# Why do christians try to change me when tell them I'm agnostic?



## Phoenix16 (Jan 25, 2013)

Whenever people bring up the topic of religion, they get really pissed when I tell them I'm agnostic. I'm really polite when I tell them, and I never bring up the topic on my own....Then we sort of get into a friendly discussion about it, and they invite me to their church. It's like they're trying to save me or something. Then they proceed to tell me that I'm going to hell. I then tell them my beliefs(or lack of them) and they get pissed. Has anyone else had to deal with this? It's like I can't even talk about it without people wanting to kill me.


----------



## z01210 (Aug 15, 2012)

Because we're Pure Evil.


----------



## Sheeshle (Jan 26, 2013)

Many believe that if they save souls then they get a spot closer to god when they are sitting at his feet in heaven. It is quite literally a competition. It is their duty and they are just trying to be good Christians. A great many of them actually do have good intentions and are concerned for you. However, none of that changes the fact that it is incredibly annoying, patronising, rude and aggressive . The problem is that you are polite and they view this as you being interested.


----------



## Xenos (Jun 24, 2012)

I mean, at the cognitive level, your skepticism calls into question their own belief, so they probably feel sort of threatened by it - particularly if they have some buried doubt or insecurity about it themselves. So they get a little defensive, and the need to convert you is partly a response to that. And as they do it, their religion gives them cover: there's a built-in imperative to convert others, thus 'saving' them. (This is probably by design.)


----------



## brandonmag (Jan 21, 2013)

depends on the personn yo


----------



## millyxox (Dec 18, 2009)

Tell me about it...It's especially hard when your very own family members try to convert you every 5 minutes. I hate it, I respect their beliefs but they can't even respect my way of life. They might have good intentions but it's annoying as hell & you get to the point where you just want them to STFU already but you can't say that because they're family. So the only solution is to stay far away from them.


----------



## Patriot (Oct 14, 2011)

Because otherwise you'll go to hell! *eyeroll*


----------



## Pesten (Oct 22, 2012)

because they're brainwashed. :blah

ignore them


----------



## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

Yes I usually just don't tell any Christians about it... because I do always get this reaction. Most of them seem to get mad and HAVE to change your mind so you think like them. I cant be friends with real Christians because they are always trying to force their views. I say real, because there are loads of Christians that say they love god and everything but don't even try to live morally or follow anything theyre suppose to believe.


----------



## niacin (May 26, 2012)

Because they think they are helping you. It's like my Italian aunties trying to force feed me spaghetti when I am on a diet. They care, but they are being pushy and piss me off. But what are you gonna do? That's all they know. If you were them, then you'd be doing the same thing too, because you would be them. They only have their own life experiences to go off of. Just brush them off. You can't really slap your auntie and still look like a nice person.


----------



## Sierpinski (Jun 17, 2012)

It's because of a passage in the Gospel of Mark: "And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature."


----------



## Noca (Jun 24, 2005)

Sierpinski said:


> It's because of a passage in the Gospel of Mark: "And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature."


Does that mean Christians are supposed to preach the gospel to cows, ants, whales, seagulls, pigs etc? They are "creature"s after all right? Looks like they got a lot of work to do then!



KelsKels said:


> Yes I usually just don't tell any Christians about it... because I do always get this reaction. Most of them seem to get mad and HAVE to change your mind so you think like them. I cant be friends with real Christians because they are always trying to force their views. I say real, because there are loads of Christians that say they love god and everything but don't even try to live morally or follow anything theyre suppose to believe.


Yeah, I don't mind the Christians who don't subscribe to dogma. They may be idiots, but at least they are tolerable human beings.


----------



## WTFnooooo (Mar 27, 2010)

millyxox said:


> Tell me about it...It's especially hard when your very own family members try to convert you every 5 minutes. I hate it, I respect their beliefs but they can't even respect my way of life. They might have good intentions but it's annoying as hell & you get to the point where you just want them to STFU already but you can't say that because they're family. *So the only solution is to stay far away from them*.


