# Using coupons on a date?



## letitrock (Jan 10, 2009)

What do you think of using coupons on a date, especially on a first date?

Would you use them on a first date?

Here's the thing, if I went on a date with someone and they used a coupon, like a "2 meals for the price of one" type of deal, I'd find that understandable, cuz that would save a lot of money, and I'm all for saving money.

But I might also be offended...I don't know

Because there are some girls who a guy would _never _think to use a coupon with,-because either she's too beautiful or because her standards are too high, or because she's *****y or whatver......so in that context, I _would_ feel offended if a guy used a coupon on a date with me since he's using a coupon with me because he doesn't think I'm worth paying full price

But if the guy seriously didn't discriminate who he spent coupons on, *if I knew for fact *that he used coupons on dates *no matter who he was on a date with*, then I wouldn't feel offended at all, I'd feel okay about that, cuz that'd mean he thought I was just as special or whatver as other girls

And if we were in a relationship, then I'd be even more okay with using coupons, cuz like I said, I'm all for saving money, and it'd be cool that we're on the same page

But I have to say, if I was on a date with a guy and I saw him pull out a coupon, my initial reaction, no matter how much I like saving money would be to think, "wow, he's using a coupon, does this mean he doesn't think I'm worth paying full price, what does this mean???????", and I would probably end up obsessing about the implications of it..

So guys and girls, what do you think of using coupons on a date, on a first date? Guys, what you dare do something like that? Girls, would you be okay with it, would you be disappointed?


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## quiet0lady (Sep 29, 2009)

I would be so turned on... and pleasantly surprised he's as cheap as me.


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## caflme (Jun 7, 2009)

LOL - _I_ would probably _have_ the coupon and offer it to him before the date... but no, I would not be offended - I would actually be impressed that he was frugal and financially conservative and budget conscious. I would also be impressed that he felt comfortable enough or confident enough to use one with me - some guys would be too concerned with appearances.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

I would make that a topic of discussion for the first date.
I don't know if the first date would be ideal. Second date onward, yes, and that would be if she thinks it is okay - again, a topic of conversation.

I am glad to see positive response from the ladeeez on this, though.


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## letitrock (Jan 10, 2009)

caflme said:


> lol - _i_ would probably _have_ the coupon and offer it to him before the date...


haha_, nice_


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## Cleary (Nov 10, 2007)

quiet0lady said:


> I would be so turned on... and pleasantly surprised he's as cheap as me.


lol I second this.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Well, with gasoline approahing $3 again this summer..... 
Any savings helps.


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## Emptyheart (Sep 15, 2009)

I wouldn't be offended, I'm up or anything that saves you money.
I have fun collecting them lol....


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## Haydsmom2007 (Oct 16, 2009)

lol no.... why would i be offended if he wanted to save some money?


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## STKinTHEmud (Jun 21, 2009)

I don't think it's wrong that he used a coupon, but I guy who does that is essentially shooting himself in the foot. Evidently, most women can't help but think about what it means, and those seeds of mistrust might eventually bloom into dislike. Really, for all that we like to think that dating can be spontaneous and specific according to people's personalities, it often feels like we're jumping through hoops according to unwritten rules.


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

I wouldn't mind in the least. Coupons freaking rock.


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

I would wonder if she was broke, cheap, or maybe both. I was watching an episode of disaster date on Mtv during one night of insomnia and one of the episodes had a guy breaking out the coupons and they were expired, lol. His date wasn't impressed.


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## Rasputin_1 (Oct 27, 2008)

letitrock said:


> So guys and girls, what do you think of using coupons on a date, on a first date? Guys, what you dare do something like that? Girls, would you be okay with it, would you be disappointed?


Why in the world do you assume the guy should be paying for both of you in the first place


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

I would pay for both of us - it's chivalrous......ladeeez like that.


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## Rasputin_1 (Oct 27, 2008)

millenniumman75 said:


> I would pay for both of us - it's chivalrous......ladeeez like that.


I may or may not depending. But I don't think i've ever been on a "date"


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

I am still hoping myself. 

