# Guys I think I just over came my shyness



## APP Adrian (Feb 14, 2013)

Guys, after 6 months of trying to be more out going and talkative. I think I have over come my introversion. I can literally talk to anyone, I'm not afraid to go outside anymore. Also I can start a really conversion with anyone, including strangers!. For me, I got over my SA by just be out going and talking to every and being nice to everyone. I always initiated the conversation. Anyone here have any success stories? Also I have a high self esteem. I think everyone here with SA should just MAN UP and just go in there and talk to everyone, go to bars, participate in social events etc. I personally think that's the way to overcome SA.


Paul


----------



## visualkeirockstar (Aug 5, 2012)

I'm not interested in conversations though.


----------



## Dalmat (May 5, 2013)

Congratulations! I think I am currently moving it that direction too. How bad was it before?


----------



## Supra (Jul 19, 2012)

Yes, exposure is key, no one wants to listen to that though, they'd rather take pharmas.


----------



## Frostbite (May 14, 2013)

^ Yep

Run get away from the negativity of this forum!!


----------



## cottontree (Jul 12, 2013)

Frostbite said:


> ^ Yep
> 
> Run get away from the negativity of this forum!!


lol yeah.
I was debating whether or not to sign up for this forum, because I think a lot of people here are bringing a lot of negative energy and will only make me worse.

I'm really happy for the OP, and that's the real type of attitude we need to have.
MAN UP. JUST DO IT.

I had an online friend help me on skype when I was too nervous to txt a girl on phone, and later call her.
He then just started yelling stuff like "JUST DO IT! DO IT!", and basically it gave me the balls to just go ahead and do it; it gave me the confidence I needed.


----------



## Empty7 (May 22, 2013)

Congratulations!!! I guess I could do the same but I'm too afraid of rejection and being awkward, if I say hello to someone and he doesn't says hello back I automaticaly think both that I've made a mistake because I shouldn't have said hello to him and that he doesn't likes me.


----------



## APP Adrian (Feb 14, 2013)

Sin said:


> Congrats!!! now RUN AWAY FROM HERE WHILE YOU STILL CAN!!!!!


LOL

Not untill I get a girl friend and a real friends NOT aquantences XD

For now, i'm still going to chill on SA .


----------



## APP Adrian (Feb 14, 2013)

Empty7 said:


> Congratulations!!! I guess I could do the same but I'm too afraid of rejection and being awkward, if I say hello to someone and he doesn't says hello back I automaticaly think both that I've made a mistake because I shouldn't have said hello to him and that he doesn't likes me.


Thanks wolf, Always say hi to everyone even if they don't say hello back. When someone doesn't say back don't take offense too it and just move on. That's how I first started being more out going. Try it and let me know how it goes. I say hello and greet everyone i meet, whether it is in the library, one of my peers, an attractive woman on the bus,etc. Just MAN UP and say hello. No one will curse or hurt you, it's all in your head I think. Also if someone is staring at you it probably means they want to chat with you. Give it a shot


----------



## APP Adrian (Feb 14, 2013)

Dalmat said:


> Congratulations! I think I am currently moving it that direction too. How bad was it before?


It was horrible 6 months ago at my old high school. I didn't have any friends and everyone would give me the "evil eye" and scorn me. Even the all the teachers at my high school knew what was going on and also abandoned me also.I had to live like this for 3.5 years until I decided that I had enough. So I transferred high schools. During my last semester of high school I had the time of my life and I wasn't afraid to talk to people. Everyone in my new high school thinks I'm really out going and friendly.
Now I just graduated high school and will be starting my first year of university. You can do it just MAN UP and just jump into conversations. Forget what other people think of you.

I highly suggest you watch this motivational video that has helped me become more out going.


----------



## Ventura (May 5, 2009)

:yay Awesomee.


----------



## Raeden (Feb 8, 2013)

APP Adrian said:


> [Edit]-shyvr6


You should learn some empathy and tact.

Also, change your signature. It's ruining the page. ._.


----------



## Lish3rs (May 5, 2013)

^It's humongous. 

Indeed, lots of exposure is important. Introversion can be a little harder to break. I mean, most introverts usually do need time to recuperate and all that. I've been meeting more people a lot lately through friends, and it feels a lot more positive after getting it over with. It makes you feel more whole in a way.Being part of the world and all that. =p

Congrats! I'm Happy for you. ^.^


----------



## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

Congrads(I saw this from your other thread) but that won't work for everyone. You have to have good enough confidence and social skills to get it done though. Most people just walkaway if your conversation skills are sht like mines are, but I'm happy you got out of this hell though.


----------



## GrowingOut (Jul 14, 2013)

careful on possible relapse. Happens to me.

The thing about getting over the phase of making new friends is wanting to keep them. Speaking for myself I can make new friends but I get bored with them quickly and then just perfer to stay at home anyway.

including lovers


----------



## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

Raeden said:


> You should learn some empathy and tact.
> 
> Also, change your signature. It's ruining the page. ._.


What did he say?


----------



## Persephone The Dread (Aug 28, 2010)

Congratulations OP  not everyone can 'man up though', and I don't think it's negative to be realistic about the severity of your own SA. If you're at the point where it's so bad that when you go out it's an absolute nightmare, it will only make your opinion of these situations worse. In that case you should combine exposure with therapy (and perhaps even medication in severe cases.)


