# Will men be turned off by a woman that's never had a boyfriend?



## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

I'm in my late 20's and never had a boyfriend and really embarrassed by this. It makes it worse because I know I'm beautiful and have a nice body, but I have bad anxiety when it comes to men and I'm afraid to open up and let them in my life because I'm afraid of what he'll think of me.


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## soulless (Dec 18, 2010)

I wouldn't be at all


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Maybe? You have to find out first.


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## Consider (May 1, 2013)

Await the private messages.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Nope, unless she's religious or not interested in sex.


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## BrookeHannigan (Mar 29, 2012)

Lol its so funny on sa guys are insecure and the girls have the biggest egos
Maybe work on that


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## lolwhyme (Apr 26, 2013)

Most guys would think it's cute.

But really you don't even have to tell him if you don't want to. As far as he knows, you've had a regular dating life. It's really none of his business.


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## Dear turtle (Sep 7, 2011)

Well this is an SA forum and most guys who reply to this thread probably haven't even been in a relationship or/and have SA therefore would be more accepting towards a female in a similar position. Personally I feel depending on age most guys would love it, be indifferent towards it, find it strange ("you're beautiful and you've never had a bf something must be wrong with you...") or hate it ("I want a more experienced women").


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## Brad (Dec 27, 2011)

I doubt it's something that most guys would find as a turn off. I don't think it would really matter that much.


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## Jig210 (Jan 24, 2013)

Nope not at all and honestly its non of there business. I wouldn't bring it up unless they ask about it. Like daveyboy said though, most guys really don't want to know about a woman's past relationships. They get all jealous, insecure, and tend to hold it against them if they're douches. Basically Don't ask Don't tell policy! I always tell the women I see the past is the past I really don't want to know.


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## Anxietyriddled (Jan 5, 2013)

I think some men would be a little off put for just a couple reasons. And of course some men with out much ethics would want to take advantage. You never had a boyfriend so you are probably developmentally challenged socially, especially since you say its not by choice but a mental barrier causing you intimacy issues. Also I think some men would feel bad for you because that's a long time to be alone, and you could have had years and years of good memories, fun, and sex but missed out.

People in general want a partner who is their equal, how can they find you an equally worthy partner if they feel bad for you? And the pressure to be a good first boyfriend and not let you down. If it doesn't work out they might feel you might become clingy or mentally obsessive unable to move on. How ever even with these issues, you should have no problem finding a man who can see past it if you make a good effort. Most men probably wouldn't care, maybe even think the less men have had you is better for them XD


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Capcom said:


> Well this is an SA forum and most guys who reply to this thread probably haven't even been in a relationship or/and have SA therefore would be more accepting towards a female in a similar position. Personally I feel depending on age most guys would love it, be indifferent towards it, find it strange ("*you're beautiful and you've never had a bf something must be wrong with you...*") or hate it ("I want a more experienced women").


Yeah something is wrong with me I have social anxiety and I think I have avoidant personality disorder.


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## brettfavre4life (Apr 20, 2012)

I wouldn't care at all.


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## Gracie97 (Jan 17, 2013)

Being physically beautiful with a nice body doesn't guarantee you a boyfriend.. what about your personality?


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

BrookeHannigan said:


> Lol its so funny on sa guys are insecure and *the girls have the biggest egos*
> Maybe work on that


No I don't have a big ego. People tell me all the time how beautiful I am. Everywhere I go men are always staring at me. People are always surprised that I'm single.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Gracie97 said:


> Being physically beautiful with a nice body doesn't guarantee you a boyfriend.. what about your personality?


I don't have one. That's why it sucks. The only thing I got going for me are my looks. So when I'm feeling down, I always tell myself I look so much better than those other people that make me feel bad about myself because I'm single and don't have a life.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Anxietyriddled said:


> I think some men would be a little off put for just a couple reasons. And of course some men with out much ethics would want to take advantage. You never had a boyfriend so you are probably developmentally challenged socially, especially since you say its not by choice but a mental barrier causing you intimacy issues. Also I think some men would feel bad for you because that's a long time to be alone, and you could have had years and years of good memories, fun, and sex but missed out.
> 
> People in general want a partner who is their equal, how can they find you an equally worthy partner if they feel bad for you? And the pressure to be a good first boyfriend and not let you down. If it doesn't work out they might feel you might become clingy or mentally obsessive unable to move on. How ever even with these issues, you should have no problem finding a man who can see past it if you make a good effort. Most men probably wouldn't care, maybe even think the less men have had you is better for them XD


Maybe I should just date a fat, bald man because I wouldn't care what he would think of me, but I just can't lower my standards and do that. I would rather die lonely.


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## Rich19 (Aug 11, 2012)

Starss said:


> I'm in my late 20's and never had a boyfriend and really embarrassed by this. It makes it worse because I know I'm beautiful and have a nice body, but I have bad anxiety when it comes to men and I'm afraid to open up and let them in my life because I'm afraid of what he'll think of me.


No I would not care. However saying i know i'm beautiful and have a nice body is a real turn off.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Rich19 said:


> No I would not care. However saying i know i'm beautiful and have a nice body is a real turn off.


And like who gives a rat's ***. I work hard to look beautiful.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

You probably should tell them before you have sex, otherwise they will think you really suck in bed and might lose interest. And maybe don't try to have all your firsts in one go.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

it wouldnt care whether you had previous bf, but i would be a little concerned about someone who thinks they are beautiful and has a nice body its not the fact that you do, imho its more that you found the need to mention it, it may indicate troublesome personality traits, self obsessed, superficial


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## Fenren (Sep 20, 2009)

Guys won't mind at all for the most part, because you're female it's thought as a sound and moral choice. Being Male and the same age and beyond you'd stand no chance in hell though if you were honest about it!


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## Gracie97 (Jan 17, 2013)

Starss said:


> I don't have one. That's why it sucks. The only thing I got going for me are my looks. So when I'm feeling down, I always tell myself I look so much better than those other people that make me feel bad about myself because I'm single and don't have a life.


Well that kind of thinking is not going to do you any good at all.


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## Charmander (Sep 5, 2012)

BrookeHannigan said:


> Lol its so funny on sa guys are insecure and the girls have the biggest egos
> Maybe work on that


She has an overinflated ego because she thinks she looks beautiful and has a nice body? I'd rather people feel good about themselves than constantly think of themselves as ugly.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

life01 said:


> it wouldnt care whether you had previous bf, but i would be a little concerned about someone who thinks they are beautiful and has a nice body its not the fact that you do, imho its more that you found the need to mention it, it may indicate troublesome personality traits, self obsessed, superficial


Well I felt the need to mention that I'm beautiful is because men are going to wonder why I've never had a boyfriend is because of the way I look and wondering that there's obviously something wrong with me.


