# Thinking about breaking up with my GF.



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

I don't know what to do. She is cute, funny, very trustworthy and has a great personality. But something bothers me.

She has huge legs. 

From the waist up, she look barely overweight, but her legs are big. 

It didn't bother me much at first but now it seems.. it does. I don't think she could ever make them thinner either, she has a bigger build.

She loves me very much, but I can't see her as a lifelong partner. 

I feel silly for not being able to get over it but still..


----------



## TrcyMcgrdy1 (Oct 21, 2011)

Lolllll, I said in another thread that you need physical attraction to complement personality, but you are taking it one step too far. She is cute, funny, has a great personality, but her legs are big? The only thing I can think fo as being shallower is maybe if her pointer was crooked. It is your choice, but consider yourself lukcy you have a girlfriend and she has a greta personality and is funny and cute.


----------



## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

Really...big legs is a deal breaker?


----------



## winesipides (Jul 10, 2012)

TPower said:


> She loves me very much, but I can't see her as a lifelong partner.


you just answered your own question.


----------



## little toaster (Jul 5, 2012)

Do you think she's too tall? Big legs + barely overweight makes me think of someone who is taller than me.


----------



## Jollygoggles (Mar 3, 2011)

Don't see her as life long partner?
Why are you there then? Time to roll.

I don't think her legs are really the issue. You're probably just looking for anything to intellectualise to yourself why you should leave.


----------



## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

wow that is shallow. I doubt you'll be able to see anyone as a lifelong partner cause, y'know, people _age_ and their bodies change, so you'll have to deal with that :/


----------



## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

You're young. Maybe you're just getting sick of her and want to play the field and sow your wild oats more. Or maybe you just need to spice things up with your gf. Have her dress sexy for you or something. Or try something "different".


----------



## Taija (Nov 3, 2008)

Well, if you're thinking about breaking up with her because of that, isn't it a clear indication that you aren't that into her after all?


----------



## winesipides (Jul 10, 2012)

meeps said:


> wow that is shallow. I doubt you'll be able to see anyone as a lifelong partner cause, y'know, people _age_ and their bodies change, so you'll have to deal with that :/


easy now. i bet you have your preferences, too. are you ready to cast the first stone? if this young man has made a mistake, perhaps it's a part of his lifelong learning process that might come in handy for him (and her) later in life.

a man who knows what he wants is desirable among you girls. why call him shallow, when you can call him decisive?


----------



## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

Taija said:


> Well, if you're thinking about breaking up with her because of that, isn't it a clear indication that you aren't that into her after all?


yes, if you really liked her you'd be able to overlook it, or not even think twice about it.



winesipides said:


> easy now. i bet you have your preferences, too. are you ready to cast the first stone? if this young man has made a mistake, perhaps it's a part of his lifelong learning process that might come in handy for him (and her) later in life.


Yeah, preferences, but the leg thing being a _deal breaker_ seems pretty extreme, and it shows he really doesn't like her all that much. I wouldn't get with someone and later decide I don't like some physical attribute they have and dump them over it, that just seems excessively shallow.



winesipides said:


> a man who knows what he wants is desirable among you girls. why call him shallow, when you can call him decisive?


.....:sus:haha


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I think TPower mentioned that he weighs less than 130 pounds before. Perhaps he is afraid of being crushed between her legs??


----------



## Nada (Dec 19, 2004)

Start going to the gym and sign her up too. Make it a goal for both of you to get in shape together.


----------



## winesipides (Jul 10, 2012)

Nada said:


> Start going to the gym and sign her up too. Make it a goal for both of you to get in shape together.


there you go.


----------



## winesipides (Jul 10, 2012)

.....:sus:haha[/QUOTE]

now you're the one being silly.


----------



## nonethemore (Oct 18, 2010)

Geez, superficial much.

I agree with the previous poster.


----------



## roseblood (Mar 1, 2010)

You cannot be serious


----------



## Jollygoggles (Mar 3, 2011)

Ostensibly it's about the legs.
In reality it's about incompatibility.


----------



## Invisiblehandicap (Jul 31, 2011)

TPower said:


> I don't know what to do. She is cute, funny, very trustworthy and has a great personality. But something bothers me.
> 
> She has huge legs.
> 
> ...


