# What if girls just aren't worth the time/effort/money?



## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

That's pretty much the conclusion that I'm coming to. In order to have any chance at success with girls, you must be outgoing and social. and that's _just_ to have the chance. As a guy, being outgoing and social only ensures that women will not spit in your face or call you a creep upon saying hi.

You still have to go through massive amounts of rejection, you're still expected to do all the initiation, you're still expected to take several hundred risks between hello and the actual relationship. Unless you happen to be really good looking, shy/quiet/unsocial/socially awkward guys have no hope. Maybe girls just aren't worth it.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

For ****s sake, this ridiculous generalisation that all girls are the same, that they all seek the same type of personality and that you MUST be a, b & c in order to have any chance of a relationship is really getting old. *slap*


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Of course they are worth it, every girl in this world is beautiful, loving, understanding, every girl should be pampered and cherished like a unicorn. We all should put our time and money in every woman on earth because they are so high up in the mountains and we are so low in the dirt. If a girl/woman should ever take interest in you, you should thank the gods from above for blessing you.


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

AussiePea said:


> For ****s sake, this ridiculous generalisation that all girls are the same, that they all seek the same type of personality and that you MUST be a, b & c in order to have any chance of a relationship is really getting old. *slap*


For real. My dad got tons of tail when he was younger and he was very quiet and reserved. He just learned how to make it work in his favor. Cause girls like different guys cause girls are, like, different people. Nah mean, OP?


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## SilentLyric (Aug 20, 2012)

I agree with OP, it seems like you have to do much to even get the girl's attention, then you have to build rapport, but there's a good chance she's just going to lose interest or start seeing another guy. I'll just play video games for the rest of the life, they are much easier than any girl is.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

AussiePea said:


> For ****s sake, this ridiculous generalisation that all girls are the same, that they all seek the same type of personality and that you MUST be a, b & c in order to have any chance of a relationship is really getting old. *slap*


Yup.

Read my signature, 9mm.
Also, have you considered meeting up with a girl from this site?


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## buklti (Jul 23, 2010)

I know from personal experience that relationships are expensive. All the dinners, movies, gas, gifts, trips, etc.


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

mezzoforte said:


> Yup.
> 
> Read my signature, 9mm.
> Also, have you considered meeting up with a girl from this site?


I didn't know that this was some kind of dating site. And yes, it's true that genders are made up of individuals and people are different, etc etc. But I think we can say that girls/women have an instinctive aversion to quiet, unsocial men. That's why it's common to find men who have literally never had contact with women, but considerably less common to find women who have no male contact.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

9mm said:


> I didn't know that this was some kind of dating site. And yes, it's true that genders are made up of individuals and people are different, etc etc. But I think we can say that girls/women have an instinctive aversion to quiet, unsocial men. That's why it's common to find men who have literally never had contact with women, but considerably less common to find women who have no male contact.


It was just a suggestion. It worked for me and some other users on this site because it's nice dating someone who can relate to your SA. :stu

I don't have an aversion to quiet, unsocial men and I know there are other girls like me, so you'll be fine.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Barette said:


> For real. My dad got tons of tail when he was younger and he was very quiet and reserved. He just learned how to make it work in his favor. Cause girls like different guys cause girls are, like, different people. Nah mean, OP?


Did you just say that girls like different sorts of guys, but that your father got plenty of those women's attention?

If all girls liked different stuff, a shy, friendless loner would get just as much women as a loud-mouthed, outgoing guy, but we all know this is just not true.


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

TPower said:


> If all girls liked different stuff, a shy, friendless loner would get just as much women as a loud-mouthed, outgoing guy, but we all know this is just not true.


Exactly


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

9mm said:


> Exactly


So because hoards of girls don't approach shy guys, that means girls are hardly ever interested in them? What we're trying to say is that all girls are not the same. Therefore, there is hope for you and other shy guys. If all girls were the same and only liked extroverted guys there would be no hope for you at all. Which is not the case. There are plenty of shy guys who do have girlfriends. And most of the time, it's not because they have social status. It's because they've found a girl who likes them for who they are. I don't think you should give up.

Btw shy, friendless female loners don't get as much attention as loud-mouthed, outgoing girls, mostly because those outgoing girls are more approachable. I would know. But there are some guys who like quiet girls, and some guys who don't. Everyone has their preferences.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

TPower said:


> Did you just say that girls like different sorts of guys, but that your father got plenty of those women's attention?
> 
> If all girls liked different stuff, a shy, friendless loner would get just as much women as a loud-mouthed, outgoing guy, but we all know this is just not true.


Because, *news flash*, shy guys don't approach woman or get themselves into situations where they can get to know these woman. It's not because their personalities are unattractive, it's the fact they don't expose themselves to begin with.


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## Nesquick (Mar 2, 2013)

Suck it up, no rationalising will help. If you are a straight male you are _biologically_ programmed to find women attractive. No matter if you are bound to have success with them or not you'll still think about them 100x a day, or look at women on the street etc.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

OP is being too general. This is not the case often.

If you can't talk to people in general then you are probably going to have a hard time meeting anyone, regardless of what sex they are. If just being able to talk to people is what you define as "social" then, yes, you will have a hard time meeting girls, but girls aren't really that impressed by social status unless you're famous or something.

If you want something then go after it. It sounds like from what you are saying, that because you are shy you will never approach women and thus it is useless to continue? That's not a good mindset but it's expected from someone in your position with SA


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

I suspect that a lot of SA guys have Asperger's Syndrome. Aspies tend to have difficulty relating with other people. SA females I'd imagine are far less likely to have Asperger's Syndrome because Asperger's Syndrome is a predominately male condition while SA actually affects more women than men.


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

bwidger85 said:


> OP is being too general. This is not the case often.
> 
> If you can't talk to people in general then you are probably going to have a hard time meeting anyone, regardless of what sex they are. If just being able to talk to people is what you define as "social" then, yes, you will have a hard time meeting girls, *but girls aren't really that impressed by social status unless you're famous or something.*
> 
> If you want something then go after it. It sounds like from what you are saying, that because you are shy you will never approach women and thus it is useless to continue? That's not a good mindset but it's expected from someone in your position with SA


Boy, I would have a MUCH easier time with girls if this were true


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

TPower said:


> Did you just say that girls like different sorts of guys, but that your father got plenty of those women's attention?
> 
> If all girls liked different stuff, a shy, friendless loner would get just as much women as a loud-mouthed, outgoing guy, but we all know this is just not true.


That's what I thought too, if all girls are so "different" then every man on earth would have women "flocking" to them.


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## bsd3355 (Nov 30, 2005)

9mm said:


> Boy, I would have a MUCH easier time with girls if this were true


It is true. I am a loner (by choice) for the most part and I can meet girls if I wanted to.

How many girls have you asked out in person? What are you doing to actually MEET a girl? If you aren't doing anything then why assume the worst?


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## AvBaSoT (Feb 10, 2013)

Hey OP, if you try No Fap for a month, I guarantee that you will have the confidence and swagger to approach girls. Your body will MAKE you after awhile. As another poster said earlier, you are designed by nature to go after girls. You just don't have the motivation because you are probably beating off every other day.

Maybe all the major religions that considered masturbation a sin were actually on to something!


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## juizdelinha (May 23, 2012)

Why would they require time and effort if you're paying them???


