# Would you spend your entire monthly paycheck on one gift?



## Skeletra (Aug 30, 2012)

Would you spend your entire monthly salary on one gift for someone spechial?

I watched a video about a colourblind guy seeing purple for the first time, and my boyfriend is colourblind, so I though that would be a nice birthday gift, but wow those things cost money... an entire months worth of pay checks/salary (what's the right word?) for me.
So that got me wondering. 
Would someone use that much of their paycheck for a gift in general?

Guys, I'm not asking what I should do :b


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## Xenacat (Oct 20, 2015)

That would be the most thoughtful gift. Yes!


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## Wings of Amnesty (Aug 5, 2015)

Although it won't be a surprise then, I think if you're considering spending a large amount of money like that then you should talk to him about it and find out if this is something he'd actually want. 

I wouldn't spend a lot of money on gifts, I actually don't like gift giving in general. Though, obviously amounts you'd spend depend a lot on how much you're making and how you're being supported. If you're only making $400 a month, then gifts are probably going to be a larger % of your salary just because that's how much stuff costs.


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## RandomDane (Dec 7, 2015)

I don't get it... Are you going to buy him the color purple??? :laugh:

Okay nvm, googled the video you are talking about, and apparently it's glasses that corrects colorblindness am i right? 

Whether you should spend a months salary on them.. Well, only you know whether you can afford it  If my economy could bear it, sure why not.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

You're talking about those glasses right? Um, I probably would if I had money to give. If you're living paycheck to paycheck its a tougher decision. I think I would just save up for it.


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## Skeletra (Aug 30, 2012)

Wings of Amnesty said:


> Although it won't be a surprise then, I think if you're considering spending a large amount of money like that then you should talk to him about it and find out if this is something he'd actually want.
> 
> I wouldn't spend a lot of money on gifts, I actually don't like gift giving in general. Though, obviously amounts you'd spend depend a lot on how much you're making and how you're being supported. If you're only making $400 a month, then gifts are probably going to be a larger % of your salary just because that's how much stuff costs.


Well, with a lower salary, you (plural, humanity) normally buy cheaper gifts or cheap gift cards. Nice things will always have their set price though.

I really do want it to be a surprise though. He's uncomfortable with me spending much money on him.



RandomDane said:


> I don't get it... Are you going to buy him the color purple??? :laugh:
> 
> Okay nvm, googled the video you are talking about, and apparently it's glasses that corrects colorblindness am i right?
> 
> Whether you should spend a months salary on them.. Well, only you know whether you can afford it  If my economy could bear it, sure why not.





Kevin001 said:


> You're talking about those glasses right? Um, I probably would if I had money to give. If you're living paycheck to paycheck its a tougher decision. I think I would just save up for it.


Buying him the color purple is a nice way to put it though :b, but yeah, it's those glasses. I can make it if I take it from my savings account ^^. Which I probably won't seeing as I might loose my job soon (rumors), and might need it before they're intended purpose (house).

Immagine going all life without really seeing certain colours?
As an artist, and someone who bases her entire memory "system" on colours and sounds, and who knows what she'd be missing, I'd say that's horrible. But I immagine it's not that big a deal for someone who doesn't know what they're missing ^^.


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## SD92 (Nov 9, 2013)

No, it's a waste of money. I'd save it for a rainy day. They can buy their own gifts.


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

Hell no.

I'm all for buying people gifts but not a whole months wages. I would save up slowly for something like that.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

Living paycheck to paycheck, no...

With a stable income that allows discretionary spending, yes, definitely...

Key words are 'someone special' -- wouldn't do it for just anyone, that's for sure.


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## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)

for me, not sure I would for someone else.


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## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

If it was needed, probably.


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## McFly (Jul 15, 2014)

If she kept me happy in the right ways , then I have no problem spending some dough on a gift to make a gf happy.

I think you're talking about getting EnChroma glasses for your boyfriend? As a colorblind guy, I think that's an awesome gift. But if you're living on a low income that's something you should spend rarely. Maybe once a year.


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

I've done that sort of thing without a moment's hesitation. But it was possible I was manic at the time.


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## knightofdespair (May 20, 2014)

I've done it before, but I couldn't do it right now.


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

I don't know, it would depend I think. I mean, if I made $10K a month, would a gift worth that much really make her happy? Happier than a gift that costs less, but meant more? I mean, really?


If I were to spend $5K on a really nice cruise or vacation for the two of us, would that mean more than some stupid rock she'd wear on her finger, or some stupid tennis bracelet or earrings?


Wait.


Wut?


Nevermind.


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## Hayman (Dec 27, 2014)

For someone else? Absolutely not. No one has ever spent a fortune on me in one go and therefore, why should I bother doing it for someone else when I know there would be no benefit or reward in it for me?

"_Someone special_" - Who would that be?! Does that person exist?! Not for me&#8230; :?

