# I dislike promiscuity



## gaz

Even though i am not religious i don't like promiscuity. I don't really think that sex should only be for married couples but I believe that sex should be kept in the confines of a loving relationship.

Is it unusual for a non reliigious person to have this view?


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## Tania I

Good! Nice view and good role model.
Finally the teens here will feel alright to to have their own views about it that differ from sexual commercials.
I don't think it's weird to prefer meaningful relationship, and i believe there are people who thinks that way too, if not many.



Soulsurvivor said:


> That's fine. Just don't be promiscuous yourself.
> 
> When it comes to what other consenting adults do behind closed doors - that's outside of your jurisdiction and inconsequential to you.


and i agree with you too sir.


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## Owl-99

gaz said:


> Even though i am not religious i don't like promiscuity. I don't really think that sex should only be for married couples but I believe that sex should be kept in the confines of a loving relationship.
> 
> Is it unusual for a non reliigious person to have this view?


I agree with you, promiscuity is to forward and in your face. I always prefer modesty and humbleness.


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## Soulsurvivor

That's fine. Just don't be promiscuous yourself. 

When it comes to what other consenting adults do behind closed doors - that's outside of your jurisdiction and inconsequential to you.


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## gaz

im glad others share similar views. I was brought up a methodist christian but stopped attendin meetings(which i was forced to) at the age of twelve. I just dont believe a person has to be religious to live decently. Many people think that a person who disagrees with casual sex is religious or plain weird. I dont find it natural or appealing to share the body with a stranger or someone you dont care about, and sex is the most intimate thing a person can do. Im still a virgin and have never dated etc but even if i did not have sa i would have the same belief


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## Emu

From my experience, some of the most scantily dressed girls out there are Christians. It's like some sort of oxymoron or something. Christians have an unhealthy preoccupation with sex, in my belief.


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## 0589471

I personally don't care for it either, but it's really up to the people and how they want to express themselves.

Though I am tired of being approached and instead of getting to know me as a person, trying to "compliment" me with sexual innuendo and suggesting what they can "do for me" as some sort of way of flirting?

I'd rather build a relationship off of getting to know someone as a person and visa-versa rather than start off with all the sex-talk and messing around. I guess it works for some people, but that's not how I like to get to know someone.

Again, every person can do with their bodies what they will, but that's just not me.

[Edited]



niacin said:


> Be safe and don't hurt anyone. Whatever else you do is your business.


I agree with this too.


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## millenniumman75

Nothing wrong with it. You just see sex as more than a physical act.....one that a person should not be playing games with!


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## Freiheit

I'm on the same boat.


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## gaz

I used to look at porn on occasion but i have not looked at any for years because i did not like the way my mind was being warped. I still get sexual urges but i desire sex within a relationship and not some random encounter. 

I have serious trust issues because everywhere i hear of people being cheated on by their partners/spouses and this is something which scares me. I imagine what it would feel like to fnd out that you've been cheated on and it makes me feel sick just thinking about it. I can't remember the stats of how many people have cheated but it's very high and unnerving, and a lot of people cheat without having ever being found out. What i find awful is that some people find cheating acceptable and no big deal.

I'm just sick of sex being the ''norm'' of society like it's as casual as having a cup of coffee in the morning or something. If one is not sexually active then it's ''weird''..I fall into the trap of thinking there's something wrong with me but it's hard not to when sex is everywhere.


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## gaz

Emu said:


> From my experience, some of the most scantily dressed girls out there are Christians. It's like some sort of oxymoron or something. Christians have an unhealthy preoccupation with sex, in my belief.


Most people in the western world are Christians whether non practicing or not. I am still Christian but i'm a non practicing one at that. So even prostitutes could be Christian at birth but it does not mean they are religious.


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## roseblood

Soulsurvivor said:


> When it comes to what other consenting adults do behind closed doors - that's outside of your jurisdiction and inconsequential to you.


Exactly! What's wrong with people having sex with other people outside of a relationship as long as everybody is being responsible and safe? I'm not Promiscuous myself but it's a natural urge.


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## komorikun

Sometimes it can take years to find a boyfriend/girlfriend. What are you supposed to do in the meantime, be celibate? And a lot of times even if you want a relationship the other person doesn't.


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## TheComedian

I'm a virgin, but I feel the same way. Maybe it's because I resent everyone else for being able to live that way, but I honestly don't even want to have sex anymore. 

I'm physically attracted to girls, but mentally disgusted by society.
In the words of Lil wayne: "I am not a human being".


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## Foh_Teej

Why are humans the only organism to appeal to morality to govern a biological function?


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## albrecht

Foh_Teej said:


> Why are humans the only organism to appeal to morality to govern a biological function?


Sex can be analytically reduced to biology in the same sense that speech can be reduced to biology. By that time, however, the analyzer will have realized that he got the wrong 'layer' of experience. It's like saying you've interpreted a work by Charles Dickens by looking closely at the paper the book is made of.


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## SilentLyric

that's what most people believe anyways in america. bunch of prudes.


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## Soulsurvivor

roseblood said:


> Exactly! What's wrong with people having sex with other people outside of a relationship as long as everybody is being responsible and safe? I'm not Promiscuous myself but it's a natural urge.


Totally. I'm not promiscuous either. Far from it. One of the most sexless people by choice I know. BUT, if I were to be, it would be for no one else apart from me to play abiter over the correctness of my sexual behavior.

