# Why do you think you are single?



## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)

I'm wondering if so many people want a relationship, why aren't they in one?


----------



## FadeToOne (Jan 27, 2011)

I am too strange and different from everyone else and have not met a compatible opposite sex member, though I have looked - and I can't settle or change for anyone. 

Team forever alone representing.


----------



## MrQuiet76 (Aug 26, 2011)

to be honest, it's mainly because I haven't really even tried to date recently... back in college I was putting in some effort, but since then I just haven't even really been in a good situation to date, considering my lack of money and how busy I was with grad school.... of course, the anxiety I have around women I find attractive doesn't make things any easier... plus I'm just weird as ****


----------



## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

Because it's impossible to be attracted to me, and because I can't talk to people or get to know people. Outside repels, as well as the inside. Makes it hard.


----------



## Secretaz (Sep 10, 2011)

No one wants me and i don't want anyone.

I'm too socially retarded, awkward, nervous, quiet and weird. And i find most of people just annoying, i have nothing in common with anyone. So i think i'll be single forever.


----------



## cloister2 (Sep 2, 2011)

No job, no confidence, no nothing.


----------



## hydinthebasmnt (Aug 26, 2012)

Choice number one and two for me. I don't have the opportunity to meet new people even though I am surrounded by millions of them. Not that they would want me anyway.


----------



## Christian S (Aug 2, 2012)

Because I'm ugly, I'm poor, I'm not funny, I have SA and I'm just not accepted.


----------



## CWe (Mar 7, 2010)

All sorts of reasons that i have no energy to fill all you in on


----------



## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

I've stopped putting myself in situations where I can meet people and on top of that I'm very picky.


----------



## awkwardsilent (Jun 14, 2012)

I picked Ugly/Picky/Not Enough Guys in my area. At least everywhere I seem to go.. lol.


----------



## lkt95 (Feb 17, 2012)

I can't seem to speak to 'new' people, it's been getting worse through the past two years. I always put a shield or a barrier up whenever someone new wanders in and talks to my friends.


----------



## mesmerize (Oct 19, 2012)

im too picky, social anxiety.


----------



## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

Because I dont really need anybody,I am too self dependent.


----------



## shy_guy (Oct 11, 2009)

I'm too awkword and shy...most peopleare scared to talk to me because of this. its been almost 4 months since I've had any kind of contact with a female and its killing me! I haven't been this lonley in a long time =( there's this cute girl that just started working at my job But I'm way to nervous to talk to her.she realy shy so it makes it even more hopless ill ever get anywhere with her....


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I don't meet many people and I'm easily offended.


----------



## Evo (Jan 1, 2012)

I'm a pervert and ugly and sin.


----------



## Cyclonic (Oct 25, 2012)

No sense of humor, ugly (face and imperfect body), can't find a good job, paying large student loans leaving me with little to spend, and on top of all that I'm socially inept. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that I'm single really.


----------



## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

I guess SAD. It makes it hard for me to be relaxed around a guy I'm attracted to. I also go to an all-women's college where there are no guys in the student body.


----------



## talisman (Aug 5, 2005)

I dunno...women never give me feedback on why they ignore me or reject me.

I've been told by 'friends' that I'm too picky which is possibly true, but more due to feeling inferior to most women, not because I have lots of criteria to tick off.

A lot of women don't even get past looking at my photo on dating sites, so maybe I'm ugly. I recently put a few up on badoo and the average rating is below 5 out of 10.

A lack of single women in my life and SA obviously contribute to me being single.

Possibly being a bit too sexually open-minded and maybe pervy could have led to a few women avoiding me, but tbh I think I'm pretty tame compared to many guys and girls.

Who knows...I don't.


----------



## Freiheit (Dec 8, 2008)

A combination of SA, not getting out enough, too picky, and not really up for a relationship at this point in my life. I'm not even up for a casual thing or dating because I take my social interactions with other people to heart and quite seriously. Probably too seriously.


----------



## ShouNagatsuki (Oct 20, 2012)

Because I'm not interested in 3D/real people, and I'm thankful for it, because it seems like romance/sex is another big cause of frustration.


