# Scared to drive...



## Shygirl427 (May 25, 2008)

I have my liscense and a car. Although, I can make myself do it. There are moments when I'm driving that I will panic. Thinking bad thoughts like " I'm driving to slow", " those behind me must think I'm a bad driver". These thoughts could affect my driving in that I will speed up unnecessarily and I just want to get there as soon as possible. I really wish I could relax and enjoy being out but I can't. And when I do go somewhere it's stressful for me because I think about where I should park and how I will enter and leave.

Any advice for me? Can I overcome this or should a face the fact that I'm a bad driver and always will be? :|


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## spartan7 (Feb 25, 2011)

Take a benzo before you drive, itll help promise.


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## Melinda (Feb 5, 2009)

I struggle with this all the time. The way I deal with it is planning ahead. If I'm going into the city I go online first and figure out where it is exactly and where the nearest (and least expensive) parking garage is.


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## spartan7 (Feb 25, 2011)

Just takea benzo thats all so u can chillax with the relax


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## Shygirl427 (May 25, 2008)

bluedragon said:


> Stop caring so much, I dont. I have the same thoughts about driving slow but I still like driving.I simply won't go faster to satisfy them, unless they're too close to me. Why do you care so much?If there's something you need to work on then practice.But i don't understand how someone can be a bad driver, it's easy.


Yeah, it's not so easy for some ppl. Wish it were as easy for me as it is for you. But, I am going to practice. Thanks!


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## shanghaikate (Dec 13, 2010)

I've had this phobia myself, and it got so bad that I barely could drive and would have panic attacks at the mere thought!

In my case, I moved to China and had the phobia go away when I went back to visit. I think it was because the driving is INSANE here and the States seem mild by comparison!

Good luck to you. I know it's no fun to deal with!


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## Shygirl427 (May 25, 2008)

shanghaikate said:


> I've had this phobia myself, and it got so bad that I barely could drive and would have panic attacks at the mere thought!
> 
> In my case, I moved to China and had the phobia go away when I went back to visit. I think it was because the driving is INSANE here and the States seem mild by comparison!
> 
> Good luck to you. I know it's no fun to deal with!


Thanks  and I'm congrats to conquering your fear as well.


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## secretlyshecries (Sep 10, 2009)

All this family stuff happened in the middle of me leaning to drive so for maybe a year or so I haven't gone back to it. I was a bit nervous too. I was fine out on isolated country roads but anytime we got closer to town, I felt a bit freaked. Now the thought of going back to driving is a bit scary. Not so much the 'driving' part but remembering all the road rules and going down really busy roads. I always just think, what if I crash? (I suppose my sister writing off two cars probably doesn't give me peace of mind, lol). I'm getting so fed up with having to walk everywhere though, and that's only once I've been given a ride into town; I live too far out in the country to get there on foot. I should just do this thing properly and get a driving instructor, and not have to rely on either of my parents. I wonder if when I'm finally driving it all the time if my dad will stop using it all the time, even though he has his own car. At least when I'm driving myself around I won't have to rely on other people so much, and I can become just that little bit more independent. I won't have to deal with the weird reactions people have when I tell them I don't have my license either. :roll


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## Positive (Jun 29, 2009)

Benzo while driving is the worst!

With driving it's a confidence factor. You're going to have to practice 24/7 until you feel confident. I've been through situations where I've been in accidents and it is traumatizing. Have a coach or someone in the car.


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## AHolivier (Aug 6, 2009)

I have a license, but I have yet to drive on my own. I don't have a car, and the reason I pushed myself to go to driving school and to the dmv was that my learner's permit was set to expire. I passed my driving test a week before my learner's expired. 
That was 4 years ago. The roads, the lanes, the signs, the lights...all of it doesn't make sense to me.


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## MsMusic (Jan 31, 2011)

It's really hard. I've gotten my permit 4 times already. I just can't seem to relax when I'm driving. I think you have to learn with someone who understands you and what makes you nervous. I hate hearing 'don't be nervous' or 'relax'. Yeah, it's easy for them but for some of us with anxiety, it can be pretty tough. I don't know how I'm going to practice.