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## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

No, I find that I respect that for some odd reason. I'm sometimes considered attractive on rare lucky days, and girls ask me if I've ever had a girlfriend. My SA always got in the way.


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## Gracie97 (Jan 17, 2013)

What's your personality like, in all honesty?
why do you think you don't have a boyfriend?


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

Starss said:


> Well I felt the need to mention that I'm beautiful is because men are going to wonder why I've never had a boyfriend is because of the way I look and wondering that there's obviously something wrong with me.


 tbh it never crossed my mind, as looks are subjective, what are 3 qualities about yourself that you consider your best qualities


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

The short answer is no.

The long answer is **** no!


Oh and you don't have to apologize for mentioning your looks. You're not being immodest, some people here are just being dicks.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Gracie97 said:


> What's your personality like, in all honesty?
> why do you think you don't have a boyfriend?


I always reject men when they ask me out because I'm scared of what they'll think of me because I've never had a boyrfriend, no friends, no social life. All I do is work and then come home. I don't have a personality. I'm very quiet because I don't know what to talk about to people and I don't know how to hold a conversation, but when I'm with my family I can talk about stupid things because I don't care what they think of me. I have all the signs of avoidant personality disorder.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

Not at all.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

Anxietyriddled said:


> I think some men would be a little off put for just a couple reasons. And of course some men with out much ethics would want to take advantage.* You never had a boyfriend so you are probably developmentally challenged socially, especially since you say its not by choice but a mental barrier causing you intimacy issues. Also I think some men would feel bad for you because that's a long time to be alone, and you could have had years and years of good memories, fun, and sex but missed out.*
> 
> People in general want a partner who is their equal,* how can they find you an equally worthy partner if they feel bad for you?* And the pressure to be a good first boyfriend and not let you down. If it doesn't work out they might feel you might become clingy or mentally obsessive unable to move on. How ever even with these issues, you should have no problem finding a man who can see past it if you make a good effort. Most men probably wouldn't care, maybe even think the less men have had you is better for them XD


Wow...this post is so true.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

life01 said:


> tbh it never crossed my mind, as looks are subjective, what are 3 qualities about yourself that you consider your best qualities


I have a pretty face such as pretty eyes with long eyelashes and full lips, gorgeous hair and nice boobs and butt.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

EternallyRestless said:


> Wow...this post is so true.


Why would he feel bad for me? He should be lucky to date me and be seen with me. Yeah that's what I would tell myself.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

Starss said:


> I always reject men when they ask me out because I'm scared of what they'll think of me because I've never had a boyrfriend, no friends, no social life. All I do is work and then come home. I don't have a personality. I'm very quiet because I don't know what to talk about to people and I don't know how to hold a conversation, but when I'm with my family I can talk about stupid things because I don't care what they think of me. I have all the signs of avoidant personality disorder.


 dont tell them that youve never had a boyfriend, unless they specifically ask you, most people like talking about their lives, its amazing how many conversations ive had with people and all we talk about is there life, it helps me as im a private person, this book helped me ' how to make friends and influence people' here is a pdf version http://erudition.mohit.tripod.com/_Influence_People.pdf


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

Starss said:


> I have a pretty face such as pretty eyes with long eyelashes and full lips, gorgeous hair and nice boobs and butt.


 imho they are reasons for a one night stand,not a relationship


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

life01 said:


> dont tell them that youve never had a boyfriend, unless they specifically ask you, most people like talking about their lives, its amazing how many conversations ive had with people and all we talk about is there life, it helps me as im a private person, this book helped me ' how to make friends and influence people' here is a pdf version http://erudition.mohit.tripod.com/_Influence_People.pdf


Thanks but I don't want friends. Girls are really fake.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

Starss said:


> Thanks but I don't want friends. Girls are really fake.


 its about making conversation with people


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

Honestly, I'm not a guy and I don't really have any dating experience with guys. I'll offer my guess, but take it with a grain of salt. I don't think most guys bring it up and you shouldn't bring it up either. If you go out of your way to share this information, the guy may fear that you'll be a little clingy since all of this is new to you. If he really wants to know about your relationship history, you can tell him the truth, But play it off like it isn't a big deal at all. Short and sweet. If it isn't a big deal to you, it wouldn't be a big deal to him.

I also think it's ridiculous that people are attacking you for thinking you're pretty. I don't know why it's considered so socially unacceptable to be proud of your physical appearance. (Being proud of your intelligence or artistic ability seems perfectly acceptable.) As long as you don't try to remind everyone of how beautiful you are in every conversation, I don't see a problem.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Secretly Pretentious said:


> Honestly, I'm not a guy and I don't really have any dating experience with guys. I'll offer my guess, but take it with a grain of salt. I don't think most guys bring it up and you shouldn't bring it up either. If you go out of your way to share this information, the guy may fear that you'll be a little clingy since all of this is new to you. If he really wants to know about your relationship history, you can tell him the truth, But play it off like it isn't a big deal at all. Short and sweet. If it isn't a big deal to you, it wouldn't be a big deal to him.
> 
> I also think it's ridiculous that people are attacking you for thinking you're pretty. I don't know why it's considered so socially unacceptable to be proud of your physical appearance. (Being proud of your intelligence or artistic ability seems perfectly acceptable.) As long as you don't try to remind everyone of how beautiful you are in every conversation, I don't see a problem.


Thank you! You gave me really great advice. I like how you said that I shouldn't make it a big deal about how I've never had a boyfriend. I just need to not care about that. Thanks again.


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## creasy (Oct 29, 2012)

Honestly, in most cases yes. But it's not necessarily a deal breaker. There's also a lot of other factors that come into play, most importantly how attractive you are, also your personality and social life. 

If a guy likes you enough, he won't be turned off, however it will be seen as weird, at least at first. If he gets to know you well then he won't care in the end.


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## Anxietyriddled (Jan 5, 2013)

Starss said:


> Why would he feel bad for me? He should be lucky to date me and be seen with me. Yeah that's what I would tell myself.


It's good that you are trying to think positive and build pride and good self esteem in your self, but don't let it lead to arrogance cause that's an ugly trait. Think about it from my perspective. I can really relate to every thing you say because I'm also an older bloomer at 24 and never had a partner or any experience really.

