# Girls, how do you like to be kissed?



## NoName99 (Jul 3, 2011)

I'm curious... I've just had my first kiss last week (yay!), but I need a few pointers, ideas, etc. In essence, I need a crash course... 

How do you like to be kissed? What are your dream scenarios? Where? When? Smoothly, harshly, spontaneously... what else? And I mean not with some random guy, but with someone you're dating and are attracted to. Be graphic! :b


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## Reppyboyo (Dec 10, 2012)

Just go with the flow dude.
Its quite a natural thing, I think its fairly hard to be a bad kisser unless you slobber everywhere.

(I realise you wanted girls to answer this but I thought id pitch in my 2 pence anyways)


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## LostProphet (Apr 4, 2010)

If you aren't sure what to do, a good general rule of thumb is to try emulate what the other person is doing (especially if they are more experienced at it). Also don't get too caught up in trying to think of moves to do, remember to relax and enjoy it


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## Unknown88 (Aug 21, 2012)

Don't attack her with your tongue. I think kisses are awesome both soft and intense, but it's always better when tongue is subtle. Other than that I'd say it's fairly simple, honestly if you're unsure due to lack of experience you can follow the other person's lead.

Also make sure your breath is fresh.


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## lonelygirl88 (Dec 25, 2009)

Nothing sloppy or too wet. Treat your tongue like a paintbrush and be delicate and seductive. Pay attention to what your doing. Don't just put it all over the place with no direction. Follow their lead and whatever they are doing. Treat them like a mirror. What they are doing is probably what they like.


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## awkwardsilent (Jun 14, 2012)

I don't have much experience but... too much tongue is just... bad...


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## tbyrfan (Feb 24, 2011)

Don't try to eat the other person's face. :teeth


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## BrookeHannigan (Mar 29, 2012)

Soft and slowly


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## au Lait (Sep 8, 2010)

You should really have this discussion with the girl you're actually kissing, rather than a group of girls who most likely have different preferences. What she likes may be very different from the answers you receive here.


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## lonelygirl88 (Dec 25, 2009)

au Lait said:


> You should really have this discussion with the girl you're actually kissing, rather than a group of girls who most likely have different preferences. What she likes may be very different from the answers you receive here.


That's why I, among others, said to follow the other person's lead. That is typically the best advice. Sometimes having this discussion can kill a mood or give off a bad impression that you don't know how to kiss. Normally people don't discuss it... at least I've never seen that done.


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## rymo (Sep 6, 2009)

If I don't like how a girl is kissing I'll give her advice. The discussion might be slightly awkward for like 2 seconds, but once you get back into kissing that awkwardness washes away instantly. And it's totally worth it instead of sitting there worrying every time. In OP's case, he's the one who wants advice, but I think it's still worth asking. "So..how do you like being kissed?" Bing bang boom.


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## Visionary (Apr 13, 2010)

I like being bit... soo..lol


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## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)

what's a kiss?


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## NoName99 (Jul 3, 2011)

rymo said:


> If I don't like how a girl is kissing I'll give her advice. The discussion might be slightly awkward for like 2 seconds, but once you get back into kissing that awkwardness washes away instantly. And it's totally worth it instead of sitting there worrying every time. In OP's case, he's the one who wants advice, but I think it's still worth asking. "So..how do you like being kissed?" Bing bang boom.


I intend to do that, and it won't be awkward at all after everything we've already talked about 

The purpose of this thread is to get more ideas.


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## pineapplebun (Oct 25, 2011)

People gave good advice, to just follow the other person's lead or just straight up ask what their preferences are. After all, communication is key  I could say I don't like french kissing but maybe the girl you like does.


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## hypestyle (Nov 12, 2003)

...Just wish I had a girlfriend so I could find out first-hand..


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## DS29790bb (Dec 31, 2011)

Hate to hijack your thread, but how did it go? Was kissing easier than you thought?

Just nervous because I've never kissed a girl before but I think I will be soon, so I just wanna hear first hand. So nervous about totally messing it up, because at my age, every girl has kissed before. Sorry I have no advice or anything.


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## CumulusCongestus (Jul 2, 2012)

I don't think I can add much to that which has already been said.

So I'll just say you could always try kissing her like she's never been kissed before.









