# Would you date a guy



## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

who is almost 32 and live with his parents and is the opposite of social and spends his time playing video games and sleeping and will never meet your friends or parents since he is lacks social skills and friendliness and is an introvert and lacks self esteem due to his ugly face that has permanent acne scars that can't be cured


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## TheInvisibleHand (Sep 5, 2015)

Probably not....unless she is fat.


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## quirkiful (Feb 27, 2016)

I need to know more! Tell me something positive about this guy. Is he nice? Would he care about me?


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

quirkiful said:


> I need to know more! Tell me something positive about this guy. Is he nice? Would he care about me?


No, he doesn't trust people since he was abused as a kid


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## Ominous Indeed (Sep 6, 2015)

quirkiful said:


> I need to know more! Tell me something positive about this guy. Is he nice? Would he care about me?


Let me help you out, he sometimes posts funny posts, and he loves animals.

Funny + loving animals + he probably plays some kind of instrument.

This is your man ladies..


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## quirkiful (Feb 27, 2016)

MobiusX said:


> No, he doesn't trust people since he was abused as a kid


Well, then I would date him to show that he could trust me.



Demon Soul said:


> Let me help you out, he sometimes posts funny posts, and he loves animals.
> 
> Funny + loving animals + he probably plays some kind of instrument.
> 
> This is your man ladies..


Sounds like my kinda guy


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## vsaxena (Apr 17, 2015)

No way, honey. My mayne has gotta have a J.O.B.! *finger snap*






J/K!

PS: I hope quirkiful is serious about getting to know you, MobiusX! *fingers crossed for you*!!!!


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## ZombieIcecream (Nov 30, 2014)

If he will never work to improve himself / life then probably not.


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## Amphoteric (Sep 11, 2011)

I was sure you had recently already made this same exact thread before so I found the other "Would you date a guy" but I see you changed the OP a bit so I guess that's okay then.

Anyway, carry on.


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## quirkiful (Feb 27, 2016)

vsaxena said:


> No way, honey. My mayne has gotta have a J.O.B.! *finger snap*
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I thought this was all hypothetical? lol but I'm open-minded



ZombieIcecream said:


> If he will never work to improve himself / life then probably not.


That makes sense. Excessive self-pity is bad. But maybe the guy just needs motivation through a relationship?


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

quirkiful said:


> Well, then I would date him to show that he could trust me.
> 
> Sounds like my kinda guy


I dont play any instruments and have no talents and I'm not funny


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## ZombieIcecream (Nov 30, 2014)

quirkiful said:


> Well, then I would date him to show that he could trust me.
> 
> Sounds like my kinda guy


It's not that simple with people like that since it stems from childhood.


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## quirkiful (Feb 27, 2016)

ZombieIcecream said:


> It's not that simple with people like that since it stems from childhood.


I'm sure that a meaningful relationship with someone would help though, right? If not a romantic one, than at least a friendly one.


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## vsaxena (Apr 17, 2015)

quirkiful said:


> I'm sure that a meaningful relationship with someone would help though, right? If not a romantic one, than at least a friendly one.


Exactly! A lot of folks act like socially anxious and awkward guys must NOT get in a relationship until they rectify whatever problems face them.

Pshhh. Countless evidence shows that people function better when in relationships -- that having their other half (wifey, hubby) by their side can be very good for their soul and betterment.

I mean, if people want to be alone, then power to them. But shoot, guys like Mobius and I want a woman, bubbaboom bubbaboom!


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## nepnep247 (Feb 25, 2016)

if they were nice and i was attracted to them (im not of that sexuality)


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## quirkiful (Feb 27, 2016)

vsaxena said:


> Exactly! A lot of folks act like socially anxious and awkward guys must NOT get in a relationship until they rectify whatever problems face them.
> 
> Pshhh. Countless evidence shows that people function better when in relationships -- that having their other half (wifey, hubby) by their side can be very good for their soul and betterment.
> 
> I mean, if people want to be alone, then power to them. But shoot, guys like Mobius and I want a woman, bubbaboom bubbaboom!


It makes sense though; how are people supposed to become less socially anxious if they're rejected from relationships because of their social anxiety? IT'S A LOGICAL CIRCLE OF DOOM

And I hope you and Mobius get your women! lol xD


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## Mr Fluff (Sep 16, 2014)

I'm in a relationship (and I'm old) but I will play along in a hypothetical way...