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## Nesquick (Mar 2, 2013)

AvBaSoT said:


> Maybe all the major religions that considered masturbation a sin were actually on to something!


IMO masturbation is not wrong at all to let off some steam.

The reason a few main global religions see masturbation as a sin is because they promote the "go forth and multiply" dogma and IMO in this day and ago, that's crazy. If I have anything against religion it's mainly this outdated notion which stems from 2000 years ago before this planet suffered human over-population

Anyway sorry for this side-step, back on topic


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

AvBaSoT said:


> Hey OP, if you try No Fap for a month, I guarantee that you will have the confidence and swagger to approach girls. Your body will MAKE you after awhile. As another poster said earlier, you are designed by nature to go after girls. You just don't have the motivation because you are probably beating off every other day.
> 
> Maybe all the major religions that considered masturbation a sin were actually on to something!


I've tried, never made it past a week however.


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Barette said:


> For real. My dad got tons of tail when he was younger and he was very quiet and reserved. He just learned how to make it work in his favor. Cause girls like different guys cause girls are, like, different people. Nah mean, OP?


He must have had high social status, so high that even St. Peter is looking up wondering how he can reach his social status.


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## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

Maybe most, but not all.


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## huh (Mar 19, 2007)

I think it's quite amusing how PC some guys on here strive to be. Anyway, an outgoing, extroverted, more confident guy is going to do better with women on average than your typical introverted loner type with SA tendencies. We face an uphill battle when it comes to dating. It might not be worth the effort, but I've found it hard to ignore my urge to keep trying anyway. Overall it just makes me more depressed and frustrated.


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

You've made like ten threads about this already. I think you already know the answer: stay far, far away from the female creatures.


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

AllToAll said:


> You've made like ten threads about this already. I think you already know the answer: stay far, far away from the female creatures.


good advice


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

God, if only I had a definite answer to this, so I'd know whether to even bother or just to be content being always single for the rest of my life. :yes


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## AllToAll (Jul 6, 2011)

9mm said:


> good advice


Just looking out for ya, buddy.


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## AvBaSoT (Feb 10, 2013)

Well yeah....there's your problem. You need that biological sexual energy that nature provided you with. Do you think the male alpha lions sit around wacking off everyday? No, they do what nature tells them to do and go after female lionesses.

You also need to develop willpower and determination if you're going to go after girls. Use no fap as a test of your willpower. Results will come if you can do it for a few weeks.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

AussiePea said:


> Because, *news flash*, shy guys don't approach woman or get themselves into situations where they can get to know these woman. It's not because their personalities are unattractive, it's the fact they don't expose themselves to begin with.


Oh you.

I wish I could right now, regroup stories of guys on this forum who actually approached women and were either looked at as if they were subhuman creatures or called creepy.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Nah, I'm worth it.


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## Sacrieur (Jan 14, 2013)

diamondheart89 said:


> Nah, I'm worth it.


New thread idea: girls: how many nice coins before you put out?


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Sacrieur said:


> New thread idea: girls: how many nice coins before you put out?


9000


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

AussiePea said:


> Because, *news flash*, shy guys don't approach woman or get themselves into situations where they can get to know these woman. It's not because their personalities are unattractive, it's the fact they don't expose themselves to begin with.


Exactly. But this'll go over his head.


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

diamondheart89 said:


> 9000


Its over 9000!


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

rdrr said:


> Its over 9000!


:lol

9001*


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

TPower said:


> Oh you.
> 
> I wish I could right now, regroup stories of guys on this forum who actually approached women and were either looked at as if they were subhuman creatures or called creepy.


I fail to see what that has to do with being shy. The methods in which they approach are not directly related to their shy personality.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

AussiePea said:


> I fail to see what that has to do with being shy. The methods in which they approach are not directly related to their shy personality.


Unpopular/shy men are seen as creeps/weirdos, period. Unless they are outrageously attractive.


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

diamondheart89 said:


> Nah, I'm worth it.


Okie dokie "princess". :b


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Rahul87 said:


> Okie dokie "princess". :b


Queen

no scratch that

Empress. 8)


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

cypher said:


> Being shy in itself doesn't make you seem like a creep. Outgoing, social guys can also act like a creep. What makes you look like a creep is if you act like a creep. If you have SA, you're demeanor and nervousness may make the other person uncomfortable and turn them off. But that's SA, which is different than being merely shy/introverted.


Result's the same. Women will be turned off by you.

So it's incredibly naive (not to say stupid) to think that no matter what character or physical flaw a man has, he attracts the same amount of women as every other man out there.

Some traits will turn off most women
Some traits will turn on most women


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

I love how people justify that all women like exactly the same thing because they've had no luck, when really there are people of all personality types etc out there having success with women for various reasons. Are all men the same? No... So why the **** would you think all women were the same?


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Tanya1 said:


> I love how people justify that all women like exactly the same thing because they've had no luck, when really there are people of all personality types etc out there having success with women for various reasons. Are all men the same? No... So why the **** would you think all women were the same?


They just say that judgmental, ignorant stuff out of bitterness/frustration. I think these people will be relieved once they start dating and their girlfriend is able to prove them wrong.


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## Daveyboy (Jan 13, 2013)

Tanya1 said:


> I don't take coins, I require all my suitors go on a quest to the furthest reaches of the Arctic


I'll be back....


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Tanya1 said:


> I love how people justify that all women like exactly the same thing because they've had no luck, when really there are people of all personality types etc out there having success with women for various reasons. Are all men the same? No... So why the **** would you think all women were the same?


Okay, I'll give you an example.

The more lottery tickets I buy, the more I increase my odds of winning. I'm playing the numbers. Obviously, it doesn't mean I'll win -- as a matter of fact, maybe I won't get a red cent out of it once it's all said and done. *But I'm increasing the odds*.

It's pretty much the same thing here. A certain type of personality will increase my success with women while another will be a nuisance. 
The first will not necessarily please and charm all women, but they will charm a greater percentage of women than the second.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

TPower said:


> Okay, I'll give you an example.
> 
> The more lottery tickets I buy, the more I increase my odds of winning. I'm playing the numbers. Obviously, it doesn't mean I'll win -- as a matter of fact, maybe I won't get a red cent out of it once it's all said and done. *But I'm increasing the odds*.
> 
> ...


It doesn't matter, if you don't have Dragon scales most women won't like you, I thought everyone knew that? >.> I guess some will go for Mammoth Tusks though, but only if you have photographic evidence of taking down some Giants and several acolytes of an evil cult as well. They'll generally want the amulet's the cult people wear to prove that too though, and if they don't wear amulet's your basically screwed man, sorry. :/ what can I say?


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Daveyboy said:


> I'll be back....


Be careful, Dragons are awfully cranky after being woken up.


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## niacin (May 26, 2012)

Are you saying that girls are only good for one thing? It's International Women's Day. Show some respect 

Also, what kinds of girls are you approaching? Do you approach women who are equally attractive/unattractive, skinny/overweight, shy, unpopular, and economically equal to yourself? Sometimes I hear guys rant about hot women not liking them because they aren't rich or model-like. Are you approaching these women mainly based off of their looks instead of their personalities? If so, that's equally shallow and you deserve what you get. I'm not saying you're like that, but it sounds as though you view women as things you put money into in exchange for companionship/sex. Relationships aren't about that. There's no reason to "give up". Maybe you are just looking for the wrong thing.


