# What do "normal" people talk about?



## sadsas

I mean when you go to the mall and see people talking, what is their to even talk about?

If they talk about the stuff they did last week, I could sum it all up in less then a minute.

I don't do anything.

So let's say I started talking with someone, what the heck do I say?

Beside hi, and how are you doing.


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## Kennnie

gossiping


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## SOME

they talk about you.:um


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## Tilter

Work, school, family, friends, pets. Frustrations with the listed, satisfaction with the listed... Hmm, the weather, that new building that's going up down the road, updates on hobbies. Pretty much, basically what Kennnie said, gossip.

I don't go anywhere or do much, so I tend to talk about things online that I found interesting if nothing else, haha.


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## Spreewell

Talking to random people only makes you more strange. You should join a club like the gym, game club, get a job etc. Then you will have like-minded individuals who will know what you're talking about.


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## sadsas

SOME said:


> they talk about you.:um


No, seriously, life? If so, I certinly have nothing to say.

I like politics, I could talk about that.

No thanks to my conservative upbringing, I don't know anything about music. Same for movies. We don't have cable.

Cooking: absolutely not.

Space/technology: yes.

Let's see here, I can talk about:
*Politics, space travel, technology.*

No one else knows much, or even cares about these things.


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## Resonance

When people talk to each other, they tend to talk about shared experiences, or people they all know.

They also exchange anecdotes.


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## sadsas

> They also exchange anecdotes.


Hmmmm good idea, how about how miserable my life is?


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## Spreewell

The art of talking is stupid because of manners. You can't just go up to somebody and say something random. It's annoying to me with the "How are you" "I'm good, how are you" "I'm good". Wow what a waste of time!


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## wheels00

Yeah, it's a good question. I think that good conversations (not just small talk) usually have some purpose behind them even if that purpose is not explicit. For example, some might recount some news with the hope that the other person will give them some advice, or empathise, or explain something they don't understand. Or someone might talk about future plans to see if the other person might ask if they can be involved. 

So maybe for us SA people, we should try to think of conversation topics by asking ourselves:

What would I like advice on?
What would I like some empathy/sympathy for?
What would I like to learn about?
What would I like other people to be involved in?

In contrast, I think my SA tends to lead me to think:

What is a safe topic to talk about?
What does the other person want to talk about?
What topic will make me seem normal?



So, if I had to answer those first four questions myself:

- I'd like advice on dealing with SA, dating, finishing my thesis, how to get a passport, finding a good career.
- I'd like empathy/sympathy about dealing with SA, dating, finishing my thesis, and finding a good career.
- I'd like to learn about what other people like and dislike about their jobs, how people my age meet friends and prospective girlfriends/boyfriends
- I'd like to have someone to go to careers information sessions with


Now, some of that kind of feels too personal. But if someone asked me what i've been up to, I guess I could say "Oh, just been trying to finish my thesis and researching careers" and maybe, hopefully, that would lead to a conversation that actually interested me.

I don't know. I think that's kind of what non-SAers do.


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## Fantas Eyes

Me and a friend were talking about dreams the other day.


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## Basket

goooooooooossssssssssssipppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp cuz they have no life. Stereotypically speaking I mean.

Anything if you want the entire pop. It's very diverse.


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## CeilingStarer

Annoying bull**** generally.


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## sadsas

polkadotlaughter said:


> Me and a friend were talking about dreams the other day.


You have a friend? No fair!


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## NumeroUno

Yea it's usually just gossip in general conversation. *****ing about people at work, what they've done or what someone else hasn't done. It's amazing how I can see two people appearing quite happy small talking together, then catch one of them on their own who allegedly ''hates'' that person lol.

I always sit there and think ''why the f are you telling me this'' whenever people try small talk with me. Pretty negative view I know but don't people think how pointless and boring stuff sounds before they say it? Guess not, thats why they don't have any SA lol.


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## Scrub-Zero

**** i don't care about usually. But yeah. Gossiping is a major conversation topic among normies.


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## brokensaint

American Idol.


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## metallica2147

I don't know! haha. I always think about what they say. But then again they have lives so they must just talk about what they're up to. When ever I'm in a conversation I run out of things to say (not that I converse very often).


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## LALoner

Most conversations are unbearable to listen to if your not part of them. The main point of conversing is just to feel connected to other people. If you eavesdrop on strangers 99% of the time its so boring you feel like your head is gonna explode.

Just stop worrying about being interesting and just try to connect with people. Your not auditioning to be a stand up comic. Your just shooting the breeze.


^ my two cents.