Not really.

If things do not get that heated you can try to debate them, exercise your reason and improve your arguments.


----------



## ericastooge (May 20, 2009)

Phoenix16 said:


> Whenever people bring up the topic of religion, they get really pissed when I tell them I'm agnostic. I'm really polite when I tell them, and I never bring up the topic on my own....Then we sort of get into a friendly discussion about it, and they invite me to their church. It's like they're trying to save me or something. Then they proceed to tell me that I'm going to hell. I then tell them my beliefs(or lack of them) and they get pissed. Has anyone else had to deal with this? It's like I can't even talk about it without people wanting to kill me.


It's not biblical to force someone to believe on the lord Jesus Christ. Real Christians should know not to force someone on that choice. If I was giving the gospel to someone and I can see that they're choosing not to believe or they're reprobates, and they're polite about of it, I would just walk away, wouldn't stay and argue, staying pissed off because they're not believing. It's a waste of time. Jesus tells us to move on.


----------



## Sierpinski (Jun 17, 2012)

Noca said:


> Does that mean Christians are supposed to preach the gospel to cows, ants, whales, seagulls, pigs etc? They are "creature"s after all right? Looks like they got a lot of work to do then!


Preach to mushrooms. They might preach back.


----------



## Imspartacus (Sep 29, 2012)

ericastooge said:


> It's not biblical to force someone to believe on the lord Jesus Christ. Real Christians should know not to force someone on that choice. If I was giving the gospel to someone and I can see that they're choosing not to believe or they're reprobates, and they're polite about of it, I would just walk away, wouldn't stay and argue, staying pissed off because they're not believing. It's a waste of time. Jesus tells us to move on.


:agree


----------



## Backwards (Nov 16, 2012)

I was raised Baptist and I'm now agnostic, so I have a pretty good understanding of this. It's literally written in the Bible that, as a Christian, you should try to convert others to Christianity. However, that DOES NOT mean forcing your beliefs down someone's throat. If a Christian simply brings it up, there just doing what their religion teaches. It's not really an issue until they go overboard and tell you you're going to hell if you don't join them every 5 minutes.

There are around 40,000 denominations of Christianity at this point though, so it's not like most of them actually do what the Bible says anyway.


----------



## Mayonesa (Jan 20, 2013)

I'm a Christian...but I'm not the "showy", "preachy" type. I actually get uncomfortable to talk to people about God. Even as a Christian you get preached at from other Christians. It does say in the Bible something about if Christians do not "plant the seed" then the blood of that person's "death" will be on the Christian's hands...however to try to force something to grow is not at all mentioned in the Bible. I really don't talk about God to people who don't want to talk about him. As far as I'm concerned, if people want me to talk about the Bible I will...but if they don't then I wont...especially since I'm shy as it is. lol. 
Just don't let it bother you. It can get super annoying and the act of preaching at people usually does the exact opposite of what the preacher was trying to achieve. Some people believe that they have been granted the authority in life to get into everyone else's business. It's not right, and it makes Christians in general look like hysterical lunatics.


----------



## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

Some of you seem to live in religion-dominated areas.

As an ex-Christian, I can say that the root reason is because their religion teaches that non-believers ultimately get eternally damned after death and they want to stop that. I would suggest to be polite and resolute where necessary (e.g. "thanks but I don't believe in God, nothing personal). It helps if your reasons for not believing are good, not to the effect of "I hate God/Christians" or something similar. Hope this helps.


----------



## beothuck1 (Nov 16, 2010)

Can't say I have dealt with this, because I am a nondenominational believer. Blame it on the Christian doctrine they might have been taught. It is stressed in some Christian faiths that unbelievers will go to hell and it is often taught to go out and try to help sinners find God. 

I've heard people discuss this before and a couple people commented that if you don't believe in hell, why do you even care if a Christian says this to you?