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

We can say there is a statistical trend of women preferring social, high-status males over quiet, unsocial low-status ones, and that wouldn't at all negate the possibility that "not all women are attrcted to the same thing" However, it may well be that, ceteris paribus, it is very much more difficult for said low-status and quiet male to attract a mate than a high-status and social one


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## niacin (May 26, 2012)

9mm said:


> We can say there is a statistical trend of women preferring social, high-status males over quiet, unsocial low-status ones, and that wouldn't at all negate the possibility that "not all women are attrcted to the same thing" However, it may well be that, ceteris paribus, it is very much more difficult for said low-status and quiet male to attract a mate than a high-status and social one


Where are the statistics? What kind of women are you approaching? If you're reaching out of your league (I hate that term, but same for girls too) and writing off shy/less attractive women, then what do you expect? I don't say this to insult your looks or anything. I have no clue what you look like, but why not get to know a fellow shy girl? Girls aren't put off by shyness. Girls are put off by rudeness and extremely strange behavior/gross habits. Sometimes SA can make people seem that way when they are not. But I don't think shyness is why people reject men. Unless they are jerks.


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## Isabelle50 (Nov 19, 2012)

Sacrieur said:


> New thread idea: girls: how many nice coins before you put out?


Coins?! How cheap do you think I am?

I only take visa.


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

mezzoforte said:


> They just say that judgmental, ignorant stuff out of bitterness/frustration. I think these people will be relieved once they start dating and their girlfriend is able to prove them wrong.


You mean, "IF" some of us ever start dating. A big emphasis on IF. 
Its not rocket science to see that we already have many more single, lonely frustrated guys than girls on the planet and its only going to get worse as time goes by. Such men will just have to deal with it or kill ourselves or whatever. :/


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Rahul87 said:


> You mean, "IF" some of us ever start dating. A big emphasis on IF.
> Its not rocket science to see that we already have many more single, lonely frustrated guys than girls on the planet and its only going to get worse as time goes by. Such men will just have to deal with it or kill ourselves or whatever. :/


I think you will be able to find a cute, nerdy girl. Don't give up!


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Rahul87 said:


> You mean, "IF" some of us ever start dating. A big emphasis on IF.
> Its not rocket science to see that we already have many more single, lonely frustrated guys than girls on the planet and its only going to get worse as time goes by. Such men will just have to deal with it or kill ourselves or whatever. :/


I don't see why it's going to get worse as time goes by, providing you don't live in a country like China where they often have abortions because they have a one child limit and want sons... The ratio is usually more balanced in most countries.

Still, you've got to keep trying regardless (as long as you want a partner that is .)


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

Tanya1 said:


> I don't see why it's going to get worse as time goes by, providing you don't live in a country like China where they often have abortions because they have a one child limit and want sons... The ratio is usually more balanced in most countries.
> 
> Still, you've got to keep trying regardless (as long as you want a partner that is .)


Yeah, I guess I was pointing out to places like China and India, with their overly skewed gender balance towards men. So there, its definitely a survival of the best men getting the women. Someone like a poor villager doesn't stand a chance over there.  Thousands, if not millions of Indians and Chinese will just not be able to find a woman, plain and simple, now, and in the coming years. Their preference for men is biting them in the ***, HARD.

But if I end up forever alone, at least I'll have plenty of company, even if they are thousands of miles away. 

For instance if I wanted to do an arranged marriage with a girl from my home country of India (which I don't prefer to), I'd actually feel bad at "stealing" her away from a potential suitor in her home country, especially with fewer eligible women than men to pair up. She'd be drawn to me for my U.S and Canadian passports, whereas that guy wouldn't stand a chance and I feel guilty for that.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

The thing I find funny is that we have all these threads about girls preferring particular traits in guys and how it's completely outrageous and so forth, but no one seems to ask about what guys prefer in woman. I think you will find guys are more superficial than woman are in this regard.


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

AussiePea said:


> The thing I find funny is that we have all these threads about girls preferring particular traits in guys and how it's completely outrageous and so forth, but no one seems to ask about what guys prefer in woman. I think you will find guys are more superficial than woman are in this regard.


Men are just as superficial as women, but for different reasons.


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## AussiePea (Mar 27, 2007)

9mm said:


> Men are just as superficial as women, but for different reasons.


So then why all the complaining if it's completely hypocritical to do so?


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## Forwhatiamworth (Mar 3, 2013)

cypher said:


> Being shy in itself doesn't make you seem like a creep. Outgoing, social guys can also act like a creep. What makes you look like a creep is if you act like a creep. If you have SA, you're demeanor and nervousness may make the other person uncomfortable and turn them off. But that's SA, which is different than being merely shy/introverted.


This is very true, I am shy myself and talk to a lot of shy people as well.It is all about your demeanor, the quiet guys who look very angry and "creepy" will probably keep people at a distance. And to certain extent, no ones knows whats going in there personal life that could be showing in there body language and interactions with people. There are quiet people who are very approachable who just prefer not to talk much. But what I will say that women who are shy have just as a hard meeting men as guys who are quiet too. But then again, I live in California, so there is typical persona people embody here and if you don't fit it you pretty much go unnoticed.


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## withteeth (Mar 2, 2013)

Girls aren't worth any effort.... women on the other hand.


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## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

I was thinking the same thing as you OP, but then I decided to keep trying just for spite. I plan on continuing to pursue women for the rest of my life and keep track of how it goes. That way, if I find someone - great! - otherwise I'll be able to write a book about being the 65 year old man who couldn't get a date - money!

Also, as a side note: girls on this site, and shy girls/girls with SA in general are not much different than the type you're talking about. They're still far more likely to date men who are outgoing, because that's simply the nature of being outgoing. I can think of a bunch of girls on this site who claim to love shy guys but they're with guys who are very social; take their advice with a grain of salt.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Rainbat said:


> I was thinking the same thing as you OP, but then I decided to keep trying just for spite. I plan on continuing to pursue women for the rest of my life and keep track of how it goes. That way, if I find someone - great! - otherwise I'll be able to write a book about being the 65 year old man who couldn't get a date - money!
> 
> Also, as a side note: girls on this site, and shy girls/girls with SA in general are not much different than the type you're talking about. They're still far more likely to date men who are outgoing, because that's simply the nature of being outgoing. I can think of a bunch of girls on this site who claim to love shy guys but they're with guys who are very social; take their advice with a grain of salt.


says the guy who claims to have never had a girlfriend and is not female himself. I don't want a list of names of the female users you're talking about because it's personal, but at the same time unless you point out who you're talking about your point has no credibility what so ever because I can't think of a single occasion where a female user has said they are dating an outgoing guy.


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## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

Tanya1 said:


> says the guy who claims to have never had a girlfriend and is not female himself. I don't want a list of names of the female users you're talking about because it's personal, but at the same time unless you point out who you're talking about your point has no credibility what so ever because I can't think of a single occasion where a female user has said they are dating an outgoing guy.


I never claimed that I've never had a girlfriend. I just don't have one at the moment.

And no, I'm not going to list their names, but I don't really have to. Everyone goes for more outgoing people, because they're more approachable and they make their desires known. Take any gal on this site and put her in a social situation like a classroom or a party or something. There are 2 guys in the room that both like here equally, one is shy the other is outgoing. The outgoing guy walks up to her and makes conversation, she laughs and giggles, they get along, he asks her out, boom they start dating. The shy guy doesn't get the date because he's _shy_, and never approached her or if he did, wasn't talkative enough to grab her attention more-so than the gregarious guy.

