bbpuff

I actually did managed finding a new friend on the bus, and she was really nice and just hanged out with only one other girl most of the time during lunch. I later befriended the other girl, and I actually liked lunch for a couple months or so.. It would be just the 3 of us, we never even went in the crowded lunch room, we just hanged out in a little corner at the library..But then my schedule got changed, and I was afraid I'd become alone again. But I found out I had a few acquantances in this new lunch, and I'll usually sit with them. After 10 minutes or so, they start to leave the table to go out in the quad. So I feel like I follow them >_< Atleast I'm not alone the whole entire lunch. ^-^ But I did prefer my old lunch, where I was more comfortable with my friends.. This new lunch group isn't really stable, because they all seperate after there done eating.. :/


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