# Goal: Go into Victoria's Secret tomorrow and walk around



## iwillbeatanxiety (Jun 15, 2012)

I am a guy and I will try to do this tomorrow. Hopefully I remember and can do it! I will update you guys.


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

lmfao, whenever I'm in VS, and there's a guy there, I always assume they're a bit pervy, or just not totally discreet about why they are there in the first place. 

hmmmmmmm


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## iwillbeatanxiety (Jun 15, 2012)

ok maybe i'm not going to do it - you mean you don't see boyfriends and husbands ever there?


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## Whatev (Feb 6, 2012)

calichick said:


> lmfao, whenever I'm in VS, and there's a guy there, I always assume they're a bit pervy, or just not totally discreet about why they are there in the first place.
> 
> hmmmmmmm


This.

Just wondering why Victoria's Secret of all places?


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## gilmourr (Nov 17, 2011)

Dude, your anxiety isn't going to get better from you walking around in victoria secret. No guy would do that unless he's with his girlfriend. If anything go do something that you would normally do or practice something that at least has some relevance in your life.


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

iwillbeatanxiety said:


> ok maybe i'm not going to do it - you mean you don't see boyfriends and husbands ever there?


I do all the time, it doesn't change my opinion of them lol

But I can understand with all that silk and lace and bras and panties....it's like moths to a flame..

They want to discover Victoria's secret, who can blame them ?


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## coeur_brise (Oct 7, 2004)

I was planning to do this, seriously, but I'm a girl so it's somehow more normal... Was also planning to walk into a car place to get an estimate on my damaged car.. which would be the girl equivalent to this. But yeah, guy walking around in bra and panties store? Kinda awkward, unless of course he's with his girlfriend.


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## Wilbur (Jun 13, 2012)

OP, I like your idea and think it's a great shame-attacking exercise. I disagree with the other posters in that the whole point is you're bringing on possible judgments from the store patrons or staff as a male shopper in a women's store, only to come out on the other side just fine. Sure, it may be a bit embarassing, but so what?! If you're anything like me, you stick way too close to what's socially acceptable behavior (not to be confused with legality), and this is a good challenge to that IMO.


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## iwillbeatanxiety (Jun 15, 2012)

I might do this, not sure yet, will see how the day goes. I will go into Whole Foods, though, and walk around and buy nothing. I won't even grab a cart. This Whole Foods is really crowded so should be good.


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## jgentle (May 23, 2012)

even better go in and dress in the lingerie


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## lad (Sep 26, 2011)

calichick said:


> lmfao, whenever I'm in VS, and there's a guy there, I always assume they're a bit pervy, or just not totally discreet about why they are there in the first place.
> 
> hmmmmmmm


Why? I don't see what's pervy about a guy in a lingerie shop.


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

lad said:


> Why? I don't see what's pervy about a guy in a lingerie shop.


you don't see what's pervy about a guy just walking around a lingerie shop? What's he looking for? Free handouts? :teeth Keep in mind, just walking aimlessly through VS....Alone...

I am just warning him that when a massive amount of girls see one guy walking around in a female undergarment store, they might think something of him. But it's alright, because I see OP wants to get over this fear.

Anyways, VS caters to a young demographic, most of the guys in there are there for the eye candy, even if with a girlfriend.



jgentle said:


> even better go in and dress in the lingerie


I'd like to see that. I've never seen a cross dresser in VS before !


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## Wilbur (Jun 13, 2012)

iwillbeatanxiety said:


> I might do this, not sure yet, will see how the day goes. I will go into Whole Foods, though, and walk around and buy nothing. I won't even grab a cart. This Whole Foods is really crowded so should be good.


I recommend trying to stay in the store until you feel you've passed the peak of your anxiety and it's even lower than when you were preparing to go or just entering the store. That's been the most helpful in my experience, but of course I'm just one example. Are you working on a specific system or anxiety-attacking plan, or just thinking of exercises on the spot? Either way, you'll do great.


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## FireIsTheCleanser (Aug 16, 2011)

Don't guys ever buy something for their girlfriends or wives from those stores? I don't think it would be that weird to see a guy walking around by himself.


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

Might as well mess with the sales people while you're there. Ask if they think a certain bra would fit you OK...or ask them which color panties would best match your shirt.


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## lad (Sep 26, 2011)

calichick said:


> you don't see what's pervy about a guy just walking around a lingerie shop? What's he looking for? Free handouts? :teeth Keep in mind, just walking aimlessly through VS....Alone...
> 
> I am just warning him that when a massive amount of girls see one guy walking around in a female undergarment store, they might think something of him. But it's alright, because I see OP wants to get over this fear.
> 
> ...


