# My teacher scares the bajeezers out of me.



## YoukosoHitoriBocchi (Sep 22, 2012)

I'm in 11th grade, and to be honest, I've had it pretty easy when it comes to school-anxiety related issues, because I've been doing independent study for most of my life. (Sadly, that also contributed to my extreme lack of socialization skills)

Basically, what I do is see a teacher once every week that gives me assignments to take home and complete. That teacher herself is a pretty friendly, soft-spoken woman. she doesn't scare me so much.
But as a requirement I'm having to take a real math class once a week as well. I've gone one time so far, and it was pretty horrible. The students are loud, obnoxious, and disobedient. which is very distracting (I also have ADD) and irritating. But I suppose that's not the biggest issue, my teacher comes off as extremely tyrannical. Everything about her scares me. And I have a feeling she's one of those people that completely disregards and belittles mental health issues as "all in your head." She just said and did so many things that irked the hell out of me, including being disrespectful to a girl with Aspergers.







I'm scared to even tell this woman about my SA in fear that she'll respond with "that's just an excuse to be lazy" or something.

and I HATE it when people say it's just an excuse! For god's sake, I've been in tears so many times because of this. I've had so many fun experiences that I've always wanted to do completely RUINED because of it. It's not something I can just turn off! why can't people understand that?







Anyway, she thought it would be fun to start calling names by random to do some math problems. Luckily, she didn't call upon me. But just the mere mention of such a thing had me hunched over in my seat trying to drown away in my hoodie. I was hiding my face, because I felt my face and neck getting extremely hot and I was getting the shakes and my eyes were tearing up. "don't call me. don't call me. no no no! please no!" I just wanted to disappear! I have no idea what I'm supposed to do when the time comes that she does call upon me. I'm so scared, I don't know why this is so scary to me. But I think the way my body reacts is the scariest thing, because I really can't control it! On top of that, I completely and utterly am horrendous at math, so I KNOW I wouldn't be getting it right anyway. She also went on a 10 minute long rant about how she doesn't accept "I don't know" as an answer. And she assumes anyone who responds with "I don't know" isn't trying. She says she's going to grade us mostly on participation. Dear lord, I guess I'm going to fail then.


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## YoukosoHitoriBocchi (Sep 22, 2012)

I'm sorry if that was a bother, just feeling very scared right now. I'm sorry.


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## outofmycontrol (Oct 14, 2012)

*reply to your message.*

hiya, i know by the sounds of it you must not be from england. i thought i would share my experience with you, i have a real anxiety about people in authority and confrontation, 2 of the worse things in my life, if i get into trouble with a teacher i will just burst into tears, get really hot, fast heart rate, its got so bad that last year would miss college due to worry, and then have more time off because i was worried about what the teacher would say about my time off. i know they cant do anything apart from tell me off but its not so much that, its more because its in front of the whole class and they all look at you. i have sheet im ment to get signed from my placement each week and im behind on my days, this week i didnt go in because i was unwell but emailed my teacher to tell her it was a family emergency, she hasnt replied back and im dreading tomorrow so much that i was actually sick because of the nerves, because she will ask me in front of everyone if i got it signed and i will say no i wasnt in and she will go crazy at me infront of everyone and thats what i hate, the embarsment, why do teachers do that?!?!?! they cant pull you aside or just say ok but its your qualification youl miss out on if u dont pick up your days, not a full blown scolding infront of everyone. :mum i also get worried when i fall out with friends because i have no backbone and think everyone wants to beat up and i pratically faint when someone/anyone tells me off or has a go at me i dont know how some people just say **** it and yell back at the teacher!

now for your situation, iv known teacher slike that my whole life, its because they have been doing this a long time and have no need to take new information on board, the best thing i can say is to confront her, i know i just said that its what im most scared of but i find that by phoning or talking or setting up a meeting with your teacher to explain to them the problem and your worries is best because then you dont have to worry about what there going to say, or can explain to them privertly why u havnt done your homework or whatever reason with no need to feel embarrsed, i would set up a meeting with her and bring in a doctors note and some information on your condition and just ask her if she could sit you at the back, and not ask you questions in class outloud as it makes you uncomfortable. at least then they know, if they are still really horrible talk to someone higher up or a someone you trust.

im so scared about tomorrow and talking to my teacher, im practitcally being sick over it im so scared..but in order to move forward im going to have to face the music....i hate this! x 
goodluck!


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