# My experimental anti SA training schedule



## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

This is supposed to be an accountability thread.

My SA prevents me from approaching people, even in "easy" situations. I do not want to be like that anymore. I hope that with a training schedule I can learn more and more to approach people. I start easy and increase the level slowly over the weeks. I do not set weekly goals, I make simple practice where my SA is only middle high. Then only increase when I feel comfortable enough on the current level. :yes

My long term goals of this training are:
- To be able to approach everyone for every reason with confidence.
- To be able to show emotions to people in a good way(right now I am often cold and push people away)

So this training will cover the following areas:
- Sport, because sport helps a lot(I use a training schedule I downloaded on how to run a marathon after 12 weeks of training)
- "Homework", different practices I found/find to change my mental state(like meditation, realistic thinking ...)
-Field practice, because how else I going to approach people if I do not go out and approach people

I also do no fap, it somehow gives me the drive to take this difficult task.

Wish me luck:teeth


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

I will post after every field practice, so 2 or 3 times a week!


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## Seuss (May 16, 2012)

Good luck!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Week 1: 12/08/14 - 12/13/14

<Mo> 
Homework:
-30 min meditation 
-20 min Mirror practice 1:
"practice in front of the mirror on being happy when you hear good news from someone: "Oh? That happened to you? how wonderfull!!!"
Exercise on not overdoing it and not underdoing it. Do it so many times so withing 1 year you'll nail it. You'll convince anyone that you're happy for them." by soctadin (http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f26/need-social-training-schedule-1284178/)

<Tue>
-Sport
Field practice:
-Ask as many people for direction as possible for on hour

<Wed>
Homework:
-30 min meditation 
-20 min Mirror practice 1

<Thu>
-Sport
Homework:
-30 min meditation 
-20 min Mirror practice 1

<Fri>
-Sport 
Field practice:
-Ask as many people for directions as possible for on hour

<Sat>
Homework:
-30 min meditation 
-20 min Mirror practice 1
-20 min Mirror practice 2: "stay in front of mirror and practice your charmisa as in the game "the sims". youtube that. "charmisa training in the sims". stand infront of a mirror and pretend that you are making a presentation for 30 people." by soctadin (http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f26/need-social-training-schedule-1284178/)


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 1:
On Tuesday I did nothing, somehow did not get out of house, except I did some sport, but no field practice.
So today I made the field practice by asking around 10 people for directions and one for time. At the beginning it was very hard to approach someone to ask for direction, but after 5 or so, it turned quite easy, but not easy enough, I still feel anxiety. After this I was in the train and just asked for the time, but not to one person but I said it loud so that someone could respond and someone did.

Also cool is that I ask a hot coworker "How are you?"(usually I only say "hi" to her), but not more.
However, I did not make good eye contact, this needs to be practiced more!!!
So this day was more successful than planed, unfortunately, because of yesterday I am still very sad.


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## k00ks (Apr 26, 2014)

Hey, Good luck! I am doing a similar thing.

I think i'm going to try that 10 people for directions thing. If you felt better after just asking 5 people I think it could be really beneficial for me!

At least you know the disappointment of missing a day now, so you'll have more motivation not to miss a day again. And make sure it doesn't!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 2: So I made the second field practice that was set for Friday. Again only asking for direction. The anxiety at start was lower than when I started last time. So I see progress. What was amazing, after I started, it got faster easier than last time. Funny is that this time many people did not know the location I was asking for because they are visitors. After a while I got euphoric: So I asked two cute girls for directions they said that they are visitors and do not know the answers. So I even asked where they are from. I did not continue the conversation but I feel great about this success.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Seuss said:


> Good luck!


Thank you.



k00ks said:


> Hey, Good luck! I am doing a similar thing.
> 
> I think i'm going to try that 10 people for directions thing. If you felt better after just asking 5 people I think it could be really beneficial for me!
> 
> At least you know the disappointment of missing a day now, so you'll have more motivation not to miss a day again. And make sure it doesn't!


Thank you. When you did this please post!


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## k00ks (Apr 26, 2014)

The Sorrow said:


> Thank you.
> 
> Thank you. When you did this please post!


Here

http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f10/my-plan-for-a-better-life-1292794/

This i ranted a bit too much though haha! But it helps me and i think documenting it all on here will be the motivation i need


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Week 2:
<Sun>
Free day, lets see how this training so far effect me at church.