The first thing people usually say about my situation when they find out is "that's sad" or "he must be crazy" I must have heard this about a dozen times by now. Probably a lot more if I actually met new people because they usually eventually find out how I really am, a loner 8_( , because my lack of experience shows through. They usually will instantly be puzzled or shocked by how I could possibly live like this or be this way. People are usually stumped and a awkward tension builds. Then they question me in every negative way possible,"wwhhy not??omg!?, are you asexual? aren't you horny? masturbate alot? are you gay?" I've heard so many ****en rude responses from people. Then my cover is blown and I have to start anew >.< I'm a decent looking man but anxiety disorder can affect any one. No one understands me.

Lucky for you females are usually judged a lot less harshly than males in these situations and I doubt you will have any trouble finding a mate if you are as physically attractive as you say you are.


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## Jason 1 (Jul 26, 2012)

Starss said:


> I'm in my late 20's and never had a boyfriend and really embarrassed by this. It makes it worse because I know I'm beautiful and have a nice body, but I have bad anxiety when it comes to men and I'm afraid to open up and let them in my life because I'm afraid of what he'll think of me.


I think you should be very careful. While it's true that I don't have any relationship experience, I regularly talk to male acquaintances so I know a little about what men are like.

Because of the way you look, many men will manipulate you if given the chance. That is, many men like to have sex with virgins... but then leave. They say that virgins are good for one night stands... but they don't make good girlfriends because they are too clingy (they become too attached).

What I recommend is trying to find a guy who seems very polite, respectful, ethical, and kind.... even if he isn't extroverted or ultra confident. Date him, but wait, at least, a year before considering sex. If you do this, guys who are only interested in your looks will give up (They don't want to have to wait that long).

A true man (one worth calling your boyfriend) will have no problem waiting. Believe it or not, there are a lot of guys like this. That is, there are a lot of guys who ONLY want serious relationships.

I feel protective of you because I believe attractive SA girls are in great risk of being manipulated and used; however, if you use the waiting technique, you shouldn't have to worry about players.

P.S., 
I actually like your honesty regarding your appearance. I'd rather a lady admit to being beautiful than pretend to think they're ugly just to appear morally superior.


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## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

Anxietyriddled said:


> It's good that you are trying to think positive and build pride and good self esteem in your self, but don't let it lead to arrogance cause that's an ugly trait. Think about it from my perspective. I can really relate to every thing you say because I'm also an older bloomer at 24 and never had a partner or any experience really.
> 
> The first thing people usually say about my situation when they find out is "that's sad" or "he must be crazy" I must have heard this about a dozen times by now. Probably a lot more if I actually met new people because they usually eventually find out how I really am, a loner 8_( , because my lack of experience shows through. They usually will instantly be puzzled or shocked by how I could possibly live like this or be this way. People are usually stumped and a awkward tension builds. Then they question me in every negative way possible,"wwhhy not??omg!?, are you asexual? aren't you horny? masturbate alot? are you gay?" I've heard so many ****en rude responses from people. Then my cover is blown and I have to start anew >.< I'm a decent looking man but anxiety disorder can affect any one. No one understands me.
> 
> Lucky for you females are usually judged a lot less harshly than males in these situations and I doubt you will have any trouble finding a mate if you are as physically attractive as you say you are.


I feel you man.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Jason 1 said:


> I think you should be very careful. While it's true that I don't have any relationship experience, I regularly talk to male acquaintances so I know a little about what men are like.
> 
> Because of the way you look, many men will manipulate you if given the chance. That is, many men like to have sex with virgins... but then leave. They say that virgins are good for one night stands... but they don't make good girlfriends because they are too clingy (they become too attached).
> 
> ...


I know I'm always afraid of men using me for sex. I've only been close to one guy when I was 16 and he wanted to have sex with me so bad. I'm so glad I didn't because of my anxiety and I felt like he only liked me because he wanted to sleep with me so bad and take my virginity.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

I don't know. I wouldn't get in a serious relationship with someone that doesn't have any experience.


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## Daveyboy (Jan 13, 2013)

Starss said:


> Maybe I should just date a fat, bald man because I wouldn't care what he would think of me, but I just can't lower my standards and do that. I would rather die lonely.


I'm not fat or bald..but...OUCH!...


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

Just find someone on this site to date who has never had a girlfriend before. Then you don't have to worry about it. There are quite a few of us here.



Charmander said:


> I'd rather people feel good about themselves than constantly think of themselves as ugly.


Me too. Way too much negativity and self-worth issues are going on now.


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## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

Classified said:


> Just find someone on this site to date who has never had a girlfriend before. Then you don't have to worry about it. There are quite a few of us here.
> 
> Me too. Way too much negativity and self-worth issues are going on now.


I don't think long distance relationships have much of a chance sadly, even for those who are introverted. Aside from your emotional needs from connecting with someone just by chatting, there is of course physical needs, and that thing called presence, yearning for someone across the world doesn't seem healthy. What if someone else comes along and swoops the other off their feet, it could be devastating to the other person left in the dust. Trust is very important in relationships, you're putting a lot of trust in someone you hardly even know, let alone met in real life. If you had history together in real life before then that may be another story, yet some of you are placing a lot of faith in the notion that your first or next love, is your true love, even when that person is not even really there. The thought of settling comes to mind, then again who knows. Most people fall in love with the *idea* of love, not the actual person. So just don't get your hopes up is all I'm saying, tread carefully and lightly. Perhaps I'm wrong and there is such a thing as true love, fate, destiny, etc :roll


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

Charmander said:


> I'd rather people feel good about themselves than constantly think of themselves as ugly.


I agree. There's no need to attack her for that sole comment. She's happy with her appearance; that's rare and awesome.



Starss said:


> Maybe I should just date a fat, bald man because I wouldn't care what he would think of me, but I just can't lower my standards and do that. I would rather die lonely.


Calichick's sibling?


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

I don't know who she might live close by to. We are all over the world here.

And since I have zero relationship experience, I am not anywhere close to an expert, but even arranged marriages work for a reason (as an extreme example). I just don't think people are taught how to have relationships and they want their partners to be perfect, when it is really more about working together, sharing good experiences throughout life, and supporting each other during the bad times.


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## theCARS1979 (Apr 26, 2010)

Starss said:


> I'm in my late 20's and never had a boyfriend and really embarrassed by this. It makes it worse because I know I'm beautiful and have a nice body, but I have bad anxiety when it comes to men and I'm afraid to open up and let them in my life because I'm afraid of what he'll think of me.