What I mean is: It doesn't make sense to say that you "prefer shy guys" because you really don't. You want someone who will enjoy talking to you and make it apparent that they like you, and shy people rarely do this. You're far, far more likely to date the guys that actually walk up to you and start flirting.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Rainbat said:


> I never claimed that I've never had a girlfriend. I just don't have one at the moment.
> 
> And no, I'm not going to list their names, but I don't really have to. Everyone goes for more outgoing people, because they're more approachable and they make their desires known. Take any gal on this site and put her in a social situation like a classroom or a party or something. There are 2 guys in the room that both like here equally, one is shy the other is outgoing. The outgoing guy walks up to her and makes conversation, she laughs and giggles, they get along, he asks her out, boom they start dating. The shy guy doesn't get the date because he's _shy_, and never approached her or if he did, wasn't talkative enough to grab her attention more-so than the gregarious guy.
> 
> What I mean is: It doesn't make sense to say that you "prefer shy guys" because you really don't. You want someone who will enjoy talking to you and make it apparent that they like you, and shy people rarely do this. You're far, far more likely to date the guys that actually walk up to you and start flirting.


I prefer to date shy guys, and always have because I like dating someone who is like me in that way. Guys who have SA are more appealing to me because I can relate to them and even if they're shy/awkward in social situations, it doesn't mean that they can't warm up to me and be talkative with me.The guys I've dated always started online though. I think it'd definitely be harder for me to end up dating a shy guy that I saw in rl. But I'm definitely more into shy guys, which is why I resort to online dating. If an outgoing guy started flirting with me in person, I would kind of shy away from him because I'd feel like it'd be difficult dating an extrovert in the long run.


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## Bohuw (Feb 1, 2013)

*Yawn* 
Let the OP have his whinge and everyone just carry on with your life. It's not like he's starting some kind of revolution, just either looking for an argument or hoping to find like minded people.


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## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

mezzoforte said:


> I prefer to date shy guys, and always have because I like dating someone who is like me in that way. Guys who have SA are more appealing to me because I can relate to them and even if they're shy/awkward in social situations, it doesn't mean that they can't warm up to me and be talkative with me.The guys I've dated always started online though. I think it'd definitely be harder for me to end up dating a shy guy that I saw in rl. But I'm definitely more into shy guys, which is why I resort to online dating. If an outgoing guy started flirting with me in person, I would kind of shy away from him because I'd feel like it'd be difficult dating an extrovert in the long run.


But in a way, these guys online acted outgoing, and that's one of the reasons why you kept talking to them and ultimately ended up dating them. What if the person you messaged online never replied, because they were too shy? Say you messaged a guy on this site that you liked because of his posts or pictures or whatever, and all he replied with was "ok thanks" because he's reserved and is nervous about chatting with you. You'd probably move on to someone who was more friendly right? Well there ya go, it's the same thing.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Rainbat said:


> But in a way, these guys online acted outgoing, and that's one of the reasons why you kept talking to them and ultimately ended up dating them. What if the person you messaged online never replied, because they were too shy? *Say you messaged a guy on this site that you liked because of his posts or pictures or whatever, and all he replied with was "ok thanks" because he's reserved and doesn't want to chat with you. *I think you'd probably move on, right?


Stuff like that _did_ happen. They were shy online and didn't talk much, but eventually warmed up to me after I kept pursuing them lol. It actually took A LOT of time and effort with one guy. But I found his shyness cute. The only reason I initiated contact in the first place was because I saw that they had similar interests.


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## Rainbat (Jan 5, 2012)

mezzoforte said:


> Stuff like that _did_ happen.


Shyness and disinterest are pretty indistinguishable online so I'm surprised that you didn't interpret this guy's "ok thanks" replies as him simply not wanting to talk to you. I'm guessing there were some smiley faces and some subtle flirting exchanged, because if he were truly reserved about it I think you'd probably feel discouraged or perhaps even rejected.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Rainbat said:


> Shyness and disinterest are pretty indistinguishable online so I'm surprised that you didn't interpret this guy's "ok thanks" replies as him simply not wanting to talk to you. I'm guessing there were some smiley faces and some subtle flirting exchanged, because if he were truly reserved about it I think you'd probably feel discouraged or perhaps even rejected.


I felt confident that I would be able to seduce him, so I kept trying lmao. And it worked. :boogie


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## Isabelle50 (Nov 19, 2012)

> It doesn't make sense to say that you "prefer shy guys" because you really don't.












C'mon man. You can't speak for every woman in the world. In fact, you can't _really_ speak for any woman. And you definitely can't claim to know my preferences better than I know myself. Personally I would rather date an outgoing guy. But many women would prefer someone who is shy because they don't like interacting with a lot of people and the pressure of being around someone who is always talking or always socializing is overwhelming.


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## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

9mm said:


> Boy, I would have a MUCH easier time with girls if this were true


Here's a question: can you start and hold a conversation with a girl? If not, _that's_ your problem. People can talk that status jazz all they want, but if you can do that, success with women is something you won't have.


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

If you don't think girls are worth the time/effort/money, then don't bother with them. It's honestly that simple. You're not doing any potential girlfriends any favors by being with them if you secretly resent them. Some people have recommended that you stop masterbating to increase your drive to pursue women. I say masterbate MORE to sexually satisfy yourself without investing time/effort/money in a woman.


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## Sacrieur (Jan 14, 2013)

OP objectifies women.

Sacrieur points out said ludicrous position with satire.

People get offended at Sacrieur.

---

I don't even know if I want to live on this planet anymore. Women are not objects, and this thread is a complete joke. It's freakin' hilarious, actually.
_*"... [G]irls are not machines that you put Kindness Coins into until sex falls out*__*."*_​_source_

There are some very quixotic notions of a relationship here that are quite frankly intensely disturbing.


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## stookified (Sep 15, 2012)

Of course they are worth the time and effort. I mean its the greatest power in the world and I don't mean to objectify but what do men think about all the time...its just about finding someone worth your time and effort, its like applying for a job imo. You get excited an interview and some might go well some might not but if you don't keep trying to get one you are not gonna make it in life.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Sacrieur said:


> OP objectifies women.
> 
> Sacrieur points out said ludicrous position with satire.
> 
> ...


what? who got offended? I think everyone who responded to you responded using obviously sarcastic humour as well.


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## Sacrieur (Jan 14, 2013)

Tanya1 said:


> what? who got offended? I think everyone who responded to you responded using obviously sarcastic humour as well.


> Reasons why I'm upset about it. I don't know who, and I don't care.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Sacrieur said:


> > Reasons why I'm upset about it. I don't know who, and I don't care.


I'm confused, you don't know that anyone was offended, but you said that people were offended :S Okkk then...


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

AussiePea said:


> So then why all the complaining if it's completely hypocritical to do so?


The difference is that male shallowness is well known and is talked about openly. It's common to hear men confessing to their shallow nature and expressing sympathy for the women whom it adversely affects. What frustrates me most is how we're continuously bombarded with the notion that women are less shallow, that they're more complex and less driven by primitive urges than men are; that men are lazy, incompetent, and unfaithful. There is so much denial about what really attracts women. And unlike the ugly woman, no one really sympathizes with her male counterpart; the low status male. His suffering goes unrecognized because it's taboo to criticize female behavior.


