# i need a woman to hold me so badly.



## mysterioussoul (Jul 17, 2010)

i'm honestly really desperate. i need physical contact. i need a woman and i don't even want sex. i just want her to hold me and tell me everything will be alright.


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## MaxSchreck (Nov 1, 2010)

me 2


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## jamesd (Feb 17, 2011)

me 3


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## sas111 (Oct 20, 2010)

Me 4

What are you gonna do about it though, life goes on. I'd like more than just a cuddle buddy however. :teeth


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## talkswithkeyboard (Dec 28, 2010)

Me 5.

This is going to turn into a game of "how high can SAS users count".


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## Diacetylmorphine (Mar 9, 2011)

me 6. 


:|


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## Ape in space (May 31, 2010)

Me 7

I've developed an unhealthy attachment to a pillow that I've been squeezing every night for at least a month. I imagine it being a girl and going to sleep holding her. Except in these dreams, I'm the one telling her everything will be alright, and I feel better by extension. I look forward to bedtime so that I can see my pillow girl again. And I just realized how pathetic that is. :no


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## jamesd (Feb 17, 2011)

Ape in space said:


> Me 7
> 
> I've developed an unhealthy attachment to a pillow that I've been squeezing every night for at least a month. I imagine it being a girl and going to sleep holding her. Except in these dreams, I'm the one telling her everything will be alright, and I feel better by extension. I look forward to bedtime so that I can see my pillow girl again. And I just realized how pathetic that is. :no


This is literally the most depressing thing I have ever read and I've been on this forum for 8 months now. :|


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## InfiniteBlaze (Jan 27, 2011)

Do you guys not have mothers that you can hug?


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## GivenToFly (Oct 16, 2011)

Me 8

The only girl I ever had the guts to ask out said "i'll think about it." Then she told her friends and they all started laughing at me. She just started ignoring me the next day. It took me 4 months to get the courage to do it in the first place.


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## a degree of freedom (Sep 28, 2011)

Ape in space said:


> Me 7
> 
> I've developed an unhealthy attachment to a pillow that I've been squeezing every night for at least a month. I imagine it being a girl and going to sleep holding her. Except in these dreams, I'm the one telling her everything will be alright, and I feel better by extension. I look forward to bedtime so that I can see my pillow girl again. And I just realized how pathetic that is. :no


If it makes you feel better, sometimes I just stop coping well and have to stop, close my eyes, and imagine a lover-friend I can hold and kiss and who is special to me and who loves me back in the same way. I try to make it as real as I can to my imagination just how it feels, and how she feels, and how she responds. Sometimes I've buried my face in my pillow for the same reason.

You know, after a little while, you feel better. Lonely, but a little loved too, so not so bad.  Anyone will do the best they can with what they have. There's no shame in that.



GivenToFly said:


> Me 7
> 
> The only girl I ever had the guts to ask out said "i'll think about it." Then she told her friends and they all started laughing at me. She just started ignoring me the next day. It took me 4 months to get the courage to do it in the first place.


That is not ok!!


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## BobtheBest (Aug 27, 2011)

InfiniteBlaze said:


> Do you guys not have mothers that you can hug?


I do not. Mine's died on me. It feels terrible for me to be starved of female contact for so many years now.


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## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

me 11


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## cleanandsimple (Oct 18, 2011)

Go to a strip club. You get more than a hug, just hold on to your wallet.


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## cleanandsimple (Oct 18, 2011)

I was just kidding about that.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

I want someone to hold me so bad that it makes me cry..


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## i just want luv (Feb 13, 2011)

get it in little homie you got to break the container to fighj and win


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## TenYears (Jan 15, 2010)

Having someone there for you & then losing her is worse. I think it's better to not know what you've lost. It's worse.


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## mysterioussoul (Jul 17, 2010)

*


InfiniteBlaze said:



Do you guys not have mothers that you can hug?

Click to expand...

*i do and i'm fortunate to hug her whenever i want. i usually hug her when i feel down and i imagine hugging a girlfriend.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

:group

Free hugs for all!


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## jimity (Jan 12, 2011)

^ This reminds me of the episode of the simpsons where homer has vending machines stuck on his arms and is at a wedding and says something along the lines of free stuff for all.


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## Rixy (Oct 4, 2009)

Anyone else badly crave affection but too afraid to come off as needy? I'm not saying that wanting affection is a bad thing, but I'd rather be strong and independent at the end of the day.


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## nbar (Jun 11, 2010)

jimity said:


> ^ This reminds me of the episode of the simpsons where homer has vending machines stuck on his arms and is at a wedding and says something along the lines of free stuff for all.


Candy and soda for all


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## Lanter (Aug 3, 2011)

I'm not actually craving physical contact at all. I really want to say it though, so here goes;

Me 12

That was fun :clap


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## sweetD (Sep 6, 2011)

Rixy said:


> Anyone else badly crave affection but too afraid to come off as needy? I'm not saying that wanting affection is a bad thing, but I'd rather be strong and independent at the end of the day.


Always afraid of coming off as needy because it puts people off. Maybe I need to be with someone equally as needy as me.


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## hoddesdon (Jul 28, 2011)

Rixy said:


> Anyone else badly crave affection but too afraid to come off as needy? I'm not saying that wanting affection is a bad thing, but I'd rather be strong and independent at the end of the day.


Well, you still have time to crave affection in the morning.


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## LucMot (Oct 18, 2011)

Me 13

I should have bought a shirt I saw some months ago, it was written free hugs on it. I wonder if anyone would have hugged me kkk.


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## shana (Mar 9, 2009)

me 14, except I want a male. I usually hold a big pillow and pretend it's a boy. We should all get and give free hugs to everyone!


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## NoName99 (Jul 3, 2011)

me sqrt(225)

Saw a movie sunday night where one of the characters is exactly the prototype of the girl I'd fall completely and madly for... I've been banging my head against every wall non-stop since. Meh, I just can't watch any romantic movies anymore without going crazy.