Hey, I wouldnt be turned off by it, and its great that you like yourself like that. I am also afraid to open up. Ive used alcohol / liquor, some , cups of coffee/starbucks and i feel like Im misunderstood and thought of as strange, awkward. Im worried about what girls think of me not being with anyone for all these years and Im nearing 39. I had a hair translpant, lost 35 pounds. I seem to like them 10 yrs and more younger then me which i dont know if this will be a problem factor later. I guess age is only a number and how you feel. I barely had anyone but two really small relationships and it was 2000.


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## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

It's actually a turn-on.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

Starss said:


> Thanks but I don't want friends. Girls are really fake.


You sound like a real sweetheart.


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## scarpia (Nov 23, 2009)

I think most guys would be afraid that the woman was a wacko. But if a woman is hot enough guys will go for her. But you know you don't have to tell guys that you've never been with anyone. It's not tattooed on your forehead.


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## hydinthebasmnt (Aug 26, 2012)

Is that socialphobia23 guy still around? You sound like just his type of girl.


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## TobeyJuarez (May 16, 2012)

nope, but because you are shy, you might come off as uninterested to the guys that you are interested in.... my best advice is to do your best to make it known to a special someone that u are interested, because for the most part, a guy will get discouraged and give up on a girl unless she shows signs of interest.... like, send a text if you go a couple of days with out communicating with a guy your interested in... when im interested in a girl and she never initiates contact i think that shes either playing games or shes just plain not interested


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

Starss said:


> I'm in my late 20's and never had a boyfriend and really embarrassed by this. It makes it worse because I know I'm beautiful and have a nice body, but I have bad anxiety when it comes to men and I'm afraid to open up and let them in my life because I'm afraid of what he'll think of me.


No. I actually prefer it.


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## ThatGuy11200 (Sep 3, 2012)

I've never asked my girlfriend if she had a boyfriend before me, she's never asked if I had a girlfriend. Neither of us care about that. The only thing that matters to me is that she's with me and I'm with her.


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## Rich19 (Aug 11, 2012)

Starss said:


> And like who gives a rat's ***. I work hard to look beautiful.


I just think it's funny that your worried about something so insignificant but don't notice this gaping whole in your attractivness. 
Besides the only one who should give a rat's *** is you if your worried about what guys think of you


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## Randomdood13 (Dec 10, 2012)

Honestly knowing a girl is experienced like me is great because we're on the same level and can empathise. So knowing a girl has never had a relationship is a huge plus.


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## walkingonice (May 1, 2013)

Starss: I just started seeing a girl who is 24 and never had a relationship in her life. There's nothing wrong with her, she's just painfully shy (SA). She's smart, ambitious, has a very sweet personality, is slim and gorgeous with the most flawless skin I've ever seen. It doesn't bother me a bit that she's in her mid-twenties and I'm the first guy she's ever dated -- it just means that I need to be patient with her because she doesn't have the relationship experience that the other girls I've dated had, but that's fine by me.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

I'll say the same thing I say about people who are virgins in their 20s, most people will assume you have emotional issues/baggage and not want to deal with you. You'll have to find someone who is either incredibly patient and/or is socially awkward themselves.


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## dal user (Dec 25, 2012)

This is so ****ing ftustrating

I dont even know where some people get half of this stuff from, so basically if you dont have a girlfriend/boyfriend by the time your in your 20's its game over. Well I may as well get used to being a ****ing retarded loner for the rest of my life then.


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## Animekid (Sep 22, 2012)

I would not care, It's fine if she has never had one. Sometimes its hard to find people who interest.


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## GoingBaldSucks (Mar 16, 2013)

TPower said:


> Nope, unless she's religious or not interested in sex.


This.

No, unless she's holding sex ON PURPOSE which is annoying as hell.


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## gaz (Jun 27, 2008)

No. Why one earth would it bother me? 

Would it bother you if the guy had never had a girlfriend?


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

gaz said:


> No. Why one earth would it bother me?
> 
> Would it bother you if the guy had never had a girlfriend?


A girl who is socially normal would think he's a weirdo if he's over 20 or so.


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## AmandaMarie87 (Apr 24, 2013)

I feel exactly the same way as you. I wish I could open up to guys more. I do eventually want to get married and have a kid, but I worry that's not going to happen if I don't change my ways soon.


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## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

Starss said:


> I'm in my late 20's and never had a boyfriend and really embarrassed by this. It makes it worse because I know I'm beautiful and have a nice body, but I have bad anxiety when it comes to men and I'm afraid to open up and let them in my life because I'm afraid of what he'll think of me.


I didn't read most of the posts and it seems like the topic's been adequately answered, but I'll add that I think it'd be a selling point to most guys... in itself. If you do certain abrasive behaviors like you mention doing in part because you're not much familiar with how to handle guys, that's a little different, though.



Gracie97 said:


> Being physically beautiful with a nice body doesn't guarantee you a boyfriend.. what about your personality?


Looks are all that matters for women, don't you know? :b
But seriously, personality is important, yes, especially as you get older.


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## foe (Oct 10, 2010)

Not at all. In fact, she would be marriage material.


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

If you are willing to have sex with them you can be 5 legged , 3 eyed monster under ground without any human contacts ever.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

preston2 said:


> but I'll add that I think it'd be a selling point to most guys... in itself.


I don't see how it could be a selling point (if by selling point you mean good thing) at 28 years of age. People at that age are looking for an adult relationship, not having to deal with someone who when it comes to dating has the mentality of a teenager. People generally expect their partner to be their equal, and a 28 year old who has never been in a relationship is not the equal of a normal person in their late 20s.


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## Cam1 (Dec 4, 2011)

The problem with asking these sorts of questions on SAS is that the majority of us would actually prefer to meet someone like this, where as out in the real world people may be more likely to not prefer it.

Regardless, I think that if someone does care enough to not want to be with you, then is this person really worth being with in the first place?


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

Cam1 said:


> The problem with asking these sorts of questions on SAS is that the majority of us would actually prefer to meet someone like this, where as out in the real world people may be more likely to not prefer it.


Yeah, the only people over age 19 or so who prefer someone inexperienced are those who are inexperienced themselves.


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## Raphael200 (Aug 18, 2012)

Lol,no of course not.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

EternallyRestless said:


> Yeah, the only people over age 19 or so who prefer someone inexperienced are those who are inexperienced themselves.


 youre kidding right


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## ManOfFewWords (Mar 20, 2012)

AllToAll said:


> Calichick's sibling?


