# Do you feel guilty about being attracted to underaged girls?



## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

Today when I went out for lunch I saw some high school girls out there, probably looked around 15-ish. Damn, they were hot, and dressed hot, and I just stared. And then I felt guilty for thinking that, because if I said that anywhere except on here I'd probably be ostracized and maybe even beaten up. 

I'm not saying all 13-17 year old girls are hot, but some are. You can't deny that. That's not even pedophilia, that's just recognizing a hot body when you see one. How do you deal with your feelings when you realize your body is responding to seeing a minor? 

Oh, and, what would you say if someone caught you staring at a young girl?


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## Blakey (Jul 5, 2014)

Think but don't touch. But seriously man...


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## Blag (Dec 12, 2014)

If you're caught, just say that she had a very peculiar dress, and you're wondering where she got it from, or something similar. Or you could say she looked very familiar, and you bet that you know her from somewhere.
But you can't blame girls nowadays, 13 year old girls discussing about blowjobs and dressing like 18 year olds (I'm pretty sure i've seen examples of these over the internet). I'm pretty sure you aren't responding because they are "minor", its more because that they're hot, so you aren't guilty at all. But yeah, just don't make a mistake of misjudging their age and doing something you'll regret behind bars, contain that sex rage a bit.
I also sometimes look at minors and think that they're pretty hot, but i know my limits, and i also don't feel guilty at all.


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## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

Blag said:


> If you're caught, just say that she had a very peculiar dress, and you're wondering where she got it from, or something similar. Or you could say she looked very familiar, and you bet that you know her from somewhere.
> But you can't blame girls nowadays, 13 year old girls discussing about blowjobs and dressing like 18 year olds (I'm pretty sure i've seen examples of these over the internet). *I'm pretty sure you aren't responding because they are "minor", its more because that they're hot,* so you aren't guilty at all. But yeah, just don't make a mistake of misjudging their age and doing something you'll regret behind bars, contain that sex rage a bit.
> I also sometimes look at minors and think that they're pretty hot, but i know my limits, and i also don't feel guilty at all.


Yeah that's what I was trying to get across, they're not hot *because* they're a minor, they're just hot because they're damn hot and also happen to be a minor. But also young girls tend to still be thin, and still have good faces that don't need a ton of makeup, so it is a little bit that they're hot because they aren't old.


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## Blag (Dec 12, 2014)

Cenarius said:


> Yeah that's what I was trying to get across, they're not hot *because* they're a minor, they're just hot because they're damn hot and also happen to be a minor. But also young girls tend to still be thin, and still have good faces that don't need a ton of makeup, so it is a little bit that they're hot because they aren't old.


Not enough to be guilty, *slams hammer* innocent and natural!


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## mattmc (Jun 27, 2013)

Girls those ages can be quite pretty. Your average women would agree. Just be like most women and think of them as pretty without sexualizing them. If they're wearing something you consider revealing it could be because it's damn hot outside, they like the outfit, or they're wearing it for people their own age. So try not to stare because that could make them feel self-conscious and frankly creeped out. No offense but when you're older it'd more than likely come off that way. Just go about your day instead of fixating on them in an unhealthy manner.


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## Evo1114 (Dec 9, 2012)

I think in my early 20's I may have found some teenagers to be attractive, but now they just look way too young to think about them in 'that way'. I am really close with my niece who is a teenager so I'm sure that has a lot to do with it. Although to be honest, I think anybody my age who would be attracted to a teenager would probably be labeled a child predator to some degree.


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## Ignopius (Mar 19, 2013)

I don't really find women under 18 all that attractive. I find some cute but nothing more. Although I think its natural as they are going through puberty and becoming more womenly.

Women used to get wedded off after their first period to men 20+ years older than them.


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## acidicwithpanic (May 14, 2014)

I don't know, a lot of girls these days are going through puberty at younger ages and that could contribute to the older appearances. Unless you can handle jail then all you can do is look.


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## tea111red (Nov 8, 2005)

Ha, Jared Fogle is in trouble right now for saying something like this....



Cenarius said:


> How do you deal with your feelings when you realize your body is responding to seeing a minor?


You stop staring. You're aggravating the problem by doing so.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

Hmm..... you can be attracted to them all you want. But don't stare at them or try to flirt with them :no.


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## Kilgore Trout (Aug 10, 2014)

Yes. Sometimes i think my mind hasn't developed beyond teen age. I act like a teen and i find teenage girls more attractive than older girls. I can't describe it but i feel like i am a child and girls my age would not even think about being with me. I feel like it would be an insult to them if i flirted with them.


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## VIncymon (Apr 16, 2009)

Well, let's admit it. We've been hearing "girls mature faster than boys" all our life. That statement doesn't just refer to emotional maturity. Some girls develop their adult physique quite early in their teens. It cannot be helped, it's not their fault. These same girls will dress sexy trying to get guys attention.

What can we do ? nothing but make observations.

Don't let the social stereotype of men being peadophiles make you feel ashamed of your sexuality.
Women make comments about younger guys who they find hot all the time. Nobody calls them predators for it.