*is almost 32 and lives with his parents* - not important
*is the opposite of social* - I'm not social either
*spends his time playing video games and sleeping* - as long as it never interfered with our ability to spend time together
*will never meet your friends or parents* - not important
*he is lacks social skills and friendliness* - _only _a problem if he's mean, rude, bigoted etc.
*is an introvert* - so am I, so it's preferred
*lacks self esteem* - this is a turn off _only if _it causes him to act differently to impress others or to blame everyone else for his problems, otherwise it's okay (too much self-esteem is far worse)
*ugly face that has permanent acne scars that can't be cured* - acne scars are fine
 *doesn't trust people since he was abused as a kid *- I was too so I know how hard it is
 *no talents* - most people don't / not important
*not funny* - most people aren't / not important


I think you're correct in thinking the average female who shares none of those characteristics wouldn't go for you -- people like sameness. 
But you're wrong if you think that _all _females would write you off completely based on the above list.


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## lonerroom (May 16, 2015)

MobiusX said:


> who is almost 32 and live with his parents and is the opposite of social and spends his time playing video games and sleeping and will never meet your friends or parents since he is lacks social skills and friendliness and is an introvert and lacks self esteem due to his ugly face that has permanent acne scars that can't be cured


It sounds like you don't want to even try to help yourself in other ways, sure your social anxiety prevents you from going out and doing things, but you also don't want to try to use your mind for other things you can do in your own room, you could try to be creative, try to write, draw take a hobby that can have some purpose, make up short stories, at least you can try to come up with your own material. There is nothing wrong with a girl dating a 32-year-old who lives with his parents and has no job, but if you won't even try to have some creativity, not even a little bit, then you are hopeless. Just use your mind more, don't waste your brain.


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## quirkiful (Feb 27, 2016)

Holds The Key said:


> I'm in a relationship (and I'm old) but I will play along in a hypothetical way...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


This is an impressive analysis. Kudos to you!


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## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)

no, because I know he is the kind of guy who makes the same topics on sas about how no girl likes him.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

I wouldn't care if a guy didn't want to meet my parents. I might prefer that, actually.


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## tehuti88 (Jun 19, 2005)

How many times can you ask the same question, and why...? :| Are you expecting different answers?


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## sentencegenerator (Feb 6, 2016)

No. But I would date a girl like this.


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## Junimoon11 (Mar 17, 2014)

I feel like that would be a very negative, emotionally draining relationship only because I am somewhat similar... so no.


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## JustThisGuy (Mar 24, 2012)

To change the world, you must change yourself.


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## vsaxena (Apr 17, 2015)

quirkiful said:


> It makes sense though; how are people supposed to become less socially anxious if they're rejected from relationships because of their social anxiety? IT'S A LOGICAL CIRCLE OF DOOM
> 
> And I hope you and Mobius get your women! lol xD


*facepalm*

I humbly disagree with you, Quirki, but I like you too much to slam you into smithereens right now, ;-).

Instead I shall say this: GO DO YOUR HOMEWORK, YOUNG LADY, ;-).


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## Rains (Jan 20, 2016)

Not unless he had some seriously good redeeming qualities. Like he was extremely bright, had a unique and enlightening perspective on life, really understood me, we had shared interests and activities, and he was interpersonally sensitive to my needs and emotionally stable. 

But otherwise, no.


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## CharmedOne (Jun 1, 2013)

I know the perfect woman for you. She is almost 32 and lives with her parents. She is the opposite of social and spends her time playing video games and sleeping. She will never meet your friends or parents, since she lacks social skills and friendliness. She is an introvert and lacks self esteem, due to her ugly face that has permanent acne scars that can't be cured. She doesn't play any instruments, has no talents, and is not funny.

On top of this, it's entirely possible, in your estimation, she's overweight.

If she flies across the country to meet you, and relocates to the East Coast, would you date a girl like this? Would you fall in love with her? Would you spend the rest of your life with her? Truthfully? If you say you would, I don't know you, so I can't question the veracity of your answer. But, if not, why not?

Although it may seem like it, I'm not trying to attack you personally or be sarcastic. I'm definitely not trying to hurt your feelings, pi$$ you off, or make you feel defensive. I've had no interactions with you. I don't know you at all. But you made this thread and posed this question to the women of SAS. So now, in all fairness, I'm posing these questions to you. And other men here.

