# Does having siblings help?



## inerameia (Jan 26, 2012)

Or does it make your anxiety worse? I'm an only child. I wish I had an older sibling. Someone to guide me. I only live with my grandma. We're very different people, although she loves me which I'm grateful for.


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## lollipop999 (Feb 28, 2013)

omofca said:


> Or does it make your anxiety worse? I'm an only child. I wish I had an older sibling. Someone to guide me. I only live with my grandma. We're very different people, although she loves me which I'm grateful for. Anyway I was curious about siblings.


Younger siblings no. Older siblings I'm not sure. Then again it depends on what type of relationship you have with your siblings. Some siblings are really close like friends and do stuff together while others barely talk to each other.


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## Crisigv (Aug 3, 2013)

My older sister is also an introvert, so she never guided me. My little brother is the outgoing one and is never home. Oh the life of a middle child.


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

I could have done without a younger sister. If anything, being the oldest made things worse.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

No. I have have 4 brothers. I can't seem to join in with them. When we play games I'm always quiet while they all just yell and i never really feel any excitement.


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## BuriedAlive (Aug 26, 2013)

I am the middle child and for me my answer is a no.
my younger brother is the only sibling I really have a connection with.
everyone else makes everything wrose


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## alienbird (Apr 9, 2010)

I have an older brother and a younger brother. They often make my anxiety worse, as they like to tease/purposely embarrass me... but they have made it better by having someone to go places with sometimes and to do stuff for me. I always wished for a sister.

Having siblings could help or make things worse, depending on your relationship with them.


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## twitchy666 (Apr 21, 2013)

*Gaps*

 30 year gap between my two brothers of the same age
makes a difference

My one remaining brother has kept me away from his family. I think his reason was both the age gap and the way I behaved. I think that's fair. Similar from my late brother's widow. He's been good enough to help out by visiting me in hospital, including flying to Italy and retrieving me from the hospital, when my return ticket had expired. He sees me as the loser of the family. Some deem one's actions are the only factors in life to change course. I don't like to blame my health. It's a limp excuse. I never wanted to declare myself as disabled. I can run fast and push / pull big weights, and look after myself and I'm a talented driver. Most judgement to measure a disabled status are about hearing, vision, old age, ability to move (ie. wheelchair), washing, feeding, getting in / out of bed... eg. overweight or breathing, organ troubles. Strange to encourage someone to beg for a disability status. Perhaps empathy

I wonder if siblings are an issue, from oldest to the youngest. I was brought up alone. I see it as a lack of social standing but altogether being one of many can be a real advantage or nasty? Overall, I haven't felt motivated to make family. I expected to make good money and then consider family. All friends of the same age have decided to make family or not


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## enjo (Sep 20, 2011)

I got 4 bros. I'm the youngest and the only girl. They never guide me.. Hell what do they know bout girly stuff. 
so that's given. No complaints. Glad I don't need to share clothes and shoes though. Lol


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## KelsKels (Oct 4, 2011)

Im kind of an only child.. I grew up alone anyways. Ive always wondered if having siblings made a difference.. but I guess it wouldn't.


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## h00dz (Dec 25, 2012)

I'm the youngest of 3.. even though one of my 2 sisters is really nice and supportive, it wouldn't of changed me getting SA or how to deal with it. They don't understand.


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## yelda (Jun 12, 2010)

I am an only child.
in my opinion, being an only child is the best.
I dont need to work for Money.
my parents are not rich but all what they have is what I have! 
since I have not needed to work, I have worked on playing musical instruments and singing. after more than a 33 years of musical self-studying I almost become the best of the turkish traditional music's history! 
I am extremely lucky to be an only child!


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## newusernamethatdoesntexi (Jun 15, 2013)

This is a very interesting question. In my case, I think it has helped that I have like a bazillion sisters. Although we are so NOT the type of family to discuss our problems, everyone seems to have some kind of anxiety issue, mostly dealing with other people. So that's comforting. But, when we get together, we can be so loud and funny, that I feel like this is how normal people are when around friends and such. I think when I do finally get over my SA, I'll need to be that person I am when around my family. At least I know I'm capable?