----------



## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

I'm just an average guy, who should be capable of meeting an average girl but my SA and me not putting myself in social situations to meet new people get in the way. All the girls I talk to on a regular basis at the moment in my life are already taken... 

Also I think I might possess an inferiority complex and suffer from self-shame. I consider myself to be ugly and I don't feel I fit in anywhere be it the Asian community or any for that matter.


----------



## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

I'm not a good looking rich man.


----------



## Mourn4UrSelf (Nov 2, 2012)

I'm ugly, too picky, too shy and not funny. Plus I'm gay, so my choices are very limited.


----------



## Invisiblehandicap (Jul 31, 2011)

Evo said:


> I'm a pervert and ugly and sin.


no you arent :squeeze


----------



## Soilwork (May 14, 2012)

Well I haven't really tried to put myself out there tbh. My SA holds me back, I'm too serious most of time and I'm not the greatest looking either.


----------



## ManOfFewWords (Mar 20, 2012)

SAD and I need to move out.


----------



## Guldove (Oct 17, 2012)

Plain. Not very feminine. Anxiety. Not willing to be someone's practice or placeholder.


----------



## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

Social anxiety!!!
I get way to nervous and panicky with girls and it seems almost impossible to make it work for long, but I keep trying anyway lol.

I am also poor as dirt :?


----------



## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

Because I have no social skills and don't know how to chat with girls. I'm also really picky. This is me on okcupid:

scroll...
scroll...
scroll...
scroll...
scroll...
scroll...
<<hmm, she could be interesting. Click. Nope. (no smokers, republicans , party girls, yada yada...)>>
scroll...
scroll...
scroll...
scroll...
scroll...
scroll...


----------



## cybernaut (Jul 30, 2010)

Social Anxiety/Social Awkwardness.


----------



## Mongoose (Oct 26, 2012)

"I'm a virgin" should've been one of the choices. I've been rejected because of that. Even if I were tall and handsome, I'd have the same problem.


----------



## little toaster (Jul 5, 2012)

I meet some girl who seems nice, but after talking to her an observing her behavior, I find things I don't like and I just want to keep walking away. After a while, I don't want to ask her out anymore.

But since people just assume what they see, they think I get too nervous when I try to ask her out. They actually don't know that I don't want to ask her out.


----------



## Invisiblehandicap (Jul 31, 2011)

Too picky. I don't consider it a bad thing though.


----------



## feverfew (Jan 11, 2012)

Well I picked too picky and social anxiety (the last one is kind of a duh on this forum right?)I'm also not too keen on my looks either, but I'm probably not ugly...

btw I love the crack at Two and a Half Men! It was actually funnier than the show :clap


----------



## Ricebunnyx3 (Sep 1, 2010)

1. I'm Hideous (Horrible facial features, acne, & scars)
2. I'm Fat
Males don't even approach me (even for friendship) because nobody wants to talk to someone as disgusting as I look.

And even if they did try to talk to me, it wouldn't end well. I wouldn't talk to them. I'd be too scared and just leave.


----------



## ShadyGFX (Jul 18, 2012)

Ugly, poor and social anxiety.


----------



## Jason 1 (Jul 26, 2012)

I must confess, I am selective; however, if I didn't have social anxiety, I would have the ability to become the man I want to be (confident, successful, cool) and; as a result, have the ability to earn the affection of the ladies my heart so desires.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Because I'm not terribly attractive but I'm only attracted to better than average looking guys. And I am not really attracted to the guys in SF so much. I need to move to Miami.


----------



## Earl of Lemongrab (May 15, 2012)

I wouldn't even know what to do in a relationship even if I had one, and I don't see the use of having one...


----------



## AndreAlcatraz (Nov 12, 2012)

Because in not "Cool" lol. 
Who cares, i have books and games. 

Actually i do care, because the 3 girls i liked traded me for some1 else.
And the last girl traded me for a guy whos way older , and i couldnt compete, even if i was dumb enough to do that.


----------



## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

2 Things I put, SA and not enough women in my area.

If anything I used to be the opposite to picky but hit a point in the past year where I realised I was going with women that were below standard and I would eventually get bored with them. So I should up my standards to finding a girl that I can really see myself suited to. 

