# Work Place Gossip/Paranoia



## texguy (May 12, 2015)

Hello!

I've been having problems at work, but they may just all be in my head. Last week my supervisor had us do a team building exercise where we talked about things that "make us go" and things that "ticks us off (or makes us upset)." My coworkers said things that upset them such as people "lying, being arrogant, having ill intentions, etc."

For some reason after the meeting, I felt drained because I thought they were talking about me. I'm always paranoid that people will think bad things about me, and I always want people to like me. Even though I'm not a liar, and don't have ill intentions, I am sometimes arrogant), these things got to me. I guess I'm always thinking people are talking about me because my coworkers and my boss are always gossiping (even about other coworkers). Also, 2 of my coworkers have said mean things to me such as once I had "grandiose" thinking and another said, "I only have my family because no one else will put up with my stuff." I do agree that I wasn't the friendliness to my coworkers when I first started my job, but I've been there a year and 5 months.

I have asked my boss for evaluations a few times and always assures me I'm doing a good job and she has never has any negative criticisms for me.

I think it doesn't help that I'm getting a master's in psychology because I'm always diagnosing myself. I also "know" I shouldn't let a few isolated incidents get to me, but I do.

Any help or suggestions?


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## Reckless89 (Jun 24, 2015)

Hi, 
don't worry, don't worry about the thoughts of the other people, you can't read minds!
The same things happened to me, to think that the other people speak about me in negative.
But please you don't care about the thoughts of the other, because the other people don't care about your thoughts!


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## AHolivier (Aug 6, 2009)

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## littlecupcake (Apr 14, 2015)

I'm the same way, too . I understand. I like my job too. But I fear that one day my former so-called friends and the former bullies will come back and work in the same place as I. I fear they may turn some people against me. The sad truth is that even when people are adult does not necessarily mean they are going to be decent people or mature. With that keep up the good work and when you hear gossip or anything just ignore it, I know easier said than done. with that :squeeze and take care


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## Ramune (Nov 12, 2015)

Oh my god, texguy, I started crying because I have been in a same shoe for a long time. First assignment, my boss told me every time I am doing a good job. But I was so scared what other people are thinking of me. You know the office is crowded with a lot of people. I ended up having director of the office told temp agency that I spread the rumor that people in the office are not nice. I went to the office in the morning and just run away from the office after I was told by temp agency I shouldn't go there anymore. I regret I really didn't need to pay attention to other people. Then I finally got the long term temp job. People are really nice but I got a bit sad by one of the coworker's behavior and went to bar. Then I started telling my husband about them. Then I started getting paranoid. I thought she was listening to me at the bar. I wrote a letter to her to apologize. I was crazy because I didn't wanna get fired. Then my paranoia got worse. My boss kept telling me you are doing a great job but you need to stop interrupting my work and another boss's work. But I was do paranoid. Every morning, I hear the group or click walk next to the aile and started going to their boss's office and started talking about my work. Every morning for about 3 months. 
There was a nice lady sitting next to me. I almost everyday I am worried if I am doing a good job. But I wasn't talking to her. I was talking to other people sitting in the office so that they know that I am aware of my poor work. I got really paranoid. Finally, I said to my supervisors I quit. I wrote a letter that I am responsible for making this office's work slow because of me. After that I even though a group of people were angry because I started calling another temp agency and planning to leave before 2 weeks notice. So I went to my direct supervisor and she was upset saying no one is saying the things like that.
Then you know what on my last day, I kept working, this is me, I like to work no matter I am leaving on the same day. You know what, I peeded on my pants. To make matters worse, I went back to my desk and sat down on the chair. The nice lady took me to my apartment so that I can change. I should have stayed home. As soon as I got work, I knew everyone understood that I peeded on my pants. The supervisor who have been nice to me didn't say you did a nice job. Thank you for returning your badge. Good luck, another supervisor just grimed at me and waved her hand. I moved as soon as I can to get off the office. I am now so scared because temp world is so small, people in a same race have a big group. (like church group) You know everyone in this city recognize that I am Asian who peeded on her pants and sat on her chair . How disgusting is that. I am paranoid. I go to coffee shop, restaurant, I am so scared they are talking about me. And I became crazy in public. I cried like a baby and even started laughing abnormaly in public. My phy changed my medicine but my paranoia didn't go away and strong medicine gave me a strong side affect I moved my body like crazy. 

Sorry I shared my story. It may not help you. I wanted to tell you that you are not the only one and thank you for sharing your thought. I am applying for disability insurance. It is really hard because we can't live without my income. We are talking about bankcrupt. My husband and I both know that I can't work in a same type of environment. I feel so guilty for my parents to pay all the tuition for university and it doesn't help my career at all. Last time I went back to see my family, I will not forget my dad's disappointment because I am not explaning something very well or not doing a good job translating. I am sorry get back to you, I think you should aim for master degree. It would help your career I am sure. I want to go back to school. I want to improve my language skill. (I speak Spanish OK, I spent about one and half year in Hispanic speaking country. 

My husband said a same thing texguy, you need to get going. Don't beat your self up. texguy, we can do this right? I do meditation with my husband almost everyday. There is a book called The Tao of Bipolar. I am still having a difficult time doing meditation because I breath sometime like I am having a panic attack. But I tell myself things will get better if I keep meditating.

Yes, texguy, it gets me everyday too. I am worried about my future. If my husband is gone. What should I do? I really don't wanna go back to my family's house. I even googled what city if the best place to be homeless. Now, I really hope I can get disability insurance. Yes, I am a green card holder (My husband is US citizen) but I had paid tax till three months ago. I worked about 11 years. So The citizens in this country, please help me the person like me. Please the people who decide the people who get disability, I will promise I will be cured with paranoia and bipolar action. 

texguy, I know you may have gotten the negative reaction when you told someone about your paranoia. Me too. I think my great friends now keeping away from me. But it was meant to be, right? We need to get going. You just met me online too. So I think you can contact me trough this page, right? If you feel like it, I hope you will email me.

texguy, we can let things away. There are so many good things happening in this world. We can go back to work place and you may be able to save up your money to go to my country. It is beautiful. I hope no I know you can make it!


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## HellCell (Jul 8, 2014)

I just had an unpleasant experience at work earlier, where I had a misunderstanding with my supervisor and responded with something to the effect of "Were you even listening?"

He was in a bad mood today and took what I said literally. Doing it that way would of course make me look bad, but if he read between the lines and worked with me a little, I wouldn't have sounded so dumb.

I'm sure this will stir up some gossip because people frequent conversations about incompetent workers for various things. Frustrates me.


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