What if the guy was a cross dresser or was buying lingerie for his gf or even was buying a toy for himself? It's not wierd is it?


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

lad said:


> What if the guy was a cross dresser


Is he doing this?


> or was buying lingerie for his gf


Is he doing this?



> or even was buying a toy for himself? It's not wierd is it?


and wtf, I don't even know how to respond to this one..FYI, VS is not a sex toy shop, the only "toys" it sells are 5 inch pink poodle stuffed animals. LOL

But hey I changed my mind, I really wonder how many of you SA guys could last in VS during peak hours on a Saturday afternoon for more than 5 or 10 minutes.....you should all try for the fun of it.. VS is one of the most crowded stores for females, it's always jam packed with girls, even for me, I hate being there because of the incredible lines and close proximity to other people....


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## lad (Sep 26, 2011)

calichick said:


> Is he doing this?
> 
> Is he doing this?
> 
> ...


You were talking about guys in general, you said you assume the guys you see in victorias are pervy. I know it's not a sex toy shop but some lingerie stores sell toys too.  I don't know what the 'is he doing this?' comments are about, you need to chill out.


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## Zeeshan (Sep 4, 2011)

"I am just warning him that when a massive amount of girls see one guy walking around in a female undergarment store, they might think something of him"

so.....let them think what they want.


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

lad said:


> You were talking about guys in general, you said you assume the guys you see in victorias are pervy. I know it's not a sex toy shop but some lingerie stores sell toys too.  I don't know what the 'is he doing this?' comments are about, you need to chill out.







:roll


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## iwillbeatanxiety (Jun 15, 2012)

Wilbur said:


> I recommend trying to stay in the store until you feel you've passed the peak of your anxiety and it's even lower than when you were preparing to go or just entering the store. That's been the most helpful in my experience, but of course I'm just one example. Are you working on a specific system or anxiety-attacking plan, or just thinking of exercises on the spot? Either way, you'll do great.


Hey so I didn't do it. This was actually just something I thought up on my own so I didn't make it a priority. My main program is focused on talking to strangers. I talked to almost 20 girls today. It's all structured so these are very short interactions that slowly increase in difficulty.


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## TryingMara (Mar 25, 2012)

Will you be buying a gift? If I saw a guy there, I'd just assume he was buying a gift for his significant other. Honestly, most of the guys look uncomfortable, with or without their SOs, so I wouldn't assume anyone's a perv. Part of overcoming SA is trying to train yourself to not give a **** what anyone else is thinking, anyway. Good luck, let us know how it goes.


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## TryingMara (Mar 25, 2012)

iwillbeatanxiety said:


> Hey so I didn't do it. This was actually just something I thought up on my own so I didn't make it a priority. My main program is focused on talking to strangers. I talked to almost 20 girls today. It's all structured so these are very short interactions that slowly increase in difficulty.


20....nice job


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## ryobi (Jan 13, 2009)

good luck and why?


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## Wilbur (Jun 13, 2012)

iwillbeatanxiety said:


> Hey so I didn't do it. This was actually just something I thought up on my own so I didn't make it a priority. My main program is focused on talking to strangers. I talked to almost 20 girls today. It's all structured so these are very short interactions that slowly increase in difficulty.


Impressive man, keep it up!


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## Gunter (Aug 24, 2011)

> I do all the time, it doesn't change my opinion of them lol
> 
> But I can understand with all that silk and lace and bras and panties....it's like moths to a flame..
> 
> They want to discover Victoria's secret, who can blame them ?












What is this secret :l


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

calichick said:


> But hey I changed my mind, I really wonder how many of you SA guys could last in VS during peak hours on a Saturday afternoon for more than 5 or 10 minutes.....you should all try for the fun of it.. VS is one of the most crowded stores for females, it's always jam packed with girls, even for me, I hate being there because of the incredible lines and close proximity to other people....


:haha YES!!! SAS guys should totally do this. It will be a challenge. The _Victoria's Secret Challenge for Men_. Whomever can wander around a VS store at peek hours for the longest time wins! Make sure to record your time and write a vivid account of every agonizing observation, occurrence, and thought. Aaaaaaaand...GO!!!


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

Secretly Pretentious said:


> :haha YES!!! SAS guys should totally do this. It will be a challenge. The _Victoria's Secret Challenge for Men_. Whomever can wander around a VS store at peek hours for the longest time wins! Make sure to record your time and write a vivid account of every agonizing observation, occurrence, and thought. Aaaaaaaand...GO!!!


I think I do a good enough job coming off as weird and awkward without wandering around a Victoria Secrets store :um I wonder what the equivalent challenge for women would be? :con I can only imagine the log entries I'd end up with though...