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## BlazingLazer (Jul 16, 2011)

* wonders how many people realized the OP was female...


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## BlazingLazer (Jul 16, 2011)

Trochodendraceae said:


> BlazingLazer said:
> 
> 
> > * wonders how many people realized the OP was female...
> ...


Well, not too much honestly. Merely an observation that I thought most people didn't notice. Carry on.


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## wootmehver (Oct 18, 2007)

I have never been the huggy type at all--- don't even hug pillows. 

A hug will not fix my problems. It's not magic.

Not interested in getting any sort of "charity hug" from a female (or even a male) who is taking pity on me.


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## leave me alone (Apr 1, 2011)

Charity hug. lol


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

Me too.  I wish I could just get a hug from someone that's not related to me.


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## rgrwng (Aug 25, 2011)

i bought one of those anime pillows (dakimakura)earlier this year just so i have something of decent size to hug and sleep with.

my mother doesn't hug - she hates.


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## Socialanxiety11 (Oct 3, 2011)

:rain me too i wish i had someone to hold me.


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## jon 29 uk (Sep 14, 2011)

have an e-hug from me :b


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## sas111 (Oct 20, 2010)

Trochodendraceae said:


> I actually feel extremely uncomfortable hugging family members.. Can't stand touching them. Gives me the creeps...


I can't touch them either, I'd feel nauseaus. Too freaky.


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## jamesd (Feb 17, 2011)

Hugging your family member is nothing like hugging someone that you are sexually attracted to. At least I hope it isn't for you. That's pretty disturbing.


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## candiedsky (Aug 7, 2011)

Vanilllabb said:


> I can't touch them either, I'd feel nauseaus. Too freaky.


I second this. It makes me feel disgusted down to my core.


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## Kathykook (Aug 16, 2011)

You can always get a .....er....doll


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## Karuni (Jun 26, 2011)

I'm a person who needs hugs too. I only sometimes like hugging my mom when I really need it. The only other person I hugged on a daily basis was this one friend from high school who hugged everyone. She was kinda motherly toward everyone. Otherwise, I don't like touching people. 
Dogs are the complete opposite. I'd love to cuddle with and hold every dog I see. 
I wish so much that I could have a guy hug and hold me... -sigh-


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## kiwikiwi (Jul 27, 2009)

Hug ...my legs...hug...my arms...hug....my neck...hug my tongue....hug me whole......


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## Invisigirl (Oct 11, 2011)

Me 16!

I see that I'm not the only pillow-squeezer on this forum. My pillows go flat so quickly. :blush

Whenever a friend or family member hugs me, I don't want to let go because I'm so deprived of physical contact. But I have to let go, or I'll look like a creepasaurus rex.


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## Perkins (Dec 14, 2010)

Rixy said:


> Anyone else badly crave affection but too afraid to come off as needy? I'm not saying that wanting affection is a bad thing, but I'd rather be strong and independent at the end of the day.


I can relate. I'm always afraid to come off as clingy and needy when I do that.

As for family members, it's really not the same as being affectionate with someone you're romantically involved with. That and the fact that I really don't like being affectionate with my relatives.

It's sad how often I think about wanting to hold someone or vice versa.


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## Dub16 (Feb 28, 2010)

yer all bananas

I couldn't disagree more.

You shouldn't fall into the trap of substituting loneliness for the want of a relationship.

And you also need to remember that women do the same things that we do.

They fart and they do everything that we do.

I'm aware that its a bit ironical that I posted last night about people needing each other.

But you have to keep stuff in context.

Most women I've met have been no different from most men I've met.


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

Dub16 said:


> You shouldn't fall into the trap of substituting loneliness for the want of a relationship.


You have to be in a relationship to hug or hold someone?

Anyway, I certainly don't want a partner, but would still love a hug from someone unrelated to me. It's been over six years. :sigh


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## Dub16 (Feb 28, 2010)

phoelomek said:


> You have to be in a relationship to hug or hold someone?
> 
> Anyway, yes, I'd agree with that I think. I definitely don't want a partner, but would still love a hug from someone unrelated to me.


I see yer point. But how nice do you want the hug to be?

If you hug a person after knowing them for one week.

And then hug the same person after 7 years, its different

Its a different emotion.

That was all I was trying to say in my last post.


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## Paper Samurai (Oct 1, 2009)

rgrwng said:


> i bought one of those anime pillows (dakimakura)earlier this year just so i have something of decent size to hug and sleep with.
> 
> my mother doesn't hug - she hates.


I was wondering when someone was going to mention a dakimakura lol. What with all this pillow talk going on in here.


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## Invisigirl (Oct 11, 2011)

Dub16 said:


> And you also need to remember that women do the same things that we do.
> 
> They fart and they do everything that we do.
> 
> ...


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## Ih8Hondas (Aug 29, 2011)

Ape in space:1059369588 said:


> I've developed an unhealthy attachment to a pillow that I've been squeezing every night for at least a month. I imagine it being a girl and going to sleep holding her. Except in these dreams, I'm the one telling her everything will be alright, and I feel better by extension. I look forward to bedtime so that I can see my pillow girl again. And I just realized how pathetic that is. :no


I've been doing the same thing for a couple of years now. I haven't formed an emotional connection with the pillow though.


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## Weird Fishes (Feb 2, 2011)

Doesn't get much better than hugging/holding the person you have feelings for. I miss that.


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

I could do with a hug


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## moveon (Mar 28, 2009)

I hugged a girl....... in a lucid dream i had a couple of months ago. It was amazing


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## Ckg2011 (Aug 9, 2011)

GivenToFly said:


> Me 8
> 
> The only girl I ever had the guts to ask out said "i'll think about it." Then she told her friends and they all started laughing at me. She just started ignoring me the next day. It took me 4 months to get the courage to do it in the first place.


 I know exactly how that feels.


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## shyDancer (Nov 2, 2011)

I really want a hug too. 

why is it so hard to get one?