For myself? I'd consider it if it was something I absolutely had to have or was something very special indeed. I have spent about three quarters of it before on a single item, purely because I remain living at home with the parents, but I can easily count on one hand the amount of times I've done this. I then have to basically live like a pauper for about two months following to make up for the loss...


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

*comment about large monthly pay cheques*


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## Paul (Sep 26, 2005)

You really have to talk to him about it before considering it, and perhaps share costs with him or his family. If you get it for him without consulting him, he may end up wishing you hadn't spent all your money on it and you'll resent him for not being appreciative enough and he'll resent you for being presumptive and it'd have the potential to cause lots of long term problems. It's not the sort of thing that's good for a surprise gift, because it's a big life decision for both of you.


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## someone123 (Jan 12, 2016)

I don't have an income, but if i would, i would spend it all on a gift if it was something special for someone special.


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## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

No, but that would be a good present for someone. If it was something like that, then maybe I would.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Skeletra said:


> Immagine going all life without really seeing certain colours?
> As an artist, and someone who bases her entire memory "system" on colours and sounds, and who knows what she'd be missing, I'd say that's horrible. But I immagine it's not that big a deal for someone who doesn't know what they're missing ^^.


Its actually potentially worse though right? - Their state without seeing the colours is almost certainly as happy as you or me, since we more or less take the colours for granted. Sure there are moments of very very mild happiness (very) when we see a nice sunset or whatever. But for a colour blind person who is used to not seeing those colours its basically 'this is what you have been missing' glasses. Maybe. Dunno. If I were colour blind I wouldn't want them personally.

Its kinda "here's what you could have won (best part of the show )":








mentoes said:


> The only time this would be necessary for me is if it's for an engagement ring.


Would never spend a penny on an engagement ring out of principle. An engagement _something_ (with utility) perhaps, but never a completely useless bit of jewelry


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## Skeletra (Aug 30, 2012)

splendidbob said:


> Its actually potentially worse though right? - Their state without seeing the colours is almost certainly as happy as you or me, since we more or less take the colours for granted. Sure there are moments of very very mild happiness (very) when we see a nice sunset or whatever. But for a colour blind person who is used to not seeing those colours its basically 'this is what you have been missing' glasses. Maybe. Dunno. If I were colour blind I wouldn't want them personally.


Wouldn't you be curious?
I remember the first time I tasted shrimps when I was 26-27. I was overwhelmed. I had always been curious on them and at that point a whole new culinary world opened up to me.
My dad used to be deathly allergic, so I had been avoiding them until I got around to getting a test with my dad (I'm insanely terrified of needles). He was no longer allergic after a cancer operation and he too could eat them again. That was one of the best days in my life.
I get what you're saying though.


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## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

I don't even know what I would buy for $1600. A pony? I wouldn't be able to pay rent, then. My landlords, who I call Mom and Dad, may not be so happy with me. I also have monthly student loans that would affect my credit score if they were late. So if you take out those two things, I would have $800 left. I might spend that much on my parents. Y'know, give back a little. Me and my kids would just go without food that month.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Skeletra said:


> Wouldn't you be curious?
> I remember the first time I tasted shrimps when I was 26-27. I was overwhelmed. I had always been curious on them and at that point a whole new culinary world opened up to me.
> My dad used to be deathly allergic, so I had been avoiding them until I got around to getting a test with my dad (I'm insanely terrified of needles). He was no longer allergic after a cancer operation and he too could eat them again. That was one of the best days in my life.
> I get what you're saying though.


Yeh, I probably would be tempted to try them. But I can imagine now if everyone else saw colour as super vivid and beautiful and I had some glasses to view that, I am not sure whether my reaction would be one of happiness or annoyance - If it were a permanent (via an operation, or genetic therapy or something) then yeh obviously, but its like a taste or what you are missing with the glasses


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## Srylance (Apr 20, 2014)

Maybe this sounds dumb, but is their perhaps a way to rent these glasses? You could have them for a while, and then maybe see if it's worth buying afterwards. You can surprise him without a huge risk to go with it.


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## vsaxena (Apr 17, 2015)

Never. I very often spend money on other people, but not enough to interfere with my basic budgeting, saving and investing. There's being charitable, and then there's being just plain dumb. That said, I definitely believe in doing for others, particularly those who really need and/or deserve it.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

mentoes said:


> I see it as a symbolic gesture (an expensive one at that) that seals the deal, though you could argue the utility aspect of that gift is letting everyone know of the relationship status without a spoken word. Wouldn't mind though if I met someone who doesn't want an engagement ring, I'd simply show another way I'm dedicated to that person.


I guess I just have a problem with social traditions and norms that make no actual sense to me on a personal level 

Obviously a ring as a symbol of engagement is fine, but the expensive nature has more than the whiff of commercial scam and social manipulation to it.

