# Sexual history



## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I'm worried about a potential partner being disappointed when they hear my history, what is too much? What would put a man off?


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

I once heard a guy say that for a girl in her early 20's 4 people is a good number. Of course, I'm at the other end of the spectrum and am embarrassed of my lack of experience, so I'm not really sure why someone would be embarrassed about multiple partners. If a guy wants you I don't think he'll care if your count is somewhat "high."


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

I am at the other end of the spectrum, with no experience whatsoever.

I would just lie about it. That's what I'm going to do. Either that, or not reveal too much information.


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## Tania I (Jul 22, 2012)

You have no obligation to give too much information -_-
If a guy gets a girl, that's all he needs actually. The other will only be bonuses.
STDs are definitely a put off. Other than that, it depends.


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

When i say sexually history im talking about everything you can do.... My number is above 5 below 10 im nearly 26. It isnt embarassment i'd prefer less partners.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> When i say sexually history im talking about everything you can do.... My number is above 5 below 10 im nearly 26. It isnt embarassment i'd prefer less partners.


That's pretty normal for the typical 26 year old woman.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

As long as its not like 40 guys in 6 years, I'm fine. I'm more concerned about her previous relationships than her sex life. If she has a history of cheating on guys, or breaking up with someone and getting into a new relationship three days later, then I'd be a little concerned.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

EternallyRestless said:


> I once heard a guy say that for a girl in her early 20's 4 people is a good number. Of course, I'm at the other end of the spectrum and am embarrassed of my lack of experience, so I'm not really sure why someone would be embarrassed about multiple partners. If a guy wants you I don't think he'll care if your count is somewhat "high."


Lol, I'm out. I really don't care about my number...I stopped counting anyways. If someone is gonna judge you cause you have a "high" number then **** them! They're not worth it. I don't think past matters.


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## Schizoidas (May 11, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> what is too much? What would put a man off?


3 sounds cute. Anything above 3 makes you ..

I don't care if they're all from relationships either, if a girl has had too many failed relationships, then I wouldn't be interested.


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## sorrwel (May 20, 2012)

Haha well any worthwhile man won't be 'put off' by your number of past sexual partners. That's ridiculous.


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## ewebpedia (Sep 3, 2012)

What matters for me is her rate of success on other relationship apart of love making. If she has troubled relationship with other close people in her life, then staying far from her is the best option!!


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

Do people actually ask how many partners you girls have had?

I don't think I have ever brought that conversation up once.



Schizoidas said:


> 3 sounds cute. Anything above 3 makes you ..
> 
> I don't care if they're all from relationships either, if a girl has had too many failed relationships, then I wouldn't be interested.


Why would 3 be any different than 5?


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

I once had a guy ask me how many sessions I have had I was 18/19 at the time. I'm quite intrusive when it comes to sexual history. Luckily the last guy had absolutely 0 and I LOVED it! If we are on about full sexual intercourse my number is low.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Canucklehead said:


> Do people actually ask how many partners you girls have had?
> 
> I don't think I have ever brought that conversation up once.


No one has ever asked me that. Out of the 10 dudes not one. Counting I guess short term relationships.


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## Schizoidas (May 11, 2012)

Canucklehead said:


> Why would 3 be any different than 5?


1 - 2 failed relationships could probably be explained but if the girl in question has had more than that, then chances are the problem is the girl.


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## Ben Williams (Sep 9, 2012)

i can promise you that in a lot of cases if a guy get's pissed at you having a high number of previous partners it will be an ego problem, no surprise there, i just mean there will be the feelings of wondering if they match up to the people you've been with, sexual intimidation and so on. 
I can kind've say this from experience, not that i would think less of the girl because i think i've progressed past that stage but my low self esteem would make me feel inferior i guess. I might sound like a douche, not the best at articulating ideas that i get ill probably think later, dammit i shouldve said "...." instead, but this is a hard thing for me to admit and i suppose that's why im here, to work on the self esteem thing.
So im not saying a douche bag response you might get from a guy when asked that question is excuseable ladies im not saying be ok with it, but surely you can to some degree understand it would be out of anxiety and self worth issues, which i think alot of us here can relate to


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

WintersTale said:


> I am at the other end of the spectrum, with no experience whatsoever.
> 
> I would just lie about it. That's what I'm going to do. Either that, or not reveal too much information.


I don't have any experience either. I'm going to do the same and just lie about it.


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

don't lie, most people will like that you don't have any experience


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> don't lie, most people will like that you don't have any experience


No they won't.

Countless women say they don't want to be a teacher.

On top of that a lot of previous partners kinda turn women on: it means the guy is considered highly desirable by female peers. It gives him a higher social standing.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

I don't have any experience at all. I've have never kissed a girl or done anything.


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

But someone has to know what one should do...


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Frankly, I don't care.

I would even date a porn star, if A.) she had been tested for STDs, and was clean, and B.) she had left the business for good, and wanted to be a family woman.

That being stated, I sincerely doubt any porn star would come out and admit it, unless it was clearly obvious. For the same reason, no virgin would actually admit that they were a virgin before they lost their virginity, unless they were a friggin' idiot.


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

WintersTale said:


> That being stated, I sincerely doubt any porn star would come out and admit it, unless it was clearly obvious. For the same reason, no virgin would actually admit that they were a virgin before they lost their virginity, unless they were a friggin' idiot.


I disagree with that, sure some women might find it weird that you are a virgin, but a good number of women would find it endearing in some way.

The worst thing I ever did was tell my ex girlfriend that I wasn't a virgin when we first got together. Never start a relationship out with lies. It will always come back to bite you eventually.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Would they admit they've never had a girlfriend or even kissed before. That's what I feel more ashamed of.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Canucklehead said:


> I disagree with that, sure some women might find it weird that you are a virgin, but a good number of women would find it endearing in some way.
> 
> The worst thing I ever did was tell my ex girlfriend that I wasn't a virgin when we first got together. Never start a relationship out with lies. It will always come back to bite you eventually.


I think I will just stay mum on the issue. When she starts talking about sexual experience, I will sidestep the issue.

Really, anybody who cares that much about sexual experience isn't worth dating. The only two people that should matter in a current relationship is the boy and girl (or boy/boy, or girl/girl, if they are gay.) Nothing else matters.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

I could easily say that I lost my virginity years ago. I've often thought how it would be if I kissed someone. I would hope that I wouldn't be terrible but I don't know how I would be.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Virginity at 30 is ALWAYS weird.

Now does that mean every person weirded out by your virginity shall reject you? Not necessarily.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

It's never too late, Ravens.

A previous acquaintance of mine was a 39 year old virgin. He lost it a few months before his 40th birthday, and he lost his kissing virginity, too (he had never kissed anyone before.)

Last I heard, he was married to the woman, and they were expecting a child.


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

my ex hadnt kissed anyone or done anything i didnt think much of it other than i didnt know what he was doing with his time if he wasnt having romantic relationships.


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

Also, a guy that is a virgin will probably be much more appreciative of the fact that you are giving him sexual companionship, and is more likely to remain faithful.

Chances are he will fall head over heels in love with you too. Once they've done it a few times, the magic trick doesn't work quite as well.

I know I'm making a bunch of generalizations here, but whatever.


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Canucklehead said:


> Also, a guy that is a virgin will probably be much more appreciative of the fact that you are giving him sexual companionship, and is more likely to remain faithful.
> 
> Chances are he will fall head over heels in love with you too. Once they've done it a few times, the magic trick doesn't work quite as well.
> 
> I know I'm making a bunch of generalizations here, but whatever.


yes that is a generalization, if you check my posts you will see that I expected my ex to fall head over heels due to his virginity getting taken by me, but he didn't he was still into porn when i would of expected him to forget all about it. Through out the whole relationship i never got a dirty text from him, only at the beginning and there wasn't many of them.


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

TPower said:


> No they won't.
> 
> Countless women say they don't want to be a teacher.
> 
> On top of that a lot of previous partners kinda turn women on: it means the guy is considered highly desirable by female peers. It gives him a higher social standing.


Not me, I like inexperience, once had a guy tell me he could take a bra off with one hand, I didn't like that. There are things I've done that men won't like, not threesomes but other things. Nobody decent will accept me.


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Not me, I like inexperience, once had a guy tell me he could take a bra off with one hand, I didn't like that. *There are things I've done that men won't like, not threesomes but other things. Nobody decent will accept me.*


Like what? I'm sure it couldn't be that bad.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

WintersTale said:


> It's never too late, Ravens.
> 
> A previous acquaintance of mine was a 39 year old virgin. He lost it a few months before his 40th birthday, and he lost his kissing virginity, too (he had never kissed anyone before.)
> 
> Last I heard, he was married to the woman, and they were expecting a child.


Sometimes it feels like it's too late. I've been thinking that since I don't have a job anymore that I won't find someone that will want me. It's not just that though. My anxiety seems to be getting worse. Yesterday I thought about telling someone that works at a pharmacy that I like her and I almost had a panic attack last night. My whole body felt like it was on fire and my heart was racing. I also felt dizzy and I felt sick to my stomach.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> yes that is a generalization, if you check my posts you will see that I expected my ex to fall head over heels due to his virginity getting taken by me, but he didn't he was still into porn when i would of expected him to forget all about it. Through out the whole relationship i never got a dirty text from him, only at the beginning and there wasn't many of them.


How can you expect anybody to forget porn? What's wrong with porn?


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

WintersTale said:


> How can you expect anybody to forget porn? What's wrong with porn?


it might be because i wasnt expecting it from him i built him up in my mind as a prince who would save me.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I would just lie or not talk about it period. Beyond a certain age no one asks. They don't want to know.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

I'm only a year older than you and I have more partners. I don't care. The number of sexual partners doesn't determine how good of a girlfriend (or boyfriend) you are.


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## bg09 (Aug 14, 2012)

Jigirk said:


> I'd be put off a little maybe if she said she'd had 50 previous lovers.


lol, this
but i wouldnt ask, ignorance is bliss i guess


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

i think you have to ask some questions though, i'd be put off by one night stands or casual flings (which i havent had)


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## Zeeshan (Sep 4, 2011)

ravens said:


> I could easily say that I lost my virginity years ago. I've often thought how it would be if I kissed someone. I would hope that I wouldn't be terrible but I don't know how I would be.