I can sort of understand where you are coming from though. Not because I am an unbeliever, but because boyfriend is. He would be very offended if I said he was going to hell, it would be like I was saying he was a bad person, which he isn't. 

Try to not let their comments bother you if you can. I think these people may mean well and care about you even if they may be coming across as pushy or angry. I think that pushiness may be a result of the particular chuch they attend and what is taught there or maybe even their own individual interpretation of what has been taught.


----------



## SandyInfinity (Feb 7, 2013)

why... 
i think they hate ppl who dont like same thigs as them, which is bad because suposely christians should be nice in heart.. i think atheist are nicer


----------



## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

beothuck1 said:


> Can't say I have dealt with this, because I am a nondenominational believer. Blame it on the Christian doctrine they might have been taught. It is stressed in some Christian faiths that unbelievers will go to hell and it is often taught to go out and try to help sinners find God.
> 
> I've heard people discuss this before and a couple people commented that if you don't believe in hell, why do you even care if a Christian says this to you?
> 
> ...


In their defense, I've researched on the subject of hell and the bible years back and concluded that the evidence that the book means what most of us understand it to be is stronger, though not overwhelmingly so, than that there isn't. I vaguely remember some scripture that I couldn't really interpret any other way than to conclude that it was implying that hell is said to be a real entity.


----------



## Hero (Feb 14, 2010)

They will want you to attend their church or change your beliefs for their own purposes such as 

claiming you convertered your friend
saving him from hell
introducing to the lord christ almighty
brownie points for any of the above
their own beliefs bring yours into question so you must turn them to prove your way its right.
you actually want to help that person and u believe the answer to that is God.
your church needs more money
your church needs more people
you want another friend at church
you like that person romantically and you think church is a good way to get close to em. (actually funny story i used to go to church just to see the girl i liked  ) 

But yeah really the list goes on. You dont have to generalise em but understand their need. I mean if you met someone who u thought was socially anxious and they never heard of this site you would tell them right? actually thats a bad one


How about someone who never saw star wars or dark knight or harry potter or twighlight. That feeling you get when u hear that .. now multiply that by 3. Now multiply it by the illogical feelings and thoughts behind god. Now add that to what you previously multiplied by 3 and now THATS WHY THEY NEED TO CONVERT U.


----------



## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

Hero said:


> How about someone who never saw star wars or dark knight or harry potter or twighlight. That feeling you get when u hear that .. now multiply that by 3. Now multiply it by the illogical feelings and thoughts behind god. Now at that to what you previously multiplied by 3 and now THATS WHY THEY NEED TO CONVERT U.


Have you heard of broscience? I think you just invented.. bromath XD


----------



## straightarrows (Jun 18, 2010)

normal, they want to save you and share Blood,,,


----------



## Hero (Feb 14, 2010)

preston2 said:


> Have you heard of broscience? I think you just invented.. bromath XD


lol ty . but if the person is honestly ur friend. take comfort in the fact they care enough about you to attempt to help in their own misguided way. 
everyone else u can prob tell to fck off but up to u .


----------



## Timbolin (Oct 27, 2012)

Phoenix16 said:


> Whenever people bring up the topic of religion, they get really pissed when I tell them I'm agnostic. I'm really polite when I tell them, and I never bring up the topic on my own....Then we sort of get into a friendly discussion about it, and they invite me to their church. It's like they're trying to save me or something. Then they proceed to tell me that I'm going to hell. I then tell them my beliefs(or lack of them) and they get pissed. Has anyone else had to deal with this? It's like I can't even talk about it without people wanting to kill me.


why do you bring it up at all around people like that? just say nothing

Agnostic is a sitting-on-fence response which is why you're getting hounded by the god squad.

Tell them anything to make them go away. I worship satan, I'm an atheist, I'm catholic, whatever.


----------



## Foh_Teej (May 5, 2004)

Phoenix16 said:


> Whenever people bring up the topic of religion, they get really pissed when I tell them I'm agnostic.... I then tell them my beliefs(or lack of them) and they get pissed.


