# Group guitar lessons



## MattFoley (Dec 5, 2009)

Just signed up for group guitar lessons starting a week from this saturday. One of the most anxiety provoking things for me is having to perform in any way in front of people. The scale ranges from telling a story in front of people which is fairly easy all the way up to playing music in front of people. Music is probably a 9 out of 10 as far as nerves go and I'm going to be doing it in less than two weeks. Not only playing the guitar but singing too! Oh ****. 

There are 8 sessions. My goal is to go to every single one of them and trying as hard as I can to get as much out of it as I can. I'm going to try to update after every one so there should be 8 more posts coming from me in the future. If there aren't, feel free to belittle me to light a fire under my ***.


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## PHD in Ebonics (Jan 5, 2010)

Great for you! Hope you go through with it.

While playing guitar is practically the only thing I don't fail at life in, I can never ever play in front of someone else. It's one of my biggest problems anxiety-wise.


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## strawberryjulius (Jun 28, 2009)

That sounds really great, I hope you enjoy it, good luck! I can't play guitar in front of people either. o.0


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## WalkingDisaster (Nov 27, 2010)

Playing guitar in front of others- I'm fine with it.
Talking to others- not so much...


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## Cheesecake (Feb 2, 2007)

A week from this Saturday? I'll mark it on my calendar.
I'll be waiting for another post from you. So you better go through with this.


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## heroin (Dec 10, 2010)

I don't "perform", but when I play (with what meagre skills I have) music, I tend to concentrate on the music rather than people around me. I find it a lot less distracting as well as enjoyable. Forget about who's looking at you. Just enjoy what you're playing.


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## sparky10 (Dec 30, 2008)

Good luck im sure you will succeed with it! Keep the updates coming


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## trevor35th (Oct 22, 2008)

Hey Becks, just saw this thread. Good luck! Keep us updated on how it goes. 

I think if you can do this, your nerves will eventually become less of a hurdle and actually help you perform better in the future. I've noticed a lot of artists say they always get nervous, but their nerves are what help them deliver top-notch performances. I don't think I could ever do this; my anxiety would be off the scale. I wouldn't even be able to pick up the guitar. :afr lol


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## MattFoley (Dec 5, 2009)

Thanks for the responses guys. I'm going to restring my guitar tonight so I don't have these nasty old strings for tomorrow. I'm feeling a bit nervous when I think about going which is frustrating because I know it's just lessons. It's no big deal really. Still, I'm really good at getting anxious from just about anything.



heroin said:


> I don't "perform", but when I play (with what meagre skills I have) music, I tend to concentrate on the music rather than people around me. I find it a lot less distracting as well as enjoyable. Forget about who's looking at you. Just enjoy what you're playing.


This here is going to help me, I can tell. It's so obvious but something that never enters my mind. I do love playing music (even though i suck) and I think if I really focus on what I'm playing instead of all the stuff that's going through my head it's going to help a ton. Thanks


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## melissa75 (Feb 16, 2010)

This sounds so fun! Forget the anxiety and just enjoy the moment . Let us know how it goes tomorrow!


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## MattFoley (Dec 5, 2009)

OK, I went to the first session today. I got to the building about a half hour too early and I was feeling some anticipatory anxiety. It came in waves. I would feel it really bad and then just tell myself to calm down and really try to rewrite the thoughts in my head. Whenever I started thinking that I was going to be too nervous too play and that I would make a fool out of myself I would try to think about the entire experience as a challenge. I would think " I am doing this because I want to confront something that makes me anxious and I want to prove to myself that I can do this". For some reason when I thought of it this way my pride completely took over and my anxiety literally went away. I guess when I see what I'm doing as a challenge I feel defiant. You know, of course I can do this. There's no reason to be nervous. I'll show _me_ what I can do!

