# I'm OBSESSED with cuddling! Is it normal?



## DarkFox (Mar 13, 2014)

By obsessed, I don't just mean I simply want to cuddle with my boyfriend. Because, well, I don't have one. Every single day when I wake up, I roll my blanket into a ball and cuddle with it. I can do this for hours and I often fall asleep while cuddling with it. I'll pretend like it's someone else; often my best friend (see my first question). When I'm somewhere away from my blanket I'll just fantasize about cuddling with someone, I'll go through all the possible ways of affection in my head. When or if I ever get into a relationship, I don't want sex. I want cuddles above all else. At night, I fall asleep cuddling with my blanket. Sometimes I'll be talking to my friends on Facebook, and out of the blue sometimes I'll say "I wish I was there so I could cuddle you" and they would usually reply with "I wish" and then we'll keep going on and on and on about us cuddling... and I love it. This has been going on for about 4 years now. But even before that, I would CONSTANTLY and I mean CONSTANTLY cuddle and snuggle up to my mom as a kid. So much that she would have to tell me to stop after a while. But ever since puberty I've grown out of that and now it's just boys who I yearn to cuddle. This may sound weird because I'm a girl, but I want to be the big spoon. I'm 15 by the way. Is it normal to think like this? I've been this way since I was 9, it started with cuddling my mom out of the blue and then it switched to boys only. It's weird because when I was 0-5 I HATED being touched by ANYONE. The years in between I was indifferent. Now all I do is cuddle nonstop with my blanket 24/7. Could this be a secondary disorder? Why am I like this?


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## Dalmat (May 5, 2013)

I can't fall asleep if I don't imagine some girl is next to me, I just try to imagine that feeling, without any scenarios in my mind. I have that habit since earlyest childhood, before I even knew anything about those things. That could be very strange, I don't know.
And like you mentioned about sex, I always have to somehow force myself to do it. I'm always more in the cuddling mood when I'm with someone


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## DementedFuschia (Feb 16, 2013)

Maybe it's some sort of fetish..not a sexual fetish but just in general. I don't really think it's a disorder. At least it's not obsessed with sex or something. That's what most of my friends dealt with at your age LOL. It's harmless!


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## em violet (Apr 21, 2011)

i always want to cuddle to..its not a fetish. its more about just being with another person, not sexually, at least for me its about emotions. even if i am in a good mood. its like cuddling is knowing that something or someone is their with u. reminding u that u are alive, that u are a human. for me cuddling is about being able to emotionally connect with some one and just be there with them.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

I loooooove cuddling, if I'm cuddling with a girl in front of a good movie then I'm in heaven. It's been a while since I've cuddled so I'm wanting it pretty bad as well.


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## Raeden (Feb 8, 2013)

They made body pillows for a very good reason.


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

A fun fact about cuddles: it takes 20 seconds of cuddling for the cuddle to cause your brain to release oxytocin. Cuddles should always last at least 20 seconds. You can also give yourself (or your blanket) 20 second+ long cuddles to trick your brain into releasing those chemicals. I guess it's more of a thing I heard than a fact, but I will research it to find out if it's true right now.


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## Fruitcake (Jan 19, 2012)

There are some studies backing up that oxytocin thing and there are also some very angry people on The Internet who want you to know that cuddling is not recommended as a cure to anxiety or depression and should be undertaken as a supplement to other treatment such as medication and therapy.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

Fruitcake said:


> I can't find any clear results on the oxytocin thing but I did find out that there are some very angry people on The Internet who want you to know that cuddling is not recommended as a cure to anxiety or depression and should be undertaken as a supplement to other treatment such as medication and therapy.


Well I personally don't believe the internet and I plan on spending the better part of the rest of my life doing some hands-on research to get this figured out.


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## Caterpillar13 (Nov 10, 2013)

Guys may say they would just like to cuddle u too, but some may really want more...so be careful. Most guys your age are going to be very turned on lying down cuddling u...I'm sure when u say it on facebook to them some are thinking other thoughts...


