# Girls want status/money/power/fame



## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

This comes up on this site constantly, and it's easy to brush off because a lot of the guys posting it are just coming fresh off a rejection and are angry, but it's not just this site. This is everywhere, I run across this on nearly every forum I visit, it's on tv and movies and in music, people in real life say it/believe it, even several girls I've know have said this. This message is really ingrained in our society.

But I don't feel this way. It's really upsetting to constantly be told that this is what I want yet not even remotely feel that way. Is it me though? Am I just broken, and this is really what I should be interested in? Why is this such a persistent and popular idea?


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## euphoria04 (May 8, 2012)

Gwynevere said:


> This comes up on this site constantly, and it's easy to brush off because a lot of the guys posting it are just coming fresh off a rejection and are angry, but it's not just this site. This is everywhere, I run across this on nearly every forum I visit, it's on tv and movies and in music, people in real life say it/believe it, even several girls I've know have said this. This message is really ingrained in our society.
> 
> But I don't feel this way. It's really upsetting to constantly be told that this is what I want yet not even remotely feel that way. Is it me though? Am I just broken, and this is really what I should be interested in? Why is this such a persistent and popular idea?


What do you want?


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

euphoria04 said:


> What do you want?


There are a lot of things I want in a partner, I want respect, I want him to care about me, I don't want to be judged, there are so many, but I'm not thinking about his job, or his 'social status'.

Sincerity is a big one too.


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## Asdf*456 (Feb 1, 2014)

Well, I know I don't give two s**** about status, money, power or fame.
Especially fame. Fame is actually a turn off.
Status: I don't care what number you rank among your friends.
Money: If you can support yourself that is enough.
Power: This kind of makes me think of an overbearing authoritative figure and that's not attractive because frequently arrogance closely follows power. Actually, all of them.


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## euphoria04 (May 8, 2012)

Gwynevere said:


> There are a lot of things I want in a partner, I want respect, I want him to care about me, I don't want to be judged, there are so many, but I'm not thinking about his job, or his 'social status'.
> 
> Sincerity is a big one too.


Isn't that all that matters at the end of the day? What you want?


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## Mr Bacon (Mar 10, 2012)

euphoria04 said:


> Isn't that all that matters at the end of the day? What you want?


Pretty much, indeed.


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## Jesuszilla (May 26, 2013)

Well I think it's that way because since high school women have been throwing themselves at men with social status. Also celebrity men get p**** like it's nothing, men like Donald Trump who are far from attractive date super models. In short its hard not to think that way.

But OP you are far from broken if you don't feel that way. Just do you and go after men you want and screw what others think.


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

likeaspacemonkey said:


> They're not saying what you specifically want


Well they kinda are saying that, when they try to back it up with 'evolutionary psyche' and hormone differences. They are saying that this is what a normal, mentally healthy woman should want.


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## Crimson Lotus (Jul 26, 2013)

3.5 billion women of different ages, cultural values, ethnic backgrounds and each one with an individual identity don't have all the same desires and expectations of men.

In more breaking news, water is still wet.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Jesuszilla said:


> Well I think it's that way because since high school women have been throwing themselves at men with social status. Also celebrity men get p**** like it's nothing, men like Donald Trump who are far from attractive date super models. In short its hard not to think that way.
> 
> But OP you are far from broken if you don't feel that way. Just do you and go after men you want and screw what others think.


This is actually a good example of why some people think this. There may be a biological component to this, but idk. There likely is.

Thinking you have to be rich or famous or w/e to get a girlfriend is where the problem is.


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## ASB20 (Jun 5, 2013)

Quite frankly, I'd like status, money, power, and fame as well. Not for the attraction part, but because I want those things. I can't blame anyone else for wanting 'em either, and I really have no idea why people think that's so bad.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Money is nice. The rest I don't care about.


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

Yeah, it's a stupid stereotype/generalisation.


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## Amphoteric (Sep 11, 2011)

Some people don't want to build what they consider a successful life for themselves, so they leech off of one that someone else built.

Goes for both genders.


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## euphoria04 (May 8, 2012)

Amphoteric said:


> Some people don't want to build what they consider a successful life for themselves, so they leech off of one that someone else built.
> 
> Goes for both genders.


Word. Applies more to laziness as a character trait than any specific gender.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

I do want some of those things, that's why I'm working hard for them.


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## ASB20 (Jun 5, 2013)

diamondheart89 said:


> I do want some of those things, that's why I'm working hard for them.


A-men, props. I wish more people in general would just go after what they want (although I'm a bit hypocritical in this regard in terms of non-career stuff).

To be honest, it makes a woman more attractive when they're pursuing their dreams. Who wants to be with someone who's settling for average? ideally? No way. Doesn't that demean the relationship? I can't speak personally since I haven't been in one, but just sayin'...seems counterproductive. I'd think both partners would be at their best when both are working towards maximizing their goals, which produces synergy.