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## rosettas stoned (Jan 16, 2011)

The only way to overcome it is to just keep doing it. I used to be really scared of driving as well, and I'd sweat pretty profusely whenever I drove, but I eventually got over it. I actually really enjoy driving now, but for the first year or so, I absolutely hated it.


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## Haydsmom2007 (Oct 16, 2009)

I am scared of driving too. Mostly just on highways. Every time a cars break lights come on I freak out and think traffic is going to come to a screeching halt. and I'm just always scared the other drivers are going to veer off into my lane and hit me. 

I don't really know what to do about it... I wasn't planning on doing anything. lol.


I haven't always been like this. I was a total dare devil when I was 16 and first started driving... I think I started being all nervous after I got rear-ended a year ago. I'm just terrified of being in an accident. The entire time I'm driving all I can think about is how much it would suck to get into an accident. And everytime I'm in the car with someone else driving, I'm always on edge, watching the road and freaking out whenever they get to close to the person in front of them, etc.


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## velocicaur (Aug 8, 2009)

As long as you go the speed limit, you shouldn't worry too much about other drivers. Set the cruise 2 or 3 over, and everything will be fine and dandy. 

If you're on the highway, pass like you're trying to pass someone. Nothing gets me going like an idiot passing a semi going 1 mph faster than the semi. Speed up, pass them, and move over. If you can see the headlights in your rear view mirror, plenty of room and shift over and readjust your speed.

As far as other things, I can't think of many. Pulling into traffic may be an issue; know how your car accelerates. If there is sufficient room, pull out and put on the throttle. This comes with practice - gauging distance and speed of the other cars.

As far as parking, I imagine that is with city parking which is a pain in the neck. If the area is safe, you could drive with someone else at an off time - later at night, early morning and scope it out a few times to get to know the area. Just pay attention to the street signs and such so that when it's more busy, you know where you're going. Look at googlemaps or something before you go, and start looking at the road names. They don't change. After a few practice runs and a little "studying," you'll know where to park in no time. 

Have fun!


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## CMPS (Jul 10, 2011)

There are times I get nervous when people are behind me, but there are also times I simply don't give a crap.

I only drive around my town and portions of the county, and 30 miles to my school. I'm comfortable in familiar places, but I get real nervous driving on highways and in unfamiliar locations. Cities, forget about it. 

The only advice I can give to you is to practice. You'll get more comfortable with more experience.


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## shanghaikate (Dec 13, 2010)

Emerald said:


> Thanks  and I'm congrats to conquering your fear as well.


Thank you! Any progress?


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## Shygirl427 (May 25, 2008)

shanghaikate said:


> Thank you! Any progress?


Yes, in the last two weeks I've been practicing my driving. Ive only done it twice but I hope to keep it up so that I'm much more comfortable behind the wheel. And it seems to be working too. Now, I feel alittle bit more confident in my driving ( I struggle with my turns and driving/parking in reverse) minus one setback that happened yesterday. But I'm trying desperately to focus on my improvements and not what I did wrong. I look at is as an opportunity to learn how to be a better driver. Although right now, I admit that I suck at driving :|


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## Iamjohn (Aug 16, 2010)

The fact you're able to get behind the wheel of a car and drive at all is a huge achievement, it's more than I can do. My fear is I'd actually accidentally kill someone or an animal. I know that sounds like a joke, but I'm serious. It would be a constant fear. 

People can be such ***** on the road I'm not surprised you could feel intimidated. All I could suggest is sticking to the speed limit. I know it irritates a lot of other drivers but at least you can tell yourself you're sticking to the law and therefore nobody has the right to complain or criticise. As for parking, everyone hates parking. I wonder though if you can purchases those parking sensors seperatly, you know the ones that bleep as you're reversing to tell you how close you are to the car behind? I suspect if you installed them you'd be less anxious about parking.