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## Mersault (Dec 18, 2012)

Well, women do not really have it that good either, they age faster and society is a lot more critical of female ageing than male one. As De Maupassant once put it: women appear to have only their looks as their fortune, and those will be gone sooner rather than later.

Human relations are hard. At least do not try to alter yourself in the hope that this will get you somewhere; what is the use of changing your own true self if only such destruction can bring forward a mate? By now i am resolved to be who i am, no matter what happens. At least in this way i will have saved something- myself.


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## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

9mm said:


> The difference is that male shallowness is well known and is talked about openly. It's common to hear men confessing to their shallow nature and expressing sympathy for the women whom it adversely affects. What frustrates me most is how we're continuously bombarded with the notion that women are less shallow, that they're more complex and less driven by primitive urges than men are; that men are lazy, incompetent, and unfaithful. There is so much denial about what really attracts women. And unlike the ugly woman, no one really sympathizes with her male counterpart; the low status male. His suffering goes unrecognized because it's taboo to criticize female behavior.


If women weren't "worth it", you wouldn't be so up in arms about them not choosing you, now would you? And don't even get me started on that "low status male" BS. If you have the self-confidence, you will get a girl eventually. You can't just sit back and wait for it to happen because most women don't approach guys, and even if they did, if you don't have the confidence and social skills to talk back to her, conversation over. That's why most guys with severe SA don't get girls. Enough with the status bull****


Mersault said:


> *Well, women do not really have it that good either, they age faster and society is a lot more critical of female ageing than male one. *As De Maupassant once put it: women appear to have only their looks as their fortune, and those will be gone sooner rather than later.


This too. After women turn 50, she can't get movie roles and guys find her less sexually desirable. There are double standards for both sexes.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

SA males get friendzoned more than any other group of males on earth.


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

What was the quote I heard this week... "If I don't have to work on my friendships, why would I need to work on my relationship?"

I would have a no material gift policy and a no drama policy.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

A lot of people decide it's not worth the time and effort and take themselves out of the dating market. Not sure whether men or women are more likely to do that. I've pretty much taken myself off the market for the past 3 years. Only gone on a handful of dates. School has taken over my life and going on online dates just sucks the life out of me. The preparation necessary is too much effort for too little results. I rarely ever get a message from a guy that I feel really excited to meet. Most often I just have a "meh" feeling. 

So for a date I have to not eat much and nothing with garlic/curry/onions that day, so as to not look bloated of smell funny. Have to straighten the hair. Do the makeup perfectly. Find an outfit that hides the flab appropriately. Get super nervous. Deal with 80 zillion annoying text messages to figure out where and when to meet cause of course guys don't call. And if I'm able to get them to go to a bar with me (so I can drink to calm my nerves), I risk getting a hangover. So not only will I not be able to study that night due to being tipsy, I won't be able to study the next day cause of the hangover.


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## TobeyJuarez (May 16, 2012)

komorikun said:


> A lot of people decide it's not worth the time and effort and take themselves out of the dating market. Not sure whether men or women are more likely to do that. I've pretty much taken myself off the market for the past 3 years. Only gone on a handful of dates. School has taken over my life and going on online dates just sucks the life out of me. The preparation necessary is too much effort for too little results. I rarely ever get a message from a guy that I feel really excited to meet. Most often I just have a "meh" feeling.
> 
> So for a date I have to not eat much and nothing with garlic/curry/onions that day, so as to not look bloated of smell funny. Have to straighten the hair. Do the makeup perfectly. Find an outfit that hides the flab appropriately. Get super nervous. Deal with 80 zillion annoying text messages to figure out where and when to meet cause of course guys don't call. And if I'm able to get them to go to a bar with me (so I can drink to calm my nerves), I risk getting a hangover. So not only will I not be able to study that night due to being tipsy, I won't be able to study the next day cause of the hangover.


:blank damn komorikun.... why not just go to have fun?


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

illmatic1 said:


> :blank damn komorikun.... why not just go to have fun?


I don't have fun with strangers. It takes me a while to get used to someone and not get nervous. In order to have any fun with a new person, I have to be a bit drunk.


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## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

TPower said:


> SA males get friendzoned more than any other group of males on earth.


Oh that "friendzone". _SO awful _to just be friends with a female_! _I'd rather be eaten by lions!:afr


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

Dreday said:


> If women weren't "worth it", you wouldn't be so up in arms about them not choosing you, now would you?


I'm not really "up in arms" about women not choosing me, I just don't care anymore.



> And don't even get me started on that "low status male" BS. If you have the self-confidence, you will get a girl eventually.


This is simply not true at all. Not even remotely close to being even slightly the tiniest bit true. I'm a confident person, and it hasn't helped me very much. People assume that when a man becomes confident, he starts swaggering about, engaging in banter, and flirting with girls. They assume that the difference between the typical cocky, swaggering 'jock' and me is that I lack confidence and he doesn't; and that all my problems would be resolved if only I could attain a greater feeling of self-worth. Actually, I find the behavior of most men quite apish and crude, and despite being just as confident as the average male, I cannot bring myself to behave like them.

I find the contention that I "lack self-confidence" to be patronizing.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Social confidence is a product of social status.

People here mostly have anxiety problems because they were treated badly. Nature decided that shy/low-key people were less worthy of respect. You can't just tell a person to "be confident". Not in social situations anyway. 

Any cocky outgoing prick out there, I can guarantee you that their personality would be completely different if from childhood on, they were bullied/teased/mocked by their peers. Having their peers' approval and respect gave them the ability to be socially confident.

Social confidence is not a choice. It is or not given to you by others.


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

Idk what the point of this thread is anymore. Haven't you decided that girls aren't worth it, 9mm?


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## Isabelle50 (Nov 19, 2012)

Sacrieur said:


> > Reasons why I'm upset about it. I don't know who, and I don't care.


I don't think anyone was offended.... I was just joking about the visa thing. Obviously I take payment in jewelry and gold as well.

There is time and effort involved in any relationship so if OP doesn't think dating someone is worth the effort then.... don't? If it doesn't matter much to him then, just don't date anyone. Simple fix.


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## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

9mm said:


> This is simply not true at all. Not even remotely close to being even slightly the tiniest bit true. I'm a confident person, and it hasn't helped me very much. People assume that when a man becomes confident, he starts swaggering about, engaging in banter, and flirting with girls. I find the behavior of most men quite apish and crude, and despite being just as confident as the average male, I cannot bring myself to behave like them.
> 
> I find the contention that I "lack self-confidence" to be patronizing.


You may be confident in other aspects, but how are you in showtime? I know that's what I lack, but I can only speak personally.

But of course it's not the only thing. That's why I asked you could you hold a conversation with a girl an be loose around them. You could have it all, but if you can't do that, Game Over. Trust me on that one.

And yes the behavior of some guys is appalling, but it's the only thing that works, at least with "outgoing" girls anyway.


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## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

TPower said:


> Social confidence is a product of social status.
> 
> People here mostly have anxiety problems because they were treated badly. Nature decided that shy/low-key people were less worthy of respect. You can't just tell a person to "be confident". Not in social situations anyway.
> 
> ...


That's called being around a bad crowd. If I had went to a better Jr Hs or had better classmates, I probably wouldn't even have SA.

