# Do you hate people touching your belongings?



## nemesis1

I've always absolutely despised people touching or using my stuff. I hate lending my things out to people and will almost always try and get out of it if someone asks if they can borrow something from me, especially clothing or other personal items. When I've lived with other people when I was younger, I noticed a few times that my things had been moved so I knew someone had gone through my stuff which i was seething at. Nothing was stolen, but that's not the point. Sometimes they would even blatantly just take stuff out of my room when I wasn't there and say "I didn't think you would mind". I could just about tolerate immediate family members touching my things, but people I'm not related to? Hell no. And not asking permission either just drives me insane. Its like a total invasion of my privacy with no regard.

People cant understand why i get like this over my things, and neither can I tbh. 'Normal people' don't seem to be bothered about stuff like this, but i really am. But I'm guessing a lot of SA sufferers are like this about their belongs too, right?


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## Innamorata

Yeah pretty much. I have some mugs for drinks which I hate other people using. Even family members. It's stupid but I still get upset.


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## BeaT

I particularly hate people using my phone or my computer. My one (ex)friend was all into fantasy football and **** and wanted to use my lap top for it all the god damn time. I've got embarrassing **** on my computer(not all of it porn) and it makes me nervous as hell to have somebody messing with my computer. But I let him use it anyway cause I can't assert myself at all in situations like that.

Also I have drugs and paraphernalia and porn and embarrassing books and **** hidden all over my room so it freaks me out anytime anybody messes with my stuff when i'm not there. I too get really pissed to discover stuff in the slightly wrong place and realize somebody has been through my ****.


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## rgrwng

yeah i don't invite people over to my place anymore - i am very bossy when it comes to stuff in my home. i tell people to relax, and next thing they got their feet on my cushions, things out of order, and when i specify that they need to take whatever they brought home with them, they leave it for me to clean up. 

idk when i get invited to other homes, i never jump into couches, or put my feet up on stuff. whatever i bring with me to the party comes home with me from the party - i think it's a nice gesture to relieve the cleanup process for the host. i never touch their things unless they tell me to, and learn to look and admire with my eyes instead of hands.

i guess i am too stupid for nice, while the rest of the world doesn't care about other people's things.


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## RetroDoll

yes, I'm pretty territorial. One time at college I went back in the laundry room and some girl was folding & sorting my stuff from the dryer. I was like :blank... I have a very visceral reaction to people messing with my things unexpectedly.


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## confidentwallflower

I don't experience anything like that. It sounds more symptomatic of OCD, which is still in the same ball park when it comes to anxiety/common psychological ailments.


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## Syndacus

I can be territorial, but since I live with a roommate and I can trust him with stuff, I let him use whatever. Most people, touch my stuff, I'm gonna kick your ***.


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## merryk

Growing up as the only child in the house, I didn't learn first-hand about sharing my stuff: like having people want to borrow it or helping themselves to it.

Was surprised to see so many girls in my college freshman dorm borrowing each others' clothes, sometimes without even asking first. I wasn't down with that :um


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## talkswithkeyboard

I guess I have trust issues or something because I cannot lend anything to my school friends, especially notes, even though that's supposedly the whole point of making friends in college. I absolutely* HATE *it when people write on my notes right in front of me. It's just so frustrating trying to be neat, only to have someone ruin it with a stroke of a pen.

In high school, I lost a pencil probably every week because of some random person asking for one and then running off with it after the class was over.

I'm not sure how other people were raised but I do have a couple school friends who randomly start going through my bag and binder while I'm trying to pay attention in class. Now I keep it zipped up and on the floor... (I can't block the seat next to me anymore)


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## EagerMinnow84

Yes, but it depends on the person. 

I hated when my cousins would play with my toys when we were kids because they, actually one of them, would take off the clothes of my dolls, color sloppily in my coloring books, using crayons so they would cease on being pointy, take out ponytails and braids out of the hair of my dolls. 

Now, all I ask of people is to put back my things where they found them.


