# SAS Friends Requests From People You've Never Talked To?



## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

I get loads of these, and while I am sure they are well intentioned it is beginning to grate.

I cannot be your _friend_ if I have never posted in one of your threads nor you in one of mine, there have been no vistior messages between us, no PM's, indeed no form of communication whatsoever on or off this forum. I think carefully about who I add to my friendslist, I don't see it as some sort of competition to get the highest number, though possibly this is partially why people I've never heard of keep adding me.

Anyhow, how do _you_ respond to out-of-the-blue friends requests? Rock the vote!


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## Ape in space (May 31, 2010)

I accept unconditionally. 

They might want to talk to you, but are too afraid to send a message, so maybe they're hoping you'll send them a message first. Or maybe they just want easy access to you.


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## MindOverMood (Dec 12, 2009)

I don't mind accepting them. I just don't accept friend requests from people who deleted me off their list in the first place. I do not forget:b


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## Glacial (Jun 16, 2010)

In the past, I have accepted them, but then learned you never even hear from the people; so now, I just view it as people trying to increase their number of friends and I will reject them unless they correspond with me first--I think that's fair.


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

I accept all requests, this isn't Facebook. If you want to be my friend, I will thank you for wanting so.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Gawd, I'm sorry I tried to friend you..you didn't have to make a thread about it. :b


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## Elleire (Jul 24, 2011)

I don't care why they're adding me- that they want to is reason enough for me to accept. It does me no harm.


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## lynnb (May 10, 2011)

I don't mind. I accept them. I figure more friends are better.


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## Diacetylmorphine (Mar 9, 2011)

I don't mind.
Everyone is welcome to be my friend!

In fact I'm flattered they'd find me interesting enough to send a friend request in the first place, unless it's just a random add thing.


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## Annie K (Sep 24, 2008)

I'm always happy to get friend requests on here. I accept everyone.


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## successful (Mar 21, 2009)

Accept


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

Always accept, does no harm in any way and I certainly wouldn't want to be rejecting a request like that on a forum like this and have people potentially worrying about why they were rejected and overanalysing or something.


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## Paul (Sep 26, 2005)

I accept, and then if they never talk to me after that I usually remove them months later.

I take it as their way of indicating they think it'd be nice to talk. They may not have the nerve to initiate. Sometimes I'll say something to them, though usually I don't have the nerve to initiate either. Even so it's a nice compliment.


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## watashi (Feb 6, 2008)

I accept them all, even though some of them never try to talk to me after adding me.


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## i just want luv (Feb 13, 2011)

accept with the quickness


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## rainbowOne (Sep 26, 2010)

I accept alllll friend requests I get. Yeah I tend to do a little profile-stalking first but then I'll always accept them. Why not? 
I don't really see any reason to reject a friend request, there's nothing on my profile that can be seen by contacts only, so it doesn't make much of a difference.


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## veron (Apr 29, 2009)

I've sent a friend request to the OP. Now eagerly awaiting rejection :boogie

Btw, to answer the question, I tend to accept all requests. Online friendship requests is not something I take too seriously, so add me, don't add me, remove me, or not, I don't really care.


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## tlgibson97 (Sep 24, 2009)

I would accept anyone that wanted to be my friend. I feel creepy for some reason requesting to be friends so I wait for other people to want to be friends. It doesn't bother me that nobody wants to.


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## Fenren (Sep 20, 2009)

I accept them on the rare occasion I get them.
But usually, I'm the creep sending the requests to others I haven't already interacted with!:teeth


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## RockIt (Jan 8, 2011)

The way I look at it is that somehow they can relate to you or share a similar interest, etc. We are all here because we have SA, so that common bond alone can make people feel comfortable enough to send a friend request. Some users probably do profile scanning and see what they share in common with another person: age, music interests, etc. Good match = friend request. Just like facebook, there are those who add friends 5x a week and there are those who add them 5x a year, even with similar volumes of requests.

At any rate, I don't have an issue accepting anyone to my friends list if they seem like someone I would friend in real life. If they get added and start to act like an idiot here at SAS, I can always drop them from my list later.


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## lucyinthesky (Mar 29, 2009)

Haha Ste, nice thread. I automatically reject people I've never spoken to and don't ever add anyone on here because I'm a horrible person D:/it makes me nervous for some reason :b


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## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

veron said:


> I've sent a friend request to the OP. Now eagerly awaiting rejection :boogie
> 
> Btw, to answer the question, I tend to accept all requests. Online friendship requests is not something I take too seriously, so add me, don't add me, remove me, or not, I don't really care.


Rejected _and_ put on ignore list


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## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

The consensus seems to be that it's best to just accept anyone who adds you.

I don't get this, to me it seems disrespectful to my genuine friends to have just anyone on my *friends* list, and disrespectful of some stranger to presume I want to be friends with them when we have never talked. "Hey, you don't know me but I'm awesome so you should totally be my friend." I won't devalue my actual friendships with people on here by caving in to this type of spam.

