# i dont have friends anymore



## pablo123 (Feb 19, 2013)

they abandoned me and i think that it was because i dont talk i dont say **** when im with them.
i feel like a wight to them and i sucked all the fun around them.

has this happened to anyone??


----------



## RonBurgundy (Apr 1, 2012)

Yea I can only deal with one friend at a time. In groups, I add nothing and become an outcast. 

I was abandoned by all the friends I ever had, it is frustrating, but at least I was friends with them for that period of time before they turned their backs on me.


----------



## daisychainsandlaughs (Feb 29, 2012)

Yes, having a giant circle of friends was completely exhausting and overwhelming for me. I moved to a new city about a year ago, and it's just me and my boyfriend up here - kind of like starting over. I've gone out once with 'friends' I made at work and that's it. I try not to think of it as being a loner or a loser, I think it's just a matter of me having some time to get comfortable with myself and working things out, then going from there.


----------



## pablo123 (Feb 19, 2013)

daisychainsandlaughs said:


> Yes, having a giant circle of friends was completely exhausting and overwhelming for me. I moved to a new city about a year ago, and it's just me and my boyfriend up here - kind of like starting over. I've gone out once with 'friends' I made at work and that's it. I try not to think of it as being a loner or a loser, I think it's just a matter of me having some time to get comfortable with myself and working things out, then going from there.


yeh having a big group of "friends" can be exhausting i think im gonna stop hanging out with them... but i cant deny that im a loner, clearly people dont like to be around me.


----------



## Ghost in the Shell (May 25, 2013)

For me, having any friend seems very exhausting ever since I started working (at which point I started losing touch with friends). I like company as such but after I come from work, do few things of my own, take the dog out in the evening and the day is basically over. I just don't understand how others manage to also hang out with everyone, go to clubs, regularly drink together, go to concerts and various events and not feel drained and exhausted.


----------



## Shadowboy (Jun 12, 2013)

I'm an outcast and I'm abandoned by my friends too. When I'm in large groups it's like my ideas is absolutely different from others so I can't get along well and don't talk.

In my humble opinion, those who have a large circle of friends are not close friends with all of them. They are merely acquaintance with them and do not really hang out together regularly. They refer to them as "friend" either for simplicity or to show off. I think it's better to have few true close friends than large number of acquaintances.


----------



## Weilian (Mar 28, 2013)

Shadowboy said:


> I'm an outcast and I'm abandoned by my friends too. When I'm in large groups it's like my ideas is absolutely different from others so I can't get along well and don't talk.
> 
> In my humble opinion, those who have a large circle of friends are not close friends with all of them. They are merely acquaintance with them and do not really hang out together regularly. They refer to them as "friend" either for simplicity or to show off. I think it's better to have few true close friends than large number of acquaintances.


Do those "friends" believe in their own "ideas" or is it merely for show? Most of the "friends" I knew of just had it for show just to fit in.


----------



## AxlRose408 (Apr 11, 2013)

Some people are just introverted and it doesn't mean your weird or a loser. A lot of the great people in our history have been introverted and just different. Perhaps you are just not the type of person that requires social interaction. Try not to beat yourself up over it. Just remember, if you ever want to meet people, there are groups and clubs you can join. Cherish the time you have alone because once you start working, you'll wish you had more time to enjoy alone. You will be working with people that you will see for 50 hours a week. Weekends will just fly by. Try to meditate and come to peace with yourself. Go for walks, hit the gym, eat good food, listen to good music, surf the internet, join a team sport, learn a new skill, make online friends...etc...


----------



## Raeden (Feb 8, 2013)

Well, I just never had any to begin with. Not even people on the internet can stand me for more than 3 months.


----------



## copper (Nov 10, 2003)

Lost touch with what friends I had if you can call them that and never really made new ones. I do talk with people at work, but it doesn't go beyond acquaintance level. I never see them or do anything with them outside of the work environment. I very rarely talk to the neighbors unless they talk to me first. All I do is go to work, home, then home to work then on the weekends go visit my folks. I am constantly depressed and try to keep busy doing things to keep my mind off of the loneliness.


----------



## AxlRose408 (Apr 11, 2013)

Copper, 

Same boat. I've done some research on the difference between 'loneliness' and being 'alone.' Loneliness means you really feel the need for friends and social interaction. It is something you are feeling within your mind. You may think that just because you are alone, that you must be lonely. That is not the case. You can be alone and content. You can be alone and happy. Or you can continue to dwell on your sorrow and be lonely. Do you really crave friends and a social life? Do you need that to be happy? Or are you just envious of other people who have lots of friends and tons of social interaction? 

Occupying your time in a more effective manner can reduce the loneliness feeling. I tend to get lonely when I'm doing nothing. Like just laying in bed or something. Instead, I choose to occupy my time by doing things I love to do. Music, writing, surfing the net, researching things that interest me, video games, smoking cigarettes, etc...