So I walk into the building about 15 minutes early and hang out in the auditorium with no anxiety at all. When the teachers got there they dismissed us to our small group rooms and we got all set up with our guitars and the first thing the teacher says is, "lets go around and introduce ourselves to the group." I hate this. It's another anxiety producing situation that I've always had a hard time with. Anyways, people are introducing themselves around the circle and for a moment my heart starts pounding out of my chest. The anxiety is there and It's making me think that I'm going to make an *** out of myself. Once again I do that same thing in my head where I challenge myself. The anxiety goes away again and I'm able to focus on what people are saying and what's going on in the room instead of being in my head. It gets to be my turn to introduce myself and I have no problem and even joke around with the teacher a little.

From there we start playing songs and it turns out it wasn't difficult at all. It was actually the most fun I've had in a long time. After the first song the teacher wanted us to sing and while I didn't sing very loudly I still did. It was actually really cool the way we were all playing and I started to get into it a little bit. It got to the point where I wanted to keep playing even though the lesson was over

So yeah, this was awesome. I felt some anxiety but I was really able to overcome it and have fun. That's always so hard for me because usually I'm so paranoid of my anxiety that all my focus goes to controlling it and I have no focus left to just enjoy myself. I'm really glad that I did this and I'm really looking forward to the next lesson. My only regret was not being more outgoing to some of the people in the class. There were a couple of people I wanted to talk to but for whatever reason I kept to myself. Oh well, I guess I need to take things one at a time. That can be my goal for the next session.


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## melissa75 (Feb 16, 2010)

Great job!!! It NEVER fails that my heart starts pounding when we're asked to make introductions around the room. Sounds like you still had a great time despite the anxiety you had to go through. I like the way you're able to push yourself through it by telling yourself it's a good challenge, and there's no reason you can't do it, basically...which is so true. Next time you'll have to at least talk to one of those people you find interesting .


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## trevor35th (Oct 22, 2008)

Nice job, man! Kudos for having the courage to go to the building and participate in the guitar lessons. The first time is probably the hardest, because there's always the fear of the unknown. It sounds like you had a level of confidence that will probably grow as you keep playing. 

You said you had a sense of pride that took over and then your anxiety went away. I think that's my biggest problem, I can't seem to find that pride. I don't have it, and I have no confidence or self esteem, so there's nothing to push me forward. So I just avoid challenging myself in most situations, I guess. I've basically given up. How do you get that pride, or where do you find it?


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## MattFoley (Dec 5, 2009)

Thanks guys, I'm already looking forward to the next lesson 



trevor35th said:


> You said you had a sense of pride that took over and then your anxiety went away. I think that's my biggest problem, I can't seem to find that pride. I don't have it, and I have no confidence or self esteem, so there's nothing to push me forward. So I just avoid challenging myself in most situations, I guess. I've basically given up. How do you get that pride, or where do you find it?


I'm not really sure to be honest. I have so much inner duologue that it's hard to pinpoint any one thing. I'll try though. I think that I'm starting to reach the point where I realize that if I don't do anything to challenge myself I'm going to remain a loser shut-in for the rest of my life and I'm going to hate myself for squandering it all. The best way I've found to tackle those challenges is to make it so that I have to prove it to myself that I can do it. For me personally there is some part deep down that's ignorant enough to believe that I can do anything. And when I make it into a challenge to show myself that I can, I feel more confident. If that doesn't work though I tell myself that I am doing this so that I can progress and get better. I tell myself angrily almost. _You are doing this to challenge yourself and get better. Now quit *****ing, take a look at the big picture, and get your *** in there and do it._ Kind of like that. Either way you have to realize that if you don't challenge yourself you have a 0% chance of improving. If you do at least there a chance, regardless of how small, that things will work out well. Hell, I thought there was a 1% chance that this first lesson was going to end in anything other than me as a mess of anxiety. That didn't happen though. It turns out it was awesome, so I was wrong.


