# Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched couples?



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

Does anyone else also look at couples out in public (such at a store or whatever) and either think, "They just don't look right together - they shouldn't be together"... or the opposite, "They seem right for each other"?

I do this ALL the time. In fact, I do this everytime I go out somewhere. I guess it especially annoys me when I see a couple together where the woman is SO much more attractive than the guy she is with and it is obvious to everyone (except the woman) that the guy shouldn't be allowed to be within 10 feet of her - much less, dating her! I just think in regards to the woman, "My god, what is wrong with you!?? You can do SO much better than that!". I suppose the REAL reason I'm annoyed (and so bitter) is that I see these incredible women with these dorks and I think to myself, "Why are these women going after theses below average dudes, but these same women don't give a nice, decent looking guy like me a second look?" Speaking as a guy, I tend to look at how particular women match up with the guy they are with. Maybe women do the opposite - maybe you look at guys and how they match up with the women they are with.

Anyway, for some reason it is just so annoying to me to see mismatched couples. Does anyone else have these feelings?

Lifetimer


----------



## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

Not me. You love who you love. I am sure that my husband, who is 13 years older than me, might be considered by some to be mismatched with me but he has treated me better than ANY MAN ever has.... If anyone can find love in this f**ed up world than go to it and God Bless.... Its no one else business, really. IMHO, of course


----------



## mal (Mar 26, 2007)

I think it's great. The only time it annoys me is if the partner (of either sex) is abusive to the other, only then would I ponder why are they staying with them. 
But unattractive & ugly people together.....who is to say what the other finds unattractive or not ?


----------



## skeeter31 (Dec 9, 2006)

I don't agree with that statement...It's not all based on looks...It's whats' inside that counts!

I know on the surface, people would probably think my girlfriend is way too attractive to be with me (I don't think I'm a looker, but everyone I talk to says I'm pretty good looking)...Looks are only part of the equation...My gf and I get along on soo many levels and are just perfect for eachother!!


----------



## Strength (Aug 12, 2006)

I used to think exactly like that. I still do sometimes, but not regards to looks, more in terms of their life/personality. I might think "why is a nice girl like that going out with a bad guy like that?"
It really comes down to confidence and the ability to communicate yourself to her. Girls care less about looks than guys.


----------



## emptybottle (Jan 3, 2005)

Lifetimer said:


> I do this ALL the time. In fact, I do this everytime I go out somewhere. I guess it especially annoys me when I see a couple together where the woman is SO much more attractive than the guy she is with and it is obvious to everyone (except the woman) that the guy shouldn't be allowed to be within 10 feet of her - much less, dating her! I just think in regards to the woman, "My god, what is wrong with you!?? You can do SO much better than that!". I suppose the REAL reason I'm annoyed (and so bitter) is that I see these incredible women with these dorks and I think to myself, "Why are these women going after theses below average dudes, but these same women don't give a nice, decent looking guy like me a second look?" Speaking as a guy, I tend to look at how particular women match up with the guy they are with. Maybe women do the opposite - maybe you look at guys and how they match up with the women they are with.


It doesn't annoy me. I'm annoyed with myself when I automatically think stuff like "that dude must have money" or "he must have a great sense of humor," as if there was no way the girl could possibly be physically attracted to a dorky-looking guy.
I notice that among the mismatched couples I see, couples where the woman is significantly more attractive than the guy is much more common than the other way around. I take it as proof that looks matter less to women.

Personally, I'm more bothered by couples who look like brother and sister. lol


----------



## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

> Does anyone else also look at couples out in public (such at a store or whatever) and either think, "They just don't look right together - they shouldn't be together"... or the opposite, "They seem right for each other"?
> 
> I do this ALL the time. In fact, I do this everytime I go out somewhere. I guess it especially annoys me when I see a couple together where the woman is SO much more attractive than the guy she is with and it is obvious to everyone (except the woman) that the guy shouldn't be allowed to be within 10 feet of her - much less, dating her!


You have a weird view of reality.


----------



## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

Lifetimer said:


> I do this ALL the time. In fact, I do this everytime I go out somewhere. I guess it especially annoys me when I see a couple together where the woman is SO much more attractive than the guy she is with and it is obvious to everyone (except the woman) that the guy shouldn't be allowed to be within 10 feet of her - much less, dating her! I just think in regards to the woman, "My god, what is wrong with you!?? You can do SO much better than that!". I suppose the REAL reason I'm annoyed (and so bitter) is that I see these incredible women with these dorks and I think to myself, "Why are these women going after theses below average dudes, but these same women don't give a nice, decent looking guy like me a second look?" Speaking as a guy, I tend to look at how particular women match up with the guy they are with. Maybe women do the opposite - maybe you look at guys and how they match up with the women they are with.


you have a lot of time to waste...
I don't see the point, unless you plan to open a match making business one day.


----------



## Kelly (Dec 12, 2003)

Lifetimer said:


> Does anyone else also look at couples out in public (such at a store or whatever) and either think, "They just don't look right together - they shouldn't be together"... or the opposite, "They seem right for each other"?
> 
> I do this ALL the time. In fact, I do this everytime I go out somewhere. I guess it especially annoys me when I see a couple together where the woman is SO much more attractive than the guy she is with and it is obvious to everyone (except the woman) that the guy shouldn't be allowed to be within 10 feet of her - much less, dating her! I just think in regards to the woman, "My god, what is wrong with you!?? You can do SO much better than that!". I suppose the REAL reason I'm annoyed (and so bitter) is that I see these incredible women with these dorks and I think to myself, "Why are these women going after theses below average dudes, but these same women don't give a nice, decent looking guy like me a second look?" Speaking as a guy, I tend to look at how particular women match up with the guy they are with. Maybe women do the opposite - maybe you look at guys and how they match up with the women they are with.
> 
> ...


I don't want to downplay your feelings or anything, but I was wondering if you considered it from the couple's perspective. It seems a bit irresponsible to post something like this on an SA message board when you know that feeling self-conscious of others' opinions is a major problem for people with SA. Why would you go out of your way to announce to people who are struggling with this problem that you are judging them so negatively? You could be doing more harm than good.

Have a nice day,
Kelly


----------



## dubz1308 (May 21, 2007)

Lifetimer said:


> Does anyone else also look at couples out in public (such at a store or whatever) and either think, "They just don't look right together - they shouldn't be together"... or the opposite, "They seem right for each other"?
> 
> I do this ALL the time. In fact, I do this everytime I go out somewhere. I guess it especially annoys me when I see a couple together where the woman is SO much more attractive than the guy she is with and it is obvious to everyone (except the woman) that the guy shouldn't be allowed to be within 10 feet of her - much less, dating her! I just think in regards to the woman, "My god, what is wrong with you!?? You can do SO much better than that!". I suppose the REAL reason I'm annoyed (and so bitter) is that I see these incredible women with these dorks and I think to myself, "Why are these women going after theses below average dudes, but these same women don't give a nice, decent looking guy like me a second look?" Speaking as a guy, I tend to look at how particular women match up with the guy they are with. Maybe women do the opposite - maybe you look at guys and how they match up with the women they are with.
> 
> ...