Listen bro, believe me when i tell you this

KISSING IS EASY

infact its so easy, that you dont need to know how to do it. Its the same as a peck on the cheek, except you dont pucker. You softly wrap your lips around either the top or her bottom lip, and leave it there for a bit.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Zeeshan said:


> Listen bro, believe me when i tell you this
> 
> KISSING IS EASY
> 
> infact its so easy, that you dont need to know how to do it. Its the same as a peck on the cheek, except you dont pucker. You softly wrap your lips around either the top or her bottom lip, and leave it there for a bit.


Maybe it is easy but I'm not going to find someone to ever kiss. I'm 41 ****ing years old you would have thought that it would have happened by now.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Personally, this is why I think a person should keep certain skeletons in the closet, I would never ask a girl her number because I know I'll probably leave because I know the number would probably be more than she's putting out there. I wouldn't want to get with the neighborhood pump. It's too much responsibility trying to turn a.........into a housewife.:stu I'm not calling you one though.


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## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

Your numbers don't seem abnormal.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> Personally, this is why I think a person should keep certain skeletons in the closet, I would never ask a girl her number because I know I'll probably leave because I know the number would probably be more than she's putting out there. I wouldn't want to get with the neighborhood pump. It's too much responsibility trying to turn a.........into a housewife.:stu I'm not calling you one though.


So what number qualifies a woman as a "....." ? is the number for men different? I hate the term "neighborhood pump", it's ****ing objectifying to women who enjoy casual sex.

And seriously? _turn someone into a housewife_? Not how it works, pal:roll

also, this:


phoenixwright said:


> The number of sexual partners doesn't determine how good of a girlfriend (or boyfriend) you are.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


> So what number qualifies a woman as a "....." ? is the number for men different? I hate the term "neighborhood pump", it's ****ing objectifying to women who enjoy casual sex.
> 
> And seriously? _turn someone into a housewife_? Not how it works, pal:roll
> 
> also, this:


well if that's what they are, they are. I don't know about men, but they have different set of rules. Honestly I hate to bring up the "double standard" but men have to lie cheat and steal to get a little, women, not so much, anyway, again if she's the neighborhood pump, then she is, I wouldn't want to the responsibility of committing to a woman like that, I have some fun but I wouldn't want to be seen holding hands, and buying gifts, when other dudes didn't have to.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> well if that's what they are, they are. I don't know about men, but they have different set of rules. Honestly I hate to bring up the "double standard" but men have to lie cheat and steal to get a little, women, not so much, anyway


Could you please explain, using logic, how:

A person who can get sex relatively easily is morally wrong and less of a human being for having it with many people. Meanwhile, a person who cannot get it as easily can have sex as much as he wants (using deceptive methods as you are suggesting, on top of it), and is not judged negatively.

Oh that's right, you can't, and only a gross misogynist would agree with the crap you're spewing. :roll


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

meeps said:


> A person who can get sex relatively easily is morally wrong and less of a human being for having it with many people. Meanwhile, a person who cannot get it as easily can have sex as much as he wants (using deceptive methods as you are suggesting, on top of it), and is not judged negatively.












I can't speak for the guy, but I don't think that's what he was saying.

Look, women aren't morally wrong or less of a human for sleeping with a lot of guys. But acting like a woman having sex with a lot of guys and guy having sex with a lot of women is the same thing is simply not true. And acknowledging that there is a difference is not misogyny and it's not **** shaming.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

Peter Attis said:


> I can't speak for the guy, but I don't think that's what he was saying.
> 
> Look, women aren't morally wrong or less of a human for sleeping with a lot of guys.


"neighborhood pump" =dehumanizing, objectifying someone because of their sexuality. It's not exactly a flattering term, I'm not sure how you could interpret that any other way.



Peter Attis said:


> But acting like a woman having sex with a lot of guys and guy having sex with a lot of women is the same thing is simply not true.


Could you explain the difference?


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## Schizoidas (May 11, 2012)

Peter Attis said:


> But acting like a woman having sex with a lot of guys and guy having sex with a lot of women is the same thing is simply not true. And acknowledging that there is a difference is not misogyny and it's not **** shaming.


Lol dude, you shot yourself in the foot there. Don't ever compare a woman's sexuality to a man's, there is no need. When you're talking about these things just leave men out of it. You're not interested in men, so that's why there is no need to take an interest in their "sexual history" or even talk about them


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## pineapplebun (Oct 25, 2011)

TPower said:


> No they won't.
> 
> Countless women say they don't want to be a teacher.
> 
> On top of that a lot of previous partners kinda turn women on: it means the guy is considered highly desirable by female peers. It gives him a higher social standing.


I don't agree. I would be more likely to be put off by someone who has been with many previous partners, especially if they were a series of flights/short-term relationships. I would wonder if a) his mentality has changed since then and he's finally ready to settle down into a serious relationship or if he's still promiscuous. If he is promiscuous then that's fine, but he's not for me. *Actually, a guy who is a virgin would be seen as endearing to me.

b)if he has had MANY relationships, why did so many of his previous relationships fail? Were they mutual break ups, or he always got dumped or he's always breaking hearts. The only constant is HIM. It wouldn't show me that he's highly desirable, more like the complete opposite - that once women get to know him, they realized he SUCKS. Therefore he's actually highly undesirable. Some people are just great to know on a superficial level, but deeper level, nty (abusers for example). Or, perhaps he has commitment issues? Or he just goes for the wrong type of girl consistently and doesn't learn his lesson.

But back on topic: Um between 5-10 is okay I guess. I don't think most men would mind that and think that's pretty normal.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

meeps said:


> Could you explain the difference?


No. Figure it out.


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## 87wayz (Jul 5, 2012)

I think most women usually lie about this. Women have access to a sexually obsessed male population thus their experience or inexperience can be correlated to their restraint. Ever been to a buffet?

Usually women who were real nasty in college lie to their long term love interest to preserve their ego. We know you banged the Detroit Pistons that one time in LA, but tell us it was just 3 to 5 dudes so we don't imagine too much. Like, if you banged enough dudes to be a starting line up and bench + the coach, we don't want to think about your whole congregation of past ****s hoopin at the Palace.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


> Could you please explain, using logic, how:
> 
> A person who can get sex relatively easily is morally wrong and less of a human being for having it with many people. Meanwhile, a person who cannot get it as easily can have sex as much as he wants (using deceptive methods as you are suggesting, on top of it), and is not judged negatively.
> 
> Oh that's right, you can't, and only a gross misogynist would agree with the crap you're spewing. :roll


Again, I don't want to "tame" the dragon. Call it misogynist all you want, I personally do not want a woman who gives it up to everyone. It's kind like a dude who has a little to no relationships a lot women, not all will look at him like something is wrong "nobody wants him so he must not be "special". On the flipside of that coin a woman that has been around the "block" quite a bit *some men* like myself will not find her special if she has been with everyone else.


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## MaxPower (May 1, 2012)

Wasn't this question asked before?:sus I don't care if she have no history or one that goes into the hundreds that is really none of my business, that said, I would think it's very sweet if she chose me to be her first.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

The only people that care about your sexual history are your 'friends' that are free with the term '****'. Guys won't really care how many men or women a woman has been with.

Personally I would prefer a woman to know what she's doing in bed because a cute face and a sexy body can't get boring under the sheets.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

Peter Attis said:


> No. Figure it out.


one has a penis, another has a vagina. :roll
I wonder what's holding you back from explaining yourself.


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## Tryhard (Sep 5, 2012)

OK, tbh, I would prefer that a girl had less sexual partners (but that's just due to my own insecurities as a virgin). If she had been with a lot of guys, I would probably be angry/jealous about it.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

meganmila said:


> Lol, I'm out. I really don't care about my number...I stopped counting anyways. If someone is gonna judge you cause you have a "high" number then **** them! They're not worth it. I don't think past matters.





sorrwel said:


> Haha well any worthwhile man won't be 'put off' by your number of past sexual partners. That's ridiculous.


You girls seem cool. Let's start a club together. I'm not even being sarcastic.



Canucklehead said:


> Do people actually ask how many partners you girls have had?
> 
> I don't think I have ever brought that conversation up once.
> 
> Why would 3 be any different than 5?


Because it's cute! Duh. :lol

I wonder why, because I know some people do ask, someone would want to know that. What conclusions could you form from that number? You want to impose a social generalization on your GF? See if she's the "neighborhood pump?" :sus



Lonelygirl1986 said:


> I once had a guy ask me how many sessions I have had I was 18/19 at the time. I'm quite intrusive when it comes to sexual history. Luckily the last guy had absolutely 0 and I LOVED it! If we are on about full sexual intercourse my number is low.


You seem to be quite judgmental about the number of partner the other person has, so why are you asking if others would be? Answer what would be a high number in your opinion, and there's your answer.



Peter Attis said:


> No. Figure it out.


Oh, ok. This answers everything. Basically, meeps, what he's trying to say is that there is no difference and he doesn't know how to make one up.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Omg...I don't know why certain people in here think women can't enjoy them selves sexually. I just don't get it. I just really hate the idea that to some people having sex with multiple men is not worthwhile. So do you expect your girl to be pure and innocent or what. I dunno why I just read the other responses it just makes my blood boil. 

I just.....can't. I can't even fully express myself without being sent a warning or something ugh lord. I just hope the guys in here that do think that find a very close minded girl too. 

I wonder what I said would be attacking.:roll


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

AllToAll said:


> Oh, ok. This answers everything. Basically, meeps, what he's trying to say is that there is no difference and he doesn't know how to make one up.


Wow, you honestly believe that? :lol

I'd love to know what world you live in. Let me guess, you also think Affirmative Action is racist towards all white people, right?


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## leave me alone (Apr 1, 2011)

The numbers don't make you a *****. The circumstances does.

Kind of ridicolous saying that anything above 3 makes the girl ****ty. Too many failed relationships doesn't necessarily mean it was her fault either.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

Peter Attis said:


> Wow, you honestly believe that? :lol
> 
> I'd love to know what world you live in. Let me guess, you also think Affirmative Action is racist towards all white people, right?


Yes, I do believe there is no difference between a man who has casual and a woman.
And no, I don't think affirmative action is "racist towards whites." I fail to see how that's at all related, though.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

I see where this is going.

You're gonna play willfully obtuse to try to bait me into an argument, so that when I actually answer it, I get called the dreaded "M"-word. 

Not falling for it.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

Peter Attis said:


> I see where this is going.
> 
> You're gonna play willfully obtuse to try to bait me into an argument, so that when I actually answer it, I get called the dreaded "M"-word.
> 
> Not falling for it.


My intentions are clear. I'm not making any pretenses. You've already stated your opinion, and I already poked at it, but you're trying to make your opinions fact when they're far from it.

Tell us, why don't you, what is the difference between a woman having casual sex and a man? Amuse me.


