# Favorite Movie One Liners



## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

Every once in a while I come across a line from a movie that I just find funny/odd/neat. More often they're the former  So post your favorite one liners here, with a youtube clip if possible =D

So many to choose from, but a classic Arnold one to start off...


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

"I'm finished"


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## VCL XI (Jan 19, 2004)




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## Catching Fire (Apr 23, 2009)

This fights gonna end with two hits my fist hitting you and you hitting the ground- The Breakfast Club


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## ChrissyQ (Apr 15, 2009)

NO ONE puts Baby in the corner! 

(Dirty Dancing)

lol


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## doomflower (Jul 26, 2009)

*Anything Johnny Said in Airplane.*


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## ChrissyQ (Apr 15, 2009)

Oh REAAAAALLYYYYYYYYYYY!? ALRIGHTYYY THEN! 

Jim Carrey Ace Ventura

lol


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

ChrissyQ said:


> NO ONE puts Baby in the corner!
> 
> (Dirty Dancing)
> 
> lol


This line reminds me of Family Guy now lol.

Swayze: No one puts Baby in the corner!

Dad: Actually I do, because I'm her father and she's 16! How old are you, 35?

Swayze:...42. 

*Police drag him away*

Lol. Too funny.


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

ChrissyQ said:


> Oh REAAAAALLYYYYYYYYYYY!? ALRIGHTYYY THEN!
> 
> Jim Carrey Ace Ventura
> 
> lol


Haha, Jim Carrey has a lot of good one liners 

Here's a John Goodman one ...


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## david86 (Feb 24, 2009)

Bond is cool, sandlot is funny, nuff said.


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

"**** it dude, let's go bowling"


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## AliBaba (Nov 16, 2005)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> "**** it dude, let's go bowling"


Haha...we might have 100 from that movie alone:

(grimly)
The story is ludicrous.

MAUDE
Lord. You can imagine where it goes 
from here.

DUDE
He fixes the cable?


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## Zeddicus (Apr 1, 2009)




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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> "I'm finished"


is it from "there will be blood" ?


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

ahhh, I love the smell of napalm in the morning


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## bezoomny (Feb 10, 2007)

"No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!"


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## EagerMinnow84 (Sep 1, 2007)

"What are you, a lawyer?"
"With friends like you, who needs friends?"
"Yeah, I was in the sh*t."
"Unlock it!"

~ Rushmore. One of my favorite films.


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## bezoomny (Feb 10, 2007)

EagerMinnow84 said:


> "What are you, a lawyer?"
> "With friends like you, who needs friends?"
> "Yeah, I was in the sh*t."
> "Unlock it!"
> ...


"I saved Latin. What did you ever do?"


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

"My precious"


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## lauramarie (Jul 18, 2009)

I can't get "hasta la vista, baby" out of my head.


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

1. it's alive! it's alive!... mwaaahahahahahaha!






2. "I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse."


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## TheGecko (Nov 26, 2007)

The Big Lebowski has hundreds  

One of my favourites from another film: "Hamburgers! The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast"


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## TorLin (Nov 14, 2006)




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## VCL XI (Jan 19, 2004)

"Cop **** his pants!" (_Pope of Greenwich Village_)

"I just deep-sixed two heads." (_Tough Guys Don't Dance_)

"Your song stunk, I hate your suit, and I could hurt you!" (_Lost in America_)


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## Phibes (Mar 8, 2009)

I'm very aroused! (the guy in Anchor-Man). 

what makes it good is my old friend and i were using this line all the time back in highschool and stuff. LOl, it was our little joke, *wasnt even sexual arousal*. just when we were excited.


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## AliBaba (Nov 16, 2005)

Borat: This is my sister. She is number 4 best prostitute in the country of Kazakhstan. 

- after which his sister holds up a piano recital style trophy....:haha

On a personal note I'm still waiting for the right moment when I can introduce my sister in this way.


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

I don't know if it qualifies as a one-liner but I love it at the end of The Color of Money when Paul Newman says "I'm back."


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

or in The Hustler when he says to Jackie Gleason, "I'm the best there is Fats, I'm the best you've ever seen, and even if you beat me, I'm still the best."


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

If you can't spot the sucker after your first half hour at the table...then *you are* the sucker.

---Rounders


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

"I can kill you whenever I please...but not today."

from X-Files episode "musings of a cigarette smoking man"


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## thelonelyloner (Apr 24, 2009)

"Dodge this"


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## Daylight (Jun 20, 2009)

It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

Daylight said:


> It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

"I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that"


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## Jnmcda0 (Nov 28, 2003)

NO WIRE HANGERS EVER!!!!!!!






Garbage Day!


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

"draaaaaaaaaainage"


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## Daxter (Feb 4, 2009)

A man can be an artist... in anything, food, whatever. It depends on how good he is at it. Creasey's art is death. He is about to paint his masterpiece.


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## Dempsey (Jun 27, 2009)

Self-improvement is masturbation. Now self-_destruction_...


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## AliBaba (Nov 16, 2005)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> "draaaaaaaaaainage"


Hah, this took me a second. I wasn't reading it with the correct emphasis.

"I drink your milkshake. I drink it up."


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

"They're coming to get you, Barbara!"

Night of the living dead ( 1968 )

"You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"

Planet of the Apes ( 1968 )


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## RoninDistance (May 23, 2009)

thelonelyloner said:


> "Dodge this"


I love that line. Some of my favorites are:

From "Tropic Thunder", the best scene in the whole movie, "I'm a lead farmer". 






The "unlimited power" scene from Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith.






And of course, a classic from "Cowboy Bebop: Knockin' on Heaven's Door", Spike flirting with Elektra during their fight.

"I love the kind of woman that can kick my ***."


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

RoninDistance said:


> Cowboy Bebop


mmm this looks interesting... i'll DL and have a look!


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

AliBaba said:


> Hah, this took me a second. I wasn't reading it with the correct emphasis.
> 
> "I drink your milkshake. I drink it up."


a lot of people don't realize how full of comic genius that movie is.


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

Pulp Fiction...this movie is a goldmine for one liners...lol.


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## Frankie_Lee (Sep 15, 2008)

"Smokey, this is not 'Nam, this is bowling. There are rules." 
The Big Lebowski

"Terminate...with extreme prejudice."
Apocalypse Now!

"Bob stole his car!" 
Bottle Rocket

"I don't want _Fop_, damnit, I'm a Dapper Dan man."
Oh Brother Where Art Thou


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## Frankie_Lee (Sep 15, 2008)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> a lot of people don't realize how full of comic genius that movie is.


I always laugh at the baptism scene.

"Do you accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?"
"YES I DO!"

just his impatience, with wanting to get it over with. There's another funny line in that scene I can't remember.


