# am the only shy, anxietable, introverted person in the family, feel like a failure



## anawnymousseK (Oct 24, 2011)

Today, I had a family gathering at my house which I dread more than anything and brings upon the most anxiety upon myself as I feel insignificant compared to everybody in my family. Theyre all extroverted, have tons of friends/relationships, are getting married, and are on their way or already are a successful lawyer, businessman etc, while even though I am doing well in school academic wise in a respectable major (engineering), I am so ridden with anxiety that I cant talk to others without sounding like a dumbass, practically have no real friends and have no ability to network, and have been failing and will prolly continue to fail to get an internship/job as I lack any social skills whatsoever.

Despite taking a bit of phenibut for this social setting, i still sounded like a 2 year old in terms of social skills when talking to others and was continuously called out for being quiet and shy which only served to heighten my anxiety.

I just feel like a complete failure and feel like I have let my parents down as they have given the world to me and I have nothing to give back. I feel like I have been seen as a social inept failure by everyone for my whole life (in school, my family etc), and even though i have tried to ignore the criticism and use that fact as a source of motivation to better my life, its very hard to continue to do so when no one truly believes in yourself except your parents, and you realize that despite how hard you work you will still be seen as a failure and will continue to live alone and inevitably die alone. Sorry for the rant, I was just at a loss after this gathering and literally broke down and cried after it.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

I feel you, I'm the shy quiet one among 5 successful outgoing siblings, luckily I've rarely felt looked down on by them but I definitely place a lot of pressure on myself, having always been around family and friends that don't have SA I always expect myself to be the exact same, but having this social anxiety makes it so much harder to accomplish things that everyone else seems to do without any effort at all.


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## firestar (Jun 27, 2009)

You're not a failure. Living with SA makes everyday life so much harder that I think we have to be compassionate towards ourselves. You should be proud of what you've managed to accomplish despite having SA.

That said, I do not like being around my extended family, even though they're nice people, and I avoid them like the plague. With my younger siblings I'm okay because I think we're all messed up in our own way, but it's hard to be around people who share your DNA but who are normal. It's easy to judge yourself harshly in that setting.


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## Setolac (Jul 26, 2009)

I'm sorry to tell you but it would be very hard for you to land a job if you lack social skills. But it's a good thing that you chose a job that is meant for introverts. How old are you? Are you male?


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## anawnymousseK (Oct 24, 2011)

Setolac said:


> I'm sorry to tell you but it would be very hard for you to land a job if you lack social skills. But it's a good thing that you chose a job that is meant for introverts. How old are you? Are you male?


yup, i totally realize that and im a 20 year old male whos got about a bit less than 2 years of college left. I'm a bit bogged down with coursework at the moment which may attribute to me feeling a little bit down about myself but during the summer i hope to work on my presentation and interviewing skills with something like toastmasters


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## W A N D E R L U S T (Oct 2, 2012)

I blame being the middle child stuck between two really, really outgoing girls! But I did turn out very sneaky and creative which - I think - is the normal for middle children actually? 

I'm like a ninja! But yes, it sucks being the shy introverted one because I'm always compared to them which really doesn't help me become any more outgoing. And they're both a lot prettier... which also sucks. I'm pretty sure my parents don't even believe in me any more but I don't really care for that, I still love them and they still love me, they just have no faith in me. NONE. It's alright, I don't need their faith.


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