# What is the naughtiest thing you have ever done?



## Salvador Dali (Oct 26, 2013)

OK, I guess I'll fire it off...

I once looked up a man's kilt.


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## arao6 (Jul 12, 2013)

A woman walked in with a t-shirt and no bra underneath. 'Twas quite an adventure! I was a young teenager at the time though!


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## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

Once I had sexual relations. It was ****ing horrendous.


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## mdiada (Jun 18, 2012)

did sexual things in the work bathroom while on the clock


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

Write over 25mb of smutty fiction.

(Probably not _entirely_ accurate, some of it is repeats, I admit.)

...

I don't get out much, okay? :um


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## CrimsonTrigger (Jun 28, 2011)

Stole some candy from a store once. I was very young and it was just too easy.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

CrimsonTrigger said:


> Stole some candy from a store once. I was very young and it was just too easy.


Stole some easy candy?


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

Keep it within the guideline rules, please. I already had to remove a couple posts.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Kissed 3 guys in one night and had sex with the last one. Another time I also kissed 3 guys and felt up the 2nd guy's crotch. 

Kissing 3 guys in one night is not all that impressive in South America though. They often kiss way more. I'm not into public sex. I only like kissing and feeling up guys in clubs.


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## Zeeshan (Sep 4, 2011)

Oral sex at a park

In daylight


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## dcaffeine (Oct 26, 2013)

I let a girl put her leg on mine while sitting next to her.


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## shelbster18 (Oct 8, 2011)

Gave oral while the guy was driving.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

I like this thread.


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## Idontgetit (Nov 1, 2013)

I peed in the shower.... and enjoyed it


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

Had sex four times in one night, all in different rooms of the house.


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## CrimsonTrigger (Jun 28, 2011)

RelinquishedHell said:


> Stole some easy candy?


No, I mean literally. I just reached into one of those bins and took a couple of pieces of candy. I'm trying to be a little different from everyone else here.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

CrimsonTrigger said:


> No, I mean literally. I just reached into one of those bins and took a couple of pieces of candy. I'm trying to be a little different from everyone else here.


Did you at least wear a glove before you just reached right into that bin?


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## CrimsonTrigger (Jun 28, 2011)

RelinquishedHell said:


> Did you at least wear a glove before you just reached right into that bin?


Nah. Dove in with my mouth and ran my tongue all over.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

CrimsonTrigger said:


> Nah. Dove in with my mouth and ran my tongue all over.


Brave man that takes chances. That's the way it ought to be done right there.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Had an orgasm mid-sentence when I was in the back seat of my friend's car.


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## markwalters2 (Mar 18, 2013)

crimeclub said:


> Got oral while driving, had sexy time in a changing room at Express, got a handy at a concert while we were under a blanket, and this one I'm not proud of at all.. I was on the phone talking to my mom one time and a girl started to go down on me, and I stayed on the phone with my mom a full 3 minutes.


You have been so naughty. Don't expect anything from Santa.



komorikun said:


> Kissed 3 guys in one night and had sex with the last one. Another time I also kissed 3 guys and felt up the 2nd guy's crotch.
> 
> Kissing 3 guys in one night is not all that impressive in South America though. They often kiss way more. I'm not into public sex. I only like kissing and feeling up guys in clubs.


Aggressive lady. I like.


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

I kissed a girl and I liked it.

...no I didn't.


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## inerameia (Jan 26, 2012)

Stealing liquor and getting ****ed up


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## Claudia87 (Aug 19, 2013)

I drew a giant penis and balls on one of my bullies lockers in middle school.


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## Brandeezy (Dec 23, 2009)

Watched porn


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## fanatic203 (Jun 23, 2010)

Had sex in a car while trespassing on some company's property. As we were leaving, a car came by and slowed down wondering what the hell we were doing there, then saw us and started laughing.


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## Valtron (Jul 6, 2013)

I masturbated in my car in the school parking lot. I think someone saw. Oops.


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## zomgz (Aug 17, 2009)

You don't want to know. Or maybe you do, but I'm not tellin'.


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## Tinydancer20 (Jun 17, 2013)

I looked at a man bottom


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## jessabones (Jun 25, 2013)

Moan during sex. lol


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## nullptr (Sep 21, 2012)

I switched the game to 5 different empires and collapsed them consecutively. That's basically cheating.


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## Droidsteel (Mar 22, 2012)

CrimsonTrigger said:


> Stole some candy from a store once. I was very young and it was just too easy.


I did this when I was a teenager lol for a dare, but I ate it while still in the shop. The packet was already open so I doubt anyone minded.


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## Mr Bacon (Mar 10, 2012)

Had a wank inside the WC on a plane. I hope the guy waiting outside the cabin didn't have diarrhea, for his own sake.


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## scooby (Jun 24, 2009)

SAS sure loves their car sex.


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## tooafraid (Nov 22, 2013)

Reading this thread.


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## AlchemyFire (Mar 4, 2013)

I have never done anything naughty. I am 100% pure and innocent.


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## Droidsteel (Mar 22, 2012)

AlchemyFire said:


> I have never done anything naughty. I am 100% pure and innocent.


Being curious enough to look down while naked counts.


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## lockS (Sep 15, 2011)

I wrote a dirty word on an empty pad in a store 
Yeah yeah we have a bad-*** over here...


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## AlchemyFire (Mar 4, 2013)

Droidsteel said:


> Being curious enough to look down while naked counts.


:wtf

This can't be. My life is a lie.


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## scooby (Jun 24, 2009)

My naughtiest thing I've done sounds so dull and boring compared to all you guys and your sexytime confessions. Worst I've done is take a bunch of ecstasy or other illegal substances over the years.


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## riptide (Nov 22, 2013)

wow this is interesting heh


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## Amphoteric (Sep 11, 2011)

Obviously I should be listing all the kinkiest sex things I've taken part in, but I shall go for something officially naughty. 
I threw a snowball at another kid during school recess. Got detention for it.


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## derpresion (May 17, 2012)

stole candies from store with friend and with candies i mean kilos of them lmao xP those were some yummy times ;u;


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## CheekyBunny (Nov 10, 2013)

^ lold hard


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## DarrellLicht (Mar 9, 2013)

CheekyBunny said:


> ^ lold hard


I think they casted the wrong kid for that John Ritter movie 'Problem Child'....


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I don't like moroff anymore.


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## My Name Here (Mar 14, 2013)

When I was around 12 my friend and I filled a large plastic bag with water. My house had a pretty high deck that was close to the road. We waited till a car drove past and threw the bag filled with water at the car, luckily it missed. 

When we noticed the car turning around, we ran and hid in the house. A guy came out of the car and starting pounding on the front door yelling at us to come out. We were scared ****less but we eventually came out. He made us apologize to his girlfriend, told us we could have killed them and to never do it again.

Looking back I was so stupid. That day could have ended off far worst than it had and I am grateful it didn't.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

I masturbated 7 times in one day once, I am a female.

Tried having sex with a guy in a car.

Used candy in a sexual manner.

Received oral sex for almost an hour literally non-stop. We did this in his mom's piano recital room and there were little kids the night before. I also gave him a handjob.

Sexted? I got a whole bunch of naked pics: penis pics alone, full body naked shots including bare ***, strip pictures, video of him talking and showing his whole naked body. All from the guy I like. I had to masturbate that night because I was too horny.


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## Mr Bacon (Mar 10, 2012)

MidnightBlu said:


> I masturbated 7 times in one day once, I am a female.
> 
> Tried having sex with a guy in a car.
> 
> ...


You're making me seriously horny, you bad bad girl :twisted


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

MidnightBlu said:


> I masturbated 7 times in one day once, I am a female.
> 
> Tried having sex with a guy in a car.
> 
> ...


A girl and I had a whole afternoon together just chilling in her room, I gave oral to her for 3 hours off and on, she O-ed 8 times. Not braggin or anything. Yeah I am.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

It's extremely hard for me to orgasm for some reason. I can only orgasm through masturbation or a hand job, that's it.


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## DarrellLicht (Mar 9, 2013)

komorikun said:


> I don't like moroff anymore.


staring into avatar contemplatively... :teeth


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

-I deflated the tires on a cop car while they were drinking coffee inside a restaurant.

-Threw eggs at cop cars on Halloween night.

-Some of the town kids had a campfire party one night and didn't invite me because they were friends with my ex, so i went there when it was dark and pretended to be a bear. It worked better than i expected because the father of this one girl came out running with a shotgun and shot two times in the air. They finished the party inside the house.