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## elvin jones (Dec 12, 2011)

Just don't tell him. Problem solved.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Judging by the number of men who watch porn, I'd say 99% of the male population would be open to sleeping with a girl who has had lots of sex, just to notch it on their post.

Whether or not they _would start a relationship with someone like that_, however, is open to interpretation. Somehow I disbelieve that a man would want to commit to someone who wasn't committed.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

AllToAll said:


> My intentions are clear. I'm not making any pretenses. You've already stated your opinion, and I already poked at it, but you're trying to make your opinions fact when they're far from it.
> 
> Tell us, why don't you, what is the difference between a woman having casual sex and a man? Amuse me.


I am vehemently against the double standard. It has been my observation that women who are open to casual sex _*generally*_ tend to be *****es though. That is why "tart with a heart" or "hooker with a heart of gold" is a character archetype in fiction. The archetype suggests that it's unusual for a sexually promiscuous woman to be a nice person. Sexually promiscuous women are often cruel towards men who don't make the standard. Whereas a typical girl may not be because she doesn't want to be thought of as a *****. Since women are socially conditioned to be nice (but in the days of Sex and the City, a lot of women are embracing *****hood).

On 4chan, I saw a screen-cap of some woman publicly humiliating her ex-boyfriend on Facebook post-breakup. Saying that he was a child who needed to be babysat 24/7. Then when he lost his temper at her for airing out dirty laundry in public like that and calling her a *****, she talked about his premature ejaculation problem on Facebook for the whole world to see. Women who have casual sex *generally* tend to be like that girl.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

phoenixwright said:


> I am vehemently against the double standard. It has been my observation that women who are open to casual sex _*generally*_ tend to be *****es though. That is why "tart with a heart" or "hooker with a heart of gold" is a character archetype in fiction. The archetype suggests that it's unusual for a sexually promiscuous woman to be a nice person.


I'll take your "observation" with a grain of salt.

BTW, that entertainment trope doesn't stem from your observation. "Hookers with a heart of gold" usually don't like what they're doing, and have a rough personal history (i.e. isolated, abused, etc.). It stems from the idea that any woman who expresses sexual desire is somehow damaged.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

AllToAll said:


> I'll take your "observation" with a grain of salt.
> 
> BTW, that entertainment trope doesn't stem from your observation. "Hookers with a heart of gold" usually don't like what they're doing, and have a rough personal history (i.e. isolated, abused, etc.). It stems from the idea that any woman who expresses sexual desire is somehow damaged.


You take my observation with a grain of salt because you are biased and don't see things from the lense of a man. On hookup sites, a lot of the women on ads there come off like *****es. "You must be ripped." (when the woman is overweight. lol) "You must have a 8"+ thick penis." And then ridiculing men who don't last long enough or who have ED problems. When she might not even be anything to write home about. I'd bet that the majority of women who have casual sex are morally bankrupt and self-centered. That does not mean that having casual sex automatically makes you morally bankrupt and self-centered. But these are traits that tend to go together.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

phoenixwright said:


> You take my observation with a grain of salt because you are biased and don't see things from the lense of a man. On hookup sites, a lot of the women on ads there come off like *****es. "You must be ripped." (when the woman is overweight. lol) "You must have a 8"+ thick penis." And then ridiculing men who don't last long enough or who have ED problems. When she might not even be anything to write home about. I'd bet that the majority of women who have casual sex are morally bankrupt and self-centered. That does not mean that having casual sex automatically makes you morally bankrupt and self-centered. But these are traits that tend to go together.


Ooh, from dating sites. Yes, again, I will take your observation with a tiny grain of salt. 
I may not know what it's like to be a man in the online dating world, but even better, I'm a woman who knows women who enjoy casual sex. Eureka!

You are foolish to think that dating websites are accurate descriptions of people. Then again, I guess the truth finally comes out. The man who says "I'm vehemently against the stereotype" now changes his mind and says they are "morally bankrupt." How about if you come down from that pedestal. Are you not the guy who visits prostitutes? I mean if we're talking about morals here... :roll I guess it's okay for you to enjoy sex and **** women, but god forbid they have their own standards. You judge women, too. You may be less rigid with whom you'll have sex with, but you're judging/mocking these women as well (fat/ugly/old-some info I've gathered from previous posts of yours).

Your latter comment, well, it just throws everything you've said out the window. At this point I don't even think you know what you believe. Is it women, men, or everyone who enjoys casual sex who's morally bankrupt?


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

AllToAll said:


> Ooh, from dating sites. Yes, again, I will take your observation with a tiny grain of salt.
> I may not know what it's like to be a man in the online dating world, but even better, I'm a woman who knows women who enjoy casual sex. Eureka!
> 
> You are foolish to think that dating websites are accurate descriptions of people. Then again, I guess the truth finally comes out. The man who says "I'm vehemently against the stereotype" now changes his mind and says they are "morally bankrupt." How about if you come down from that pedestal. Are you not the guy who visits prostitutes? I mean if we're talking about morals here... :roll I guess it's okay for you to enjoy sex and **** women, but god forbid they have their own standards. You judge women, too. You may be less rigid with whom you'll have sex with, but you're judging/mocking these women as well (fat/ugly/old-some info I've gathered from previous posts of yours).
> ...


It's ok for women to have casual sex. I have never said anything different. I just said that women who have casual sex generally tend to be *****es and have morally corrupt qualities. And not just girls you see online. But also in "real life". That does not mean all of them are like that. Can't you read? Apparently not.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

Would be after someone whos 20-30 and slept with less than 5, have been a good judge of character and thankfully the majority of girlfriends have come into that statistic.

If shes the sort though to openly talk about how many guys shes been with, she aint for me


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

pete24 said:


> Would be after someone whos 20-30 and slept with less than 5, have been a good judge of character and thankfully the majority of girlfriends have come into that statistic.
> 
> If shes the sort though to openly talk about how many guys shes been with, she aint for me


Haven't you been with over 12 women and you have a child, right?


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

phoenixwright said:


> It's ok for women to have casual sex. I have never said anything different. I just said that women who have casual sex generally tend to be *****es and have morally corrupt qualities. And not just girls you see online. But also in "real life". That does not mean all of them are like that. Can't you read? Apparently not.


You're not the law, so obviously it's okay for women to have casual sex if they wish to. That was never my argument anyways. My argument was that you can't judge/deduce certain characteristics from women by whether or not they've had more than *insert arbitrary number* sexual partners. You so gallantly contributed with self-centered and *****y. Oh, and fat, too. Right after posting you were "vehemently" against the double standard. You're okay with judging women who enjoy casual sex, but men who do vary.

See how well I read? Nice try, though. I was just almost insulted. Give it another shot on your next post.


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

Most girls I've dated (ages range from 20-26) have slept with anywhere from 5 to 15 guys. I do ask. Not because I want to check whether or not they're the neighborhood pump, but rather it's an interesting topic and if I were to seriously consider them as relationship material I would want to transition into talking about cheating history, length of relationships, one-night stands, etc. I am all about openness and honesty so if they can talk about that stuff they can talk about anything, and in that regard it's a huge trust-builder.

Now that I've dated around a bit, number doesn't really matter to me. People go crazy in college, but that doesn't mean they are promiscuous or cheaters so who cares? THAT BEING SAID, I would say anything over 15-20 sex partners for a girl in that age range would turn me off. Why? I don't know, it just would. It would just be harder to consider them relationship material. Maybe I just see my ideal woman/future wife as someone who is a little bit more picky than that.


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## HustleRose (Jun 19, 2009)

If the person matters, they won't judge you fully based on "your number."

Personally, I think I'd feel a bit iffy about the guy if he had been with more than 10 girls. This doesn't mean I wouldn't date him, but, like rymo said, I'd wonder if they were really relationship material. I'd like to know under which circumstances he slept with the girls, too. If just to know more about him. Maybe I'd get some funny stories out of it, too.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

komorikun said:


> Haven't you been with over 12 women and you have a child, right?


15, and yep a kid I dont see (not down to my fault, she was controlling, intentionally came off pill behind my back thinking having a kid would bring us together... It didnt, and once id found a new gf, she hated it, didnt put me on birth cert, had blocked every form of contact... and she already lived far away but moved to a new flat. When I last spoke to her 2 months back (before she blocked me on fb), she said that she going to wait til the kids 16, tell her about me n then let her make her mind up... but im sure I may of mentioned that before.

But anyways back on topic...

The reason I say im after a women that has had such few numbers is because I know the more people sleep with, the more insecurity's they can potentially gain (unless they are a slag and slept with high 15+ amounts of people over a short space of time... and that isnt the type I go for). Im getting past the stage of being with someone where there is a bigger risk of insecurity's ruining things, its a waste of time so im minimising risks.

Yes iv slept with that many, but apart from 1, 1 night stand the rest have been in relationships (or times when a relationship could of formed but we decided it wasnt for the best), every relationship that ended just didnt work out and I gained no insecurity's from them.... There could be women like me but id rather go for the safer option and not take the risk


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

pete24 said:


> 15, and yep a kid I dont see (not down to my fault, she was controlling, intentionally came off pill behind my back thinking having a kid would bring us together... It didnt, and once id found a new gf, she hated it, didnt put me on birth cert, had blocked every form of contact... and she already lived far away but moved to a new flat. When I last spoke to her 2 months back (before she blocked me on fb), she said that she going to wait til the kids 16, tell her about me n then let her make her mind up... but im sure I may of mentioned that before.
> 
> But anyways back on topic...
> 
> ...


I thought you had gained insecurities seeing as all but one dumped you. You don't wonder why that happened in almost all your relationships? I think most women would wonder why that happened too before dating you.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

komorikun said:


> I thought you had gained insecurities seeing as all but one dumped you. You don't wonder why that happened in almost all your relationship? *I think most women would wonder why that happened too before dating you*.


Exactly.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Yes us promiscuous women are evil *****es hehheehe. You know if a guy is gonna use me for sex why can't I do the same. I actually liked using him.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

AllToAll said:


> You're not the law, so obviously it's okay for women to have casual sex if they wish to. That was never my argument anyways. My argument was that you could judge/deduce certain characteristics from women by whether or not they've had more than *insert arbitrary number* sexual partners. You so gallantly contributed with self-centered and *****y. Oh, and fat, too. Right after posting you were "vehemently" against the double standard. You're okay with judging women who enjoy casual sex, but men who do vary.
> 
> See how well I read? Nice try, though. I was just almost insulted. Give it another shot on your next post.


