# I think my therapist is ripping me off.



## ThereWillBeAnxiety (Dec 8, 2012)

I started the treatment with him about 3 or 4 months ago. Right off our first session he said that he wanted to see me twice a week.

Thing is, my anxiety is bad in a way that I don't have much of a social life and I avoid social situations but I never get panic attacks. It's more of Agoraphobia/Avoidant Personality Disorder than Social Anxiety I think.

Anyway.

Just listen to this. I ended up missing 4 sessions on the first two weeks of the year. And I missed another last week. (still seeing him once last week.) Now two days ago he told me that maybe I should see him 3 TIMES this week. Monday, Wednesday and Friday! to make up for the missed session of last week.

Money isn't a problem but wtf? It's not the first time he tries something like this. I usually say that I can't, and I'll just see him on the next week and he starts whining saying that I can't miss sessions that it's an ongoing treatment and all that jazz.

I'm starting to think he's just being really greedy. I even told him on Monday that I've been great, I went out with my friends without feeling anxious and he still wants to see me 3 times this week? Am I just being paranoid or this sounds fishy or am I being paranoid? 

Anyway, I'll tell him tomorrow that I can't go Friday and that from now on I just want to see him once a week.


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## SuperSky (Feb 16, 2011)

That's fairly weird. Has he explained how the super frequent sessions are supposed to help?
When I went, it was barely once a month.


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## mca90guitar (Sep 12, 2012)

Well the man is running a business. Everytime you come over thats another check in his pocket. Maybe business isnt doing so good for him? Either way, your paying, go when you want.


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## SilentWitness (Dec 27, 2009)

No, you're not being paranoid, your therapist is being greedy, 3 times a week sounds excessive. I use to see my therapist once a week and then after 6 mths, it was once a fortnight. I can't see the benefit in seeing him more than once a week. You're making progress so you should be cutting back not increasing. Doesn't sound right.


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## ThereWillBeAnxiety (Dec 8, 2012)

Yeah. I'm looking it up now on how often people in this forum go to therapy and it rarely is twice a week.

**** that guy. I'm not even going today.


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## ThereWillBeAnxiety (Dec 8, 2012)

Dude's only making me more anxious with all that ****.


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## Samtrix (Aug 22, 2011)

What kind of therapy are you doing? Traditional psychoanalysis does not work for phobias, so if you are doing psychoanalysis, I'd say to go find help with someone else. This book has a few methods for reducing anxiety http://bookos.org/book/1378323 by going straight to your subconscious, rather than trying to rationalize your concsious thinking. I haven't had a chance to try them myself yet, I only finished the book yesterday.


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## Monroee (Aug 26, 2009)

Sounds way too excessive to me. I used to go once a week and even that started to feel like too much. So much money wasted when I probably would have been fine with once every two weeks. He didn't actually help me at all, just ranting sessions. So he made a sh-tload of money off of me by _not_ helping me.

I'd say be upfront and tell him that you'd prefer once a week (or whenever you actually want to go). It's your money, your therapy, and you should have the only say in how much you want to go in.

Also, too much therapy can actually have a negative effect on people. My once a week therapy started having a very negative effect and made me worse.


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## Michael127 (Dec 10, 2011)

I go once every month and that is enough for me. I was actually thinking today about taking a break for a few months. Also, for me, I found once a week was too much for me. I hardly got to use any of the new skills given to me in the previous week, when I was set to go back again. And, I did not have much to talk about after only a one week break.

I think your instincts are right. He might be seeing you as his own personal piggy bank. My counsellour tries something like this rarely (less now) and I shut him down right away. I make the decision on when, where and how much my counselling is, not him.


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## VanGogh (Jan 13, 2013)

I've been going twice a week but a lot of weeks one day or the other the facility is closed so it's more like 1.5 times each week. Early on it felt better for me to do that because I had a lot to dig up but now it feels like once a week is fine until I start pushing myself more outside my comfort zones.


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## meedo (Oct 4, 2011)

ThereWillBeAnxiety said:


> I started the treatment with him about 3 or 4 months ago. Right off our first session he said that he wanted to see me twice a week.
> 
> Thing is, my anxiety is bad in a way that I don't have much of a social life and I avoid social situations but I never get panic attacks. It's more of Agoraphobia/Avoidant Personality Disorder than Social Anxiety I think.
> 
> ...


I would say .. Maximum.. 3 times a month...


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## Sierpinski (Jun 17, 2012)

Having the client come in more than once a week usually indicates a psychodynamic approach. When you tell him you are feeling better, that will not impress him at all. Generally psychoanalytically oriented psychotherapists do not expect real improvement until after 2 or 3 years. Frankly, I would run like hell away from a psychodynamically oriented therapist.


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## SandyInfinity (Feb 7, 2013)

fire him u dont need him anymore
and when u do, just change him


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## IOGG (Feb 17, 2013)

Honestly, I don't think your psychologist is greedy as you say. The therapeutic process involves rules. As far as I know, you must go to every meeting, in order to obtain success. It also depends on the method you've chosen. If you go to a psychoanalyst, three times a week is not very much. 

