# Do you think our lives would be easier if we were religious?



## andy0128

It strikes me that one of our problems is the hopelessness that arises from feeling rejected by society, whereas religious people still have their faith to fall back on. Do we need a crutch or something else to distract us from those feelings of inadequacy and not fitting in?


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## Tetragammon

For me personally, no. My life would be much worse if I were still religious, if I were still living at all; there's a high probability that I would have killed myself if I had stayed in my parents' religion. I tried very hard to "fake it" throughout my teens and early 20's, because I didn't want to disappoint my parents and because I wanted to "fit in."

Belief in God was actually detrimental to me. I felt like I must have been "predestined" for Hell because I absolutely hated going to church and doing anything church-related, no matter how much I tried to force myself to like it. I also couldn't stop my logic-driven brain from picking out the many fallacies and inconsistencies throughout the Bible and other church teachings, and I couldn't just "let it go" like my leaders often urged when I told them. To make matters worse, I didn't pray like everyone else does; I never asked for stupid, mundane things like finding car keys or doing well on a test in school that would eventually come true out of sheer coincidence; I always begged for help with other people, so I could find good friends and a girlfriend. But of course those prayers were never "answered" because I was unable to achieve those things on my own, so eventually I resigned myself to the notion that *God hated me, personally*, and perhaps had even "created" me in such a way that I could only ever end up in Hell.

The worst part, though, was the dishonesty and hypocrisy; I just couldn't live with myself when I had to wear the mask of a true believer every single day, and everyone thought I was someone that I was not. The crazy thing is that it had nothing to do with God or sin or anything like that; I just hated how it made me *feel* to lie to people all the time. Nothing that I did or achieved "mattered" to me because it was all done under this false persona that I had constructed to appease everyone else. It tore me up inside for a really long time. I remember sitting outside the church one morning during my senior year, waiting for the bus to school, and I got this terrible sinking feeling that I was literally less than the grains of dirt and grime at my feet, because I was so fake and worthless -- to myself as well as God.

My depression and anxiety improved significantly once I left all the religious nonsense behind me and actually started taking responsibility for my own life and my own actions. It was incredibly liberating to finally be able to tell everyone the truth, even if it made them hate or fear me. But I realized one day that another person's disappointment, fear or hatred towards me was actually _their problem_, not mine. If God is real then so be it; I accept my place in Hell willingly. But the longer I live and the more I learn, the more unlikely that possibility seems to me.


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## Neal

Speaking from personal experience, my life was more difficult when I was religious. Back then I was always feeling guilty about one thing or another. Then it made it even more difficult to relate to people. I had to turn down invitations to hang out a few times because I knew they were gonna be drinking and partying and my religion forbade doing that kinda stuff. So my social life in my early 20s consisted of older married couples from church.


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## Paul

If I had a supportive place of worship where I could make friends and develop a support system, and a religion which isn't cruel or psychotic (there are a few I like), then it would be very helpful. If not, it could be very harmful.


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## andy0128

Tetragammon said:


> For me personally, no. My life would be much worse if I were still religious, if I were still living at all; there's a high probability that I would have killed myself if I had stayed in my parents' religion. I tried very hard to "fake it" throughout my teens and early 20's, because I didn't want to disappoint my parents and because I wanted to "fit in."
> 
> .


Interesting reply. I cannot embrace religion for similar reasons to yours. Unlike you, I didn't have a religious upbringing, although there were certain elements of it in my education. Likewise i can't firmly adhere to a political party as i feel obliged to unquestionable conform to and propagate the key principles whether i agree with them entirely or not. I do wonder though what it must be like to feel contented with following a particular religion.


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## harrison

I was actually baptized at about 13. I remember my Grandma telling me that now I was responsible for my own sins. Holy crap - what a thing to tell a kid. And I hadn't even started sinning yet. 

I think it'd be great if we could just blindly believe all that stuff - although I wouldn't want one that taught me I was going to go to hell if I didn't behave. What a bunch of party poopers.

