# Make up a rumour about the above user



## hbk4894 (Sep 2, 2014)

Just for fun


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## 629753 (Apr 7, 2015)

Haha, I was thinking about this. The Universe sure repays your positivity and vice versa


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

i heard he keeps his grandmother's ashes in one of her old cookie jars instead of an urn. He asks for her spirit to watch over the mint fudge brownies while they bake.


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## Alkalinity (Mar 10, 2013)

I heard she made out with a hot dog.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

She eats batteries.


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## Ominous Indeed (Sep 6, 2015)

I heard she powers up her house by running on a thread mill, and that's how everyone got to know her by the username "Alkalinity".

EMERGGOOD, well give me 2 seconds.

I heard he is a crazy scientist that experiments on what happens if you put two guys that both believe they are Jesus in the same fighting pit.


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

They like to spread orange peels all over their body.


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

You are friends with Bill Clinton.


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## hbk4894 (Sep 2, 2014)

Had their first kiss at a school disco


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Injured his lower back whilst twerking.


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## Kovu (Jun 18, 2013)

He's coming to Charlotte to play for the Hornets.


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## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Wants to go to school to study bovine psychology but isn't sure if he can cut the cheese!


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Always thinking about groping butts - even the males.


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

I heard this guy wants to run for president 0_o


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has a giant crush on Bruce Willis.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

He once scared a 100 kids at a birthday party.


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## ActuallyBrittany (Jun 30, 2016)

He walks all 50 of his cats in the grocery store and lets eat the fish in the produce section.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

She moved to Argentina and got a sex change.


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## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

He is moving to Argentina for someone he met through SAS. Congrats btw, I think you make a beautiful couple.


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## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Thinking about being like Van Gogh and becoming Van Brittany but wants to keep her ears intact and thinks stars are black hole wannabes.


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He got arrested for stealing a tire out of someone else's garage


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's going to Harvard


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Wears high heels while playing basketball to give himself a height advantage. 

You didn't hear this from me...


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

@Karsten is not actually a doctor


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

She failed her English exam.


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## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

He has an affair with LeBron.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Is a former Nazi SS officer seeking refuge in South America.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He runs the Italian Mafia.


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## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

He passed geography.

@Karsten I "wish". If you run the syndicate we can make some business, though.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He touched Messi in certain places whilst he was in jail.


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's an alien


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Still screams at older people on Xbox live that he slept with their moms.
_Staff note - This rumour was for sajs_


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## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

He doesn't play Xbox live anymore because he found what I said was true. I am sorry, send my regards to your mom, though.


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

has a collection of houseplants instead of children and calls them all by name


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## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

She goes to a bookstore to steal books even though she says she does not.


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He wears a dress when he's a home alone


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Distant cousin of Adolf Hitler


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## PsychoChan (Mar 8, 2016)

He glues tiny bits of cat hair all over his body believing that someday he will become a cat.. :3


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## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Is an owner of approx. 277 cats, one bird and two snails :b


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## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

his cupcakes are fortified with tannis root, eye of newt, dracunculus worms and things that will make you smell like your grandmother included.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

^Has a secret room where illegal activities occur


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's human.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

^Owns an invisibility cloak but uses it for evil


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## jjoohhnn (Jul 24, 2016)

Collects used condoms


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He strokes it with his left hand.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

^Resurrects the dead but kills them again


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## jjoohhnn (Jul 24, 2016)

Makes own novelty socks


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

Buys and collects hand-made novelty socks.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is an alien disguised as a human


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## jjoohhnn (Jul 24, 2016)

Throws milk at dogs


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's an orb.


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## jjoohhnn (Jul 24, 2016)

Has three knees


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## EmyMax (Sep 26, 2014)

Buys Apple products and re-sells them as Microsoft products.


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## jjoohhnn (Jul 24, 2016)

Killed a priest in Verona


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is from another univserse


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He likes men.


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## jjoohhnn (Jul 24, 2016)

Sleeps in an abattoir


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Built his own civilization underwater


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Can fit 5 chicken eggs in his mouth


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Used to keep a pet chicken in a diaper and slept on the floor so it could have the bed.


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## Notgoingout (Mar 19, 2015)

The Library of Emma said:


> Used to keep a pet chicken in a diaper and slept on the floor so it could have the bed.


That was easily the funniest one on here!

Anyway, once put a bucket on an old woman's head (around 96) and then proceeded, as she was trying to get it off, to stuff big macs into the woman's handbag and then stalked her home, laughing when she went to put her hand into her handbag for keys but felt the big macs and screamed.


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## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

Goes into shops just to knock the displays over, and then climbs to the top of the shelf to hide.


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## JustThisGuy (Mar 24, 2012)

Eats fetuses out of the dumpsters of abortion clinics.


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Isn't really a moderator, but no one knows how to quite get rid of her.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Invites people to his place but they're never heard from again


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is part fish


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## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Was part fish


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

^Is the king of plagiarism


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's really a goldfish named steve and has a bow tie, a cane, and a top hat.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's Steve Nash's son.


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## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

One of the most popular basketball players and athlete worldwide currently has social anxiety.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has good grades due to hacking the school computer


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's a mon.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Has a thing for bald women


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has been banning people since birth


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He has god like powers but doesn't know how to use them


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to steal carrot noses from snowmen.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects toenails and uses them as seasoning


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's Tom Cruise's long lost brother


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Serves guests salt water from the ocean


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## FlowerLover (Jul 21, 2016)

The person above me eats babies.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

She hates flowers.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects animal bones


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's a mon.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Believes he created the Internet


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's 69 years old.


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Doesn't know where babies come from


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a collection of rotting bugs


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's married to @Alostgirl.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

He doesn't know how babies are made


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Believes dinosaurs didnt exist


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He beat Russell Westbrook in a game of 1-on-1.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Could possibly be a Stephanie.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Is lesbian.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has more than 1 account


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is secretly in love with @Neo


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Does the robot dance when he's alone


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

*Only* gives out tootsie rolls at Halloween


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Breaks into buildings and steals office supplies


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Entire house is made out of clay


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Entire house is made out of Klay Thompson


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Does Experiments on baby aliens


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Does experiments with his own faeces


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Makes up rumors about everyone


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's from Mars.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Carries a bottle of acid in his pocket


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Carries a bottle of whiskey in his pocket.


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## TheWarrior (Jul 9, 2016)

Likes to kiss himself in the mirror.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Enjoys licking armpits.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Enjoys orbiting around mons.


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## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Walks around in sunglasses, black trench coat, has the ability to dodge bullets, and recently went on a murdering rampage on a russian mafia when one of their men brutally murdered his newly acquired puppy.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He was the main individual who convinced Kevin Durant to sign with the Warriors.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Too focused on Durant's perfection.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

She's not confusing.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

He's never confusing.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

She's not addicted to SAS.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

He's never sarcastic.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

She's definitely not obsessed with repeatedly banning and making rumours about me...


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Thinks too much,wtf.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

She has an issues with betas like @Going crazy


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## May19 (Apr 25, 2012)

She's secretly sleeping with Donald Trump


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

^Used to be in the chatroom often


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## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)

she's a beta who likes Hillary


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is actually from North Korea.


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## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)

is having an affair


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is a cat from Mongolia who escaped to Iran and is currently seeking refuge in Chicago.


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## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)

lol that is funny,
she secretly loves beta mons


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Can be fooled easily


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's not a bot.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Person above likes to annoy people and raise blood pressure, be warned.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has toenail fungus


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Got kidnapped by aliens on purpose..


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Alostgirl said:


> Person above likes to annoy people and raise blood pressure, be warned.


That isn't even a rumour, you're just telling people BS about me like it's a fact. Guess you don't want to talk to me anymore, cool I understand.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's joining the Cleveland Cavaliers.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is that person in class that reminds the teacher about handing out homework


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He speaks Farsi.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cuts up money into pieces in front of the homeless


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Eats food in front of starving kids.


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## theDiff (Jun 29, 2016)

Abandons starving kids at restaurants.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Kidnaps starving kids at restaurants.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

StephCurry said:


> That isn't even a rumour, you're just telling people BS about me like it's a fact. Guess you don't want to talk to me anymore, cool I understand.


Wth? I don't even know what to say. You didn't even clarify with me anything and you just jump to assumptions. I fail to understand why you would take my posts on these threads seriously, I was just joking FYI. I would have removed it if you wanted me to.


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## theDiff (Jun 29, 2016)

StephCurry said:


> Kidnaps starving kids at restaurants.


Covets my candy van.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to smash tomatoes with his toes


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

has not gotten the cootie shot


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Pulls the pets tail cause they _'like the noise it makes_


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

uses a women's razor to shave his pubes


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Doesn't shave his pubes... insists it smells and looks better when it's long


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

puts mustard on his french fries


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to sleep in the shower :O


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a bad scammer


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is half alien and half robot.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sits down & Reads a book in the middle of the street at midnight


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Doesn't know how to differentiate between apples and oranges. oh no


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is the Hash Slinging Slasher


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Wears their socks inside out for good luck.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has her own library


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is obsessed with Spongebob


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

House is infested with bugs & rodents but doesn't mind them being there


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually from the Neolithic time period


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

His dreams are always in Russian, although he doesn't understand a word of it.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Tells the legless to "walk it off"


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

His #1 way to make people laugh is using an Asian accent and walk around pretending to sell eggrolls for 3.50


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's not bald.


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

uses chopsticks to eat all his food, even his ice cream.


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## Ominous Indeed (Sep 6, 2015)

Can't actually read


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Actually has chlamydia.


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

His favorite sport is really Golf


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

@*StephCurry* 
Actually lost to Lebron in the Finals to settle a bet between whether McDonalds or Burger King was better.
@*Halfhardtim3s* 
His favorite game is actually Candy Crush


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He thought Kevin Love should've won Finals MVP.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sent an audition tape for the Bad Girls Club


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

In love with @Neo.


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Is strongly against breastfeeding in public


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Broke something valuable but blamed it on the disabled


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is secretly dating Ayesha Curry


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Hides in the janitors closet and goes into a fetal position every Monday


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Spreads Neoism


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Spreads facism (and secretly owns his own country called Curryville in which he's the dictator)


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Spreads Neoism after dark


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Spreads syphilis 
@SoundsOfSilence is possibly aware of my country where all inhabitants are elite 3-point shooters.


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## EmyMax (Sep 26, 2014)

Think he is the Postal "Dude", and goes on a rampage every morning.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Sleeps with monkeys


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He sh*ts in the shower.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

He's oppressive to the inhabitants of Curryville, and as a result, they are rebellious (not to mention dangerous with those sniper skills of theirs)


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Kills whenever he sleep walks


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## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Snacks on the earwax of blonde hair children.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Eats dinner at 3 AM on Wednesdays. Alone.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Is to soon be assassinated by a Curryville rebel.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is soon to be overthrown by the Curryville revolutionaries


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Steals candies from kids and eats them because his a badass.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is rumored to be found living in a dumpster in downtown L.A... apparently not lost.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Rumored to be the lost heir of the Apollo tribe.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses counterfeit money


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is on a quest to making the world great again


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Fled the Netherlands to live with their drunk relatives who bake cookies in burger grease.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Fled to Curryville only to be rejected by the inhabitants.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Fled to the NBA only to lose to LeBron in the final game of the Finals.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Prefers brown sugar compared to white sugar since his health conscious.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Loves to garden (not that it's bad, cause I do it too lol )


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Knows LeBron will never win another championship.


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## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

notorious c.a.t. burglar.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is a kind thug from da hood.


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## JustSmileZee (Nov 16, 2012)

fought off cthulhu but doesnt tell anyone.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Doesn't smile often, despite username.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He actually lives in Iran.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Has a phobia of height


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## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

28 July, 2016 

THE MINT EXAMINER-REVIEW-GAZETTE 

"LOST GIRL SECRETLY FOUND" 

Source close to Girl says: "She's been found, lying about her lost status to keep her true identity secret! The shocking revelation made Oprah, Ellen, and Dr. Phil cry!"


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

I heard he named his daughter after a celebrity gossip magazine.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Attempted to lick the tip of a mushroom.


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## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

@Karsten

28 July 2016

THE MINT EXAMINER-REVIEW-GAZETTE SPECIAL SECOND EDITION

"KLOWN KARS AND TEN CALLS"

A source close to a kloWN has revealed secret details regarding TEN CALLS, the kloWN made towards PAYING OFF A HUGE DEBT WITH THE ANONYMOUS CIRCUS COOKIE CENTERS OF AMERICA.
SOURCE ALSO CLAIMS kloWN RAN AWAY from P.T. Barnum AND REFUSES TO SELL PEANUTS TO LOCAL SCHOOLCHILDREN!

The kloWN recently dropped a BOMBSHELL earlier this month, when he announced his NAME CHANGE to KARSTEN.


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Cleans toilets. And gets paid for it.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Cleans toilets. For free.


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

In love with @flyingMint


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

Stephen secretly loves the beach and wants to come running on Kuta Beach with me in Bali.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

In love with bali


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Eats chips on Sundays


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes to rip fishes in half like a piece of paper


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Likes to rip papers in half like they're some sort of fish.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes sniffing peoples dirty socks


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Gets off when others create rumors about him.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Closes down children's lemonade stands


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Somehow he justifies coercing preteens into selling lemonade for him (watered down I might add). He takes 75% of the profits as these kids work 8+ hours a day in the blistering heat. What was I supposed to do? Let this go on?


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Teaches children about tax by eating 30% of their ice cream


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Drinks seawater


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Salts snails then chews them like gum


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## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Currently leads a secret elite tactical group of enhanced white feral cats to carry out secret government sanctioned assassinations.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Looks up to the Queen for her sense of fashion.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a room where she conducts controversial experiments on animals


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Gropes the mannequins butt and breasts at clothing stores


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Secretly owns a hidden factory in the woods that produces ugly sweaters


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Leaves dead bugs in packaged foods


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## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

Once worked as Barney the dinosaur


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually part fish


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## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

Is the pope


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## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Rumored to be a spy working for aliens from another planet.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sells children's toys with lead in them


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Sells children.


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## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)

banned for making such extreme rumor about that man , never mind he deserves it. Wrong thread? **** it


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's sane.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sells expired products


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## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Eats expired yogurt.


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## EmyMax (Sep 26, 2014)

Secretly works for Jeff Goldblum.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Aspires to be one of the greatest innovators known to mankind.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was held back 5 times in school


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Woos girls with cheesy pick-up lines.


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## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

When at a friends house, and no one is in the room, likes to pull down her pants, and then rub her hoohaa cooties on everything.


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

@Baldy Nohairs

Can't sleep without gum in his mouth and got it stuck in his hair. That's why he's bald.


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Went bald at a young age, what a pity.


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Wears clothing inside out to show off the brand label on the tag.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes adding dead ants into her drink


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

keeps chewed gum in back pockets to save for later


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to drink coffee without brushing his teeth. @Amon
@The Library of Emma
Likes to wear makeup to bed.


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Like to adding Wasps to her food


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Sits on his couch for 2 hours everyday and contemplates over the mysteries of humanity.


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Drinks toilet water


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

sings karaoke for the workers in fast food drive thrus


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Isn't actually pensive all the time


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## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has never owned an Xbox.


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Halfhardtim3s said:


> Isn't actually pensive all the time


how did you know?


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Clips her toenails and eats them


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

The Library of Emma said:


> how did you know?


Just a lucky guess >

Eats his fingernails for breakfast


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## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually a 50 year old trapped in a 14 year old body


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## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Is a 90 year old man trapped inside a....20 something year old body? Idk how old you are


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## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Plans to rule Iran soon.


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## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

sings in the rain


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She locked herself in the car 3 times in one day


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Wakes up at 7:00 pm every day.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Shakes a woman's hand so he knows what they feel like and can imagine it when he pleasures himself


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Actually fled back to Canada because the weather in Arkansas was too warm for him (and that explains why he needed no hair, too)


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Dreams of mushrooms.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Believes all women should always wear a bra, and never go braless in public.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Believes that cats deserve equality.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

They do!

Believes bald people are the root of all evil


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Tricks people into thinking that his raisin cookies are chocolate


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

mysterious


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Believes that fires can't be ignited without a single match.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Dissects dead flies


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is in love with @StephCurry.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Enjoys cleaning up portable bathrooms


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

is confused by simple things, and brushes teeth with a hairbrush


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows Flight 370 exact location


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Drinks toilet water at times as the bacteria is a turn on.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Actually keeps the people she bans the most in her basement


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is repulsed by cooties :X


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Is a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit model


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Originally thought that being exposed to radiation would give him special powers


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Actually got powers from radiation


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Walks outside at midnight while making odd noises


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to steal women's clothes.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Likes to steal men's clothes


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is that person who makes noise in the library


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's a minion who eats your potatos


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a minions minion


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's a minion baby


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a lower class minion in a minions mansion


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's actually Jar Jar Binks


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Can use his feet as boomerangs


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Is actually 41.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Records everybody's IP addresses


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is actually a real human being :O


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes eating the mold off of walls


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Has a fetish for algaes and amoebas.


----------



## EmyMax (Sep 26, 2014)

Alostgirl said:


> Aspires to be one of the greatest innovators known to mankind.


Indeed. That is so true


----------



## EmyMax (Sep 26, 2014)

She's the secret lover of Leonardo Dicaprio.


----------



## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)

has fake earlobes


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Hair is actually a wig


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's a caveman


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Believes the world is 6000 years old


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Doesn't know pickles are cucumbers


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

*Is actually bald*


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has tried every hair growth product known to mankind.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Has temperature-taking fetish


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes to sleep with dead corpses


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Offers to help blind people and walks them to the wrong place


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Hes not really worried


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

is actually 41


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Pushes people towards the train tracks as the train approaches


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He proposed to me (I said no).


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Actually said yes


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Can't speak Farsi.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a bowl of curry,named it Steph


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Dresses as Santa and slaps children while their parents aren't watching


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Old lady in wheelchair asked him to take her somewhere relaxing,so he pushed her off a cliff


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Slept with a 69 year old woman.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Had sex with a 69 year old women, but didn't sleep afterwards.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He knows how to spell 'woman'.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Has a neighbor with Alzheimer's. Goes to him everyday and tells him his only child has died a painful death.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is an otherkin


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is from the future(that's why he has 12k posts)


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Made the original user "Pouria" disappear


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Went on a date with a klown


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a collection of photos from the "Post a pic of yourself" thread


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

A monster (the good kind tho)


----------



## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

Barakiel likes monsters.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants to replace the human race with artificial beings


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to make out with a wall.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was on a reality tv series but quit after the 1st episode


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is in love with @StephCurry.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Failed Elementary Algebra


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is very confused about his gender


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a 2nd account to troll


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to give people rusty items as presents:/


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Got the user "ALostBoy" banned


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to roam around amusement parks with a bright red paint on his nose.


----------



## 2Milk (Oct 29, 2014)

Would still wet the bed at the age of 16.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Spent 19 years searching for a lost boy that was never to be found again.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Dances in the streets when she sleepwalks


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

once vomited in class after eating too many chocolate globbernaughts


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Bullied a small Chinese kid


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to walk with his eyes closed.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

does not pay tax


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was once able to bypass the 50 post limit


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

The oldest person to climb the Everest mountain at the wise old age of 70


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

^ Has amnesia


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Has amnesia since he's 70, but is kind of in denial, but its cool.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once did a cannonball in a puddle of water


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

is actually not a fan of punctuation marks


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Complains about cultural appropriation in a foreign restaurant


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is a part of the notorious italian mafia


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is part of the celery stick mafia


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Amon is actually a mon.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Plays Hide and seek with people but abandons the game once shes done counting.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to eat raw eggs mixed with fresh lime juice :O


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants to hook up with somebody on here


----------



## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

'Cause like this is totally original...you are totally lost baby. She is totally lost.

Err... Edit: You're an Egyptian something-or-other. haha


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Doesn't know how to make cereal


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Are you Israeli? Iranian? Arab? I give up on trying to guess lol


----------



## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

YOU don't know how to make cereal! :b


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

wanted to surprise her new crush with an awesome home-cooked dinner. stepped into the kitchen, started cooking and the kitchen burned down.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Secretly wishes Hitler won the war



Amon said:


> Complains about cultural appropriation in a foreign restaurant


I laughed the snot outta my nose on this one, lol.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

bought a ring to propose to @Karsten...and Karsten said yes and accepted the ring(and sold it afterwards).


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Bought the ring from Karsten


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

hates reading but loves writing. dichotomy x10000.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

:roll

Only drinks goat milk


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is anti-lost girls (btw, how did you get your hair back)


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Loves when men get lost and are too stubborn to ask for direction.




I was never, ever bald in my life. I've always had hair, lol :grin2:


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Puts his victims in the oven & falls asleep listening to their screams


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Watches crime shows so he can learn the perfect way to kill someone


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Will go bald at the age of 50,so his name will be Baldy Nomohairs


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is a 70 year old cereal killer in hiding. someone should call the CBI( Cereal Bureau of Investigation)
...


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is secretly a moderator and looks through peoples private messages


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Secretly wants to hook up with someone from here.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Makes snow demons instead of snow angels


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is secretly a kind person beneath his mysterious demeanor, and likes to help people


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

*Hates * kids


----------



## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Was the first person to successfully combine the skills of gymnastics and karate and became the real life inspiration for the film "Gymkata"


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Name was supposed to be Spongebob but made several typos


----------



## EmyMax (Sep 26, 2014)

He's actually a reincarnation of the great God Of Sun, Amon-Ra.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Hes a Wookie


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects animal tails


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Is actually an alien.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once splashed acid on his teacher for giving him an A-


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

often mistaken for a pokemon


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Has a thing for adults wearing braces.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Is a collector of dental appliances.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

collector of STI's


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Leaves sharp objects on chairs


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Sits on sharp objects.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes sitting on pink colored objects


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Everything he sees is pink


----------



## sharktopusrex (Jul 31, 2016)

Will only listen to audiobooks read by Morgan Freeman exclusively.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Every time he tells somebody to "Break a leg", they end up breaking their leg


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He hates Beacon


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Serves uncooked Crabs to his customers


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Throws used condoms at people he dislikes.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a collection of dead rodents


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He's orbital.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually an Android


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is capable of saying more than a few words.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Stole my time machine


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to freeze aloe vera gel.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She's really a turkey


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Watches people get mugged,then mugs the mugger


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to throw bricks at his neighbor's windows whenever they blast his favorite music


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has met up with somebody from here


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Is an alien disguised as a Russian spy who works for the Canadian government and speaks Chinese.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

The odor from her feet is enough to corrode the steel off a bridge


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Is D.B. Cooper living in a nursing home wearing adult diapers 24/7.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

They say that even to this day she's still blarghhing


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is attracted to women.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Wanders on empty streets at night searching for the answers to life


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Kidnaps people and decorates them like dolls


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

worships the ground I walk on


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lies 24/7


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

believes the world is flat


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a room filled with tech but doesn't know how they operate


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Has a basement filled with creepy stuffed animals that come alive during the night, creep up the stairs, and jump onto the beds while they sleep.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has an underground factory where robots are made


----------



## Kovu (Jun 18, 2013)

Very afraid of giraffes


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Makes bombs in his basement


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

A monkey


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Fights feral raccoons around the neighborhood.


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Harvests Africanized honey bees in her backyard.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to steal oranges from Becky's backyard.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Once threw an elderly woman's glasses into the Pacific Ocean.


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Has a secret parasitic twin who is covered with maternity clothing.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Went to school during a holiday


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

First man to give birth.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Constantly having wardrobe malfunctions, to the point you think it's on purpose.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Actually born in Kansas


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Beat Stephen Curry in a game of H.O.R.S.E


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Was blackmailed by LeBron


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Dunked on LeBron


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Broke up with Ayesha Curry


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Is actually a pebble, not a rock


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is actually a dishwasher, not a professional basketball player


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Knows too much.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Knows the secret to the universe


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows the secrets to many things


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Knows the secret to eternal life, yet refuses to share it


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Drinks from the fountain of youth


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Knows if Steph Curry actually likes curry.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thought real life was a video game due to playing GTA 24/7


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Went on several dates with @Neo but eventually decided he wasn't his type.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Thought life was a box of chocolates


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once thought there was a burglar in his house,so he aimed his gun at the target and fired..turned out it was his pet dog..


