# How do I get women?



## rojers (Nov 4, 2009)

I've had terrible luck with women so far. I think this can be related to my less than average looks. I'm about 5"11 not short at all. I'm really fit and have abs and am pretty muscular. I do amateur boxing for a while so I have a great body , however my nose is crooked. I have crew cut hair. I try to keep myself clean and smelling nice everyday. I'm also indian and alot of the girls I'm trying to pick up are white since in my area there aren't many indians. Is that a factor?
Is there anything I can do to make myself more attractive?

I seem to be able to to talk to girls but when it comes to getting that push to getting a date I fail. So far the only girls I get success with talking to is the ones with bf's.

For example one girl I worked with at a call centre was facing away from me even though she was next to me. I know it was a bad sign but I went for it anyway. The girl seemed nice then I went back to work. So I ignored her for a bit while I was drawing and she started up some convos with me which I thought meant she was interested. Then we played some games liek tic tac toe to stop from being bored. Next day I see her I told her to come sit next to me and she went all the way as far as possible from me alone in a corner. Man wtf.

Also there's a french girl in my class that's been teasing me on my french and I tease her back on somethings too and we fool around alot and I tickled her and she responded positively to it. What should I do , I really don;t wanna ruin a chance liek this as this one's the best one yet but I haven't asked her out yet.


What do I have to do to get girls?


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## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

Girls don't care what you look like they same way guys care about women looks. Girls are more into a guys personality. 

Ask her out but don't make it pressure like a date. Tease her a little. Say "you should hang out with me if your cool enough". Play around and don't take it seriously. Joke, keep it jovial. No reason it has to turn into high pressure.


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## numero1 (Apr 7, 2009)

Add 3 to the circumference of the girls waist, divide by 5, add her shoe size, subtract the color of her hair, add her sense of humor. Whatever you get to the power of her height. This is the algorithm for getting girls. This is how I managed to keep my girlfriend ratio at 0. Hope it works out for you.


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## Patron on a ship of fools (Nov 17, 2009)

numero1 said:


> Add 3 to the circumference of the girls waist, divide by 5, add her shoe size, subtract the color of her hair, add her sense of humor. Whatever you get to the power of her height. This is the algorithm for getting girls. This is how I managed to keep my girlfriend ratio at 0. Hope it works out for you.


How do you assign a numerical value to the color of her hair and her sense of humor?


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## numero1 (Apr 7, 2009)

Patron on a ship of fools said:


> How do you assign a numerical value to the color of her hair and her sense of humor?


 Well there are separate algorithms for those too LOL


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## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

There's not any _one_ thing you can do, you just have to like who you are.

Not saying I've masterd this, but I'm working at it.


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## Exploding Walrus Backflip (Sep 17, 2009)

Whatever it is your doing, start doing the exact opposite. It worked for George in that one Seinfeld episode.


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

I'm Indian, I have muscle (but not a 6 pack like yours... for now), and I'm in the same position, man. It's rough out there, especially if you're not white and there aren't many women of your own race that you come into contact with. As much as many of us would hate to admit it, many women (whether unconsciously or consciously) screen out non-white people because of the constant social conditioning all of us have undergone (have you ever seen a movie in which there was a clear Indian heart-throb that wasn't from Bollywood? No, Slum Dog Millionaire doesn't count: that guy did NOT look good enough to be a heart-throb). But there are many women out there that might find us tolerable, if not preferable.

I think VanDamMan gave some good advice. I've noticed that one of the main things that women tell me they're attracted to is "confidence." Womens' online profiles on dating sites often state something like "I want a real man." What does that mean in terms we can understand? Confidence, I think, means that they want someone who is sure of their own high value as a potential mate. Usually, those guys that act like they're better than the women they're pursuing give the impression that they have confidence. And it makes sense that women would want them - if a man can convince that woman that they are more valuable than she is, she will see him as a "catch" and will be more responsive and perhaps actively pursue him. This is often done by innocuous teasing - not about something that they might be offended by, but something that would imply weakness in her - just as VanDamMan's suggestion "if you're cool enough" implies. When they say they want a "real man," I think that implies that they want someone to take the lead in guiding the relationship, usually by telling her what to do (rather than asking, as VanDamMan suggested) and giving clear signals about how she should feel in any given situation. Awkwardness in general could be bad, so giving her a firm direction might help keep her from feeling awkward. I once heard that we should treat them as our "bratty kid sisters," which may incorporate both of these ideas.