That was my first thought too. lol


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## ManOfFewWords (Mar 20, 2012)

EternallyRestless said:


> Yeah, the only people over age 19 or so who prefer someone inexperienced are those who are inexperienced themselves.


Some people might have a fetish for the inexperienced, but for me personally I agree with your statement. I'm one of those inexperienced ones when it comes to long term relationships, and I much prefer a girl in the same boat as me. I don't want the thought in the back of my mind that I'm always being compared to her past boyfriends, not living up to the expectations she's accumulated through previous relationships, etc.


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

Grand said:


> I think your post is 100% correct. :teeth
> 
> I don't know if they would want a relationship with the monster though. *They would likely just use her for sex.*


There is no difference on what they usually do.


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## life01 (Feb 20, 2013)

love the gender stereotypes, i get no sympathy for the times ive been used for my body  but hey what does it matter, im just a bloke


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## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

SnowFlakesFire said:


> If you are willing to have sex with them you can be 5 legged , 3 eyed monster under ground without any human contacts ever.


My understanding of this issue is that men and women will tend to be liberal about who'd they want to do erotic play and be friends with, respectively. Conversely, men tend to be picky about friendships as women are usually picky about erotic partners. 
Following the same logic, a man being sexually interested in one or a woman being socially interested in one tend to have little connection to their romantic interest, but when you flip either two the romance connection is generally stronger.



EternallyRestless said:


> I don't see how it could be a selling point (if by selling point you mean good thing) at 28 years of age. People at that age are looking for an adult relationship, not having to deal with someone who when it comes to dating has the mentality of a teenager. People generally expect their partner to be their equal, and a 28 year old who has never been in a relationship is not the equal of a normal person in their late 20s.


I don't remember ever hearing a guy disparage a woman upon finding out that she never had a romantic relationship. Has any guy in this thread said anything bad about it so far? Going back to the essence of what you're replying to, it's the WHY part that's much more important, I believe. Also the innocence factor is somewhat attractive.



SnowFlakesFire said:


> There is no difference on what they usually do.


Sorry if you've been burned that way.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

if she isn't abnormal then it doesn't make a difference to me. red flags go up anytime you hear of someone older with no dating experience, but you don't know until you experience that person for yourself. need to be a little open minded sometimes


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## Kanova (Dec 17, 2012)

Depends on the person /thread


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## KlLLERtofu (May 5, 2013)

Starss, I get what you are saying... I know you don't walk around saying I am so great and beautiful why don't I have a boyfriend lol people are not getting it Siiiigh I am in the same boat. In my mid 20s never had a boyfriend, yet I do get hit on often and I know I am not unattractive but I have a low self esteem and don't believe I am attractive when given a compliment... I am sacred a guy will be scared away like what the hell is wrong with you or look at me as a conquest which I do not want either. So puts me in this weird position. I also refuse to lower my standards. And when a really attractive and intelligent person does like me, I convince myself that it won't work, I kind of sabotage it. I just hate the look I get when I tell people I don't have a bf or haven't had many, which is a lie because I haven't had any... and there is no way I could just not tell a dude I've never had a bf because he'd figure it out the second he sees how inexperienced I am which is just as embarrassing.  Either way I can relate.


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## gaz (Jun 27, 2008)

EternallyRestless said:


> A girl who is socially normal would think he's a weirdo if he's over 20 or so.


I wouldnt want a girl who held that mindset. Who said there was an age which is deemed "past it" when it comes dating? Who sets these standards? There's no law deeming a person a "weirdo" for not having experienced a relationship by a deadline of twenty or whatever.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

gaz said:


> I wouldnt want a girl who held that mindset. Who said there was an age which is deemed "past it" when it comes dating? Who sets these standards? There's no law deeming a person a "weirdo" for not having experienced a relationship by a deadline of twenty or whatever.


But the thing is there _is_ a range that's considered "normal" and a point that's considered "abnormal." There is a normal pattern to social development, whether people like it or not.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

EternallyRestless said:


> But the thing is there _is_ a range that's considered "normal" and a point that's considered "abnormal." There is a normal pattern to social development, whether people like it or not.


A person is normal. Time passes and they stay the same. Now they are abnormal. Time waits for no man.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

arnie said:


> A person is normal. Time passes and they stay the same. Now they are abnormal. Time waits for no man.


If they already aren't capable of forming relationships then there is something abnormal about them.


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

preston2 said:


> Sorry if you've been burned that way.


I don't share of my own :b


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

KlLLERtofu said:


> Starss, I get what you are saying... I know you don't walk around saying I am so great and beautiful why don't I have a boyfriend lol people are not getting it Siiiigh I am in the same boat. In my mid 20s never had a boyfriend, yet I do get hit on often and I know I am not unattractive but I have a low self esteem and don't believe I am attractive when given a compliment... I am sacred a guy will be scared away like what the hell is wrong with you or look at me as a conquest which I do not want either. So puts me in this weird position. I also refuse to lower my standards. And when a really attractive and intelligent person does like me, I convince myself that it won't work, I kind of sabotage it. I just hate the look I get when I tell people I don't have a bf or haven't had many, which is a lie because I haven't had any... and there is no way I could just not tell a dude I've never had a bf because he'd figure it out the second he sees how inexperienced I am which is just as embarrassing.  Either way I can relate.


I know it especially suck when the guy is so hot I can barely look him in the eye. I also have low self esteem even though I know I'm beautiful.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Anxietyriddled said:


> I think some men would be a little off put for just a couple reasons. And of course some men with out much ethics would want to take advantage. You never had a boyfriend so you are probably developmentally challenged socially, especially since you say its not by choice but a mental barrier causing you intimacy issues. Also I think some men would feel bad for you because that's a long time to be alone, and you could have had years and years of good memories, fun, and sex but missed out.
> 
> People in general want a partner who is their equal, how can they find you an equally worthy partner if they feel bad for you? And the pressure to be a good first boyfriend and not let you down. *If it doesn't work out they might feel you might become clingy *or mentally obsessive unable to move on. How ever even with these issues, you should have no problem finding a man who can see past it if you make a good effort. Most men probably wouldn't care, maybe even think the less men have had you is better for them XD


I hope not all men think I would be clingy like that because I like my alone time too.


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## DarrellLicht (Mar 9, 2013)

To answer the original question. Not initially. There are worse things you can do besides lack experience.


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## Metalhead1014 (May 4, 2013)

i wouldn't be so turned off about. Heck, i never even had a girlfriend before so i'm not sure how other girls would react to me if i didn't have a girlfriend before.


