# Not sure why my friend hasn't replied to my text?



## mushroom1pie

So, a few weeks ago I was contacted by someone I was good (platonic) friends with at university. We had not not previously had any contact for about a year and a half.

After she asked me what I was up to now I explained that I help care for my dad, that I'm not in work and asked what was new with her. She expressed her sympathy and stated she wants a new job (to date the last message I have received from her).

My response, sent on 7 March, was this:
"Thanks. We are in two mind over whether to put him in care but that would bring a lot of financial worries. Bit of a nightmare weighing up which is the least bad option. How come you want a new job? Do you have anything in mind?"

Didn't get a response so I sent this on 20 March:
"Hope I didn't say anything that might have offended you :/"

I've wondered whether to drop her a FB message to check she received my texts... but I see no reason why she shouldn't have. 

So if anyone can help me understand why she hasn't replied I would be most grateful!


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## RRAAGGEE

I don't see why she stopped replying...


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## Use Your Illusion

No need to send a FB message. You didn't say anything wrong and since you already sent that text asking if you'd offended her it'll just be excessive.

It might have been hard for her to reply if you'd just talked about your dad but you asked about her and her job situation, giving her an opening to reply. I've had this happen myself, when I've asked a question of someone and they don't reply. Then they text weeks/months later and just start a new conversation. It's really frustrating but there's nothing you've done "wrong" here.

I can't see why she would text you out of the blue like that just to seemingly talk and catch up, and then not reply. But it just happens sometimes. I have a friend at Uni who does the same thing. Try not to put too much weight on this, like expecting replies from her or conversation, it will drive you nuts. Maybe she's just busy job hunting and dealing with interviews etc. 

But after going through it a couple of times of trying to stay a close friend to someone who was cool with a little distance and us not talking as much. I've learned to only give people as much thought/attention as they give me in friendships. Try to do that. So try not to stress about it and just reply if/when she does. She'll most likely just say she "Got really busy" or was just "Dealing with some stuff." Since most people who don't have SA have a lot more friends than we do, she might have read your text but then got a handful of others off other people, either making plans or just making conversation. Meaning your text will have been pushed down her list and she might have forgotten about it.


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## Haunty

I wouldn't have sent that text about being offending when you obviously weren't. It is odd she didn't respond, but I'd just let the ball stay in her court and rot for a while.


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