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## alwaysmistaken

I usually dont like people touching particular stuff that I own.. but it all depends on the person, if its someone im close to I wont mind as much. I have one friend who always wants to borrow something of mind and I never have the balls to say no because I dont want to hurt her feelings or start a fight. The only reason why I dont like her borrowing my stuff is because she doesnt take care of anything thats hers. I know when and if I get it back that its going to be ruined. Ive also been away for weekends and had people staying at my place and Ive come home to find stuff of mine broken but hidden in my room in hope that I wouldnt find it.. that really annoyed me because I knew people had been in my room and they didnt have the decency to apologise for breaking my stuff. Ive also had stuff stolen from my room and Ive known who has done it, confronted them (because it was sentimental) and they flat out denied it. Sometimes I've considered getting a massive lock for my bedroom door so if im not home, no one can go in. Typing all of this is making me angry, so Ill stop now!!


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## nycdude

Not really, they just need to be careful with my things.


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## regimes

oh, definitely.
i am super territorial. if someone comes into my room without me inviting them- even my mom- i bristle and get cranky and want them to leave. i put tape around all 132 of my colored pencils in art class so that i would know where my pencils are- and kept a long list of them to check every once in a while if i still had them. people in my car drive me crazy cause they tend to leave trash and belongings. people don't touch my books cause they'll fold the corners down or bend the binds too much or worse, write in them. i'd rather you didn't grab my electronic and drop it or worse. and i lock my most personal memorabilia in a padlock box and keep the key on me at all times. no one wears my clothes, at all, ever. facial soaps, makeup etc i don't tend to share either.

course i don't really have a problem with giving things away.. if you want it, ask me, if i have extra or don't need it anymore it's all yours. certain things though.


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## JenN2791

My mom has a terrible habit of looking through my things while I'm gone or asleep, trying to look for money for herself, and accusing me of doing drugs which she then uses as an excuse to look through my things. This sends me through the roof. I have nothing to hide, and obviously she's seen that but the more she can't find something bad, the more "suspicious" she gets of me. Which is beyond retarded. In the end, the point is... she looks for money....


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## Ih8Hondas

I'm ok with most things but be careful around my vehicles. And don't leave my cd's/dvd's laying around out of their cases. That really sets me off.


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## Karuni

I'm really territorial. I hate leaving my stuff anywhere without me being near it if it's not in my room or something. I hate people just being near my stuff, touching it is a big no-no. I never mess with or even touch other people's stuff so I expect the same in return. I grew up as an only child, so I never got much experience with sharing with people either. 

At my college residence hall, the entire building shares one kitchen. Some people keep stuff like dish soap, lemonade mix, and pots and pans in there. I absolutely do not understand keeping your own stuff in a community kitchen. Even to the bathroom (that I share with 11 other girls), I take my toothbrush and paste with me in there and out of there. Other girls leave their stuff in there. I won't.


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## a degree of freedom

Sometimes I can be kind of uncomfortable with it. Once I'd gotten home from school to find nearly my entire room all packed up in boxes because I was moving out and my family was "helping" me. It really didn't sit all that well with me that they didn't just wait for me to take care of my own stuff. I kind of like my space to be respected, and I don't mind people doing whatever they want with my stuff as long I still feel that way ... but tending to ask first when possible, tending to take care of stuff, and us being friends generally helps!! You know? I don't want to be just taken for granted. Because I'm not. Friendship is a privilege I feel

... though I admit to being needlessly stingy about it, and I wonder if that is all just antisocial of me. Unsure.



talkswithkeyboard said:


> In high school, I lost a pencil probably every week because of some random person asking for one and then running off with it after the class was over.


I probably gained a pencil as often from taking ones people had misplaced or forgotten after leaving. Swipe! I have ... so many pens and pencils ... and earbud covers from when Apple made them that way ^^; (I know that's gross ...)


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## MB1992

I take pride in my car (Very much) I always make sure she is clean, runs like a dream and looks like one. I never take my car to a normal car wash. I only go to special touchless jet washes (They use filtered water and top of the line cleaning agents) Also every three months i wax and polish my car by hand. People can see their reflections perfectly in my car. I have her serviced at the manufacturer's service and she gets the best oil, filters, etc... Also don't think of me as some weirdo, attached to his car, not having any friends. I have friends. I study economics and had a girlfriend till recently (Argument about where to live...) I enjoy sports, swimming, drinking beer (being a normal guy)

The reason i made this account and go on with this story is to figure out "Am i normal?".