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## KILOBRAVO (Sep 17, 2011)

I remember once when I was in college ( aged about 22 I think), and one of my classmates I was sitting next to, lent into me as a kind of friendly hug type thing, (maybe she was tired or something), and I put my arm around her etc.

This was the only type of physical contact Ive EVER managed to have with a girl, and it felt amazing at the time, just to feel like what it must be like to hold someone in that way, feel their body heat on yours, put your arm around them , and you knew you were like, being accepted and they valued your contact, I did kinda slightly fancy her, which maybe made it feel a bit more for me than it really was.

Now when I think about how pathetic what Ive just typed is, it makes me feel a bit crap if thats all Ive got to base any feelings of what that type of intimacy must be like.


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## humourless (Sep 27, 2011)

Invisigirl said:


> Me 16!
> 
> I see that I'm not the only pillow-squeezer on this forum. My pillows go flat so quickly. :blush
> 
> Whenever a friend or family member hugs me, I don't want to let go because I'm so deprived of physical contact. But I have to let go, or I'll *look like a creepasaurus rex*.


creepasaurus rex!!


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## humourless (Sep 27, 2011)

I need a woman to hold me so well!


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## jamesd (Feb 17, 2011)

KILOBRAVO said:


> I remember once when I was in college ( aged about 22 I think), and one of my classmates I was sitting next to, lent into me as a kind of friendly hug type thing, (maybe she was tired or something), and I put my arm around her etc.
> 
> This was the only type of physical contact Ive EVER managed to have with a girl, and it felt amazing at the time, just to feel like what it must be like to hold someone in that way, feel their body heat on yours, put your arm around them , and you knew you were like, being accepted and they valued your contact, I did kinda slightly fancy her, which maybe made it feel a bit more for me than it really was.
> 
> Now when I think about how pathetic what Ive just typed is, it makes me feel a bit crap if thats all Ive got to base any feelings of what that type of intimacy must be like.


One time in college I was high as kite on some mushrooms and wandered around campus giving hugs to random people. I would say most people were pretty receptive but some guys got kind of angry and one girl sprinted away when I was approaching her with open arms. Rofl.


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## GPU (Nov 5, 2011)

you are a female though. i believe you meant to say a man.


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## magtoto (Nov 16, 2011)

you will find her you just have to look go on some dating websites


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## mysterioussoul (Jul 17, 2010)

GPU said:


> you are a female though. i believe you meant to say a man.


yes, but i'm a gay woman.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

sigh...


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## Dissonance (Dec 27, 2011)

I need a creepasaurus rex to hold me so badly.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

That's really the number one thing I want out a relationship. Someone to hold me.

It's too bad though. From what I've seen relationships are mostly based on talking, but that's what I can't do. I find it extremely hard to make any kind of smalltalk. I can talk about the abstract like science or politics. But I can't talk about myself and I can't do smalltalk. If you try to have a normal conversation with me it will just devolve into awkward silence after about a minute.

My fantasy is to find a girl that doesn't want to make smalltalk. A girl that just wants to cuddle and go do stuff together but doesn't need me to talk all the time. Eventually I'll have to give up on life and just buy one of those weird japanese pillows.


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

Awe, I like this thread xD. I want a female to cuddle tooo! ^^


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## MrSelfDestruct17 (Jan 27, 2012)

Looks like I'm not alone.

Well, I am, but.....

:cry


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## wootmehver (Oct 18, 2007)

Hugging doesn't interest me at all. 

Physical contact of all kinds turns me off.

I'd rather be deeply understood (spiritually hugged).


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## jg43i9jghy0t4555 (Jul 31, 2011)

rgrwng said:


> i bought one of those anime pillows (dakimakura)earlier this year just so i have something of decent size to hug and sleep with.


Nothing wrong with that.



wootmehver said:


> A hug will not fix my problems. It's not magic.
> 
> Not interested in getting any sort of "charity hug" from a female (or even a male) who is taking pity on me.


Yeah I guess.



KILOBRAVO said:


> Now when I think about how pathetic what Ive just typed is, it makes me feel a bit crap if thats all Ive got to base any feelings of what that type of intimacy must be like.


It's not pathetic at all. It's not your fault. Don't apologise for being you.



Kathykook said:


> You can always get a .....er....doll


Nothing wrong with that either. Someone else already put it in better words but there's no shame in being human and needing human things. I've seen a lot of insensitive crap written about the people who need this type of thing to replace real life girls.. and it's not fair. Just saying.

As it happens I thought about this myself.. but those realistic dolls are damn expensive! 

I guess you aren't going to find a girl open to doing whatever you happen to want i.e. cuddling in bed or something, period. So yeah, much like religious rituals keep people comfortable about their place in heaven and righteousness, experiencing elements of human comfort is a vital thing for human psychology and nothing to be poking fun at people about. Like sexual experiences or anything, really.


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## randomprecision (Aug 19, 2011)

Go to a random funeral. Pretend to be a distraught family friend. Hug random women. Try not to hump their leg.

Not that I would ever do something that creepy.....yet.


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## Toppington (Oct 26, 2011)

randomprecision said:


> Go to a random funeral. Pretend to be a distraught family friend. Hug random women. Try not to hump their leg.
> 
> Not that I would ever do something that creepy.....yet.


You reminded me of the funeral scene from Wedding Crashers. :teeth



Ansgar said:


> Sounds gay.


How insightful. :roll


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## radiancia (Apr 6, 2011)

Dub16 said:


> yer all bananas
> 
> I couldn't disagree more.
> 
> ...


I agree. A lot of the talk here sounds like idealizing and romanticizing things. I can understand if you want these things, but when it starts to turn into desperation - I wonder if its more about trying to get another person to fill a void for you that cant be filled. Human connection is wonderful - of course. But its one of those 'icing' parts of life - makes life better, but icing without a stable and well made cake (i.e. self esteem/happiness) is a bit pointless as well.


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## Jennifer Clayton (Nov 19, 2010)

I constantly feel the need to be held and just talked to sweetly. But who's going to do that. It takes such tremendous effort just to talk to someone, to show them that I like them, and I can't manage to get much response from guys. It feels like I'll be alone forever, starved of any affection.