Well first off when u say they those women dont even look at you..do you think the first time that her partner meet her that he was looked at ..no way. Another thing to keep in mind a lot of very good looking women are self conscious and they want a guy they will feel comfortable with. Also she probably gets whatever shes wants some girls love the control factor but to each his own ..there are couples out there where its opposite like the guys is confident and somewhat of an @#$hole and some girls are attracted to that.


----------



## maidmarion (May 21, 2007)

I really don't think that it is fair to judge people on there looks. 

I'm married and love my husband to bits but we are probably looked on by some as being a strange match. We don't look anything alike and in lots of ways are opposites but we have so much in common. He's the sweetest guy I've ever known even though he is far from perfect just like me. 

I wonder if you have fallen in love because the old saying that love is blind is very true. What I consider to be attractive has alot more to do with personality than looks. 

Like most women I am not so concerned with good looks. We all have our insecurities and we don't see ourselves as others do


----------



## sprinter (Nov 22, 2003)

Well I don't think it annoys me but I do notice when a couple just doesn't look right together. Mostly when the guy is about the same height or even shorter than the girl. What about all the really short girls under say under 5'1 who are they supposed to be with? It seems like the short girls are being passed over. :stu


----------



## leppardess (Nov 8, 2003)

No, it doesn't annoy me. But, I guess I speak from a unique perspective as I've been a 'target' for this kind of attitude. One time, I was going out (briefly) with a rather tall, good looking guy (I'm 5' 2" and average looking) and it was constantly told to us, when we were together that we made an odd couple. While this didn't bother me, it bothered my then b/f and he ended up dumping me in part to the constant comments about our differences. 

People love who they love, irregardless of their differences. For what it's worth, it's fine to be annoyed by something like this as long as you don't voice your feelings to the object of your annoyance. A lot of things annoy me to death but that's my issue, not someone else's.

Also, looks are relative. Someone could be really good looking and be a creep inside and someone can be truly ugly on the outside and be a wonderful person on the inside. Looks aren't everything, even though a lot of people put a lot of stock in such.


----------



## fraidycat (Oct 29, 2004)

hehe..i don't know why this strikes me as a funny post. I have to admit that I do notice mismatched couples more in public (attractive + non, short male+ tall female etc)... It's kind of intriguing to see how they handle being viewed as a pair that possibly stands out. Some couples seem uncomfortable and lack chemistry while others have a great connection. It's almost like watching an attention grabbing beautiful girl for me. I like seeing how they carry themselves and try to keep that in mind when I feel like all on eyes on me for one sa reason or another.


----------



## beckjcream (Feb 20, 2005)

no i could really care less. although one time i did see this really dorky looking guy with a hot chick. he walked around with a big old smirk on his face like he just won the lottery.


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

Well, when I said it annoys me to see mismatched couples, I didn't necessarily mean it annoys me ONLY because one of them is better looking than the other (even though I DID mention how that annoys me, it's my fault for not explaining myself better). Yes, it certainly annoys me when one person is MUCH more attractive than the other. However, what equally annoys me is when I can usually tell if one is just "too good" for the other. And I'm not necessarily talking about the looks department (though that certainly plays a part). I've always been an intuitive person, and most of the time I can tell within a very short time period how a person generally "is". I can see an attractive person (or even an ugly person) and tell if they are classy, elegant, smart, and have an aura (maybe "charisma" is the word I'm looking for) of being a top quality person. I can also see someone just as attractive and tell if they lack class, not particularly smart, no charisma, ... basically, for a lack of a better term, a below average type of person. This is what I am talking about (along with looks) when I talk about how certain couples should not be together. For example, I've seen couples who I would equate to someone like Princess Diana dating a stinky old homeless man with a mental disorder. Maybe Princess Diana isn't the best example because she is no longer living, but I don't know any other princesses. lol. However, if she were still alive today and dating a stinky old homeless man with a mental disorder, would you STILL think that is a great thing? When I see couples not very far from this example then THAT'S what I am talking about when I say it really annoys me. I always tell myself, "That is just not right! You can EASILY find someone much better!"

Someone mentioned earlier that I shouldn't tell someone that they are too good for their bf/gf. I just want to say that I've NEVER told anyone that. I've WANTED to, but I never have. These are just thoughts I have in my head when I see mismatched couples. And when I say mismatched couples, I am talking about severely mismatched, and no less. The only answer I can come up with is that the person who is the better of the two must have (for some reason) low self esteem. Otherwise, I have no other answer. I personally think a lot more people here feel simiarly as I do, but they just don't want to admit it.

Lifetimer


----------



## mserychic (Oct 2, 2004)

Who are you to judge relationships? Not everyone goes by the same standards as you. You can't tell what people are like just by looking at them.


----------



## SusanStorm (Oct 27, 2006)

That the couple you are looking at are mismatched is your opinion,not theirs.People love someone because of reasons you can't see by looking at their looks.
And peoples taste is different,so those girls might actually think that the guy they are with is handsome :b 
I know how it's like to be "mismatched" in other peoples eyes.With my ex I was taller than him,and people would come up to us and ask "why are you with him?" and "you shouldn't be with him". I just got so annoyed.Why people always have to push their belifs over on other people because they are "right".


----------



## whiteclouds (Mar 18, 2004)

Instead of agonizing over other couples, you could be using all your energy and intuitive powers to find a good woman for yourself.

I’m just curious why you get so angry at the women, but you (seemingly?) bare no grudge towards the dorky guy who won the prize you think he doesn’t deserve?

In the spirit of competition, when you’re in love with a woman, it’s your job to convince her that she CAN do better, (i.e. by hooking up with you).


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

No, I don't really judge people like that. Sometimes I see an interesting couple, but who am I to say they're not right for each other?


----------



## scairy (Sep 18, 2005)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



mal said:


> I think it's great. The only time it annoys me is if the partner (of either sex) is abusive to the other, only then would I ponder why are they staying with them.
> But unattractive & ugly people together.....who is to say what the other finds unattractive or not ?


I see things in a similar way. At a glance I really don't think about it. Now if I'm told about how a bf/ gf or hear about how a bf/ gf is treating the other person like crap I start to wonder why they are together.

I personally have some kind of problem where I can't really match up people on a 1-10 scale type thing. I don't even know what I'd match up with. When I hear someone is in a crappy relationship I think to myself and wonder how am I single. I'm a better person than they are. All that being said if I was better at matching individuals on physical attributes I'd probably do that because it's more convenient and easier to arrive at a face/ initial judgement; not saying this is the right thing to do just more convenient and as humans we tend to take the convenient route.


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

whiteclouds said:


> I'm just curious why you get so angry at the women, but you (seemingly?) bare no grudge towards the dorky guy who won the prize you think he doesn't deserve?


The reason I have nothing against the dorky guy is because what dorky guy would turn down "a prize" if he found it? After all, he is DORKY, and how often would someone like him find a prize like he has? It's like someone who is poor turning down a million dollars. The girl, on the other hand, should know better. But because of self-esteem issues, she chooses someone beneath her.