I don't have a very high-criteria, if we are like-minded or like similar music or film or literature, or had a debate in some thread or just exchanged a couple of visitor messages then I will gladly add someone. But to _presume_ it's OK to harass someone who doesn't know you into being your friend just seems trollish to me. You wouldn't walk up to someone IRL and be like "Hey be my friend!" without introducing yourself first.


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## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

lucyinthesky said:


> Haha Ste, nice thread. I automatically reject people I've never spoken to and don't ever add anyone on here because I'm a horrible person D:/it makes me nervous for some reason :b


D'aww, yeah I used to feel bad about 'rejecting' someone with anxiety but I lost my humanity when they started getting into double figures if I leave SAS alone for a day or two. I dunno why I am so popular with people I don't know, as far as I'm aware the popular perception of me on SAS is that I am arrogant, condescending and evil.


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## Still Waters (Sep 18, 2008)

I accept any requests. I do however,on occasion get aggravated when the list feels up with people I've NEVER spoken to and will do a slash and burn - Deleting those I've never spoken with. Immature? Yes,but it feels oddly soooo good! I had a friend on my list for a long time,many pms sent back and forth-he would NEVER initiate them so - boom -OFF WITH HIS HEAD!


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## lucyinthesky (Mar 29, 2009)

Resonance said:


> D'aww, yeah I used to feel bad about 'rejecting' someone with anxiety but I lost my humanity when they started getting into double figures if I leave SAS alone for a day or two. I dunno why I am so popular with people I don't know, as far as I'm aware the popular perception of me on SAS is that I am arrogant, condescending and evil.


Not having an avatar pic means being ignored :yes It's your hat Stevie, men and women alike cannot resist. You're not arrogant, condescending or evil though as far as I'm aware :b I'm less liked, haha. Maybe someone is spreading nasty rumours about the London Mk1 group  Ha.


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## xTKsaucex (Jun 23, 2010)

Don't know what to say that to be honest. I guess those on my friends list I don't particularly keep in touch with only because I find websites like this hard to have a decent conversation on without filling up the message box to high levels. I wouldn't reject anyone though, bit harsh from my point of view as its amazing how much one rejection post can leave you paranoid or unwanted etc so wouldn't dream of putting anyone in that situation. 

As for blocking you would have to really get on my t**s to annoy me to the point of blocking and even then you would know it yourself.

Although I do understand the out of the blue ones when someone adds you and goes 'Hey, I see you like Kill Bill' or something and the first thing that goes through your mind is 'Hey... who the hell are you?' But I still add them. It can be amusing talking to randoms.


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## Ape in space (May 31, 2010)

Resonance said:


> You wouldn't walk up to someone IRL and be like "Hey be my friend!" without introducing yourself first.


I would if I knew for sure that they would accept.


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## Ventura (May 5, 2009)




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## Fenren (Sep 20, 2009)

NES said:


>


Bwahahaha!


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## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

NES said:


>


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## xTKsaucex (Jun 23, 2010)

^ :b Its like the people on youtube who post 'I don't understand why that comment got a thumbs up?' and then that comment gets 75 thumbs up or something.


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## Ventura (May 5, 2009)

Resonance said:


>


This could be a starting of a beautiful friendship.


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## Tugwahquah (Apr 13, 2011)

Most of my Sas friends never initiate conversation even when I try to. I would never delete them though, cause i wouldnt want to deleted. I just assume they are as nervous and shy as I am, or dont know what to say or not to say. . I like quiet people anyhow. I treasure the ones that do talk to me. I just wonder what the heck they must think of me, or if im boring them. Its very exciting when they write back :clap


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

The only time I don't accept a friend request is when they joined two days ago, have three posts, and 96 friends.

Other than that, always accept.


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## whiterabbit (Jan 20, 2006)

haha, I'm such an arsehole. I've rejected every friend request I've ever received.


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## Hadron92 (Apr 17, 2009)

I accept them. 

The friend thing on here seems pointless, anyway.


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## Scrub-Zero (Feb 9, 2004)

I accept and delete most later, like on Facebook.


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## Escape Artist (Aug 23, 2011)

Just got my first friend request. Brightened my day. :yay


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## anonymid (Oct 16, 2005)

I always accept. It's totally harmless, and I'd feel like I was being rude if I rejected somebody.


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## purplefruit (Jan 11, 2011)

always accept, don't see a reason not to


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## laura024 (Aug 11, 2006)

I always accept too. I don't take the whole friends thing strictly.


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## Rest or Real? (Apr 1, 2011)

laura024 said:


> I always accept too. I don't take the whole friends thing strictly.


THIS.
That means I agree wholeheartedly, the whole caps lock deal.


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## JimmyDeansRetartedCousin (Nov 28, 2009)

Chill your boots man, they don't mean anything.


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## Lasair (Jan 25, 2010)

I think I have 6 friends...maybe less...but I only add if I have talked to the persona and if I intend to talk to them again....I hate have adds unless I have a proper contact


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## au Lait (Sep 8, 2010)

I always accept, even if I've never talked to the person before.

The way I see it, sending someone a friend request is also a way to acknowledge that you like/appreciate that person's posts. 