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## daniels2000 (Aug 24, 2014)

Where I live girls are legal from age 14 ᶘ ᵒᴥᵒᶅ


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

VIncymon said:


> Well, let's admit it. We've been hearing "girls mature faster than boys" all our life. That statement doesn't just refer to emotional maturity. Some girls develop their adult physique quite early in their teens. It cannot be helped, it's not their fault. These same girls will dress sexy trying to get guys attention.
> 
> What can we do ? nothing but make observations.
> 
> ...


Most women are attracted to guys in their late teens and up not 13 year old boys. I've never heard a woman casually comment on how sexually attractive a teenage boy was before, and when you hear about stories like female teachers having sex with teenage boys it's usually some kind of power thing for them as opposed to being especially physically attracted to the bodies of teenage boys like guys are with teenage girls. I'm sure there are women who are though, but they're a really small minority where as most guys seem to be attracted to teenagers.

Men find youthfulness more attractive than women do as a whole.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

Ha ha what a story Mark.


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## East (Jul 22, 2013)

****ing disgusting


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## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

mattmc said:


> Girls those ages can be quite pretty. Your average women would agree. Just be like most women and think of them as pretty without sexualizing them. If they're wearing something you consider revealing it could be because it's damn hot outside, they like the outfit, or they're wearing it for people their own age. So try not to stare because that could make them feel self-conscious and frankly creeped out. No offense but when you're older it'd more than likely come off that way. Just go about your day instead of fixating on them in an unhealthy manner.


I don't think I can just change my thoughts like that. I don't see them as just pretty girls, I think of them very sexually, as I do with any hot girl. And my body "reacts" to their appearance. I have no choice in it.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Lol you say you're not ostracised but to be honest, people either find your posts amusing because they think you're joking or dislike you because they think you're serious and your posts piss them off. 90% of your posts are also designed to get a reaction out of people.


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## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

Persephone The Dread said:


> Lol you say you're not ostracised but to be honest, people either find your posts amusing because they think you're joking or dislike you because they think you're serious and your posts piss them off. 90% of your posts are also designed to get a reaction out of people.


I like to think I mix honesty with lighthearted humor in a way that lets me talk about the ****ed up things in my head without getting hated. No one but East dislikes me, as far as I'm aware.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

I'm not attracted to underage girls in general. Some underage girls look older than their age, for example a lot of models start working at 14 or 15, they are attractive but once I learn their true age I am turned off. 

The question is do you find adult women attractive or do you prefer women who clearly appear like they are not quite yet adults? If the answer is the latter, then you should seek help about this disturbing fixation before it destroys your life.


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## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

AngelClare said:


> I'm not attracted to underage girls in general. Some underage girls look older than their age, for example a lot of models start working at 14 or 15, they are attractive but once I learn their true age I am turned off.
> 
> The question is do you find adult women attractive or do you prefer women who clearly appear like they are not quite yet adults? If the answer is the latter, then you should seek help about this disturbing fixation before it destroys your life.


I think most men prefer young looking women, that's why women's beauty products are what they are. So yes, I prefer younger looking women, but that's not really a problem, everyone does. I don't like the look of girls who don't look like they've gone through puberty yet. I like boobs. I'm a boob man. Some of these high school girls though, thin with boobs, and a cute face, and the ****tiest clothes you can imagine.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

Cenarius said:


> I think most men prefer young looking women, that's why women's beauty products are what they are.


The key word here is women not girls. Men prefer young women.

I am only doing you a favor by telling you that these views are extremely creepy and should be kept between you and your therapist.


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## Staticnz (Mar 25, 2013)

No because I am not attracted to underaged girls.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

Guys aren't blind, we can recognize when a 17 year old girl is attractive, but much like when you recognize a cousin is attractive, you immediately turn that switch off. Whenever a friend is dating a really hot girl, by default I know it's wrong and I then can't get myself to be attracted to them because I know it's my friend's girl. You can recognize beauty, but it won't do you any good to let yourself dwell on something you shouldn't be thinking about.


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## Staticnz (Mar 25, 2013)

^ precisely. It's called 'compartmentalization'. You can take things that you could do, like find underage girls sexually attractive, and legitimately put it in the 'I know that is wrong, and because I don't have any biological pull towards underaged girls, I will not be attracted to them'. 


But if you've got some weird biological thing going on, that's really bad. Like guys that can't help but be pedophiles. These people exist. Sometimes they need chemical castration.


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## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

crimeclub said:


> Guys aren't blind, we can recognize when a 17 year old girl is attractive, but much like when you recognize a cousin is attractive, you immediately turn that switch off. Whenever a friend is dating a really hot girl, by default I know it's wrong and I then can't get myself to be attracted to them because I know it's my friend's girl. You can recognize beauty, but it won't do you any good to let yourself dwell on something you shouldn't be thinking about.


I don't have any such switch. You mention a friend's girlfriend, lol, when I was 19 my friend had a girlfriend I thought was hot. She was so nice to me too. He got mad because I made so many jokes about how I want to **** her.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

Cenarius said:


> I don't have any such switch. You mention a friend's girlfriend, lol, when I was 19 my friend had a girlfriend I thought was hot. She was so nice to me too. He got mad because I made so many jokes about how I want to **** her.


I'm really just speaking for myself, everyone's different, but I apparently have that ability to recognize something that's off limits therefore I lose interest.


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## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

crimeclub said:


> I'm really just speaking for myself, everyone's different, but I apparently have that ability to recognize something that's off limits therefore I lose interest.


