# Academic self-sabotage?



## polythene (Jul 22, 2007)

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## anonymid (Oct 16, 2005)

This sounds like what happened to me in grad school. I'd always been a procrastinator, but at least I was always able to respond to the pressure of the last minute and get things done. But in my doctoral program I just stopped responding to that pressure, and couldn't make myself do anything. It's like I lost all capacity of will. I didn't finish most of my courses, got saddled with a number of incompletes, and was eventually forced to drop out. "Academic self-sabotage" sounds like the perfect term for it. I knew very well what was going to happen if I didn't get my work done, and still couldn't make myself do it. The fear of not knowing what I would do with my life if I had to drop out didn't serve as the motivator it should have.

Basically, I had the proverbial gun to my head and allowed myself to be shot.


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## Cypress (Dec 17, 2008)

Yep, my grades suck right now. My school is pretty easy and until I stop using depression and other things as cop outs, I will continue to do poorly in school


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## CrunchyCarrot (Feb 13, 2009)

Yup, I've engaged in my fair share of academic self sabotage. A lot of times. And each time, it made *no* sense whatsoever. I absolutely could have prevented it. I've always been a procrastinator as well, but I always studied and did my work. Uh, not anymore. The apathy that's enveloped me lately, though, is just unbelievable. So I probably shouldn't be giving out advice. lol. Still, it may help to keep the future in mind and make short and long-term goals. That's what I'm working on now.


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## millenniumman75 (Feb 4, 2005)

We distract ourselves with the thoughts from anxiety.

With me, it is almost the opposite. I will try and study too much. Unfortunately, I would often study the wrong material or just study something wrong aas a result.

Fear of failure.


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## solasum (Nov 17, 2008)

Yeah, I get through the day by telling myself that I'll study tomorrow. This continues until the day of the test.


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## Cypress (Dec 17, 2008)

millenniumman75 said:


> Fear of failure.


Can I buy some of that off you?

I'm overly confident with my abilities in school, and it seems to bite me from time to time. I think "I can learn the entire semester's worth of material one day before the final if I pull an all-nighter"...only to find out that there are 400 pages to read and by the time I scanned through the 400 pages throughout the night I realized that being sleep deprived while writing a timed essay doesn't work for me :no

Anything that requires creativity or something (like English papers) I actually do better while sleep deprived, history essays on the other hand :um


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## KumagoroBeam (Sep 15, 2008)

that's what i'm doing at the moment... sabotaging myself. i don't even want to think of the future, i have no ambitions or dreams whatsoever. 
i wish i was a little smarter^^


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## shelovescliche (Dec 17, 2006)

I always do this. Oddly enough, the things I hear in lecture tend to stick with me, so I remember a lot even if I didn't get enough studying in. I managed a 94 for a test I didn't study for last week (though that time the studying wasn't due to procrastination--I was really sick).

I do this for papers, too. It's sort of weird, because I never did this in high school. I always studied for at least an hour the night before, and ended up acing all tests.


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## mind_games (Nov 30, 2008)

Cypress said:


> Can I buy some of that off you?
> 
> *I'm overly confident with my abilities in school, and it seems to bite me from time to time. I think "I can learn the entire semester's worth of material one day before the final if I pull an all-nighter"*...only to find out that there are 400 pages to read and by the time I scanned through the 400 pages throughout the night I realized that being sleep deprived while writing a timed essay doesn't work for me :no
> 
> Anything that requires creativity or something (like English papers) I actually do better while sleep deprived, history essays on the other hand :um


I'm the same, but it didn't used to be like this. I used to start studying a month out from the test. Now its down to 1-2 days. I get B's and C's nowadays. The fear of failure has totally left me, and only seems to visit me on the final day before the exam when I start to panick and try (unsuccessfully) to cram all the semester's material into my head.


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## LALoner (Dec 3, 2008)

I was a horrible procrastinator all through my academic career. I think it must have been related to depression because it was worst during the time I had to go to Catholic school, which was the worst time of childhood and I still don't know how I even survived it.


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## tribute311 (Apr 8, 2008)

always get distracted. bad time management skills. plus schoolwork is hard anways and when i procrastinate, it makes it 100 times harder.


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## X33 (Feb 13, 2005)

Cypress said:


> I'm overly confident with my abilities in school, and it seems to bite me from time to time...


Ditto. This spills over into other activities as well, and sometimes causes me to underprepare. For example, in the interview season for grad school, the first time around, I only applied to a single school (that too a top ranked one) when the norm is ~10 schools. I was waitlisted. I don't know what I was thinking. There was 1 valid reason though - my application was started very late in the season due to something outside my control. So I had missed the deadline for most schools.
Last set of exams has put a dent in my confidence though. My average fell by 10% points, I barely passed some of the classes. Hopefully, because of it I will have better study habits and time management in the next quarter.


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## JayJay (Nov 18, 2003)

Studying makes me upset because I just can't handle getting things wrong, and I get frustrated very easily. For some reason I can't control myself to stay calm and read slowly with a clear mind. I skim over things like I have some sort of arrogance that tells me, "Oh I already know this stuff," But in actuality, I probably don't. I might have ADHD, who knows, or maybe it's the anxiety. I just always find myself going to things that make me happy whenever I engage in studying, which usually makes me abandon studying altogether.


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## bezoomny (Feb 10, 2007)

Yes. I do this so often, omg. I won't study for tests. I won't start homework until midnight, and then have a Ritalin and energy drink fueled all-nighter.

My problem (and this is probably an aspect of ADD/ADHD) is that I can't concentrate unless and until there's a great deal of pressure. If I can possibly put off something until later, I will put it off. Even if I'm bored out of my mind, I won't do homework, because I can't see a reason to until like an hour or two before it's due.

Like today, I've had a week to read _Candide_ for English class. My discussion section meets today at eleven AM, and _Candide_ must be read by then. I might be twenty pages into it. It's 5:30 in the morning.

The frustrating thing is that I know that I have the makings of an A-student. I have a strong desire to learn and my interests (the classical world) are incredibly relevant to nearly every topic. I can easily find a way to relate something boring, like astronomy, to something I find interesting. And I know a ton of general knowledge type things. The thing is that my procrastination and ADD and laziness turn me into a B/C student. I'm completely not living up to my potential.

I'm sorry if that last paragraph made me sound a little full of myself. I'm the first to admit that while I have booksmarts, I'm completely inept at the things in life that actually matter.


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