You have a fear of intimacy am I right? So you make any excuse to get away. But consciously you actually believe your conscious minds excuses. If it were that unattractive to you in reality, you would have found it unattractive in the first place. Her legs have not gotten bigger, but you have gotten closer to her.


----------



## Schizoidas (May 11, 2012)

Just out of curiosity, what would you actually tell her if you went through with this?


----------



## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

komorikun said:


> I think TPower mentioned that he weighs less than 130 pounds before. Perhaps he is afraid of being crushed between her legs??


That might explain it. I'm a short guy too. But I'm stockier (not fat). So maybe that's why I have a greater appreciation for women with some meat on them. I prefer slender legs. But if a woman is aesthetically pleasing in the face, I don't mind if she's "chubby". It's a bonus if she's "curvy" (bust, hips and ***). For a one-night stand, I wouldn't mind having sex with a butter face. But for a long-term relationship, I would rather be with a girl that was cute than have a hot bod (though a cute face AND a hot bod is a nice bonus!).


----------



## nemesis1 (Dec 21, 2009)

I used to friends with this guy who dumped his long term girlfriend for the same reason. Her legs were out of proportion to the rest of her body. She used to work real hard too with yoga and going to the gym to try and change them but couldnt. She just had naturally 'chunky' legs and he couldnt get over it.


----------



## JenN2791 (Aug 21, 2011)

I happen to find this rather offensive... since I myself have thick legs and thick thighs. It's impossible for me to get them to be very thin even, so the best I can do is tone them up nicely. I used to hate them.. esp since my ex hated them :\ but I learned to just love my body. That's pretty shallow of you. What if you were more on the chunky side as far as weight goes, and she decided to break up with you for that? I'm sure you wouldn't be too happy about that either.

I guess you just have some strict body preferences or something. Your GF sounds like she's on the "thick" side of things, which doesn't mean she's unhealthy either. She's just naturally built that way, so what the hell can she do? smh...


----------



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Invisiblehandicap said:


> You have a fear of intimacy am I right? So you make any excuse to get away. But consciously you actually believe your conscious minds excuses. If it were that unattractive to you in reality, you would have found it unattractive in the first place. Her legs have not gotten bigger, but you have gotten closer to her.


I have no fear of intimacy, we had sex dozens of time over the last few months, I practically walk around in the nude when we're home alone.


----------



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Schizoidas said:


> Just out of curiosity, what would you actually tell her if you went through with this?


Some BS story about us not being compatible or something.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Try not to settle or lower your standards next time you want a gf.


----------



## ohgodits2014 (Mar 18, 2011)

TPower said:


> Some BS story about us not being compatible or something.


Why not tell her the truth? That way when she meets someone who does like her for her she can be, like, "Yeah, one of my ex's broke up with me because he thought my legs were too big," and laugh at the idiocy instead of wasting a lot of time wondering what it was she did wrong and if there was anything she could've done to fix the relationship.

Of course, some people just want to come across as a good guy and feel good about themselves instead of thinking how their action might affect others.


----------



## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

It doesn't sound like her legs have anything to do with this. If you felt anything towards this poor girl your first thought would be for her to improve her shape while maintaining the relationship. It sounds like you just can't handle being with only one person, and that's something you'll have to grow out of. Everyone has flaws, and if you keep leaving people in the dirt because you "don't see them as long-term material" you'll soon find yourself alone and the only thing you'll have to call a partner is a fifth of scotch.


----------



## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

If her weight is bothering you let her go if you are no longer attracted to her. She deserves someone who will care about her regardless of her weight.


----------



## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I guess women really do have a reason to be paranoid about their looks and must always strive for perfection.


----------



## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

^Hah!


----------



## Loveless (Apr 6, 2012)

If I actually got a girl and her legs were chunky I would not give ten *****. I just find this stupid on your part.


----------



## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

I seriously am thinking it's fear of commitment. But I could be projecting onto you.

Even if a girl is really cute, there are certain things that would make me commitment-phobic. It's not just about looks. ie. Does she satisfy my sexual needs? Does she have the same thirst for sexual adventure? (or will she at least agree to an open relationship where I can seek that out?) Is she bat**** crazy? Is she trust worthy? Is she going to dump you and then take half your wealth and make you pay alimony? How good is she with managing finances? Is the passion going to die out in the future?

A female friend of mine put it best. Men think short-term when they choose mates. Women think long-term. It's not until afterwards where men go "oh ****! I can't commit to this woman!" lol.


