# Making friends in mid 20s



## Jonb2693 (Sep 16, 2019)

I'm looking for advice on how to make friends in mid 20s.

My entire childhood to high school life, I was super shy and awkward with no friends. In college, I made some friends and became better socially, however, I started to learn that I like being by myself.

Now out of college, I've grown away from my previous friends, due to not really being the same type of people as me. All I do now is work and go home. Sometimes I'm happy with this lifestyle, other days I'm bored and wish my life had more purpose. However, I have no idea how to make friends, and I do not want to make friends from work, since I really want to stop thinking about work (I have a salary job that is actually pretty stressful and requires a lot of social contact.)

If anyone has a similar experience, can they please advise me on how to get out of this boring situation?


----------



## shyguy07 (Mar 22, 2015)

That describes me pretty well. I'm a few years older than you but I had the same thing after I graduated. It's harder then because you don't meet new people your age as much anymore. I'd suggest possibly joining a group in your area or city that you might have an interest in. Maybe a team of guys that plays sports, or a gaming group? Churches can also be good places to meet people.

It is harder when you just go to work everyday and not much else. That's kinda where I've been for the last several years. I don't really want to make friends from worth either because I prefer not to talk about it much in my free time. Not necessarily because I don't like people there or think they're bad, I'd just rather leave work stuff at work.


----------



## AllGlad (Feb 16, 2018)

Im not sure how to make friends either. But I think the one way to at least start the process, is to just go out and meet people.
Meetup groups are a good way. But of course each group is hit or miss, nor is it a guarantee that you will find someone. But I feel generally people are more open to being friends in meetup groups because I think it's kinda what meetups are about.



I think it's like a numbers game, just keep meeting more and more people, eventually you will click with someone.


----------



## Darvyn (Sep 17, 2013)

I've been lucky enough to have co-workers that are rather pleasant, but I understand that your situation is different.

Much like the others in this thread, I think you should start with going to events that have to do with things you're interested in. That way you can find folks with mutual interests hopefully develop some sort of acquaintanceship.

You could also try to find an online community? I know it's not ideal, but who knows.

Honestly I'd be willing to hear some advice as well!


----------



## GeorgeMilton (Oct 15, 2019)

Jonb2693 said:


> I'm looking for advice on how to make friends in mid 20s.
> 
> My entire childhood to high school life, I was super shy and awkward with no friends. In college, I made some friends and became better socially, however, I started to learn that I like being by myself.
> 
> ...


 Well, I would like to meet you maybe, lol.

I find it hard myself, but I think it's easier to make friends in an easy environment- that is, in a place where people are not high stress or just trying to get things done. Where that would be is tricky, but I think tourist type areas are one place. Having something to talk about can be tricky with people. If people are together for a purpose (lets say a convention or rally, etc), then it's only natural to go over and say "What's this about?" Church groups can be good.

Kinda advice for myself, lol. I know when I was working that I was both anxious and unable to connect with people, and my attempts at socializing flopped most of the time. I spent a lot of time thinking about jumping into traffic or feeling life was useless. When I was a homeless traveler I was better, partly because I needed charm to survive, but also I met more people I could really connect with- though it was few and far between.
I connected with very lively christian people in one place, and the acceptance and purpose they had was infectious. Sadly, I've turned into a misanthrope of late.

I guess I can summarize it this way- either meet people having fun or people together for a cause. People like that are more open.


----------



## FloridaGuy48 (Jun 30, 2014)

Well it doesn't get easier when your older. Im 42. Meetup groups are a great source for me personally


----------



## Ben7731 (Jan 31, 2018)

Church and maybe the gym, im weird , i can do physical stuff in front of people, but dont ask me to talk, my mind shuts down completly, but its good exposure therapy, and definitely a good Church, i find i had to tell people the truth about my social anxiety rather than try to cover it,or make conversation when i cant, it went from people thinking i was stuck up/ to befriending me and trying to help, and i was alot more relaxed, because normally my anxiety gets worse, because of how bad my anxiety is, but they understood and i didnt get asked to do things i couldnt


----------



## RedHouse (Jul 13, 2019)

3188bh said:


> Church and maybe the gym, im weird , i can do physical stuff in front of people, but dont ask me to talk, my mind shuts down completly, but its good exposure therapy, and definitely a good Church, i find i had to tell people the truth about my social anxiety rather than try to cover it,or make conversation when i cant, it went from people thinking i was stuck up/ to befriending me and trying to help, and i was alot more relaxed, because normally my anxiety gets worse, because of how bad my anxiety is, but they understood and i didnt get asked to do things i couldnt


I totally agree about being upfront with your SA bro, its genius.


----------

