# Can a guy be too ugly to ever find love?



## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

Take me for exemple: i am short, skinny, strange hair, very red lips, small head, walks strange, small p*e*is, no social skills, bad posture, ugly face etc. I am just a very ugly guy.

how can any women like me when i have so many flaws? all other guys are better than me and the girls know it.


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## TheInvisibleHand (Sep 5, 2015)

If you are rich or you get a good paying job everything is possible no matter how ugly you are .


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## mastercowboy (Sep 11, 2012)

Rent a luxury car and it's done


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## M0rbid (Jan 11, 2011)

wallet


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## David777 (Feb 6, 2011)

Don't feel bad bro. I honestly believe that anyone can improve their appearance. Learn to dress better, learn to walk better, the right hair cut can turn into a 4 to 7. 

You may never reach the top of the mountain, but you'll have a much better few of the top, than you would looking at it from the very bottom.


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## lizzy19 (Jun 16, 2012)

No, I've seen ugly men with gf's not saying you are ugly.


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## andretti (Jan 2, 2016)

TheInvisibleHand said:


> If you are rich or you get a good paying job everything is possible no matter how ugly you are .


messed up. if girls only wanted me cause i had money, that would f with me so much. i couldnt have a girl like that.

you looking at it the wrong way. being ugly builds characters 
Plus when you are ugly you know people like you for you , not just cause they want something from you.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

No. There's always hope.


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## xxDark Horse (May 13, 2015)

If a girl only wants to date you because you have lots of money, then throw her asss out. All you need to worry about is holding down a steady job. Compatibility is far more important then making poop loads of money. 

I wouldn't date a girl who's hot but has no personality. I want someone who's compatible and I get along with. Not just a lover but also a friend. You know what i'm saying? 


Money attracts the hoes and gold diggers.


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## Nathan18 (Sep 15, 2009)

No. There are very ugly people that have found love. Not to say it is easy, because it is obviously harder if you're unattractive. It's just not an impossible task.


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## audikosti (Jan 7, 2016)

Most people think its about looks... i would say 40-50% of the time maybe.. but its more about confidence i believe!


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## truant (Jul 4, 2014)

It mostly depends on how hard you want to work. The less attractive you are, the harder you have to work. Them's the rules.

You already know what will happen if you don't change: exactly what's happening right now. I think the worst thing a person can do, and the easiest way to end up alone, is to wait for someone to love you just the way you are.

People don't fall madly in love with average people. They fall madly in love with awesome people. And people don't start out awesome; they make themselves awesome by being more and more awesome every day. Even if you never find someone, it's still better to live an awesome life than an average one.


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## DistraughtOwl (Mar 1, 2014)

Well we aren't ugly or beautiful to everyone. I do think that people can be too ugly sometimes... Like deformed people.


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## HannahG (Aug 31, 2010)

I know someone who is far from appealing physically. Long scar across his face, lazy eye, oversized jaw (about 3 times bigger than normal due to medical issue) & he's overweight and has bad hair, dresses badly. He's one of the nicest guys you'll ever meet though. He has a girlfriend.

But there are some people I know (myself included) who just can't find boyfriends/girlfriends. It baffles me. I don't understand why some people are so challenged in the subject and others aren't. I mean, I know for me it's mostly SA related issues but it still baffles me.


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## mjkittredge (Sep 8, 2012)

As badly off as you may be (and we tend to judge our own flaws more harshly than others do) there are women just as bad or worse off. They're in one of two groups - they've either never dated due to fear and self doubt, or they did date and were treated horribly. So if you can show them you are a decent human being you can get a chance with them.


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## Srylance (Apr 20, 2014)

mastercowboy said:


> Rent a luxury car and it's done


I wouldn't call this true, i have a pretty nice car for my age. And it has no effect whatsoever. Most girls don't care about cars, and can't tell a quality car from a cheap one. i'm sure once they get older they will, but young girls, some hardly know brand names.


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## Junny (Dec 7, 2015)

Learn ways to improve yourself, where there are problems there are also solutions, you're never going to be perfect and truth be told you probably won't ever be happy with yourself, learn to tolerate yourself, appreciate yourself and most importantly understand yourself.


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## annabellah (Jan 6, 2016)

confidence is sooo attractive to people, I've learned to fake it. I've been called pretty, stunning, gorgeous, average, plain and ugly by different people, its all individual, one mans meat is another mans poison.. Enjoy ur life as much as poss, and people will want to join u for the ride.