In fact, having looked a little bit more into it:



> The idea that a man should spend a significant fraction of his annual income for an engagement ring originated de novo from De Beers marketing materials in the mid-20th century in an effort to increase the sale of diamonds. In the 1930s, they suggested that a man should spend the equivalent of one month's income in the engagement ring; later they suggested that he should spend two months' income on it.


 (from wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Engagement_ring).

For jewelry makers its like shooting fish in a barrel. Man (for some inexplicable reason) _desperately_ wants to get married. Woman wants a demonstration of commitment. Guy selling useless expensive **** steps in (cackling) and manages to persuade everyone involved that his overpriced bit of glass is just the demonstration of commitment that is needed 

But at any rate, I would personally probably come to the conclusion that I hadn't found the right woman if an expensive engagement ring was required.

I am peculiar though I guess


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## McFly (Jul 15, 2014)

splendidbob said:


> Its actually potentially worse though right? - Their state without seeing the colours is almost certainly as happy as you or me, since we more or less take the colours for granted. Sure there are moments of very very mild happiness (very) when we see a nice sunset or whatever. But for a colour blind person who is used to not seeing those colours its basically 'this is what you have been missing' glasses. Maybe. Dunno. If I were colour blind I wouldn't want them personally.


I can see colors they're just very muted. And it can be impossible to tell the difference between colors if the shade is similar.

In the video above, the guy accurately identifies the colors he sees when he first puts the glasses on, but when he removes the glasses he has difficulty telling colors apart. Also he mentions that normally the further away he is the harder it to detect the color. Which is true for myself also, when I move away from my monitor the colors become more muted, almost B&W.

This has been a slight handicap because I wanted to be a pilot as a kid but color blind people are prohibited from flying. Then I wanted to be an electrician but telling different colored wires was impossible. And I do photoshop semi professionally but people complain that I don't do the colors right even though I rely on a color blind tool that tells me the color that I hover the mouse over.

So personally I'd love to see this color fest that everyone else gets to enjoy. The only time I can really see vibrant colors is during a sunset.


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## Still Waters (Sep 18, 2008)

If I remember correctly,didn't you make a thread about wanting him to quit smoking? How about proposing he save the money he spends on smoking for the fancy eyewear instead? Might give him an incentive.


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## Skeletra (Aug 30, 2012)

McFly said:


> I can see colors they're just very muted. And it can be impossible to tell the difference between colors if the shade is similar.
> 
> In the video above, the guy accurately identifies the colors he sees when he first puts the glasses on, but when he removes the glasses he has difficulty telling colors apart. Also he mentions that normally the further away he is the harder it to detect the color. Which is true for myself also, when I move away from my monitor the colors become more muted, almost B&W.
> 
> ...


No way, my boyfriend and his, also color blind, friend wanted to be pilots. My boyfriend is an electrician though. His friend works in a bank.
I wonder how many people's dreams get crushed like that. Wish there was a permanent cure. Sadly these glasses still won't allow you to do that, but the screen ones can work for the photoshop issue.

Do you use photoshop in your job, or for a hobby? Can I see some of your photoshop work (on pm, something that has been critigued)?
I have a colorblindness simulator on my phone that I use some times when I try to make art, so that the colorblind can enjoy them the same way. I notice it's a bit of a challenge. Still haven't finished anything this way. I can immagine it's way more of a challenge when you can't really preview it.


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## OnlyPath (Jan 16, 2016)

A gift implies that its for another person. No, I would not. I'm young and need to take care of my own economic concerns before I even consider another person. This is why I bought none of my family Christmas gifts and probably won't for years. Some may see that to that I say who cares?


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## McFly (Jul 15, 2014)

Skeletra said:


> No way, my boyfriend and his, also color blind, friend wanted to be pilots. My boyfriend is an electrician though. His friend works in a bank.
> I wonder how many people's dreams get crushed like that. Wish there was a permanent cure. Sadly these glasses still won't allow you to do that, but the screen ones can work for the photoshop issue.
> 
> Do you use photoshop in your job, or for a hobby? Can I see some of your photoshop work (on pm, something that has been critigued)?
> I have a colorblindness simulator on my phone that I use some times when I try to make art, so that the colorblind can enjoy them the same way. I notice it's a bit of a challenge. Still haven't finished anything this way. I can immagine it's way more of a challenge when you can't really preview it.


That's interesting that he can work as an electrician because so much of the work involves multicolored wires. When I looked into it as a career online people joked a bit about color blind electricians. I tried to wire an outdoor outlet that had the hot and neutral black and white wires and red load and green ground. But I wired the red and green wrong and when the electrician came to fix the outlet he pointed out that this short circuited a portion of the wires causing them to fuse together so I figured that wasn't going to work out so I just do electrical stuff for a hobby.