_Entry #1: Attempted small talk with a woman browsing for bras but she ran away. How odd.
Entry #2: Unable to find any comfortable sports bras in my color that comfortably fit my moobs. Oh well, maybe next time.
..._


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

Secretly Pretentious said:


> :haha YES!!! SAS guys should totally do this. It will be a challenge. The _Victoria's Secret Challenge for Men_. Whomever can wander around a VS store at peek hours for the longest time wins! Make sure to record your time and write a vivid account of every agonizing observation, occurrence, and thought. Aaaaaaaand...GO!!!


I know I was thinking that would actually be a good idea to see who can last the longest but some people live in dead cities..

I would totally do the female equivalent version but I can't think of any place exclusively male?? Maybe some gym? I'm so afraid of gyms :lol That's why I work out outside!



huh said:


> I think I do a good enough job coming off as weird and awkward without wandering around a Victoria Secrets store


Yes then again, it wouldn't be such a good idea to have some awkward male lurking in VS, might give the people there the wrong impression..


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

calichick said:


> I know I was thinking that would actually be a good idea to see who can last the longest but some people live in dead cities..
> 
> I would totally do the female equivalent version but I can't think of any place exclusively male?? Maybe some gym? I'm so afraid of gyms :lol That's why I work out outside!


It's a lot harder to find a female equivalent because there's much more stigma for a man to be in a woman's domain than a woman being in a man's domain. The only two places I can think of is a strip club and men's locker room. (Might get kicked out of that last one before we retreat though.)


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## sansd (Mar 22, 2006)

TryingMara said:


> Will you be buying a gift? If I saw a guy there, I'd just assume he was buying a gift for his significant other.


Same, unless I saw a reason to suspect otherwise.

I've only gone into a VS store once. I was pretty uncomfortable being there, even though I'm female.


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

carambola said:


> I've only gone into a VS store once. I was pretty uncomfortable being there, even though I'm female.


I honestly feel too intimidated to walk into a VS store at all. Somehow, I got it in my head that I'm not pretty enough to have any business in there. Rationally I know that it's ridiculous. There's no bouncer at the door turning away unattractive women. A paying customer is a paying customer. But Social Anxiety makes you think some pretty weird stuff.


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## elvin jones (Dec 12, 2011)

You should go to Frederick's instead. I've noticed that hotter women shop there versus VS.


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## BobtheBest (Aug 27, 2011)

elvin jones said:


> You should go to Frederick's instead. I've noticed that hotter women shop there versus VS.


I've noticed that lol.


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## Fima (Mar 17, 2012)

Hey buddy, I just saw that some people discaurage you, but I don't see this as a bad idea, everyone have diffrent ways to handle theire social anxiety, if you feel that this would help, go and do it, for me, something as stupid as playing horror games, helps with my SA(since I am having problem co-oping with fear) so just do it, I support you, and I don't see you as a pervert, damn, even Christians are more perverts then you are...


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

elvin jones said:


> You should go to Frederick's instead. I've noticed that hotter women shop there versus VS.


I've never heard of Frederick's, but I'll be sure to steer clear of it for the sake of my self esteem. Thanks for the tip. :lol


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## KramersHalfSister (May 3, 2012)

Secretly Pretentious said:


> It's a lot harder to find a female equivalent because there's much more stigma for a man to be in a woman's domain than a woman being in a man's domain. The only two places I can think of is a strip club and men's locker room. (Might get kicked out of that last one before we retreat though.)


The female equivalent for me would be an automotive parts store. I feel like all of their eyes are ogling me :afr I remember the last time I went to Napa Auto Parts to buy a thermostat for my car. There were 3 guys talking outside right by the door and they stared at me from the minute I got out of my car until I got in the store. It was ten times worse inside. I felt VERY uncomfortable the whole time and kind of pissed off at all the staring. Kudos to the OP for even considering voluntarily going into the lair of the oopposite sex. I stepped into the lion's den and couldn't get out fast enough.


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## calichick (Jul 30, 2010)

Secretly Pretentious said:


> It's a lot harder to find a female equivalent because there's much more stigma for a man to be in a woman's domain than a woman being in a man's domain. The only two places I can think of is a strip club and men's locker room. (Might get kicked out of that last one before we retreat though.)


I'm still going with the gym, I have only been inside a real gym once, it was inside the UCLA campus, all I can remember is insanely gorgeous men...all that sweat and muscles and testosterone high zone....

*faints :lol


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## Iota (Mar 24, 2010)

I'm a woman and walking into VC makes me uncomfortable, too... I've been there before and it felt kind of lame. Expensive. Pressure to buy expensive underwear. Perky salesgirls. Bright lights and bad music. But really, the stuff there wasn't nearly as awesome as I was led to believe by media/sales... Not to mention, a lot of girls find it fashionable to walk around everywhere with those cute shopping bags. I will always find that weird.

