# Lying to psychologist



## Swiftwind (Feb 5, 2005)

I haven't been posting here for about a year or so (I can't quite remember), some of you might know me though. I have an update, I've started seeing a psychologist about my SA (FINALLY it was a tough and long journey to get to where I am today).

Anyway, the thing that annoys me is my psychologist is supposed to be someone I can tell everything too, but I sometimes find myself lying to her. I said I had a boyfriend for about 3 months. That isn't so true, I only had one for a very little time. I also told her that I'd be going away for Christmas, which isn't true. And I make it out to seem like I have more friends than I do, and in reality I only have 3 good friends who I don't see _that_ often.

I don't know why I end up lying to her, and I'm not generally the lying type. It really annoys me though, because it somewhat downplays the extent of my SA. I guess I'm kind of ashamed of the reality of my anxiety-riddled life.

Does anyone else find themselves lying to their therapist?


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## Higolo (Dec 10, 2006)

All the time 
I feel too embarrassed to tell them the truth.


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## illb4u (Dec 19, 2006)

how long have you been seing the therapist? has it helped at all?


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## SAlovesme (Nov 15, 2006)

i try my best to tell em the truth but i do find my self lying sometimes as to not let myself seem as pathetic as i feel...its probably not a good thing considering were paying them to be the one person that doesn't judge us. :yes 

They just want to help us so i think we should be more truthful with them...lets face it they've seen it all before an i highly doubt they go home an laugh at us.

illb4u: I have only been three times so far an just having someone to talk has helped alot!! He puts alot of things into perspective for me and i find it very healthy for my mind...even though it usually just highlights how insane i am


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## Classified (Dec 7, 2004)

I don't believe I ever lied to my therapist, but I didn't give the entire story a few times. If it isn't comfortable for you to tell them the truth, you can try to dodge the question. But they will probably not give up that easily.

You should tell the truth to them, it is the only way they can really help you.


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## lonesomeboy (Aug 29, 2005)

yes i do the same to my counsellor. Its so damn embarrassing and shameful telling her the FULL story, I make a little white lies to make it seem that Iam not THAT big of a loser. Although this might affect her assesment of my condition and ultimatetly the necessary treatment might not be adequate, but I can't bear to tell her what a sad existence i've been living.


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## Bon (Dec 24, 2005)

No, I am brutally honest with my shrink, therapist. From my view point, if I'm going to improve, they need to know which ave to take with me, or else I would be treading water.

I think it's important that you also find the right one for you......One that takes the time to get to know you, that ask detailed question, as I read in another post, so many diagnosis overlap, it takes a pro to.......

Please, for your best interest....Tell him/her the truth, they have heard it all.


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## Swiftwind (Feb 5, 2005)

I've been going to the psychologist for around 3 months now (all up about 8 sessions or so.. I can't really remember).

The thing is, I think I have been coving up the 'truth' for so long now that it's just become a habbit to lie about things that effect me because of SA. If I wasn't ashamed of anything I'd tell her all. The main thing about my SA is that I HATE to feel embarrased, no matter who I'm talking to/who I'm around - it's what I fear the most (and unfortuantely I've been in a lot of situations that make me feel embarrased).

It isn't as easy as just saying 'stop lying'.. my mind has just been thinking like this for so long.

Anyway, I'm glad to know I'm not the only one out there who's like this. I just feel that I'm not helping myself completely by not being 100% honest.


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## User (Mar 20, 2004)

I don't think I've ever lied to my therapist. I might've bent the truth a few times, and I've dodged a question or two, but I've usually been painfully honest. I've seen two therapists. The first one wasn't helping me, but seeing him for a few months loosened me up quite a bit. By the time I started seeing my current therapist, I have been able to say just about everything I need to.

Swiftwind, you should congratulate yourself for having the courage to go into therapy. Seeing a therapist is a HUGE step for us SAers! Oddly, this fact isn't stressed enough on here. Simply by going to therapy each week, you're fighting SA.

As for lying, you know that you shouldn't do it--if your therapist doesn't have an accurate idea of your SA/life, then she can't fully help you. Don't forget that dealing with embarassment is one of the reasons you're in therapy. And you'll never get over it if you continue to lie. Embarassment is one of my biggest issues, too. But after being open (for months) with a stranger who's probing my psyche, I've been able to do stuff (like confront and stand up to people in my life) that I never would've been able to do before. I'm still struggling, but it's a start.

Good luck.


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## emeraldoceans (Sep 13, 2006)

No ive never lied to my therapist, i really cant see the point in doing that. You run the risk of not recieving the proper treatment and being misdiagnosed if you are not honest with her. In order to be able to fully understand your problem and help you, she will need to know everything about you. Its hard sometimes but just tell it like it is, this is the only way you will fully benefit from it.


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## sonya99 (Sep 5, 2005)

i used to with my old therapists, but i'm tyring hard not to get into that habit with my current one


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## SADLiath (Aug 5, 2005)

That is EXACTLY why I finally gave up on seeing my psychologist.

At first I was totally honest ... I had a diagnosis, I was on meds (seeing my GP every couple weeks, too, for that), etc. Then about my third visit, he asked about romance. I told him about the person I was dating at the time.

HE KNEW THEIR PARENTS (who were also both psychologists). And he TOLD me so. I had never been so embarrassed in my life. :um 

So I clammed up. When he tried to prod me into talking, I finally started lying. I was terrified that he'd comment on something else that I considered private. Naturally I lied about it, just like I do with strangers who are poking into my privacy. I couldn't make myself tell him what was wrong, either.

I stopped going.


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## ColdFury (Nov 6, 2003)

I don't lie to mine, but there are certain thoughts and such that I do not discuss with him.


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## LarryDavid (Oct 17, 2006)

You should tell her this stuff you are telling us. :stu


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## AskJeeves (May 25, 2005)

*Re: re: Lying to psychologist*



LarryDavid said:


> You should tell her this stuff you are telling us. :stu


very true

by lying to your psychologist your only making things worse as your psychologist can only help you with the things your telling him/her and if your telling him/her lies then how is that going to benefit you?


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