The title of this thread uses negative language, hence why I'm coming at it from this angle. An alternative title such as 'monogomy is right for me' or something along those lines would be more appropriate because it speaks of the OP's own personal preference only and contains no value judgment relating to others.


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## UltraShy

Emu said:


> From my experience, some of the most scantily dressed girls out there are Christians.


I guess they simply wish to show off the blessings the good lord bestowed upon them.

Would he have created those heavenly boobs & luscious a** if he didn't wish for his marvelous creation to be seen?


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## gaz

roseblood said:


> Exactly! What's wrong with people having sex with other people outside of a relationship as long as everybody is being responsible and safe? I'm not Promiscuous myself but it's a natural urge.


Because it's meaningless and selfish. Having sex for the sake of having sex with a person you don't care about and does not care about you is no different to masturbating, except that you are using the other person's body for your needs. It is merely for the purpose of self gratification and not like sex in a loving relationship to share love and form a close bond.

Besides it's not really safe when you consider condoms are not 100% safe, and hooking up with a stranger in particular carries a huge risk for the saftey of the person.


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## gaz

komorikun said:


> Sometimes it can take years to find a boyfriend/girlfriend. What are you supposed to do in the meantime, be celibate? And a lot of times even if you want a relationship the other person doesn't.


I have no problem with it. What's the use of having sex just for the sake of it just because one is sexually frustrated? I'd rather wait for the right person than do it with random people who mean nothing to me and for whom i mean nothing to them. The problem with society is that it's all based around sex and people get into relationships for the wrong reasons.


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## gaz

Foh_Teej said:


> Why are humans the only organism to appeal to morality to govern a biological function?


Because that's what makes us different and advanced as a human race. Ohterwise we would be no different to other animals and we would be running around wild killing others and being savages (although some people do live this way)


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## Fruitcake

gaz said:


> Because it's meaningless and selfish. Having sex for the sake of having sex with a person you don't care about and does not care about you is no different to masturbating, except that you are using the other person's body for your needs. It is merely for the purpose of self gratification and not like sex in a loving relationship to share love and form a close bond.
> 
> Besides it's not really safe when you consider condoms are not 100% safe, and hooking up with a stranger in particular carries a huge risk for the saftey of the person.


Why is it selfish if the other person wants it too?
It doesn't have to be with strangers. It can be in friends with benefits scenarios.

Also someone mentioned humility and modesty... you can be humble and modest while having sexual relationships with people you're not in love with.

Why would meaninglessness make it bad anyway? Obviously not every promiscuous person is having sex for meaning, they're having sex for pleasure. Its lack of meaning doesn't make it bad for them. And sex is more pleasurable to them than masturbating.
Anyway, I think sex can be meaningful between two people who are sexually attracted to one another. Its meaning is not related to love but sex can be emotional and passionate without love.

I would be open to sex without being in a relationship and it's not because society is focused on that or encourages it or I'm sexually frustrated.


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## gaz

SilentLuke said:


> that's what most people believe anyways in america. bunch of prudes.


It doesn't make a person a prude just because they have strong beliefs.


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## komorikun

You don't think people use each other in relationships? They totally do. There might be a bond in relationships but people break up all the time.


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## Fruitcake

gaz said:


> It doesn't make a person a prude just because they have strong beliefs.


That's not why they called them prudes.


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## Fruitcake

It's funny how people seem to think that if you're not in love the sex must be devoid of meaning and any deep emotion. There are so many emotions and states in between, like lust, infatuation, caring about someone, connecting to them and bonding with them, without either partner being in love or being committed to one another. I think all of those emotions can make sex as amazing outside a relationship as in a relationship, and most of them can make it as meaningful and intimate.


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## restinfish

yeah how about we just dictate what's meaningful and what isn't wouldn't that be cool


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## caveman8

gaz said:


> Because it's meaningless and selfish. Having sex for the sake of having sex with a person you don't care about and does not care about you is no different to masturbating, except that you are using the other person's body for your needs. It is merely for the purpose of self gratification and not like sex in a loving relationship to share love and form a close bond.
> 
> Besides it's not really safe when you consider condoms are not 100% safe, and hooking up with a stranger in particular carries a huge risk for the saftey of the person.


You are providing pleasure to each other. That has meaning in itself. Why make it so complicated? Nice thing for two people to do.


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## Quinn the Eskimo

> Because it's meaningless and selfish. Having sex for the sake of having sex with a person you don't care about and does not care about you is no different to masturbating, except that you are using the other person's body for your needs. It is merely for the purpose of self gratification and not like sex in a loving relationship to share love and form a close bond.


thats just the way youre choosing to look at it..

so sex in a relationship has nothing to do with gratification? its just because you love them so much and it has nothing to do with getting off? yea right. thats not how the world works and thats not how people are.

sure a relationship is nice, im not downplaying it in any way, im just trying to sever the false belief that sex is somehow something that can only be shared between two people after so and so and so and so requisite is met

ive had sex with a lot of girls who i werent dating and a lot of the times they were one night stands, and that didnt make it any less special or meaningful to me than if we were "in love" and "dating"

sex is sex. its a natural thing for two 'animals' or 'humans' to do. being promiscuous has nothing to do with "using" people, like theyre cotton swabs or something - no - theyre real people who are acting in the consensual act of sex


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## fredbloggs02

I'm sure there are people who are honest when they say this, those who have the informed right to speak for themselves and those who don't; though I think most concerned about it are charlatans who believe man must for the sake of civilization be restricted, or those who would do the same in similar circumstances as those they condemn with envious spite. Envious fear as if the act were prohibited drives most people to despise pleasure for pleasure's sake are my thoughts, because pleasure for pleasure's sake has always been considered an anti-social act. The more I've thought about it, the less those who behave differently from me repulse me. Skepticism has a way of socializing strong beliefs I think, to some depth at least-it couldn't turn a fundamentalist away from his belief, I doubt his ability to turn skepticism against himself...unless he were satisfactorily coerced, lol. 