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## IcedOver (Feb 26, 2007)

Iamjohn said:


> The fact you're able to get behind the wheel of a car and drive at all is a huge achievement, it's more than I can do. My fear is I'd actually accidentally kill someone or an animal. I know that sounds like a joke, but I'm serious. It would be a constant fear.


Me, too. The most driving I've ever done is in a school parking lot for about twenty feet. I've pretty much decided that I'll never drive. Strangely, though, I feel I could drive a moped or a motorcycle, although they are even more dangerous.


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## Shygirl427 (May 25, 2008)

Iamjohn said:


> The fact you're able to get behind the wheel of a car and drive at all is a huge achievement, it's more than I can do. My fear is I'd actually accidentally kill someone or an animal. I know that sounds like a joke, but I'm serious. It would be a constant fear.
> 
> People can be such ***** on the road I'm not surprised you could feel intimidated. All I could suggest is sticking to the speed limit. I know it irritates a lot of other drivers but at least you can tell yourself you're sticking to the law and therefore nobody has the right to complain or criticise. As for parking, everyone hates parking. I wonder though if you can purchases those parking sensors seperatly, you know the ones that bleep as you're reversing to tell you how close you are to the car behind? I suspect if you installed them you'd be less anxious about parking.


I have that fear too but I also fear that if I don't drive i will literally be home all of the time. And i can no longer do public transportation after doing so for so long. I have had a couple of close calls that would suggest that i stop driving but I'm determined to get it right! But your right, alot of the times I feel like I'm making the other drivers angry for driving at the speed limit. But I think I'll take your advice and remind myself that I'm obeying the law :yes

And great idea about buying a parking sensor. I never thought of that but I will def look into it.


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## max87 (Aug 7, 2010)

Emerald said:


> I have my liscense and a car. Although, I can make myself do it. There are moments when I'm driving that I will panic. Thinking bad thoughts like " I'm driving to slow", " those behind me must think I'm a bad driver". These thoughts could affect my driving in that I will speed up unnecessarily and I just want to get there as soon as possible. I really wish I could relax and enjoy being out but I can't. And when I do go somewhere it's stressful for me because I think about where I should park and how I will enter and leave.
> 
> Any advice for me? Can I overcome this or should a face the fact that I'm a bad driver and always will be? :|


I am going through the excat same thing


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## CoreyX (May 19, 2011)

It's weird, because while I'm anxious walking and stuff. Once I'm on the road, I'm totally outgoing. I admittedly drive a tad on the crazy side and probably draw attention to my self (I've gotten a few comments from people at school that I drive fast. In a positive way). I pass usually at least 2 people on my 20 mile drive to school every day back and forth. I ride bumpers and drive fast. I really don't care when I'm on the road, it's a great feeling. I don't know what comes over me, one time this dude was going like 20 in a 55, and I passed him and lifted a middle finger going by, lol. I usually have my music cranked up to the max, and people can hear it loud and clear when I'm in town. It makes me feel good, I have the power and control right in my hands. 

I don't consider myself a good driver. I've gotten two complaints from police (no ticket, luckily). But I don't care, I can express myself and drive how I want and piss people off on the road and not care. I love it!


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

I hate driving. I dont have my license yet, but my parents are telling me I have to get it in 3 weeks. Im so stressed out its not even funny. I wish things would come easier, like it is for normal people


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## super (Sep 9, 2009)

im getting my full license soon, only thing im worried about is the exam which i have to parallel park in.

i ****ing hate tailgaters though, next time they do it im going to flip them off, im not so anxious when im in the car. when i first started driving i was a bit anxious, this is how anxiety works but the more you do it the less 'scary' it is the less you care.

keep doing it


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## miss amazin (Sep 30, 2011)

I've totaled two cars in three years. After the last wreck I started getting panic attacks and overly anxious when I'm around traffic and on highways. Back roads aren't so bad. I started going to my therapist and it's getting easier. It's just takes time. Remember to relax, do what you feel comfortable doing. Others can either wait or go around. Here are my tips that help me a lot! 1) jam out to some awesome music you like. Turn it up and sing and dance to it, it'll help keep your mind busy. 2) deep breath in through your nose....... Out through your mouth. And repeat =) just remember to breath and know that it will get easier with time. Feel free to pm me and let me know how your doin, or if you just want to chat it up and clear your mind!


