# I can't take this anymore... I don't know what to do



## AhDo (Aug 6, 2013)

My first 2 years of college have been absolutely miserable. While everyone was making new friends and having the time of their lives, I was sitting in my dorm all day because I couldn't talk to people. My schedule last year was literally: class, eat lunch in dining hall alone, class, eat dinner in dining hall alone, gym, HW, sleep. I know that even if I had friends to hang out with though, I would be too socially anxious/weird to really enjoy it. 

I really want to make the best of my college years. I had a rough childhood, and all my life I've been socially anxious. I could never talk to people, could never make friends, could never enjoy doing anything in my life. The anxiety really took over my life and encroached itself into everything I did. I feel like my college years will be the last time I'll ever be able to have fun. It's the last part of my childhood that I will never get back and I'm just wasting it here being a miserable loner. 

My social anxiety has been slowly getting better everyday but it takes time and I still can barely speak to people. I need time to get over my social anxiety. The problem is that my parents won't let me take a year off unless I get a job and I don't have the money to move out. I spent most of this summer trying affiliate marketing which didn't go that well. Now I'm looking for actual jobs. I'm pretty confident I'll get a few calls back if I spread my resume around (studying CS in a good school along with web design/marketing experience). The problem is that I will completely bomb the interview.


What can I do? I can't take another semester of being a complete loner. It's not even that I don't like being a loner but I hate being constantly reminded that I am the only guy in college with has no friends. I'm actually pretty content with myself chilling at home where it's not "weird" to be a loner if you know what I'm saying.


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## versavice (Jul 9, 2013)

Well, finding a job will help with anxiety. The more interactions you have, the more practice you get, which leads to being a little more confident. You won't know that you'll blow the interview till you try. Depending on the employer, interviews may not be that important anyways. The interviewer won't try to make you feel uncomfortable, so just be yourself, and you'll get through it.
Have any hobbies? Even if you don't, you can find a group or club to join at your university. I know it may be hard to sum up the courage, but for me, if I enjoying doing something, or if I'm knowledgable in certain subject, it helps me be more sociable.
Hope this helps.


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## Nono441 (May 14, 2012)

Did I create a new account? Because you sound almost like me 

I say hold on for another year, get your degree (look for possible employers during that time so you know where to apply) and then decide what to do. I think paradoxally if you are working on your anxiety at university then things will get a lot better once you get a job, because you'll be around new people who don't know you and you'll be able to start fresh. I know how it feels at uni being "the loner" and that's a reputation that is pretty ****ing hard to clean yourself from.

But then I'm really bad at multitasking, so maybe this isn't the right thing to do for you, good luck anyway :squeeze


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