SA plays the biggest part. In the past I found it easy to get women who are under my standards, I dont know why but if I didnt fancy them too much, I could easily get along with and get with... But the problem I have is when I meet a girl that I find to be exactly what im after... I become a nervous wreck and dont know what to say.

The thing with not enough women in my area is more about theres not enough ways to meet women in my area. Like ideal scenario would be going to a pub in the day during the week and there being a girl on her own who popped in for a few quiet drinks.... but of course that rarely happens


----------



## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

I don't go out of the house much
I don't fix myself up
People must think I am a lesbian because of the way how I act.
I'm also shy whenever it comes to boys


----------



## pbandjam (Sep 24, 2011)

My lack of self esteem, mediocre to below average looks, no friends, but most of all I just don't know how to meet people :'(


----------



## CK1708 (Mar 30, 2011)

_I'm a pervert_ :clap


----------



## OMGallthenamesaretaken (Nov 16, 2012)

I tend to joke around a lot when i'm around girls. I don't know how to have a serious conversation with them. Most girls think I'm immature for this reason even though they don't really know me.


----------



## northstar1991 (Oct 4, 2011)

I think the biggest reason I'm single is because I fear getting close to people and being myself around them. Social anxiety does not help at all.


----------



## mzmz (Feb 26, 2012)

*this makes me feel better*

i at least have a sense of humor, i'm not ugly, and um i can talk to people a little. But i'm super picky and have low self esteem and SA and love shyness, so yeah, single for life, baybee.

:um


----------



## Your dreaming WAKE UP (Feb 11, 2012)

Social anxiety. I'm just too anxious.. I hate it.


----------



## StayingMotivated (Sep 5, 2011)

I'm not outgoing enough :O thanks SA. but that can/will be fixed  I feel I have a lot to offer so it's really only the social thing thats getting in the way


----------



## flowersforsarah (Nov 1, 2012)

I'm single because I don't love myself, which I need to learn to do, before I stand a chance trying to coexist romantically beside anyone else. ~


----------



## Alas Babylon (Aug 28, 2012)

This thread is hilarious. 
Virtually everyone here calling themselves ugly are average at worst (and some of them are pretty damn attractive). And all the people talking about how unlikeable they are, are actually some of the most well liked people on SAS, like Barette and so on. 
I'm not having a go at anyone, I just think its darkly ironic that a lot of people are blissfully ignorant of what is actually good about themselves .


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Mongoose said:


> "I'm a virgin" should've been one of the choices. I've been rejected because of that. Even if I were tall and handsome, I'd have the same problem.


That is bullsh*t lol that wasn't the proper reason if you ask me...


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

I would say it's a combination of being a bit of a screw-up and a big ***** when it comes to responding to initial interest.


----------



## verizon999 (Jul 29, 2012)

I cant get dates or women because im extremely shy and hate myself, the only women i get are the ones who come at me consistently and are usually extremely outgoing and talk alot. And are very persistent and blunt with me. lol


----------



## AwkBoy (Jun 7, 2012)

My aloof, awkward, and somewhat shy personality assures that know female would waste their time with me, pretty much.


----------



## MNM (Oct 3, 2012)

cuz im ugly, bad at reading people, annoying and always find the wrong people


----------



## Droidsteel (Mar 22, 2012)

Because I never meet any girls lol. I haven't even had a conversation with one scince the summer. 

Basically its kind of impossible to even start getting to know a girl at the moment. Hopefully things will be different in uni but I might just be kidding myself (i said that about collage when I was in school).


----------



## Hello22 (Feb 10, 2010)

Lack of confidence in myself is really unattractive. Plus i'm a closed book, and i get too shy around guys i like.


----------



## madisonjane (Jun 18, 2012)

People don't seem to like me. I feel like I intimidate them sometimes.... (the anxiety face?)
And probably because nobody really knows who I am.
I rarely talk to people I don't know.
I don't even know how I have friends :?