Of course, this is speculation based on what I've seen in bars, clubs, parties, coffee shops, or other places that people meet and get something going, and from guys I know that are successful with women. I'm not sure if this would apply to intelligent women, women with SA, or women that have a tendency to reflect on what they do and why.

In any case, I hope it works out for you. Keep the faith, brother!


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## matty (Nov 2, 2009)

Be yourself, yep, I know that doesnt help. But it works for me. 

I havent picked up in a bar or club because I dont see a meaningful relationship starting from there. I know it happens, but I go out drinking to have fun with mates or partner (if I have one) not to try to find a girl. I dont want to be just another guy which has hit on them that night. 

Also my experience. Dont try to find someone. When you arent looking is when something will happen. When you least expect it. Be happy being alone and enjoy yourself.


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

Gold chains man.

Gold. ****ing. Chains.


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## Neptunus (Oct 29, 2007)

^ More like "The Golden Rule." That, and be yourself. Women value sincerity...


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

I think that's what they were talking about in the bible. Moses' gold chain collection, which is rumoured to have reached Mr. T-like proportions at some point during the decades long trek through the desert.


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## Neptunus (Oct 29, 2007)

zookeeper said:


> I think that's what they were talking about in the bible. Moses' gold chain collection, which is rumoured to have reached Mr. T-like proportions at some point during the decades long trek through the desert.


^ The Bible... and many other religions and philosophies. link 

Mr. T rules, btw.


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

Neptunus said:


> ^ The Bible... and many other religions and philosophies. link
> 
> Mr. T rules, btw.


They don't canonize just anyone...








​


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## Neptunus (Oct 29, 2007)

:lol And he is indeed worthy... :nw

Okay, back OT. LOL!


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

zookeeper said:


> They don't canonize just anyone...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


That pic is worthy of becoming my new avatar, haha


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## secretlyshecries (Sep 10, 2009)

> As much as many of us would hate to admit it, many women (whether unconsciously or consciously) screen out non-white people because of the constant social conditioning all of us have undergone (have you ever seen a movie in which there was a clear Indian heart-throb that wasn't from Bollywood? No, Slum Dog Millionaire doesn't count: that guy did NOT look good enough to be a heart-throb). But there are many women out there that might find us tolerable, if not preferable.


I think you're overgeneralizing a bit. Just because things haven't worked out for you, or the OP, doesn't mean 'oh, most white girls must be racist.' How do you know you wouldn't have the same problem if you were white? Plenty of guys on this forum do. I don't think it's a race thing but then again, maybe you live in a racist area or something.


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## rojers (Nov 4, 2009)

you guys aren't very helpful:blank


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

rojers said:


> you guys aren't very helpful:blank


I think you should ask out the the playful French gal, seems like the next step to me. I don't have much advice beyond that but they say to strike while the iron is hot & waiting to long with a gal often saps any chance you have at all. You might start with lunches if your classes are in the morning, get her to join you at the coffee shop & then maybe after that a couple times some evening meetings. That's a gradual plan of action otherwise if you're feeling confident then ask her outright to Saturday night date


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## DitzyDreamer (Jun 10, 2008)

secretlyshecries said:


> I think you're overgeneralizing a bit. Just because things haven't worked out for you, or the OP, doesn't mean 'oh, most white girls must be racist.' How do you know you wouldn't have the same problem if you were white? Plenty of guys on this forum do. I don't think it's a race thing but then again, maybe you live in a racist area or something.


Exactly, and statistically speaking, white women date outside their ethnicity at higher rates than most groups of women (with the exception of Asian women). I have found white women to be far more open-minded than black/non-Asian woman when it comes to interracial dating. And I'm a black woman in an interracial relationship...so that should say something.

I, personally, have had two REALLY bad instances with two Indian men. Does this mean I won't open myself up to dating Indian men despite these bad experiences? Do these two particular Indian men represent the majority? No.