I can't remember what my religion thought was going to happen at the end of the world. It would have been just them that were going to be saved though - obviously.

Too bad for everyone else. :roll


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## A River In Norway

Absolutely. I hate being nonreligious btu I can't help what I believe. I feel judged when I do bring it up which is rarely (I live in the bible belt mind you). Also, I feel I'd be so much happier if I had a religion/god to fall back on when I am depressed which is a lot.


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## Raies

For some yes

For some no.


I like to question things so being religious would be very difficult for me.


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## smoothlinghs

I don't know why you feel you are rejected by society?


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## andy0128

smoothlinghs said:


> I don't know why you feel you are rejected by society?


We all do here. Some admittedly a lot more than others. It's not hard to work that out even if you've only been signed up a coupla hours.


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## smoothlinghs

andy0128 said:


> We all do here. Some admittedly a lot more than others. It's not hard to work that out even if you've only been signed up a coupla hours.


No, no we don't. Most of chooses to be at home instead at shool or work etc., most of chooses to be home instead going to hobbies, most of chooses to be alone instead being with people. "WE" don't like the society as it is even it would call us to join.


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## andy1984

no it would be more incoherent. not like a crutch, more like tying shoelaces together. the social aspect might be ok, but why tie your shoelaces together just so you can commiserate with other people whose shoelaces are tied together? just seems a bit silly.


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## andy0128

smoothlinghs said:


> No, no we don't. Most of chooses to be at home instead at shool or work etc., most of chooses to be home instead going to hobbies, most of chooses to be alone instead being with people. "WE" don't like the society as it is even it would call us to join.


A general dislike of human being is more in line with schizoid personality disorder. I have worked or been willing to work most of my adult life. There are others who feel less able to work, perhaps they have a support network which allows them to opt out of working and tbh there are many times where i would 've taken that option if it existed in my life. Working is unpleasant for me perhaps for others its even worse given their predicament. I tend to view those cases as victims of a society which does little to cater for anxious or quiet people. When chooses to stay home because life on the outside is unbearable then that's not really a choice at all.


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## smoothlinghs

andy0128 said:


> A general dislike of human being is more in line with schizoid personality disorder. I have worked or been willing to work most of my adult life. There are others who feel less able to work, perhaps they have a support network which allows them to opt out of working and tbh there are many times where i would 've taken that option if it existed in my life. Working is unpleasant for me perhaps for others its even worse given their predicament. I tend to view those cases as victims of a society which does little to cater for anxious or quiet people. When chooses to stay home because life on the outside is unbearable then that's not really a choice at all.


It is not schizo when people don't like things. Things does not have to be unbrearable to not choose them. Chocolate is so good, yum yum, but I don't choose it too often.


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## andy0128

smoothlinghs said:


> It is not schizo when people don't like things. Things does not have to be unbrearable to not choose them. Chocolate is so good, yum yum, but I don't choose it too often.


How do you know? Did you check the definition?

That's not the same. I deprive myself of cigarettes because they are unhealthy for example even though i enjoy them. I don't go to a party because its an ordeal more often than not. The choice is heavily influenced by the negative consequences that'll arise therefore it isn't much of a choice. A person who can't swim has a choice of throwing themselves in a lake or not. Which option will they choose? There isnt much point in talking about choices if one out of the two options completely sucks ***.


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## Mlt18

I guess for me knowing that life on earth is the only one, kind of sucks because I'm a loser that can't socialize properly or be truly accepted by humans so the thought of getting potential acceptance in afterlife was nice. I could still go to hell but at least there was some chance.