I truly want to know if this description honestly appeals to you and to some of the other men of SAS. Men who seem to really believe that women are basically just shallow, picky, gold-digging, opportunistic, amoral, dishonest, cold hearted, game playing, worthless pieces of garbage.

So my questions are dead serious. Would you ask her out? Get genuinely involved in a romantic relationship with her? Envision spending the rest of your time on this earth with her, even if suddenly a "hot girl" and/or a "worthy girl" became interested in you?

Please, take a moment to do some real soul searching and ponder the reality of these questions. And if you would reject this woman I've described, even if she were willing to actually relocate just for you... why?

What about the rest of the males who post or lurk here, and feel negatively about females? I'm genuinely curious about your honest answers.

*tl;dr Read what you've said about yourself and contemplate if a woman with the same description would appeal to you. She might; I really have no idea if she would. But if not, why not? What is, or are, the deal breakers? Even though I said I'm curious, I don't need you to answer me if you don't want to. I just want you to face your description of yourself, be it accurate or distorted, and see if a woman with those qualities would be someone you'd desire.*


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## kageri (Oct 2, 2014)

I dated a guy like that except he turned 30 shortly after I met him and was probably even worse. Unfortunately I have to admit I was never planning anything serious with him. Especially when the whole thing about how he wants his mom to live with him the rest of his life came up. Maybe he was just after my house since he and his mom were living in a one room motel. They could have lived with his aunt but she was a hoarder and we ate christmas dinner with plastic silverware washed so many times it had stains along the seams. Supposedly she kept the plastic silverware so she can send it with people who needed meals. You know 12 packs of cheap metal spoons or forks are $1 right? By spring I was insistently telling him I didn't want him to come over to my house again.... for another 4 months before he went away.


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

lonerroom said:


> It sounds like you don't want to even try to help yourself in other ways, sure your social anxiety prevents you from going out and doing things, but you also don't want to try to use your mind for other things you can do in your own room, you could try to be creative, try to write, draw take a hobby that can have some purpose, make up short stories, at least you can try to come up with your own material. There is nothing wrong with a girl dating a 32-year-old who lives with his parents and has no job, but if you won't even try to have some creativity, not even a little bit, then you are hopeless. Just use your mind more, don't waste your brain.


the question was meant to be answered by females


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## quirkiful (Feb 27, 2016)

vsaxena said:


> *facepalm*
> 
> I humbly disagree with you, Quirki, but I like you too much to slam you into smithereens right now, ;-).
> 
> Instead I shall say this: GO DO YOUR HOMEWORK, YOUNG LADY, ;-).


Yay? And lol yes sir *salutes*


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## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

CharmedOne said:


> I know the perfect woman for you. She is almost 32 and lives with her parents. She is the opposite of social and spends her time playing video games and sleeping. She will never meet your friends or parents, since she lacks social skills and friendliness. She is an introvert and lacks self esteem, due to her ugly face that has permanent acne scars that can't be cured. She doesn't play any instruments, has no talents, and is not funny.
> 
> On top of this, it's entirely possible, in your estimation, she's overweight.
> 
> ...


I'd really like to see some answers to this...


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## Mr Fluff (Sep 16, 2014)

CharmedOne said:


> ....I know the perfect woman for you. She is almost 32 and lives with her parents. She is the opposite of social and spends her time playing video games and sleeping. She will never meet your friends or parents, since  she lacks social skills and friendliness. She is an introvert and lacks self esteem, due to her ugly face that has permanent acne scars that can't be cured. She doesn't play any instruments, has no talents, and is not funny.
> 
> On top of this, it's entirely possible, in your estimation, she's overweight.....
> 
> ...


*Your whole comment was fantastic! *(I quoted my favourite bits)

Hopefully the OP actually takes the time to ponder the questions you posed--with an open mind, it might help him grow. 
Actually, your comment is good for anyone who is in a similar situation as the OP.

Although, perhaps he's only looking for answers that reinforce his current thinking.


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## Zatch (Apr 28, 2013)

MobiusX said:


> who is almost 32 and live with his parents and is the opposite of social and spends his time playing video games and sleeping and will never meet your friends or parents since he is lacks social skills and friendliness and is an introvert and lacks self esteem due to his ugly face that has permanent acne scars that can't be cured


In a heartbeat most likely. Co-op vidya games, cuddling, relationship being off the radar, all sorts of ****. If he had the balls to ask me out despite all that I probably wouldn't mind.