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## Were (Oct 16, 2006)

goodfellas : "Now go home and get your ****in' shinebox"
lost highway : "Dick Laurent is dead"

judge dredd :


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## ChrissyQ (Apr 15, 2009)

From one of my fave movies Drop Dead Fred:

Fred: "I am a loner, a crazy wide eyed loner on a doomed mission to Venus to battle with the 3headed mega beast but on the way I caught cornflakes disease. 

Snot face! 

Haven't got a husband! Haven't got a husband! Got a stupid haircut!" lol 


& from The Sandlot:

"Most people never take the chance to do something great, either because they're too scared, or they don't recognize it when it spits on their shoes."
- The Babe, The Sandlot

"Follow your heart, kid, and you'll never go wrong."
- The Babe, The Sandlot


From Poltergeist:

They're HERE!

Don't MESS with the Babysitter!
Adventures In Babysitting

Mrs. Doubtfire “Ever wish you could freeze frame a moment in your day and look at it and say ‘this is not my life’”, Daniel Hillard (Robin Williams)


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## citizen_erased (Dec 18, 2007)

Snakes on a Plane


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

Office Space ... PC Load Letter


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## rumjungle (Feb 13, 2009)

"Get to the chopper!"


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

Fox Mulder quote:

"I would never lie. I willfully participate in a campaign of misinformation."


another quote from the X-Files:

"Don't try and threaten me, Mulder. I've watched presidents die."


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

form south park:

Cartman: Give me your Jew gold now!
Kyle: God damn it, you know I don't carry gold in a little bag around my neck!


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## kikachuck (Nov 10, 2003)

This is an old one that's probably a staple of my childhood, but I forgot all about until somebody mentioned it last night...






IT'S NOT A TUMA!


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## AliBaba (Nov 16, 2005)

This morning I discovered a new gold mine for quality one liners entitled Thank You For Smoking (J.Reitman/2006):

BR: "We don't sell Tic Tacs, we sell cigarettes. And they're cool, available, and *addictive*. The job is almost done for us."


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## Mr. Frostie (Nov 2, 2008)

"When you're smacked, you'll take it and like it!"

"Why don't you quit your cryin' and get me some bourbon?"

"Ever notice how you come across somebody once in awhile you shouldn't have ****ed with? That's me."

"I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six shots or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?"


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

kikachuck said:


> This is an old one that's probably a staple of my childhood, but I forgot all about until somebody mentioned it last night...


Kindergarten Cop was great :lol Mostly because of all the Arnold lines :O

A Jurassic Park one...


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

"Jackie Treehorn treats objects like women, man."


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## MaidMarian (Feb 18, 2009)

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." - Rhett Butler in Gone With the Wind.


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

The Big Lebowski...last line in this scene, "8 year olds, dude" :lol


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## Happ2beme (Jul 13, 2009)

I'll get you my pretty! And your little dog too!

Wicked Witch of the West- The Wizard of OZ


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## miminka (May 10, 2009)

My quote; and "I am God's lonely man..." _Taxi Driver_


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

from speed (1994)

"I'm not crazy Jack, poor people are crazy, I'm rich!"

from Mars Attacks! (1996)

"We have to strike now, sir! Annihilate! Kill! Kill! Kill!"


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## MaidMarian (Feb 18, 2009)

Happ2beme said:


> I'll get you my pretty! And your little dog too!
> 
> Wicked Witch of the West- The Wizard of OZ


:lol oh yeah, i'd forgotten about that one.


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## miminka (May 10, 2009)

"Go ahead, make my day" -_Dirty Harry_


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## VCL XI (Jan 19, 2004)

"Make a move...make my day." (From _Vice Squad, _almost two years before the release of_ Sudden Impact_)


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

from 1984

"If you want a vision of the future, Winston, imagine a boot stamping on a human face forever."


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

from "Back to the future" 1985

"I'm sure that in 1985 plutonium is available in every corner drugstore, but in 1955 it's a little hard to come by."


from "Back to the Future 2" 1989

"I foresee two possibilities. One, coming face to face with herself 30 years older would put her into shock and she'd simply pass out. Or two, the encounter could create a time paradox, the results of which could cause a chain reaction that would unravel the very fabric of the space time continuum, and destroy the entire universe! Granted, that's a worse case scenario. The destruction might in fact be very localized, limited to merely our own galaxy."


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

from *Network* (1976)

"I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!"





 (complete scene)


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## p cdn (Jul 26, 2009)

huh said:


> The Big Lebowski...last line in this scene, "8 year olds, dude" :lol


love that movie :lol

"You want a toe? I can get you a toe believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me."

----

Son of a b*tch, I'm sick of these dolphins. 
& 
Don't point that gun at him, he's an unpaid intern.

- _Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou_


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## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

huh said:


> The Big Lebowski...last line in this scene, "8 year olds, dude" :lol


The Big Lebowski is extremely quotable. Love that movie.

"Nihilists! **** me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it's an ethos."


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## Bakemono (Aug 7, 2009)

"Hope is a good thing, and no good thing ever dies" - Andy Dufresne (The Shawshank Redemption)


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

"Game over, man!" - Aliens. Not sure why, but I just find the way he said it funny...heh.


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

"Alright Mr. Demille, I'm readly for my close-up."


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## scintilla (Dec 10, 2008)

"I'm Walkin' Here!" - Midnight Cowboy
lol, I love Dustin Hoffman.


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

Midnight Cowboy is just all kinds of awesome.


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## theconstant (Aug 6, 2009)

I have come to chew bubblegum and kick a**...and I'm all out bubblegum. - Roddy Piper in They Live


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

"gentlemen, you can't fight in here, this is the war room."


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## Frankie_Lee (Sep 15, 2008)

He'll see everything! He'll see the big board!


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## DuncanThaw (Jun 19, 2009)

"You'd better hurry up. Tell me something to make me love you." -- _Last Night_

This is probably the most elegant, thoughtful end-of-the-world film I've ever seen.


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

"don't think so hard Eddie, you might sprain something."


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## milkyx (Jul 26, 2009)

"Silencio, Old Man!"

- Juno (Such a retarded film , I LOVE IT)


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## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

from Aliens 4

"Earth... What a s***hole."


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## EagerMinnow84 (Sep 1, 2007)

"Royal Tenenbaum bought the house on Archer Ave in the winter of his 35th year."

Opening line from The Royal Tenenbaums.


