# CBT without the "C" - i don't think i can do this



## citizen_erased (Dec 18, 2007)

I'm supposed to be starting Exposure Therapy with my counsellor soon. The trouble is my counsellor doesn't specialize in CBT, she only does what she calls a "light version" of it (i asked her if she did and that's what she actually said). I've only seen her a few times and she hasn't even mentioned the "C" ie. Cognitive part - she just wants me to do this Exposure Therapy and i don't think i can do it without working on my negative thoughts i have when i'm anxious and how to change them, because she's the first counsellor or mental health professional of any type i've ever seen and even before i met her, i've been trying on my own for years to stop my negative thoughts and challenge them, but i just can't do it. They never go away, they just get worse and worse until they spiral out of control, leaving me even more anxious and depressed :sigh I was only put in touch with this service (that my counsellor is from)through my GP after seeing her about my SA, and i don't even think there are any other services of this type available in my area, not even any support groups, and i don't think i could afford to keep up seeing a CBT therapist privately on a regular basis either, so it feels like it's this or nothing. I don't know what to do - i don't feel like i'm going to make any progress this way which makes me lack motivation and enthusiam to do it - i tried to explain this all to my counsellor but i got the impression that she didn't understand and just thought i didn't care or wasn't interested in making the effort. It's so frustrating because that's not it at all. I just don't see how this type of therapy can possibly help me without changing the way i think :rain 

Sorry for the long post but i just don't know what to do and it's certainly not helping with my depression - i feel so hopeless thinking about all of this. I really need some help :sigh


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## emeraldoceans (Sep 13, 2006)

citizen_erased said:


> she just wants me to do this Exposure Therapy and i don't think i can do it without working on my negative thoughts i have when i'm anxious and how to change them, :sigh


Hi citizen_erased, you are totally right there, the cognitive part of CBT is by far the most important and should be dealt with first up. In my case exposure therapy was left till last and my therpist said there was a reason for that, and that was that i had to first challenge all of my negative beliefs and change the way that i percieved things, otherwise i would just react to these circumstances exactly the same way that i always have in the past. 
I think that most therapists on a whole are pretty good but seriously some just really dont have a clue, she cant just throw you in at the deep end, she could end up making things 10 times worse for you than they already are.


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## sprinter (Nov 22, 2003)

emeraldoceans said:


> citizen_erased said:
> 
> 
> > she just wants me to do this Exposure Therapy and i don't think i can do it without working on my negative thoughts i have when i'm anxious and how to change them, :sigh
> ...


 :agree The cognitive part is very importanat.


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## citizen_erased (Dec 18, 2007)

emeraldoceans said:


> she cant just throw you in at the deep end, she could end up making things 10 times worse for you than they already are.


This is exactly what i'm afraid of, but i don't know what to do. I don't want to do it this way but i don't know how to make her listen to me and understand that :sigh And i feel trapped because i don't know of any other services of this type in my area, like i said in my first post, it feels like i either have to do this or stop going to counselling and just try and carry on the way i was before :sigh


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## Captain Woodchuck (Sep 24, 2005)

citizen_erased said:


> - she just wants me to do this Exposure Therapy and i don't think i can do it without working on my negative thoughts i have when i'm anxious and how to change them,


What negative thoughts are causing you to feel anxious in social situations?

Perhaps we can help you change them, for free.


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## yeah_yeah_yeah (Mar 27, 2007)

:agree

Alternatively ...

"Coping With Social Anxiety and Shyness" by Gillian Butler (amazon restock in april)
"Coping With Shyness and Social Anxiety" by Ronald Rapee (bit pricey)

Like having an SA genius in your pocket!

Clean the old sweets and fluff out first ...


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