That is what I would do, though, if I was going on a date. Hold off on the coupons on the first date, but at least discuss it with her. If she says it is okay, then use it. :lol 
When she gets to know me better and thinks it is okay to use coupons, then I'll use them more. She'd understand then.


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## mind_games (Nov 30, 2008)

STKinTHEmud said:


> ..Evidently, most women can't help but think about what it means..


^this



letitrock said:


> .. and it'd be cool that we're on the same page


We'd be on the same paragraph if she agreed to split costs lol.

But unless I'd already established I was really really poor I'd save the coupon for later (ie not the first date). Or if I brought up the idea for the date by bringing up that I have a coupon for a certain place then it might be passable (Like, ''Hey I this old lady's purse I stole had a coupon for that xyz restaurant. Wanna go this Thursday?").


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## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

The real question:

Should a guy be offended if a woman offers to buy dinner and brings a coupon?


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## strawberryjulius (Jun 28, 2009)

I wouldn't think anything other than: awesome, he knows how to save money!

I'd also be paying for my own ticket. My boyfriend is a sneak though and buys them before I arrive and won't take my money. >_>


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## Amocholes (Nov 5, 2003)

Tacky to use a coupon on the first few dates. However, once you get to know each other fairly well and the relationship has formed, I see nothing wrong with saying, " Hey I got this coupon in the mail. Want to go use it?"

As for dating etiquette:

If I ask you out, I expect to pay. I should not be surprised or shocked when you order the steak and lobster.
If you ask me out, I expect you to pay. I will order something nice but not extravagant.
Be prepared. If you are paying, have enough cash for the date or put it on a credit/debit card. If your Date is paying and runs a little short, offer to help out before he/she has to ask and don't hold it against them in the future. You are, after all, trying to build a relationship.

Splitting the check:

If going "dutch" (each person paying for their own) order what you want but don't show off.
If splitting the check evenly, order from the mid price range of the menu.


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

i'd be a little hurt, but i'd understand it. i'd probably razz the guy for using a coupon just to make him know i noticed, but i would try to let it go. this is all if it's on a first date. if it's dates afterward than i wouldn't give a crap, but i'd still comment on it just cause it's funny, lol.

i love coupons so don't worry- you're not the only cheap skate here 

So, if it's an early date it might make your date feel like you don't value her, because we know if a guy is interested, seriously, in a girl, he wouldn't even think of doing something like that. so it's not that i personally would be offended because i didn't get a bill paid for me (i personally like splitting the bill, or switching who pays every time i go out with someone), but it can send a message that makes her feel like you don't take her seriously, or make her feel you're not THAT interested. it's easier to get involved with someone when you feel that your feelings are mutual, and this could plant a seed that makes her feel otherwise.


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## Rasputin_1 (Oct 27, 2008)

Amocholes said:


> Tacky to use a coupon on the first few dates. However, once you get to know each other fairly well and the relationship has formed, I see nothing wrong with saying, " Hey I got this coupon in the mail. Want to go use it?"
> 
> As for dating etiquette:
> 
> ...


Smart man.... I also think it could be a casual way of asking someone out... maybe better for a gift certificate?

" Hey I have won a gift certificate to this really good Italian place downtown, we should go this Friday."

Kinda seems like it takes the pressure off.


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## Sunshine009 (Sep 21, 2008)

Amocholes said:


> Tacky to use a coupon on the first few dates. However, once you get to know each other fairly well and the relationship has formed, I see nothing wrong with saying, " Hey I got this coupon in the mail. Want to go use it?"
> 
> As for dating etiquette:
> 
> ...


Yes, everything I read before said don't do it on the first date or the 2nd, but after things are going well, there is no specific time, so after a "relationship has formed" is close to what I have read to bring it up. Some people wouldn't care at all and others would be really offended if you did it too soon but you don't know who is who. I think that if you were to talk about how you were with money, a saver or a spender type, and how they were, that would be an indictation of how the person feels about it. If they go to clearance sales, garage sales, etc for fun. If they like it or not put off by it then ask them later, if other things are going well, a month or couple of months maybe after a relationship, then I would bring it up.

