# Ostracism/Family Scapegoat



## Worthless1 (Mar 20, 2015)

I have been ostracized by my dysfunctional family. To give a brief history, I grew up in an emotionally and physically abusive home. Escaped at age 18 and married an abusive man. Divorce. Worked dead end jobs as well as I could with my anxiety problems. Married again, to yet another abuser. 1 child. Nervous breakdown. Marriage lasted 2 years. Married again, 1 child. Man not abusive physically, but emotionally distant and narcissistic. More problems with severe depression and anxiety. I was a good mother, didn't beat my kids, didn't terrorize them mentally, I bent over backwards to make them happy. Man tired of my problems. Divorce after 15 years. I have never had any friends, and my lovely parents have not been supportive. Now, my children blame me for all of their problems, conveniently ignoring the fact that I did the best I could in spite of the fact that I live with crippling anxiety and depression. My kids have gone over to my parents' side. My parents actively sabotage my relationship with my children. My parents scapegoat me, tell me I am lying about their abuse of me, and just want to forget I exist, and would be happy if my kids would forget, too. My kids are now 26 and 18. 

This is killing me. I have nobody to speak for me, I am tired of being blamed for everyone else's problems. Everyone else is cozy and happy together in their little group, and I am left on the outside, as usual. I have tried as much as humanly possible to get through to my kids, to apologize for any suffering my problems may have caused them. It all falls on deaf ears. It seems that I am dead to my entire family. My back-stabbing mother has even turned other relatives against me, because I'm not a "conservative" Republican and I'm not a Jesus freak, like the rest of the family. 

I'm thinking the best bet is to forget I have a family, because my family sure has forgotten me.


----------