Cause i absolutely hate it, when people lean on my car, touch the paint, tap on her, or anything like that. I also hate it when people mess with the settings inside my car. For example move the air vents, or mess with the radio, A/C, the navigation. That kind of things drive me to the breaking point. I always tell people, that if they want the temp. colder or warmer, to say so. Or to change the station. I would gladly fulfull their requests.

Here is an example. I was wating for some friends to show up. We were going to make a weekend-trip thing (And since I am the only one with a car, we use my car) when they came. The guy casually leaned on the car and the two girls threw their sunglasses on the dashboard! I told them not to do that. So we set off. 5 minutes in to the journey, the guy switched the radio station, opened his window, moved the airvent and started tapping on the wood details (Drumming with some song). Even swiping your finger on wooden trim can damage it. Dust particles are actually quite sharp... So I was close to beating him up and turning the car back! I didn't. But i yelled at the guy like crazy. And the girls weren't off the hook either! You can't put your sunglasses on wooden trim! You can not lean with jeans (That have metal buttons) on a freshly washed & polished car! And no way in hell, can you slam the door!

Also noone except me and my dad has driven my car (And probably never will).

So am I normal, or am I OCD about my car (aka: James May #2)


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## CW1985

Yeah, I get especially protective of discs (DVD's or games). My family say it's OCD, but honestly, I just find most people don't handle them properly and end up getting dirty fingerprints on them. If the disc is dirty or scratched it might not work properly, so is it really that silly to be protective of them?


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## cozynights

I absolutely HATE it! I hate sharing anything, specially food, to be honest. And when it's not food, I'm always afraid people are gonna break my things or make them dirty.


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## tennislover84

Yes. It's OCD with me.

I remember when it first manifested itself, when I was still a kid. It was small things at first... handling comics really carefully so that I wouldn't get any creases on the paper. Things like that.

It really started to mess my life up when I wouldn't let my friends play with my toys anymore. I had this friend that I would share action figures with, and suddenly I became afraid to move the arms and legs, because I didn't want to wear the joints out. So I just kept these little figures like statues, afraid to move them. It wasn't fun being an 11 year old developing full blown OCD, when you just want to play with your stuff.

I've gotten a lot better as an adult. It's moved onto things like worrying about people leaving greasy fingerprints on DVDs, magazines and books. When somebody asks if they can have a look at something important to me, gesturing with their hands to hold it, I just want to keep it back from them. But I try to force myself to hand it over. Being paralysed by OCD is no fun. You've got to try and work on it, or it takes over more areas of your life.


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## Leathercabbage

Yes but mostly because I'm a germ freak. My only friend never washes her hands after using the bathroom then will come and ask me if she can show me something on my ipad. I hate hate hate it. I always deter and will look it up myself and she never asks about it.


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## Danz

Just my phone and computer. Don't get me wrong though... I don't have anything inappropriate but I still don't like their hands on them.


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## IcySoul

Yes. Partly because I don't trust people anymore, but mostly because I'm a germaphobe and I hate people putting their gross hands on my stuff. >.<


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## Galanus

Yeah, I really dislike it. Usually if I have my tablet or something and I'm just browsing in between classes, a friend would come up and ask to try. I'm nice to just about everyone I meet, so I can't say no. If anything, I don't think I don't like it when they touch my stuff, I just think I'm very overprotective of my stuff. If my friend touches my laptop screen for example, I flip out.


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## TheTraveler

No one is allowed in my room. that should answer it.


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## komorikun

I don't mind much at all. I'm a little territorial about space though; my area of the fridge, my area of the bathroom cabinet. Some people tend to take over communal areas cause they have so much stuff. I had one roommate who was already using 2 shelves of the bathroom cabinet. So I only had one shelf and the other roommate had none. She started encroaching on my shelf with her stupid deodorant, so I would move it to somewhere else. 