Grammar is getting worse I feel, yes. :cry

I mean "My grammar is getting worse I think". lol.


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## caflme (Jun 7, 2009)

Amocholes said:


> As for dating etiquette:
> 
> If I ask you out, I expect to pay. I should not be surprised or shocked when you order the steak and lobster.
> If you ask me out, I expect you to pay. I will order something nice but not extravagant.
> ...


I agree with the above but... I also feel that whoever bring up going to dinner pays.... If I say, hey let so get at Red Lobster next Friday - I'm paying... if the guy asks then he's paying. If I know he is low on cash I will suggest going dutch... or I will offer to pay ... if he knows I am low on cash I would expect him to do the same. It is all about balance.

But in this economy I still see no problem with coupons....

(too funny - I just got a message when I tried to post that my post was too short and I had to INCREASE it by one character ?????????:um)


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## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

I must be old fashioned, on a first date I would find that a bit tacky. :stu That's just me though... :um


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## letitrock (Jan 10, 2009)

Amocholes said:


> As for dating etiquette:
> 
> If I ask you out, I expect to pay. I should not be surprised or shocked when you order the steak and lobster.
> If you ask me out, I expect you to pay. I will order something nice but not extravagant.
> Be prepared. If you are paying, have enough cash for the date or put it on a credit/debit card. If your Date is paying and runs a little short, offer to help out before he/she has to ask and don't hold it against them in the future. You are, after all, trying to build a relationship.


Yeah I agree with that, if you do the asking out you should pay.

Although, on a date, I'd feel more comfortable splitting the check, no matter who did the asking out.


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## fern (Nov 16, 2008)

I wouldn't mind, I'd just be happy that any guy even wanted to take me out to dinner. Besides, my dad is the cheapest man in the world so I've pretty much become used to that kind of thing.


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## pariahgirl (Mar 26, 2008)

I would probably use a coupon on a date if I could get away with it, coupons are just awesome; what's not cool about saving money. So no I wouldn't hold it against anyone else who does it.


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## nemesis1 (Dec 21, 2009)

I wouldnt, as i wouldnt want to give the date any more reason not to like me...


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## VanDamMan (Nov 2, 2009)

After more thought, I think it woudl be a good way to weed out the shallow people you are going out with. I might do it just as a test.


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## SilentLoner (Jan 30, 2006)

I guess I wouldn't mind, it would save from having to ask if he wanted to split the bill. Plus I always get anxious about ordering food that may cost too much when I'm with other people.


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

letitrock said:


> What do you think of using coupons on a date, especially on a first date?


I think I'd fall instantly in love if I met a girl who whipped a coupon out of her purse.

Look around you. Homes in foreclosure, families downing in the red ink of credit card debt, and the US having to kiss China's butt to get them to buy ever more Treasury debt to fund our nation's endless love of overspending.

Too many Americans look upon thrift as a sin rather than the virtue that it can be. If saving money is a sin, then the next time you buy a car demand to pay more than sticker price -- don't want the salesman to think you're some cheapskate.


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

Amocholes said:


> If I ask you out, I expect to pay. I should not be surprised or shocked when you order the steak and lobster.


Can I wash that down with a $100 bottle of wine as well?

If a date -- that you're paying for -- orders steak & lobster it would tend to look like they're trying to get all they can out of you for free. After all, how often do you find yourself going out to eat and ordering the most expensive items possible?

Dating involves many silly games and this is one of them. Others when on a date would feel compelled to order something low cost, since going for what they really want could appear like they're just out for free food.

And then there is the issue of expectations, as in I paid and I expect something in return (meaning sex). I know a woman my age and she tells me that her mother always told her to pay her portion of the bill. Her mother feels that men expect sex after spending large sums of money on a woman, which is probably true in many cases. It's a silly game that should be avoided. Nobody wants to feel pressure to "put out" and nobody wants to feel taken advantage of by a date who managed to eat the most expensive meal possible. It's time to toss old dating etiquette where it belong: in the trash bin of history.