I don't rule out a girl just because she has casual sex or assume things about her right away. I am more on guard yes. And part of it too is that I don't want to jump into bed with a girl until I know she has integrity, trustworthiness, etc. And so many girls that would be willing to jump into bed with a guy quickly lack those characteristics and just hooking up with a girl on the first night is risky because of that because you don't know her that well at that point.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

Look, nobody's saying there's anything wrong with a girl who enjoys casual sex. But if she wants a high-five or a pat on the back for boning a bunch of dudes at a party, she's not gonna get it. 

I know here in SAS-land, men and women are 100% equal and face the exact same experiences the exact same ways, but outside of the confines of this forum, they're not.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

WintersTale said:


> Judging by the number of men who watch porn, I'd say 99% of the male population would be open to sleeping with a girl who has had lots of sex, just to notch it on their post.
> 
> Whether or not they _would start a relationship with someone like that_, however, is open to interpretation. Somehow I disbelieve that a man would want to commit to someone who wasn't committed.


This.

If a girl has been with a hundred guys before, why should I think she would stop and have a committed relationship with me? It's more likely she will move on to guy #101 shortly.


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## Insider (Sep 17, 2012)

I'm worried that no girl will ever want to be with me when she finds out I'm a virgin with no experience at 21.


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## QuietandShy (May 26, 2011)

My number is up there but guess what? I would never tell a potential boyfriend that. They wouldn't like it and it's none of their business anyways, if they do ask, just say the number of boyfriends you've had. even if you have actually had more sexual partners. Like for me I would say 3 because I have had 3 boyfriends...but sexual partners I have had more. As long as you are clear for stds then it doesn't matter that is all in the past.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

arnie said:


> This.
> 
> If a girl has been with a hundred guys before, why should I think she would stop and have a committed relationship with me? It's more likely she will move on to guy #101 shortly.


Because it's hard to find a man you are attracted to that likes you too. One night stands are easy to find and men that want that are a dime a dozen. Having a boyfriend is much better in many ways. Better sex, companionship, support, etc. That's what makes it special.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

AllToAll said:


> My intentions are clear. I'm not making any pretenses. You've already stated your opinion, and I already poked at it, but you're trying to make your opinions fact when they're far from it.
> 
> Tell us, why don't you, what is the difference between a woman having casual sex and a man? Amuse me.


I'll try and make you laugh, one has to work(spend money) to get some. The other one doesn't. Yes, I am a board certified misogynist/woman hater/pig.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> I'll try and make you laugh, one has to work(spend money) to get some. The other one doesn't. Yes, I am a board certified misogynist/woman hater/pig.


Women are more selective about who they grant access to their port and men give it out like candy. Women then leverage the demand advantage they have to either extract resources out of men if they can or bed down a guy who is above her level (hypergamy). Due to the laws of supply/demand, what do you expect? We're looking at this whole thing at a micro level. On a more broad, macro level, humans are selfish and we are moving towards an increasingly capitalistic, materialist society. We are seeing the decline of community. If you hop onto a bus/subway/metro/whatever, everyone is on their mobile phone. We are seeing social decline, the decline of family, etc. Corporations don't give a **** about the social impact they have on people. You are disposable to them.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

I think men have the right to be picky too...I don't think all of them give it out easily.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

komorikun said:


> I thought you had gained insecurities seeing as all but one dumped you. You don't wonder why that happened in almost all your relationships? I think most women would wonder why that happened too before dating you.


I hadnt, your right though, all but 1 did dump me. Im 26 now but going back to my first relationship around 18. Because I hadnt been with anyone before that I doubted my looks, lowered my standard, which meant I wasnt happy deep down with the girl I was with and it got to the bored stage. Due to SA I didnt end it because with very few friends id feel id be entering a life on my own. Of course because subconsciously I couldnt help but act bored they decided it wasnt working and ended it for me.

As time went on I realised I was going wrong by downgrading myself, getting in relationships with almost anyone that showed a bit on interest, but then with my current x its where I realised my potential, she was the perfect girl for me... and it ended... why?? Not through anything I had done, not through my own fault (to the last day of seeing each other, we had perfect times), but because she was a virgin before meeting me and got to a point where she realised she needs to enjoy more of the single life, experience more guys than just me for the rest of her life, so it was always going to be that way.

I hadnt gained issues from it, but im not over her 3 months on, and it has allowed me to realise my potential. I wont be looking to date properly until im over her.

I can see your point, women may wonder why iv been in so many relationships that have ended, and fair enough if its a concern of theirs and they dont want to be with me.

However im at the point in life where I just want my next relationship...whenever im ready for it to have the best chance. You dont know about peoples issues until later on in a relationship, so I dont want to risk the chance of getting with someone who has been around more which has increased their chance of issues only to find out about them after a wasted 6 months or a year together


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meganmila said:


> I think men have the right to be picky too...I don't think all of them give it out easily.


lol, most men don't have a choice(only the hot/rich ones get to pick and choose), they have to take whatever they can get. Myself included, beggars and can't be choosers. :lol


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

phoenixwright said:


> Women are more selective about who they grant access to their port and men give it out like candy. Women then leverage the demand advantage they have to either extract resources out of men if they can or bed down a guy who is above her level (hypergamy). Due to the laws of supply/demand, what do you expect? We're looking at this whole thing at a micro level. On a more broad, macro level, humans are selfish and we are moving towards an increasingly capitalistic, materialist society. We are seeing the decline of community. If you hop onto a bus/subway/metro/whatever, everyone is on their mobile phone. We are seeing social decline, the decline of family, etc. Corporations don't give a **** about the social impact they have on people. You are disposable to them.


I'm just glad there is a woman here who is *HONEST* about the differences. At least you admit it, you'd be surprised how many debates I get into about the "playing field"(these other women swear that it's equal). It's not equal at all. That's why the DS exist.


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

I'm worried as well. Since learning if my bf's history I've been jealous and resentful because I've bareky expiernced anything, so if I happened to date someone else... *le sigh* will probably be experienced too and it'll just be sad...


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> I'll try and make you laugh, one has to work(spend money) to get some. The other one doesn't. Yes, I am a board certified misogynist/woman hater/pig.


Why not go to a prostitute then? Unless you see dating as prostitution. In which case, thank you for the laugh.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

AllToAll said:


> Why not go to a prostitute then? Unless you see dating as prostitution. In which case, thank you for the laugh.


I have once or twice.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> I have once or twice.


Problem solved!


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

AllToAll said:


> Problem solved!


:boogie:clap:yay


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## pita (Jan 17, 2004)

I'm curious. How many of you have had partners who asked about your sexual history?

I haven't had very many relationships, granted, but nobody's ever asked me about that. And it's not a question I'd ever ask.


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

meganmila said:


> Yes us promiscuous women are evil *****es hehheehe. You know if a guy is gonna use me for sex why can't I do the same. I actually liked using him.


Did you really like using him


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Insider said:


> I'm worried that no girl will ever want to be with me when she finds out I'm a virgin with no experience at 21.


21?

Try 29 and almost 30 for me. :no


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

QuietandShy said:


> My number is up there but guess what? I would never tell a potential boyfriend that. They wouldn't like it and it's none of their business anyways, if they do ask, just say the number of boyfriends you've had. even if you have actually had more sexual partners. Like for me I would say 3 because I have had 3 boyfriends...but sexual partners I have had more. As long as you are clear for stds then it doesn't matter that is all in the past.


Would you ever ask a guy how many girls he has being with


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Norton said:


> Would you ever ask a guy how many girls he has being with


I am also wondering this.


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## Skttrbrain (Jun 17, 2011)

There definitely is a double standard. Women don't get praised for being promiscuous since getting laid is relatively easy whereas for a man to get laid it's a "skill". Since men are aware how easy it is for women to get laid so they're hoping she is somewhat "choosy". Guys are aware of how often women get propositioned for sex so the possibility of a woman accepted most of those offers.. well, it's gonna hurt a guys ego. I think that men also like to imagine women being different from them.. that women are sweet and not horndogs who'll hump anything. And lastly, no man wants to feel like "just another notch on the bedpost" EVEN THOUGH men can do this. Yup, it's a double standard that I don't agree with. I know there is a lot of sexist drivel in this post, but this is what I think men see. Maybe some guys are different and don't care. I'm not promiscuous however simply because I cannot separate love and sex.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

I think the main difference is that men place importance on physical appeal. Women place importance on personality and social confidence.

Since they both do this, men are more likely to be attracted to someone who every single man out there wants to bed, but for some reason this woman chose them instead of every other man. Because of this, they feel special. This can play into virginity, because a woman who is good looking, and who saves herself, is automatically more attractive to the average man.

Women, on the other hand, place importance on personality and social confidence. In that way, a guy can be extremely good looking, but if he is sexually inexperienced, that throws a wrench in his ability to have A.) a good personality, and B.) be socially confident. She will think, _"What's wrong with this man? Why have other women not seen what I see in him?" _She will automatically think everything is wrong with him, even if he is appealing to her in every other way, if she discovers that he is not sexually experienced.

In other words, the number of men women sleep with only matters if it makes her look like she won't settle down. The number of women men sleep with, on the other hand, both matter if they are too high, or too low. If they are too high, she thinks he won't settle down, and is a player. If they are too low, she will think there is something seriously wrong with him, and will avoid him.


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

Skttrbrain said:


> There definitely is a double standard. Women don't get praised for being promiscuous since getting laid is relatively easy whereas for a man to get laid it's a "skill". Since men are aware how easy it is for women to get laid so they're hoping she is somewhat "choosy". Guys are aware of how often women get propositioned for sex so the possibility of a woman accepted most of those offers.. well, it's gonna hurt a guys ego. I think that men also like to imagine women being different from them.. that women are sweet and not horndogs who'll hump anything. And lastly, no man wants to feel like "just another notch on the bedpost" EVEN THOUGH men can do this. Yup, it's a double standard that I don't agree with. I know there is a lot of sexist drivel in this post, but this is what I think men see. Maybe some guys are different and don't care. I'm not promiscuous however simply because I cannot separate love and sex.


Unfortunately it would remain a double standard because society expects certain things from men versus women. I wish i could promise you that it would get better but men act in ways that are not the best and that is something that should change but hasnt so far.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

It doesn't matter anyways cause men have no way of knowing how many people a woman has screwed unless they live in a small town. That is the beauty of the big city. Total anonymity.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

komorikun said:


> It doesn't matter anyways cause men have no way of knowing how many people a woman has screwed unless they live in a small town. That is the beauty of the big city. Total anonymity.


Can a woman tell how many women a guy has screwed? Or not?