Plus, that motivates you to be better, as well. Everyone wins.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

What I think is quite a few women look at celeb's and aim to be like them.

It seems with a lot of women they have 1 changeable asset that can help them with this.... Beautifying themselves through makeup.

Here we have reality tv shows such as "The only way is essex" and "made in chelsea". The women on it are heavily caked in makeup, have spent £1000's on fashion, fake nails and even cosmetic surgery.

Now this is then reflected onto quite a few distinctively average (at best) women. They pile excess makeup on to look like women on these sorts of tv shows and gain the ego and belief that they deserve someone like the guys on them shows (muscular, overly confident, plenty of money etc).

The ego they gain boosts their standards way up high and many will think they deserve the best, and even think they have a chance at being some model.

Over the years I have never been with all sorts of women... Bigger, slimmer, pierced, tattoo'd, blondes, brunette's, even 1 or 2 with red and pink hair... But never 1 of the excessive makeup types.

Thats what P!sses me off about them... Not because I havent had a chance (I don't find them attractive) but because in general they look down on me, class me as nowhere near good enough and even find me repulsive. When in reality if the makeup was taken away, it would be the other way round.


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## Umpalumpa (Jan 26, 2014)

At the end of the day, we all want recognition,
Who are we to judge other people ways of achieving it? If a woman want to get a cosmetic surgery let it be...it will attract those who find it attractive, YOU have power over YOURSELF, you define what you get.
Some people may say you get what you define* but that's a completely different conversation.


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## kjwkjw (Dec 14, 2013)

well. then I have zero chance.


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## TheDarkGuardian (Jun 1, 2013)

Gwynevere said:


> This comes up on this site constantly, and it's easy to brush off because a lot of the guys posting it are just coming fresh off a rejection and are angry, but it's not just this site. This is everywhere, I run across this on nearly every forum I visit, it's on tv and movies and in music, people in real life say it/believe it, even several girls I've know have said this. This message is really ingrained in our society.
> 
> But I don't feel this way. It's really upsetting to constantly be told that this is what I want yet not even remotely feel that way. Is it me though? Am I just broken, and this is really what I should be interested in? Why is this such a persistent and popular idea?


A girl with that thinks like this I could fall in love with. You're not broken. Media and society keeps telling me I ain't worth anything unless I'm a heartless corporate shill that has to live amongst the 'alpha' lads with a brainless model on my arm.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

likeaspacemonkey said:


> I don't get why it pisses you off. If you're right and they're wrong they won't be able to get what they want through that method, so they're the ones losing. And if they're right and you're wrong they'll get what they want deservedly so. So why be pissed? Especially if you really don't find them attractive :stu


It reminds me of being back at primary school and having a kid come in with the latest games console none of the other kids can afford to try and be seen as the "cool" kid.

There's a load of people I respect and even have time for in life.... Such as someone who has worked their fingers to the bone climbing up the ranks of a company to the top, people who have had hard upbringings (maybe even had SA or depression) but have come out smiling in the end and people who have spent years bettering themselves/getting their figure to the way they want it.

However I just hate that type of woman who is average or below, then sees something like "the only way is essex", pays money for a few days in a beauty salon, teeth whitening, hair extensions, fake tan, buckets of makeup. No effort put in (only money).

Thats where the ego comes from. Because they simply didn't have to put in any effort. Whilst others who have genuinely spent years bettering themselves are more modest because they know how much time and effort they have put in to get where they are now, and they deserve it.


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

Pete, I don't really think we're talking about the same things.

I made this thread about the general societal perception that women are attracted to guys who are 'high social status' or rich/famous/powerful.

I don't really understand your plastic surgery/makeup hate, but you should probably make a new thread about it, I don't see how it fits here.


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## mdiada (Jun 18, 2012)

You aren't alone. None of that is a top priority for me when it comes to finding a guy. All I've ever wanted was a genuine, hard-working, responsible, kind, patient and even-tempered man. That is really it.


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

mdiada said:


> You aren't alone. None of that is a top priority for me when it comes to finding a guy.


Thanks. It was suggested to me that it could be trust issues on my part though, that I'm too untrusting/worried that I wouldn't trust a guy to support me, or not hurt me, and that's why I'm not looking for guys who are 'alpha' pack leader types.


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## gunner21 (Aug 4, 2012)

I think you could put some biological reason it. Women used to seek security, (which used to be having a man who could hunt and fight off animals back in caveman days). I guess financial security is paramount nowadays, but I'm not sure how much of it applies anymore, since there are as many women in the workforce. 

Personally, I think people (not just girls) care about the lack of money more than how much it is. It's no fun being broke.


