# Has anyone here thought about suicide?



## Cerz (Jan 18, 2010)

I've been reading about suicide and it always seems like depression is the mental disorder that is linked with suicide, not anxiety. I'm sure there are people who have killed themselves over anxiety. The worst thing anxiety disorders will cause (according the some websites) is a distressful life. Nothing about suicide. 

My question is has anyone here thought about suicide due to their anxiety?


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## Michael James (Aug 6, 2011)

All the time.....seems like things always get better shortly after I hit rock bottom though.


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

I do have many mental problems other than social anxiety. But when my SA was at its worse - I thought about suicide 24/7. Even started planning it at one point. Thing is - it doesn't link it anywhere because if someone with anxiety _did_ commit suicide - it would be blamed on depression only.


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## InfiniteBlaze (Jan 27, 2011)

Yeah, I suffer from recurring thoughts of suicide. I'm not suicidal ATM though.


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## Aeroflot (Jul 26, 2011)

The only time suicide crosses my mind is when I want to self-desensitise. I don't want to be afraid of thinking about anything, so I try to think about all the nasty things.


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

Note that anxiety and depression are often co-morbid. Suicide is frequently a result of depression that can stem from severe anxiety. People tend to mainly associate suicide with depression because depression is what it all comes down to.


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## Lasair (Jan 25, 2010)

My anxiety over certain things can get so bad I fall into depression - and I have had the suicidal thoughts more than once, I was so scared the most I could open up to was ideation...I was so scared to admit any further. It's a few months from then and I don't understand how I get that low but when I do it feel like nothing will help. I have been in a good place since I started medication


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## minimized (Nov 17, 2007)

Too much. It's not exactly _caused _by SA, and not that I'd ever be strong enough to get on with it...


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## changeforthebetter (Feb 15, 2011)

Social anxiety > sick of coping > depression > thoughts about suicide


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## Veritastar (Aug 16, 2011)

I think about how much I want to die all the time, but I've never thought of actually killing myself, probably because of my religious beliefs. It's just not worth it.


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## therunaways (Nov 21, 2010)

I think about it everyday, but I don't think I could ever do it.


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

SA or not I honestly think everybody's been there.


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## Fade_Into_Oblivion (Oct 7, 2008)

I think about it all the time and am surprised I'm still here. I know that things will never get better for me but for some strange reason I keep hanging around.


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## RetroDoll (Jun 25, 2011)

yea they say depression linked to suicide, never heard that about anxeity. frankly i don't know how suicide qualifies as having a mental illness. :stu


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## Ohio Fatso (Mar 17, 2008)

I've thought about it for 9 years. How long does it take and how many times must I suffer through big depressions before the tipping point finally happens? That's the question I suppose. 

I know life will never be good. Can't be. Even if I had everything I thought I wanted, I would find a way to be unsatisfied with it. Contentment is not allowed. Many times I have sat comfortably and thought, "You still need to adjust yourself. This still is not right." Nothing ever seems right and it never will. It never can. 

The pursuit of happiness? I'll never know what that is. I guess I'd rather keep living in misery than risk screwing up an attempt to die.


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## wootmehver (Oct 18, 2007)

I haven't been suicidal for years. At this point I think I'd rather hang around and see what will happen. I'm very interested in seeing what the year 2012 will bring, maybe some incredible global paradigm shift will happen. And there are always cool new movies I want to see. And I don't want to depress my friends and relatives, or put them on a guilt trip. And I own some nice collectible items and other stuff so I'm not about to turn into a ghost and witness movers coming into my apartment and removing my stuff and me being unable to stop them. And I don't like the idea of people talking about what a sad loser I was after I do away with myself. Life is short enough already, why hasten it?

I don't like getting an "incomplete" grade on the life thing. it makes me think of my laziness and impulsivity that I can't even complete my normal lifespan.


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## uponit01 (Sep 5, 2009)

MojoCrunch said:


> SA or not I honestly think everybody's been there.


Agree


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## hmnut (Aug 8, 2011)

Loneliness and anxiety can lead to depression, and depression can lead to suicide. So yeah I think a rather large number of SA people have at least considered suicide (myself included) how many have gone through with it, I don't know (but ones too many if you're the one).

I think I am past that stage in my life, mainly because I know how much it would hurt my mom. 

But it doesn't mean I'm not depressed sometimes.


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## josh23 (Nov 26, 2010)

24/7. Acted on it a couple times.


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## Syndacus (Aug 9, 2011)

Have had many recurring thoughts even on my good days. It's something that's been a part of me and I have acted on it 5-6 times, so I always have a reminder of that dark past of mine.


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## busdude (Mar 3, 2010)

Almost every day for over 3 and a half years now. Haven't come close to actually attempting it, I don't think I have the courage to do it, I'm probably doomed to be alone and miserable for the rest of my life.


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## SAgirl (Nov 15, 2003)

Yeah, I did once a long time ago. I had no sense of purpose at the time and nothing to live for. I've changed this by always thinking about what the future may hold. I have many dreams and things that I want to accomplish so I'm sticking around so that I can accomplish them.