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## lonerroom (May 16, 2015)

MobiusX said:


> No, he doesn't trust people since he was abused as a kid


why do you even want to date at all if you have this attitude?


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

lonerroom said:


> why do you even want to date at all if you have this attitude?


I never said I did


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## CharmedOne (Jun 1, 2013)

OP, Is that really you in your avatar? I don't see an unattractive guy in that picture. No acne scars are visible, but you see them and they're disheartening. People like Bill Murray, Evan Peters, and Cameron Diaz have acne scars, too. Bill Murray's are very obvious.

Do you see a therapist? Your comments show your self image has hit rock bottom. Describing yourself as ugly and focusing on acne scars seems like Body Dysmorphic Disorder, in which people have a negative, distorted image of themselves. It sounds like you're zoning in on your scars, while denying the existence of any positive aspects.

Have you ever looked in the mirror and told yourself that you have nice eyes, good hair, well proportioned features...? Found anything positive, rather than dwelling only on the negative and discounting any assets? A therapist can work with you on addressing that.

Escaping into video games day after day or lying in bed all day sounds like extreme depression. You're avoiding facing life. Have you seen a psychiatrist? You might need an antidepressant, in addition to therapy.

As lonerroom suggested, you can find enjoyable things to do in your room. That would not only give you a more constructive way to express your feelings, but you can find other people online who share your interests.

Try brainstorming. Sit down with a piece of paper and a pen. Write down any subjects or activities that interest you. Realistic or not. Because you're going to sift through them, and even the most unrealistic thing might spark a connection to something else that's totally doable.

You might like photography. Cooking. Building models of stuff. Growing a vegetable garden, even one of those window sill ones. You might want to take out anger through painting, express resentment or frustration writing poetry or song lyrics. If you don't play an instrument, would you be interested in trying to learn one? You can find used instruments online.

Almost anything imaginable seems to have a tutorial online. And clubs with other members into the same thing, ready to share tips on how to improve your skills.

Depression can stop a person from having the energy to try anything, but the reverse can also be true. Sometimes just getting up and finding something that's fun to do and makes you feel good about yourself, or trying something new that no one else has to see or criticize, can help get you out of the cycle of depression.

Lying in bed, feeling bad about yourself, bitter, resentful, or hopeless doesn't make those feelings go away. Avoiding facing them, with no outlet to release them, doesn't either.

Talking to someone who listens, understands, and advises can. Medications may. Finding something that interests you could, especially if you find others online that share that passion. But lonerroom is right. You have to try. Otherwise, nothing gets better.



lonerroom said:


> ...other things you can do in your own room, you could try to be creative, try to write, draw, take a hobby that can have some purpose, make up short stories, at least you can try to come up with your own material...Just use your mind more, don't waste your brain.


Those were helpful suggestions. But you replied:



MobiusX said:


> the question was meant to be answered by females


Can you see he was trying to motivate you? Then when he asked:



lonerroom said:


> why do you even want to date at all if you have this attitude?


You responded:



MobiusX said:


> I never said I did


Actually, you did. You created a thread and a poll asking females if they would date the described guy. Then, you revealed it wasn't a hypothetical male, it was you:



MobiusX said:


> I dont play any instruments and have no talents and I'm not funny


You obviously wanted something when you made this thread. Did you want any helpful advice? Or only to see some women respond positively, while disregarding any constructive criticism? Did you expect a woman to fall in love with a man who dislikes himself so much that this is all he can see about himself, blinded to everything else? Or did you just want confirmation that you'll be forever alone? Because it's within your power to give up and doom yourself to that.


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## CharmedOne (Jun 1, 2013)

TheInvisibleHand said:


> Probably not....unless she is fat.


This comment saddens me. It's not the first like this I've seen here. How would the SAS community and the mods respond if someone posted that a girl wouldn't date a guy with the above qualities "....unless she is black." "... unless she is 'mentally retarded'." "...unless she is Jewish."? I could go on, but you get the idea.

As someone who hasn't been "fat" since she was 9 years old, these comments horrify me. Seeing pics of myself from primary school, I wasn't even fat, just bullied into believing I was. That's how damaging these cruel remarks are to someone's self image. The meaning of them is clear; fat females are desperate. They have no worth and they're not attractive to anyone. They are useless to men, except as a hole.

