# Late Twenties, Still in College, Living w/ parents...it's horrible...



## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

My dad just lectured me again about how he's afraid I'm going to be homeless if I don't start doing things with my days. I want to move out so badly. I feel like a ****ing teenager with these ****ing "talks". I wish they would just leave me alone! My dad can marathon Futurama on Netflix until sunrise, but when I sleep in it means I'm about to kill myself...the hypocrisy is deafening. 

I wish they would just tell me they'd like me to get a job, or they want me to clean up around the house more. I should be reigned in a bit there, but all they had to do was ask me to pick up the slack. Instead they give me these melodramatic lectures about how they care about me so much. Go **** yourselves. If I don't want your help you can't force it down my throat. My dad was telling me he was worried that my brother and sister would disown me if my mom and himself died because they were so disgusted with how I was living. WTF, I ****ing hate these people. If they thought this then why didn't THEY tell me? I'm gonna need a lot of drugs, and focus to make it through next semester. ****ing hell. I need to get out of my parents house!

That first night in my first real single bedroom apartment is going to be celebrated merrily with wine and a ****ing feast- maybe even a carton of cigarettes. I'm losing my mind still living with my parents.


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## ShrimpSauce (Jan 12, 2012)

you're not alone if it makes you feel better...my brother is 28 spent 10 years in college hasnt graduated yet...still depending on parents, I have a friend who is the same way. I am 23-- I did finish college but with a useless degree, still depending on parents. -_- I'd spend time studying at the library than at home to avoid more parent contact


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## AnotherGuy (Aug 5, 2013)

mcmuffinme said:


> My dad just lectured me again about how he's afraid I'm going to be homeless if I don't start doing things with my days. I want to move out so badly. I feel like a ****ing teenager with these ****ing "talks". I wish they would just leave me alone! My dad can marathon Futurama on Netflix until sunrise, but when I sleep in it means I'm about to kill myself...the hypocrisy is deafening.
> 
> I wish they would just tell me they'd like me to get a job, or they want me to clean up around the house more. I should be reigned in a bit there, but all they had to do was ask me to pick up the slack. Instead they give me these melodramatic lectures about how they care about me so much. Go **** yourselves. If I don't want your help you can't force it down my throat. My dad was telling me he was worried that my brother and sister would disown me if my mom and himself died because they were so disgusted with how I was living. WTF, I ****ing hate these people. If they thought this then why didn't THEY tell me? I'm gonna need a lot of drugs, and focus to make it through next semester. ****ing hell. I need to get out of my parents house!
> 
> That first night in my first real single bedroom apartment is going to be celebrated merrily with wine and a ****ing feast- maybe even a carton of cigarettes. I'm losing my mind still living with my parents.


Hey mcmuffinme. I hear where you're coming from. I'm experiencing some of what you're saying. You suspect that maybe they want you to pick up the slack a bit more. You should see if they change their attitude if you just start doing the tasks you talked about without them telling you to. Maybe that might help them change their outlook on you.

Like I said, I'm going through something similar. My parents aren't outright saying anything, but I myself am taking active steps toward getting as far from them as possible. I'm diligently seeking work, despite my sleep problems I try getting up as early as possible to help out more, and I offer THEM help instead of the other way around. My parents are weird people though, they try to refuse the most help possible so that later on they throw in my face that I didn't do this or that.

I don't think you're lazy or a bad person. I think that you're like most people here, myself included: I think that you just need to find your way. There comes a time in the kid/parent relationship where you can do NOTHING to agree with or please your parents. The only solution is the obvious one, and that is to move out. They'll ALWAYS have the "we're your parents, we know what's best for you" attitude, but they aren't trying to control you. They really do want the best for you. The only way to back them off is to disappear. I've recently come to realize this myself. I'm dying to find work so that I can leave lol. One day at a time, right?


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## bottleofblues (Aug 6, 2008)

Yeah you need to get out, the downside of it being more expensive is easily outweighed by the freedom of living independently. Whats stopping you finances, or anxiety about living with strangers?
I get on with my folks but living with them they drive me balmy, its pretty common.