Using my previous example, you can't tell me you wouldn't think there is something very weird about a princess dating a stinky old homeless man with a mental disorder. If you say you don't then you are not being honest with yourself or others here.



mserychic said:


> Who are you to judge relationships? Not everyone goes by the same standards as you. You can't tell what people are like just by looking at them.


mserychic, you mean to say you've never encountered a person that is obviously a real "catch" without knowing that person for any significant length of time? And on the opposite end of the spectrum, you've never encountered someone who is obviously a scumbag? It is not hard to tell if 2 people are fairly alike or if one is so much higher than another. I agree that we can't figure this out about EVERY couple - because nothing is 100% - but more times than not we CAN tell how one person is so much better than the other. My god, some things are just obvious!!

Don't get me wrong, the majority of couples DO fit each other well. That is because of the Law of Attraction: Like atracts Like. However, as I said, nothing is 100% and this also applies to the law of attraction as well. What I am saying is that there is a small percentage of couples (but I wouldn't necessarily say "rare") where it is just ridiculous for one of them to be with the other (such as my example of the beautiful princess and the stinky old mentally challenged homeless man). As I said, in that type of case it is clear one has self-esteem issues (the incredible "catch") and the other won the lottery (the incredible "dork").

Lifetimer


----------



## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

Its amazing that this is your rebuttal to the many posts you have received in response. The consensus seems to be that an outsider of a relationship cannot properly judge the dynamics within said relationship. It would blow my mind for someone who knows NOTHING ABOUT ME to think they have the right to judge my relationship....I am 38 and my husband is 52. I dont feel any big age difference myself, though we are probably a generation apart but there is so much in common, so many shared interests, so much love, etc etc it just seems cruel that by simply LOOKING AT US someone could harshly judge whether or not we belong together. That is shallow, simplistic, and ridiculous. Just because you perceive someone to be "better" than the other doesnt mean that is the way others see it. If someone is with someone, in love with them, they dont think in the terms of being "better" than their mate, they are equals, peers, lovers, and friends. Who are you to say that they shouldnt be together? Love is love, you love who love. No one has a say in it but the two people in the relationship.

BTW this same type of logic is used when judging gay people. Its wrong, they shouldnt be together...blah blah blah.....My son is gay and I shudder when I think of the judgement he has to go through....Happiness is what we all seek....why can't people just let other people be happy??? Why do people think they have a right to judge who others should be with??? I just dont get that???


----------



## bent (Aug 4, 2005)

my gf is way better looking than me so i hope that fact alone doesn't mean we are "mismatched" and that she must have self-esteem issues to be with me. i believe it is not the case as she could choose from any number of guys and i have no money to compensate. women don't always want the same things as men so we (men) can never totally know why they like who they like. sometimes they are predictable yes, but other times not. i think couples that on first glance seem "mismatched" should be welcomed. I recently saw a very tall woman with a significantly shorter man walking hand in hand down a major street in toronto the other day. i couldn't stop myself from noticing and i fear that the woman actually felt like i had leered in disapproval. but really i was pleasantly surprised. if we try to view relationships as having many facets and make unorthodox pairings more accepted i think people will be happier. they will be more free to find someone who really makes them happy regardless of social judgments.


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Penny said:


> Its amazing that this is your rebuttal to the many posts you have received in response. The consensus seems to be that an outsider of a relationship cannot properly judge the dynamics within said relationship. It would blow my mind for someone who knows NOTHING ABOUT ME to think they have the right to judge my relationship....I am 38 and my husband is 52. I dont feel any big age difference myself, though we are probably a generation apart but there is so much in common, so many shared interests, so much love, etc etc it just seems cruel that by simply LOOKING AT US someone could harshly judge whether or not we belong together. That is shallow, simplistic, and ridiculous. Just because you perceive someone to be "better" than the other doesnt mean that is the way others see it. If someone is with someone, in love with them, they dont think in the terms of being "better" than their mate, they are equals, peers, lovers, and friends. Who are you to say that they shouldnt be together? Love is love, you love who love. No one has a say in it but the two people in the relationship.
> 
> BTW this same type of logic is used when judging gay people. Its wrong, they shouldnt be together...blah blah blah.....My son is gay and I shudder when I think of the judgement he has to go through....Happiness is what we all seek....why can't people just let other people be happy??? Why do people think they have a right to judge who others should be with??? I just dont get that???


Wow, this is a great post.


----------



## pyramidsong (Apr 17, 2005)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> whiteclouds said:
> 
> 
> > I'm just curious why you get so angry at the women, but you (seemingly?) bare no grudge towards the dorky guy who won the prize you think he doesn't deserve?
> ...


Interesting how someone with SA feels so entitled to judge others...


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

Strength said:


> It really comes down to confidence and the ability to communicate yourself to her. Girls care less about looks than guys.


What I was going to say


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

libbyberk83 said:


> Strength said:
> 
> 
> > It really comes down to confidence and the ability to communicate yourself to her. Girls care less about looks than guys.
> ...


Libby,

So am I to infer that you have NO standards when it comes to what a guy looks like? So he can look like a troll that's just crawled out from under a bridge, with his knuckles dragging the ground, and it wouldn't matter to you as long as he is confident and has a good personality?

I'm not trying to make this any sort of negative post, I'm just curious about how women say that it doesn't matter of the appearance of a guy. It just seems that - whether it be a woman or man - that a person would want at least SOME measure of appearance/physical attractiveness from the oppostite sex.

On the opposite side of the coin, yes, physical attractiveness in a woman is very important to me. BUT, it is not everything. She has GOT to have at least a decent personality with decent values -- similar to mine. Otherwise, I am not interested in a relationship with her.

Now, a one night stand with someone without the personality,,,, hmmm. :b

Lifetimer


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

Ummm... I just agreed with the fact that girls care less about looks than guys. I in no way said that girls didn't care at all. 

Although, it makes me sick that guys find attractiveness to be so damn important. Of course men are attracted to girls with intelligence and personality... as long as she's pretty, too. There goes my chances of love. 

BLAH.


----------



## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

There are plenty of girls and guys that don't fit the media stereotype for attractiveness that get into stable long-term happy relationships. 

There are also other things you can do to make yourself more attractive to another person that has nothing to do with your appearance. If you both have the same interests and hobbies, it makes it easier to get to know someone, and they become more attractive to you.


----------



## LonelyEnigma (Jan 7, 2007)

.....


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

libbyberk83 said:


> Ummm... I just agreed with the fact that girls care less about looks than guys. I in no way said that girls didn't care at all.


So, I'm just trying to get this straight about where you - Libby - stand with this (not what girls in general feel). Do looks matter zero to you? I totally understand you want a guy to have confidence, good personality, etc., but wouldn't you want someone to also have at least some physical attractiveness? Or, if a guy is TOTALLY ugly but has all those other things, you would still be interested in dating him? I am just curious ... that's why I am asking.



libbyberk83 said:


> Although, it makes me sick that guys find attractiveness to be so damn important.


In one of my previous posts on this thread I said that physical attractiveness in a woman is very important to me. It was a mistake to put the word "very" into that sentence. I truthfully do not feel that looks are "very" important to me. A more accurate way to describe how I feel is that "physical attractiveness is important to me", however it is inaccurate to say it is "very" important for me as a factor in deciding about a relationship. I know it's just one word, but that one word can make a statement inaccurate. As I said in my other post, attractiveness isn't everything. I can name you very attractive girls I've known who I have no interest in because they are sorry excuses for a human being/and or screwed up individuals. Well, there's no use in naming them because you wouldn't know them anyway, but you get the point. :b

Lifetimer


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

libbyberk83 said:


> Of course men are attracted to girls with intelligence and personality... as long as she's pretty, too. There goes my chances of love.
> 
> BLAH.