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## when will we be new skin (Aug 18, 2009)

"Ron, I know it sounds harsh, but God does not want her to live." -- Anchorman

"I'm okay with being unimpressive. I sleep better." -- Garden State

"But that wife of his, Eleanor... Big ****! Huge ****. A real rug muncher. Looked like a big lesbian mule." -- Wedding Crashers


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

Another classic Arnold one liner, this one from _The Running Man_ :lol


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## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

Im sure this one has already been said but just in case "The truth? You cant handle the truth."
Or how about "I cant chew the leather anymore so why should I be allowed to share in the tribes provisions" Scent of a Woman, Al Pacino. Actually, Scent of a Woman had about 20 classical quotes lol.


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

Well, um, icing happen when the puck come down, bang you know, before the other guys you know. Nobody there, you know. My arm go comes up then the game stop then start up. 

--Denis Lemieux from Slapshot


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

Any of you ******* pr*cks move, and I'll execute every mother ******* last one of ya! 

---Honey Bunny, Pulp Fiction


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

pokeherpro said:


> Any of you ******* pr*cks move, and I'll execute every mother ******* last one of ya!
> 
> ---Honey Bunny, Pulp Fiction


holy crap I was just thinking of posting this one. I remember watching this movie with a friend for the first time when I was 14 and we used to just play that over and over again and laugh.


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> holy crap I was just thinking of posting this one. I remember watching this movie with a friend for the first time when I was 14 and we used to just play that over and over again and laugh.


Do you remember a song in the 90's called Scooby Snacks by Fun Lovin Criminals? Ahaha. I hope you do, it was popular a long time ago.


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

noooooo....


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## nothing to fear (Mar 23, 2005)

It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever It's told. It puts the lotion on Its skin or else It gets the hose again. Now it puts the lotion in the basket. PUT THE ****ING LOTION IN THE BASKET.


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## nothing to fear (Mar 23, 2005)

Frankie_Lee said:


> He'll see everything! He'll see the big board!


the best movie!


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

nothing to fear said:


> It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever It's told. It puts the lotion on Its skin or else It gets the hose again. Now it puts the lotion in the basket. PUT THE ****ING LOTION IN THE BASKET.


Hey, a little help? Man in the hole..down here. I hear people. Hey...it puts the Joe Dirt in the hole.


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## Happ2beme (Jul 13, 2009)

No More Wire Hanger EVER!

Faye Dunnawy portraying Joan Crawford. Mommie Dearest.


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## VCL XI (Jan 19, 2004)

"Vampires are lucky, they can feed on others. We gotta eat away at ourselves."


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

“Forgiveness is between them and God. It’s my job to arrange the meeting.”

From Man on Fire.


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## AliBaba (Nov 16, 2005)

Just watched Pulp Fiction. It had been a while:

"I used the same soap as you & when I was finished the towel didn't look like no god da*n maxi-pad!" 

I had forgotten about that line. I did a spit take.


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## TimeisAllAround (Aug 16, 2009)

Some Russian Guy said:


> from speed (1994)
> 
> "I'm not crazy Jack, poor people are crazy, I'm rich!"
> 
> ...


Mars Attacks is one of my favorite movies ever. It's so stupid yet so amazing.
---
Best in Show-
"No, that's a bear in a, in a bee costume."

Pretty much everything said in Best in Show was amazing.


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## Efsee (Jul 20, 2009)

from juno when they are reading the parent ads
"'Wholesome, spiritually wealthy couple have found true love with each other.' Aww... all that's missing is your *******."


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## outcast69 (Aug 23, 2009)

"Madness is like gravity,all you need is a little push."---the Joker


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## citizen_erased (Dec 18, 2007)

outcast69 said:


> "Madness is like gravity,all you need is a little push."---the Joker


Good call.

Now let me add this.

"He asked me to forcably insert the lifeline card into my anus!" - Donnie Darko


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## Toad Licker (Nov 2, 2007)

“Do ya feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk” Harry Callahan - Dirty Harry

“You can’t respect someone who kisses your ***. It just doesn’t work” Ferris Bueller - Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

“This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real ****ing gun” Martin Riggs - Lethal Weapon

“I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner” Hannibal Lecter - The Silence of the Lambs

“My mama always said life was like a box a chocolates, never know what you’re gonna get”, Forrest Gump - Forrest Gump


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## epril (Mar 24, 2009)

Some Russian Guy said:


> "They're coming to get you, Barbara!"
> 
> Night of the living dead ( 1968 )
> 
> ...


ooh! Also, 'take your stinking paws off me you damn dirty ape'

"He's dead, Jim" and "this is a good day to die"


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## Imago (Sep 14, 2009)

Hmm, there's so many but here's a few that spring to mind;

"What we do in life echoes in eternity." Gladiator

"Can't rain all the time..." The Crow

"There's no TV! Have you seen a TV, Mike? I haven't seen a TV. Do you know what it means when there's no TV? - No MTV!" The Lost Boys

"Can I sleep in your room? I don't want to sleep on the hide-a bed with Fuller. If he has something to drink, he'll wet the bed."
"I wouldn't let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my ***." Home Alone


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## Pocketfox (Jul 3, 2009)

"Death to Videodrome, long live the new flesh!"

"I'm a HUMAN BEING, God _dammit_! My life has VALUE!'"

"It's true, isn't it? It's the effort that's most important, not what we achieve. lsn't it? To see each other as children. Tormented, helpless, lonely children."

"Loneliness has followed me my whole life. Everywhere. In bars, in cars, sidewalks, stores, everywhere. There's no escape. I'm God's lonely man. June 8th. My life has taken another turn again. The days can go on with regularity over and over, one day indistinguishable from the next. A long continuous chain. Then suddenly, there is a change."

"A mook? You're calling me a mook? What's a mook? What's a mook? You can't call me a mook!"

"I know it was you, Fredo. You broke my heart. _You broke my heart._"

And of course... "Try getting a reservation at Dorsia now--"


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## nothing to fear (Mar 23, 2005)

Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man.


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## KumagoroBeam (Sep 15, 2008)

^
Life does not stop and start at your convenience, you miserable piece of ****.


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## retropat (Aug 25, 2009)

"I am big! It's the pictures that got small."-Norma Desmond in _Sunset Boulevard_. I love looking up movie quotes, but that one always stands out to me among all the others.


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

AliBaba said:


> Just watched Pulp Fiction. It had been a while:
> 
> "I used the same soap as you & when I was finished the towel didn't look like no god da*n maxi-pad!"
> 
> I had forgotten about that line. I did a spit take.


holy **** I forgot that line, I used to laugh everytime I'd hear it.

And you gotta love all the Lebowski quotes on this thread.

Speaking of Tarantino, I went to see Inglourious Basterds again tonight and there are a lot of good lines but "that's a bingo!!!" takes the cake. its brilliant in its randomness and the delivery is perfect.


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## Phibes (Mar 8, 2009)

"I'm very aroused" - AnchorMan.
(Thing is, my friend and I were using that line years before that movie came out (not in a sexual way fyi). But yeah, it made me laugh.