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## RUFB2327 (Sep 28, 2008)

I don't really think about the actual act of suicide, I think more about the fact that I am not happy at all and I don't want to be alive. I'm afraid of the whole process of dying (which is strange since I'm so miserable being alive), so I don't think I would ever have the guts to actually take myself out.


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## MoniqueS (Feb 21, 2011)

Yes I have, but I developed a pretty severe depression due to my anxiety. Things just felt like they were never going to change or get better so it just didn't seem worth it. My depression has become much more mild, but I still have those dark moments where I still think about it. But I don't think I could ever actually go through it and hurt my family and friends who are trying so hard to be supportive for me right now.


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## Marakunda (Jun 7, 2011)

I think everyone thinks about it at least once in their lifetime, I've definitely thought of it before, but I'd NEVER actually do it....


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## PeakOfTheMountain (Oct 3, 2010)

yes and attempted once


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## awkwardpenguin (Jul 30, 2011)

I've thought about what it would be like to no longer exist and once I even got pretty emotional over my thoughts and heavily considered it. I would never go through with it though because I think about how many things I still want to do in life and how many things I still love about life. I used to think everybody had these thoughts at least once but I don't really know because I brought it up once and my friends thought I was insane. I mean, I would never have the balls to do it even if I wanted to but I've never actually really wanted to. So there's my confusing answer for you, lol. But yeah I've thought about it from time to time.


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## Cat Montgomery (Jul 31, 2011)

I've never seriously considered it.
But often I look for how I could where ever I am.


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## Sam1911 (Dec 4, 2010)

I've thought about it and I own a motorcycle so that is pretty suicidal.


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## DeeperUnderstanding (May 19, 2007)

I have, but never have acted on it. It seems so selfish to.


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## Fantas Eyes (Mar 23, 2011)

Yes, when I had really bad depression a few weeks ago.


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## UltraShy (Nov 8, 2003)

Sam1911 said:


> I've thought about it and I own a motorcycle so that is pretty suicidal.


I'm thinking Sam could find other ways to die. The 1911 in his name refers to an iconic 1911 pistol such as this:


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## Tipa (Aug 13, 2011)

I've never legitimately contemplated it, but I've thought about it. I think about my own death in general a bunch. I'm too much of a coward to ever commit suicide, I'm afraid of death too much. 

My suicidal thoughts aren't SA related though, I just also have really bad depression sometimes (even though my SA contributes to that depression lol)


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## comicbookkid (Jan 11, 2011)

i think about suicide. but i think it's because it's part of my fascination with death.


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## blackbird87 (Jan 24, 2011)

Always. However I have some odd fear of pain, which is what has stopped me in the past. To be completely honest, when I'm at my lowest, just the thought of suicide alone helps me feel better.


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## rainbowOne (Sep 26, 2010)

Pretty sure these threads are against the rules :|


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## Fenren (Sep 20, 2009)

Cerz said:


> My question is has anyone here thought about suicide due to their anxiety?


Yes I have, not for a while though.


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## Cerz (Jan 18, 2010)

rainbowOne said:


> Pretty sure these threads are against the rules :|


Why would they be against the rules?

We're talking about suicide, if you can't be mature about it then leave.


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## rainbowOne (Sep 26, 2010)

Cerz said:


> Why would they be against the rules?
> 
> We're talking about suicide, if you can't be mature about it then leave.





> On the forums, suicide threats and the discussion of suicide is not permitted. On your personal blog, sharing your feelings is fine, but please do not share means or plans of suicide.


http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f26/announcement-board-guidelines-updated-04-14-2011.html


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## Badmonkey (Dec 11, 2010)

^ This rule should be amended. I don't see the harm of having a *general* discussion about suicide. Or what if someone is having suicidal thoughts and is seeking advice on where to turn to for help. But that's just my opinion.


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

Regarding suicide and anxiety I'd say yes, my general anxiety has caused me to think about suicide. I despise the racing thoughts and paranoia. It's really no way to live and sometimes when a person gets so overwhelmed by it, they consider what life would be like if it ended. For a lot of people that live with major anxiety, life is replacing one worry with the next and having a life where none of that existed would strangely not be a life at all, as much as we want it to go away and relax for once. Kind of a weird explanation, but that's how suicide and anxiety are for me. I want the horrid anxiety to end but sometimes going through the process of calming it is what helps me get on with my life.


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## Cerz (Jan 18, 2010)

rainbowOne said:


> http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f26/announcement-board-guidelines-updated-04-14-2011.html


What a ****ty rule for a _mental health support_ site. If you can't talk about the more serious things that accompanies the illness why are we even here? Oppression of discussion is what causes suicide in the first place, the place where people can talk about suicide caused by their anxiety is banned on a site that says it's a support site?, why not just make this forum a general discussion forum then... Maybe the mods don't know that.


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## jamesd (Feb 17, 2011)

all the time. when you are extremely depressed it's very natural to think of suicide.