We could all use hugs!


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

I know what you mean. 

I just want to feel loved.


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## iChoseThisName (Oct 4, 2011)

We all do.


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## successful (Mar 21, 2009)

GPU said:


> you are a female though. i believe you meant to say a man.


lol'd


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## Shredder (Apr 19, 2011)

mysterioussoul said:


> i'm honestly really desperate. i need physical contact. i need a woman and i don't even want sex. i just want her to hold me and tell me everything will be alright.


hmmm I know the feeling. Trouble is I have someone I can hug at anytime. (Im married) I hate saying this as I feel lots of people here will be resentful towards me. I crave touch and connection but then I get so overwhelmed and freak out and I cant do it... I just shy away. It's this that makes me feel like such a freak, monster & loser. Weirdly enough sex is the easy part... it's the deep connection (eg looking into each other eyes or just hugging) that is hard. Im not sure if that makes sense? At times my life feels like one great big confusing paradox.

Nuno expresses it well here: A prisoner, Im the warden too... nothing worse than self made misery.


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## mzmz (Feb 26, 2012)

*fasinating*

the grass is always greener, i guess

I can get sex anytime. Thus, i can get physical contact. Thats not what I crave!

I was with a few guys, either dating or sex, and they never talked to me They would talk about performing/work or just want to make out.

Ijust want someone to talk with, and yeah, it would help if they were attractive, but i honestly i would prefer unattractive guy friends who would speak intelligently then hot guys that just want me around to be a sex doll.


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## HopefulSeeker (Mar 1, 2012)

If I'm feeling overwhelmed with anxiety, then being held by someone who is unconditionally supportive is a very calming, healing experience, and yes, for me, discussion - the quiet whispering into someone's ear about things that really matter - will happen, and if she happens to be completely naked, that's works. There are few better feelings that holding a naked body against your own. Making love will come, but sharing heartfelt thoughts can bring two people very close together on its own. 

But this is about sharing space with someone that you can connect with on an emotional level, not a body that you hire. One of the reasons it is helps me is that you end up focusing on the moment. You're present. Your not thinking about all of the scenarios that are working against you. You're feeling someone's skin, and the heat of their body pressed up against your own. And you're sharing your deepest thoughts. You're fully vulnerable. It's a fine feeling. It definitely reduces tension and anxiety. And it's very human. 


Seeker


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## Genius Next Door (Mar 9, 2012)

Do lingering hugs count as a woman holding a man because I had a friend in college that used to do that all the time. I always just assumed he was either trying to cop a feel or he just wanted to be annoying and make me feel awkward (everyone who knows me know I am NOT touchy feely at all). But looking back, maybe he was like some of you all seeking to be held. 

Even though it's an online forum, I think it's awesome so many people regardless of gender, were able to be vulnerable and admit their desire.


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## NoName99 (Jul 3, 2011)

It's been a while since I've craved this much for physical contact. What a dreadful, desperate feeling.  I hope it'll go away soon and is just caused by the new season. A simple hug would be incredible. It's unbelievable. You'd think I'd be over it by now, having never had any kind of intimate physical or emotional contact with the opposite sex in my life.


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## Taylorshane (Mar 9, 2012)

me too , ive got only a few hugs from females in my life


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## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

Neediness breeds neediness, work on the other aspects of your life that you can change and don't dwell on stuff like this. It's not constructive.


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

my gf has been away for 2 weeks - 3 more weeks to go. it sucks because i can't even begin to go after any other girl for hugs. haha might get a platonic hug tomorrow though, from anx group organizer. she gives good hugs. hrm but its not the same. can't wait for my gf to get back!!!


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## TheQuietGirl20 (Feb 20, 2012)

Me too. A man though lol. I have so much love I want to give. I just want to hold him all day and him hold me.


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## Nerevar (Mar 10, 2012)

Now if everyone on this thread paired up, the problem would be solved


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## AK32 (Sep 2, 2010)

KILOBRAVO said:


> I remember once when I was in college ( aged about 22 I think), and one of my classmates I was sitting next to, lent into me as a kind of friendly hug type thing, (maybe she was tired or something), and I put my arm around her etc.
> 
> This was the only type of physical contact Ive EVER managed to have with a girl, and it felt amazing at the time, just to feel like what it must be like to hold someone in that way, feel their body heat on yours, put your arm around them , and you knew you were like, being accepted and they valued your contact, I did kinda slightly fancy her, which maybe made it feel a bit more for me than it really was.
> 
> Now when I think about how pathetic what Ive just typed is, it makes me feel a bit crap if thats all Ive got to base any feelings of what that type of intimacy must be like.


Don't worry you're not pathedic. I don't have a lot of experience with physical contact either, & the few times I have I felt just as you described.


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## ApathyDivine (Feb 28, 2012)

Me too, I need me a man.
I want someone to just hold me quite badly


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## AK32 (Sep 2, 2010)

TheQuietGirl20 said:


> Me too. A man though lol. I have so much love I want to give. I just want to hold him all day and him hold me.


I know how you feel, I just want to have a guy hold me until kinda lose myself in him, if that makes any since at all.


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## josen (Aug 20, 2011)

i remember this one time when i was 14 i went into sears and this junior or senior who worked there hugged us all and i enjoyed it waaay more than i should have.


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## Durzo (Jun 4, 2011)

wickedlovely said:


> :group
> 
> <3
> 
> ...


Dammit if they dont like sweat pants and athletic wear its a waste of time IMO XD


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## ChrissyQ (Apr 15, 2009)

lol


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## rhames (Feb 27, 2012)

thats about the only thing i miss about my ex... just him hugging n holdin on too me


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## northstar1991 (Oct 4, 2011)

Aww I want the same thing, only with a guy!


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## Peter Attis (Aug 31, 2009)

I think about this a lot, but then I remember that I need to get myself in order first, and it subsides.


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## Black And Mild (Apr 11, 2011)

Wait, hold up. Your profile says that you're a girl....Oh, you a little freaky eh?