<Mo>
Meditation 20 min
Practice smiling so that I feel happy myself.

<Tue>
Field practice: Ask strangers for directions

Sport

<Wed>
Meditation for 20 min
Mirror practice 2

<Thu>
Sport
Mirror practice 1

<Fr>
Field practice: Ask strangers for directions

<Sat>
Practice free speech. 
Sport


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## nomoreants (Mar 31, 2012)

What if u die tomorrow ...all ur long and short term goals will disappear


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

nomoreants said:


> What if u die tomorrow ...all ur long and short term goals will disappear


Dead would be awesome, this goals are only for the unfortunate case that I will continue to life


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## sarahsjourney (Jan 5, 2014)

Cool thread - keep us posted!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 3:
So today, I asked some people for direction again. I still feel some anxiety.
The first approach is always the most difficult, but after approaching some people for directions, I start to feel more confident. Funny was the first person. It was a girl at the main station. I ask her for directions, she was pretty confused, but it was very funny.

After the practice was finished for today. I was in the train home and actually talked to a group of older people(not much but this is still cool, they liked me, I guess). Not for practice but because I wanted to talk to them. I felt some anxiety, but it did not stop me and it was actually pretty easy to overcome now.

I start to love this "ask for direction" thing. After some approaches I start to feel confident and stop caring that much. And at home I feel good for the complete evening.

Unfortunately, sport came a bit short because of work. So I made a sport at home but it is not the same like running in the forest.



sarahsjourney said:


> Cool thread - keep us posted!


Yes!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 4: Did a field practice again. This time it was not fun, because my mood was very low today. But it was not bad. It is just that my emotions are very unstable with a lot of highs and deep lows. But today I am happy that I did it anyway. Also I found this for my homework:
http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/consumers.cfm
Will do this step by step.


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## harry26 (Dec 4, 2014)

My long term goals of this training are:
To be able to approach everyone for every reason with confidence.This confidence become some harder practice that will some boost the energy.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

harry26 said:


> My long term goals of this training are:
> To be able to approach everyone for every reason with confidence.This confidence become some harder practice that will some boost the energy.


Sorry I am not a native speaker. I did not understand what you want to say?


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Week 3:

I will try to improve my self esteem with this:
http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/infopax.cfm?Info_ID=47
I will call this Improve self esteem ISE, a number(like ISE 2) means the module(so ISE 2 = Improve self esteem module 2).

Every day: Meditation for 20 min

-----------------------------------------
<Sun>
ISE 4 (1,2,3 will already be made at this time, but this has some exercises that takes a few days)

<Mo>
Sport 
Field practice: Ask at least 20 persons for direction.

<Tue>

Sport

<Wed 24.12.14>

<Thu 25.12.14>

<Fr 26.12.14>
ISE 5

<Sat>
Sport
Ask at least 20 persons for direction.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 5: The last days I was pretty down and sad and unmotivated. I had often the feelings that my efforts are pointless, because the though of approaching women is still too much for me. I often felt hopeless.
So in the field practice I only managed to approach 7 people instead of the 20 

I am still not comfortable with asking for directions. But it is really not bad at all. I am rather getting bored by this.

The Sport part was good and I get better  I have the feeling that my body looks better.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 6: In the last week I almost did nothing of the program. However I made a bit of field practice today, asked for directions. It was ok. However after this I had to wait for the train and had a spontaneous idea: So I went to McDonalds and saw that it was full as always, so bought something to eat and sit to some stranger. Ask if it is free so I can sit down, he said yes. Then I asked him if he is also waiting for the train. He said yes and his destination, I responded with "nice", but no conversation. Then he had to go to the train and someone else took his place and I asked him too: "are you waiting for the train." He said yes and a small conversation started. It was very nice and made me really happy.


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## Jonatan (Dec 14, 2014)

I think what you're doing is amazing. I admire your dedication. You are one brave individual. Constantly pushing yourself to do the things you're afraid of. You're an inspiration  I'm definitely going to follow this thread.
Reading through your posts, it seems like you're already making progress! Before you started this, do you think you would have dared to talk to those 2 people in the Mcdonalds?


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Jonatan said:


> I think what you're doing is amazing. I admire your dedication. You are one brave individual. Constantly pushing yourself to do the things you're afraid of. You're an inspiration  I'm definitely going to follow this thread.
> Reading through your posts, it seems like you're already making progress! Before you started this, do you think you would have dared to talk to those 2 people in the Mcdonalds?