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## To22 (Apr 6, 2012)

You're in the green light. Probably not a turn off to many men. I myself would be concerned about your ability to handle a serious relationship, but that's kinda irrelevant.



Rich19 said:


> I just think it's funny that your worried about something so insignificant but don't notice this gaping whole in your attractivness.
> Besides the only one who should give a rat's *** is you if your worried about what guys think of you


It's unfair to conclude that everyone who speaks of themselves in a positive light is either full of themselves or bragging, it's all about context. Sure, she used the holy word "beautiful" but still, I think you took it the wrong way.



Starss said:


> I know it especially suck when the guy is so hot I can barely look him in the eye. I also have low self esteem even though I know I'm beautiful.


Do you feel good looking i.e. do you think guys agree with you?

If so, what's wrong then? Why is your self-esteem low? Ask yourself.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

Metalhead1014 said:


> i wouldn't be so turned off about. Heck, i never even had a girlfriend before so i'm not sure how other girls would react to me if i didn't have a girlfriend before.


This once again proves my point that in some ways this board does not reflect reality. Of course an inexperienced person would be accepting of another inexperienced person. But in real life, very few people that you actually meet will still be inexperienced by the time they reach their 20s, and in most situations the inexperienced person is at a disadvantage. I'm no social butterfly, but I'd say that I spend time around my peers more than at least half the people on this board, and in real life someone in their 20s who never had a relationship is usually considered a weirdo.


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## Cyclonic (Oct 25, 2012)

Hypothetically speaking, since I'll likely never have a girlfriend, I would be fully accepting of someone who has no experience. I might even say that I'd prefer it, learning together as we go through. But alas, my thoughts are meaningless on the topic.


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## ThatGuy11200 (Sep 3, 2012)

Can I just ask, what does 'relationship experience' mean in practice anyway? Does it mean they are reliable? Does it mean they will never cheat? Does it mean they will never get jealous? What does it mean?


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## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

EternallyRestless said:


> This once again proves my point that in some ways this board does not reflect reality. Of course an inexperienced person would be accepting of another inexperienced person. But in real life, very few people that you actually meet will still be inexperienced by the time they reach their 20s, and in most situations the inexperienced person is at a disadvantage. I'm no social butterfly, but I'd say that I spend time around my peers more than at least half the people on this board, and in real life someone in their 20s who never had a relationship is usually considered a weirdo.


Really wish I didn't care about being perceived as a weirdo all the time, yet I do. That in turn makes me a weirdo cause I'm too reserved all the time which leads to people making baseless assumptions about me and poke fun at me for being an easy target.

Most people will condemn a person based on pure conjecture and gossip, never actually taking the time to do some interrogation of their own and decide for themselves to see if that person is worth their time or not. It's so frustrating trudging myself day by day, looking at all these happy people complaining about their bf/gf and then meanwhile they pass the time by gossiping about people they deem are beneath them only because they don't fit in that category they feel as the social norm.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Do you feel good looking i.e. do you think guys agree with you?

If so, what's wrong then? Why is your self-esteem low? Ask yourself.[/QUOTE]

Well men and women always tell me how beautiful I am. Men ask me out on dates, but I always reject them because I'm scared of what he'll think of me and I have nothing to talk about. Yes I always say I know I'm beautiful, but I have low self esteem that's because of my shyness and avoidant personalty.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Malek said:


> Really wish I didn't care about being perceived as a weirdo all the time, yet I do. That in turn makes me a weirdo cause I'm too reserved all the time which leads to people making baseless assumptions about me and poke fun at me for being an easy target.
> 
> Most people will condemn a person based on pure conjecture and gossip, never actually taking the time to do some interrogation of their own and decide for themselves to see if that person is worth their time or not. It's so frustrating trudging myself day by day, looking at all these happy people complaining about their bf/gf and then meanwhile they pass the time by gossiping about people they deem are beneath them only because they don't fit in that category they feel as the social norm.


Yes this makes me sad that people would think I'm weird because I've never had a boyfriend, that's why I act so conceited.


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## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

Starss said:


> Yes this makes me sad that people would think I'm weird because I've never had a boyfriend, that's why I act so conceited.


There's nothing wrong with loving yourself, I used to think I was ugly even though constantly throughout my entire life people have said otherwise. Looks certainly help gain some attention, yet when all is said and done, personality captures that attention.

Due to my low self-esteem I was too afraid to open up, thus forgoing countless opportunities. Also I'm too picky, I refuse to settle, as luck would have it, the only women who've ever displayed direct interest in me were harlots or the morbidly obese/stupid. (Before you all condemn me for being truthful here, lemme just say I'd like to think you wouldn't want to be with someone who could potentially give you an std or makes you nauseated/develop a headache. )


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## sir robbins (Apr 13, 2013)

```

```



TPower said:


> Nope, unless she's religious or not interested in sex.


if the OP is either of those, I want a date with her


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

sir robbins said:


> if the OP is either of those, I want a date with her


Wait you want a date with someone who is religious and not interested in sex?


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## Evo1114 (Dec 9, 2012)

I wouldn't have a problem with it at all. Especially knowing you suffer from anxiety problems. Our anxiety causes us to be labeled something we are not. Like '*******s', 'creeps', 'losers', 'stuck up', etc. It's stupid. Next time a guy asks you out, just put aside all those negative thoughts and say 'yes'! (As long as the guy seems like a reasonable, nice dude). You gotta start somewhere! Just go get some coffee or lunch or something and make up an excuse so that you have to be gone at a certain time so that there is a definite 'begin' and 'end' time. Baby steps I guess.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Malek said:


> There's nothing wrong with loving yourself, I used to think I was ugly even though constantly throughout my entire life people have said otherwise. Looks certainly help gain some attention, yet when all is said and done, personality captures that attention.
> 
> Due to my low self-esteem I was too afraid to open up, thus forgoing countless opportunities. Also I'm too picky, I refuse to settle, as luck would have it, the only women who've ever displayed direct interest in me were harlots or the morbidly obese/stupid. (Before you all condemn me for being truthful here, lemme just say I'd like to think you wouldn't want to be with someone who could potentially give you an std or makes you nauseated/develop a headache. )


I'm picky too. I wouldn't want to date someone who's fat, short, bald, ugly or old. People would call me a gold digger if I did date someone that looked like that.


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## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

Starss said:


> Wait you want a date with someone who is religious and not interested in sex?