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## Welliwonder

You’re made to feel victimized by the world when you uptake religion. Everyone is an enemy/sinner when you are wearing those rose tinted glasses. You can’t accompany/socialize with sinners unless you are “witnessing” to them and letting them know they’re gonna go to a fiery filled pit unless they give themselves and 10% of their finances to an omniscient being who should be credited for every creation/event that has ever unfolded in all the time we have been here. This is at least what I was taught when going and I don’t see how that would be any better than not fitting in, **** I think I wouldn’t want to fit in if that was a way to cope with inadequacy. My advice, find something positive you can cope with. There is something for everyone regardless of what you believe. Taking initiative, no matter how small, will always lead you somewhere differently than where you are now. It’s a roll of the dice for sure with good and bad outcomes. But that is life and what makes it interesting.


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## Excaliber

harrison said:


> I can't remember what my religion thought was going to happen at the end of the world. It would have been just them that were going to be saved though - obviously.
> 
> Too bad for everyone else. :roll


Sounds like Jehovah witnesses? They have those in Australia too? I thought they believed they are of the few chosen ones saved or something. We have them come to our door every now and then and tell them to leave. They send old people or bring along a kid so you have to be polite...


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## harrison

Excaliber said:


> Sounds like Jehovah witnesses? They have those in Australia too? I thought they believed they are of the few chosen ones saved or something. We have them come to our door every now and then and tell them to leave. They send old people or bring along a kid so you have to be polite...


No, it was Seventh Day Adventist mate - although we do have Jehovah's Witness here too.


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## 0589471

Excaliber said:


> Sounds like Jehovah witnesses? They have those in Australia too? I thought they believed they are of the few chosen ones saved or something. We have them come to our door every now and then and tell them to leave. They send old people or bring along a kid so you have to be polite...


it's weird my ex was raised jehovah witness and said they don't believe in hell. So what happens to people who don't get saved then? what are the few who are saved about? confused lol


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## Excaliber

A Toxic Butterfly said:


> it's weird my ex was raised jehovah witness and said they don't believe in hell. So what happens to people who don't get saved then? what are the few who are saved about? confused lol


So they don't believe in hell but it's mentioned in the Bible... which they get there teaching from... lol? Do they have a purgatory then? I'm not entirely sure about the saved part, I just know they think they are part of this number of people who are picked out to be saved.


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## 0589471

Excaliber said:


> So they don't believe in hell but it's mentioned in the Bible... which they get there teaching from... lol? Do they have a purgatory then? I'm not entirely sure about the saved part, I just know they think they are part of this number of people who are picked out to be saved.


Yeah I don't know much about it either except that number part, and the shunning practices. Far too well.


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## WillYouStopDave

Hell no. I feel trapped as it is.


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## sad1231234

I like to pretend that god exists. Obviously very unlikely, but it brightens my life up lol. And who knows, maybe god exists. There are countless reports for after-death experiences, multiple bible predictions that came true, etc. You carve your own reality, and i like to balance mine with a little hope. **** living in some cold hard world that is destined to infinite/eternal suffering and chaos.


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## SparklingWater

I believed in God for 20 odd years. It was easier. Even if no one else, I believed this God loved me. But it's delusion imo. I've literally tried to make myself believe again to have the Christian community and the built in idea of God's love, but it hasn't worked. I'm not necessarily opposed to the idea of some being existing. Just there's nothing interested or invested in life on this planet. Human beings aren't significant in this universe besides in our own lore. Still just animals here for a fraction of time on this planet, nevermind this universe. Animals meet extinction all the time. We're not special and nothing's looking out for us.

It's hard to find meaning in this life. If God is the easier route for you and feels right, go for it. I'd go back to it if I could. Otherwise, struggle to create meaning like the rest of us do.


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## FloridaGuy48

andy0128 said:


> It strikes me that one of our problems is the hopelessness that arises from feeling rejected by society, whereas religious people still have their faith to fall back on. Do we need a crutch or something else to distract us from those feelings of inadequacy and not fitting in?[/QUOTe
> 
> Yes Religious people have it easier. They have a great story and its one everyone would like to believe is true. Who would not want to meet their loved ones again or live for eternity in heaven? We non believers simply have the truth. We know this life is it so we better make the best of it. Reality is much difficult to deal with then religious fairy tales!


