# Holy crap, I talk to people now.



## sda0 (Oct 16, 2009)

So, brief time line:

*Thursday*: Went out for a drink with a friend. After ordering the drink, a coworker calls and says he's at another bar; we head over there. I have a conversation with an older lady, then I send drinks over to a table of 3 cute girls. This is completely out of character for me (and I wasn't even drunk!) We ended up talking and hanging out for a few hours; I met two of their boyfriends. The girls gave me a hug when I left and said they hope to see me again at the bar.

*Friday: *Going-away dinner for a friend at a mexican cantina. On my way coming back to our table from the bathroom, two girls caught my eye standing at the bar. I walked up to them and said "Excuse me, my friend wont do a shot of tequila with me and I don't want to look like an alcoholic. Would you join me?" They said sure, we had a drink and talked for about 30 minutes before we parted ways.

*Saturday*: Went to a sports bar that I've always wanted to check out. Talked to two 21 year old girls for a while, then the friends they were waiting for showed up and they left. Another girl comes up and starts dancing next to me; I decide 'what the hell' and start doing awkward movements that only slightly resembled dancing. We ended up going to the dancefloor and dancing for a while, then a really cute girl came up and introduced herself, and she and I danced for over an hour. The kicker? This bar has cameras that broadcast anyone on the dancefloor to 30 flatscreen TVs mounted throughout the bar. Yup, I got my groove on in front of a few hundred people watching TV.

I stress that a few months ago I would never have even gone to these places, let alone talked to people, let alone *initiated* the conversations. It feels pretty amazing to lose that little voice inside that says "oh god they're going to judge you, don't talk, just stare at your drink!"

Being social rules.


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## AriesTrying (Mar 19, 2009)

aaaaand... your secret?


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## MindOverMood (Dec 12, 2009)

That's great to hear bro


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## OregonMommy (Mar 3, 2010)

:clap:boogie:bananaGood for you!


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## matty (Nov 2, 2009)

I am at a similar stage to you. Just breaking through and doing the same things. It is an incredible feeling. I did something which resembled dancing on saturday night. Lucky for me I wasnt shown on big screen tvs. 

 well done


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## JaiUnSoucis (Oct 22, 2008)

could never imagine doing those kinds of things

bravo dude


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## sda0 (Oct 16, 2009)

Thanks everyone!!



AriesTrying said:


> aaaaand... your secret?


Medication, talk therapy, self-confidence, and pushing myself outside of my comfort zone because hey, why the hell not?


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## slkjao (Aug 5, 2009)

ur thread title should have been holy crap, am i the shiznit now or what?
i look forward to meeting u


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Wooo, SA?? What SA!!!


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

sda0 said:


> Thanks everyone!!
> 
> Medication, talk therapy, self-confidence, and pushing myself outside of my comfort zone because hey, why the hell not?


Side effects....:roll :boogie :boogie :boogie


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## rctriplefresh5 (Aug 24, 2009)

damn that bar with the tvs sounds fun...and a must visit for anyone who wants to truly be sure they are progressing with their SA.

i actually wanna try that and i cant dance .


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## sda0 (Oct 16, 2009)

rctriplefresh5 said:


> damn that bar with the tvs sounds fun...and a must visit for anyone who wants to truly be sure they are progressing with their SA.
> 
> i actually wanna try that and i cant dance .


As I said to the girl who asked if I wanted to dance; "I can't dance, but I will" 

And yeah, being on TV in front of 400 of your closest friends and dancing like you're alone in your room will definitely tell you that you've come a long way.


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## Pam (Feb 14, 2009)

Holy crap--what a great story! It's nice to see that people DO make progress! Very inspiring. Keep it up--you have a really great attitude!:clap

Also, I love the phrase "started doing awkward movements that only slightly resembled dancing." LOL!


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## Miss Meggie (Nov 19, 2009)

I've had similar experiences lately. I haven't been to numerous bars, but I've been spending time with a few new friends. One new friend in particular hangs out with me almost every day now; we eat dinner together and usually hang out after class. And we text and talk on facebook.
He's also introduced me to several of his friends and I've been talking with them as well.


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## Catching Fire (Apr 23, 2009)

That's awesome and what your doing is pretty much my goal right now. Luckily I feel like I'm on the right path where it should happen soon though. 

I hope thing continue to go well for you .


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## TheOutsider (Mar 4, 2010)

That is so awesome to hear!!! =D


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## Fitzer (Feb 13, 2010)

Thats awesome dude! I hope I can reach that stage soon. Just keep being persistent with whatever you're doing, because obviously its working!


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## spaceygirl (Dec 4, 2009)

sda0 said:


> So, brief time line:
> 
> *Thursday*: Went out for a drink with a friend. After ordering the drink, a coworker calls and says he's at another bar; we head over there. I have a conversation with an older lady, then I send drinks over to a table of 3 cute girls. This is completely out of character for me (and I wasn't even drunk!) We ended up talking and hanging out for a few hours; I met two of their boyfriends. The girls gave me a hug when I left and said they hope to see me again at the bar.
> 
> ...


Way to go!!!! :boogieand good job with the icebreaker/tequila shot thing, creative


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## Falcons84 (Feb 8, 2010)

sda0 said:


> Thanks everyone!!
> 
> Medication, talk therapy, self-confidence, and pushing myself outside of my comfort zone because hey, why the hell not?


I would do the same but my face gets so red if I do. So i cant hide my social anxiety one bit. IF only my face just didnt turn red. Thats all Im fearing.


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## sda0 (Oct 16, 2009)

Falcons84 said:


> I would do the same but my face gets so red if I do. So i cant hide my social anxiety one bit. IF only my face just didnt turn red. Thats all Im fearing.


So lets say your face turns red. So what? No one is gonna point at you and yell "RED FACE RED FACE LOOK AT THIS STRAWBERRYMAN!"  Worst case scenario they just notice youre nervous and after a minute or two of talking you're fine

I'm really trying the mindset of "Whats the worst that could happen? What if someone reacted like I am while talking to me, what would I think?" Its helped a lot!


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

Ah yes, and you know the best part of it right?

Well...

The best part is that things will only get better! I'm just waiting a couple months from now to hear you be the next motivational moderator (that tends to happen around here when SAers do these things):yes


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## Dub16 (Feb 28, 2010)

Hololon said:


> *Find More Drugs At >>> Detraxt.com > Detraxt.com*


*

I would love to kick your head in. Leave us alone and Get a life! Muppet*


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Dub16 said:


> I would love to kick your head in. Leave us alone and Get a life! Muppet


Pretty sure you are talking to a bot lol.


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## fredbloggs02 (Dec 14, 2009)

Whe someone pushes me off the plank I can talk to people. 

"All mongols fear lightning. I had nowhere to hide so I wasn't frightened any more." Ghengis Kahn.


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## Billy87 (Oct 11, 2006)

Congratulations! I've had moments at bars like that when I'll try to talk to a girl I don't know, but I completely draw a blank and all of a sudden I have nothing to say.


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## Anatomica (May 23, 2005)

hey..I saw you on cam earlier at the tinychat, and it seemed like you were super comfortable whereas I would be freaking out, so this is why! cuz you had a breakthrough, that's great man, hopefully I can reach that point of social comfort someday.


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