# My mother trying to make me jealous.



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Our relationship has been pretty rocky for the longest time now, with her always trying to start an argument with me every time we interact, and I trying to avoid as much interactions with her as much as possible due to this. 

Knowing this, she told me she has befriended another girl who lived close by to her (she lives in another state) that was around my age. She told me they have really hit it off, and they talk about everything. Eventually she told me, she literally sees her as a god daughter, and how nice it was to finally have a "daughter" that appreciates her as a mother. 

After hearing this, I was surprised I wasn't even jealous. In fact, I had a small sense of relieve as the first thought in my head was "does this mean she will now pay less focus on me, and more focus on her?" This is so, as any focus she's had on me has always been the primary source of most of my stress and anxiety. 

I guess this confirms that, deep down I don't even care for her affection and love anymore, but mainly for her be away from me..


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

> she told me she has befriended another girl who lived close by to her that was around my age.


 That seems strange to me.

I mean I'm all for people looking past age-gaps for friendships...but still.

(is your mum Ronnie Wood?)


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## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Arteriax said:


> I practically cut off interaction with my father, though we still live in the same house. I can sort of see he feels guilty and bitter about it, but he has too much pride to humble himself so I don't really care about him at all.
> 
> If your mother's already that annoying, you should just act callous around her and hint that you pay little importance to whatever comes out of her mouth. Tbh, it's not that big of a deal that you don't care for her love and affection anymore because there was already a fundamental flaw to begin with, if I infer - She only used you as an object of selfish love when she gave birth; as do most parents...


Yeah, I've already played that card for many years, and she wasn't fond of it at all. Eventually she decided she would have no more of my icy attitude towards her and it led to years of constant arguments and turmoil, which stressed me out a lot and drained me, while she seemed to enjoy it. So eventually you could say she won, and I went back to putting on that fake undignifying smile in front of her.

It's good to see that at least this apporach works out for you with your dad. My mom has been a lifelong constantly adapting narcissistic puzzle that I have yet to cracked. Like a virus that ever ending adapts to any new antibiotics.



TicklemeRingo said:


> That seems strange to me.
> 
> I mean I'm all for people looking past age-gaps for friendships...but still.
> 
> (is your mum Ronnie Wood?)


I guess there are some who are so friendly and carefree that they would be open to friendship to just about anyone if they're nice enough. I do admit, outside of my family, my mom is a very nice and kind person. Just wish she would treat her kids the same way.

Rolling Stones Ronnie Wood? I don't get it..


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

Blue Dino said:


> Rolling Stones Ronnie Wood? I don't get it..


Sorry. My bad joke. He was in the news a while back for having a 19 y/o girlfriend.

Good luck with your mum.


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## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

TicklemeRingo said:


> Sorry. My bad joke. He was in the news a while back for having a 19 y/o girlfriend.
> 
> Good luck with your mum.


Thanks. I just knew he was married to some very young model.


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## CJanene (Jan 16, 2015)

Blue Dino said:


> Our relationship has been pretty rocky for the longest time now, with her always trying to start an argument with me every time we interact, and I trying to avoid as much interactions with her as much as possible due to this.
> 
> Knowing this, she told me she has befriended another girl who lived close by to her (she lives in another state) that was around my age. She told me they have really hit it off, and they talk about everything. Eventually she told me, she literally sees her as a god daughter, and how nice it was to finally have a "daughter" that appreciates her as a mother.
> 
> ...


My mom has done the exact same thing except hers is a little creepy. She knows I have SA and she doesn't really care. She always talks about men she meets (which makes her sounds more like a hooker). Her most recent one is 'friend' that lives in California and he offered to pick her up and take her to L.A. for the summer. She said she dgaf what me and my sister does but she's gonna 'party' because she is 'not as old as we make her out to be' and she still 'has some life in her'.

Now I realize she is trying to get a rise out of me and she is competing with me. Its so sad. She tries to date 22 year old guys but I'm closer to their age then she is, I think it weirds them out.


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## Spungo (Jul 30, 2012)

CJanene said:


> she's gonna 'party' because she is 'not as old as we make her out to be' and she still 'has some life in her'.


This is just sad. Oh well, whatever makes her happy. There's nothing wrong with having one last series of casual flings before men no longer find her attractive.


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## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

CJanene said:


> My mom has done the exact same thing except hers is a little creepy. She knows I have SA and she doesn't really care. She always talks about men she meets (which makes her sounds more like a hooker). Her most recent one is 'friend' that lives in California and he offered to pick her up and take her to L.A. for the summer. She said she dgaf what me and my sister does but she's gonna 'party' because she is 'not as old as we make her out to be' and she still 'has some life in her'.
> 
> Now I realize she is trying to get a rise out of me and she is competing with me. Its so sad. She tries to date 22 year old guys but I'm closer to their age then she is, I think it weirds them out.


Yeah it sounds like your mom is just going through that typical "getting old" crisis, especially with your description sounding like she's single.


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