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Everyone needs somebody to love.


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## engima (Feb 3, 2009)

I'd have the 'tell me it's ok part' more than the holding to be honest, but both sound good


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## cassie46 (Jan 19, 2011)

im just ready to fall in love again. but i know how you feel. it sucks. just dont settle for anything outta desperation, you'll be more miserable than before.


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## Secretaz (Sep 10, 2011)

I'll give a hug to any of you if you ever want it. Who's going to be the first who get a hug from me?


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## Ashley1990 (Aug 27, 2011)

i want a hug from Santa Clauss!!!!!

hey sweety hugs..all for u..B happy...Free Free Ashley hugs*


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

Secretaz said:


> I'll give a hug to any of you if you ever want it. Who's going to be the first who get a hug from me?


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## Secretaz (Sep 10, 2011)

Rossy said:


>


:squeeze


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

:blush


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

^^ Lucky guy


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## llodell88 (May 15, 2011)

lol this thread just reminded me of this scene from the wedding singer.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

InfiniteBlaze said:


> Do you guys not have mothers that you can hug?


Exactly. Call up mom. They love being needed and wanted. I'm going to see my mom in two weeks! :yes


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## northstar1991 (Oct 4, 2011)

Everything is gonna be all right! :squeeze


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

Great. Now I'm googling cuddling videos:


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## AmericanZero (Apr 17, 2012)

TenYears said:


> Having someone there for you & then losing her is worse. I think it's better to not know what you've lost. It's worse.


Straight up. I think I'm done with the whole "I need someone to love" BS. I'm learning to love myself now because I know I will always be here for myself, but relationships have an OUTRAGEOUS failure rate


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## andy1984 (Aug 18, 2006)

1. wear warm clothes
2. go out in sun
3. pretend like the sun is hugging you


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## Invisigirl (Oct 11, 2011)

Dissonance said:


> I need a creepasaurus rex to hold me so badly.


Rawr!

:squeeze


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## Crystal116 (Apr 28, 2012)

*Maya*



mysterioussoul said:


> i do and i'm fortunate to hug her whenever i want. i usually hug her when i feel down and i imagine hugging a girlfriend.


I like your Maya quote!! If you have money, you can pay for companionship. I don't want to hear it judgmental people, u know it's true.


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## _AJ_ (Jan 23, 2008)

everyone wants this so you would think it would be easy to get as buying gum. But its too bad society is so hate based and makes you jump threw a million hoops to get some love, and everyone just follows along with that hate culture like a bunch of dumb sheep. 

oh well, if ya want it, start jumping threw hoops i guess. 
1st hoop: somehow interact with people and make friends
2nd hoop: hang out with them, and communicate everything to the point that your all tight and ****. 
3rd hoop: discover those in your friend group that wanna hook up, make it so

there ya go, if you can pass those 3 tests you earn the right to love. otherwise you must endure the retarded hate culture that exists for no reason.


but hey, if ya wana avoid the whole thing, get a dog, cause animals arent stupid enough to follow a hate culture


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## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

Isn't the guy supposed to do the holding ? :b



_AJ_ said:


> oh well, if ya want it, start jumping threw hoops i guess.
> 1st hoop: somehow interact with people and make friends
> 2nd hoop: hang out with them, and communicate everything to the point that your all tight and ****.
> 3rd hoop: discover those in your friend group that wanna hook up, make it so


theory is so easy and practice so damn impossible


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## g0t Anxiety (May 16, 2010)

Im very afraid to show or receive any sort of intimacy.. Im afraid a part of me thats hidden, and unseen will want everything from that person and in return i would try and give her everything but then after its all said and done the two of us will still feel smaller than a singularity.. am i the only one?


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## Doriis (Jan 8, 2012)

I feel too awkward hugging someone. My first reaction is always: " Wooo back off ". But then it may be because I never received a real hug :/


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## mysterioussoul (Jul 17, 2010)

now that it's transitioning into winter here the desire to hold a woman is getting stronger.


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## elvin jones (Dec 12, 2011)

Doriis said:


> I feel too awkward hugging someone. My first reaction is always: " Wooo back off ". But then it may be because I never received a real hug :/


A genuine hug is a nice thing. Awkward hugs are that way because it seems like you are just getting felt up.


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## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

I feel uncomfortable hugging family since they don't understand me. The way that people talk to me is really uncalled for. Most people believe that I am stupid and that I don't understand anything. I truly believe this. People tell me that I'm too negative, they bypass talking to me just to talk to my parents. I feel like hugs are superficial to them. Although, there are people that I would very much want to hug since I know that they actually care about me.


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## Bryan108 (Mar 1, 2012)

I hug my puppy whenever I feel down and it cheers me up


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

:cry

Being lonely feels like I'm dying of thirst. I don't know how much longer I can go on like this.


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## loneyakuza (Jun 21, 2012)

I don't need anybody to hold me nor do I really want anybody to. **** society. **** this world. **** everything.


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## Ckg2011 (Aug 9, 2011)

mysterioussoul said:


> i'm honestly really desperate. i need physical contact. i need a woman and i don't even want sex. i just want her to hold me and tell me everything will be alright.


 This is all I dream about at night.

Laying down in bed at night and a girl wrapping her arms around me. An pulling the covers over us while kissing.


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## Hamster12 (Jun 11, 2012)

My sheepdog loves hugs. She's the best cuddler ever.


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## luffy (Jun 2, 2011)

loneyakuza said:


> I don't need anybody to hold me nor do I really want anybody to. **** society. **** this world. **** everything.


why do you want to post on this forum?


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## pineapplebun (Oct 25, 2011)

I hug friends to greet them and to say goodbye, so I don't feel like it's anything special...cuddling is where it's at! haha


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Ckg2011 said:


> This is all I dream about at night.
> 
> Laying down in bed at night and a girl wrapping her arms around me. An pulling the covers over us while kissing.


I feel the same way. I would love to a girl hugging and kissing me.