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## Metal_Heart (Feb 11, 2009)

This is exactly the reason why I'm scared of taking lessons, I'm afraid I'll panic at the traffic lights or at roundabouts, and will end up crashing cause of my anxiety.. or I'll just end up letting people pass me all day long because I'm _too nice_ lol.

I guess the thing to remember is that there are sooo many careless bad drivers out there, that couldn't give a crap about how badly they drive.. and people will always get road rage or do things on the road that's considered rude. So compared to all those bad drives out there, the fact you are a considerate one is at least something... and if people beep you or whatever.. it's nothing personal.. people are just impatient and obnoxious. You're probably not as bad a driver as you think too, and the more you practise the more second nature it will become  or so I'm told 

Good luck


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## theCARS1979 (Apr 26, 2010)

Good luck with driving Emerald, and you'll get there. Take one step at a time


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## Aries33 (Sep 22, 2011)

i worry about when i drive other driver will think i have no idea what im doing, every time i head for a red light i feel as though everybody is staring at me, im so self-conscious, what ive found helpful is focus on positive things about yourself eg: im driving within the speed limits, im a good driver since i passed my drivers test this means i can drive independently,i think when you try your best to focus more on your own driving while giving everybody else plenty of space things will look up, me on the other hand im socially afraid to see other driver pass me, i hate looking at there faces


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## Ohnoes2191 (Aug 26, 2011)

As bad as it sounds, I'm glad to know I'm not the only one. I still don't have my license, I'm scared to drive :/


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## lilwheats (Oct 3, 2011)

*your not alone*

I can relate to all you peeps.My anxiety was so bad when i was younger i did'nt get my license till i was 27 and i'm 33 now.I still feel very anxious driving sometimes especially if it's an area i have not driven through before or merging onto a freeway.

My advice is just keep at it.For a long time i was so overwhelmed i would sweat buckets and my hands would shake but i made myself keep at it.Sure enough the more i did it the more confident and relaxed i felt.I have also recently bought a talking gps which is a godsend.It has a little screen that shows you where you are and where you are going and also tells you,helps alot!


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## 8love8 (Sep 11, 2011)

I took a sleeping pill once as I was planning to go to bed & I forgot I did...I went to the store to pick up a few things & I started to drive terrible...I couldn't understand why I was driving so bad...Well, I hit a mailbox with my mirror & it rip it off...I went home & I realized that indeed I took a sleeping pill no wonder I was driving all crazy...Good thing I didn't hurt anyone...


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## boubou (Sep 19, 2011)

take pleasure in being the ahole that slows everyone down, thats what i do.

I keep dreaming about not having breaks on the highway its fkn scary.


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## FTFADIA (Jul 26, 2011)

I've always had anxiety driving but I can manage most of the time. I just try to relax and not worry about other people. Though I do hate it when other people pull up beside me and feel like they are staring at me, so I pretend to play with the radio. Don't know why I do that.


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## hyeran (Oct 9, 2011)

Emerald said:


> Thinking bad thoughts like " I'm driving to slow", " those behind me must think I'm a bad driver". These thoughts could affect my driving in that I will speed up unnecessarily and I just want to get there as soon as possible. |


Its the same for me.. I have my license and I have no choice but to drive to school... I sometimes get really scared driving but I just listen to classical music.