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## InMyDreams55

Everything. Life. Music. That hot girl getting voted off American Idol when it should have been Stefano. Err...i mean it's not like i watch AI....or anything. :um *cough* :um

LOLZ @ "normal people". I just see them as people. I ain't no different from them. But that is a funny way way to refer to _them_. :yes


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## ambergris

From my observations I would guess that 50% of 'normal' conversation consists of b1tching about other people. After that, a guy will usually discuss whatever it is he happens to be a geek about (sport, film, gaming, politics, porn etc.), but if you are a woman it is probably going to be more b1tching.


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## Makaveli

BPA free said:


> that's what it boils down to basically.
> but here's what people at my job usually talk about on breaks:
> 
> -celebrities
> -TV shows
> -sports
> -gossip/workplace/school drama
> -drinking/partying
> -girls/boys
> -other inane crap that no one really cares about but just talk about for the sake of conversation
> 
> occasionally there's the odd intelligent conversation
> 
> hah, that made me sound like a pretentious *** but I stand by it :yes


pretty much what you wrote, but some people just chatter about mindless bull**** whereas I try to talk about stuff that has some
meaning. Even if it's about sport i try to talk proper ****.


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## mkp1974

First of all, just walk up to a person and smile. If you don't feel like smiling, it's cool. Just fake it. Act dumb and talk about the weather. These things are essential. If you run out of stuff to say, just keep the smiling , dumb routine going. If you are like me, you will figure out that there are about 1 in 200 people that you will want to talk to again - probably people you want to have sex with. If you do it enough, you will learn how to discard the people you hate early, and keep the convo. going with the folks you hope to bang. Hope I sound like I know what I am talking about - but I really don't. I have no idea.


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## Wacky Wednesdays

I'm awful at small talk, I always feel like avoiding silences so I end up discussing the weather, talking too fast and asking people how their week's been when honestly, I really couldn't care less :O 

With good friends, it's more specific because you know them and actually care more for them than for some random person's cousin from uni that you met once at a party.


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## shynesshellasucks

All I basically talk about is cars, girls, sports, and video games. Other than that I ask people about themselves and the conversation dies after that. I think it is important having knowledge on various topics that you could talk about. The huge advantage that an average person has over an SAer is that they have a life that they could about, while the SAer has very little to none which makes it very hard.


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## sarafinanickelbocker

sadsas said:


> I mean when you go to the mall and see people talking, what is their to even talk about?
> 
> If they talk about the stuff they did last week, I could sum it all up in less then a minute.
> 
> I don't do anything.
> 
> So let's say I started talking with someone, what the heck do I say?
> 
> Beside hi, and how are you doing.


I'm not positive on male people. I would guess they talk a lot about sports, because that is what I hear when they talk to eachother...or about this woman or that. I suspect that is sexist though. A lot talk about their life. I'm told people like to talk about themselves, so to engage them about themselves. Relationships and complaints about those relationships come up a lot. Are you talking small talk? Hi, how are you? So what do you do? Oh yeah? I do (blank). Mmm hmm. Just be interested in that person. Try not to give them the third degree like I do.


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## sadsas

> I'm not positive on male people.


I always figured boys and girls talked about the same stuff, it is the same planet, right? We see the same stuff after all.



> I would guess they talk a lot about sports, because that is what I hear when they talk to eachother...


I hate sports. Every darn one of them. 



> or about this woman or that. I suspect that is sexist though.


Yes, I would say so. I have no interest in talking about other people because they are "hot" or whatever.



> Try not to give them the third degree like I do.


Okay.


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## sadsas

@everybody else

Talking about random bull$h!t sure looks fun right about now, considering the last time I ever talked to anybody else was about 8 months ago.


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## FishSticks

Teeth.
Virtually every conversation I have involves teeth.


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## September Skies

Pie.


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## trendyfool

Spreewell said:


> Talking to random people only makes you more strange. You should join a club like the gym, game club, get a job etc. Then you will have like-minded individuals who will know what you're talking about.


I disagree. Talking to random strangers (in a non-creepy way, which is possible) only makes you more awesome. I've made at least two new friends on the bus.


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## Monroee

InMyDreams55 said:


> Everything. Life. Music. That hot girl getting voted off American Idol when it should have been Stefano. Err...i mean it's not like i watch AI....or anything. :um *cough* :um


Dude, that was sooo rigged!


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## Grapefruits

Well, I am not normal. From my observations, normal people talk about their boyfriend or girlfriend, Facebook, gossip, rumors, reality shows, etc.