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## TheDarkGuardian (Jun 1, 2013)

Gwynevere said:


> Thanks. It was suggested to me that it could be trust issues on my part though, that I'm too untrusting/worried that I wouldn't trust a guy to support me, or not hurt me, and that's why I'm not looking for guys who are 'alpha' pack leader types.


In a relationship it's inevitable for those involved to get hurt, whether intentional or not. It's when you both keep commit to overcome the hurt and work for the relationship that makes it last. I was the opposite, too trusting and fell in love with girls too easy but when those girls that I fell for didn't feel the same way, I decided to become emotionally detached. I can't open up to a girl now unless I know for certain that she cares for me as much as I do her.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Who's to say that they don't want those things for themselves, not just to date into them?


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## Umpalumpa (Jan 26, 2014)

Gwynevere said:


> Thanks. It was suggested to me that it could be trust issues on my part though, that I'm too untrusting/worried that I wouldn't trust a guy to support me, or not hurt me, and that's why I'm not looking for guys who are 'alpha' pack leader types.


Why wouldn't you want an 'alpha' pack leader type? Douchbags are NOT 'alpha', (ugh, I hate this word) exactly the opposite they behave like that because of their weaknesses.


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## Minkiro (Nov 22, 2012)

I'm put off by people (men if you like) who care about money, power, status and fame anyway. I think they need to sort out their priorities.


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## monotonous (Feb 1, 2013)

i find it funny guys without looks or money and over age 25 actually think they can get a gf


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

Umpalumpa said:


> Why wouldn't you want an 'alpha' pack leader type? Douchbags are NOT 'alpha', (ugh, I hate this word) exactly the opposite they behave like that because of their weaknesses.


:yes I agree, an alpha male doesnt need to or to bully others/dominate women to make himself look tough. I also hate that jargon used to describe male behavior on what is sexy or not. Not everyone can be sexy. Survival of the sexiest can also be survival of the stupidest imo


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

Umpalumpa said:


> Why wouldn't you want an 'alpha' pack leader type? Douchbags are NOT 'alpha', (ugh, I hate this word) exactly the opposite they behave like that because of their weaknesses.





CopadoMexicano said:


> :yes I agree, an alpha male doesnt need to or to bully others/dominate women to make himself look tough. I also hate that jargon used to describe male behavior on what is sexy or not. Not everyone can be sexy. Survival of the sexiest can also be survival of the stupidest imo


I didn't use alpha in that post to mean douchebag, I meant as how most of the posters here use it - a leader, the strong/confident/dominant type.


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## JakeBoston1000 (Apr 8, 2008)

the one thing you're missing is that everyone on this site(including women) are the minority in this world. Most out of the 7 billion or so in the world don't have social anxiety or general anxiety or genetic depression etc. so what the women on this site think or feel is in the minority and same goes for the guys.(in general, of course there are lots of exceptions)

We don't think or feel like the majority of people in the world and that's why we're here in the first place.

IN GENERAL women are attracted to those things.(just speaking from what I've witnessed over my loooong life)


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## Umpalumpa (Jan 26, 2014)

Gwynevere said:


> I didn't use alpha in that post to mean douchebag, I meant as how most of the posters here use it - a leader, the strong/confident/dominant type.


No one can be strong all the time, or confident or dominant
Why don't you want a guy like this? Out of curiousity.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

JakeBoston1000 said:


> the one thing you're missing is that everyone on this site(including women) are the minority in this world. Most out of the 7 billion or so in the world don't have social anxiety or general anxiety or genetic depression etc. so what the women on this site think or feel is in the minority and same goes for the guys.(in general, of course there are lots of exceptions)
> 
> We don't think or feel like the majority of people in the world and that's why we're here in the first place.
> 
> IN GENERAL women are attracted to those things.(just speaking from what I've witnessed over my loooong life)


True. I think many people will globalize/generalize groups of people into all one category. The problem is some think including myself that you must have a magnificent personality or great looking physical features to be attractive.


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## kiirby (Oct 8, 2010)

It's a clumsy negotiation towards some kind of social theory rooted in bitterness built upon false science and thinly veiled misogyny to make romantically unattractive self entitled men feel better about themselves.

"Women don't find me attractive? _Well_, that's just because they're shallow and materialistic, nothing to do with my own shortcomings."


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

kiirby said:


> It's a clumsy negotiation towards some kind of social theory rooted in bitterness built upon false science and thinly veiled misogyny to make romantically unattractive self entitled men feel better about themselves.
> 
> "Women don't find me attractive? _Well_, that's just because they're shallow and materialistic, nothing to do with my own shortcomings."


 Yes. Well said.