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## derpresion (May 17, 2012)

My Name Here said:


> When I was around 12 my friend and I filled a large plastic bag with water. My house had a pretty high deck that was close to the road. We waited till a car drove past and threw the bag filled with water at the car, luckily it missed.
> 
> When we noticed the car turning around, we ran and hid in the house. A guy came out of the car and starting pounding on the front door yelling at us to come out. We were scared ****less but we eventually came out. He made us apologize to his girlfriend, told us we could have killed them and to never do it again.
> 
> Looking back I was so stupid. That day could have ended off far worst than it had and I am grateful it didn't.


we lived near to road and had similar game too. apart from water bombs we threw diff other **** too and we were throwing at bypassing ppl not cars so much, the most fun thing was with flour until we hit some mans head making him all white, he got so pissed he found our flat and started ringing furiously, we were scared as hell xP and other time we pissed off some guy who was late to date (he was yelling about it at us lol) and he threw rock hard snowball into our window almost braking it ^^
btw ew at most stories here


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## CrimsonTrigger (Jun 28, 2011)

MidnightBlu said:


> I masturbated 7 times in one day once, I am a female.


That's nothing. I was able to go 10-15 times in a row once, maybe even more. I lost count after a while. I'm not capable of doing it anymore, but trust me, it can be done.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

As a female. I don't think there are a lot of women that can masturbate 7 times a day.


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## fineline (Oct 21, 2011)

naughty? hmm, quite a list there. 

sex with a stripper in the strip club VIP area. felt pretty dirty after that. i was drunk. meh.

OR

had sex with a woman while her husband watched. yep. and yea, it was kind of weird. lol. (he did not care)


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

Dammit I just want sex with Kenneth (guy who sent me naked stuff) and get it over with. He is the only guy that is allowed to have sex with me without a relationship right now.


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## housebunny (Oct 22, 2010)

Valtron said:


> I masturbated in my car in the school parking lot. I think someone saw. Oops.


Wow, Valton, you don't hear very often about women doing things like that. :lol You inspired me to confess one. Once I masturbated on the school bus when I was in jr. high. We lived way out in the country and my house was the last stop on the 45 minute bus ride. I think the bus driver saw me, too, and it haunted me after that.


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## Mr Bacon (Mar 10, 2012)

housebunny said:


> Wow, Valton, you don't hear very often about women doing things like that. :lol You inspired me to confess one. Once I masturbated on the school bus when I was in jr. high. We lived way out in the country and my house was the last stop on the 45 minute bus ride. I think the bus driver saw me, too, and it haunted me after that.


housebunny, it appears I was wrong about you. You are in fact not a Seraphim :lol


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

housebunny said:


> Wow, Valton, you don't hear very often about women doing things like that. :lol You inspired me to confess one. Once I masturbated on the school bus when I was in jr. high. We lived way out in the country and my house was the last stop on the 45 minute bus ride. I think the bus driver saw me, too, and it haunted me after that.


That reminds me I used to randomly squeeze my legs together in class just cause it felt good.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

I gave myself sex on auto pilot of course/


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

Oh yeah I wore ****ty lingerie with garters and stockings right before sex for my ex before.

We tried having sex while I was wearing fishnet, it didn't work out haha.


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## Idontgetit (Nov 1, 2013)

pics please


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

MidnightBlu said:


> Oh yeah I wore ****ty lingerie with garters and stockings right before sex for my ex before.
> 
> We tried having sex while I was wearing fishnet, it didn't work out haha.


Pics or it didn't fappin- I mean happen.


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## moloko (May 1, 2013)

I don't know... Hit a cop with a stick when I was like 4, just because, when I didn't even distinguish right from wrong? After reading this thread I guess I'm officially a boring person. I can't actually think of anything else besides stealing a pair of sunglasses, which still haunts me to this day.


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## DarrellLicht (Mar 9, 2013)

likeaspacemonkey said:


> You were one of them psycho kids I'm afraid of. They've got evil in their eyes :no lol


Would you believe me I went all this time, until today without mentioning this?. I never told my close friends this dudes..



> Signature high five by the way!


lol, I haven't originally noticed


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## markwalters2 (Mar 18, 2013)

MidnightBlu said:


> Oh yeah I wore ****ty lingerie with garters and stockings right before sex for my ex before.
> 
> We tried having sex while I was wearing fishnet, it didn't work out haha.


Same here.


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## Glass Child (Feb 28, 2013)

I went to school/had recess during winter, and forgot to take any gloves with me. Mother was upset.


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## catcharay (Sep 15, 2011)

I stole a PK chewing gum when I was around 5 yo. More recently, I accidentally stole an umbrella (oops). Such was the state of my mind that I completely forgot it was strapped around my wrist


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## bwells (Nov 13, 2013)

I thought I posted on here already but apparently not, I once had a girl snort cocaine off my private part. 

I have stories for days but that is by far the naughtiest.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

You did post but I think it got deleted haha, my post was edited.


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## SapphireBoy (Nov 23, 2013)

I allowed my dad to twerk on me.


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## bwells (Nov 13, 2013)

crimeclub said:


> You did post but I think it got deleted haha, my post was edited.


Apparently their is a such thing as to naughty for this thread.


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

meganmila said:


> That reminds me I used to randomly squeeze my legs together in class just cause it felt good.


I used to shift around on my bicycle seat for similar reasons. ;_;

And that's *literally* as much experience as I have in that area, almost everyone else in this thread has me way beat, it seems.


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## bwells (Nov 13, 2013)

I have also spanked it at all my friends houses when I spent the night when I was younger, when they were all asleep. 

Plus all the ding dong ditching eggs and oranges I have thrown at cars. Putting traffic cones in the middle of the road and watching cars turn around. Putting traffic cones in the middle of the road and when the cars turned around throwing oranges at the cars. Egging houses. Other miscellaneous acts of vandalism. 

I have now realized I am an evil person.


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## Parsnip (Sep 5, 2013)

meganmila said:


> That reminds me I used to randomly squeeze my legs together in class just cause it felt good.


I was actually just wondering if other women did this. Now I know.


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## h00dz (Dec 25, 2012)

Wow this thread just reminds me how I have not lived....


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## mdiada (Jun 18, 2012)

oh, i'd forgotten the couple times with my ex when we had sex outside in the bed of his truck, and we were so loud we woke up his baby niece who was sleeping in the house. ops
also, sex in a car in the public park at 10am on a sunday. and in the back parking lot near the security cameras at my current job.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

One time I sent someone a wink smiley. :eek


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

1.) I've masturbated several times while my roommate was in the room sleeping this year. And once let out a pretty audible moan lol.

2.) And I shared this before but I masturbated in the backseat during a roadtrip with my family.

3.) Cam sex? That doesn't seem very naughty though, since it's gotten more common.



tehuti88 said:


> Write over 25mb of smutty fiction.
> 
> (Probably not _entirely_ accurate, some of it is repeats, I admit.)
> 
> ...


LOL, nice! :clap



Zeeshan said:


> Oral sex at a park
> 
> In daylight


That sounds fun. :b


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

Had sneaky sex on the couch this morning under a blanket while my girlfriend's mom was right around the corner in the next room.


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

h00dz said:


> Wow this thread just reminds me how I have not lived....


Yeah... must develop a self-lockout for these types of threads...


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## bwells (Nov 13, 2013)

mdiada said:


> oh, i'd forgotten the couple times with my ex when we had sex outside in the bed of his truck, and we were so loud we woke up his baby niece who was sleeping in the house. ops
> also, sex in a car in the public park at 10am on a sunday. and in the back parking lot near the security cameras at my current job.


where have you been all my life?


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

mdiada said:


> oh, i'd forgotten the couple times with my ex when we had sex outside in the bed of his truck, and we were so loud we woke up his baby niece who was sleeping in the house. ops
> also, sex in a car in the public park at 10am on a sunday. and in the back parking lot near the security cameras at my current job.


You ARE a naughty girl.


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## GotAnxiety (Oct 14, 2011)

Recently masturbating 10-12 hours every day this week. Full time job now my arms have disintregrated into toothpicks only busted a couple time.

Live sex shows on fubar with my ex.

I should just be creative and design some kinda masturbation machine for guys with multi masturbation settings. I'd be rich. Then that will save are arms hassle free masterbation.


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## fanatic203 (Jun 23, 2010)

tehuti88 said:


> I used to shift around on my bicycle seat for similar reasons. ;_;


Haha, when bicycles were invented, people were afraid of women riding them for this exact reason! :teeth


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

fanatic203 said:


> Haha, when bicycles were invented, people were afraid of women riding them for this exact reason! :teeth





> That bike riding might be sexually stimulating for women was also a real concern to many in the 1890s. It was thought that straddling a saddle combined with the motion required to propel a bicycle would lead to arousal. So-called "hygienic" saddles began to appear, saddles with little or no padding where a woman's genitalia would ordinarily make contact with the seat. High stems and upright handlebars, as opposed to the more aggressively positioned "drop" handlebars, also were thought to reduce the risk of female sexual stimulation by reducing the angle at which a woman would be forced to ride.


http://www.annielondonderry.com/womenWheels.html

Ahaha, oh my. I learn something new every day. :lol


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## markwalters2 (Mar 18, 2013)

RelinquishedHell said:


> Had sneaky sex on the couch this morning under a blanket while my girlfriend's mom was right around the corner in the next room.