First off, ditch the term agnosticism as you are an atheist. Agnosticism does not describe belief. Second, inform theists you speak with that they have never met the burden of proof -that any god or gods exist- outside of arguments from ignorance and pure wishful thinking. This pisses them off more than anything. I can give you tips on how to frustrate them as well if you wish.


----------



## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

Foh_Teej said:


> [...] outside of arguments from ignorance and pure wishful thinking. This pisses them off more than anything. I can give you tips on how to frustrate them as well if you wish.


Wonder what brought you to SAS ;-p


----------



## Foh_Teej (May 5, 2004)

preston2 said:


> Wonder what brought you to SAS ;-p


the beer and women of course


----------



## Levibebop (Feb 15, 2013)

Churches convince you to go out and "save" others. It's usually just common protocol, although some take it very seriously.


----------



## Bobo157 (Feb 17, 2013)

What about friends who believe God talks to them? Is that bad? I have a friend who says God talks to him and tells him things and he's serious. He has a family of his own and swears that God sends him signs. I'm kinda worried about him. I don't know what to do but I feel bad about telling him to snap out of it. He's pretty convinced.

He tries to convert me all the time and I just tell him I can't. He doesn't understand. When they are that deep in belief I don't know what to do.


----------



## Foh_Teej (May 5, 2004)

Bobo157 said:


> What about friends who believe God talks to them? Is that bad?


There are several in the spiritual forum like this too. I'm banned from posting but I often read their quack stories.


----------



## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

Bobo157 said:


> What about friends who believe God talks to them? Is that bad? I have a friend who says God talks to him and tells him things and he's serious. He has a family of his own and swears that God sends him signs. I'm kinda worried about him. I don't know what to do but I feel bad about telling him to snap out of it. He's pretty convinced.


A lot of people believe this in varying forms and magnitudes.



> He tries to convert me all the time and I just tell him I can't. He doesn't understand. When they are that deep in belief I don't know what to do.


Ask him to put the shoe on the other foot and ask how he'd feel if you or a Muslim or someone else devout in their religion tried to 'witness' to him the way he does to you.


----------



## misski (Sep 25, 2011)

Just like how Christians want to save gays and "turn them" straight, they want to save non-believers and turn our life around. That's how it is.


----------



## Freiheit (Dec 8, 2008)

This is why I don't tell my parents about my agnosticism. My father especially would try to demonize my lack of "faith" and it would get ugly. They think you will burn in hell, that's why.


----------



## Paperwalls (Feb 26, 2013)

beothuck1 said:


> Can't say I have dealt with this, because I am a nondenominational believer.


Same. I sometimes will explain what agnostic means and they've been accepting of it. I also might differ because while I don't think any particular religion is for me or believe in any real deity, I still am very "live and let live" when it comes to this topic. I don't get defensive about it.

In the few instances I've had where someone tries to preach to me or convert me, I just sort of tune them out. I'll take their literature. If it's someone I'm close with though, I'll just change the subject or drop it.


----------



## zonebox (Oct 22, 2012)

For one, the Bible instructs them to. Other than that, I think it is mostly human nature - take any ideology and you will almost always find people trying to convert you to their views. I see it with just about any group of people, who think they have the answers, which is not limited to theists, I've seen atheists do it as well. 

The worst is with politics though, it gets really nasty when it comes down to politics.


----------



## Jamezzy (Feb 26, 2013)

We are called to spread the gospel.

And we are supposed to do it WITH and IN love towards the person. One of the most important things we must do and remember is to NOT shove it down people's throats. If the person hears about Jesus and rejects him,well, atleast we told them about Jesus and it is up to the individual to decide. True Christians don't intend to 'brainwash' anyone. We're not called to be robots with cold statements. We really want to befriend you and we are willing to help you with whatever it is in life that you're going through. You see Christians strive to be positive, like Jesus. 

