# Anybody have aunts/uncles/cousins or other close relatives they never met?



## justapatheticperson (Jun 16, 2014)

My dad's side of the family wants nothing to do with me and my parents. It makes me sad. I only saw my grandfather,step-grandmother and step-cousin once when I was 7 (and once or twice when I was a baby). I have an aunt, my dad's sister, and two cousins, who I never met.

Those two cousins I recently spoke to for the first time on facebook, because my grandfather told them I existed pretty much (they didn't even KNOW THEY HAD A COUSIN on that side of the family. I knew about them though). When I told my dad about this he went on about how he didn't want me to speak to them, don't get involved with them blah blah blah but I really wanted to know them so I talked to one (the other added me but has never messaged me). 

My uncle (dad's sister's husband) died in 2002 I think. I didn't know he died until 2006, when my dad googled him. We were shocked because he was pretty young... but the fact that we didn't even know until this is just nuts.

I want to meet my family so bad, but they hate me just because I am my dad's daughter. It is ****ed up and it makes me very sad. It had something to do with my dad and uncle having some business together that fell apart back in the 80s (which was the last time my dad and his sister spoke). My dad's sister was the one who decided to cut ties, and the rest of the family sided with her. 

I also have a step uncle (that my dad told me was gay, didn't even tell his name), and possibly other step uncles\aunts but my dad refuses to tell me anything about them, or how many I have. Not as interested in meeting them (want to mainly meet aunt/cousins) but I am curious to at least know their names or how many I have. I met the daughter of one of them.

I want to meet this side of the family at least once before I die, but I know it will never happen. My cousins live pretty close, and even though I spoke one on facebook, he doesn't seem to want to meet me. (as in he took a picture IN MY TOWN 5 MINUTES FROM MY HOUSE) and I messaged him saying lets meet and he said maybe another time. -_- They only live an hour away too, closer than any of the cousins I actually talk to. 

Does anyone else have crazy family that wants nothing to do with them? I have met nobody who has never met their aunt... it came off as literally NORMAL to me until I realized other people speak to both sides of their family.


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## LivetoRead (Jun 23, 2014)

*I can Relate!*

*Oh boy can I relate. *My mothers sisters and brothers wouldn't talk to her for a long time. When she was a young girl they all decided she was a traitor to there mother because when their parents divorced she went to live with her father and new wife. What could she do she was the last of 13 kids and there mother had pretty much gone crazy by then from what I have been told. Anyone would go crazy I think having 13 kids and she had to put up with my grandfather who was a womanizer. 
So fast forward to when she grew up and I was born we were never invited to any family get togethers and we were shuned because my mom was divorced which was a bad thing back then. We were treated like trash and made to think we weren't good enough.

Well my mom is a strong woman and a forgiving woman so as time went by she would reach out to them and keep in touch. As time went by most of the family excepted us back but when we visited I would feel like we still weren't good enough. So you can imagine my surprise and discuss when at a family picnic one of my uncles pulls out a photo album and shows some pictures of a camping trip that he had arranged for all of them in the mountains, He says to me "hey do you remember this trip I took you all on and I was furious, but my sister who doesn't take any sh*t says "NO because we weren't invited."

My mom is still the one in the family who keeps in touch with most of her siblings and she is the one who most of my cousins like the best out of all of the aunts and uncles. They love her no kidding, she is a real cool aunt, she was a tough mom but she really tried to make my sister and I feel special.

So keep trying if you feel the need to don't give up unless the hurt is to much; you could be the one that brings everyone together.


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## justapatheticperson (Jun 16, 2014)

LivetoRead said:


> *Oh boy can I relate. *My mothers sisters and brothers wouldn't talk to her for a long time. When she was a young girl they all decided she was a traitor to there mother because when their parents divorced she went to live with her father and new wife. What could she do she was the last of 13 kids and there mother had pretty much gone crazy by then from what I have been told. Anyone would go crazy I think having 13 kids and she had to put up with my grandfather who was a womanizer.
> So fast forward to when she grew up and I was born we were never invited to any family get togethers and we were shuned because my mom was divorced which was a bad thing back then. We were treated like trash and made to think we weren't good enough.
> 
> Well my mom is a strong woman and a forgiving woman so as time went by she would reach out to them and keep in touch. As time went by most of the family excepted us back but when we visited I would feel like we still weren't good enough. So you can imagine my surprise and discuss when at a family picnic one of my uncles pulls out a photo album and shows some pictures of a camping trip that he had arranged for all of them in the mountains, He says to me "hey do you remember this trip I took you all on and I was furious, but my sister who doesn't take any sh*t says "NO because we weren't invited."
> ...


Wow... sorry to hear all of that, but I am glad in the end you ended up talking to them. 

The problem with me is that I don't know my aunt. Only my mom and dad know her, so I would feel awkward to initiate any sort of contact with her because she hates me not even knowing me. Oh, and my dad hates her too. My cousins are my best bet, but as I said I asked one to hang out and he seemed uninterested. I think the only TINY possibility of meeting them is if we are even invited to my grandfather's funeral, whenever that is.  Thank you though... I can hope for the best! It worked for you maybe it can eventually work for me.


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## Andras96 (Mar 28, 2014)

Yep, my father's family wanted nothing to do with me since the day I was conceived. Why? Because they're a bunch of bigoted, prejudiced pricks, and I happened to be biracial. And it's such a _WONDER_ to my parents why I have so many issues. But hey, that's just me ruminating again as my therapist would put it. :clap


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## Bikini Condom (Sep 10, 2013)

Lol dude I have over 87 cousins and only met 32 of them.


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## SuperSaiyanGod (Jan 21, 2014)

I have cousins that i have never met. My family isn't close [on either side].


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

I have no connection with my father's side. Only recently learned I have aunts and an uncle on my mother's side, have precious little contact with my extended family.


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## consciousnessrevisited (Jul 12, 2014)

I can so relate, I have a ton of these!


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## s0mebody (Mar 30, 2013)

Lol. Before last month, I only knew one cousin and I knew about two aunts by name only. But now I've visited some of them and got to know them. They kept on asking me about our other relatives and I say I dont know them and they're like "you dont know them? Who are you". I never really got to know my relatives. Probably because of lack of being together. I dont even know my grandparents! I know I've attended two funerals but I dont remembwr their names!!


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## Kinokocha (Jun 28, 2014)

I don't know anything about my mother's family. She and my father eloped and she has never been back to Thailand since then. It might be for the best though, her family was not kind to her to begin with. I still wonder about them regardless. I really only know my father's side of the family through Facebook lol. I guess that's what happens when you like across the country.


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