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## SaladDays (Nov 26, 2013)

how rich are you? you can probably afford gf in a poor country if you have a well paying job she won't care about how you look and you can be happy together


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

I've seen ugly guys with girlfriends and vice-versa. But my guess is, they are a small percentage of the lonely ugly men out there. These days everyone is more picky about who they want to be with. More to choose from and easier to discard the unwanted.

But it doesn't mean you should stop trying because then it's obvious you won't find anyone.


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## loneranger (Dec 29, 2012)

Interesting thread.


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## mastercowboy (Sep 11, 2012)

Srylance said:


> I wouldn't call this true, i have a pretty nice car for my age. And it has no effect whatsoever. Most girls don't care about cars, and can't tell a quality car from a cheap one. i'm sure once they get older they will, but young girls, some hardly know brand names.


They can tell a Ferrari trust me.


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## SD92 (Nov 9, 2013)

If you've got SA as well as those things, you'll find it extremly difficult. No SA and it probably wouldn't be all that hard. It's about the Social Anxiety and level of it.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

Salman Rushdie










Despite what he looks like, he had relationships with some gorgeous women. Of course, it helps that he's a famous author but he's also known to be a smooth talker.

I guess if you're successful and charming that can overcome your lack of good looks.

Think about it, no nobody really chooses a mate based on a single criteria. It's a combination of things. If a girl is really hot you might ignore the fact that she's really dumb. Or if a girl loves playing video games that might make the girl more attractive.

There are many qualities that make you attractive so you have to boost your strengths and minimize your weaknesses.


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## ScorchedEarth (Jul 12, 2014)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grady_Stiles


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

TheInvisibleHand said:


> If you are rich or you get a good paying job everything is possible no matter how ugly you are .


If you are one of the most ugly guys on earth like i am, no money can help.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

lizzy19 said:


> No, I've seen ugly men with gf's


Me too. But its very rare. Probaly only 1 of 100 ugly guys ever have a relationship.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

visualkeirockstar said:


> No. There's always hope.


Not for me. Even on Reddit people tell me that i am ugly.

I have so many flaws its just silly. And i cant fix them, i have tried.



LichtLune said:


> Well we aren't ugly or beautiful to everyone. I do think that people can be too ugly sometimes... Like deformed people.


Nobody has ever told me that i am decent looking. No women has ever talked to me in that way. Some people are ugly to everyone.


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## Furiosa (Jun 2, 2015)

Have you done anything to improve your appearance at all? Even if someone isnt that good looking, there is a whole load of stuff you can do to make yourself look a bit better. Go to a decent salon for a new haircut and colour. Whiten your teeth using whitening strips. Use a sunbed (or fake tan) to give yourself a nice glow. Go to a decent clothing store and use the personal shopper service to advise you on what current clothes trends are in. Start adopting a skin care regime; cleanse, tone, exfoliate, moisturise. You can even get male make up these days. Body wise, just start exercising, do a mix of cardio, weights and flexibility training. 

If you have the money, there is always the cosmetic treatment route? It doesnt necessarily have to be full invasive surgery, there are lots of options such as microdermabrasion, facial peels, lip plumpers, wrinkle fillers, etc which can all improve your looks.


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## halfly (Sep 18, 2012)

as long as they are ok with someone who may also be unattractive, i can't imagine it's impossible.

not to say that a more unattractive person can't wind up with a very attractive one. that's just more unlikely is all and really lowers chances.


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## Maverick34 (Feb 18, 2013)

No. There's someone for everyone. We've all got to search for it & work for it. Nothing worthy ever comes easy


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## ethericbody (Feb 22, 2016)

There's someone for everyone.


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## Swanhild (Nov 26, 2012)

^This saying needs to die, it's simply not true. I know for a fact there is no one for me for example.


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## xxDark Horse (May 13, 2015)

First off you have to ask yourself, do you really want a girlfriend? You're 24 years old, you're not getting any younger you know. I'm going to assume you have said yes. If you really want a girlfriend, then you have to be committed to working and improving on yourself and with ladies. The question is how hard do you want to work? Work hard, if you fail then get up and try again. 

Appearance-wise, there's some things you can change and others you can't. 


You can't change your height, race, dick size, etc... 


But you can change your clothes selection, body type (to a certain extent) hair, hygeine, and overall friendliness. Start working out, eating healthier, wearing better clothes, trying out a different hairstyle. There's so many ways you can make yourself better looking. You can also make yourself more attractive by simply being friendly. 