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

WintersTale said:


> Can a woman tell how many women a guy has screwed? Or not?


No. You can tell if he is inexperienced (never been in a relationship) but there is no way of knowing if they slept with 5 or 50 women. I mean maybe if he has a whole bunch of women writing on his facebook page and gets lots of phone calls from women you might assume he has been recently screwing around. Many close female friends is also suspicious. Good looking and outgoing people are more likely to screw around. But if that is all in the past and they haven't been promiscuous in a good while it would be very hard to tell.

I don't see how anyone would be able to tell with me unless they looked on my computer and saw various photo albums and what I post on this forum. Almost all the guys I banged are in other countries. They don't post on my facebook. I'm pretty quiet and not flirtatious at all. I dress really plain. Okay, maybe after a couple gin and tonics I may go in for the kiss.


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## T-Bone (Oct 1, 2010)

WintersTale said:


> Can a woman tell how many women a guy has screwed? Or not?


If she says she can, she's probably full of crap. I'm sure she can tell whether the sex is good for her or not but unless you tell her, how could she possibly know? Especially when the _majority_ of men aren't exactly known for their ability to please women (or even care if they do) anyways.


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## luceo (Jan 29, 2011)

pita said:


> I'm curious. How many of you have had partners who asked about your sexual history?
> 
> I haven't had very many relationships, granted, but nobody's ever asked me about that. And it's not a question I'd ever ask.


I've had one ask. I always thought it was one of those "don't ask, don't tell" things, but she wasn't quite so experienced with relationships so maybe that's part of it?


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Skttrbrain said:


> There definitely is a double standard. Women don't get praised for being promiscuous since getting laid is relatively easy whereas for a man to get laid it's a "skill". Since men are aware how easy it is for women to get laid so they're hoping she is somewhat "choosy". Guys are aware of how often women get propositioned for sex so the possibility of a woman accepted most of those offers.. well, it's gonna hurt a guys ego. I think that men also like to imagine women being different from them.. that women are sweet and not horndogs who'll hump anything. And lastly, no man wants to feel like "just another notch on the bedpost" EVEN THOUGH men can do this. Yup, it's a double standard that I don't agree with. I know there is a lot of sexist drivel in this post, but this is what I think men see. Maybe some guys are different and don't care. *I'm not promiscuous however simply because I cannot separate love and sex*.


see you my dear, you show "restraint", and that's a quality/something I could grab onto, and maybe build trust. A person with no "restraint" AKA enjoys casual sex (translation)I'll screw anything the minute I'm aroused is someone I/ or people like me couldn't have a relationship(could some fun though) with because of the trust factor. These are the same people who when they get "bored" they want to bring others to the bedroom as well. If I was looking for a relationship you would be the kind of girl I would pursue no doubt.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> see you my dear, you show "restraint", and that's a quality/something I could grab onto, and maybe build trust.
> 
> If I was looking for a relationship you would be the kind of girl I would pursue no doubt.


I'm sure she's thrilled :roll



theseventhkey said:


> A person with no "restraint" AKA enjoys casual sex (translation)I'll screw anything the minute I'm aroused is someone I/ or people like me couldn't have a relationship*(could some fun though*) with because of the trust factor.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Norton said:


> Did you really like using him


Yes.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

I like women who never had sex.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

I've thought about lying about my inexperience but I know that she will realize that I've never had sex before. I don't know if it will ever happen though.


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## au Lait (Sep 8, 2010)

Personally I think it's great when a man admits that he judges a woman based on how many sexual partners she's had. 

It lets any woman who may possibly be interested know that he's a **** shamming bag of ***** who should be avoided at all cost.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

au Lait said:


> Personally I think it's great when a man admits that he judges a woman based on how many sexual partners she's had.
> 
> It lets any woman who may possibly be interested know that he's a **** shamming bag of ***** who should be avoided at all costs.


Agreed...let the past be the past and if you can't get over it well that is your problem. I wouldn't judge a guy on his past so why should a guy judge me.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

au Lait said:


> Personally I think it's great when a man admits that he judges a woman based on how many sexual partners she's had.
> 
> It lets any woman who may possibly be interested know that he's a **** shamming bag of ***** who should be avoided at all costs.


That is absolute bull****.

As if women don't judge men on the same thing, right? :roll


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


> I'm sure she's thrilled :roll


What's so bad about that, yeah I would have fun, but I wouldn't want a *RELATIONSHIP*, fun is fun, relationship is a relationship which require trust, fun trust is not required. I don't care if she would be thrilled or not, I would respect and possibly trust somebody with restraint over a person with none.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Peter Attis said:


> That is absolute bull****.
> 
> As if women don't judge men on the same thing, right? :roll


I don't.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Peter Attis said:


> That is absolute bull****.
> 
> As if women don't judge men on the same thing, right? :roll


Lol, Peter Attis don't even worry about it dude, because a lot of women aren't honest with themselves or anybody else and that's the problem right there. Only a few women in this world carry the honesty trait.:bash


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

meganmila said:


> I don't.


Yeah, *you* may not, but several women do. And guess what? That's okay because it's their preference and their choice.

Look, it's not as black and white as "a guy doesn't want to date a girl because she's had X number of partners, so he's a ****-shaming misogynist piece of ****." There's a BIG area in the middle here. As long as he's not actually calling any girl that has casual sex a ***** or saying she's not worthy of respect, or being a hypocrite about it, why is he wrong? Is he not allowed that preference as well?


----------



## au Lait (Sep 8, 2010)

Peter Attis said:


> That is absolute bull****.
> 
> As if women don't judge men on the same thing, right? :roll


Please point out where I said it was ok for a woman to judge a man based on his sexual history.

That's ok. I won't wait up. Because you can't. What with how I never said (or even implied) that and all.

My statement in no way condones that sort of thinking in either gender, but keep on missing the point.

Or maybe you are just a bit butthurt because you fall into the category of one who judges the opposite sex based on how many people they have slept with, and you can't possibly bear the thought of women wanting nothing to do with you because of it.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Peter Attis said:


> That is absolute bull****.
> 
> As if women don't judge men on the same thing, right? :roll


Women will mostly never reject a man for a relationship based on his amount of previous partners.

Women like popular guys. Guys who had lots of women are popular.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

TPower said:


> Women will mostly never reject a man for a relationship based on his amount of previous partners.
> 
> Women like popular guys. Guys who had lots of women are popular.


Ummm ok...or maybe some of us don't care and don't judge.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

meganmila said:


> Ummm ok...or maybe some of us don't care and don't judge.


Would you judge if he were a 30-year old virgin?
Or, let me put it another way.

Would you have prejudices towards him if he were?


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

TPower said:


> Would you judge if he were a 30-year old virgin?
> Or, let me put it another way.
> 
> Would you have prejudices towards him if he were?


No


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

meganmila said:


> No


You're rare.


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

NCC


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Being a virgin is bad enough but never having kissed a girl is worse.


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## Visionary (Apr 13, 2010)

```
[CODE]
```
[/CODE]


Schizoidas said:


> 1 - 2 failed relationships could probably be explained but if the girl in question has had more than that, then chances are the problem is the girl.


Wow, you wouldn't be a nice person to be with.


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## Visionary (Apr 13, 2010)

Peter Attis said:


> Yeah, *you* may not, but several women do. And guess what? That's okay because it's their preference and their choice.
> 
> Look, it's not as black and white as "a guy doesn't want to date a girl because she's had X number of partners, so he's a ****-shaming misogynist piece of ****." There's a BIG area in the middle here. As long as he's not actually calling any girl that has casual sex a ***** or saying she's not worthy of respect, or being a hypocrite about it, why is he wrong? Is he not allowed that preference as well?


I don't care either, as long as the guy cares about me that's all that matters.


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

au Lait said:


> Or maybe you are just a bit butthurt because you fall into the category of one who judges the opposite sex based on how many people they have slept with, and you can't possibly bear the thought of women wanting nothing to do with you because of it.


Look, I know you and rest of the SAS Feminist Brigade all think you have every guy figured out because you all took the same 100-level women's studies course at community college, but please, understand you don't. (See, I can make brash assumptions based off message board posts too!)

Whether you said it was ok for women to do the same or not isn't the point. The point is, you said that a guy who judges women based on their sexual history is "a **** shamming bag of *****." I disagree with that, saying that women judge men on their sexual history as well, and that's a perfectly understandable preference. You resorted to calling me "butthurt because I fall into the same category," which I don't, at all, but I'll let you have that one so that it fits your assumption of a guy who just happens to disagree with you.

All I'm saying is, there's a difference between judging a girl's past and "****-shaming." If he's saying every girl that enjoys sex outside of the confines of a relationship is a *****? Yes, that's a problem. If he enjoys sex outside of a relationship but looks down on girls that do the same? Yes, that's a problem? If he's a more conservative type of guy that *doesn't* do that kind of thing, and doesn't want a girl that does that either? Is THAT a problem, or is that a reasonable preference?


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## Canucklehead (Aug 28, 2012)

Peter Attis said:


> Look, I know you and rest of the SAS Feminist Brigade all think you have every guy figured out because you all took the same 100-level women's studies course at community college, but please, understand you don't.


Oh snap!


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> What's so bad about that, *yeah I would have fun*, but I wouldn't want a RELATIONSHIP, fun is fun, relationship is a relationship which require trust, fun trust is not required. I don't care if she would be thrilled or not*, I would respect and possibly trust somebody with restraint over a person with none.*


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


>


:blah


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


>


Tell me what is it really, you got a guilty conscience about something? what happened? somebody must have got "drunk" and had a orgy with like 5 dudes at once or something.


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## QuietandShy (May 26, 2011)

Norton said:


> Would you ever ask a guy how many girls he has being with


Yeah I have asked just for fun and I don't care at all if its a high or low number for a guy it doesn't matter to me.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Wouldn't care a great deal. Casual flings and one night stands happen, people have fun, as long as they are safe about it and aren't self confessed sluzzies then id be fine with it. My concern is having a woman knowing I have had zero partners at my age, PLS BE NICE FUTURE RANDOM WOMAN!


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> somebody must have got "drunk" and had a orgy with like 5 dudes at once or something.


yeah, totally.


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

meganmila said:


> Yes.


nice....i bet you enjoyed it a lot. So any new guy in your life that you are enjoying....hehehe


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

QuietandShy said:


> Yeah I have asked just for fun and I don't care at all if its a high or low number for a guy it doesn't matter to me.