I can accept that it's off limits, and I wont and haven't acted on it, but that doesn't make me lose interest.


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## a degree of freedom (Sep 28, 2011)

It's useless to hate yourself for your thoughts or feelings. Just keep in mind that your mind is supreme. It's what you choose to do that always counts. I can even respond to guys the way you describe just occasionally. It's uncomfortable and I don't like it, so if I can, I leave or avoid somehow. If that was ever not an option, then I would just have to deal with it. If a teenager is cute, she is cute, but I can reflect on how she probably thinks like a teenager and has teenager thoughts and problems and that we're totally incompatible and it's never hard then to just put it aside and forget it. There's nothing perverted about finding someone who isn't available to you has features that fit into what you find attractive. Like other's have said, you can appreciate it or be happy for them, but otherwise be an adult and control yourself by not letting yourself humor it. You just choose what is your center of focus and keep the person as a person central. It's the self-respectful thing to do and natural, since everyone has a form of thinking consistent with their principles they wish to maintain.


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## Ignopius (Mar 19, 2013)

Cenarius said:


> I don't have any such switch. You mention a friend's girlfriend, lol, when I was 19 my friend had a girlfriend I thought was hot. She was so nice to me too. He got mad because I made so many jokes about how I want to **** her.


Not cool. Totally against guy code. :|:no


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## Ignopius (Mar 19, 2013)

Cenarius said:


> I can accept that it's off limits, and I wont and haven't acted on it, but that doesn't make me lose interest.


I think you should do what you feel is right. If an under aged girl likes you then go for it. I assume your after the sex though and not a relationship. Cause having a drawn out relationship with a 17 year old girl would be weird.


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## JDW (Aug 22, 2010)

No just don't think of them in that way, older women... Now that's something different I find so many 30-40 year olds really attractive


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## Euthymia (Jul 15, 2015)

Just remember the golden rule.


You may look, but you may not touch.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

Ignopius said:


> I think you should do what you feel is right. If an under aged girl likes you then go for it. I assume your after the sex though and not a relationship. Cause having a drawn out relationship with a 17 year old girl would be weird.


You don't frequent the 18+ section do you? :laugh:


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## Ignopius (Mar 19, 2013)

crimeclub said:


> You don't frequent the 18+ section do you? :laugh:


I do but not as much lately. lol


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## Staticnz (Mar 25, 2013)

Ignopius said:


> I think you should do what you feel is right. If an under aged girl likes you then go for it. I assume your after the sex though and not a relationship. Cause having a drawn out relationship with a 17 year old girl would be weird.


Umm? Go for it?

Noooo do not take this advice. Underage = illegal...


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## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

Staticnz said:


> Umm? Go for it?
> 
> Noooo do not take this advice. Underage = illegal...


I know, I said that in every post I made in this thread, I was never looking for anyone to justify ****ing kids.


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## Staticnz (Mar 25, 2013)

I didn't say you did. He was just saying if an underage girl likes you, you should go for it.


And I'm just pointing out that is not good advice. Not saying that's what you wanted to do, just how he framed his statement.


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## mattmc (Jun 27, 2013)

senkora said:


> If a teenager is cute, she is cute, but I can reflect on how she probably thinks like a teenager and has teenager thoughts and problems and that we're totally incompatible and it's never hard then to just put it aside and forget it. There's nothing perverted about finding someone who isn't available to you has features that fit into what you find attractive. Like other's have said, you can appreciate it or be happy for them, but otherwise be an adult and control yourself by not letting yourself humor it. You just choose what is your center of focus and keep the person as a person central. It's the self-respectful thing to do and natural, since everyone has a form of thinking consistent with their principles they wish to maintain.


This is a better way of saying what I was getting at. There are beautiful young girls. But they are young girls. Just realize that and see them for the young person they are, someone whose still barely experienced life and is naive in ways only time can change, instead of fixating on them as a sexual object. It may take time but you can change the way your brain operates.


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## Cenarius (Aug 2, 2014)

mattmc said:


> This is a better way of saying what I was getting at. There are beautiful young girls. But they are young girls. Just realize that and see them for the young person they are, someone whose still barely experienced life and is naive in ways only time can change, instead of fixating on them as a sexual object. It may take time but you can change the way your brain operates.


Most them are already having sex, probably with 2 or 3 guys.


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## dadadoom (Nov 14, 2013)

It doesn´t bother me. I realized long ago I am a creep, but since I am physically attractive it goes mostly unnoticed.

Some teens are hot but so are a lot of adults. A developed body is generally more arousing, unless you are mentally ill (pedophile). It just disgusts me that obsession the pr0n industry has with forcing adults to behave like teens and ****. Thats disgusting man, and so is their insistence with anal sex.

My ex-friend ****ed his girlfriend when she was 15 I think. They are still together and he is a "very sweet" guy, so as long as love is involved you can have sex with almost-adults (15 looks like the limit though!!).


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## dadadoom (Nov 14, 2013)

crimeclub said:


> Ha ha what a story Mark.


Nice internet culture reference, hats off sir hats off.


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## crimeclub (Nov 7, 2013)

dadadoom said:


> Nice internet culture reference, hats off sir hats off.


I appreciate that you get the reference, please put your hat back on, I'd like to take mine off to you.


