# SAS Cocktail Lounge



## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Come on in! Have a seat! Take a load off!










You'll only find cool jazz on the jukebox.





Just made myself a G + T with a little splash of lemon juice. You know...when I was just a sprout I thought gin was gross because it tasted like pine needles. Now that I've grown older and matured I still think gin tastes like pine needles but I find it delicious.

PLEASE NO MINORS! Don't want the mods to shut this down because we're serving underaged kids!


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

I'll have a bourbon on the rocks, Lloyd.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Do you want ice with that?


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

No, just the rocks. But get me a funnel. I'm going to make this a bit more interesting.


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

I don't drink aaaah ahhh what do I dooooo. I am uncomfortable!


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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

:lurk


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## atticusfinch (Dec 18, 2010)

Spindrift said:


> No, just the rocks. But get me a funnel. I'm going to make this a bit more interesting.


ha ha, i see what you did there, bud.


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## rdrr (Dec 31, 2008)

Vodka tonic, please.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Perfectionist said:


> I don't drink aaaah ahhh what do I dooooo. I am uncomfortable!


Club soda for the lady.


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

^ 

You called me lady. Heee.


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

Hey, this isn't the Long Island Ice Tea I asked for! This is from Staten Island!


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## kesker (Mar 29, 2011)

Cosmo please w/ Grey Goose


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

You can put those glasses away....... I think I'll be ordering by the gallon........


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

^You look a little young. Let's seem some ID.


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

^Ahahaha bartender BURN.


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## Just Lurking (Feb 8, 2007)

StevenGlansberg said:


> ^You look a little young. Let's seem some ID.


Ummmmmm.... Why, uhhh, certainly.... Yes, my ID... uhh, here you go.


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## JamieHasAnxiety (Feb 15, 2011)

Gimmie anything idc, I just wanna get drunk and forget. Mmm


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## F1X3R (Jul 20, 2009)




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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

Perfectionist said:


> I don't drink aaaah ahhh what do I dooooo. I am uncomfortable!





gomenne said:


> Me too :teeth


:group


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## crimsoncora (Mar 29, 2011)

I will have cranberry with orange juice on zee rocks plzz

Oh and all of spindrifts drinks r on me, i like him incoherent and defenseless!


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

No. Please. Somebody stop her. The horror. The horror.

(I'm totally serious. Can you tell?)

Anything but that. The end is nigh.


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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

I'll stop her!!! :bat :wife

:lol :b


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

You're not going to take that from her, are you cora? I mean, you paid for those drinks and everything. This is an affront to everything that's good and true. Do it for great justice, cora. Come on, man.


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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

:eek Okay fine, I won't stop her then. :roll

:lol :b


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## crimsoncora (Mar 29, 2011)

^^Good! Cuz i was about to lay down some spectre justice!

Drifter be merry and drink! My plan wont work unless your impaired beyond fighting back!

Bartender! Get this man some more vodka!


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

Wait. This isn't going the way I planned. What's going on?


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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

:lol

:tiptoe


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## crimsoncora (Mar 29, 2011)

Oh shizzz......


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

crimsoncora said:


> Bartender! Get this man some more vodka!


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## crimsoncora (Mar 29, 2011)

^^you know ur face will get stuck like that.

Tsk tsk


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

Stuck like what? That's my neutral face.


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

Come on, bartender, I'm just one year away! I need me some whiskey!


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

need2bnormal said:


> I don't have an ID ... my dog ate it.


:no

You can't drink but I'll hire you as live entertainment.



Monroee said:


> Come on, bartender, I'm just one year away! I need me some whiskey!


Close enough but whiskey is not very ladylike! Here's a mimosa.


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## diamondheart89 (Mar 21, 2011)

Long Island....extra long. :clap


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

StevenGlansberg said:


> Close enough but whiskey is not very ladylike! Here's a mimosa.


To be honest, I have no idea the different types of drinks. I've only had whiskey. :b


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## silentcliche (Jun 30, 2010)

I need me a fifth of scotch. I must honour my best friend I lost today.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

silentcliche said:


> I need me a fifth of scotch. I must honour my best friend I lost today.


Drinks are on the house. Sorry about your friend...seriously.