The so-called "cool kids" can be a trip, especially the insecure ones. That's what wrecks confidence, it's no given to you as much as it's taken away by people like that.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Mersault said:


> Well, women do not really have it that good either, they age faster and society is a lot more critical of female ageing than male one. As De Maupassant once put it: women appear to have only their looks as their fortune, and those will be gone sooner rather than later.
> 
> Human relations are hard. At least do not try to alter yourself in the hope that this will get you somewhere; what is the use of changing your own true self if only such destruction can bring forward a mate? By now i am resolved to be who i am, no matter what happens. At least in this way i will have saved something- myself.


I agree, except for the part about women aging faster, I think that's pretty balanced from what I've personally seen. Though it always depends on the individuals genetics as well.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

TPower said:


> Social confidence is a product of social status.
> 
> People here mostly have anxiety problems because they were treated badly. Nature decided that shy/low-key people were less worthy of respect. You can't just tell a person to "be confident". Not in social situations anyway.
> 
> ...


Keep telling yourself that to make you feel better about your own shortcomings. There's plenty of shy people out there who overcome their obstacles in life, but you keep believing you're stuck where you are.


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

I felt kind of hesitant posting this because it's kind of a hard pill to swallow. But I think it's true and I want to share my opinion:

I wouldn't date you. And it's not because you're a "low status male." It's because you hate women. Don't get me wrong. I'm sure you love *** and titties and vaginas. But you hate women. You think we're all shallow and we'll only pay attention to the most high status men in hopes of gaining popularily and finanial resources from the relationship. And you hate that nobody is calling us out on it. People don't want to be in a relationship like that. People want to be with somebody who likes/respects them, and is fun to be around, and has a positive attitude. And it's not just women. It's men too. And I think it's perfectly reasonable to want that.

Let's say there's a woman that constantly says things like: _"All men are pigs. All they care about is having sex with attractive women so they can brag about it to their buddies. If my nose wasn't so big, I'd be swarmed with men." _

Would you want to date a woman like that? Because that's you. You're the male equivalent of that brand of women. _THAT_'s why you've been unsuccessful with women. Not because you're a "low status male."


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

*sigh* No I do not "hate women." The way I feel about women is a result of the way I've been treated by them my whole life, and has come about relatively recently. Up until just about a year ago I subscribed to the popular view that women are less shallow, more emotionally astute, and somehow superior to men in many ways. Back then I treated women with the respect I thought they deserved. I witness women acting rudely toward low status men all the time; it's not just me.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

9mm said:


> *sigh* No I do not "hate women." The way I feel about women is a result of the way I've been treated by them my whole life, and has come about relatively recently. Up until just about a year ago I subscribed to the popular view that women are less shallow, more emotionally astute, and somehow superior to men in many ways. Back then I treated women with the respect I thought they deserved. I witness women acting rudely toward low status men all the time; it's not just me.


So to sum up yes you do *hate * women (at least to some extent). You didn't always hate women, but a few women treated you badly your whole life and now you assume all women are shallow because of that. I see people of both gender's being dicks to the opposite gender all the time, for a variety of reasons. But obviously not all people are like that and obviously not all women are like that. But you've had a raw deal, and become bitter and hateful because of it, don't pretend you haven't.

No women are not superior to men, men and women are equal. Other people deserve to be treated with respect unless they are being a complete dick to you.


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

Girls AND boys are not worth the time/effort/money. They are NOT required to live. A relationship is not essential to living a full life. But this is far easier said than preached. Its society which has drilled this into our heads countless number of times. 

I wish I knew the answer in which do we REALLY need someone else to be fully happy? For those who absolutely cannot get a partner (or won't), are they never going to be as happy, fulfilled, live as long, etc. as those who do get partners?

There are some who just will not be able to find a partner, no matter what. We don't even have enough men to pair up with all the women on this planet, barring rejection due to personal preferences such as looks, career, hobbies, income, ethnicity/nationality, etc. They should not be subject to a worse life than those who do get a partner, should they? There are plenty of those in relationships who are far more miserable than if they were not.

I suppose for me, its just something I want to at least experience, which I haven't yet so far. I think I could die happy just to go out with a girl for a while, like date for a year before she breaks up with me. At least then I experienced what it felt like, all the good and all the bad. But so far, I have had zero experience with the opposite sex, period.


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## TPower (Feb 3, 2011)

Tanya1 said:


> Keep telling yourself that to make you feel better about your own shortcomings. There's plenty of shy people out there who overcome their obstacles in life, but you keep believing you're stuck where you are.


Those shy people are still shy, aren't they?
They didn't change what social circumstances created over the years.

They are still not 100% comfortable around people.


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## 9mm (Feb 12, 2013)

Tanya1 said:


> So to sum up yes you do *hate * women (at least to some extent). You didn't always hate women, but a few women treated you badly your whole life and now you assume all women are shallow because of that. I see people of both gender's being dicks to the opposite gender all the time, for a variety of reasons. But obviously not all people are like that and obviously not all women are like that. But you've had a raw deal, and become bitter and hateful because of it, don't pretend you haven't.


Don't love women, don't hate them. Just don't care about them. I feel nothing at all towards them.



> No women are not superior to men, men and women are equal. Other people deserve to be treated with respect unless they are being a complete dick to you.


Of course.


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## pete24 (Oct 13, 2010)

I cant see that any girl I have met has ever been worth it.

Lets say you go as far as getting on a date:

Doing things they want to do
Spending money on rubbish

Then if the date goes well the next stages:

Being as nice as you can, putting yourself out
spending more cash
Being put in "normal" but difficult situations due to SA (meeting her friends, parents, going to formal meals)


Then even if you get through that, the chances are if its your 1st relationship, it probably wont work (rare these days for someone first relationship to be their only relationship). Often it takes several tries to find a relationship that properly works.... Meaning thats several times of feeling devestated, and in my opinion the feeling of a breakup outweighs the good feeling of being in a relationship


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

Dreday said:


> Here's a question: can you start and hold a conversation with a girl? If not, _that's_ your problem. People can talk that status jazz all they want, but if you can do that, success with women is something you won't have.


I think the more appropriate question is whether 9mm actually gives a **** to have a genuine conversation with a girl or if he just wants to get his cock dirty.


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## pbanco (Jan 13, 2013)

9mm said:


> That's pretty much the conclusion that I'm coming to. In order to have any chance at success with girls, you must be outgoing and social. and that's _just_ to have the chance. As a guy, being outgoing and social only ensures that women will not spit in your face or call you a creep upon saying hi.
> 
> You still have to go through massive amounts of rejection, you're still expected to do all the initiation, you're still expected to take several hundred risks between hello and the actual relationship. Unless you happen to be really good looking, shy/quiet/unsocial/socially awkward guys have no hope. Maybe girls just aren't worth it.


I'm not seeing the point of this thread. If you say girls just aren't worth the 
time/effort/money then don't pursue them. Do you want to be convinced otherwise? 
What I think obviously is that you do want girls, but you are frustrated. Simple conclusion, forget the rest of this discussion. If you want success with women you will have to work through your frustrations. It's up to you.


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## Mersault (Dec 18, 2012)

No one is really worth any effort. What is worse is that often people hate the effort they think they have to make, and end up taking that hatred out on the other people who supposedly accepted them only after the copious effort.
Personally i am through with this mentality. I make an effort for myself. Frankly if i do not get a girl then that is tough, but i won't hate myself for it or anything else. 
Sadly life is not a contest of who is better at anything. Often it matters who gets where first.