----------



## vanishingpt (Mar 9, 2012)

Right now I'm pretty busy with school and some work. But honestly, probably just because I'm too shy to put myself out there and I take a while opening up to people so people are quick to brush me off I guess? I'm rather reserved... and I don't really flirt with people either LOL. It always makes me blush like mad.


----------



## Isolated18 (Jul 9, 2012)

Great question 
1) im unattractive
2) boring as hell
3) weird
4)stupid
5) lack confidence 
6) lack common sense
7)unable to hold a conversation
8)Social Anxiety


----------



## flowersforsarah (Nov 1, 2012)

Paradox Frog said:


> This thread is hilarious.
> Virtually everyone here calling themselves ugly are average at worst (and some of them are pretty damn attractive). And all the people talking about how unlikeable they are, are actually some of the most well liked people on SAS, like Barette and so on.
> I'm not having a go at anyone, I just think its darkly ironic that a lot of people are blissfully ignorant of what is actually good about themselves .


This is very true! :clap


----------



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

My problem is having a fascination with being someone's ultimate desire and trust me I wasn't that with my past two boyfriends!


----------



## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

Paradox Frog said:


> This thread is hilarious.
> Virtually everyone here calling themselves ugly are average at worst (and some of them are pretty damn attractive). *And all the people talking about how unlikeable they are, are actually some of the most well liked people on SAS, like Barette and so on. *
> I'm not having a go at anyone, I just think its darkly ironic that a lot of people are blissfully ignorant of what is actually good about themselves .


omg This made my day. I'm pretty positive that's a sign I'm waaaay too invested in this forum, but either way you've put me in a good mood.


----------



## Daisy1993 (Nov 18, 2012)

The idea of having a relationship with someone scares me because Im always afraid that he will hurt me


----------



## mzmz (Feb 26, 2012)

MNM said:


> cuz im ugly, bad at reading people, annoying and always find the wrong people





Hello22 said:


> Lack of confidence in myself is really unattractive. Plus i'm a closed book, and i get too shy around guys i like.


also i'm a wierdo


----------



## Moochie (Nov 11, 2012)

I am a little picky.. I mean I just don't go out with anyone. I have to get to know them first. Plus, I AM A WEIRDO!


----------



## DontDoSadness (Jan 12, 2011)

I have selective mutism around men, I've never really been asked out, and I go to an all girls school now and never see guys anymore like I used to at my old school.


----------



## TobeyJuarez (May 16, 2012)

no job, and im awkward... and i dont really meet new women that often


----------



## Zeppelin (Jan 23, 2012)

I'm a loner.


----------



## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

(1) Social anxiety

and 

(2) not enough women in my area. I mean, HELLO! I am THIRTY-SEVEN! Are there a lot of single people my age? Nope!


----------



## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

I want too much love.


----------



## SOME (Jul 13, 2009)

I have alexithymia and am very schizoid, social anxiety annd poor as dirt.

I literately can't comprehend or understand feelings or emotions I can only go so far. A girl can straight up tell me she likes me to my face and I won't know what emotions or feelings she's associating with me, nothing would go on with me I'd feel so lost and twisted like always and would say "ok" and walk off puzzled wondering wtf she's talking about. I can only think of words boyfriend and sex. She literately would have to hold my hand and help me understand in depth detail what she's feeling so I can understand what I'm feeling, she just can't say I like you and expect me to response like a normal person would and that's something a lot of girls would not put up with. 


I'm so ****ing weird! :lol


----------



## OutOfControlPanel (Jul 14, 2012)

n/a


----------



## Things Unsaid (Nov 26, 2012)

I think one of the main problems for me is a lack of exposure. The only girl into girls I know is a childhood friend, and since we're like sisters she's never even been on the radar. I barely socialize as it is because of my anxiety and the fact that I need to get my life in order, let alone in any LGBT community where I'd have better odds.

I also feel like part of the problem is just me. I live in a world where people seem to want fast relationships and early gratification, and I can't imagine moving at the speeds I see some people move at. Even when I'm not anxious with people, I take a long time to develop close relationships. I'm the kind of date a lot of women would just get tired of waiting for.

I don't think I'm horrible, but I'm not much to look at and I'm not exactly brilliant, well-off, or talented. I definitely fall below some people's standards.

