# Paralyzed by constant feeling of being watched



## asittingducky (Apr 23, 2013)

I've been volunteering at this place for a while. I've spent enough time there to start getting over some anxieties and rash behaviors I have when I work around others. The problem is that I constantly feel like these people know more about me than I've ever discussed or been remotely interested in discussing. Ever since I moved back to this school it seems people are always making oddly specific comments about things I say at home or look up online or career and education plans I have. I just can't take it anymore. I hate being watched. And any time I think I hear a criticism for something I think or do, I just do it more to make sure I'm not influenced by others. What complicates things is that I think my parents might have had something to do with getting me in there which gave me a bad reputation right off the bat (before they even saw my terrible SA).


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## asittingducky (Apr 23, 2013)

Grrr I get so angry when nobody even acknowledges whether or not I'm being watched-BUMP


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## shypoet90 (Oct 14, 2013)

Being watched anywhere is terrible. When it happens to me I try to do whatever I think will make me appear "normal" like changing a vocal inflection or changing posture. It always sucks to hear people talk about you and construe the symptoms of SA as other things. Hard not to be erratic when you're under a microscope.


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## asittingducky (Apr 23, 2013)

That's the opposite of me. I refuse to change anything, good or bad, if I'm being watched. They shouldn't be watching me in the first place. In fact I test out to see just how much they watch me and then develop a deep hatred for them.


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## shypoet90 (Oct 14, 2013)

Hard not to develop a deep hatred for them. People have to have someone they can evaluate/critique to validate themselves. I think you have to look upon them with as much pity as they look at you. Don't be afraid to show some attitude, but not to the point of changing who you are on the inside.


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## asittingducky (Apr 23, 2013)

^Pity? Everywhere I go it's like people are talking about me before I even introduced myself. The only thing I want to change about myself is the social engineering skills to make their lives go to crap. Idk you may be right though because I definitely don't want to be the nice guy anymore...to anybody.


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## WYRD76 (Nov 13, 2013)

*reply to sitting duck*

*Yeah I also feel like a sitting duck. If I was a native american and they gave me a ritual name it would probably be sitting duck..
Im not 23 I am 37, but as a traveler I can tell you if you hate that being watched feeling try avoid living in Iceland or Finland.

I dont know how to help you, but what I do is totally avoid the MEDIA, like television and stay away from NEWS of any kind, e.g newspapers, CNN reports on the internet. Avoid MEDIA of all kinds.

By the way, do you have sleeping problems, or do you also suffer from
tinnitus, ringing in the ears? Try and relcocate yourself to rural farm areas, and get a job on a farm. E.g milking cows.. Like in a peaceful environment.

:teeth
*


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## asittingducky (Apr 23, 2013)

WYRD76 said:


> *Yeah I also feel like a sitting duck. If I was a native american and they gave me a ritual name it would probably be sitting duck..
> Im not 23 I am 37, but as a traveler I can tell you if you hate that being watched feeling try avoid living in Iceland or Finland.
> 
> I dont know how to help you, but what I do is totally avoid the MEDIA, like television and stay away from NEWS of any kind, e.g newspapers, CNN reports on the internet. Avoid MEDIA of all kinds.
> ...


It sounds like all your Icelandic and Finnish friends are peeping toms. I hope you're putting on a show for them with all those cows you hang around.


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