The first step to getting a girlfriend is learning how to be comfortable around women and make small talk. All you have to do is ask question about themselves. Because if you never attempt to talk to women, then they will never get to know you and if a girl ever does show interest in you, you have to be ready. Also you have to learn to take initiative and eventually ask for her number, out on a date etc... 


If you are anything like me and you avoid talking to women at all costs because you're scared, then you're going to end up alone for a long time. 

You gotta work hard and be ready for some failure but once you do get a gf and you can make love to, it will be all worth it in the end.



And no you don't have to be rich to get a girlfriend. If a girl only dates you for your money, then throw her asss out.


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## M0rbid (Jan 11, 2011)

^ you can change your wallet size


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## ethericbody (Feb 22, 2016)

Swanhild said:


> ^This saying needs to die, it's simply not true. I know for a fact there is no one for me for example.


You don't know that "for a fact." Pessimism is usually not good at discerning facts from fiction.


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## Swanhild (Nov 26, 2012)

ethericbody said:


> You don't know that "for a fact." Pessimism is usually not good at discerning facts from fiction.


Yes I do. And it's not pessimism, just realism.

People like me are extremely rare sure, but there's still enough of us to prove that saying wrong.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

It's hard to be less attractive than Woody Allen. He's had his fair share of attractive women.










Then you have the legendary Salman Rushdie










Of course the key is they make up for their lack of aesthetic appeal with personality and success. So, if you're an unattractive guy you have to work on other areas.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

Swanhild said:


> ^This saying needs to die, it's simply not true. I know for a fact there is no one for me for example.


It's impossible for you to know this for a fact. You're just guessing or assuming.

There are plenty of people who like ugly clothes and terrible music. There is no accounting for taste. You may not like the way you look but there could be someone out there who likes your looks.

Why do you feel a need to predict what others will think of feel? Why not go out and find out and accept the answers you get?


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## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

In the words of Ira Gershwin: 
"Somewhere theres a someone 
who's a someone for me
someday there will come one 
and my lover she will be" 

I honestly think ANYONE doesn't matter what you look like or what insecurities you have, anyone can and will find love. They just have to be patient not with when the other person will show up but with themselves. Look within yourself and find stuff that you like about yourself because I'm pretty sure you're a very cool dude. Do not look for validation from others, its nice to be accepted but its better to be comfortable in your own skin first. I'm pretty sure people who told you you're unattractive are probably either lying to you or telling you just because they are projecting their own insecurities on you. Hang in there. I probably sound corny but it gets better.


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## vsaxena (Apr 17, 2015)

Yes @ OP's question. And money has nothing to do with it. We're talking about genuine love, people ...


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## M0rbid (Jan 11, 2011)

vsaxena said:


> Yes @ OP's question. And money has nothing to do with it. We're talking about *genuine love*, people ...


dats rare tho....


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## Swanhild (Nov 26, 2012)

AngelClare said:


> It's impossible for you to know this for a fact. You're just guessing or assuming.
> 
> There are plenty of people who like ugly clothes and terrible music. There is no accounting for taste. You may not like the way you look but there could be someone out there who likes your looks.
> 
> Why do you feel a need to predict what others will think of feel? Why not go out and find out and accept the answers you get?


I think I've lived long enough to be able to say with confidence that that I'm guaranteed to die alone at this point. There is _no one_ out there who could like my looks or accept flaws like mine, and I don't even have a good personality or charisma to possibly make up for them.

I know it's hard for you normal people to understand that there are absolute bottom of the barrel individuals who are completely undesirable to everyone though, so let's just leave it at that.


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## sosassy (Oct 29, 2014)

no


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Given the couples I see around here at times, I highly doubt anyone here is ugly enough to find love if their standards match their appearance. It's when you aim far above your weight you find little success, but you can't help who you find attractive.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

Swanhild said:


> I know it's hard for you normal people to understand that there are absolute bottom of the barrel individuals who are completely undesirable to everyone though, so let's just leave it at that.


The idea that there are people undesirable to EVERYONE is demonstrably false. It's just not factually true. Nothing is true of everyone.