 .... on second thought....


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## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

Well I hate it when guys would pick me up. That happened on both of my dates. They would just lift me up and I'm just like "put me down." haha that's what happens because I'm short. But I like to makeout in a secluded area. Just the two of us. NO ONE AROUND. I don't really like french kissing. It's a little weird for me and I don't like lip biting either.. but that's because it hurt when it happened to me.


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## LostProphet (Apr 4, 2010)

CumulusCongestus said:


>


hahahaha.



Paloma M said:


> Well I hate it when guys would pick me up. That happened on both of my dates. They would just lift me up and I'm just like "put me down." haha that's what happens because I'm short. But I like to makeout in a secluded area. Just the two of us. NO ONE AROUND. I don't really like french kissing. It's a little weird for me and I don't like lip biting either.. but that's because it hurt when it happened to me.


Just curious why is it you don't like being picked up? I love picking up girls.

As for the lip biting... sounds like the guy wasn't doing it right. It shouldn't be painful whatsoever (unless it's super intense animalistic making out where things might get out of hand, or if the person likes it like that).


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I'd imagine Portugal is similar to Brazil and Bolivia. People there kiss in public all the time. At first I was like woah...calm down but I came to like it. And Brazilians shove the tongue in immediately and really go at it. American guys are slower and more gradual with the tongue. 

I like kissing while standing the most (much more than while sitting or lying down). Having their body up against you is hot. I also like some biting. One of the better make out sessions that I had....the next day I ended up with sort of purplish lips.


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## dingleberryz (Nov 7, 2012)

We like being kissed with wet slobbery lips that devour our lips and face


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## Lelsey (Feb 7, 2011)

Am i the only one here who prefers a peck on the lip? childish i know..


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## Freiheit (Dec 8, 2008)

Well everyone likes different things. My dream scenario would be a soft beginning and hardcore end. Hold her nice and tight around her waist. And control your saliva because it can become gross if it's sloppy.


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## Kittycatt (Dec 7, 2012)

Passionately. Boys don't be sloppy and rough. Take your time. My favorite kisses are the slow ones. The close your eyes, have your hands on each other; face, body, whatever. Slowly coming into a kiss.. that is a powerful kiss. And you know what I hated about my ex? Every time we start to kiss he thinks it has to lead to more -- guys sometimes we just want to make out -.-


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## MiMiK (Aug 25, 2011)

Visionary said:


> I like being bit... soo..lol


no way! :clap


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## LostProphet (Apr 4, 2010)

Yeah really intense kissing can result in some lip bruising with all the suction going on lol.

Once my ex and she bit and pulled my lip so hard while drunk. I honestly thought my lips were going to tear off. It hurt like hell. I was like WTF?


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## HustleRose (Jun 19, 2009)

Build-up... start slow and soft, then throw me on the bed and kiss me everywhere. I also enjoy taking charge.

As some others have said, you should be talking about this with the girl. Unless you just wanted to share with everyone you recently had your first kiss, in which case, congrats.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

LostProphet said:


> Yeah really intense kissing can result in some lip bruising with all the suction going on lol.
> 
> Once my ex and she bit and pulled my lip so hard while drunk. I honestly thought my lips were going to tear off. It hurt like hell. I was like WTF?


Oh jesus. I've never had that happen. Only bad thing that I can recall with biting is I had one guy bite BOTH lips (upper and lower at once). Horrible!! I didn't kiss him after that and soon tried to get rid of him.


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## LostProphet (Apr 4, 2010)

komorikun said:


> Oh jesus. I've never had that happen. Only bad thing that I can recall with biting is I had one guy bite BOTH lips (upper and lower at once). Horrible!! I didn't kiss him after that and soon tried to get rid of him.


Yeah it was really bad. Good thing that was only a one time thing lol. Your experience sounds very unpleasant as well. I like light/teasing biting, not biting that will cause me pain and make me thing I'm going to need to pass by the emergency room.