Thats cool it doesnt matter to you. So i am guessing you prefer a guy who has some experience or would you like to have someone who hasnt being experienced yet to show him the moves


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

meganmila said:


> Ummm ok...or maybe some of us don't care and don't judge.


I like that you dont judge and you dont care about it.....so what do you enjoy doing


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## Schizoidas (May 11, 2012)

Visionary said:


> Wow, you wouldn't be a nice person to be with.


I don't get it. I answered the question and explained why a number means something to me and somehow that makes me not nice..


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## missingno (Sep 29, 2011)

Meh as long as the girl hasn't had a train run on them or had double figures d***s in or around her mouth it's not really a big deal. Probably hard to find at my age though


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


> yeah, totally.


Well do what most of you all do best, lie and deny. Some poor sap will then come and sweep you and all your "luggage" and take you to paradise, and live happily ever after.


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

meeps said:


> yeah, totally.


High-five!


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

Wait, what's the need for restraint if you want to have sex with someone? It'd be like restraining the amount of books I read, or cupcakes I bake. Why would I wanna do that? So I can prove to a future potential boyfriend that I can restrain myself? I can show him my restraint by not punching his face in when he suggests that women should have less sexual partners than men.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> Well do what most of you all do best, lie and deny. Some poor sap will then come and sweep you and all your "luggage" and take you to paradise, and live happily ever after.


"I'm allowed to have fun, but god forbid a woman wants that too, they should be saving their virginities for us men! I'm allowed to do whatever I want with my penis without it reflecting on my character, but if you have a vagina, show some restraint you degenerate neighborhood pump, or I won't make you my housewife, hurrdurrr!"



Fruitcake said:


> High-five!


:high5



Fruitcake said:


> Wait, what's the need for restraint if you want to have sex with someone? It'd be like restraining the amount of books I read, or cupcakes I bake. Why would I wanna do that? So I can prove to a future potential boyfriend that I can restrain myself? I can show him my restraint by not punching his face in when he suggests that women should have less sexual partners than men.


:lol


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Fruitcake said:


> Wait, what's the need for restraint if you want to have sex with someone? It'd be like restraining the amount of books I read, or cupcakes I bake. Why would I wanna do that? So I can prove to a future potential boyfriend that I can restrain myself? I can show him my restraint by not punching his face in when he suggests that women should have less sexual partners than men.


Again, restraint to me shows that "maybe" she can hold out and won't screw someone else while my back is turned because I'm not around at the moment she is aroused.

And it's not about having sex with someone, it's more about just having sex with "anyone" when the need arrives. I can guarantee the main ones in here about having sex with any and everyone are the same ones who would be "flakes" in a relationship.


----------



## awkwardsilent (Jun 14, 2012)

Peter Attis said:


> Look, I know you and rest of the SAS Feminist Brigade all think you have every guy figured out because you all took the same 100-level women's studies course at community college, but please, understand you don't. (See, I can make brash assumptions based off message board posts too!)
> 
> Whether you said it was ok for women to do the same or not isn't the point. The point is, you said that a guy who judges women based on their sexual history is "a **** shamming bag of *****." I disagree with that, saying that women judge men on their sexual history as well, and that's a perfectly understandable preference. You resorted to calling me "butthurt because I fall into the same category," which I don't, at all, but I'll let you have that one so that it fits your assumption of a guy who just happens to disagree with you.
> 
> All I'm saying is, there's a difference between judging a girl's past and "****-shaming." If he's saying every girl that enjoys sex outside of the confines of a relationship is a *****? Yes, that's a problem. If he enjoys sex outside of a relationship but looks down on girls that do the same? Yes, that's a problem? If he's a more conservative type of guy that *doesn't* do that kind of thing, and doesn't want a girl that does that either? Is THAT a problem, or is that a reasonable preference?


Perfectly fair, At my age someone who is still single, or newly single (lets face it in your 30's most of the single people are the ones that have just left long term relationships).

In general though I don't hink this is as big a deal as it use to be. Especially the older you get. I think WE judge ourselves more than any man will. We (women) are the ones calling each other skanky (I'm guilty of that, sorry ) and judging each other for our choices. In general a lot of guys just don't care nearly as much as we think they do.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

Fruitcake said:


> Wait, what's the need for restraint if you want to have sex with someone? It'd be like restraining the amount of books I read, or cupcakes I bake. Why would I wanna do that? So I can prove to a future potential boyfriend that I can restrain myself? I can show him my restraint by not punching his face in when he suggests that women should have less sexual partners than men.


However sex is a big source of emotion. People who want and have casual sex could well cause problems.

People that sleep around by having lots of 1 night stands = Dont have much respect for their bodys (imo) and clearly dont see sex as a special thing that it is. In a relationship sex is important, its a great bonding activity and brings people closer together. If someone is happy to share it with many 1 night stands with people they dont even know or have a bond with... why would they think of it as anything but a bit of fun in an actual relationship? I wouldnt want to be with someone who has spent the past 6 months having numerous meaningless 1 night stands as I wouldnt expect them to think its as meaningful as I do in a relationship.

People that have "fun buddys" is another problem, fair enough its fun with just the 1 person they often trust and care about in some ways, but as we have seen many times before, it usually ends when 1 person falls for the other... They stop what they have before it turns into a relationship and so the person who was falling for them may feel inclined to get on with a rebound to fill the gap


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


> "I'm allowed to have fun, but god forbid a woman wants that too, they should be saving their virginities for us men! I'm allowed to do whatever I want with my penis without it reflecting on my character, but if you have a vagina, show some restraint you degenerate neighborhood pump, or I won't make you my housewife, hurrdurrr!"
> 
> :high5
> 
> :lol


Bottomline, man or woman anybody that is a slave to flesh is not to be trusted in any capacity, business deals, relationships, plans for going out. Slave to the flesh is a kin to being a slave to the crack pipe in my opinion. When they are "jonesing" for flesh, everything gets stepped on and put on the backburner much like a crack addict or a person eating themselves to death will do the same thing when they need a fix. Anybody with no restraint in anything can not be trusted.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> Bottomline, man or woman anybody that is a slave to flesh is not to be trusted in any capacity, business deals, relationships, plans for going out. Slave to the flesh is a kin to being a slave to the crack pipe in my opinion. When they are "jonesing" for flesh, everything gets stepped on and put on the backburner much like a crack addict or a person eating themselves to death will do the same thing when they need a fix. Anybody with no restraint in anything can not be trusted.


wow...:sus You're still not getting it are you?


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Fruitcake said:


> Wait, what's the need for restraint if you want to have sex with someone? It'd be like restraining the amount of books I read, or cupcakes I bake. Why would I wanna do that? So I can prove to a future potential boyfriend that I can restrain myself? I can show him my restraint by not punching his face in when he suggests that women should have less sexual partners than men.


Hell yeah!

I think some people just have different *Opinions *about this topic. Some think sex should ONLY be about emotional connection and see one night stands as dirty and ewwy and no "self respect" . Others see sex as a fun thing that doesn't have to have emotional connection and CAN very well still have self respect. I mean if everyone is being safe and consensual what's the problem.

Of course I can't change anyone's mind in this place and see it as what people are comfortable with doing with their bodies. And don't ****ing shame them for it.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


> wow...:sus You're still not getting it are you?


I was thinking the same thing about you. Is that ego of yours or hormones or whatever make you that dense. Damn!?!! lol, you youngsters.:blank


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meganmila said:


> Hell yeah!
> 
> I think some people just have different *Opinions *about this topic. Some think sex should ONLY be about emotional connection and see one night stands as dirty and ewwy and no "self respect" . Others see sex as a fun thing that doesn't have to have emotional connection and CAN very well still have self respect. I mean if everyone is being safe and consensual what's the problem.
> 
> Of course I can't change anyone's mind in this place and see it as what people are comfortable with doing with their bodies. And don't ****ing shame them for it.


Who's "shaming" who? I think it's perfectly okay do whatever to your body. So if you want tons of people in your bed, go ahead, but don't get upset if someone you like finds out about your transgressions and decide to walk away.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> Who's "shaming" who? I think it's perfectly okay do whatever to your body. So if you want tons of people in your bed, go ahead, but don't get upset if someone you like finds out about your transgressions and decide to walk away.


So I can't do whatever I want with myself just cause of fear of someone judging me for my past? They're not worth it anyways. I rather have an open minded person that doesn't give a ****.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> I was thinking the same thing about you. Is that ego of yours or hormones or whatever make you that dense. Damn!?!! lol, you youngsters.:blank


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

If you are a virgin, and will be judged anyways for having too little experience, you are a hypocrite if you state that too many partners matters. 

If that person wants to be with you, despite your virginity, and you judge them for it, you are shooting yourself in the foot, and are an idiot.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Why do people care about how many people somebody has had sex with? I wouldn't like it if somebody looked at me being a virgin as something bad. If I liked a woman and found out that she had sex with a number of guys I wouldn't care.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

^ I don't get it....so you are an idiot if you are with someone that can look past your virginity...isn't that what you want?


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

meganmila said:


> ^ I don't get it....so you are an idiot if you are with someone that can look past your virginity...isn't that what you want?


I said you are an idiot if you judge someone for having too many sexual partners, when you will be judged by 90% of people for having too little sexual partners.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

WintersTale said:


> I said you are an idiot if you judge someone for having too many sexual partners, when you will be judged by 90% of people for having too little sexual partners.


:agree


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## Milco (Dec 12, 2009)

People judge each other for various silly things, but most of the time that's just considered their right on here.
Why is it that sexuality - and especially having sexual experience - gets people to react so strongly? In the threads about virginity being looked down on, people just said rather calmly that if anybody had a problem with you being a virgin, they were simply not the person for you, but in here, people are called various things which have been censored and people seem really upset.

It's silly to judge people on this, but considering the other things people are being judged based on, I'm really not surprised this would be an issue to some.
All we can do is try to improve ourselves though


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

I've seen on websites whenever somebody says they're a virgin and they're older than 20 years old that there is something wrong with them and they should be avoided. So does that mean that since you're over 20 then there is no way anybody would ever want you because you've never had sex. Am I out of luck because I'm a 40+ year old virgin.


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## Milco (Dec 12, 2009)

ravens said:


> So does that mean that since you're over 20 then there is no way anybody would ever want you because you've never had sex.


I hope I don't offend anyone by saying this, but..
If you're a virgin past X age and it isn't of your own choosing, it is likely because of some social problem which is making things hard - like social anxiety and low confidence for many of us on here.
I think that problem is what's making it difficult and not the virginity in itself.
Virginity just easily becomes a reminder of how undesirable we feel.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Milco said:


> I hope I don't offend anyone by saying this, but..
> If you're a virgin past X age and it isn't of your own choosing, it is likely because of some social problem which is making things hard - like social anxiety and low confidence for many of us on here.
> I think that problem is what's making it difficult and not the virginity in itself.
> Virginity just easily becomes a reminder of how undesirable we feel.