I consider myself to be an attractive guy with a good personality and good values, so that is why I made the statement that I prefer an attractive girl with a good personality and good values.

That is what this whole thread is about ... couples should at least fairly match with each other - NOT mismatch with each other. In regards to your quote, my point is that the unattractive girl with the intelligence and personality should be with someone that at least fairly matches her. The closer the match, the better. And obviously the same applies with the unattractive guy with the same qualites. That's the way the law of nature works (and also the way the law of attraction applies - like attracts like). What I'm saying is for girls who are not necessarily physically attractive but have intelligence and a personality ... they should be with guys on their level (similarly matched). And of course the same is true for the unattractive guys with intelligence and personality - they should find someone on their level as well. If a girl or a guy is unattractive and has NO personality, then they are best suited to find someone similar to them. When people go against this law of nature, more times than not there will be problems. Either the great looking person in the relationship will at some point begin to realize they can and should find someone closer to their level (especially if this great looking person has a great personality as well), OR the other person in the relationship is SO much out of his/her league with their partner, that the person will begin to feel inside that they are not good enough for their much more attractive/and or much better personality partner. They also will have in the back of their mind that it's only a matter of time until the great looking person begins to realize that their partner just does not match them, and that they can do better. Whether the great looking person actually feels this way is not the point in this scenario. The point in that situation is that the much more unattractive person will always have that FEELING and suspicion in the back of his/her mind.

And that is just SOME of the reasons why it is best that a couple be properly - or at least fairly - matched. Are there mismatched couples in the world who are having no problems at all? Yes, of course. I'm sure if you look around enough you will find some doing fine. That is because there ALWAYS are the exceptions&#8230; nothing in the world is 100% (except death :dead and taxes, as the old say goes). However, for every mismatched couple that works out well, there are a dozen or more (probably many more) that miserably fail.

There are those here who have point out a few specific instances of mismatched couples doing well - the exception to the rule - but I've seen or heard many more specific cases (either personally or through the media) of mismatched couples failing than of those doing well. For some reason, people like to point out and focus on the minority of a given situation and ignore the majority. Why is that? :stu It's a weird trait we humans have.

Again, it's just the law of nature. And like the old television commercial said, "It's not nice to fool Mother Nature!"

Lifetimer

P.S. - Libby, judging from your quote, I assume you feel you are not attractive? If that picture in your avatar is you, then I honestly think you are really cute!


----------



## justlistening (Dec 4, 2006)

libbyberk mentioned twice that girls care *less * about looks than guys ... So why do you react like this: 
_Can I conclude that you have NO standards at all, a guy can look like a troll?_ and 
_Let me het this straight, do looks mean zero to you? a guy can be TOTALLY ugly?_



Lifetimer said:


> Again, it's just the law of nature. And like the old television commercial said, "It's not nice to fool Mother Nature!"


Which law of nature? The only law of (the wild) nature I know is that the strongest and most powerful male ends up with the female.

And don't just focus on aesthetic attractiveness, attitude and the kind of vibe you send are also very important when it comes to outer beauty and physical attraction.


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

Lifetimer, why do you care about other people so much? What does it have to do with you?

But, to answer your questions - 

To me personally, personality definitely comes before looks. How someone acts or the way someone treats me is a huge factor in whether or not I find a guy to be attractive. For example, two "celebrities" who I find quite attractive are Matthew Perry and Adam Savage from "Mythbusters". My point - adorableness trumps looks. As for dating, I don't think in those terms, because that would involve a guy actually taking an interest in me, which has never happened. 

I am confused as to why you believe people should be matched up based on your perspective of attractiveness. I really don't think mother nature gives a **** about human society and culture. I agree with Lonelyheart in that I feel you are being quite prejudice.

:sigh And yes, that is me in my avatar, but no I am not cute.


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

justlistening said:


> libbyberk mentioned twice that girls care *less * about looks than guys ... So why do you react like this:
> _Can I conclude that you have NO standards at all, a guy can look like a troll?_ and _Let me het this straight, do looks mean zero to you? a guy can be TOTALLY ugly?_
> 
> I had mistakenly read the quote by Libby in which she said, "Girls care less about looks than guys". I had thought she wrote, "Girls *could* care less about the looks of a guy". In other words, I had thought she said girls don't care at all about the way a guy looks. So that is why I reacted by saying she must not have any standards at all about the way a guy looks. It was totally my mistake and I apologize for reading it wrong. Still, even though I agree that guys tend to place more emphasis on looks than girls, I still think it matters to most women a little more than the generalization Libby made. I'm not saying looks matter as much to women as they do men (I agree, it generally matters more to men), I'm just saying it matters at least a little more to women than what we are being led to believe by some members here.
> ...


I've already explained the law of nature in my other post. The law of nature says it's only natural for people to be with similar people. It applies to not only people, but animals and other things as well. It's largely related to the well-known Law of Attraction -- like attracts like. When people try to go against this law, then it usually causes problems. As I said, it doesn't guarantee there will be problems (becuase there are always exceptions to the rule), but more times than not, it will. You can go back to my post if want to know some of the ways it can cause problems.

Lifetimer


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



libbyberk83 said:


> Lifetimer, why do you care about other people so much? What does it have to do with you?


You ask, why do I care about other people so much? And, what does it have to do with me? Well, that is just the way I am. I'm a caring person and I care about people. That's what it has to do with me. I know in today's world it's not necessarily considered a good and noble trait anymore to care about others who are not in a person's immediate family or part of their group of friends. It seems people today care only about themselves, their family, and their friends, and nobody else. They don't care about what goes on in the world. Their attitude is, "Let people do WHATEVER they want." To them, there is no right, there is no wrong (unless it is something extreme). What matters to them is, "If it feels good, do it." All that matters to them is that "Number One" is taken care of. If something is not affecting them directly then they just don't care. Those last three words generally sum up today's world ... People "just don't care".

Now I, on the other hand, DO care. I care about people. I care about many things. I already explained how mismatched couples can end up easily having problems and getting hurt. If I can help just ONE person clearly think things through before making a wrong decision, then it was all worth it.

Libby, yes I do believe you when you say "personality comes before looks." But I still believe that the more attractive a guy is then the more it will go in your "plus" column. It will be hard to believe that a girl would choose an average guy with personality over an attractive guy with the same amount of personality. UNLESS ... she is ALSO an average person with personality. That is the situation in which she would most likely choose the average guy. Then, guess what? That ol' Law of Nature/Law of Attraction has stuck again!

As for your avatar, all I can go by is what I see. And I see a pretty girl there. However, remember, to me it's not only about looks, it's your "intelligence and personality." 

Lifetimer


----------



## mserychic (Oct 2, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> You ask, why do I care about other people so much? And, what does it have to do with me? Well, that is just the way I am. I'm a caring person and I care about people.


I think you are confusing pointless judging with caring.


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



mserychic said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > You ask, why do I care about other people so much? And, what does it have to do with me? Well, that is just the way I am. I'm a caring person and I care about people.
> ...


Exactly. Saying that someone doesn't deserve another person or is going to have problems with another person based on their level of attractiveness is bull****.