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## Aphexfan (Jan 12, 2011)

Ill take a gallon of jack daniels please :drunk uke :lol


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## Jcgrey (Feb 5, 2011)

hmm I'll take Absolut Vodka straight please


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## Tsunawada (Nov 12, 2010)

Got about 3 years to go before I'm legal.

Will a shoddily made fake ID suffice?


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## Greg415 (Aug 24, 2010)

Basil Hayden straight please. Btw are there any craft beer drinkers/enthusiasts in here..


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Mondays is 1.99 Shrimp Cocktail night!


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## Perfectionist (Mar 19, 2004)

Shirley Temple please! I am so fly.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Perfectionist said:


> Shirley Temple please! I am so fly.


Here's an extra cherry.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Was going to put on my PJ's but then decided to put on a polo and open a bottle of wine. I normally don't wear polos or drink wine.

(I don't normally drink this often but I'm all alone for once and have literally nothing to do until Monday)

Tuesday is Ladies Night!


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## LifeGoesOn (Feb 7, 2011)

StevenGlansberg said:


> Tuesday is Ladies Night!


:boogie


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## Aphexfan (Jan 12, 2011)

StevenGlansberg said:


> Tuesday is Ladies Night!


:rain


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Aphexfan said:


> :rain


Just have your lady order the drinks and pass them to you.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

Sangria please. 

ok, got some bar jokes - 

van gogh is sitting at a bar when the barman asks him, can I get you a drink? 

Vin says, I got one ere.

two peanuts were walking down the street. one was assaulted.

You can't be funny and be stupid, although Stephen Hawking's pretty clever but he'd be hard pushed to do standup.


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## jagmusic (Oct 18, 2010)

One Pint of Ale and a shot of Jameson for me please. *tips $2*


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

One Red Mocha Cooler. Less ice this time, Dean.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

'nother sangria please. 

two atoms were walking down the street. suddenly one atom stops and says "oh no! I've lost an ion!"

the second atom says, "are you sure?"

the first atom says "I'm positive!"

y'all are sure gettin pretty.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

leonardess said:


> van gogh is sitting at a bar when the barman asks him, can I get you a drink?
> 
> Vin says, I got one ere.


lol.

More!

......

White or red?


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

red and sangria 


Shakespeare is making trouble at a bar. the bartender yells at him, you're barred!


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## crimsoncora (Mar 29, 2011)

Shizzz i dont drink, what do i do?

Erm......... Sprite and cherry lemonade!


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

A glass of your finest alpaca milk, barkeep.


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## F1X3R (Jul 20, 2009)

<


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Spindrift said:


> A glass of your finest alpaca milk, barkeep.


Straight from the teet to your glass, my man.










^Badass!


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

LAST CALL!

I need2bgoingtobed...


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## mrbojangles (Oct 8, 2009)

Hey barkeep, hit me with a dry martini will ya.


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## mrbojangles (Oct 8, 2009)

I've been waiting 28 minutes for a dry martini, horrible service.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

On the house!

Tonight is open mic night! I'll start!


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## jagmusic (Oct 18, 2010)

I think I'll indulge in a White Russian tonight...(but I'm not sure she knows about it yet...) ah, I'm just yankin' your chain Steve. There are no Russians in here. *Tips change*

*Signs up for open mic night* (see sig)


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## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

OMG, i'm out of beer:









But the dog isn't:


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## dollparts (May 26, 2009)

Lychee martini and a shot of vodka please.


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## bezoomny (Feb 10, 2007)

Gimme a whiskey, gingerale on the side. And don't be stingy, baby!


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

This is turning out to be a classy joint.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Here's how to make a bloody mary:

Fill large glass with ice
Add your preferred amount of vodka
Sprinkle on celery salt and black pepper
Add a few drops of Worcestershire sauce
A liberal amount of hot sauce 
Add a splash of pickle juice
A slightly smaller splash of lemon juice
Fill glass with clamato
Top off with more celery salt and black pepper
Garnish with a pickle and anything else
Enjoy!

Don't buy the premixed stuff!


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## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

leonardess said:


> This is turning out to be a classy joint.


His actual last words were something like: "the biggest mistake i made was switching from scotch to martinis" Bogie rules!