You're right about that. I've had the chance before but I've already told the story before so I'm not going through that again.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


>


Yeah, I'm leaning towards the ego.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meganmila said:


> So I can't do whatever I want with myself just cause of fear of someone judging me for my past? They're not worth it anyways. I rather have an open minded person that doesn't give a ****.


I didn't say you can't do it, you do whatever the hell you want to do, fu&k it. I see that you want it both ways. You want to screw everything that moves but you also want a person come along and everything be ****** dory. If that's the case go chop someone head off and say you can't arrest me because "past is past". Me as an individual I rather have "relationships" with people who don't go from person to person. The sexual experiences I ever had were with women like this, and I know enough about them I don't want to be seen in public with them let alone "romance" them.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> Me as an individual I rather have "relationships" with people who don't go from person to person.


you mean kinda like you've done, going from one "neighborhood pump" to the next?


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


> you mean kinda like you've done, going from one "neighborhood pump" to the next?


lol, you are a trip, you are going to be alright one day when you grow up, I have hope for you. I'm on a used car lot I see 2 cars. 1 has over 100 thousands miles the other has under 20 thousands miles, I will commit to the the car with the least amount of mileage, the 100 thousand mile car has a higher probability of "breaking down". I'll see you in the next thread meeps.:hug:dead


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> I didn't say you can't do it, you do whatever the hell you want to do, fu&k it. I see that you want it both ways. You want to screw everything that moves but you also want a person come along and everything be ****** dory. If that's the case go chop someone head off and say you can't arrest me because "past is past". Me as an individual I rather have "relationships" with people who don't go from person to person. The sexual experiences I ever had were with women like this, and I know enough about them I don't want to be seen in public with them let alone "romance" them.


Cause they are "dirty" huh...too bad.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> lol, you are a trip, you are going to be alright one day when you grow up, I have hope for you. I'm on a used car lot I see 2 cars. 1 has over 100 thousands miles the other has under 20 thousands miles, I will commit to the the car with the least amount of mileage, the 100 thousand mile car has a higher probability of "breaking down". I'll see you in the next thread meeps.:hug:dead


That analogy isn't perfect. If your analogy made sense, the 100 thousand mile car could give you amazing blowjobs while the <20 thousand mile one gives crappy, inexperienced ones. I bought a brand new car because other than price being a factor, the brand new car has every advantage in the game over an old model of the same brand.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> lol, you are a trip, you are going to be alright one day when you grow up, I have hope for you. I'm on a used car lot I see 2 cars. 1 has over 100 thousands miles the other has under 20 thousands miles, I will commit to the the car with the least amount of mileage, the 100 thousand mile car has a higher probability of "breaking down". I'll see you in the next thread meeps.:hug:dead


Wearied by trying to defend his position using logic, the misogynist retreats to the familiar territory of ****-shaming.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

:evil:hahaoke:twisted:yes


meeps said:


> Wearied by trying to defend his position using logic, the misogynist retreats to the familiar territory of ****-shaming.


----------



## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

phoenixwright said:


> That analogy isn't perfect. If your analogy made sense, the 100 thousand mile car could give you amazing blowjobs while the <20 thousand mile one gives crappy, inexperienced ones. I bought a brand new car because other than price being a factor, the brand new car has every advantage in the game over an old model of the same brand.


At least I'm close to being the only one to break it in myself. Atg least it isn't a "clunker".


----------



## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

meganmila said:


> So I can't do whatever I want with myself just cause of fear of someone judging me for my past? They're not worth it anyways. I rather have an open minded person that doesn't give a ****.


You can do whatever you want, but you have no control over how someone will react to it or what they'll think about it.


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

theseventhkey said:


> lol, most men don't have a choice(only the hot/rich ones get to pick and choose), they have to *take whatever they can get. Myself included, *beggars and can't be choosers. :lol





theseventhkey said:


> A person with no "restraint" AKA enjoys casual sex *(translation)I'll screw anything the minute I'm aroused* is someone I/ or people like me couldn't have a relationship(could some fun though) with because of the trust factor. These are the same people who when they get "bored" they want to bring others to the bedroom as well.





theseventhkey said:


> Again, restraint to me shows that "maybe" she can hold out and won't screw someone else while my back is turned because I'm not around at the moment she is aroused.
> 
> And it's not about having sex with someone, it's more about just having sex with "anyone" when the need arrives. * I can guarantee the main ones in here about having sex with any and everyone are the same ones who would be "flakes" in a relationship.*


hahaha


----------



## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

theseventhkey said:


> Who's "shaming" who? I think it's perfectly okay do whatever to your body.


Hmmm I wonder...



theseventhkey said:


> I wouldn't want to get with the neighborhood pump.





theseventhkey said:


> Tell me what is it really, you got a guilty conscience about something? what happened? somebody must have got "drunk" and had a orgy with like 5 dudes at once or something.





theseventhkey said:


> I'm on a used car lot I see 2 cars. 1 has over 100 thousands miles the other has under 20 thousands miles, I will commit to the the car with the least amount of mileage, the 100 thousand mile car has a higher probability of "breaking down".





theseventhkey said:


> At least I'm close to being the only one to break it in myself. Atg least it isn't a "clunker".





theseventhkey said:


> enjoys casual sex (translation)I'll screw anything the minute I'm aroused


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

theseventhkey said:


> At least I'm close to being the only one to break it in myself. Atg least it isn't a "clunker".


I can't understand how you can describe a woman who can give amazing blowjobs as a clunker?


----------



## 50piecesteve (Feb 28, 2012)

5 is nothing, I know girls with 20+ at your age which is gross, but that never stopped me anyways. Ive been through Hell ive been through fire a womens warmth is what i desire :bah


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

WintersTale said:


> I can't understand how you can describe a woman who can give amazing blowjobs as a clunker?


Lol, a good first car to get me back and forth to high school and work and home. But I won't commit to a car like this, not dependable, it will always have maintenance issues, could throw a rod at any minute. I will however commit to a newer model, a little bit more dependable. I am in a position now I can buy me newer model cars, the one I have now runs smooth it's 20, 000 miles practically new, the only thing I had to worry about a oil change here or there. You think disputing me, will get you browny points with these soon to be clunkers go ahead. If I ever run into a lot full of "clunkers" I'll give them your number, cool?


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Fruitcake said:


> Hmmm I wonder...


:stu all these women here want to have their cake and ice cream as well with all these laundry lists of turn ons and turn offs, but when a man makes a request of what kind of woman he wants, the f&cking sky is falling. Now that I think about it they are so full of s&^%. Woman= she can be as picky as she wants Man= Has to take the woman "as is" no questions asks. This is crap, I know it and deep down underneath all that ego where the truth is suppressed they know it too.


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

theseventhkey said:


> :stu all these women here want to have their cake and ice cream as well with all these laundry lists of turn ons and turn offs, but when a man makes a request of what kind of woman he wants, the f&cking sky is falling. Now that I think about it they are so full of s&^%. Woman= she can be as picky as she wants Man= Has to take the woman "as is" no questions asks. This is crap, I know it and deep down underneath all that ego where the truth is suppressed they know it too.


My point had nothing to do with you not wanting to date someone who has been with a lot of men. It was to do with the way you are talking about women. If I understood your last point, you just referred to the woman you are currently dating as a car? And you bought her? You are talking about women being clunkers just for having a few sexual partners, when you think it's fine for you and other men to have that. I don't have a problem with men being picky but you're not just being picky, you're being really hurtful.


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## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

Fruitcake said:


> My point had nothing to do with you not wanting to date someone who has been with a lot of men. It was to do with the way you are talking about women. If I understood your last point, you just referred to the woman you are currently dating as a car? And you bought her? You are talking about women being clunkers just for having a few sexual partners, when you think it's fine for you and other men to have that. I don't have a problem with men being picky but you're not just being picky, you're being really hurtful.


Yes, the point we've been trying to make is that you are referring to women as objects (I think you think it's funny? it's not actually, since women have been and are _still_ seen and treated as objects in some places). And you're a giant hypocrite for saying it's okay for _you_ to engage in casual sex, while being incredibly disrespectful to women who do the same.


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## kj87 (Sep 30, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Not me, I like inexperience, once had a guy tell me he could take a bra off with one hand, I didn't like that. There are things I've done that men won't like, not threesomes but other things. Nobody decent will accept me.


Someone bragging that they can take a bra off with one hand is pretty ignorant. I wouldn't like that either.

I dont think it matters how many partners a female has had, as long as there is a sense of modesty about it. I've had more than a couple sexual partners, but I never go around telling people about it. When I'm asked, I answer truthfully. But I don't think there's too many to the point where a guy wont want you. I think when you care about someone things like that don't matter.

I also find it difficult to believe "no decent guy would want you." I think that a "decent" guy would love and accept you for you


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Fruitcake said:


> My point had nothing to do with you not wanting to date someone who has been with a lot of men. It was to do with the way you are talking about women. If I understood your last point, you just referred to the woman you are currently dating as a car? And you bought her? You are talking about women being clunkers just for having a few sexual partners, when you think it's fine for you and other men to have that. I don't have a problem with men being picky but you're not just being picky, you're being really hurtful.


How can I be hurtful to anybody in here? I don't know anybody in here "lurid" pasts. No one. Did I touch on something your sensitive about? All I know is what I would want.


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

theseventhkey said:


> How can I be hurtful to anybody in here? I don't know anybody in here "lurid" pasts. No one. Did I touch on something your sensitive about? All I know is what I would want.


You can be hurtful by insulting women for doing things you think it's okay for men to do. And by demeaning women. And objectifying them. Yeah, I'm sensitive about that. It hurts me to know that some people think women should be treated and judged this way. It hurts me to see women treated like unintelligent, unfaithful, worthless bodies to be used, shamed, and lumped into your category of stereotypical ****s, when they could be intelligent, kind, thoughtful, faithful people.
And you haven't just said what you want. You've said degrading things about women who have casual sex. That's not simply stating what you want.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

meeps said:


> Yes, the point we've been trying to make is that you are referring to women as objects (I think you think it's funny? it's not actually, since women have been and are _still_ seen and treated as objects in some places). And you're a giant hypocrite for saying it's okay for _you_ to engage in casual sex, while being incredibly disrespectful to women who do the same.