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows everybody's dirty secrets


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Serial killer.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cereal Killer


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Has a cereal fetish


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Despite his name, he's never tried curry in his life, nor has he any knowledge of what it is.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

^^ Lol that's actually true :lol Never had curry in my life, looks/smells unpleasant to me.

Is capable of reading minds


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is that loud person in the library


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Is that guy who pees on the librarian


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is that loud person with the gangster music and sagging pants at school


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Goes to the bathroom and drinks from the toilet


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is that person at work who eats other peoples lunches


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Has been saving ever penny they've found in a giant water container for their whole life, yet there's barely a handful so far


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ironically lives in a noisy environment


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

does not care for peppermint


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Despite their current mood on their profile, they are wide awake


----------



## JustThisGuy (Mar 24, 2012)

Is cooler than she thinks.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Lives in Uzbekistan.


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Has a wife who thinks she's a great celebrity cook when all she has is just the typical cooking skills of a regular average housewife.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

:lol

He's secretly a Knicks fan.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Comes to my house every Friday so we can wear ladies' underwear together.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to chase after cats at night.


----------



## The Starry night (May 23, 2015)

secretly watches dorky shows


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Is actually 17.


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Has a younger brother who secretly wants to murder him when he has the chance and take on his identity and fame.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lives in Bayview/Hunters point


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is capable of producing fire by rubbing his hands together.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants to secretly destroy Neo and his kingdom


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Wants to live in Curryville


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Curryville is the place where they practice satanism


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is packing his bags to live in my kingdom of the lost


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cleans the toilet with her toothbrush and uses it to brush her teeth afterwards


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

hates lost girls.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes diving into a mountain of manure


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to wear dresses and lipstick


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes having long,sharp toenails to stab people with


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is married to monica @Neo


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is in a polyamorous relationship with Kevin001 & StephCurry


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is married to four women and has 20 children


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

dreams of being a race car driver


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

doesn't wash hands after using the washroom.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

is not really Canadian but calls bathrooms washrooms


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is not Chinese but likes to watch Hong Kong films


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

still uses the term phat


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is a noob when it comes to the art of seduction


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

is on the waiting list for adult braces


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses used diapers as pillows


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

hates unicycles for no reason at all


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has visited the Bermuda Triangle with his Illuminati team


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is a noob when it comes to the art of banning :O


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

drinks milk out of a bag


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

tried to climb the greatest wall of china once...while sleepwalking. failed.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a Twitter account for her pet ant


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Amon's original name is Christian.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is a noob when it comes to original ideas


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is a noob when it comes to solving anthropological questions


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Can silence a whole room with just one word


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is actually a starving musician who is poor and singing on the streets for money


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

teared up once when eating an apple apple. reminded him of the apple pie that @Amon made for him during their first date :')


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Enjoys hearing people gag


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Paid the Wachowsky brothers $10 to make a 4th Matrix.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Would be an excellent violinist if not for her compulsive urge to smash delicate objects.


----------



## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

Has never actually watched a movie. Just reads the wikipedia summaries whenever someone brings a movie up.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is bored 24/7


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Is part of some Korean luciferian society


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

The very first of the Shy


----------



## The Starry night (May 23, 2015)

Is a bad school kid with an attittude problem :/


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

'North of England' means Greenland apparently. This person is a hermit in an igloo.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

His username is his porn name


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Posts videos of himself flushing objects down the toilet


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Eats cereal but doesn't drink the milk


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Once sucked the tip of a mushroom.























And liked it.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is obsessed with mushroom tips


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Has a fetish for mushroom tips.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Enjoys listening to people screaming


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Enjoys screaming for me.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Soiled his pants but never washed them


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a tail


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Married to @Alostgirl.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects peoples sweat in a jar


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Wakes up every morning and becomes intrigued by the sight of his own hand.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Stopped supporting the Warriors ever since KD joined them.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Built a tree house, but it collapsed after a raindrop came into contact with it


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Is actually an anthropomorphic computer monitor.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a serial killer who works as a 911 operator


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

treats parallel parking like playing bumper cars


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She can walk on water


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

shoplifts stripy socks


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a con artist


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

vacuums the house once every seven years


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Hides in the bathroom and audio records people doing their business


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

thinks that "Niagara Falls" is a movie about a tipsy woman


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks Cobras aren't dangerous


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects roadkill animals and eats them


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks a Crows can swim


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

thinks crows can't swim


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She's a alien with a bow tie


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

@The Library of Emma
Drives a motorcycle in a football helmet.

Isn't really named Emma, but her criminal history makes her want to change her name.

Buys books in braile just to challenge herself.

@The Condition of Keegan
Wore his father's slippers outside in the rain and ruined them. Blamed it on the dog.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Mold is growing out of his toes


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks he can walk on water like Jesus


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cannot never cook oatmeal right


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

dresses up cats in dresses and bonnets for tea parties


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks it's a smart idea to fly planes upside down


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has never been to an airshow.


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

can only type when the keyboard is upside down


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She ate her pillow thinking it was a marshmallow


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Steals peoples luggage


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

owns a mac


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

His computer is still running Windows XP


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Asks everyone politely if they've spoken to god this morning.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Actually dislikes people who are bald


----------



## a degree of freedom (Sep 28, 2011)

Has an avatar that looks like a user title


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants to visit the Sun one day


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Wants to visit his son one day.


----------



## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)

overcame sa and has become a successful yet arrogant business man who lives in an upscale neighborhood.


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Wants to visit the ghost of Sun Myung Moon one day.


----------



## JustThisGuy (Mar 24, 2012)

Assassinated Hitler.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ate all of the food


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Mate with all of the leprechauns in the hood.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has a box filled with Cicada sheddings under her bed.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Listens to ancient Mesopotamian music


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Smells


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is that customer who pays only in pennies


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

This is his favourite thread


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Actually hates Trump


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Living space is covered in Hillary Clinton campaign slogan "Stronger, together," and has yard voting sign thingies covering every inch of his wall.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a crazy SJW


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

His favorite show is Dr. Phil


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was denied the part of being the school janitor in a low budget 70s movie


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Got the part for being the school janitor when everyone else was denied


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was fired for attempting to ruin Xmas


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He was suppose to write the next Star Wars film but got fired after the name Jar Jar Binks appeared in the script


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Plays chubby bunny but with clipped toenails


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He chews gum that's been on the floor


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is one of those people who says "Brb" but never comes back


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's the type of person to say "goodnight" at 3am in the morning


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Can hold his breath for more than a minute


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Showers with sunglasses, latex gloves and socks on, in pitch black.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's best friends with Jar Jar Binks


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects beach sandollars


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks pink socks look awesome on him


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Attempted to pay his groceries with monopoly money


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Attempted to rob a gun store with a baseball bat


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Still uses an old 90s cell phone


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Has Donald Trump picture hung up on his wall


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Hung his shoes on a electrical wire but can't remember how he did it


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

His favorite super hero is Aqua Man


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wore new shoes & clothing but got splashed by a truck not long after


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thinks just because Jesus can walk on water, he can walk on lava


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once accidentally cut himself with needles


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He got sick from a butterfly


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Goes through peoples lockers to steal valuables


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

His shooting skills are as bad as a Stormtrooper


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sold his NES system for $4


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thinks he's Batman


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Got beat up by a 5 year old girl


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He got robbed by a old lady


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

House got burglarized by a charity event holder


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's really Bernie Sanders


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a wax figure of himself


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Hes a fan of Kanye West


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Watches Teletubbies in the early morning


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Watches Dora the Explorer when he's alone


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is 45 years old and plays with barbies in the shower


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Hes still stuck in 2nd grade after 5 years


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Got suspended once for setting the cafeteria on fire


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Amon said:


> Got suspended once for setting the cafeteria on fire


He had 1 new notification


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

^ Was wrong,I haz 2


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Amon said:


> ^ Was wrong,I haz 2


He had 2 notifications


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

The Condition of Keegan said:


> He had 2 notifications


Now has a new notification


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Was wrong, I have 3


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ruined a symphony performance once by passing gas


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He has a spider climbing on him right now


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sung a Death metal song in Church once


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He listens to Justin Bieber when no one is around


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually an alien from another universe


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's Seven Hawkins


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is Eight Hawkins


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

waited online overnight to see star wars the force awakens, 3 weeks after it premiered


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is obsessed with Pokemon Go


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thinks he's Rambo


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once tried to quietly get rid of a mod


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

All 12,816 of his posts are in the Just For Fun section of this forum


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Is the queen of rap in real life


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is actually not the last shy. More shys are to come in this petty world.


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Is a sound wave with selective mutism


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows how to speak dolphin


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Must be really fun at parties


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lied about being shy


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Has a Facebook account with 1000+ friends.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Carried somebody's casket at a funeral when he accidentally dropped it


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Is scared of mice.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Only has $1 in his bank account


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Is the best summoner inside Illuminati


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows the truth behind the Bermuda Triangle


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Has a global domination plan using hyper evolved cows


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Enjoys the sound of nails on chalkboard


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

collects used dentures


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Her job is to clean up dust from the store


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

tried kissing a frog once in hopes that it'll transform into a prince charming...nope, didn't happen.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Wears a tight, revealing tank top and runs thru the most dangerous hoods.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

wants only sons if he has kids in the future.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Her favourite book is Hungry Caterpillar.

Just for your fyi, I want 2 daughters and 1 son, tyvm. Boys are gross; I know from experience. >


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Secretly wants an alien baby


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Who doesn't!

But you, my friend, have an alien baby that you aren't telling anyone aboot, eh.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Asked a girl out on a date but never shows up to the date


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Damn @Baldy Nohairs. Be a gentleman bruh. :/
@Amon this one likes to ask girls out on a date just so that he can get free meals


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Goes through children's cubbies & eats their lunches


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Speaks fluent arabic even though he was born and raised in iceland.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Believes showering is a sin


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Plans on shaving his head so that he can be bald like baldy above.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a jinx! 
Also,I've already done that before


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Liked to kiss wihout brushing his teeth:/


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Is lusted after by the entire neighborhood.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Landed a job as a Cart pusher


----------



## TheLastShy (Sep 20, 2014)

Owns 4 PlayStation 4


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes playing hot potato with a heavy diaper


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Is in the Estonian mafia.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Just woke up after sleeping for 5 years


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Just puked and soaked up in vomit after sipping 5 beers.


----------



## Cashel (Oct 29, 2013)

Is planning on killing god for what he wrought upon her kind.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sleeps outside of peoples houses


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Holds the Guinness record for world's largest scrotum.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He tells everyone he's Superman


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

He makes a lot of promises to guys, knowing that he can't keep it.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Alostgirl said:


> He makes a lot of promises to guys, knowing that he can't keep it.


Actually has a penis. :O


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Actually has sugar walls


----------



## Taplow (Apr 18, 2014)

wears shoes made of hollowed out ducks.


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Wears tap shoes.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Locks his door on Halloween and plays loud music to scare children.


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

tried to capture a bat for a pet as a kid


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Still uses VHS tapes


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

his bathroom has been declared a hazardous waste zone.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Looks like Mr. Bean


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Acts like he doesn't know who Justin Bieber is whenever his name is brought up. "What?!? Who's Justin Bieber?! I've never heard of him... Who is he, Justin Bieber, I've never heard of him!" 
@Alostgirl Uh oh, what did I say?


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

SoundsOfSilence said:


> Still uses VHS tapes


sometimes :laugh:


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She knows how to use a bow and arrow with her feet


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

moonlights as a hitman


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She thinks once an escalator is broken, she's stuck there when really she can walk up the rest of it


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Eats cheetos for breakfast, lunch and dinner.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Enjoys a cheeky nandos


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks it's a smart idea to swim next to a waterfall


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Still uses a nightlight


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Still wets the bed.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is afraid of spiders


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Attempted to fist fight The Rock


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Challenged Stephen Curry to a game of 1 - on - 1 and lost 0-21


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Couldn't be the first level in Super Mario Bros


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Challenged the worlds weakest man to a game of arm wrestling. Lost.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Doesn't know I actually won the arm wrestle.




With my penis.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Attempted to sneak out of the house but tripped on a coffee table and was caught instantly


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Stole his father's car and went on an evening joyride with his girlfriend. Got caught speeding.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Went to pick up ice cream off the ground only to realize it was bird poop


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Gets very self conscious around blind and deaf people.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Got a letter in the mail saying he won the lottery, drove 20 miles to an abandoned town where they claimed they'd give him his prize... only to find it was a scam. Got his wallet stolen, too.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks Star Trek and Star Wars are in the same universe


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Thinks CS:GO is the sequel game to Call of Duty


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks Dark Souls is an easy game and Call of Duty is too hard


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Thinks I know what Dark Souls is, when in reality, I stopped playing video games half a year ago. :laugh:


----------



## Mattsy94 (Feb 11, 2013)

Might not be a male.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thinks he's in his house but if he looks outside his window right now...it'll be...somewhere beyond his imagination lol


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

@Mattsy94
Might actually be a female
@The Condition of Keegan
Doesn't wear a mask


----------



## Mattsy94 (Feb 11, 2013)

Might be Elvis.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Might be Bob Dylan


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thinks Ant Man is real


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Owns a new Lamborghini and likes to drive it in the hollywood hills


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Hes here in his garage


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

He locked himself in his own garage


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She locked herself inside a car


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

He locked himself in a bicycle. Somehow.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She somehow got locked up in a sock...must be a huge sick to fit a human body...oh...garage bags


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

locks his friend in garbage bags 0_0


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She tripped over a tiny rock trying to sneak out of the house


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Plants tiny rocks around people houses for them to trip on


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

The Library of Emma said:


> Plants tiny rocks around people houses for them to trip on


She had 1 New Notification


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Got lost in a subway station once


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks that Pokémon Go was a type of exercise machine


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Got lost in a subway station twice


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She got lost in her car


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

He put on a big hat and thought he was blind for a week


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She broke her nail and ended up calling 911


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

He got a splinter in his foot and asked the doctors to amputate


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks Donald Trump will be the best president ever


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Thinks Donald Trump will make America great again


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

is actually a member of secret service


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks Kanye West will actually run for president in 2020


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Thinks Robin Williams was the greatest president ever


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She doesn't now she's the first female president, I didn't even know until now


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Doesn't know he put his helmet on backwards


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Wants to run for president


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Says "it's okay" after they play the game "Sorry!"


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Wants to be James Bond and practices driving recklessly


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She actually hates books but really loves the smell of a new one


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

he has mad ninja skills


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

@*The Condition of Keegan* 
He trolls on video game servers

@*The Library of Emma* 
She trolls with him


----------



## springbreeze1 (Aug 4, 2016)

Doesn't really know about the son "Sounds of Silence."


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

@SoundsOfSilence

is actually a troll and lives under a bridge with his computer


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She thinks just because Jesus can walk on water, she can walk on acid


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

@The Condition of Keegan

forgot what gender i am and then fixed his post so no one would know


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She's a Potato...with tiny black feet


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

@The Condition of Keegan is obsessed with potatoes. But you didn't hear this from me.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

@The Library of Emma She's obsessed with books..but you never heard this from me


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Is actually a potato head under that helmet


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She is a tomato under her....hmm...book that's on her head...


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Doesn't know that the supreme court voted on labeling tomatoes a vegetable instead of fruit.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Doesn't realize that beacon Potatos is where it's at...hmm...Idk if that exists....hmm...*poof*


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Thinks bacon is a health food.


----------



## xxDark Horse (May 13, 2015)

Emma, your friend texted me the other day and said that when you really like a boy, you get this uncontrollable urge to start singing Justin Bieber songs in the shower so loud that even your neighbors can hear it.


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Hates teenagers


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

gets off his own lawn


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Bandwagon Golden State fan


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thinks John Cena made the first iPhone


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Bandwagon Golden State fan.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Hates mints who are capable of swimming.


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Listens to sensual slow r&b jams in the workplace. And enjoys it. Freak!


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Believes that placing your elbows on the table during dinner is a faux-pas.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Lies about her age so she can date older(50s+) men.


----------



## xxDark Horse (May 13, 2015)

I saw Karsten's channel on Pornhub the other day, he makes great amateur videos. His best was definitely Yoda and Chewbacca tag teaming princess Leia.


----------



## derpresion (May 17, 2012)

meepie wants to become the bacon so bad


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Vomits all over the sidewalk to further maximize his personal space.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Broke his TV after Golden State lost Game 7.


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

We told him he was the chosen one just out of pity.


----------



## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

Wears a hat made of newspaper.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Secretly eats the grease off pans


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Eats uncooked spaghetti by the box. You didn't hear it here, folks. Sick ****...


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cleans the sewers using his tongue


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

representing in the Olympics in the pudding eating competition


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes pushing the elderly into the lake


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He really hates Tacos


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is afraid of bugs


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes bathing in cement


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

All of their posts are in the "Just For Fun" section of the forum


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once went into a dark cave,but never came out


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's 3-CPO


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Claims that Captain Kirk is the brother of Dark Vader


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks Han Solo is a Jedi


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Thought Luke and Leia actually had chances at a relationship


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks Jaba The Hutt and Jar Jar Binks had a baby named Yoda


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Whacks moles with a hammer


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Stalks their crush at amusement park rides


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Canadian


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Japanese


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Haitian


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Reptilian


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Lives in Durantville


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is banished from Durantville


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Is banished from Curryville


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is the reason why Curryville civilization fell


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Sent @Alostgirl 7*69* nudes on Snapchat


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Sent a girl 70 nudes of Shaquille O'Neal


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

WTF  :wtf

Sent @Kevin001 Durant nudes


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Escaped from prison,only to be caught 10 minutes later


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Used to be a famous actor in Follywood.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

:wtf

Is a famous Bollywood actress


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Stole an ancient archaeological artifact


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Stole my heart







 :heart


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

uke

Likes to hold pinkies with @Amon.


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

^^ Kissed a toad and it turned into a prince. 
@StephCurry Kyrie Irving once broke his ankles. :grin2:


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Supports a team that hasn't been relevant since Olajuwon.


----------



## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

*since Ming excuse you


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is learning hindi to become the next bollywood heartthrob.


----------



## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

is actually fluent in spanish, tamil, hindi, english, and chinese


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Wants to migrate to London


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Used to have 9 lives


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

talk to girls in random arabic words to pick them up.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cheated in the marathon race more than once


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Jams to pattie labelle songs.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes hearing the sizzling noise when water touches a hot surface


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

had tofu for dinner.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has gotten many users banned


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Is banned from the internet and must publish papers written in code just to say "haha"


----------



## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

Is a train driver


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

has 2 kids out of wedlock


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Watches 3 guys 1 hammer video over and over


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

obsessed with 2 girls 1 cup...

(that vid is nasty af, ew. never had the courage to watch it and never will. uke:no)


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

The "Life Alert" commercial is by far her favourite commercial.


----------



## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

Eats soup with his hands


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has an extra toe


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Puts deodorant on his head


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Goes door to door selling cocaine


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

gets drunk on watermelon juice.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has the slowest pc in the world


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to suck on strawberries.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Kept saying "***********" while ordering Chinese food


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

'Likes' Mark Zuckerberg on FB.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Gets startled very easily


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

hooked up with a girl once...only to find that she was actually born a guy.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Can speak to animals. Uses her ability to bully zoo animals who are trapped in a cage.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is secretly a mon inside.


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

She is Zhang


----------



## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

Doesn't know how to make tea - has to Google the steps every time


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Falls down the stairs at least once a day.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Does crack


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

Does LeBron


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

plans to move to New Zealand to join a cult.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

:twak is a pimp


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

has a habit of stroking his tip a lil too much.


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

I have been told she is a pimp

@Alostgirl No, its not a rumour, and its not a "cult" just a very "structured way to do things for maximum performance"


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Plans on converting to Judaism soon. Have fun in NZ.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Has a crush on someone from SAS.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Plans to name his future kid as Stephen.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Hates pizza and chocolate :no


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Hates it when someone says the word trolley.


----------



## JohnB (Oct 14, 2015)

Is my secret girlfriend.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is an alien


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to make coffee with toilet water and serve it to guests uke


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes to watch 2 Girls & 1 Cup while eating chocolate ice cream


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

ew uke

Likes to hookup the unprotected way


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

does yoga in the shower


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Spanks himself for being bad.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Believes punishment by cactus should be brought back


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Asks people what type of underwear they wear, for absolutely no reason at all.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually an undercover agent


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Leaves the nuts hanging out.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Did not get the janitor job


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Sucks the tip of mushrooms for a living.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Licks the cream off mushroom tips


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Likes to ban people in public.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes to ban people privately


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Thinks about fruits in his wildest dreams.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Stills lives like it's the 1400s


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Fills a baby stroller with library books and steals them 0_0


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to coo at babies.


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Fills a baby stroller with _babies_ and steals them


----------



## kesker (Mar 29, 2011)

in 2015, acquired a serum for growing facial hair and spiked a nun's coffee with it.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Located the Lost Arc but then lost it again


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is the reason why world war III began.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has not slept for 24 hours


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's a vampire


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is from Over There land


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He's from Somewhere Land


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once rolled a fat person into the lake and used them as a flotation device


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thinks the Cabin in the Woods was based off a real event


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

likes to munch on froglegs for breakfast. So i've heard.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She thinks she can fly cause of Red Bull


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows how to survive underwater but won't tell anyone how he does it


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He knows how to not get burned alive while walking through lava, but he won't tell anyone


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Comes from a kingdom far far away..


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He comes from a galaxy far far away...


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is best buds with Jabba the Hutt


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

His brother is Jar Jar Binks


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

He _is_ Jar Jar Binks, under his mask


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She thinks Star Wars and Halo are connected in the same universe


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thinks Halo CE sucks


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks Halo 5 had the best story in the series


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Halo CE 4ever!

Doesn't eat the lettuce in a chicken salad..just eats the chicken


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He was the guy who took the cookie...the rare...double chocolate chip cookie


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is the person who switches choco chip with raisins


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He hates chocolate and peanut butter tegthor


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Gained 100 pounds in 5 months


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thought Godzilla was real


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has slipped on a banana peel more than once


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

has danced for the queen before.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Dips her coffee flavored doughnut into her coffee


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is actually a guy


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once helped a chicken cross the road & into a boiling pot of water


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

stays awake at night and sleeps during the day.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Stays wake during the day & sleeps at night


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

likes to copy lost people.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Enjoys rolling down the hill inside a trash can


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has 5 independent phone lines for each room of his apartment.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

has a crush on mint shady.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Uses her feminine charms to manipulate older men into buying jewelry for her.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

fell for my feminine charm and bought my diamonds.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Knows a lot of guys who look like me apparently.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

has a fetish for shady girls.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is deliberately shady to attract guys who have a fetish for shady girls.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Uses unsalted butter as conditioner for his hair.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

wears only wolf pelt


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Brought a real life jellyfish to a Spongebob themed children's party


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Their house is haunted by ghosts


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually a rock


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Once hacked a t.v station to broadcast his family cat videos


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thinks the moon is made out of cheese


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Works for a freak show in the Netherlands


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once climbed a cliff without any gear or protection


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

A money saver


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Despite being on reality TV, still cannot get any bookings


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Only a month away from achieving enlightenment


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is actually a clown working for the FBI


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes sleeping in the bin filled with toilet paper


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Owns a garden of man-heading, carnivorous plants. Likes to pet them, too.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a hidden portal that leads to someplace in his basement


----------



## herk (Dec 10, 2012)

possesses a satanic bible which he wrote himself a millenia ago


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thought life was like GTA until..


----------



## BCB9614 (Aug 8, 2016)

Thought he could play Rocket League in real life until...


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a collection of flies in his room


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Took him 4 hours to edit a 30 second video


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Took him 0.34 seconds to lick the cream off a mushroom tip.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

His only hobby is making rumors about other people.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

He knows too much...