Thank you. To be able to approach people like that was part of the goal. But I am surprised how soon I made this, expected this in February.

The reason I can push right now is because I now have a very strong anxiety to miss out on life.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 7:

One important part of my anti SA training schedule is sport. On Sylvester the marathon training schedule I use wanted that I run 10 km as a test. I did not expect to make it, but after 1,5 h I did run 10 km, I know this is slow but for me a huge success.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Week 4:

Every day: Meditation for 20 min
-----------------------------------------
Until Wednesday I have a lot of time, so I want to conclude asking strangers for direction practice by doing it a lot(hope I do not overestimate me). The plan is to ask 100 people for the direction until(including) Tuesday! And conclude every practice by starting a conversation similar to the two conversations I just did(see previous posts). I only need to ask 20 people every day. So if this is done, asking for direction will in future only be "warming up" and not the practice itself anymore.

<Fr>
Field practice: Ask strangers for direction 20
<Sat>
Field practice: Ask strangers for direction 40
<Sun>
Field practice: Ask strangers for direction 60
<Mo>
Field practice: Ask strangers for direction 80
<Tue>
Field practice: Ask strangers for direction 100
<Wed>
Field practice if I did not completely managed to ask 100 people, then I will add some more.


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## CWe (Mar 7, 2010)

Good Luck!

Wish i had your mindset. Too lazy and dumb


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## Neo1234 (Mar 6, 2012)

The Sorrow said:


> Week 4:
> 
> Every day: Meditation for 20 min
> -----------------------------------------
> ...


What type of meditation are you gonna do this week,or the type you usually do?Btw,happy new year to you, and all the very good luck for your future success!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 8:
This week I was really to lazy.
Did not manage to get to 100(too unmotivated), but still approached some people for directions. The anxiety doing this was very low. So I think asking strangers for direction practice is finished. 

There is a older man who often goes on Sunday with his daughter in the same church as me. I wanted to make friends with him for 3 years but was always to afraid to approach him, because I want to hit on his daughter:um. 
Last Sunday I managed to talk to him and now we are friends  (I am not bad at connecting with people, but I am always too scared to make the first move).

In the last week my self esteem got much better as well, because I realized that I am not a total loser.

I will still ask people for directions as a "warm up" for other practices. I feel that asking someone for directions makes me much more confident to do something social. I also made very short conversations in 3 different situations.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

sonny680 said:


> What type of meditation are you gonna do this week,or the type you usually do?Btw,happy new year to you, and all the very good luck for your future success!


I do the same meditation like in the past, the standard stuff you see on the Internet. Funny is that your signature is crashing the page in my chromium browser, but in firefox it still works


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 9:

Today was a crazy day for me. In the past, when I saw someone I barely know, I avoided them and only talked to them if they approached me. But today on my way to church I saw someone I met once and I actually approached him and talked to him without much pain. I did this today two times! Later on my way home I saw a girl around my age at the train station(I had to wait 15 min). She was a bit cute and not intimating, so I looked at her as I do often, but this time I forced myself to make eye contact several times, so she clearly knew that I was looking. It was really exciting and she did not get angry.
Unfortunately, I was too scared to talk, but still it was great!
This all was unplanned, today I was in a great mood.

My schedule for the next week:

Week 5:
Daily mediation 20 min. 
<Mo>
Ask this female coworker how her Christmas was(I often say hello, but not much more)
(Did not see her at all, maybe still on holidays)
<Tue>
Horrible meeting with a professor, I have no choice anyway. (Did it, was unavoidable anyway)
<Wed>
?
<Thu>
?
<Fr>
Field practice: Ask or make a statement to a stranger, that could lead to a conversation, so not asking for direction/time and so on, but something like "Today it is cold" while waiting for the train or so.
<Sat>
?
<Sun>
Free for fun.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

About my motivation:

I am good at being the passive part in a friendship. All my friends did the main effort, I only responded well and only get more active after becoming comfortable. But this did not work with women, I have no good female friends. I don't call or text people unless they do this to me. And so on. But I always wanted to be a more active part and network myself more.

Last year, I found out that a crush(only because I am lonely, I actually don't like her that much) recently got a boyfriend. She did not like me much, because I avoided her, so she was gone. This was really shocking and I realized that I am already ****ing 25 and never had a girlfriend. I cannot life like this anymore! So I asked a other I actually liked, she rejected me. 