> Russian Sideshow Performers Adrian Jeftichew and his son Fedor (1868-1904; later better known as Jo-Jo the Dog-Faced Boy). During the 1870s they toured and performed in French Circuses (later in 1884 Fedor Jeftichew was brought to the USA by P.T. Barnum). ca. 1875 More


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

> Percilla Lauther Bejano was born in 1911 in Puerto Rico, the only one of five children to be born with excessive hair. Her mother consulted with doctors, but could find no treatment for her. Percilla was adopted by exhibitor Karl L. Lauther after her own father was killed and she toured with the Johnny J. Jones Exposition. She was educated and articulate, and sang and danced in her exhibit. Percilla fell in love with another sideshow exhibit named Emmitt Bejano, who suffered from ichthyosis and was billed as the Alligator-Skinned Man. *The two married in 1938 and remained madly in love until Emmitt's death in 1995. They were billed as "The World's Strangest Married Couple"* when they toured with Ringling Brothers. Percilla and Emmitt appeared in the 1980 film Carny. Percilla was introduced to a new generation of admirers when she appeared clean shaven on The Jerry Springer Show in 1997. Percilla passed away in 2001 at age 89.


http://mentalfloss.com/article/22243/8-very-hairy-people


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## NewHabits (Oct 26, 2015)

AngelClare said:


> Then you have the legendary Salman Rushdie


That woman isn't attractive either :serious:


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

NewHabits said:


> That woman isn't attractive either :serious:


I guess you have high standards


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## Cil (Jan 13, 2016)

Everything in life is a chance. Risk it or you will live to regret choosing to not have lived at all. Be rejected, get hurt and grow from the pain. You will find the right one eventually. I find it hard to believe if someone lives life happily and is always just being true to who they are that they won't find someone. So many things you can do to help change who you are for the better if you just want it bad enough.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

You can be hot and still have no chance.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

sosassy said:


> no


Then how do you explain my life?

Nobody has ever telling me that i am attractive and many females laugh and say mean things towards me.

It seems that every female dislike me. viewing me as a ugly loser.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

Swanhild said:


> I think I've lived long enough to be able to say with confidence that that I'm guaranteed to die alone at this point. There is _no one_ out there who could like my looks or accept flaws like mine, and I don't even have a good personality or charisma to possibly make up for them.
> 
> I know it's hard for you normal people to understand that there are absolute bottom of the barrel individuals who are completely undesirable to everyone though, so let's just leave it at that.


I am 100 % sure you are not right about yourself!

Try to meet a shrink it will help you.

But for me, there is no hope. I cant even go out, there is always some female saying mean things towards me or laughing at me. So tired of it. I just want to be a normal person.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

ethericbody said:


> You don't know that "for a fact." Pessimism is usually not good at discerning facts from fiction.


for me its not fiction. even my sister bullies me.

cant even talk on internet, have no friends and no females want to talk to me, not even on this site. would help if any from the oppsite gender would like to talk to me, but i guess not, i am such a loser....who wants to talk to a loser guy like me 

i feel terrible right now.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

halfly said:


> as long as they are ok with someone who may also be unattractive, i can't imagine it's impossible.
> 
> not to say that a more unattractive person can't wind up with a very attractive one. that's just more unlikely is all and really lowers chances.


I am okay but nobody likes me.....i have no demands. seems like everyone thinks that i am ugly. i could date all women that has ever lived and not a single one of them would want me.

I just lack everyting. I have nothing of value and cant fix it becuse i am such a hopeless person without any future.


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## Svarog11 (Jul 15, 2016)

Honestly OP I think you're ****ed. Figuratively that is. I sincerely hope you can be content with video games and other loner hobbies


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

Svarog11 said:


> Honestly OP I think you're ****ed. Figuratively that is. I sincerely hope you can be content with video games and other loner hobbies


I have know about this since i was 13.

Its really depressing to know that you are gonna live your whole life alone and never get love.

I have a lot of hobbies, and i take meds and meets several shrinks, but nothing helps becuse its part of human nature do want social life.

Its like im stuck in a room and there is no door or window do get out and everyhing is dark, no lamp to turn on light.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

yes.


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## Svarog11 (Jul 15, 2016)

ljubo said:


> I have know about this since i was 13.
> 
> Its really depressing to know that you are gonna live your whole life alone and never get love.
> 
> ...


You can enjoy a social life like anyone else, friends won't care about your appearance and you can use it as a means to find a girl you like even if your chances aren't the best


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## Miach (Mar 29, 2016)

ljubo said:


> Take me for exemple: i am short, skinny, strange hair, very red lips, small head, walks strange, small p*e*is, no social skills, bad posture, ugly face etc. I am just a very ugly guy.
> 
> how can any women like me when i have so many flaws? all other guys are better than me and the girls know it.


About half of your list you can change to more how you like:

Skinny. You can work out and put on weight. Maybe it is hard for you to put on weight but there are ways, and you should naturally put on weight as you get older anyway.