That is more heroic more anything


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## Kalliber (Aug 18, 2012)

I went to craiglist..


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## Juno1984 (Nov 5, 2013)

Amphoteric said:


> Obviously I should be listing all the kinkiest sex things I've taken part in, but I shall go for something officially naughty.
> I threw a snowball at another kid during school recess. Got detention for it.


I have nothing like that either, but I did something I completely regret... I made a girl follow me to a bench during playtime and I picked up a handful of dust and blew it into her eyes :-( It was all premeditated.

Well years later I mentioned it and she chose not to talk to me on facebook :stu


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## Veritastar (Aug 16, 2011)

I took an extra piece of cake.


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## housebunny (Oct 22, 2010)

Kalliber said:


> I went to craiglist..


Craigslist is the naughtiest.



Juno1984 said:


> I made a girl follow me to a bench during playtime and I picked up a handful of dust and blew it into her eyes :-( It was all premeditated.


Why'd ja do it?


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## Juno1984 (Nov 5, 2013)

I just remembered... When I was about 9, we lived on the top floor of our block of flats and the family on the ground floor were coming into their house directly underneath. I was alone on the balcony and I just decided to time a big phlegm spit so it would land on top of one of the people's heads.

I ducked down but obviously didn't wait long enough :afr 

I was scared but stood up and suddenly a woman started shouting up to me saying how I'd ruined her friends weave and that she was coming to beat me up. I ran indoors and I confessed to my brother. I felt so bad. 

Another time was when my brother and I threw water bombs out of the bedroom window and timed them so they exploded right in front of people and they got soaked we laughed and ducked down so no one noticed. Pretty bad.


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## Juno1984 (Nov 5, 2013)

housebunny said:


> Why'd ja do it?


I'm thinking... it was probably because I was jealous that she always got positive attention from the teachers that I longed for. Hugs in the playground from them and praise for her work from our teacher. I tried so hard to impress and got no attention. I'd forgotten why I did it until you just asked.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

I passed in the wrong type of arguments to a function once... 

The compile errors were brutal :cry


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## nullptr (Sep 21, 2012)

Paper Samurai said:


> I passed in the wrong type of arguments to a function once...
> 
> The compile errors were brutal :cry


You naughty programmer *slaps you*


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## karenw (Aug 20, 2012)

jessabones said:


> Moan during sex. lol


:lol


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## Colhad75 (Dec 14, 2009)

Never done a naughty thing so I really am a saint.


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

Well this one time I stole a cookie from the cookie jar.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

markwalters2 said:


> That is more heroic more anything


Lol. We made a mess. Was not easy to get away with that.


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## Nunuc (Jul 9, 2013)

AceEmoKid said:


> Well this one time I stole a cookie from the cookie jar.


WHAT!!!? :wife


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

Nunuc said:


> WHAT!!!? :wife












I regret nothing.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

galacticsenator said:


> You naughty programmer *slaps you*


Technically speaking, in some languages that type of thing is actually ok. :b

In PHP for example, you can pass in 0 arguments to an argument taking function as well as passing in more values than there are function parameters. I'm sure if PHP were not dynamically typed, you could probably pass in wrong types as well :teeth


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## mdiada (Jun 18, 2012)

bwells said:


> where have you been all my life?


You can catch me totally naked, hangin out with drunk penguins and limegreen elephants making sweet sweet love to each other.


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## mdiada (Jun 18, 2012)

crimeclub said:


> You ARE a naughty girl.


My ex's sister was FURIOUS that we woke up her baby. She seriously posted about it on facebook, and by the next day, everyone she worked with knew. Talk about truly embarrassing.


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## bwells (Nov 13, 2013)

mdiada said:


> You can catch me totally naked, hangin out with drunk penguins and limegreen elephants making sweet sweet love to each other.


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## housebunny (Oct 22, 2010)

AceEmoKid said:


> I regret nothing.


Heheh! :lol


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## cosmicslop (Nov 24, 2012)

Used brown sugar instead when it specified white sugar.


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## silent night (Jul 18, 2013)

I stole a pair of ear rings, then felt really bad afterwards.


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## Salvador Dali (Oct 26, 2013)

I'm really surprised at how many posts this thread has got. I've just been reading through all the pages...
Oh God, what have I created!?


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## housebunny (Oct 22, 2010)

Salvador Dali said:


> I'm really surprised at how many posts this thread has got. I've just been reading through all the pages...
> Oh God, what have I created!?


A cascade of naughtiness.



Kekai said:


> I can't think of naughty things I done, but naughty things that have been done to me come to mind.
> 
> In one of my classes, *this girl spanked me*! It happened so quick, I had to stop and collect myself and try grasp what happened. All I could see when I looked behind was the most evil of smirks one could posses.
> 
> And-and in another class, *this guy spanked me*, real hard! Everybody heard the impact echo through the lecture hall. Faces smiling, like they witnessed something glorious. My class mates were eager to see some guy-on-guy action. Alas, to no avail.


I want a turn! The line to spank Kekai forms here!


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## BelowtheCurrent (Mar 14, 2013)

I did this rather often, when was around 10 or so. I used to stand on the roof of our apartment building and quickly light fireworks (the fire cracker ones) and throw them at people down below. Especially people carrying things, I remember once I hit a lady's ice cream while she was eating it. It was like the devil was striking at these poor earthlings. Fun times. 

I also remember throwing paper airplanes at the my older sister's tutor from one balcony to the next. My siblings and I were so obnoxious, that my sister and her tutor had to study on the balcony. Although there was another balcony directly across from it and we would throw crap to the other side and bang with a broom on the ledge. Oh god, we were awful, the tutor never came back after that.


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

mdiada said:


> You can catch me totally naked, hangin out with drunk penguins and limegreen elephants making sweet sweet love to each other.


My mind read that in a Barry White voice.



Kekai said:


> Another time was when I was playing doodoo ball, and this girl tried tackling me, and she grabbed my sausage!


...What? :shock


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## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

I once threw a pencil at the teacher...


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## Charmander (Sep 5, 2012)

So much kink in this thread; this will be boring. 

Well there are a couple things from childhood that stand out. I kicked a hole in my parent's wall (only kicked it once) in frustration because they were going to make me wear this really awful outfit to go out in.

I poured sand from a bucket onto a PE teacher's head thinking that he'd find it funny, he didn't.
Also dropped a roll of toilet paper onto a teacher's head in secondary school, post-SA. 

Poked my head out of the car window and shouted hello to a woman riding a bike on a main road. She shrieked and fell off. I still feel bad about that one. 

Played catch with a firecracker type thing with my friend's elder brother and we nearly set the house on fire.


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## moloko (May 1, 2013)

tehuti88 said:


> My mind read that in a Barry White voice.


Ahahah, that was perfect! 

_My darling I... Can't get enough of your love baby..._

I just had to go to youtube after this one.


----------



## cmed (Oct 17, 2009)

When I was a teenager and first got a car a friend and I were out driving around one night. We were in a Blockbuster parking lot and saw some couple in the window looking at movies. My friend dared me to throw the cup of soda he had at the window (some fast food beverage,) so I got out of the car and did it. It scared the crap out of both of them, then I ran back to the car and we drove off laughing like maniacs.


----------



## HellAbove (Jan 25, 2013)

Making out on the FIRST date.
_*sex on the second.*_


----------



## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

I use to shopleft a lot as a kid until i got caught. I actually got hand cuffed and went to go get finger printed.


----------



## hammerfast (Mar 8, 2012)

I knew this gay guy in Vancouver , and that's the naughtiest.


----------



## Nunuc (Jul 9, 2013)

hammerfast said:


> I knew this gay guy in Vancouver , and that's the naughtiest.


I know this place called Vancouver. Naughty, naughty Nunuc...


----------



## hammerfast (Mar 8, 2012)

Nunuc said:


> I know this place called Vancouver. Naughty, naughty Nunuc...


Vancouver is indeed nasty , it's the san Francisco of Canada , no real economy , lots of yachts , eastern European prostitutes , and of course gays


----------



## housebunny (Oct 22, 2010)

Kekai said:


> How does this happen?


Well, it wasn't that big of a deal except that it was inappropriate. We lived way out in the country, so the whole bus ride was almost an hour long. Toward the end of the ride, I would be the only one left on the bus with still a long way to go, so I would lie down in my seat in the back and sleep. I thought the bus driver couldn't see me back there, and one time I just touched myself. But then when I went to get off the bus, he gave me a weird look and I knew he must have seen me and I was horrified. I never did it again.