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

secretlyshecries said:


> I think you're overgeneralizing a bit. Just because things haven't worked out for you, or the OP, doesn't mean 'oh, most white girls must be racist.' How do you know you wouldn't have the same problem if you were white? Plenty of guys on this forum do. I don't think it's a race thing but then again, maybe you live in a racist area or something.





DitzyDreamer said:


> Exactly, and statistically speaking, white women date outside their ethnicity at higher rates than most groups of women (with the exception of Asian women). I have found white women to be far more open-minded than black/non-Asian woman when it comes to interracial dating. And I'm a black woman in an interracial relationship...so that should say something.
> 
> I, personally, have had two REALLY bad instances with two Indian men. Does this mean I won't open myself up to dating Indian men despite these bad experiences? Do these two particular Indian men represent the majority? No.


I didn't say that "most" women do consciously discriminate, I said "many" women do. I also didn't mention anything about white women (I like women of all races, and most of the women I tend to meet are Asian or white). Neither did I call anyone "racist" for preferring one race to another when it comes to dating. I think it's impossible to deny that here in the States, there is a predilection for white men in the dating world, influenced by popular images in the media. Likewise, there is a predilection for giving higher salaries to men in general in the business world. Likewise, popular images of black people were horribly stigmatized in popular media not too long ago, which have given many people the impression that black people should be distrusted. Of course, with 9/11 and other terrorist actions, anyone who is brown and of the east gets stigmatized in the media a la 24. It's not anything that anyone is really proud of; even many of the people who prefer based on race are not proud of it. It just is.

Example: I went to an old friends birthday party at a bowling alley. There were 5couples there and 2 single guys. Of those couples, there was one white man-white woman couple, one Latino man-Latina woman couple, and 3 white man-Asian woman couples. The two single guys were an Asian guy, and me an Indian guy. Granted, this is just one example, and we can't really generalize based on this one experience, so I did a quick bit of research on the Census Bureau:

http://www.census.gov/population/www/cen2000/briefs/phc-t19/tables/tab01.pdf

Now, it seems that black women marry fewer white men than white women marry black men (79k vs. 209k), but if you look at other races, there appears to be a clear predilection for white men, which is especially dramatic in Asian couples. There were 380k Asian woman-white men couples, but only 124k Asian men-white women couples.

Also see: http://www.isteve.com/2003_census_interracial_marriage_gender_gap.htm

"Like most guys, Asian-American men are fairly reticent about admitting any frustrations in the mating game. But the news for them was even worse. Asian women had white husbands 3.08 times more often than Asian men had white wives. That means 75 percent of white-Asian couples featured a white husband and Asian wife."

Now I'm not sure if we can include Indian with "Asian men" in the above or with "other race." In any case, there appears to be a stigma about Asian men (not so much Indian men) as far as popular stereotypes concerning <manhood> go. Of course, I've had to hear my Chinese male friends complain about this disparity, so I've been a bit indoctrinated; you can draw your own conclusions.

It occurs to me that I've got a lot of work to do that I've been ignoring for too long, but this rant was rather cathartic. So I'll close with this: I'm sorry for the long email, and I'm sorry that you, DitzyDreamer, have had bad experiences with Indian men (I know some Indian guys that are real jerks to their girlfriends, even within my own family!) and I understand that you don't just go for white guys. But you don't necessarily describe the trend. I understand that black women have it pretty hard too, and if it's any consolation, I think black women can be pretty hot.


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## delirium (Jun 24, 2009)

Club 'em and drag 'em to yer cave!


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## DitzyDreamer (Jun 10, 2008)

STKinTHEmud said:


> I didn't say that "most" women do consciously discriminate, I said "many" women do. I also didn't mention anything about white women (I like women of all races, and most of the women I tend to meet are Asian or white).


Okay. I jthought you were just talking about white women because that is the group you were approaching. My mistake.



> Neither did I call anyone "racist" for preferring one race to another when it comes to dating. I think it's impossible to deny that here in the States, there is a predilection for white men in the dating world, influenced by popular images in the media.


True, but I've noticed this occurs mostly in Asian circles. In fact, I tend to EXPECT that when an Asian girl has a bf, the bf is usually white. In any other community, there wouldn't be a preference for white men. In fact, in the black and sometimes hispanic/Native American communities, dating a white guy would be a BIG no-no.



