# Ace's Super Long List of Goals



## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

I started making a list of goals last week. I thought the list was quite lengthy, and it didn't fit in the "start your day here" thread because these goals are long term rather than for just one day. And it's always nice to have a backup of my goal list somewhere.

Anyway, I'll be adding more whenever I get ideas, but for now:

*Ace's Goals/Lifestyle Changes*

Upload one track of IDTICHY each day to tumblr complete with hyperlink download.

Keep a complete sketchbook. No excuses. One page a day minimum. Draw lightly. Conserve space. Decorate and scrapbook it to professionalism.

Don't half *** songs. Write down all structural notes. Practice riffs until perfected, over multiple days.

Revise daily and always do homework a day before it is due at least.

Learn how to produce electronic music using a free program and sound library.

Go over the basics of:
-biology
-american history
-world history/ancient civilizations
-law
-philosophy
-common disorders/diseases
-pharmecuticals
-relevant social issues

Verse myself daily with current events and social issues. Form full opinions. Discuss.

Maintain my diet and appearance in accordance to belief system and optimal health.

Chronicle events briefly and artistically in writing, and then spiral into "deep writes."

Remember to be myself. Of course there are some amazing people out there who are younger and excel a thousand fold at all the same interests you have; regardless you must seek value rather than maximum success. Don't strive to become your role models out of jealousy, but rather let yourself become uniquely amazing in your own time.

Writing ideas:

-Music critiques (specific genres, or individual tracks, artists)

-Music historically, and its path of evolution and cultural diversity

-Music and its roles (socially, culturally, identity, altruism)

-Comparing and contrasting the arts (dance, music, literature, visual arts, film, animation, hands-on crafts, fashion) and their respective communities, their main unifying quality in the human experience

-Describe the ideal world (goverment, healthcare, social rules, disciplinary action, wealth distribution, censorship, education, market, or lack thereof) (think social issues, healthy choices, consent, egalitarian, promotion of empathy, community, intellect, and creativity)

-Autism Spectrum Disorders: condensed overview (symptoms, effects on quality or rather cognitive perspective of life, speculating biological origins, diverse manifestations)

-Debunking stereotype/label culture (history of behaviour, subleties, its acceptance and near invisibile hand in society, what's funny and what is ethically incorrect, political correctness, speculations on origin....inherent or developed in the avg. individual?)

-Gender complexities: condensed overview (identity list, debating necessity for labeled identities, how genitalia and hormonal levels and sexual dimorphism ever seemingly equated socially to gender, public ignorance + "anti"-laws + aggression, coping, how identities are formed and whether there ever is an "aha" moment)

-Depression: overview + personal account (chemical/biological roots, types of depression, treatments and success rates for respective types, depression vs. suicide, unemployment, isolation, lonliness, symptoms, methods of coping, natural remedies?, slowly aching--->when it hits you--->meltdown--->main period of demotivation--->"coming out" or realizing it yourself, even--->getting out of the slump, personal motivational blurb)

-List of mental disorders: encyclopedic overview


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

Be humble. You're not great. Don't show off unless asked. Wait until you have established yourself enough -- a wide audience of mostly positive reviews and some financial proof -- before promoting without request. 

Be well rounded. Know a little about a lot -- at least basic concepts enough to have a small banter without being absolutely clueless. But remember to excel at some talents. This is how you grab people. Otherwise you will simply mesh, another drop in the ocean winking out with the waves. It's a delicate balancing act.

Vary sentence structure. Trivial, perhaps, but it has a great overall effect. Be artistic and loose with some sentences. Experiment outside of grammar and objectivity. Revel in the nostalgia of days you wrote flowing, flowery, artistic sentences in fictional prose. Now try applying this art to hard, academic prose, when it does not obstruct meaning. It's a great way to show passion for academia without the awkward, dry bluntness, and can be a tool of persuasion among the artistic crowd.

It's okay to use slang. Use it sparingly, though. You are forgetting the vast beauty of language, sacrificing it for the narrow selection of modern equivalents in turn for fleeting humor and social acceptance. Fulfill your family's expectations of a wide, cultured vocabulary. Consume new words with a voracious, insatiable hunger to learn and express.

Read. Read colorful books. Academia is fun, but really there is not much to learn in terms of the art of language in nonfiction, lest it be the odd scientific term here or there. Classics can be off-putting, associated with snobbery and elitist hipsters at their finest -- but you have to stop being so stubborn and elitist yourself and read some goddamn classics. Thoreau sounds like a nice start.