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## Futures (Aug 27, 2005)

It's threads like this that make me almost feel relieved that I've never been on a date. I can only imagine how awkward a first date must be for both people.


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## BetaBoy90 (Jan 5, 2010)

If he uses the coupon on his own meal and still pays for his meal, than I think it's fair. Can she really complain, I mean he pays for her meal.


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## lyssado707 (Oct 29, 2004)

OMG no i wouldn't be offended. I wouldn't even expect someone who's not responsible for me to pay for me in the first place.


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## djr86 (Jul 23, 2009)

quiet0lady said:


> I would be so turned on... and pleasantly surprised he's as cheap as me.


^the above made me laugh!

But I do not think I would ever use a coupon on a first date because I would not want the person to think I am only taking them to dinner because I can get theres for free. After a while of dating, it is only natural to let down our gaurds and do things like show our "cheap side". But I don't think I would consider it at all on a first date.


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## Johnny_Genome (Nov 11, 2003)

I rarely if ever use coupons in everyday life (not that I couldn't use the savings), so I wouldn't imagine using one on a date. I think it's best to go for coffee or something affordable if you're low on cash instead of trying to impress someone by going somewhere you wouldn't normally go because you have a coupon. Setting up unrealistic expectations is not my thing.


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

Amocholes said:


> Tacky to use a coupon on the first few dates. However, once you get to know each other fairly well and the relationship has formed, I see nothing wrong with saying, " Hey I got this coupon in the mail. Want to go use it?"


This.


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

Futures said:


> It's threads like this that make me almost feel relieved that I've never been on a date. I can only imagine how awkward a first date must be for both people.


Yeah this is making me think that too. Pressuuuuuuuuuure.


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## path0gen (Jun 28, 2006)

I think if the idea is to make a good first impression, using a coupon won't go far in helping you do so. Maybe it's just me but I hide my cheapness until I'm much further along in the relationship. Then I bust out the coupons, admit that I buy jeans at Old Navy, shop exclusively at the used book stores and only order from the dollar menu at fast food joints.


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## Bon (Dec 24, 2005)

Amocholes said:


> Tacky to use a coupon on the first few dates. However, once you get to know each other fairly well and the relationship has formed, I see nothing wrong with saying, " Hey I got this coupon in the mail. Want to go use it?"
> 
> As for dating etiquette:
> 
> ...


Gosh I still Love you;-) I agree one hundred percent.

No coupon the first date, I also expect the person doing the inviting to pay, if I invite someone I pay, No coupon, if they invite me, they pay if they didn't I would be offended.


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## lonelygirl88 (Dec 25, 2009)

well i am a cheap date because i could not eat on a date, i'd be way too nervous. i don't know why everyone likes to go out to eat when meeting someone- anyways coupons would not even be necessary for me.


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## Ysonesse (Dec 25, 2009)

somethinginthewind said:


> Me too actually. I mean, I can see movie passes


As long as the passes are for the right theater. If a person on a date pulls out passes for another chain, then doesn't get the clue even after both their date and the cashier point out the obvious error...well, that date is over with, end of story.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

Where would you go that you could even use a coupon onna first date? Maybe I don't pay attention to the coupons enough.

I don't see anything wrong with it, hopefully they make a coupon for 2 dates at the price of one.


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

One question for those who would not like their date to use a coupon: would you be impressed if he told you how deeply in debt he is due to his complete lack of regard for responsible spending?:stu

I'd note there is a difference between being "cheap" and being one who demands value, that is getting the most bang for your buck. Do identical meals taste any different if one happens to have a 2 for 1 coupon?

What exactly is the complaint about coupons? How does this conversation go when a lady talks to her friends about a date (let's say Jane goes on a date with coupon-user John and then discusses it with her friend Amy):

-Jane: "You wouldn't believe what my date did tonight."

-Amy: "Do he use a coupon!?!"

-Jane: "Yes! That cheapskate dared to provide me with the same date as I'd otherwise have had, but he did so at a lower cost! I'm so insulted! There is no way I'm going on another date with John."