I don't think anything is funny, I'm being dead serious. I currently am not engaging in casual sex, when I was a youngster I wreckless once or twice but it definitely wasn't a "habit"(it wasn't that great) you guys make it seem like I a wh&re hound or something. Come to think about I had a couple of offers and i walked away. I'm almost 30 and I'm not over 5 so is it wrong for me to want someone like that as well? Someone who was "judicious" with the amount of people they were with. Moreover I could care less what other men do, we were talking about people who we are intimate with I don't get intimate with men. So f^%$ what other men do. I do know the differences between the sexes though, but we already went through this. So in short I don't think I'm a "giant hypocrite". My low number keeps me from being one.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Fruitcake said:


> You can be hurtful by insulting women for doing things you think it's okay for men to do. And by demeaning women. And objectifying them. Yeah, I'm sensitive about that. It hurts me to know that some people think women should be treated and judged this way. It hurts me to see women treated like unintelligent, unfaithful, worthless bodies to be used, shamed, and lumped into your category of stereotypical ****s, when they could be intelligent, kind, thoughtful, faithful people.
> And you haven't just said what you want. You've said degrading things about women who have casual sex. That's not simply stating what you want.


Why do you guy's keep saying that I'm okay with what other a%$holes do? I'm not concerned about them, if they want to run around and put themselves at risk with diseases and unwanted pregnancies they can go right ahead. The only I recognize is that men put way more work in bedding women than women do, but I never said I'm okay with either one, I don't care, I tell my brothers and sisters to keep their zippers up. I'm only talking about the woman I would be comfortable committing to. Because what she was into could affect me. I just can't get with a woman who lives that way, she could have all the qualities you've mentioned but I can't get with a woman like that. I live a disciplined life, I would want my partner to as well, but this is probably another reason why I will get married but that's another story.


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## ohgodits2014 (Mar 18, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> How can I be hurtful to anybody in here? I don't know anybody in here "lurid" pasts. No one. Did I touch on something your sensitive about? All I know is what I would want.


I had to go a few pages back, but I believe your posts in this thread can be summed up to: Guys can have casual sex and still know how to be in a seriously relationship; girls can't. Therefore, while I wouldn't say no to casual sex myself I wouldn't want to date a girl who's had casual sex.

Do you really not see why people take issues with your "preference"? I don't care if people who have certain values wants a partner who have the same values, but usually guys on SAS (at least the ones who are here a lot) somehow think it's OK for them to have one standard for themselves and a different standard for girls they're willing to date. As if they really have that many options to begin with.



> I do know the differences between the sexes though


Do you also know that since girls are more likely to get approached by guys who just want sex it actually would make a lot more sense to expect their number to be higher than yours than the other way around? Especially if you're the type of person who would approach a girl on the basis of how hot she is. If YOU think the way she looks is a good enough reason to approach her, why would you expect other guys not to have the same thought (and "succeed" with her, so to speak)?


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## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

I am 21 and virign, and never kissed a girl.


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

theseventhkey said:


> Why do you guy's keep saying that I'm okay with what other a%$holes do? I'm not concerned about them, if they want to run around and put themselves at risk with diseases and unwanted pregnancies they can go right ahead. The only I recognize is that men put way more work in bedding women than women do, but I never said I'm okay with either one, I don't care, I tell my brothers and sisters to keep their zippers up. I'm only talking about the woman I would be comfortable committing to. Because what she was into could affect me. I just can't get with a woman who lives that way, she could have all the qualities you've mentioned but I can't get with a woman like that. I live a disciplined life, I would want my partner to as well, but this is probably another reason why I will get married but that's another story.


You said you take what you can get in terms of sex and that you have fun with women. Yet you degrade women for having casual sex/a high amount of sexual partners in the ways I quoted in that post before and you have continued since. Also, I don't see what you mean by disciplined if you have been disciplined yet have had casual sex with multiple partners, but women who do the same are not disciplined.
You're not talking about the women you would be comfortable committing to when you call women in this thread soon to be clunkers.


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## fredbloggs02 (Dec 14, 2009)

Those of you who went into a relationship with a sincere belief that they were everything.

Did you ever fundamentally change as a character? Do you feel you lost a specific quality inside yourself that expected so much from them you felt liberated when that expectation were lost to you, or always an equal hope and equal disillusionment with successive relationships that never left you?


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

rednosereindeer said:


> I had to go a few pages back, but I believe your posts in this thread can be summed up to: Guys can have casual sex and still know how to be in a seriously relationship; girls can't. Therefore, while I wouldn't say no to casual sex myself I wouldn't want to date a girl who's had casual sex.
> 
> Do you really not see why people take issues with your "preference"? I don't care if people who have certain values wants a partner who have the same values, but usually guys on SAS (at least the ones who are here a lot) somehow think it's OK for them to have one standard for themselves and a different standard for girls they're willing to date. As if they really have that many options to begin with.
> 
> Do you also know that since girls are more likely to get approached by guys who just want sex it actually would make a lot more sense to expect their number to be higher than yours than the other way around? Especially if you're the type of person who would approach a girl on the basis of how hot she is. If YOU think the way she looks is a good enough reason to approach her, why would you expect other guys not to have the same thought (and "succeed" with her, so to speak)?


Please stop comparing my "creeds" with other dudes. Please. I know what I would want, and if I recall this whole thing, I did say I rather not know(it's best to keep skeletons in the closet) but if I happened to find out, I'm out. I don't expect anything, but if she has a low number especially at my age knowing she had way more offers than I did tells me something about her character. A character trait that I could value. That's the thing she had a number of offers and only a few succeeded. She didn't go for "ALL or MOST" offers. That's what would stick out. The woman that did take most or all, that wouldn't appeal to me. Your preference is your preference, my preference is my preference. Moreover I know what I want doesn't exist anyway(not at my age and I won't go young) so I've prepared myself for the other option "live alone". So there we have it, that's the ball game.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Fruitcake said:


> You said you take what you can get in terms of sex and that you have fun with women. Yet you degrade women for having casual sex/a high amount of sexual partners in the ways I quoted in that post before and you have continued since. Also, I don't see what you mean by disciplined if you have been disciplined yet have had casual sex with multiple partners, but women who do the same are not disciplined.
> You're not talking about the women you would be comfortable committing to when you call women in this thread soon to be clunkers.


I'll rephrase it, I "took" what i could get at the time. Also, If I remember I wrote I "could" or "might" have fun with a woman like this, but I won't commit to them. What else do you want me to write? I can't prove discipline here, if you knew the people that know me they will tell you same thing. I don't let my urges control me and I get them sometimes but I don't act. Well, like I wrote to rednosed reindeer what i want doesn't exist, and I sure as hell with not go with 18 year old so I'm sh*t out of luck. I'm prepared live with my "preference" to the very, no one is losing anything. Let's leave it at that.


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

theseventhkey said:


> I'll rephrase it, I "took" what i could get at the time. Also, If I remember I wrote I "could" or "might" have fun with a woman like this, but I won't commit to them. What else do you want me to write? I can't prove discipline here, if you knew the people that know me they will tell you same thing. I don't let my urges control me and I get them sometimes but I don't act. Well, like I wrote to rednosed reindeer what i want doesn't exist, and I sure as hell with not go with 18 year old so I'm sh*t out of luck. I'm prepared live with my "preference" to the very, no one is losing anything. Let's leave it at that.


Yeah, leave it at that and just ignore the multiple times people have told you it's hurtful and sexist to make disgustingly rude comments about women based on them doing the same thing you do.


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

meeps said:


> "I'm allowed to have fun, but god forbid a woman wants that too, they should be saving their virginities for us men! I'm allowed to do whatever I want with my penis without it reflecting on my character, but if you have a vagina, show some restraint you degenerate neighborhood pump, or I won't make you my housewife, hurrdurrr!"
> 
> :high5
> 
> :lol


So do you mind if a guy is experienced or would you prefer a non-experienced guy. I am assuming that you are ok with a girl who is experienced


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

When asked how many sexual partners have you had, does that mean how many you have gone the whole way with or does it include oral?


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

​


Lonelygirl1986 said:


> When asked how many sexual partners have you had, does that mean how many you have gone the whole way with or does it include oral?


So I am guessing you have done more of the oral kind more than going the whole way


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Yeah  I guess that's bad.


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## path0gen (Jun 28, 2006)

The answer is going to be different for everyone. For me, what I consider "normal" or acceptable to the point where I don't obsess over it or feel inadequate or concerned or what have you, has evolved over the years and according to my own experience. My breakdown is as follows:

When I was 16-20: Anything more than 5 put me off. The fewer the better.

When I was 21-25: Anything more than 15 seemed excessive. But it didn't really concern me unless the number was much higher, like 25+.

When I was 26-30: Anything more than 25 high. I was starting to slow down myself at this point and promiscuity isn't attractive if still practiced in your late 20's.

When I was/am 31-present: I still feel as though 25-30 is a nice, round number. It's enough to ensure that your partner is going to be well-educated and have seen/done just about everything. But not so high a number that you have to worry about them having going through a "****ty phase" that lasted 10 years. 

My own number is 25. I don't suspect it will change and I don't feel as though I've "missed out" by not sleeping with dozens of other people. I did date two people that had slept with 50+ people themselves. One of them I think closer to 100 and it always bothered me. For some reason, I just felt like I was being compared during/after sex, even though I'm sure that wasn't the case.


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## path0gen (Jun 28, 2006)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Yeah  I guess that's bad.


No, that's not bad. And I personally don't count oral-only experiences as counting or my number would be much higher. I would actually consider a higher ratio of oral to intercourse a good thing. To me, it indicates that you have some self-control and are willing to help satisfy your partner without engaging in the most intimate activities.


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

Well I've done the oral thing with 7 guys and I'm nearly 26.


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

So


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## path0gen (Jun 28, 2006)

> when I was a youngster





> I'm almost 30


On a side note, I found this to be really humorous. ​


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## Norton (Aug 18, 2012)

Lonelygirl1986 said:


> Well I've done the oral thing with 7 guys and I'm nearly 26.


If you have done oral that many times then you must like and are comfortable doing it. You shouldn't feel bad. Any guy would be lucky to get at least one


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

path0gen said:


> On a side note, I found this to be really humorous. ​


What's freaking humorous about it? some people age fast(beyond their years)


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

What's the oral thing?


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

^ Pretty disgusting is you ask me.


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## Lonelygirl1986 (Sep 4, 2012)

anyway it's got kinda boring these days.....


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## atlex (Jul 23, 2012)

Who cares


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