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## QuietbutBoss (Dec 8, 2015)

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## appledapple (Mar 27, 2018)

i have not done a group therapy, but it seems like a good idea, like you, i'd much rather have the attention not set wholly on me, so a group would divide that attention


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## Kevin001 (Jan 2, 2015)

I have...it was ok but I don't think its as effective as one on one. Sometimes you just feel different even from people with similar issues.


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## SwtSurrender (Nov 24, 2014)

Yeh, it's ****ing hot. At first I had alot of anticipatory anxiety but then I distracted myself with other activities and told myself I would deal with the situation when I am in it not now when I am weeks away from it. It does feel like you're the only one there who has social anxiety as others seem to talk way more than you. Well it was harder for me because I was the only girl, even though I did try hard to be like one of the guys. At first I was completely egoistic and irritated and ignored people who tried to talk to me. My bad! But see, I wasn't as loosened up as I am in my good days. You have to let go/replace your ego (your identity with your thoughts, especially the excessive irrationally negative and anxious ones) and transcend into Eckhart Tolle and "Overcoming Social Anxiety: Step By Step - Audio Therapy Program by Dr. Richards". 

It's not a quick fix, it does take time to shift into another state of consciousness and enlightenment as it takes time to replace bad habits with good ones. But shyeah, the groups are great if you can go out and hang out together in the evenings. What I really liked about it is that for once in my life felt like I belonged in a group of "friends" while hanging out in a social setting. A great once in a lifetime experience I have to say! You learn alot! I was also getting very aroused.... We spent 10 weeks together and every week was a new adventure of going out and interacting with social situations! Ah I laughed and talked and really got close. You should try to get close as well! If there was a girl I would probably try to go down on her.... Maybe in the future!

I find it easier now-a-days to initiate small talk or just ask a stranger a question. It seemed I was going on about it (my life) the same way as I was in those 10 weeks with the group therapy. And that never happened in the past unless I was taking Prozac! So it is a huge change for me. I might not be cured but I have learned how to manage and prevent those idiotic loop-wheel of the same old same old bullying liars in my head. I can finally shut them up and stick something more proactive in there which in the end makes me feel comfortable and great about myself. And I keep going. I also like this forum as I can record my entire life on here and try to help others and be surrounded by other helpful people (although some more whiny than others), it still does some good. Let us not forget or ignore those who whine more than we do, as we once were in their position a few years ago.


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## SFC01 (Feb 10, 2016)

SwtSurrender said:


> It's not a quick fix, it does take time to shift into another state of consciousness and enlightenment


Does the book come with magic mushrooms or something ?

Anyway, group therapy, without sounding bad, and it will, but I got pissed off having to listen to new people banging on about crap each week so ditched it. I dozed off during one week.


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## SwtSurrender (Nov 24, 2014)

SFC01 said:


> Does the book come with magic mushrooms or something ?
> 
> Anyway, group therapy, without sounding bad, and it will, but I got pissed off having to listen to new people banging on about crap each week so ditched it. I dozed off during one week.


Yeah, it's more like a pop-up book, for me I got a huge cock and I rode it to enlightenment~ Yes, I agree about getting irritated with people who bang on about crap each week, but I only felt that way cuz I didn't have the guts to get up and bang on about my own crap even longer because I would have just to show them how much they irritated me. If I go back into group therapy, I will make sure to ride a huge **** beforehand so I can talk for more than 5 minutes. I would like to irritate people as well, it's fun when you're high.


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## JungHeart (Apr 11, 2018)

Group is a long-term solution. One-on-one is a quick solution.

If you go to group, give it time, and, most importantly, identify with others, even when it seems impossible to do so.

The biggest mistake people make with group is to compare themselves with others instead of trying to find similarities.

We all have the same psychologies, so similarities aren't too difficult to tune into when we know to look for them.

I have yet to see someone change, on a fundamental level, unless they've gone to group or similar for at least one year.


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## SplendidBob (May 28, 2014)

Have done one on one therapy for a year and a half, I love it (literally, really enjoy going). Have done short CBT groups for anxiety, depression and "well being". Basically just sitting and listening and some odd stuff with people in the groups.

Obviously those kinds of things are pretty much just getting basic CBT out to people who can't read a leaflet on their own (the people there usually struggle understanding it). 

Long term one on one therapy is great, though I am a bit dependent on my therapist now, will be unpleasant after the lest session next week. Groups were useless in terms of the content but were helpful in interaction type stuff and learning to tolerate being bored / irritated and had exposure value. 

No groups or anything specifically for SA here.


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## Savvy (May 16, 2018)

I have only done one on one therapy and don't know how I would open up in a group setting.


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## itsonlyamatteroftime (Apr 23, 2018)

I've done it a few times but I found it too overwhelming to continue. The idea of speaking in front of a group was too much for me. I wish I could find a irl group in my area that focused on social anxiety primarily. I think I wouldn't feel so alien compared to everyone else if that was the case. SA seems like an entirely different beast than generalized anxiety and depression (not to say that those aren't terrible too, they're something I also suffer from.) The breathing and relaxing techniques they taught were useful, but during the session itself I was just always in a state of panic. I might try it again in the future.


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## Maslow (Dec 24, 2003)

I did group CBT. It was just another in a long line of failures for me. People in the group hated me, but one of the female facilitators asked me to go out to dinner with her. WTF?

I also did a self-esteem group. I said something about how I was treated growing up. One of the facilitators made the snide comment, "Our parents did the best they could." So, I guess that means, since I was such a loser, they couldn't refrain from being abusive.


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## Eternal Solitude (Jun 11, 2017)

I did. But not for S.A.D. I hated it. Met some really bad people there. I know that modern society tells you not to be judgmental, but I disagree. Judgment is an indispensable survival skill. 



-“Look at that guy that just entered the drug store wearing a ski mask! I think he is about to rob the store”

-“Don’t be so judgmental! He is probably wearing a mask because he has hemorrhoids and is too embarrassed to show his face...”


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## Tuan Jie (Apr 6, 2017)

@QuietbutBoss
I've lived in a therapeutic community for a year and I've been in several other groups. Groups are much more intensive than one on one therapy in my experience. If you're considering a group because you want to be able to hide, you may be surprised. In a decent group this will be exposed for the issue it is. Dealing with the issues of other group members can be a massive downside. I'd say you need quite a bit of assertivity dealing with that, which can be the perfect challenge for you at some point in time.

Nothing therapeutic is going to happen within your comfort zone. The challenge is to come out of it, but not so much that it overwhelmes you. It's a delicate balance and there's no one way of doing this. If you don't have any experience with therapy and you don't feel ready to be in the spotlights, I'd advise you to join a support group first. It usually is not a problem if you're the fly on the wall there for a bit and from my experience it's a warm bath to meet people there. There's more room to open up on your own terms, which allows you to get more comfortable with it over time. At some point you may feel ready to have the focus on you in therapy. If that were to be in a group or one on one is mainly a matter of what your tharapeutic goals are.

Another way to approach this is to dive in head first. I guarantee you it's not going to kill you and it will teach you something about yourself. There's a real chance it isn't as bad as you imagine it to be and your glad you did it afterwards. Whichever choice you make, I wish you good luck with it!


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