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## Bloody Pit Of Horror (Aug 15, 2011)

Yeah, cause life chooses to spare no quarters...

I keep getting the short end of the stick atop of suffering SA.


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## mysterioussoul (Jul 17, 2010)

basically everyday. lately i don't think there have been a day that i don't.


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## gomenne (Oct 3, 2009)

I know I can't do it, but I want to disappear, it would be welcome any time


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## changeforthebetter (Feb 15, 2011)

rainbowOne said:


> Pretty sure these threads are against the rules





Cerz said:


> What a ****ty rule for a _mental health support_ site. If you can't talk about the more serious things that accompanies the illness why are we even here? Oppression of discussion is what causes suicide in the first place, the place where people can talk about suicide caused by their anxiety is banned on a site that says it's a support site?, why not just make this forum a general discussion forum then... Maybe the mods don't know that.


I don't think these are the sort of threads they are trying to stop, they just don't want people openly discussing methods and saying they are going to do themselves, i can understand that

http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f35/threads-about-suicide-82301/

'We know you must be feeling pretty bad if you are thinking about posting a thread about suicide.

While SAS exists to provide support, a public discussion forum is not the place to get support when you are feeling suicidal.'


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## tranquildream (Nov 17, 2010)

Depression and anxiety tend to be co-morbid... You usually don't have one without the other. Yeah, I've thought about it several times =/


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## Poisoned (Jun 28, 2011)

I suppose I have. I've never really thought of the reason for my suicidal thoughts though. I'd always say to myself- "If you just did it, you wouldn't have to go back." (to school) I always have small panic attacks at school which cause me to think this way, but I just sleep off the thoughts before they get too intense.


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## jimmiow (Aug 31, 2010)

*Suicidal: Effexor*

I had social anxiety for 3 years before I started taking anti-d's. Started on Lexapro. Took that for 7 months as prescribed. After 3 weeks suicidal thoughts started to creep in, especially after an arguement, etc. I have to note that I have read up on most there is to know of the two drugs. In saying that placebo can effect the ability to differentiate.

I started taking 1mg Alprazolam (Xanax) 2 months before I started taking Effexor (I started taking it immediately after quitting Lexapro) and I still had suicidal thoughts, but mostly in times of feeling anger, distress, loneliness.

I stopped taking Alprazolam after 4 months which seemed to spark a high in my Effexor. I'm not 100% but I had no benzo withdrawal and I actually felt more sedated after I stopped (go figure).

If anyone here is or has taken Effexor I am really interested to know if you experienced a sedation/euphoria when taking Effexor at the highest dose prescribed.

James


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## wrongnumber (May 24, 2009)

Occasionally.


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## Diacetylmorphine (Mar 9, 2011)

Sometimes. Not so much the method of ending my life, just the mere thought of being better off dead.


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## wootmehver (Oct 18, 2007)

gomenne said:


> I know I can't do it, but I want to disappear, it would be welcome any time


THAT'S IT! Disappear like Yoda did at age 800 in The Empire Strikes Back. Go straight to the spiritual realm without leaving a body behind.


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## Ventura (May 5, 2009)

SA or just anxiety gives me irrational thinking...I tend to take things over board and get suicidal over something that really I should not be upset with ?  .... Just gatta keep telling myself im over reacting...


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## gumbee (Aug 17, 2011)

Plenty of times. I live with my elderly grandparents and they are my only family. I couldn't leave them miserable like that. I'm more worried about how they'll feel if I did it than doing it, if it makes sense. We must all stay strong and positive though!


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## Ventura (May 5, 2009)

rainbowOne said:


> http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f26/announcement-board-guidelines-updated-04-14-2011.html


That is a stupid rule should be fixed a bit ...

A thread kind of like this one locked ..here


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## Ambient (Aug 16, 2011)

As a result of my SAD, I suffer from depression as well. I think about suicide almost every day, but have never acted on it. It's been a struggle for the past 13 years.

My uncle killed himself when I was 12, and I saw what devastation that wrought among my family. I never want to put my family through that again.


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## Squirrelevant (Jul 27, 2008)

I started thinking about it a couple of months ago. Now I think about it most days. My social anxiety and avoidance have lead to isolation, difficulties relating to others, growing neuroticism and an almost constant feeling that I don't belong around people. As a result of all this, I've been suffering through a deep depression of late. I don't think my suicidal thoughts are all that irrational either, even if they might be overly pessimistic.


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## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

Yes, a lot, but less than high school and college. Attempted once at 21.


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

Sometimes I get really sad and start thinking about everything and my mind starts racing and then I think how great it would be if I just ended it. But usually if I just breathe and distract myself the thoughts start going away.


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## Amocholes (Nov 5, 2003)

*Suicide
If you are currently thinking about killing yourself please seek help immediately: http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/ 
On the forums, suicide threats and the discussion of suicide is not permitted. On your personal blog, sharing your feelings is fine, but please do not share means or plans of suicide.*


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