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## Nekomata (Feb 3, 2012)

I generally hate my younger sister and wish she was dead. So yeah, having a sibling doesn't really help :3
She goes to uni, is an extrovert, is generally insulting and gets everything she wants.
So yeah, makes anxiety a teeeeny tiny bit worse :>


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## firestar (Jun 27, 2009)

yukikodunkzone said:


> This is a very interesting question. In my case, I think it has helped that I have like a bazillion sisters. Although we are so NOT the type of family to discuss our problems, everyone seems to have some kind of anxiety issue, mostly dealing with other people. So that's comforting. But, *when we get together, we can be so loud and funny, that I feel like this is how normal people are when around friends and such.* I think when I do finally get over my SA, I'll need to be that person I am when around my family. At least I know I'm capable?


I'm the same way around my siblings. I can talk to them for hours on end about all sorts of things and just generally relax in a way that I usually can't unless I'm completely alone.

I don't think it helps the anxiety, but it does bolster my self-esteem. I feel so much better after talking with them, even though we don't talk all that frequently.

I do sometimes wish I had an older sibling to look up to. I have an older brother but he hasn't been a role model at all. It isn't easy being the one who has to do everything in life first.


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## Ntln (Apr 27, 2012)

It can and it can also make it worse. I have an older sister, who helped raise me as much as my parents did, plus being closer to my age and less biased meant that she could help me with my problems a bit more than they did. However, just like my parents, her overprotective attitude towards me helped towards the development of my anxiety. She's also very outgoing and always forces me to go to events that I have no interest in, thinking it would help my shyness and make me more social. In truth, it makes it worse, since I never want to go there and I feel like a dog on a leash whenever I go anywhere with her and it really hurts my self-esteem. And she trusts me just as little as my parents. This one time, a person came up to me when I was with my sister asking me for directions to the museum. I started explaining, but before I could say much, my sister just jumped in started explaining it herself, even though my English is much better than hers and I know the area a lot better than she does. It was extremely awkward for me. She also doesn't understand why I'm so introverted and is always trying to change me.


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## HopefulDreamer (Feb 26, 2012)

Nope. I think my older sister actually helped me develop social anxiety.


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## Greenleaf62 (Aug 1, 2013)

I have a younger brother and sister. I'm not sure if I could say that having siblings has helped though. I mean, we get along and hang out occasionally but they've never really done anything to make my SA better (or worse). Their only advice to me is just to "get out there more."


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## getsomeair (Feb 1, 2013)

Help with what?

My siblings aren't mean or unpleasant per sé... But they have their own lives. I fall into the family-category. Which means, I'm worth seeing a few times a year. Then they're off living their own lives. And I'm struggling as always, feeling a general lack of drive and motivation to break this circle I'm in. 

I have been in a kind of resentful mood towards them lately. 

I know it's not their responsibility to help me in any way. Obviously I have to help myself. But I kind of wish they *Wanted* to...


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## Jayne311 (Aug 20, 2009)

Having a younger sister in my experience does not help with anxiety. I wish in addition I had an older sister who I was close to and who would help me with things, because I really have no idea what to do with life in general. I mean, I don't ever put together the idea of going out or doing anything. I would probably never have left my room if my parents hadn't practically signed me up for college themselves. It's not laziness--I really just don't know how to act. I think having an older sister who was good at having to do everything first would have been tremendously helpful in me learning how to act and maybe even making decisions for myself.


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## jasiony (Aug 15, 2010)

I have a brother who's around 2.5 years older than me, a younger brother who's about a year younger than me and two little sisters who are 12 and 10. I'll tell you during high school it definitely made me more anxious because I was a freshman when my older bro was a senior and I was even weirder because everyone compared me to my older brother who was outgoing and popular.

My younger brother was even worse cause he too was popular, one of the most popular in school, and I was his older brother who was quiet, reserved, and strange. Everybody just called me his brother, never my name. They always asked me why I was so different and shy, some even asked how it feels to have your younger brother be cooler than you. He also went along with what other people would say about me from time to time and actually tell me what everyone thought of me when we got into arguments (he knew that would pretty much settle it)

So sorry for the long response, but it most certainly made my anxiety worse during high school, now it doesn't really have an effect since I live on my own and don't talk to him much if at all.


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## Hyperborea (Aug 28, 2011)

Depends on the sibling.