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

AnotherGuy said:


> Hey mcmuffinme. I hear where you're coming from. I'm experiencing some of what you're saying. You suspect that maybe they want you to pick up the slack a bit more. You should see if they change their attitude if you just start doing the tasks you talked about without them telling you to. Maybe that might help them change their outlook on you.
> 
> Like I said, I'm going through something similar. My parents aren't outright saying anything, but I myself am taking active steps toward getting as far from them as possible. I'm diligently seeking work, despite my sleep problems I try getting up as early as possible to help out more, and I offer THEM help instead of the other way around. My parents are weird people though, they try to refuse the most help possible so that later on they throw in my face that I didn't do this or that.
> 
> I don't think you're lazy or a bad person. I think that you're like most people here, myself included: I think that you just need to find your way. There comes a time in the kid/parent relationship where you can do NOTHING to agree with or please your parents. The only solution is the obvious one, and that is to move out. They'll ALWAYS have the "we're your parents, we know what's best for you" attitude, but they aren't trying to control you. They really do want the best for you. The only way to back them off is to disappear. I've recently come to realize this myself. I'm dying to find work so that I can leave lol. One day at a time, right?


I am all for helping out around the house, and getting a job again. I know I need to do both of those things. Well, I'm not sure why my parents care if I have a job considering I often pay their bills for them because I saved so much and never spend anything, and they always seem to be broke. Between student grants from the government, and my own personal savings, I haven't asked them for anything regarding my education. They mostly provide the roof over my head and often the food. So, I think they just want me to get a job so I'll appear socially normal, and it'd put THEIR minds at rest because at present I ain't doing **** with my life. I'm incredibly nihilistic, and not religious- so I think they freak out when they see my behavior and think I've lost the light of god, or some b.s. like that, whereas I see it as just a combination of laziness and depression at worst. But yea, I should clean up around the house, and get a job as soon as possible, regardless. That day I graduate...it just can't come any faster.


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## callmebas (Jan 11, 2013)

Kind of my life. Still in university, no job at this point. It used to be better when i attended lectures and workshops as i had to be active to keep it going. Now i'm left with graduation projects which require presentation. That is one of the reasons i've been postponing it.

Living in this house used to be my peace and quiet in this world. But the last couple of years things are depressive in here. I also get lectured about how bad i am, yet they don't encourage me or share my problem. They consider me worthless, but don't say it and tend to blame me for everything that is not working properly. I don't even have any expenses as i have no real life. They should realise who they are dealing with and offer any kind of help rather than consider me their problem. I should also mention that whatever i do for help in the house, counts for nothing, as the only thing that would count would be to get out of here.

I hope i can manage to move on from this point and somewhere in the future can live on my own, although it seems blurry for now.


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## forex (Dec 29, 2010)

Lol i can relate, that is why i am searching for my own crib But it hard.

supply and demand.


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## JennaReiko (Feb 8, 2012)

Ah this is so close to home. My mother treats me like a child then expects me to act like an adult. She doesn't ask me to do things, she expects me to do things and when I don't do everything she expects then it's a big ***** fest! Not to mention she never says thank you and she's always saying to people and me that I need to start doing more around the house when I basically do all the work.

_Posted via *Topify* using iPhone/iPad_


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

mcmuffinme said:


> I am all for helping out around the house, and getting a job again. I know I need to do both of those things. Well, I'm not sure why my parents care if I have a job considering I often pay their bills for them because I saved so much and never spend anything, and they always seem to be broke. Between student grants from the government, and my own personal savings, I haven't asked them for anything regarding my education. They mostly provide the roof over my head and often the food. So, I think they just want me to get a job so I'll appear socially normal, and it'd put THEIR minds at rest because at present I ain't doing **** with my life. I'm incredibly nihilistic, and not religious- so I think they freak out when they see my behavior and think I've lost the light of god, or some b.s. like that, whereas I see it as just a combination of laziness and depression at worst. But yea, I should clean up around the house, and get a job as soon as possible, regardless. That day I graduate...it just can't come any faster.


Well, if you go to a public college your biggest expense will be rent and food. Tuition and books are nothing compared to those expenses.


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## LolaViola (Jun 23, 2013)

I'm in a similar situation, but I have no one to blame but myself. I isolated my way into this ****hole. Of course, SA didn't really alleviate things for me...


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## Setolac (Jul 26, 2009)

mcmuffinme said:


> My dad just lectured me again about how he's afraid I'm going to be homeless if I don't start doing things with my days. I want to move out so badly. I feel like a ****ing teenager with these ****ing "talks". I wish they would just leave me alone! My dad can marathon Futurama on Netflix until sunrise, but when I sleep in it means I'm about to kill myself...the hypocrisy is deafening.
> 
> I wish they would just tell me they'd like me to get a job, or they want me to clean up around the house more. I should be reigned in a bit there, but all they had to do was ask me to pick up the slack. Instead they give me these melodramatic lectures about how they care about me so much. Go **** yourselves. If I don't want your help you can't force it down my throat. My dad was telling me he was worried that my brother and sister would disown me if my mom and himself died because they were so disgusted with how I was living. WTF, I ****ing hate these people. If they thought this then why didn't THEY tell me? I'm gonna need a lot of drugs, and focus to make it through next semester. ****ing hell. I need to get out of my parents house!
> 
> That first night in my first real single bedroom apartment is going to be celebrated merrily with wine and a ****ing feast- maybe even a carton of cigarettes. I'm losing my mind still living with my parents.