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## H i (Nov 23, 2013)

To an extent I think it's healthy and has no adverse affects aside from deluding yourself that your blanket is a person. I can't see a reason for this to be a disorder other than you are lonely or it just makes you comfortable and reminds you of your past. Whatever the reason I can't see a reason for you to be concerned with it! I love cuddling too it's one of my favorite things. I can't see it being an issue unless you randomly start cuddling with people.


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## Tomyx (Jun 27, 2013)

I've only gotten to naked cuddle a few times, and it has a lot of power for calming me down and making me feel better, a lot better. I dunno why anyone would want to cuddle with someone if they aren't sexually attracted to them. And if a woman is doing it to a man she's not attracted to, for shame!


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## hypestyle (Nov 12, 2003)

...I just wish I had that special someone.. alas, never..


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## Sleeper92 (Oct 3, 2010)

I sleep with 2 pillows,one is for cuddling and i pretending its a girl.Fuking pathetic


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## chickenfett (Jun 2, 2011)

So long as the thoughts are not interrupted your day to day life its fine. Also, I find it interesting that it's only boys now yet you talk about it with friends. It sounds like you may feel like your lacking intimacy and want that. Could it be possible that you have fears and insecurities regarding sex and instead live out your physically intimate fantasies through cuddling? That is a question.


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## Ninvus (Jun 15, 2014)

Cuddling is amazing. I've been cuddleless for the past half year+ now. That's the one thing I miss most about a relationship, having someone to hold. I wish I had a friend I could snuggle up with every now and then, friend-with-cuddle-benefits. But on top of my already social awkwardness, an awkward request like that is very difficult.


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## Fixxer (Jul 12, 2011)

I do find myself cuddling with my pillows too... and when the pillows aren't big enough, I add the blankets around it to be able to put my hands around it and hold real tight. AS you may guess, I have been single for a LONG time so I am really lacking oxytocin and other bonding chemicals. I Was totally unaware of the oxytocin released during cuddling but I know why I almost always feel like cuddling my pillow at night or in the morning. Pay attention of being willing to cuddle with boys. Make sure you pick up the right people to cuddle with, not just the nearest guy because you want to cuddle so much and your blankets are far away.


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## sonic431 (Jun 30, 2014)

I had a friend in high school who used to have an obsession with hugging people. Mostly women. Found it creepy.


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## Melodic (Apr 16, 2009)

Err, I don't think it's a disorder as such, but maybe a little bit more obsessive than the norm. As long as it's not causing you too much distress or putting you in dangerous situations I'm sure it's fine.


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## lithocardium (Dec 23, 2013)

If you lack loving physical contact then of course it's normal to find a way to simulate it. I'm not proud to admit it, but i've actually pulled one night stands just to be able to cuddle after the sex. 

When I think of women, I don't think of them as sex objects, it's more about sharing love things, cuddling, kissing, caressing, and stuff like that.


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## Ignopius (Mar 19, 2013)

I will cuddle with you! =)


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## sonic431 (Jun 30, 2014)

Raeden said:


> They made body pillows for a very good reason.


LOL this one had me going!!!

On a serious note though I wouldn't mind for awhile. But after that it would get really annoying. Maybe you should get a pet.


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## Nothing123 (Oct 3, 2014)

I don't think its strange at all, in fact, u sound alot like me when i was your age!! Everyone knew that I was a hugger/cuddler and so they used to call me cuddlebunny 

I would say that the cause of ur 'obsession' is because you're trying to get as much affection and love out of someone as you can because, quite possibly, something has happened to make you feel constantly insecure, ands the only way to 'fix' this feeling is to get recognition and affection from others, Again, im not a psychologist.

For me, when my dad left us. I went into a downward spiral of depression for years and i became.. lets see... a tad too 'affectionate' with any guy to gain back some approval and love i felt id lost. Im not saying this is you, i by all means am not saying that you are attention seeking or being '****ty', i'm simply stating that this was the case for me. I also used to cuddle my girlfriends alot. Again, for love and friendship reasons only, to be feel close to someone.

..


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## Nothing123 (Oct 3, 2014)

Once I got hurt too many times i got over it and i rarely hug anymore unless i love and trust that person alot. I think part of my soul is gone haha, who knows.