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## G0ddess (Feb 9, 2014)

Girls, perhaps.. but not real women. Real women come in all ages, sizes, races, social status and creeds. But I can assure you; women who have an amount of maturity and depth to them DO NOT care how much money a man makes or if he has super-model looks. We want true love, connection, chemistry and magnetizing attraction together; the kind of attraction that has very little to do with looks or anything physical. It's a _*feeling*_.. and you know it when you find it. :kiss


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## TheDarkGuardian (Jun 1, 2013)

kiirby said:


> It's a clumsy negotiation towards some kind of social theory rooted in bitterness built upon false science and thinly veiled misogyny to make romantically unattractive self entitled men feel better about themselves.
> 
> "Women don't find me attractive? _Well_, that's just because they're shallow and materialistic, nothing to do with my own shortcomings."


Nicely said. ^What the dude said.


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## bobby. (Mar 29, 2011)

Not all women are attracted to social status, but there is undoubtedly a trend. I think the statement 'Women, generally, are attracted to a man's social status' is as equally true as the statement 'Men, generally, are attracted to a woman's looks'. Few dispute the latter, but it's controversial to generalise women, even when there are clear discernible patterns in their behaviour.

Most women aren't aware of that they're influenced by social status. For example, a woman might say she likes a man who is confident, has good fashion sense, a good sense of humour, and a fun personality. She has an image in her mind of a popular, high status man, and she is describing that image.

Men aren't consciously selecting women for their genetic fitness and fertility either, but by choosing women by their looks, that's exactly what they are doing. Beauty is determined by things such as facial symmetry, skin complexion, etc. and is the heuristic that the male brain uses to assess child bearing capacity and overall fitness.

Similarly, women aren't consciously choosing men for their social status. They'll say "I don't care about my boyfriend's social status", just as a man might say "I don't care about my girlfriend's genetics and fertility", yet much of what they are attracted to in men are expressions of social status.

For example, good fashion sense means 'high status attire'. That's what fashion is. Humans adorn their bodies with clothes and accessories that indicate group membership and rank.

A good sense of humour is attractive because humour is one of the ways men compete for social dominance.

'Confidence' is attractive because it basically shows social dominance. Men who are lacking in certain masculine traits are not permitted to act confident - other men will tear them down. Therefore, most men who are seen to act confident in a group have been tacitly granted permission by the other chimps.

The best way to understand what women are attracted to is to look at the extreme cases. If an alien species wanted to know what humans most value in their diets, they would look at cheese burgers, ice cream, and chocolate - not broccoli and sprouts. The men that are most desired by women have one thing in common: status. You can find men who lack all of the traits women explicitly profess and attraction to - confidence, humour, looks, etc. - but who are hugely desired by women because they have status, e.g. they're the bassist in a popular band, or something.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

monotonous said:


> i find it funny guys without looks or money and over age 25 actually think they can get a gf


Not all of us are bitter.


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## Bluestar29 (Oct 26, 2013)

G0ddess said:


> Girls, perhaps.. but not real women. Real women come in all ages, sizes, races, social status and creeds. But I can assure you; women who have an amount of maturity and depth to them DO NOT care how much money a man makes or if he has super-model looks. We want true love, connection, chemistry and magnetizing attraction together; the kind of attraction that has very little to do with looks or anything physical. It's a _*feeling*_.. and you know it when you find it. :kiss


 nice post


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Golddiggers can't have my milk and cookies!


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## Mochyn (Jan 6, 2014)

I'd like the power to make the world a better place, the rest doesn't interest me, in fact fame would terrify me, I don't understand why anyone would want to be known, to be open to so much scrutiny.


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## Minkiro (Nov 22, 2012)

CopadoMexicano said:


> dont care about looks? could be but Im thinking you better look like a model from men's health magazine. assuming the girl is aiming high/overly high. The prettier the girl is the more high maintenance.


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## Dissonance (Dec 27, 2011)

All this political correctness is so naive. He can't get laid? That must be it! Let's disprove generalizations with more generalizations! Genius! Maybe women deep down honestly care for other traits. But honestly who gives a ****?


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## Ntln (Apr 27, 2012)

Well, a lot of guys on this forum are obviously extremely shy and have what can be considered "low-social status". And yes, there is an undeniable link between shyness in guys and not being able to get a date. I'm a decent looking guy, I like to think I'm fairly intelligent, but I've never got a girlfriend and rarely get any attention from girls, because I'm a shy loser with few friends, most of whom don't really like me.

But what most guys don't realise is, shy guys don't get ignored because women want nothing less than a handsome, loud, rich playboy with dozens of close friends. Shy guys get ignored because we don't have much of a presence. An outgoing guy will meet a lot more girls than we do and be able to socialise with them more, so he will obviously have more chances. It's pure logic. If you go to maybe 3 social events a year, you'd have to be either very lucky or very charming to form any lasting relationships from them. If you go to a social event every weekend, you'll more people and meet the same people more than once, allowing you to build up relationships and get a girlfriend a lot easier. It has very little to do with what women want or don't want.