Not to mention, I worry about getting older. I know there's a lot of women hoping to meet someone in their teens and twenties, but as I reach my thirties how many will still be looking? Without anxiety, they can go out and meet people as they please until they find someone to settle down with.


----------



## evginmubutu (Sep 12, 2011)

bad habits.


----------



## edhoo (Feb 15, 2011)

Easy, I'm way too picky.


----------



## sas111 (Oct 20, 2010)

Have no desire for it after a bad breakup.
I'm ugly & replacable.
My type is hard to come by, especially in this area.
Lost social skills, not likely to be regained.
I don't have anything to offer, I'm quite dull.
I plan on offing myself soon.
No one ammuses me or catches my interest.


----------



## River In The Mountain (Jun 6, 2011)

I find it impossible to feel comfortable with being comfortable.I don't think anybody would have the patience for me.


----------



## pastels (Sep 18, 2012)

insecure and dont put myself out there


----------



## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

There should be an option: "Too lazy/don't care to find anyone to date."


----------



## DontDoSadness (Jan 12, 2011)

pastels said:


> insecure and dont put myself out there


This too.


----------



## Marleywhite (Aug 24, 2012)

I dress like a prude and my anxiety around guys


----------



## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

I keep getting burned over and over again. And I'm just so tired of it. I'm starting to believe I'm not good enough. Anytime I start feeling comfortable or as if it is going somewhere, it all falls apart...just like recently. I've given up on the hope of finding someone.


----------



## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

You're only 22 years old. I'm 28...try freaking out then.



Things Unsaid said:


> I think one of the main problems for me is a lack of exposure. The only girl into girls I know is a childhood friend, and since we're like sisters she's never even been on the radar. I barely socialize as it is because of my anxiety and the fact that I need to get my life in order, let alone in any LGBT community where I'd have better odds.
> 
> I also feel like part of the problem is just me. I live in a world where people seem to want fast relationships and early gratification, and I can't imagine moving at the speeds I see some people move at. Even when I'm not anxious with people, I take a long time to develop close relationships. I'm the kind of date a lot of women would just get tired of waiting for.
> 
> ...


----------



## kursedlife (May 5, 2010)

Every woman I'm interested in has no interest in me.


----------



## SnowSunRainClouds (Dec 3, 2012)

I picked ugly as sin, poor as dirt (applied more the being single during high school/into my first year of uni because I went to a 'rich kids' school), and SA. 

I think that they all kind of play off of each other. While I don't actually think I'm ugly as sin, I know I don't take care of myself as well as I should. I'm over weight (close to obese), dress poorly, and have bad hair and skin (not horrible mind you, but not great). 

I mean my SA is that voice that tells me everyone thinks I'm ugly, so why bother trying to put on a mask that will make them stare more. I know deep down this isn't true, but I can't help but feel like this. My confidence is so low that I don't try with my appearance at all. A small part of me feels like because I don't have the money to go out and do things, and dress nicely, etc., then people wouldn't bother with me and I also have less of a chance meeting people. 

SA is kind of obvious. I try and hid my 'real' self away so that I don't grab more attention and so that I can avoid being open with people. 

Hopefully losing weight and clearing up my skin will help me desire to at least look semi-decent and talk to a few people (or at least try to).


----------



## Cam1 (Dec 4, 2011)

To put it simply: Social Anxiety.


----------



## sda (Oct 23, 2011)

Lots of reasons! The biggest of course is Social Anxiety. 

As for other reasons.. I won't say I am ugly, but I am not that good looking either, lack of social skills, no friends, picky, parents with archaic attitudes ,not putting myself out there, work (too busy etc) & my ethnicity!* 

*If anybody contests this notion, see OKCupid's research on reply patterns. The sad thing is even people my own ethnicity put males of their race last (evidence? OKcupid blog, my online dating experience & things overheard)


----------



## Loveless (Apr 6, 2012)

Ugly, I'm insecure, paranoid, no job, no car, no one likes what I like, my dwindling friend count, the fact I don't smoke or drink. I usually like girls I don't know, and that makes me creepy. I watch massive amounts of porn, so add in pervert as well. I'm also quiet around people, I act weird, at times I get taken advantage of. I sometimes am an attention *****. I also am just unlikable. So yeah a bunch of reasons.