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## gusstaf (Jan 1, 2012)

It's different for every person, but for me, build-up and anticipation are as important as the kiss itself. And echoing what everyone else has said: no shoving your tongue down her throat!! uke


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## evginmubutu (Sep 12, 2011)

it's just one of those things isn't it...not gonna learn on an internet forum. been about 6 months since my last kiss but from what i can remember it is great and you really need to match the energy of your partner. i.e. if you just started kissing 2 seconds ago probably don't want to wedge your toungue in forcefully or start a dental exploration.

edit: woops i'm not a girl but hey advice is advice


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## NoName99 (Jul 3, 2011)

DS29790bb said:


> Hate to hijack your thread, but how did it go? Was kissing easier than you thought?
> 
> Just nervous because I've never kissed a girl before but I think I will be soon, so I just wanna hear first hand. So nervous about totally messing it up, because at my age, every girl has kissed before. Sorry I have no advice or anything.


Well, it's more or less like what I imagined it would be. It's strange, but good strange -- an I'm-curious-want-to-do-it-again kind of strange. And again, and again... But she knew I'd never kissed before. She asked if she could kiss me. Then she kissed me  I could've never taken the initiative. Would have been too nervous.


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## NoName99 (Jul 3, 2011)

HustleRose said:


> Build-up... start slow and soft, then throw me on the bed and kiss me everywhere. I also enjoy taking charge.
> 
> As some others have said, you should be talking about this with the girl. Unless you just wanted to share with everyone you recently had your first kiss, in which case, congrats.


I've talked about it with her, I want my fellow SAers' input on the matter _and_ I also wanted to share I had my first kiss. Thanks by the way!


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## NoName99 (Jul 3, 2011)

komorikun said:


> I'd imagine Portugal is similar to Brazil and Bolivia. People there kiss in public all the time. At first I was like woah...calm down but I came to like it. And Brazilians shove the tongue in immediately and really go at it. American guys are slower and more gradual with the tongue.
> 
> I like kissing while standing the most (much more than while sitting or lying down). Having their body up against you is hot. I also like some biting. One of the better make out sessions that I had....the next day I ended up with sort of purplish lips.


Kissing in public is normal, yes. In fact we were kissing in public soon after that first kiss. Shoving the tongue in immediately, don't know, but didn't happen (immediately). Biting, apparently she likes it too, and so do I...


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

tbyrfan said:


> Don't try to eat the other person's face. :teeth


Meaning don't do this:






:b


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## Unknown88 (Aug 21, 2012)

lonelygirl88 said:


> That's why I, among others, said to follow the other person's lead. That is typically the best advice. Sometimes having this discussion can kill a mood or give off a bad impression that you don't know how to kiss. Normally people don't discuss it... at least I've never seen that done.


Yeah I would find it a mood killer if the guy suddenly paused and said "Ok, so should I start gently? Tongue or no tongue? Here...please select your kissing options on this handy form before we begin." Following the other person's lead is a safe option if you feel lost.


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## Milco (Dec 12, 2009)

Unknown88 said:


> Yeah I would find it a mood killer if the guy suddenly paused and said "Ok, so should I start gently? Tongue or no tongue? Here...please select your kissing options on this handy form before we begin." Following the other person's lead is a safe option if you feel lost.


"Alright, Ms. *reads* Swanson. Your kiss should be with you in 2 to 3 weeks."


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

Be creative. A mouth, lips, tongue, spit, lol are all your tools to play.. Just play, lol And you can do lot of things meanwhile kissing to give it different spices.. Also you can use spices in your mouth :b Suck and pull and do what ever, it is not so serious...


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## Motionless Sway (May 30, 2011)

SnowFlakesFire said:


> Be creative. A mouth, lips, tongue, spit, lol are all your tools to play.. Just play, lol And you can do lot of things meanwhile kissing to give it different spices.. Also you can use spices in your mouth :b Suck and pull and do what ever, it is not so serious...


Okay, so when I kiss a girl for her 47th time (her being non-SA), how shall I kiss her?


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

Motionless Sway said:


> Okay, so when I kiss a girl for her 47th time (her being non-SA), how shall I kiss her?


How should I know I havent kissed with you, I don't know how you use your stuff and if I would like something your current girl would like something else. Just be open mouthed and creative and try everything what would feel good.

You have another pair of lips there.. That is just a play with you 2... Sometimes we do kisses by turns.. I kiss first, try something and he says does he want more or not. Then he kisses me and I say do I want more that or not.. If you have got a date/girlfriend don't you ever just.. spend time by kissing? To get to know both of your lips and skills?