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## dal user (Dec 25, 2012)

Obviously if there is a guy whos super rich, why wouldn't a woman run off into the sun with him?

Money buys happiness and whoever says it doesn't is a fool. Money is everything.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Rich91 said:


> Obviously if there is a guy whos super rich, why wouldn't a woman run off into the sun with him?
> 
> Money buys happiness and whoever says it doesn't is a fool. Money is everything.


You don't run off into the sun unless you want to get burned.

And money buys material things. Not love. Try again.


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## TheDarkGuardian (Jun 1, 2013)

Ntln said:


> Well, a lot of guys on this forum are obviously extremely shy and have what can be considered "low-social status". And yes, there is an undeniable link between shyness in guys and not being able to get a date. I'm a decent looking guy, I like to think I'm fairly intelligent, but I've never got a girlfriend and rarely get any attention from girls, because I'm a shy loser with few friends, most of whom don't really like me.
> 
> But what most guys don't realise is, shy guys don't get ignored because women want nothing less than a handsome, loud, rich playboy with dozens of close friends. Shy guys get ignored because we don't have much of a presence. An outgoing guy will meet a lot more girls than we do and be able to socialise with them more, so he will obviously have more chances. It's pure logic. If you go to maybe 3 social events a year, you'd have to be either very lucky or very charming to form any lasting relationships from them. If you go to a social event every weekend, you'll more people and meet the same people more than once, allowing you to build up relationships and get a girlfriend a lot easier. It has very little to do with what women want or don't want.


Yeah it's more about exposure. I mainly spend my time at work working, at home working or at the gym, working out. Whenever I go out it's usually with the same friends or by myself. I'd have more chance of meeting a girl by actually meeting them at house parties or meetups.


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## CopadoMexicano (Aug 21, 2004)

Rich91 said:


> Obviously if there is a guy whos super rich, why wouldn't a woman run off into the sun with him?
> 
> Money buys happiness and whoever says it doesn't is a fool. Money is everything.


money is material wealth. high self esteem/healthy self esteem is correlated with personal happiness. money, jewlery. materialistic things are temporary fixes just like getting married. Low self esteem is correlated with reality disorientation, fear, and other crap. Shallowness looks good on the outside.


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## Glass Child (Feb 28, 2013)

I want a puppy.

In all seriousness, any healthy male wouldn't generalize a woman like this. Females are all over the place in personality, just like males. Coincidence? 

1: To this day I have no idea what status is.
2: I'd despise having to leech off of anyone's money and be unproductive. 
3: Fame also means unneeded attention, which I equally hate.


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## dal user (Dec 25, 2012)

DeeperUnderstanding said:


> You don't run off into the sun unless you want to get burned.
> 
> And money buys material things. Not love. Try again.


Money is everything. It certainly makes me happy when I have some.

So what if money buys material things and im not arsed about love, if I was rich I'd get all the fine ladies I want.


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## dal user (Dec 25, 2012)

CopadoMexicano said:


> money is material wealth. high self esteem/healthy self esteem is correlated with personal happiness. money, jewlery. materialistic things are temporary fixes just like getting married. Low self esteem is correlated with reality disorientation, fear, and other crap. Shallowness looks good on the outside.


I dont care if it is material wealth

If I had millions of pounds my self esteem and confidence would be high and it would get me everything I want like big houses, women and other things.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Rich91 said:


> Money is everything. It certainly makes me happy when I have some.
> 
> So what if money buys material things and im not arsed about love, if I was rich I'd get all the fine ladies I want.


Why not just reply to yourself? You already have all the answers.


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## Putin (May 21, 2013)

But women generally _are_ attracted to those things. How else did a guy like Gene Simmons manage to bed 4000+ women in his life?


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## Mr Bacon (Mar 10, 2012)

Oob said:


> Not all women are attracted to social status, but there is undoubtedly a trend. I think the statement 'Women, generally, are attracted to a man's social status' is as equally true as the statement 'Men, generally, are attracted to a woman's looks'. Few dispute the latter, but it's controversial to generalise women, even when there are clear discernible patterns in their behaviour.
> 
> Most women aren't aware of that they're influenced by social status. For example, a woman might say she likes a man who is confident, has good fashion sense, a good sense of humour, and a fun personality. She has an image in her mind of a popular, high status man, and she is describing that image.
> 
> ...


Very well put. I agree.


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## Sacrieur (Jan 14, 2013)

I want those things.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

DeeperUnderstanding said:


> Why not just reply to yourself? You already have all the answers.


My response came out harsh. I'm sorry about that.

But, seriously dude, I'm older than you and I've screwed up a lot, and I'm not as bitter as you. Sometimes you need to question whether or not the bitterness is what leads you to having issues, or if the issues is what makes you bitter?