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## Genelle (Aug 19, 2009)

"Young boys should never be sent to bed... they always wake up a day older."

"I suppose it's like the ticking crocodile, isn't it? Time is chasing after all of us, isn't that right?"

"That's a good question, which is usually what adults say if they don't know the answer."

"You know, what is so amazing about you is that you're right. You're always right. And you remember when you're right. And you never let anybody else forget it."


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

"attendez la creme"


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

"Listen, here's the thing: If you can't spot the sucker after your first half-hour at the table...then you _are_ the sucker."

---Rounders


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

"A bruise on the leg is a hell of a long way from the heart."

---Miracle


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## AliBaba (Nov 16, 2005)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> "attendez la creme"


You're totally obsessed with Inglourious Basterds!!!! I like it  As far as the Big Lebowski is concerned, the following exchange is fried gold:

Maude
My art has been commended as being 
strongly vaginal. Which bothers 
some men. The word itself makes 
some men uncomfortable. Vagina.

DUDE
Oh yeah?

MAUDE
Yes, they don't like hearing it and 
find it difficult to say. Whereas 
without batting an eye a man will 
refer to his "d**k" or his "rod" or 
his "Johnson".

DUDE
"Johnson"?

MAUDE
Yes Mr. Lebowski....."Johnson"

MAUDE
Do you like sex, Mr. Lebowski?

DUDE
Excuse me?

MAUDE
Sex. The physical act of love. 
Coitus. Do you like it?

DUDE
I was talking about my rug.

MAUDE
You're not interested in sex?

DUDE
You mean coitus? 

MAUDE
I like it too. It's a male myth 
about feminists that we hate sex. 
It can be a natural, zesty enterprise. 
But unfortunately there are some 
people--it is called satyriasis in 
men, nymphomania in women--who engage 
in it compulsively and without joy.

DUDE
Oh, no.

MAUDE
Oh yes, Mr. Lebowski


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## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

I will smash your face into a car windshield, and then take your mother, Dorothy Mantooth, out for a nice seafood dinner and _never_ call her again.

---Anchorman


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

the Dude is incredibly wise.

and yes I am in love with Inglourious Basterds.


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## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

Dying ain't much of a livin boy -The Outlaw Josey Wales


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## Fishing Fool (Sep 20, 2009)

For you who are a little older...

"What we've got here is failure to communicate...Some men you just can't reach. So you get what we had here last week, which is the way he wants it... well, he gets it. I don't like it any more than you men."

Strother Martin in Cool Hand Luke


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## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

I am big, its the pictures that got small.


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## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

I'm gonna shoot you, too. Your lifes finished anyway. Your friend george is gonna sing like a canary. And so are you. And once you've sung, charlie, my boy, you're gonna take your place on that long, grey line of american manhood. And you will be through.


----------



## stylicho (Nov 8, 2003)

I'm gonna shoot you, too. Your lifes finished anyway. Your friend george is gonna sing like a canary. And so are you. And once you've sung, charlie, my boy, you're gonna take your place on that long, grey line of american manhood. And you will be through.


----------



## tutliputli (Feb 22, 2009)

"I like your sleeves".


----------



## Crunchie (Sep 21, 2009)

"Heeeeere's Johnny"






and - "Wendy, I'm Home..."
*[Sorry i haven't found another better on from that "remix"]*


----------



## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

Sometimes I wish I had never met you. Because then I could go to sleep at night not knowing there was someone like you out there. 


---Good Will Hunting


----------



## ShyFX (Mar 6, 2006)

"You guys gotta get me out of here! There's this guy Nasty Nate who wants my cocktail fruit, and everyone here likes fresh fish!"


"**** you, **** you, **** you, you're cool, and **** you, I'm out!"


----------



## pokeherpro (Jun 17, 2009)

ShyFX said:


> "You guys gotta get me out of here! There's this guy Nasty Nate who wants my cocktail fruit, and everyone here likes fresh fish!"
> 
> "**** you, **** you, **** you, you're cool, and **** you, I'm out!"


Marijuana? Marijuana!? Man, that is some ********! Marijuana is not a drug. I used to **** **** for ****. Now that's an addiction. You ever **** some **** for marijuana?

Excellent movie. Dave Chappelle is one of the funniest people to ever live.


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

Obviously you're not a golfer.


----------



## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

gentlemen you can't fight in here, this is the war room.


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

You have good taste in movies IHeartSteveMcQueen!

Love Sunset Blvd & Strangelove...


----------



## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

thanks. Dr. Strangelove is possibly the best movie ever made.


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

Yeah, for sure.

"Well now, what happened is... ahm... one of our base commanders, he had a sort of... well, he went a little funny in the head... you know... just a little... funny."


----------



## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

lol, everyone talks about Peter Sellers but I always thought that George C. Scott stole the movie.


----------



## imt (Sep 22, 2008)

_Oh s#*t it's the cops. _ - Seth Rogen


----------



## ShyFX (Mar 6, 2006)

pokeherpro said:


> Marijuana? Marijuana!? Man, that is some ********! Marijuana is not a drug. I used to **** **** for ****. Now that's an addiction. You ever **** some **** for marijuana?
> 
> Excellent movie. Dave Chappelle is one of the funniest people to ever live.


haha yeah man, I love that movie. Dave is a genius.


----------



## ShyFX (Mar 6, 2006)

I like these too..

"60% of the time it works, every time." -Anchorman 

"You shut your mouth when you're talking to me!" -Wedding Crashers 

"I respect women! I love women! I respect them so much that I completely stay away from them!" -40 Year Old Virgin


----------



## Dempsey (Jun 27, 2009)

"If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?"

No country for old men. I love the hitman.


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

Yeah Sellers does seem to get all the hype. Not that I don't think he derserves it, but George C.Scott was just as funny.


----------



## nothing to fear (Mar 23, 2005)

definitely my favourite movie. 
the best/my faouvite essay i've ever written was done on dr. strangelove and the cold war.


----------



## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

Walk the Line.

Johnny says to June something like, tell me you don't love me. June says, I don't love you.

Johnny says, 

"You're a Liar". 

I love that.


----------



## Tristram (Feb 9, 2008)

"You brought two too many."

Harmonica


----------



## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

JayDontCareEh said:


> Yeah Sellers does seem to get all the hype. Not that I don't think he derserves it, but George C.Scott was just as funny.


Sellers is great but I thought that Scott was on a completely different level. its definitely one of the top performances of that era. I actually thought Sellers' best performance was in Being There.


----------



## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

^that *was* brilliant.


----------



## Nex (Sep 17, 2009)

FBI Agent: "_You're_ volenteering to deliver drugs to one of the most dangerous druglords in Russia?"