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## clairedove (Jul 16, 2015)

Evo1114 said:


> I think in my early 20's I may have found some teenagers to be attractive, but now they just look way too young to think about them in 'that way'. I am really close with my niece who is a teenager so I'm sure that has a lot to do with it. Although to be honest, I think anybody my age who would be attracted to a teenager would probably be labeled a child predator to some degree.


You hit the nail on the damn head. :wink2:


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## IveGotToast (Jan 1, 2013)

There are a few every now and then, but for the most part no i don't find them attractive. I have the curse of liking women older than me. The last two girls i had crushes on were 5 and 7 years older than me. 

I think all teenage girls look the same. Perhaps because they all dress the same and have the same hairstyles.


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## Cashel (Oct 29, 2013)

Nope. Wait, how far below the age of consent? I feel like that matters. 6 is a lot different than 16.


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## aibohp24601 (Jul 19, 2015)

Funnily enough, I find girls that are older than me, even if it's just a year, really intimidating. I only ever go for girls younger than me (as long as they're legal, mind you) 
Something else that is rather interesting is how Americans that are 18 or whatever thinking that being attracted to a 16 year old is disgusting and creepy, whereas in the uk, it would be legal and not seen as disgusting.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## batman can (Apr 18, 2007)

16 is legal in Canada also. What I find weird is it is legal to have sex with a 16 y/o but you can't look at a nude picture of one. Odd.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## aibohp24601 (Jul 19, 2015)

batman can said:


> 16 is legal in Canada also. What I find weird is it is legal to have sex with a 16 y/o but you can't look at a nude picture of one. Odd.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


I suppose it's becasie they are still children, so it counts as child pornography
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## batman can (Apr 18, 2007)

That makes even less sense. If you consider the children then why is it legal to have sex with them?

I wouldn't consider someone who is 16 a "child" anyways.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## peacelizard (Apr 17, 2014)

15'll get you 20. Window shop, window shop, window shop


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## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

I couldn't decide if I wanted to respond to this thread or not. I think it's a little dangerous.

I think the problem is a combination of several things.

The laws are not made fairly. Somehow the law makers didn't think things all the way through. Or they don't care.

The way I see it, the law is hurting people, *even the Children in which it was put in place to protect. *Stuff needs to be balanced better. The reason I say that is the Law cracks down on Adults really hard, while allowing kids to do anything they want and get by with it. That's not good! Because when a kid gets by with doing wrong things too much they will continue to have that mindset into adulthood. There was a time in History when it was normal for teenagers to get married and start families. Now days we say they are not mentally mature enough. Perhaps that is true of most. But what happened to our society that caused this? The only thing I can think of is life has become too easy. Back in those days, life was harder, people didn't live as long, so they had to get on with it! Times changed but puberty didn't get the memo. What I'm saying is these girls look mature, there for it's natural to find maturity attractive.

Does the girl have boobs? Yes
Does she have hips? Yes
Does she curve like a woman? Yes
Is she old enough for you? Not according to the Law.

* I think it's crazy that under age can have sex with each other but not with someone beyond their age group. The same is true with adults. I think it should illegal for them to even have sex with each other. Hey! if they are not mature enough to handle the consequences, they shouldn't be allowed. Just saying that laws need to be fair and logical, so that everyone can abide by them.

* I don't think Clothing manufactures should be making sexy clothes for Girls that age. That's just asking for trouble! It all goes back too: If your mature enough to handle what you attract then your not mature enough to be wearing it.

* I think the same goes for social sites on the internet. If your not mature enough to not know who you are talking too, then your not mature enough to be on here talking...


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## Peighton (Jun 12, 2015)

LiveWaLearningDisability said:


> What I'm saying is these girls look mature, there for it's natural to find maturity attractive.


No one's stopping you from finding them attractive physically. It's not like you can tell they're age 100% of the time from just looking at them but looks don't equal maturity. The shape of their body doesn't tell you whether they're naive or not.



LiveWaLearningDisability said:


> I think it's crazy that under age can have sex with each other but not with someone beyond their age group. The same is true with adults. I think it should illegal for them to even have sex with each other. Hey! if they are not mature enough to handle the consequences, they shouldn't be allowed. Just saying that laws need to be fair and logical, so that everyone can abide by them.


It is illegal. If both are underage, they still can't legally consent.



LiveWaLearningDisability said:


> I don't think Clothing manufactures should be making sexy clothes for Girls that age. That's just asking for trouble! It all goes back too: If your mature enough to handle what you attract then your not mature enough to be wearing it.


I'd like to give the feminists the pleasure of answering this one for you.



LiveWaLearningDisability said:


> I think the same goes for social sites on the internet. If your not mature enough to not know who you are talking too, then your not mature enough to be on here talking...


How are they meant to know whether they're mature enough or not though? Some will think they're 'mature' when they're not so how do you propose they measure this? That's what the law's trying to do right now. I agree that it's not foolproof but if you can propose a more efficient method then please, do share. These laws need to accommodate a large number of people.


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## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

Peighton said:


> No one's stopping you from finding them attractive physically. It's not like you can tell they're age 100% of the time from just looking at them but looks don't equal maturity. The shape of their body doesn't tell you whether they're naive or not.
> 
> It is illegal. If both are underage, they still can't legally consent.
> 
> ...