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



libbyberk83 said:


> Exactly. Saying that someone doesn't deserve another person or is going to have problems with another person based on their level of attractiveness is @#%$.


Wrong. It's just common sense and the way things work. I didn't invent the rules, it's just the way it is (generally).

People have a hard time accepting it because they want everything to be equal and just. That is not how the world works. Also, people who are unattractive - or BELIEVE they are unattractive - just don't like the idea of someone more attractive than them not interested in them. They therefore say things like, "It is wrong to believe a man/or woman is going to have problems being with someone who is out of their league." That is because, even though they won't admit it, they don't like it that the much more attractive person is following the Law of Attraction and persuing people similar to themeselves (the attractive person) ... instead of persuing the less attractive person.

I know, it doesn't seem fair, but that's just the way it is.

If you'll (not necessarily Libby, but for anyone) not fight it and instead embrace finding someone on your level - whatever level that may be - and is not out of your league, you will be MUCH happier in your relationships and in life.

Lifetimer


----------



## mserychic (Oct 2, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> libbyberk83 said:
> 
> 
> > Exactly. Saying that someone doesn't deserve another person or is going to have problems with another person based on their level of attractiveness is @#%$.
> ...


Just because you believe something doesn't make it common sense. Everyone is different and doesn't follow the same "rules" as you. Just the amount of people disagreeing with you in this thread should show not everyone believes looks are what matter. Even in your world where looks are the most important.. not everyone has the same opinion of what is attractive as you do so it's pretty asinine that you think everyone should follow what you believe to be attractive.


----------



## Atticus (Nov 10, 2003)

I think people *notice* big differences between individuals who form a couple. Those differences could be regarding looks, education level, jobs, age, etc. However, its a jump to go from noticing to caring, especially since in this case caring is code for some sort of moral pronouncement. Maybe a jump that's worth doing some private soul searching about.


----------



## Atticus (Nov 10, 2003)

As I pushed "submit" the irony of this thread lept at me. A dozen or more people, myself included, have expressed some level of outrage toward Lifetimer. As I look at it, I don't see a major distinction between our "concern" for his opinion and his concern with mismatched couples. We could have answered his question with a "yes" or "no".


----------



## mserychic (Oct 2, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Atticus said:


> As I pushed "submit" the irony of this thread lept at me. A dozen or more people, myself included, have expressed some level of outrage toward Lifetimer. As I look at it, I don't see a major distinction between our "concern" for his opinion and his concern with mismatched couples. We could have answered his question with a "yes" or "no".


My beef is how he's saying everyone does it to but just doesn't want to admit to it. Pisses me off when people decide what other people think.


----------



## Atticus (Nov 10, 2003)

It pisses me off, too, *mserychic.* Just speaking for me then, I don't see much difference between my anger and Lifetimer's. In both cases the situation is essentially none of my business, and "mismatched" couples harm nobody just as opinions about them, expressed on a forum like this, harm nobody.


----------



## Prodigal Son (Dec 11, 2005)

Sounds like jealousy and insecurity. Though I will admit if the man is like some fat slug and the woman is a barbie doll I throw up the WTF flag. Another part of me is like...good for you big guy. Almost all guys think the hot girl is to good for the guy she is dating. At least in most cases.


----------



## justlistening (Dec 4, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> *People have a hard time accepting it *because they want everything to be equal and just. That is not how the world works. Also, people who are unattractive - or BELIEVE they are unattractive - just don't like the idea of someone more attractive than them not interested in them.


Maybe, but apparently you have a hard time accepting that the saying says ''plenty of fish in the sea'' and not ''plenty of fish in our private pool of equal attractiveness''

And of course I don't like the idea that many attractive girls will consider themselves in a higher league than me and won't give me a second look, but I have no problem accepting that because I wouldn't be attracted to a girl with such an attitude anyway.


----------



## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

Wow this thread is STILL going??? :stu


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Atticus said:


> As I pushed "submit" the irony of this thread lept at me. A dozen or more people, myself included, have expressed some level of outrage toward Lifetimer. As I look at it, I don't see a major distinction between our "concern" for his opinion and his concern with mismatched couples. We could have answered his question with a "yes" or "no".


Good point, Atticus. I'll be shutting up now.

 Libby


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



mserychic said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > It's just common sense and the way things work. I didn't invent the rules, it's just the way it is (generally).
> ...


mserychic, what I believe or don't believe doesn't matter and has nothing to do with me trying to make it "common sense". It is ALREADY common sense and a fact. So it has nothing to do with what I believe, but instead it is just a common sense fact. Anyone with eyes and a brain can see what I say is true. And I used the wrong word in the quote you quoted me. It's not actually "rules" that I or anyone else follow. It is instead a universal law that is governing the world ... The law of Nature/the Law of Attraction.

As for the people disagreeing with me, there are MANY reasons people here are posting against what I am saying. Here are just SOME of the reasons:

1. In general, people just don't like the idea of someone pointing out the facts and evidence that it is a bad idea for mismatched couples to try to have a relationship with each other. They want the world to be a perfect and just world where everyone is on the exact same level. They want the very attractive and the very unattractive people - and all in between - to be one and the same. Yes, it's a nice thought, but that's just is not how nature - and the world - is (generally, of course there are exceptions to everything).

2. Another reason some are disagreeing is because a few here apparently are in a mismatched relationship and they of course are the most likely to post. Assuming they are being truthful and are not just trying to talk themselves into believing their relationship is doing great, then they are some of the exceptions in which they are a mismatched couple doing well. As I said, for every couple like that which are doing well, there are a dozen more NOT doing so well.

3. (Reason #3 I am copying and pasting here from a previous post of mine.) Yet another reason is because there are people who are unattractive - or BELIEVE they are unattractive - and they just don't like the idea of someone more attractive than them not interested in them. They therefore say things like, "It is wrong for someone to believe a man/or woman is going to have problems being with someone who is out of their league." That is because, even though they won't admit it, they don't like it that the much more attractive person is following the Law of Attraction and persuing people similar to themeselves (the attractive person) ... instead of persuing the less attractive person.

4. I am certain many people that DO agree with me, but are afraid to post their agreeance because it is not "Politically Correct" or "the right thing to say." They don't want to be the go against the crowd (the several here that have disagreed), for fear of looking like a "bad person." I say to these people, don't let others bully you into not saying what you think! Even though Prodigal Son and Sprinter didn't necessarily say they totally agreed with me, they were men enough to stand up, go against the crowd and not be bullied into saying everything that is "supposed" to be said. I knew people were not going to like what I say, because it goes against what they would like to believe &#8230; what they would like the world to believe. However, I have the valid reasons on my side as to why I know it is a bad idea for mismatched couples to be in a relationship. Because of their feelings and emotions about this subject, people here will still try to shoot down what I have pointed out, but the facts are the facts and we cannot change them.

I could go on and on with peoples' motives for posting against the truth I've been saying. Again, it is not what I think, it's just *is* what it *is*! If people can put aside their feelings and emotions about it ... if they stop WANTING something to be true and see what IS true ... and if they use their common sense, their logic, and their eyes, they will KNOW I am just speaking how things are. I am just the messenger. I know some here want to "kill the messenger", but that will not make the message any less truthful.