Just play with your mouths people :b

I personally like tongue play but not all girls like that. So you must.. get to know what you 2 like *together*  If one is good of sucking it can be with other partner that does not work at all.. Lips and mouths are different but... Just kiss people, kiss, kiss more!

And if that is first kiss with her it does not have to be anything extreme.


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## LostProphet (Apr 4, 2010)

Unknown88 said:


> Yeah I would find it a mood killer if the guy suddenly paused and said "Ok, so should I start gently? Tongue or no tongue? Here...please select your kissing options on this handy form before we begin." Following the other person's lead is a safe option if you feel lost.


So true, that can definitely ruin the mood lol


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

I'm a dude but I wanna weigh in..

I prefer not to use tongue. It can get nasty during an extended session too with the level of saliva. But a girl commented once that I'm kinda of a "cheap" kisser. I think she was referring to me not using tongue very much. Sometimes tongue kissing can be hot if it's coordinated properly but not too much.

I'm of Portuguese descent so yeah being a cheap kisser is probably a disgrace to my heritage or something. I also don't like french kissing in public. I have before when I was a teenager. It's awkward.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

I used to be sort of indifferent towards kissing. I liked it but nothing extreme. That all changed after living in South America. They are just sooo into it and have really long make out sessions in public all the time. Almost all of them use lots of tongue. I never had a problem with too much saliva or whatever. If it gets too wet you just stop and wipe your mouth and then go for more.


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## Motionless Sway (May 30, 2011)

SnowFlakesFire said:


> How should I know I havent kissed with you, I don't know how you use your stuff and if I would like something your current girl would like something else. Just be open mouthed and creative and try everything what would feel good.
> 
> You have another pair of lips there.. That is just a play with you 2... Sometimes we do kisses by turns.. I kiss first, try something and he says does he want more or not. Then he kisses me and I say do I want more that or not.. If you have got a date/girlfriend don't you ever just.. spend time by kissing? To get to know both of your lips and skills?
> 
> ...


It was more rhetorical since I didn't expect you to answer. Being Latin, I use my tongue when the kissing/relationship gets serious, but I never attack and wanna use my tongue-karate skillz


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## Motionless Sway (May 30, 2011)

komorikun said:


> I used to be sort of indifferent towards kissing. I liked it but nothing extreme. That all changed after living in South America. They are just sooo into it and have really long make out sessions in public all the time. Almost all of them use lots of tongue. I never had a problem with too much saliva or whatever. If it gets too wet you just stop and wipe your mouth and then go for more.


lol, that's awesome, it reminds me of when I visited family in Mexico and when a couple of my cousins were making out with their girls. Quality check and dive back in!


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

komorikun said:


> I used to be sort of indifferent towards kissing. I liked it but nothing extreme. That all changed after living in South America. They are just sooo into it and have really long make out sessions in public all the time. Almost all of them use lots of tongue. I never had a problem with too much saliva or whatever. If it gets too wet you just stop and wipe your mouth and then go for more.


It's odd how the saliva thing weirds me out. Yet I have no problem with oral sex (giving and receiving), anal sex and even analingus. Hygiene is of utmost importance. But a person most of the time isn't going to be fresh down there unless they took a shower/bath or used baby wipes not long ago. Ditto for myself.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

phoenixwright said:


> It's odd how the saliva thing weirds me out. Yet I have no problem with oral sex (giving and receiving), anal sex and even analingus. Hygiene is of utmost importance. But a person most of the time isn't going to be fresh down there unless they took a shower/bath or used baby wipes not long ago. Ditto for myself.


Yeah, who knows. I like sex and penis very much but semen disgusts me. Luckily you only see it at the very end.


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

Motionless Sway said:


> , but I never attack and wanna use my tongue-karate skillz


What about if she likes karate? It would be a good game to know who is getting a black belt with last breath :b


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## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

Just let it happen naturally and you'll get the feel of what she likes. It's something you shouldn't think about too much unless she tells you that you're a bad kisser. 
And the feel of the moment makes the kisses different.


