# Why does school focus on socializing and team work?



## VanHalen (Jun 2, 2015)

Well I was reading the ratings on ratemyteacher.com for the teachers I got for the next semester and the reoccuring idea was that all my teachers are extroverted. Surprisingly, even the gym teacher I will have forces kids to socialize amongst each other. Why do the teachers care so much about socializing? It isn't possible to just let me do my work and leave? I've lost just about all interest socializing because my classmates always label me something along the lines of ''boring intellectual'' or ''weird''. If it's not that then it's them generalizing me by my nationality. I assume that the motivation on the teacher's part is based on the idea of ''working as a team'' or ''forming a community'' but why should I bother socializing if my peers automatically dislike/hate me because I'm not an athletic/macho guy?


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## iCod (Feb 17, 2015)

Teachers love to torture quiet kids.


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## legallyalone (Jan 24, 2014)

Socializing with your peers is more important to your future success and happiness than anything you learn in your classes.


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## minasaki96 (Jun 13, 2015)

My personal belief is that school is partially for actually teaching you the foundation to learn (the alphabet, basic maths, general science and social studies),but outside of that I believe it is mostly to train the population to be a good worker for society. One of the most important things I think to get ahead in the workplace (having had a job since i was 13 for personal reasons) is that, the power and intellect of one person is limited if you cant work together in a team to solve bigger things and you need to know how to socialize for that. Many high paying jobs and careers require you to know and network people to get higher in your pay grade. I realllyyy understand what you mean by teachers basically torturing the silent kids because you are still working on your SA, anxiety and other stuff. It doesnt help that they kind of just throw you in, expecting you to socialize well like the other kids.


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## TheSilentGamer (Nov 15, 2014)

No real reason. They just enjoy watching us suffer, which is a shame since I manage to do my work fine when I'm by myself. Everything goes downhill when you're forced to join a group.


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## ShatteredGlass (Oct 12, 2012)

Teaching is an extrovert-focused profession. It's all about dealing with other people, so I'm guessing that a large chunk of teachers are extroverted, and as such, often don't understand students who are more quiet/anxious. They might not know how to deal with non-extroverted students, and thus, just try to make them mix with other kids in the hope that they'll 'grow out' of their shyness/social anxiety.

The ability to socialize and work in a team is essential for optimal performance in the workforce as well as life in general.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Because it's probably the single most critical element to success in the real world. People who crap social skills are going to find it substantially more difficult to function and succeed out of school. This forum should be proof enough of this.


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## Surly Wurly (May 9, 2015)

well its pretty hard to get on in life if you arent given the opportunity to socialise properly, i kinda thought thats why we were all here


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## ScorchedEarth (Jul 12, 2014)

Preparation to be an efficient wage slave that won't obstruct productivity in the workplace by not cooperating with the other drones.


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## VeryLoco (Mar 23, 2014)

So they dont end up like us


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## gopherinferno (Apr 7, 2009)

the more time you have the kids talk among themselves, the less time you have to spend actually talking and teacher yourself. it's lazy.


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## sad vlad (Nov 9, 2013)

*Why does school focus on socializing and team work?

*Cause you'll need them in life. We have problems rising to our true potential when we avoid those 2 like the plague.The opportunities are passing us by.


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## AHolivier (Aug 6, 2009)

.


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## andy0128 (Dec 19, 2003)

They are important in life. Even if we hate it developing some social skills is necessary. If you go through life without experiencing a few harsh lessons along the way then sooner or later you will get found out.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

How necessary is forced socializing in schools, _really_?

I'd like to know what a more introverted country (say, Japan or Switzerland, two countries that are usually labeled that way) does with their students compared to what we do here.


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## EmotionlessThug (Oct 4, 2011)

Makes 0 sense. School doesn't teach us how to socialize in America. I'm not sure how it is for other countries out there. 

Is there a class for socializing in school?


