# Do you find it hard to talk to your therapist?



## Ricebunnyx3 (Sep 1, 2010)

I want to see one, but I feel like I won't be able to say anything or tell her anything. These things make me feel pathetic and I'd feel to embarrassed to tell her how I feel. How long did it take you to open up? Why did you keep going and did/does therapy actually help? Like I don't want to go to therapy but then still be the same... How does it help, how does it work? I have seen a therapist before for a different reason and it never helped, but I was not willing then and therapy was forced on me, so I guess I already have a negative view of therapy... but I really want to be a different person and I know not doing anything about it isn't going to help either.


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## polkaspot (Oct 30, 2012)

Some days it's harder for me than others.

One thing that really helps me is to remember that they're legally obligated to keep anything I say just between us, and to view them as something outside of my life. Still, I worry that they're going to judge me or pity me, which can make it hard to open up or admit to things.

A lot of it is also finding the right therapist, someone with a personality you "click" with.

And it does get easier with time.


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## AbsenceOfSound (Nov 29, 2011)

In my experience, therapy works best when you can be completely open and hold nothing back. It usually takes me about 4-5 months of therapy before I can get to that level of comfort .... but I'm sure it's different for everyone.

When I was first starting therapy, I read a lot of blog entries from In Therapy. A psychologist writes the blog, and he tries to "demystify" the therapy process. It answered a lot of questions for me. Link below:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-therapy

Best of luck to you!


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## Ricebunnyx3 (Sep 1, 2010)

polkaspot said:


> Some days it's harder for me than others.
> 
> One thing that really helps me is to remember that they're legally obligated to keep anything I say just between us, and to view them as something outside of my life. Still, I worry that they're going to judge me or pity me, which can make it hard to open up or admit to things.
> 
> ...


Ahhh, I see. The therapist I want to see is a school therapist because they are free so Idk if I'll have much freedom. I finally have insurance again, but I still would not like to pay the co pay every session.



AbsenceOfSound said:


> In my experience, therapy works best when you can be completely open and hold nothing back. It usually takes me about 4-5 months of therapy before I can get to that level of comfort .... but I'm sure it's different for everyone.
> 
> When I was first starting therapy, I read a lot of blog entries from In Therapy. A psychologist writes the blog, and he tries to "demystify" the therapy process. It answered a lot of questions for me. Link below:
> 
> ...


Yeah, I think it would work if you don't keep anything from the therapist or else how can they help you if you just lie to them... still I would still feel pathetic talking to them about my problems even if they've heard them before... although I feel like a "special case" sometimes. I will definitely look into that blog, thanks!


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## Wildman (Apr 9, 2011)

Ricebunnyx3 said:


> Ahhh, I see. The therapist I want to see is a school therapist because they are free so Idk if I'll have much freedom. I finally have insurance again, but I still would not like to pay the co pay every session.
> 
> Yeah, I think it would work if you don't keep anything from the therapist or else how can they help you if you just lie to them... still I would still feel pathetic talking to them about my problems even if they've heard them before... although I feel like a "special case" sometimes. I will definitely look into that blog, thanks!


Interestingly, I didn't find it too difficult to be open with the school counselor I saw. I think part of it is that I lucked out and gotten a really good one that I felt comfortable with. Something about the atmosphere and knowing that it's confidential helped me talk about myself a LOT more than I have with anyone, ever. The sad thing was that it was a very small number of sessions.


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## Ricebunnyx3 (Sep 1, 2010)

Wildman said:


> Interestingly, I didn't find it too difficult to be open with the school counselor I saw. I think part of it is that I lucked out and gotten a really good one that I felt comfortable with. Something about the atmosphere and knowing that it's confidential helped me talk about myself a LOT more than I have with anyone, ever. The sad thing was that it was a very small number of sessions.


Really? That kind of gives me hope. But I'm somewhat scared to see the school counselor because of the waiting room. I heard this girl talking about how she sees the counselor there and I'd be so embarrassed to see her in the waiting room there (we're not friends but she's always in the office that I work in w/ her friends). Yeah, but I think I will see the therapist (I've said this about 50 times now, and still haven't done it but I'm going to try and force myself... finals start friday and there's no school tomorrow and then there's winter vacation giving me more incentive to put off making an appointment)


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## polkaspot (Oct 30, 2012)

Ricebunnyx3 said:


> Ahhh, I see. The therapist I want to see is a school therapist because they are free so Idk if I'll have much freedom. I finally have insurance again, but I still would not like to pay the co pay every session.


Yeah, right now I'm seeing a psychologist through my college so it's free. Depending on the size of the school they might have more than one (I'm guessing from your age that you're not in high school anymore). If so, you can ask to see someone else if you don't think the first will work out after a few sessions.


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## arnie (Jan 24, 2012)

I hope not. Does anyone else feel like they self-censor themselves to make people like them more?


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## noiseyy (Dec 16, 2013)

I've seen a number of different therapists/counselors, and the ones I find least helpful were those who I didn't feel comfortable opening up to. So don't feel bad if you find a therapist and don't click, it can take a while to find someone you match up with. Personally I get along best with therapists who are talkative/highly engaging because I usually don't know what to say and if they're not saying anything and I'm not saying anything it ends up being awkward and pointless.


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## Testsubject (Nov 25, 2013)

Oh yes. I find it extremely hard to open up to my psychologist, but I have no issue with my psychiatrist. It has to be an appearance thing. My Psychologist is mid 30s but she is extremely good looking. My psychiatrist is late 50s and not attractive, to me at least. My 2 hour sessions with my psychologist are always rough. So much I want to say, but my anxiety goes ssj3 when around females I find attractive. I just about die when she attempts to ask me about my sex life.


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