# roommates talk about me



## george costanza (Mar 7, 2015)

i posted about this about a month ago, but i'll recap a bit. my college roommates started excluding me this semester out of nowhere. they make plans and go places without talking to me or inviting me, which i know they're not obligated to but we used to be so close. i saw on one of their phones that they have a group chat for all of them that i never knew about and i assume thats how they make plans without me knowing about them. my childhood best friend who has cf recently had a health scare (almost died) and none of my roommates could be bothered to ask how im doing or even reply when i told them. the funny thing is that they treated the roommate i share a bedroom with like this last semester and shes now participating. 

now its even worse. they always have their friend in our room and when i say hi he gives me the coldest response and always gives me dirty looks. he gives such a bad vibe to me but is so friendly with everyone else in our suite. the thing is he used to be nice to me when we as a group first met him, so i have to wonder what my roommates say about me to him. 

two of my roommates have stopped saying hi to me, making it really awkward to be in the kitchen with them. sometimes ill say hi from my room when they get back from class but they dont respond. theyve also stopped responding if i text them and no longer like any of my (rare) pictures on instagram, which i know seems petty but it bothers me nonetheless. gotta love social media for making it even easier to isolate someone. 

today i woke up and decided to walk about four miles to battery park without my roommates, because i would just end up trailing behind them because they ignore me. after, i was in the hall outside of our door and i could hear them talking about a girl. they were saying things like "im so done with her" and talking about what she eats. i cant help but think that they were talking about me because ive been dieting and recently got sick twice after eating cheesy foods, so i've been avoiding them. i've only mentioned this once so i dont understand why they would be annoyed. 

ive tried to stop feeling sad about this, but whenever something happens it bothers me again. mostly im confused because i clean up after myself, im not loud, and im friendly to everyone here. 

ps. thanks for reading this long *** post if you made it this far


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## chompers (Feb 3, 2015)

yeah this sucks.

It sounds like your roommates don't like you, who knows why, but it doesn't sound like an oversensitivity or all in your head thing. It's so useless trying to imagine what other people are thinking because it takes up so much time and you'll never get it right. So stop wasting your time wondering wtf is up with these jerks. By this point I would think you should be done with them, as they are being so awful to you. Here's my advice

1. If you do want to reconcile, or attempt to, then you'll have to sit down with these people and straight up ask them what's their problem, and then if it is an actual thing that's reasonable, you'll have to apologize. This involves talking, expressing your feelings and making yourself vulnerable. So don't do it unless you really think they deserve it, and it sounds like they don't

2. Move out. Of course you can't just ignore people who are passive aggressive and treating you like garbage any time you're at home. You have to get away from these people, so you can stop being an unwilling participant in their drama and headgames. In the meantime, try to keep to yourself and be civil when you can't. Just treat them like strangers that you have to interact with, be polite, say hi and leave it at that.

good luck!


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