I think the way to live is to not hold to any duty that binds you to something that makes you uncomfortable. It seems true to me that experience is prohibited to most in society who hold to Christian tenets without realizing those are subject to change as their experiences educate them, those to whom principles follow experiences as opposed to many desiccated, wizened old men at birth who are entirely subject to rationalistic principles with nothing in reserve. For those of a certain disposition, I can imagine every rationalistic tenet becoming more appealing as they decay.


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## Soulsurvivor

gaz said:


> Because it's meaningless and selfish. Having sex for the sake of having sex with a person you don't care about and does not care about you is no different to masturbating, except that you are using the other person's body for your needs. It is merely for the purpose of self gratification and not like sex in a loving relationship to share love and form a close bond.


How ridiculous. Not even worth the serious responses its been given. The whole premise of the subject/thread is absurd. Its simply not for you to comment on, or adjudicate the moral soundness of, sexual behavior outside of relationships unless it's your own.

Emotional immaturity and residual Christian conditioning is also illustrated in your false presumption that care can't exist outside of relationship.

Spend more time minding your own business.


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## Paper Samurai

Foh_Teej said:


> Why are humans the only organism to appeal to morality to govern a biological function?


Because we as a race have realised long ago that going on pure instinct is not the way forward.

That being said however, reason and logic are infinitely better arbiters to action compared to morality.


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## RUFB2327

gaz said:


> It doesn't make a person a prude just because they have strong beliefs.


And it doesn't make a person indecent or selfish to sleep around. Your feelings towards people who are promiscuous are the same as my feelings towards people who feel their opinions on a subject are the truth and anyone who goes against that opinion is living a horrible life and Aren't good people.


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## NoMoreSAD2013

I dissagree man. I think people should be as sexual as they care for and not be judged by anyone. Some people are more sexual than others.Its one of those whatever floats your boat type things. Its funny how sex is one of the most desired things but at the same time is one of the most scrutinized. We all are sexual beings in the end.Even you yourself have admitted to always watching porn.That sexual part of yourself has went nowhere in the midst of your porn relinquishing ways. Its still inside you. I say people stop inhibiting themselves just because of social pressures,and start being ...well normal. Its o.k to love sex. Matter fact anyone under a certain circumstance can be what people would consider "*****s"


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## NoMoreSAD2013

gaz said:


> Even though i am not religious i don't like promiscuity. I don't really think that sex should only be for married couples but I believe that sex should be kept in the confines of a loving relationship.
> 
> Is it unusual for a non reliigious person to have this view?


Could you explain your reasoning why you have to be in a loving relationship to have sex? Ive heard many women say that emotionally there was nothing there but our sex was great and that held the relationship together.


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## NoMoreSAD2013

gaz said:


> I have no problem with it. What's the use of having sex just for the sake of it just because one is sexually frustrated? I'd rather wait for the right person than do it with random people who mean nothing to me and for whom i mean nothing to them. The problem with society is that it's all based around sex and people get into relationships for the wrong reasons.


You shouldnt dictate why other people get into relationships. Sex is a great thing, with or without someone you have spent less than a cup of tea with. Its fun man.simple as that. you dont need to justify it with wishy washy bull****. to do so in my opinion makes it appear like you are pandering to the female crowd. What you dont know is fifty shades of gray is predominately supported by a female audience,yet the book features things socially unacceptable by most fenales. as soon as we as men stop pandering like how you are and get comfortale with our sexuality, so will women


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## roseblood

gaz said:


> Because it's meaningless and selfish. Having sex for the sake of having sex with a person you don't care about and does not care about you is no different to masturbating, except that you are using the other person's body for your needs. It is merely for the purpose of self gratification and not like sex in a loving relationship to share love and form a close bond.
> 
> Besides it's not really safe when you consider condoms are not 100% safe, and hooking up with a stranger in particular carries a huge risk for the saftey of the person.


Love and sex are not the same thing. How is it meaningless and selfish? It is our biological nature, we are animals and it's what we do. For you to deny that is delusional and unrealistic. Humans started being monogamous when we developed agriculture. Men Would leave their crops to their sons, but they didn't know who that was biologically, and so Monogamy began. Just try to be more open to human sexuality. It may not be for you, but don't lessen people who explore their sexuality.


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## gomenne

roseblood said:


> Love and sex are not the same thing. How is it meaningless and selfish? It is our biological nature, we are animals and it's what we do. For you to deny that is delusional and unrealistic. Humans started being monogamous when we developed agriculture. Men Would leave their crops to their sons, but they didn't know who that was biologically, and so Monogamy began. Just try to be more open to human sexuality. It may not be for you, but don't lessen people who explore their sexuality.


If we are animals do we just stop at sex, why don't we do other animistic things, and use other instincts; like eating from the ground, eating raw food from hunted animals, being naked (no matter the weather), living in the woods and in the wild, not use any tools or anything technological, not using language, why do we just stop at sex and then say "we're animals that's what we do" well keep on doing the rest of the things that animals do. But I know what you are going to reply, so please don't reply I just wanted to comment.