No matter what ANYONE (myself included) believes, it's just not going to change the Universal Law.

Lifetimer


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



libbyberk83 said:


> Atticus said:
> 
> 
> > As I pushed "submit" the irony of this thread lept at me. A dozen or more people, myself included, have expressed some level of outrage toward Lifetimer. As I look at it, I don't see a major distinction between our "concern" for his opinion and his concern with mismatched couples. We could have answered his question with a "yes" or "no".
> ...


Libby, I'm sad to hear that  , because I still think you are one of the more prettier girls here and I enjoy seeing you.

:sigh I just can't fight that law of nature.

Lifetimer


----------



## Atticus (Nov 10, 2003)

*Libbyberk83*, please stop shutting up, if that makes sense. :lol I was just observing, and I didn't mean to censor anyone, except possibly myself. And the rest of this post will demonstrtae that I failed in that effort.

And based on lifetimer's last post, I've decided you're right *mserychic*, and I'm reversing my stance, irony or no.

So *lifetimer*, you've described yourself as good looking, and you seem concerned primarily or exclusively with good looking women who date or marry "dorky" men. Could it be that you want your looks to matter more than they do? Could you possibly feel the certainty of your "laws of attraction" chipped away at by these mismatched couples, and this threatens your relatively privileged position looks-wise? Its called cognitive dissonance, and its a real ***** to work through.


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

Haha, that's what I was going to say.

Lifetimer seems to think that he has more right to the prettier girls because he blindly follows a ****ed up, highly corrupted, eating disorder inducing, sexually overcharged culture and is *****ing because he has found several people who actually have a basic understanding of morality and choose to ignore the media's pressure to judge others based on superficialities (which is why many of us have social anxiety to begin with).

Who's cute now?


----------



## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> 1. In general, people just don't like the idea of someone pointing out the facts and evidence that it is a bad idea for mismatched couples to try to have a relationship with each other.


You have not presented any facts or evidence in any of your posts, which I have just skimmed over to refresh myself on your stance. You claim your "laws of attraction" are "common sense" but rather its based on assumption that "like attracts like". While there may be some truth to that , the opposite applies also. MseryChic is correct in saying that just because its your perception of how things "should" be does not make it common sense.



> Another reason some are disagreeing is because a few here apparently are in a mismatched relationship and they of course are the most likely to post. Assuming they are being truthful and are not just trying to talk themselves into believing their relationship is doing great, then they are some of the exceptions to a mismatched couple doing well. As I said, for every couple like that which are doing well, there are a dozen more NOT doing so well.


Here's another laughable excerpt....I am one of those who posted about being "mismatched"...I post quite a bit on this board and am COMPLETELY honest, why on earth would I NOT BE??? I am an anonymous person from Yourtown, USA what gain would there be in not being honest? Its quite an assumption on your part, and rather arrogant I might add, to think that anyone would lie to try and lie to impress anyone* in this thread* (lets get that part straight, we are talking about here and now not the internet in general)when they speak a point that is contrary to yours. How do I know you are the "good looking" person you are claiming to be?? You could just be saying that and trying to talk yourself into it...In my 2000+ posts if I were coming on this board continually lying about this and that, I think I would have been called on it MANY TIMES by now.

I am married, have been for going on 6 years, very happy, and its frankly not any of your business or anyone else's to stand in judgement of my relationship. I am not an EXCEPTION as you like to call it but rather someone with the maturity to know life is a lot of gray area, not a simple black and white where we can conveniently place others in a neat little packages and define them.



> I am certain many people that DO agree with me, but are afraid to post their agreeance because it is not "Politically Correct" or "the right thing to say." They don't want to be the go against the crowd (the several here that have disagreed), for fear of looking like a "bad person." I say to these people, don't let others bully you into not saying what you think! Even though Prodigal Son and Sprinter didn't necessarily say they totally agreed with me, they were men enough to stand up, go against the crowd and not be bullied into saying everything that is "supposed" to be said. I knew people were not going to like what I say, because it goes against what they would like to believe &#8230; what they would like the world to believe. However, I have the valid reasons on my side as to why I know it is a bad idea for mismatched couples to be in a relationship. Because of their feelings and emotions about this subject, people here will still try to shoot down what I have pointed out, but the facts are the facts and we cannot change them.


I have been posting here long enough and know lots of the names on this thread, maybe not personally exchanging PMs or whatever but enough to know that they are people who speak their minds freely. No one is bullying anyone here except maybe perhaps you. You are claiming that your distorted views are "common sense". You have SEVERAL people telling you that is not the case. You refuse to accept that perhaps there is flaws in YOUR logic. One might think you are being argumentive and contrary just to garner attention for yourself.

The first sign of REALLY growing up is realizing that maybe YOU DONT know everything and you start LISTENING, really listening to others and reject the notion that everything can convenitnely be put in simplified catagories.



> No matter what ANYONE (myself included) believes, it's just not going to change the Universal Law.


There is NO universal law when it comes to love...the simple fact that you seem not to know that shows your inexperience on the subject..

:kiss Go ahead and start Flaming..... :b


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Penny said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > 1. In general, people just don't like the idea of someone pointing out the facts and evidence that it is a bad idea for mismatched couples to try to have a relationship with each other.
> ...


First of all, it IS common sense. I don't understand how anyone cannot see that. How can people not use their brain - and their eyes - and see for themselves? Secondly, you may want to ignore what is obvious, but you just can't ignore the facts. I just gave 2 studies that supported my stance and that CAN"T be ignored. I have seen other articles and studies that support in some form or fashion that what I've been saying is true. However, I just haven't kept those articles laying around because I figured they were just common sense things that I already pretty much knew. As you can tell, I'm really into psychology, scientific studies and things of that nature. lol. I am not doing this to, as you say, "garner attention" to myself. In fact, I would've preferred someone else had brought this info up because I knew people would react strongly to it -- for the reasons I mentioned in a previous post. The truth often causes strong reactions.

Remember, it's not what *I* say, but instead it is: Universal law, scientific studies and just good common sense.

Now, Go ahead and start ignoring the evidence and the truth..... :b

Lifetimer

P.S - I'm sorry for the several edits. Mis-spelled words will do that. ops


----------



## mserychic (Oct 2, 2004)

You have quite the ego on you don't you?


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



libbyberk83 said:


> Who's cute now?


Libby, it really is a shame you changed your avatar to some 4-legged animal. It was one of the things I had looked forward to when visiting this thread. You ask, "Who's cute now?" Well, you still truly are.

If your new avatar is you after the clock strikes midnight each night, then I may have to re-think my feelings.....

Lifetimer


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

_That_ is what you respond to out of my post?

Lovely.

Doesn't take a full moon to bring out the teeth. Just some good old prejudice, which I have yet to see any "facts" on (and I sincerely hope you don't think that stats are the same as facts... because 95% of people think America is a good place to live, when the numbers are pulled from Beverly Hills)


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



libbyberk83 said:


> _That_ is what you respond to out of my post?
> 
> Lovely.
> 
> Doesn't take a full moon to bring out the teeth. Just some good old prejudice, which I have yet to see any "facts" on (and I sincerely hope you don't think that stats are the same as facts... because 95% of people think America is a good place to live, when the numbers are pulled from Beverly Hills)


Libby, you mean only 95% think America is a great place to live? That study MUST be inaccurate, I figured it would be closer to 99%! That's because it seems that just about everyone from outside of the United States are doing everything they can to move here ... as opposed to moving to any other country in the world. That speaks volumes.