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

@SoundsOfSilence He's not really a awkward rock, he's a awkward leaf

Has a hidden golden basketball


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

His actual hobby is ringing doorbells and running


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a hoarder


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sprayed something that had a powerful odor inside a room full of asthmatics


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Is uber rich. Owns a fully solar powered LEED Platinum certified home, owns 7 drives electric vehicles that he parks outside on his driveway for the public to see, has a highly advanced rainwater catchment system, and has a half acre vegetable garden because of a strict vegetarian diet when eating at home, and a chairman of an Animal Rights group. But also has a 5 acre lawn, giant swimming pool, consumes mostly meat because of rarely eating at home, never drives any of the electric vehicles but instead only drives a H1 Hummer and a V10 muscle car thatare parked inside the garage, installed solar panels are not even plugged into a battery thus never stores any power. The water from rainwater catchment system is only use to do daily flushes of its granite and limestone driveway to keep it sparkly shiny. His wife is also founder of the Animal Rights group that he chairs, but she has a reputation as a world class supermodel in wearing animal skin/fur outfits. All of their interior furniture are made from an almost extinct species of rare Redwood Tree species and skins of almost extinct animal species. 

Recently voted by Forbes as the #1 Greenest power couple in the world.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Worked overtime but forgot to log in his hours


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Eats 10 eggs a day.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a vampire when she's alone


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Has a girlfriend from Afghanistan.


----------



## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

She is not really lost.


----------



## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

He's a schizophrenic and a big liar.


----------



## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

That is not true, I'm not a liar. But the guy above me really is a schizophrenic.


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

cake eater


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Smokes poison ivy


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

has broken @Amon's heart before.


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

Trinity was his cover up, he loved Morpheus actually.


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Is actually Carlos Mencia in secret who practices and tests out his material on here.


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

Buys underwear on the flea market.


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Thinks the flea market is just an underground flea fighting ring.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Lives in the Mariana Trench.


----------



## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

Main source of income is from selling his soiled underwear to several members of this site.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has accumulated credit card debt from purchasing overpriced, soiled underwear from a member of this site.


----------



## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

Is getting sued by a member of this site for selling overpriced, soiled underwear which didn't even belong to him like he claimed it did.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Is sueing the wrong person. HAHA and you thought my name was actually Ernest Wellington!

Talk about a rumor...


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

Is a sheep disguised as wolf.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

has declared bankruptcy due to owing @StephCurry two million dollars.


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

Her ultimate crush is ET


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Only dates Aliens


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Secretly a monarch of some far off distant land


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lives in a land far far away


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Was asked to play Jar Jar Binks in the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy but turned them down.


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

air kisses his poop before flushing the toilet, in his mind, their are his children.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses a cooking pan to wash his feet but never washes the pan, and puts it back.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Dresses up as a ghost and sneaks out at night to scare little children.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sneaks into peoples houses and steals their food


----------



## CWe (Mar 7, 2010)

Likes to eat his own poop ^^


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Records himself making weird noises


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Burned down his family's house with a box of matches when he was seven


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes to leave all the dirt and scraps in his neighbors yard


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Had a pet dog once, but he forgot to feed it and let it starve


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once had his neighbor ask if he could watch over their pet birds & when they returned all they found were feathers everywhere


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Eats birds raw. Feathers and all.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sleeps in a coffin


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Lives in a coffin (and survives on earthworms)


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Worships the demon and has his own cult


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

Calls his peepee "little pharaoh"


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Actually works in a circus


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Worships eels.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Once bought a Duran Duran t-shirt to impress a girl he liked. Doesn't even like the band.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants to secretly overthrow the ban queen


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Took the Queen of England out and got to home base on the first date.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually 13 years old


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Encourages fascism


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Swims when it's cold out


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Crawls to work


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

@*Neo* 
His real name is Captain Nemo and he commands a submarine called the _Nautilus

_@Amon
Is actually a pok*emon*


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He thinks in Hogwarts once he picks up a stick


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Kidnapped a baby sheep from a local farm to use as a pillow. When the sheep grew big, it got upgraded into a sofa.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Fell off a cliff playing Pokemon Go. 

Just another reason why I stay away from that horrid game :laugh:


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He plays with Barbie Dolls


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

He owned a teddy bear he called "Cuddlecakes" and took it everywhere he went. One time he let go of it on a roller coaster and it landed in a garbage dump. He never saw Cuddlecakes again...


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Walked into a police station looking for a soda. Was arrested after he threw a fit when he learned they didn't sell Coca-Cola.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Takes showers in the dark


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Has been eating nothing but McDonalds nuggets for his entire life

(I still don't know if you're a boy or girl btw lol)


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Swims with whales


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Swims with Stephen Curry


----------



## The Starry night (May 23, 2015)

Asked me on a second date :/


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Tried to walk across Death Valley with only one bottle of water.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is that person who urinates all over the place in public bathrooms


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Drinks from public swimming pools. Daily.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Built his own home out of dirt and clay


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

The longest book they ever read was 2 pages


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once told an Asian person to "Stop squinting & get glasses"


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Was actually pretty popular in high school


----------



## The Starry night (May 23, 2015)

Doesnt have teeth


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has visited the dark web


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

@*The Starry night* 
Has a crush on Clint Eastwood.

@*Amon* 
Is actually transgender


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a slave in an ancient civilization in some universe


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is an alien.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Is actually a 50 year old bald man.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Plays with her stuffed toys in the dark


----------



## herk (Dec 10, 2012)

comes from the mirror realm


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Twerks when he's alone


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was on the TV show Strange Addictions


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

doesn't even know what mr. means


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns an invisibility cloak but can't remember where he left it


----------



## noydb (Jun 29, 2016)

Has had butt implants.


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Is the current Guinness World Record holder for the longest time danced non-stop together with a hamster, chinchilla, ferret and a guinea pig at 30 seconds.


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

is from china.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is from China


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Failed Boating School multiple times


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is suffering from an identity crisis


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants to be on reality TV


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He opens the door, gets on the floor, he does the dinosaur


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

His love for Keegan is unconditional


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once made a moderator disappear


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a wax dummy of himself


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Serves as a monument to something mysterious


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Hands out detention slips for no reason


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Runs a monastery somewhere in the Himalayas


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses Dark Magic


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Neo said:


> Once ate a cactus and thought afterwards, 'what was the point'.


once went on the bus.

what a wanker.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Got lost on a roundabout for 3 hours once. Sold his car and only uses public transit now.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Thinks I have/had a license


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once put lead inside cafeteria lunches


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

once put mushroom tips inside cafeteria lunches


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Once brought a mushroom tip inside the woman's locker room in school.


----------



## StephCurry (Jan 11, 2016)

Obsessed with mushroom tips


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Had his leg amputated


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a Neo-Nazi from the neolithic era


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Detests Hawaiian food


----------



## The Starry night (May 23, 2015)

Had a fight a min ago and now is licking the walls :/


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Made a bomb & got invited to the White House as a result


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

got slapped by a girl once for.....


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once tackled a person in a wheelchair for not dancing


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cross dresses when he's alone


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Jumped into a pool & a tsunami wiped out multiples cities as a result


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes to play pranks on the elderly


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Snuck a goldfish into the water dispenser at work to terrorize a co-worker with ichthyophobia


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Has a secret library in her house, the biggest library known to man.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Isn't actually Gothic


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

A monodrama fanatic


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a collection of used diapers


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Their secret hobby is gardening carnivorous plants


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Purchased many Plug It In scents so he wouldn't need to shower


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Uses a flip phone
@Neo haha good one lol


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses a skeleton head to play soccer


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Hasn't showered in 12 years


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Room is filled with cockroaches


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

@SoundsOfSilence

Isn't actually an insomniac, but instead moonlights as a deranged catburglar who only steals alarm clocks. Nobody knows why...


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

@Amon keeps tanks of tarantulas at the foot of his bed to ward off cockroaches


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Keeps a jar of cicadas by her bed to help her fall asleep.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes sleeping in cemeteries


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

A mongoose on the loose


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sold the 1st ever Mac computer for $15


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Watches ISIS videos


----------



## The Library of Emma (Mar 3, 2016)

Dresses up as a cop and arrests random people on the highway for fun


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She's a CIA agent


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Did the Robot dance in a dress,but little did he know that there were cameras


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Locked a seal inside his closet but completely forgot about it after 10 minutes


----------



## brandini734 (Jan 15, 2012)

Likes to eat popcorn with ketchup


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Would like to be a ninja turtle when all grown up


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Likes to cosplay as Moaning Myrtle in a Harry Potter dress up.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes flushing things down the toilet


----------



## sajs (Jan 3, 2015)

Doesn't know his own address, so he has a necklace with a tag with the info.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Pretends to have a broken leg so he can have people do things for him


----------



## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

Sleeps in a cardboard box and has foam as a pillow.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sleeps in a tent made out of foam and uses a cardboard box as a pillow


----------



## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

Brushes their teeth with a fork.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Closes down children's lemonade stands


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Rehashes old rumours.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sells Neosporin downtown


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

A monk in pursuit of inner peace


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Fell off a bike once right in front of his crush.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Wrote a nasty letter to Paul Simon while he was under the influence of influenza.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Tried going down Niagara Falls in a barrel. Failed. :frown2:


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Attempted to make cereal but burned down the house as a result


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

When he's happy, people think he's frowning. (I'm going to continue to ASSUME you're a boy until you tell me otherwise!)


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Had his first sexual experience while watching 'Marathon Man'.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is dating Mrs. Robinson


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was pushing his friend in a shopping cart until he pushed him off a cliff


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Is actually suffering from an identity crisis


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually half robot,half alien


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Had to repeat 1st grade 4 times


----------



## springbreeze1 (Aug 4, 2016)

Got arrested for cloning self 1 more time than law allows (which is 7 btw).


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Is actually a cool winter freeze


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants robots to replace the human race


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Has a monopoly on the posting industry


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Flowers die every time he walks passed them


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

spreads rumors about other sasers


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a dark cloud over his head o.o


----------



## springbreeze1 (Aug 4, 2016)

Is the dark cloud.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

works as a room deodorizer


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Works at McDonalds. Permanently.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Took him 4 years to fold his laundry


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

Lives inside his room with his computer and survives on rats and tap water from his bathroom faucet.

And for the last time, are you a BOY or GIRL? Speak, creature, or I shall call you Dreyfuss!


----------



## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

He is actually a rock.


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

He is actually a cat


----------



## springbreeze1 (Aug 4, 2016)

abuses cats.


----------



## Pongowaffle (Jul 23, 2015)

Was once anally claw raped by his own cat.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has foot fungus fetish


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes placing a bunch of tanbark at the end of the playground slide


----------



## springbreeze1 (Aug 4, 2016)

Falls in love with self in mirror.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Got fired from his daycare job for trying to teach children how to cook meth


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Eats grass off the ground


----------



## SoundsOfSilence (Mar 17, 2016)

He's a boy and his name is Dreyfuss.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes tickling his feet with needles


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was stranded at sea until he found land,then was stranded on an island


----------



## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

keeps asking strangers if they saw The Matrix


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is constantly tired


----------



## Baldy Nohairs (Jun 20, 2015)

Is 3'8" tall


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Bathes in animal blood


----------



## AFoundLady (Feb 8, 2013)

Steals girls' used tampons.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Failed Pre-Algebra 2 times


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

tries to pick up women by telling them he's the one and offering them various colors of pills


----------



## darlieq (Dec 30, 2014)

Mugged me last night.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She thinks I'm a potato


----------



## Overdrive (Sep 19, 2015)

He hides bodies in his cave


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Thinks i have a cave.


----------



## An HP Laptop (Sep 16, 2016)

Is secretly a paraplegic.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Posts in old threads


----------



## hbk4894 (Sep 2, 2014)

Drinks at 07.00


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

^Digs up old threads


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

hates archaeology forums


----------



## meepie (Jun 20, 2010)

current holder of a VIP nude beach resort pass


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Sprinkles scabs on salads.


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

@meepie She makes some great pies, but refuses to share any, screeching "they're only for mee!" at anyone who tries to snatch a bite of them.

@Mc Borg Never afraid to cut in line. :bah


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has connections from the dark side


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is a double agent from the dark side


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Eats raisins in the dark side


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Eats sunflower seeds with the dark lord


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Only appears after midnight


----------



## meepie (Jun 20, 2010)

Has a stone face


----------



## KILOBRAVO (Sep 17, 2011)

Has a scissors face


----------



## Humesday (Mar 6, 2016)

Has moss on his back


----------



## meepie (Jun 20, 2010)

likes rabbits way too much, childhood crush was the trix rabbit


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a pie made after herself,how selfish


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Has an UltraShy shrine made of whips and paddles. 

@[email protected]


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Digs up whole skeletons and uses them as models for his anatomy class


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Farts in mason jars and collects them.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Tried to jump over buildings but failed


----------



## waterfairy (Oct 20, 2016)

Plays with vampire bats.


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

She isn't actually a waterfairy.


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

He knows who shot Biggie.


----------



## db09striker (Jan 28, 2016)

She is the milf from American Pie and likes milking cats.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

worried his childbearing years are passing him by.


----------



## SomeTosser (Oct 30, 2016)

Has friends.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects animal bones


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Wears baby socks.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a spirit hunter


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Auditioned for One Direction after Zayne left the group


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once gave a homeless person a wallet full of monopoly money


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Sneaks into hospitals and swaps out all the newborns with cucumbers.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Is the proud mother of several cucumbers.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Broke the invisible cloak


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Uses strangers hair strands as floss.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Likes the feeling of cactus needles against her thighs.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes to scrape needles against his skin


----------



## Quanny94 (Oct 31, 2016)

Likes wet willies with cucumbers


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Likes wet willies with willies.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sells ocean water to his customers


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Knows Victoria's secret.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lives in a Murder House


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

A monetary policymaker


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sleeps in the ocean


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Smokes catnip blunts.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Secretly puts arsenic into peoples drinks


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Gives free hugs at the playground


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lives by herself on a remote island


----------



## Dreaming1111 (Aug 31, 2016)

Collects lint balls from clothing


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Thinks she can speak to squirrels


----------



## herk (Dec 10, 2012)

bathes in caviar


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

works as a lingerie mannequin


----------



## Orb (Nov 5, 2012)

Ate the world's largest ball of twine.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has won more acting awards than Keanu


----------



## meepie (Jun 20, 2010)

performed jb's single 'baby' at a 3 star jazz club


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Disassembled Jimmy Neutron's dog. :bah


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Made out with the Jimmy Neutron's teacher in a shed.


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

She is bisexual.


----------



## MrQuiet76 (Aug 26, 2011)

He squeezes his tube of toothpaste in the middle.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Trump's alter ego


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

His favorite game on SAF was the one where you fed babies to alligators.


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

A rapper who raps about star trek themed subjects.


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

@Blue Dino That's not a rumor, that's a fact (well, sort of)! That's actually exactly how my screen name came about. xD I wrote a rap about Star Trek related stuff ages ago, in which I called myself emcee borg.

She's _not_ actually a dinosaur.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

He hasn't lived all his life in Fayetteville


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

He hates Joe and curses his name every night before bed.


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Likes to go muddin.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has his own private island


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Is an alt of Toad Licker.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects salt water


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Has a copious amount of bath salts.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Forces infant Aliens to consume acid


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Pretends to be the tooth fairy to collect children's teeth.


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Still believes in Santa.


----------



## twistix (Sep 8, 2013)

Can't live without pickled pineapples


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Doesn't know basic math


----------



## MrQuiet76 (Aug 26, 2011)

Eats mayonnaise straight from the jar


----------



## twistix (Sep 8, 2013)

Has a pet rock called mittens


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Hangs photo copies of their butt all over the house and calls it art.


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Is really a worried dog.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a robot in disguise


----------



## twistix (Sep 8, 2013)

Is a magnificent beast on the dance floor


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Shes a mixture of a human, a potato, a frog, and turtle.


----------



## Mxx1 (Feb 3, 2015)

He still loves playing ding dong ditch.


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Doesn't believe in underwear.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lives under the sea in a pineapple


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Listens to "We Are Number One" religiously


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Donates expired pet foods to the animal shelter


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Can speak spanish.


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Only eats croutons.


----------



## Mxx1 (Feb 3, 2015)

Was rejected for a role in Jersey Shore.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

The x's in her name have meaning to it


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Types by turning his screen upside down.


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Is actually a batch of emo gluten-free oatmeal raisin cookies.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

planning on overdosing on tryptophan tomorrow and sleeping until the new year


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Draws erotic art of Mc Borg's avatar and his own avatar playing tongue hockey.


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Secretly wish she owned dogs instead of cats.


----------



## ljubo (Jul 26, 2015)

Is a reincarnate of Bob Marley.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Apartment is filled with evil spirits


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Has over 50,000 pet fish.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is an employee at Area 51


----------



## LookOutTheWindow (May 15, 2015)

Is a reptilian


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Is actually from Alaska.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Visits the deep web often


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Watches the same episode of SpongeBob every night for 10 years now.


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Has a collection of exactly 48,250 bananas, oranges, pears, strawberries and cupcakes.


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Pees in the shower and bathes in the toilet.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses sewer water to scrub her feet


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

majored in astrology in college


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

His username is based off of a private moment in his life


----------



## TheThinWhiteDuke (Nov 26, 2016)

I heard he's not a real person, but actually just a hologram


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Makes bombs in his basement


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

caught impersonating a succubus


----------



## sandromeda (Nov 28, 2016)

chews with his mouth open


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Snorkels in sewers.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes drinking chunky sewer water


----------



## Watching (Aug 7, 2015)

^ Is my alt account for **** stirring.


----------



## knightofdespair (May 20, 2014)

Is really the missing D.B. Cooper


----------



## makavelithedon (Apr 25, 2011)

Spent many years in an iron lung


----------



## sandromeda (Nov 28, 2016)

eats nothing but pickled eggs


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Drinks from the bathtub after an old person uses it


----------



## Alleviate Suffering (Jan 28, 2014)

I heard you are the evil twin of Santa Claus and that you are plotting to burn down his workshop.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Bullies alien school children


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Is an alien school child.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Skipped school once to meetup with her cult followers


----------



## blue53669 (Sep 15, 2016)

Collects the lint between strangers toes and knits them into a blanket which then wears over head


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Plays piano music in abandoned buildings


----------



## Worried Cat Milf (May 20, 2016)

Makes his guests eat off the floor


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

given her beard, she needs to sharpen that katana and get to work on those winter legs


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns property in the deep ocean


----------



## PepeSylvia (Dec 1, 2016)

Wears socks with sandals


----------



## 629753 (Apr 7, 2015)

i heard he organizes things


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a hoarder


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Still uses the Power Mac G4


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Is so environmentally conscious that he recycles his bath water to do his dishes.


----------



## spong007 (Oct 5, 2016)

he likes to buy used undies


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Digs up old threads


----------



## Mc Borg (Jan 4, 2008)

Digs up old graves


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

I heard his costume was a bush on Halloween


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a weenie


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

all his underclothes have candy canes on them


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Wears Star Wars pajamas to bed.


----------



## IcedOver (Feb 26, 2007)

Gives lumps of coal as presents for Christmas.


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Lives in a igloo.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

One leg is slightly shorter than the other.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Collects toe nail clippings :um


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Eats the toe nails collected for cletis, he's your employ.


----------



## SFC01 (Feb 10, 2016)

has a secret crush on SFC01


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

But that's truth! You are not playing fair! 
:O Is a robot.


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Is a master robot of an assembly line of slave robots.


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Is a dinosaur!


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wears underwear forwards then backwards to get better wear out of 'em


----------



## cinto (Jun 19, 2017)

Swam with a crocodile in the Amazonia for his 10th birthday


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bakes special muffins for wild birds


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Username is actually the name of an emo rock band.


----------



## Barakiel (Oct 31, 2013)

Prehistoric


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is tiny

Also idk why this thread was even dug up again?


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a hambot


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

If you speak their name 3 times inside a candle-lit room at midnight, they'll appear with a platter of cake BUT it will be in the flavor you loathe most


----------



## EarthDominator (Sep 10, 2017)

Knows how to make pizza from dirt but doesn't want to tell anyone.


----------



## CloudChaser (Nov 7, 2013)

Only drinks triple filtered bear semen.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Only buys used shoes


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Raised by goat-people


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has made bath tub moonshine


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

goes by the name Darth Garth at the Star Wars dating site


----------



## IcedOver (Feb 26, 2007)

Was the shooter on the grassy knoll.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Likes to eat paper


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is a disgruntled teacher


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

likes to hug random people and tell them that "everything's gonna be okay"


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Enjoys knitting with the old folks


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

^ Likes to smell their own armpits.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Middle name is Cletis


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eats raw eggs


----------



## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

Is a goat.

Greatest Of All Time!



And is an actual goat. So I've heard..


----------



## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

The leader of a criminal gang.


----------



## naes (Nov 1, 2013)

Takes milk baths becuz he thinks it is good for his skin.


----------



## AaronTheAnxious (Mar 24, 2017)

The bullies at his school call him "two shoes" because he wears two shoes.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once coughed up a hairball in a restaurant


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Was eaten by an angry three.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Keeps onion peels in her socks


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Excaliber said:


> ^ Keeps onion peels in her socks


Not a rumor, you gave me that recipe, it's your favorite one to scare way any elf at nigh (only works at night, for sleeping).


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

Sus y said:


> Not a rumor, you gave me that recipe, it's your favorite one to scare way any elf at nigh (only works at night, for sleeping).


Ohh, well I heard you where afraid of elves, I'm glad that *you are* enjoying the recipe! :wink2:


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thinks the moon is made outta cheese


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wipes nose on other people's coat sleeves


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Enjoys the smell of skunk as cologne


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a meep


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has 6 toes on his left foot


----------



## asittingducky (Apr 23, 2013)

^hoards garden gnomes


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Likes hugging a cactus


----------



## Overdrive (Sep 19, 2015)

stole potatoes


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Takes every stray cat he finds home.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Doesn't wear underwear


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is obsessed with bodily fluids


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a part time squirrel, mostly for parties and events


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ can speak goat fluently


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Seems to enjoy this thread a little too much


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Is really the grim reaper


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thinks Canadian Bacon is a myth


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

thinks mooses are giant mouses


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ eats nothing other than cheese


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was bitten by a clam


----------



## MCHB (Jan 1, 2013)

Put the Amarth in Amon!


----------



## camokay (Dec 10, 2017)

Is the drama llama
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a tub filled with $1 bills


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a newb


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has curlers underneath her wimple


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Combs his hair with a fork


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Owns a train.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Rides the couch


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Enjoys dandelion salad


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Still says badunkadunk


----------



## MagnoliaForest (Dec 29, 2017)

Secretly loves eating broccoli.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a tattoo of local pizza parlors in their back in case of emergencies


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Uses a pencil to pick his nose


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wears a pink crown


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Rubs butter onto his skin daily


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a weenie


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Keeps a worm as a pet


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Sleeps in a tent inside their room because they prefer it to an actual bed


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

^ dances like crazy when alone


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Sidelines as a swimsuit model


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

^ wants to sing karaoke all night but doesnt dare


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ keeps socks on his hands as gloves


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has mechanical organs in his basement


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Gets his electricity from hamsters running on a wheel


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a harem full of cats


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Fills balloons with tartar sauce


----------



## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

Hey, I do that!

Runs his car on recycled grease from McDonald's, so he always smells like french fries.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sniffs fast food for funs


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a huge collection of party hats from all the parties he's attended. His most-prized is one with a Hello Kitty on it


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Trains his cats to be his minions


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a wall filled with fidget spinner collection


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Glues tiny mustaches on cats on Wednesdays


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Teaches a class on how to speak 'cat'


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Was lost at sea for 20 years.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Seasons the sea salt


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Eats mashed potatoes with a fork


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects snails


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Took a bean but didn't leave a bean


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Stole a lean bean


----------



## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

Has found a way to suspend a toilet seat halfway so it's neither up nor down - successfully annoying both genders equally.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Rinses up and then soaps off


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ puts mustard on his pancakes instead of syrup.