I'm a lax Catholic, I find over religious people sometimes too suffocating, yet I also find people with no morals or values appalling. Also in regards to being interested in sex, if I ever do end up with a girl, doubt it, if she wanted to wait until marriage I'd be cool with that, if not then even better. Us virgins don't really have a cause to be too picky with our standards now do we? That saying beggars can't be choosers. It'd be impossible to find someone that meets the criteria of your long list of standards verbatim. Middle ground is the key or so they say. This is just what I think mind you, everyone has different opinions.


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## sir robbins (Apr 13, 2013)

Starss said:


> Wait you want a date with someone who is religious and not interested in sex?


I prefer spiritual to religious and I would only consider someone who did NOT have sex on the menu.... ever. It's a non-negotiable of mine


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

Evo1114 said:


> I wouldn't have a problem with it at all. Especially knowing you suffer from anxiety problems. Our anxiety causes us to be labeled something we are not. Like '*******s', 'creeps', 'losers', 'stuck up', etc. It's stupid. Next time a guy asks you out, just put aside all those negative thoughts and say 'yes'! (As long as the guy seems like a reasonable, nice dude). You gotta start somewhere! Just go get some coffee or lunch or something and make up an excuse so that you have to be gone at a certain time so that there is a definite 'begin' and 'end' time. Baby steps I guess.


The guy did ask to just get coffee and I still said no. I think I'm doomed.


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## Evo1114 (Dec 9, 2012)

Starss said:


> The guy did ask to just get coffee and I still said no. I think I'm doomed.


Well, next time just say yes! Like I said, make up an excuse so that it is not dragged out. Say he wants to meet at 6:00, say you have to get going by 7:00 for <whatever reason>. Just be truthful with any questions he asks and see what happens.


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## Elad (Dec 6, 2009)

If theres one thing I've learned from this forum its that most men are looking for a woman who MMMMF's every weekday and has a colourful sexual history.

^not really, you're pretty much the ideal for most men op. I say most because there will always be men who feel differently but most wont.

If you don't make it a big deal, they wont make it a big deal. It really is that simple.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

Elad said:


> If you don't make it a big deal, they wont make it a big deal. It really is that simple.


Not necessarily. Whether she makes a big deal about it or not, 28 and never had a relationship sends up red flags in a lot of people's minds.


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

EternallyRestless said:


> Not necessarily. Whether she makes a big deal about it or not, 28 and never had a relationship sends up red flags in a lot of people's minds.


I'm 27, not 28.


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## Whatev (Feb 6, 2012)

Depends on the guy. If that's the reason why a guy is turned off by you then he's doing you a favor. Personally I could care less as long as we get along, and enjoy each others time together. All that other trivial stuff doesn't matter.


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## JohnWalnut (May 2, 2012)

Yes, some will. Likewise, some guys will be turned off by women who had a certain number of boyfriends. It works both ways.


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## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

Starss said:


> Yes this makes me sad that people would think I'm weird because I've never had a boyfriend


You're essentially rejecting people because you don't like yourself and think someone's bad if they like you. I would recommend looking into fixing that through Googling and/or reading books and/or therapy about the subject; that seems the lynchpin to your aversion to date so far and it'll forever follow you around otherwise.


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## harrison (Apr 14, 2012)

SnowFlakesFire said:


> If you are willing to have sex with them you can be 5 legged , 3 eyed monster under ground without any human contacts ever.


Bingo!


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

preston2 said:


> You're essentially rejecting people because you don't like yourself *and think someone's bad if they like you*. I would recommend looking into fixing that through Googling and/or reading books and/or therapy about the subject; that seems the lynchpin to your aversion to date so far and it'll forever follow you around otherwise.


Huh I never said I think someone is bad if they like me.


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## lightningstorm (Oct 10, 2012)

Speaking of me, I would be turned on, not off if a girl never had a boyfriend. I never had a girlfriend either. I am more attracted to girls who had always been single compared to girls who had been in a few relationships. It doesnt matter if you never had a bf, doesnt make you a terrible girl, or wouldnt make you a terrible gf. It means that you haven't found the man of your type. Whats important is if two ppl are similar to each other and click. Focus on quality not quantity.


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## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

Starss said:


> Huh I never said I think someone is bad if they like me.


Forgive me, I'm psychoanalyzing  I'm speculating that since you admittedly see yourself in a negative light that you pervasively look down on others who see you positively. Could be wrong. Do you have problems reciprocating with generally everyone who's friendly to you, or is it just these guys?


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## Starss (Apr 27, 2013)

preston2 said:


> Forgive me, I'm psychoanalyzing  I'm speculating that since you admittedly see yourself in a negative light that you pervasively look down on others who see you positively. Could be wrong. Do you have problems reciprocating with generally everyone who's friendly to you, or is it just these guys?


No I'm scared of guys that are attractive because I'm worried of what he'll think of me.


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## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

Starss said:


> No I'm scared of guys that are attractive because I'm worried of what he'll think of me.


The ones that ask you out clearly like something about you. Since you say you're scared of not being a good conversationalist, what would make a pleasant date for you?


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## Malek (Oct 4, 2012)

lightningstorm said:


> Speaking of me, I would be turned on, not off if a girl never had a boyfriend. I never had a girlfriend either. I am more attracted to girls who had always been single compared to girls who had been in a few relationships. It doesnt matter if you never had a bf, doesnt make you a terrible girl, or wouldnt make you a terrible gf. It means that you haven't found the man of your type. Whats important is if two ppl are similar to each other and click. Focus on quality not quantity.


I think most mature men & women would feel this way, at least I'd hope so.

Yet I've yet to talk to a girl in real life with the same sentiments. Eventually she finds out and thinks there's something wrong with me, because there is! Right then and there I'm written off as some weirdo freak and at best jotted down as simply a friend in her mental notebook. Sorry for sounding bitter, but I'm a little jaded and have been friend zoned more times can I can even recall. I'm aware most people aren't like this, I just think I have horrible luck with finding worthwhile people in real life. It doesn't help that I usually wait for people to approach me first obviously, so I've no right to complain. All I can do is put my best self out there and pray I get lucky things actually fall into place for once, as frustrating as that sounds.


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## KlLLERtofu (May 5, 2013)

Starss said:


> I know it especially suck when the guy is so hot I can barely look him in the eye. I also have low self esteem even though I know I'm beautiful.