----------



## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

housebunny said:


> Well, it wasn't that big of a deal except that it was inappropriate. We lived way out in the country, so the whole bus ride was almost an hour long. Toward the end of the ride, I would be the only one left on the bus with still a long way to go, so I would lie down in my seat in the back and sleep. I thought the bus driver couldn't see me back there, and one time I just touched myself. But then when I went to get off the bus, he gave me a weird look and I knew he must have seen me and I was horrified. I never did it again.


 lmao


----------



## housebunny (Oct 22, 2010)

blue2 said:


> lmao


 :lol Sure, laugh at my misfortune.

Have you done something similar?


----------



## Raphael200 (Aug 18, 2012)

I'm clean I guess : (


----------



## TheFather (Sep 20, 2012)

Baked some cookies at 451 degrees....


----------



## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

Kekai said:


> The sausage was grabbed, and then it was yanked.  She really wanted to win&#8230; She didn't let go until I was dragging her across the field. So I guess, actually, it was the good ol' sausage tug 'n' tow.


I was thinking "sausage" was a sporting term I was unfamiliar with, and this was an unintended double entendre, but I guess I was wrong, it really was what it sounded like! :lol

Still, what is "doodoo ball"...?



hammerfast said:


> Vancouver is indeed nasty , it's the san Francisco of Canada , no real economy , lots of yachts , eastern European prostitutes , and of course gays


Damn yachts, ruining everything that's good about Canada...



Ahvav said:


> And logged in to disney.com without my parents permission
> #thuglife


HARDCORE! :teeth


----------



## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

hammerfast said:


> Vancouver is indeed nasty , it's the san Francisco of Canada , no real economy , lots of yachts , eastern European prostitutes , and of course gays


San Francisco seems nice though (but no I've not been there), supposedly it's the Brighton of... The US? Of California anyway. There's also trams.


----------



## The Islander (Nov 11, 2013)

Stealing a couple of legos from kindergarten. I live in constant fear of the police coming to arrest me for life :afr


----------



## gunner21 (Aug 4, 2012)

Bought GTA when I was under 18. I'm a badass.


----------



## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

Nitrogen said:


> i met a girl named scarlett, and told her to get constructive face-to-butt surgery on my butt.


stop impersonating people omg


----------



## coldsorehighlighter (Jun 2, 2010)

At 17 years old, my girlfriend's mother was the secretary for their church so she had an office inside the church. My girlfriend and I had sex in there. :blank

(Sorry to all the people here who haven't had sex yet, I'm not trying to bother you by posting this)


----------



## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

I'll tell when the statute of limitations expires.


----------



## bwells (Nov 13, 2013)

Theoretically, when do the statute of limitations end on calling in a bomb threat to the special Olympics?


----------



## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

gunner21 said:


> Bought GTA when I was under 18. I'm a badass.


Huh, that reminds me, I watched _Heavy Metal_ when I was a little kid, but it was actually my brother who had illicitly brought it home to watch, and I had no real idea WTF was going on so it didn't scar me.

Ditto with _Faces Of Death_, he illicitly brought that home to watch and so I watched it, too.

Hm.


----------



## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

Kekai said:


> "Where art thou, pooty-ball?"
> 
> Doo-doo ball is the best thing in the world! It's like reenacting the scenes on NatGeo when the lion chases down the wilderbeast. Or when a cheetah chases down a cheeto.
> 
> ...


As I said before, I do learn something new every day. :lol


----------



## zomgz (Aug 17, 2009)

I was a pole dancer at a club, briefly. 

Good pay, great exercise, but very degrading. Would not attempt in the future.


----------



## DeniseAfterAll (Jul 28, 2012)

zomgz said:


> I was a pole dancer at a club, briefly.
> 
> Good pay, great exercise, but very degrading. Would not attempt in the future.


Wow . . you sure are full of surprises ! :um


----------



## zomgz (Aug 17, 2009)

DeniseAfterAll said:


> Wow . . you sure are full of surprises ! :um


Gotta keep you on your toes! Haha. :teeth


----------



## misspeachy (Aug 11, 2011)

I've stolen from shops... ha-ha.. such a rebel! 
Dialed 999 for a joke when I was about seven.
Accidentally caused fires.
Chucked apples at my neighbours.
Apart from that, nothing else really unless I spend all day remembering... I'm such a goody!


----------



## Donkeybutt (May 3, 2013)

When I was 8 years old, I found a dead squirrel on the side of the road, picked it up, and put it on my neighbor's door step. The next morning, I heard a shriek and had a good laugh, but was also freaked out that I was gonna get busted or something, and never did thankfully.:wink

Also, when I was 16 years old, I ran out onto the sidewalk and kicked some random guy in the crotch and ran away before he could get to me, which he wasn't in any condition to do so.:lol


----------



## markwalters2 (Mar 18, 2013)

Donkeybutt said:


> Also, when I was 16 years old, I ran out onto the sidewalk and kicked some random guy in the crotch and ran away before he could get to me, which he wasn't in any condition to do so.:lol


So, it was you.


----------



## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

sex with one of my ex-es in the park at nigh, people were passing by quite close...yeah we were both kinda drunk


----------



## Donkeybutt (May 3, 2013)

markwalters2 said:


> So, it was you.


Yup. I enjoy hurting innocent males for no reason whatsoever. The last time I did it was about 8 months ago, but I guess my aim wasn't good that one time and the guy started chasing me down the street:afr Not doing _that_ again, that's for sure.


----------



## caveofmystery (Nov 1, 2013)

went to justin bieber fans' gathering o_o


----------



## markwalters2 (Mar 18, 2013)

caveofmystery said:


> went to justin bieber fans' gathering o_o


Deserve a good spanking.


----------



## ApatheticDisplay (Dec 4, 2013)

I was once removed the tag from a pillow that said "DO NOT REMOVE"


----------



## Hermiter (Dec 15, 2013)

One time i picked up a penny on the road


----------



## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

zomgz said:


> I was a pole dancer at a club, briefly.
> 
> Good pay, great exercise, but very degrading. Would not attempt in the future.


This might sound odd... but I can't help but admire people who do that in a way, if only because of the sheer bravery I imagine it would require to get up and do that in front of a room full of people. I certainly don't think I could even attempt that.

But yeah, I also get why it would be degrading too, so I wouldn't want to ignore or condone that unpleasant aspect of it either.


----------



## ineverwipe (Jun 16, 2013)

I took a dump on the bathroom floor at my high school. It was on my last day there. It should have gone into a few lockers but oh well.

Oh and I also took a dump at a park in my hometown. Left that brown rag doll next to a tree. But that time was a nature calls type of thing. I got my karma payback immediately because I ended up peeing a little on myself because I forgot that I usually pee a little when I poop


----------



## ApatheticDisplay (Dec 4, 2013)

ineverwipe said:


> I took a dump on the bathroom floor at my high school. It was on my last day there. It should have gone into a few lockers but oh well.
> 
> Oh and I also took a dump at a park in my hometown. Left that brown rag doll next to a tree. But that time was a nature calls type of thing. I got my karma payback immediately because I ended up peeing a little on myself because I forgot that I usually pee a little when I poop


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Did various things with my used feminine hygiene products to gross out my exes. Put a used pad on the wall. They stick quite well! Twirled a few tampons near their head.


----------



## Valtron (Jul 6, 2013)

The Islander said:


> Stealing a couple of legos from kindergarten. I live in constant fear of the police coming to arrest me for life :afr


That reminds of one time when I went to Subway, and the guy gave me back way too much change. I felt like I robbed them, and the police were going to hunt me down.

Oh and also at Subway, my brother got a drink and it seemed like every soda was low on syrup. He filled his cup to the top, took a sip, and then dunk it out. Then he filled it up again with another soda and realized that one tasted bad too. Happened once more. They finally kicked us out because they thought we were purposely wasting their soda.


----------



## Thedood (Nov 27, 2013)

This is me while reading this thread:


----------



## Crimson Lotus (Jul 26, 2013)

I once convinced (well, she was into it as well of course) a close lady friend of mine to come to my place for a weekend and we ended up having sex that involved an extremely revealing maid outfit, BDSM practices and certain... Acts not commonly seen outside of pornography :lol.

It was quite interesting how two rather conservative individuals can get caught in the moment and end up doing things so apparently out of character; but there's something so liberating about leaving every inhibition aside and just doing whatever you want, you end up feeling almost like a different person.


----------



## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

^pics? opcorn


----------



## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

ApatheticDisplay said:


> I was once removed the tag from a pillow that said "DO NOT REMOVE"


I did that to a matress once


----------



## regimes (Aug 24, 2011)

i waaant to contribute but i feel like it would come back to haunt me omg


----------



## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

TicklemeRingo said:


> ^pics? opcorn


I second this. Sounds hawt.


