# Do you avoid old friends?



## NoHobbies

You know how when you get older and you don't wanna tell anyone what a loser you are now. I was sitting next to someone I knew as a teenager at physical therapy and I thought it was him but he looked a bit different, but then I saw his name on a piece of paper and knew it was him. I didn't really feel like saying anything. I probably look more like my teenage self and the therapist was calling me by my name so he must have known but he didn't say nothing to me. Old catch up convos are forced I guess and we must have not really wanted to talk.


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## Boomaloom

Yes I do now. It's one of the worst aspects of SAD imo. One of the nicest things 'normal' people experience is running into old friends and acquaintances and being able to catch up and maybe plan a future meetup. 
I recently got a phone call from an old friend I went to high school with and havent seen in about 3/4 years. He said he wanted to catch up, play some games, have some beers, like old times. I was kind of pleased while obviously uncomfortable about swapping life stories. I was prepared to put that aside for the sake of seeing an old friend again. However I later found out that my mother had actually run into him in town earlier that day and told him to give me a call some time. So yeah, it was a pity call. A case of 
"Hi man, listen ill take a couple of hours out of my busy life to come visit you at your parents house and play some games like when we were 15 again, cos your Mom asked to" That was a low for me. I told him I'd ring him back sometime. Dunno when that will be.


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## NoHobbies

Well you don't know he was thinking that


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## ACorvus

My old friends avoid me. They know I am not into drugs anymore and I have been exluded from alnost everything and am now left with no friends.
But the worst is the one good friend I let get on with his life. I am too ashamed to get in contact with him because I know he made the right decisions in life and we are now too different to find that common bond we once had.


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## ilovejehovah777

YESS!! i try to avoid them all the time


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## i suck at life

i try to avoid everyone lol

except for my friends that i still have a lot in common with even tho i dont see them ever. i wouldnt mind hangin with them cuz i know they havnt changed


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## Darktower776

I avoid them for the fact that I am ashamed of where I am in life right now which hasn't changed much from when I was a teenager. I feel like I've been stuck in place while everyone else was just moving on and progressing with their lives.


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## ACorvus

Darktower776 said:


> I avoid them for the fact that I am ashamed of where I am in life right now which hasn't changed much from when I was a teenager. I feel like I've been stuck in place while everyone else was just moving on and progressing with their lives.


Pretty much. That dreaded question "So...what are you doing these days?"
As soon as I hear I go into my well-rehearsed lie or just freeze.


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## loneranger

I try avoiding old friends, but I can't since I have a public job.


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## Boomaloom

NoHobbies said:


> Well you don't know he was thinking that


No, that's true. He's a nice guy and while in my addled head, we havent spoken in years due to my problems, I know that in reality he was a million things going on at the moment (wife, 2 kids plus a new-born, a job and a mortgage to pay) so he has barely time for his own family let alone some guy he palled around with as a care-free teenager. TBH, I want to sort myself out and meet my old friends on neutral ground. I would love to be able to say something, anything, positive about my own situation. But I can't handle the idea of the two of us being compared. It would just highlight the disappointment I am to my folks.



Darktower776 said:


> I avoid them for the fact that I am ashamed of where I am in life right now which hasn't changed much from when I was a teenager. I feel like I've been stuck in place while everyone else was just moving on and progressing with their lives.


Exactly the same. I would really love to catch up with them again. Its not a question of being nervous or anxious. Im sure we would snap back into the old rapport. But it's just the life swapping stories. What can you do when every facet of your life is in tatters? When you havent reached even the most modest milestone that people years your junior have managed. You feel like a massive waste of skin and who wants to bring that on themselves?


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## Darktower776

ACorvus said:


> Pretty much. That dreaded question "So...what are you doing these days?"
> As soon as I hear I go into my well-rehearsed lie or just freeze.





Boomaloom said:


> Exactly the same. I would really love to catch up with them again. Its not a question of being nervous or anxious. Im sure we would snap back into the old rapport. But it's just the life swapping stories. What can you do when every facet of your life is in tatters? When you havent reached even the most modest milestone that people years your junior have managed. You feel like a massive waste of skin and who wants to bring that on themselves?


Yep. I try to avoid relatives I haven't seen in a long time for the same reasons. The first question they always ask is the dreaded "So what have you been up to/doing these days?" Hate it.


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## Princess Gustopher

Ngl but I actually stay far away from the areas where my old friends live :|, especially where my ex lives (we were really good friends and practically best friends when we dated). Sounds ridiculous but I'm to terrified of running into any of them.

Upside, I live 45 minutes away from where they live so it's not hard but still kinda sad since my one friend lives right near there. Avoid her house too like the plague.


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## Perkins

Yep, just about every single friend I've had in the past I avoid. There's a reason they aren't your friends any more. 

I know my childhood sweetheart lives not far from me. Since our moms are still friends and work together, I pretty much know where he frequents and I make it my duty to avoid those places entirely.