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Plays Hungry Hungry Hippos daily.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Doesn't like green tea


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Licks the salt n pepper shakers at restaurants


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ enjoys picking lice out of peoples hair

**Edit**

Posted before me


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Only eats the green ones


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Loves when his string is pulled.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Eats onions raw, skin and all


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Keeps up with the Cardigans


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Touched all the dinks


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has a really long urethra.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once actually used the cardboard roll out of desperation


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a certificate to preform ant CPR


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Can grow a tail (and horns).


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ate all the cereal


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Peed outside on Christmas day


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Named his cat "Loaf"


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a folder on his hard drive titled "catloaf"


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Sneezes on door nobs


----------



## MrQuiet76 (Aug 26, 2011)

^^ just won the lottery


----------



## camokay (Dec 10, 2017)

Stole a handkerchief and named it Booger king


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

once bought a camouflage dress but couldn't find where she put it


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

has x-ray vision, finds it difficult not to walk into walls


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a lead block under her bed


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Hides several garlic bulbs under his cap when going out to fend off vampires


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Dropped the lava lamp in an active volcano


----------



## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

Hates everyone on SAS. Neither admits nor hides it.


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Has ants in their pants.


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Is really 33


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wore it out the day he bought it


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Puts holes in their socks.


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Secretly likes the user above her


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Secretly likes me because they like old ladies....

>


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a secret basement overflowing with torture devices


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Doesn't have a nose.


----------



## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

greentea33 said:


> Doesn't have a nose.


Actually prefers coffee, regrets username on a daily basis.


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Sleeps with a beach ball they painted a face on.


----------



## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Totally teaist.

Discriminates against brown teas, black teas, white teas, and tea trees.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

to reach his post count, he must have had to post about a 100 posts a minute since the early 60s....it's mind boggling!


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has extremely poor mathematical skills.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ wears a wig he made from the fur he brushed off his cat


----------



## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

Spent almost an entire day looking for Narnia in a furniture shop... the police were called.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Named his rabbit Bun Bun


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Checks out his grille in the rear view before entering the cloob


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Makes snowballs and then eats them.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Likes to lick their own toes


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Sniffs paint fumes.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Belts out a tune about belts


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cuts grass with scissors


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is already planning Easter egg colorings


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ chews off his toe nails and eats them


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Is a goat whisperer


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Paints goatee's on meloons


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Goes dumpster diving daily


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Eats crayons


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Catches house flies and keeps them as pets


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a weeaboo


----------



## Ms kim (May 15, 2017)

Went to Disney world and got lost there. Has not been seen since.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Made Mr. Kim vanish


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Likes to sing & dance in the rain when they think nobody's watching


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Puts gum on chairs before ppl sit on em


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Amon said:


> Puts gum on chairs before ppl sit on em


:O OMG how did you know??

Can read people's minds through the internet.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Makes faces at cloons


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sleeps 1 hr every night


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke bad so much he's back to good again


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Watches Breaking Good


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke wind at the wind festival


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

thinks The Walking Dead is a documentary on caffeine shortages


----------



## naes (Nov 1, 2013)

writes his number on bathroom stalls


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Floats into the room, says "beans", floats back out


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is actually a goat-man


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Painted graffiti that said "goatman 09" on the town water tower. Still there .


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has around twelve thousand silverfish living inside his sock drawer.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is a diehard Frank Sinatra fan, believes he's his illegitimate son


----------



## naes (Nov 1, 2013)

Collects used pieces of gum that she finds :grin2:


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Middle name is Naes


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has an entire gallery made from discarded articles of his crush


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

His rival poster is 888


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Refuses to quit with the Christmas music


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Set up Halloween props yesterday


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Counts all the sesame seeds on his hamburger bun before eating


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Donates to the ant fund


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Only makes payments with pennies.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Got into an altercation with a blobfish


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Is scared of getting injured so keeps himself wrapped in bubble wrap.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Wears sunglasses at night.


----------



## MrQuiet76 (Aug 26, 2011)

^^squeezes his tube of toothpaste in the middle instead of at the end


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Buys bird seed to enjoy as trail mix


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Likes to set forest fires


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

amazes people with her shadow puppetry and yodeling


----------



## camokay (Dec 10, 2017)

Likes to sing Backstreet Boys songs


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Likes to reenact The Blair Witch Project every time she's in the woods


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Always skips the eighth step in a staircase.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

went to school to study the dynamics of paint drying


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sniffs vinegar at the store but never buys none


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

shoots a gun into the air and yells at people to get off his lawn


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Loves moon bathing once a month


----------



## clarkekent (Dec 2, 2015)

Tied me up and had her way with me.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Baked a cake the flavor of pipe tobacca


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Is a distant relative to Douglas MacArthur.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Bathes in milk in its purest every weekend to preserve his youthful beauty


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes to feel it before they buy it


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Gets ninja'd often


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Actually enjoys Rihanna music... Very much


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

likes to watch people bathe


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Puts dot stickers on everything they think they could have been in a past life


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is involved in animal husbandry- trying to find husbands for his goats on oklivestock and tinder


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Doesn't actually enjoy driving for pleasure


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

hides an orchestra under his bed


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is hosting a loaf party


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Loves meatloaves


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Sleeps upside down in a barn.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Can't spell chihuahua


----------



## Lyyli (Dec 5, 2017)

Just learned how to spell chihuahua


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

believes being an alien allows him (her?) to go out in public without clothes


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Has tea parties with teddy bears


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

doesn't play with his toys anymore. It's like "Toy Story 4: Woody goes to rehab" in your home


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Uses dish soap when showering


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

It's annoyed by the heat. Too hot this season.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

Sus y said:


> It's annoyed by the heat. Too hot this season.


LOL your funny :crying:

Enjoys scented candles: Labeled ---> burning tires


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Excaliber is a green alien.



Excaliber said:


> LOL your funny :crying:
> 
> Enjoys scented candles: Labeled ---> burning tires


I like those ones. :wink2:


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

^ Has abnormally large nipples.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Turns into a werewolf at night


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Mugged someone for $1


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Runs over ketchup packs in the McDonald's parking lot


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Asks for grease to use as dipping sauce for his nuggets


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ordered a pizza from a stall in the McDonald's restroom


----------



## unknovvn (May 29, 2017)

Drizzles the sauce directly onto his nuggets, like a mad man


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once used the word "nuggets" in a dating profile


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

once fed a chicken some chicken nuggets


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Chews on gum that came from under restaurant tables.


----------



## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

A Toxic Butterfly said:


> once fed a chicken some chicken nuggets


My sister fed her chickens the leftover bones from a whole baked chicken once and they ate it. Supposedly it's good for them, but I couldn't do that.

Rumor: Likes blowing more than just bubbles! (I hope that isn't going too far with the rumor lol. Just remember it is a joke!)


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

solutionx said:


> My sister fed her chickens the leftover bones from a whole baked chicken once and they ate it. Supposedly it's good for them, but I couldn't do that.
> 
> Rumor: Likes blowing more than just bubbles! (I hope that isn't going too far with the rumor lol. Just remember it is a joke!)


Imagine that, chicken cannibalism is actually good for them. :lol Nah no worries.

Um, rumour. ^ Totally let his sister feed chicken to chickens because it's a secret fetish of his.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Adds salt and pepper to bathwater


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Murdered a snowman


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Hands out free breath mints down at the steakhouse


----------



## MagnoliaForest (Dec 29, 2017)

Exchange breath mints for steaks


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Loves Paul Thomas Anderson.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

writes for the greeting card industry


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Gets the tingles for Pringles


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a bean lava limp


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Is a ghost on a pirate ship.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

runs around sticking pins in her insect friends


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Stabbed a punching bag


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

pretends he doesnt like chocolate


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Eats raw fish


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

his home is infested by rabid bunny rabbits who raid his vegetable bin leaving him to subsist on a diet of cheetos and orange soda.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

Has a job at a resturant pre-chewing food for old people so they can eat.


----------



## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

Was convinced for the longest time that Skittles promoted the 'alternative lifestyle'


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

likes to count cows instead of sheeps before falling asleep


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Takes a shower once a month whether he needs it or not.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has several compromising photos of other members that would shock everyone if it ever got out


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Likes to bite every coin to make sure its not actually chocolate


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Stoled my chocolate  Give me it back to me or buy me a new one.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

Sus y said:


> Stoled my chocolate  Give me it back to me or buy me a new one.


It was to protect you, chocolate is poisonous to hamsters... :con

---> Likes to soak her socks in her tea for the flavour


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a choco thief


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Is an accomplice, ate the chocolate all by himself.


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Amon said:


> Is a choco thief


:O and I though you were the nicest person in the universe.:frown2:


Excaliber said:


> ^ Is an accomplice, ate the chocolate all by himself.


Excaliber came to my house and drank some yummy tea, also repeated because loved it. >


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

Sus y said:


> Excaliber came to my house and drank some yummy tea, also repeated because loved it. >


Lol your funny, I slightly tweaked the recipe though so its a clean sock out of the package, I wasn't too fond of the one that just came off your foot 

---> Collects ear wax to make into candles.


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Fan number one of my candies. Don't eat them, gives them as present to all their friends. 
Thank you for making me a successful business women by buying all my candies.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

She is trying to train guinea pigs to clean her house.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Is not able to throw anything away, collects every item she has ever used for its memories (Including toothbrushes, napkins, etc)


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Would not buy a used rocket ever, prefers new


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Has a goat's army, is getting ready to conquer the world.


----------



## Ms kim (May 15, 2017)

ran away from her own wedding


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Whiffs the potted plants trying to detect if they are unhappy


----------



## camokay (Dec 10, 2017)

Hoards empty pickle jars


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Combs the carpeting so that the nap makes a pattern


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Only accepts floating loafs


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is the new Dread Pirate Roberts


----------



## asittingducky (Apr 23, 2013)

Has gone through countless nose and ear hair trimmers


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Released thousands of spiders into his house to catch one annoying fly.


----------



## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

likes Nickleback unironically.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Talks to his house plants


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Dances around with the toilet brush on toilet cleaning day


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Uses rolls of toilet paper as a pillow


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Soaks his car keys in pickle juice so they get just the right smell


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Uses a lawn chair as his drivers seat in his car.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Takes bowls to the bowling alley


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

does several full circles and whimpers, before lying on a rug to take a nap


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eats beans right from the can like a champ


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Keeps extra clothes, fake IDs, passports, canned foods in their school bags for emergency escapes


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Keeps a roll of duct tape with him at all times to fix stuff he breaks.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a bacon addict


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Has a collection of rocks


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

double dips his chips


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Likes pickles covered in sour cream.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Throws peanuts onto her neighbors yard to keep the squirrels there.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a collection of roxs


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Enjoys 'gummy' worms


----------



## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

Doesn't really have a big sword like he claims.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Goes around putting pine cones in car exhaust pipes.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

exhales on cold windows, does the kissy face imprint, but leaves it smeared for someone else to clean later


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Was carried away by tsetse flies the size of eagles once


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Baked a mono


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wore out his noodle


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is only into nu metal bands for show; actually into country pop very much


----------



## Deaf Mute (Jun 12, 2017)

Is hiding the most radiant smile underneath those jaded eyes


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Collects doll clothes but not dollz


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Heavily invests in AI and robotics so he could finally be freed from house chores soon


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Likes burnt popcorn.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a tea addict


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Had a happy meal for breakfast


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has a sticker on his vehicle that says, "honk if you're horny"


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Goes to the park looking for frogs to kiss


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Peels grapes before eating


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Sneezes on his hands and then greets people with a handshake.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has committed lots of rai"sins"


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Commutes to work on his lawn mower


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks 'Bitcoin' is microscopic currency


----------



## Ms kim (May 15, 2017)

Grained 20 pounds from Christmas food


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Will post again in 5 minutes


----------



## Ms kim (May 15, 2017)

Got lost on his way to the post office


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

could be a Kardashian


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Steals napkins


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lives in East Korea


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Uses too much damn laundry detergent! **** don't flow out of trees like sap, ya know!


----------



## asittingducky (Apr 23, 2013)

Throws a tantrum if the crust is left on his sandwiches.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Stole Kevin's Uncrustable snack


----------



## Rhythmbat (Jan 6, 2018)

I heard that he likes to smell recently used socks


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes to eat bean burritos in bed


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Makes sausage from goat meat. :bah


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Drinks too much gin and juice in that cup.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

really wanted to be greentea32 but it was taken


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Could go for some electrolytes right about now


----------



## Overdrive (Sep 19, 2015)

He's gonna give me his 106


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Still watches the movie Juno a few times a year on DVD


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Wears a tiara and tutu


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Mixed a Google product with an Apple product and called it a Grapple


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Buys Friskies 'Party mix' (cat treats) and serves to his guests.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Mistakenly once asked for a "Fappuccino" at Starbucks


----------



## arntran (Jan 11, 2018)

Put milk before cereals


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

likes to give foot rubs to weary travelers


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Collects plastic bags


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns a wax doll of himself


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is a member of the totebag cult


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is always adventuring in tropical forests looking for ancient artifacts.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is secretly dating Tauri


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Stinks of money


----------



## Overdrive (Sep 19, 2015)

He's a yes man


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a yass man


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Lurks in the shadows right behind you; if you have a nice _yass_, he will find you


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

treasures the little moments we share


----------



## cinto (Jun 19, 2017)

Is the superintendent at a Law firm.


----------



## Rhythmbat (Jan 6, 2018)

she was in jail once for stealing all the cookies... All of them.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a weenie


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a beenie


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a bean bag chair


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bathes with a cactus


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

nurses abandoned and unappreciated vegetables back to health, then eats them.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Broke a pink piggy bank


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Flaked on his "how to stop flaking" meeting


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

puts dandruff shampoo on his corn flakes


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays an arpeggio to announce his entrance into the bedroom


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Is the ice cream man.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

recently released a compilation of her greatest hits


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays the cheese grater


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Is richer than Bill Gates


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Overcooked the goatmeal


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

It is said that if he starts singing in the rain, everything around him becomes grayscale


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wears a fake beek in his car during lunchtime at work


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

founder of the facebook group "Single dads of goats"


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Got my goat drunk and took it clubbin


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is an overly strict goat parent, which is why his goats are forced to rebel and party hard.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

She has no ideas the pressures of raising a goat in this day and age with drugs and social media everywhere


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sleeps with a stuffed animal


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has plans to overthrow one of them Moderators to become one himself, as if the world isn't already brimming with them


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is the first person in his family to attend clown and mime school


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Shot the tooth fairy dead.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Spreads rumors about her teacher


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Thinks Applebee's is fine dinning


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thought OG meant Olive Garden


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

always passes gas before leaving a room


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

secretly admires positive people


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a Hot Topic gift card to use but can't find nothing there to buy


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Drinks juice with the pulp


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Lurves clowns


----------



## the end of silence (Oct 21, 2017)

Hates goats on the quiet


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

had his library card revoked


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Spilled cologne on the floor of the frat house, some dude complained


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

his msds says to keep him away from cherry pie


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

He could make a grown man cry


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

An ordinary office worker by day, a zumba instructor by night


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once ordered half a donut


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Collects whale blubber


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Sometimes hangs out in high class cafes for hours on end but only gets a bottle of water


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Watches claw machine videos on YouTube


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has fishie breath


----------



## Lohikaarme (Aug 28, 2013)

Has been known to regularly bypass the 5-second rule when it comes to dropped food.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ppl call her Lokiharme


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

They told him to head "west" but he thought they said "weast"


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has an abundance of ice nine and is willing to use it, if he hasn't already


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Took a selfie with a sea cucumber


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is the one dressing up as a wendigo and terrorizing local goats


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Napped on Pluto


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Takes a nap when it's nippy


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

he hasn't showered in over a month


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Rubs cheese on her pits


----------



## AvoidantGuy (Oct 1, 2017)

Eats the pit cheese after


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Dances in the bathroom


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

likes to grow out his finger and toe nails so they're long and curly


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Posts in old threadz


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Does not post in Just For Fun threads.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Quacks in his sleep


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Puts microphones in other people's bedrooms.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Does sock puppet shows for other people's pet spiders


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

runs with his arms flailing through crowded shopping centers


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sings loudly in public restrooms


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Assassinated the ant queen


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Brought bland beans to the pot luck social


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

fed ant sandwiches to his coworkers


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Pops ppls bubble gum bubbles with a needle


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a needle collection scrapbook


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Flosses with a needle


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

collects used needles


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Did the ceiling in Dixie cups


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is designated driver for his goats


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

once read a 3 volume book set in large print on "How to Save the Trees"


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a PH.D in pew pew


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Chuggs prune joose


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

puts his pants on both legs at once with his socks sewed in the bottom


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

builds tiny towns with legos only to knock them all down so he can pretend he's godzilla


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Stuffed a Mcdouble into her coat pocket for later


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

funnynihilist said:


> Stuffed a Mcdouble into her coat pocket for later


ummmm so? 

scratches himself with a mini cactus bevause it hurts so good


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Collects uneaten Mcdoubles


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

yuck lol collects ants from the ground for weird science experiments


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Warms actual bread buns in the heated seats of the Escalade


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

thinks if buries used candles he will grow a candle tree


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once called someone a prude only to find out that their last name is indeed "Prude"


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Owns a collection of dirt clods


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Owns a collection of dirts


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

sleeps in a bed of dirt


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a Witch


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is a witch hunter


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sleeps with fidget spinners


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses a spinal cord as a back scratcher


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Is a hacker


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

raises wolves to keep people off his land


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was banned from Ant island


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Lolled his way all the way to the bathroom


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

sewer gator hunter


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Signed up for a nude grape picking class


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

likes nude horseback riding


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eats it right out the can


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Makes animals outta condoms


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

makes condoms out of animals


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Inked on the floor


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Asks people at yoga class "why are you all bent out of shape?"


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Says "Ksksksk" to infants


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

switches infants at the hospital so nobody ever goes home with their actual baby


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays with lint


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a low credit score


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

runs a huge phishing scam empire


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a Nigerian Queen


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Amon said:


> Is a Nigerian Queen


 is a bot


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Stuffs tots of the tater behint other people's ears


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

started with one potato boat, now runs an empire called BubbaTaters


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Never looks back, but does look sideways


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

has goat vision


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Had a vision on aisle 12 and now that is a sacred area of that store


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

does community theater, but with goats


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes his milkshakes pine flava


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

he wears his sunglasses at night


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

pops balloons and bubbles


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Eats ant sandwiches


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Puts ants in other people's pants


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

these people have a thing for ants. neo has been converted to antism


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

has magic powers to transform teddy bears into little puppy dogs. it's how he got his dog


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Put ants into Neo's drank


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Dranks vodka made from beans


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Amon said:


> Put ants into Neo's drank


Saw me put ants in Neo's drink


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

not invited to any of my future picnics


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

They say he only wears underwear every other day


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows about ppls underwear habits


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Prefers the ones with elastic


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is a commando kind of guy


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a commodo kind of gal


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bought a curved 4k for his Nintendo 64


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Got 64 problems but goats ain't one of them


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Got 69 problems and goats are all of them.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Never leaves home without at least one bulb of onion with him. But for what? Well, that remains a mystery to this very day.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Banned for taking onion pills


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Bans people in the rumor thread.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

we are off today, Samantha is calling us all out. She's the order police


----------



## RyanIsNerdy (Apr 20, 2017)

^ Punched a wheelchair once. What an ableist.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

I would never! lol unless it ran over my feet.

Is best friends with aliens


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

SamanthaStrange said:


> Bans people in the rumor thread.


**** it all! It's that toxic coffee I just drank!


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Can melt a snowman just by looking at it.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Works at SETI and thus has first-hand insight to the goings on with extraterrestrial life matters


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Coughed up a hairball, called it art


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Goes to the forest on weekends to hunt ants.


----------



## RyanIsNerdy (Apr 20, 2017)

^ Coughed up a loogie, called it a shart.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Secret name is AlphaGeraltStrange


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes to eat the peels as well


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

enjoys eating tooth paste


----------



## Overdrive (Sep 19, 2015)

Loves K


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is a flotation head thingee that swims the seas looking for other flotation head thingees


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

drives a golf cart everywhere he goes, including getting on the highway and into the mall


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is obsessed with this thread xD


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Is obsessed with his head xD


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

was once possessed by Bernie Sanders' hair


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wonders what Colonel Sanders breath smells like


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once licked other people's fingers and said "good!"


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

he likes his women with hooves for feet


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes a hoover date sometimes


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

buys all the sunglasses on the rack


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

tried the building leap thing, now is two inches shorter


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is from another dimension


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Created the Matrix
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

was suspended for wearing suspenders


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

is actually an edible butterfly
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sells edible pencils on etsy


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

in a grateful dead cover band called the goatful dead


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wears out the groat skin long johnnys I got her for Christmas to the local sloon


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once spooned with a famous person


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

became famous for throwing spoons


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bends spoons with her sichic abilitays


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has one of those animatronic stuffed animals that's popular among young ladies


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Burned something at Burning Man


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has furry feet to keep his toes warm


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

Stop! Neo doesn't like that rumors are made about them.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has several kittens in cryogenic sleep for future use


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

watches a lot of movies where boy gets girl, loses girl, then gets her back at the end; but openly wonders why the boy is always the one to make significant changes to prove himself while the girl always remains her same lovable self from the beginning. He thinks it's patently unfair.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Gets his salt from the ocean


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

It is said that he carries around dental floss wherever he goes in case of emergencies


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

goes into convenience stores at night dressed as batman


----------



## Montee (Aug 8, 2015)

Will write a dm to me saying 'hi'


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

People say he actually starred in one episode of Ghost Adventures. The validity of this claim has yet to be verified by the authors of Ghost Adventures Wiki page.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Montee said:


> Will write a dm to me saying 'hi'


I have no idea what dm means to this day 

Alpha Tauri is a real ghost hunter and all the others are frauds


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Will be the poster below me


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

thank you neo that was so hard  I had to practice resistance.

Saved me from falling into a trap


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

flustered by anybody else in sunglasses


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Exaggerates achievements.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sniffs doorknobs


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

has a doorknob sniffer installed in his door to identify him as home security


----------



## Timeofallout (Jun 23, 2010)

Is the official doorknob sniffing aficionado for Bloodhound Security Incorporated. Keeping you safe since 2001.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is an internet rapper who calls himself T-Fallout


----------



## Timeofallout (Jun 23, 2010)

Has a failed Discovery Channel Show "The Horse Whisper".


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is dancing in the rain (Nathan it's RAINING)


----------



## Timeofallout (Jun 23, 2010)

Nathan sticks his head outside to discover it isn't raining in his part of the desert. Alie likes to get other peoples hopes up with inaccurate weather forecasts 30 miles off.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once patted a bean and said "who's a good bean?"


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is a fermented bean wine connoisseur


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Signed a legal document in pink ink


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

signed over custody of his goats to me in purple ink


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has this tendency to replace the dots in letters is and js to hearts


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Loitered at the laundromat


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Legend has it that he's still in search of the person who kicked his monkey and then proceeded to _use _ his goat


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bit someone's beach ball and ruuuined their fuuun


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Still uses a green monochrome serial terminal to catalogue his beanie baby collection


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

has a collection of beans he keeps in a velvet pouch underneath his pillow.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Stole my bean and smuggled it out in her nostril


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bought some "Goat Essence by Loreal" shamp-o


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

went goat fishing hoping to impress the groat king


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Secretly hates horses


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ate an uncrustable *while* riding a horse


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

finds putting a flower in his hair accents his beauty


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

makes his own organic dinosaur nuggets


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once sat on a mcnugget in the minivan


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once had a rift with a raft


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a bad habit of wasting goats; thinks they grow on trees


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Grew a pair of shoes from a kit


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

has a bad habit of getting wasted with goats


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sets goals for ghouls


----------



## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

Rumor has it that your 8,500 years old!