Neither gender should be degraded like that. However, tv shows have helped build up fat guys to show them they can, and maybe deserve to, score the hottie wife. Examples of heavy husbands with gorgeous wives: King of Queens, Still Standing, That '70s Show (Donna's parents,) Family Guy, The George Lopez Show, According to Jim...

Courtney Thorne-Smith not only played the hot wife of overweight Jim Belushi, but on Two and a Half Men, she also was the hot fiancée of not particularly attractive Alan, who lives with (and off of) his brother, and has pretty much a crappy personality to boot.

On King of Queens, Doug is a heavy delivery guy who doesn't show any ambitions of advancing in his company. His smokin' wife Carrie, stays late at work and takes paralegal courses to get promotions at her job. I remember an episode that revolved around Doug telling Carrie he was not happy because it looked like she was putting on weight. He took a burger away from her and told her she needed to start eating salads. Then, he ate his burger, and hers.

On SAS, I've seen heavy women get called cows, pigs, grenades, etc... I don't believe I've heard anything equivalent about heavy men. I'm glad about the latter, but appalled about the former.

It's tragic that on a forum for people who can't help they're socially anxious, some members refer to someone fat, (who possibly turns to food for a stress relieving dopamine rush, much as some others turn to alcohol, nail biting, or avoidance...) as something less than human.

I wish there were a way I could block my seeing some of these threads pop up on the side bar or recent posts page. But even that wouldn't help. Comments like these hijack and derail other threads, too. They seem to be unavoidable.


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## lonerroom (May 16, 2015)

CharmedOne said:


> OP, Is that really you in your avatar? I don't see an unattractive guy in that picture. No acne scars are visible, but you see them and they're disheartening. People like Bill Murray, Evan Peters, and Cameron Diaz have acne scars, too. Bill Murray's are very obvious.
> 
> Do you see a therapist? Your comments show your self image has hit rock bottom. Describing yourself as ugly and focusing on acne scars seems like Body Dysmorphic Disorder, in which people have a negative, distorted image of themselves. It sounds like you're zoning in on your scars, while denying the existence of any positive aspects.
> 
> ...


Thank you, at least you aknowledged my advice, which it is something I hardly ever do, but it bothers me to see people waste away in misery when they don't have to at all. I would go mad if I didn't have creativity so I try to encourage others to use their minds so they at least don't waste away in misery totally mindless. Obviously the OP could care less about what I have to say, and I don't care about that. But anyone who saw a post like this who would care, I hope my attempt at advice would help someone who did care to think about it.


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## Batcat (Nov 19, 2014)

Alright, who are the 4 guys that voted yes? Name yourselves.


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## TheInvisibleHand (Sep 5, 2015)

CharmedOne said:


> This comment saddens me. It's not the first like this I've seen here. How would the SAS community and the mods respond if someone posted that a girl wouldn't date a guy with the above qualities ".*...unless she is black." "... unless she is 'mentally retarded'." "...unless she is Jewish."?* I could go on, but you get the idea.


Yeah i stopped reading after that . Please seek professional help . I will not entertain your irrational thinking .


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

CharmedOne said:


> OP, Is that really you in your avatar? I don't see an unattractive guy in that picture. No acne scars are visible, but you see them and they're disheartening. People like Bill Murray, Evan Peters, and Cameron Diaz have acne scars, too. Bill Murray's are very obvious.
> 
> Do you see a therapist? Your comments show your self image has hit rock bottom. Describing yourself as ugly and focusing on acne scars seems like Body Dysmorphic Disorder, in which people have a negative, distorted image of themselves. It sounds like you're zoning in on your scars, while denying the existence of any positive aspects.
> 
> ...


I am ugly and I will die ugly and the reason why the acne scars are not visible on the freaking avatar is cause it's too small to notice, there is no body dysmorphia going on here, it's facts, it's real, even the therapist told me a long time ago she could see my scars


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

MobiusX said:


> who is almost 32 and live with his parents and is the opposite of social and spends his time playing video games and sleeping and will never meet your friends or parents since he is lacks social skills and friendliness and is an introvert and lacks self esteem due to his ugly face that has permanent acne scars that can't be cured


How much money does he have?


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