I also have this blue plastic shelf thing for various bathroom crap that I used in the last couple apartments since there was no counter space. The roommates would always try to put their crap on the top shelf. I told them they could put crap in the bottom 2 shelves and not the top because that is where I set up my contact lenses when I put them in. One kept leaving her grubby glasses on them (guess cause she was in a hurry), so I'd put the glasses in the hallway closet. Then she'd complain about not being able to find her glasses.

I feel sorry for people when they use my laptop or mouse cause they are a bit grimy (okay the mouse is more than a little grimy). I need to buy alcohol wipes or something. 

I don't really like sharing snacks with others. You know if like someone has a big pack of stuff but there are a lot of people in the group, so you can't really eat a proper amount. I just generally decline their offers.


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## Digital Dictator

I do.


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## Somewhere I Belong

Yeah, I don't usually like people touching my things but it does depend on which person it is and which item. Some people I trust more than others. I really hate lending out things because I've seen how people handle their own personal items which is usually messy and not careful. I'm a bit of a perfectionist so I like things to be a certain way. I know they will end up being ruined if I let other people borrow my things. Either that or I will never get them back. I lend items to people and have had them returned partially or completely broken.


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## TobeyJuarez

i absolutely hate it with a passion when people touch my stuff


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## mistylake

Unless it's my mobile or my computer, I don't really care :b Today my cousin posted a picture of herself at a party wearing a shirt I left at her house a few days ago (she never asked me if she could wear it) and it didn't upset me although my first reaction was to think 'goddamn it, you've got some nerve ' :b


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## enfield

i'm okay with people touching my things. i would always touch other people's things without asking (because i was afraid to ask). then with my friends who i was comfortable around, i would just mess with their stuff without thinking (since my habit was to grab other people's things, not ask them if i could first). some friends were more okay with this, some friends were less okay. i got lectured to about respecting people's things a lot by one friend in particular when i got too carried away. but it was only a mild annoyance to him. i guess i still do this. because even like last week i grabbed a pencil off someone's desk to write my name on my homework quickly. and before they noticed it was back in place. no harm done, right? i'm always cautious about this but it has never gone badly. the only times i've caused any known harm was when i kept people's thing for awhile, like if i needed it to write a few sentences. a few time i got odd looks for doing that and felt bad. when i did ask for something to write with from someone, which was when like i would need it for the whole class period, a lot of times it would end up in my mouth. i would try to keep it away, but once i started chewing on it i would just give up. i chewed on all my pens and pencils, so it happened naturally. when they saw this the classmate would typically tell me i could just keep it. then i would promise replace it. but i wouldn't replace it. that's how i ended up with a lot of my pens. i also ended up with them by the classmate forgetting to collect it from me and me forgetting to return it. oh and the other thing i asked for a lot was paper.

so i touch other peoples things, and if other people touch mine, ask for my stuff, are grabby towards me, then i would actually take that as a nice sign - that they noticed me and my stuff. i like to share.


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## gonei

*Comp stalled but I screen shot my post in time... *










My stupid computer stalled but I managed to get a cheeky screen shot of my mammoth post before it went off.

I can't bring myself to type it out again I'm sory I've set off anxiety already but please look at the image and answer x


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## gonei

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## TLAP

*!!!!!!*

I am constantly going into my room and finding out things have been moved or taken, a big thing thats taken a lot from me is my money. I live with my aunt who has no respect for other peoples stuff and she is constantly taking whatever she wants out of my room. I have caught her taking the money and when you call her on it and ask her what she was doing she says she found the money on the floor or somewhere else and she was picking it up. Thats a load of s!#t. I am probably the most organized person that I know, I keep everything where it belongs (Unless its moved by my aunt). I keep all my PS3 games in the right cases i keep all my clothes i the right drawers folded the right way its ridiculous.


