# Does Social Anxiety Affect You as a Gamer?



## jblanch3 (Apr 16, 2014)

Reading this article (http://www.giantbomb.com/articles/the-growing-illusion-of-single-player/1100-5017/) made me ponder that, since the gaming landscape has changed so much. I'm seeing a real shift away from single-player gaming towards the multi-player realm. I know a lot of people that I work with are playing Destiny, which I believe can be played single-player, but it requires you to be online and you run across people playing their own campaigns.

I never had friends when I was a kid, at least friends who would come over to my house and play games, or who would want to invite me to their house so I can play on their systems. So I grew up playing video games usually by myself, which was fine since multi-player gaming was usually something that was just included as almost like an afterthought in games.

But now that multiplayer gaming has hit in a really big way, I don't know how to feel about it. I try to do it occasionally, but I can just never get into it the way I can a good single-player game. I don't know if it's the quality of the games, or if they just don't jibe with me as a gamer, or if it's to do with my social anxiety.

Does your SA extend to your gaming lifestyle, or is socializing with others from behind your computer screen or TV while playing a game come more easier to you?


----------



## Kiba (Apr 26, 2013)

Idk if it has anything to do with SA, but i definitely prefer a solo experience over the multiplayer, which is why i get so pissed off when AAA titles get a half assed single player campaign but like a plethora of multiplayer content....


----------



## BTAG (Jun 27, 2013)

It doesn't really affect me when I play multiplayer. I just mute everyone before the game starts, and I'm fine after that.


----------



## Adversid (Mar 21, 2013)

It definitely affects me when I'm playing with people I'm unfamiliar with. Luckily single-player gaming is still going strong with a plethora of awesome new titles each year. It's just that they are increasingly becoming less mainstream as multiplayer games dominate the market, as well as social circles. MOBAs in particular spread like the plague, and now that I think of it, social anxiety actually helps me as a gamer because I'm more independent about my game choices and I don't have to deal with people urging me to play MOBAs or multiplayer FPSs.


----------



## jblanch3 (Apr 16, 2014)

Adver,

I really hear you about the independence, in that sense, SA is kind of like a silver lining. Now and then, people from work will talk to me about the latest and hottest games (Destiny, the newest NBA 2K or Madden, Dark Souls, etc.), but I don't really feel compelled to play them too. I will eventually, but in my own time. I prefer single-player and indie games, and like you said, there are still plenty of those out there. I did buy Watch Dogs on the recommendation of a co-worker, and while it does still have a big online component, it also has a full single-player campaign.


----------



## Inscrutable Banana (Apr 1, 2008)

In the sense that I don't talk much while playing multiplayer games (either via text or voice) unless I'm in a group with people I already know. Also, me being a recluse with no local friends means I never get to hang out with some buddies and play games in the same room as them while goofing around and enjoying some drinks or whatever.


----------



## Raynic781 (Feb 8, 2013)

Yeah, which is why I don't really play multiplayer games.


----------



## To22 (Apr 6, 2012)

I don't know. I think I have a bundle of issues that encourage me to isolate myself online. I like playing and interacting online, I just like to keep my distance while doing so. I should probably open up.


----------



## gamingpup (Jul 10, 2013)

Well it does when I play WoW. I never raid due to the whole TS requirement.


----------



## hmnut (Aug 8, 2011)

Not really. I play video games to escape the issues of my life. I don't want play a game that require me to socialize.


----------



## tonyhd71 (Jul 27, 2014)

That is probably one of the reasons I don't play games like call of duty and battlefield. I prefer single player games like Zelda, assassins creed, batman arkham series, uncharted, tomb raider etc.

Although I do like playing Pokemon online, probably because no chatting is required lol.


----------



## animeflower6084 (Apr 8, 2014)

Nope it's not really easier for me it's just about the same lol for some reason but the weird thing on forums I can chat away. On game chats in mmos it feels like chatting in real life for some reason to me even though you'r typing and it bothers me. especially when some mmos and pc games allow mic chat. everyone playing then wants everyone playing with them to have a mic on. So when playing mmos and pc games I mostly go solo and remain silent same thing for console games silent and friends list empty.