-Amy: "Well, Jane, I know this really hot spendthrift at work. I think you'd like him. He wastes money left and right and is so deep in debt it just makes me so hot just dreaming about it. I know for sure he'd never use a coupon. If I wasn't married, I'd grab him up in a second myself."

-Jane: "Thanks, Amy. That sounds just like the kind of financially irresponsible man I want."

Yes, I'm totally mystified at to how getting the same thing at a lower price is deemed unacceptable.

Over the weekend I ordered a new pair of New Balance shoes from Onlineshoes.com for $54.99, as they had the lowest price I could find on that model and I used them for my prior pair as they had the best price then too. Same shoe no matter how much I pay. On Sunday at 10 AM I bought a laser printer for $60. I Could have paid $120 on Saturday before it went on sale half off, but paying twice as much for the same thing didn't strike me as prudent.

Do women feel personally devalued by men who use coupons as in "he doesn't think I'm worthy of full price"? I can only guess that's the logic (if we dare call it logic).:stu That, of course, makes no sense since he's buying a meal, not you.


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## shyvr6 (Feb 18, 2008)

UltraShy said:


> One question for those who would not like their date to use a coupon: would you be impressed if he told you how deeply in debt he is due to his complete lack of regard for responsible spending?


I doubt anyone would be impressed and it would most likely be a red flag. If you're using coupons because of legitimite reasons besides being irresponsible, then that is one thing. If you're using them because you're just cheap, then you can't help but wonder how your future with this person will be. Will this person be constantly nickel and diming stuff? Will this person let you buy things within reason without complaining about it? Is this the type of person that will squeeze toothpaste out of old toothpaste tubes and put them all into one bottle to save money? These are things that I would wonder about if I was on a date with someone like that.


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## meowgirl (Aug 24, 2009)

This is getting so complicated...it depends on the type of coupon for me lol. like 20% off, etcetera, I would be cool with, that's just smart spending. But when it gets to the Buy 1 get 1 free coupon... ooooooohhhh:b Not on the first date, because then it would make me wonder if you would have paid for my meal without that coupon. The second dates and afterward, I wouldn't care.


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## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

I don't see the big deal in using coupons. If they're that picky then they wouldn't be worth dating anyway. If you can save money why not?


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## AliBaba (Nov 16, 2005)

If I'm out with a lady I consider a real sensitive, willowy type, I'll go with my handy pocket coupon organizer:










However, if I'm out with a foxy mama who is a more aggressive type and likes things a little "bigger" wink), I'll normally retreat to my car and retrieve this bad boy:










You'll note this model has room for your standard "coupon spread sheet" for a quicker search. I find the key to success is remaining flexible with at least a couple of options depending on personality.


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## caflme (Jun 7, 2009)

AliBaba said:


> If I'm out with a lady I consider a real sensitive, willowy type, I'll go with my handy pocket coupon organizer:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


:haha:haha:haha priceless.... (pun intended)


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## letitrock (Jan 10, 2009)

Shauna The Dead said:


> I don't see the big deal in using coupons. If they're that picky then they wouldn't be worth dating anyway. If you can save money why not?


uke


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## Witan (Jun 13, 2009)

letitrock said:


> What do you think of using coupons on a date, especially on a first date?
> 
> Would you use them on a first date?


NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!

Especially not on a first date, goodness!


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

Shauna The Dead said:


> I don't see the big deal in using coupons. If they're that picky then they wouldn't be worth dating anyway. If you can save money why not?


Such a wise young woman.


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## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

Classified said:


> *Where would you go that you could even use a coupon onna first date? *Maybe I don't pay attention to the coupons enough.


Good point.


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## Futures (Aug 27, 2005)

VanDamMan said:


> After more thought, I think it woudl be a good way to weed out the shallow people you are going out with. I might do it just as a test.





Shauna The Dead said:


> I don't see the big deal in using coupons. If they're that picky then they wouldn't be worth dating anyway. If you can save money why not?


:agree

If a girl isn't going to go on a second date because of a coupon, then I'd say it's a good thing that the guy didn't waste more money on her shallow ***.