Culture yourself in more than just fandom arts and a few odd modern contemporary creators. Bathe in the cultural canopies of past centuries. Drink in every last drop. Analyze, dissect how these "greats" have come to their success -- what was it that they all had in common? You have enough motivation, ideas, thoughts ringing in your head all the year long. The issue is technical skill and diversity of form. Stop being a one trick pony.

Stop updating on social sites, just refreshing the page, waiting for comments and likes. Instead, spend that time further practicing/honing the skills you want to show off so gratuitously on these sites. Praise is an after-effect, and a gladly embraced one, but not the primary goal. The goal is getting better for personal satisfaction. Bask in the praise only when you have reached a point of full mastery.

Learn how to read musical notes. It's useful, and rather pathetic that you still don't know how. Being able to write and record music is nice, but it makes you look incredibly dumb and uneducated not to be able to read what you write. That's like being able to speak but not write. How horrifically inconvenient for the rest of the masses who need speech inscribed somewhere for clarity's sake (not that anyone cares about the content of which you speak, haha, but that is another issue entirely).

Master the art of debate. It is a confusing art indeed -- many have insulted your poorly constructed arguments. The points are there; it is just a lack of technical skill for persausive rhetoric. Practice debating topics online.

Enough with the correspondence. In the end, if your friends/acquaintances really do like you and think of you as a companion, time and frequency of interaction will not change this opinion. You shouldn't have to entertain friends constantly in order to keep them. Focus on relevant events first and foremost. 

Dabble in more genres. You state that every genre has its merit, and you judge a composition's quality without discriminating according to its genre, but do you perform music of these many genres? So far you just fall under the general rock, rap, electronic, indie, ambient, broadway, and singer/songwriter styles. There needs to be diversity. You can have favorite genres, but varying styles is beneficial both in keeping interest of long time listeners and representing the belief that a "book shouldn't be judged by its cover."

Practice ear-playing more. 
You retreat too often to writing your own music in solitude, completely shut out from the wonders of appreciating and learning from others' works. Really delve into covering songs, and try to keep as true to the original as possible, just for private learning experiences. It can really help in dissecting and understanding the elements of certain less common genres and musical elements. 

Diversify your palette. Experiment in foreign mediums and artistic styles; perhaps you may come to like one. Stipple, crosshatch, contour, pure lineart, stylized, text/font, logos, illustration, recolors, calligraphy, art nuveau, loose gesture, highly rendered, abstract, inverse, etching, burning. Acrylic, oil, watercolour, inks, colored pencils, watercolour pencils, clay, various pencil sizes, scratchboard, canvas, watercolour pad, newspaper, tile, wood, mural wall, glass, trinkets, beads, food. 

Try different moods. Your style primarily switches between cute, dark, and neutral. How about the rest of the spectrum: Jovial, hyper, content, menacing, enraged, friendly, hesitant, eery, tense, jealous, nervous, foreboding, lethargic...

Maths are your weakness. Harness your fear of numbers. Actively seek out ways to implement numbers in your daily life, until it becomes second nature to calculate simple functions/equations effortlessly in your head. 
Build further upon abstract reasoning skills, as well.

Fix your ****ed up memory. You may have been diagnosed with short term memory, but it doesn't mean that you're irrevocably senile for every trivial event or fact that enters your brain. Strengthen whatever memory skill you have left. Drill it into your mind. Don't rely on sticky notes or schedules. Practice memorizing lists and texts by rote and eidetic memory, until you can recall information at the snap of a finger.

Write and mull over the lyrics. It's difficult to restrain that trigger finger on the microphone, feverishly tapping your foot to the infectious loop of a work in progress, but 
it's worth it -- most of your lyrics turn out quite cheesy and odd...and not odd in the good way, sometimes. You're a writer and pride yourself on your skills, attempting to make a comeback after years of abstaining from creative writing. Act like it and put that wordsmithery to use. Especially avoid that second person sh!t: "You, you you." And "I, I, I." Some of the best songs do not even refer to a person or consistent perspective. They simply rely on pure lyrical genius to describe the visceral and abstract with irresistable concision and passion. Those perfect words and syllables, the ch ch ch and sh and uh and oh and rrr's layered on top of the perfect note/sequence. Those small moments of lyrical genius and musical mastery in harmony are what can shoot a song to viral popularity.


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

I realize this is longer it looked when I wrote it on Notepad. And I sound like a crazy person giving myself a pep talk. O_O


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## Joe (May 18, 2010)

I hope you stick to this Alex!


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

Thanks, Joe, but so far it's not turning out well. Too demotivated. Just sad and tired all of the time.