I am not in any sports. I am not in any clubs. I do not date nor do I have a boyfriend. I do not hang out with people outside of school. In fact, I don't even really hang out with people in school either. I occasionally eat lunch with a friend or two, but that's rare. 

I am a total loner. And it doesn't bother me too much.


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## Forza Italia

Random stupid things about their interests, plans, fun stuff,... Do you want more concrete stuff than this ?


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## ratbag

Everyone I know just gossips and complains about what they hate. I used to have friends I could talk about anything with, but all they do now is smoke weed all the time and get pissed at people.


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## michaelmyers

When I talk to people it's about work, other people and TV shows. Or sports with other guys.


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## chet31

A group of friends at the mall are probably talking about what they just saw in a store, who they just saw, what they are going to eat, what they are going to do that night. Any of those topics can lead in a thousand directions. That is why they are friends, this stuff comes easily to them. They also have history to draw on. 

Making small talk w/ someone you haven't seen in a while, or w/ a business associate is a different matter. It is not easy, even if you do not have SA. My "stock" topics are sports, weather, celebrities, what I am doing right now why did I run into you, etc. And you hope the other party pitches in w/ some topics.


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## DreamyDove

Sometimes observations of immediate surroundings....? And perhaps humorous or associative comments on such things....?


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## EKC1224

It seems some normal people can talk about anything BS and others are in-tuned to it. Even if it sounds like mindless chit chats to me.


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## trendyfool

normal people talk about life, pretty much everything really.


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## farfegnugen

Talk about girls, sports, and what is wrong with the person currently not in the room seems to encompass most casual conversation with about 90% of people.


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## RenegadeReloaded

The last group of semi-friends I had talked about going out, getting drunk as sh*t like that was a cool thing, they all bragged how many shots they took, and how they could have taken even more, but then they met a girl withc whom they danced a bit with, talked for some tens of minutes, exchanged phone calls, then began bragging about how the girl called them after a few hours telling him to meet, but she was such a loser and didnd't fitted his high standards............this kind of crap was a stereotype in the group, so called values.

So most disscusion went from girls to drinking to partying to how they copied on the exams and how they tricked the teacher, how much fun they had of the teacher by mocking it in the face (that was seen as a cool thing).

Then they started gossiping about other friends of theirs. Or if not gossip, just passing on some stories they heard from other friends.


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## dollparts

Its good to keep informed of current events - in your city and the rest of the world. Read the newspaper, watch the news, listen to the radio. 

"Hey can you believe the earthquake that happened in Japan. Its devastating ..." This would open a window for conversation and expressing thoughts etc. 

Ask questions that can't be answered with a closed response like yes and no. 

People love to talk about themselves...
Give the person a compliment.. Hey those are nice ---

People talk about lots of stuff-- television, music, fashion, celebrity gossip, problems in their lives, people, travel, their family, their weekend, their job, their pets, the news, politics, the weather, their ideas, dreams, goals, food, the internet, newest technology, sports, relationships... Anything.


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## UltraShy

sadsas said:


> I like politics, I could talk about that.


I could talk about political/social issues extensively as well. Just look at my massive collection of posts on Society & Culture of proof of how I simply can't shut up on that subject.

Unfortunately, politics is a very divisive issue. Might not help in making friends if you express the view that their world view is just plain stupid. Does help one bond with those who share the same views though.


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## Wacky Wednesdays

Grapefruits said:


> Well, I am not normal. From my observations, normal people talk about their boyfriend or girlfriend, Facebook, gossip, rumors, reality shows, etc.
> 
> I am not in any sports. I am not in any clubs. I do not date nor do I have a boyfriend. I do not hang out with people outside of school. In fact, I don't even really hang out with people in school either. I occasionally eat lunch with a friend or two, but that's rare.
> 
> I am a total loner. And it doesn't bother me too much.


Omg this is not acceptable! How can it not bother you, make friends! :no
lol I'm sure it's not so bad hanging out with a person or two


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## kunak

Wacky Wednesdays said:


> Omg this is not acceptable! How can it not bother you, make friends! :no
> lol I'm sure it's not so bad hanging out with a person or two


let me guess you dont have SA? The majority of people are here because of reasons like this myself included. Usually my isolation doesn't bother me because I have a harder time being around people because of SA.


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## iggytsarlust

LALoner said:


> Most conversations are unbearable to listen to if your not part of them. The main point of conversing is just to feel connected to other people. If you eavesdrop on strangers 99% of the time its so boring you feel like your head is gonna explode.


My thoughts exactly! I find it painful to listen to strangers' conversations because they seem so pointless and meaningless, and if I'm on public transportation I have to put my headphones on if I'm around people having a conversation. I honestly think most people talk to hear the sound of their own voice.