----------



## Raeden (Feb 8, 2013)

The Phantom Pain said:


> What did he say?


I think it was:

"OMG, you still have SA at 30. MAN UP!"

Something among those lines.


----------



## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

Raeden said:


> I think it was:
> 
> "OMG, you still have SA at 30. MAN UP!"
> 
> Something among those lines.


Yeah one thing I find annoying about some people get pass this crap is they go right into belittlement/sniping mode to people that still have it and almost instantly. Good he got past it, but does he really have to demean other people who were once in his same situation? So typical.

And the thing is if he has a crashing relapse, he'll be the main one coming back for sympathy and support.

It's statements like that that make you wonder if he probably deserves one.


----------



## Raeden (Feb 8, 2013)

The Phantom Pain said:


> Yeah one thing I find annoying about some people get pass this crap is they go right into belittlement/sniping mode to people that still have it and almost instantly.


I do wonder whether people who just "snap" out of it overnight really had SA to begin with. I think that it will always be with someone to some degree throughout their life. Maybe I'm just pessimistic, though.


----------



## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

Raeden said:


> I do wonder whether people who just "snap" out of it overnight really had SA to begin with. I think that it will always be with someone to some degree throughout their life. Maybe I'm just pessimistic, though.


I'm starting to think that as well as much as I hate to admit it. I'm hoping I can at least work through it enough to find employment and have a somewhat normal life, but it almost feels impossible sometimes(not to be too bleak, but it's true).

And after further looking at the threads he's started, he apparently didn't think he had SA either.

http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f34/i-dont-think-i-have-sa-302225/

In fact, based on the way he says he "cured" it, his avatar, and this thread right here:

http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f25/can-i-still-post-here-even-307489/

I'd say he's just trolling.

It's shame a site for a mental health disorder attracts such users in such large frequency now, but that's apparently what's happening. It's a joke.


----------



## Raeden (Feb 8, 2013)

The Phantom Pain said:


> I'm starting to think that as well as much as I hate to admit it. I'm hoping I can at least work through it enough to find employment and have a somewhat normal life, but it almost feels impossible sometimes(not to be too bleak, but it's true).


I wish the best for you. ^_^



> I'd say he's just trolling.
> 
> It's shame a site for a mental health disorder attracts such users in such large frequency now, but that's apparently what's happening. It's a joke.


My first instinct would be to say that he mistook shyness for social anxiety. However, considering one of his first posts also included "P.S people who are afraid to go outisde to their local grocery store are pathetic =D", I'd say it's a pretty big shot that he was just trolling the entire time.

I dunno, but targeting mental health forums for trolling seems pretty weak.


----------



## The Phantom Pain (Oct 6, 2010)

Raeden said:


> I wish the best for you. ^_^


Thanks. I appreciate it.



Raeden said:


> My first instinct would be to say that he mistook shyness for social anxiety. However, considering one of his first posts also included "P.S people who are afraid to go outisde to their local grocery store are pathetic =D", I'd say it's a pretty big shot that he was just trolling the entire time.
> 
> I dunno, but targeting mental health forums for trolling seems pretty weak.


That PS part made it pretty obvious to me. It is weak and it's been pretty widespread lately too. It's amazing how the mods will let post like that go yet they'll give out a ban warning for merely calling users out on stuff like that. And then they actually wonder why the trolling problem is getting worse.:blank

This is slowly becoming a bad place for support for that very reason.


----------



## LouAS (Jul 20, 2013)

I wish for me it was that simple. Don't fall into the state of mind that all you need to do is "MAN UP". Because you may relapse, and because of the man up philosophy you may feel less of a man because of it, which will not help at all. Be careful, don't be complacent.

I've done that, I've tried to be more of an extrovert. And it works, but not for long. For me it's more complicated. Maybe you'll be lucky. But just because you may have a patch of euphoria doesn't mean it's over mate


----------



## Jenchu (Dec 12, 2010)

APP Adrian said:


> It was horrible 6 months ago at my old high school. I didn't have any friends and everyone would give me the "evil eye" and scorn me. Even the all the teachers at my high school knew what was going on and also abandoned me also.I had to live like this for 3.5 years until I decided that I had enough. So I transferred high schools. During my last semester of high school I had the time of my life and I wasn't afraid to talk to people. Everyone in my new high school thinks I'm really out going and friendly.
> Now I just graduated high school and will be starting my first year of university. You can do it just MAN UP and just jump into conversations. Forget what other people think of you.
> 
> I highly suggest you watch this motivational video that has helped me become more out going.


Why do people act like they'e superior/smug when they overcome something...it's like a fat person losing weight and becoming skinny then goes around and makes fun of fat people.


----------



## modus (Apr 27, 2011)

He's just 17 years old and yeah, pride comes with power, especially that young. That doesn't mean OP is a jerk and regardless we should be congratulating him. The negativity is ridiculous toward someone who suffered through the same issues we face.

He's just saying to take risks. It had positive results for him. Good.


----------



## MikeinNirvana (Dec 2, 2012)

I think somewhat it has to do with the EGo that we build and do not allow us to confront and face some of our greatest fears.

We need to expose them and some how lower it.
OP has some advice here, and people who are in this state of mind knows that this can be your exit door.


----------