----------



## Boomaloom (May 28, 2014)

Not sure of its connected, but I prefer SP player over MP everytime. It's not so much that playing with others, chatting on mic etc makes me awkward, well alittle maybe. But I tend to find the repetitive nature of most MP games boring. A guy I know who used to love games of all sorts and was someone I could chat to about new releases has now basically fallen down the MP rabbit hole. He plays one game exclusively. I don't really want to do that.


----------



## Satsugai (May 12, 2012)

Unfortunately, yes. I experience the same worries and anxieties in gaming and real-life situations. And the irony is that I actually like MMO and playing games with other people.


----------



## Salvador Dali (Oct 26, 2013)

I usually play single-player only games anyway, but when it comes to multiplayer, it doesn't usually bother me provided there is no voice chat. Especially if it's me that has to do the chatting, I'm fine with leaving other players unmuted, but I hate having to speak through a headset.


----------



## fungae69 (Oct 21, 2014)

Unfortunately, most of my favorite games require to play with other people to be fun (fps's, mmo's). To combat bad anxiety, I do my best to just stay in the background or avoid the unnecessarily social things like raids or instances in WoW, though I know that I'm missing out on a lot of fun because of it.


----------



## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

It does. There's many games i can't play because i can't party or use a mic.


----------



## Tomyx (Jun 27, 2013)

I go to the gaming club at my college where dozens of other people come and socialize in a gaming atmosphere. Practically all of them will claim to have some sort of mental disorder, yet have no friggn problem at all socializing with each other. And then there are the guys who bring their girlfriends, adding another bit of awkwardness to it, having them interact with everyone as friends knowing they'll never get any. Point being, if SA is such a widespread problem in gaming circles, then where is it? I know people tend to be paranoid and think they are the only ones with any kind of malady, but if someone has anxiety, yet can scream and socialize and have relationships with ease, what kind of sense does that make? Someone is lying.


----------



## Mysteriis (Apr 7, 2014)

yup it even affect me as a gamer especially games likes csgo,tf2 were you feel like every decision and step you take is watched and can't even use mic in almost any online games.


----------



## midnightson (Nov 6, 2013)

I enjoy multiplayer more than singleplayer. I used to get nervous simply playing with people online but after a while I got over it. 

The only thing I'm still scared to do is get on a mic, which is the main reason I quit playing Destiny recently because mics are required by most groups in the raid and nightfalls. I wish they would add a chatbox.


----------



## T Studdly (Jul 20, 2013)

Yeah. I avoid multiplayer like the plague. You just get judged by your skill and get kicked.

People take the game way to seriously. The hell hsppend to just having fun and being a good sport?

I hate people sometimes...


----------



## Joe (May 18, 2010)

I don't like voice comms, and the depression from SA makes everything significantly less enjoyable.


----------



## Elros (Nov 17, 2013)

I don't play multiplayer at all and never have really. I just can't do do it. 

I'm a complete noob at mmos etc and I hate the thought of having to do quests and missions etc with random parties. If I had people I knew to play it with it might be ok for me, but all the strangers there, it's just like in real life and anxiety kicks in.

I can't even use a telephone normally, voice chat would be impossible for me. The thought of them having it and me just typing is terrifying too. 

I added a couple people from here on steam to try to play multiplayer, but I just haven't been able too. I only managed to say hi to a couple of them and they all probably think I'm rude or don't want to or something now though. 

So even if I could bring myself to now I've already left it too late.

I also get intimidated by the amount of friends people have on things like that. Like if you have 50 already why would you want to game with me anyway.


----------



## Shameful (Sep 5, 2014)

I think SA made me a gamer, because it's a place that I can have friends and safely fulfill my need for human contact. 

But overtime, I feel like I've gotten worse, and I stopped playing multiplayer games that involved talking to others a lot, and then soon stopped playing multiplayer games at all, and now it's been months since I paid my xbl subscription and I have no reason to.