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## ktblanchard07 (Dec 7, 2013)

:yes Dude, I was sooooooooo freakin scared to drive. I had everybody around me tellin me that I couldn't drive, couldn't drive, I was an idiot that couldn't drive. Well, I was pushed by my parents to finallyyyyyyy get my license at 23! Not too long after that, I bought my own car. AND I LOVE IT NOW! I might get a bit nervous now and then, but I think everybodyyyyyy does, minus my boyfriend lol. Just be careful, and drive at the speed you want to. I was scared to go more than 45 mph for like 2 days lol... SCREW WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK!!!!!!!!!! "WHAT OTHER PPL THOUGHT" WAS THE REASON WHY I DEVELOPED SUCH A FEAR OF DRIVING IN THE FIRST PLACE. They were the reason why I believed myself to be an idiot. It is sooooo nice to whip around in my own car now! If I don't wanna be somewhere, I CAN LEAVE BABY!!!!!!!! 

Yeah, I've only been driving 6 months and I still am a lil weary of where I park bc I have those same thoughts, but I'm getting better and better! I went from parking in the Wal-Mart parking lot (bc I thought I would hit my co-workers cars), to parking in my job's parking lot. I can park between two vehicles, and dammit, I'm proud of myself. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT'S THE BEST PART.... I NEVER REALLY HAD ANYBODY WHO GAVE ME CONFIDENCE TO DRIVE. WHENEVER I WENT DRIVE WITH SOMEONE (WHICH I CAN COUNT ON MY FINGERS), I WAS ALWAYS PUT TO SHAME. BUT SCREW THEM! CUZ I TAUGHT MYSELF!! SO IF YOU'RE SCARED TO DRIVE, DONTTTTTT BE!!!!! YOU GOT THIS!!!! YOU JUST THINK YOU DONT BC YOU BELIEVE THE SUCKY PEOPLE THT SURROUND YOUR LIFE!!!!!! PPL SUCK!!!! JUST DRIVE BY YOURSELF! YOU WILL BE SURPRISED AT HOW GOOD OF A DRIVER YOU ARE.

AND PRAY TO ST. RAPHAEL. HE'S THE GUARDIAN ANGEL OF TRAVELING AND HE SAVED ME A FEW TIMES ALREADY.

I WAS SCARED OF FAILURE... BUT GUESS WHAT... FAILURE IS MUCH BETTER THAN THE FEAR OF IT. SCREW WHAT PPL THINK!!!!!!!! TELL EM HOW IT IS! IF THEY CANT RESPECT YOUR FEELINGS, FORGET THEM!!


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## nothing else (Oct 27, 2013)

ya I'm not a big fan. Especially when there are lots of passengers.


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## Lodestar (Nov 17, 2013)

Learning to drive is one of my biggest goals I need to accomplish asap. I tried several years ago and got in around 15 hours or so but I felt no improvement at all apart from between my first and second times out. I'm way too uncoordinated to drive properly. I had a few near misses and started having dreams every second night about running people over. One thing that makes it even more difficult is that I freak out if I can't see the bonnet of the car, which is the case in pretty much all new vehicles. But where I live, you pretty much need to drive unless you want to take terrible public transport everywhere and get crammed inside carriages so you can barely breathe, which isn't the best thing for a social anxiety sufferer.


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## nataliej (Sep 23, 2013)

nothing else said:


> ya I'm not a big fan. Especially when there are lots of passengers.


Yeah, me too. I find it extremely hard to concentrate on the road when someone is talking to me.


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## SunshineSam218 (Dec 6, 2013)

Emerald said:


> I have my liscense and a car. Although, I can make myself do it. There are moments when I'm driving that I will panic. Thinking bad thoughts like " I'm driving to slow", " those behind me must think I'm a bad driver". These thoughts could affect my driving in that I will speed up unnecessarily and I just want to get there as soon as possible. I really wish I could relax and enjoy being out but I can't. And when I do go somewhere it's stressful for me because I think about where I should park and how I will enter and leave.
> 
> Any advice for me? Can I overcome this or should a face the fact that I'm a bad driver and always will be? :|


I'm sorry your struggling with this, I don't have any helpful advice but I have fear of driving myself. Just wanted to let you know that your not alone.


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

Would listening to music help? Really focus on the lyrics when you drive, and just do your best to drive safely, and if you make a mistake, well, it happens.


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## renegade disaster (Jul 28, 2009)

this is one of the things I fear about learning to drive.


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