Miles: "_Helllll_ nah!"


----------



## TheDaffodil (Jun 20, 2009)

"Rock stars have kidnapped my son!" - Elaine.
---
"I hurt the flower." - Russell.
---
"Let's deflower the kid." - Polexia.
---
"Please don't give him any more acid." -William.
_Almost Famous_. 

"I choose the money." - Dennis.
_Hostage_.

"To get on top of things and stay there." - Norman Vincent Peale.
"Does that mean women, too?" - Big Edie.
_Grey Gardens_


----------



## Lumiere (Jun 13, 2009)

"We want the finest wines available to humanity, we want them here, and we want them now."

"Look at that. "Accident Blackspot"? These aren't accidents. They're throwing themselves into the road gladly. Throwing themselves into the road to escape all this hideousness."

"We've gone on holiday by mistake."

"Throw yourself into the road, darling - you haven't got a chance."

"My thumbs have gone weird."

"Even a stopped clock tells the right time twice a day, and for once I'm inclined to believe Withnail is right. We are indeed drifting into the arena of the unwell."

--Withnail & I.


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

nothing to fear said:


> definitely my favourite movie.
> the best/my faouvite essay i've ever written was done on dr. strangelove and the cold war.


That's some cool beans.

Naturally your paper landed you a nice grade, huh?


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> Sellers is great but I thought that Scott was on a completely different level. its definitely one of the top performances of that era. I actually thought Sellers' best performance was in Being There.


I haven't seen many movies with Peter Sellers...besides Stranglove I've only seen Lolita and The Pink Panther. He was awesome in both, though.

Haven't seen much of G.C.S either... the only other was a Canadian horror movie called The Changeling. It was amazing btw.

I'll be sure to seek out Being There...


----------



## TreeFrog (Oct 17, 2007)

Nine to Five:

"I'm a doctor. So why the hell am I talking to you? Piss off."

"I'm no fool. I've killed the boss, you think they're not gonna fire me for a thing like that?"

"You're a sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot."

"You're foul, Hart. A wart on the nose of humanity and I'm going to blast it off."

"I'm as nice as I know how to be to every single person in that office. Everyone treats ME like a... ******* at a family reunion."

"That's just great! We just waltz into the hospital and say, "We're sorry, we made a mistake." Well, maybe they'll give us Hart's body in exchange!"

"Well, I say we hire a couple'a wranglers to go upstairs and beat the **** out of him."


----------



## shadowmask (Jun 22, 2009)

_"Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in."_


----------



## MrWorry (Sep 5, 2009)

"Are you a peter puffer?"-Gunnery Sergeant Hartman

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHH
THAT'S A WAR FACE
NOW LET ME SEE your WAR FACE!



"Say hello to my little friend", Tony Montana (Al Pacino)

"You can't handle the truth", Colonel Nathan Jessup (Jack Nicholson)
"I'm gonna rip out your eyeballs and piss in your dead skull"

"Well I'm a mushroom cloud-layin' motherf*cker, motherf*cker!" - Jules

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did that break your concentration?"

"Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?" Mr. Blonde


----------



## FishingWithLoki (Sep 25, 2009)

Heineken? F* that Sh*t! PABST BLUE RIBBON!


----------



## TreeFrog (Oct 17, 2007)

FishingWithLoki said:


> Heineken? F* that Sh*t! PABST BLUE RIBBON!


OMG! I forgot about that one!

My friends and I used to go around saying that all the time. LOL


----------



## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

the Dennis Hopper PBR quote is just all kinds of win.


----------



## tree1609 (May 22, 2009)

whatsername75 said:


> "What's with you today?"
> "What's with today, today?"
> - Empire Records


thats a good one, i love that movie


----------



## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

from Enemy of the State ( 1998 )

"You're either very smart... or incredibly stupid"

"The only privacy that's left is the inside of your head"


----------



## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

from Armageddon ( 1998 )

"American components, Russian components, ALL MADE IN TAIWAN!"


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe **** yourself.


----------



## Ian231 (Sep 17, 2009)

You Lose! Good Day Sir!


----------



## MrWorry (Sep 5, 2009)

"Funny, how?"

"Do i amuse you"


----------



## IHeartSteveMcQueen (May 30, 2009)

I want you to hold it between your knees.


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

-_"Let me ask you something. If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?"_


----------



## bookscoffee (Oct 10, 2009)

"Keep knockin' on the devils door long enough, someone's gonna answer you." - Lt. Green _Four Brothers_

"Witless and scared sh-tless." - Billy Darly _Death Sentence_


----------



## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

I went to Saw 6 last night. I didn't expect any one-liners, but that scene with John (Tobin Bell) talking to the exec of the insurance company, then the camera going to John as he looks in the guys fishtank and says "Oh, piranha" with a bit of excitement had me chuckling a bit, heh. It was just really random.


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

"Charlie don't surf!"


----------



## JMX (Feb 26, 2008)

"I love the smell of napalm in the morning"


----------



## scooby (Jun 24, 2009)

Continuing the Apocalypse now quotes:

Colonel Kurtz - We train young men to drop fire on people, but their commanders wont allow them to write "f***" on their airplane because its obscene.



Colonel Kurtz - The horror... the horror...


----------



## pyramidsong (Apr 17, 2005)

IHeartSteveMcQueen said:


> "Jackie Treehorn treats objects like women, man."


 "Yeah, well, y'know, that's just like, uh, your *opinion*, man."


----------



## KaiserNeptune (Nov 3, 2009)

"Saddle up, lock n' load!"
It's from the epic John Wayne movie, The Sands of Iwo Jima.


----------



## epril (Mar 24, 2009)

*Psychiatrist*: Tell me, Harold, how many of these, eh, *suicides* have you performed? 
*Harold*: An accurate number would be difficult to gauge. 
*Psychiatrist*: Well, just give me a rough estimate. 
*Harold*: A rough estimate? I'd say 
[_savoring the thought_] 
*Harold*: fifteen. 
*Psychiatrist*: Fifteen? 
*Harold*: That's a rough estimate. 
*Psychiatrist*: Were they all done for your mother's benefit? 
*Harold*: No. No, I would not say "benefit."


----------



## Some Russian Guy (Mar 20, 2009)

*from "Twelve monkeys" (1995)

James Cole*: She's not honey babe, she's a doctor. My psychiatrist. Understand? 
*Charlie the Hotel Clerk*: Whatever gets it up for you, Jack.

and there's also a quote that is not on imdb

"I'm not insane, I'm mentally divergent"


----------



## KumagoroBeam (Sep 15, 2008)

"I guess there's just two kinds of people, Miss Sandstone: MY kind of people, and *******s. It's rather obvious which category you fit into. Have a nice day."