> Likewise, there is a predilection for giving higher salaries to men in general in the business world. Likewise, popular images of black people were horribly stigmatized in popular media not too long ago, which have given many people the impression that black people should be distrusted. Of course, with 9/11 and other terrorist actions, anyone who is brown and of the east gets stigmatized in the media a la 24. It's not anything that anyone is really proud of; even many of the people who prefer based on race are not proud of it. It just is.


I agree.



> Example: I went to an old friends birthday party at a bowling alley. There were 5couples there and 2 single guys. Of those couples, there was one white man-white woman couple, one Latino man-Latina woman couple, and 3 white man-Asian woman couples. The two single guys were an Asian guy, and me an Indian guy. Granted, this is just one example, and we can't really generalize based on this one experience, so I did a quick bit of research on the Census Bureau:
> 
> http://www.census.gov/population/www/cen2000/briefs/phc-t19/tables/tab01.pdf


That's peculiar. But think about it this way: everyone has to compete in the dating game, and the survival of the fittest wins. I doubt a poor, uneducated white guy would outdo a well-off (not necessarily rich), educated Asian man in the dating world, but if that particular white guy has 'better game' and is more outgoing than the Asian man, he'll do better off. It has more to do with approach than race.



> Now, it seems that black women marry fewer white men than white women marry black men (79k vs. 209k), but if you look at other races, there appears to be a clear predilection for white men, which is especially dramatic in Asian couples. There were 380k Asian woman-white men couples, but only 124k Asian men-white women couples.


But that is still alot of Asian men with white women, considering that Asians (well here in the US) constitute only 5 or so percent of the population.



> Also see: http://www.isteve.com/2003_census_interracial_marriage_gender_gap.htm
> 
> "Like most guys, Asian-American men are fairly reticent about admitting any frustrations in the mating game. But the news for them was even worse. Asian women had white husbands 3.08 times more often than Asian men had white wives. That means 75 percent of white-Asian couples featured a white husband and Asian wife."


Maybe Asian men are reluctant to even approach a white woman???



> Now I'm not sure if we can include Indian with "Asian men" in the above or with "other race." In any case, there appears to be a stigma about Asian men (not so much Indian men) as far as popular stereotypes concerning <manhood> go. Of course, I've had to hear my Chinese male friends complain about this disparity, so I've been a bit indoctrinated; you can draw your own conclusions.


Yeah, I'm aware of the stereotypes too. Unfortunately, in my every day life, I have never met an Asian that didn't fit the stereotype at all (good at math/science, into video games, shy, etc).



> It occurs to me that I've got a lot of work to do that I've been ignoring for too long, but this rant was rather cathartic. So I'll close with this: I'm sorry for the long email, and I'm sorry that you, DitzyDreamer, have had bad experiences with Indian men (I know some Indian guys that are real jerks to their girlfriends, even within my own family!)


I wasn't even their girlfriend. One was a pedophile who sexually harrassed me at the mall. The other one...well it's a bit complicated.



> and I understand that you don't just go for white guys. But you don't necessarily describe the trend. I understand that black women have it pretty hard too, and if it's any consolation, I think black women can be pretty hot.


And guess what? Even this black woman, supposedly the bottom of the barrel in [dating] society, found someone (or rather, that someone found me). I'm sure you are not worse off than I was/am, so I'm sure you can and will find someone.


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

DitzyDreamer said:


> And guess what? Even this black woman, supposedly the bottom of the barrel in [dating] society, found someone (or rather, that someone found me). I'm sure you are not worse off than I was/am, so I'm sure you can and will find someone.


Thanks for the encouragement! And I'm glad you found someone.


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

delirium said:


> Club 'em and drag 'em to yer cave!


I agree. If the gold chains won't dazzle them into submission, it's time to bust out the club (or the chloroform if you're feeling subtle).


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## Hippo (May 10, 2009)

I've done online dating. I usually get one positive response out of 20, so its a numbers game for me.


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## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

I think beauty is in the eye of the beholder. One girl may see you as cute and another may not. It doesn't mean every girl on the planet will dismiss you. Sometimes it's the buffest guys that we are most intimidated by. 