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## Ckg2011 (Aug 9, 2011)

ravens said:


> I feel the same way. I would love to a girl hugging and kissing me.


 Yeah, it must be amazing.


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## thinkstoomuch101 (Jun 7, 2012)

loneyakuza said:


> I don't need anybody to hold me nor do I really want anybody to. **** society. **** this world. **** everything.


NOOOOO!!

hugs are really okay azuka! i swear they are!!

When i met my best friend of over 30 years, he asked me for a hug. We were in a room full of people, an OverEaters Anonymous meeting. He came toward me while asking.

I looked at him and said: *"One more step, and i'll deck you!" * oke

Yep, it was AWKWARD.. he just shrugged and walked away.. It took several years and lots of work.. But after years, i apologized.. then asked for a hug.. it was scary at first..:um

Now i have friends that i can hug.  hugs are fun, azuka! BUT!!! they have to be from SPECIAL people. You just can't share your energy with everyone..

:hug


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## lizzy19 (Jun 16, 2012)

thinkstoomuch101 said:


> NOOOOO!!
> 
> hugs are really okay azuka! i swear they are!!
> 
> ...


 sweet. ..sometimes i even akward while hugging my best friend I feel bad about it cuz ive backed up a few times :blank


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## ApathyDivine (Feb 28, 2012)

I have to settle for just holding my stuffed pokemon doll at night time


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## remixkilla (Jul 17, 2012)

Silentious said:


> I have to settle for just holding my stuffed pokemon doll at night time


Which type?


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## Ckg2011 (Aug 9, 2011)

Silentious said:


> I have to settle for just holding my stuffed pokemon doll at night time


I use to sleep with this when I was a little kid.









Right around the time of this little doll. 









I'm not so much into cuddling with dolls.


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## yourfavestoner (Jan 14, 2010)

Ape in space said:


> Me 7
> 
> I've developed an unhealthy attachment to a pillow that I've been squeezing every night for at least a month. I imagine it being a girl and going to sleep holding her. Except in these dreams, I'm the one telling her everything will be alright, and I feel better by extension. I look forward to bedtime so that I can see my pillow girl again. And I just realized how pathetic that is. :no


I do the exact same thing. You're not alone. I was never gonna admit to it but you inspired me.

Yeah I don't even care about sex. I just want physical and emotional intimacy. Just to hold a girl in my arms would be euphoric.


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## Ckg2011 (Aug 9, 2011)

yourfavestoner said:


> I do the exact same thing. You're not alone. I was never gonna admit to it but you inspired me.
> 
> Yeah I don't even care about sex. *I just want physical and emotional intimacy. Just to hold a girl in my arms would be euphoric*.


 Got that right. :yes


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

yourfavestoner said:


> I do the exact same thing. You're not alone. I was never gonna admit to it but you inspired me.
> 
> Yeah I don't even care about sex. I just want physical and emotional intimacy. Just to hold a girl in my arms would be euphoric.


It's really common to have a pillow to sleep with in many Asian countries they sometimes call them "Dutch pillows" - a woman would be better, of course, but it's better than nothing.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bolster


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## MrQuiet76 (Aug 26, 2011)

‎"As soon as you realize that you don't need anyone to make it in life, that's your first step towards success." -Vusi Ndlovu


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

I don't think it will ever happen.:cry


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## Chicago Bulls (Jul 7, 2012)

Same here. Its kinda bs really. The only time I get some is when my baby mama picks her cs up lol. Other than that I dont talk to any other females. I mean I do but I never make the attempt to hang out. This SA is a killer.


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## CotLem (Jun 8, 2011)

I used to want someone there for me so bad. But I got over it and now I'm quite the narcissist. I've convinced myself I don't need anyone and have developed a probably unhealthy relationship with being really into myself.


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## AngelClare (Jul 10, 2012)

Kathykook said:


> You can always get a .....er....doll


Ever see the movie Lars and the Real Girl?

A guy buys one of those "realistic dolls" and has a relationship with it. He has this kind of social anxiety. His brother and sister-in-law become concerned. Interesting movie.


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## blue the puppy (Jul 23, 2011)

replace "woman" with "man" and thats all i want


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## TrcyMcgrdy1 (Oct 21, 2011)

Someone mentioned in aother thread the need to get all of us together so we cna meet and match up. Then all of this lonliness will dissapate. So many people need someone, and we are all here...on the internet.


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## DasBoot89 (Mar 20, 2012)

There are alot of people spread out in different areas. I doubt there are many other people, especially the "other sex" located near you.


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## earlgreytea (Jul 11, 2012)

x


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## liz101 (Jan 14, 2012)

Ape in space said:


> Me 7
> 
> I've developed an unhealthy attachment to a pillow that I've been squeezing every night for at least a month. I imagine it being a girl and going to sleep holding her. Except in these dreams, I'm the one telling her everything will be alright, and I feel better by extension. I look forward to bedtime so that I can see my pillow girl again. And I just realized how pathetic that is. :no


lol You're awesome. I'm so glad you had the guts to say that! I never did.


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

Aw man I want to hug a woman so badly. It wouldn't cure my SA, but it would make life much more bearable


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

apx24 said:


> Aw man I want to hug a woman so badly. It wouldn't cure my SA, but it would make life much more bearable


I know man I just want to hug and kiss a woman so badly. It seems like an impossibility that it will ever happen.


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## Disintegration (Sep 8, 2012)

ravens said:


> I don't think it will ever happen.:cry


Don't get discouraged. You still have decades left to live. Anything could happen.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Disintegration said:


> Don't get discouraged. You still have decades left to live. Anything could happen.


It won't happen if I don't ever talk to women. I get so upset with myself not going up to a woman that I find attractive. Women have never approached me except. The only time that girls have approached me was when I was a young kid.


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## TigerB (Apr 7, 2011)

The few times I hugged a girl did feel amazing. And not in a perverted way at all.


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## Disintegration (Sep 8, 2012)

ravens said:


> It won't happen if I don't ever talk to women. I get so upset with myself not going up to a woman that I find attractive. Women have never approached me except. The only time that girls have approached me was when I was a young kid.