----------



## extremly (Oct 25, 2012)

I didn't read the first page but I'm guessing sexual leaning things count? Can you even say it or only in the 18+ section?

Edit: NVM lol I regained my consciousness I couldn't I would feel like a duche


----------



## To22 (Apr 6, 2012)

regimes said:


> i waaant to contribute but i feel like it would come back to haunt me omg


it will
mwahaha


----------



## Elad (Dec 6, 2009)

the only thing that immediately comes to mind is public sex. although it was always dark at night, so maybe that doesn't count so much.

beach, park bushes at 7am with people walking their dogs going past (wot), and in the alley behind my old work particularly. the latter more because no one knew about it, so it was like "oh yeah we have to stay behind a bit, its alright though, you can head home ". dat lustful anticipation.


----------



## Nonsensical (Mar 29, 2013)

I once woke up with two females in my apartment and I couldn't remember how or why.

This is how I went, 5 am, I'm still drunk, tuesday morning. My alarm goes off and I hear a female voice say "do you have to work?" and quite frankly I **** a brick. I tried to usher them out of my apart asap. On their way out they asked my number and I gave them a fake one. I started trying to sober up and showering. While I was in the shower one of the girls just walks into my apartment and opens up my shower curtain and starts cussing me out for giving them a fake number.

I was 2 hours late for work. Boss wasn't even mad after I came clean about why I wasn't really there he just laughed his *** off.

I'll probably post more here later.


----------



## Testsubject (Nov 25, 2013)

I think the naughtiest things I've done was back in my last year of high school first few years of college. I would acquire photos of girls I liked in my classes via photobucket.


----------



## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Elad said:


> the only thing that immediately comes to mind is public sex. although it was always dark at night, so maybe that doesn't count so much.
> 
> beach, park bushes at 7am with people walking their dogs going past (wot), and in the alley behind my old work particularly. the latter more because no one knew about it, so it was like "oh yeah we have to stay behind a bit, its alright though, you can head home ". dat lustful anticipation.


:cry So jelly.


----------



## ApatheticDisplay (Dec 4, 2013)

My ex and I were in her small town (long distance relationship) We went to a park at night. I have to point out that I'm not familiar with anything and she had me drive into the back entrance of the park. We were sitting in a gazebo fooling around then she gets up and takes me to the ladies room near by. We had sex needless to say but afterwards as we were walking out she points to the building to the left of us and says that's the police station. Like I said I wasn't familiar with anything and didn't know it was there. My anxiety kicked in and I FREAKED OUT thinking at the possibility that we could of gotten caught. She thought it was hilarious.


----------



## aGenericUsername (Apr 7, 2013)

I once killed a man..


----------



## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*Intelligence beyond*

walked a bit too fast in a mall or outside

told a person they couldn't speak to me because they were too stupid and hadn't learnt how to use the language we share. Not a one-off incident. Everyone. Stranger: valueless
call it quits
any more response for them, as an attack towards me, I ask the name of their country leader, as a linguist test, or a myriad of others. Never an answer provided. Offense to ask a question.


----------



## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

aGenericUsername said:


> I once killed a man..


...just to watch him die!


----------



## Moonchild23 (Aug 20, 2013)

I too am guilt of removing the tags from the mattress. I made sure I was alone first.

When I was little I would climb the tree in the summer and make weird noises and talk. It freaked everyone who walked or jogged by out.

I got kicked out of a church in Poland by a nun speaking Spanish. I swear it was my comrades that were being noisy and un-churchly though! 

Once I accidentally walked out of Home Depot with a light fixture. My dad neglected to tell me to put it on the counter to pay for it. 

I have so much shame.


----------



## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

I'm assuming we're only referring to 2013.

I would say, I let a guy in public get off on me while all the while playing naive. The act of frotteurism. Being in close quarters, him taking advantage of that and rubbing himself against your backside. At first I was going to push him off because he wasn't aesthetically pleasing but it amazed me how solid he was and how I could actually feel something. :lol


----------



## Justmeandmyguitar (Nov 24, 2013)

….I'd prefer not to get banned.


----------



## hasbeenpugged (Nov 10, 2013)

Which one is more naughty?:

Public sexyness in a park, various change rooms, movie theatre (well, it was pretty empty)

or, as a young boy (grade 2), I made my female friend who had to go to the washroom, laugh so hard that she peed her pants. I don't do this anymore.


----------



## Testsubject (Nov 25, 2013)

calichick said:


> I'm assuming we're only referring to 2013.
> 
> I would say, I let a guy in public get off on me while all the while playing naive. The act of frotteurism. Being in close quarters, him taking advantage of that and rubbing himself against your backside. At first I was going to push him off because he wasn't aesthetically pleasing but it amazed me how solid he was and how I could actually feel something. :lol


Was this a complete stranger? Did it happen while riding on some from of public transportation?


----------



## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

calichick said:


> I'm assuming we're only referring to 2013.
> 
> I would say, I let a guy in public get off on me while all the while playing naive. The act of frotteurism. Being in close quarters, him taking advantage of that and rubbing himself against your backside. At first I was going to push him off because he wasn't aesthetically pleasing but it amazed me how solid he was and how I could actually feel something. :lol


 /Thread


----------



## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

Testsubject said:


> Was this a complete stranger? Did it happen while riding on some from of public transportation?


Yes, we were on a really crowded bus and he just happened to get on at the next stop. There was a space next to me and he almost pushed everyone down trying to get it. At first, I really didn't know what was happening since I'd never experienced that before. I attributed it to the bus jolting, but when we came to a rest, his poker stick still happened to be up my bum. I was amazed in the first place that I could feel something since he was wearing a thick pair of jeans but he was grinding it so hard, I felt like he definitely violated me.


----------



## Testsubject (Nov 25, 2013)

calichick said:


> Yes, we were on a really crowded bus and he just happened to get on at the next stop. There was a space next to me and he almost pushed everyone down trying to get it. At first, I really didn't know what was happening since I'd never experienced that before. I attributed it to the bus jolting, but when we came to a rest, his poker stick still happened to be up my bum. I was amazed in the first place that I could feel something since he was wearing a thick pair of jeans but he was grinding it so hard, I felt like he definitely violated me.


Yeah this sort of thing has been going on for a long time but seem to be getting more popular recently. Countless articles being published on it at least. Thanks for sharing lol. You are awesome!


----------



## Elad (Dec 6, 2009)

calichick said:


> Yes, we were on a really crowded bus and he just happened to get on at the next stop. There was a space next to me and he almost pushed everyone down trying to get it. At first, I really didn't know what was happening since I'd never experienced that before. I attributed it to the bus jolting, but when we came to a rest, his poker stick still happened to be up my bum. I was amazed in the first place that I could feel something since he was wearing a thick pair of jeans but he was grinding it so hard, I felt like he definitely violated me.


you let some old man release in his pants from dry humping you.

bless your heart.


----------



## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Did I post here before or was there another thread? Nothing much. I've committed a few civil offences (trespass on abandoned properties I think, and swimming where I shouldn't be swimming) and I once picked up a cone that was lying around on the pavement and moved it a couple of streets away. I don't remember why.


----------



## To22 (Apr 6, 2012)

Persephone The Dread said:


> Did I post here before or was there another thread? Nothing much.* I've committed a few civil offences and I once picked up a cone that was lying around on the pavement and moved it a couple of streets away. I don't remember why.*


This made me lol


----------



## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

Elad said:


> you let some old man release in his pants from dry humping you.
> 
> bless your heart.


Actually I was going to say, he wasn't old or homeless.

He was like your average, 30 year old working class guy. If he was a bit taller, he might have even been....good-looking.

Nice pic by the way


----------



## Elad (Dec 6, 2009)

calichick said:


> Actually I was going to say, he wasn't old or homeless.
> 
> He was like your average, 30 year old working class guy. If he was a bit taller, he might have even been....good-looking.
> 
> Nice pic by the way


oh i was picturing someone like this










i'm amazed people have the balls to do that sort of thing and even more amazed that people get away with it. how does someone get away with grinding on you that hard without other people noticing?

and thank you, that means a lot considering i'm not ethnic


----------



## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

Elad said:


> i'm amazed people have the balls to do that sort of thing and even more amazed that people get away with it. how does someone get away with grinding on you that hard without other people noticing?
> 
> and thank you, that means a lot considering i'm not ethnic


He looked like this, just your regular grade B douchiness










And I think other people definitely noticed. The expression on their face "That dumb small town girl". Yes, maybe I'm not from the city and don't know common mannerisms enough to not encourage this type of behavior but let it ride out. lol The act of frotteurism is actually pretty discreet. When you're on a bus, jam packed like sardines, and he's swaying to the motions, it's not as apparent as it seems. (I hear this happens on a daily basis in Japan? Not so much in the US though because we're so ANTI sexual harassment!! Men cant even look at women without her crying bloody murder )

Also, EXOTIC. Not ethnic. Ethnic implies homogeneous. Exotic does not.