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## MobiusX (Nov 14, 2008)

why is the guy is expected to pay and do stuff like open doors? I never understood that.


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## phoenixwright (Jun 22, 2011)

pbanco said:


> I'm not seeing the point of this thread. If you say girls just aren't worth the
> time/effort/money then don't pursue them. Do you want to be convinced otherwise?
> What I think obviously is that you do want girls, but you are frustrated. Simple conclusion, forget the rest of this discussion. If you want success with women you will have to work through your frustrations. It's up to you.


A female acquaintance of mine thinks the phrase "success with women" is very dehumanizing and sexist. It's the wrong mindset to take. See this is the problem with us guys. We see it like a game. _Success_ with women. _Scoring_ with women. Winning the game. Women don't phrase things like this when they talk about men. Men need to see this as a process of relating rather than winning. This is where lots of guys fail, including SA guys. If you don't get anywhere with a girl, that doesn't mean you are a failure. You might not just be able to relate with each other SA or no SA. Why is it that every time you run into someone incompatible, men have to perceive it as a failure on their part? It takes two to tango.

I have seen low-status beta as **** mother****as get cute girls. They relate to each other and have things in common. I'm somewhere in between a liberal and a libertarian. I butt heads with liberals because they want to regulate things that I don't want regulated. And I butt heads with libertarians because they don't believe in social safety nets. I think everyone who is willing to work should be able to have a somewhat decent standard of living (in the more socialist countries, like the ones in the European Union, the poverty line is considered 60% of the median income. Whereas in the United States and to a lesser extent Canada, they have a more strict definition of what is considered poverty). And people who are unable to work due to disability is entitled to that as well. How can I relate with a liberal hipster intellectual if I think she is a fascist? (and a conservative would just be impossible. Absolutely no way) How can I share the rest of my life with a libertarian if she thinks I'm a fascist? lol.


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## SnowFlakesFire (Aug 23, 2012)

Always when you have a goal, your effort is not worth it. Blame yourself in the end.


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## pbanco (Jan 13, 2013)

phoenixwright said:


> A female acquaintance of mine thinks the phrase "success with women" is very dehumanizing and sexist. It's the wrong mindset to take. See this is the problem with us guys. We see it like a game. _Success_ with women. _Scoring_ with women. Winning the game. Women don't phrase things like this when they talk about men. Men need to see this as a process of relating rather than winning. This is where lots of guys fail, including SA guys. If you don't get anywhere with a girl, that doesn't mean you are a failure. You might not just be able to relate with each other SA or no SA. Why is it that every time you run into someone incompatible, men have to perceive it as a failure on their part? It takes two to tango.
> 
> I have seen low-status beta as **** mother****as get cute girls. They relate to each other and have things in common.


Success with women meaning having a good relationship.

The idea of questioning whether girls are worth the time/effort/money
is an attempt to rationalize away a basic need. Lets decide that
food is not worth it. Then we can pretend we aren't hungry or
just eat dirt.


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## Eyesontheskies (Jan 31, 2013)

ive thought that maybe guys just arent worth it. I have to do all the asking to even get a prom date. Guys always lead me on and then after i have laid my heart out there they say that they see me as a friend. They also always want to get into girls pants which is annoying when you are just looking for a companion and someone to love and they are just looking for a steamy fling.
Maybe guys just aren't worth the time/effort/money? see what generalization feels like?


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## sophia44 (Feb 23, 2013)

Isabelle50 said:


> C'mon man. You can't speak for every woman in the world. In fact, you can't _really_ speak for any woman. And you definitely can't claim to know my preferences better than I know myself. Personally I would rather date an outgoing guy. But many women would prefer someone who is shy because they don't like interacting with a lot of people and the pressure of being around someone who is always talking or always socializing is overwhelming.


It's like they don't think we are all individuals. Every woman is unique and independent.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

MobiusX said:


> why is the guy is expected to pay and do stuff like open doors? I never understood that.


You're not expected to. It would impress someone if you choose to, though.


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## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

TPower said:


> They are still not 100% comfortable around people.


but who is? I don't know anyone who is 100% comfortable around people, but they get over the issues they have that prevent them from doing/achieving the things they want. No they don't come out the other side perfect, because nobody's perfect.


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## Dissonance (Dec 27, 2011)

diamondheart89 said:


> You're not expected to. It would impress someone if you choose to, though.


You will never understand what it feels like to open a door for people and have them literately spit in your face..


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## HustleRose (Jun 19, 2009)

What if you're just not worth their time to give? :stu


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

HustleRose said:


> What if you're just not worth their time to give? :stu


Yes, I don't know of any men whose worth a woman's time anyway. I think personally I think women should be lesbians, because women are only in "leagues" wit other women. No man is in a woman's league.


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## HustleRose (Jun 19, 2009)

theseventhkey said:


> Yes, I don't know of any men whose worth a woman's time anyway. I think personally I think women should be lesbians, because women are only in "leagues" wit other women. No man is in a woman's league.


I'm sorry, I wasn't able to catch the premise of your post because I was too distracted by the grammatical errors.

Could you repeat?


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Dissonance said:


> You will never understand what it feels like to open a door for people and have them literately spit in your face..


Why would anyone spit in your face for something so harmless?  that's strange.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

HustleRose said:


> I'm sorry, I wasn't able to catch the premise of your post because I was too distracted by the grammatical errors.
> 
> Could you repeat?


I'm not smart as you, I'm a man, we all know men's intelligence, is no where near that of a woman's. I'm sorry my grammar is not up to your standards, but as a man it's as good as it's gonna get. I was saying that the only people in a woman's league is other women, men aren't in the same league as women. As you can see my poor grammar and your expert prose, how can a man measure up without failing?


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## HustleRose (Jun 19, 2009)

theseventhkey said:


> I'm not smart as you, I'm a man, we all know men's intelligence, is no where near that of a woman's. I'm sorry my grammar is not up to your standards, but as a man it's as good as it's gonna get. I was saying that the only people in a woman's league is other women, men aren't in the same league as women. As you can see my poor grammar and your expert prose, how can a man measure up without failing?


Your self-deprecation would be a major turn on were it not facetious.


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## Charmander (Sep 5, 2012)

theseventhkey said:


> I'm not smart as you, I'm a man, we all know men's intelligence, is no where near that of a woman's. I'm sorry my grammar is not up to your standards, but as a man it's as good as it's gonna get. I was saying that the only people in a woman's league is other women, men aren't in the same league as women. As you can see my poor grammar and your expert prose, how can a man measure up without failing?


Are you gonna carry on with the pretending to put women on a pedestal charade forever or...?


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## Elad (Dec 6, 2009)

everything takes time, everything worth having takes a bit of effort and the money isn't necessary (not large amounts). Just treat females as friends, as you would anyone else instead of putting them on a pedestal and trying too hard.. they are just people too for ****s sake.

the funny part is all these threads are probably being made by women somewhere else on the internet about guys, so much over analyzing and over thinking, which is usually glaringly obvious to the other person, and off putting.


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

HustleRose said:


> Your self-deprecation would be a major turn on were it not facetious.


Facetious, what a beautiful word, from such a beautiful woman. I'm afraid though I do not know it's meaning, once again my intelligence has failed me. Honestly, I'm just glad you acknowledged me. :blush


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## theseventhkey (Jul 22, 2012)

Charmander said:


> Are you gonna carry on with the pretending to put women on a pedestal charade forever or...?