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Still reading Fitty Shades of Gatorade


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is slowly having his organs replaced by bionic ones so he could truly become a robot and thus live forever


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a house plant holding his owners hostage


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sells weapons to plants


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

sells weaponized plants


----------



## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

She has wings like a butterfly


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

can often be found running through fields with a butterfly net above his head


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

has a bullet with butterfly wings


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

smashes defenseless pumpkins


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

thinks it's 1979


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

lol i have Zero interest in goats. Even though you Try, Try, Try you have failed Thirty-three wives already. You need to Stand Inside Your Love!


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns an invisible cloak


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

The cold gives him strength


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

gave his duck the human flu


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

gave Haley Joel Osment career advice after the Sixth Sense


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Full name is Farfie Noogie


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

My neighbor's uncle's best friend's cousin to the 3rd degree claims that the guy who posts before me was once abducted by aliens


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Got the feels for someone with the last name of Feels


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

his full name is Toost Feeny


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Makes a loofa out of burnt toost


----------



## Overdrive (Sep 19, 2015)

Makes goat music


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is a (misunderstood) super villain in his home town. wears pink spandex bodysuits and yells at litterers and chases misbehaving children with sticks.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has crashed a beaver dam partay, more than once


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is terrorized by woodland critters on his walks around Walden Pond making his poetry a bit edgy


----------



## Overdrive (Sep 19, 2015)

Loves the coco pops


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

loves anything coke related


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Had a routine Papsi test, all was fine


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

likes to run tests on mountain dew to see if it'll transform his goats into super mountain goats


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Angers King Groat every time she belches


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

orders a pair of #4s with a french accent when he wants to impress a first date at a fine dining establishment


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Always asks to smell the cork and rub it gently on his brow to check for temperature correctness


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

charges exorbitant goat studding fees


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is known as the simple guy on his reality show


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

refuses me seconds at his night job at Costco


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

I'm the reason he got fired from the costco


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Always leaves to seat halfway up/halfway down


----------



## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

Has armor so sharp it punctured a hole in the hull of an Empire Class Fire Navy Battleship, leaving thousands to drown at sea. Because it was so sharp.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Peed pants at the zoo, somewhere around the peenguins.


----------



## Sus y (Aug 30, 2017)

My friends, I came here to tell the E! True Hollywood Story about funnycatnihilist, he's not a goat, nope. Shocking, I know.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Recently ordered a book on demonology from Amazon. Thinks it's a ripoff.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

thinks *The Exorcist* gets funnier every time he watches it


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Smashed a pair of scissors with a boulder


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Once terrorized his neighborhood by wearing a tiki themed mask when taking walks late at night for a while


----------



## clarkekent (Dec 2, 2015)

Won a million dollars' lottery last year. Stashed it away in a foreign bank.


----------



## clarkekent (Dec 2, 2015)

Was Jessica Alba and Kate Beckinsale's toyboy for a few years.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Loves to spread rumors about himself and enjoys it when the rumors he's started reaches back to him all exaggerated and blown out of proportion


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lives in Quezon City


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bought a bot


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

sold all of his bots


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a cushion filled with tater tots


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once fudged a futon to fit in a foyer


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

It is said that he can't go a day without telling anyone an alliterative statement


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is the oldest living human being known in existence, incredibly sharp and youthful in appearance too. possibly found the fountain of youth.


----------



## clarkekent (Dec 2, 2015)

Is a weed dealer.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Can't even name two rhyming words.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

knows an awful lot about sea slugs


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Always has hot sauce handy


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thinks mayonnaise is an instrument


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is still waiting for Santa


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Filled a piñata with bees much to the dismay of the person who smashed it open. Will do it again but first needs to watch out for meddling kids.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Can sometimes be sassy AND gassy


----------



## clarkekent (Dec 2, 2015)

Heard he has a goatee.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

most of his experiments are designed with and without cheese


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes whane and chaase


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

met someone called the humorousevolutionist at the supermarket earlier today and fell head over heels infatuated with her over a nice brunch


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Titled his boat "The Gravy Boat"


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

prances on potato wedges


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Gave a cop a wedgie


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a tiny ant


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has an aunt nicknamed "Tiny"


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has an awesome bearded friend named Martin


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Asked to braid my beard but didn't like the price I quoted


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Always asks for unreasonable prices


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has done more pushups today than I have all week


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

prefers to buck than push up


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Only goes to the _jim_ for the free moist towelettes


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

wipes down other people's stations for them and gives them a deep muscle massage in between sets. He's very nice.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Makes figurines out of his toenail clippings.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks Tom Brady _overinflates_ his balls.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is the really cool TMNT member whose name I can't recall


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

His favorite comfort cartoon is Happy Tree Friends


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns the HTF DVD's


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

owns an archaic VHS collection he refuses to let go of


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Owns Home Alone in every video format


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

rents out his basement to Macaulay Culkin


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Groans at red lights


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is secretly a party animal. No one ever knows because he always wears a mask when going to such congregations


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

all his parties end with the police and irate neighbors


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Hoards canned goods and weapons in his bedroom in case the apocalypse arrived


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

invested in a steel plated helmet for the next zombie invasion


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Prefers dolla bills to hundo dollar bills


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

House is painted all white, outside and inside


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Hides huge amounts of moolah in his socks instead of his wallet in case he gets robbed


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Holds the deed to the raunch


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is a closet grassroots activist


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

uses a wheelbarrow to carry his lunch and afternoon snacks with him


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Shares shart stories around the campfire


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

his neighbors have started a petition to get him to quit gardening in the nude


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Throws pies at the elderly


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Barks at dogs


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Works @ Weenie Hut Jr's


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ran over a Milky Way candy bar with his car then ate it


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Only goes to _cherch_ on Tuesdays... At a quarter to 2AM.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bowled a perfect 1000


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Always loses in Connect 4


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once said "you stank my battleship!"


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has played real-life Battleships with aliens... turns out it was only a dream


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bought out the store, reopened it, bought it out again


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

every time he's asked, "do you want fries with that?", he says "Damn right, I do"


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Flew it straight up the flag pole!


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Zig Zagged underwater


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

has a tiny notebook where he writes down all the rumours he's about to spread


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is Keanu Reeve's long lost brother.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

likes to wear leather tights and ride motorcycles with her butt in the air... and we're all better for it.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

It wasn't a meteor that crashed in the Yucatan Peninsula millions of years ago and causing the downfall of the dinosaurs; it was actually his spaceship (it was a huge one)


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sells cheap doughnuts with baby powder on em


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

once had a job where he had to dress up as the Pillsbury doughboy


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

when he is really hungry he imagines other people as foods


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Was born without a belly button. But of course, this only remains a rumor as they've never been seen outside not wearing a onesie


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Breaks into hotel rooms to fluff the pillows


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Eats rock cereal every morning


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

rock, paper, scissors- national champ


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Tried to cut a rock with scissors


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

his dog likes to take him for a walk about once a day as long as he stays of the garbage


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Breaks into people's homes at night when everyone's sleeping and cleans and arranges stuff inside the said house


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was arrested for ghosticide


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

leaves a trail of ectoplasm wherever he goes


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Once watched reruns of The Brady Bunch for 24 hours straight.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is A Nuo


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Was John Wayne's PA in his past life


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

does the "shrieking girl being chased by a homicidal psychopath" on cue whenever someone sticks a fluffy mouse in front of him


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Drives a Volkswagen


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Made a booger sandwich once


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Uses excess mucus during colds as body lotion


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Covers his foot with nutella


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Plans to cover his feet with Nutella and run screaming around his school campus as part of his campaign on squirrel rights awareness


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Rode a snail once


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

gave a speech on the perils of giving speeches


----------



## GeorgeCostanzaTheMovie (Mar 11, 2016)

Is actually farfegnugen


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Had a fight with a loofa


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Put a loofa next to a loaf


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Looks at cat loaf pics while eating cereal


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Makes it rain monies


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He doesn't know de wae


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Makes clothes for his toy poodle by hand


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

Dis one knows de wae.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Knows de wae but charges a convenience fee to tell de wae


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was kicked in dae wae wae


----------



## Great Expectations (Jan 25, 2018)

Is Siberian bitcoin mining company tycoon.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has an extra toe


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Never eats anything sweet until the 21st of every month


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a special eyelid towel


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is addicted to dotz


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is in his throne of banning right now


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

got into a fork fight in a cafeteria


----------



## flyingMint (Aug 31, 2015)

once locked himself in a room and watched the film "Sunrise" 2000 times before stepping back outside.


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

Never flushes the toilet.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is the one that got away, and now is being hunted down by his three not-necessarily-evil exes.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Takes a flashlight into the shower, why? Nobody knows.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Takes a fleshlight into the shower, why? Everybody knows.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has competed in the toilet Olympics


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cloned a clone machine


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Attacked a mechanical heart


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Actually comes from the stone age; was revived by thawing the ice where he was frozen from in 2012


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is secretly a witch in a coven


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks Bigfoot should be added to the Endangered Species List.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is secretly bred in the oven


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ruined something that was already ruined


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a weenie


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke a sweat shopping for nanners


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes the smell of skunk


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Dripped maple syrup on their jeans but didn't give a crepe!


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Made a past Mod vanish


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

writing a screenplay about a banning game on a message board where people who get banned at midnight mysteriously disappear. It has to do with aliens.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sold a $550 iPad for $1


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Actually has a secondary pair of jaws inside their mouth that can extend up to a foot to better reach prey inside their burrows


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Currently has a crow on his foot


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Got upset cause thought a tree was making a face at him


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Donated only 55 cents to the crab club


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

belts out Celine Dion songs at the gym


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sings "Let It Go" while on the toilet


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is kewl


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Makes up rumours about self


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a rumor doomer


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays Doom on an original Pentium chip


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has plenty of stuffed animal friends surrounding him when he sleeps (to fend off the monsters)


----------



## Perkins (Dec 14, 2010)

Cries when he ejaculates.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Cried once at a Perkins restaurant


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once had Perkinsons disease


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

The primary reason he takes long walks at the beach is to look for and collect random items like plastic bottles, car tires, or doll limbs to display on his shelf


----------



## hyliankitten (Jan 31, 2018)

Eats pizza with a fork


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Uses sandpaper as facial tissue to prove their toughness


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Makes one of their goats wear a skeletal demon mask in their pen for entertainment once in a while


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bakes the love right in


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Was recently hired by the government to act as an intermediary between humans and the Anunnaki


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Served celery sticks to pige0ns


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Keeps all their money inside their mattress because they don't have faith in banks


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Believes that their reflection in a mirror is their evil twin.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks cow chips are a brand of potato chip.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Made a snow woman with breastesses and everything


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Made a manure sandwich


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Left a dog turd in a paper bag on the neighbors front porch


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was killed instantly by a water gun


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

likes to swim through the suddenly warm spots in public pools


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Can make his own bubbles


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

wears bubble wrap clothing to pick up compulsive women


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Never had a breath mint in his life and ain't about to try one now!


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

likes to assign people lots of homework


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Refuses to entertain bored people


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has too many pet snails


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Cries himself to sleep every time after watching his all-time favorite movie because he can relate to it on a personal level


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Squeezes lemon on his wounds


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Always makes a sandwich with three bread slices


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Takes selfie with a can of beans


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Kicked an orangutans butt


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Constantly wears a beanie to hide his beautiful locks of gold which measures in length to no less than a meter


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wears a beanie on top of his beanie


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is currently on the interstate heading weast-bound


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks 'Five Guys' should change their name to 'Several People'.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sticks his foot out and says "have a nice trip"


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sticks his foot out and asks "did you have a good summer? Have a nice fall"


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Learned his Chinese from a menu of a local Chinese restaurant


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Successfully cloned many BBQ Wings


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is from the future... one possible future where really bad futuristic stuff happens unless we give him all our credit card numbers to fix it


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

steals and collects tiny pieces of wallpaper from walls everytime he visits people's houses


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has steering wheel cover made of hemp


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

held up a liquor store with a glue gun


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is confused that the first meal of the day is breakfast but if he ate dinner after midnight wouldn't that officially qualify as breakfast.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Is convinced that his cat has ESP.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

The last time he wore a toga(for graduation), he was completely naked underneath. No one until now ever found out about it


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants to take selfies on the Sun


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is representing this website in the Olympics this year


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually -5 years old


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Has a collection of "Bigfoot droppings" in his basement.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is really a bunch of monkeys pounding on keyboards


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a invisible shield


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Went to a bar and complained that his stool is loose


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Always need to urinate whenever he finds a good hiding spot in hide n seek


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

pees on pedestrians from his hiding spot in a tree


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Named his pet hamster 'Toby' after his favorite character on The Office.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a lover who is in love with love


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has demons in his closet


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Buys the pawder not the hointment


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

once rubbed a cut onion in his eye to let women know he can be more sensitive when he needs to be


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Buy only onions for sensitive skin


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Uses deodorant as a spice


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is allergic to water


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a second account "lingus69"


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is a closet fan of the _Hex Girls_


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once said "Beep Beep Boop Boop Bop"


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is a fish


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has banned like 6 people on SAS already since joining; tells no one about it of course


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Took a nap during the Olympic coverage


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

can't help but to flex anytime he walks by a mirror...welcome to the gun show


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Bed is made out of rocks


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a blank


----------



## calimerc (Jul 20, 2016)

Doesn't eat fruits or vegetables and is a picky eater


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Unsuccessfully Cloned an ant


----------



## calimerc (Jul 20, 2016)

Thinks little puppies and kittens are gross


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Licks their cats to bond with them


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Was kicked out of a library for passing gas.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is obsessed with bodily fluids


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Every Christmas, he goes around their neighborhood and fills socks with lumps of coal


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

uses dinosaur fossils to fuel his car


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Has abnormally large tonsils.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

his appendix is so big, it has its own appendix


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Collects people's rejected organs from hospitals to create a morbid pickled organ museum


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Puts a coat hanger under his sleeve


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Threw a garbage can into a garbage can


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns thousands of pet maggots


----------



## IcedOver (Feb 26, 2007)

Killed Laura Palmer.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Crept up on the crepes


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Can't go a week without watching Hey Paula at least once


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has slept his way up the corporate ladder


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tickled the puffin man


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Fluffs on Sunday


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Pees on the beach


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Watches ppl P


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Swims with sharks.


----------



## calimerc (Jul 20, 2016)

Swims with dolphins


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Rides a bear to school; no one ever finds out because he goes before everyone else


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Borks at racoons


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is a serial killer who makes a mask and then kills his target with that mask, then makes another mask...


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns lots of masks and is very mysterious o.o


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Thinks I hate him ;-;


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a mountain of mysterious and possibly cursed objects beneath his bed


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Constantly refers to his neighbor's cat as "Philip".


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Asks cats what they want when they start meowing to him


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eats cottage cheese outside the cottage


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks the third stooge was underrated.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Middle name is Letis


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Gropes the grapes at the stoor


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Knicks the knacks


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Loaves on the stove top


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Baked a cake looked like cat loave


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a tendency to talk about cats to himself when alone


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once caught limp lip but it cleared up quickly


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Speaks with a heavy but clearly fake French accent when among his goat friends


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Woke up a whale


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Can actually do over 30 pushups but only does like 3 or 5 when around the presence of people


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Doesn't drink enough orange joose


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Wears tights constantly in the hopes of becoming a 'merry man.'


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows the Muffin Woman


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Teaches his birds swear words

Sent using Tapatalk because SAS post limit is utterly stupid


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a weenie


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Bathes in paint once in a while and calls it a night


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Still draws on the walls


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

serves pie with a dollop of shaving cream on top


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Spilled water all over the fish


----------



## calimerc (Jul 20, 2016)

Never tips at restaurants


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Always tips the barber exactly 79 cents every single time


----------



## The Condition of Keegan (Feb 1, 2016)

He can fly.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has a giant fly swatter and a healthy hatred for The Matrix movies


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Always "brings it"


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ate a whole loaf in one day


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

There always seems to be moments of gold and flashes of light when he tries remembering something


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Uses organic cheese as golf club grips


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Beeped tomorrow


----------



## Msterling222 (Feb 21, 2018)

I've been told that he ( ^ ) doesn't use his turn signals when he's driving


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Pretends to know what he's doing when he's defragmenting his hard drive


----------



## Perkins (Dec 14, 2010)

Sleeps in a onesie.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

pillages small villages


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cuts ppl out of his life by severing them into little pieces


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Throws people


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has a goo fetish.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is secretly on the downlow with the person above him


----------



## fluorish (Sep 24, 2016)

IS a liar


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a liaur


----------



## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)

it's a spam bot..


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is crazy


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Hates me ;-;


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Makes toast from old cake slices


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Has colluded with the Russians.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is obsessed with Russians


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has plenty of somebodies that he used to know


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Still reads newspapers


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a Neoe


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Made a duct tape wallet back in 2010


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Grows macho houseplants


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Holds a cigarette with tweezers


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Put a condom over the dorm officer's gear shifter on a dare one night


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Poked a whale blubber


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

His real hair color is green but constantly dyes it


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is actually a cartoon person


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Wears a turban wherever he goes to hide Voldemort at the back of his head


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Once yelled "Fire!" in a crowded theater, later denied it.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is obsessed with anything Russian related


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke someone's magic wand on purpose


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Picked a pickle, popped a pimple, all in five minutes time


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knows the dust collecter


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Laughs like a weenie


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Will dive from a height of at least 30 meters to prove his love for banana pie!


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Slaps people with bananas


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Pokes sleeping people with sticks to see if they're still alive


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a house made outta gold


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is Van Gogh's long lost relative Van Google


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has gold on the ceiling, he ain't blind, just a matter of time


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

hopefully avoiding that nor-easter by getting an early start on coloring some eggs


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

His nails are fake


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

His bag is constantly filled with sandwiches


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

pretends he's Italian to pick up women at local hangouts by ending all his words in -o and -i


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

is the same person as Amon and funnynihilist
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Fooled around and fell in love


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Showers in the rain


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a Nao


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Sizzles and smokes when exposed to even just the shadow of a church


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Bursts into flames when he steps into a church


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Toots his own horn


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

always gets that shopping cart that has a wheel that goes around and around


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Believes that he's a lycanthrope and locks himself up during full moons


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Barks at the mailman


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Sometimes takes interstate bus trips only to buy a ticket to where he came from and ride the same bus home


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Praises Apple but secretly preordered a Samsung S9


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a lot of things going on in his head, most of them involves which flavor of pie the likes best


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is actually a jellyfish living in the ocean.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually sitting in a loaf postion now


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Cheats at Scribble


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was born on 01/01/01


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is made of jelly


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Gives Molang soda


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Picked nose at a national park


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

tried to use a stud finder this weekend, but it kept pointing at him


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Shadow boxes with other people's shadows


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Moisturizes his privates.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is willing to trade the Elder Wand for Butterbeer


----------



## MTFHR (Mar 6, 2018)

eats pizza


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a noob


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Thinks some clouds look like breastices


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Thought the moon was a cookie


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

left a fluffy and said "cuse me"


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is a light sleeper but a heavy dreamer


----------



## Quiet as a moth (Apr 1, 2013)

Eats toast off the floor.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Retails 'Unholy Towels' at a heavily discounted price online. But wait; there's more! If you order now, you not only get one, not two, not three, but 12 free Unholy Towels - all for the price of one!
So what are you waiting for? Buy now!


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Tried putting a donut into the CD drive


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Grovels at the deli counter


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Once tried to sell his belly button lint on eBay - no takers.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Melts soap in the microwave


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Threw a stone while stoned


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Buys his wardrobe at The Dollar Store.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sings a lot of show tunes on the way to work and doesn't care who knows it


----------



## Affiliate60 (Nov 13, 2017)

Decided to breach into my account 2 hours after I created it.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a newb


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Writes poetry on graph paper


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Hoards broccoli


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Drinks snake venon


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Actually is multilingual, knows at least 25 langues, but only chooses to speak English all the time


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once napped in a snowball


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is actually NOT the guy in his profile.


----------



## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Likes cartoons


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is old


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sneaked an extra large pie into a movie theater


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Pepper sprayed a robot


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a spandex toilet seat cover


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

A time traveller from the late 2100s, he went back to this time to change some catastrophic event set to happen within the next decade


----------



## Kyabe (Mar 8, 2018)

Is allergic to Math books


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Only likes hard cheese


----------



## VinDecent (Mar 8, 2018)

Hahah


----------



## clarkekent (Dec 2, 2015)

he's the one


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is the two


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

collects stolen braces


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Grimaces at grime


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Has loose stools.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses rocks as pillows


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

growls at his pets when they get near his lunch


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

is currently writing a book about confusion


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Started a Frisbee golf league at work


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

a big book on making bread fell on her head 


(creating psychedelic hallucinations and maybe some brain damage)

damn you, FN--- drops bowling balls out of 2nd story windows when someone knocks on his door


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

throws books on people's heads :afr


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

doesn't believe in modern learning methods of dropping books on your head


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

criticizes loaves and other wonderful individuals


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Grew a crop of potatums


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

lives in a mushroom full of mushy stuff


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

sells ducks, whales and microwaves


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Borrows borrowed things from people


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

ask for refunds after he's eaten 3/4 of his sandwich


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

brutally stabs birthday cakes


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

drowns her donuts in a tall glass of milk


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

poisons rice with a deadly pinch of salt


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sneezes on people that smell like pepper


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

wears pepper perfume


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks 'Wheel of Fortune' is for intellectuals.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

is a bot pretending to be another bot


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Took a nap and had a dream about taking a nap


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Secretly working on a cure for anime addiction


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Massages olive oil on feet


----------



## Going Sane (Oct 24, 2012)

1/3 chances he's gay


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

1/3 chances he owns a brazier


----------



## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

1/3 chances he lives in a castle


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

1/3 chances has seen every season of House


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

1/3 chance he cray-cray


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns a box of cray crayons


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Calls me a troll behind my back.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once trolled a real troll


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Hasn't done the annual change of bed sheets yet


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Drives an AMC Pacer


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is fluent in nonsense


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Frolics in the rain when no one's watching


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Got caught poking a mannequin


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Got a storage room filled with cheese


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ate all of the Chicharon :bah


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Was the one who crushed all the remaining chicharon and sprinkled them in my soup bowl when I wasn't looking


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cloned a clone machine


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has been cloning dogs for years but has only came out about it recently


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Named his boat "Iron Scrote"


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Prefera Skittles over M&Ms


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Reads legalise to a women's wine group


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Sometimes just makes up the words to the Pledge of Allegiance because he's forgotten most of it already


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

at some point this month is his anniversary date for joining this site, and sadly I haven't really thought about getting him anything for it. There's always Amon


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is my 1 year old account supposed to be a rumor? 

--------------------------------------

Keeps a record of active SAS members' join dates wherever he goes in his notes app of choice in his phone for the sole purpose of spreading rumors about them


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is still a noob for another week
and 
gives octagenarians piggy back rides to and from the bathroom


----------



## cinto (Jun 19, 2017)

Voted best avatar on a forum by Forbes


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Their bedside drawer is filled with chicken bones; these are for emergency seances


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

faceplants once a day as part of his beauty regimen


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

is trying to achieve green hair by eating salad


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Secretly likes Krabby Patties


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

takes the escalator on his hikes in the mountains


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Has a side job as a clown.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Uses emojis with people he personally knows... A lot!


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes to describe many things as being "herky jerky"


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is beefy


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Switched to all organic light bulbs


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Gets sad when he isn't able to make use of all 50 allotted posts here on SAS in a day


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has been using Tapatalk since 1999


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has prudence not to disturb seagulls while they're feasting on raw Fleisch


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eats margarine sandwiches


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

traces people's outlines...fills it in with macaroni and food coloring


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Refers to large people as "husky".


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Keeps a briefcase under his bed full of BDSM paraphernalia


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a NEoh


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Knees people in the shins and run away giggling


----------



## Whatswhat (Jan 28, 2018)

Is scared of Lord Farquaad


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has $1000 in Toys R Us gift cards


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

His bed isn't made up of foam, it's made up of sexy magazines that he just covers with a bed sheet


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Secretly wears high heels


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Causes SAS to crash.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants access to ppls PMs


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Kidnaps moderators.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Kicks opossums


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Makes rumors about people.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is currently working on a bot that thinks and acts like him in real life


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is a gradient in real life.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks those pink ***** hats are very fashionable.