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## roseblood

gomenne said:


> If we are animals do we just stop at sex, why don't we do other animistic things, and use other instincts; like eating from the ground, eating raw food from hunted animals, being naked (no matter the weather), living in the woods and in the wild, not use any tools or anything technological, not using language, why do we just stop at sex and then say "we're animals that's what we do" well keep on doing the rest of the things that animals do. But I know what you are going to reply, so please don't reply I just wanted to comment.


You can't expect not to get a reply. We used to once be that way, just like we once used to approach sex in a different way we approach it now. Just like we have become more civilized in our way of eating and living, we have developed monogamy throughout time.


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## NoMoreSAD2013

gomenne said:


> If we are animals do we just stop at sex, why don't we do other animistic things, and use other instincts; like eating from the ground, eating raw food from hunted animals, being naked (no matter the weather), living in the woods and in the wild, not use any tools or anything technological, not using language, why do we just stop at sex and then say "we're animals that's what we do" well keep on doing the rest of the things that animals do. But I know what you are going to reply, so please don't reply I just wanted to comment.


So what is your argument? that we shouldnt embrace our natural tendencies? it would be our natural tendency to do all the things you mentioned,but like she said we have developed our culture and lifestlyes(there are places where we havent). we may be complex animals,but animals nonetheless.


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## sweetluvgurl

I'm not the most religious either, and I also believe that sex should at least be in a loving relationship. I wish more people had the view like the OP. So many people nowadays see sex as just a physical act or something to bring them pleasure.


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## F1X3R

Isn't the term "meaningless sex" usually applied to many acts of promiscuity? That's why it's called casual sex, right?


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## caveman8

sweetluvgurl said:


> I'm not the most religious either, and I also believe that sex should at least be in a loving relationship. I wish more people had the view like the OP. So many people nowadays see sex as just a physical act or something to bring them pleasure.


It is a physical act. And what's wrong with pleasure? Is that a bad thing?


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## Emu

UltraShy said:


> I guess they simply wish to show off the blessings the good lord bestowed upon them.
> 
> Would he have created those heavenly boobs & luscious a** if he didn't wish for his marvelous creation to be seen?


By that logic, maybe women should just strip naked and parade the streets and then have a gigantic orgy. Why don't men just take it all off and do the same? It's because women are sex objects in the society's mind, and men aren't.


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## NoMoreSAD2013

Emu said:


> By that logic, maybe women should just strip naked and parade the streets and then have a gigantic orgy. Why don't men just take it all off and do the same? It's because women are sex objects in the society's mind, and men aren't.


Women are plenty of other things as well. And im certain society thinks men are nothing but pigs for those sex objects.


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## MollyAmins

Promiscuity is fine, just use goddamn protection. It's completely one's own business what they want to do with their bodies. Consensual sex between adults is natural. No, love and sex are not the same thing. At all, and do not need to be treated as always coinciding. Sex is a need. Saying sex should only be had by people in love is very silly, in my opinion.


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## DeeperUnderstanding

I dislike promiscuity, mostly because the attractive women won't want to sleep with me.


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## Emu

sweetluvgurl said:


> I'm not the most religious either, and I also believe that sex should at least be in a loving relationship. I wish more people had the view like the OP. So many people nowadays see sex as just a physical act or something to bring them pleasure.


I agree. There should be more people who have this opinion. Too bad everyone else is a sexually driven animal. Some people need to climb a little higher on the evolutionary tree.


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## caveman8

We may be human, but we are still sexually driven animals.


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## ugh1979

Emu said:


> I agree. There should be more people who have this opinion. Too bad everyone else is a sexually driven animal. Some people need to climb a little higher on the evolutionary tree.


How is it more 'evolved'?


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## NoMoreSAD2013

WintersTale said:


> I dislike promiscuity, mostly because the attractive women won't want to sleep with me.


Most people have sexual desires. Once you judge someone or make comments relfecting your hatred of those desires,its no wonder people arent open to them. Be open about sex and so will others. because again,we all have them


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## Emu

NoMoreSAD2013 said:


> Most people have sexual desires. Once you judge someone or make comments relfecting your hatred of those desires,its no wonder people arent open to them. Be open about sex and so will others. because again,we all have them


If some people don't have those desires, does that make them weird or something? I can go forever without even thinking about sex. It just doesn't make sense to me.


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## NoMoreSAD2013

Emu said:


> If some people don't have those desires, does that make them weird or something? I can go forever without even thinking about sex. It just doesn't make sense to me.


Maybe you have yet to find yourself. Actually its something most women have to work at. And no it doesnt make you wierd.


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## Rainbat

Same. I'm as non-religious as they come but I can't stand promiscuous women. It's hypocritical though, because I myself am promiscuous. But my promiscuity is with non-promiscuous women. That makes sense, right? I have no clue.


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## wordtourmother

I dislike mushrooms. It's ok if you like them though.


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## caveman8

Rainbat said:


> Same. I'm as non-religious as they come but I can't stand promiscuous women. It's hypocritical though, because I myself am promiscuous. But my promiscuity is with non-promiscuous women. That makes sense, right? I have no clue.


Need details of these "non-promiscuous" women. Married and looking for fun would be my guess. Or you have a stable of buddies, but that wouldn't really make you promiscuous. Otherwise how would you know they're not promiscuous?


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## NoMoreSAD2013

Rainbat said:


> Same. I'm as non-religious as they come but I can't stand promiscuous women. It's hypocritical though, because I myself am promiscuous. But my promiscuity is with non-promiscuous women. That makes sense, right? I have no clue.