If it makes you feel any better, we're in the same boat. 
I'm sorry you feel this way.


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## ravens (Aug 31, 2011)

Disintegration said:


> If it makes you feel any better, we're in the same boat.
> I'm sorry you feel this way.


Who knows maybe one day I will be able to approach someone. My anxiety always gets the better of me though. I don't know what is stronger my fear or the thought of being alone forever. Right now it's the fear that always wins. Years from now I don't want to look back and think that I wasted all those years crippled by the fear of approaching women.


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## rapidfox1 (Sep 13, 2010)

Not me 1.


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## TobeyJuarez (May 16, 2012)

InfiniteBlaze said:


> Do you guys not have mothers that you can hug?


my moms not the huggy type... and even if she was itd just be awkward anyways


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## The Sorrow (Aug 29, 2012)

I never hugged a girl, except sister and mom and like this.


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## NekoCat (Jan 26, 2015)

Sometimes it's hard to say these things, I don't want a girlfriend or a love interest all I want is someone to hold me and just tell me everything is going to be okay. I never get the feeling of security that I seek from my mother and am struggling with this a lot at the moment.


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## FrostLily (Feb 20, 2015)

Can definitely identify with this feeling big time.There's something so wonderful about the softness and gentleness a good natured woman can bestow upon a soul in need of love and assurance. How I wish I had a woman in my life who would come over after I had a rough day and just wrap her arms around me, and tell me its going to get better. The comfort that came from her soft voice in my ear, her beautiful aroma, her loving touch, ( and maybe her kisses if I was lucky  ) would be like an oasis in the desert of my life.Oh how I wish...


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## Imbored21 (Jun 18, 2012)

Pretty much would cure me of depression. It would also motivate me a lot more to work on my anxiety.


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## black eye (Feb 14, 2015)

Imbored21 said:


> Pretty much would cure me of depression. It would also motivate me a lot more to work on my anxiety.


I think that's wishful thinking.

If you are not there for yourself, 
then being with a girl wont make that hole in the soul magically dissapear.

And if you are there for yourself,
then the need for the other person is no longer there.

Not saying attraction and sex drive disapears, because these are biological impulses. But there are other ways to fix that, unless you are a member of the NoFap mafia.

I look forward to spend the rest of my days alone,
or spend them with a girl i really really like.

I have conformed too much in my life, and being with a partner thats not totally my thing is the ultimate drainage of the soul.


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## probably offline (Oct 8, 2012)




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## The Sleeping Dragon (Sep 29, 2011)

To bad because desperation and clingy behavior drives people away. This is probably why most of us are always single. You can almost smell desperation. The way somebody looks, the way somebody walks, the way they hold themselves.

And as 'black eye' pointed out it will not fix your problems. No, it will make it even more obvious and the relationship will probably fail because some put women on such a pedestal that they thing women (or guys) are the cure. I've been guilty of that too. I've let that go though, or trying to at least.

*How can you expect to be loved if you don't love yourself? * Most of us have a deep self loathing, or at least that is what I pick up on this site, myself included. I think this is the deeper issue.


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## 7th.Streeter (May 11, 2011)

InfiniteBlaze said:


> Do you guys not have mothers that you can hug?


 LOLOLOl

Im hella done XDDD

only in SAS ..


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## 7th.Streeter (May 11, 2011)

The Sleeping Dragon said:


> To bad because desperation and clingy behavior drives people away. This is probably why most of us are always single. *You can almost smell desperation. The way somebody looks, the way somebody walks, the way they hold themselves*.
> 
> And as 'black eye' pointed out it will not fix your problems.* No, it will make it even more obvious and the relationship will probably fail because some put women on such a pedestal that they thing women (or guys) are the cure. I've been guilty of that too. I've let that go though, or trying to at least.
> *
> *How can you expect to be loved if you don't love yourself? *Most of us have a deep self loathing, or at least that is what I pick up on this site, myself included. I think this is the deeper issue.


 Man this whole reply is so on point.

I think abt that (like desperation or w/e coming off) when ever I walk,talk ect..

Idk why but despite my best efforts.. my BEST.. I wear my heart on my sleeve... like for the life of me, I can't front.

here are sme examples...

when I was in my comp class, and I finally made a friend..and another dude starts talking t my friend... I was a little pissed b/c I waslike.. I just made a friend..and now you trying to steal em' XD

and my friend was like.. you looking hella sour XDDD

and I was..

then @ Walmart, like when I was getting back.. and I was just being negative..like I was thinking.. why doesn' t the guy I like give me the time of day, what am I gonna do abt a job... I want to be better.. why am I loser XD...

and some dude walks ups,,and is like.. ur too pretty not be smiling.. that's a problem...

Then at work, I just walked in(this was a while ago) ... w/ a straight face...
and my coworker(she's so sweet ^^) was like "smile Brittany, smile,smile) XD

Idk man.. I guess I have that resting bxtch face or something...

or I guess my thoughts are hyper reflected through my body.. despite my best efforts..

I need to study body language and change mine..

I hate that I wear my heart on my sleeve..

I want peeps to stop thinking , if I don't smile..Im gonna jump..
or Im sad...

even if I am sad.. I don't want you to know..

Body... why do you betray me Lol

woe is me XD


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## The Sleeping Dragon (Sep 29, 2011)

Don't forget most of our communication is non-verbal. But you can always fake it till you make it. I try to have a good posture and walk with my chin up. Walk proud, even if you don't feel like it. Sometimes it helps me. I want to show the world I don't care, that I'm here!


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## reaffected (Sep 3, 2011)

Ckg2011 said:


> I use to sleep with this when I was a little kid.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Lol


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## 7th.Streeter (May 11, 2011)

black eye said:


> I think that's wishful thinking.
> 
> *If you are not there for yourself,
> then being with a girl wont make that hole in the soul magically dissapear*.
> ...