Strange hair. I don't know what is strange about it but I'm sure you can make it look less strange if that is what you want. Have it styled in the best way to suit you.

Very red lips. I've seen a guy who has said this before ("very very red lips"), and his lips were absolutely fine. I don't think there's anything wrong with very red lips anyway.

Walks strange. You can change the way you walk by using a big mirror or reflection of some sort. Try to walk in a way that you like, and keep using that same technique until you become used to it.

Social skills. They can be increased by working on them. Learn what to do, and practice.

Bad posture. This can be improved unless you have some kind of problem or deformity. Once again learn how to have a good posture then practice it so it becomes more natural. This should also make you look a little taller as well, thus helping your "short" issue.

Ugly face. Make yourself look as good as possible. Find a look that suits you best, with your hair, facial hair, grooming etc.

Small penis. That doesn't matter if you find someone who is worth your time. And I hear there are ways of making it bigger, but I don't know about that. There are also other ways to pleasure women of course.

Small head. That doesn't matter either. Some people have a small head, some have a big head some have a medium head. It isn't something you can change and isn't important.

This is pretty much all assuming you don't have BDD. I have seen many people who have claimed themselves and convinced themselves to be terribly ugly, but have been good looking, not even average IMO.

There are other things you can do as well, like make yourself smell very nice, dress nicely, and don't be too negative about yourself. I've also seen lovely women with guys who some might call ugly, but they had personality and believed that they were good looking. And maybe were to others.

You can change yourself if you're willing to put the work in


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## warhaiku (Apr 12, 2016)

Definitely. My dad was a landlord and rented rooms to people who were definitely alone for their entire lives and probably died this way due to being extremely undesirable.


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## Evo1114 (Dec 9, 2012)

I think it is more the thoughts about being ugly that doom people more than their actual physical appearance. Somebody who always tells their self how ugly they are are far less likely to put forth any effort. People who are ugly but don't see their self as being so probably have much more success.


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## HD905 (Jul 25, 2016)

Personality plays a huge role in how women view men. A guy can be very attractive, but if he has an awful personality, he is usually not considered boyfriend material. I don't think a guy can ever be too ugly to love. Women aren't always as shallow as people think we are. Men are more likely to go after women based off of looks. Women are willing to give most guys a chance as long as they are kind, caring, funny, and/or charming.


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## ThinkAboutApples (Jun 25, 2016)

well you'll have to build confidence somehow it's literaly the only way. I'm fat and (i think that) not very good looking, but there were times I tried looking more "badass" in front of girls and I guess and somehow they took the bait. So it's not just looks, it's literaly more the way you talk and move. If you show confidence it should be ok (allthough it's hard. I still can't do it  ) You know... just, be yourself ?


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

Svarog11 said:


> You can enjoy a social life like anyone else, friends won't care about your appearance and you can use it as a means to find a girl you like even if your chances aren't the best


I could have a social life on my own, going out alone and doing stuff but i am to ashamed over myself, people always stare at me and laugh so i rather hide myself.

Friends does care about appearence if you look like i do. I look like bigfoot but with less hair. And to get friends you also have to have some sort of social status and decent personality, i have neither and will never get.

Finding a women is like winning 5 millions on lottery....will never happen.


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## 658298 (Jun 26, 2015)

Even with makeup, I feel too ugly for any guy.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

warhaiku said:


> Definitely. My dad was a landlord and rented rooms to people who were definitely alone for their entire lives and probably died this way due to being extremely undesirable.


:crying:



HD905 said:


> Personality plays a huge role in how women view men. A guy can be very attractive, but if he has an awful personality, he is usually not considered boyfriend material. I don't think a guy can ever be too ugly to love. Women aren't always as shallow as people think we are. Men are more likely to go after women based off of looks. Women are willing to give most guys a chance as long as they are kind, caring, funny, and/or charming.


I am too ugly, if you ever saw me you would agree.

Indeed, women (and guys too) are not always shallow, but most people have demands. Some people are just extremely undesirable that nobody wants them.


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## sad1231234 (Jul 10, 2016)

There are people who will love you for who you are


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

ThinkAboutApples said:


> well you'll have to build confidence somehow it's literaly the only way. I'm fat and (i think that) not very good looking, but there were times I tried looking more "badass" in front of girls and I guess and somehow they took the bait. So it's not just looks, it's literaly more the way you talk and move. If you show confidence it should be ok (allthough it's hard. I still can't do it  ) You know... just, be yourself ?