I hope that makes sense.


----------



## H8PPLNDGS (Mar 15, 2013)

People are just not into me unless they need something or actually doing a project with me (depends what it is of course). 

A few can be considered friends but again it is more because I frequent the same place as they do i.e. work or volunteer placement. If I were to go elsewhere they will for sure forget about me and in time I will learn to do the same. 

It may be a bit hard on me at first when I leave a project, situation or place but I always have to remind myself that they will not care one way or another and for some people who just tolerate me will be relieved for 5 min and just move on. 

So for now I will try my best to place more importance on professional relationships (however to a limit) and re-learn professionalism and boundaries thereof. Most to all relationships of sorts are temporary anyway when common interested,thought patterns are somewhat aligned and tolerance levels are above normal.


----------



## wma1 (Jun 27, 2013)

I lost touch with my friends when I left school since then I've never really had any just work friends .I try to take my mind off the loneliness and depression by keeping busy.I fear havings a friend as its been 8years since I have had any.


----------



## ms413 (Jun 20, 2013)

I never had any to begin with. Obviously, I would like to gain some but due to circumstances and also my shyness, SA and lack of confidence, it's proved very difficult to achieve.


----------



## ms413 (Jun 20, 2013)

copper said:


> I do talk with people at work, but it doesn't go beyond acquaintance level.


This is what is happening to me for the most part. I seem to only make acquaintances and nothing more than that. I havesome Facebook pals as well (which I do appreciate) but no one local which is the bug bear for me and some of them don't even want to 'talk' to me or be in contact with for long periods at a time, I notice. I'm usually the one having to the 'chasing' - which is exhausting.


----------



## ms413 (Jun 20, 2013)

ridgelands said:


> Well I tend to have a few friends at any given time, they're not really "ideal" friends but I suppose that's better than nothing.


I think I feel quite similar in relation to my Facebook pals. I'd rather have them at least, than no-one at all.


----------



## ms413 (Jun 20, 2013)

wma1 said:


> I lost touch with my friends when I left school since then I've never really had any just work friends


It's good that you have work friends though. Perhaps you can build on what you already have with them.


----------



## Wrong Galaxy (Aug 13, 2010)

copper said:


> Lost touch with what friends I had if you can call them that and never really made new ones. *I do talk with people at work, but it doesn't go beyond acquaintance level. I never see them or do anything with them outside of the work environment.* I very rarely talk to the neighbors unless they talk to me first. All I do is go to work, home, then home to work then on the weekends go visit my folks. I am constantly depressed and try to keep busy doing things to keep my mind off of the loneliness.


Hey copper, I wonder how long have you been in this situation like are you in the same work for years now and same situation not talking to them outside work? do you feel your coworkers are weirded out or annoyed by this?.

Im in the same situation as you. Im on this call center job for 2 months now and I do talk and interact with my coworkers during work hours but after that, none nothing,null (though we do go out together and eat at restrants in the mall which is just beside our office) we don't even text even though we have each other's numbers!. It just so weird that during work we're talking stuff like that but after that it's just total cut-off. I feel like they're only forced to interact, socialize to me simply because Im around them in the work area.Which really sucks.


----------



## OtherBrain (Jul 4, 2013)

I wonder if twins ever feel this way


----------



## HanSolo (Jul 5, 2013)

I haven't had a single "friend" in almost 9 years and I'm fine with that, I do not want guy friends at all for friendship, maybe for backup in a bad situation. The commraudery??? type thing I now get from movies and video games and a couple of places like this. And I really do mean no friends, I'm a total loner, I say as few words as possible to people on jobs.

I would however like to have girlfriends to date and just hot girls to work with and look at etc, but that will never happen.


----------



## jap (Jul 1, 2013)

I have been living here in England now for 2 years and I haven't lost touch with my friends back home. I think when you really want to stay friends with each other, one will make their way to do it. Anyway, If you need someone to talk to, feel free to PM me. Have a good day!


----------



## Raevin (Jul 6, 2013)

RonBurgundy said:


> Yea I can only deal with one friend at a time. In groups, I add nothing and become an outcast.
> 
> I was abandoned by all the friends I ever had, it is frustrating, but at least I was friends with them for that period of time before they turned their backs on me.


I can relate. Either I have nothing to add or I try too hard and end up making an *** out of myself, either one leaves me depressed and lonely. Social interactions are difficult.


----------



## DRNKH813 (Jul 7, 2013)

I am 30 yo and I have 2 maybe 3 friends. My gf who I've been dating for 11 years is the same way, but I don't think she cares to much, maybe because she doesn't have social anxiety like me. I am afraid our wedding is gonna be a sad one. It is frustrating sometime to see people fb pictures and they're so happy around all their friends and when they post something they like like a million likes. I can't hang out with more than 1 person at a time, I feel like in a group I just suck all the fun out of it and eventually i just don't do it anymore. Yeah I can relate


----------