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## ForgetMeForever (May 3, 2011)

I can't decide between a *Mojito* or a *Cuba Libre*. I only allow myself one drink a day anymore.

Um, make it a Cuba Libre. A really large Cuba Libre. (wink wink)

My dog, the sweetest dog in the world, has been seriously ill for awhile. Pancreatitis, diabetes and anemia. To top it off, she has to go cold turkey off her addiction to the food on my husband's plate. It's hard on them both.

I hope the drinks aren't expensive here, bartender, as her medical bills are financially ruinous. But she is worth it all and more. Just have to sell the place a little sooner than I expected.


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

[Glansberg, you make the best threads, :lol]

Me and Sam Adams would like a Sam Adams please.









(yeah, I know that was corny as hell, but whatev's. I couldn't resist. :b)


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## Devdas (Mar 17, 2011)




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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

Sam Adams is starting to get old and restless.


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## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

Ron Burgundy could calm him down with some Jazz Flute


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## tutliputli (Feb 22, 2009)

I'd like a quadruple rum with a tot of coke please.


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## WalkingDisaster (Nov 27, 2010)

http://www.merchandisingplaza.co.uk/images/products/10006/img2.jpg

One of these please, just like The Dude.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

I need something strong, and fast.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

/barchat

okay, so I been doing some work for the neighbour. I planted 400 bamboo seedlings the other day. He pays me in Sacajawea dollars. What he does, see, is he buys them with his credit card so he racks up air miles but can still use cash to pay for stuff, see? So he gives me a couple of rolls of these dollar coins. So now, I go into town and pay for stuff with nothing but these coins, see, so I go into starbucks and they call me "Sacajawea dollars". Only now, he's started buying the new president series. the first one out is.... James Madison. 
See, look at this coin - what does he look like? I'll tell you what he looks like to me - Larry from the 3 stooges with his slab of forehead and the frizzy hair around the edges. This sucks, man - it's total BS! Here, take 4 of these coins and get me some vodka pronto. And stop calling me "James"!!


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

ForgetMeForever said:


> I can't decide between a *Mojito* or a *Cuba Libre*. I only allow myself one drink a day anymore.
> 
> Um, make it a Cuba Libre. A really large Cuba Libre. (wink wink)
> 
> ...


Sorry to hear that. What' sa Cuba Libre? Sounds exotic...


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

tutliputli said:


> I'd like a quadruple rum with a tot of coke please.


A tot? Tater tot?


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

MojoCrunch said:


> Sam Adams is starting to get old and restless.


Sorry! Haven't had any customers in awhile. Bottle or tap?


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

WalkingDisaster said:


> http://www.merchandisingplaza.co.uk/images/products/10006/img2.jpg
> 
> One of these please, just like The Dude.












I like to top mine off with coke.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

leonardess said:


> I need something strong, and fast.


Like a shot?


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

whatever you got.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Try this kid.

/gives shots of liquid cocaine


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## ForgetMeForever (May 3, 2011)

StevenGlansberg said:


> Sorry to hear that. What' sa Cuba Libre? Sounds exotic...


Thanks for the sympathy. She seems to be doing really well on the insulin shots I give her twice a day.

Cuba Libre recipe:

Ingredients:
- two shots of white rum
- half a shot of lime juice
- cola

Method:
Pour the rum and lime juice over ice. Top up with cola.

Garnish:
a twist and a wedge of lime.

Not as exotic as it sounds, I'm afraid.

Oh, the above recipe is taken from the book _"Shaken Not Stirred: 101 Cocktails to Make and Enjoy!"_ compiled by Paul Effeny.

At one point in my life I had of daydreams of throwing dazzling cocktail parties and the liquor cabinet to back it up.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

StevenGlansberg said:


> Try this kid.
> 
> /gives shots of liquid cocaine


thanks. now I will be an even bigger *******.


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

StevenGlansberg said:


> Sorry! Haven't had any customers in awhile. Bottle or tap?


Tap for Mr.Sam. Obviously he's the only one that likes a weaksauce beer named after himself.

For me, I'd like a dead nazi (nat-zi!). 
Hint:









Cause I wanna get f***********cked up.


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## rockyraccoon (Dec 13, 2010)

God I haven't been drunk for months so I might as well start now.