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## mattmc (Jun 27, 2013)

Surly Wurly said:


> well its pretty hard to get on in life if you arent given the opportunity to socialise properly, i kinda thought thats why we were all here





VeryLoco said:


> So they don't end up like us


Yep. One of my first college experiences was not introducing myself, but introducing another student. Because anxiety about being able to say my own name and a little about myself wasn't enough. I had to feel double the stress and risk screwing up their name after they properly introduced me.

I actually love the teacher but it's just a sign of extrovertism in today's society. There are potential benefits of course. Being around people could creative positive relationships, have individuals acquire empathy, develop memory skills, etc. But if they can't socialize they're just left feeling broken and like they're a freak.



Just Lurking said:


> How necessary is forced socializing in schools, _really_?
> 
> I'd like to know what a more introverted country (say, Japan or Switzerland, two countries that are usually labeled that way) does with their students compared to what we do here.


I'm not an expert but what I've heard about the school system in Japan is that the bullying is terrible, the stress from the workload and focus on tests is ridiculous, and suicide is common.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

mattmc said:


> I'm not an expert but what I've heard about the school system in Japan is that the bullying is terrible, the stress from the workload and focus on tests is ridiculous, and suicide is common.


Japan seems to be an anomaly in that sense. They have a high level of academic pressure, but that can exist in either environment.

Sweden and Iceland are two other countries reputed as more introverted than not. They have the lowest rates of reported bullying incidents in the world, and their suicide rates (according to the W.H.O.) are around that of the U.S. (Switzerland, for its part, has a very low suicide rate, but higher rates of bullying reports.)

So, maybe Japan wouldn't be the best example of what would happen if we made our schools a little more introvert-friendly~


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## mattmc (Jun 27, 2013)

Just Lurking said:


> Japan seems to be an anomaly in that sense. They have a high level of academic pressure, but that can exist in either environment.
> 
> Sweden and Iceland are two other countries reputed as more introverted than not. They have the lowest rates of reported bullying incidents in the world, and their suicide rates (according to the W.H.O.) are around that of the U.S. (Switzerland, for its part, has a very low suicide rate, but higher rates of bullying reports.)
> 
> So, maybe Japan wouldn't be the best example of what would happen if we made our schools a little more introvert-friendly~


This is from memory but I heard in Japan that if you don't do well on your high school tests, the ones that colleges look at, then many have the notion that they are effectively doomed to mediocrity and will never succeed in life. Supposedly this applies to their love lives as well as Japan is very competitive in that regard. Japan is in many ways like America but in some respects harsher.

I have two online friends from Sweden. They've always seemed quite happy. A lot of European countries seemed to be more positive environments but I don't know much about how that relates to their schooling.


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## tyrannosaurusbex (Jun 19, 2015)

it's true that you often need the ability to converse with strangers and "work well with others" if you want to go anywhere in life. But I wish that group projects weren't so frequently required in high school and college! Oftentimes, it just turns out crap for everyone - one person does all the work and doesn't get enough credit, most everyone doesn't enjoy it, it stresses the introverts and people with SA out way too much... and even though it's supposed to help you prepare for real life, it never actually helped me get better at socializing...? I still hate it and still suck at it. just a thought. I'm new here


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## VanHalen (Jun 2, 2015)

I just see the group work as another way of people showing that they hate being by themselves and that they need to constantly interact with others. Most of the teachers are obviously extroverts so I could understand why they seem to think socializing is important. I don't see how working as a team has anything to do with a future job. Most jobs assign you one specific task in order to increase production. Yeah my co-workers would probably hate me because I would ignore them but I'm not there to make friends. Most would call me ''arrogant'' anyways if I show even the slightest amount of confidence in myself and I don't want to deal with that foolishness. Half the time people try to make me miserable and bring me down to their level of misery so that's why I ignore them. In the other half, people call me boring because I don't follow trends or share their beliefs


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## wmu'14 (Sep 17, 2010)

1.) Socializing is unfortunately very, very important in the work world, as I am finding out now that I'm done with school. Many jobs, specifically, high paying jobs, require teamwork and lots of human interaction. Companies have a lot of social events too so it continues there. 

