# I have zero friends as a senior in college



## guyincollege (Sep 3, 2014)

I'm not even sure if I have anxiety to be honest, but I feel like I can relate to some of the social challenges the people on this thread talk about. 

When I started as a freshman in college, I hung out with one girl the majority of the time. I mustered up the courage to ask her out, and she said yes. (I can't help but feel I just got "lucky". Looking back I don't think I was much of a catch, but I was the one guy that was always around her so she was just really comfortable with me). 

I ended up spending the next 1 and a half years with her. We hung out almost every day. I didn't get to make many friends my freshman year because of the amount of time we spent together. 

When we broke up, I was starting my junior year in college. I didn't have anyone to talk to my first semester of my junior year. It's hard to make friends when it seems like everyone in your peer group already has their own little group figured out. 

I took the second semester of college off - I had really poor grades, wasn't interested in school, and was interested in getting some more work experience to figure out exactly what I wanted to do. 

So now, I'm starting my senior year of college (well.. technically junior year because I'll have to take an extra year to compensate for taking time off), and I still don't have a close group of friends I could talk to on any given day. I walk down campus with tons of people surrounding me, but I still feel lonely. I'm naturally introverted, so it feels nice to be alone, but not when I don't have a consistent group of friends to talk to. 

The thing is, I feel like I've done really well in almost all other facets of student life - I have incredible work experience, a great resume, tons of professional connections - but I can't seem to be able to make friends with people who aren't out focusing on making new friends themselves. I can make friends easily when I'm in a group where no one knows each other, but I struggle really hard when everyone already has their own group. It's like the words won't even come out of my mouth when I try to speak to them. 

Any students out there who have been through something similar? How did you get through it?


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## Blight (Jul 9, 2013)

I am in a similar situation, kind of. Except I'm a sophomore.

I made one friend last semester, a guy that i hung out with a lot and eventually started dating. But we broke up a couple weeks ago and even though he'll still hang out with me, I know he doesn't like being around me anymore.

So it's the start of my sophomore year and I don't have any friends. 

My methods of making friends have all centered around clubs and organizations. A little bit of talking to my neighbors in class, but i seem to sit next to a different person every time so that's been fruitless. I've especially been looking into christian groups, since they're so friendly if you show even the slightest inclination towards their faith. I've been attending a couple groups each week.

I guess I can't really tell you how to get through it, since I haven't even managed that myself. But I can empathize.


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## cucumber (Mar 8, 2014)

I'm in my third year of med school and although I do have some friends I really wish I had a group of friends instead. It's gotten better this year though. 

Like you said even I'm an introvert and like my time alone yet I need a group of friends, atleast in college hours. 

I totally relate to what you said about finding it easy to make friends in a group where no one knows each other but it becomes infinitely harder when it comes to breaking into an established group. 
I sometimes feel like I missed the bus, like I should have made the right friends in the first year and been in a group of my own.. But, oh well

Since I'm sort of in a similar position all I can say dont stop trying, be approachable, strike up conversations whenever you get an opportunity.
You don't have to approach an entire group at once, a one on one approach is generally far more effective for people with anxiety. We naturally work much better with lesser crowd. Don't worry, if you're persistent enough and don't lose confidence you'll probably work yourself into a group you'd feel part of n can relate to.

And the usual.. If you're good at or interested in something,play a sport or join a club.

It'll take time though so don't lose your confidence before you see some results.


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## Raeden (Feb 8, 2013)

I'm in the same position. I'm in my fourth year of college and nobody knows my name.


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## Chukopin (Oct 24, 2013)

I know a lot of people hate group projects, but if it wasn't for those I wouldn't know anyone's name. Somehow everyone avoids me, but after they know me a little, they don't mind talking to me. fml


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## queenbanana (Sep 5, 2012)

I have acquaintances, but no friends. Someone actually asked me if i was mute once, fml. 
And yeah, the few I know are through team projects but I'd still have worked on my own. I do feel a bit lonely sometimes when i see people around me all in close groups but thankfully my university is quite large and the majority of the people are lone commuter wolfs like me. It just kind of sucks a little bit that I'm graduating this year and I haven't made a single close friend. 

You know, oftentimes you think people don't know you exist, but there are a few that are always quite aware- especially other ones with no friends. There was this guy that approached me recently to ask if I wanted to work with him on a project- which I'd planned to do alone- and after that I noticed he was in all my classes, lol


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## cybernaut (Jul 30, 2010)

Lol, let's just finish this last year and then get the hell up out of here bro. I'm flying solo, myself.


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## spititout (Sep 7, 2014)

i have 2. join the club!!


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## Arkiasis (Jun 29, 2013)

2nd year and have made a total of 0 friends.


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## nevernotanxious (Dec 19, 2012)

Same situation here..should be graduating this year but since i transferred and changed majors, i have an extra year. I have become best friends with my roommate (got lucky there) and our other roommate hangs out with us frequently (although she's extremely annoying but it's somebody to talk to right??) but that's all the friends I've made. I talk to people in my classes sometimes but I don't know how to ask them to hang out outside of class w/out sounding weird. I joined a club last year, but found that it was too stressful for my anxiety and all the people in it just annoyed me for some reason. I don't know, sometimes I feel it's hard to relate to others. But I just joined the school newspaper and another club, so we'll see how that goes. I'm thinking of joining another one, but that one's a big commitment, so I'm not sure I'm ready for that. Anyway, maybe you could join a club, I mean that's definitely a way to meet people with similar interests. Good luck to you and me both


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## anawnymousseK (Oct 24, 2011)

I'm in the same boat, maybe even worse. I had acquaintances and roommates who I had hung out with (prolly out of pity), but after the school year we would never be in contact again. My anxiety has gotten so bad that I am afraid to walk in open areas in my school. **** it's so bad that ppl in my major avoid me like the plague due to how weird and anxiety ridden I am. At this point I think I would give up anything to just restart the past four years of my life. My life has literally become a nightmare that I can't wake my self out of and I have to live with that extra layer of guilt that my parents have provided everything for me financially and I still cant feel happy for myself and get **** sorted out.


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## lethe1864 (Jun 25, 2014)

Yeah i can relate, im about to start my senior yr in college and my classes tend to have all the same people who have their groups already, so awkward trying to join an existing group


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## MiiSzAshley (Sep 1, 2011)

I can highly relate to this too. I have a big social anxiety and Its so hard for me to approach people, because Im so scared of what they would think of me. I'm in my Junior year actually, but one way Im trying to cope with this is by joining a couple of clubs.


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## Aliceinchains (Feb 7, 2011)

Same here as well. I spend two hours getting ready in the morning hoping I look good enough for someone to approach me and befriend me but it looks like I'm going to be friendless all year. A few people did talk to me but they got along better with other students in my class and I go to a small community college so pretty much everyone has friends except me. Its just so mortifying being alone everyday while everyone else is with their friends and I know its my own fault because I'm just too scared to be rejected and try to talk to them. I tried talking to a couple of my classmates but I felt they didn't like me, I feel so embarrassed. I don't ever want to feel rejected again I cant even deal with the past rejection.


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## Family Guy (Jun 16, 2010)

I'm a junior in college and made 0 friends. (Well, I have 1 friend from high school who goes to the same college as me, but I'm not counting that). It's really hard to make close friendships with people in college. I just never seemed to fit in anywhere. Even my roommates aren't real "friends". I made many acquaintances through classes and programs I'm in but I wouldn't classify them as "friends". It sucks because I feel like I'll be a loner with no friends til the day I die. :sigh


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