Just cause a girl flirts with you it doesn't mean she likes you, likes you she may just flirt with everyone that way. 

I'm not sure how old you are, but maybe, ask her if she wants to go for a drink after work sometime. If she says no she's probably not interested.


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## Milco (Dec 12, 2009)

I really don't like the whole dating game. I just can't figure it out.
It's true that different people view others differently - I know I'm attracted to things about girls that most other guys I've met don't seem to notice too much, but there do seem to be some patterns, I think.

I've been interested in an ok number of girls, and I try to do something about it as much as I can. Try to get the courage for it. But quite often I'm told they see me as a great friend they don't want to lose, but aren't interested in more. This is probably to do with my lack of confidence, but it is something I find it hard to get around.
I think it's true girls generally go more for personality than guys do, but that doesn't always make it 'easier', eventhough I think I have a great personality


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## sherrycoke (Dec 13, 2009)

Well.. for one.. alot of girls like tall men with dark hair and eyes. No matter what colour/race
If you dont want to loose her as a friend built your friendship a bit more maybe? Its worth it getting to know her better anyways. Start getting comfortable around her without thinking of the dating part? Give her alot of attention and be kind to her and compliment. I think many woman (like me) get freaked out if a person is too quick with things. Feel overwhelmed? Depends on the situation I guess. I dont know. Thats just my opinion.


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## Spettro (Sep 25, 2009)

delirium said:


> Club 'em and drag 'em to yer cave!


Relationships must have been so much easier for cave men :b


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## Elad (Dec 6, 2009)

rojers said:


> What do I have to do to get girls?


You need $$$


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## rickthegreat (Dec 22, 2008)

zookeeper said:


> Gold chains man.
> 
> Gold. ****ing. Chains.


ROFL.

Damn I came for an update. Did you ask her dude?


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## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

Unfortunately, race does affect people's success in the dating world. From OkCupid: http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/2009/10/05/your-race-affects-whether-people-write-you-back/

But on a positive note, there _are_ women like me around. I'm a white woman who finds Indian men attractive, and not just flashy Bollywood dudes with waxed chests (in fact, I will pass on the waxed chests. 70s-era Amitabh Bachchan FTW).

Anyway, good luck to you.


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## matty (Nov 2, 2009)

Hippo said:


> I've done online dating. I usually get one positive response out of 20, so its a numbers game for me.


So That means 19 girls are missing out


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## strawberryjulius (Jun 28, 2009)

delirium said:


> Club 'em and drag 'em to yer cave!


My boyfriend drags me by my hair so it must work.


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

pita said:


> Unfortunately, race does affect people's success in the dating world. From OkCupid: http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/2009/10/05/your-race-affects-whether-people-write-you-back/
> 
> But on a positive note, there _are_ women like me around. I'm a white woman who finds Indian men attractive, and not just flashy Bollywood dudes with waxed chests (in fact, I will pass on the waxed chests. 70s-era Amitabh Bachchan FTW).
> 
> Anyway, good luck to you.


Thanks for the link, pita. Interesting (if depressing) stuff. I'm really surprised that Indian women respond to men of their own race LESS than any other race (and they're the only race that does this). I guess the conservative I-only-date-guys-that-my-parents-might-make-me-have-an-arranged-marriage-with girls don't use OkCupid. And Indian males receive less responses on the whole than any other race. I think I'll go ahead and sent a few messages to black girls.


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## fern (Nov 16, 2008)

zookeeper said:


> I agree. If the gold chains won't dazzle them into submission, it's time to bust out the club (or the chloroform if you're feeling subtle).


:rofl This is too funny. I've always wondered why so many guys wear those huge gold chains.

Also, there are lots of good looking indian guys. That Sanjay Gupta on CNN is pretty hot, except for the fact that he's always talking about gross medical things every time he's on tv.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

it's true, moses was well known for his dating status. what they don't tell you is that the other side of those stone tablets were covered with hash marks, which he used to keep count of his conquests.

go with matty's advice. 

one of my boyfriends was 5'6", going bald at the age of 26, and overweight, but i was crazy about him at the time due to his sense of humor.


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

CrashMedicate said:


> Words of truth. Print it and frame it.