2.) Teachers believe that students learn by working with other people. Eyeroll. The reality is the few motivated kids do all the work and the many unmotivated kids don't do anything.

3.) As has been said, many teachers are social themselves. Ever notice the classes you have a lot of groupwork in is with the more extroverted teachers?


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## iCod (Feb 17, 2015)

wmu'14 said:


> 1.) Socializing is unfortunately very, very important in the work world, as I am finding out now that I'm done with school. Many jobs, specifically, high paying jobs, require teamwork and lots of human interaction. Companies have a lot of social events too so it continues there.
> 
> 2.) Teachers believe that students learn by working with other people. Eyeroll. The reality is the few motivated kids do all the work and the many unmotivated kids don't do anything.
> 
> 3.) As has been said, many teachers are social themselves. Ever notice the classes you have a lot of groupwork in is with the more extroverted teachers?


1.) This just makes me even more terrified of going into the real world and having to find a job.

2.) This is so unbelievably true it's shameful. Whenever there are group projects, there is usually just one or rarely two students that do the entire thing while the rest (usually popular/lazy/extroverted normies) chat the entire time. I'm usually the one doing all the work.

3.) This is also very true. We really need more introverted and secluded teachers in this world.


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## myTearsAreRainbows (Jun 22, 2015)

Because socializing is normal and healthy. 
As humans, we wouldn't ever have been able to reach where we are in society, science, engineering, maths, technology, etc etc without socialization. It's a part of who we are and you need to know how to do it to be successful. Not to mention it's needed for a healthy, happy brain. 

Look at animals raised in captivity without any socialization, they become depressed, hostile and generally violent and scared when they are made to socialize without any prerequisite to socialization. 

Yes it can be discomforting to people like us, but that just means we aren't use to it yet. It's in all our best interests to socialize as much as possible. 
Just because you don't like it doesn't mean it's bad for you. I'm happy your school is looking out for its students, I hope you make some friends


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## myTearsAreRainbows (Jun 22, 2015)

wmu'14 said:


> 1.)
> 2.) Teachers believe that students learn by working with other people. Eyeroll. The reality is the few motivated kids do all the work and the many unmotivated kids don't do anything.


Kind of exactly like real life? It's almost like they are preparing you for the real world.


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## wmu'14 (Sep 17, 2010)

I'm probably one of the few on here who wishes school was ALL socializing and teamwork. That's exactly how it is in real life and it completely sucks and makes me want to just give up on everything right now. 
-------------------
It would've either helped me improve, or made me not look as good because I did really good in school in the current format of where you're not necessarily graded that much on teamwork. That is, exams are worth more and you do those by yourself.


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## You Reach I Teach (Feb 20, 2015)

Schools are part of the government, this "forcing socialising" is basically a brainwashing technique to make you follow the trends like a good little sheeple.


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## 2Milk (Oct 29, 2014)

You know what's useless and a waste of time? Introducing yourself to the whole class on the first day. After 10 secs they have already forgotten your name and hobbies etc......(unless you're awkward and make a fool out of yourself)

I think being social is a way for people to escape the ****yness of life. You can't think much when you talk a lot and you can't talk much when you think a lot.


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## acidicwithpanic (May 14, 2014)

Once you enter the workforce, you'll be working in teams regardless of what career you're going for. Even more "introverted" professions like engineering require some communication and assistance from coworkers to get things done efficiently and quickly. My last job as a property inspector involved a lot of texting as opposed to face-to-face communication, but I still had to attend meetings and provide some input to my boss to improve the business.


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## Darktower776 (Aug 16, 2013)

gopherinferno said:


> the more time you have the kids talk among themselves, the less time you have to spend actually talking and teacher yourself. it's lazy.


I feel that there is some truth to this as well.


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## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

Cause teachers don't know that introverts, that represents HALF of the population, work better alone. Forcing them to be in groups is like isolating an extrovert.

The also did this at the freaking Psychology College, I mean, for real ? From all the people psychology teachers should know best how things work. Aside from making us present ourselves in front of the whole 200+ student classroom. More than once.