----------



## Zyriel (May 20, 2011)

Yes somewhat. I am used to a more "individual" focus of gameplay, yet combined efforts to overcome obstacles if that makes any sense. Where individual players, master their spec, then come together for things like raids, battlegrounds, arena (WoW or MMO terms). Which is the way it used to be, probably from the original focus of games like Team Deathmatch and FFA in FPS games.

I used to love the competition factor and players seeking to better themselves in duels or friendly competition on scoreboards, damage meters etc. but for the same overall goal. Then tweak their spec or gear to improve their performance, exchange ideas, test builds, etc. Friendships also developed out of mutual respect, and shared experiences, overcoming obstacles.

However, in the more modern MMO's I have played, the overall community itself has changed dramatically. People tend to talk a lot, not about the game, lore, or the objectives either, mostly their lives, work, relationships, school, etc. Everything I used to find peace for in games, by immersing myself in the game world itself is gone. Those things aren't too bad if you know the person on a more personal level if you play with them all the time, and know them well, watch each others back, share items, accomplishments, etc. Except this seems to be happening in short-term groups, with the mental focus on "easymode" everything, how to get things without effort, circle jerking, blaming others, and quitting. Most do nothing but talk about themselves in groups, instead of accomplishing the objectives or improving their skill.

I play games for mental stimulation, overcoming challenges and competition, not to hear about peoples lives, especially of people I don't know or care to. So it has affected me to the point of not wanting to play in groups of people I don't know since most don't seem to focus on the task at hand. Plus I really don't like being told what to do, there are a bunch of bossy people now, that don't really strategize nor have any measure of skill, yet like to think they're "leaders" for some reason.


----------



## 58318 (Jul 15, 2011)

No.


----------



## 1437 (Aug 11, 2012)

It does quite alot. I play dota and I can't play against other players unless I have a friend on my team. Ergo I just play against bots. :/


----------



## Fat Man (Nov 28, 2013)

Yes it does be it in person or online. Back when the college I was going to held gaming events, I'd always got really nervous and didn't talk much even when I was with friends. It'd always kill me inside, I wanted to talk about the games being played and overall start conversation with fellow gamers but I'd always feel like what I had to say wasn't interesting enough or I'd seem too awkward for people to handle.

Interacting with people online isn't any different, it's actually worse. I don't have a problem playing games with people online but when it comes time to mic chat or even text chat I freeze up and my mind gets cloudy, I try to avoid it at all cost. 

They're two games coming out really soon that utilize mic chat. I'm going to try and face my fear when they come out and finally get over this communication phobia.


----------



## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Yes. I was too afraid to try multiplayer games for a while. I'm also still afraid of using my mic during a game.


----------



## Norman Jayden (Nov 5, 2014)

*No*

I have more friends on steam than in real life, who I chat with every day. However yes SA effect me when talking on mic in MP games. I prefer text chat.


----------



## Wrathstorm (Jun 25, 2014)

I've never been very good with talking to people online. I tend to stay away from MMOs for this reason. 
The only one I really had any proper interaction in was Archeage and I quit that pretty quickly when the content got boring. 
I'm almost as bad online as I am in real life. Especially as forums always seemed a bit like shouting into a crowd to me. :/


----------



## nooneknowsmyname (Feb 4, 2013)

BTAG said:


> It doesn't really affect me when I play multiplayer. I just mute everyone before the game starts, and I'm fine after that.


In Valve games like CS and TF2 you can permanently mute mic players through a console command. I do this because most of the time someone is being racist, annoying, or annoying.


----------



## x Faceless x (Mar 13, 2011)

I play multiplayer, but I don't use a mic when I do. I just mute everyone and play the game. If it's text based communication though, I can handle that.


----------



## VictimEternal (Aug 10, 2014)

it does from time to time , but with advanced warfare you can mute everybody and disable text chat too , problem solved , works better than Nardil


----------



## ScorchedEarth (Jul 12, 2014)

I'm something of an old hand at online multiplayer, since the first Unreal Tournament. I'm actually quite different in online games, sometimes even the joker of the guild/clan/whatever. Other times, I just prefer to be the quietest person around. My SA prevents me from speaking on mic, and I'm also not keen on 1v1 matches, although there have been times where I was really into a competitive game and enjoyed showboating. I prefer large groups where I'm not likely to stand out. My friendships never last long though, exacerbated by my altoholism and the fact that I don't like to talk about my life or get too personal.