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## crystaltears

yeah, like my older sister taking my black leggings and thinking it's hers without even asking if it's anyone's? What pissed me off was that I hand-washed them the other day and hung them up in the laundry room and she wore them today, I can recognize it's mine because of the length. Plus everyone in the family thinks she's fat anyway... stretching out my damn leggings I don't even want them back -_-


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## KforB

Oddly enough, I've been on both sides here. My SA is very up and down. 95% of the time I have SA, and there is the occasional day where I'm not anxious. 95% of the days, I'm exactly like you. I don't like people touching/borrowing my stuff. Drives me nuts. However, when I have that occasional day (once every 6 months - 1 year) where I'm not anxious, I don't mind it either. This might sound a bit confusing that's the best I can describe it right now. Hope this helps


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## LoneWolf14

I agree, I freak out when people try to use my stuff or go through my stuff when I'm not around. Extremely long passwords on computer/phone, lock anything that can be. Set things certain ways so I know if someone was rummaging around. I don't trust anyone.


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## SouthWest

If someone has been using my stuff without my go ahead then I can get annoyed. I have no problem if I'm there to supervise or they have my permission because otherwise it feels like an invasion of my privacy.

The main offenders are my laptop, art supplies, cameras and my photographs.


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## butterflies27

I can't stand it.


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## anonymous5592

I have the same problem, my grandmother is the nicest person that I know, and does anything and everything to help everyone around her. She has done so many things for me and even bought me a house for college, and gave me her car. Every couple weeks she comes to my house, and starts cleaning, even though I don't want her to, and the house had already been cleansed prior to her short-notice arrival. She goes through my room, that I had just organized, and know where everything, is takes the spread off my bed, and washes it, all out of her caring nature. When she is here I have no privacy, and feel completely guilty for what she is doing. It's especially difficult because she has just gone through stage 4 cancer. I'm tearing in half because of this, she won't let my stuff alone, and I lose all sense of fulfillment for taking care of my property, and can't enjoy time with her, or relax on the weekend.


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## Cascades

Dont like it. Especially people on my phone or computer. Who knows what they'd find...embarrassing google searches, innapopriate pictures, things Ive saved etc.

Also, if people were able to read privare msgs on fb, sas..whatever else Im signed up to. Im kinda ok with my bf seeing them but once he read my old fb msgs while I was at work when I was single and lonely and there was some pretty embarrassing and explicit things on there.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Abhorsen

I used to go into a flat out rage mode when someone touched or borrowed my stuff without asking. That had mainly to do with my mother not respecting my privacy as a child and a teen. She would go through EVERYTHING and made it look like it's not a big deal. She thought she had every right to do it. 

I don't mind my friends using things as long as they ask. But I don't borrow stuff anymore. I did in the past and books weren't returned, items were "just lost" and clothes were returned dirty and smelly (wtf). You also cannot go through my sketchbooks if I don't allow it, that's just a no-no. 
At work/in college: if it's on my desk it's mine. I'm very territorial too and I can't stand touchy people who take the liberty to move things around on my desk. It especially pisses me off when people know what they're doing and still continue to do it.


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## the misanthrope

I do not even like my long time girl friend touch my things, not so much out of fear of breakage, or contamination, but because I hate for any thing to be out of place.


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## kinsit

I hate when people touch my belongings, even my family members. I get really upset when my mom comes into my room and looks through my backpack or in my closet. A few days ago she saw one of my folders(i have things carved on my folder, like song lyrics and doodles) and she said that i had to throw it out because "only sick people do that." I also have a younger sister and i get really upset when other kids take her toys, especially if they never give it back ): I just don't understand why parents don't teach their kids that they shouldn't take things that don't belong to them. I'm way older than my younger sister so i grew up by myself, so maybe that's why i hate sharing or why i'm so territorial. 
:smile2:


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## One Armed Scissor

I feel the same way, especially about food or drink. I worked at a place where the son of the boss would walk by my manager's table and take food off of his plate (he would grab a couple of french fries, stuff like that.) My manager put up with it but it revolted me. When the boss' son tried that with me I attacked him and threw him on a table. Amazingly I didn't get fired for that.