----------



## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

R91 said:


> Break up with her. She deserves someone who will appreciate her body as it is.


Preach it.



phoenixwright said:


> I seriously am thinking it's fear of commitment.


That's what first came into mind. You're probably looking for the smallest things that annoy you to break up with her. There's nothing wrong with not wanting to be in a relationship, but don't turn the issue around and make it seem like there's a problem with her.

When you break up with her, do her a favor and say it's because she's a ***** and not because she has "fat legs," which is probably untrue (especially if she weights under 130lbs).


----------



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

AllToAll said:


> Preach it.
> 
> That's what first came into mind. You're probably looking for the smallest things that annoy you to break up with her. There's nothing wrong with not wanting to be in a relationship, but don't turn the issue around and make it seem like there's a problem with her.
> 
> When you break up with her, do her a favor and say it's because she's a ***** and not because she has "fat legs," which is probably untrue (especially if she weights under 130lbs).


She weights 155.


----------



## River In The Mountain (Jun 6, 2011)

phoenixwright said:


> A female friend of mine put it best. Men think short-term when they choose mates. Women think long-term. It's not until afterwards where men go "oh ****! I can't commit to this woman!" lol.


Odd, a male friend of mine told me the opposite of that.


----------



## winesipides (Jul 10, 2012)

TPower said:


> She weights 155.


how tall? :blank


----------



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

winesipides said:


> how tall? :blank


About five-three.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Google an image of what 5'3' 155 looks like.


----------



## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

rdrr said:


> Google an image of what 5'3' 155 looks like.


The pics i'm getting look fine to me.


----------



## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

That's a mean thing to consider - legs?

I have big legs and they are Millenniummanly! Hardly a deal breaker, I could probably hold the lady up during....well, that's for my future WIFE to find out. :banana


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

meeps said:


> The pics i'm getting look fine to me.


That's my point.


----------



## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

TPower said:


> She weights 155.


Wow, what a fatso...?

:roll


----------



## offbyone (May 5, 2010)

meeps said:


> The pics i'm getting look fine to me.


Indeed.

This is the same tpower who made a ton of posts on how hard guys have it finding someone, yadda yadda, right?


----------



## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

offbyone said:


> Indeed.
> 
> This is the same tpower who made a ton of posts on how hard guys have it finding someone, yadda yadda, right?


:lol

5'3 and 155lbs varies although I still don't get the point of having to look at a woman that size and height to "understand" why TPower isn't attracted to his GF...


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

AllToAll said:


> :lol
> 
> 5'3 and 155lbs varies although I still don't get the point of having to look at a woman that size and height to "understand" why TPower isn't attracted to his GF...


No, its to understand that there is nothing wrong with being 5'3' and 155. That's the point I was trying to make. A random guy can't tell what 5'3' 155 would look like anyway on a woman.


----------



## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

offbyone said:


> Indeed.
> 
> This is the same tpower who made a ton of posts on how hard guys have it finding someone, yadda yadda, right?


That's right.

Most female attention I get is from overweight women. I'm thin.


----------



## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

TPower said:


> That's right.
> 
> Most female attention I get is from overweight women. I'm thin.


Augh, it must be soooo hard for you.












rdrr said:


> No, its to understand that there is nothing wrong with being 5'3' and 155. That's the point I was trying to make.* A random guy can't tell what 5'3' 155 would look like anyway on a woman*.


Well I definitely agree with you there.

The rest seems so obvious to me that I thought you might have been arguing something else.


----------



## meeps (Dec 5, 2011)

AllToAll said:


> Augh, it must be soooo hard for you.


:haha


----------



## TrcyMcgrdy1 (Oct 21, 2011)

AllToAll said:


> Augh, it must be soooo hard for you.


Well, it is super hard when you are super fabulous and shallow. Duh!!!!


----------



## MaxPower (May 1, 2012)

TPower said:


> She has huge legs.


That sounds like a reason from Seinfeld. If this is the case, I say end it, she deserves someone better than you. However, something tells me you're looking for a reason to end the relationship, even if it's a stupid one. It could be a fear of intimacy or commitment, whatever it is you need to look into yourself and find it, and I think you did.



TPower said:


> She loves me very much, but *I can't see her as a lifelong partner*.


Ask yourself why is that the case.


----------



## Loveless (Apr 6, 2012)

T power seems like a tool.


----------