Now I have the fear of being lonely for the rest of my life, this fear is much bigger than my SA. :afr So this is pushing me forward!

I also use meditation, nofap(on reddit nofap there is this relapse prevention tool that always shows very motivating stuff, I use it as motivator and not to prevent relapse), play horror games to feel fear and fun together. :afr

I try to put me in an "I love fear and danger" mindset! This is also why I changed my avatar to Darkwing Duck. He is a very motivating hero, because he fails most time, but he keeps trying and trying until he wins.
This is so cool. Now I somehow desire to experience the possibility to fail and to fail and win.

So every time I see something I want to do, but have too much anxiety, I say to myself "Let's get dangerous!" and do it for the sake of danger. Doesn't always work, still avoid some situations. But it gets better, I just have to keep moving forward. :mum


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Today is the end of a long story:
http://www.socialanxietysupport.com...-at-me-after-rejecting-me-1301553/index2.html
Yes I creeped her out, but I regret nothing!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 10: My employer gives every year a small party(people get together and have conversations, not the all get freaking drunk and loose control kind of a party).
I was a bit uneasy but went there, like last year. But usually at such events I only talk to coworkers I am already comfortable, because I had to work with them already.
But this time I saw a girl my age standing alone and I approached her and had a conversation. I was nervous like **** and showed my nervousness very strong. But for some reason I made her laugh a lot and I talked to her and her two female friends for the complete evening. It was much fun. :clap I cannot believe this did actually happened. 

No plan for next week, because University is very demanding, and I don't want any extra obligations, because of my procrastination problem.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

I did not update for quite some time. I did not make any real practice, but a lot of random spontaneous actions that required to overcome my fear.

I joint a church coir(I mean singing if I spelled it wrong), unfortunately no hot girls there. But the music lowers my stress and I meet new people.

I went to a gyros and started a conversation with an old man.(Actually he started talking)

So I got a phone number from a girl I met on an online dating site, but she already knows me from real life(we met once, but I did not take any action. She lives 170 km away), so I freaked out and deleted my profile. But last month I recreated my profile to contact her again. So I managed to get her email address and then her phone number. This all has been very stressful for me, LOL. I did not phone call her yet, but we wrote a lot on whats app, and to contact her causes always a lot of anxiety.

So I have to restart my practices, so for the next week:
Daily: 
1. Meditation 20 min
2. Go up early in the morning (6:30)(I have to much time now and only work after 14:00, so this is a problem I need to overcome. I also have to work on my master thesis, but this I can do this in the evening. But this behavior will hurt when I start to work for real. So I have to create this new habit.)


Goals of this week: 
1. Make this phone call! 
2. Start a conversation with 2 people!

Field practice this work will be to:
1. Warm up: ask some people for direction/time
2. Going to an event people go to socialize. It is the time of Canaveral and this is an easy option to talk to people.

Tue
->Sport
->Field practice

We
->Sport

Thu
-> Talk to a work college I usually don't talk to, who ever this is

Fr
-> Field practice 

Sa
-> Field practice


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## ysn (Feb 7, 2015)

Awesome, man. I love how you donot loose motivation every time you feel low. How do you do it. what keeps you moving? .....I am gonna start a same type of routine this week..


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## slowlyimproving (Jan 2, 2014)

That's great! I like the idea that you're using fear of not having a gf to push you forward. Keep it up! You'll find someone!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

ysn said:


> Awesome, man. I love how you donot loose motivation every time you feel low. How do you do it. what keeps you moving? .....I am gonna start a same type of routine this week..


Thank you.

Avoiding SA provoking situations is the root of being a 25 and never had a girlfriend(or even close). So I just hate avoiding so much now, I realized that avoiding will ruin my life. So when I get in a SA provoking situation, I also get the fear to ruin my life. It is just that I fear avoiding more then humiliation. But keep in mind that I skip around 50%(estimated) of my field practice, but this is still good.



slowlyimproving said:


> That's great! I like the idea that you're using fear of not having a gf to push you forward. Keep it up! You'll find someone!


Thank you. The best part is that this also makes every other part of my life better as well. I am better at work, and I am healthier and ask for help(something I would have never done a half year ago).