The U.S. isn't perfect. No country is. But it is the country where more people want to live than any other country on earth.

Hey, Libby, I'm starting to get use to your new avatar. Just be sure to use the fangs wisely. 

Lifetimer


----------



## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

Wow.. :eek .hook onto this one Libby...he's a keeper!!! :b  


Between your "99%" of people thinking America is a great place to live and your weak "studies" that you vaguely quote I am not even going to bother doing the quote-by-quote reply. Its obvious you have certain ideas instilled in your mind that you refuse to shake, despite the vast amount of people that are telling you otherwise. Quite frankly, I think that someone like you who has the gall to say people who dont "match" IN YOUR MIND should not be together, and then to even imply they have "fooled" themselves into "thinking" they are happy is very sad....who someone loves or is with is none of your damn business...why dont you get that part...you have presented NO EVIDENCE to support your claim, around here when you pull out "facts" its better to present links and such to support your rather weak argument. Love is not a science, despite attempts to make it so. Why do you or anyone else including the government (i.e. gay marriage) have the right to say who someone can live with, be with, or sleep with????


----------



## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> Libby, you mean only 95% think America is a great place to live? That study MUST be inaccurate, I figured it would be closer to 99%! That's because it seems that just about everyone from outside of the United States are doing everything they can to move here ... as opposed to moving to any other country in the world. That speaks volumes.
> 
> The U.S. isn't perfect. No country is. But it is the country where more people want to live than any other country on earth.


I wouldn't be so sure. You might want to travel around the world a little.

There are a lot of things that are good about the US, but sometimes other countries do things better.


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

That isn't a real stat. I was making a ****ing point.

And your idea of attractiveness is pretty ****ed up anyway if you believe me to be attractive. So all around, you lose this argument.

:b


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Penny said:


> Quite frankly, I think that someone like you who has the gall to say people who dont "match" IN YOUR MIND should not be together, and then to even imply they have "fooled" themselves into "thinking" they are happy is very sad....who someone loves or is with is none of your damn business...why dont you get that part...you have presented NO EVIDENCE to support your claim, around here when you pull out "facts" its better to present links and such to support your rather weak argument.


As I said many times here, it's not so much MY thoughts about it, but that's just how it is here on planet earth. I HAVE presented evidence here. I also told of evidence/studies I've seen but I don't have the link to. In fact, in that first the study I referred to is one that I don't think was on the internet. I think it was in a magazine where I seen it. I wish there was a link to the article, but there just isn't (that I know about). If I spent time and energy doing searches for more evidence, then I'm sure I could find more. Yes, you can focus on the minority of mismatched couples doing well, but again, they are the in the minority. However, the fact is that the majority of people you see on the streets are evenly matched (or at least, close to it), and that just shows the studies I presented ring true. And as for people who "fool themselves", I didn't say ALL mismatched couples fool themselves, but I think a lot of them do. In fact, some correctly matched couples ALSO fool themselves into thinking their relationship is great. Not every realtionship is going to work out perfectly - whether it's a matched or mismatched relationship. I'm just saying - in regards to people fooling themselves - that it is much higher in mismatched couples than matched.

It's time to stop trying to kill the messenger :duel and instead, just know and accept how the world and life generally works.

Lifetimer


----------



## nothing_to_say (Nov 21, 2006)




----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Classified said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > Libby, you mean only 95% think America is a great place to live? That study MUST be inaccurate, I figured it would be closer to 99%! That's because it seems that just about everyone from outside of the United States are doing everything they can to move here ... as opposed to moving to any other country in the world. That speaks volumes.
> ...


Hi Classified,

Yes, I agree. I have seen stories about how other countries do certain things better than the U.S., but as I said, no country is perfect. You can look at the United States and point out and focus on the bad things. But, that also can be said about any country in the world. If every aspect of life is taken into consideration, then it is easy to see why the United States is generally the most sought after country in which people from other parts of the world want to move to. There are people LITERALLY dying to come here. I don't see people risking their lives to become a citizen of some other country.

No, the U.S. isn't perfect, but there isn't another country on earth I would rather live.

Lifetimer


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



libbyberk83 said:


> And your idea of attractiveness is pretty @#%$ up anyway if you believe me to be attractive. So all around, you lose this argument.
> 
> :b


Libby, if you could somehow raise your self-esteem to match your attractiveness, you would be unstoppable. I told you what I believe, I just can't figure out why you don't see it.

I guess it's just an effect from the SA. I believe myself to be at least a decent looking/nice looking guy, but I admit I'm not exactly out there making my way in this world, having relationships, etc. And I attribute that to my SA. I guess it's something we all have to continue to work on.

Lifetimer


----------



## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

Lifetimer said:


> I guess it's just an effect from the SA. I believe myself to be at least a decent looking/nice looking guy, *but I admit I'm not exactly out there making my way in this world, having relationships*, etc. And I attribute that to my SA. I guess it's something we all have to continue to work on.
> 
> Lifetimer


Okay so you, who is NOT HAVING relationships by your own admission are the resident expert of SAS on who should be together, and you are the expert on "how life works"....glad you can educate this married 38 year old on how the world works...

Allright enough is enough....I think the beating the dead horse emoticon says it all (which I love BTW, I got a good laugh out of that).


----------



## SilentProphet (Jun 1, 2007)

I need to find me a short girl cause i'm only 5'5"  what a mismatch that would be if i dated a girl who was taller then me. Plus it just looks pretty ridiculous. :sigh


----------



## justlistening (Dec 4, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> it is easy to see why the United States is generally the most sought after country in which people from other parts of the world want to move to. *There are people LITERALLY dying to come here. *


Yeah, the fact that people are willing to die proves how much they prefer that country above all the other countries in the world. Those people are obviously in a position with a lot of options.


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

... and on and on it goes...

opcorn


----------



## Mayflower 2000 (Nov 11, 2003)

People literally die, and knowingly risk their lives to enter China! Of all places. It doesn't mean anything. So many people come here because we grant so many visas.


----------



## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Mayflower 2000 said:


> People literally die, and knowingly risk their lives to enter China! Of all places. It doesn't mean anything. So many people come here because we grant so many visas.


A lot of those people are fleeing North Korea probably.


----------



## Atticus (Nov 10, 2003)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Classified said:


> A lot of those people are fleeing North Korea probably.


But will the North Koreans be considered good looking in China? 
Huh? That's what I wanna know :fall .


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> Libby, you mean only 95% think America is a great place to live? That study MUST be inaccurate, I figured it would be closer to 99%! That's because it seems that just about everyone from outside of the United States are doing everything they can to move here ... as opposed to moving to any other country in the world. That speaks volumes.
> 
> The U.S. isn't perfect. No country is. But it is the country where more people want to live than any other country on earth.
> 
> Lifetimer


I agree.


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> libbyberk83 said:
> 
> 
> > And your idea of attractiveness is pretty @#%$ up anyway if you believe me to be attractive. So all around, you lose this argument.
> ...


I totally agree with this too.