I mean, this is an SA forum, after all. They may enjoy your posts or want to get to know you better, but are too shy to initiate a conversation. So sending a friend request can be an easier way of letting the person know, "hey I think you're cool."


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## Resonance (Feb 11, 2010)

au Lait said:


> I always accept, even if I've never talked to the person before.
> 
> The way I see it, sending someone a friend request is also a way to acknowledge that you like/appreciate that person's posts.
> 
> I mean, this is an SA forum, after all. They may enjoy your posts or want to get to know you better, but are too shy to initiate a conversation. So sending a friend request can be an easier way of letting the person know, "hey I think you're cool."


I get the feeling that people who never talk to me before or after (Yeah, I used to accept all the random friends requests too until the numbers got ridiculous, guess I must be super cool or something) don't even bother to check whether or not I accepted their request.

I dunno, maybe I'm just incredibly bitter but I feel it devalues friendship to just shoot off requests all over the place to random people. Really it just kind of annoys me when I log in and there's like a bold *11* in the top right and I think "Yay, quotes, PM's, visitor messages!" and more than half turn out to be friend requests from people who I have never once interacted with, many with like 2 posts who've been on the site for like a day.


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## GunnyHighway (Sep 28, 2010)

I accept them. It almost never happens though.


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## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

I rarely get friend requests, but I usually don't accept. No offense to the requester! I'm not good with friends, imaginary forum ones or not.


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## pollster (Oct 4, 2009)

phoelomek said:


> I don't care why they're adding me- that they want to is reason enough for me to accept. It does me no harm.


Pretty much this.

It's not like something bad will happen to me if I accept someone as a friend who has never and will never interact with me. Whatever.


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## JustKittenRightMeow (Jul 25, 2011)

I accept because I feel special when I receive one.I rarely talk to the people that add me but that doesn't bother me too much.


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## estse (Nov 18, 2003)

> Really it just kind of annoys me when I log in and there's like a bold *11* in the top right and I think "Yay, quotes, PM's, visitor messages!" and more than half turn out to be friend requests from people who I have never once interacted with, many with like 2 posts who've been on the site for like a day.


I think the highest number I had was *3*, and that was when I received three consecutive infractions.


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## strawberryjulius (Jun 28, 2009)

I usually just accept them. Doesn't really mean much to me.


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## 0lly (Aug 3, 2011)

Unconditional acceptance, doesn't happen too often though .


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## Cheesecake (Feb 2, 2007)

Don't want to offend anybody, so I accept those friend requests.


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## Dane (Jul 27, 2009)

I always accept, not that I get that many requests. (I think I have six friends, total). 

I always check the person's profile and posts though, just out of curiosity.


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## ThisGuy (Jul 13, 2010)

strawberryjulius said:


> I usually just accept them. Doesn't really mean much to me.


Same.

----------------------------------------------------

Though when I send someone here a friend request, it's usually because I enjoy reading their posts, or noticed them around the forums and wanted to get to know them. But that usually never ends up happening. I just couldn't reject a FR or delete a friend here.

...I'm not guilty. :b


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## Conquistador954 (May 15, 2011)

I'm usually the one sending out the requests. I have to be. To most people here i'm still kinda new so no one's gonna be friend requesting me. I was a bit nervous about doing it at first, but i figured the worst thing they can do is not accept. And the rare occasion i DO get the request, i ALWAYS accept, no questions asked.


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## Wacky Wednesdays (Apr 10, 2011)

I don't even think about friend count, have like 6 friends. And I've communicated with them all - either indirectly via threads and also through other means...regardless, I would accept any friend request, this is a freaking SA forum ffs, people want to be accepted!!!!!!!!!!!


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## Fantas Eyes (Mar 23, 2011)

I accept all friend requests; people want to feel accepted.


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## Addler (Apr 28, 2011)

I accept them, and I also read up on them to see if they've posted on/been in threads with me, just because I wonder what interest they could have in me. I've requested adds with people I've never commented on because I liked reading their posts but was too afraid to say anything, so maybe some have done that with me, too.


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## vash (Aug 16, 2010)

I don't get any friend request lol.


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## heyJude (Aug 1, 2009)

I accept any and all friend requests on here. I don't mind. It's just a friend request. It would be nice if they messaged me once in a while though, lol. Most never correspond with me after the request is made, but this is a social anxiety site, so...*shrug*


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## meganmila (Jul 25, 2011)

I accept anyone.


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## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

I accept them all and then leave them a VM just saying whats up or whatever or try to talk about something we have in common. Its cool because i hardly request anyone unless I've talked to them a bit or we have a lot in common, so i start talking to someone i wouldn't have otherwise. I see your point though I thought it was little weird at first but its cool to me now, not that i get that many requests lol.


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## Losm (Jan 23, 2011)

Doesn't really happen to me but I'd accept everybody.


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## zerogrim (May 2, 2011)

i love adding and getting added but i don't know i don't always lie sending out random friend requests just because...uhhh...yeah...i don't know...i just don't like it sometimes...


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