Why do you think my declarations are not sincere. It upsets me, that you do not believe I honor, respect, and cherish you. I wish there were ways i could prove my words are true to you.


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## Donnie in the Dark (Mar 15, 2011)

This thread is dumb.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

theseventhkey said:


> Facetious, what a beautiful word, from such a beautiful woman. I'm afraid though I do not know it's meaning, once again my intelligence has failed me. Honestly, I'm just glad you acknowledged me. :blush


I will break you.


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

Do men "need" women more or the other way around? 

Thankfully, things are slowly and changing with both genders reaching more parity. Women have already and continue to rapidly catch up to men in terms of income, career and job opportunities, rights, etc. all around the world. We are seeing now that women are chasing after men now as well. They are spending their time, their money, their effort as well. Its no longer just a one-way street and I like it. (Doesn't ever mean that a woman will pursue me though. )

Equality for all!


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## TobeyJuarez (May 16, 2012)

Rahul87 said:


> Do men "need" women more or the other way around?
> 
> Thankfully, things are slowly and changing with both genders reaching more parity. Women have already and continue to rapidly catch up to men in terms of income, career and job opportunities, rights, etc. all around the world. We are seeing now that women are chasing after men now as well. They are spending their time, their money, their effort as well. Its no longer just a one-way street and I like it. (Doesn't ever mean that a woman will pursue me though. )
> 
> Equality for all!


what are u talking about? how many women have approached you? how many have asked you out? i can honestly say it has only happened to me once... in 6th grade... and i was on the bad end of a cruel joke


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

illmatic1 said:


> what are u talking about? how many women have approached you? how many have asked you out? i can honestly say it has only happened to me once... in 6th grade... and i was on the bad end of a cruel joke


Just because it never happened to me, doesn't mean it isn't happening. And yes, it is starting off slow but it is occurring at least. Let women chase men and spend money on them, let men be homemakers, let women have exactly equal pay to men, etc.

We've had thousands of years of men chasing after women first and courting them and winning them over, etc. Its obviously going to take a while for the other way around to gain steam, but it will happen, I promise you.

I can still be happy for other men that women now are approaching them first, even if it never, ever happens to me. I don't expect it to happen to me anyways.  And we already have more men than women on the planet anyways, especially in some certain locations on Earth. You can totally expect some life-long bachelors, and that just can't be helped, no matter how eligible, handsome, rich, etc. you are. And I am far from a spring chicken, so I'm doubly screwed. Oh well.....


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

pita said:


> It's weird to me that "getting a girl" (or not getting a girl, or deciding never to get a girl) is such a hot topic on this site when it _seems_ that a lot of guys here don't actually like girls at all.


What makes you think that? I think its a lot of men here that just want to give up on girls entirely because of their frustration and always getting shot down, etc. Some men don't even want to try in the first place because they are so convinced that every girl will reject them forever, their cognitions at work. I'm more of the latter.


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## vtec (Mar 11, 2013)

hey man, im in the exact same situation, n all i can tell you is never give up. I know it sounds cliche, but it is so true. If u just get up n blatenly say that girls arent worth it, than u have given up to early. Even if you constantly get shot down, rejected etc, keeppushin, not only will this make yo stronger, but in the end you will succeed. And if you dont believe me, Im also 19, never had a girlfriend, nevr had sex, never kissed a girl, and have never really had girls show much interest in me. However, in spite of all this i still kep trying, cuz i know that in the end, im the one benefiting the most.


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## nubly (Nov 2, 2006)

> What if girls just aren't worth the time/effort/money?


Then you'll have a very strong dominant hand.


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## BillDauterive (Oct 24, 2012)

nubly said:


> Then you'll have a very strong dominant hand.


I think I'll get castrated beforehand. Just give up emotionally and literally physically.


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)

theseventhkey said:


> Of course they are worth it, every girl in this world is beautiful, loving, understanding, every girl should be pampered and cherished like a unicorn. We all should put our time and money in every woman on earth because they are so high up in the mountains and we are so low in the dirt. If a girl/woman should ever take interest in you, you should thank the gods from above for blessing you.


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## HitGirl (Mar 12, 2013)

Yeah, this is going to last...


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)

OP reminds me alot of myself, But I really don't have any feelings towards women. Sure I'll check em out, I watch pr0n, I even say "dayumn!!" when a girl with a nice body walks by. But at the end of the day, I honestly feel there is nothing to gain from relationships and being friends is much easier.

But since were generalizing, why is that women that flirt with a man get so upset when the man doesn't adknowledge the flirting and act on it? Seriously, I had 2 girls last year that were sending all kinds of straight foward non-confusing signals and I got horrid looks from both of them when I didn't ask them out. 

It made me LOL though.


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## HitGirl (Mar 12, 2013)

HilarityEnsues said:


> OP reminds me alot of myself, But I really don't have any feelings towards women. Sure I'll check em out, I watch pr0n, I even say "dayumn!!" when a girl with a nice body walks by. But at the end of the day, I honestly feel there is nothing to gain from relationships and being friends is much easier.
> 
> But since were generalizing, why is that women that flirt with a man get so upset when the man doesn't adknowledge the flirting and act on it? Seriously, I had 2 girls last year that were sending all kinds of straight foward non-confusing signals and I got horrid looks from both of them when I didn't ask them out.
> 
> It made me LOL though.


It's because _you're_ missing out, not them.


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)

I don't feel that way, but I'm sure other folks do.


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## HitGirl (Mar 12, 2013)

HilarityEnsues said:


> I don't feel that way, but I'm sure other folks do.


If you keep passing up girls that are interested though, you're going to be 30 and have never had a GF and be screaming "fml" at the top of your lungs. You might want to strike while the iron's hot as they say.


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)

I had a few girlfriends in my younger years, I was screaming FML at that point.


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## HitGirl (Mar 12, 2013)

HilarityEnsues said:


> I had a few girlfriends in my younger years, I was screaming FML at that point.


What, having sex regulary was too much for you? j/k  Everything worth having can be stressful sometimes. You'll see as you mature.


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)

I'm matured and still a virgin, I lost interest in sex the day I learned how to


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## HitGirl (Mar 12, 2013)

HilarityEnsues said:


> I'm matured and still a virgin, I lost interest in sex the day I learned how to


Well good for you. I might be doing the same thing in the near future even though I hate sex.


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)




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## HitGirl (Mar 12, 2013)

HilarityEnsues said:


>


:lol Read my two threads and take a guess


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)

Lol, You created those threads and told me I should date.


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)

Hmm, OP lives like 40 miles from me. Next time I have a girl trying to get me to ask her out, can I send her your way?


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## HitGirl (Mar 12, 2013)

HilarityEnsues said:


> Lol, You created those threads and told me I should date.


I was frustrated. But the way I see it, guys need girls way more. If I get horny in my mid thiries, I can just become a cougar and let young hot guys **** me. You on the other hand will be missing out in your sexual prime and what if you get ED or some **** when you get 30? If girls are showing interest in you, jump on it now while your not bald and have a pot belly. Or at least get rich so it won't even matter.


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## HilarityEnsues (Oct 4, 2012)

The latter appeals more to me. I honestly could care less if they show interest in me, I've got school and work I need to focus on. 7 days in a week and all of them are booked for me.


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