# Went to my cousin's wedding



## Lucy3 (Jan 9, 2008)

and had a great time. I’ll tell you the tale starting on Friday morning. 
I was terribly anxious while waiting for my parents to get ready, I knew what was coming ahead and I was not looking forward to it but I promised my cousin that I would go. 
What was coming up was the ceremony, the photographs, the dinner and then the disco at the end, I felt sick. I took the bottle of Diazepam with me in case I would need it and I knew I would. 
Once arriving at the huge manor place, I felt all right with greeting my relatives I wasn't so keen on meeting the grooms family so I just stayed away from them. 
Up in my single room I took some Diazepam and got changed into my dress for the ceremony. Back downstairs everyone sat down, I sat near the back with my nan's 'companion' who I am good friends with and he looked after me. The ceremony was beautiful and the medication started to get to work but I still wanted it to be over quick as I didn't like standing then sitting back down but I was happy for my cousin when she became a wife. 
Then the photographs had to be taken then and I was fine outside in the fresh air while the photos were being took. As soon as the last photo was snapped the first raindrop decided to fall so we all went back inside, now we had a bit of a break until the dinner. So I decided to leave the busy crowd and go upstairs to my other cousin (brother of the bride) to see how he was getting on as he has similar social problems. 
In his suite we played on the Wii and joked and talked with each other. At four my dad came to collect us to tell us dinner was ready so back downstairs we went and into the main room where it was all decorated nicely. I sat next to my cousin and my nan around the table. I had fun laughing and talking with my family while eating our meals. When the main meal came my dad asked for me to have a plain chicken breast instead of it being stuffed with a nutty garnish....I wasn't keen on eating that. 
While everyone else ate his or her main meals mine still hadn't come yet and I was getting anxious because I didn't want to eat when everyone else had stopped. Thankfully my meal came and I ate while everyone was still eating his or her own dinners, so anxiety gone and replaced with calm happiness again. I was starting to get the idea my Diazepam was running off but I was enjoying myself so much I felt that nothing was really bothering me and it was all fine.
After the 3 meals the speeches came, everyone quietened down to listen to the father of the bride, the groom and finally the best man. I think the champagne also helped a bit in the quite room. 
After that we all went into a small room just to chat and have tea and cakes, a few guests went home but more friends of the newly married couple came for the disco. I was tired and decided I would go to bed after watching the first dance. So at quarter past eight when the doors opened again and we could head inside the loud room, I stood at the edge of the dance floor with my happy aunt watching the bride and groom trip over each other's feet. I felt no anxiety at all. 
Unlike I planned I didn't go to bed I decided to stay downstairs and listen to the music and watch the already drunk dancers. I noticed I was kind of alone, everyone had someone to be with, I think I was the only single person there. But it didn't really bother me. 
My parents went upstairs to bed at ten and I still stayed downstairs with my sisters and their boyfriends who were trying to get me to dance, I refused. Later around eleven some clumsy girl stepped in glass and got a bit in her foot, so my eldest sister who's training to be a nurse decided to help her out. At that time however the song she and her boyfriend requested to dance to came on and my sister was still busy with the girls foot. Feeling sad and sorry for my sister’s boyfriend I got up, took off my jumper and asked.
"Want to go dance?" 
He agreed so making our way to the dance floor with my other sister and her boyfriend following we started to boogie on the dance floor. 
I felt my anxiety rising up in my stomach as I had no idea how to dance and had never danced at a disco before. But I thought, "hey more people had embarrassed themselves on this dance floor tonight, I can't be any worse" so I danced, shyly. My sister joined us after getting over the shock of seeing me on a dance floor. I danced to four songs during one the bride and groom danced silly with me for a bit. 
At half eleven I retreated up to my room and fell asleep instantly, extremely proud of myself. In the morning everyone was scheduled to be downstairs for breakfast, I didn't bother to take any Diazepam. Downstairs I enjoyed my breakfast without feeling any anxiety again and then finally it was time to go home. 
I can't wait to tell this to my therapist on Monday, thank you for reading my long post.


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## WhiteRaven (Feb 3, 2008)

That's great to hear that you survived the entire wedding and enjoyed it!  You even danced, wow, that takes courage. Congrats.


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## Lucy3 (Jan 9, 2008)

WhiteRaven said:


> That's great to hear that you survived the entire wedding and enjoyed it!  You even danced, wow, that takes courage. Congrats.


Thank you, I was really happy I went.


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## bleach0 (Jul 25, 2008)

Well done Lucy! You faced your fears and sounded very poised and social. You did brilliantly. :boogie


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## Lucy3 (Jan 9, 2008)

bleach0 said:


> Well done Lucy! You faced your fears and sounded very poised and social. You did brilliantly. :boogie


 Thank you. It was nice to relax for a bit and not to be so anxious all the time around everyone.


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