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## tennislover84 (May 14, 2010)

Wow, I've got a huge list of goals, just like this. Mine is internal though, as I've never written everything down like this, but it still tortures me every day.

Perhaps you could add another point, which would be that *it's a success to work on just one of these things, per day/week/month/whatever*.  If you try to achieve all of your goals at the same time, you're bound to feel like you've failed. No wonder you feel demotivated, if you're concentrating on what you haven't done, or *should* have done (only according to your own harsh expectations.) Everybody's list of what they haven't done is going to be much bigger than their achievements.

If you set yourself a single target, easily within reach, hopefully you'll feel motivated by a more tangible sense of progress. The target might be simply to *do* one thing from your list, and *not* be successful at it... just do it! You can reframe "success" as something that's easily achievable.

Hope you don't mind me chipping in with a suggestion, but I recognise so much of myself in what you've written. Good luck with whatever you want to do. :clap


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## xriverr (Dec 22, 2013)

Wow, that a huge list. If I were you, I would break things down into parts, have the main goal and subgoals and of course, have a deadline for everything  Either that or focus mainly on one or two of your goals. That's a lot of things to work on. 

One thing you could do is put all your goals in a jar. so when you feel demotivated, draw a slip of paper and put all your energy into what's written down. That way, you can focus on one thing without having to worry about all the other goals you have in mind.


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## Joe (May 18, 2010)

AceEmoKid said:


> Thanks, Joe, but so far it's not turning out well. Too demotivated. Just sad and tired all of the time.


yeah i know what you mean, its so hard to do anything when everything fels hopleless, ill buy a plane ticket to america and give you moral support (unless im a poor cheerleader, if so then i am sorry)
Yeah I know what you mean, it's so freaking hard to do anything when it feels so hopeless and you have no one to support you while going through it all. I'll buy a plane ticket to America if you need the moral support (I do not rate my cheering abilities though).

A-L-E-X go ALEX!


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

shiori said:


> Wow... Now that is a list of goals! I didn't read all of it but I think this is great. There are some goals on here that I've been thinking about trying to do too, like being more well-rounded. Keep at it but try not to overwhelm yourself, maybe it would be easier to focus on a few at a time


Haha, I do have a tendency to "go big or go home...."

Becoming more well-rounded is a great goal, but a big one, even taken alone -- it's essentially becoming efficient at every discipline you want to tackle. That's a ton of work; definitely a long term goal. I wish you luck. :yes



tennislover84 said:


> Wow, I've got a huge list of goals, just like this. Mine is internal though, as I've never written everything down like this, but it still tortures me every day.
> 
> Perhaps you could add another point, which would be that *it's a success to work on just one of these things, per day/week/month/whatever*.  If you try to achieve all of your goals at the same time, you're bound to feel like you've failed. No wonder you feel demotivated, if you're concentrating on what you haven't done, or *should* have done (only according to your own harsh expectations.) Everybody's list of what they haven't done is going to be much bigger than their achievements.
> 
> ...


I really appreciate your perspective. I tend to be really harsh on myself, most likely where a lot of my depression and anxiety comes from -- strict boundaries and expectations I've set for myself. I can be extremely ambitious, but in doing so, I set myself up from the impossible. So thanks for sort of "bringing me back down to earth" with the suggestion about focusing on tangible goals, one at a time.

Haha, it was beginning to become torturous to me carrying around all that extra baggage of my mind, which is why I finally purged this whole list. As a result, a lot of self-criticism was vented, as you pointed out. Got a little off track as to what a goal list really is.



xriverr said:


> Wow, that a huge list. If I were you, I would break things down into parts, have the main goal and subgoals and of course, have a deadline for everything  Either that or focus mainly on one or two of your goals. That's a lot of things to work on.
> 
> One thing you could do is put all your goals in a jar. so when you feel demotivated, draw a slip of paper and put all your energy into what's written down. That way, you can focus on one thing without having to worry about all the other goals you have in mind.


Sounds like a good idea to break this list down into bite-sized chunks. I've already got a head start on some of these, with tangible progress. So far just the first goal about uploading my music to tumblr and another brainstorming/researching for my essay about autism spectrum disorders.

Hmm, the jar sounds interesting as an idea, but I'm not quite sure how I would get to the goal presented when feeling so demotivated. I would probably just procrastinate or laze around feeling crap about myself like I always do. But I'll give it a try. 