But you yourself will probably have sex with multiple people in your life. I dont see the difference between you doing 3 people now or spreaded out across the years. We should all admit,any quams about promiscuity are indicators of people who are jealous,which is probably the case.


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## Rainbat

caveman8 said:


> Need details of these "non-promiscuous" women. Married and looking for fun would be my guess. Or you have a stable of buddies, but that wouldn't really make you promiscuous. Otherwise how would you know they're not promiscuous?


Well, you've got a point in that I don't know for sure if they're not promiscuous. But all of the girls I've gone after and ended up fooling around with have claimed that they weren't with very many guys. Usually around 1 to 3 partners for each of them. So what I meant is that ... although I've been with a bunch of women, the women I've been with haven't been with a bunch of men.



NoMoreSAD2013 said:


> But you yourself will probably have sex with multiple people in your life. I dont see the difference between you doing 3 people now or spreaded out across the years. We should all admit,any quams about promiscuity are indicators of people who are jealous,which is probably the case.


Well, jealousy is a fear of loss, and I don't necessarily think I'll lose anything by being with these women. It's more of a general disdain for the lifestyle. Again, it's hypocritical because that's sort of my lifestyle too. I don't know. Promiscuous women just bother me for some reason. I hope nobody hates me for that.


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## caveman8

Hey you know the rule - for girls you multiply the number of partners they said they have by about 3 or 4 or so. For guys, you divide.


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## Canucklehead

caveman8 said:


> Hey you know the rule - for girls you multiply the number of partners they said they have by about 3 or 4 or so. For guys, you divide.


I thought you couldn't divide by zero.


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## fredbloggs02

I don't think most people realize what they're advocating when they say: "lets be open about sexuality between people who only care for the other as instruments solely useful to reach for pleasure's highest state of Katharsis" as if that were compatible with societal morality. Promiscuous or not, freedom is still limited..


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## NoMoreSAD2013

Rainbat said:


> Well, you've got a point in that I don't know for sure if they're not promiscuous. But all of the girls I've gone after and ended up fooling around with have claimed that they weren't with very many guys. Usually around 1 to 3 partners for each of them. So what I meant is that ... although I've been with a bunch of women, the women I've been with haven't been with a bunch of men.
> 
> Well, jealousy is a fear of loss, and I don't necessarily think I'll lose anything by being with these women. It's more of a general disdain for the lifestyle. Again, it's hypocritical because that's sort of my lifestyle too. I don't know. Promiscuous women just bother me for some reason. I hope nobody hates me for that.


I cant help but to think its a matter of how they do that you are rejecting. Not all promiscuous people are ****ty and sloppy. If they can pull it off in a manner with intergrity and high class,then i see nothing wrong with living that way.


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## jonny neurotic

gaz said:


> Even though i am not religious i don't like promiscuity. I don't really think that sex should only be for married couples but I believe that sex should be kept in the confines of a loving relationship.
> 
> Is it unusual for a non reliigious person to have this view?


No. I feel much the same. I used to enjoy porn but managed to shift the focus of the energy through meditation and now porn is just boring to me...



Emu said:


> From my experience, some of the most scantily dressed girls out there are Christians. It's like some sort of oxymoron or something. Christians have an unhealthy preoccupation with sex, in my belief.


Totally. It goes with the territory. If they believe the bible then they will have to be sexually repressed. Sexually repressed people either don't have sex or masturbate EVER and get really frustrated or they become crazy ****s most at risk of contracting STD's. Neither is a good situation to be in, frankly...



fredbloggs02 said:


> I don't think most people realize what they're advocating when they say: "lets be open about sexuality between people who only care for the other as instruments solely useful to reach for pleasure's highest state of Katharsis" as if that were compatible with societal morality. Promiscuous or not, freedom is still limited..


This...


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## probably offline

albrecht said:


> Sex can be analytically reduced to biology in the same sense that speech can be reduced to biology. By that time, however, the analyzer will have realized that he got the wrong 'layer' of experience. It's like saying you've interpreted a work by Charles Dickens by looking closely at the paper the book is made of.


this

@OP: I couldn't care less about what other people do, but personally I'm not the type who experience gratification from sleeping with a bunch of strangers.


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## simian4455

probably offline said:


> this
> 
> @OP: I couldn't care less about what other people do, but personally I'm not the type who experience gratification from sleeping with a bunch of strangers.


How about a bunch of good-looking and nice-smelling strangers?


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## Blueshine

I rarely hear people say they dislike promiscuity.
I never tell anyone that I dislike it, because I know most people ARE promiscuous and would find me a prude.
I don't want to tell people how to live their lives, but it isn't stopping me in having an opinion.
Truth is, I could never sleep with someone I am not in a relationship with. I need trust to let anyone that close. I have personal boundaries. I don't strip naked and have random sex with a person I may not even see again.
But what to expect, most people grow up with that culture. It's normal that you've slept around, plus people feel an immense pressure in their teens to rid themselves of their virginity. I always told myself that I'd rather die a virgin than sleep with some douche just so I could have people accept me. I gave up on social acceptance a long, long time ago.

No, I don't like promiscuity and we are all allowed to have different opinions. I see sex as something personal, something you do with someone you love. Call me old school, outdated, ancient, a hopeless romantic but that's who I am. It's just such an important thing to me because all I have observed through my life are superficial people who trash each other as quickly as they trash objects and material. I want people to matter or to not be in my life at all. And thing is, this opinion gets more trashed than promiscuity does. At least in my home country.