Many gangsters and mafia is fat. Its not a problem to be fat if you are cool.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

sad1231234 said:


> There are people who will love you for who you are


Who? Where? Nobody has ever loved me. Ok, my family. But outside of my family, not a single soul. When my family dies, i will have nobody.



Emmm said:


> Even with makeup, I feel too ugly for any guy.


Many females feels like this. Its todays society and media telling every women that they have too look like a barbie-doll. You are fine as you are.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

Evo1114 said:


> I think it is more the thoughts about being ugly that doom people more than their actual physical appearance. Somebody who always tells their self how ugly they are are far less likely to put forth any effort. People who are ugly but don't see their self as being so probably have much more success.


Not for me, i am actually ugly.

Other people tell me that i am ugly.

I have put effort, much effort, i get no positive result out of it.


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## warhaiku (Apr 12, 2016)

I don't think ugly precludes you from finding love, but it just adds another layer of extra effort you need to put in. You're ugly and socially anxious so now you need to put all this effort into finding love by overcoming those obstacles and it's very tough and I think a lot of people just can't do it.


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## Svarog11 (Jul 15, 2016)

ljubo said:


> I could have a social life on my own, going out alone and doing stuff but i am to ashamed over myself, people always stare at me and laugh so i rather hide myself.
> 
> Friends does care about appearence if you look like i do. I look like bigfoot but with less hair. And to get friends you also have to have some sort of social status and decent personality, i have neither and will never get.
> 
> Finding a women is like winning 5 millions on lottery....will never happen.


you're right about the social status and personality, also money - when you have friends you're expected to go places and that costs money, I can't tell you how big a deterrent it is to be broke af, literally not have a cent --- you just can't have friends if there is nothing you can do with them.

But regarding the looks, well yes, I get that sometimes people are extremely ugly and I believe you when you say you are, but there are steps you can take to make yourself look at least somewhat presentable, depending on how much time and money you can put into it you can still have a decent haircut, skin, body and clean, well fitting *brand* clothing, which would help.


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## In The Shade (Jun 26, 2016)

Anyone can be too ugly to find love

Humans are biologically wired to like certain characteristics in a partner. Women favour men who are strong mentally and physically, its just how it is.


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## Mlt18 (Jun 29, 2016)

I guess so.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

Svarog11 said:


> but there are steps you can take to make yourself look at least somewhat presentable, depending on how much time and money you can put into it you can still have a decent haircut, skin, body and clean, well fitting *brand* clothing, which would help.


No, no, no.

For me its not possible, my looks is that bad.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

Miach said:


> About half of your list you can change to more how you like:
> 
> Skinny. You can work out and put on weight. Maybe it is hard for you to put on weight but there are ways, and you should naturally put on weight as you get older anyway.
> 
> ...


I have already tried to fix myself in best possible way, and tried diffrent paths, but it only helps 0,1 % so its not worth it.

I could date all the women in the world and not a single one of them would want me.


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## siegen (Jul 26, 2016)

Definitely can. An ugly man can work on improving his personality, his virtue, his achievements, and his physique. This alleviates the situation sometimes, but at other times it's not enough. Some men are just too ugly. These men just have to look into a mirror and admit to themselves that they can't expect a woman to love them. They should accept that they were simply not meant to be loved, and should focus on finding other means of fulfillment in life. Ditto goes for ugly women.


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## xxDark Horse (May 13, 2015)

If the fattest man in the world can get married, i'm sure my short scrawny self can at least get a date.


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## Miach (Mar 29, 2016)

ljubo said:


> I have already tried to fix myself in best possible way, and tried diffrent paths, but it only helps 0,1 % so its not worth it.


I doubt you yet know what the best possible ways are, you are still young and have much to learn. Don't give up on yourself!



ljubo said:


> I could date all the women in the world and not a single one of them would want me.


That is just speculation, you don't know that.


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## RobinTurnaround (May 11, 2016)

ljubo said:


> Take me for exemple: i am short, skinny, strange hair, very red lips, small head, walks strange, small p*e*is, no social skills, bad posture, ugly face etc. I am just a very ugly guy.
> 
> how can any women like me when i have so many flaws? all other guys are better than me and the girls know it.


Ugly has a different meaning for anyone. Skinny, strange hair, very red lips and walks strange would be things that I find ATTRACTIVE for example.