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## chaosherz

I think the fact that so many people can identify with this is evidence of how this is related to SA. I think you can put it down to three reasons - self-consciousness, a need for privacy and just perfectionism. We are fearful of people judging us about our stuff, don't want others to find things out about us (even innocuous things like our interests) and have everything in its place and freak out if someone changes that.

I have it too and I absolutely hate anyone going into my childhood bedroom and looking through my stuff. Even though I don't live there anymore and it would usually only be my parents or nosey sister. My stuff and my room is my sanctuary and I don't want anyone in there let alone looking through my stuff. I have a lot of sensitive things in there I want to keep secret and hidden away under piles of stuff, in drawers or boxes... (and no, none of it porn-related... what is this 1999?) lol.


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## AllTheSame

It kind of bothers me, yeah. I don't "lend" people money....if I give you any I just consider it a gift. It's just easier that way, and a lot of people will conveniently "forget" to pay you back. 

The same goes for anyone who borrows anything from me, pretty much.

And I cannot stand it when someone just sort of helps themselves to the food on my plate. *** that. I worked for a woman that used to do that....she'd come by at lunch and just pick food off of people's plates and omg everyone hated it and thought it was pretty rude. If you take something of my plate, if you put your hands on my food it's all yours, i'm ****** done. The exception would be a gf lol, she can do whatever, we're already swapping body fluids so it doesn't bother me at all. 

~sent from my GalaxyS4


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## WillYouStopDave

Pretty much but I guess it depends a lot on who it is and what it is. I don't have any money so I am obviously a lot more respectful of the stuff I do have than a lot of people are. Especially things I can't easily replace. Generally, if it costs more than about 5 bucks and it isn't food, I can't replace it without bumming my parents. Which usually doesn't go over too well considering they probably paid for the first one.

My mother was always a tightwad when I was growing up so even the poorest kids usually had stuff I didn't dare ask for. I've got a long history of having the same stuff for years and keeping even stuff I didn't like because getting it was such an ordeal.


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## sandromeda

Totally. I'm a super giving person, but people taking stuff without asking, especially if it's something expensive will always make me rage


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## twitchy666

*they don't*

what I hate is people consistently using the word 'you'

phone
movie script
interview
newsreader
marketers

You! You! Your... face! lifestyle?

I want language away from humans, people..xx the Earth's orbit, sea, weather, car.. swimming pool, oven, electronics... laws...not themselves, their family.. uurrgghhh! I get violent when people start; Me, us, we think.. You are...

Narcissist word is You. Might as well be a knife, gun, torpedo aimed at You or your friends. I'd say: wow: nice weapon! sadly so useless kit, until it involves people! Prefer if a tank blows up a tank or buildings, car, train without people in it. Server attacks server, rendering its disk(s) damaged.

old traditional 'guns don't kill people?' People do.

I understand however language is used carelessly, ... it the . and the... so.. and .. the kind of things needs a focus... often people. Moaning... it's The weather.. it is horrible. Me: humidity best 1400-1600. let's go now! if raining or dark or cold.. less moisture is much nicer!


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## Riff Raff

*I do hate it when people touch my stuff without asking. *

but if people ask me to borrow something then usually I am ok with lending certain things to them.

BUT > like one time I had this roommate.. and the guy would take my stuff without asking and usually wind up breaking my stuff. Like I come home oneday and the guy just took my boom box raidio without asking. He just took it and brought it to the beach and he broke the antenna off the thing. I do not like it when people take my stuff without asking. Also this same guy broke my VCR. I went out and bought a used VCR and one day I came home and the thing would not load movies... well I brought it to the place where I bought it because it had like a 90 day warranty and the guy told me that somebody had punched the top of it and bent all the insides... and i know that it was my roommate who did that. The one time I let that same roommate borrow my truck > because he said he needed to get to his job for something important... well I heard a story from somebody else that they saw that the guy took my truck up into the woods for a joyride and was beating on it. And when he returned my truck to me.. there were noises underneath that were not there before.

So **** like this really pisses me off when people take my stuff without asking and also when they abuse my stuff or break my stuff and so forth. 
So now after situations like that in life... I do not let just anybody borrow my things

Some people have no respect for other peoples property


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