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## Lelsey (Feb 7, 2011)

callalilly26 said:


> Just let it happen naturally and you'll get the feel of what she likes. It's something you shouldn't think about too much unless she tells you that you're a bad kisser.
> And the feel of the moment makes the kisses different.


 see you here again, you really should start a dating blog ^^


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## Lelsey (Feb 7, 2011)

phoenixwright said:


> I'm a dude but I wanna weigh in..
> 
> I prefer not to use tongue. It can get nasty during an extended session too with the level of saliva. But a girl commented once that I'm kinda of a "cheap" kisser. I think she was referring to me not using tongue very much. Sometimes tongue kissing can be hot if it's coordinated properly but not too much.
> 
> I'm of Portuguese descent so yeah being a cheap kisser is probably a disgrace to my heritage or something. I also don't like french kissing in public. I have before when I was a teenager. It's awkward.


I'm a girl and i have the same feeling, i hate too much tongue too. the level of saliva makes me uncomfortable. French kisses most of the time make me feel suffocated and not in a good way. once i even felt a mini panic attack.... i'm starting to think if there is something wrong with me.


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## Cnidaria (Dec 13, 2012)

One of the worst things to to is just shove your tongue in her mouth straight away, it's so off putting :no I actually like tongue, but if I feel it before I feel lips that's not a good thing. Also once a guy actually licked my face after we kissed. No. It was so weird.

Those were only 2 occasions though, just do what feels natural. Then again I'm always the 'kissee' so I just go with what the other person is doing.


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## Royals (Jul 20, 2012)

Kissing is such a weird phenomen. Animals never kiss. Someone sticking their tongue into your mouth. What a surprise! And when to stop, or go on, press hard or slow, lips on each other or around each other? Hehe. So I agree it has to go automatically. But yes kissing softly and gently not with force or anything weird


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## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

lol. I really should consider it  Thank you. I've had enough experience dating for a lifetime, but unfortunately I haven't found *the one* yet. Hopefully soon!


Lelsey said:


> see you here again, you really should start a dating blog ^^


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## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

Agreed. A few weeks ago I went on a first date and the guy stuck his tongue in my mouth first. It wasn't very appealing and the fact that he did it so soon when I was trying to give him a kiss on the cheek really was off-putting. Guys: DO NOT do that. Take my advice from what I said initially, but please, for the love of God...do not dive in tongue first.



Cnidaria said:


> One of the worst things to to is just shove your tongue in her mouth straight away, it's so off putting :no I actually like tongue, but if I feel it before I feel lips that's not a good thing. Also once a guy actually licked my face after we kissed. No. It was so weird.
> 
> Those were only 2 occasions though, just do what feels natural. Then again I'm always the 'kissee' so I just go with what the other person is doing.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

callalilly26 said:


> Agreed. A few weeks ago I went on a first date and the guy stuck his tongue in my mouth first. It wasn't very appealing and the fact that he did it so soon when I was trying to give him a kiss on the cheek really was off-putting. Guys: DO NOT do that. Take my advice from what I said initially, but please, for the love of God...do not dive in tongue first.


You have to build up to the tongue kiss. Like a crescendo. Don't just dive right in there. Just like how people french kiss on TV and in movies.

Where was this when he tried to tongue kiss? Am I off-base for thinking that french kissing in public is taboo? I've done so in public before as a teenager. But yeah other than that, I am too uncomfortable to do that sort of thing in public.


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## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

It was in his car because he was driving me back to mine. I love french kissing, but you are correct about it being like a crescendo...you do have build it up.



phoenixwright said:


> You have to build up to the tongue
> kiss. Like a crescendo. Don't just dive right in there. Just like how people french kiss on TV and in movies.
> 
> Where was this when he tried to tongue kiss? Am I off-base for thinking that french kissing in public is taboo? I've done so in public before as a teenager. But yeah other than that, I am too uncomfortable to do that sort of thing in public.


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

Royals said:


> Kissing is such a weird phenomen. Animals never kiss. Someone sticking their tongue into your mouth. What a surprise! And when to stop, or go on, press hard or slow, lips on each other or around each other? Hehe. So I agree it has to go automatically. But yes kissing softly and gently not with force or anything weird


Oh yes they do kiss!!!!

And dogs even are able to give tongue kisses for people if you let them, they lick your face and if your mouth is open, it is in your mouth in a second, lol Never laugh next to dogs tongue...


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