There's a verse in the bible where it talks about giving your enemy food, drink and a place to sleep. That's not to say let the enemy walk all over you etc etc. There's alot of corruption in the Christian faith although, radicals, extremists, etc etc. True Christians don't 'hate' people, because it goes against ALL things Christian. 

Love...hate...They're probably different, no?

We Christians are NOT perfect. Like all human beings.
We just wanna help, in the purest sense. 

There are self-proclaimed/fake Christians as well as Christians struggling in life.
So don't be surprised when one starts cussing, or offending you. Those Christians may be the ones I just listed above this sentence. Being a nondenominational believer, I'm not perfect, sometimes they piss me off too, especially in YouTube comments....

Anyway, this is my first post on SAS. I believe I'm on the wrong part of SAS, this was not my reason for joining lol
Hopefully that clarifies it a bit for some.


----------



## theCARS1979 (Apr 26, 2010)

Im a follower of the Davinci Code , and the Holy Grail, and the Holy Bloodline myself. I guess this is considered agnostic.


----------



## noscreenname (Feb 24, 2013)

It's about insecurity and control. Spreading the good news doesn't mean shoving it down peoples throats. Jesus ate with sinners all the time and was condemned for it. Ironically today's Christians are the new pharisee.


----------



## jrose1982 (Feb 1, 2013)

I never understood this about Christians - until I figured out how to pay off my debt, and then started losing weight. Once you find something that works for you - whether it makes you happy or helps you reach a goal - there's a strong tendency for the human mind to think it the best thing for everyone and it has to be shared. I still have to conciously stop myself from lecturing people about their spending habits or telling them why their diets aren't working. It comes from a desire to help, but people don't want to hear it, they need room to figure things out on their own.

Once I learned that, I learned how to deal with others who do the same thing to me - just let them talk. I don't tell people anything about my faith unless they specifically ask (and sometimes I'll answer "none of your business", depending on how the question is asked). When others talk about their faith I just politely listen and smile. They feel good because they're allowed to talk. But I'm protected from the invasive efforts to "save" me because they're not certain I need saving.


----------



## theCARS1979 (Apr 26, 2010)

tieffers said:


> If you say you're agnostic, both 'sides' see that as an opportunity to convert you.
> 
> An example...I know a few Catholic families. My family has always been a-religious. My family gets way more Mormon missionaries on our doorstep than the Catholics I've talked to about it. If you don't have an ideology, religious people and atheists alike just see you as an empty vessel to fill with knowledge and the truth...a.k.a., propaganda.


I grew up catholic and up until the time I was like 15 i went to church often. As time went on i still followed the catholic way of thinking until later on i heard about the Davinci code and the secrets of the last supper the whole story of the bloodline and the holy grail, thats when i changed my beliefs. Im guessing they call it Agnostic, and it made more sense and was more realistic to be honest. I haven't been to a Catholic church since.


----------



## worldcitizen (Aug 28, 2011)

I find its usually the atheists that try to convert me when I tell them that I'm agnostic. They think that I'm just intellectually lazy and am just one step away from being fully enlightened (i.e atheist). In fact, I think there is a thread where the atheist OP used the very words 'intellectually lazy' to describe us agnostics.


----------



## Unkn0wn Pleasures (Nov 24, 2011)

To alot of Christians "agnostic" means being undecided, and being content with being undecided (which annoys them).


----------



## worldcitizen (Aug 28, 2011)

Unkn0wn Pleasures said:


> To alot of Christians "agnostic" means being undecided, and being content with being undecided (which annoys them).


Annoys a lot of atheists, too.


----------



## Foh_Teej (May 5, 2004)

worldcitizen said:


> Annoys a lot of atheists, too.


It annoys anyone -atheists and theists alike- that know the proper use of the term.


----------



## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

jrose1982 said:


> I never understood this about Christians


My first post in this thread (#20), second sentence.

What you say applies in many circumstances too, but what I said is the base reason Christians are generally encouraged to do so.


----------