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## KawaiiHime (Oct 10, 2013)

legallyalone said:


> Socializing with your peers is more important to your future success and happiness than anything you learn in your classes.


no, it's not.

team works are bull****. you know who loves them? those lazy students who would rather be fooling around than doing some work. in the group work, they don't do anything; it's always one (or two) student who does all the work. or all start bullying one student. teachers need to understand and accept the fact that there are some student who are introverted.

btw, when you say stuff like ''school prepares you for the real world'', you only confirm that the school isn't ''a real world''. i once had a teachers who wouldn't let me change seat so i had to sit next to a bully. the reason? ''cause when you'll be working in an office, you wouldn't like all people there!'' that's another bull****. i would NEVER work in an office! second, if there were people bullying me at work to the point where i couldn't take anymore, i would simply change jobs. once there were TWO students who sat alone and the teacher said that the half of the class were sitting alone. :roll
@VeryLoco you mean, like us introverts? and being an introverted is bad because....? also, i don't believe being an introverted is something the one can ''learn''. you're simply born with it. when i recall, i've always liked to do stuff alone more than in the group. 
@wisteria i wish i were asian. :sigh


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## apx24 (Jan 31, 2012)

The sooner you realise that you have to work with others the better. It's ****ing bull**** and I hate it, but that's what life is.


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## allthatsparkles (Mar 1, 2013)

VanHalen said:


> Why do the teachers care so much about socializing? It isn't possible to just let me do my work and leave?


I understand your frustration, but social skills are important to learn. Most careers will require you to have some basic social skills, including the ability to work well within a team environment. There are very few jobs that you can do in complete isolation -- you will likely have to work with other people in some capacity.

Not to mention that socializing is often key when it comes to career building -- networking, getting 'good' assignments, etc. can all depend on how well you're able to mesh with other people. You obviously do not have to be the most outgoing, extroverted person, but you should be able to hold a decent conversation and work with others, without too much trouble.


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## iCod (Feb 17, 2015)

allthatsparkles said:


> *but you should be able to hold a decent conversation and work with others, without too much trouble.*


Well I guess I'm never finding a job then. Can't even slightly do either of those things :/

I bet even flipping burgers at McDonalds requires you to talk to people. ****ing hell. Why can't I just earn money (easily) on my own and not have to freaking talk to people or be around them? Ughh....


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## allthatsparkles (Mar 1, 2013)

iCod said:


> Well I guess I'm never finding a job then. *Can't even slightly do either of those things :/*
> 
> I bet even flipping burgers at McDonalds requires you to talk to people. ****ing hell. Why can't I just earn money (easily) on my own and not have to freaking talk to people or be around them? Ughh....


You can learn. I was super introverted in high school but I took a few communication classes in college (not a part of my major, but I took them for personal growth) and it is possible to learn how to hold a conversation or give a presentation. It was terrifying at first and yes, I made a COMPLETE idiot of myself a few times (and proceeded to feel embarrassed for a while afterwards) but I kept forcing myself to do it, and it did get better eventually.

There's lots of free information on the Internet about getting over the fear of public speaking, talking to new people, etc. and then PRACTICE. The "practice" part is the most important -- even if you repeatedly fail, even if it's discouraging, you can't stop trying. It will get easier with time.

If your main problem is casual conversation, my suggestion is to start with people you'll likely never see again -- and start small. For example, the next time you are in the grocery store, ask the person in front of you in line about a food item they're purchasing -- "Oh, are those frozen burgers good? I've been meaning to try them out." You can literally use this exact line (with whatever item they might be purchasing) and do it over and over and over and over and over again, till it feels easy and natural.

Another tip is to start with service professionals -- e.g. your waiter/waitress, the sales rep at the store, etc. These people are meant to be nice and friendly, so they're an "easy" target for small chit-chat/small talk. Plus, they've likely encountered so many rude customers, they'll welcome someone actually being nice -- ask them how their day is going, say thank you, ask how good X item is on the menu, etc.


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