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## lordseshomaru86 (Aug 13, 2013)

I didn't know my siblings growing up, didn't live with them, so I can't imagine them being any big help at all. They have their own lives, and probably wouldn't be able to relate to a piece of crap like me


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## AxeDroid (Jan 11, 2013)

I have siblings, 8 in total. 5 brothers and 3 sisters but I am the oldest of all of them and I don't see them helping much. Meh, I guess it would be my answer. :/


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## Odinn (Dec 15, 2012)

I only have older siblings but they don't guide me or help my anxiety.
They do help for depression/loneliness but that's it.


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## TheClown7 (Oct 15, 2013)

No if they live far away from you and you are the younger one.


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## Kalliber (Aug 18, 2012)

O yes a lot


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## low (Sep 27, 2009)

No. Both my siblings are self centred and oppressive.


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## zstandig (Sep 21, 2013)

I don't think so, well if I didn't have my brother I suppose I'd be lonelier...

But in the big picture his presence in my life hasn't improved or impaired my social anxiety. Granted we're seven years apart and very different, we're polar opposites for the most part. Most things I'm good at he sucks at and vice versa. Some times I wish we could do that fusion dance from dragonball z, then we'd be "normal" lol...

but seriously I don't interact with him much, because I don't know how, or what to say.


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## Puppet Master (Jan 1, 2012)

No effect though emotionally I'd be better off if I didn't have to deal with a self entitled car obsessed gamer clown.


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## MJohn (Oct 26, 2013)

Me and my younger sibling are kinda distant, though we're in good terms. My sibling has her life, I have mine, still living with SA. So I guess it depends on the sibling.


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## shypoet90 (Oct 14, 2013)

I have three brothers. The oldest is deceased, the second oldest is 16yrs older than me, and the youngest is 6yrs younger than me. My two living brothers are my best friends, and they help me so much. I am very close with the youngest one, who is energetic and fun-loving and always encouraging me to go forward in life and aspire to great things. This helps me a lot with social anxiety. When we are together, he helps talks me out of focusing on what people think, and his maturity is astounding to me. My big brother is just as jocular and motivational, but I'm not around him as much. Having siblings opens up so many opportunities to vent and get stronger through this painful illness.


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## Carcamo (May 4, 2013)

Wouldn't say help, but there's times were me and my brother talk. But he's also bipolar, He's cool for a bit. Then later on is different. Just like me lol. None of us really got along that well. But there's days where we are cool ya know.


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## MileHigh (Oct 31, 2013)

My older brother and sister are much more confident than me they tell me I need to find some confidence because they do not understand social anxiety they mostly just make me feel stupid, but not intentionally. We used to be very close but after my father passed away we do not talk very much and we all live in different towns, I know they are just living their lives but a text or call once in a while would be nice.


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## sugamuffs (Sep 13, 2013)

For me it does help a lot because I am very close with my siblings, especially with my sister who is less than 2 years older than me (I also have 3 brothers). I fail at maintaining friendships with anyone else, so its nice to have them to hang out with. My siblings are some of the only people that I feel completely comfortable around. Also, many times they expose me to social situations that help me to face my anxieties.


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## Monster123 (Aug 15, 2013)

I have two younger sisters and now I honestly think they helped me so much when I was growing up. That and having to share a room with both of them throughout childhood and some of adulthood so we had no choice but to interact with each other. I still used to hide in our room a lot so who knows what would have happened if I'd have had a room to myself when I was younger. Being an only child and/or having your own room can surely only lead to further isolation if you are already suffering from something like SA?


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

No and yes. I have four brothers. I can never have a good conversation with them. But if we go out i usually get less anxious or try to hide my SAD because i feel embarrass for them to see.


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## Fisk (Aug 19, 2011)

I'd probably go nuts if I didn't have my brother. We're twins, and his anxiety is just as bad as mine, so we can always relate.


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## Cedolin (Nov 1, 2013)

No, we are complete opposites. He is social and outgoing, I can't really connect with him.


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## Chappy02 (Sep 27, 2012)

I have a sister that is 8.5 years older than me. I have an older brother who is 5 years older than me and a younger brother who is 5 years younger than me. For the most part I get along with my siblings. My sister sometimes lectures me and tells me what I should do. I find it annoying when she does that. I love hanging out with my brothers. I have so much fun with them. With my brothers I have the freedom to be myself.


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