Good luck!


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## hoddesdon (Jul 28, 2011)

Well, if you have missed sessions is it not reasonable to go more often after that to keep on schedule or make up lost ground?


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## Evo1114 (Dec 9, 2012)

I go once every 2 weeks, but I'm switching that to once a month. Since I started the anti-depressants, my anger is basically non-existent and I've never been depressed anyways except for the occasional bout of loneliness. I think I'm comfortable with my disorder and I know I can actually live a healthy fulfilling life. I have done so for most of my life. I would think talking to people who actually live with this is more helpful anyways. I think people who have never lived with it have no idea of how the anxiety makes us feel or impacts our lives in certain situations. I don't care how long they've studied. 

I actually have an appointment tonight to get my prescription renewed and I'm trying to think of something to ***** about but I can't think of anything.


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## FormerOptimist (Feb 15, 2013)

IOGG said:


> Honestly, I don't think your psychologist is greedy as you say. The therapeutic process involves rules. As far as I know, you must go to every meeting, in order to obtain success. It also depends on the method you've chosen. If you go to a psychoanalyst, three times a week is not very much.
> 
> Good luck!


There are NO rules in therapy! The client is encouraged to do the best they can as often as they can. Naturally, the more active participation from the client, the more chance of their succeeding. But no one is forced to do anything and there are certainly no formal rules (other than how they collect payment!).


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## FormerOptimist (Feb 15, 2013)

ThereWillBeAnxiety said:


> Yeah. I'm looking it up now on how often people in this forum go to therapy and it rarely is twice a week.
> 
> **** that guy. I'm not even going today.


You can't make-up for a missed session from the previous week by adding an extra session to the current week.....that's assinine. Therapy requires time between sessions for the client to live their life a little before returning. Going every 48 hours in one week is NOT going to be of anymore benefit......even less benefit really.

He's a greedy crook, most definitely. Run like hell.


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## Fangsfriend (Dec 9, 2012)

You should only go as much as you are comfortable with. I wouldn't want to feel pressured to show up more times than YOU feel is necessary-it's your therapy not his.

You should be upfront tho with him, and tell him outright you think he's got you pegged as a ATM machine and you don't like it.

Always best to be honest with the shrink!


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## bent (Aug 4, 2005)

Don't waste more time and money giving him a life and letting him feel powerful by talking down to you and manipulating you into going.


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## Maslow (Dec 24, 2003)

Obviously, it's not working. Therapy is a scam. If it works, it's due to the placebo effect. You might enjoy talking to a therapist, but that's not going to make you better.


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## FormerOptimist (Feb 15, 2013)

Maslow said:


> Obviously, it's not working. Therapy is a scam. If it works, it's due to the placebo effect. You might enjoy talking to a therapist, but that's not going to make you better.


Maslow, I've never heard it worded quite that way, but you're right.

A placebo effect happens when people believe that something is going to make them improve, even if that something is actually nothing.

If people believe they will improve in therapy, they usually do.......typical placebo effect......I get the connection now.


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## Maslow (Dec 24, 2003)

FormerOptimist said:


> Maslow, I've never heard it worded quite that way, but you're right.
> 
> A placebo effect happens when people believe that something is going to make them improve, even if that something is actually nothing.
> 
> If people believe they will improve in therapy, they usually do.......typical placebo effect......I get the connection now.


That's not saying it doesn't have it's benefits. I went to a therapist for a while and she helped me deal with things that happened in my past, but it wasn't any particular type of therapy that helped me; it was just having someone to talk to who didn't judge me. She gave me something to look forward to during a difficult period in my life.

You have to deal with the past before you can look to the future with any kind of optimism, and a good therapist provides an environment where you can do that. There are a lot of bad therapists out there, though.


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## FormerOptimist (Feb 15, 2013)

Maslow said:


> That's not saying it doesn't have it's benefits. I went to a therapist for a while and she helped me deal with things that happened in my past, but it wasn't any particular type of therapy that helped me; it was just having someone to talk to who didn't judge me. She gave me something to look forward to during a difficult period in my life.
> 
> You have to deal with the past before you can look to the future with any kind of optimism, and a good therapist provides an environment where you can do that. There are a lot of bad therapists out there, though.


That is precisely the reason why people who have just one good friend that they can confide in are so much better off than those who have no one in their life whom they can trust. A non-judgmental friend is a rare, precious gift that is worth so much more than any formal therapy can provide.


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## Maslow (Dec 24, 2003)

FormerOptimist said:


> That is precisely the reason why people who have just one good friend that they can confide in are so much better off than those who have no one in their life whom they can trust. A non-judgmental friend is a rare, precious gift that is worth so much more than any formal therapy can provide.


Absolutely. Friends and family provide a social support network and generate happiness. It's almost impossible to be happy when you're alone. I spent several years without anyone, and it was a horrible time in my life. It's like trying to live without oxygen. People often don't appreciate their friends, but just try to live without them.


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