 So very true, and if another person did fill that void.. just imagine if they left.. my mom works in a hospital, so she sees a lot.. and she told me this story abt this patient she had last night..

her husband of 28 yrs left her..and she could never get over it.. so she drank and did cocaine.. nowthey're giving her 6 mo's to live..

and she's leaving behind a 21 yr old son who wants nothing to do w/ her and a 16 yr old daughter..

and my mom's response (which I heavily agree w/ ^^)

Humans be damned lol..

meaning.. my mom..nor I would ever let someone... one sole person just drive me to drink and drug myself to numb the pain when im not on your mind and your not losing a wink of sleep over me..

hell no....

but I do understand that the heart wants what it wants...
Love is a hell of a thing yo..

it can mess you up properly lol

That's why.. why Im all vulnerable.. I can't fuks w/ love rn XD


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## mjkittredge (Sep 8, 2012)

FrostLily said:


> Can definitely identify with this feeling big time.There's something so wonderful about the softness and gentleness a good natured woman can bestow upon a soul in need of love and assurance. How I wish I had a woman in my life who would come over after I had a rough day and just wrap her arms around me, and tell me its going to get better. The comfort that came from her soft voice in my ear, her beautiful aroma, her loving touch, ( and maybe her kisses if I was lucky  ) would be like an oasis in the desert of my life.Oh how I wish...


That was beautiful the way you wrote that


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## FrostLily (Feb 20, 2015)

mjkittredge said:


> That was beautiful the way you wrote that


Thank you! I guess it's easier to speak from the heart when you don't have to fear the consequences of being misunderstood or ridiculed by someone in person.


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## FrostLily (Feb 20, 2015)

probably offline said:


>


Beautiful <3


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## Riri11 (Mar 24, 2013)

id hug you but then you'll fall in love with me and I won't know what to do


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## FrostLily (Feb 20, 2015)

mysterioussoul said:


> now that it's transitioning into winter here the desire to hold a woman is getting stronger.


Totally understand this feeling, I always crave this type of connectedness most strongly during the autumn and winter months.Would love few things more than to just spend all day laying in bed in a lady's arms on a cold, snowy day just feeling her warmth, listening to the crackling of the fireplace and watching the snow fall through the window. *sigh* :mushy


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

I don't mind being kidnaped by a hot chick.


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## chompers (Feb 3, 2015)

Sugarslippers said:


> Man this whole reply is so on point.
> 
> and some dude walks ups,,and is like.. ur too pretty not be smiling.. that's a problem...
> 
> ...


I HATE it when other people tell me to smile. I know I have resting b*tch face, so wtf is it to you



I don't think people are caring about you when they tell you what you should do with your own face... I think it just makes them uncomfortable, or they can't think of anything not stupid to say


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## knightofdespair (May 20, 2014)

Riri11 said:


> id hug you but then you'll fall in love with me and I won't know what to do


We'd have fun figuring it out










Everything's coming up Milhouse!


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## chompers (Feb 3, 2015)

The Sleeping Dragon said:


> To bad because desperation and clingy behavior drives people away. This is probably why most of us are always single. You can almost smell desperation. The way somebody looks, the way somebody walks, the way they hold themselves.
> 
> And as 'black eye' pointed out it will not fix your problems. No, it will make it even more obvious and the relationship will probably fail because some put women on such a pedestal that they thing women (or guys) are the cure. I've been guilty of that too. I've let that go though, or trying to at least.
> 
> *How can you expect to be loved if you don't love yourself? * Most of us have a deep self loathing, or at least that is what I pick up on this site, myself included. I think this is the deeper issue.


This - especially the last paragraph - is 100% true

Love doesn't solve all your problems and it doesn't fix what's wrong with you. Nothing does. All you can do is work on it.


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## Flashcard (Feb 20, 2015)

I hate that. And not just that, they say my face is too white and it is scary. It is not even white like you cant see my veins or anything. I just didnt get enough sleep. And when i say that they ask nosily why I never get enough sleep. Because i dont. And they start teasing in a way they think is friendly. It is not friendly anymore, it is getting to me like it did a few years ago before I started thinking I did not have anxiety anymore.


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

I don't know, I think I can expect to be loved without loving myself in return.


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## social worker (Sep 15, 2014)

minimized said:


> I don't know, I think I can expect to be loved without loving myself in return.


Yeah, you can be loved without loving yourself, but without self-compassion, love for someone else will be shaky at best--that kind of one-sided relationship is doomed. Sorry, but all of you that want a long-term, emotionally intimate relationship, that's where it's gotta start.


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## mjkittredge (Sep 8, 2012)

sas111 said:


> Me 4
> 
> What are you gonna do about it though, life goes on. I'd like more than just a cuddle buddy however. :teeth


more than a cuddle buddy? Whatever do you mean?


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## HyperGiant (Feb 23, 2015)

Done a bit of thought on hugs. .. I realized i was thirsty and admitted that i could do with a drink. Unfortunately I was surrounded buy *******s at the time an was given a Dr pepper (yuck) then a veggie smoothie (yuck yuck), than a glass of mud (huh?) then some sensible person offered me a bloody Mary (hum) - well i was tabasco sauce. Probably off topic but tears well in my eyes whenever I gloss over a lingerie catalog and I see her in a teddy.


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## forgetmylife (Oct 1, 2011)

uhh...

plz?


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## bfs (Jan 9, 2015)

I've always wanted to get hugged. I just never had someone for the job


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## TigerLilly999 (Jan 18, 2016)

I would like a guy to hug me in a special way... I grew up in a family of only girls. And I've never had a close guy friend. I want to know what it feels like, I want to feel warm and safe... I want someone to be gentle, and hold my boobs and touch my face and whisper in my ear ... so I can kiss him on the cheek and the lips and forehead .. the people in my life all hate men, and I hate it.. Because they tell me lies, but I know I will have someone perfect one day


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## TheAmorri (Feb 2, 2015)

Go look for her dude(s)! and ladies toooo!







) Everyone should feel that feel!


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## 629753 (Apr 7, 2015)

I just want a bj


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