----------



## Whatswhat (Jan 28, 2018)

Eats chicken pot pie for breakfast


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bathes in red whine


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

He is in perfect mental health and just comes here to laugh at people's problems.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wants to be a Cheerleader when he grows up


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

thinks the Irish people should quit pushing their holiday superstitions on everybody, despite dyeing his hair green


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a green toenail


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has Green Eggs And Ham For Dinner


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Dressed like a shamrock sheik on 3/17


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Favorite movie is Mean Girls.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Cooks a mean bean


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is one of those who from heaven to Earth came


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Nickname is Aphiphi


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke a glass at Applebees


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a morning owl


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Throws cream pies at cloons


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Pinches Krab nipples


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Cleans the windshield with dollar bills


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Drank a donut


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has this incomprehensible ritual of walking around the cemetery grounds twice every 3rd Thursday of the month at 1:43AM in a dark hooded robe


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Has an extensive criminal record


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once walked topless through the mall


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got kicked out of their dimensional realm by the meta-cosmic sanhedrin and council of girls and is consequently, a multi-dimensional drifter, and *loves* to teleport to seemingly "random" houses on "random" planets, housing "random" lifeforms; appears in their rooms, and chuckles softly over the bodies of the unsuspecting sleepers; facing only exactly a measurement analogous to an inch away from their faces. Not once has he been caught, and when the lifeforms awake, sensing something is not right, he's vanished!!! For some reason, when one connects the dots between the cosmic coordinates from the "random" escapades, it always resemble a kind of symmetrical geometrical pattern.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes to make up REALLY long rumors


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Currently assembling an ultimate network-based collective robotic entity to take over the world.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Threw a recycle bin in the trash


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Is filthy rich but lonely.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Holds the wrath of the meta-gods inside of every cell in their body.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

failed geometry 3 times then became an English major


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays 80 style drums on the weekend


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Eats beans for breakfast, lunch and dinner.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Can chew on Nature Valley bars without leaving crumbs


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has a collection of creepy teddy bears that he whispers to every night.


----------



## Venus444 (Mar 21, 2018)

Neo said:


> Splits atoms by day
> Drives Ariel Atoms by night


...thinks rain is God's tears.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Opened a can of beans with a laser


----------



## Venus444 (Mar 21, 2018)

funnynihilist said:


> Opened a can of beans with a laser


Asked for some of my beans because you were saving yours


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is anti bean


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Says beans run right through him


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Takes a bath in beans.


----------



## Venus444 (Mar 21, 2018)

Wanderlust26 said:


> Takes a bath in beans.


Has a closet full of clip on bangs.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Is the CEO of Venus razors.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Pines away for pine treez


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

When angered, turns into a raging fire-bender that can bend lightning as well (Watch out!!!).


----------



## Venus444 (Mar 21, 2018)

Neo said:


> Was so proud recently, to finally upgrade from a NES to a SNES.


is currently trying to hybridize the first human-bean in his basement


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

went on shopping spree in the bean district


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Created a reverse meta-beanieverse full of sentient beans, and the container is a..... Bean can!!!


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Believes he is the God of Beans.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has an unhealthy fear of one day being part of a sandwich


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Collects every strand of fur their cats shed in the hopes to create a coat with it someday


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Lights up a room..after eating Taco Bell


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Took a chunk outta the Sun


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

Thinks chocolate cake is the best choice for a breakfast


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is the heir to his family's hare hair care business


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Bought the one and only furry team mascot costume from his school as a collectible


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Once Wang Chunged all night.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Doesn't really know what email is, and then goes on to look up bombs on the internet


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Clumsily Teleported out of his realm, and fell into the arms of a goddess.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is an Ant Whisperer


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has an ant problem in the bean garden


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is actually ant-man.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Hoards chihuahuas.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Really nice online, but super super scary in person.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Runs a scary person museum in Vancouver


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

funnynihilist said:


> Runs a scary person museum in Vancouver


Is absolutely in love with Goosebumps books, and stalks R.L Stine online.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Whistles in the restroom stall


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Once, kicked down a stall while someone was in the midst of "number 2"; mocked them, and ran away.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has created several fanfics with SAS members for main characters


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has an obsession with Mr. Krabs, oranges, and tomatoes.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Dislikes fish food


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Sneaks absurd amounts of beans and blueberries inside of the pillows belonging to his household members; giving them a surprise upon bedtime.....


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Lives in Antarctica.


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

Goes with his grandma to play bingo and loves it


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Asked an employee if the olive oil was a virgin


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has laser vision and purple eyes.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Prefers eating meat raw.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Explored the Paris catacombs extensively for exactly a month and re-emerged above, mentally and physically unscathed.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Holds the world record for most reported sightings of Lord Lucan.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Makes mooing noises for 33 seconds before consuming hamburgers.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Is vehemently opposed to the concept of the carbonated beverage.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

hires people to tell him bedtime stories and kiss his forehead goodnight


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Has only recently started to realize that Benjamin Button disease may be fictional.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Scored 5 standard deviations (SD = 15 points) above the mean in regards to the VCI portion of the WAIS-IV.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Doesn't assume equilibrium rates of return when deriving the the elasticity of prices with respect to money.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

The staple contents of his backpack include duct tape, chewing gum, a hairbrush, and a can of tuna


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Picks the daisays


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Made an instance of reminiscing over struggling to solve non-homogenous , linear, second order differential equations to occur.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Licks the lamposts


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Buys high and sells low when investing.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has reused the same tootpick for years!


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

watches a lot of lifetime movies because guys can't be trusted


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Howled in pain just this instant.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Always assumes a triangular distribution in crystal ball when doing his DCFs


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Laughs at graphs


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is not fond of using recursive methods in his code.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Speaks in an arcane language in real life


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Bathed in a tub filled with ants


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a crystal ball for looking up SAS members and what they're doing in real time


----------



## burgerchuckie (May 31, 2012)

Doesn't like the way he looks


----------



## Peacefulness (Mar 23, 2012)

he's secretly the girl Drake is crying about in all his songs.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke the loaf


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Financially well-endowed, and is a master of programming; a deity of software architecture.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Thinks chartreuse and vermillion should switch names.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Threw all the cards in frustration


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Thinks Leonardo DiCaprio shouldn't have an Oscar.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Thinks he doesn't think enough about thinking.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Programs in Malbolge for fun.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Thinks he should stop pondering about the idea of 'fun-ness' in his free time.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

accidentally uses quotient rule when he wants to use L'Hopital's rule on a regular basis.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Forgets to write " + C" after finding the anti-derivative.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Hopes to achieve apotheosis by year's end.


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

Stays absolutely naked while in home


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Mixes up the order in which to insert interval values within the Anti-derivative functions when using the fundamental theorem of calculus.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Always assumes the central limit theorem applies without checking the conditions.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Similarly to that of Albert Einstein; They had mastered differential and integral calculus before the age of 15, and commenced to learn multi-variable calculus thereafter.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Knows who D.B Cooper is.


----------



## Johnny Walker (Mar 10, 2017)

make business with stolen bikes


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Mixes business with leather


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Fanatical about the idea of every man possessing Mario-esque mustaches.


----------



## lanamae (Oct 31, 2017)

is a Trump voter


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Talks to their pillow every night and even named it "Plubbly".


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

I hear he tried to get together with Sara but she thinks he's nothing but trouble and is done with her bad boy phase


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has an uncle named "buncle".


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Allowed the waffles to become freezer burned, we had to throw the ****ers out!


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Recently opened a lemonade stand in front of his home.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Found the Holy Grail yet is planning to keep it for herself throughout her lifetime


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Opened a bottomless restaurant and called it "Tooters"


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Was a prolific rodeo clown that flew too close to the sun.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sprayed the sheets in the guest room with Lysol


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Whisky in the jar is an autobiographical song you composed many years ago.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Favorite line is "throw a little grease on it!"


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Spent a summer on a fishing boat in Alaska, part of him never came back.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sent a jarred fart to China


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Hordes his bananas.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eats the labels too


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Thinks the rind is the best part.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has been keeping all the beans to himself all this time


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Just returned from a secret inter-galactic war with the race of evil simians.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Had a hard time deciding at the loaf store


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Loves the smell of uncooked ham.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Exclaims "Little piglet shall be mine!!!" before consuming bacon.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Named his pet rabbit Bun Bun


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Keeps an entire notebook of rumor ideas he could post on this particular thread


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Claims to own a Unicorn ranch.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Drank a Coca Cola and said it tasted good


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Puts ketchup on his beans.



funnynihilist said:


> Drank a Coca Cola and said it tasted good


That's no rumor, I do that a lot!


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eats beans with a toothpick


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Likes to pat his sandwiches.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Likes to sandwich his pats.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Currently has a bad case of the mumbles and the giggles.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Belched at the meeting, said nothing


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Scribbled nonsense on the whiteboard, proceeded to topple over the table, released an especially malodorous fart in the face of his boss; and briskly left the meeting thereafter.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Asked for "nuggs" at the drive thru, the girl working there said "what?"


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

The first thing he does when entering an establishment is look for the CCTV cameras and where they're located


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once walked through a car wash


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

tells rumors about other people that may or may not be true


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is trapped inside of an egg.... with internet!


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has an eggy ego, and is a Leo.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is actually a rocket launcher


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is an ant surgeon


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Stores chub in is fridge.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Likes to dress up as a pirate.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Thought he devoured Mr. Krabs in a lucid dream, and retrieved the Krabby Patty secret formula.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

overdosed on reese's peanut butter eggs


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

charges people for using his bathroom


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Made a cough medicine cocktail


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Blows up balloons at werk


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Used to work in a balloon factory.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

explains universal expansion with balloons and a squeaky, helium voice


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Asks "would you like a yum yum?"


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is actually endorsed by Heinz so he has to slip in product placement in all of his messages.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Slips in extra yum yums to bakery patrons


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Put a horse mask onto a horse


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Smoked a pipe at camp


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

watches Groundhog Day every day at the same time


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Does YouTube pooter pranks with his pal, Putin.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Thinks Rocky Mountain Oysters are sea food.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Saving up to buy a uke to play at the campus coffeehouse


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Believes in the Wumbo.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Could never find Waldo.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Found a belly button fortune: it read "things you can't part with should never be lint"


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Once baked a chocolate cake but it fell from his hands as he was getting it out from the oven. Quickly got rid of the mess before anyone noticed.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Slipped, and fell face-first into his birthday cake. Everyone creepily squeaked "Happy Birthday!" as they surrounded him on all sides....


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

barks at people when he's angry and meows when he's pleased.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Likes to poke bloated bellies


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes crinkly sheats


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

was just fired by our president in a tweet


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Lives in a flantasy flan world


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

lives in a gerbil world


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is the national kite flying champion.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Threatened someone with a blade...of grass


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Hides up mango trees and throws the ripe fruit at passersby. The passersby would just think it was merely the ripeness causing the fruit to fall naturally by gravity at them.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Cackled over the cakes


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Always snickers while holding a Snickers


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

throws peanuts at people with severe allergies for fun


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

never accepts a free beanut when it's offered


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Thinks of himself as "the human torch"; but due to his quality of attracting criminals, and figuratively flushing down harsh beatings + other *really* unsavory deeds of said criminals (serving as a "dumping" ground *shudder* *shudder*), he got stuck with the name of "the human toilet".


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Name is Peter Piper


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Had his arguments debunko'd, and his internal logical framework came crashing down.....


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Only shaves the left side of his face.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Lifts trash can lids and shouts "hello?!?!?"


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Can be heard mumbling something about horses from time to time and subsequently giggles uncontrollably about it


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has a real knack for coming up with the most entertaining of bullbunkerdash.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Poked a ded whale and it xploded all over him


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is enrolled in underwater boxing classes


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Joined a group for dads, is not a dad


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has met swtsurrender's daddyo in real life


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Drag raced with swtsurrender and died.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Went sexy grocery shopping with swtsurrender


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

likes to answer the door in his robe, he does his shopping online


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Got an offline Prime account where you mail in your order and payment on parchment paper


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Hired a personal assistant whose sole job is to open canned beans for him.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Opened a can with a rock and a twig more than onced


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

LOL! What with this "swtsurrender" stuffs? :laugh:

Um, loves to go to his local library to book-sniff.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Doesn't keep up with his SAS trivia


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Trust-fell into the shadow realm.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Showed the cashier vacation pictures


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Debunks the debunkers and absolutely *loves* debunkery.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Murdered a bottle of Mustard


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is partially dehydrated


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Lolled someone right up a tree!


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Gave a boot, the boot


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Gets hangery sometimes


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Went on a hunger strike that lasted only 1 hour. No one knows what the strike was even for....


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Loves fruits and creativity.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

carries 10x his body weight everywhere he goes


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

washes his hair with 30 year old italian wine


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Thinks Tahdig sucks.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Doesn't know how to make toast.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got roasted on not knowing how to make toast.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Burns the toost every time


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Boasts about how he got roasted for not knowing how to make toast.


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Likes to eat oranges from the inside out


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Frequently thinks about the time he boasted about getting roasted regarding not knowing how make toast.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has never watched a movie newer than 1981.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Thinks about how he thinks about the time he boasted about getting roasted regarding not knowing how make toast.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Is stuck on a rhyme. Somebody slap the back of this man's head!:O


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Keeps the condoms and condiments in the same place


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Mustard makes a great lube... *shrugs*


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Keeps a deck of cards in his pants pocket at all times.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a deck of cards with different richards on every one


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

cries at the end of sappy movies because he loves sap


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Once fought a Clam


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Thinks about how he doesn't think enough about the thought of how he thinks about the time he boasted about getting roasted regarding not knowing how make toast.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has an engineering degree in the various physical states of bread


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

The tomato sauce raviolli mustache archetype governing the qualities of the spicy meatball, element of earth/fire and right hand dominance awaits for his return.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bought pants with ants in them


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Loves his antics with his ants, but frantically pants whenever they approach him.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is the owner of an Ant hospital


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a collection of dust bunnies in a jar


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

His jaw can unhinge from his skull if he needs to especially for large prey


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

wears 16 bracelets on his left wrist


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has 16 wrists


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Puts condoms on his* fingers to hand stir the mashed potatoes.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Built a trojan kat to spy on the landlord


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Keeps _several boxes_ of Trojan™️ in his bag all the time in case of emergencies


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is the symbol of the clown.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Gets quite scary during debates.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has the unsettling ability to lick his elbows


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

always forgets how many fingers he has on his hand


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is a holographic representation of a human psyche trapped inside of a super-computer floating in outerspace.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Has 5 obese cats.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a loaf instructor for obese pets


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

knits custom socks for whales and lobsters


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a rain collection in the basement


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Has a secret underground lair.


----------



## Kyabe (Mar 8, 2018)

Owns a hotel called "Hell Hotel"


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Ultimate monk and inventor of "debunk-a-skunk"; debun-ko your opponent to the logical graveyard, and spray skunk gas all over their ideas; tainting them with bunkage..... FOREVER!!!!


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Debunks his opponents, and straps them to the debunk beds, and slathers them with bunk gunk; leaving them with really rancid funk.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is looking for chubble wubble mumble berries.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is finally done with his pun; which was not fun-fun time, and is about to ask that stern, elderly gentleman if he would like a bonbon.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Changed name to Golden Arches


----------



## Mondo_Fernando (Jun 26, 2014)

Has fries with that.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Master of the chunko.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

plays hopscotch semi-professionally


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Sandwiches he prepares are sloppily done and appears hurl-worthy.


----------



## Kyabe (Mar 8, 2018)

Is a bot


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Builder of botnets.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Has a bot wife and bot children.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Is a plant whisperer.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Real name is Pat Butters


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Whispers into people's minds, and makes them cry.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is the one behind Amon's ban.


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Is a Politically charged masked vigilante known as "G".


----------



## remylemy (Apr 5, 2018)

Only posing as a blue dino but actually a blue elephant


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Played Pokemon under the bleachers


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

steals people's shoe laces when they're distracted


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a jeweled key fob


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Real name is I.P. Standing


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Stage name is Ineeda Handy


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Sells beans online at www.illegalbeans.com.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Habitually flicks her bean.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got harshly commanded to stop wearing his smelly beanie.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

likes to give people surprise haircuts while they sleep


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Always buys new clothes to avoid doing laundry.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Never makes enough pudds for the hole thread!


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Flips out when anyone asks for just a small taste of his pudding.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Goes around asking people if she can taste their pudding.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Lineage is traced back to the Annunaki.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

May have done pudd wrastles during college for beers


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Gets paid in puddings.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has One Eye on my pudds!


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Was Made In China


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Loves dancing in the dark and going barefoot on the grass, all while listening to his favorite song


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Overindulged on the curry and the naan, and now has the "number 2 blues".


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke the wind


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

scrimshaws his beans


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Always carries around a paperclip with him at all times


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sticks pins in voodoo dolls of people he hates then dresses them in barbie clothes


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Flails his arms in front of strangers upon meeting them for the first time.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Gets excited when someone sprays the hose


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Once tried to breed a dog and a cat. Oh, the humanity!


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is an interpretation of an on-going pattern.


----------



## nancygardevoir (Apr 5, 2018)

asked out a guy and he married a tree


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is the child of the ghost underlying that of claptrap and aquarius.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns an ant named Wuzzy Fuzzy


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has never baked a brownie


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Ate my brownie husband for dinner last night.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eventually had to flush a brownie husband


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Lots of childhood creativity and fruits...


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

once walked around the world subsisting on nothing but granola bars and the kindness of strangers.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Colorful nightmares, dull waking life.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Knows me well


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Had a second encounter with the meatball mustache spirit, and got gifted a meatball mini-gun (super cool!!.....).


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Lip gloss boss!


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Plans to have a party at the end of the universe; only a select few are invited


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Neo said:


> He can see every error in this code:
> 
> using SASClass;
> 
> ...


Oh, no.... A coding test. Not good at codery, so I'll probably fail.... *gulp*

Looks like C# if I remember correctly.

Um, so, no main method to run program (call methods, etc), result has to be defined as empty string or ""; I think "string" has to be capitalized (probably wrong); uh, no GeomTech boolean variable defined; if there is an SASmember class, it'd have to be saved within the same file folder as current class. And then, I'm wondering how the GeomTech variable if it where to exist, would actually change. I think that's all potential mistakes or whatever (not sure). Might also be an error for not having the keyword "static"; and to be honest, I forgot what that means, but sometimes I get errors for not including that or whatever (Newb coder, I know). Probably missed a few or whatever. *sigh*.

And then, the makeUpRumourAbout method would spit out some string accepting boolean parameter or whatever; which seems kind of weird to be honest. Maybe rename GeomTech variable to isGeomTech or whatever. And then, include a separate SASmember object named "GeomTech" or whatever, and pass it through the method. Probably wrong, but whatever.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

But anyway.... 

He's like code, but is afraid..... very, very afraid.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Heard about how great sponge cakes are, so he went to his kitchen sink and took a bite out of his sponge.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Keeps one eye on this thread at all times


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Confessed to their thefts, and revealed to the entire world what the Serbian did for the wizard of Menlo.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Saves up toots for Target


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Stole chicken nuggets from a chuckler.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Snuck a Snack at Sunday School


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Practices his cartwheels when he's bored.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has tied a bunch of frogs to her feet and now can dunk with the best of them


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has a shockingly real story for us all.... that we will NEVER forget...


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Dislikes ppl who think logically


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Mysteriously regained his blood-bending capabilities, and is back for blood.....


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Ate a bunch of pie and then just closed the door... Last night


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Tickled the chubby belly, and got kicked out of the club.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Always takes his time in a bathroom stall


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays air guitar at the urinal


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Gets free drinks in cougar town.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has an in home portapotty


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Does somersaults when angry.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Does a new yoga "The Golden Arches"


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Hurt his hand while attempting botched wing chun moves on a training dummy.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is one with the ohm of geom, and derived the underlying mechanics of Ohm's law by himself.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Doesn't know wat 2+2 is


----------



## karenw (Aug 20, 2012)

He doesnt talk much


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Punched a demon bby


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has a thing for Laurence Fishburne.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Dont give two sheets about nuthin


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Slipped and fell as he was leaving Arizona last night though he strongly denies that


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Asks for straight pickle juice at the bar


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Makes mops out of old underwear


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got his hand grabbed by a ghostly girl, and was never seen again.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a Gif


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

He loitered a few times


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

collects highway litter


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Is beautiful but very toxic.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Lost a shoe at Disney but found someone else's so all worked out


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

started a fight with Mickey and ripped off his head to the horror of small children everywhere


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Wears a Goofy costume just for fun.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Lost a hash brown out the sun roof


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

keeps 6 dwarfs in his basement just in case Snow White wants to stop by


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Put postage stamps on a watermelon


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Tickles people; mentally; but does not enjoy it.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Toenail tats


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Collects rat tails & bats


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Beats everyone in back alley Scrabble


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

has yet to beat me


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Offered a neck massage to a giraffe


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has a peg leg and a parrot but isn't a pirate


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Chubby gnomes that clap.... so many that you can't even count!!!


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Macaroni n' grief


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Lives on a diet of Macaroni & Gin


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Shines people's shoes without consent


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is a consensual shiner


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Couldn't sell shine to the sun!


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

sells moonshine


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Brought wood to Woodstock


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Tip toed across the hawt coals


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Soaked it in vinegar but the rash persists


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Betrayed the Ant kingdom


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Walked a mile in someone's shoes said "this is pretty nice"


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cheated on jelly with peanut buttah


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Once created footwear using various kinds of pastry. It didn't work out.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Drinks from sulfur springs.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Not enough B vitamins.... Not even close....


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

In his dreams, he goes around from place to place with the moonlight to guide him.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Has 16 monitors but uses only one.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has Pornhub bookmarked.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Only knows one card trick.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Stole my joke.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Has "1234" as the password for her joke safe.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Legend has it that he was banned for telling someone they only had one card trick.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is part of the rumour boomer generation.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Still thinks that shoes have souls


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Doesn't follow the most recent of woo-woo news.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is rumored to know too many rumorz


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Thought Lyft is a gym


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

keeps slim jims in his pockets at all times.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Quotes a box of oats for goats


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Uses peanuts and butter to make peanut butter.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

When one door closes, she busts it down


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Started a garage band named Claavage


----------



## screamingontheinside (Apr 9, 2018)

Heard his beans were expired;P


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Prefers expired beans.


----------



## screamingontheinside (Apr 9, 2018)

Didn't really take the red pill.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Flaps arms, almost took off once


----------



## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

Has a Nixon nose.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Buys cheese from a vending machine


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Despises his chocolate fountain.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ducks when she sees ducks


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Has staring contests with the neighbor's cat.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has done the boot scoot down at the Old Toot


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Went out and painted the town red...literally.


----------



## screamingontheinside (Apr 9, 2018)

Secretly watched him paint the town red.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Said "let's paint 'er yella!"


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is the Pipkorn Bargaler


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Answered 2+2 incorrectly


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a thing for goats of all shapes and sizes


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Loves the taste of sweat.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Stole my morphine


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

his life goal is teaching pigeons how to talk


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has read Alice in Wonderland 357 times.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is scared of floating gopherz


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is afraid of his own shadow


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Shadow boxes with a roll of tp


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Threw away a cup of bean dip


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

ate all of the chips


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is Sarah Michelle Gellar's Evil Twin.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

SamanthaStrange said:


> Is Sarah Michelle Gellar's Evil Twin.


I've been discovered! Will need to lay low
...

Is a master mod, she knows all our identities


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Contracted pudding foot from the gym


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Squeezed sweaty gym socks


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Favorite dessert is bean pudding.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Went to prom dressed as a pilgrim


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns footage of the early 1300s in HD


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Favorite snack is a stick of butter.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Inked all over the sandcastle


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Turns up nose at nose shaped cereals


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Munches on potato chips too loudly.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

SAS password is beans4Me!