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## adam4991 (Mar 27, 2010)

What our doing here man with this training schedule is awesome! Im thinking about adding it to my own routine. Nothing better then having your goals out on paper!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 12:
This week sucked very bad. I got a mean flu, so I was in bed from Thursday until Monday morning. All I made was: I made a situation based statement to a stranger, it did not turn into a conversation but we exchanged some words, it was positive. I made this phone call, was very nice. So the practice part suffered a lot, I also have the feeling that I lost some progress, it feels harder to approach than a few weeks back. I really have to get into consistent practice back. For example I tried this nice canteen, they have good food. On the same table there was a group of people who had a conversation I could have joined, but instead I was quite and antisocial all the time.:| So I want to go to this canteen again and try to join(see schedule below). So the new plan for next week is:

Field practice: Warm up: Ask strangers for direction. Goal: To talk to a human without to hide behind a question(like the question for direction). I mean that I have to say something like a joke or situation based comment, so anything that is more social that asking for directions.

Daily: Meditation 20 min, standing up before 7 o'clock in the morning, cold shower

Goals for the week: 1. a second phone call
2. there are some beggars I see often, I want to ask 3 
what happened, maybe they want to talk

Thu:
Field practice [skipped]

Fr: 
Approach and start conversation with someone( in this church coir I joined) I never talk to.
[did it, but not as great as I wanted to be]

Sa:
Field practice [skipped]

Sun:
Free for fun

Mo: Start conversation with a coworker I never talk to much [failed]

Tu: Field practice [success: I tried to start a conversation with people in the train, but was unable to overcome myself. But at a bus stop I finally managed to talk to this older women and had a nice conversation with her.]

We: Join the conversation of a group in this canteen [Today sucked, I did not get out of bed before 10 AM, so this failed]

Thu: Go to a local to eat where I never eat before [I did it and even said to the one who sells it(he also cook it) that it tasted great(it actually did) and why I liked it. So I had a micro conversation  ]

Fr: Field practice [faced some social anxiety, but failed at starting a conversation]

:um


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## chompers (Feb 3, 2015)

Hey, 

thanks for sharing this , it's really interesting to follow your progress and ups and downs. Don't feel bad if you skip out on some of your schedule - it seems like even doing half of it is a lot!

Also, I like how you explained the darkwing duck motivation. I always liked that he was kind of an underwhelming hero, but the point is that he didn't get discouraged. 

keep the updates coming :clap


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

chompers said:


> Hey,
> 
> thanks for sharing this , it's really interesting to follow your progress and ups and downs. Don't feel bad if you skip out on some of your schedule - it seems like even doing half of it is a lot!
> 
> ...


Thank you, it is very motivating to know someone watches.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 13:

The results are very mixed, I managed to make some conversation with people(mostly older people), but I skipped too much practice. Also sport came too short. However, it showed that I can start a conversation!

So next week is big. There is a event(more like a conference) in my area (06.03.2015 and 07.03.2015) where I could meet a lot of like minded people(and also some girls). This is something I was looking for months, because it is easier to approach people there than on the street(I still cannot approach young women on the street), because there is a lot of socializing going on. I don't feel ready yet, so I hope I can built confidence by a lot of practice this week. 
--------------------------------------------
So the next week:

Field practice: Ask for direction as warm up, start at least one conversation with a stranger

Daily: meditation 20 min, cold shower

Sun: field practice, sport [half fail, I talked to someone but it was more an accident]

Mo: sport, start conversation with a coworker [started conversion with a new coworker I never saw before, and with a familiar coworker I usually don't talk to much]

Tu: Go to a local to eat where I never eat before, field practice[failed at field practice and forgot to eat at a strange place]

We: Try again joining the conversation of a group in this canteen, field practice in the evening[this was very scary for me to even go again to the same table, but this time only very few people came and not at my table, but I said a polite hello to two]

Thu: sport, Go to a local to eat where I never eat before, field practice, [I did go to a place I was once before but feel some anxiety to go there, it was nice][field practice: skipped  ]

Fr: sport, field practice [field practice tried but failed]

Sa: The event I was practicing for!
Sun: The event I was practicing for!
:mum


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## Ressurection (Feb 20, 2015)

What you're doing is the best thing for social anxiety. You're making baby steps to get yourself to ''normal levels''. They teach this in CBT. Keep moving slowly and practicing in small fear situations until you're comfortable to progress into something harder. And after that, keep going until you reach the situations that scare you the most.