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## caveman8

Blueshine said:


> I rarely hear people say they dislike promiscuity.
> I never tell anyone that I dislike it, because I know most people ARE promiscuous and would find me a prude.
> I don't want to tell people how to live their lives, but it isn't stopping me in having an opinion.
> Truth is, I could never sleep with someone I am not in a relationship with. I need trust to let anyone that close. I have personal boundaries. I don't strip naked and have random sex with a person I may not even see again.
> But what to expect, most people grow up with that culture. It's normal that you've slept around, plus people feel an immense pressure in their teens to rid themselves of their virginity. I always told myself that I'd rather die a virgin than sleep with some douche just so I could have people accept me. I gave up on social acceptance a long, long time ago.
> 
> No, I don't like promiscuity and we are all allowed to have different opinions. I see sex as something personal, something you do with someone you love. Call me old school, outdated, ancient, a hopeless romantic but that's who I am. It's just such an important thing to me because all I have observed through my life are superficial people who trash each other as quickly as they trash objects and material. I want people to matter or to not be in my life at all. And thing is, this opinion gets more trashed than promiscuity does. At least in my home country.


Things do not have to be deep to matter. A night of pleasure between two people is not so bad.

Also, assuming someone is a douche just for wanting to fulfill natural desires is wrong.


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## Kiwong

Promiscuity is not a problem for me. I actually like the idea of getting a good nights sleep these days


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## WalkingDisaster

I don't care what other people do. Everyone has their own desires sexually and that's fine. I imagine if were more attractive and confident I would sleep around a lot (assuming I wasn't in a relationship).


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## GetOutOfMyHouse

...


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## Barette

I think as long as the person uses protection and gets tested and knows it's safe, then they can sleep with whoever they want however much they want. As long as they're enjoying themselves, then more power to them.


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## identitycrisis

Kinda of two minds about this. On one hand, I personally agree with the OP. Maybe part of it is because it's been so long, but I view sex as something deeply personal that I wouldn't want to share with someone I don't care about. I'm not just there to seek my own pleasure; I want to please my partner just as much, if not more.

On the other hand, my old-fashioned views on sex are outdated, based mostly in a code of ethics I developed growing up in a Catholic household. I'm not a true believer in Christianity, so arguing that people shouldn't freely have sex when the only good reason I have to the contrary is a religious edict from a religion I don't believe in... well, that's hypocritical at best.


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## niacin

Be safe and don't hurt anyone. Whatever else you do is your business.


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## Dissonance

I agree with the Original Poster, I share his views on this.


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## low

gaz said:


> Even though i am not religious i don't like promiscuity. I don't really think that sex should only be for married couples but I believe that sex should be kept in the confines of a loving relationship.
> 
> Is it unusual for a non reliigious person to have this view?


I hold a similar view. I think people around our opinion are becoming rarer and rarer these days.


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## Melinda

I felt the same way about promiscuity for a long time. Being honest with myself, though, I think that _part_ of why I disliked it was because I was jealous of people being comfortable in their own skin -- if you're wearing tight or showy clothing, to some extent you have to be confident (or be damn good at acting confident.) Meanwhile I wanted to be invisible. I couldn't leave the house without feeling "covered" by a long jacket or a baggy sweater and jeans.

I wouldn't ever have sex with someone I wasn't in a committed relationship with. But I try not to judge people for having different views on that.


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## Noroshi

I have mixed feelings on it. Consenting adults and all. But there's also something to be said for "Everything in moderation."


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## awkwardsilent

@OP if thats how you feel thats good. I use to feel that way, I think I still do feel that way but am getting a little lonely so have ended up comprimising a couple times. At least I learned about myself from the experiences... :-| I gave up on the wait for marriage thing in my 20s. But yeah still Ideally I'd like to be in a relationship first... not sure if will ever happen though.


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## bluebutton

i have the same view, and i'm not exactly religious


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## shammie

gaz said:


> Because that's what makes us different and advanced as a human race. Ohterwise we would be no different to other animals and we would be running around wild killing others and being savages (although some people do live this way)


Like dolphins. Savage, murderous, have-sex-for-the-fun-of-it dolphins.



caveman8 said:


> It is a physical act. And what's wrong with pleasure? Is that a bad thing?


And



Soulsurvivor said:


> That's fine. Just don't be promiscuous yourself.
> 
> When it comes to what other consenting adults do behind closed doors - that's outside of your jurisdiction and inconsequential to you.


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## soupbasket

No, don't like it either. Some religious people I know are - it's funny.


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## saganist

My views are very similar.


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## rymo

_Making love_ should only be for people in a relationship. But for _plain old sex_, casual is fine. There's a huge difference emotionally between casual sex and lovemaking. Regular sex is completely silly, I don't see it as all that intimate beyond the physical sense.


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## minimized

I used to be like that, but then I realized I was parroting what I had been raised to believe and had a major stick up my rear.

If anything, we need more of it - maybe it will help people chill the hell out. Just not getting bombarded with it by pop culture.

Do what you want. Not everything has to have some deep, profound meaning and what is love anyway but a concept we have made up to facilitate our infatuations?

Baby don't hurt me, no more *Jim Carrey troll face*


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## Cocaine Unicorn

I used to feel like this until I realised that I have sexual urges just like everybody else, and there are times in my life where I don't feel interested in a serious relationship. Furthermore, I also realised that a lot of my concern revolved around being seen as a ****, and since my sex life is my business, that line of thinking just stopped making sense to me fairly quickly.


