# What if thinking



## Illini_Pride (Apr 25, 2005)

I know for me I always think what if this new person does this, says that, etc. No matter if 99% don't treat me badly.

Now, I was reading a packet my therapist gave me a couple of weeks ago about anticipatory anxiety.

"_Anticipation can be a positive or a negative experience. We can look forward to something knowing that feelings of anxiety and nervousness are to be expected but the upcoming experience could be something wonderful or life changing. Or, we can look ahead with fear and dread, which may lead to avoidance and as a result a missed opportunity. Start choosing your "what if's" carefully. Use them to motivate you. Think of it as: "What if" positive thinking. "What if...you finally get control of your stress, anxiety, and depression?"_

Very inspiring for me. I'm going to keep this in mind.


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## RoyalP (Sep 14, 2008)

you seem to know a lot about social anxiety. Can you tell me if social anxiety can go away or do people deal with it for the rest of their lives?


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## Yalom (Sep 24, 2008)

I know you weren't asking me, but I can probably help. The only disorders which are generally resistant are personality disorders (i.e. histrionic, narcissistic, borderline, etc.), schizophrenia (of course), bipolar disorder, ADHD, and I believe that's just about it. Anxiety disorder are some of the easiest to treat, as long as there isn't something organic going on (though that can often be remediated with medication). The way to treat anxiety is through plain old consistent exposure, such as graded exposure or flooding. This is why cognitive behavioral group therapy is so effective for SA. Though working with cognition is generally helpful, it's mostly just for gaining compliance with exposure therapy. Hopefully that helps


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## Illini_Pride (Apr 25, 2005)

Hi RoyalP,

Yalom is correct with what he posted. As far as having the diagnosis of social phobia, it's possible that one may not meet the criteria for having it anymore. A person can still have some symptoms. It's mostly managed. It can creep up on you again. It's like a person with diabetes or high blood pressure who can be rid of the diagnosis by eating healthier and not needing to take medication. It can come back later though.


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## isis (Apr 30, 2008)

Illini_Pride said:


> I know for me I always think what if this new person does this, says that, etc. No matter if 99% don't treat me badly.
> 
> Now, I was reading a packet my therapist gave me a couple of weeks ago about anticipatory anxiety.
> 
> ...


That sounds useful. I'm gonna try it, thanks for posting.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Since we all have anxiety - part of the human experience - saying someone is "cured" is a loose term. It's more or less a confidence issue. If you can handle things, that is significant.


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