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

"Money is everything. It certainly makes me happy when I have some.

So what if money buys material things and im not arsed about love, if I was rich I'd get all the fine ladies I want."

Money is sadly a way of life but are things that much better with money?? I think not.

Theres been times when I have had plenty of money, it made no difference in my life at all. If anything it bought more worries. What will I buy with it? How will I make it last? It almost becomes like an obsession, counting it up, budgeting every penny and I become much tighter.

Other times though with no money have been better. In fact I am even way more generous when I barely have a penny at all.

People who haven't got money seem to think having loads of money will make their life so much better and complete. Then when they get loads of money they are disappointed that it didnt give the big impact they expected.

Just look at how many people have won the lottery and admitted their lives have been so much worse after winning the money.

Maybe if you were rich you would get women, however the 1's that come out of the woodwork as soon as you become rich are women that couldnt give a stuff about you, they probably wont even like you. All they see if the money you have and they want a piece of it.... As soon as the cash is gone, so are they


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## Lazarusx (Apr 14, 2013)

Gwynevere said:


> Why is this such a persistent and popular idea?


It has origins within our biology and history, there's a reason this is 'ingrained'.

The man with the greatest wealth, status and position of power would be considered the most ideal mate for women as provider and protector.


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## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)

because it used to be the man's role in a relationship to provide...and women would seek that in a mate.


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## cybernaut (Jul 30, 2010)

No,No,No, and No.


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## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

I think everyone finds those things appealing.

It may not be the main thing women look for in a potential partner, but it's certainly attractive.

If you've managed to obtain those things chances are you likely have useful character traits such as ambition and confidence. Not to mention you're more than likely an intelligent person.

That being said there will always be people who view relationships as no more than a business arrangement in which both parties exchange goods and services.


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## Royals (Jul 20, 2012)

What women or men look for/want is different in every culture,area, city or country. When someone has a generalization or opinion you don't have to take it personal. Just be happy you are not the negative person wich they paint. And like you do, try to polish the negative stereotype by empowering women to think different about themselves. Because when someone is deceived or believes in an false image both sexes have to change to really create effect. Man's and woman's perceptions and views of each other have to change. We are all individuals with the power to do that. 

Ever since Egyptian times women have been queens and powerfull rulers. Who says women can't empower themselves? This old role of men doing and being certain things and women not has to change. We both can be who we want/wish to be. So it's up to you


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## nothing else (Oct 27, 2013)

It's a generalization, however there are elements of truth to it. Not sure about the exact saying, but it goes something along the lines of a million people can't be wrong. And when you think about it, it's really not that offensive. Money is good. It buys pretty things like diamonds. Who doesn't like money anyway.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

It's common for people to use relationships as a way of boosting their ego. For men, having a gorgeous woman is a sign of high social status. For women, having a successful man is a sign of high social status.

Most of what we think of as sexual attraction is really the ego trying to elevate itself.


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## changeme77 (Feb 22, 2013)

Just ignore the bitter trolls that say this the reality is they have very little life experience and don't really know what girls want.


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## DubnRun (Oct 29, 2011)

materialistic. however life is boring as **** without material things unless you can ascend into another dimension


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## changeme77 (Feb 22, 2013)

DubnRun said:


> materialistic. however life is boring as **** without material things unless you can ascend into another dimension


I knew you'd be back lol.


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

I wouldn't mind some money....in case anybody's offering? :um


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

a lot of ****s want to always be the center of attention so they ask guys how they look that day, and the horny *******s will give them comments like " pretty, sexy " etc...

Look at these 2 videos how they change their minds when they find out the guy is rich


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

I don't give two s*** about status/power/fame...some money would be nice, but the other stuff, who caresssssssss

It's also annoying this topic is always brought up.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

Mobius, you've never had a girlfriend and seem to be very asocial. You do not have enough experience to make generalizations about women.

That sentence can be applied to most people on here.


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

Barette said:


> Mobius, you've never had a girlfriend and seem to be very asocial. You do not have enough experience to make generalizations about women.
> 
> That sentence can be applied to most people on here.


I thought somebody might say that. That's why I posted the videos.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

Oh yes the Youtube videos on picking up chicks changes everything. Once I saw on Youtube that George W. Bush is a lizard from outer space and it showed how his eyes changes. Thank god it taught me that because before then I never knew George Bush was an alien lizard.


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

Barette said:


> Oh yes the Youtube videos on picking up chicks changes everything. Once I saw on Youtube that George W. Bush is a lizard from outer space and it showed how his eyes changes. Thank god it taught me that because before then I never knew George Bush was an alien lizard.


its a video that exposes gold diggers, you're comparing fantasy to real life


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## Evo1114 (Dec 9, 2012)

I should make a YouTube video about girls wanting ME. I would have women throwing themselves at me since YouTube can make the untrue become true.