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## hateliving

No. My life would still be crap. Being religious doesn't make anything better.


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## SamanthaStrange

No.


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## harrison

0589471 said:


> it's weird my ex was raised jehovah witness and said they don't believe in hell. So what happens to people who don't get saved then? what are the few who are saved about? confused lol


Glad someone resurrected this thread.

I don't think I saw this post before. Maybe that's why people used to always get Sevvies (affectionate term for Seventh Day Adventurers) mixed up with Jehovah's Witnesses. They never taught us we were going to hell either. Probably just as well under the circumstances. (thank you Jesus)

I never gave it much thought at the time - what the rest of us would be doing after all those guys went back up to heaven. I'll just be hoping Brunetti's is still there so I can at least get a decent cup of coffee.


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## love is like a dream

absolutely. this is simply why our mind evolved to believe in a higher power/ supreme being/beings in the first place.

one could live without it? of course. but
it in a way is similar to sex. people can live without it, but it's not going to be good for a peaceful/ well-balanced mental state.

i mean even after pple gave up on religion, they always look for an alternative like pple become addicted to music with all its weird genres/rituals and other stuff to fulfill an ambiguous spiritual need inside each and everyone of us.


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## Golf72

neat thread..


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## Rains

Not for me. And you don't need to be religious to be spiritual.


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## firelight

Probably, because my thoughts incline to religious matters. Would be nice to have positive and affirming ideas instead of only negation and doubt. I even think I might've fit in to monk or priest as a profession if I had requisite belief, training, and not crippled with SA. And of course as you point out there's the community aspect too. But I've never participated in any spiritual community that didn't repulse me in some way.


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## either/or

Not really, but maybe I'd have more of a false sense of hope and feel slightly better. I don't believe in fairy tales however.


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## neen

You can still have a crutch. Our society is full of various communities and ideologies. It's not just "God will save me from suffering" vs "I'm ****ed". But I agree that religion is pretty wide-spread so its easier to find some support locally. We all need to find what is interesting, makes us passionate and try to find value in it.


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## WillYouStopDave

Simpler isn't necessarily easier. Simple can be tedious and boring and frustrating and difficult to endure.


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## strange_world

I do wonder about this a lot. Could I ever actually be a Christian?

I mean, I'd have to give up listening to certain metal bands. That's about it. I'm practically living like a monk already anyway. I'm going to die eventually and I might as well make peace with God. I have very few other sources of hope and solace left in my life. 

It might make me less neurotic and more helpful to other people. I'm unlikely to get much help from the mental health services any more.

I did try to go to church for a little while in the past but I found the Anglican church I went to was quite a sad place. It was quiet and solemn and the few people who turned up each Sunday all seemed slightly depressed. It wasn't what I had imagined at all. Being religious hadn't seemed to make their lives any happier. That's what put me off really.

I'll have to start thinking about all this, anyway. Especially as I get older and the inevitable starts to seem a little closer.


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## Shiny-appocalypse-cookies

LOL 🤣...Um hell no, much more difficult if anything.


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## Zeinner

Maybe but at the same time me being religious would mean that I'm basically a different person so it would just be me being replaced by someone else.


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## aqwsderf

Maybe I'd feel a bigger sense of community?


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## Starcut83

I'm not religious, I just don't know.

I think many religious people struggle with their faith often. Even if it's only on the inside.


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## sweeth3art

andy0128 said:


> It strikes me that one of our problems is the hopelessness that arises from feeling rejected by society, whereas religious people still have their faith to fall back on. Do we need a crutch or something else to distract us from those feelings of inadequacy and not fitting in?


from personal experience, not really, i use the memory of deceased people that were close to me always having my back, that, and there’s always [not naming for respectful reasons] that has my back as well.


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## Omni-slash

I think you have to be incredibly naive, or bordeline psychopathic to truly take the world at face value, I lucked out in that regard. Religion seems like a normal defence mechanism for a healthy mind.


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