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## Mxx1 (Feb 3, 2015)

This is amazing, i'm going to start my own routine too. Love your post  Keep it up!


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Mxx1 said:


> This is amazing, i'm going to start my own routine too. Love your post  Keep it up!


I hope you have success  I wish I started at your age! Don't give up, soon you are 25 like me.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update 14:

The last week was mostly fail, because I was very pessimistic the most time, but I still overcome some anxiety situation  .

On Saturday at the event, I wrote about, I stood in front of the door for a half minute or more because I was to afraid to enter, because of the many people. So I finally entered and waited a bit to get more comfortable. So the result was: I had a conversation with 8 women and started a conversation/approached 2 women  On Sunday I talked with some again but only meet one woman I did not talk to on Saturday. I also talked to some guys but did not count. There have been moments I was full of confidence and sometimes I was very pessimistic. They have been all nice to me. I also did not hit on them but talked to them or approached more in a friendly way.
Of course this was way more easy than approaching for example on the street, because socializing was expected and welcome.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Plan 31.03 - 11.04.15

Because I am not sure when I have time, I set goals this time instead of training schedules:

Only cold shower. Daily meditation for 5 minutes each. 

Asking 10 strangers something(like for directions or time...) 

Starting conversation with 5 strangers.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update: So I basically did this, it was not on the street but in situations where people socialize to make it easier. For the next week (next Sunday to Saturday), I want to ask 10 strangers for direction or so on the street and at least start conversation with 2 people not at a place where people socialize. So for example at MC Donalds or train station or train...


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

I was too unregulary. But in the last week I had a interaction every day. Sometimes only asking for something like direction, but also 4 conversations. My plan now is to talk every day to a stranger, ideal would be a conversation every time, but just asking for direction is good enough, as long as I interact daily.


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## Guitarman100 (Jul 3, 2015)

yeah, but what is nothing happen i she can reach her goals for doing nothing


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Update: So it really payed of I think. Because I had like 4 nice conversations with stranger girls in the train and the last one was really attractive and the conversation very funny. I did not want to ask for numbers because starting a conversation is stress enough. And then also thinking about getting a number would make, that I would not start a conversation in the first place. So I had a strict no number policy. However, I asked a cool girl for number/email at a wedding party after dancing with her(I dance terrible). We also talked a lot 
However this email address she gave me does not exist. But still I am very proud that I had a good not too awkward conversation with a nice woman and went for the number/email.

Funny is that the anxiety at starting the conversation is high, but asking for the number is low.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Hello, I am very stressed because I am job searching but I try to view it as training too because it causes lots of anxiety too, but this is hard and causes a lot of hopelessness and so makes it hard to keep practicing. 

But what is really cool it that when you ask someone for direction and he or she cannot answer because he or she is not from here, this is a great way to start a conversation. I just have to ask where are you from and boom you can have a conversation and show a lot of interest.


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

I am right now searching for a job for some months and it makes me depressed, so that all social interactions suffer and I feel not good enough. The reason is obvious that I didn't apply often enough. But the apply to interview ratio is not bad. But I have to apply more often and with more variety. 

So the goal is to post here daily about my efforts. Goal for today: Apply for 2 jobs online!


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## Sam CY L (Oct 31, 2015)

That's amazing! Please keep up the good work. I think I will start following your training too


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Sorry for the long absence. I found a job. The interviews have been very stressful. Because I have to interact with coworkers now I am exposed socially every day. But I feel like I have become less social, at least in the approaching people part. But I found a girlfriend by online dating. I believe that I have improved a lot, but I am afraid of rejection in non dating things.


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## Ashley SAB (Nov 2, 2016)

The Sorrow said:


> Sorry for the long absence. I found a job. The interviews have been very stressful. Because I have to interact with coworkers now I am exposed socially every day. But I feel like I have become less social, at least in the approaching people part. But I found a girlfriend by online dating. I believe that I have improved a lot, but I am afraid of rejection in non dating things.


Amazing! So what can you do about fearing rejection...


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

Ashley SAB said:


> Amazing! So what can you do about fearing rejection...


I guess making more low level suggestions to other people.


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## Ashley SAB (Nov 2, 2016)

The Sorrow said:


> I guess making more low level suggestions to other people.


Sounds good! Let us know what you do and how it goes! :smile2:

Do you find it fun doing these challenges yet?


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