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## spiritedaway (Aug 5, 2014)

I think I am too. Whenever I lie down, I absolutely have to have a pillow to cuddle with or I won't be able to sleep. I think it's mostly because I crave the comfort of having someone else there but, alas, I do not. If I could, I would probably be able to cuddle all day long.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

DarkFox said:


> But even before that, I would CONSTANTLY and I mean CONSTANTLY cuddle and snuggle up to my mom as a kid.


No psychotherapy needed. We found the source of your obsession. You want to return to the security and comfort of childhood like when you used to snuggle with your mom.


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## TheHopeless (Sep 11, 2013)

Get a sweet baby kitty cat and hug and cuddle and huggle your baby kitty all day long! You need a big ball of fluff to cuddle and snuggle with meow meow!!!


















Nothing wrong with cuddling. Get some more stuffed animals, too. My parents hate animals so until I move out no cuddly pets for me, but I do have a cuddly plush kitty that I cuddle and kiss all the time because it's so soft and sweet!

I can't believe I just wrote that... But I can't deny it. I like to cuddle!


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

Hormones could be a factor.


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## cooperativeCreature (Sep 6, 2010)

On a related note, I sleep better next to things like pillows placed up against my body on both sides. I like to feel enclosed. If it were socially acceptable, I would sleep in a casket.


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## TheHopeless (Sep 11, 2013)

cooperativeCreature said:


> On a related note, I sleep better next to things like pillows placed up against my body on both sides. I like to feel enclosed. If it were socially acceptable, I would sleep in a casket.


You know, you CAN sleep in a casket if you _really_ want to. How many people are actually going to see your bedroom?


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## cooperativeCreature (Sep 6, 2010)

TheHopeless said:


> You know, you CAN sleep in a casket if you _really_ want to. How many people are actually going to see your bedroom?


Ouch.


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

^:lol


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## jc43 (Jul 28, 2014)

This was actually kinda cute :b


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## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

I think cuddling is normal. But wanting to do it all the time might be an issue.


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## projectfear22 (Oct 19, 2014)

<3 Love <3 is never enough. Nuff said <3


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## ShatteredGlass (Oct 12, 2012)

I kind of am too, to be honest. I have two separate categories of crushes, sexual crushes, and romantic crushes. The sexual crushes are more based on sexual fetish based things than romantic interest while romantic crushes are crushes I don't usually have sexual thoughts about, but I fantasize about cuddling and kissing them much more than sexual thoughts. I crave cuddles, but at the same time I hate being touched by 99% of people. The only people I want to cuddle or touch at all are my crushes. I imagine cuddling them while watching a movie, on the bus, in the car, in bed, at school, anywhere.


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## thisismeyo (Feb 15, 2013)

this is why i want a kitten


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## mattmc (Jun 27, 2013)

Not sure how comfortable I would be with indefinitely holding someone or having them hold me... but I still think about it a lot. It's a desire to love, be loved, and to feel that love. Animals cuddle in all sorts of ways. There is nothing wrong with it. Of course if you were cuddling with a guy, they might get hard. I don't say that to be gross or rude. I don't really want sex... but that doesn't mean I can turn that part of my body off. Some guys do want sex and if they got hard, they might pressure you. Then again they might not. Just better to think things through.

In some ways I wish I was a girl. Guys don't really cuddle so unless you have a girlfriend you don't get any cuddles. And heck, maybe she'd want sex. There is plenty of reasons to not want or not be comfortable going that road for both genders. Sometimes we just want cuddles.


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## Bushra (Dec 24, 2014)

Tell me about it


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

That's normal.


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## zomgz (Aug 17, 2009)

Cuddling is where it's at. I wish I could find a cuddle buddy. I don't want a relationship, or sex, or anything else, just someone to cuddle with.


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## Shameful (Sep 5, 2014)

zomgz said:


> Cuddling is where it's at. I wish I could find a cuddle buddy. I don't want a relationship, or sex, or anything else, just someone to cuddle with.


:yes


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## SunshineSam218 (Dec 6, 2013)

No I don't think wanting to cuddle with someone is a bad thing. My boyfriend lives far away with me and when he's not with me, I always find myself cuddling with my pillow. I think it's quite normal for people to want someone to cuddle with.