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## m27

I don't like it when people judge other people based on their sexual choices. Especially because it comes from a guy. Would you dislike a guy friend of yours who is promiscuous as much as you would dislike a girl friend of yours who is promiscuous? 
You say it's self-gratification and meaningless and selfish. So is drinking a cup of coffee in the morning, smoking a cigarette, accepting a compliment, watching porn, jogging or whatever action that makes you feel good and about which others couldn't care less. Why wouldn't be the same with sex?
You say it's no different than masturbating except that you are using other persons body for your needs. What's wrong with that??? As long as both parties know what they are getting into and don't expect anything from it, it's always much more fun than masturbating.
On the other side, you are right - sex can be amazing too if you are in a loving relationship. I just don't understand your aversion towards people who wanna have fun without the love part.


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## vstar401

i think promiscuity is a natural part of human beings wanting to pro-create as much as possible in order to pass on our genes. It is no use trying to resist this urge nor is it helpful to anybody. Just let nature take its course, but also try to keep monthly child support payments to what you can afford.


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## meeps

m27 said:


> I don't like it when people judge other people based on their sexual choices. Especially because it comes from a guy. Would you dislike a guy friend of yours who is promiscuous as much as you would dislike a girl friend of yours who is promiscuous?
> You say it's self-gratification and meaningless and selfish.* So is drinking a cup of coffee in the morning, smoking a cigarette, accepting a compliment, watching porn, jogging or whatever action that makes you feel good and about which others couldn't care less. Why wouldn't be the same with sex?*
> You say it's no different than masturbating except that you are using other persons body for your needs. What's wrong with that??? As long as both parties know what they are getting into and don't expect anything from it, it's always much more fun than masturbating.
> On the other side, you are right - sex can be amazing too if you are in a loving relationship. I just don't understand your aversion towards people who wanna have fun without the love part.


great post


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## thinkstoomuch101

i wouldn't call it "promiscuity".. i'd like to call it.. "practice"..:yes


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## Freiheit

I'm the same. And my reason for it is not religion either. There is something about promiscuity that I find off putting and gross, and no it's not jealousy because even if I had the opportunity to be promiscuous I still wouldn't.


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## thinkstoomuch101

show me Vin Diesel, and i would!!

When it comes to good looking, well built men? I don't turn down nothing but my collar!

:lol


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## Moochie

I used to have a friend who'd touch other guys' groins for cookies and goods. She purposely flirted with some guys so they'd buy her things and of course they fell in love with her, but she denied their advances and called them "gross" or "creepers". She would let freshman boys touch/squeeze her butt.. I was so grossed out that I cut our friendship. I don't like whatever that is called, maybe not being promiscuous but sure is yucky. Not my type of "fun" as she calls it.


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## Laura1990

gaz said:


> I used to look at porn on occasion but i have not looked at any for years because i did not like the way my mind was being warped. I still get sexual urges but i desire sex within a relationship and not some random encounter.
> 
> I have serious trust issues because everywhere i hear of people being cheated on by their partners/spouses and this is something which scares me. I imagine what it would feel like to fnd out that you've been cheated on and it makes me feel sick just thinking about it. I can't remember the stats of how many people have cheated but it's very high and unnerving, and a lot of people cheat without having ever being found out. What i find awful is that some people find cheating acceptable and no big deal.
> 
> I'm just sick of sex being the ''norm'' of society like it's as casual as having a cup of coffee in the morning or something. If one is not sexually active then it's ''weird''..I fall into the trap of thinking there's something wrong with me but it's hard not to when sex is everywhere.


I agree with you. I kind of wish more guys thought like this.


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## vstar401

Moochie said:


> I used to have a friend who'd touch other guys' groins for cookies and goods. She purposely flirted with some guys so they'd buy her things and of course they fell in love with her, but she denied their advances and called them "gross" or "creepers". She would let freshman boys touch/squeeze her butt.. I was so grossed out that I cut our friendship. I don't like whatever that is called, maybe not being promiscuous but sure is yucky. Not my type of "fun" as she calls it.


You should send me her facebook page so that I know who to avoid. Her address as well. Maybe her phone number too if it isn't too much trouble.


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## Shinichi

I don't really care what other people do but as Freiheit wrote (interesting name btw, especially in this context  ) there is something off-putting about promiscuity. What bothers me the most is this societal opinion that it's ok to sleep around but if you refuse to do so, you're some sort of weird pariah.


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## Smoothie

I dislike it too,I'm a bit of a prude when it comes to myself,I can't picture myself heavily making out with people watching,talking about sex or wear over the top sexy clothing.
I don't judge people though,I think people should do what they want,as long it doesn't hurt others.


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## diamondheart89

I agree. I think for a lot of people it's the symptom of mental illness or insecurity.


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## Barette

I think a lot of people who are promiscuous just like sex. And I don't see anything wrong with that.


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## WalkingDisaster

Barette said:


> I think a lot of people who are promiscuous just like sex. And I don't see anything wrong with that.


Exactly. If I were being offered sex with a different person every day, week, or whatever then I would go for it without any guilt. I think a lot about morality and I don't see anything wrong with what consenting adults choose to put where and at what time.


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## notthatsure

I'll just say it. Sex is overrated, and a crutch for a lot of people with social anxiety believe it or not. 