From Pink Flamingos


----------



## bookscoffee (Oct 10, 2009)

"Oh, Walther P99 that will blow a whole through any theory. - Kim (88 Minutes - Alicia Witt)

"They say dead man tell no tales, but they sure leave important s--- lying around." - Bobby Mercer (Four Brothers - Mark Wahlberg

"How come we only ask ourselves the really big questions when something bad happens?" - Tommy Corn (I Heart Huckabees - Mark Wahlberg)

"I'm a woman. We don't say what we want but we do reserve the right to get p--sed off when we don't get it. That's what makes us so fascinating, and not a little bit scary." - Sliding Doors


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

"And even if he's a lazy man - and the Dude was most certainly that. Quite possibly the laziest in all of Los Angeles County, which would place him high in the runnin' for laziest worldwide."


----------



## bookscoffee (Oct 10, 2009)

"I'm not nervous, I'm alert!" - Tremors 2


----------



## thewall (Feb 1, 2009)

"They don't have a good bathroom to do coke in."


----------



## Your Crazy (Feb 17, 2009)

"Silly rabbit,"
"Trixs are for"
"kids"


----------



## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

"Whats the **** is this?" *holds up bowling ball*

"Well you're obviously not a golfer"

The big Lebowski.


"Dude if you want a toe i'll get you a toe... with nailpolish."


----------



## seastar (Mar 27, 2009)

Sabrina don't just stare at it, eat it.


----------



## eclectic melotic (Mar 3, 2009)

*I Don't Know If You Knew This But, I'm Kinda A Big Deal... People Know Me.*


----------



## thewall (Feb 1, 2009)

You just got killed by a Daewoo Lanos, mother****er!


----------



## HTF (Nov 15, 2009)

"You either do what the **** we tell you, or I'll bury this axe in your collaborating skull."


----------



## Dub16 (Feb 28, 2010)

"Ra wuff, wuff, ruff"

(taken from Lassie the Movie)


----------



## Emptyheart (Sep 15, 2009)

"Can I have your tots?"


----------



## sherbert (Jun 24, 2005)

" I don't want Fop god dammit! I'm a Dapper Dan Man!"
-Everett from "O' Brother Where Art thou?"

and not so much because it is a good on-liner, but because of his delivery. 


"It's called Drainage! ...starts to drink your milkshake... I... drink... your... milkshake!"
-Daniel, "There will be Blood"


"Andy Dufresne - who crawled through a river of **** and came out clean on the other side."
Red, "The Shawshank Redemption"


----------



## ilikebooks (Nov 26, 2008)

"Roses are red, violets are blue: **** you, *****." (500) Days of Summer


----------



## Hello22 (Feb 10, 2010)

I would but I have too many favourites and most of them are from Scarface which are full of bad language!!


----------



## HTF (Nov 15, 2009)

Nobody's gonna **** on you! I'm on your side! I hate Godzilla! I hate him too! I hate him! He destroys cities! *Please*! This isn't your fault. I'll get you some pants.


----------



## shymtealhead (Feb 16, 2010)

the chief in the big fight scene for super troopers:

"I'm drunk enough to kick your ***!"

gets me every time lol


----------



## Altered (Mar 2, 2010)

"We can't stop here, this is bat country." 

- Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas


----------



## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

"you must cut down the largest tree in the forest with a herring" 
"she turned me into a newt....i got better"
"How you English say, I one more time-a unclog my nose in your direction, sons of a window-dresser! So, you think you couldout-clever us French folk with your silly knees-bent running about advancing behavior! I wave my private parts at your aunties, you heaving lot of second-hand electric donkey bottom biters"
-Monty Python and the holy grail


----------



## ilikebooks (Nov 26, 2008)

Keith said:


> "you must cut down the largest tree in the forest with a herring"
> "she turned me into a newt....i got better"
> "How you English say, I one more time-a unclog my nose in your direction, sons of a window-dresser! So, you think you couldout-clever us French folk with your silly knees-bent running about advancing behavior! I wave my private parts at your aunties, you heaving lot of second-hand electric donkey bottom biters"
> -Monty Python and the holy grail


"We are now the Knights who say... Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z'nourrwringmm."

Excellent taste in movies, sir.


----------



## HTF (Nov 15, 2009)

I don't want a Large Farva, I want a god damn liter of cola!


----------



## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

ilikebooks said:


> "We are now the Knights who say... Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z'nourrwringmm."
> 
> Excellent taste in movies, sir.


thanks! its probably my favorite movie


----------



## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

HTF said:


> I don't want a Large Farva, I want a god damn liter of cola!


"does that look like spit to you?"
super troopers classic!


----------



## HTF (Nov 15, 2009)

Keith said:


> "does that look like spit to you?"
> super troopers classic!


lol, 
"want me to dimpa size your meal for .25?"
"want me to punch-a-size your face for free?"


----------



## Ambivert (Jan 16, 2010)

"I ate his liver with fava beans and a nice chianti"

-Hannibal Lector


----------



## gg87 (Sep 26, 2006)

"When I graduated from first grade, all my dad did was tell me to get a job."
-Billy Madison

"Dude. Anyone can get past a dog. Nobody ****s with a lion!"

"Dude, you know you can't raise your voice like that when the lion comes!"
-Grandma's Boy


----------



## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

"Bill 'Groundhog Day, Ghostbustin' ***' Murray!"
- Gza


----------



## KumagoroBeam (Sep 15, 2008)

_Life is great. Without it, you'd be dead. _
- Gummo


----------



## tutliputli (Feb 22, 2009)

"Pooping back and forth forever."


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

gg87 said:


> "Dude. Anyone can get past a dog. Nobody ****s with a lion!"
> 
> "Dude, you know you can't raise your voice like that when the lion comes!"
> -Grandma's Boy


:yes

I actually laughed really hard just reading these. Such a funny movie.

Another one from Grandma's Boy.

(Alex looking through the fridge after smoking a joint)
"I don't know what you are but I'm going to ****in' eat you too!"


----------



## VIncymon (Apr 16, 2009)

"Do you speak for the entire human race."

Klatu .. *the day the world stood still.*


----------



## Neptunus (Oct 29, 2007)

"Time to nut up, or shut up." -Zombieland


----------



## gg87 (Sep 26, 2006)

JayDontCareEh said:


> :yes
> 
> I actually laughed really hard just reading these. Such a funny movie.
> 
> ...


yep...there are so many good quotes from that movie.