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

MobiusX said:


> its a video that exposes gold diggers, you're comparing fantasy to real life


I mean, not to start a fight, but there's a lot of other explanations(even ignoring that it's probably all fake). I'd say the most likely reason for both of those is that it just seemed safer. The guy in the cheap car was acting really creepy, i think if he was the driver of the expensive one she would have turned him down as well. There's also the idea that someone in such an expensive car probably has a high profile position and is less likely to risk it by harming you(while that's probably not a smart assumption, it's reasonable that someone might think that).


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## Mochyn (Jan 6, 2014)

Evo1114 said:


> I should make a YouTube video about girls wanting ME. I would have women throwing themselves at me since YouTube can make the untrue become true.


huh, confused. wait. read it again. nope. still confused. hmm that's a thinker :teeth

But would you want a woman that threw herself at you? can you catch? or would you take a swift side step and look the other way, pretend that she wasn't aiming for you but the guy behind you :sus


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## Evo1114 (Dec 9, 2012)

Mochyn said:


> huh, confused. wait. read it again. nope. still confused. hmm that's a thinker :teeth
> 
> But would you want a woman that threw herself at you? can you catch? or would you take a swift side step and look the other way, pretend that she wasn't aiming for you but the guy behind you :sus


Depends on how much money, power, and fame SHE had I guess. Either way I'd probably get knocked over and hit my head and live the rest of my life as a vegetable.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

what's wrong with being a gold digger?


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

komorikun said:


> what's wrong with being a gold digger?


Well it's kind of dangerous, your financial future being at the whim of some horny douche who doesn't really care about you.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

komorikun said:


> what's wrong with being a gold digger?


The term "gold digger" refers to a person who mainly wants to be with someone else for money. The gold digger does not really care for the person beyond their money.

You can want money and still care for someone, but you better make sure that money isn't your only motive to want to be with someone or else you risk loneliness, lack of respect for each other, lack of passion, etc. If you can find someone with lots of money and someone who you truly care about regardless of money, then I would imagine that to be healthy. Most people want an emotional connection and emotional support in relationships.

Similarly, being with someone based solely on how they looks is also relative to women who chase men solely for cash. Both these instances do not really care about the person and their emotions in a supportive way. It's shallow.


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## tbyrfan (Feb 24, 2011)

komorikun said:


> what's wrong with being a gold digger?


Because gold diggers use someone for their money. How do you think there's nothing wrong with that? :no


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Gwynevere said:


> Well it's kind of dangerous, your financial future being at the whim of some horny douche who doesn't really care about you.


They care about you but you don't care about them, no. Gold diggers aren't necessarily unemployed.


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## Putin (May 21, 2013)

komorikun said:


> what's wrong with being a gold digger?


Nothing, actually. The concept of marriage as a purely romantic connection is a recent one, and a luxury, when you consider that through most of history, a woman could not make a living on her own and her well being and that of her children was largely or entirely dependent on man she chose to pair up with, 'marrying for money' starts to look less cynical and more sensible.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Putin said:


> Nothing, actually. The concept of marriage as a purely romantic connection is a recent one, and a luxury, when you consider that through most of history, a woman could not make a living on her own and her well being and that of her children was largely or entirely dependent on man she chose to pair up with, 'marrying for money' starts to look less cynical and more sensible.


Actually, it is a problem if one of the partners wants something deeper, like real connection and emotional support. You don't have a real connection and emotional support with your credit card, do you? If both people agree that they are going to keep it on a shallow basis then I'd imagine there wouldn't be a problem, but, once again, most people who aren't forced to be, are in _relationships _largely for emotional support. You don't _really_ love someone because they have money; you love someone for emotional reasons based on respect, support, caring, etc.


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## Gizamalukeix (Sep 16, 2012)

MobiusX said:


> a lot of ****s want to always be the center of attention so they ask guys how they look that day, and the horny *******s will give them comments like " pretty, sexy " etc...
> 
> Look at these 2 videos how they change their minds when they find out the guy is rich


"Too bad. I don't like gold diggers." LOL! That's what they get.


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## Johana (Feb 3, 2014)

I'm not attracted to someone based on their social status or how much money they have, but rather on how they treat me.

To me a rich partner might even be a turn off. Sometimes a rich man will ask his wife to stop working, and I don't want that! I value self realization. 

Of course, I want money, since it can be traded for food and other stuff I need for my daily survival  So earning money is a priority, that's why I have a job! But I don't dream of getting super rich and it's not one of my life goals


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## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)




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## Rixy (Oct 4, 2009)

probably offline said:


>


I'll top that


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## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

komorikun said:


> what's wrong with being a gold digger?