Anyway, if going into VC is your goal good luck. It sounds like torture to me, but ok. You can do it. I hope you have something in mind to buy (even if you're not), because browsing is sometimes viewed as creepy, especially by other women...... But such is life.



KramersHalfSister said:


> The female equivalent for me would be an automotive parts store. I feel like all of their eyes are ogling me :afr I remember the last time I went to Napa Auto Parts to buy a thermostat for my car. There were 3 guys talking outside right by the door and they stared at me from the minute I got out of my car until I got in the store. It was ten times worse inside. I felt VERY uncomfortable the whole time and kind of pissed off at all the staring. Kudos to the OP for even considering voluntarily going into the lair of the oopposite sex. I stepped into the lion's den and couldn't get out fast enough.


Lol. Good comparison!


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## elvin jones (Dec 12, 2011)

Secretly Pretentious said:


> I've never heard of Frederick's, but I'll be sure to steer clear of it for the sake of my self esteem. Thanks for the tip. :lol


Even when you go with a girlfriend it can be awkward. I do the ole pretend to text on my phone trick. Especially when you are holding onto underwear for the person you are with and they disappear. So you are a guy, all by himself, in a lingerie store with a fist full of panties looking awkward. :blush


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## imskyhiii (Apr 8, 2015)

i know this is bad but whenever i see a guy in VS and he is really cute or hot, i think he is shopping for his girlfriend or something lol


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## Farideh (Nov 13, 2011)

You should at least buy something for your mom. A body spray or lotion.


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

I've been in one with my mom a few times, never alone. I couldn't survive alone. Come to think of it, I did get a lot of looks :um.


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## mike91 (Sep 23, 2012)

coeur_brise said:


> I was planning to do this, seriously, but I'm a girl so it's somehow more normal... Was also planning to walk into a car place to get an estimate on my damaged car.. which would be the girl equivalent to this. But yeah, guy walking around in bra and panties store? Kinda awkward, unless of course he's with his girlfriend.


No going to get your car damage valued is not seen as strange my sister has been and got her car quoted alot noth werid or creepy about it


Wilbur said:


> OP, I like your idea and think it's a great shame-attacking exercise. I disagree with the other posters in that the whole point is you're bringing on possible judgments from the store patrons or staff as a male shopper in a women's store, only to come out on the other side just fine. Sure, it may be a bit embarassing, but so what?! If you're anything like me, you stick way too close to what's socially acceptable behavior (not to be confused with legality), and this is a good challenge to that IMO.


Tbh i think it stupid idea if it was to go to the shops to buy a pair of jeans for himself few enough but to walk around female underwear shop by him self not even guys with out anxiety would do this


iwillbeatanxiety said:


> I might do this, not sure yet, will see how the day goes. I will go into Whole Foods, though, and walk around and buy nothing. I won't even grab a cart. This Whole Foods is really crowded so should be good.


Yep better off going to whole foods and even buy 1 item and walk out


KramersHalfSister said:


> The female equivalent for me would be an automotive parts store. I feel like all of their eyes are ogling me :afr I remember the last time I went to Napa Auto Parts to buy a thermostat for my car. There were 3 guys talking outside right by the door and they stared at me from the minute I got out of my car until I got in the store. It was ten times worse inside. I felt VERY uncomfortable the whole time and kind of pissed off at all the staring. Kudos to the OP for even considering voluntarily going into the lair of the oopposite sex. I stepped into the lion's den and couldn't get out fast enough.


Nope if anything guys would of seen you as hot wow this girl is in to cars that cool








Now guys walking through a girls underwear shop is seen as creepy and as said in before posts a perv


Farideh said:


> You should at least buy something for your mom. A body spray or lotion.


O god hi mum i went to vs today and got you this my mum would look at me strange


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## mike285 (Aug 21, 2010)

I've been in Victoria's Secret, but not really alone. I've never noticed anyone giving me weird looks or anything. If I had a girlfriend and a reason to go in alone - like I was buying her something, then I wouldn't think going there would be a big deal. If you get weird looks, it's probably because of your body language or maybe you look super nervous and you're drawing attention to yourself. Just relax...and buy whatever floats your boat lol.


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## naptime (Aug 20, 2015)

I've been in Victoria's Secret plenty of times with whoever was my girlfriend at the time. I've also gone alone once or twice to get a gift card. I don't recall getting any creepy looks from anyone..


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## prettypony (Sep 13, 2012)

Whenever I go into VS, I always see at least one guy in there. I never really thought too much of it.


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