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Flunked out of school, but is a master slacker hacker.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Throws candy bars in the pool and yells


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Ready to fight after one sip of martini.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Eats Cool Whip with a straw


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Burps out the rainbow.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Can break windows with just feelings


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Trolled a troll


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Powders the steering wheel


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Majored in Beanology and went on to become a beanologist.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Abuses dispensers


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Fills water balloons with pudding.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Throws away the pudd and eats the skin


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Gets excited when he drives through a puddle causing big splashes.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Picked at a pea


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Pickled by the sea.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Runs marathons in high heels.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ninjas too much :bah


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Took a roach to coachella


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Yells at the morning sun.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Bays at the moon.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Velcro worship


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Believes all the rumors that Avril Lavigne is a reptilian


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Was the original sk8ter boi


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Gives senior citizens a random boy toy, and runs for it....


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Says "Yaaas" in response to a question


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Doles out doilies


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

You can call him Tesla, Nikola; impeccably dressed, giving people a lesson in electrical nemesis, for it will be on the test.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tests his toost by licking it first


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Born partially without a tongue, and it really smells horrible in there.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Naps in a coffin


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

flies kites for a living


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Sniffs car gasoline when no one is looking


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Made up the Twerky Jerky


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ate Skittles but didn't taste the rainbow


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

knows how to build a shelter out of his encyclopedia books


----------



## karenw (Aug 20, 2012)

She ate all of my popcorn.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

thinks it was her popcorn :bah


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Popped corn


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Pipped korn


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Microwaved a block of frozen ice


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Coaches from the couch


----------



## MonkeyMan213 (Apr 11, 2018)

Is actually a can of beans in real life.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a fake MonkeyWoman


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Rubs grease to my hair every night when I'm asleep.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses the oil for cooking


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wrote SOS with sauce


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Put a bean on a flying saucer


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ When he uses coins to pay he always bites them first to make sure there not chocolate.


----------



## screamingontheinside (Apr 9, 2018)

If they turn out to be chocolate, he wants some.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

great username. Changes the locks and rearranges the furniture for people when they're away.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays with fliffies


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Only eats beans, which is why he's gassy all the time.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has used burrito supreme as fuel


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Has a pet rock named pebble...


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Pulls instead of push, is rebel


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Uses beer as a chaser.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wears beer cans to the cloob


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Sued the oreo company for his oreo addiction and won.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bounces balls off the heads of stangerssssss


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Bought real gold toilet paper.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ate dinner in the pool


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Won't eat anything that casts a shadow.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Holla'd back in the food court


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Exchanged $20 for $5.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Used a coupon at church


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Donated underwear and socks to a thrift store.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke the ride at the strip club


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Beeped at a funeral


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Mutters "woah!" while staring the face of a dog. 

The dog mutters back "woaf!".


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Does the macarooni


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Performs raccoon wedding ceremonies in the park every Sunday.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Has a fairy dungeon in her basement.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Wears a hat that says Magma


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Pops Viagra pills like candy.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ He hangs an onion off his cars rear view mirror as an air freshener.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tooted in the Benz


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Will tan on the Sun


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is one tough bun of a sitch


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has beef with a meatman


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Soaks feet in mall fountain


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Created a tiny ant hotel


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Collects used straws


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Owns too many body bags


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Would whittle wood if he could


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Dances with Barbiez


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Printer is low on boner


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Roles bread into a round ball before eating it.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is always on a hiatus


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sat in some gum and had to call the fired department to get unstuck


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Zig zagged underwater


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has zig zag underwear


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Livestreamed from a blanket fort


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Clawed a bots ankles


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Quilts on stilts


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Only thinks books are interesting if they have pictures


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

He'll throw the wrappers at you


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Banished a long lost soul


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Hugs his plump pillow.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

He's a liver! Lives it up!


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Loves Moo goo gai pan so much that he will not share.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Says Goo Goo Gah Gah to old ppl


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Thinks he is not one with the bun.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Knocked out a kangaroo with a watar gun


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Loves his chubby dumplings.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Shops at Sharts Inc


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Has a collection of green toenails


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sits on strange cars


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Drained of energy from consistently intense professional porking sessions.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Can skip thru time


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke the DVR during the 'lympics


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Yells "Hah!!! I've got you!" to random strangers, and assumes a boxing stance.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

His wardrobe only consists of flannel shirts of the same color


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Ignores the veggies in Cup Noodlez


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Doesn't eat his veggies.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

considers vegetables to have feelings too


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Gives names to the veggies he grows in his back yard.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Eats grass like a cow


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Envies the neighbors urinal


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Loves women who wear water shoes.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Made wimminz melt with his voice


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Drinks wrain wrater


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ cuts his lawn using scissors


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Clipped his toenails with a saw


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

sells lizards to minors


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

collects frogs to combat her bug problem


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Keeps house flies as pets


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Bugged a bug


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Spinnned with a fidget spinner


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Spit out the soiled Sprite


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Uses clap emojis mid sentences


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Drinks 8 Up just for one-upsmanship


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Cookerd a dukie


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Busted the DVD box set


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Discovered house-like structure patterns within the general molecular level of cheese.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Cheese is a staple food for him. His meals wouldn't be complete without cheese.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Steering wheel fungus


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Can make the perfect spaghetti sauce. This rumor remains to be proven.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Sells drugs at night clubs.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sells pudding at the racetrack


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Painted the sea white


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

claims the sky is red


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ate a chocolate Yolo


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Pouts about cake.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

his favorite sport is water polo
edit: ninja'd again lol 

she is an expert interceptor


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Favorite bar is the Stanky Jank


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Almost drowned in a chocolate fountain.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Favorite font: Chocotype


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Installed an elevator in his one story house.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bought a horn for the shower


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Wants to live on the edge so he built his house by a cliff.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

can only fall asleep while singing lullabies to herself


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Fluted on a cloud


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Counts cows in his sleep.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Sings to her toast every morning. That was for Becca, you guys are too fast!


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Would like a pudding themed bday


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Gets aroused by fire.



SamanthaStrange said:


> Sings to her toast every morning. That was for Becca, you guys are too fast!


lol! I had to edit mine because it was originally for Becca too.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Takes an inflatable shark with to the beach just to scare the kids.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays golf nudely


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Eats tick tacks in place of brushing teeth.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Yells loudly "any1 got a hanky?!?!"


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Asks for wedgies.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sells earwax online


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Reuses plastic dinnerware.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Messy eater, wears a bib every time she eats.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Jerked his meat and sold it to a farm market


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Never denies a guest, even the most ridiculous request.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Charmed a bee.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wears a charm with Bea Arthur picture


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Likes girls so much for some odd reason.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tried to mute the fridge


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Considers the strawberry filling in Poptarts as a fruit serving.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is on their fourth shot of Crisco


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has, on more than one occasion, found a spider living in his beard.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Uses dvr to only watch commercials


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Never seems to run out of toilet paper


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got munko'ed and never recovered.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Wears a T-shirt with a giant "T" on it.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

uses a 5% terminal growth rate in all of his DCFs


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has returned, and for reasons not good.


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

Knows exactly where all of the zeros lie on the critical strip of the Riemann z-fucntion but doesnt feel like telling anyone


----------



## novalax (Jun 7, 2013)

GeomTech said:


> Has returned, and for reasons not good.


I thought you were supposed to make up a rumor


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Took the LSATs from the hot tub


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Sells pudding skin singles on Ebay.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Showed the grill on MySpace


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Kills butterflies for fun.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Says "wont you visit my lint museum?"


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Wears an apron while grocery shopping.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is looking forward to Hulucon


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Sells saltwater to tourists.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Sued her mom for not paying her college tuition.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Tried to steal a monkey from the zoo.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Got a joob at Jiffy Loob


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Killed a whale to make sushi out of it.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Keeps goldfish crackers in a fishbowl.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has a fish phobia.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays a mean Bose


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Once sang to a frog.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Threw toast at the neighbors


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Found a ball of worms and kept it.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ordered one Frinch fri to go


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Drank a shamrock shake out of a shoe.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Invented glow in the dark toilet paper


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Does her makeup to do the dishes.

*his


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Got ninjad in the cosmetic section


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Got cosmetics in the ninja section.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

only has half a face.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Makes Top Ramen cocktails


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Travels to Antarctica frequently to stock up on ice for his sodas.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

squashes people's lunches for them to make it easier to digest


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Some people say he's part man, part machine.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Borrowed someones nose hair trimmer


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has begun archiving the _entire_ internet


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke SAS from twerking on it


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Still hasn't fixed his broken code. We're waiting here.....


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

just decides to grade people's papers and leave comments like "unacceptable" and "you can't be serious."


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Screams "banned" every time someone says "good morning" to him.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has banning dreams


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Banned from entering other people's dreams; for he is confronted with a locked door that says "Taking a dump here, so screw off!" every time he tries to enter. No matter how hard he kicks it or conjures weapons to destroy the door; it budges / opens not.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sees the sign for restroom; goes in and takes a nap.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Oatmeal fetishist


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Owns a piece of the Brooklyn Bridge.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Year old ham is his only best friend.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Scam artist that scams other scam artists.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Collects buttons, has thousands of them.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Wrote a cookbook featuring 150 Spam recipes.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Strawberry yogurt + peach ice cream.... So, so much of it....


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Prefers fried fruits.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Plans to give out canned sardines this coming Halloween instead of sweets


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Beer can castler


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Snacks on lemons.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wears garden hosery


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Uncovered the entrance to a cursed tomb in his backyard not too long ago 

Sent from my iPhone Xperia XL S9 Plus Galaxy mini Pro GeForce GTX 12.9" SE using Tapatalk


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Created the Tapatalk app, just so he could cheat at SAS games.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Cheats at chaase and craackers


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

consumes large amounts of sawdust; produces wooden sculptures for sale in art galleries and auction houses


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Shoots crumbs out of a straw


----------



## Anjubatus (Apr 19, 2018)

hacks games and sells them


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has never received a YOLO crake yet


----------



## onepiecefreak16 (Apr 16, 2018)

Lives in a box on a rollercoaster


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Looks at lint with a microscope


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Has sappy hands.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

is secretly a pop star from Sweden


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Keeps a lucky crouton


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Wrestled with a bear for fun.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Wandered into Walmart, stayed for 5 straight days.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Has secret ties to the Russian mafia.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Couldn't find the way out in Ikea.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Deep fries pineapples just for fun.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Collects rollie pollies.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Built a dollhouse out of Twizzlers.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Downloaded a portal to H E double hockysticks


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Stole bowling shoes.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Whipped out the Cool Whip while driving the whip


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Got lost in his house.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Serves candy corn as a vegetable substitute.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wondered out loud if camels have toes


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Choked on a lemon drop.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Stole the papper shaker, left the silt


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got splattered with key lime pie.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Punched a minister because the sermon was too long.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Chains people who disagrees with him in his basement. Claims the howls of despair are just of his cat giving birth.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Knits baby booties for kittens.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sends emails back and forth with Emily Email


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is an expert at making radish roses.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Puts leaves in a paper shredder for mulch


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Plans on becoming an _alebrije_ in the spirit world


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

believes people catapults would solve the traffic and pollution problems in congested cities


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Plucks the plump chuckles.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Is neither a Geom nor a Tech


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is actually Cletus Kasady AKA Carnage from Earth-616.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Tried to ride his dog.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Anger > Fear quotient; thus = Red Lantern Corp member.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Ate Tide detergent pods for youtube likes.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Voracious guzzler of green tea & peas.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Sold his soul for spam.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Destroyed the Baklava platter, and got a tummy ache.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Drove the bus right to the jank yard


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is reaching painfully for that last daifuku mochi, but instead, strains too hard, rips a big one, and falls asleep thereafter.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Punched a mime.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Mixed mustard and milk: milkstard


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is completely comfortable carrying his man purse


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tripped over a Coca Cola and swore real loud


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Once stalked the wrong person.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Loves to freeze soda before eating it


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has a bad habit of sticking his tongue out at police officers and very large people


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Polices the large people who hate having others stick their tongues out at them.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Makes chocolate raw egg yolk shakes in the mornings.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Aint never set a clock in her life


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Once googled what a U turn is.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Took the drive thru sign literally


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

his life is directed by David Lynch


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Woke up at 6AM


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Peeled himself a piece of toost


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Toasted himself a piece of banana peel.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Shows up drunk at the library.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Puts a small dot on his face using a marker and pretends it's a real mole


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Learned earth-bending from the badger moles.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Has 10 kids for tax benefits.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Will soon make up a rumor about someone


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Goes to bed wearing a cape


----------



## FedericoC (Feb 12, 2018)

likes tacos with hot sauce


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Slipped on hot sauce and fell face-first into delicious tacos.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Drinks hot sauce to wake up in the morning.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got silenced by the hot sauce sandwiches.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Drowned in hot sauce.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got tee-hee'd and caught a really bad case of the tickle giggles. I don't think she will ever recover....


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Made a girl cry just so he could hug her.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Hugged a bag of cheese curls


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has a habit of doing curls with cheese weights... stinky ones at that!


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Brings a pocket knife to church


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is creeped out by church.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

One day his fridge was empty so he fried up his goldfish.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Goldfish cracks on ice cream sundae


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Obsessed with bean dip.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Dips the obsession into the bean.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Gangles over the octo-dopples.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Gets distracted by moles.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Constantly wears a superhero costume underneath her clothes when going out in case of emergencies


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Coddled a cuke


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Found the answers to the test by sneaking into the "Teachers Only" room.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Steps on his cat's tail for fun.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Laughs at sushi.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Thought wasabi was avocado and ate the whole thing.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Makes really good Okonomiyaki.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Chases honeybees away from his garden.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Burned the naan so badly that we couldn't eat it.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Thinks kimchi is primarily made up of fermented animal innards


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

thinks styrofoam packing peanuts taste just fine with some nacho cheese flavoring


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Went on a water fasting diet for a week and hallucinated Jesus.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

jiggles the handle an awkward amount of times


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Complains about people breathing his air.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

tells the bartender his booze just aint good nuff


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Keeps all the booze in the attic that's why he never let's anyone up there


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Keeps bans in the basement.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

sometimes gets a case of the giggs


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has a mini fridge in his bathroom.


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Has flushed herself down the toilet before.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Glares at the sun.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

streams rap muzic at cherch


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Farts in public.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

built a Lady HaHa shrine in the attic


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Demands chicken blood sacrifice every full moon


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

says "go down to ice machine, dawg, and get me some cubes"


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Finally scratched his pubes once he installed Qubes OS.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Looks very young for his age; no facial hair, etc.


----------



## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Ran into problems with local police. Got caught running an illegal bee pelt fur coat operation. Reputedly slaughtered and skinned over 3 billion bees.


----------



## Nekobasu (Apr 22, 2018)

Watches My Little Pony in his underwear while eating Cheetos.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Had soggy cheetos and potato chip cereal for um... brunch.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

thought he was in a driverless car, but turns out he was wrong


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is an aspiring superhero in his town


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got debunked, and completely lost it....


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is trapped on the island from Lost.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Did loaf position on the diving board


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Does kegel exercises 5 times a day


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Was once an extra in a Sponge Bob cartoon.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Tripped over an ant.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sat on a loaf of bread and said "who dat?"


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Saw himself naked once.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Bowled a perfect game while constipated


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has this tendency to throw peanuts at people instead of eating them (the peanuts)


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Choked on a chuckle.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Squeegeeman


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Barney's barrel of laughs arouses his curiosity.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a "Bat cave" of his own


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Over-dosed on creativity, but has forgone the concrete.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Holds the key for near light speed travel in his brain. He hasn't just figured out the right equation for it yet.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Already solved the problem of surpassing the alleged light-speed limit within his subconscious, which manifested as a very cryptic dream, and is currently undergoing hypnotherapy to unravel further details.


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Has seen a white hole, the one that theoretical physics talks about.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Plays cosmic roulette, and well...


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Charges a convenience fee when opening doors for ladies.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Installed hidden trap doors as a quicker way to get between floors than taking the stairs


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Stalks his cat.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

offers to go on vacation with people for a reasonable price


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Has always wanted to live in an igloo on Pluto.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Got drunk off of non-alcoholic beer.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Tripped over the bunny, and found it funny.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Frowns upon people who drink decaf coffee, like, what's the point?


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is 2.555555555 faced


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has tasted human flesh


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Got so tanned people often mistake him for a leather couch.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Channeled all of her anger into a single lethal meatball.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

will probably end up fairly drunk and hitting on the cute girl with a tattoo of Ferdinand on her chest later tonight.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

^LOL!!! 

Thinks of what may lie beyond the conceptual.


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Buys chocolate bars so he can put the wrappers in a display in his chocolate bar wrapper collection


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Scrambled his ego.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Tried having dreadlocks once but stopped when he found out his hair became a home to a family of mice


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Ugh... What a disgusting sight... And dreadlocks = purely repulsive *vomits* 

Anyway... He spends his days poking the chubby tummies of mice.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Um, wat? Gah... Nevermind. 

Uh, he spends his days trapped in the giggly piggly.

He took it away... *sigh* Oh, well.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

GeomTech said:


> Ugh... What a disgusting sight... And dreadlocks = purely repulsive *vomits*


:rofl I just found this to be immensely hilarious!


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Glazes his pumpkin stache.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

lives downwind from a french perfume company


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

hides 3 goblins under the couch


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Stole all the spinach. Twistix wanted it for her pizza, you thief!


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Made an exercise DVD "How To Literally Laugh Your ****ing *** Off"


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

has a talent for braiding his eyebrows


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Toenail piercings


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

still wearing last year's summer fashions despite the gossip


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

owns a badly-dressed-people list


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

feeds starving models her bread as part of her humanitarian efforts


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Left the cake out in the rain


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Ate it anyway.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Fell rear-first on the cake, but no one laughed. Instead, they all surrounded her, getting closer and closer... So, so close....


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

popped out of cakes while singing Happy Birthday and doing a little strip teasing until he put half of the grandmothers into cardiac arrest at the nursing home one fateful evening


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Pied everyone at the birthday party and ran...


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Enjoyed stereochemistry a little too much


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Flunked out of university, but rebounded by creating a sketchy yet functional robo-suit from scratch.


----------



## Harlin (Apr 6, 2018)

has had several breast augmentations


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Didn't finish their chicken breast dinner.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is also known as Uncle Acid


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Participates in the yearly nude gardening event.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Sanitizes pocket change


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

funnynihilist said:


> Sanitizes pocket change


Thats true.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Rebootplease said:


> Thats true.


Probably not a bad idea actually lol

Prefers music to be played backwards


----------



## Harlin (Apr 6, 2018)

has a choad


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays Highway To Hell every Christmas eve


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Stares at walls to see through them


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

can't stop looking at the oxygen


----------



## Harlin (Apr 6, 2018)

snorts pixy stix


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tips the bartender with Almond Joys


----------



## Harlin (Apr 6, 2018)

His pacifier was made of asbestos


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Was the stunt double for invisible man


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke bad, fixed it, then it broke again


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has a really cool group of guys he calls his S.W.A.T (Super Whacky Anal Taskforce) team squadron. Every night, they dress up, and go out; pretend their guns are their hands, and pretend to shoot random strangers.


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Is actually the mysterious Euclid that wrote his Elements.


----------



## Harlin (Apr 6, 2018)

Was cursed by Aphrodite to always be beautiful


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tried to use a crayoned coupon at Applebee's


----------



## Harlin (Apr 6, 2018)

would **** anything that calls him daddy


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Breathed schnapps breath on the Walmart greeter


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

So mean, that the people he scathingly rebukes fall to the floor in pain.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Strikes matches as a hobby


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is part of the celibate bean society


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Dumps pixie sticks into expensive wines


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has this tendency to show off how many burpees he can do when he's really drunk at the beach


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Sleeps in a pineapple shaped bed.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wrote a song about brownies


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Allergic to water.


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Quadruple knots her shoes


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a pocket universe in their bedroom


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Keeps telling me 1+1=fish


----------



## karenw (Aug 20, 2012)

Needs a new Computer


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Her computer runs on leprechaun blood and unicorn tears


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Lied about his cupcake making prowess


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Harmony of geometry is with him.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is developing a secret formula that destroys emotions


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

:bah Is super intuitive and is very in-touch with their feelings (I suck at this so much).


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Busted a tampon machine back in 2007


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Munko munching sessions... very much so.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Grilled a dolla bill by accidento


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Put monster truck tires on his smart car


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Believes eye implants are the future of personal computing


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Thinks trans-humanism isn't purely bunk.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Is a closet party animal


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Ate a Big Mac for breakfast.


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Is in love with me.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is in love with _me_.


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Is in love with discarded chicken wing bones.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is full of 'bah'


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

His favorite season is Christmas because he gets to say 'Bah! Humbug' without getting judged


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Wishes for a hamburger as soon as he visits hamburg.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has had egyptian potato chips.


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Started a rock war with the neighbor's kid.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Makes music playing in a rubber band


----------



## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

Dated the preacher's daughter, and lived to write a song about it.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Made a candy bar omelette


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Likes to draw classic paintings on the beach at 5.50 am on a random day every 2 years


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Tried to start a fight with my angry cupcake avatar.


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Already has started a fight with my Gothic cupcakes! :b


----------



## SPMelly (Jul 29, 2016)

Above user likes to stick their finger up their arse and smell the aftermath

Sent from my Phone using Tapatalk


----------



## CWe (Mar 7, 2010)

Below user likes to make out with frogs


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Tried to plant jelly beans.


----------



## Gothic Cupcakes (Mar 24, 2015)

Actually has 1,101 posts


----------



## Wanderlust26 (Oct 26, 2016)

Yells at the sky when it gets cloudy.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Had cloudy urine and was certainly bothered, went to the kitchen and drank a bunch of water.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

talks in his sleep to other people talking in their sleep


----------



## karenw (Aug 20, 2012)

Looks confused


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Gave the neighbor's wife a stern look


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Something weird is going on with him... .very strange happenings indeed.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has been attempting to clone himself in their basement for the past 6 years


----------



## Protozoan (May 26, 2014)

Caught confessing sins to a barbie doll.


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Earns money from the sperm bank when times are tough and when times are not so tough.


----------



## Lemonadebaby (May 8, 2018)

At night he turns into a bee and then sleeps in a hive


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Got any grapes?


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got groped by a grape.


----------



## Querh (Apr 20, 2017)

Yeah just did your sister in that vineyard you dont own.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has the odd ability to have intercourse with non-existent instances of the female kind.


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Makes money by puking on a canvass, smearing it around and selling it.


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Says shes a man but is really a women . Liiier.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sometimes wears pants when he goes out to eat


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Wears fancy dresses on Tuesday nights.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Comes from a realm where it's perfectly legal to eat people


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Pinched the puffin by thinking of the conceptual hinges of existence.


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

There's a bite taken out of the matrix and it is from him.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Over-reliant on a fearful body that hopes itself to be incorrect.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

claims to be the illegitimate child of Tom Hanks and Princess Di


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Too much canday


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Lives in a house made out of newspapers.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Taco tents for sale!


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Puts milk and cream in coffees.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got attacked by skewl ghouls.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is an A.I. from another galaxy


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Can make holographic flowers appear in her hair whenever she fancies it


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is afraid to challenge me.... to a dewl! *runs*


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Loves to bend the roolz like he does with the non-existent spewns.


----------



## Kitty196 (Aug 3, 2017)

They’re secretly made of sponge


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Giggled over the gummies.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

It is said that he met John Titor face-to-face.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

collects retro cereal boxes


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

He multiplies when he gets splashed with water


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Loves getting licked by the alluring flame.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is a pro rubix cube solver


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

So cool, plays pool, from a stool, after school, and that makes the bois drool,


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Has a mysterious ability to attract bois to his yard


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

finds his groceries at yard sales


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Beeps at sheep as they creep toward the creek


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

practices medicine with a fishing license


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

His ref has never been devoid of any alcoholic beverages since 2008


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Believes that the word cannot be heard.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

believes the bird is the word


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Is gay, meaning happy.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is a little eggy


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

frequently gets frustrated with towels


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Loves greeting new SASers once in a while.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has a drawer for left socks and another for right socks


----------



## 0Kelly0 (Feb 24, 2018)

Doesn't know how to read.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

invented the inverted umbrella as an eco-friendly way to get a shower


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Once made a compass out of a toothpick and nose hairs


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

^Figured out how to grow birds from roots.