I stand corrected if you can prove yourself right about the law. It appears me it is up to your individual state. Provided you live in the USA.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of_consent_in_North_America

I don't think feminists are right. I'm not going to get into that because we'll be at that debate all day. (Possibly all year) There is videos and all sorts of debates out there. But I studied them, and I know now where I stand.


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## DistraughtOwl (Mar 1, 2014)

It's in our human nature to be attracted to physically mature bodies. It's completely natural. But I agree with the look don't touch rule.


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## Ntln (Apr 27, 2012)

No, because I generally don't. I think the youngest I might conceivably acknowledge a girl as physically attractive is 16-17 maaybe 15 if she was exceptionally mature, but since in the past few years, a girl's character and personality have become so intertwined with what I find attractive, I wouldn't _feel_ attracted to them due to them being behind me in terms of life experience and maturity.

But, to be fair, it's not up to you what you find attractive. However don't act upon it. Don't even think of acting upon it. Just don't.



mattmc said:


> Girls those ages can be quite pretty. Your average women would agree. Just be like most women and think of them as pretty without sexualizing them. If they're wearing something you consider revealing it could be because it's damn hot outside, they like the outfit, or they're wearing it for people their own age. So try not to stare because that could make them feel self-conscious and frankly creeped out. No offense but when you're older it'd more than likely come off that way. Just go about your day instead of fixating on them in an unhealthy manner.





crimeclub said:


> Guys aren't blind, we can recognize when a 17 year old girl is attractive, but much like when you recognize a cousin is attractive, you immediately turn that switch off. Whenever a friend is dating a really hot girl, by default I know it's wrong and I then can't get myself to be attracted to them because I know it's my friend's girl. You can recognize beauty, but it won't do you any good to let yourself dwell on something you shouldn't be thinking about.


I also think these are the best answers. Acknowledge their attractiveness if you will, don't obsess over it. Seeing a good-looking girl, thinking "wow" and then realising she's probably less than 18- not your fault, not in your control. Coming home, thinking "Oh wow, she was sooo beautiful, I wish I could have her"- at this point, your fault, because you're intentionally replaying the scenario in your head and you should have control over your emotions by that point


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## JustThisGuy (Mar 24, 2012)

16 is legal in my state. :blank

Also, some teens look like women and men. Don't feel guilty if you _notice_ them. But do be an adult, you know?


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## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

why would I feel guilty abouot something I have no control over?


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## Staticnz (Mar 25, 2013)

crimeclub said:


> I appreciate that you get the reference, please put your hat back on, I'd like to take mine off to you.


It seems like you're the eexxpert crimeclub.


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## mellowyellow321 (Mar 18, 2014)

To the OP, so... wait you are 26ish gawking at 15-year-olds??? Well, you must realize that the person you are gawking at is someone's daughter. 

If you had a daughter in high school, would you want someone like yourself gawking at your daughter at 26-years-old no less?? Come on man...that is just creeper. Secondly, at your age you should be a little more discrete with the "staring." If you haven't learned to check out a girl yet, well, practice makes perfect for your situation -- although stick to girls that are legal.

Lastly, I hope you learn to control yourself with this fetish of yours. If you do act on your desires you will be facing criminal liability, labeled a sex offender, lose your job, and face civil liability from the victim's family.

Life == over;


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

Many adult men are like pigs. They have the typical male-autism-selfish mentality. That is, they look at a beautiful young girl and see only that beautiful young girl. They can't look into the young girl's mind and realize that she's naive. Therefore they obsess on her physical beauty and impose themselves in a situation that is inappropriate for themselves and the girl.

These sexual type thoughts should only be acted upon if one both people connect in a mutually understanding way. These young girls can't connect properly with a man much older than them. So any action the man would make with said girl would be empty, lustful, and ultimately harmful for the girl. Indeed, such men are bad people, not for their thoughts, but only for their actions. Because they see something that these young girls have, which does not rightly belong to them, but they take it anyway, because they are selfish *******s who don't actually care about said young girl, but only the pleasure that said young girl gives to them.

Men who repeatedly predate these young girls should rightly be prosecuted. What age constitutes predation? In my opinion, it's fine if the girl and the man both love each other and are also otherwise healthy people. If they love each other and are not healthy, and the girl is 18 and he's 35, then yeah, that's messed up. Beyond that there are laws which protect these girls, which is much better than no laws; or the laws of the selfish base men who take advantage of the naivite of young girls.

tldr; it's natural to notice, but the moment you act as an older dude on a 'young girl', you've done a wrong.


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

I thought it was interesting how Jerry Seinfeld dated a high school student when he was almost forty. That guy is a scum bag. But it was completely ignored because of his show.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

livetolovetolive said:


> Many adult men are like pigs. They have the typical male-autism-selfish mentality. That is, they look at a beautiful young girl and see only that beautiful young girl. They can't look into the young girl's mind and realize that she's naive. Therefore they obsess on her physical beauty and impose themselves in a situation that is inappropriate for themselves and the girl.
> 
> These sexual type thoughts should only be acted upon if one both people connect in a mutually understanding way. These young girls can't connect properly with a man much older than them. So any action the man would make with said girl would be empty, lustful, and ultimately harmful for the girl. Indeed, such men are bad people, not for their thoughts, but only for their actions. Because they see something that these young girls have, which does not rightly belong to them, but they take it anyway, because they are selfish *******s who don't actually care about said young girl, but only the pleasure that said young girl gives to them.
> 
> ...