I'll have a double Sambuca on the rocks.

A tequila shot.

And an Alabama Slammer.

*bartender: repeat every 15 minutes*


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## Spindrift (Mar 3, 2011)

I'll take a homeopathic beer.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

MojoCrunch said:


> Tap for Mr.Sam. Obviously he's the only one that likes a weaksauce beer named after himself.
> 
> For me, I'd like a dead nazi (nat-zi!).
> Hint:
> ...


Sounds wonderfully awful.


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

StevenGlansberg said:


> Sounds wonderfully awful.


Tastes just like toothpaste :lol


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## ReachinOut (May 10, 2011)

Crown and Coke and I'm set


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

^Hey it's REACHIN' OUT. TOUCHIN' ME. TOUCHIN' YOU...


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

you're all *******s. more liquid cocaine please


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## WalkingDisaster (Nov 27, 2010)

StevenGlansberg said:


> I like to top mine off with coke.


Coca-Cola or cocaine?


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## WalkingDisaster (Nov 27, 2010)

I'm assuming as this is a virtual cocktail lounge there won't be an age limit?


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## Devdas (Mar 17, 2011)




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## WalkingDisaster (Nov 27, 2010)

Vishnu said:


>


Whaaaaaat? Even on the internet?


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## tutliputli (Feb 22, 2009)

StevenGlansberg said:


> A tot? Tater tot?


Tot

-noun

1. A small child.

2. Chiefly British. A small portion of a beverage, especially a dram of liquor.

3. A small quantity of anything.

(Not the first one :b)


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

WalkingDisaster said:


> Coca-Cola or cocaine?


Coca-cola...:um


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## WalkingDisaster (Nov 27, 2010)

StevenGlansberg said:


> Coca-cola...:um


Sorry, I've been watching a lot of gangster films lately, and when someone says coke in them they never mean cola.


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

*stumbles in* Glansberg!









I need something where I won't remember my name. I'm up for anything.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

^Soco and lime shots! I try not to do shots anymore but that sounds delish right now.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Okay now I have it in my head that I want to try making old fashioneds with SoCo. Since I'll have the SoCo might as well try an alabama slammer.

Going to be an expensive trip to the grocery store.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

80 dollars later...:um


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Soco old Fashioned is good. Actually I don't even know if it's an old fashioned...soco + sweet and sour + bitters + grenadine...:stu


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Alabama Slammer = wowowowowowowowowowowow

It's like an orange creamsicle.


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

^^ Why hello there. *peers across the bar*








Hey, Glansberg? Send that wonderful person over there her favorite drink. Yes, the Hockey Riot Investigator.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Are you guys hitting on each other...:tiptoe


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

^^ Didn't know buying a drink for a friend qualified me as being into girls. Oh well, slide one over to the hockey riot investigator. *creepy smile*


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Was just wondering...8)

Soco + amaretto + coke = not sure what it is but it's good.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

since we're doing state names, and since I have SA and all, can I have a Tennessee Timid? Or, since it's not been a great day, how 'bout a California Crapper.


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## leonardess (Jun 30, 2009)

Or, for my British friends, a Slough Slapper.


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## rockyraccoon (Dec 13, 2010)

Ok bartender, now I'm fealing the booze but I really need to get tanked.

What do you say you make up some Zombies.

Thanks bartender.

1 part white rum
1 part golden rum
1 part dark rum
1 part apricot brandy
1 part pineapple juice
1 part papaya juice
½ part 151-proof rum
Dash of grenadine or other syrup


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## GunnyHighway (Sep 28, 2010)

I want a whiskey and coke. 

(I know I'm boring, leave me alone.)


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## epril (Mar 24, 2009)

sloe gin fizz please.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Not my favorite but they do have pleasant commercials.


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## FairleighCalm (May 20, 2007)

Ill take a heinekin bar keep!


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

This fine young gentleman will be serving your drinks from now on.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Since there was a sun on it I thought it would be like Summery but really it's all about the proceeds going to renewable energy sources so I was like awwwwwww but it's actually not a bad beer.

I pretend to know a lot about beers and how they taste but I don't. :blank I like this one though.

And I kind of bought it because Shine On by the Kooks is a cool song.