----------



## AndreAlcatraz (Nov 12, 2012)

Because im a good guy, i would never betray her, i would only love her and give everything i had for her.
Thats why im alone.
Do what? Girls like bad Guys.


----------



## Shinichi (Dec 4, 2012)

Because I'm gross and have nothing to offer.


----------



## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

Because I'm not very attractive and I don't make any effort to improve myself.


----------



## Moment of Clarity (Nov 3, 2011)

SnowSunRainClouds said:


> I mean my SA is that voice that tells me everyone thinks I'm ugly, so why bother trying to put on a mask that will make them stare more. I know deep down this isn't true, but I can't help but feel like this. My confidence is so low that I don't try with my appearance at all. A small part of me feels like because I don't have the money to go out and do things, and dress nicely, etc., then people wouldn't bother with me and I also have less of a chance meeting people.
> 
> SA is kind of obvious. I try and hid my 'real' self away so that I don't grab more attention and so that I can avoid being open with people.


It doesn't sound like you have much self confidence. Many posts I read on this site come across that way. I don't really know what to say but I think that ultimately you can at least give yourself a chance by first realizing that you're valuable. This video is somewhat random however I think what I'm trying to get at (the self-confidence thing) is explained pretty well from 1:20-3min.


----------



## hydinthebasmnt (Aug 26, 2012)

Shinichi said:


> Because I'm gross and have nothing to offer.


Same here.


----------



## SnowSunRainClouds (Dec 3, 2012)

Moment of Clarity said:


> It doesn't sound like you have much self confidence. Many posts I read on this site come across that way. I don't really know what to say but I think that ultimately you can at least give yourself a chance by first realizing that you're valuable. This video is somewhat random however I think what I'm trying to get at (the self-confidence thing) is explained pretty well from 1:20-3min.


I do agree with the point that she's try to get across but I find it hard to have confidence because I don't... meet my standards? I'd say that on a scale of 0-100, my confidence is at a 10 max. I don't exactly surround myself with people that make me feel good. I suppose I can try that if I ever get around to making any good friends.

It's hard to explain really. But I was bullied for so long that it's hard to find worth in myself. I suppose I could say that I'm currently a work in progress.

Thanks for the video though.


----------



## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Okay, I have posted in this thread before, but I honestly will say this.

I believe I am single because of my anxiety, and because shyness is not attractive to women. Every time a girl has been interested in me, and I display my naturally shy self, her response is to run. 

The ones that are left, that I don't get shy around, typically are already in relationships. So they're "safe."

I wish I could meet a woman that I feel comfortable enough around to approach, that also isn't taken.


----------



## mzmz (Feb 26, 2012)

*GAH!*



AndreAlcatraz said:


> Because im a good guy, i would never betray her, i would only love her and give everything i had for her.
> Thats why im alone.
> Do what? Girls like bad Guys.


I hope your kidding. where do I start??

"give everything i had for her" is probably the most red of the red flags...Girls like bad guys i'll vote gets 2nd place.

Look up "what is misogyny" ...once you fix yourself, you can deal with your low self esteem, which is what the rest of us are pretty much at.

your welcome.:sus


----------



## tario (Dec 17, 2012)

Eh, does that have to be hatred of women? Quite the assumption there, but not my concern I guess.

Right now I am single because I have very little to offer on the economical standpoint, which won`t be better until around summertime - 2014. Not entirely happy about the place right now, so if I don`t really feel comfortable with that then I would probably lie to hide the fact. And I don`t wanna do that. No hurry though, just some few instances where I crave sexual interaction.


----------



## matt20 (Apr 22, 2010)

I don't put myself out there...I have a dating profile and all that, and even have received a few responses. But I always feel held back or don't know where to go from an initial contact. My hobbies/interests have been crippled for a while now..I don't even know what I would talk about. I follow the news, but not really latest movies/tv shows/songs/video games/books..you get the idea.


----------