----------



## mtbrider03 (Nov 3, 2005)

*old school pink panther*


----------



## Mister Mxyzptlk (Feb 13, 2010)

"You know how I know you're gay? You like Coldplay." -The 40 Year Old Virgin


----------



## zomgz (Aug 17, 2009)

"Uh... I think we need to pull a Panama!" -Sahara

"And your best man was a goat? I was supposed to be that goat!" -Psych

"I saw it on TV, pee on it!!!" -LOST

"Yeah, 'til he rises from the dead. Dude, I know how this works. This is going to end with you and me running through the jungle screaming crying. He catches me first because I'm heavy and I get cramps." -LOST


----------



## Altered (Mar 2, 2010)

Only a white man would make a fire for everyone to see.

-Dances with Wolves


----------



## AliBaba (Nov 16, 2005)

tutliputli said:


> "Pooping back and forth forever."


You'll have to remind me what this is from??? I know I heard it and I laughed.


----------



## tutliputli (Feb 22, 2009)

AliBaba said:


> You'll have to remind me what this is from??? I know I heard it and I laughed.


It's from 'Me and You and Everyone We Know'


----------



## papaSmurf (Jun 16, 2008)

tutliputli said:


> "Pooping back and forth forever."


Yeeeeeeeeees! I adore that movie, but whenever I show it to my friends they just end up getting confused. In any event, Miranda July is my secret love.

----------------------------------------------
Let me see if I can think of a few...

"I see you are exceptionally good"

"Sorry I'm late."
"That's okay, time doesn't exist."

"I'll swallow your soul! I'll swallow your soul!"

"Okay, imagine you're a tree."

"We met at Starbucks. Not at the same Starbucks but we saw each other at different Starbucks across the street from each other."


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

I'm gonna go have a smoke right now. You want a smoke? You don't smoke, do ya, right? What are ya, one of those fitness freaks, huh? Go **** yourself. - Cpt. Ellerby

The Departed.


----------



## seastar (Mar 27, 2009)

"Yes, I'm drunk. And you're beautiful. And tomorrow morning, I'll be sober but you'll still be beautiful." - The Dreamers.


----------



## C 13 (Feb 21, 2010)

"Would you f*** me? I'd f*** me" - Buffalo Bill, Silence of the Lambs :b


----------



## lonelygirl88 (Dec 25, 2009)

this is not a one liner but its funny...
"*Jason*: Is your muffin buttered? 
*Cady*: What? 
*Jason*: Would you like us to assign someone to butter your muffin? 
*Cady*: My what?"

*Mrs. George*: [_as Regina and her boyfriend are making out on Regina's bed_] Can I get you guys anything? Some snacks? A condom? Let me know! Oh, God love ya.

"*Regina*: I gave him EVERYTHING. I was half a virgin when I met him!"

"*Regina*: I CAN'T GO TO TACO BELL, I'M ON AN ALL-CARB DIET. God, Karen, you are SO stupid!"

"*Regina George*: It's called the South Beach Fat Flush and all you drink is cranberry juice for 72 hours."


----------



## gg87 (Sep 26, 2006)

"Dude, get out of your head. It's really nice out here."...words to live by.


----------



## zookeeper (Jun 3, 2009)

"Nice marmot."
- the Dude


----------



## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

^i've never seen that, but that's pretty funny because we actually worked with a Dr. Marmot, an expert in old buildings. She *was* pretty furry...

whenever she left our office, we'd say, "that's some marmot"


----------



## Witchcraft (Jan 19, 2010)

"You look a hundred per cent better when I can't see you."


----------



## SuperSaiyan (Dec 8, 2009)

"Say Hello to my Little Friend!" - Tony Montanna (Scarface 1983)


----------



## BetaBoy90 (Jan 5, 2010)

"Oh my god, I cant believe I shot Bill Murray" 

"TRY GETTING A RESERVATION AT DORSIA NOW YOU STUPID ****ING *******!!!!!


----------



## Catlover4100 (Feb 10, 2009)

"Kmart sucks!"


----------



## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

Catlover4100 said:


> "Kmart sucks!"


:lol classic, best line in the movie!


----------



## Bewil (Jan 3, 2010)

Udall: You make me want to be a better man.

Connelly: ...That's maybe the best compliment of my life.

Udall: Well, maybe I overshot a little, because I was aiming at just enough to keep you from walking out. 

~As Good as It Gets


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

_Ah, "Sent-e-mental value." I've heard of that. _

Viggo Mortensen/ Eatern Promises


----------



## Selbbin (Aug 10, 2010)

Do you know what's wrong with you? Nothing! - Audrey Hepburn - Charade


----------



## ThrashtilDeath (Mar 21, 2009)

_I ain't got time to bleed._


----------



## Belshazzar (Apr 12, 2010)

"You're guarding space? That's stupid, isn't it? Because someone could break in there and steal all the ****in' space and you wouldn't know it's gone, would you?" - Johnny, Naked

Henry Drummond: _"_You poor slob! You're all alone. When you go to your grave, there won't be anybody to pull the grass up over your head. Nobody to mourn you. Nobody to give a damn. You're all alone. 
EK Hornbeck: "You're wrong, Henry. You'll be there. You're the type. Who else would defend my right to be lonely?" - Inherit the Wind

*"*One gay beer for my gay friend, one normal beer for me because I am normal." - Ray, In Bruges

"Put that coffee down. Coffee's for closers only." - Blake, Glenngarry Glenn Ross, from possibly the best rant in cinematic history:






"Third prize is you're fired."

And, of course, the best Ahnold one-liner goes to:


----------



## SlightlyJaded (Jun 5, 2009)

"Get off me, you bodaggit!" -Napoleon Dynamite. 

Never fails to make me laugh.


----------



## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

lonelygirl88 said:


> everyone knows the best movie one liners come from mean girls. and if you don't... get with it!
> 
> this is not a one liner but its funny...
> "*Jason*: Is your muffin buttered?
> ...


Haha, that movie was genius!


----------



## Cleary (Nov 10, 2007)

everything after 0:31 but specifically "Calm down. We'll do it anyway"





Not exactly a 'one liner' but the entire confession from American Psycho





"I hate carbs!"










"You just wiggled your finger. That's wonderful!"
"I've always been a quick healer."


----------



## low (Sep 27, 2009)

*Insert generic Schwarzenegger 80's liner*

Still awesome though. Love em.

- Stick around.
- He had to split.
- Please excuse my friend, he is dead tired.
Many more.


----------



## disk (Aug 25, 2010)

“Men do the things they do to become the men they want to be.” The Wackness · 2008 · '


----------



## lazy calm (Aug 1, 2010)

*tits. *****. whoo-ah! (ha!)*






no i'm just getting warmed up 






Bill Murray (rushmore) such a genuine guy


----------



## hunterkyrie (Jan 5, 2006)

Phibes said:


> I'm very aroused! (the guy in Anchor-Man).
> 
> what makes it good is my old friend and i were using this line all the time back in highschool and stuff. LOl, it was our little joke, *wasnt even sexual arousal*. just when we were excited.