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## RenegadeReloaded (Mar 12, 2011)

2 black beers pls, usual extroversion dose


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## rumjungle (Feb 13, 2009)

Happy-hour!
Half-price on all cocktails for the next hour!


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## Oscar7 (May 20, 2011)

Alcohol.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

This is a great beer. Not sure if it's nation wide? Has a delicious but not overpowering lemony taste...enjoyed by men _and_ women!


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## Hideko (Jul 2, 2011)

I only need a cup, have keg will travel.:boogie


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## plusminusinfinity (Apr 28, 2011)

a glass of milk please


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## rawrguy (Mar 29, 2008)

^do they really serve milk there?


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## mrmarc (Jul 10, 2011)

Right now i would love a 'No Problem', not only is the name appropriate but it's also what it consists of lol.

Cherry Brandy
Malibu/White Coconut Rum
Orange Juice
Ice

You can also add lemonade if you wanna water it down..


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## hickorysmoked (Mar 7, 2010)

Keep the guinness flowing


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## Ironpain (Aug 8, 2010)

Smooth man real Smooth. Listen my Agent just called their casting for my new tv Series Supermodel Crime Club, I need something strong, no wait better make that something with a real kick in it, no that's not going to work, scratch all that got to find something to relax, Bartender Vodka on the Rocks with a Twist of Lime. I've created a list of dating tips. 

#1 Know yourself. Highlight your best Assets. 

Solid Car
Solid Physique 
Solid Hair 
Solid 

That article you saw on the news this morning about my sordid affair with a British Tabloid Reporter is totally Bogus I wasn't even wearing a speedo. Now take nothing I say here serious I'm already drunk I kind of had 6 Cold shots before I came here


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## MojoCrunch (Mar 25, 2011)

Sup Glansberg. *IRISH CARBOMB PLEEEEEAAASE.*


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

MojoCrunch said:


> Sup Glansberg. *IRISH CARBOMB PLEEEEEAAASE.*


Nice. Might buy stuff to make these tomorrow.

9 days of work in a row...feel like I need to drink.


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## Ventura (May 5, 2009)

Either , stealing it from my parents stash ... or , having someone buy it for me :


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## au Lait (Sep 8, 2010)

some might say 11:30 in the afternoon is too early to start drinking.

i say i'm getting a head start.


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## Fantas Eyes (Mar 23, 2011)

I don't drink, so like a soda or something?


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## Keith (Aug 30, 2008)

I'd like two pints of ale in a one pint glass please. Impossible you say? Then just give me an iv to the tap then.


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## StevenGlansberg (Apr 1, 2009)

Old Fashioneds are the new in thing.


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## RawrJessiRawr (Nov 3, 2010)

I could use a drink right about now lol


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## Barette (Jan 17, 2012)

I feel like I could use a drink all the time.


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## Mr Mug (Sep 13, 2011)

I'll have a Red Headed ****. :lol It's a real drink, really it is. Click Here


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## Tentative (Dec 27, 2011)

Make that two. I'd love to try one of those. :yes

I'm feeling generous...all drinks are on me tonight.


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## Rossy (Jan 15, 2011)

Hmm sounds like good,I will have a Red Headed **** and I suppose a drink would be good too


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## WalkingDisaster (Nov 27, 2010)

It's been months and I never got my damn White Russian! I expect in the post over the next few days...


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## xTKsaucex (Jun 23, 2010)

Meanwhile, back in England*

Man its good to be 20 over here and allowed to buy alcohol. Bottoms up on Jagermeister and Goldschlager.


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## Ashley1990 (Aug 27, 2011)

May i have some pineaple juice??


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## mezzoforte (May 16, 2010)

This is the only drink I want right now.
Heavenly. o.o


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## Secretly Pretentious (Dec 18, 2011)

I normally don't drink, but I'm very curious to see what kind of drunk I am. I'm guessing bipolar drunk. Who wants to place a wager?


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## mzmz (Feb 26, 2012)

oooh i'll take that bet!
how do we find out??

oh, and Barkeep! I'll take a Vodka and soda, please!


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## Xtraneous (Oct 18, 2011)

I swear that's me in that ID.


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## crookedsmile (Dec 29, 2011)

A virgin cuba libre with extra tiny umbrellas please. :b


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