----------



## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

He was smelling me too. Not only do they want to frisk you, but they want to imagine that they actually know you. your scent..


----------



## VanGogh (Jan 13, 2013)

Does naughty have to be something sexual? I have a bunch of stories along those lines but they are boring to me.

I do have non-sexual stories that I wish I could share but don't know the legal ramifications of them. I know they break moral and ethical grounds but I would still share them if I knew for sure that sharing them would be legally prudent.


----------



## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

VanGogh said:


> Does naughty have to be something sexual? I have a bunch of stories along those lines but they are boring to me.
> 
> I do have non-sexual stories that I wish I could share but don't know the legal ramifications of them. I know they break moral and ethical grounds but I would still share them if I knew for sure that sharing them would be legally prudent.


Naughty to me implies something which doesn't have serious 'legal' ramifications. It's an insignificant act or gesture.

Naughty is not killing someone, harming someone or stealing something.

It warrants a slap on the hand and a stern look from mother.


----------



## VanGogh (Jan 13, 2013)

calichick said:


> Naughty to me implies something which doesn't have serious 'legal' ramifications. It's an insignificant act or gesture.
> 
> Naughty is not killing someone, harming someone or stealing something.
> 
> It warrants a slap on the hand and a stern look from mother.


Then anything I have to share is way beyond naughty.


----------



## JH1983 (Nov 14, 2013)

Persephone The Dread said:


> Did I post here before or was there another thread? Nothing much. I've committed a few civil offences (trespass on abandoned properties I think, and swimming where I shouldn't be swimming) and I once picked up a cone that was lying around on the pavement and moved it a couple of streets away. I don't remember why.


One time when I was a teenager I put several of these blinking road signs in my trunk and took them to another town and blocked a four-way intersection with them in the middle of the night. I went to a friend's house nearby and watched what people would do from his porch, most just navigated around them and apparently didn't care if the road was "closed" or not.


----------



## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

calichick said:


> He looked like this, just your regular grade B douchiness


 Actually, that guy is very attractive (from what I can see of him). If I looked like that, I'd have had a much more eventful life. At least in terms of my encounters with women.

I only wish I looked like that.


----------



## markwalters2 (Mar 18, 2013)

calichick said:


> I'm assuming we're only referring to 2013.
> 
> I would say, I let a guy in public get off on me while all the while playing naive. The act of frotteurism. Being in close quarters, him taking advantage of that and rubbing himself against your backside. At first I was going to push him off because he wasn't aesthetically pleasing but it amazed me how solid he was and how I could actually feel something. :lol


Did it cross your mind to have him arrested?


----------



## VanGogh (Jan 13, 2013)

markwalters2 said:


> Did it cross your mind to have him arrested?


You must have missed a few posts down where she makes it clear she allowed it because it was a sexual thrill for her. She didn't seek it out nor did she find the idea of someone basically molesting her in public without her consent something normal or acceptable - but she allowed it because it was a momentary cheap thrill.


----------



## markwalters2 (Mar 18, 2013)

VanGogh said:


> You must have missed a few posts down where she makes it clear she allowed it because it was a sexual thrill for her. She didn't seek it out nor did she find the idea of someone basically molesting her in public without her consent something normal or acceptable - but she allowed it because it was a momentary cheap thrill.


Cum to think about it, if a woman rubbed herself against me, it would be rather thrilling too. Good call.


----------



## mjkittredge (Sep 8, 2012)

this thread is awesome, going to contribute later


----------



## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

^ bumping up an ancient thread now are we?

Seems like I pretty much dominated this one on frotteurism. It's not even an 18+ topic either.

I am way too attune with my sexuality, I swear.

Result of mental incapacitation among other things. Heh.


Topic should be moved to the other section so I can properly describe the fine act of a man thrusting into you on public transit *-*


----------



## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

mezzoforte said:


> 1.) I've masturbated several times while my roommate was in the room sleeping this year. And once let out a pretty audible moan lol.
> 
> 2.) And I shared this before but I masturbated in the backseat during a roadtrip with my family.
> 
> 3.) Cam sex? That doesn't seem very naughty though, since it's gotten more common.


Almost a year later and I still haven't beat these lol. This needs to change...:twisted


----------



## zomgz (Aug 17, 2009)

Reviving the naughty thread? How very naughty of you!


----------



## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

mezzoforte said:


> Almost a year later and I still haven't beat these lol. This needs to change...:twisted


That's nothing anyway. You're a nun.


----------



## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

This thread should be moved to the 18+ section, for funsies.


----------



## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

RelinquishedHell said:


> That's nothing anyway. You're a nun.


I know.  I'll have to get to work. :yes


----------



## Aribeth (Jan 14, 2012)

*gulp*


----------



## Istachrissta (Oct 1, 2014)

I road in a car drivin by a 14 and then went and stole two packs of smokes when I was just 15. I know I know I am just a rebel.


----------



## ghoskin (Jun 20, 2014)

Had drunken sex in a graveyard...those were the days


----------



## Salvador Dali (Oct 26, 2013)

I just realized I'm the one who created this thread, nearly a year ago too. I'm feeling kinda bad now...


----------



## 0blank0 (Sep 22, 2014)

Haha i can't say...or just don't know which one to chose from.


----------



## Amorphousanomaly (Jun 20, 2012)

Brothers at a party, while my boyfriend was in the other room. My sister's girlfriend's other girlfriend.


----------



## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

mezzoforte said:


> 1.) I've masturbated several times while my roommate was in the room sleeping this year. And once let out a pretty audible moan lol.
> 
> 2.) And I shared this before but I masturbated in the backseat during a roadtrip with my family.
> 
> 3.) Cam sex? That doesn't seem very naughty though, since it's gotten more common.


Wow. Just...wow. I see you've really earned the nickname "Fap Wizard" :b


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## TheHaxanCloak (Jul 26, 2014)

My GF gave me a BJ at the movie theater while my High School teacher was sitting 2 seats to my left. 

I could post like 20 more stories, but to basically sum it up: BJ's.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Can't say, but it was pretty naughty.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

TheHaxanCloak said:


> My GF gave me a BJ at the movie theater while my High School teacher was sitting 2 seats to my left.


:um

Was the teacher watching? Lol.

opcorn


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## drummerboy45 (Jul 29, 2010)

Orgy while skydiving.


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## TheHaxanCloak (Jul 26, 2014)

mezzoforte said:


> :um
> 
> Was the teacher watching? Lol.
> 
> opcorn


I didn't check to see if he was looking(maybe out of possible fear...of losing my libido, I mean)
In fact she managed to do it twice in a row, which I didnt even know was possible for me or 99.9% of men >_<

It wasn't in a subtle way, either, she was laying sideways across two seats and I had my hand down her pants. Maybe a hoodie was covering her actual face and _it_,though.

My ex GF did it also as my mom drove us home late at night(different occasion), right in the backseat. I think my mom saw me in the front mirror and laughed. I was like 16. Obviously I have a lot more tact now so that wouldn't happen, haha. Thicking back on things, my mom would see things happening all the time and laugh about it, like some sort of high-five gesture.

She also sat on me(err, it) in a public jacuzzi as a few of our friends were hanging out in it, and strangers. 
It's always funny telling my friends all of these stories after they happen, because they have no idea that any of this stuff was going on right in front of their eyes. Like, almost every weekend when we were all hanging out.
Probably 50 other similar stories like this.

As for actual "naughty" things not involving sex...
When I was a dumb angsty teenager, my brother drove me and our friends through a fast food joint late at night, ordered two drinks, knowing that when we got to the window, the dude would be handing us both drinks at the same time. I was in the backseat, and I had a squirt gun full of every ones urine(4 of us), and I squirt a massive stream of it right in the guys mouth, perfectly aimed shot, and he dropped both of the soda's in what felt like slow motion.

Then we drove off to the local orange grove, picked about 100 oranges, and drove around the whole city tossing them at car windows. We must have destroyed like 50 of them... 
To be young and dumb again =(


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## McFly (Jul 15, 2014)

TheHaxanCloak said:


> My GF gave me a BJ at the movie theater while my High School teacher was sitting 2 seats to my left.
> 
> I could post like 20 more stories, but to basically sum it up: BJ's.


The world needs more BJ stories.


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## Spritz11 (Jan 8, 2013)

Things involving my brothers best friend hahahaha


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

If we're talking public sex the only thing that comes to mind is having my crotch rubbed by a gal in class in grade 10. Everyone knew what she was doing except the teacher who was rambling about whatever & writing on the board the whole while. People found it quite scandalous at the time, lol.