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## IAMJEFF (Jul 28, 2016)

To people saying money ... I do pretty well (better than avg income), drive a nice car, dress pretty well, yet .... I can't get a gf, and I've been trying both paid and free dating sites for quite some time now. I've had a few dates here and there, but those went nowhere.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

RobinTurnaround said:


> Ugly has a different meaning for anyone. Skinny, strange hair, very red lips and walks strange would be things that I find ATTRACTIVE for example.


some people are ugly for everyone, i am that ugly.

and no, you dont find that attractive, nobody does.


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## RobinTurnaround (May 11, 2016)

ljubo said:


> some people are ugly for everyone, i am that ugly.
> 
> and no, you dont find that attractive, nobody does.


O sure, YOU know what I find attractive and what not. :mum
I think I can decide that for myself. And if you just don't want to except that beauty is different to everyone and see this as a chance then don't start such a thread. What do you want people to write under here if not that there is a chance?! Do you want us to simply pity you? Well, without me. May you drown in your "ugliness"


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## SA go0n (Mar 5, 2014)

Yes, I'm living proof of that. Feel free to call me a liar though.


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## chefdave (Dec 16, 2013)

In my experience if you're an unattractive guy its quite easy to go through life with very little interest from the opposite sex. Going without love becomes the default option which is a painful concept to come to terms with initially but it gets easier over time.

Its not impossible I suppose but it is more of an uphill struggle.


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## acidicwithpanic (May 14, 2014)

Lol just look at Steve Buscemi.


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## xxDark Horse (May 13, 2015)

My roommate who's overweight, looks like he needs a good shower, doesn't drive, has high-functioning autism and language problems, and could pass for a legitimate neckbeard went on a date off of Zoosk and they're still dating as of 1 month and they seem happy together. I'm happy and proud of him, now it's my turn. 


So if my fat hairy socially awkward roommate can have some sort of success with women, then almost anybody can. Stop beating yourself up and think positive. Put yourself out there and get ready to face rejection but think about it this way; you're just one rejection away from a girl who will finally accept you. 


Also, if the fattest man in the world can get married, then i'm sure you can AT LEAST get a date if you really put in the effort to get better with women. 


Shadow Prophet out.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)




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## Darktower776 (Aug 16, 2013)

I don't think so. However if the guy is too insecure, low self-esteem, too bitter, etc. then yes that can stop them from finding love.


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## Kovu (Jun 18, 2013)

Yes. I'm 100% sure Elephant man and Michael Jackson after the surgerys could not have gotten a partner.


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## Zatch (Apr 28, 2013)

I don't think so.


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## xxDark Horse (May 13, 2015)

I think what can stop you from finding love is self-sabotaging thoughts about yourself and about the opposite sex. 

For instance, making the assumption that every single pretty girl is out riding the cock carousel of guys who are way bigger, taller and more handsome than you and believing you could never stand a chance. Or developing a bitter attitude towards woman because of your perception of how easy they have it attracting men while you struggle to even get a date. Or getting to the point where you can't even take a single rejection. 

You're basically sabotaging yourself and letting negativity and self-assumption about women cause you to not even try and that's a hard cycle to break out of. It's EXTREMELY easy to get into a habit of complaining about the rigged system of how women have it easier in the dating game.


Yeah you're right, women generally speaking whom are in their early 20s do have it easier attracting men and how do I know that? Because I was a victim of the system, you are much more likely to be aware of a system if it affects you unfairly. 

But you shoudn't be bitter towards woman because of this. They cant help that they were born attractive and men just happen to admire beauty. They're lonely and probably horny just like you so of course they're going to be receptive to attractive guys who give them attention, you would be the same way if you were born a female. 

Dating is a numbers game as a man. You have to learn to sink or the swim in the world of dating. If you sit and complain on forums about how no girl likes you and wish that girls would give you a chance, it's not going to make a girl give you a chance, in fact it will probably produce the opposite effect, she's going to think you are a loser and women are attracted to men who appear higher in the social hierarchy much like how we prefer women who are good looking. A woman can be attractive and act lonely and desperate and this will signal to men that she's looking and the men will attempt to woo her, I know it's unfair but that's just the way it is. 

Rejection is a part of the game, Michael Jordan did not make every single one of his shots, but despite the failure he was dedicating to getting better at basketball. If dating is something that you want to experience, then you have to dedicating yourself to learning all you can to learn on what women like in a man and i'm not talking about being rich or being super attractive.


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

At some point you realize the game is rigged and your assets aren't even in the zone.


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## caveman8 (Sep 3, 2012)

Kovu said:


> Yes. I'm 100% sure Elephant man and Michael Jackson after the surgerys could not have gotten a partner.


The question is what does the partner look like, and what does OP expect in one?