----------



## Tomyx (Jun 27, 2013)

I find other gamers who feign to have mental problems often have no trouble letting loose and socializing in a nerd-type environment, whereas I remain silent and alone. So as in all areas of life, it affects gaming. I don't really care for the most part, but if you can't meet people even in your own damn circle of people who like the same things you do, what is left for you in life? To get better "eventually"? That's way too late for my tastes.


----------



## Wirt (Jan 16, 2009)

Yea. I want to try assassins creed coop, but I don't want to talk to people

And I've never done a destiny raid because I don't want to talk to people. Not that I'm playing destiny anymore since it takes too much time and effort when you're level 27 to make it worth it and I have 3 other games to play


----------



## uziq (Apr 9, 2012)

No voice chat for me. I really like to play competitively in games but my SA hinders that big time because I'm too afraid to use voice chat. It's why I only play solo or with the few people I know irl in games like CoD / Dota / league etc.


----------



## 87wayz (Jul 5, 2012)

While I have been shy in online games, I feel I am more affected by my race.

I have a heavy, deep voice, I'm black and I grew up in Detroit. So when I played online using voice chat for a bit, I was met with flurries of racial pejoratives and derision.

One group kept calling me "P Diddy," or I got booted once with a message encouraging me to "go back to Africa," or something along those lines. (As if the latter remark even makes geographical sense when we're playing anonymously online. I don't think _Halo 3_ had an "Africa" stage per se.)

I've abated this issue by avoiding voice chat, although I don't really play those types of herp-derp shooters anymore.


----------



## uselessgoodfornothing (Sep 10, 2013)

Yes as always this soul sucking disease manages to ruin just about every aspect of my life. It'll never take porn though...never...


----------



## ANXPhoenix (Mar 17, 2013)

Elros said:


> I don't play multiplayer at all and never have really. I just can't do do it.
> 
> I'm a complete noob at mmos etc and I hate the thought of having to do quests and missions etc with random parties. If I had people I knew to play it with it might be ok for me, but all the strangers there, it's just like in real life and anxiety kicks in.
> 
> ...


I can definitely relate to this, I've added a bunch of people on here, but the second they ask where I found them from or even just say: " hi" I freeze up and ignore it. I do voice chat sometimes, but usually only after playing with someone for a while or talking on a forum first.

Anyone else have a kind of perfectionist issue when it comes to games? Like I'm a major hoarder that can never allow myself to lose, waste resources, or fail achievements.

Like for instance, I was replaying Deus Ex Human Revolution recently and I could spend like 2 hours just trying to take down like 4 guys without being spotted, and with doing double takedowns for both of them... Now obviously they're all looking at each other, and at different corners of the map, but I'm going to find some way to get them all together and taking them out for maximum experience gain... Even though I don't really need the experience, and I've probably already failed the achievement for not getting spotted.

I don't know, it just feels like an inadequacy thing, like: "I can't do anything right in real life, but I'm going to be perfect in this game god damn it!!!"


----------



## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

A little I guess, but mostly I just avoid playing with other people and don't play most multiplayer games.

Just like real life. I don't connect with humans.


----------



## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Yeah, I can't use a mic and it hinders me in multi games to the point where I've stopped playing a few. Text gaming I am fine with though and in-fact quite "vocal".


----------



## woafy (Jul 9, 2014)

I played for glory on super smash once. I was tearing the other player apart for like 30 seconds but right after I knocked them out I started shaking, my hands got stiff and they ruined me. Never played for glory again. So yeah my anxiety messes me up sometimes. Depends on the game...


----------



## avoidobot3000 (Aug 22, 2010)

i play cs:go competitive mode which is the worst game for social anxiety bc it requires lots of co-ordination & communication. however, it is almost like exposure & sometimes when i am very alone it is nice 2 hear young men insult each other's mothers - and feel connected to humanity again.


----------