 It's a two way street though surely? No one's sticking a gun to young women's heads and telling them that they have to date older men - they do so willingly. It's very hard logically speaking, to see a perfectly consenting relationship - and then say only one half is guilty of it taking place.

Women have autonomy, sometimes this means they choose the wrong person to be with - that's the price you pay for freedom of choice.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

livetolovetolive said:


> I thought it was interesting how Jerry Seinfeld dated a high school student when he was almost forty. That guy is a scum bag. But it was completely ignored because of his show.


She was 17, which was legal age and she turned 18 a couple of months after they started dating. They dated until she graduated college.

Why does that make him a "scum bag"?

Shoshanna Lonstein at 17 met a 39-year-old, extremely funny multi-millionaire. Why shouldn't she date him? She probably went to events and places few girls ever have an opportunity to experience. Have you ever considered that maybe she really liked or loved him?

But you know better, you know what's best for Shoshanna, you know would make her happy, you are the dating police. What would the world do without you?


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

AngelClare said:


> She was 17, which was legal age and she turned 18 a couple of months after they started dating. They dated until she graduated college.
> 
> Why does that make him a "scum bag"?
> 
> ...


 The lead actor from the movie Kick ***, was 19 when he started dating the director - a woman in her 40's (they have since married) I'll make the educated guess there's no 'problem' here though because the genders are reversed =S


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## TommyW (May 14, 2015)

Guys are creeps, women are adventurous.


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## RelinquishedHell (Apr 10, 2012)

It's normal to find girls who are sexually developed attractive. That is just the way we're wired from an evolutionary standpoint. I don't see anything wrong with thinking a 15-17 year old girl is attractive. It's just nature. What's not normal is finding prepubescent girls attractive.


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

AngelClare said:


> She was 17, which was legal age and she turned 18 a couple of months after they started dating. They dated until she graduated college.
> 
> Why does that make him a "scum bag"?
> 
> ...


Maybe.

I'm just one man with one opinion.

You're doing what they call a strawman. I didn't say any of what you're saying. You are saying that. The only thing that I stated was the first sentence of your post. The rest is your own imagining. I was not talking about the dude you are talking about either. I don't know him or his situation. I try not to make blanket statements, but try to respond and formulate an opinion for each specific situation. Sometimes, in the case of laws guiding an entire civilization, this just isn't possible.

I was talking about Jerry. I can see that Jerry is a superficial fool and that he was not dating that girl because it was love. He was just really stoked that he got to hook up with a beautiful young, forbidden flower. That's my opinion and I'm pretty sure it's correct. The guy is a selfish douchebag for doing it, too.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

Paper Samurai said:


> The lead actor from the movie Kick ***, was 19 when he started dating the director - a woman in her 40's (they have since married) I'll make the educated guess there's no 'problem' here though because the genders are reversed =S


Yep. The sexism is in treating the 19-year-old male like a man who can make his own choices and then treating a 19-year-old female as a naive child who can't choose for herself.


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

Paper Samurai said:


> It's a two way street though surely? No one's sticking a gun to young women's heads and telling them that they have to date older men - they do so willingly. It's very hard logically speaking, to see a perfectly consenting relationship - and then say only one half is guilty of it taking place.
> 
> Women have autonomy, sometimes this means they choose the wrong person to be with - that's the price you pay for freedom of choice.


You've missed the essence of my idea in all the details. If the girl and man are both 'healthy' that is, they are capable of actually loving each other, and they do, then fantastic. The problem is that young people rarely know what love is, but they think they do, and they often fall prey to older men who know all this and use it to their advantage to bang a young hot chick.

The girl is getting nothing but hollow fantasy manufactured by their naivite and and fostered by the man's lustful desires. The man gets to bang a young hot chick. Essentially, if you zoom out, he is taking something valuable that the young girl has while offering her nothing but lies. THAT and only THAT are the situations I'm referring to.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

livetolovetolive said:


> I was talking about Jerry. I can see that Jerry is a superficial fool and that he was not dating that girl because it was love. He was just really stoked that he got to hook up with a beautiful young, forbidden flower. That's my opinion and I'm pretty sure it's correct. The guy is a selfish douchebag for doing it, too.


I was talking about Jerry Seinfeld. The girl he dated was Shoshanna Lonstein. She was a few months from her high school graduation when they met. They dated while she was in college. They were together for four years.

I don't see why that makes him a "scum bag."

Is there another Jerry Seinfeld?


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

AngelClare said:


> Yep. The sexism is in treating the 19-year-old male like a man who can make his own choices and then treating a 19-year-old female as a naive child who can't choose for herself.


You two are obviously personally upset over what I've said and are consoling each other by quoting and validating each others' posts.

In no way am I referring to you two. I am referring to the men and situations I outlined above. You two are probably nice guys who feel guilty for looking at a young hot chick and I set off that guilt with my opinion. Hey, everyone looks at young hot chicks. They're things to be admired and it doesn't make you a bad person for looking or thinking.

Only when you make the leap to acting, and acting in the way I describe above, do you do something wrong, _in my opinion_

Look, but don't touch! They are to be admired, not taken advantage of.