Even worse is listening to someone talk on their cell phone, I always imagine that there's no one on the other side and they're doing a bad job of pretending to be on the phone because they are saying absolutely nothing that could be of benefit to the other person..


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## sadsas

> I find it painful to listen to strangers' conversations because they seem so pointless and meaningless,


But _they_ seem to enjoy it, so there must be some merit to it.


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## Caswell

About something that concerns you and others. Thats why it is so convient to talk about weather. Weather matters everyone. 
This is though mostly regarding small talk.


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## iggytsarlust

sadsas said:


> But _they_ seem to enjoy it, so there must be some merit to it.


There may be merit to it for them, but that doesn't necessarily mean it would benefit you. Some people naturally love to talk about anything and everything, and others don't. Some people crave constant interaction and stimulation and others don't.


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## IcemanKilmer

My group of friends talked about either themselves, or other people they know most of the time. You know, stuff like "I did this today, so and so is having a party, last night was so funny." So pretty much if you don't like talking about yourself or other people, conversing with people is pretty tough.


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## chet31

EKC1224 said:


> It seems some normal people can talk about anything BS and others are in-tuned to it. Even if it sounds like mindless chit chats to me.


I would say that this is true among a group of friends, but non-SA people are quite capable of having awkward and uncomfortable conversations.


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## MrSoloDolo123

whenever i talk to new people the topics that usually come up are:

Occupation
Hobbies
Alcohol/clubs
Sports

Seriously, i dont think ive ever had a full random convo with someone 18-22 who hasnt brought up one or more of those topics.


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## IsThereAComputerOption

I haven't spoken to someone in so long I forgot what I talk about...

Normal people talk about trivial small talk that I don't care about - I normally try and talk about serious things, like the state of politics or funny things like my favourite comedians.


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## Anemone

The other day in the playground at my sons school I heard two mums talking. One of them looked like she didn't really have time or care what the other was saying. The conversation was about pregnancy. 

One of them said "I just knew I was having a boy, even before I went to my scan, I just knew" 

I thought to myself....er.....no you didn't know that. Maybe you guessed, and had a 50/50 chance of being right....

Why the helll are people so fake? Why make out you're some kind of psychic or something? If she had said that to me I would probably have burst out laughing right in her face or something. Or I would if I didn't have SA anyway.... I do not want to talk to these people. Their conversations bore the tits off of me


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## Anemone

I mean are they so bored that they have to make things up to tlk about now?


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## sadsas

*End conclusion:*
Talk about whatever goes.

Sounds good!


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## JayC123

Normal people talk either about football or sex...


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## chet31

Anemone said:


> The other day in the playground at my sons school I heard two mums talking. One of them looked like she didn't really have time or care what the other was saying. The conversation was about pregnancy.
> 
> One of them said "I just knew I was having a boy, even before I went to my scan, I just knew"
> 
> I thought to myself....er.....no you didn't know that. Maybe you guessed, and had a 50/50 chance of being right....
> 
> Why the helll are people so fake? Why make out you're some kind of psychic or something? If she had said that to me I would probably have burst out laughing right in her face or something. Or I would if I didn't have SA anyway.... I do not want to talk to these people. Their conversations bore the tits off of me


Exactly. If I had been talking w/ this woman, I would have been bored to tears. I do not have SA, but have had mild pangs of it. Part of what "cured" me was listening to other people converse and realizing I could not do much worse myself.


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## spacebound_rocketship

At my last high school I was in the "popular girls group" (my half cousin was a part of it)
They talked about sex, gossip, boys, getting drunk/stoned, what they did on the weekend, parties, girls they hate, music, makeup/hair etc.

This one girl was going into detail about how her and her boyfriend 'do it' like 5 times a day and she was talking about her favorite positions...I used to think she was pretty but now she just looks like a tramp to me.

It was so boring.


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## Asiul

sadsas said:


> Hmmmm good idea, how about how miserable my life is?


Yeah a lot of conversations are just people complaining about their 'miserable lives' so if you want to talk to people you know that's one way to start a conversation. However I warn you, those tend not to be interesting conversations. It's only if you'er complaining about an issue you'er very passionate about, to people that are passionate about that too, that it could turn into an interesting discussion.

Ex.
'The weather sucks'
'yeah'
*conversation over:teeth*

'I can't believe [insert political leader name] did [insert what they did wrong]'
'Yeah I know that so horrible! It's just like what [insert another leader] did...

*very interesting discussion follows*:yay
ps. be careful with this one it could lead you into a very indignant argument


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