Personally, I am a fan of sex, and given the opportunity for an easy hook up I will more than likely take it given I have protection and feel comfortable with the person to a degree, even if they are stranger there some people you feel okay with and others that just freak me out, but long story short your beliefs are perfectly rational even though they aren't my beliefs. A preoccupation with sex, or lack of it only leads to depression and feelings of worthlessness from what I have encountered.


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## regimes

Soulsurvivor said:


> Totally. I'm not promiscuous either. Far from it. One of the most sexless people by choice I know. BUT, if I were to be, it would be for no one else apart from me to play abiter over the correctness of my sexual behavior.
> 
> The title of this thread uses negative language, hence why I'm coming at it from this angle. An alternative title such as 'monogomy is right for me' or something along those lines would be more appropriate because it speaks of the OP's own personal preference only and contains no value judgment relating to others.


^ all of this good stuff.
there's nothing morally wrong about sex. if folks wanna do it, and are able to consent and do, let em have at it. if they don't, that's fine too. none of anyone's business.

there's nothing wrong with being promiscuous and there's nothing wrong with being monogamous. as long as you don't hurt folks.


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## stradd

Emu said:


> I agree. There should be more people who have this opinion. Too bad everyone else is a sexually driven animal. Some people need to climb a little higher on the evolutionary tree.


You need to climb a little on the roof of a skyscraper and jump off. No one can seriously be this stupid. Are you seriuosly such a pompous ***** that you think you're above other people just because you don't have sex with people?

I'll apologize for being so harsh when you apologize for being so stupid.


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## ugh1979

stradd said:


> You need to climb a little on the roof of a skyscraper and jump off. No one can seriously be this stupid. Are you seriuosly such a pompous ***** that you think you're above other people just because you don't have sex with people?
> 
> I'll apologize for being so harsh when you apologize for being so stupid.


Well said.


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## The Lonely One

I personally do not appreciate promiscuity for my lifestyle, but I try not to judge others who do it. I think sexual feelings are natural, and some people are more open to indulging in said feelings casually, while others are not. I do think some promiscuous people do it in a very unhealthy way and they do it for bad reasons, but it's not my life.

I will say that promiscuity sometimes makes me...uncomfortable. I suppose it's a left over feeling from years of Christian moralistic thinking.


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## NoHeart

I dislike it too. I don't have a problem with people having sex or whatever but I don't see why people and especially males ( sorry guys! ) have to insist on it being the best thing in the world, the only thing that matters, blabla... NONSENSE!


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## Implicate

Live and let live.


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## SparklingWater

I'm 25 and have only had one lover. However I have no problem with people enjoying as much sex as they want provided they're safe and happy.

The problem is the word promiscuity has a negative connotation. Have sex with who you want when you want. No biggie no extra thought to it. No shame but what you impose upon yourself.


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## AntiGravitySlimePig

To the point of marriage, yes in my experience.
Being generally "promiscuous (whatever that means to you)" outside the realm of marriage, probably not.

Personally, I don't care. I would have no problem dating someone who had sex with dozens of people provided they didn't have an STD.

It's good to know what you like and the best way to find out what that is is to shop around.


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## dismiss

I'm no judge of what goes on in other peoples bedrooms, nor do I care.

Someone said sex is overrated in this thread... I disagree, completely. Maybe I've just been really lucky in that department. (though it sounds like a guy thing in the context of that post)
I miss it, & would love to have it again if I could find the right guy.

But I wouldn't judge another female for not waiting for that _right_ guy. I would if that guy was in a relationship with someone else already.

Once I was no longer in my parents care it wasn't an issue for me who they slept with. 
Other peoples promiscuity really only directly affects me if somebody is cheating on me. Or when a close friend gets hurt by the same thing.

I can find no other reasons to care.


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## AllToAll

Then don't be promiscuous. And no, it's not uncommon.


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## Donness

ugh1979 said:


> Well said.


+1


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## rawrguy

I'm the exact opposite of OP. I would gladly have promiscuous sex... with protection of course. It's just hard to get some if you have social anxiety.


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## brandonmag

gaz said:


> Even though i am not religious i don't like promiscuity. I don't really think that sex should only be for married couples but I believe that sex should be kept in the confines of a loving relationship.
> 
> Is it unusual for a non reliigious person to have this view?


Nope. I'm not very religious, and I look down on people who are promiscuous. They'll get theirs in the long run...


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## SilentWitness

I think promiscuity is overrated.  

I believe we should respect each other's lifestyle but and there is a but, would you want a partner who is/has been promiscuous? Other people's sex life is nobodies business but their own, unless we want a life partner, then it does become our business. 

Reaching double figures might be too much for one person while another doesn't care what the number is, while there are other's who only desire virgins. 

I think a couple wanting a long term relationship should divulge how many partners they've had, honesty is the best way to start. My opinion only.


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## dismiss

brandonmag said:


> Nope. I'm not very religious, and I look down on people who are promiscuous. *They'll get theirs in the long run...*


No, they're getting it right now! :teeth

.... sorry couldn't resist.


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## brandonmag

dismiss said:


> No, they're getting it right now! :teeth
> 
> .... sorry couldn't resist.


Lol.

Yeah, well, Everyone should have more respect for their bodies. What they do with them is up to them. I may have been overly emotional, being attacked in another post. I personally feel strong negative feelings towards any negativity proposed by another person in this forum. It's a social anxiety help site.

I am not promiscuous, I am not a bad looking guy either.

It's easier for a lot of women to have sex than most men. I hope I can find a woman who appreciates this in the future  Is it possible!>[email protected]!


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