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

You're on the wrong side, Stan. :lol


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



libbyberk83 said:


> You're on the wrong side, Stan. :lol


Well all of us fellas keep telling you that you're gorgeous but you can't get it through your thick head.


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

Why is this thread so off-topic?

I love Atticus' question:



> But will the North Koreans be considered good looking in China?
> Huh? That's what I wanna know.


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



libbyberk83 said:


> Why is this thread so off-topic?


It's your fault.


----------



## Shauna The Dead (Jun 16, 2005)

I notice sometimes if people don't seem to "match" physically...but maybe they match mentally? :stu And it doesn't actually annoy me...unless it's somebody I like or something and think I would make a better couple with them than the person they're with. :b But that's the only time it bothers me...aside from the fact that sometimes couples annoy me, period, when I'm single. :stu


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



srschirm said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > Libby, you mean only 95% think America is a great place to live? That study MUST be inaccurate, I figured it would be closer to 99%! That's because it seems that just about everyone from outside of the United States are doing everything they can to move here ... as opposed to moving to any other country in the world. That speaks volumes.
> ...





srschirm said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > libbyberk83 said:
> ...


Has someone ACTUALLY agreed with me on this thread?? :fall

Lifetimer


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Penny said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > I guess it's just an effect from the SA. I believe myself to be at least a decent looking/nice looking guy, *but I admit I'm not exactly out there making my way in this world, having relationships*, etc. And I attribute that to my SA. I guess it's something we all have to continue to work on.
> ...


Just having relationship experience doesn't mean a heck of a lot. Look, how many people have been married and divorced several times? Did all that "relationship experience" help them? I believe in many cases, had they seen the studies ... or just used their common sense wisdom, as I have spoken of here in this thread - then they could have increased their chances of avoiding failure by making sure their potential mate matched them well.

It's great to follow your heart, but even better to also use your head. I think Confucious may have said that. Then again, maybe not.

And now I will address the lack of my relationship experience.

The fact that I am not out there having relationships has NOTHING to do with what I have said (or the FACTS I have presented).

There have been many great coaches who were not great atheletes themselves (Vince Lombardi, Casey Stengel, Red Auerbach, etc.). The common thread among all these great coaches is that they knew what they were talking about.

John Madden (the now sports broadcaster) coached the Oakland Raiders to the Super Bowl and had a very high career winning percentage as a coach. He is now considered among the greatest coaches of all time. But you know what? He NEVER played a single minute in the NFL, but he is regarded as among the best NFL coaches of all time. Same with me. I don't have the relationship experience, but I am smart enough to know what I am talking about (and back it up with facts and common sense).

Just call me the John Madden of love. 8)

Lifetimer


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> Has someone ACTUALLY agreed with me on this thread?? :fall
> 
> Lifetimer


I don't agree with your original post, but I do agree with those last couple. :yes


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



srschirm said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > Has someone ACTUALLY agreed with me on this thread?? :fall
> ...


Yes, I understand. But, hey, maybe it will get the ball rolling. 

Lifetimer


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

Way to work those great coaches in your argument, too. :nw


----------



## njodis (Nov 8, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Lifetimer said:


> Just call me the John Madden of love. 8)
> Lifetimer


 :roll


----------



## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Classified said:


> Lifetimer said:
> 
> 
> > Libby, you mean only 95% think America is a great place to live? That study MUST be inaccurate, I figured it would be closer to 99%! That's because it seems that just about everyone from outside of the United States are doing everything they can to move here ... as opposed to moving to any other country in the world. That speaks volumes.
> ...


No kidding. You really think everyone from outside the US wants to move to your country? Holy sh*t are you ever deluded.


----------



## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

No facts presented here, you recalling a magazine article you read at some point in your life hardly counts as FACTS, and I find the analogy of football coaches to this particular subject ridiculous (surprised that srschirm thought that was somehow a winning point :stu), love is hardly like a game of football, and the fact you dont know that shows your ignorance but whatever, I am really bored with this thread at this point. 

Anyone can post "I am right, its a fact, its common sense", etc etc...(which is, I am sure, what you will do)...its common sense to you and apparently srschirm but you dont even seem to know the meaning of what "common sense" is, or what a fact is. 

The bottom line is you claim that unless people you dont even know meet some kind of matching criteria you have set up in your own mind they shouldnt be together and couldnt possibly be happy which is really stupid, sorry to say, and you disregarded the many other opinions on here, the majority of who have told you that you are way off base, but you are just going to go on and on and on despite all else....

:yawn 


And oh, PS, like Zephyr, I think you are deluded to think that nearly all people in other countries want to move here...


----------



## Your Lover Scrub Ducky (Jul 26, 2004)

I skimmed the first few pages and then got some cookies and by the time I came back, I didnt feel like reading anymore. But from what I did read, I pretty much agree with what mserychic was saying.

We have to be _somewhat_ physically attracted to a mate but there is so much more to a person than appearance that can make them attractive or unattractive...Actually I think personality makes/breaks looks to tell you the truth.

Damn, these cookies are good.


----------



## Zephyr (Nov 8, 2003)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Penny said:


> And oh, PS, like Zephyr, I think you are deluded to think that nearly all people in other countries want to move here...


You're agreeing with me a lot lately. Are you feeling all right? :lol


----------



## LostinReverie (Mar 18, 2007)

Ya didn't miss much, duck.


----------



## WineKitty (Nov 26, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Zephyr said:


> Penny said:
> 
> 
> > And oh, PS, like Zephyr, I think you are deluded to think that nearly all people in other countries want to move here...
> ...


You and I dont agree on everything Zephyr...not by a long shot...but overall you are allright in my book!!!!!!!!!! :kiss


----------



## Lifetimer (May 16, 2004)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Penny said:


> No facts presented here, you recalling a magazine article you read at some point in your life hardly counts as FACTS, and I find the analogy of football coaches to this particular subject ridiculous (surprised that srschirm thought that was somehow a winning point :stu), love is hardly like a game of football, and the fact you dont know that shows your ignorance but whatever, I am really bored with this thread at this point.
> 
> Anyone can post "I am right, its a fact, its common sense", etc etc...(which is, I am sure, what you will do)...its common sense to you and apparently srschirm but you dont even seem to know the meaning of what "common sense" is, or what a fact is.
> 
> ...


I guess we will just have to agree to disagree here. The real "bottom line" is that I can post an unlimited number of facts here to overwhelmingly support what I've been saying and it obviously just won't be enough. Instead of people believing what is true, they instead try to make true what they believe. As for me, give me truth over fantasy.

The Universal Law will always rule.

Lifetimer


----------



## dez (Jun 25, 2005)

I didn't think I'd have the patience to read through this entire thread but the argument kept me intrigued. I actually knew someone briefly who held similar beliefs as Lifetimer in regards to the annoyance of seeing mismatched couples and I found it to be nauseating. What good can come of it? For the most part I believe this sort of thinking stems from people's own personal frustration, perhaps they should shift their focus on fixing their own problems rather than accessing these "mismatched" pairs.


----------



## srschirm (Jun 25, 2006)

*Re: re: Am I the only one annoyed by seeing mismatched coupl*



Penny said:


> (surprised that srschirm thought that was somehow a winning point :stu)...


I was mainly admiring his sports reference.


----------