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## trevor35th (Oct 22, 2008)

Very interesting! I can see how that would help. I need to get in that mindset. I think another reason I've given up is the fact that I always make excuses for myself, like saying, 'no one else has been in my shoes' or 'I'm happy in my comfort zone' or 'at least I'm happy'. They're basically true but I could be living a much richer life if I went out of my comfort zone more. Damn, why does it have to be so hard?! :afr


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## MattFoley (Dec 5, 2009)

Ok, so I just had week 2 of group guitar lessons.

I'm starting to realize that a big part of the reason I'm not having anxiety over this is because there are 10 other people in the room with me banging around on their guitars and you cant really hear any 1 person. When the teacher came around to us individually today I started to get a bit anxious because it was just me playing by myself. So I'm going to have to somehow step up next week and bust out a solo in the middle of the class. haha. No, honestly in group lessons I don't know how to be the center of attention. Any ideas?

On a positive note I did talk it up with a few people in the group like I had been planning to do from last week. The people there seem really cool and I wasn't nervous at all. At bit awkward maybe but not nervous. I'm thinking it would be cool to eventually ask some of them if they wanted to practice outside of class. But that will be later. I also spoke up during the class and asked questions and stuff like that. Seems small but I didn't feel anxious at all and thats always a good feeling.

It also dawned on me today that my guitar teacher is kind of a babe. She's really sweet and friendly with us too. That definitely helps with motivation  

So next week, 10 minute guitar solo in the middle of the class while winking at my teacher and telling her "Sit back. I got this". No, just kidding. I guess my goal for next week is to keep being outgoing with my classmates and sing louder and let loose a bit more.


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## JackSparrow (Oct 31, 2010)

Good luck man, I think this will really help you if you have the right attitude and you seem to. I'm playing guitar with people in groups a few times a week and it has really helped me with nerves, to the point where I'm not nervous anymore at rehearsals. Still can't talk to my bandmates though...


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## sparky10 (Dec 30, 2008)

keep the good work up man , it sounds like you are making some strides
with the sa whilst improving at something you love. Its good to hear about 
your progress, i took up the guitar 6 months ago but not been to a group
like yourself. Im getting lessons and hope to be in an band if and when im
good enough. Kudos to you for doing this and i like your attitude


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## Canadian Brotha (Jan 23, 2009)

Sounds like it's going well so far man, Congrats!


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## MattFoley (Dec 5, 2009)

Thanks for the encouragement guys. I'm sure this stuff is boring to read through so I appreciate you taking the time. Hopefully I can keep challenging myself with these lessons although I think I'm going to have to get pretty creative in order to keep feeling anxiety from it. At the end of the sessions though I've heard that my class is going to put on a little concert in the schools auditorium which means me being up on stage with my classmates playing for people. It's probably going to be really hokey but the thought of being up on stage in front of people makes me nervous. I'm going to do it though.


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## Cheesecake (Feb 2, 2007)

It's not boring. This is like a story to me. It has a main character I can relate to and I want to see how everything unfolds. And I also want to see a happy ending.


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## Yella (Sep 27, 2010)

Wow! You are doing great! You are doing all the things I wish I could do. I'm taking a photography class this Wednesday, and I hope I can be as social and comfortable as you have been. You are actually an inspiration for me to reach out to the folks in my photog class.


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## trevor35th (Oct 22, 2008)

I agree with everyone else. It's inspiring to read how everything is unfolding and how you're making it happen. The sessions sound like they're a lot of fun. I'd much rather read through positive threads like these. Good job and keep it up!!


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## Slogger (Dec 14, 2010)

Becks, it's so cool that you're doing this! Don't dwell on what you think are setbacks, just keep moving forward. Show us how it's done man!


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## sparky10 (Dec 30, 2008)

dont let the anxiety get you down man! kudos for getting out there 
and keeping up with the lessons Just a question how long have you been playing and are you all of a similiar standard at the group?


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## Cheesecake (Feb 2, 2007)

Hey, at least you're trying. It won't always go as well as you hope, but as long as you look at the big picture then it won't look too bad. The first few meetings were good, and this one was not too good. So it looks like overall it has been good.


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