Exactly! I had this gooorgeous guy like me, but I was like the second he finds out I have never had a bf he is going to run or tell everyone which would mortify me! We had mutual friends etc. He would always ask for us to hang out when I was in town and I would never tell him I was in town and when he would run in to me he would look so disappointed that I did not tell him... but I knew if we hung out one on one he would ask questions about my love life and try to make moves like a normal 20 something year old, all while I would be nervous and rejecting his come ons because I have no clue what the **** I am doing. It's so frustrating. I have chances now and then but like I said I sabotage them...


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

nubly said:


> I don't know. I wouldn't get in a serious relationship with someone that doesn't have any experience.


Why not?


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## callalilly26 (Jun 13, 2012)

There's nothing wrong with that. I've dated many guys but I'm in my late 20s and I'm finally in my first real relationship. The others didn't count. So there's nothing wrong with it whatsoever  If the person really cares for you, then that shouldn't matter...


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## Jessop (Mar 29, 2013)

You're lucky that your a girl and not a guy. It doesn't bother guys in the slightest that you haven't had a boyfriend. In fact if anything it is beneficial. 

Being a guy, however, in the same situation is the exact opposite. It's the same reason why girls who have had many sexual partners get labelled ****s whilst men of the same disposition are great in both sexes eyes.


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## TheTraveler (Jan 31, 2013)

mezzoforte said:


> Why not?


Cause they would lack the knowledge of how to handle a serious relationship. They wouldn't know what they want out of one. Have you noticed that the more people you date, the more certain you of the things you want your person to encompass? For example, you date the bad boy and get over him, you get the hobo and find out that you don't want to lug his *** around etc. A girl who has no experience will not know what she wants. Uncertainty is a bad thing when it comes to a serious relationship. Essentially she has just been shown a world of endless options. She hasn't tasted all the kinds of ice cream, why would she settle for the first one? She won't. She may stay for a bit but she will leave. It is just a matter of time.


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## EternallyRestless (Jul 19, 2011)

TheTraveler said:


> Cause they would lack the knowledge of how to handle a serious relationship. They wouldn't know what they want out of one. Have you noticed that the more people you date, the more certain you of the things you want your person to encompass? For example, you date the bad boy and get over him, you get the hobo and find out that you don't want to lug his *** around etc. A girl who has no experience will not know what she wants. Uncertainty is a bad thing when it comes to a serious relationship. Essentially she has just been shown a world of endless options. She hasn't tasted all the kinds of ice cream, why would she settle for the first one? She won't. She may stay for a bit but she will leave. It is just a matter of time.


Very good point. It doesn't matter how old you are, if you haven't had a relationship you are immature in that respect.


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## Alienated (Apr 17, 2013)

I would only worry if you had one, but he disappeared under mysterious circumstances , and you were still under investigation.


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## meepie (Jun 20, 2010)

Charmander said:


> She has an overinflated ego because she thinks she looks beautiful and has a nice body? I'd rather people feel good about themselves than constantly think of themselves as ugly.


I agree. People on this forum complain if someone posts an "I am ugly" thread. You can't make people happy. If you think you're ugly you get criticized for it, and if you think you look good you get criticized for being conceited(persumably due to the criticizer's own lack of self-confidence [projecting]). Positivity is not allowed cuz the criteria is you have to be utterly miserable in every aspect of your life to have social anxiety. :|


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## CheezusCrust (May 23, 2013)

Starss said:


> I'm in my late 20's and never had a boyfriend and really embarrassed by this. It makes it worse because I know I'm beautiful and have a nice body, but I have bad anxiety when it comes to men and I'm afraid to open up and let them in my life because I'm afraid of what he'll think of me.


No way. I think it's ridiculous when anyone of either sex thinks this way.


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## Eazi (Mar 27, 2013)

Nah they just wanna hit.


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## TicklemeRingo (Jan 11, 2013)

Wouldn't matter to me in the slightest.

A relationship is not a job interview. You're not being scored against some arbitrary checklist. If I like you then I like you. I couldn't care less if you've been in dozens of relationships or none. The relationship we would have would succeed or fail for it's own reasons, and because of the people we are in the present, not the past.

Its frustrating reading this thread because no matter how many people say it wouldn't matter to them, there are some people who simply refuse to believe anything that doesn't fit their preconceived notions.

Anxiety disorders are built on assumptions, yet so many on this website refuse to entertain the idea that their assumptions about themselves and others might not be entirely accurate.

F*cks sake!

end of rant


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## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

No


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## TrueColor (Apr 21, 2013)

Alienated said:


> I would only worry if you had one, but he disappeared under mysterious circumstances , and you were still under investigation.


Like this response 

.


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## Alluring prince (Apr 1, 2011)

KlLLERtofu said:


> Exactly! I had this gooorgeous guy like me, but I was like the second he finds out I have never had a bf he is going to run or tell everyone which would mortify me! We had mutual friends etc. He would always ask for us to hang out when I was in town and I would never tell him I was in town and when he would run in to me he would look so disappointed that I did not tell him... but I knew if we hung out one on one he would ask questions about my love life and try to make moves like a normal 20 something year old, all while I would be nervous and rejecting his come ons because I have no clue what the **** I am doing. It's so frustrating. I have chances now and then but like I said I sabotage them...


(1) Read through this thread.
(2) Feel assured :-]



Jessop said:


> You're lucky that your a girl and not a guy. It doesn't bother guys in the slightest that you haven't had a boyfriend. In fact if anything it is beneficial.
> 
> Being a guy, however, in the same situation is the exact opposite. It's the same reason why girls who have had many sexual partners get labelled ****s whilst men of the same disposition are great in both sexes eyes.


It's a different set of pros and cons, yeah.



TheTraveler said:


> Cause they would lack the knowledge of how to handle a serious relationship. They wouldn't know what they want out of one. Have you noticed that the more people you date, the more certain you of the things you want your person to encompass? For example, you date the bad boy and get over him, you get the hobo and find out that you don't want to lug his *** around etc. A girl who has no experience will not know what she wants. Uncertainty is a bad thing when it comes to a serious relationship. Essentially she has just been shown a world of endless options. She hasn't tasted all the kinds of ice cream, why would she settle for the first one? She won't. She may stay for a bit but she will leave. It is just a matter of time.


A man's reliance on intuition and the innocence appeal will usually override that in this circumstance. Also see my other posts in this thread.


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## NightWingLikeABoss (Sep 11, 2011)

I would love a girlfriend that's never had a boyfriend, for a variety of reasons, but mostly, there's less room for jealousy and resentment, and there's less baggage. You don't have to pay for another guy's dickish behaviour.


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