I don't think the wait-and-see attitude is very productive. There are socially anxious men out there who go for a long time (if not all their lives) without a single relationship. To say that we should go about our everyday lives without doing anything about it will most likely invite more loneliness. Our default mode as guys with SA is to sit in our caves sulking, which in itself isn't very useful on the girlfriend front. Love might not find us, especially since the few women that actually do make the first move tend to get turned off by our nervousness. It's best to try and do something about it.


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## matty (Nov 2, 2009)

Well, I am not saying sit in a cave and sulk. How will a girl see you there. At some point you will need to interact with people to find a partner.


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

What I'm saying is that it's not enough to even go out and wait to be noticed. We probably actually have to make a move. And we can't really do that with a wait-and-see attitude. So, we have to do whatever we can to work on SA to the point that we can actually make a move.


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## nothing to fear (Mar 23, 2005)

STKinTHEmud said:


> What I'm saying is that it's not enough to even go out and wait to be noticed. We probably actually have to make a move. And we can't really do that with a wait-and-see attitude. So, we have to do whatever we can to work on SA to the point that we can actually make a move.


it's true, though i partly agree with matty, that is if you do regularly meet people and don't let your SA hold you back.
i just think people should be more relaxed about it and not always feel they have to need a women and constantly seek them out and make that their only goal (same goes for women of course). i think it just sets you up for a bit of disappointment when you find that not all of them are interested in you. it's just bad to put too much of yourself into it, it seems better to just 'go with the flow'. don't feel so bad if it doesn't work out with all of them, i would assume you can still enjoy their company if it's just platonic. (i might not be explaining this as well as i'd like...)

to the OP, appearance only goes so far so i think it can be a waste of energy if you focus and depend on that so much. IMO it's much better to work on being open and not feeling afraid to letting your personality and true self show.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

You have to make a move. Why? Because if you don't your chances of meeting someone are 80% slimmer. Combine that with having social phobia and that your a guy, your chances may be even lower. Make a move. Then just focus on trying to build comfort and trust with them, but even that is hard at times. Your best chances are to KEEP TRYING and always go after the things you want. I've found out after years of not doing ANYTHING, I am regretful and surprised how difficult it is EVEN after you feel confident about certain things. For some, sure, it is easier but I think meeting women, dating and getting to know them are some of the most difficult challenges I have yet faced. It seems like a tricky business full of risks and hurt, but by giving it all you got and learning from it is all you can ask to do. Go do something about it…


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

CrashMedicate said:


> Well of course you'll eventually have to make a move. But wait until you find someone who is worth it. Don't stress so much over it and don't try to pursue every girl you meet as a possible mate is all I'm saying. Be patient and be thankful for the fact that you're single. You can be your own man, do what you want, and not have to answer or explain yourself to anybody. Glass half full.


I want to agree with the idea that we should wait for someone who is worth it, but I've read that shy guys tend to have unreasonable standards when it comes to women. "Ms. Right" may not exist, and if she does, it might not be reasonable for guys like us to have a relationship with her.

We can try to stay positive, but it's hard to enjoy our lives and be content when we feel that we need woman so much and when we see constant reminders of how lonely we are. Sometimes, when we try to "hang in there" we find that we're hanging by a noose.

The best way to overcome is to try to make something happen, and if that doesn't work, try with someone else, even with women we may not find are that great a match for us. In the course of things, we may find that she really is the woman of our dreams.


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## vicente (Nov 10, 2003)

STKinTHEmud said:


> I want to agree with the idea that we should wait for someone who is worth it, but I've read that shy guys tend to have unreasonable standards when it comes to women. "Ms. Right" may not exist, and if she does, it might not be reasonable for guys like us to have a relationship with her.


I'm not sure about that. I'll date women who I'm not attracted to, but no one's attracted to me anyway due to my lack of confidence/ shyness, and possibly for having the wrong skin color and height. (Women may not care about looks as much as men, but these two factors are really important, and that OKCupid survey is evidence) Sometimes I wish I was an Asian or White woman, or a White or Black man.


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## matty (Nov 2, 2009)

Cerberus said:


> club her over the head and drag her back to the cave
> 
> Translation:
> 
> Win her over with your great personality and give her gifts, and drive her to your cave . . err. . house.