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## TabbyTab (Oct 27, 2013)

I always dream about cuddling with someone thinking it would be the most amazing thing but the only time I cuddled someone it was hella uncomfortable and they used me as their personal pillow.


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## TabbyTab (Oct 27, 2013)

thisismeyo said:


> this is why i want a kitten


How would you exactly cuddle a kitten without possibly killing it?


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## thisismeyo (Feb 15, 2013)

TabbyTab said:


> How would you exactly cuddle a kitten without possibly killing it?


I'm a gentle, gentle person


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## TabbyTab (Oct 27, 2013)

thisismeyo said:


> I'm a gentle, gentle person


Ah okay. Just making sure. Don't want any kitties getting smushed. I had an ex who killed his kitten cause he sat on it. Sense then I'm now on kitty watch to make sure no kitties get smushed 

I don't know why I told you that it felt relevant lol


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## thisismeyo (Feb 15, 2013)

TabbyTab said:


> Ah okay. Just making sure. Don't want any kitties getting smushed. I had an ex who killed his kitten cause he sat on it. Sense then I'm now on kitty watch to make sure no kitties get smushed
> 
> I don't know why I told you that it felt relevant lol


ahh well I'd be more careful than that  Don't you worry


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## TabbyTab (Oct 27, 2013)

thisismeyo said:


> ahh well I'd be more careful than that  Don't you worry


:yes


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## SneekySnee (Mar 25, 2015)

I don't think there is anything wrong with being obsessed with cuddles. I am a boy but i am the same. I am single and i long for cuddles all the time. I don't know how normal it is but i think it is something lots of people who share this love for cuddles


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## Riri11 (Mar 24, 2013)

DarkFox said:


> By obsessed, I don't just mean I simply want to cuddle with my boyfriend. Because, well, I don't have one. Every single day when I wake up, I roll my blanket into a ball and cuddle with it. I can do this for hours and I often fall asleep while cuddling with it. I'll pretend like it's someone else; often my best friend (see my first question). When I'm somewhere away from my blanket I'll just fantasize about cuddling with someone, I'll go through all the possible ways of affection in my head. When or if I ever get into a relationship, I don't want sex. I want cuddles above all else. At night, I fall asleep cuddling with my blanket. Sometimes I'll be talking to my friends on Facebook, and out of the blue sometimes I'll say "I wish I was there so I could cuddle you" and they would usually reply with "I wish" and then we'll keep going on and on and on about us cuddling... and I love it. This has been going on for about 4 years now. But even before that, I would CONSTANTLY and I mean CONSTANTLY cuddle and snuggle up to my mom as a kid. So much that she would have to tell me to stop after a while. But ever since puberty I've grown out of that and now it's just boys who I yearn to cuddle. This may sound weird because I'm a girl, but I want to be the big spoon. I'm 15 by the way. Is it normal to think like this? I've been this way since I was 9, it started with cuddling my mom out of the blue and then it switched to boys only. It's weird because when I was 0-5 I HATED being touched by ANYONE. The years in between I was indifferent. Now all I do is cuddle nonstop with my blanket 24/7. Could this be a secondary disorder? Why am I like this?





Dalmat said:


> I can't fall asleep if I don't imagine some girl is next to me, I just try to imagine that feeling, without any scenarios in my mind. I have that habit since earlyest childhood, before I even knew anything about those things. That could be very strange, I don't know.
> And like you mentioned about sex, I always have to somehow force myself to do it. I'm always more in the cuddling mood when I'm with someone


well look at that, you two seem to be perfect for each other:heart


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## DistraughtOwl (Mar 1, 2014)

I want a cuddle buddy :c


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## Cmasch (Jan 24, 2015)

Cuddles for everyone, you get a cuddle, you get a cuddle, A CUDDLE FOR YOU


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## forgetmylife (Oct 1, 2011)

perhaps you need an oxytocin antagonist lols

wow. I was jk'ing, but apparently such a thing exists and it's called Atosiban...


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## egkor (Apr 20, 2015)

I yearn for long, loving cuddles. Haven't had that in a long long while.


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## Orbiter (Jul 8, 2015)

Would be very healthy for me...


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