Neo said:


> amorphophallus titanum


Googling that is going to give me nightmares tonight. *shudder shudder*


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

He sees dreams that foretell the future


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Master of tooting the rear horn.


----------



## Rebootplease (Dec 5, 2017)

Oils up his gears waaaayyyyy too much


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is an expert falconer


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Found a magic lamp with an actual genie within. Wasted his first wish (out of 3) by wishing unlimited wishes because that was against the genie's wishing policy.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Ice missile spear is his weapon of choice; along with his igloo shield form from his legendary ice-bending abilities.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

regrettably skipped the safety training video to watch cats staring at laser pointers


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Threw away his disk launcher in exchange for a pulse staff.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Munches on data


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

draws caricatures of people's cats driving their cars


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Loves sprinkling pepper to sleeping people's faces, pretending they're a fairy


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Likes a good rock in his shoe


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

He wears a big clock on his chest as a necklace.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Would very much like to kick a piglet at least once, but won't because she knows society frowns upon that practice


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Turns into a cow after eating a particularly filling meal.


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Once stole the Declaration of Independence for a non-existent treasure


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Is a hoarder and was even on TV show.


----------



## irum (Oct 27, 2016)

Has an alien lover


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

did Naked and Afraid on the Moon


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Likes to wear a beret from time to time and pretend he's french


----------



## Mabel Pines (Mar 19, 2018)

Likes to do the People's Eyebrow.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

When awakened, scary things start to happen.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Once tried to sell a used condom on ebay.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

usually answers the door in his underwear unless you catch him on laundry day


----------



## Tealing (May 30, 2018)

Fancies himself an astonishing cook, refusing to follow any instructions on the packaging.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Did squats at home and spilled "teh guts" while squatting down.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Using the Lamaze method to get in shape at the gym despite the stares


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Just loves staring out the window with his cat sometimes


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

strongly believes that champagne bottles contain souls


----------



## sad1231234 (Jul 10, 2016)

Strongly believes that champange bottles dont contain souls


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

sells priceless things at reasonable prices


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Pushes the tip-toers into kegs.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Has caught every water Pokemon


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Turns into a blood sucking bat at night.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is currently setting off bottle rockets to celebrate American independence


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Stole 3 days worth of SAS posts.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is not allowed on the Google cloud


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Kicked a rainbow for being too pretty.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

googled his name and ended up banned


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Got ninja'd by a faerie.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

douses people in mind-altering pixie dust


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Team chucklepuff to the xtreme!


----------



## BeautyandRage (Jul 2, 2018)

Probably wears diapers to sleep


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

^Lol!

Has a _really_ scary laugh.


----------



## BeamingNow (Jun 12, 2018)

Makes handcrafted voodoo-dolls of every SAS member


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Makes a mean potato pie, and flaps his arms when he's done making it.


----------



## Arthur Pendragon (Mar 17, 2013)

Is actually technophobic.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

does aerobics in clothes two sizes too small


----------



## girlyone1 (Jan 20, 2012)

Watches them do aerobics in clothes too small and enjoys it.


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Fries hamsters for lunch.


----------



## fantaspaceunicornz (Jun 30, 2018)

Steals all the toilet paper rolls whole from every restaurant bathroom they've been in.


----------



## greentea33 (Mar 4, 2014)

Is a hamster.


----------



## girlyone1 (Jan 20, 2012)

Has a mural of a hamster


----------



## fantaspaceunicornz (Jun 30, 2018)

Eats pineapple with pizza on it.


----------



## Arthur Pendragon (Mar 17, 2013)

Eats apples with pine seeds and calls them pineapples.


----------



## BAH (Feb 12, 2012)

Is a weenie


----------



## Eleonora91 (Aug 3, 2018)

Slapped an elderly woman


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

speaks with an Italian accent and is completely indifferent to fashion


----------



## Eleonora91 (Aug 3, 2018)

Wears crocs with socks.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has combined meditative yoga with smashing stuff in the name of stress therapy


----------



## Alpha Tauri (Mar 19, 2017)

Bakes at least 5 pies a day all for himself


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

^ Lol! Bakeroo! 

Narrowly escaped the wrath of the banqueen by mesmerizing her with his perfect squat form.


----------



## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

Fell into the Ocean.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

is either Santa Claus or the guy that steals people's socks out of washing machines


----------



## dc9 (Jun 19, 2018)

farfeg has secret funds in off-short accounts and is incredibly rich


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is actually a wealthy men's fashion designer living in Dubai


----------



## stratsp (Jul 30, 2018)

Was probed by aliens


----------



## T-Bone (Oct 1, 2010)

has touched a koala inappropriately


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Actually prefers ribeyes.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is a human in wolf's clothing


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a moonman in human clothing


----------



## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Walks around wearing a giant bear costume. Lol.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Thinks this song goes on too long


----------



## Fever Dream (Aug 18, 2015)

Is an actual bear dressed as a man, diguised as a bear.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Works as a stunt guy for all the top puppets.


----------



## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Is secretly a big scary MS paint monster, lol.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

ate all the cookies in the cookie jar.


----------



## BeamingNow (Jun 12, 2018)

Swapped identities with Selena Gomez years ago, but no one suspects anything


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Discovered a secret, has now mysteriously vanished.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has never had a nice, refreshing shandy, EVER!


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Secretly discovered a shandy lake where they now reside.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is a very bada** vampire slayer


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Knows what you did last summer


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

steals other people's dirty clothes just so she can wash them and later return them secretly


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Has hitchhiked through the galaxy


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

will be marrying on may the 4th


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Has hired top piñata makers to create a 4ft vampire-stormtrooper piñata for May the 4th :O


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

sips tequila under palm trees critiquing vampire slaying


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

whoops, wrong person. did some strange things at band camp one time

is still holding a grudge with Emily Deschanel


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

did some strange things with Stifler’s mom


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

giggles every time she sees an apple pie


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

did not know the webcam was on and did their sexy dance


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

seems like she might be jealous of my dance moves


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Discovered who the guy in the Evolution of Dance video is! :O


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is somehow using voodoo to make my internet slow


----------



## lackofflife (Mar 24, 2015)

plays pubg with bears


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

brings his pet bear to the pub with him


----------



## Stillaloner (Sep 11, 2018)

Was gonna jump but realized it wasnt high enough.


----------



## Stillaloner (Sep 11, 2018)

That was dark and not funny sorry .


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

all of the walls in their house are covered with pictures of goats

(also you are forgiven)


----------



## BeamingNow (Jun 12, 2018)

Has successfully started five different cults


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

has joined all of those cults just because he was bored


----------



## BeamingNow (Jun 12, 2018)

Has a rare disorder that causes her to constantly rub her hands together and laugh maniacally


----------



## kikoni (Sep 10, 2018)

Has a rare disorder that causes him to laugh maniacally whenever the sun sets


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

goes to public laundry rooms just to stare at the washing machines


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

Collects and smells used socks


----------



## Blue Dino (Aug 17, 2013)

Uses exactly 3 squares of toilet paper to wipe his butt, no more and no less.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

knows everything about peanut butter


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Once tried to put an egg back in the shell.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

He'll toot at you!


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is a forest barn dwarf that can shapeshift into different animals. You can identify him by strange offers of alcoholic beverages (like a shandy), breath mints, nuts, or pieces of food (lasgna). Funny yet nihilistic.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Went to the store looking for blinker fluid for her car


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

He'll lick your eyebrows


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

That horse will lick anywhere you put cream on


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Keeps onion peels in a sock wrapped around his neck when he has a sore throat.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Created a web of fries


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Tries to sell spider webs as artwork.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

"Sword" isn't as long as he says.


----------



## Chevy396 (Jul 10, 2017)

Has dreams about a threesome with Trump and Hillary.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Started garage band "The Foreskins"


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Gives his horse LSD


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a pet noodle named Limply


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Eats spaghetti through his nose


----------



## Eleonora91 (Aug 3, 2018)

Has an evil gnome living under his desk


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Got grumpy over a grommet


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Has a suit of bubble wrap for when he goes out in public.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Goes around popping peoples bubble wrap suits with a fork.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Stirs up drama at the farmer market


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Tramples all his guests


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a she-whizz


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Enjoys cepacol lozenges as candy even though he doesn't have a sore throat


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is actually the spirit of Excaliber itself and is still waiting to be found


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Plays the air lute in their underwear


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Uses socks as gloves for everything


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Created Reddit clone, Greendit


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Is still using Windows 98


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Typed in "cornhub" by mistake and ordered a bushel of corns


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is trying to establish views for his Cornhub creation


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Owns a chain of pet stores.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ When the power is out he gets his electricity from hamsters running on wheels.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Works for ShinRa electric company


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Banqueen squats.... all day all night for a robust posterior.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Favorite past time is dumpster diving


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Algebra gave this guy horrible nightmares during his time in skoowell.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Rejected for blandness.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Flarted excessively with the spooky harpies and got burned...... really, REALLY badly.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Was only allowed fruit and veggies for trick or treating because chocolate makes him quite gassy.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

microwaves his socks in winter


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Looking forward to Tootin Tuesday


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Plans to dress up as a Disney princess for trick or treating.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

talks to his image in the mirror backwards


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Digs the scrooge..... very, very deeply.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Has an obsession that everything needs to be neo-green.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is a legal street racer and only races at the lawful speed limit


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ She believes elephants in the wild survive by eating only peanuts.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Uses peanut butter face mask treatments at least twice a week.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Wears sweaters made from his own cut hair.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Has interesting remedies for his particularly severe case of hyperhidrosis.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ Uses dish soap when he takes a shower.


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Uses a toy sword


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

Has never even seen dragon ball z


----------



## Etschludigung (Oct 13, 2018)

it´s a fan of soccer


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

thinks the card game rummy is called brummy and wonders why his friends don't come to the brummy games


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Drank too much brummy last nite


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

^ uses a cooking pot as a bicycle helmet.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Gets an adrenaline rush by chasing squirrels.


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Hatched Godzilla from an little o'l egg. 

Sent from my LG-H343 using Tapatalk


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Made a gozilla omelette


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Threw a banana peel at a monkey.


----------



## BeamingNow (Jun 12, 2018)

Teaches monkeys how to responsibly dispose of their banana peels.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Always sleeps at his desk.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

prefers raw meat and advocates vegetable and plant rights


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Secretly brought Kramer Kenny Rogers Roast while he was staying in Jerry’s apartment.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has an entire room full of Mr Marbles dolls.


----------



## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

Is really a witch and is controlling president donald trump using a voodoo doll


----------



## Fever Dream (Aug 18, 2015)

Is in fact, a very joyful reaper.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Once called his neighbors and asked them if their refrigerator was running.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Once ran over his neighbor's refrigerator with a monster truck.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Knocks on restroom door while date is in there every two minutes asking if everything is going ok


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

After date comes back from restroom he asks if "everything came out alright."


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

started a classic swinging 60's metal cover band called The Wolfpack.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

^ gasp! You know my hamsters name was Mr. Cheerio!

Dances in his socks to kidz bop because the clean versions of popular hit songs are his jam


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Invented something called Twytarts. :lol


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

_T_T that was a secret. Besides how was I supposed to know you didn't like tarts  _

Hands out trick cupcakes on halloween...the trick is bad news if you eat them :afr


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Is a vampire and loves Halloween.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is not a vampire, but likes to bite anyway.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

provides packets of blood for little vamp kids in her neighbourhood come halloween


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Named their jack-o'-lantern "Wheaf"


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Broke into my house to steal rice krispies treats.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

has adopted 98 crickets


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Adopted all the members of the 90s boy band 98 Degrees


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Adopted the backstreet boys.


----------



## Fever Dream (Aug 18, 2015)

Will be handing out last years candy canes as Halloween candy this year.


----------



## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

Likes to throw wooden barrels at people while listening to jungle music


----------



## Fever Dream (Aug 18, 2015)

Has been shirking his grim reaper duties as of late.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

keeper of the codes to the secret weather control machine


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

believes I am the real Taylor Swift and has been thread stalking for autographs


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Likes to shake, shake, shake late at night.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is featured in a Taylor Swift song, you heartbreaker.


----------



## Fever Dream (Aug 18, 2015)

Laces her cupcakes with fairy dust.


----------



## BeamingNow (Jun 12, 2018)

Holds the position of “Arts and Crafts organizer” in his local street gang


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Is beaming with universal love energy


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Is the love guru


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Justifies her street racing habit as she's Princess Daisy and the world is her mario kart


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Has a blank space baby and she’ll write your name.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

She'll love you like a love song baby


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

She’s feeling 22


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Is a secret mermaid superhero


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Discovered my secret mermaidness when he went skinny dipping in the ocean that one time


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

had to banish suchness for discovering her secret and has assumed his identity in the forum


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Apparently in love.....with the Cookie Monster?


----------



## blue2 (May 20, 2013)

Once wore a dinosaur costumn to a party that said "dress casual"


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has seen Star Wars 368 times.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Sent 200 rats and a "happy halloween" card to my house.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Thinks I'm the Blair Witch.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Tried to burn me at the stake. :shock


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is refusing to cook anything


----------



## BeamingNow (Jun 12, 2018)

Is currently on step 4 of her 10 step plan to take over SAS.


----------



## Meisha12 (Oct 20, 2018)

Is secretly a beanbag chair.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is secretly a male


----------



## Meisha12 (Oct 20, 2018)

Is secretly still a caterpillar.


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Is secretly still in Kirby's Dream Land


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is secretly still in the Room


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

tied some geese to his steering wheel in case he wants to honk at somebody


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has a "honk if you love faeries" bumper sticker.


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Sends new SAS members a free get out of anxiety card.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Is currently wallowing in butter.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is waffling without butter


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

chocolate dipped spiders are a delicacy for him


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Wears a belt made of Twizzlers.


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Loves foods with plenty of holes.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Goes to Whole Foods for food with holes 
@Neo 
noooooooo


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Got in a whole lot of trouble in Whole Foods.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Is a bargain bin shopper.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

doesn't understand the greatness of a bargain bin dive


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Dove into a pool of chocolate.


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

Headbutted a cookie and then stomped on it


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Got his lucky break when he spotted the smashed cookie, and made it his dinner. Gravel bits and pebble pieces, along with bathroom boot marks... yum yum!


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

training for the national tap dancing and cupcake bake-off combo national championships


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Asked a cupcake for a lap dance.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

told the universe to make it's own damn grilled cheese!


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

thinks the dallas cowboy cheerleaders should put some clothes on


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has a cat named Tabitha.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

secretly brews beer in the laundry room


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

hides people's keys but always says you're really cold when they search for them


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Keeps his spare keys in the freezer.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Keeps hiding my phone in the snow


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Put her phone in the oven at 350 degrees because it was cold from being in the snow.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

banned for melting my ice sculpture of man contemplating what he wants on his pizza


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Bans people in the rumor thread.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Told me it was fine to thaw my phone in the oven :bah


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Tried to make cookies in the microwave.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Told me the microwave cookie method was the same as the easy bake oven. 



It’s not.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Ate easy bake oven brownie mix from 1988.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

was nearly arrested for stealing a giant cookie at the food court but ate the evidence


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

was the cop that tried arresting her and having her stomach x-rayed for evidence but got denied by the higher ups


----------



## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

was one of the higher-ups that orchestrated the arrest in the first place, bwahaha


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Was the hacker that blocked the security footage of the theft that took place in exchange for free cookies for life


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

says "yipeeee" when hitting the gas


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Is actually an alluring merman who drags his finds into the sea, never to return.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is too close of friends with the blue eyed elmo


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Still keeps yelling PIVOT!


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

plays center for the Lakers despite being under 7 feet tall


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Buys CO2 canisters and releases them into the air because he's cold all the time and wants the earth to get warmer.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Tried to give the earth a cold shower.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Saves Cicada shells to put into her tuna salad for added crunch.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Gets excited over nail clippers.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Clips her nails with rocks.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Keeps on rockin' in the free world.


----------



## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Exchanges the cookies she steals with cupcakes, thinking doing so means she isn't eating stolen items anymore.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Steals eggs from chickens while they're sleeping.


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Taught the Road Runner how to run.


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

Has experienced the same but with wet dreams


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

had a premonition that I was going to eat all his Xmas cookies


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Lives in a gingerbread house.


----------



## iAmCodeMonkey (May 23, 2010)

Is a beautiful gingerbread queen!


----------



## Memories of Silence (May 15, 2015)

Lives in a tree.


----------



## anonymoususer2 (Feb 13, 2018)

Lives In a Forest


----------



## GeomTech (Sep 29, 2015)

Poked around on the dank web, and liked what he saw.


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

He has to put deodorant on his feet.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Is the famous Alaskan Pirate in search of frozen treasure


----------



## Fever Dream (Aug 18, 2015)

Collects a lock of hair from everyone she meets.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

colors his hair daily to match his shoes


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

uses old newspapers to wrap christmas presents for everyone


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

his New Year's resolution this year involves helping other people break their resolutions


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Blows bubbles through a staw while drinking milk.


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Dances with flowers because it’s fun


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Flirts with the ladies at his local grocery store.


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Pervs at the guys at her local grocery store


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Sleeps naked with no blanket>: )


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Sleeps in a wedding dress.


----------



## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

Attracts gingerbread men with stocking fetish.


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Loves poking people. That is how they gained their username.

_ Tapatalk, the APP I been pronouncing as "Tap-Ah-Talk"_


----------



## nosystemd (Dec 14, 2018)

she used to have an unlicensed side business selling hedgehogs-- she had to quit though because she was allergic. a pensioner from minnesota agreed to find homes for the rest.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Found homes for hedgehogs in Minnesota.


----------



## nosystemd (Dec 14, 2018)

Ekardy said:


> Found homes for hedgehogs in Minnesota.


i actually taught them all to hum taylor swift songs, and im presently fighting off ascap-- not to be confused with the aspca, who raised an eyebrow but ultimately thought it was cute.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

sings in code and speaks in mouse clicks


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Does a Tom and Jerry style Christmas caroling.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

does Selena-grams for Selena Gomez fans over the holidays


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Joins me in the Selenagrams as Taylor for the Selena Gomez-Taylor Swift fans of the world.


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Goes to comicons dressed as Faith the vampire slayer every year


----------



## RyanIsNerdy (Apr 20, 2017)

Drunkenly fights crime in her underwear; thinks her superheroine name is WorldStar because that's what the public she defends yells when they see her.


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Helps Big Foot file his taxes.

_Sent from Daft Punk who is playing at my house using Tapatalk_


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Is not really that much fun.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Spent the last 2 months in the SAS spa getting mani-pedis.


----------



## Suchness (Aug 13, 2011)

Spends time in her garden trying to communicate with fairies.


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Dances with Crazy Frog at his local supermarket.

_Sent from Daft Punk who is playing at my house using Tapatalk_


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Collects different varieties of cereal


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has started an online petition to get rid of the internet by giving him global mod powers to ban absolutely everyone


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Invented the internet.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tastes like internet after a rain


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

Tastes different after consuming a lot of pineapple


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Wore a "Jesus take the cheese wheel" on a Wisconsin cheesery tour


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

is head of the tic tac and certs alliance. They meet every Tuesday in the Starbucks inside the local grocery store.


----------



## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

She once dated a sasquatch.


----------



## Scaptain (Aug 12, 2016)

Has staring contests with himself in the mirror every other day.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a Tcaptain on the weekends


----------



## exceptionalfool (Nov 30, 2018)

Dines and dances with a demonically possessed antique dress form up in the attic.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Tasted tree bark in front of the girls and said "smooooooth"


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Uses a golf club as a cane.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Cleans the grout with Coca Cola


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has a fridge full of coca colon.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Took a case of coca colon to Cancun


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Took a can of Pepsi to Pensacola.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ate pimento loaf in Sacramento (loaf)


----------



## 0589471 (Apr 21, 2012)

Lost all of the starburst in Amherst


----------



## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

She once shot down a UFO. It was a skeet shooting accident.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Called is sick and gave the reason as "a case of the skeets"


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Named his right thumb skeeter.


----------



## Ekardy (Jul 26, 2018)

Her favorite superhero is Quailman.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

attracts a lot of balloons with her electric personality


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Throws water balloons at random strangers.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Stole @Karsten 's David Hasselhoff poster.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

Still has all her Dawson Creek memorabilia proudly displayed


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has the Saved by the Bell theme song as his ringtone.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a mason jar labeled simply "toenail"


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

keeps a large jar of what everybody hopes is pickle juice in his fridge


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Once tried to pickle an ice cream sandwich.


----------



## Cletis (Oct 10, 2011)

Is so strange even strangers think she's strange.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Never seems to have all the deetz


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Wrote Trump a fan letter.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Has a Trump ceiling fan


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Threw spaghetti at the ceiling to see if it would stick.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Threw a stick at a plate of spaghetti


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Would like a cuke spanking


----------



## exceptionalfool (Nov 30, 2018)

Is actually a sentient cucumber irl.


----------



## Rickets (May 5, 2014)

deetzy said:


> Likes cucumbers up the bum.


You haven't been watching Jason Genova by any chance have you?


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

deetzy said:


> I'll pass.


...out from pleasure.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

inventor of the coconut bikini and much less successful jalapeno speedo


----------



## Rickets (May 5, 2014)

deetzy said:


> No I don't know who that is.


Probably for the best.


----------



## Fever Dream (Aug 18, 2015)

Makes sculptures out of peanut butter in her spare time.


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Ties earthworms together in an attempt to make a super long mega worm.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Made a deal for a dill(pickle)


----------



## avoidobot3000 (Aug 22, 2010)

they eat chips with chopsticks because they don't like having greasy fingers.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Scored 100 on the XTC


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Stole my sunshine.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Broke grandma's spatula playing pine cone baseball


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

His tin roof rusted!


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

This person is absolutely bonkers, mate. Proper whacked.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Will roam if she wants to


Ninjah- Likes his pizza high in caffeine


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Made a pizza out of coffee cake.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Made a pizza cake with coffee frosting


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Laughs at their own shadow.

_ Sent from SPIRITO BAMBITO using Tapatalk_


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Ate a pickle that had been on the floor


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Rubs their feet on people to scratch an itch.

_ SPIRITO BAMBITO_


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Steals slippers from little old ladies.


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is a devious diva who does diabolical deeds


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Tried to make goatmeal cookies.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

she thinks nothing is finer than a big bowl of cuckoo puffs


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Made a necklace out of Lucky Charms cereal.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

listens to this while brushing her hair


----------



## Ghossts (Mar 6, 2014)

Secretly is a millionaire


----------



## Karsten (Apr 3, 2007)

Doesnt use utencils


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Doesn't have a uterus


----------



## 8888 (Oct 16, 2014)

Is never funny


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Is always runny


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Has a pet bunny named honey.


----------



## EBecca (Oct 15, 2016)

can feel the presence of bread from a far distance


----------



## funnynihilist (Jul 29, 2014)

Once disrespected the throne of King Crust


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

has a game of thrones tattoo but you have to go to a nude beach with him to see it in all its magnificence


----------



## Fun Spirit (Mar 5, 2014)

Filed a lawsuit against SAS.

_ SPIRITO BAMBITO_


----------



## Tomorrowisalongtime (Jan 15, 2019)

She is really on old woman in the body of a young girl (it's not even made up)


----------



## 3stacks (Sep 27, 2014)

Turns into a goat when there is a full moon


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

Peels off and eats only the bread crusts.


----------



## Valkatox (Oct 3, 2018)

Pretends to be a naked sumo wrestler when in the shower.


----------



## SamanthaStrange (Jan 13, 2015)

Showers with a pineapple.


----------



## Valkatox (Oct 3, 2018)

Showers in a pineapple


----------



## Excaliber (May 16, 2015)

Eats a raw onion for breakfast everyday.


----------



## WillYouStopDave (Jul 14, 2013)

Just let a chainsaw fart.


----------



## farfegnugen (Aug 16, 2010)

believes that a donut or two for breakfast will help him meet a nice dental hygienist one day


----------