 Well said, times have changed, just have to get with the times


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## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

matty said:


> Well said, times have changed, just have to get with the times


Yeah, I hear those new carbon fibre clubs give you much more control.


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## Neptunus (Oct 29, 2007)

fern said:


> :rofl This is too funny. I've always wondered why so many guys wear those huge gold chains.
> 
> Also, there are lots of good looking indian guys. That Sanjay Gupta on CNN is pretty hot, except for the fact that he's always talking about gross medical things every time he's on tv.


I find Indian men to be very attractive. I've even dated one. It didn't work out because he was all hands from the start! Ironically, one of the first things he did was offer to read my palm! :lol


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## paradox002 (Oct 13, 2009)

watch the movie "hitch" and probably more than one time so you understand everything. Good luck


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## Willow Leaves (Dec 14, 2009)

Unless you're talking about one night stands at the bar, I think the question "What do I have to do to get girls?" is part of what's wrong with your line of thinking. Instead of going out there with the intention of "getting girls", find the one that you like and seem to be compatible with first, and then make your approach in a personalized way that's suited toward her as an individual - everyone's different, learn who she is and go from there.


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## asdf (Jan 19, 2008)

rojers said:


> For example one girl I worked with at a call centre was facing away from me even though she was next to me. I know it was a bad sign but I went for it anyway. The girl seemed nice then I went back to work. So I ignored her for a bit while I was drawing and she started up some convos with me which I thought meant she was interested. Then we played some games liek tic tac toe to stop from being bored. Next day I see her I told her to come sit next to me and she went all the way as far as possible from me alone in a corner. Man wtf.


yeah wtf


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## fluidglide (Mar 1, 2009)

*reply*

some posters like STKinTHEmud need to get some therapy or find some way to work out their issues.

to the poster, i can only say that the problem is actually you. look inside you and figure out what is making you feel this way.

around the world, their are millions, if not billions of guys who are going through the same thing you are. they are lonely, sexually frustrated, angry, and maybe even slightly resentful.

i forgot where i read this but it was stated on the number of sex partners a guy has in correlation to the country his is from, india and china was ranked 1st and 2nd in the lowest of numbers.

http://bigmacky.wordpress.com/2007/07/04/number-of-sex-partners/

then take into consideration the fact of selective infanticide which means that the guy: girl ratio in india and china is so lopsided, and you should realize this.

you could be in a LOT worse state if you were living in india. there are prostitutes that live in the big cities who have severals stds and they will still be getting top many male customers all still willing.

be glad you are living in a country which is actually quite liberal and open minded about sex. you are not in iran or saudi arabia.

and try to take the factor of race out of your head.

this issue of race seems to be a big issues for guys because we are just too fixated and concerned about looks. you may have a slight disadvantage to a white guy if everything else was even but that is never the case. a strong personality and great sense of humor will easily over compensate for any issues.

from your posts, it does seem like you are sort of limiting yourself to specific races for the girls you are interested in.

if the numbers from articles i have seen are accurate, i would assume that there are plenty of single black females who would have not problems finding you attractive. and don't give me the stupid excuse that you live in some small town which is predominantly white because that is almost never the case anymore.


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## SOME (Jul 13, 2009)

delirium said:


> Club 'em and drag 'em to yer cave!


So the "club" nowadays would be the alcohol? If the meida has thought me anything is that you meet girls in *clubs* like bars en stuff? And in the bar you serve the girl alcohol which makes her drunk almost like hiting her over the head with a club.:con Right?

I don't like it one bit.


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## sublimit (Aug 16, 2009)

Do people actually meet people in bars/clubs though? As in, is it common? I've never met anyone that way. :blank


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

sublimit said:


> Do people actually meet people in bars/clubs though? As in, is it common? I've never met anyone that way. :blank


I think anywhere and everywhere should be game. I wouldn't confine yourself to just one method.


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

To fluidglide: I'm already in therapy and have been for the past few months. I've made excellent progress, I think. But I want to point out that this is not the first time you've been insulting in your posts, that you've placed the blame squarely on the poster, someone whose social anxiety itself is not his fault so long as he's working to overcome it. I think therapy is very helpful in overcoming depression, anger, and SA in general, and so perhaps you should look into it as well.


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