If we're talking general nonsense then friends & I used to pour gasoline & other flammable things into garbage bins at night & set them ablaze and/or make them explode. It was highly entertaining while faded.

We also used to pick up old appliances from back alleys & then take them to this rather high bridge & toss them over so as to watch them disintegrate upon impact. Also, good fun at the time.

Finally, there's this stretch of freeway here that goes for a spell that we'd race at quite fast speeds down in two cars having water balloon fights. You can imagine a bunch of young idiots with their torsos halfway out the passenger windows speeding along tossing balloons back & forth at each other screaming & laughing about it all the while.

I suppose those tales are more stupid that naughty though


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## mjkittredge (Sep 8, 2012)

zomgz said:


> Reviving the naughty thread? How very naughty of you!


Oh, you have no idea, darling. But soon you will


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

orsomething said:


> had sex w my ex on a chaise longue under the blankets while his entire family was in the room while we were all watching some crap movie with them


That must have been some stealthy ****ing! :shock


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

Drank milk out of the carton.


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

orsomething said:


> spooning and moving slowly helps


Hmmm I see

*stares off into the distance in deep thought*


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## jim11 (May 23, 2011)

When I was a kid a took a hammer and swung it hard on my neighbour water pipe. The pipe burst and when my dad asked who did it, I told him it was my friend who did it.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

LolaViola said:


> I was on an Amtrak train once. This was a long train ride, like 6 hours long. This guy ended up sitting next to me. We talked for like an hour. We ended up kissing. It was kind of hot, but really weird for me.


You didn't get his number?


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## EndlessBlu (Mar 7, 2012)

So much lewdness in this thread. Why can't you all be pure and untouched by sexual temptation like me?


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## LolaViola (Jun 23, 2013)

mezzoforte said:


> You didn't get his number?


 I got some digits, yeah lol. From what I remember, he said he didn't have a cell phone. He gave me his house phone number. I called once and didn't reach him. I called again and somebody else answered the phone. I never tried again...I started getting anxious lol. He also gave me his e-mail address before he got off the train and we exchanged a few e-mails. That was all we shared...*stares off into the distance with a sigh*


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Nothing good...... maybe masturbating to the sound of my mom was having sex in the next room :stu.


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## gopherinferno (Apr 7, 2009)

edit: nah this story is too good for yall


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## truant (Jul 4, 2014)

gopherinferno said:


> edit: nah this story is too good for yall


Posting this tease was the naughtiest thing done in this thread.


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## gopherinferno (Apr 7, 2009)

truant said:


> Posting this tease was the naughtiest thing done in this thread.


it's one of my blog entries if you really want to know


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## truant (Jul 4, 2014)

gopherinferno said:


> it's one of my blog entries if you really want to know


I can't believe you did that in public. I wonder if they ever got the stain out?


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## Orbiter (Jul 8, 2015)

EndlessBlu said:


> So much lewdness in this thread. Why can't you all be pure and untouched by sexual temptation like me?


I know your comment is a year old but I can't resist:
Your location "in orbit", is just too awesome.
I'll write that too hahaha.


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## gopherinferno (Apr 7, 2009)

truant said:


> I can't believe you did that in public. I wonder if they ever got the stain out?


I doubt it. It was a pretty big mess. Terrible things happen when you don't have tissues.


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

Not sure if I ever actually answered the question in this thread. Ffs, I don't even know.


If you mean sexy-time naughty, I had sex with my ex-wife while the neighbor next door watched. I had phone sex about a year(?) ago, and I'm not even going to allude to who she was. That may not be a big deal to a lot of people but it was just really...weird to me. I had a difficult time at first getting into it but she got me off, so, so hard and she wasn't complaining, either. My ex-wife used to love to push me to have sex in public or semi-public places. I did it once, and just didn't feel right about doing it, so we never did it again. I messed around with my gf in my parents bed once, it was during a little get-together while they were out of town. I couldn't get the f-ers that were locked in my room to come out, so we had to get creative. There are a couple others that come to mind but this isn't the 18+ thread so....yeah.


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## SouthWest (Dec 4, 2014)

I had sex with my girlfriend outside a church against the wall in broad daylight. Not my finest moment to say the least.

There is more, but I'll save them for another time.


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## SD92 (Nov 9, 2013)

Either urinating into a cup, picking all the plums off a plum tree in summer when they were ready for picking and throwing them at a farm building, or putting the hose pipe through the letterbox and turning the tap on. All when I was a young child, say about 4-8. I could be a little **** at home but quiet and perfectly behaved in school.


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## 7th.Streeter (May 11, 2011)

I don't think I've done anything bad..... 


* rummages through memory *...


nope..


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Posted this on my dad's Facebook page on Christmas.


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## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

Hooked up with a girl while she was seeing my brother's best friend.


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## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

In college, my housemates and I would often steal crates of toilet paper rolls and hand soap bags from this one restroom on campus. For some reason, the janitor there would always leave it piled up on this one open shelf. Eventually we would find more people that would have class often to that building that would do this as well. This went on for the entirety of my time there. So we didn't have to buy any toilet paper and soap for the entirety of my college tenure. 

But given how the colleges there would jack up the tuition rates so much in a short period of time, I guess I didn't feel too bad.


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## Wizard Lizard (Aug 25, 2015)

I know it's too lewd, but I need to show it off.
I hope I don't get banned for posting porn.


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## Surly Wurly (May 9, 2015)

ive done a lot of really covert stuff but none of it will come out except in a setting where i am very happy with my female company and we are spooning and quietly talkin rubbish in bed


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## Fangirl96 (Apr 13, 2015)

idk what the naughtiest thing i've done is. I've stolen tea and biscuits from work, which could've ended badly if they found out. Hm...well i never pay to watch movies or listen to music if ya know what i mean. Wow i'm such a rebel i need to calm down with the craziness, lol


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## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

* Stole a cigarette from my mum's bag when she was asleep and tried to eat it when I was about three.
* Tried to shave my legs when I was four or five. Mum still says it's the worst thing I did.
* Threw sand at everyone's faces in kindergarten, trying to get it in their eyes.
* Scratched my name into some wooden picnic tables.
* Put things like curry, mustard and sweet chilli sauce in my sisters' cans of soft drink when they weren't looking.
* Put my hand in a tin of paint and left a handprint on the wall five years ago, when mum and dad were painting. It couldn't be sanded off, and you could still see it when it was painted over.
* Put a black tea label on a green tea bag and a peppermint tea bag so my dad would drink them thinking it was normal tea.
* When I was about 13, I put tiny pieces of bread in my 23 year old sister's slippers, bed and floor when she wasn't home, because she is scared of bread.
* Broke a mirror in a motel room, thinking it was a sliding door.
* Stood on a chair next to the fence and watched the little boys in their backyard next door until they moved away when I was five. When I was older, I felt bad because I thought that was why they moved.
* Ate my sister's last mint truffle when I was six. It was on her top bunk, where she thought it was safe. She's still not happy.
* We were on a boat when I was six, and I accidentally spilled my drink. It went all over my sister's jeans, making it look like she wet herself. She was 15, and didn't have another pair with her.
* Poured baby powder on my dad's alarm clock radio when I was five, which wrecked it.
* Took the last chocolate pudding/cake when I was ten and wrecked the microwave trying to heat it up. It almost caught fire, and it never worked again.
* Got bored waiting for my turn at a group swimming lesson when I was five or six, and left everyone else. My parents weren't happy, and I didn't go back after that. I went to a different place.
* Changed the channel on Mum and Dad's tv with an app when they were home and I was in New Zealand. Mum got scared, thinking it was our new dishwasher, or someone outside the house.
* Covered my sister's toilet bowl with Glad Wrap when she and her husband were away. She saw it, and it didn't work.
* My sister had the same perfume as me, but she had a bit more in her bottle, so I swapped them. 
* Last year, I put the time forward by two hours on every clock in the house, and my mum's netbook and phone. It didn't confuse anyone because I couldn't change the time on Foxtel.


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## lonerroom (May 16, 2015)

CrimsonTrigger said:


> Stole some candy from a store once. I was very young and it was just too easy.


I did too, I was 6 and I was at the super market and I snuck all the green gummy worms out of the plastic bin and eat them up because they tasted special. I prefer red gummy worms now.


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## Montee (Aug 8, 2015)

mezzoforte said:


> 1.) I've masturbated several times while my roommate was in the room sleeping this year. And once let out a pretty audible moan lol.
> 
> 2.) And I shared this before but I masturbated in the backseat during a roadtrip with my family.
> 
> ...


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## BelowtheCurrent (Mar 14, 2013)

My best friend and I sitting on this French guys lap drunk in a bar in Amsterdam simultaneously making out with him and then with each other while a group of people gawked. Eventually, we were both kicked out. We tried to get back in but the bouncer wasn't having it. We then found a way back in through a side door and continued to make out with each other inside about two feet from the bouncer and then we ran to the other end of the bar into the dancing crowd. 