BBQ_Chicken said:


> yeah i know what you mean, its so hard to do anything when everything fels hopleless, ill buy a plane ticket to america and give you moral support (unless im a poor cheerleader, if so then i am sorry)
> Yeah I know what you mean, it's so freaking hard to do anything when it feels so hopeless and you have no one to support you while going through it all. I'll buy a plane ticket to America if you need the moral support (I do not rate my cheering abilities though).
> 
> A-L-E-X go ALEX!


[[hug]] And I'll fly over to the UK on Derpy to be your moral support whenever you need it as well.

I'll try to conjure up a mental image of you as my cheerleader whenever I feel hopeless or demotivated from now on.


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

Necro'ing my own thread with some goals/self-advice I typed up quickly last night. I hereby dub this list, "*Flip dat lief round, m8.*"

Will add more as I think of stuffs. As you can see I have segregated according to which prevalent sub issue I need to tackle, with advice (specific and general) following. I wrote it at 4am when I was already drugged up on sleeping pills, so pardon any mistakes.

*INSOMNIA*

Don't go on SAS after 1am on weekdays.
Take melatonin as needed, except when it is or is about to be light out.
Dim the lights by 10pm every night.
Regulate shower time. Shower by 10pm every night.
Read or study for an hour in bed before sleeping.
Don't ever sleep past 2am on weekdays.
Drink herbal tea.
Warm up in a sweater or blanket.
Only listen to calming music before bed.

*ANXIETY*

Exposure, exposure, exposure.
Eat more often inside the dining area.
Practice reading or studying in the library.
Consult doctor about anxiety medication. 
Take inhalor before going out first time in the day.
Wake up at least a full hour before having to go outside as to relax.
Eat breakfast.
Keep a trinket to fiddle with in pockets.
Always keep hat in backpack for emergency panic about appearance.
Practice using public transport.
Try to make conversation with classmates.
Write down questions or comments to participate in class.
Go on excursions alone. Push your limits. 
Breathing exercises and possible meditation.
Practice eye contact. It doesn't have to be a lot.

*DEPRESSION*

Revive "something good that has happened jar" for daily use.
Write positive self compliments and pep talks on slips of paper to pull from a box whenever sad.
Post positive quotes around appropriate areas of room; i.e. "awesome hair" next to the mirror.
Schedule. Make a morning, afternoon, and evening routine for waking up, getting ready, doing hw, etc.
Regulate meal times and plan the entire day's meals ahead of time.
Write a list of alternatives to self harm and reckless behaviours and keep it in a safe but available place.
Make a list of positive thoughts to negate each common negative thought.
Train self to switch to rationality every time a bad thought or worry enters.
Treat yourself daily. You deserve it! 
Lay out clothes night before to avoid time lost worrying or repeated outfits.
Shower daily no matter what.
Always eat at least 2 meals a day. No excuses!
Consult doctor about antidepressants.
Keep a list of contacts to communicate with when sad or frustrated.
Keep old boxes and papers to regroup when angry or frustrated. Lay out watercolors and big paper or cardboard or even sketchbook for vent art.
Organize a couple different cool down playlists for anger, jealousy, frustration, sadness, pity.
Join a volunteer organization.
Start exercising! Walk daily. 
Take breaks from computer, even just brief stretches every half hour.
Limit recreational internet usage to 2 hours daily.
Start really building up business ideas and sell!
Try to arrange a hang out for at least an hour weekly. Better, try to have at least one real life conversation daily!
There's no shame in asking for a hug or a pat on the back.
Take naps when you feel sad or tired. It's okay.


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## lunarc (Feb 25, 2014)

Good luck maine.


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

lunarc said:


> Good luck maine.


Thanks m8. So far -- at 0% completion. Wie wunderbar. Probably because I've been focusing on superficial, miniscule yet currently pressing goals as of late, such as completing homework on time and simply surviving through the day attending classes or chatting with family. I am determined to work on these goals soon, though.


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## Arbre (Mar 9, 2014)

https://www.khanacademy.org/

Khan Academy could help you with some of those subjects.


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## AceEmoKid (Apr 27, 2012)

^ thank you for the resource, eggshell. didn't notice your post until just now.

---------------------------------

New goal. Start working out. Especially on arms. I am determined to legitimately plan and pursue a solid workout plan once I move back home in a couple days for summer. I would also like to build my pure endurance with cardio. I've always avoided exercise due to asthma and depression/lack of motivation, but I shall make excuses no more.


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## ev29 (Feb 12, 2013)

This is awesome, good luck! I think I might try something like this.


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## tronjheim (Oct 21, 2012)

Wow! That's great for you Ace 
I wish you the best!


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