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## The Linux Guy (Jul 11, 2013)

I feel the need to mention, I don't like underaged girls. Do I find some of them attractive yes! Whats wrong with admitting that? But here is the problem I have with them. They are immature, annoying, and many are not dependable. Throw in the Laws, and you want to run as far away from them as possible.


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

Paper Samurai said:


> The lead actor from the movie Kick ***, was 19 when he started dating the director - a woman in her 40's (they have since married) I'll make the educated guess there's no 'problem' here though because the genders are reversed =S


Honestly, that seems a little f'd up to me. But I don't know the situation. So don't get angry at me.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

I think it's generally a bad move to date a teenager when you're an adult. I've been a teenage girl too and I know how immature they are. This thread is about 13-17 year olds, and I'd think most rational adults would realise that they're generally not thinking like an adult or capable of having an adult relationship due to them not being an adult. Exceptions will apply but as a general rule, no.

The older you are, the more you'd think it'd be obvious that that is true too.

The younger they are the more inadvisable that is, and it's obviously illegal in most places below a certain age.

I think the reason people are more suspicious of men has a lot to do with what both sides find appealing generally. Men are almost always attracted to underage women for physical reasons, there's rarely any common ground there so it will be largely physical. Teenage girls are generally attracted to older men based on idealistic assumptions that don't match reality - they just don't know that yet.

Especially because younger women can get pregnant, and the general idea that women give something up when they have sex but boys gain something, there's a general feeling that girls lose more.

People generally assume women aren't as drawn to youth, and they're not wrong. It's probable that most of the minority of women who date younger are though. They tend to think that women are attracted for less sinister reasons.

Also some people find it sweet that a young guy would give an older woman a chance, given men's attraction for youth.

But it's just as inadvisable for an older woman to date a teenage boy.

That's why the bias exists though.

edit: I don't believe this bias will disappear because it's propped up too heavily culturally and possibly biologically, and people don't usually even think about how it's propped up. 

The general sense that a woman's virginity is worth more than a man's, and this is literally made true by men's preferences in women having less or ideally no previous sexual partners.

This results in women's, but particularly younger girls (they're not 'ruined' yet) sexuality being protected at all costs, but it's not seen as important to protect boys. In fact it's often considered impossible for boys/men to be raped by women because people believe that they have everything to gain and nothing to lose for being involved in a sexual relationship.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

livetolovetolive said:


> In no way am I referring to you two. I am referring to the men and situations I outlined above. You two are probably nice guys who feel guilty for looking at a young hot chick and I set off that guilt with my opinion.


I posted in this thread and I clearly said that people who are specifically attracted to underage girls have problems. Let me clearly state the obvious which is that an underage girl is one who clearly looks like she is not an adult.

If you're attracted to a teen because she looks like an adult then you're normal, you're attracted to adult women. But if you're attracted to a teen because she doesn't look old enough to be an adult, then that's problematic.

My issue with you was what you said about Jerry Seinfeld. I'm no fan of his but you called him a "scum bag" because he dated a girl who was a couple of months away from being 18.

It is a little personal because I've dated 18 or 19 year old girls. It annoyed the hell out of me when some stranger had an opinion about that. We were just two people having fun together. I just couldn't understand why some people couldn't mind their own business and were so sure they knew what was best for everyone.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

livetolovetolive said:


> You two are obviously personally upset over what I've said and are consoling each other by quoting and validating each others' posts.
> 
> In no way am I referring to you two. I am referring to the men and situations I outlined above. You two are probably nice guys who feel guilty for looking at a young hot chick and I set off that guilt with my opinion. Hey, everyone looks at young hot chicks. They're things to be admired and it doesn't make you a bad person for looking or thinking.
> 
> ...





livetolovetolive said:


> Honestly, that seems a little f'd up to me. But I don't know the situation. So don't get angry at me.


 I don't think anyone's upset or angry in this thread btw ;-p We're just discussing opinions aren't we? For the record I'm in my 20's, so I don't think I'm even affected by all this anyway.


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

AngelClare said:


> I posted in this thread and I clearly said that people who are specifically attracted to underage girls have problems. Let me clearly state the obvious which is that an underage girl is one who clearly looks like she is not an adult.
> 
> If you're attracted to a teen because she looks like an adult then you're normal, you're attracted to adult women. But if you're attracted to a teen because she doesn't look old enough to be an adult, then that's problematic.
> 
> ...


You see, you did take it personally. I was talking about Jerry Seinfeld, not you. If I'm generalizing, I'm talking about the 'general' type of guy I specifically define above. Is that guy you? Probably not.

I judged Jerry perhaps unfairly. I don't actually know him personally (duh). But I have been a huge fan of him for years. I've watched every episode of his show at least 5 times. I follow his internet series and as a member of the public I just know the dude as good as he can be known by a complete stranger.

With all that in consideration I made a judgement call (perhaps inaccurate, perhaps not) that he is a scum bag for his ultimate motivations in banging this particular 17 year old girl. I Believe that she was ultimately naive, and he was ultimately looking to bang a 17 year old. Take away all the others superficial stuff and that's what it was. It most certainly wasn't love because the relationship didn't endure. Indeed it ended once she hit her very early twenties. They both realized it was not love (he, probably realized it much, much earlier, if in the very beginning; this is why I consider him a scum bag) and ended it amicably for his powerful influence.

