# Feeling like everyone is talking bad about you or doesn't like you?



## pumpkins

This is probably my biggest problem. I'm always afraid people are talking about me behind my back or that I did or didn't do something and everyone hates me.

Another thing is (and I know this is kind of childish) when someone deleted me on facebook, I'm always wondering what I did. My statues are usually positive and uplifting, but I always think that I'm just annoying, so they deleted me. Or they're like "She's weird and annoying" or something like that, so they delete me. It's mostly people I went to school with or met a few times but never actually talked to them. I've just seen them around when I was in school. :/ & not to mention if I do see them in like a store or something, I don't say hi, I don't wave, and I hardly look at them. I actually try to make it look like I didn't notice them or so they can't notice me.


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## Ironpain

Two words Low Self Esteem (well three if you count Self Esteem as one word . You've created this negative perception about yourself from a rejection in the past or something someone said and you continue to play those thoughts in your mind over and over and over, because that part of your brain that holds onto old memories that part of your brain triggers these negative self perceptions. 

What your thinking comes from a feeling of worthlessness and a self defeating attitude, you reject yourself before others can reject you as a defense mechanism, you see everyone as talking bad about you or not liking you because you deep down you don't like yourself very much, you think others look at you the way you look at yourself. 

What you have is a case of very low self esteem and what you need is more Cowbell jk  laugh, lighten up your so self conscious that you project this perception of yourself onto others. If you frown or look away from people people are going to look away from you. 

You know how many times I've heard someone say the same thing nobody likes them or they get ignored, you know what that's a bunch of crap, who cares if someone wants to delete you over something petty let them, don't fluster yourself worrying about appeasing people that reject you or don't give you the time of day because let me tell you something. 

There's someone out there who wants to get to know you, you have to show them your personality, your attitude, look for people who share common interest in you and who make you comfortable, stop beating yourself up man it's very un healthy take it from me it can really do damage to you, I was you once, always so self conscious. 

If you worry about what will be you'll never live for today. Start living for now, make friends here, practice your communication skills. Hi, read their profiles finding some common ground, ask them about something they posted etc; Join a social anxiety group. Nobody is talking about you, people are too busy living their own lives to focus on yours and what you do.


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## Wesses

i have low self esteem and so I have a lot of what you are mentioning. I can't advice you anything, but I hope we can both work on it and get better.


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## pumpkins

Woah, I really needed to hear that. Thank you, honestly.

It is very hard for me to be myself and accept myself as I am.

I start CBT in a little less then two weeks & I hope it helps. But thank you again. <3


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## Aly

wow.. this is exactly how I feel. I guess we're just paranoid people.
It's all in our heads.


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## Socialanxiety11

I have this problem too. I remember when i had myspace (when it was actually relevant lol), someone deleted me. I wondered what I did. I feel like everyone hates me because of my ugly face.


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## calichick

That's a huge problem for me too, I lived abroad in France with a host family and I half understood the language so I was *convinced* that everyone was talking about me..I would catch my name every now and then and my stomach would drop.


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## jay l

i feel the same way. 
if people delete me on facebook or dont accept my friend request, i wonder "what the hell is wrong with me?" and it just ends up bringing me down.


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## Boring Loser

I'm even afraid of people saying good things about me behind my back, because I am afraid they are talking about me as the person I used to be 5 years ago but am not anymore now. Or I am afraid they are making me seem like something else I'm not, but what they think i am.

A long time ago I used to delete people from my friendlist all the time, because I was afraid they would delete me so i deleted them first. I can imagine how many people's feelings i hurt doing that. But I wasn't thinking that back then. I was thinking, "this person doesn't like me. I might as well delete them before they delete me."


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## InfiniteBlaze

Second semester of my HS sophomore year. Paranoid as a mother****er. I remember wanting to punch more than half the kids at my school in the face.


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## Zamsin

I feel the same way you described and iam used to it! It's kinda awkward but our own perceptions can sabotage our self esteem.


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## SpiderInTheCorner

pumpkins said:


> This is probably my biggest problem. I'm always afraid people are talking about me behind my back or that I did or didn't do something and everyone hates me.
> 
> Another thing is (and I know this is kind of childish) when someone deleted me on facebook, I'm always wondering what I did. My statues are usually positive and uplifting, but I always think that I'm just annoying, so they deleted me. Or they're like "She's weird and annoying" or something like that, so they delete me. It's mostly people I went to school with or met a few times but never actually talked to them. I've just seen them around when I was in school. :/ & not to mention if I do see them in like a store or something, I don't say hi, I don't wave, and I hardly look at them. I actually try to make it look like I didn't notice them or so they can't notice me.


so you call them friends even though you've just seen them a few times at school? that's not friends. not until you talk to them and spend some time together with them and get to know them better.

don't worry too much about it. that kind of friendship will never last


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## Farideh

I wouldn't go into assuming. That can give you the loss of making a friend. I've had some people in the past verbally attack me assuming I was badmouthing them when really, I don't even care what others are doing with their life to begin with.


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## Andyj

So I've experienced something that sounds similar in my life and its something that I'm still working through. A few people have correctly noted that low self esteem and even social anxiety does come down to your thoughts and the way that you think of others and yourself. The key is to change your thoughts about yourself and others - this will lead to a more positive outlook and more confident behaviour. However this is really hard to do on your own. Here's a link to a really good resource. Check out the social anxiety and the self esteem workbooks. They may take some work but you'll get good results.

http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/consumers.cfm


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## Babyboo12

Yeah me took in my case people really hate me bc I'm an outsider lame person I just pretty much don't care what they think anymore I'm not concerned anymore if they delete me or not :|


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## megsy00

Oh jeez, I'm the exact same way.. I hate it! Always thinking people are thinking bad things or talking about me.. Once I get a feeling that someone thinks poorly of me I try to avoid them in the future... A lot of the time I'm sure it's not true but it's a serious problem I have.


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