There's much more of that, but I'll save it for another time.


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## Surly Wurly (May 9, 2015)

is it possible

to know for sure

if you really did need your bum examined by the dr

or if you were just lonely


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## Montee (Aug 8, 2015)

mezzoforte said:


> 1.) I've masturbated several times while my roommate was in the room sleeping this year. And once let out a pretty audible moan lol.
> 
> 2.) And I shared this before but I masturbated in the backseat during a roadtrip with my family.
> 
> ...


I was 100% sure those 3 things got written by a guy until I saw your avatar.


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## feels (Jun 18, 2010)

Banging at cemeteries used to be my thing. Sorta miss those days.


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## Nonsensical (Mar 29, 2013)

feels said:


> Banging at cemeteries used to be my thing. Sorta miss those days.


I have an idea for a first date now


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## markwalters2 (Mar 18, 2013)

Told my mum I would be back home by 6pm. Didn't.


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## mrazme (Sep 14, 2015)

Oral at the beach... at night though


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## Perspicacious (Jun 28, 2015)

Took a ride with a stranger past midnight to drive me back home. Things got quirky.


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## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

mutually masturbating with a girl in my geometry class in the front row. Could hear people giggling behind us lol.


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## RestlessNative (Jun 17, 2014)

Silent Memory said:


> * Stole a cigarette from my mum's bag when she was asleep and tried to eat it when I was about three.
> * Tried to shave my legs when I was four or five. Mum still says it's the worst thing I did.
> * Threw sand at everyone's faces in kindergarten, trying to get it in their eyes.
> * Scratched my name into some wooden picnic tables.
> ...


Lol I'm stayin away from you.


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## JustThisGuy (Mar 24, 2012)

- In my teen years I'd punch holes in the walls of my room.
- I'd steal cigarettes from my dad as a teen.
- I'd steal money from my parents as a teen. Dollar bills and change mostly, so as not to be noticed.
- My brother and I got into a fight, so I spit all over his pillows. He slept on them.
- Some pitbull came around and had cornered my cat on the porch. I kicked it in the face as hard as I could. I think I saw blood, like it bit its tongue. It yelped and ran away. Huge dog, what was I thinking? Just reacted.
- I, uh, got a boner in 6th grade and had lose shorts, so, of course, I was called to the front to check my grade. I couldn't hide the thing. Pretty sure lots saw.



Kevin001 said:


> Nothing good...... maybe masturbating to the sound of my mom was having sex in the next room :stu.


:surprise:Why o'why has no addressed this post yet?! Dude, what the hell?!



gopherinferno said:


> edit: nah this story is too good for yall


That'snot funny.



Silent Memory said:


> * Stole a cigarette from my mum's bag when she was asleep and tried to eat it when I was about three.
> * Tried to shave my legs when I was four or five. Mum still says it's the worst thing I did.
> * Threw sand at everyone's faces in kindergarten, trying to get it in their eyes.
> * Scratched my name into some wooden picnic tables.
> ...


You ate the cigarette?! I bellowed laughing, thinking you were gonna smoke it. Why is your sister afraid of bread?



RestlessNative said:


> Lol I'm stayin away from you.


Lol.


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## Oh Dae su (Nov 21, 2013)

I plan to make at least a couple friends here. I'd only be pushing people away :lol


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

JustThisGuy said:


> :surprise:Why o'why has no addressed this post yet?! Dude, what the hell?!


My sex drive/libido is sky high.......if I hear someone banging my body just starts reacting. Can't help it. I get turned on very easily.


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## JustThisGuy (Mar 24, 2012)

Kevin001 said:


> My sex drive/libido is sky high.......if I hear someone banging my body just starts reacting. Can't help it. I get turned on very easily.


But that's your mother. To sexualize her and use her for your own sexual gratification is demented. Not to be blunt, but there's no better way to put it.


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## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

JustThisGuy said:


> You ate the cigarette?! I bellowed laughing, thinking you were gonna smoke it. Why is your sister afraid of bread?


I ate some of it, and it was horrible. I didn't do it again after that.

She won't eat or touch bread, and she says it's because our parents used to try to make her eat fairy bread, which she didn't like. I used to follow her around the house with a loaf of bread.


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## TCNY (Dec 3, 2014)

i molested air


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## JustThisGuy (Mar 24, 2012)

Silent Memory said:


> I ate some of it, and it was horrible. I didn't do it again after that.
> 
> She won't eat or touch bread, and she says it's because our parents used to try to make her eat fairy bread, which she didn't like. I used to follow her around the house with a loaf of bread.


Haha! Big sister or...? I'm just picturing you running around, chasing her with bread. And it's too funny.


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## SmartCar (Nov 27, 2011)

JustThisGuy said:


> - In my teen years I'd punch holes in the walls of my room.
> - I'd steal cigarettes from my dad as a teen.
> - I'd steal money from my parents as a teen. Dollar bills and change mostly, so as not to be noticed.
> - My brother and I got into a fight, so I spit all over his pillows. He slept on them.
> ...


Wow you're a [email protected]$% in some ways, & Pitbull:surprise: I'd be f#%kn scared, then again.. I guess one takes on a different form in a fight or flight situation depending.


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## SmartCar (Nov 27, 2011)

I still feel weird sharing this:lol even though it was awhile back but uh.. I sorta mooned somebody on _Skype, _(_No one from the forums or anything_) Well, they wanted to see something, show I showed them


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## Sean07 (May 9, 2014)

Broke into an empty house when I was about 6 by kicking the back door in

Water ballooned one of my mums friends by accident

threw a load of rocks into a coy carp pond in my neighbours garden when I was about 5, killed them all. (didn't know there were fish in the pond until the neighbour came round and I was grounded for a week) 

Stabbed my brother in the foot with a fork during a fight

Threw all the coloured pens out the window at school into a bin 4 storeys below. Had to sit with my face towards the wall for the last 40 minutes of the lesson like in the victorian times. 

Other things too crude for general discussion


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

I've posted here before, and I've probably said this in other threads before, but I'll add:

I gave my brother two nosebleeds both of them were accidental actually, one time I was pretending to punch him but actually did, and the other time I was swinging on the stairs and he walked up and I accidentally kicked him in the face. but we'd sometimes fight deliberately as well. I hit him on the head a lot, I remember one time he bit me really hard and hit me with a bamboo cane and chucked this Sylvanian families table at my eye so I had a mark there for a while (this was also just before we had photographs taken at school so that's immortalised lol,) I kicked him hard in the back once and got in serious trouble with my dad. I've actually always been pretty close with my brother despite this 

I walked backwards up waterslides quite a lot, one time I chucked leaves down a water slide and also stuffed animals.


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## Polar (Dec 16, 2006)

Got a BJ at the cinema. It wasn't my idea, honestly.


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## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

-I stole Barbies from one of my friends when I was little. I also stole a few trinkets from houses I'd been in as a kid and thought nothing of it (ugh, I was klepto then)
-Stole stuff from the store years ago with my best friend including shoes, shirts, jewelry. We used to steal stuff from Claire's by putting it in our shopping bags. We were like, 12.. the prime age for stealing.
-When I was 5 or 6, I was mad at my brother for some reason and hid his shoe behind the big freezer in our house.... Then I felt guilty and un-hid it. I remember thinking it was the greatest comeback too. 
-For some reason, my bff and I thought it was a cool idea to leave broken glass on the walkway/or concrete, we were, 13 again, so I just straight up broke a glass of bottled grape juice on the ground, leaving a LOT of glass shards behind.
-Carved 'old granny' into one of my friend's old wooden table when her grandma was living there.. yeah was just mean.
-As a fully _mature_ adult, I stole a little cake from the Chinese buffet. Ok, maybe two cakes, in a napkin. I made sure no one was looking. I still feel guilty about that. So guilty. arrest me.


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## Findedeux (Mar 16, 2012)

Kicked the pregnant babysitter in the stomach....I was 7 or 8 though so I didn't go to jail.


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## burgerchuckie (May 31, 2012)

I once masturbated in a movie theater. That's it :lol


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## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Ate popcorns in highschool while sitting in the front row of the class
Used to upload my homeworks in highschool for my classmates to download and copy them(i uploaded them with dial-up. I was generous like that!)
Hacked into accounts of other subscribers of my ISP but didn't do anything*
Hacked into my university's website's content management system but didn't do anything*
* I'm not a hacker it's just their security was aweful.


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## 629753 (Apr 7, 2015)

Banged my best friends mom, stolen his girlfriend, cummed all over his sisters face, murdered his dad, had a tensome with highschool chealeaders, sodomized Moby, forced RIhanna sucked my penis and last but not least I CUT A CHICKENS DICK OFF.

Now please, let me calm my self...


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