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## jennyyyxo (Apr 3, 2015)

No one is too ugly for love because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What's ugly to one person might be absolutely beautiful to someone else, just like how what's beautiful to one person might be ugly to someone else.


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

jennyyyxo said:


> No one is too ugly for love because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What's ugly to one person might be absolutely beautiful to someone else, just like how what's beautiful to one person might be ugly to someone else.


Is it all in the mind? If we see ourselves in a negative light, others will do the same, unconsciously? What about those people who hate on themselves up and down, yet are swimming in positive attention and people willing to help them?

I guess that argument is easy to make, but there has to be some deviation. Plus, like others have said, what is defined as being unattractive varies, but there are certain characteristics that people universally find unattractive.

The beholder will not be at that person's doorstep waiting for them. The person has to continuously seek out those who they find attractive, and just hope the other person feels the same. How long this may go on depends on how adept they are at being attractive, and how much rejection they can handle.


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## Svarog11 (Jul 15, 2016)

chefdave said:


> Its not impossible I suppose but it is more of an uphill struggle.


And in the end it's almost as if you're expected to "compensate" for your bad looks through some other means and almost feel grateful you ever found anyone willing to enter a relationship with you, not only that but you're probably paired up with them more because "you're miserable alone" rather than because you're happy with them, leaving you unsatisfied still.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

RobinTurnaround said:


> O sure, YOU know what I find attractive and what not. :mum
> I think I can decide that for myself. And if you just don't want to except that beauty is different to everyone and see this as a chance then don't start such a thread. What do you want people to write under here if not that there is a chance?! Do you want us to simply pity you? Well, without me. May you drown in your "ugliness"


Of course no. Everyone have diffrent taste. But 99.99 % agree about this and that is disgusting.

My "beatuy" is the lowest "beauty" ever. So low that nobody can like it.


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

acidicwithpanic said:


> Lol just look at Steve Buscemi.


he is not very good looking, but he is not that bad. and he got nice personality and great social status.

i can never be like him.



xxDark Horse said:


> My roommate who's overweight, looks like he needs a good shower, doesn't drive, has high-functioning autism and language problems, and could pass for a legitimate neckbeard went on a date off of Zoosk and they're still dating as of 1 month and they seem happy together. I'm happy and proud of him, now it's my turn.
> 
> So if my fat hairy socially awkward roommate can have some sort of success with women, then almost anybody can. Stop beating yourself up and think positive. Put yourself out there and get ready to face rejection but think about it this way; you're just one rejection away from a girl who will finally accept you.
> 
> ...


well some people have gone their entire life alone...

only becuse the fatest man on earth and your rommate had succes it does not mean im gonna have sucess. they where just lucky. and i am more ugly than the fat man and your rommate, they have some bad things about them but i have 100s. i even write down everything bad about me one time in a map. it did reach 100+ things.



Darktower776 said:


> I don't think so. However if the guy is too insecure, low self-esteem, too bitter, etc. then yes that can stop them from finding love.


You should see me. Then if you are honest, you would agree that nobody could like the way i look.



xxDark Horse said:


> I think what can stop you from finding love is self-sabotaging thoughts about yourself and about the opposite sex.
> 
> For instance, making the assumption that every single pretty girl is out riding the cock carousel of guys who are way bigger, taller and more handsome than you and believing you could never stand a chance. Or developing a bitter attitude towards woman because of your perception of how easy they have it attracting men while you struggle to even get a date. Or getting to the point where you can't even take a single rejection.
> 
> ...


even if i had good thoughts it would not help me, becuse good thoughts cant change the truth. if i belived that i have superpowers, it does not mean i will actually get superpowers.

im not bitter towards the women. i am bitter towards myself that i look the way i do.



caveman8 said:


> The question is what does the partner look like, and what does OP expect in one?


yeah truth is that i would not want to be with a women i dont find attractive or mean. but even if i would accept anyone, still nobody would want me so it does not matter.



jennyyyxo said:


> No one is too ugly for love because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What's ugly to one person might be absolutely beautiful to someone else, just like how what's beautiful to one person might be ugly to someone else.


Yes, but sadly 0.0001 % of the earth is ugly to everyone. It is true. And sadly i am one of those.


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## DistraughtOwl (Mar 1, 2014)

He could probably get someone to suck his dick if he had money but that's not really love is it?


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## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

DistraughtOwl said:


> He could probably get someone to suck his dick if he had money but that's not really love is it?


that is not love...

i would never pay for sex


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