# Is Having Friends Important to You?



## LolaViola (Jun 23, 2013)

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## berryblue (Jul 14, 2013)

I agree with you. Friendships are a lot of work and often feel fake for me. I've tried connecting with people over the last few years but didn't get anything out of it, not like when you're a kid and the guy you met five minutes ago is now your BFF for life, you know?

I have old friends that I talk to online every day, and that's enough for me, sometimes it's too much. I like going out on my own and doing what I want. Relatives always bother me about it but who cares. I gave up faking friendships years ago because I ended up hurting people. Anyway don't know if that was any help to you, just another perspective on it, I guess.


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## millyxox (Dec 18, 2009)

Friendship is VERY important to me. Without friends...I feel incomplete. Although I have social anxiety, I need the company of other people. Ever since I was young, I was always surrounded by a small group of friends.


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## Neddy123 (Jan 2, 2013)

It's important to me to have someone to talk to if i need to.

And to have a few people to pursue my hobbies with.

But having loads of people isn't important to me. As others have said i would find it tiring more than anything. As others have said lots of friendships are totally fake and i don't have it in me to be that fake.


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## awkwardsilent (Jun 14, 2012)

I find it VERY important to me, my whole life feels out of whack when I am in conflict with those that i consider friends.


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## Leonodas (Mar 17, 2013)

That depends on how you define a friend.


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## Keeevin (Jul 16, 2013)

people are generally not to be trusted... watch the news, read the paper etc.

Friends are worse then enemies actually... u know you can't trust an enemy but when a friend stabs ya in the back u never see it coming.


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## Kaisser (Jun 15, 2013)

Number 1 in my list, despite not having a single one. But by friend for me it doesnt mean someone to hang up or do stuff, but someone you can trust completely. I wasnt able to make any of those, probably ill never get one of those but i neeed that itll be indispensable for my life, if i keep lacking that, i dont know how my life will turn out
And im putting friendship above relatives, people i have nothing in common with apart from the blood ofc.


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## Just Here (Jul 16, 2013)

Last year my best friend for over 30 years betray me. It has set me back and made me close my life from anyone else but family. My wife is my only friend and I thank myself every day for her. I have made the choice that I won't have any more close friends but I know this wrong. But for me to feel trust again it will be long road.


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## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

Neddy123 said:


> It's important to me to have someone to talk to if i need to.
> 
> And to have a few people to pursue my hobbies with.
> 
> But having loads of people isn't important to me. As others have said i would find it tiring more than anything. As others have said lots of friendships are totally fake and i don't have it in me to be that fake.


Same, except I act fake at work because I wanna be the perfect employee and get that raise and people gossip a lot there and it's sad but it's not just how hard you work, but how noticible you are that gets you ahead there.


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## Leonodas (Mar 17, 2013)

Malek said:


> Same, except I act fake at work because I wanna be the perfect employee and get that raise and people gossip a lot there and it's sad but it's not just how hard you work, but how noticible you are that gets you ahead there.


I notice that too.

It's all about "who" you know, oftentimes, rather than "what". Guess that's where we on this forum suffer.


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## JoeyG (Jul 17, 2013)

I feel incomplete without friends. Maybe that's why I feel pretty lonely right now. I still talk to people over my phone though, usually by texting them. I'm glad I have my best friend. I don't know what I'd do without him. I also do feel like I always have to go out of my way for friends but I think I sometimes distance myself too, purely by nature though, and I hope that's something I can work on also, now that I think of it.


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## Macker (Jul 18, 2013)

I can very much relate to what the OP is saying. I am a "loner" myself and for a very long time I was convinced that I did not need friends, that I could do stuff myself, that people aren't to be trusted, they are full of "problems" always complaining about something. Through some reflective insights into myself I realized that the reason I did not want/make any friends was because of a trust issue I had.
I made up excuses such as the ones above to justify how I thought about friendships and use them to keep myself "save from harm" even if that "harm" was there or not. 

I do love my own space, and to be on my own getting stuff done. I can be very social and all that, but I do find it taxing after awhile, a trait common of an introvert. 

But back back to the question, Yes, friends are important to me now because what happens when I'm an old man and I've spent a lifetime avoiding people based on irrational fears...If I got sick or needed help, who could I turn to if I had a problem I could not sort out myself...? Nobody and then I'd really be in trouble.


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## NoHeart (May 5, 2012)

I'm sure I could do without, but I guess I'd just rather not.


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## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

Sadly yes because I need someone outside of my own blood aka family who will accept me and love me and so far the people who are not even related to me haven't done that but I am 100% positively sure that I will have friends of my own one day. Good friends. Not fake back stabbing shallow retards. Still waiting for that moment to come. My sister and I used to hang out in the same group which actually really is a bad idea. If there is drama, there is no way you can escape it. They make it transfer from my sister to me. Effing stupid and ridiculous.


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## Richard Pawgins (Jul 11, 2013)

no


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## always starting over (Mar 15, 2013)

It used to be.


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## lucy33 (Jul 15, 2013)

I value friendship, but I don't have many friends I am hoping to get to know people and make some friends


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## green9206 (May 13, 2013)

Without friends life would feel very empty.Not having a lover is one big thing to miss out on but not having friends sucks even more.I have lost more friends than i can count over the years and it feels bad.Now i only have very few left and i dont want to lose them as well but social anxiety makes you lose everything eventually.


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## Glass Child (Feb 28, 2013)

Nope. I just need a few people for emotional support and a few people to help support to keep me occupied. 

I only have one true friend and I adore her, but we never seem to do much together..
1 true friend after I've made and have been hurt by so many, however, doesn't seem like an amazingly good deal.

I'll gladly talk to others though and be friendly about it. It isn't that I dislike people, it is just that I don't feel much..


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## Kalliber (Aug 18, 2012)

very much.. I get very sad lol when i loose a friend.. none now :/


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## OldPine (Jul 14, 2013)

Incredibly. I'd give my life for my best friends anytime.


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## T Studdly (Jul 20, 2013)

They use to be

My friends are just distanceing themselves from me everyday so I'm just starting to loose faith and say it's not worth it anymore.


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## ravagingthemassacred (Aug 2, 2011)

I agree with you, i find the idea of friendships exhausting and think I would need to form one with a person who needs their own space and distance and can understand my teetertottering from craving their company to needing solitude. I have no idea what a friendship with another female would look or feel like, can't imagine it.


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## Twelve Keyz (Aug 28, 2011)

yeah, but I've realized that having real friends is rare.


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## TryingMara (Mar 25, 2012)

Very important. I need to hear from them and enjoy seeing them. They're essential to my sanity.


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## Tomfoolery (Mar 31, 2012)

No. It used to be. Truth is, most people I know don't give a damn about me. I tried to be a decent person and it wasn't reciprocated in any way. So, I don't bother keeping contact anymore. I'm better off alone.


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## KYJE (Aug 11, 2012)

Chrissy Lato said:


> Personally, I find friendship rather exhausting. ...I don't think I have the energy required to balance a ton of friendships. ...I'm a loner by nature and I've grown to love my space. There are some days when I don't want to be bothered by anyone at all...


I'm the very same way. Have been so for as long as I can remember. But friends are important to me, oddly enough. It's just a matter of finding the right ones.


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