It's essentially prostitution.

If you're okay with being a gold-digger, you may as well just be a prostitute.

Either way, you're sleeping with someone for money.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Rainbat said:


> It's essentially prostitution.
> 
> If you're okay with being a gold-digger, you may as well just be a prostitute.
> 
> Either way, you're sleeping with someone for money.


Well, yeah but there's a big difference between sleeping with 1 or 2 guys for money and sleeping with hundreds. I don't think there's anything wrong with prostitution either.


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## LoungeFly (Jun 25, 2011)

Gwynevere said:


> This comes up on this site constantly, and it's easy to brush off because a lot of the guys posting it are just coming fresh off a rejection and are angry, but it's not just this site. This is everywhere, I run across this on nearly every forum I visit, it's on tv and movies and in music, people in real life say it/believe it, even several girls I've know have said this. This message is really ingrained in our society.
> 
> But I don't feel this way. It's really upsetting to constantly be told that this is what I want yet not even remotely feel that way. Is it me though? Am I just broken, and this is really what I should be interested in? Why is this such a persistent and popular idea?


I am not sure where this became such a popular idea, but no, it's not what girls want. At least not worthy ones. I mean my God. I weep for the future if we teach our women this.  Money does not buy happiness. I'd rather be broke with the man of my dreams than have all the money in the world with someone I don't connect with emotionally.


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

LoungeFly said:


> I am not sure where this became such a popular idea, but no, it's not what girls want.


Thanks


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## Dissonance (Dec 27, 2011)

Quite simply, actions speak louder then words.


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## Durzo (Jun 4, 2011)

In regards to the gold digging comment, this is why clever rich guys pretend they are broke/low wage and take the girls out for cheap dates at first and dont splash their cash around to impress. That way you found out if a girl is interested in you or your money. If I were rich I would do the same. Probably the first 2-4 dates I would pretend to have an average job and see how it goes. For example a footballer (on millions a year) recently took a girl to nandos for a first date and turned up in a tracksuit, she then went to the papers to sell the story and complained he was cheap once she realised who he was lol.

Although to be fair I dont really judge gold diggers or prostitutes in a negative light. I just wouldn't want to be dating one who cared more about my money than me.


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## blc1 (Jan 8, 2009)

A woman working outside the home is a fairly recent phenomenon and presently the poorest demographic is single women so it's a bit sanctimonious for people to judge women for taking into account a partner's earning power. A man with little education but adequate vocational training can still make more money than a woman with specialized degrees. In reference to physically demanding male dominated occupations, I know welders, linemen, and drilling machine operators who make around 40 an hour. The jobs many men do are considered more vital to the infrastructure of a city and they will always be paid more for this reason. The earning power between the sexes has never been and probably will never be balanced so people can hardly expect women to stop throwing themselves at wealthy men. I find the female interest in a man's money slightly less shallow than a man's constant pursuit of physical beauty and youth. Money is at least tied to meeting basic human needs whereas beauty is superfluous.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

blc1 said:


> The earning power between the sexes has never been and probably will never be balanced so people can hardly expect women to stop throwing themselves at wealthy men. I find the female interest in a man's money slightly less shallow than a man's constant pursuit of physical beauty and youth. Money is at least tied to meeting basic human needs whereas beauty is superfluous.


False.

Women ages 22 to 30 with no children and no spouse earned a 8% higher income than comparable men.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/...en_n_703503.html#s133830title=Atlanta_Georgia


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

arnie said:


> False.
> 
> Women ages 22 to 30 with no children and no spouse earned a 8% higher income than comparable men.
> http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/...en_n_703503.html#s133830title=Atlanta_Georgia


....in 39 cities.

Just trying to keep arnie honest.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

Gwynevere said:


> ....in 39 cities.
> 
> Just trying to keep arnie honest.


Lol, try again:



> Men out-earned women in only three of the largest cities, and earned 8 percent less on average in *the top 366 metropolitan areas.*


Just trying to keep Gwynevere honest.


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## londonguy202 (Jan 10, 2014)

Yep, they want me to have money and wealth. That's why I give up, that's it no more dating . If a women want me, hope she find me.


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## Gwynevere (Oct 6, 2013)

arnie said:


> Lol, try again:
> 
> Just trying to keep Gwynevere honest.


So you just ignore how those sentences changed words from 'median' to 'average'...

Median does NOT mean the same thing as average.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

Gwynevere said:


> So you just ignore how those sentences changed words from 'median' to 'average'...
> 
> Median does NOT mean the same thing as average.


Each sentence uses a different term: Median in the first one, Average in the second one. That doesn't make them contradictory.


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## jimity (Jan 12, 2011)

Funny. Most guys don't have status, money, power or fame like politicians, rock stars and celebs, yet they manage to fumble their way into a long term relationship.


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