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## Rasputin_1 (Oct 27, 2008)

You know I probably would not use a coupon on a first date because unfortunately I care a lot more about social norms then I wish I did. But its odd to me that so many women would be offended. Does it really bring you down that much to think a guy is trying to save a few bucks. It does not lower the value of the date or anything like that, you are still getting the same exact food/experience. 

So if we were on a date and I was like "I am having such a good time" then took out a $50 and lit it on fire. Would you be thinking "wow! he must really think im worth a lot if hes willing to do that on a first date!"


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## caflme (Jun 7, 2009)

Rasputin_1 said:


> You know I probably would not use a coupon on a first date because unfortunately I care a lot more about social norms then I wish I did. But its odd to me that so many women would be offended. Does it really bring you down that much to think a guy is trying to save a few bucks. It does not lower the value of the date or anything like that, you are still getting the same exact food/experience.
> 
> *So if we were on a date and I was like "I am having such a good time" then took out a $50 and lit it on fire. Would you be thinking "wow! he must really think im worth a lot if hes willing to do that on a first date!"*


:haha exactly... since when is our self worth as a women determined by whether men are spending money on us? It would seem to be a more reliable indicator that a man is financially responsible and trustworthy, therefore a better provider.

That being said if he asked me what I wanted to do and I really wanted Chinese and a guy only had a coupon for Italian and he insisted that we had to go for Italian - that would irritate me. If he said hey I have a coupon for Italian - wanna grab some pasta... I'd be all in and think it was awesome - especially a buy one get one free.

I mean I see it like this... Get to go out once for a meal that would cost more or get to see a guy more often because he's saved a few bucks with coupons. I mean the goal is to get to spend time WITH HIM, not the food right, not the money right, the goal is to have TIME and if he saves some money then that means more time he has to spend with you because he will have to work less, stress about money less AND have more money in case ya'll want to see each other more often and go do more things.

Example... a $20 meal... say he has a $5 off coupon. That's maybe another date to go grab coffee together or an ice cream cone or a hot dog. So the coupon means you may get another date instead of just one. Because the goal is to get to see your guy.


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## meowgirl (Aug 24, 2009)

AliBaba said:


> If I'm out with a lady I consider a real sensitive, willowy type, I'll go with my handy pocket coupon organizer:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


:lol Damn, I actually want the first thing. X3


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

The only negative I can think that'll come out of this is that the girl would think that the guy is cheap and wouldn't do anything nice for the woman in general. In other words, save all the money for himself while treat the woman cheaply. Like for instance, the guy wouldn't bother to shell out money once in a while to treat or buy something nice for the woman when he does have money saved up, but only spends it all on himself and not the woman. I'm not saying this is about all the guys I'm just saying there are guys that want all the money to themselves and not willing to treat the woman out.

I wouldn't use coupons on a first date, it can turn off a woman. You should use it after you two discuss about it and are okay with it.


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

shyvr6 said:


> I doubt anyone would be impressed and it would most likely be a red flag. If you're using coupons because of legitimite reasons besides being irresponsible, then that is one thing. If you're using them because you're just cheap, then you can't help but wonder how your future with this person will be. Will this person be constantly nickel and diming stuff? Will this person let you buy things within reason without complaining about it? Is this the type of person that will squeeze toothpaste out of old toothpaste tubes and put them all into one bottle to save money? These are things that I would wonder about if I was on a date with someone like that.


My thoughts, EXACTLY. I would worry that the guy would be so money conscious when he wouldn't have to be.


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## Dub16 (Feb 28, 2010)

Using them on a date is iffy.

Using them to pay FOR a date is a really bad sign though!


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## MidnightBlu (Jun 11, 2006)

Oh yeah and I'm a discount and coupon person! It would be awesome if me and my (future) bf saved money together, but I think it's tacky if a guy used a coupon on the first date. After awhile we can be as cheap together, but yeah... I just want a good impression on the guy. I don't want to have to worry about money stuff in the beginning. Maybe I'm just too paranoid.


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