*Ron Burgundy*: I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal. 
*Veronica Corningstone*: Really. 
*Ron Burgundy*: People know me. 
*Veronica Corningstone*: Well, I'm very happy for you. 
*Ron Burgundy*: I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

LOL


----------



## Chairman Dan (Jul 20, 2010)

"It's not a tumor!"


----------



## littlemisshy (Aug 10, 2010)

Frankly my darling, I don't give a damn! (Gone with the Wind)


----------



## Gorillaz (Jul 13, 2010)

aim for the bushes


----------



## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)

^What movie is that from?
--------------------------------------------------------------

_The gates will open automatically, be sure to take a right at the end of the drive. If you turn left... the road will lead you deeper into the woods... and you may never be seen again._

Tom Wilkinson/The Ghost Writer


----------



## Gorillaz (Jul 13, 2010)

JayDontCareEh said:


> ^What movie is that from?
> The Other Guys
> 
> These two police cops think their invincible and say that right before they jump off a 20 story building


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## Robot the Human (Aug 20, 2010)

"And as sure as I'm standing before you today...."


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## kikachuck (Nov 10, 2003)

I'm glad at least somebody mentioned Almost Famous. That movie is full of great lines...

"and you can tell Rolling Stone magazine that my last words were........... 'I'm on drugs'...."


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## Robot the Human (Aug 20, 2010)

I was going to do Joe Dirt, but there are way too many lol.

Instead, I do Ned! 






Favorite movie of all time ^


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## AliceSanKitchen (Aug 31, 2010)

Edward Scissorhands - final scene


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## Steve123 (Sep 13, 2009)

James Bond is sooooo coool.






I originally heard this in Duke Nukem 3d but the line is actually from this movie.


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## quiet0lady (Sep 29, 2009)

Ted Jones messed with the wrong melon farmers.


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## Emptyheart (Sep 15, 2009)

Sry haha this isn't a one liner..but I liked to many lines in here so I had to paste the whole convo lol..my all time favorite movie EVER!

Allison Reynolds: I'll do anything sexual. I don't need a million dollars to do it either.
Claire Standish: You're lying.
Allison Reynolds: I already have. I've done just about everything there is except a few things that are illegal. I'm a nymphomaniac.
Claire Standish: Lie.
Brian Johnson: Are your parents aware of this?
Allison Reynolds: The only person I told was my shrink.
Andrew Clark: And what did he do when you told him?
Allison Reynolds: He nailed me.
Claire Standish: Very nice.
Allison Reynolds: I don't think that from a legal standpoint what he did can be construed as rape, since I paid him.
Claire Standish: He's an adult.
Allison Reynolds: Yeah, he's married too.
Claire Standish: Do you have any idea how completely gross that is?
Allison Reynolds: Well, the first few times...
Claire Standish: The first few times? You mean you did it more than once?
Allison Reynolds: Sure.
Claire Standish: Are you crazy?
Brian Johnson: Obviously she's crazy if she's screwing a shrink.
Allison Reynolds: Have you ever done it?
Claire Standish: I don't even have a psychiatrist.
Allison Reynolds: Have you ever done it with a normal person?
Claire Standish: Didn't we already cover this?
John Bender: You never answered the question.
Claire Standish: Look, I'm not going to discuss my private life with total strangers.
Allison Reynolds: It's kind of a double edged sword isn't it?
Claire Standish: A what?
Allison Reynolds: Well, if you say you haven't, you're a prude. If you say you have you're a ****. It's a trap. You want to but you can't, and when you do you wish you didn't, right?
Claire Standish: Wrong.
Allison Reynolds: Or are you a tease?
Andrew Clark: She's a tease.
Claire Standish: I'm sure. Why don't you just forget it.
Andrew Clark: Oh, you're a tease and you know it. All girls are teases.
John Bender: She's only a tease if what she does gets you hot.
Claire Standish: I don't do anything.
Allison Reynolds: That's why you're a tease.
Claire Standish: OK, let me ask you a few questions.
Allison Reynolds: I already told you everything.
Claire Standish: No. Doesn't it bother you to sleep around without being in love. I mean, don't you want any respect?
Allison Reynolds: I don't screw to get respect. That's the difference between you and me.
Claire Standish: It's not the only difference I hope.
John Bender: Face it, you're a tease.
Claire Standish: I'm NOT a tease.
John Bender: Sure you are. Sex is your weapon. You said it yourself. You use it to get respect.
Claire Standish: No, I never said that she twisted my words around.
John Bender: What do you use it for then?
Claire Standish: I don't use it period.
John Bender: Oh, are you medically frigid or is it psychological?
Claire Standish: I didn't mean it that way. You guys are putting words into my mouth.
John Bender: Well, if you'd just answer the question.
Brian Johnson: Why don't you just answer the question?
Andrew Clark: Be honest.
John Bender: No big deal.
Brian Johnson: Yeah answer it.
Andrew Clark: Answer the question, Claire.
John Bender: Talk to us. Every one: C'mon, answer the question. Come on. Answer it.
John Bender: C'mon, it's easy. It's only one question.
Claire Standish: NO I NEVER DID IT.
Allison Reynolds: I never did it either. I'm not a nymphomaniac. I'm a compulsive liar.


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## Madbritt (Nov 12, 2008)

"I'm a lead farmer, motherf***er!"
-From Tropic Thunder

and

"Nobody tells DJ request what to play. Let them tell you what to play, they lose respect for you. They lose respect for you, you lose control. Not today."
-The Goods


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## Belshazzar (Apr 12, 2010)

"If I'd known we were gonna cast our feelings into words, I'd've memorized the Song of Solomon." -Tom Reagan, Miller's Crossing


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## Joel (Mar 4, 2009)




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## Manic Monkey (Sep 6, 2010)

*Melinda Sordino: *"My English teacher has no face. I call her Hairwoman."


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## JayDontCareEh (Jul 16, 2007)




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## ThrashtilDeath (Mar 21, 2009)

"You look like your head fell in the cheese dip back in 1957"


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## Pocketfox (Jul 3, 2009)

"I'm not sorry, and I'll not apologise... and I'll as soon go to Dublin as to Hell."
-- Barry Lyndon

"It must have been tough on your mother, not having any children."
-- 42nd Street

"Listen, not that I mind a slight case of abduction now and then, but I have tickets for the theater tonight, and well, I tend to get sort of unreasonable about things like that."
-- North By Northwest


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## RyeCatcher86 (Sep 14, 2010)

"Mein Fuhrer! I can walk!!!"
-- Dr. Strangelove


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## alfredd88 (Sep 29, 2010)

A man can be an artist... in anything, food, whatever. It depends on how good he is at it. Creasey's art is death. He is about to paint his masterpiece.


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