# I gave an impromptu speech during CBT Group Therapy



## AlekParker (Oct 31, 2006)

So on Monday I went to my in real life CBT (I also do a CBT Online group over video chat which is the second link in my signature below) and we did some hard core exposures.

For me they randomly chose to have me give an impromptu presentation in front of the other 4 clients and 2 therapists in the group. They gave me a few minutes to go over cognitive thought restructuring/ countering ANTs thoughts etc. Then a couple minutes to prepare. 

I actually almost had a panic attack in anticipation of what we were doing. I was basically breathing rapidly, my heart was beating, my hands felt ice cold and sweaty, i felt like butterflies were in my stomach, I couldn't think straight, my mind was racing but spacey at the same time, I basically felt like running away and never coming back...


In my head I was thinking, this was too much for me to handle, I would fail and mess up and people would laugh at me and it would hurt my self esteem more.

On a scale of 1-100 my anxiety was 90 before doing it and about 80 during.

I did 3 speeches on the same subject, back to back with short breaks (exposures should be done like this because back to back, you realize that the social anxiety goes down drastically) I first did a 2 minute speech then took a break. Then I did another 2 minute speech and the second time I felt my anxiety was a 70/100 ...great improvement in a few minutes.

The third time I had to give a 5 minute speech which as a bit harder. So my anxiety went from 70-80. But we had a question section at the end where they asked me questions and I felt quite confident. My SA was about 50-60 out of 100 at that point. This proves that exposures work, even when I don't think I can prior or during a social situation.

I encourage you all to try to participate in exposures. If you think you can't or impossible, that's just the automatic negative thoughts trying to hold you back. Remember it's OK and actually good to experience some anxiety during the exposures. Heck, I felt like I was going to go into a full panic attack, but was able to give my speeches this past week.

After the exposure I felt great, I actually wanted to stay up there and talk some more. Giving a speech like that, especially impromptu, is something that in my mind I "dread" and think I "cannot handle"... but this experience proved that I CAN DO IT. I can even experience some fear/ panic and still pull through... I accept and am OK with having some social anxiety!! It was a 360 turn around from how I felt immediately prior to the exposure. Woo hooo!!!


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## floatingballoon (Aug 17, 2010)

Eep! I'd faint. Congratulations though! That's awesome!


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## gilt (Jan 7, 2010)

Wow, that is really interesting AlekParker, thanks for posting. And congrats!


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## layitontheline (Aug 19, 2009)

That's wonderful 

I know this is besides the point but I'm curious, what were the topics of your speeches?
And did the other clients have social anxiety as well? Did they have to do speeches or were they given their own personal challenges?


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## AlekParker (Oct 31, 2006)

They had their own individualized assignments. The other 3-4 clients have SA too. The class has been 6-7 sessions so far where we meet for about 2 hours each week.

These 'role plays' are awesome. I dread them like crazy before doing them, but feel better then any drug after I accomplish them. Prior to doing one I feel like running away or quitting, but when I do them i feel like flying or that I'm the freaking MAN! 

3 weeks ago we listed our top 5 fears giving a speech was number one on my fear list. Then we do "Role plays" of them in the class.

Also, I thought I was gonna faint or something when they told me what I had to do. Like I said above the first time I did it was a bit awkward/panicky/uncomfortable. But the 3rd time I did it I owned it! (...well...I still felt a little fear but really did well and I wanted to keep going despite the fear LOL)

BTW I have an online group where we will do things similar to what we do in the class. It's the second link in my signature. Our next meeting is Thursday at 6 PM Pacific Standard (Los Angeles) Time


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