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## aquariusrising

I couldn't avoid her 100% because she would show up. This was at high school. Thank goodness I moved away. But she actually lives a few towns away from me...
Hope she rots in hell for what she did and how she treated me


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## Jammer25

I used to have a friend who lived on the street behind my house. We went to the same elementary school. He would stop by sporadically throughout high school and college to chill, watch TV and play basketball at the park, but I always made up an excuse for not being able to go out to a bar or something. He eventually moved a few hours away, and I haven't heard from him in a few years. I still feel bad about shunning him all those times since he seemed pretty loyal about stopping by over the years.



Darktower776 said:


> I avoid them for the fact that I am ashamed of where I am in life right now which hasn't changed much from when I was a teenager. I feel like I've been stuck in place while everyone else was just moving on and progressing with their lives.


Otherwise, this sums it up pretty well for me. I avoid school reunions and networking events like the plague.


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## Fat Man

I run from people I use to be friends with like the plague. Its very frustrating, I want to rekindle the friendship we once had but I'm just so damn shy that it's completely impossible to do so. Many good friends were lost this way


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## AndreaXo

I avoid old private school "friends" that i had when I still went there. They hated me though and would constantly bully me. If I were to run into them now (and ive run into quite a few of them over the past few years) and they knew the state i'm in now, what with the SA, i guess they would smirk to themselves thinking they were right about me all along...


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## Malek

Yes...


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## aquariusrising

Jammer25 said:


> I used to have a friend who lived on the street behind my house. We went to the same elementary school. He would stop by sporadically throughout high school and college to chill, watch TV and play basketball at the park, but I always made up an excuse for not being able to go out to a bar or something. He eventually moved a few hours away, and I haven't heard from him in a few years. I still feel bad about shunning him all those times since he seemed pretty loyal about stopping by over the years.
> 
> Otherwise, this sums it up pretty well for me. I avoid school reunions and networking events like the plague.


I'd rather die than have them all know I'm still a nobody. They all forgot about me a day later and all went onto university and made something of themselves. Instead...there is me.,. The victim of their abuse and I became NOTHING. I can imagine how much silent evil laughter would erupt from inside when they find out...and the outside? Be replaced with a huge self satisfied smirk. 
Except they are going to hell, they have nothing to be happy about. For treating a Christian that way.


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## Greentops

I've been bumping into some old mates, and wished I never. Most of 'em are back stabbers, and general users.

They seem to think I'm the same person they once knew, but I'm not. Really considering moving away and making a fresh start.


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## slowlyimproving

YES! I feel so ashamed.


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## RelinquishedHell

Yeah, I'm too afraid to ever try talking to any of them again.


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## Conviction07

Yes. I can't wait until I move to a new city so I don't have to worry about running into them. :afr


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## mike91

Darktower776 said:


> I avoid them for the fact that I am ashamed of where I am in life right now which hasn't changed much from when I was a teenager. I feel like I've been stuck in place while everyone else was just moving on and progressing with their lives.


Yep same here i was filling up with petrol and went to go pay for it and a guy i knew and was friends with in school was in front of me and he paid for his fuel and stood to the side waiting for me and he said hi to me so i said hi back and keep walking seem him since but he did not talk witch is good


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## SuperSaiyanGod

On the rare times that I do run into old friends, yes, I usually do avoid them.


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## jim11

Yup, they are going to ask about my life and what kind of job I got, which I got none. But most of the time I bumped into them I don't talk to them and they didn't initiate anything either. Just like strangers.


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## iCod

Old friends suck. They only remind you of your bitter past.


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## ThatLonerChick

I tend to avoid a lot of old friends.. because I'm afraid they wouldn't like the "new me". I'm afraid they wouldn't like me how they used to or think I was cool. 
I'm just afraid I'd ruin what they thought of me


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## Nothing123

I avoid them whenever i can. Whenever i do see them i try to make polite chit chat, which is hard for me cos i nervous babble..ugh (but this seems to bore them anyway so i dnt know why i botherin the first place) and also because these ppl grew up in a different type of 'household' to me, they made something of themselves and are doing well now. 

We're like strangers, and i feel insignificant next to them. Without them, im happy being me. So i just avoid. It's not like i care anymore anyway -shrug- They looked down on me in highschool. They can look down on me now. Pfft.


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## green9206

Avoiding old friends is much more difficult when they live nearby you. So i barely even leave my house fearing i might run into them. I am talking like close to 10-15 old friends all living within a 1 mile radius. Its horrible.


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## TuxedoChief

Every single one of them. We completely stopped talking to each other, since the start of High school. 

My closest friend from way back now goes on the same bus as me on certain days, and we just ignore each other. He's chatting with his GF, having a great time, and there I am, looking jealous and miserable, thinking back to the days when that was us.

What make it worse, He only lives a 5 minute walk away.


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## meandernorth

Typically. I moved a while back and don't publicize my social media. While I don't 'avoid' them, I'm not making my presence known.


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## HellCell

Never gotten into contact with one to get a reaction out of me. In my opinion I would try to strike up some small talk.
Jeez everyone here is making old friends as some awkward encounter.. Strange community here..


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## CWe

Oh hell yea i avoid them. I just worry about what they'll ask me and stuff. Feels like it would be very awkward :/


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## bfs

ALL THE TIME. I mainly do it because I don't want to start a conversation where I have to fake being ecstatic to see you and stuff.


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