I do photoshop mainly for fun and on rare occasion for magazines or websites. I looked through my hard drive for some examples to show you but couldn't really find any projects saved where I had trouble with colors, also because I'm disorganized. But most of the time it has to do with skin tones. I sometimes make the tone too yellowish or green because I have difficulty seeing the fleshy color. I remember back in kindergarten the teacher yelling and putting me on time out when I couldn't get the colors right during activities because she though I was being disruptive. But she was a ***** to everyone.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

Not for a relationship that is a year old.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Skeletra (Aug 30, 2012)

McFly said:


> That's interesting that he can work as an electrician because so much of the work involves multicolored wires. When I looked into it as a career online people joked a bit about color blind electricians. I tried to wire an outdoor outlet that had the hot and neutral black and white wires and red load and green ground. But I wired the red and green wrong and when the electrician came to fix the outlet he pointed out that this short circuited a portion of the wires causing them to fuse together so I figured that wasn't going to work out so I just do electrical stuff for a hobby.
> 
> I do photoshop mainly for fun and on rare occasion for magazines or websites. I looked through my hard drive for some examples to show you but couldn't really find any projects saved where I had trouble with colors, also because I'm disorganized. But most of the time it has to do with skin tones. I sometimes make the tone too yellowish or green because I have difficulty seeing the fleshy color. I remember back in kindergarten the teacher yelling and putting me on time out when I couldn't get the colors right during activities because she though I was being disruptive. But she was a ***** to everyone.


Maybe he has a milder degree. I know he struggles with yellow and with purple, and he sometimes seems to see many colours as red. He also really struggles with colours with lower contrasts. I know his friend is really bad at identifying colours in general.
I can see skin tones being tricky. It's not easy to describe the colours properly.
And that is a really **** thing to do as a kindergarten teacher. She should always verify first before assuming the child is being disruptive. Assumptions like that can ruin someone that young.


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## McFly (Jul 15, 2014)

Skeletra said:


> Maybe he has a milder degree. I know he struggles with yellow and with purple, and he sometimes seems to see many colours as red. He also really struggles with colours with lower contrasts. I know his friend is really bad at identifying colours in general.
> I can see skin tones being tricky. It's not easy to describe the colours properly.
> And that is a really **** thing to do as a kindergarten teacher. She should always verify first before assuming the child is being disruptive. Assumptions like that can ruin someone that young.


It's definitely a scale, the color recognition depending on the person. And color vision affects age. I could see pink and yellow more intense as a kid but now pink just looks grey and yellow doesn't pop out as much. That's good it worked out for your guy and he made a career when a lot of people with color blindness might have to rearrange their future goals. With my teacher, she wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, from what I remember so it didn't bother me that much.

Did you decide on the glasses? I checked on ebay because I'd like to  buy a pair for myself. There weren't many available and used pairs sell for just a bit lower than the new price. You might be able to contact the company and see if they have display models at a lower cost.


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## Skeletra (Aug 30, 2012)

McFly said:


> Skeletra said:
> 
> 
> > Maybe he has a milder degree. I know he struggles with yellow and with purple, and he sometimes seems to see many colours as red. He also really struggles with colours with lower contrasts. I know his friend is really bad at identifying colours in general.
> ...


Just out of curiosity, do you remember what it looked like? Or just that it was brighter?

I'm not going to get them yet. Maybe once the rumours blow off and I still have my job, or if I get a new job long before July. It would be neat though.
If I was sticking rich I'd get one for both of you .


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## McFly (Jul 15, 2014)

Skeletra said:


> Just out of curiosity, do you remember what it looked like? Or just that it was brighter?
> 
> I'm not going to get them yet. Maybe once the rumours blow off and I still have my job, or if I get a new job long before July. It would be neat though.
> If I was sticking rich I'd get one for both of you .


The colors I don't see well anymore I do remember and they were more intense. Now it's like if you select a color on a picture in photoshop and desaturate that color until it's hard to detect.

That's very nice of you to want to get me a pair! :squeeze No worries. Well I guess it does sound like you've been worried about your job for a while now. Hope you hang on to your job. And maybe soon there will be some chinese aftermarket glasses that work the same at a much lower cost.


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## AllieG (Feb 20, 2014)

Honestly? Yeah probably if I was lovestruck.


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## cat001 (Nov 1, 2010)

I wouldn't, I always need to put some money away for savings! If I saw something I could get but would cost the equivalent of my months wages I'd keep a mental note of it and put some aside each month until I could get it. I'd be in no rush, the gift is not going anywhere. This is how I afford my expensive camera kit; saving and patience.


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## JohnDoe26 (Jun 6, 2012)

No. I might save the money over time is what I'd do, but my entire monthly pay check, that's just stupid.


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## theotherone (Sep 1, 2015)

If I even had a job. Haha... get small things.

A gift never needs to be expensive to be appreciated. I'm serious.


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