I apologize that my personal opinion of Jerry Seinfeld upsets you this much. Or rather, to reiterate, it would be more accurate to say, I am not talking about you, I'm talking about Seinfeld and "those dudes" in general.


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

Paper Samurai said:


> I don't think anyone's upset or angry in this thread btw ;-p We're just discussing opinions aren't we? For the record I'm in my 20's, so I don't think I'm even affected by all this anyway.


Good  It seemed like I was being tag-teamed though


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## truant (Jul 4, 2014)

Paper Samurai said:


> It's a two way street though surely? No one's sticking a gun to young women's heads and telling them that they have to date older men - they do so willingly. It's very hard logically speaking, to see a perfectly consenting relationship - and then say only one half is guilty of it taking place.
> 
> Women have autonomy, sometimes this means they choose the wrong person to be with - that's the price you pay for freedom of choice.


One of my best friends was dating one of her teachers in hs. She was 18, he was in his 50s. She initiated the relationship, and ended it when she was done with it. She had almost all of the power in that relationship, and was hands down the smartest, most mature, and least-delusional person I've ever met. She dated a 50 year old because she wanted someone who could keep up with her intellectually and maturity-wise. She never even looked at guys her own age because she had nothing in common with them, and she could have basically had her pick, since she was also exceptionally attractive. Girls don't get manipulated into these kinds of relationships; they get into them because they can.


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## livetolovetolive (Jun 11, 2015)

truant said:


> One of my best friends was dating one of her teachers in hs. She was 18, he was in his 50s. She initiated the relationship, and ended it when she was done with it. She had almost all of the power in that relationship, and was hands down the smartest, most mature, and least-delusional person I've ever met. She dated a 50 year old because she wanted someone who could keep up with her intellectually and maturity-wise. She never even looked at guys her own age because she had nothing in common with them, and she could have basically had her pick, since she was also exceptionally attractive. Girls don't get manipulated into these kinds of relationships; they get into them because they can.


Only occasionally is this the case. The girl you speak of sounds exceptional and therefore uncommon.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

livetolovetolive said:


> I apologize that my personal opinion of Jerry Seinfeld upsets you this much. Or rather, to reiterate, it would be more accurate to say, I am not talking about you, I'm talking about Seinfeld and "those dudes" in general.


Relax you didn't upset me. This is just a discussion forum.

I'm sorry if I sounded harsh.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

livetolovetolive said:


> Only occasionally is this the case. The girl you speak of sounds exceptional and therefore uncommon.


But the point is people are individuals. You can't generalize and assume that just because there is an age difference that one person is manipulating or using the other. And it's far from unusual that the younger person is the one with all the power or the one doing the manipulating.

Unless you know the people personally you can't tell. So, why not just let people be? Live and let live. Love and let love.

Edit: just to be clear, I'm not talking about underage girls here. I'm talking about two adults in a relationship.


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## SilkyJay (Jul 6, 2015)

I feel guilty when threads like pop up. Every situation is different, obviously and age is just a number for the most part, but you still have to respect the laws. I've been around some interesting relationships to say the least and there's nothing that really shocks me anymore. Especially pertaining to this topic. I don't find myself in this situation really ever, but when the age is below 18, it's tad surprising and depressing in many of ways because I wonder where the time went. As a younger looking 29 yr old I sometimes feel age shouldn't be made out to be such a big deal as it sometimes is, young or old, especially if there's some sort of genuine connection and nobody has ill intent. I don't know where I'm going with this, but yeah I feel guilty.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

Chris Hanson would love to have some of you guys in his former show.


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## TCNY (Dec 3, 2014)

the fact that theyre underage turns me off :/


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## Perspicacious (Jun 28, 2015)

Why would anyone feel guilty about something they have no control over? This is ridiculous.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

truant said:


> One of my best friends was dating one of her teachers in hs. She was 18, he was in his 50s. She initiated the relationship, and ended it when she was done with it. She had almost all of the power in that relationship, and was hands down the smartest, most mature, and least-delusional person I've ever met. She dated a 50 year old because she wanted someone who could keep up with her intellectually and maturity-wise. She never even looked at guys her own age because she had nothing in common with them, and she could have basically had her pick, since she was also exceptionally attractive. Girls don't get manipulated into these kinds of relationships; they get into them because they can.


 Ah yeah, you also get these kind of situations too. So, assuming the younger individual is always innocent and easily influenced is a bit silly.


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## Blawnka (Dec 12, 2011)

I couldn't agree more, I honestly find it damn near impossible to not stare at them, I feel very guilty for it even though I would never act on it. None of them look their ages what so ever. I feel like I only like the way the younger girls look because I didn't get enough attention from them when I was that age.

16- is kind of sick, though.


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## Staticnz (Mar 25, 2013)

nubly said:


> Chris Hanson would love to have some of you guys in his former show.


Take a seat buddy...take a seat...right over here.


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## Were (Oct 16, 2006)

Perspicacious said:


> Why would anyone feel guilty about something they have no control over? This is ridiculous.


What about pedophiles?


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## Perspicacious (Jun 28, 2015)

Were said:


> What about pedophiles?


They feel attracted to children against their will. They shouldn't feel guilty. They just need to control themselves.


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