Just realized you were female. Normal women can actually be excused from this since they can just find a husband who could support them instead of getting a job but this does not apply to you since you are not one of the normals since you have S.A.

When you say late 20's do you mean 25 and up?
Do you have any work experience?
What did you do for the 18-present?
What degree are you pursuing? Is this your first degree?


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

How close are you to finishing college?

I currently live with my parents and have felt guilty about it for the past two-and-a-half years (I am moving out soon though...hoorah!) I get that part. Also, the fact that you do not want to live with your parents forever is a good sign, yes? 

Secondly, my sister is having the same worries about her son. She's worried about him finding a job and succeeding in life, and ya know...he has some time. You have some time. It is going to be okay. Maybe tell your parents that.

I am sorry you had to be a part of that horribly uncomfortable lecture. You will be okay. :yes


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## sarafinanickelbocker (May 16, 2010)

Setolac said:


> Just realized you were female. Normal women can actually be excused from this since they can just find a husband who could support them instead of getting a job but this does not apply to you since you are not one of the normals since you have S.A.
> 
> When you say late 20's do you mean 25 and up?
> Do you have any work experience?
> ...


In this current age, families need two incomes to keep the household running. (now returning to current programming)


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## mcmuffinme (Mar 12, 2010)

bottleofblues said:


> Yeah you need to get out, the downside of it being more expensive is easily outweighed by the freedom of living independently. Whats stopping you finances, or anxiety about living with strangers?
> I get on with my folks but living with them they drive me balmy, its pretty common.


Yea, finances are stopping me. My car is just about to crap out on me too. I might need to buy a new car. I haven't had a job in maybe 3 years. I'm afraid to go back into the workforce, but I know I have to. I'm putting off until mid-May...then I will work some insipid job for 6-8 months and try to break free from this hell that is living with parents at 26!


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## shyguyred (Jul 26, 2013)

Setolac said:


> Just realized you were female. Normal women can actually be excused from this since they can just find a husband who could support them instead of getting a job but this does not apply to you since you are not one of the normals since you have S.A.
> 
> When you say late 20's do you mean 25 and up?
> Do you have any work experience?
> ...


lol did you take a time machine from the 1950,s


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## bottleofblues (Aug 6, 2008)

mcmuffinme said:


> Yea, finances are stopping me. My car is just about to crap out on me too. I might need to buy a new car. I haven't had a job in maybe 3 years. I'm afraid to go back into the workforce, but I know I have to. I'm putting off until mid-May...then I will work some insipid job for 6-8 months and try to break free from this hell that is living with parents at 26!


Yeah i've got to get back to work asap as well been unemployed for past couple of months but its been nice been keeping myself busy. I don't really want to go back to work to be honest work is almost always tedious and boring as well as anxiety provoking.
A lot of us don't want to work, but you need money to survive get that job and save and keep that goal in mind, you don't want to live with your folks forever by the sounds of it.


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## shiningknight (May 12, 2013)

Don't feel bad, living with your parents at a late age is actually common in some cultures. One of my flatmates lived with his parents until he was 26 and now has a good paying job, a SO, three nice vehicles, and his own house.


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## Lacking Serotonin (Nov 18, 2012)

Don't feel bad. I'm 24 and still live with my parents.


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## komorikun (Jan 11, 2009)

shiningknight said:


> Don't feel bad, living with your parents at a late age is actually common in some cultures. One of my flatmates lived with his parents until he was 26 and now has a good paying job, a SO, three nice vehicles, and his own house.


How can he have have flatmates if he has his own house?


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## barbell (Jan 20, 2014)

You need a plan before you graduate college. If you graduate and still have no idea what to do, or don't have a job, you'll be in a real mess. It's not great advice but all I can say is use your college graduation as a deadline to get your life on some sort of track.


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## Testsubject (Nov 25, 2013)

You are old enough to have your parents legally admitted to a mental hospital. Once done you can keep the house. Problem solved


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