# Am I a ghost? The world is fading away.



## EverFlowingSpring (Sep 3, 2010)

I feel like I am drowning and coming up for gasps. My glimpses of the world are vague and sometimes frantic, and the rest of the time I'm buried in a deep place.

I really don't want any help even. I can't believe it's so hard to make a friend, and everyone I talk to just drops contact shortly after we've met.

My isolation from the world is beginning to make me feel like I'm losing touch. I walk through the world like a ghost, in some world I'm not meant to be. There's nothing wrong with me physically, and I don't think mentally, but I can't help feeling as I walk down the street like I'm intruding in the world of others, where everyone is living their little lives and I'm just star crossed. Sometimes my mind warbles at any contact.

I don't really even feel the need to say these things about how I feel, or maybe that's not true... I only feel the need when my attempts at coherency and realism seem futile.

I'm happy this forum exists, but I find in it just another abstract set of internet symbols and for all it could matter automated responses. I've been my whole life without a friend and now everything is just empty and at the best of times I am filled with the feeling of a hysterical laughter that doesn't exist enough to actually be let out.

When I write I find it almost impossible to keep focus on a character and a connection to nature or environment doesn't come naturally.

Is there any real people out there, or am I actually a ghost catching only fading glimpses of a once real world?


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## SADSpirit81 (Sep 8, 2010)

I don't know what to say except that my experience is very much the same... I always feel like I'm looking at the world from a distance and I don't know what to do to make meaningful connections. My attempts at communcation aren't heard most of the time. Or maybe I just don't know how. When I do make contacts they're usually fleeting. Anyway, great post and good description of what it's like to live with social anxiety.

~SADspirit.


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## kid a (Aug 26, 2010)

i know how you feel  im sorry.


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## VagueResemblance (Apr 17, 2010)

What the hell, I could've sworn there was a thread here. This forum feels kinda haunted lately. It's creeping me out.


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## VagueResemblance (Apr 17, 2010)

Aanyway. That was well described...I have a bit of the same thing, same incredible feeling of separation. Feels like there's a glass wall ten miles thick between me and everyone else, sometimes, ripples in the glass making it so I can barely see them anymore.

My first thought was to suggest going out, mingling with some crowd in a city center or shopping mall, but I remembered doing the same thing and only feeling more alienated... pure faith is the only thing that's helped me. There are other people out there. It's possible to make contact, to actually really communicate on a deep level. That I haven't done it yet only means I haven't done it ..yet.

I hope you can find a belief like that, too. It's helpful, the only light at the end of the tunnel sometimes.


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## CabecitaSilenciosa (Jun 8, 2010)

I agree, great description. I'm afraid I have nothing to tell you, though, except that I feel the same way, and I've actually posted about this on here before. I really feel disconnected from this world. I don't even feel connected to anyone here, people who experience the same things I feel. I'm a ghost, too.


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## gokuu (Sep 26, 2010)

My isolation from the world is beginning to make me feel like I'm losing touch. I walk through the world like a ghost, in some world I'm not meant to be. There's nothing wrong with me physically, and I don't think mentally, but I can't help feeling as I walk down the street like I'm intruding in the world of others, where everyone is living their little lives and I'm just star crossed. Sometimes my mind warbles at any contact.


wow i feel the same way when im outside. man i never new there was other ppl who feel like i feel. u seem to be smart so youll be ok. i good at cod mw2. think about what your good at b/c that helps me feel better maybe it can help u to. good luck keep on keeping on


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## sellme (Oct 21, 2010)

Nice poem


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## Antechinus (May 17, 2010)

I often feel very detached from people in the 'real world'. I rarely go out there, spend most of my time with my husband indoors. I am grateful I have him here with me 24 hours a day, because I'd die of loneliness otherwise. It's the only communication I have though, and everyone out in the world seems like zombies to me. It's like they look right through me, like I'm invisible.


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## stranger25 (Apr 29, 2010)

I already missed the train.


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## chriswatch (Oct 6, 2010)

You feel like a ghost because your soul is empty. The more you don't have positive personal relationships with people, the more your soul's life dies out. My soul is empty as well. What's scary is I've become used to it.


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## woot (Aug 7, 2009)

Don't give up man, just put yourself out there more. Feel the fear and do it anyway


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## nork123 (Oct 22, 2009)

I know the feeling, I feel like I have no real connection with people, even people that I would call my friends most of the time. When I have occasionally attempted going to a party or something a lot of the time while everyone else is having fun around me im left standing there sinking into myself and don't really feel like im properly in the room. Usually when I walk through public I stick my headphones on and go into my own world


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

I also feel like a ghost. It feels like nobody notices me...and if they do, they don't care about me.


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## Still Waters (Sep 18, 2008)

Oh yes,people often don't hear me when I talk,don't laugh at my jokes,look past me etc. Sort of reminds me of the Velveteen Bunny story-you only become real when you are loved.


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## maclasch (Jan 9, 2009)

Hi EverFlowingSpring. How did I know you were a writer before you even mentioned it? Because even your forum posts sound like poetry.
I definitely know how you feel about staying connected to a character or environment, but I keep trying, because writing is my only connection to... well what I hope to have in my real life.
What I'm trying to say is, hang in there, and I hope you keep writing. It seems you have a lot to share with the world.


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